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1
00:00:04,799 --> 00:00:07,200
Last season on "Velma"...
2
00:00:07,280 --> 00:00:10,720
- The serial killer is...
- Victoria Jones?
3
00:00:11,839 --> 00:00:14,599
It's not Victoria.
She told me she's been possessed
4
00:00:14,679 --> 00:00:17,160
by the ghost of Dr. Edna Perdue.
5
00:00:17,719 --> 00:00:18,920
I love you.
6
00:00:20,359 --> 00:00:22,719
- I love you too, Norville.
- Norville?
7
00:00:29,679 --> 00:00:31,519
Mother? Hello?
8
00:00:42,640 --> 00:00:46,119
Another thing Velma was right about.
No such thing as ghosts.
9
00:00:47,280 --> 00:00:48,600
Hello?
10
00:00:58,280 --> 00:01:00,159
My name is Velma Dinkley.
11
00:01:00,240 --> 00:01:03,679
And three weeks ago,
I caught my first serial killer.
12
00:01:04,239 --> 00:01:06,719
Did the experience change me?
Yes.
13
00:01:07,040 --> 00:01:09,079
I'm more confident
in my mystery solving.
14
00:01:09,560 --> 00:01:10,879
I know someone's out there,
15
00:01:10,959 --> 00:01:14,359
and if you give me six to ten weeks
to investigate, I'll figure out who.
16
00:01:14,439 --> 00:01:16,159
Though, I'm also pretty jumpy.
17
00:01:16,239 --> 00:01:18,560
Ah, don't kill me! I'm about to attend
a super cool party
18
00:01:18,640 --> 00:01:19,640
and I'm not even crashing.
19
00:01:19,719 --> 00:01:21,680
Velma, relax. It's just me.
20
00:01:21,760 --> 00:01:25,000
And word of advice,
saying a party is cool is not cool.
21
00:01:25,079 --> 00:01:26,959
Now, come on, give me your hand.
The party's this way.
22
00:01:27,040 --> 00:01:29,239
Unfortunately,
catching a serial killer
23
00:01:29,319 --> 00:01:32,799
has taught me nothing about solving
the mystery of teen romance.
24
00:01:32,879 --> 00:01:36,239
So this is where the popular kids party
in the woods.
25
00:01:36,319 --> 00:01:38,599
I give myself ten minutes
before I'm asked to leave.
26
00:01:38,680 --> 00:01:40,400
Velma, no one's gonna
ask you to leave.
27
00:01:40,480 --> 00:01:43,120
As crazy as this sounds,
you're popular now.
28
00:01:43,200 --> 00:01:44,840
You saved the life
of every girl here.
29
00:01:44,920 --> 00:01:48,680
I guess. Still, it just feels weird.
I'm so glad you're here.
30
00:01:48,760 --> 00:01:49,879
Me too.
31
00:01:51,959 --> 00:01:55,159
Now, you go in first.
I don't want to arrive as a couple
32
00:01:55,239 --> 00:01:58,840
and then have to spend the whole party
explaining to people we're not...
33
00:01:58,920 --> 00:02:00,480
What? But I thought...
You just held my hand.
34
00:02:00,560 --> 00:02:03,799
- It was romantic as hell.
- No, it wasn't. It was practical.
35
00:02:03,879 --> 00:02:05,959
I didn't want you stepping
on all the broken glass
36
00:02:06,040 --> 00:02:07,319
and used condoms out here.
37
00:02:07,400 --> 00:02:08,879
Why can't you just admit
you want to be together?
38
00:02:08,960 --> 00:02:13,240
Because you told Norville you loved him
right in front of me.
39
00:02:13,319 --> 00:02:15,120
And I've told you
that was an accident,
40
00:02:15,199 --> 00:02:18,400
literally seven times
and figuratively, a billion times.
41
00:02:18,479 --> 00:02:20,439
It just feels so farfetched.
42
00:02:20,520 --> 00:02:23,080
Norville's your best friend
and you have that special bond
43
00:02:23,159 --> 00:02:24,840
from all your weird
AP nerd classes.
44
00:02:24,919 --> 00:02:27,280
Yes, but you were
my first best friend, Daphne.
45
00:02:27,360 --> 00:02:29,240
And best friends
trust each other.
46
00:02:29,319 --> 00:02:33,120
So, I'm asking you to trust me that
I told Norville I loved him on accident.
47
00:02:33,199 --> 00:02:35,400
Nay, I'm begging you.
48
00:02:37,199 --> 00:02:38,560
Oh, God! Look!
49
00:02:39,120 --> 00:02:40,479
It's Sheriff Cogburn!
50
00:02:53,319 --> 00:02:56,120
What do you mean you need
to exhume my mother's body?
51
00:02:56,199 --> 00:02:57,879
Seriously, I don't know
what that means.
52
00:02:57,960 --> 00:03:00,520
It means, I wanna dig her up
and make sure she's truly dead.
53
00:03:00,599 --> 00:03:04,120
In horror movies, killers always return
three to ten times, and I...
54
00:03:04,199 --> 00:03:06,439
We're not opening up
Fred's mom's grave, Velma.
55
00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:09,960
It's disrespectful and more importantly,
it's expensive.
56
00:03:10,039 --> 00:03:13,439
Expensive? Use the money
you don't pay me to do your job.
57
00:03:13,520 --> 00:03:16,120
Cogburn's murder three weeks
after I caught Victoria
58
00:03:16,199 --> 00:03:17,240
cannot be a coincidence.
59
00:03:17,319 --> 00:03:19,039
My mom wasn't a serial killer!
60
00:03:19,120 --> 00:03:21,599
She was possessed by the ghost
of Norville's grandmother.
61
00:03:21,680 --> 00:03:23,360
How is that so hard
to understand?
62
00:03:23,840 --> 00:03:24,960
This is useless.
63
00:03:25,039 --> 00:03:28,080
I can't believe your moms
won't dig up one stupid grave.
64
00:03:28,159 --> 00:03:30,439
If Victoria's back,
we're at the top of her list.
65
00:03:30,520 --> 00:03:32,800
Velma, Victoria is dead.
66
00:03:32,879 --> 00:03:35,360
We saw her get impaled
by a stalactite.
67
00:03:35,439 --> 00:03:37,960
I've also seen a picture
of Victoria's original nose.
68
00:03:38,039 --> 00:03:39,520
She has the money
to fix anything.
69
00:03:39,599 --> 00:03:41,159
And with all due respect
to your moms,
70
00:03:41,240 --> 00:03:43,280
if I don't solve
Cogburn's murder, who will?
71
00:03:43,360 --> 00:03:44,560
Excuse me!
72
00:03:44,639 --> 00:03:47,000
- I have solved Cogburn's murder.
- What?
73
00:03:47,080 --> 00:03:49,680
In my three weeks
as a spooky stuff hunter,
74
00:03:49,759 --> 00:03:51,879
I have never seen
an easier case.
75
00:03:51,960 --> 00:03:54,439
{\an8}The ghost of Norville's
grandma has struck again.
76
00:03:54,520 --> 00:03:56,800
{\an8}Fortunately, this
time I'm ready
77
00:03:56,879 --> 00:04:00,479
{\an8}'cause Freddy's partnered up
with another smoking hot white dude.
78
00:04:01,000 --> 00:04:02,240
Jesus.
79
00:04:04,599 --> 00:04:06,840
And yet another reason
I have to investigate.
80
00:04:06,919 --> 00:04:09,400
I can't have this town
thinking ghosts commit crimes.
81
00:04:09,479 --> 00:04:12,039
You can say that again.
Ghosts committing crimes?
82
00:04:12,120 --> 00:04:14,240
That guy's a bigger fraud
than the tummy tea industry.
83
00:04:14,319 --> 00:04:15,879
Thank you,
mysterious stranger.
84
00:04:15,960 --> 00:04:17,839
So nice to meet
a fellow rationalist.
85
00:04:17,920 --> 00:04:19,680
What brings you
to our grisly crime scene?
86
00:04:19,759 --> 00:04:22,560
Well, I'm Amber and I just
moved here with my mom.
87
00:04:22,639 --> 00:04:24,360
She's opening
an occult bookstore in town.
88
00:04:24,439 --> 00:04:27,040
- A what?
- Amber's our friend Thorne's kid.
89
00:04:27,120 --> 00:04:30,879
They sent that pentagram note that
made us all gasp on our front stoop.
90
00:04:30,959 --> 00:04:32,720
I was in a band
called The Hex Girls.
91
00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:35,040
We were a real hardcore,
witchy goth act.
92
00:04:35,120 --> 00:04:38,240
But now it's time to hang up the old
choker and try something more stable.
93
00:04:38,319 --> 00:04:40,360
And that something
is occult books?
94
00:04:40,439 --> 00:04:43,319
- But you look so cool, Amber.
- The universe is a mysterious place.
95
00:04:43,399 --> 00:04:46,000
And what's cooler than helping
people find answers?
96
00:04:46,079 --> 00:04:49,040
The universe is not mysterious.
It's governed by physics.
97
00:04:49,120 --> 00:04:50,759
- Classical or quantum?
- Both.
98
00:04:50,839 --> 00:04:53,079
But the classical model
can't support quantum theory.
99
00:04:53,160 --> 00:04:55,879
Okay, yes. So, technically,
that's mysterious, but...
100
00:04:55,959 --> 00:04:57,879
But nothing. If physics doesn't
have all the answers,
101
00:04:57,959 --> 00:04:59,720
why not at least
consider other ideas?
102
00:04:59,800 --> 00:05:03,079
Wow, Amber. I've never heard anyone
beat Velma in an argument.
103
00:05:03,160 --> 00:05:06,040
She didn't beat me. I'm just slowly
formulating a response.
104
00:05:06,120 --> 00:05:08,040
You got your ass handed to you.
105
00:05:08,120 --> 00:05:09,759
Okay. You know what? Forget this.
106
00:05:09,839 --> 00:05:12,399
There's been a murder and the only
person who can help me solve it
107
00:05:12,480 --> 00:05:14,240
is my old faithful Norville.
108
00:05:15,199 --> 00:05:16,480
Norville?
109
00:05:17,120 --> 00:05:18,720
"Norville, please respond to this."
110
00:05:18,800 --> 00:05:19,920
"I think Victoria is back."
111
00:05:20,000 --> 00:05:22,160
"My mom won't let me investigate,
so I need your help."
112
00:05:22,240 --> 00:05:24,399
"And if you've been ignoring me
because I told you I love you,"
113
00:05:24,480 --> 00:05:26,040
"and then said it was an accident,"
114
00:05:26,120 --> 00:05:28,319
"even more reason to talk.
I miss you, my friend."
115
00:05:29,720 --> 00:05:31,879
{\an8}Nah, delete.
Hey, text me back, dude.
116
00:05:33,519 --> 00:05:35,720
Is that Mr. Swendig?
What's he doing here?
117
00:05:35,800 --> 00:05:39,199
Velma, do not embarrass yourself.
He's just a brilliant biology teacher
118
00:05:39,279 --> 00:05:42,240
who could get you an internship
at any criminology lab you want.
119
00:05:42,319 --> 00:05:44,560
Mr. S? What's your
internship doing here?
120
00:05:44,639 --> 00:05:47,279
I thought you weren't back from
sabbatical until internship.
121
00:05:47,360 --> 00:05:48,800
- Not bad, Velma.
- Velma!
122
00:05:48,879 --> 00:05:50,600
Is that you,
or have kids wised up
123
00:05:50,680 --> 00:05:53,319
and started copying your brilliant mix
of brains and bangs?
124
00:05:54,879 --> 00:05:56,199
Oh, Mr. S.
125
00:05:57,040 --> 00:05:59,360
If memory serves,
this laughter can last a while,
126
00:05:59,439 --> 00:06:00,560
so I'll just continue.
127
00:06:00,639 --> 00:06:03,560
I'm here getting my teaching job back,
as my sabbatical is over.
128
00:06:03,639 --> 00:06:05,399
I'd actually love
to tell you about it,
129
00:06:05,480 --> 00:06:07,560
and you can tell me
about all that happened
130
00:06:07,639 --> 00:06:09,079
to you and your lovely mother.
131
00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:10,800
We used to have flirty conversations
132
00:06:10,879 --> 00:06:12,240
about whether
you should be medicated.
133
00:06:12,319 --> 00:06:14,279
Better times, Mr. S.
Better times.
134
00:06:14,360 --> 00:06:16,519
But we can talk about it
in biology class tomorrow.
135
00:06:16,600 --> 00:06:17,839
Internship!
136
00:06:17,920 --> 00:06:19,920
Definitely should be medicated.
137
00:06:23,000 --> 00:06:24,639
You!
138
00:06:24,720 --> 00:06:26,480
Just take a bite, Norville,
and he'll be gone.
139
00:06:29,720 --> 00:06:31,120
Someone has the munchies.
140
00:06:31,199 --> 00:06:34,120
Totally. I'm totally not stress eating
because I killed Fred's mom.
141
00:06:34,639 --> 00:06:36,879
Accidentally killed Fred's mom, son.
142
00:06:36,959 --> 00:06:39,079
You have to forgive yourself
and more importantly
143
00:06:39,160 --> 00:06:41,639
smoke all that weed
I gave you. It helps.
144
00:06:41,720 --> 00:06:44,360
I so am.
I smoke so much,
145
00:06:44,439 --> 00:06:46,360
people think I'm
from Northern California.
146
00:06:46,439 --> 00:06:48,319
Good.
I hate watching you suffer.
147
00:06:48,399 --> 00:06:51,120
And blazing a fat one
really helps me with that.
148
00:06:51,199 --> 00:06:53,600
I still can't get the blood
out of your V-neck, sweetie.
149
00:06:53,680 --> 00:06:56,079
So I picked up this
crewneck T-shirt for you.
150
00:06:56,160 --> 00:06:59,199
Thanks, Mom. I don't know what
I'd do without you. Oh, crap!
151
00:06:59,279 --> 00:07:01,639
Oh, you don't know
what you'd do without your mom.
152
00:07:01,720 --> 00:07:03,519
Well, maybe I can paint a picture.
153
00:07:03,600 --> 00:07:05,439
Please, don't. I get it. I'm sorry.
154
00:07:05,519 --> 00:07:08,639
Because my mom's dead
because you killed her!
155
00:07:10,199 --> 00:07:13,079
Talking to yourself.
Now, I know you're high.
156
00:07:19,720 --> 00:07:22,600
Now, Fredo. This holy water
will protect you
157
00:07:22,680 --> 00:07:25,279
from the scaries
and the spookies.
158
00:07:25,360 --> 00:07:28,240
Fred, there you are.
Why are you at a church?
159
00:07:28,319 --> 00:07:29,399
Are you religious now?
160
00:07:29,480 --> 00:07:32,040
I thought rich guys only
worshipped Ayn Rand and feet.
161
00:07:32,120 --> 00:07:33,800
We do. But I had
to become Catholic
162
00:07:33,879 --> 00:07:36,639
for my spooky stuff hunting business.
Customers expect it.
163
00:07:36,720 --> 00:07:38,600
- You have customers?
- Tons.
164
00:07:38,680 --> 00:07:41,160
And in almost every
scary movie and TV show,
165
00:07:41,240 --> 00:07:43,600
spooky stuff is only scared
of crosses and holy water.
166
00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:46,160
And business is all about
giving people what they want.
167
00:07:46,240 --> 00:07:47,959
I even got my dogs on the team.
168
00:07:48,040 --> 00:07:50,279
It's a gimmick, but it works.
169
00:07:50,360 --> 00:07:52,879
- Anyway. What's up?
- I need your objective opinion.
170
00:07:52,959 --> 00:07:55,360
Do you think Velma
has feelings for Norville?
171
00:07:55,439 --> 00:07:59,800
Well, on the one hand,
I hate Norville for killing my mother.
172
00:07:59,879 --> 00:08:02,839
But on the other,
under his dorky demeanor,
173
00:08:02,920 --> 00:08:06,399
bad clothes and good grades,
he is objectively hot.
174
00:08:06,480 --> 00:08:07,920
His bone structure is insane.
175
00:08:08,360 --> 00:08:11,519
But on the third hand,
Velma's your oldest friend.
176
00:08:11,600 --> 00:08:14,680
If she says she doesn't
have feelings for him, I'd trust her.
177
00:08:14,759 --> 00:08:17,639
Fred, you're right.
That was shockingly thoughtful.
178
00:08:17,720 --> 00:08:19,319
Maybe religion actually suits you.
179
00:08:19,399 --> 00:08:22,160
Maybe. But if you wanna
make out to get back at Velma,
180
00:08:22,240 --> 00:08:23,560
I'm down for that, too.
181
00:08:27,199 --> 00:08:30,480
Okay, if no one believes me
that Victoria might still be alive,
182
00:08:30,560 --> 00:08:33,320
then I have to do the one thing
I swore I never would.
183
00:08:33,919 --> 00:08:35,519
Manual labor.
184
00:08:40,840 --> 00:08:42,000
Hello?
185
00:08:44,399 --> 00:08:45,679
Who's there?
186
00:08:55,639 --> 00:08:56,919
Where'd they go?
187
00:08:57,399 --> 00:09:00,320
Their sneaker.
Oh, I got you, sucker.
188
00:09:04,679 --> 00:09:05,840
You were attacked?
189
00:09:05,919 --> 00:09:08,360
Yes, but now I can
pull a print off their shoe
190
00:09:08,440 --> 00:09:09,600
once my mom goes to sleep.
191
00:09:09,679 --> 00:09:11,639
She made me promise I wouldn't
solve mysteries anymore.
192
00:09:12,120 --> 00:09:14,120
Mysteries?
What are you talking about?
193
00:09:14,200 --> 00:09:15,960
And don't cleverly
change the subject.
194
00:09:16,039 --> 00:09:18,399
But did I tell you
Mr. S is back?
195
00:09:18,480 --> 00:09:21,240
Oh, Mr. S?
Damn it, Velma!
196
00:09:21,320 --> 00:09:24,279
Mom, please. Solving mysteries
is not that big a deal.
197
00:09:24,360 --> 00:09:27,120
I mean, you're still writing them.
And no one's even asking you to.
198
00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:30,639
- Actually, I've stopped writing.
- Oh, no. Why?
199
00:09:30,720 --> 00:09:33,480
Because my last book almost
got your brain ripped out!
200
00:09:33,559 --> 00:09:36,200
I'm sorry, but I love you
too much to let you investigate.
201
00:09:36,279 --> 00:09:39,080
The cops can find Cogburn's killer.
No more mysteries.
202
00:09:39,159 --> 00:09:41,879
Seriously, I am gonna be
on you like brown on rice.
203
00:09:41,960 --> 00:09:43,480
The worst kind of rice.
204
00:09:45,080 --> 00:09:46,679
Okay, so, as you all know,
205
00:09:46,759 --> 00:09:49,440
the Creaky Friday school fundraiser
we planned is coming up.
206
00:09:51,360 --> 00:09:53,799
- Velma?
- Oh, sorry. Whoo!
207
00:09:53,879 --> 00:09:57,080
Velma, come on! Being popular
isn't just all partying
208
00:09:57,159 --> 00:09:59,200
and eating yogurt
on museum steps.
209
00:09:59,279 --> 00:10:01,159
There's work involved!
Focus up.
210
00:10:01,240 --> 00:10:03,360
Sorry, my mom
is watching my every move,
211
00:10:03,440 --> 00:10:06,320
but she's about to realize
her nicotine gum isn't in her purse,
212
00:10:06,399 --> 00:10:08,080
center console or bra.
213
00:10:10,159 --> 00:10:11,600
I need to go. No time to explain.
214
00:10:11,679 --> 00:10:13,679
And don't guess,
because that's solving a mystery.
215
00:10:15,360 --> 00:10:16,759
And... Go time.
216
00:10:17,519 --> 00:10:20,080
Gotcha. Now, I just need to run it
through the police database.
217
00:10:20,159 --> 00:10:22,240
We can use my mom's computer
at home.
218
00:10:22,320 --> 00:10:24,240
They're running to replace
Cogburn for sheriff,
219
00:10:24,320 --> 00:10:25,840
so they'll be out
of the house all day
220
00:10:25,919 --> 00:10:28,000
with Thorne and Amber planning
their campaign kickoff party.
221
00:10:28,080 --> 00:10:29,919
Hey, what's up
with this new Amber person?
222
00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:32,440
They seem super cool,
but I always feel safer going along
223
00:10:32,519 --> 00:10:34,159
with y'all's opinions of people.
224
00:10:34,240 --> 00:10:37,919
Amber seemed cool at first,
but is basically a boring know-it-all.
225
00:10:38,000 --> 00:10:40,519
I think we should ostracize them
until they transfer schools.
226
00:10:40,600 --> 00:10:43,480
Velma's just mad because she lost
an argument to Amber.
227
00:10:43,559 --> 00:10:45,440
Like, was destroyed.
228
00:10:45,519 --> 00:10:48,559
No, I'm mad because when Amber,
who Daphne just met,
229
00:10:48,639 --> 00:10:50,799
tells Daphne something insane,
she's amazed.
230
00:10:50,879 --> 00:10:53,000
But when I, Daphne oldest friend,
231
00:10:53,080 --> 00:10:56,120
tell Daphne something totally rational,
she's completely dismissive.
232
00:10:56,200 --> 00:10:59,840
I get that. Though, Amber does have
a certain magnetism about them.
233
00:10:59,919 --> 00:11:03,279
Also, you're right.
I have been dismissive.
234
00:11:03,360 --> 00:11:06,639
But now I believe you don't
have feelings for Norville.
235
00:11:07,600 --> 00:11:10,960
What convinced you, Daphne?
Was it my increasingly unhinged texts?
236
00:11:11,039 --> 00:11:12,200
Because I will abuse that.
237
00:11:12,279 --> 00:11:15,879
No, I just realized you're right about
friends needing to trust each other.
238
00:11:15,960 --> 00:11:17,039
That's amazing.
239
00:11:17,120 --> 00:11:19,320
And when we run the fingerprint
we can make us official
240
00:11:19,399 --> 00:11:21,039
by picking our cutesy couple name.
241
00:11:21,120 --> 00:11:23,399
I'm thinking, Velma and Daphne.
242
00:11:23,480 --> 00:11:25,440
I love it,
but come over in a bit.
243
00:11:25,519 --> 00:11:27,440
I need to hide my cats
before you arrive.
244
00:11:27,519 --> 00:11:29,360
While I've forgiven you,
they have not.
245
00:11:33,759 --> 00:11:34,840
Everything okay?
246
00:11:34,919 --> 00:11:37,799
You shouldn't be sighing like that until
you've been together at least a year.
247
00:11:37,879 --> 00:11:40,759
I don't know. All I've wanted
is to be with Daphne,
248
00:11:40,840 --> 00:11:43,320
but now that I am,
something feels off.
249
00:11:43,399 --> 00:11:46,159
Because you also told
Sonia Sotomayor that you loved her.
250
00:11:46,240 --> 00:11:48,759
No, not my precious Soso.
I'm talking about...
251
00:11:48,840 --> 00:11:50,720
Fred, please. I'm sorry!
252
00:11:50,799 --> 00:11:54,120
Norville, I will never accept
your apology for killing my mom!
253
00:11:54,200 --> 00:11:56,440
No matter how well you're
pulling off that crewneck!
254
00:11:56,519 --> 00:11:59,639
Jinx! Staircase!
To the van-mobile!
255
00:12:02,240 --> 00:12:03,279
My shoe!
256
00:12:03,840 --> 00:12:07,159
Fred, your dumb dog's destroyed
my one piece of hard evidence.
257
00:12:07,240 --> 00:12:09,960
Oh, did they? Well, maybe I'd be
more sympathetic
258
00:12:10,039 --> 00:12:13,120
if you hadn't tried
to dig up my mom last night!
259
00:12:13,200 --> 00:12:16,039
I found your shovel while kissing
her tombstone this morning.
260
00:12:16,120 --> 00:12:20,080
Now, excuse me as I go
find Cogburn's actual killer
261
00:12:20,159 --> 00:12:22,440
and keep you
from sullying mother's name.
262
00:12:22,519 --> 00:12:26,000
You just better pray the church
never teaches me attack spells.
263
00:12:28,519 --> 00:12:31,279
Norville, I know you're mad at me,
but I have to follow Fred.
264
00:12:31,360 --> 00:12:32,759
And maybe we can catch up?
265
00:12:32,840 --> 00:12:35,200
Okay. Just promise
you won't talk about anything
266
00:12:35,279 --> 00:12:37,159
that's happened to us.
267
00:12:37,799 --> 00:12:40,799
Of course. I have so many more
interesting things to talk about
268
00:12:40,879 --> 00:12:42,159
than you and me.
269
00:12:44,679 --> 00:12:46,600
So, how's it going, amigo?
270
00:12:46,679 --> 00:12:49,000
Are you ready
for our Espanol test manana?
271
00:12:49,080 --> 00:12:51,559
Okay, sorry. I can't do this.
I have to talk about us.
272
00:12:51,639 --> 00:12:52,639
Why won't you text me back?
273
00:12:53,240 --> 00:12:54,960
Velma, I have a lot going on.
274
00:12:55,039 --> 00:12:56,320
I'm not really thinking
about our dynamic.
275
00:12:56,399 --> 00:12:58,240
Nothing destroys a vibe
like killing your friend's mother.
276
00:12:58,320 --> 00:13:00,960
But Norville, you killed her
in self-defense. It was an accident.
277
00:13:01,039 --> 00:13:03,919
Velma, I'm serious. If I talk about
this, I'll start to hallucinate.
278
00:13:04,000 --> 00:13:05,000
Mother?
279
00:13:05,080 --> 00:13:08,919
Mother, why aren't you making me
walk home from my ballet recital?
280
00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:12,279
Oh, right,
because Norville killed you!
281
00:13:12,360 --> 00:13:13,559
Norville, watch out!
282
00:13:13,639 --> 00:13:16,720
I can't! My guilt is causing me
to hallucinate!
283
00:13:16,799 --> 00:13:19,320
You killed my mom,She was the bomb!
284
00:13:21,480 --> 00:13:22,960
Will laughing make them stop?
285
00:13:23,039 --> 00:13:25,720
Because I'm more of a satirist
that makes you think.
286
00:13:25,799 --> 00:13:27,559
No, stress eating is
the only thing that stops them.
287
00:13:27,639 --> 00:13:28,960
But I don't have any snacks!
288
00:13:29,039 --> 00:13:31,519
Stress eating? Maybe there's food
in your glove compartment.
289
00:13:31,600 --> 00:13:34,080
- No, Velma, stop!
- Hold, on. What's this?
290
00:13:34,159 --> 00:13:35,440
Why do you have this?
291
00:13:35,519 --> 00:13:37,600
This is the same kind of shoe
I found in the cemetery.
292
00:13:37,679 --> 00:13:38,720
Did you attack me?
293
00:13:38,799 --> 00:13:40,919
Velma, I'll explain
after you give me the snacks.
294
00:13:41,000 --> 00:13:42,639
Please! We're going to die!
295
00:13:42,720 --> 00:13:44,200
Norville. Can we keep him?
296
00:13:44,279 --> 00:13:46,840
His name is my mom
because he's dead!
297
00:13:48,039 --> 00:13:49,519
You already tried
to kill me last night.
298
00:13:49,600 --> 00:13:52,039
At least, if we both die,
I can torment you in hell.
299
00:13:52,120 --> 00:13:55,480
Velma, you're my best friend.
I need you to trust me.
300
00:13:55,559 --> 00:13:59,759
Trust you? You're right.
I don't know what I was thinking.
301
00:13:59,840 --> 00:14:02,279
Here.
But why do you have this shoe?
302
00:14:02,360 --> 00:14:04,919
Okay, so when I heard
Cogburn was murdered,
303
00:14:05,000 --> 00:14:07,720
I also wondered if Victoria had
somehow survived and killed him.
304
00:14:07,799 --> 00:14:09,159
So, I went to investigate
305
00:14:09,240 --> 00:14:11,879
because if she's alive,
I can let go of all this guilt.
306
00:14:11,960 --> 00:14:13,120
But when you were attacked,
307
00:14:13,200 --> 00:14:15,519
I hallucinated that Fred's mom
wasn't there to fix his posture.
308
00:14:15,600 --> 00:14:18,200
Mother, where are you?
My back feels weird.
309
00:14:18,759 --> 00:14:20,679
And I couldn't help you.
I'm sorry.
310
00:14:20,759 --> 00:14:24,000
But I kept your attacker's other shoe
because I thought it might help you.
311
00:14:24,080 --> 00:14:26,919
Help me feel like a jerk
for ever suspecting you?
312
00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:29,960
- No, because it's a clue.
- Right. Of course.
313
00:14:30,039 --> 00:14:33,679
Norville, I owe you a huge apology
but it'll have to wait.
314
00:14:33,759 --> 00:14:35,000
We just passed Fred's van.
315
00:14:37,440 --> 00:14:41,000
Guys, guys. It's okay.
Velma and I are good now.
316
00:14:42,720 --> 00:14:45,240
Wait. Why is there
an air mattress on my floor?
317
00:14:45,320 --> 00:14:47,840
And why are the vibes
in here so abnormally chill?
318
00:14:47,919 --> 00:14:50,919
We're moving in until my mom's
occult bookstore takes off,
319
00:14:51,000 --> 00:14:52,600
so possibly forever.
Hope that's okay.
320
00:14:52,679 --> 00:14:55,279
I'm fine with it.
But Velma is another story.
321
00:14:55,360 --> 00:14:56,559
I need to text her.
322
00:14:56,639 --> 00:14:59,200
"What's your ETA?
Do I have time to, say,
323
00:14:59,279 --> 00:15:01,360
throw an air mattress
out my window?"
324
00:15:01,440 --> 00:15:04,759
"Can't talk. I'm at funeral home
with Norville."
325
00:15:04,840 --> 00:15:06,519
She's with Norville again?
326
00:15:06,600 --> 00:15:09,039
Yeah, they left Spooner's
together the same time we did.
327
00:15:09,120 --> 00:15:10,919
- Seemed intense.
- Intense?
328
00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:13,440
It's good your moms have been
planning this campaign party for weeks
329
00:15:13,519 --> 00:15:15,000
because we got nothing
done after that.
330
00:15:15,080 --> 00:15:16,559
Planning it for weeks?
331
00:15:16,639 --> 00:15:19,320
But my moms found
Cogburn's body yesterday.
332
00:15:19,399 --> 00:15:21,720
And before that, they thought
he was on vacation
333
00:15:21,799 --> 00:15:23,120
or at a problematic rally.
334
00:15:23,200 --> 00:15:25,720
- That was their cover story.
- Cover story?
335
00:15:25,799 --> 00:15:28,559
And now I'm sensing
I've said too much, so I'm stopping.
336
00:15:31,759 --> 00:15:33,320
Today was Cogburn's funeral?
337
00:15:33,399 --> 00:15:35,600
That's weird. We didn't hear
anything about it.
338
00:15:35,679 --> 00:15:38,320
Someone didn't want us here.
There must be clues in the body.
339
00:15:38,399 --> 00:15:39,759
Help me open the casket.
340
00:15:39,840 --> 00:15:41,279
Die evil spirit!
341
00:15:41,360 --> 00:15:43,360
Oh, God!
I fell asleep in there!
342
00:15:43,440 --> 00:15:44,840
Fred? What are you
doing in there?
343
00:15:44,919 --> 00:15:47,679
I was investigating
and it's exhausting.
344
00:15:47,759 --> 00:15:50,559
Anyway, Cogburn's body was
missing from his own funeral.
345
00:15:51,279 --> 00:15:54,840
So what did your grandma's ghost
do with it, Norville?
346
00:15:54,919 --> 00:15:58,480
Fred, please, for the last time,
ghosts aren't real.
347
00:15:58,559 --> 00:16:02,600
Until the truth comes out
I will be on the war path of revenge!
348
00:16:02,679 --> 00:16:05,519
Oh, God. It's the ghost
of Sheriff Cogburn! Hide!
349
00:16:14,360 --> 00:16:17,399
I'm in here with you.
Velma. It's just me.
350
00:16:17,480 --> 00:16:19,240
Open up and let me see you!
351
00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:22,320
Step away from the casket, Merle.
352
00:16:22,399 --> 00:16:23,480
Merle? Who, Merle?
353
00:16:23,559 --> 00:16:27,840
No! Sheriff Earl Cogburn was
my identical twin brother!
354
00:16:27,919 --> 00:16:31,120
Identical? Every man over 50 looks
the same to me,
355
00:16:31,200 --> 00:16:32,799
and even I know that's not true.
356
00:16:32,879 --> 00:16:37,559
We're identical voice twins,
the rarest and closest of all twins.
357
00:16:37,639 --> 00:16:41,399
- And I demand to see the body!
- And we demand you leave.
358
00:16:41,480 --> 00:16:43,039
This is official police business.
359
00:16:43,120 --> 00:16:46,000
Meaning we can sit on it
for years and keep it from the public.
360
00:16:46,080 --> 00:16:47,159
No!
361
00:16:48,519 --> 00:16:50,120
So Cogburn has a brother?
362
00:16:50,200 --> 00:16:52,240
Yeah, I knew it wasn't a ghost.
363
00:16:52,879 --> 00:16:55,039
Cool. Yeah, me, too.
364
00:16:56,000 --> 00:16:58,919
Hey, maybe not the best time,
but about the whole
365
00:16:59,000 --> 00:17:01,279
"I love you" imbroglio,
as it were...
366
00:17:01,360 --> 00:17:04,119
Velma, look, as much as I'd love
to stop caring for you...
367
00:17:04,200 --> 00:17:06,519
No joke. It would make
my life so much better.
368
00:17:06,599 --> 00:17:07,839
I just can't.
369
00:17:09,039 --> 00:17:12,519
Which is why it's weird how little
sexual tension I'm feeling right now.
370
00:17:12,599 --> 00:17:14,799
Huh, yeah, I also feel nothing.
371
00:17:14,880 --> 00:17:17,519
Except the general weirdness
that goes with being in a coffin.
372
00:17:17,599 --> 00:17:19,559
But if I'm not secretly
pining for you,
373
00:17:19,640 --> 00:17:22,200
why am I suddenly doubting
my feelings for Daphne?
374
00:17:22,279 --> 00:17:23,920
Was she right not to trust me?
375
00:17:25,359 --> 00:17:28,319
Daphne? You didn't hear us
talking right now, did you?
376
00:17:28,400 --> 00:17:30,279
Because it wasn't me.
It was a ghost!
377
00:17:30,359 --> 00:17:34,079
No, but I think my moms killed
Sheriff Cogburn to take his job.
378
00:17:34,160 --> 00:17:36,000
Wait. So not Victoria?
379
00:17:36,559 --> 00:17:38,799
Well, at least we have a shoe
that'll tell us for sure.
380
00:17:40,200 --> 00:17:43,039
You mean, I have a shoe.
This is my case,
381
00:17:43,119 --> 00:17:47,079
and I am going to prove it's the ghost
of your grandma who did it!
382
00:17:48,279 --> 00:17:51,799
No! That whistle means
drop it.
383
00:17:51,880 --> 00:17:54,319
Maybe solving mysteries
with dogs is a mistake.
384
00:17:56,559 --> 00:17:59,640
So your moms killed Cogburn
in order to take his job.
385
00:17:59,720 --> 00:18:01,119
But why hide his body?
386
00:18:01,200 --> 00:18:04,359
No, the real question is,
how do we investigate them
387
00:18:04,440 --> 00:18:06,119
without them finding out?
388
00:18:06,200 --> 00:18:08,000
Their campaign kickoff
party is tomorrow.
389
00:18:08,079 --> 00:18:10,039
We can look for clues
at your house while they're out.
390
00:18:10,119 --> 00:18:12,799
Sure. But how do you leave
the fundraiser without Diya noticing?
391
00:18:15,480 --> 00:18:19,119
Yes. As sad as we are
that Sheriff Cogburn died
392
00:18:19,200 --> 00:18:21,559
the silver lining is
there's no other way
393
00:18:21,640 --> 00:18:23,720
we would have this chance
to be co-sheriffs.
394
00:18:23,799 --> 00:18:25,640
Politics is all luck.
395
00:18:25,720 --> 00:18:28,240
I never would've become mayor
if my opponent hadn't drowned
396
00:18:28,319 --> 00:18:29,400
in my bathtub.
397
00:18:29,480 --> 00:18:31,480
This is exactly like that.
398
00:18:32,920 --> 00:18:34,079
You better stick close to me.
399
00:18:34,160 --> 00:18:36,200
Don't you dare give me
the slip again like at Spooner's.
400
00:18:36,279 --> 00:18:37,440
Mom, look! It's Mr. S!
401
00:18:38,319 --> 00:18:41,519
- Mr. S.
- Diya, Velma said you'd be here.
402
00:18:41,599 --> 00:18:45,119
She also said you spent two years
in a cave and need "it" so bad
403
00:18:45,200 --> 00:18:46,200
you can't see straight.
404
00:18:46,279 --> 00:18:47,400
Velma!
405
00:18:47,480 --> 00:18:49,559
I told you to ignore
what I say in my sleep.
406
00:18:49,640 --> 00:18:52,759
Regardless, you are staying
at your father's tonight. Now, get.
407
00:18:53,400 --> 00:18:54,759
Daphne, it worked.
408
00:18:58,160 --> 00:19:02,599
Yes. I can absolutely prove your house
was burned down by a ghost.
409
00:19:02,680 --> 00:19:04,680
It hasn't burned yet.
410
00:19:04,759 --> 00:19:06,799
The ghost is still
calculating the insurance.
411
00:19:06,880 --> 00:19:10,480
Fred! Enough with your ridiculous
spooky stuff hunting business.
412
00:19:10,559 --> 00:19:13,240
Our family name can only take
so much embarrassment.
413
00:19:19,079 --> 00:19:20,440
Norville.
414
00:19:20,519 --> 00:19:22,240
This is what the pioneers smoked.
415
00:19:22,319 --> 00:19:24,920
And kids who get high with their parents
always turn out great.
416
00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:26,599
But I have something I need to do.
417
00:19:27,920 --> 00:19:30,359
We've looked everywhere
for evidence and found nothing.
418
00:19:30,440 --> 00:19:32,200
Though, kudos.
If your moms aren't killers,
419
00:19:32,279 --> 00:19:34,079
they're way better at it
than being cops.
420
00:19:34,160 --> 00:19:35,200
You sure?
421
00:19:35,279 --> 00:19:38,400
Because it seems like we just caught
you two acting really stupid.
422
00:19:38,480 --> 00:19:41,599
Oh, God! You did kill Cogburn!
I promise we won't tell.
423
00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:43,599
Though, we should consider
doing a podcast about it.
424
00:19:43,680 --> 00:19:46,440
- People would listen.
- Velma, we didn't kill Cogburn.
425
00:19:46,519 --> 00:19:48,720
We've just been trying
to protect you from the truth.
426
00:19:48,799 --> 00:19:50,839
But then Amber
spilled the beans
427
00:19:50,920 --> 00:19:53,400
like they were making burritos
in an earthquake.
428
00:19:53,480 --> 00:19:54,599
Amber. Am I right?
429
00:19:54,680 --> 00:19:57,880
It's true. We only found Cogburn's body
in the woods yesterday,
430
00:19:57,960 --> 00:20:00,119
but this is from three weeks ago.
431
00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:02,839
I am here in the Police
Department records room,
432
00:20:02,920 --> 00:20:05,599
where it appears
Sheriff Cogburn was murdered.
433
00:20:05,680 --> 00:20:08,559
We're not sure.
There's no body. Just this...
434
00:20:09,960 --> 00:20:12,119
Donna, sweetie,
don't puke on that.
435
00:20:12,200 --> 00:20:13,240
It's evidence.
436
00:20:13,319 --> 00:20:15,319
You knew Cogburn was killed
three weeks ago?
437
00:20:15,400 --> 00:20:17,559
Why hide that and start
planning your campaign?
438
00:20:17,640 --> 00:20:19,920
You wanna be a sheriff,
not a congressman from Florida.
439
00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:22,119
Velma, this case
is like recycling.
440
00:20:22,200 --> 00:20:25,000
The less you actually know about it,
the happier you'll be.
441
00:20:25,079 --> 00:20:26,960
Wait. Is that my mom's
cold case file?
442
00:20:27,039 --> 00:20:29,519
Why is that evidence? And where are
Dr. Perdue's journals?
443
00:20:29,599 --> 00:20:31,559
They were in the file
when I gave it back to Cogburn.
444
00:20:31,880 --> 00:20:35,480
- Could that be why he was killed?
- Do you mean Dr. Edna Perdue?
445
00:20:35,559 --> 00:20:38,480
Mr. S was just talking about her
at the fundraiser.
446
00:20:38,559 --> 00:20:41,960
- He's, like, obsessed with her.
- What? Mr. S!
447
00:20:42,039 --> 00:20:44,559
Oh, my God, Daphne. I think
we might have pimped my mom out
448
00:20:44,640 --> 00:20:46,240
to Cogburn's actual murderer.
449
00:20:48,960 --> 00:20:52,119
Hey, Fred. I'm not here
to ask you to accept my apology
450
00:20:52,200 --> 00:20:54,200
for accidentally killing
your mom again.
451
00:20:54,279 --> 00:20:56,960
I just want to say that
my dad doesn't get me either.
452
00:20:57,440 --> 00:21:00,160
But while I agree with him
that your business is ridiculous,
453
00:21:00,240 --> 00:21:02,839
you still made it a success
through pure hustle.
454
00:21:03,839 --> 00:21:07,680
A nerd likes me. Now I know what
a fanny pack feels like.
455
00:21:07,759 --> 00:21:09,839
Okay. Well, I mean it.
456
00:21:09,920 --> 00:21:12,880
Like, I mean it when I say I'm sorry
I accidentally killed your mom.
457
00:21:14,119 --> 00:21:16,200
Fine. Apology accepted.
458
00:21:16,279 --> 00:21:18,720
I forgive you, though,
mostly because I have to
459
00:21:18,799 --> 00:21:20,640
on account of my new faith.
460
00:21:20,720 --> 00:21:22,680
But you take the bad
with the good.
461
00:21:22,759 --> 00:21:24,640
Wait. We've been talking
about your mom
462
00:21:24,720 --> 00:21:26,000
and I haven't hallucinated.
463
00:21:26,079 --> 00:21:28,599
You accepting my apology
must have cured them, Fred.
464
00:21:28,680 --> 00:21:32,200
- So are we good?
- Good? No, we're not good.
465
00:21:32,279 --> 00:21:35,440
You killed me, Norville,
and I'll never let you forget it.
466
00:21:38,160 --> 00:21:39,759
Fred. Quick. I need a snack.
467
00:21:39,839 --> 00:21:42,960
All they have are baby carrots
and even I don't hate you that much.
468
00:21:44,079 --> 00:21:47,480
Mom!
Please don't be dead or having sex.
469
00:21:47,559 --> 00:21:49,480
Oh, God. No, Mom.
470
00:21:49,559 --> 00:21:51,319
It's worse that I thought.
You're writing.
471
00:21:51,400 --> 00:21:53,319
I mean, what's going on?
472
00:21:53,400 --> 00:21:54,920
Where's Mr. S?
Did he try to kill you?
473
00:21:55,000 --> 00:21:57,519
Kill me?
I've never felt more alive.
474
00:21:57,599 --> 00:21:59,319
I'm writing again.
475
00:21:59,400 --> 00:22:00,960
I know I said
I was scared to do it,
476
00:22:01,039 --> 00:22:03,480
but as that perfect ass
held me in his arms,
477
00:22:03,559 --> 00:22:07,319
I realized I can't live life
and be afraid of it.
478
00:22:07,400 --> 00:22:10,319
So does that mean you'll let me
continue solving mysteries?
479
00:22:10,400 --> 00:22:12,839
Where's Mr. S?
Did he kill Cogburn?
480
00:22:12,920 --> 00:22:14,319
And if he didn't,
can we say he did?
481
00:22:14,400 --> 00:22:16,400
A suspect would really
help our campaign.
482
00:22:16,480 --> 00:22:19,319
I really want to say no. But given
the other options in this town,
483
00:22:19,400 --> 00:22:21,519
maybe it's best if you do
keep solving mysteries.
484
00:22:24,720 --> 00:22:27,000
So, I've been thinking,
and you're right.
485
00:22:27,079 --> 00:22:29,519
It wasn't an accident
I told Norville I loved him.
486
00:22:29,599 --> 00:22:32,279
Okay, well,
I appreciate you telling me
487
00:22:32,359 --> 00:22:34,920
and having the courage to do it
within punching distance.
488
00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:37,119
No, look, I thought
my mom was overreacting
489
00:22:37,200 --> 00:22:39,680
about mysteries being dangerous
but she wasn't.
490
00:22:39,759 --> 00:22:43,799
If you ever got hurt because I was
solving a mystery, I'd literally die.
491
00:22:43,880 --> 00:22:47,119
So you've been protecting me
this whole time.
492
00:22:47,200 --> 00:22:49,480
That's so romantic.
But now what?
493
00:22:49,559 --> 00:22:51,640
I'm not sure,
but I know for a fact
494
00:22:51,720 --> 00:22:54,160
that whatever's brewing
is even bigger than last time.
495
00:22:54,240 --> 00:22:57,799
And I know for a fact that as long
as we're together, we'll be fine.
496
00:22:57,880 --> 00:23:00,359
- We're soulmates.
- Soulmates?
497
00:23:00,799 --> 00:23:03,359
Daphne, that term was invented
by the publishing industry
498
00:23:03,440 --> 00:23:05,640
to sell books about vampires
boning werewolves.
499
00:23:05,720 --> 00:23:08,160
No, it wasn't.
Everyone believes in soulmates.
500
00:23:08,240 --> 00:23:10,279
We're teenage girls,
not divorce lawyers.
501
00:23:10,359 --> 00:23:12,200
Sure, the sentiment
of a soul is nice,
502
00:23:12,279 --> 00:23:14,359
but the only immutable
essence inside of me
503
00:23:14,440 --> 00:23:16,960
is Beyonce's incomparable
"If I Were a Boy".
504
00:23:17,039 --> 00:23:19,599
So you just think we're what?
Intelligent meat?
505
00:23:19,680 --> 00:23:21,799
Don't be reductive.
I think we're horny meat.
506
00:23:21,880 --> 00:23:25,319
Yeah, well, this meat
has never been less horny.
507
00:23:26,000 --> 00:23:27,319
Daphne, I'm sorry.
508
00:23:27,400 --> 00:23:30,039
Can't we just be mature about this
and make out a little bit?
509
00:23:30,599 --> 00:23:32,640
She took the sock off the door,
so I'm going to bed.
510
00:23:32,960 --> 00:23:34,759
What? You live here now?
511
00:23:48,839 --> 00:23:50,680
"What do you know
about Dr. Edna Perdue?"
512
00:23:50,759 --> 00:23:53,559
"And like, women in general?
I'm having some problems with my girl."
513
00:23:53,640 --> 00:23:55,559
"I'll tell you everything you want
to know tomorrow
514
00:23:55,640 --> 00:23:58,839
if you tell your mom
I'm not looking for a relationship."
515
00:24:00,599 --> 00:24:01,799
What?
516
00:24:02,119 --> 00:24:03,799
Hello, dear?
517
00:24:03,880 --> 00:24:06,000
If you've found a cold sore,
I can explain.
518
00:24:06,079 --> 00:24:07,759
I have herpes.
519
00:24:09,000 --> 00:24:10,079
Hello?
41087
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