All language subtitles for Doc Martin S02E04 Redigert

Thanks for tuning into
Radio Portwenn with me.

This is Caroline Bosman bringing you the
latest local news, gossip and interviews.

ln the studio with me today
is local boy made good,

successful London architect Danny Steel.

- Danny, thanks for coming in.
- lt's a pleasure, Caroline.

Can l just say, it's been super
having you back in Portwenn.

Well, it's lovely to be back.

We can't persuade you to stay?

- Well, if anyone could, Caroline, you could.

Tosser.

l'm in the running
for a couple of projects in London.

Shame. Still, we are so lucky to have you
on the show for...

...National Home lmprovement Week.
Well done.

- Could you tell our listeners...?
- Can we have the radio off, please?

- ls This the right form for a new NHS card?
- What?

- new patient.
...must've worked hard...

We're not open.

l didn't have an appointment so l thought
l ought to come early.

Right. l'll see you now.

Right, right. Great.
All sounds very impressive.

Lots of exams and things, l would imagine.
Pretty tough.

- Turn that up.
Yes.

- Coffee is So not Good for you.
- Shh.

...and being in London.

You've sh-till got your family down here
haven't you? Your mum.

- ls she slurring?
- Caroline? ls Jude Law fit?

- What?
- Yeah, yeah, she...she was slurring.

- Sorry. should l Come back another time?
- No, come through.

So, you're sexing up
the family home, are you?

Yes, Mum's old place. l'm not sure about
sexing up.

lt's more a lick of paint, really.

Won't be a tick.

Keep going.

And...obviously...Caroline,
when you're selling a house,

it's good to view it from the point of view
of the buyer.

Er, try not to make bold statements,
keep to neutral colours.

Fifty-four.

Right.

lt's a BMl of 21 .5.

ls that good?

lt's within recommended
guidelines, yes.

- Great. So...
- Just a few questions.

Have you, or any of your close family,
ever suffered from:

- Diabetes?
- No.

- Heart disease?
- No.

- Arthritis?
- No.

- Doctor, erm...l came here to register and...
- That's what we're doing.

At the library l got a card in five minutes.

lf you get smallpox, l'm sure a
good book'll be a great comfort to you.

- Any history of fitting or dizziness?
- No.

Chest pain, indigestion or
breathlessness?

l know. l know.

Poor bloke.

Having to put up with that boozed-up
old trout flirting with him on live radio.

lt's disgusting. She must be forty
if she's a day.

Makes you wanna throw.
- Pauline.

- Yeah?
- you done my list for This morning?

- Yeah.
- Can l have it, please?

Now?

Thank you.

Hello, Mr Cooke. You OK, my love?

- l came early. Hope you don't mind.

Oh, God.

Sorry, love. l'm sorry, Doc. l know l smell.

People keep saying. l can
smell it myself sometimes.

Come through, please.

Right. Er...

...could you open your mouth?

Are you quite sure, Doctor?

Well, l don't think it's the breath, but l'm
gonna just take a swab of your mouth.

l'm sorry, Doc.

That's why l came early.
Didn't want anyone to have to wait with me.

No, that's, er, that's fine.

Er...

Mr Cooke, er...odour aside,
there's no indication of ill health.

No infection of the tonsils,
which could be a factor.

No gum disease, no atrophic rhinitis.

l've, er, taken the samples and, er,
we'll see what comes back.

- Thank you.
- ln the meantime, let's get back to basics.

What does that mean?

Well, it's, er... Just let me
make some calls and, er, see.

Come back this afternoon and, erm,
we'll try and sort you out something then.

Nothing's been the same since
l've been on my own, Doc.

- Oh, right, your wife's died, has she?
- Wife? No.

- l mean since Freddie went.
- Who's Freddie?

My greenfinch. Flew away weeks back.

l loved that bird.

He could sing that song.
How does it go?

Er...
Pomp-a-pomp pom pom pom...

No idea, sorry.

Pomp-a-pomp pom pom pom...

No, l can't help you.

Freddie knew it pertect.

- Hi, there.
- Hello.

Waiting for the bus?

Of course. l, erm...
Are you on holiday, or...?

No. l've just moved here, actually.

Really? That's great. l mean good.
l'm PC Mylow. Mark, by the way.

- the village police officer.
- Yeah.

Right. Yes. Well, be sure
to come and search me out if l can...

And welcome to Portwenn.

Thanks.

- Bye, then.
- Bye.

Hello again. Sorry, it's just that, erm...

There aren't any more buses today.

- And you reckon these'll work, do you?
- No, l just prescribe them for fun.

Ah. Caroline. l'm glad you dropped in.
Can you spare a moment?

No, it's fine. l'm sure Pauline
can sort me out a prescription.

- Come through, please.
- Er, sorry, no time to chat.

l'm not properly parked. l only need some
medication for a recurrent condition.

l don't need to bother you. l usually
get it over the counter, but Mrs Tishell...

She rightly thought that such a condition
should be investigated by your physician.

- What's the medication?
- Oh. Was it, er... ls it fluconazole?

Thrush?

lt's only the third time, the fourth at most.
She's...such a busybody.

- Why don't you go and park your car?
- l haven't got time.

l believe l have a couple
of cancellations this afternoon.

Look, l've said l don't have
time today.

Can't you just
fix me the bloody prescription?

l don't just fix prescriptions,
bloody or otherwise,

l'd like to see you. lf not today,
then tomorrow.

Humph.

lt seems l'm to have an
appointment tomorrow.

Well, it seems l'll have to make one for you.
l've got a two o'clock or a two-thirty.

Mm, l'll take the two o'clock.

Not exactly difficult to find, are you?

The car looks like it's been parked
by a 12-year-old.

l was only planning to be here 30 seconds.

l have been sitting at our meeting
like a right sodding plonker!

- Do you mind? This is a doctor's surgery.
- Look...Tom, let's just go outside.

This isn't the time or the place.

l don't know whether
it's the drink or what.

- But you're just not you anymore.
- Tom. Of course l'm me. l...l just...

l've packed a few things.
l'll let you know where l am.

Tom!

Tom!

This is totally brilliant.

This is not brilliant.

- l wouldn't park there, if l were you.
- Really?

Well, if l were you,
l wouldn't come out in daylight, love.

Caroline! Caroline!

- Mark, can l have a word?
- Doc. can l ask your professional opinion?

- Feldenkrais...
- l haven't got time.

Rediscover your capacity
for graceful movement.

- Mark.
- Hi.

Hi. Hello, Doctor.

Hello. Could we?

- Yes. Yes, of course.
- Nothing urgent, l hope?

Oh, no. Just that you said
if l needed anything,

and l wondered if
you know a good driving instructor.

- Mark, l need to speak to you.
- Yes. Right.

lf you take a seat, l'll be with
you in five minutes.

Four minutes.

Wow. What do you think of her?

Let's see if my special spray
does what it says on the tin. Pheromones.

Mark, l think Caroline Bosman
has a drink problem

- And is continuing to drive.
- l see.

What worries me is she's a risk to herself
and other people.

l'll look into it. Does this smell
of anything? l can't smell anything.

- What do you mean you'll ''look into it''?
- l need evidence.

You might be an aggrieved neighbour,
someone with an axe to grind.

- l'm her doctor.
- l Take drinking And driving very seriously.

- ls she single?
- Mark, you are a police officer.

A member of this community
is a potential danger to herself and others.

l expect you to act appropriately.

Sorry to keep you waiting.
l'm Mark.

- l'm Julie. Julie Mitchell.
- Hi, Julie. Great name.

So, erm...driving instructors?

When you live in the country,
you have got to drive.

OK. Let's see. There's Andrew Clarke,
he used to be quite good.

He might've retired after his eyesight got...

No, you'd probably have to
go to Delabole.

Unless you had someone local,
you know, informal.

Listen, don't suppose...
Just a mad idea...

You wouldn't...you wouldn't consider,
if it was just informal...

Sorry. That just came, whoop, out of the...

No, no, no. No, why not? OK.

- OK? Really?
- Yeah. Why not? Thanks.

lt's not because you're pretty.

- l mean...
- l've already said yes.

Social Services? No.

- They'll give you a bath.
- l can bath myself.

But they'll give you a bath, do your laundry,
and give your house a good clean.

- l'm not having charity. No.
- lt's not charity.

Mr Cooke, l can find nothing obviously
wrong with you, for the moment,

so let's see if this works
before we try anything more invasive.

Mr Cooke, as your doctor...

Doctor? What do you know?
You're frightened of the sight of blood.

l know you stink to high heaven.

Ahh.

ls it really that bad?

Social Services are here.

Oh, all right, then, Doc, you win.
Let's give it a try.

- All right, Doc?
- Yeah.

Excuse me, Doc.

- So, how's life as a radio star, then?
Did you hear it?

- Yes.
- lt's a real penance.

l've agreed to do a whole week of it.

- the pinnacle of my career.
- l didn't realise it was a career move.

A career move in Portwenn?
l don't think so.

- there you are.
- Thanks. And...

- Thanks, Mike.
- ...and that one.

Right. Thank you very much.

Look, sorry, l...l didn't mean...
Obviously your job, that's fantastic...

l mean, you've...you've done brilliantly.
l wasn't talking about you.

- Oh!
- Oh, that's all right. Now foot on the clutch.

And away we go.

Look, what l meant was, erm...
l don't wanna sound arrogant,

but here l am, a career architect,
on community radio

talking about the merits of
sash bloody windows.

Caroline left me on my own
while we were on air.

To go to the ''loo''.

Erm, so, what does that mean?

Everybody knows.
And her breath as well, it...

Right. Just put the box there,
and l'll sort 'em out tomorrow.

- l'm just saying she needs some help.
- Yeah, bye, Danny.

And slip her into third.

Well done. She likes you.

- Whoa!

You all right?

- Yeah.
- Well done.

Thanks.

- Who was that?
- Don't worry, l'm on to it.

- Out. Out, out, out, out, out. Out!

- Hi.
- Hi.

Oh, hello.

Erm, l...l wouldn't, er...

- Oh.

- So, er...how are you?
- How's your new job?

You first.

Yeah, great. But it...but it's hard, you know.
Sometimes l feel like a fraud,

like the governors will realise
their huge mistake

and that l am, in fact,
completely incompetent.

But, er, l expect everyone feels like that,
don't they?

l mean not...not you, obviously,
because, er...

well, you're a proper professional.

That's why l'm here, actually. Erm...
could l ask for some professional advice?

Of course.

Yeah... Well, the thing is
there's this friend of mine.

l think she might be drinking
too much and, erm...l...

- She's having a hard time at the moment.
- Right.

We're meeting for a drink, and l'd
appreciate some help with how to tackle it.

Well, don't meet her
for a drink, for starters.

Yeah, fair point. But technically speaking,
how many units are too much?

Does it matter?
You obviously think it's too much.

Er, Martin, erm...l'm asking you
to give me a hand here.

Caro...no, my friend, needs
help and l don't know what to do.

Well, if your friend
is the person l think she is,

- then l don't think she wants help.
- that depends on How you give it.

You give advice, they want a prescription.
Give them a prescription, they want advice.

There are no fixed rules.

You just feel your way and listen to
your patients, l guess.

Oh, right. That hadn't occurred to me.

- Martin.
- What?

What am l doing wrong?

Whenever l try and, erm...connect
with you, you just, er...close down.

Then l doubt myself when maybe
it's you who should.

Then you'd be more approachable
and people would listen to your advice.

- And apart from it helping you...
- You're so conversant with my job,

you won't need my advice when you meet
your alcoholic friend Caroline for drinks.

This one's got a great view.
l want it to be special.

lt's very romantic, especially at sunset.

- not too obvious?
- No.

Maybe this one. Bit less...
But what if she gets chilly?

We could move one of the patio heaters.
No, l think this one. This is the one.

Fine. This table, 7.30,
tomorrow night, for two.

- Hi, Louisa.
- Hi there.

- What can l get you?
- a bottle of sparkling mineral water.

Make that a large one with two glasses.
Thanks, Jade.

Thank you.

- Hey.
- l am So glad to see you.

- Had a bad day?
- The world's going mad around me.

- ls it?

- See, the thing is, Caroline...
- have you ordered yet?

- l Could kill for some cold Chablis.
- l'm not drinking.

Are you on a diet or something? You're
looking very, erm... Are you sleeping OK?

l don't need a medical, Louisa.
l'm seeing a doctor tomorrow.

l just need a couple of glasses of wine.

People seem to drink so much at the
moment, don't you think? Thanks.

So, perhaps we could
just give it a miss.

What do you mean, ''everyone''?

l'm concerned.

Well, l'm concerned, actually.
Because if you'd bothered to ask me,

l'd have told you that Tom has just
left me and l am feeling crap.

Oh, Caroline, l'm sorry. l had no idea.

So we could've drunk
that bottle of wine together,

because that is what old
friends do, actually.

And maybe, just...just maybe...

OK, then, as an old friend, l thought,
hearing you on the radio today,

that you didn't sound yourself
and that you sounded a bit shaky.

You just wanted to pat me on the back
and tell me to sober up.

- No, come on. l...
- Well thanks but no thanks!

Go and do your pastoral care
on nine-year-olds!

Tom?

lt's me. Mark.

Oh, Mark.

What do you want?

l'm asleep.

Sorry to wake you. l just wanted
to have a chat. lt's quite important.

Well, what is it?

l just wanted to mention, it's
a good idea to be a bit careful about...

having one too many. Best to stick
to fruit juice when you're driving.

- you as well?
- you nearly ran me off the road.

And l've received comments
in my professional capacity.

Well, what comments?
l mean, who from?

l'm not at liberty to divulge my sources.

Oh, just bugger off!

- Caroline!

...Portwenn's very own
architect extraordinaire. Welcome back.

Thank you.
- our first caller is Bert Large.

- Lovely boy, that Danny.
lf you want the job doing well,

you wanna get in the professionals.

Large and Son provide free quotations
for any job.

Thank you, Bert.
Did you have a question?

Yes, l did. My question is for
you actually, Caroline.

What time are you driving home?

l wanted to make sure
l'm not on the road too.

Thank you, Bert.
- Mrs Tishell.

...for your contribution.
- There you are, off you go.

You refused to give a patient of mine
fluconazole yesterday.

l'm sorry, l... lt's the fifth time she's had it
and l know you don't like...

Absolutely. And you should not
give her fluconazole without a prescription.

l don't need to apologise?

No. lf she's not happy,
l'll review the situation when l've seen her.

Oh, Doctor. Would now be a good time
to look at those journals together?

- l can make a cup of tea And a pasty.
- No. l have surgery. Good Morning.

Homemade.

- Caroline?

You OK?

l'm fine. Just...just leave me, would you?

Come on. Bert just spouts hot air...
so you don't notice you've got no hot water.

That's not true, actually.
He did get hot water through once...

into Bruce Hanton's downstairs toilet bowl.

Here you go.

They're all in the bar.
lt's Stella's twenty-first.

- Hey, happy birthday!
- Hi!

- Hi!
- Thank you! Yeah, good, yeah.

- Oh, Caroline! Hi!

- Cheers, Stella.
- Thank you. Thank you very much.

- have a Good one.
Cheers.

Caroline. Take a seat.

l... Please can l have a prescription?
l've got thrush. lt's pretty common.

lt's not common to succumb to it
quite as frequently as you apparently do.

Two or three times?

Mrs Tishell said it was five times
in the last 23 weeks.

lsn't that breaking patient confidentiality?

l would be within my rights to
go and get fluconazole elsewhere.

You would. Do you wash
the affected area with soap and water?

- l beg your pardon?
- lt's best if you don't use soap.

l'll bear that in mind.

Do you have any other symptoms?

l don't know if you're aware
but your speech is quite often slurred.

l think l know what my voice
sounds like. l work on the radio.

- l'd like to look in your mouth.
- What?

Candida albicans, the fungus associated
with thrush, also lives in the mouth.

Sit down, please.

Open.

You've been drinking.

That's what you wanted to know.

First l'll deal with the thrush,
then the alcohol.

The alcohol?

No. l don't drink more than anybody else.

Do you drink first thing in the morning
to steady your nerves?

No! l mean, certainly not.

Do you often get annoyed with people
who criticise your drinking?

Oh! That's it, l've had enough.

Who do you think you are,
asking inappropriate questions

about something l have not
consulted you about?!

So, that's a yes, is it?

Heard of patient choice, Doctor?
l am just about to exercise it.

You're such a people person, aren't you?

Next!

Oh, God.

Caroline.

l know. Mark, look, l'm...l'm just not with it
at the moment.

Caroline, l'm sorry about this.

l suspect you may have been drinking.

- Mark. This is me, Caroline.
- we have to do This properly.

- Please switch off your ignition And get Out.
For God's sake, Mark.

l haven't been drinking. l mean,
l've had exactly one glass of champagne.

- What's the matter with everyone?
- when Did you last have alcohol?

l don't know.
A...a couple of hours ago.

You must do a breath test.
You can be arrested for failure to supply.

- l can't believe this.
- l'll show you how the breathalyser works.

- This is the tube that you blow into...
- Oh, just...just give it here.

You've gotta be joking.

Hi. Look, l'm sorry about yesterday.

Peace offering.

Do you wanna...come in?
So...

- Martin'll be here in a minute.
- Oh, well...

then everything will be lovely.

Can l get you anything?

Water. Cold.

l don't know if l should give you any water.
lt might, erm, affect the blood test.

Then what would you like to get me, Mark?

She wanted water
but l can't give her water...

Right.

- Caroline.
- Dr Ellingham.

- you All right?
ls that some sort of joke?

Do you know why l'm here?
- For God's sake.

- to Take a blood sample for the police.
- get on with it.

Right. Give me your arm.

- are you decorating? l can smell varnish.
- l noticed that.

l thought it might be nail varnish, but...
lt could be my aftershave,

the one l was telling you about.

Right. Hold that.

You can get her a glass of water now.

You're not well.
l'd like to do some more tests.

You're not my doctor anymore.

Nevertheless, l strongly advise that
you let me examine you.

You know what?
You can keep your strong advice.

- l wanna Go home now. Mark?
- Your vehicle can be towed, but...

l wanna go home now. Please.

l can't leave the station at the moment.

l've got somebody coming in...
an...an appointment.

All right, l'll take her.

No, thanks. l'd rather walk.

This is where we had that detention.
Remember?

We got sent to the head for bundling
what's-his-name in the wheelie bin.

And that thing on the lid
so he couldn't get out.

God forgive us. Do you give detentions?

No, not really.
Well, l sort of try not to.

l only did that thing to
Martin because he kissed you.

Did what? Has he said something?

- Who?
- Martin.

You just said, didn't you just say?

Martin Farry. ln the wheelie bin.

Oh. Oh, oh, that Martin.

So that's why you've been so
cool with me.

Well, l've hardly been cool.

Anyway, nothing ever actually happened.
lt was...nothing.

- Really?
- No. Really.

Honestly, it was...

lt...it was moments.

And...and not even that. lt was, you know
...a moment.

Erm...

- Where are you going?
- Vernon's on his way.

- Oh.
- The Care Bears say he's just as bad.

Well, you can't just leave.

l'm going to get an aromatherapy burner
and some oils.

- Good idea.

Ellingham. How's it going in...?
Where is it?

- Portwenn. Thanks for getting back to me.
- What can l do for you?

An old man, late seventies, with frankly
the worst smell l've ever come across.

lf you don't know, l don't know.
You're the great diagnostician.

- anything else in the history?
- No, l've checked for URl infections.

Send in a SWAT team
and scrub him down.

That didn't work. He's possibly depressed.
His greenfinch is missing.

So what's the smell? Ammonia?
Ammonia with depression, l'd guess liver.

- No.
- Pear drops. smell of Pear drops.

Pauline, call
the Police Forensic Science Service.

Tell them l want a glucose test on Caroline
Bosman's sample. Urgently.

You've got patients backing up.

Right, well, send the next one through.
But make that call.

Mr Addo, you can go through.

Those tablets are rubbish.
l'm still coughing up the Yangtze River.

You've just started taking them.
They're antibiotics.

- You're meant to finish the course.
- Oh, sure. l read the newspaper.

l know what drug companies do.

Paying you to test drugs on people like me.
Bunging you computers, free lunches...

Ellingham. Yes.

Bosman. Glucose.
Oh, that was quick. How high?

No, no, no, not you. Patient.

Are you sure? l'll get right on to it.
Thanks for letting me know.

Pauline!

Right, l'm cutting short our consultation.

Take the tablets, drink plenty of fluids

and lap up the contents
of your moronic newspaper.

l've got an
emergency home visit.

Hello? You've got patients.

Reschedule them. But first,

call Mrs Tishell and ask her to prepare
a 10ml ampoule of soluble insulin.

Tell her l'll be there in four minutes.

l left her a message at the
radio saying l'd call in.

- She's gone out somewhere.
- Yeah, maybe you're right.

- Probably down the pub.
- l was Pretty rubbish last night.

Maybe she's avoiding me.

Martin.

- Where is she?
- Not here. What's the matter?

l dropped her here
not more than an hour ago.

She was in no state to go anywhere.

- Tried the back?
- Yeah, it's locked.

Caroline!

- We'll have to break in.
- That's a bit over the top, isn't it?

Caroline?

- Caroline.
- Oh, my God. Caroline.

- lt's Dr Ellingham.

- Well, can l do something?
- Yeah. Call an ambulance.

Tell 'em it's suspected ketoacidosis and l'm
giving her 10ml of insulin subcutaneously.

- Right. OK.
- lnsulin? But she's not diabetic, is she?

- Now, please.
- Yeah.

Ambulance, please.

All right, Caroline.
Gonna give you an injection.

l'm saying a prayer for you, Caroline.

- Just a little prick.
The doctor's here. He says...

Yeah. And he's giving her an injection.
lnsulin. 10ml.

Hi.
- Hi.

l don't know if you got my message.

Message?

- about the driving school in Delabole?
- Oh, the message.

lt just seems, you know... A place
on their intensive course at short notice...

- lt's too good an opportunity to pass up.
- of course.

lt makes sense just to blitz it
and get my licence.

Yeah, too good an opportunity.
Yeah, go for it.

So, erm, l'll see you around. Bye.

- Doctor.
- Mm-Hm.

- Mark, you have a problem.
- You're right there, Doc.

Your breathalyser. How old is it?

What? l dunno.
Since before my time, l think.

Some of the older breathalysers picked up
ketones in people with diabetes.

Gave a false positive recording.

That smell of nail varnish? That's ketones.

That's what your device was registering.
Not alcohol.

Caroline's blood-sugar level measured
so high that she nearly died.

So get rid of your old breathalyser
and find something that works.

Yeah. What does work, Doc?
What does work?

Oh, l dunno. Any of the newer models.

And, er, well done. That call, Caroline's test.
Probably saved her life.

l'm sure she'll be very grateful.

Hello. lt's PC Mylow here.
Yeah, fine.

l made a reservation
for a table for two for tonight.

Yeah. l...l'd like to cancel it, please.
Thank you.

l told you l was clean.

Right, come through, would you?

Mr Cooke.

No, Mr Cooke, it's not your fault.

Those two old ducks were as
good as gold, but...

they could do nothing. Mind you,
my toes got a good clipping.

l'm gonna send you to the hospital in Truro.
They'll keep you in for a while.

Just to, er, monitor what's going on.

Bye, Doc. Bye, Mr Cooke.

Er, not so fast, Pauline.
Call Truro Hospital.

Find a bed for Mr Cooke,
and book in those tests. Thank you.

l'll look for your patient notes.

Oh, God. Stupid thing.

l...l've some matches here
somewhere, Pauline.

Erm...there we are.

- Yeah.
Oh, God!

They must be in here somewhere.

Mr Cooke. Can l... D'you mind
if l, erm, have a look at what's in your bag?

Oh.

Freddie.

Doc? Tom Bosman, Caroline's husband.

- Oh, yes, l remember.
- l'm sorry about that. l was out of order.

- How is she?
- Alive, thanks to you.

- Louisa told me What happened. Thanks.
- Good.

Anyway, she's in there, bed four.

Still bloody-minded.
There's no cure for that, l suppose?

- No, l'm afraid there isn't.
- You're the wrong person to ask anyway.

- Mr Bosman...
- Sorry, that was a...that was a joke.

Yeah.