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1
00:00:10,241 --> 00:00:13,754
Is it weird that we're
sneaking around to make out like kids
2
00:00:13,801 --> 00:00:15,723
when our actual kids
are waiting at home?
3
00:00:15,725 --> 00:00:16,765
Yeah.
4
00:00:16,767 --> 00:00:18,560
Before I left the house,
my 15-year-old told me
5
00:00:18,964 --> 00:00:20,924
to tone down the makeup
and be home by 11:00.
6
00:00:21,008 --> 00:00:22,342
Ah, screw her. She's so lame.
7
00:00:23,844 --> 00:00:26,221
That's weird. My daughter
said, "Fifth date, Dad."
8
00:00:26,304 --> 00:00:28,515
Don't bother coming home
unless you get some."
9
00:00:28,598 --> 00:00:29,641
She's three.
10
00:00:29,725 --> 00:00:32,185
Hmm.
11
00:00:32,269 --> 00:00:36,023
I hate to let her down, but I'm more
of a seventh-date kind of girl.
12
00:00:36,106 --> 00:00:38,191
Unrelated, do you want to go
on two dates tomorrow?
13
00:00:39,901 --> 00:00:42,621
Actually, my friends are having
a dinner party.
14
00:00:42,871 --> 00:00:44,147
Do you want to come?
15
00:00:44,231 --> 00:00:45,607
Ay!
16
00:00:45,610 --> 00:00:47,971
- Yeah, you're right. It's too soon.
- No, I wanna come.
17
00:00:48,035 --> 00:00:50,787
This "ay" was for my mom.
18
00:00:51,621 --> 00:00:54,499
My ex is coming back from Afghanistan
for Elena's quinces,
19
00:00:54,583 --> 00:00:55,959
and she keeps texting me.
20
00:00:56,084 --> 00:00:59,129
"Pick up his favorite soda.
Pick up his favorite potato chips.
21
00:00:59,212 --> 00:01:01,673
Take him back,
so I can die a happy woman."
22
00:01:01,757 --> 00:01:02,758
Hmm.
23
00:01:03,258 --> 00:01:07,012
So your mom's really into your ex.
That's... great.
24
00:01:08,472 --> 00:01:10,057
Victor's in the past.
25
00:01:11,975 --> 00:01:14,436
And I'm putting my phone on silent.
26
00:01:15,062 --> 00:01:16,772
Mmm.
27
00:01:23,445 --> 00:01:25,781
That's me.
28
00:01:27,866 --> 00:01:31,620
"Dear Lupe's friend. Is her phone
on silent, or did you kidnap her?"
29
00:01:34,206 --> 00:01:35,791
How does your mom have my number?
30
00:01:37,626 --> 00:01:38,835
I don't know.
31
00:02:30,595 --> 00:02:32,472
That really happened. I'm not kidding.
32
00:02:32,556 --> 00:02:35,392
Ay, qué bueno, you are home.
33
00:02:35,475 --> 00:02:37,561
We are Skyping...
34
00:02:38,562 --> 00:02:44,026
a handsome,
available man in Afghanistan.
35
00:02:46,236 --> 00:02:47,362
It's Victor.
36
00:02:50,240 --> 00:02:51,616
Your husband?
37
00:02:53,493 --> 00:02:56,371
- Is that your mami I hear?
- Yeah, she wants to say hi.
38
00:02:56,455 --> 00:02:58,165
Hi, Victor! Everything good?
Great. See you next week.
39
00:02:58,248 --> 00:02:59,916
Mami, I need some help in the kitchen.
40
00:03:00,417 --> 00:03:03,670
In a minute. Victor is showing us
a picture of a funny camel.
41
00:03:04,171 --> 00:03:06,131
It is very tiny.
42
00:03:06,757 --> 00:03:08,300
It has no humps.
43
00:03:08,717 --> 00:03:10,552
And... it is a dog.
44
00:03:12,596 --> 00:03:15,098
So... quick question.
45
00:03:15,182 --> 00:03:18,894
When Papi's here next week,
do I have to, like, hang out with him?
46
00:03:18,977 --> 00:03:22,448
The whole reason
he's coming home is for your quinces.
47
00:03:22,531 --> 00:03:24,149
Plus, we haven't seen him
in over a year.
48
00:03:24,232 --> 00:03:26,860
I love Papi,
but we have nothing in common.
49
00:03:26,943 --> 00:03:28,945
Every time we Skype,
we just stare at each other
50
00:03:29,029 --> 00:03:32,699
until one of us thinks the screen froze.
And sometimes I just pretend it...
51
00:03:33,367 --> 00:03:34,701
Look, I get it,
52
00:03:34,785 --> 00:03:36,370
but it's only for a few days.
53
00:03:36,453 --> 00:03:39,915
And, uh, where are we
with the idea of telling him?
54
00:03:39,998 --> 00:03:43,502
Oh, who thinks it's a good idea
to greet my Latino veteran dad with,
55
00:03:43,585 --> 00:03:45,337
"Hey, I like girls!"
56
00:03:47,047 --> 00:03:48,840
You'll finally have something in common.
57
00:03:50,467 --> 00:03:52,469
So, Lupita,
aren't you going to talk to Victor?
58
00:03:52,552 --> 00:03:53,553
No.
59
00:03:53,637 --> 00:03:56,139
Right, not the way you look.
Here, you need a lipstick.
60
00:03:56,223 --> 00:03:58,600
Oh, thank you.
61
00:03:58,684 --> 00:04:02,270
I am telling you,
he is back to how he used to be.
62
00:04:02,354 --> 00:04:06,608
I know he says he's sober, which is
great, but he needs to get actual help
63
00:04:06,692 --> 00:04:08,944
or the drinking and the pills
could start all over again.
64
00:04:09,027 --> 00:04:11,196
Plus, he's not even
dealing with his PTS.
65
00:04:11,279 --> 00:04:15,242
Oh, but he looks so healthy.
His skin is glowing.
66
00:04:15,325 --> 00:04:16,493
Hashtag, no filter.
67
00:04:17,285 --> 00:04:20,372
Victor and I are not
a thing anymore.
68
00:04:20,455 --> 00:04:22,416
- Okay? You got it?
- Of course.
69
00:04:23,083 --> 00:04:24,751
Oh, give him a chance.
70
00:04:25,877 --> 00:04:28,797
Remember how you two used
to sing the karaoke?
71
00:04:28,880 --> 00:04:30,757
And dance into the night?
72
00:04:30,841 --> 00:04:32,968
And remember your wedding day?
73
00:04:33,635 --> 00:04:35,262
God, I looked beautiful.
74
00:04:37,681 --> 00:04:39,433
Ooh, what are you doing, papito?
75
00:04:39,516 --> 00:04:42,102
Since Papi can't be here
for my cello recital tomorrow,
76
00:04:42,185 --> 00:04:44,021
I'm gonna play my part
of the quartet for him.
77
00:04:55,324 --> 00:04:57,075
My God, he is a genius.
78
00:04:58,869 --> 00:05:02,080
It makes more sense
when the other three people are playing.
79
00:05:02,164 --> 00:05:03,582
I wish you could be here.
80
00:05:03,665 --> 00:05:04,666
Oh, yeah.
81
00:05:05,417 --> 00:05:07,252
Wouldn't it be cool if I could do
that Star Trek thing
82
00:05:07,336 --> 00:05:09,379
where I could just transport there?
83
00:05:09,463 --> 00:05:11,465
I'd be all, "Oye, Scotty,
beam me up, yo."
84
00:05:15,927 --> 00:05:17,137
Whoa, it worked.
85
00:05:17,220 --> 00:05:19,181
I was aiming for the living room.
I just missed.
86
00:05:19,264 --> 00:05:20,766
Papi!
87
00:05:20,849 --> 00:05:23,018
You grew!
88
00:05:24,227 --> 00:05:25,729
Papi!
89
00:05:29,608 --> 00:05:32,986
Okay. Wow, look at you.
Beautiful, huh?
90
00:05:33,070 --> 00:05:34,988
You must be breaking
all the boys' hearts.
91
00:05:39,326 --> 00:05:40,869
Looking good, viejita.
92
00:05:40,952 --> 00:05:42,954
Vente pa' ca. Dame un beso.
93
00:05:51,838 --> 00:05:52,839
Okay, let's break it up.
94
00:05:52,924 --> 00:05:54,550
Everyone has told everyone
they're attractive.
95
00:05:54,633 --> 00:05:56,885
Hiya, Lupe.
96
00:05:57,886 --> 00:05:58,929
Hi.
97
00:05:59,471 --> 00:06:01,682
Well, this is a surprise,
because it's not a week from now.
98
00:06:02,474 --> 00:06:04,935
But it's all good, 'cause I got
your many messages and texts
99
00:06:05,018 --> 00:06:07,145
telling me you were coming early.
Oh, wait.
100
00:06:08,105 --> 00:06:10,273
- None of that happened.
- Yes.
101
00:06:10,357 --> 00:06:11,984
I know, I'm early,
but I really wanted to surprise
102
00:06:12,067 --> 00:06:13,819
papi chulo over here
and see his cello show.
103
00:06:13,902 --> 00:06:14,945
Awesome.
104
00:06:15,028 --> 00:06:17,906
Qué nice, qué thoughtful...
105
00:06:18,699 --> 00:06:21,785
Kay Jewelers.
They sell engagement rings.
106
00:06:25,831 --> 00:06:28,834
- And anyway, Lupe, I booked a hotel.
- Okay, that sounds good.
107
00:06:28,917 --> 00:06:29,960
That sounds outrageous.
108
00:06:30,544 --> 00:06:33,463
He is family.
Family doesn't stay in a hotel.
109
00:06:33,547 --> 00:06:35,674
Would you want me to live in a hotel?
110
00:06:39,886 --> 00:06:41,388
- Hello?
- No, no, no.
111
00:06:42,472 --> 00:06:43,598
Exactly.
112
00:06:46,768 --> 00:06:50,022
You understand. You know, we weren't
expecting you for another week,
113
00:06:50,105 --> 00:06:52,941
and if you just drop in
out of the blue like this,
114
00:06:53,025 --> 00:06:55,243
you can't really expect us
to be ready for you, it's...
115
00:06:55,527 --> 00:06:56,611
Ready.
116
00:06:59,823 --> 00:07:02,367
Wow.
Is that a pillow mint?
117
00:07:02,451 --> 00:07:03,552
Can't Papi stay here, Mami?
118
00:07:05,746 --> 00:07:06,747
Yeah, sure.
119
00:07:06,830 --> 00:07:09,249
¡Perfecto!
120
00:07:09,333 --> 00:07:12,711
You can have my bed.
I will sleep with Lupe.
121
00:07:13,712 --> 00:07:15,047
Unless...
122
00:07:15,130 --> 00:07:16,965
- No, it's fine.
- He can stay out here.
123
00:07:17,758 --> 00:07:20,719
- Ay, qué cosa linda. Gracias.
- Claro.
124
00:07:21,386 --> 00:07:23,138
Victor made breakfast.
125
00:07:23,221 --> 00:07:25,640
He told me to relax.
Isn't he marvelous?
126
00:07:25,724 --> 00:07:28,060
Someone should take him off the market.
127
00:07:30,145 --> 00:07:31,271
- Toma, Lupe.
- Oh.
128
00:07:31,355 --> 00:07:32,606
- Good morning, Elena.
- Morning.
129
00:07:32,689 --> 00:07:34,399
Hey, I made your favorite.
130
00:07:35,067 --> 00:07:38,236
Clown face pancakes. Huh?
131
00:07:40,864 --> 00:07:43,241
Let me guess,
you don't like clowns anymore.
132
00:07:44,993 --> 00:07:46,244
Or faces.
133
00:07:47,829 --> 00:07:50,215
I just like to start with a protein
because studies show
134
00:07:50,300 --> 00:07:51,626
it's better for developing brain...
135
00:07:51,708 --> 00:07:53,835
Clown pancakes, what?
136
00:07:54,586 --> 00:07:57,130
It's about to be a circus in my stomach.
137
00:07:58,507 --> 00:08:00,509
That's what I meant to say.
138
00:08:00,592 --> 00:08:02,636
Yeah. Oh, uh...
Quick, before you go to school,
139
00:08:02,719 --> 00:08:04,971
I have something for you guys.
140
00:08:05,055 --> 00:08:07,432
I didn't get a chance
to do this last night.
141
00:08:07,516 --> 00:08:09,935
But, uh, I hope you like it, papito.
142
00:08:10,018 --> 00:08:12,104
Oh, maybe you can open that after...
Okay.
143
00:08:15,023 --> 00:08:18,568
Dang! A new PS4! Are you kidding me?
144
00:08:18,652 --> 00:08:19,778
Oh, my God. Thanks.
145
00:08:20,612 --> 00:08:22,781
Of course you can't play it
unless your homework's done
146
00:08:22,864 --> 00:08:24,274
and only when Mami says it's okay.
147
00:08:24,866 --> 00:08:28,120
And I'm just realizing I should've
asked her before I even gave it to you,
148
00:08:28,203 --> 00:08:31,415
so now I'm just gonna stare this way
and you tell me what her face is doing.
149
00:08:32,541 --> 00:08:33,583
- You can keep it.
- Yes.
150
00:08:33,667 --> 00:08:36,128
But if you mess up, it goes up
on the shelf no one can reach.
151
00:08:37,004 --> 00:08:38,880
RIP Super Soaker.
152
00:08:40,215 --> 00:08:41,591
And for Elena...
153
00:08:52,686 --> 00:08:54,604
I know that you're
a little too old for it.
154
00:08:54,688 --> 00:08:57,774
But hear me out, okay? She's a princess.
155
00:08:57,858 --> 00:09:00,569
But a Latina princess.
156
00:09:00,652 --> 00:09:03,363
Yeah.
And she's all, like, empowered.
157
00:09:03,447 --> 00:09:04,756
Yeah, she don't need no prince.
158
00:09:08,618 --> 00:09:10,454
- Okay.
- Okay.
159
00:09:10,537 --> 00:09:11,705
Thank you.
160
00:09:12,831 --> 00:09:14,499
Hi, princess. I'm Elena.
161
00:09:15,667 --> 00:09:18,837
"Hi. My body
proportions aren't representative"
162
00:09:18,920 --> 00:09:20,756
"of a typical girl my age."
163
00:09:24,092 --> 00:09:26,428
At least you know.
164
00:09:26,511 --> 00:09:30,766
Yeah. And... and she comes with a purse,
and, uh, pajamas...
165
00:09:30,849 --> 00:09:33,310
and, um, a receipt.
166
00:09:34,728 --> 00:09:37,230
Solid effort. Come on, you guys.
Let's go. You gotta go.
167
00:09:37,315 --> 00:09:38,775
We'll see you after
school at the recital.
168
00:09:38,857 --> 00:09:40,776
- Can't wait.
- I'm going to go, too.
169
00:09:40,859 --> 00:09:42,986
I will leave you two alone.
170
00:09:43,070 --> 00:09:45,614
- Where are you going?
- Grocery shopping.
171
00:09:45,697 --> 00:09:47,074
At 7:00 in the morning?
172
00:09:47,157 --> 00:09:48,408
I like to beat the traffic.
173
00:09:48,492 --> 00:09:50,786
- You're walking.
- Foot traffic.
174
00:09:52,412 --> 00:09:54,414
It must be nice to have
someone to help out,
175
00:09:54,498 --> 00:09:55,540
go grocery shopping.
176
00:09:55,624 --> 00:10:00,128
Oh, yeah. Yeah.
Without her list or her purse.
177
00:10:00,212 --> 00:10:01,380
Or leaving.
178
00:10:09,096 --> 00:10:10,764
So...
179
00:10:11,640 --> 00:10:14,434
You're making breakfast,
you're being thoughtful.
180
00:10:16,019 --> 00:10:17,020
What are you doing?
181
00:10:17,979 --> 00:10:19,648
Just trying to be a decent dude.
182
00:10:20,148 --> 00:10:22,442
I'm not the same person
I was before I left.
183
00:10:22,651 --> 00:10:25,195
I mean, I'm still crazy cute.
184
00:10:25,278 --> 00:10:29,032
But, uh, I'm off the pills. I'm
sober now. Been working a program.
185
00:10:29,116 --> 00:10:30,367
- That's great.
- Yeah.
186
00:10:30,450 --> 00:10:33,787
And the other stuff, the PTS?
I'm dealing with it.
187
00:10:33,870 --> 00:10:36,581
I'm in a good place, Lupe.
I'm a new guy.
188
00:10:37,332 --> 00:10:38,375
Trying to be, anyway.
189
00:10:38,458 --> 00:10:39,710
Good.
190
00:10:41,336 --> 00:10:42,879
Good. I'm in a good place, too.
191
00:10:44,006 --> 00:10:45,132
Which...
192
00:10:46,049 --> 00:10:48,635
Ay, so, look. So I'm just gonna
put it out there. I'm seeing somebody.
193
00:10:48,719 --> 00:10:50,721
What? Who is he?
I'm gonna kick his ass.
194
00:10:53,390 --> 00:10:55,392
Is what the old Victor would have said.
195
00:10:55,475 --> 00:10:56,852
Right? Yeah.
196
00:10:56,935 --> 00:11:00,230
But the new Victor says, "Get it, girl."
197
00:11:01,857 --> 00:11:04,192
- Okay.
- It's all good.
198
00:11:04,276 --> 00:11:06,611
I'm just telling you
because I don't want it to be weird.
199
00:11:06,695 --> 00:11:08,447
Although it was weird
that you told me to get it.
200
00:11:10,198 --> 00:11:13,201
But, uh, tonight, me
and him have a thing.
201
00:11:14,911 --> 00:11:16,747
- Okay.
- So you're cool?
202
00:11:16,830 --> 00:11:19,041
Well, I don't love it.
203
00:11:19,124 --> 00:11:21,835
I mean, who is this guy?
Is he a big part of your life?
204
00:11:22,419 --> 00:11:23,503
Hey, Pen!
205
00:11:27,674 --> 00:11:30,010
Which shirt do you think is better
for the cello recital?
206
00:11:30,093 --> 00:11:32,679
I feel like the green one
really brings out my eyes.
207
00:11:35,307 --> 00:11:36,933
But then I thought
it might be fun if we did
208
00:11:37,017 --> 00:11:39,102
a "the whole family wears blue" thing.
209
00:11:39,186 --> 00:11:40,562
Hi, I'm Victor.
210
00:11:44,608 --> 00:11:45,834
Is this the guy you're seeing?
211
00:11:48,153 --> 00:11:49,821
Oh, my God!
212
00:11:49,905 --> 00:11:52,699
- You think he and I?
- Like we would ever!
213
00:11:55,285 --> 00:11:57,579
Oh, my. Whoo! I needed that.
214
00:11:57,663 --> 00:11:59,623
Oh, man. Me, too. That was funny.
215
00:11:59,706 --> 00:12:03,210
Oh, hey, man.
I'm Schneider, by the way.
216
00:12:04,503 --> 00:12:07,464
She never told me
you were so funny.
217
00:12:07,547 --> 00:12:10,175
So you're just the guy
who takes my son out to baseball
218
00:12:10,258 --> 00:12:11,593
and does all that dad stuff?
219
00:12:15,889 --> 00:12:17,432
Are we still laughing?
220
00:12:18,266 --> 00:12:20,227
- I'm not.
- I am.
221
00:12:21,978 --> 00:12:23,981
'Cause I'm afraid to stop.
222
00:12:24,731 --> 00:12:25,983
You know what, I gotta be honest,
223
00:12:26,066 --> 00:12:28,610
I think I was happier when I thought
you were sleeping with my wife.
224
00:12:29,194 --> 00:12:30,529
Oh, sure, yeah.
225
00:12:30,612 --> 00:12:32,572
Cool, cool, cool, cool,
cool, cool, cool.
226
00:12:33,156 --> 00:12:34,232
Uh...
227
00:12:34,783 --> 00:12:37,911
I never come down here
shirtless or pantsless.
228
00:12:37,995 --> 00:12:40,622
I never come down here.
How did I get here? I'm gonna go.
229
00:12:41,832 --> 00:12:44,626
Okay. But we'll see you
at Alex's recital, right?
230
00:12:44,710 --> 00:12:46,086
Oh...
231
00:12:46,169 --> 00:12:50,382
Yeah, I just remembered I double-booked
with another middle school concert.
232
00:12:50,465 --> 00:12:53,510
Recital season, am I right?
233
00:12:54,553 --> 00:12:58,015
Schneider. Come on, don't be ridiculous.
Of course you're coming.
234
00:12:58,098 --> 00:13:00,934
You'll both be there, and it'll be
a good chance to get to know each other.
235
00:13:01,018 --> 00:13:03,103
Yeah. Come on, man.
236
00:13:03,186 --> 00:13:05,647
You should come. I insist.
237
00:13:08,150 --> 00:13:09,318
Sounds fun.
238
00:13:11,528 --> 00:13:14,406
♪ Strangers in the night ♪
239
00:13:15,699 --> 00:13:19,036
♪ Exchanging glances ♪
240
00:13:19,119 --> 00:13:21,413
♪ Wondering in the night ♪
241
00:13:21,496 --> 00:13:23,665
♪ What were the chances ♪
242
00:13:23,749 --> 00:13:26,460
♪ We'd be sharing love ♪
243
00:13:27,586 --> 00:13:30,047
Oh, man. These people really need
better entertainment.
244
00:13:30,130 --> 00:13:32,424
Or worse hearing aids.
245
00:13:33,383 --> 00:13:34,926
Look at you two,
246
00:13:35,010 --> 00:13:39,139
all over each other
like the old days.
247
00:13:39,222 --> 00:13:44,895
Remember, love is the thing
that keeps you warm in the night.
248
00:13:44,978 --> 00:13:47,481
It is the quilt of passion.
249
00:13:47,564 --> 00:13:49,316
Keep walking, viejo.
250
00:13:54,363 --> 00:13:56,031
What...
251
00:13:56,114 --> 00:13:58,575
What happened to
love is the quilt of passion?
252
00:13:58,659 --> 00:14:00,285
Yeah, that quilt is too old.
253
00:14:05,290 --> 00:14:06,458
Are you okay there, buddy?
254
00:14:06,541 --> 00:14:08,293
Yep, yep, yep.
255
00:14:08,377 --> 00:14:11,630
Glad to be here as a family acquaintance
to support your son.
256
00:14:11,713 --> 00:14:15,133
What's his name? Alvin?
I don't know. We're not that close.
257
00:14:15,926 --> 00:14:19,721
Hey, great job coaching
Alex's swing this season.
258
00:14:19,805 --> 00:14:22,265
Widening his stance really made him
a monster at the plate.
259
00:14:22,349 --> 00:14:23,558
You must be so proud.
260
00:14:26,978 --> 00:14:28,438
He lives here.
261
00:14:31,149 --> 00:14:33,986
Early onset dementia. Sad.
262
00:14:36,029 --> 00:14:39,491
Listen, man, relax.
It's good, what you're doing for Alex.
263
00:14:39,574 --> 00:14:41,251
I'm not around.
You should keep doing it.
264
00:14:42,285 --> 00:14:44,871
Although I won't be
over there much longer.
265
00:14:44,955 --> 00:14:46,373
- You won't?
- Nah.
266
00:14:46,456 --> 00:14:48,417
Private security in Afghanistan?
267
00:14:48,500 --> 00:14:51,336
I mean, it's not exactly the kind of job
you can grow old in.
268
00:14:51,420 --> 00:14:53,446
Yeah, I know. That's what I
said when you went over.
269
00:14:53,630 --> 00:14:55,507
Yeah. You were right.
270
00:14:57,342 --> 00:14:59,636
- Mom.
- What? What's wrong?
271
00:14:59,720 --> 00:15:02,472
Mrs. Aaron's van got a flat,
and she was moving all the instruments.
272
00:15:02,556 --> 00:15:03,890
I don't have my cello.
273
00:15:03,974 --> 00:15:06,059
I don't have my Jell-O either.
274
00:15:11,982 --> 00:15:13,108
This sucks.
275
00:15:14,526 --> 00:15:15,736
Bad news, everyone.
276
00:15:15,819 --> 00:15:18,030
No recital today.
277
00:15:18,113 --> 00:15:20,407
I really wanted to show you
in front of everybody.
278
00:15:20,907 --> 00:15:22,659
You never get to be here for my stuff.
279
00:15:23,410 --> 00:15:25,412
- We have to do something.
- What do you mean?
280
00:15:25,495 --> 00:15:28,582
We gotta stall. I didn't come all this
way to not hear my boy play the cello.
281
00:15:29,499 --> 00:15:31,209
Schneider, I have a mission for you.
282
00:15:31,793 --> 00:15:33,356
I need you to locate and recover that
283
00:15:33,381 --> 00:15:35,196
van, and retrieve those
instruments ASAP.
284
00:15:35,255 --> 00:15:37,049
You got it, Dad. I mean, dude.
285
00:15:37,132 --> 00:15:38,984
I mean...
I'm not looking for a father figure.
286
00:15:41,445 --> 00:15:43,063
All right, we need a diversion
until they get back.
287
00:15:43,147 --> 00:15:44,389
Are you in, Sergeant Alvarez?
288
00:15:45,265 --> 00:15:46,933
What do you have in mind,
Sergeant Alvarez?
289
00:15:47,017 --> 00:15:49,336
All right, everyone, uh,
before you all leave,
290
00:15:49,419 --> 00:15:51,396
I happened to notice
your karaoke machine.
291
00:15:51,480 --> 00:15:54,066
And we have a very special guest
who's played...
292
00:15:54,149 --> 00:15:57,402
showers from Echo Park to Afghanistan,
293
00:15:57,486 --> 00:15:59,446
Penelope Alvarez!
294
00:15:59,529 --> 00:16:01,490
You got this. Let's give them a show.
295
00:16:01,573 --> 00:16:03,033
♪ Turn around ♪
296
00:16:03,116 --> 00:16:06,203
♪ Every now and then
I get a little bit lonely ♪
297
00:16:06,286 --> 00:16:08,497
♪ And you're never coming round ♪
298
00:16:08,580 --> 00:16:09,665
♪ Turn around ♪
299
00:16:09,748 --> 00:16:13,585
You know, I should be embarrassed,
but Mom and Dad are kinda cute up there.
300
00:16:14,920 --> 00:16:17,047
- I did this.
- ♪ Turn around ♪
301
00:16:18,590 --> 00:16:22,219
♪ A total eclipse of the heart ♪
302
00:16:22,302 --> 00:16:25,430
♪ Turn around bright eyes ♪
303
00:16:25,514 --> 00:16:28,684
♪ Turn around bright eyes ♪
304
00:16:28,767 --> 00:16:33,397
Whoo-hoo! Thank you, active
seniors of Silver Lake!
305
00:16:35,691 --> 00:16:37,526
Do you want to hear it a fourth time?
306
00:16:37,609 --> 00:16:39,611
I didn't hear it the first three times.
307
00:16:41,279 --> 00:16:43,198
Oh, and now,
I couldn't be prouder to introduce
308
00:16:43,281 --> 00:16:47,202
the St. Bibiana String Quartet,
starring cello superstar, Alex Alvarez.
309
00:16:59,756 --> 00:17:01,591
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
310
00:17:07,431 --> 00:17:09,433
You glad you came back early for this?
311
00:17:10,809 --> 00:17:12,219
We messed up on a lot, but, uh...
312
00:17:12,853 --> 00:17:14,855
I know a couple of things we got right.
313
00:17:24,865 --> 00:17:26,700
Whoo-hoo!
314
00:17:26,783 --> 00:17:28,160
Oh!
315
00:17:28,243 --> 00:17:30,287
We were so awesome!
316
00:17:30,370 --> 00:17:31,663
Wow. Yeah.
317
00:17:31,747 --> 00:17:34,666
I mean, we probably added five years
to those old-timers' lives.
318
00:17:35,334 --> 00:17:38,253
And papito,
you were the best one in that quartet.
319
00:17:38,337 --> 00:17:40,464
I mean, that's why they gave you
the biggest violin.
320
00:17:41,340 --> 00:17:43,884
Thanks. Can we set up the PS4 now?
321
00:17:43,967 --> 00:17:45,594
I don't know. What do you say, Mamita?
322
00:17:47,304 --> 00:17:49,473
- Yes.
- Great. Oh, uh, but first...
323
00:17:49,556 --> 00:17:51,016
I have something for Elena.
324
00:17:51,725 --> 00:17:54,394
- Ooh.
- Um, yeah, I'm sorry about the doll.
325
00:17:54,478 --> 00:17:56,229
Uh, I know sometimes I still think
326
00:17:56,313 --> 00:17:58,065
that you're a little girl.
But you've changed.
327
00:17:58,148 --> 00:18:01,234
And I haven't been so good at
keeping up. But I want to.
328
00:18:05,530 --> 00:18:08,742
A donation to Kiva... in my name!
329
00:18:08,825 --> 00:18:10,744
Why are you giving money
to a guy named Kiva
330
00:18:10,827 --> 00:18:14,122
when you could be giving money
to a guy named Alex?
331
00:18:14,623 --> 00:18:17,125
Oh, Kiva is an organization
that gives a loan to a small business
332
00:18:17,209 --> 00:18:19,419
in a developing nation. They're amazing!
333
00:18:19,503 --> 00:18:21,129
How did you know I would like this?
334
00:18:21,214 --> 00:18:22,382
Well, I did a little research.
335
00:18:22,464 --> 00:18:24,800
And, uh, well, somebody told
me you were... What was it?
336
00:18:24,883 --> 00:18:26,093
Annoying.
337
00:18:29,554 --> 00:18:31,306
A... a social justice warrior.
338
00:18:31,390 --> 00:18:32,474
Same thing.
339
00:18:34,643 --> 00:18:36,812
Anyway, I don't know exactly
how this works,
340
00:18:36,895 --> 00:18:39,356
but if we're ever in Tibet,
we can visit a kickass yak dairy.
341
00:18:39,439 --> 00:18:41,942
Thanks, Papi!
342
00:18:42,025 --> 00:18:43,902
But we're still sharing that PS4.
343
00:18:43,986 --> 00:18:46,029
I like video games, too.
Girls like video games, too.
344
00:18:46,113 --> 00:18:47,531
Don't you even.
345
00:18:49,116 --> 00:18:52,202
I'm in, too.
I wanna Dance Dance Revolution.
346
00:18:52,953 --> 00:18:54,371
Don't you have a dinner thing?
347
00:18:56,790 --> 00:18:58,083
Oh, that's right.
348
00:18:58,166 --> 00:19:00,585
Aw, it's true love.
349
00:19:00,669 --> 00:19:04,006
I'm sure Juliet forgot
her date with Romeo.
350
00:19:04,798 --> 00:19:05,924
Aw.
351
00:19:08,468 --> 00:19:10,220
Okay. Let me get outta here.
352
00:19:10,929 --> 00:19:12,889
- And I'll see you guys later.
- Bye, Mom.
353
00:19:12,973 --> 00:19:14,808
- Bye.
- Okay, let's do it.
354
00:19:14,891 --> 00:19:16,018
I'm gonna beat you, Papi.
355
00:19:16,101 --> 00:19:17,728
Just like I used to beat you
in Connect Four.
356
00:19:17,811 --> 00:19:18,854
Ooh.
357
00:19:18,937 --> 00:19:20,439
Tough talk, huh, papito?
358
00:19:20,522 --> 00:19:22,230
I actually got called
to duty, so there's
359
00:19:22,255 --> 00:19:23,758
no way you can beat me at this game.
360
00:19:23,817 --> 00:19:26,445
And Elena, you can't cheat
in this game like you do in Scrabble.
361
00:19:26,528 --> 00:19:29,072
For the last time,
seax is a real word.
362
00:19:29,156 --> 00:19:31,450
It's a Scandinavian roofer's tool.
363
00:19:31,533 --> 00:19:33,827
Wow.
You make Papi feel real dumb sometimes.
364
00:19:35,704 --> 00:19:37,789
All right, let's
set this thing up, guys.
365
00:19:39,791 --> 00:19:41,460
Lupe, one sec.
366
00:19:44,254 --> 00:19:45,380
Tonight was fun, right?
367
00:19:45,464 --> 00:19:48,759
Yeah. It was nice to have someone
to share the load.
368
00:19:48,842 --> 00:19:51,845
Listen, I... I hope we're on our way
to being good, you know,
369
00:19:51,928 --> 00:19:53,347
which is why I got a
present for you, too.
370
00:20:01,855 --> 00:20:03,732
- The divorce papers.
- Yeah.
371
00:20:03,815 --> 00:20:06,610
I know you've been after me
to sign them, so I did.
372
00:20:06,693 --> 00:20:08,695
Once you do, it'll be official.
373
00:20:10,447 --> 00:20:12,324
Ay. Wow.
374
00:20:18,330 --> 00:20:19,373
Thank you.
375
00:20:58,787 --> 00:21:00,247
Have fun at your thing.
376
00:21:07,671 --> 00:21:09,631
- That was great, wasn't it?
- Oh, so great.
377
00:21:09,715 --> 00:21:11,466
I absolutely loved your friends.
378
00:21:11,550 --> 00:21:13,844
I can't believe that Emily and I went
to the same grade school.
379
00:21:13,927 --> 00:21:15,971
And we both mistrust the balloon guy
at the farmer's market,
380
00:21:16,054 --> 00:21:17,639
'cause that guy is full-on sketchy.
381
00:21:18,932 --> 00:21:22,853
Sebastian and Peter are so cute.
Their wedding pictures were so romantic.
382
00:21:22,936 --> 00:21:25,272
Love wins! We have to break up.
383
00:21:29,276 --> 00:21:30,902
Are you intimidated
by Sebastian and Peter?
384
00:21:30,986 --> 00:21:32,738
They have their problems, too, you know.
385
00:21:32,821 --> 00:21:35,699
I've seen Peter fat-shame Sebastian.
It's not pretty.
386
00:21:36,700 --> 00:21:37,909
It's not that.
387
00:21:38,952 --> 00:21:43,040
I just have a lot
going on right now, you know.
388
00:21:43,123 --> 00:21:47,169
Between the quinces,
my family coming into town,
389
00:21:47,252 --> 00:21:48,837
my ex being back...
390
00:21:50,422 --> 00:21:51,840
It's not fair to you.
391
00:21:53,925 --> 00:21:57,054
If I can't be here, I shouldn't be here.
392
00:21:58,847 --> 00:22:00,766
Yeah. Yeah.
393
00:22:02,392 --> 00:22:04,227
And your ex being back.
394
00:22:08,815 --> 00:22:10,692
It's okay.
395
00:22:10,776 --> 00:22:11,818
I get it.
396
00:22:15,238 --> 00:22:18,950
So... we're stopping after six dates.
397
00:22:20,077 --> 00:22:21,119
Perfect!
398
00:23:10,127 --> 00:23:12,379
You watching me sleep, creepy lady?
399
00:23:16,800 --> 00:23:19,553
I should've known something was up.
You weren't snoring.
400
00:23:19,636 --> 00:23:21,930
How was your thing?
401
00:23:23,056 --> 00:23:24,349
It was fine.
402
00:23:25,350 --> 00:23:27,936
Home by 11:00? I don't think so.
403
00:23:28,895 --> 00:23:32,190
Why are you with such a snooze, huh?
We know you have good taste.
404
00:23:33,650 --> 00:23:34,735
Ay.
405
00:23:35,527 --> 00:23:37,904
Well, if you must know,
I broke up with him.
406
00:23:38,905 --> 00:23:40,490
Oh, no.
407
00:23:41,575 --> 00:23:42,826
Stop smiling.
408
00:23:43,410 --> 00:23:46,163
Was I smiling?
You better look closer.
409
00:23:46,246 --> 00:23:48,132
No, no, no, no.
Come on, no. None of that.
410
00:23:48,215 --> 00:23:49,791
Come on, I swear, I just wanna spoon.
411
00:23:49,875 --> 00:23:51,251
Oh, yeah.
412
00:23:52,419 --> 00:23:54,087
You just wanna spoon?
413
00:23:55,130 --> 00:23:57,174
I invented that move.
414
00:23:57,257 --> 00:24:00,802
Come on, let's just cuddle, naked.
415
00:24:00,886 --> 00:24:02,512
Nothing can happen.
416
00:24:03,764 --> 00:24:05,807
And then nothing turned into Elena.
417
00:24:08,310 --> 00:24:10,395
Come on. Just for a minute.
418
00:24:36,254 --> 00:24:38,465
So, thanks for the divorce papers.
419
00:24:41,259 --> 00:24:44,137
Yeah, I can't wait
to get you outta my life.
420
00:24:45,347 --> 00:24:48,016
Oh, God, it's just so weird.
421
00:24:48,100 --> 00:24:51,937
Mami's convinced
that we should get back together.
422
00:24:52,020 --> 00:24:54,773
Ah, that viejita's no dummy.
423
00:25:08,036 --> 00:25:09,788
- What?
- Why do you smell like beer?
424
00:25:11,498 --> 00:25:13,709
Oh, uh, I had a few before bed.
425
00:25:14,376 --> 00:25:16,670
Okay.
426
00:25:16,753 --> 00:25:20,215
Uh, I mean, what do we do?
We call your sponsor, right?
427
00:25:20,298 --> 00:25:23,051
I mean, is he in Afghanistan? Here?
What? Where is he?
428
00:25:23,135 --> 00:25:24,386
- No. No, no, no, no.
- Yeah!
429
00:25:24,469 --> 00:25:26,930
'Cause that's part of
working the program, right?
430
00:25:27,014 --> 00:25:29,391
Look, it's not that kind of program.
All right?
431
00:25:29,474 --> 00:25:31,184
What the hell kind of program is it,
Victor?
432
00:25:31,268 --> 00:25:33,186
Okay, look,
you're gonna have to trust me on this.
433
00:25:33,270 --> 00:25:36,481
All right? I'm doing my own thing.
And it... And it's working. I promise.
434
00:25:37,482 --> 00:25:39,026
Yeah, it seems like it's working.
435
00:25:39,109 --> 00:25:43,363
Uh, listen, Penelope. Okay, look,
I'm off the pills, all right?
436
00:25:43,447 --> 00:25:45,574
And honestly, if I feel like having
a couple of Coronas
437
00:25:45,657 --> 00:25:47,868
at the end of the day
to take the edge off, that's...
438
00:25:47,951 --> 00:25:50,704
that's a hell of a lot better
than when I'd pop a fistful of Vicodin
439
00:25:50,787 --> 00:25:53,665
and watch 17 hours of HGTV.
440
00:25:53,749 --> 00:25:55,375
Though I now know what a sconce is.
441
00:25:55,459 --> 00:25:59,296
Don't joke about this!
You lied to me!
442
00:25:59,379 --> 00:26:01,807
No, I didn't lie, okay?
I told you that I'm better and I am.
443
00:26:01,890 --> 00:26:03,367
You're not gonna give
me credit for that?
444
00:26:03,370 --> 00:26:04,286
No, I'm not.
445
00:26:04,380 --> 00:26:07,150
No. Not with your history,
and not what we've been through.
446
00:26:07,220 --> 00:26:09,389
You need to be in a real program.
447
00:26:09,473 --> 00:26:11,016
Oh, what, at the VA?
448
00:26:11,099 --> 00:26:13,226
So I can wait a month
to talk to some comemierda
449
00:26:13,310 --> 00:26:14,811
who's never even seen
a second of combat?
450
00:26:14,895 --> 00:26:16,271
No, I don't think so.
I'm not doing that.
451
00:26:16,355 --> 00:26:18,240
Oh, so... so just to be clear...
452
00:26:18,323 --> 00:26:20,108
you're not seeing anyone about your PTS?
453
00:26:20,192 --> 00:26:23,287
Look, I'm doing stuff, okay?
Look, I'm keeping busy. I'm working out.
454
00:26:23,370 --> 00:26:24,613
- Oh, God.
- All right?
455
00:26:24,696 --> 00:26:27,157
I can't believe
I let you do this to me again.
456
00:26:27,240 --> 00:26:29,159
Stop!
Stop overreacting over a few beers.
457
00:26:29,242 --> 00:26:30,911
- Overreacting?
- Please!
458
00:26:30,994 --> 00:26:34,131
How many beers was it when you punched
a hole in the wall above the bed, huh?
459
00:26:34,923 --> 00:26:36,008
How many beers was it
460
00:26:36,091 --> 00:26:37,626
when you woke the kids up
in the middle of the night
461
00:26:37,709 --> 00:26:39,711
to say goodbye
'cause Daddy was gonna kill himself?
462
00:26:39,795 --> 00:26:40,796
Huh?
463
00:26:42,798 --> 00:26:45,759
I'm not saying this to hurt you.
464
00:26:45,842 --> 00:26:48,470
I am saying this because I love you...
465
00:26:50,138 --> 00:26:52,808
and I know who you are in here.
466
00:26:52,891 --> 00:26:55,268
I remember who you were.
467
00:26:55,352 --> 00:26:57,312
You've been through
some hard stuff, babe,
468
00:26:57,396 --> 00:27:00,190
and... and that's not your fault,
but you need real help.
469
00:27:00,273 --> 00:27:01,608
I'm helping myself!
470
00:27:02,109 --> 00:27:03,360
I'm doing what I'm doing, okay?
471
00:27:03,443 --> 00:27:05,487
And if you don't like it,
well, then, that's your problem.
472
00:27:10,784 --> 00:27:13,120
Yeah, you're right. That is my problem.
473
00:27:13,203 --> 00:27:15,747
And I can't have that problem here
with the kids. So, you gotta go.
474
00:27:16,498 --> 00:27:17,708
Stay at that hotel.
475
00:27:17,791 --> 00:27:21,336
And the next time I see you
is gonna be at Elena's quinces.
476
00:27:21,420 --> 00:27:23,255
- All right. Hey, look, I'm... I'm sorry.
- No!
477
00:27:23,338 --> 00:27:24,589
- Come on, Lupe.
- Please!
478
00:27:25,590 --> 00:27:26,717
Just go.
479
00:27:30,053 --> 00:27:31,054
Okay.
480
00:27:43,400 --> 00:27:45,736
Lydia. Lydia, háblale. Por favor.
481
00:27:46,903 --> 00:27:47,963
Huh?
482
00:27:49,031 --> 00:27:50,991
No, Victor.
483
00:27:52,826 --> 00:27:53,910
Go.
484
00:28:27,775 --> 00:28:29,775
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