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♪ ♪
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[Louise]
Yes, yes, yes! Oh, my God,
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oh, my God, oh, my God,
it's gonna be so great.
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00:00:23,881 --> 00:00:24,950
And I thought Gene was excited
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00:00:24,950 --> 00:00:26,687
- about pancakes.
- Pancakes!
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- LOUISE: Oh,
pancakes schmancakes.
- BOTH: Hey.
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We're going on
the bootlegger tour today.
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Yeah, we are. You and me.
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Two tickets to the tour
at the hotel down the street.
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[whoops] History.
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Seriously, Louise?
Learning stuff?
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00:00:37,909 --> 00:00:39,846
On a Saturday?
You've changed, man.
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00:00:39,846 --> 00:00:42,652
Yeah, history?
More like his-bore-y.
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00:00:42,652 --> 00:00:44,222
'Cause it's boring? High five?
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It's bootleggers, you fools.
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Bootleggers and smugglers
used to hang out at that hotel.
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At that hotel.
What were they doing in there?
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Whatever they wanted.
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Selling their illegal goods
and illegal booze.
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It was just like
a badass farmers market.
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- Don't say "badass."
- Good-ass?
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- No.
- Great-ass?
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- Okay, fine.
- It's nice that they gave us
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00:01:01,256 --> 00:01:03,093
free tickets just 'cause
we're a local business.
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More places should do that.
But not us.
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I don't want
to give anything away.
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Well, I'm excited, too.
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Mom and Louise day,
having a bootlegging time.
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Oh, should we wear boots?
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Or leggings, or both?
Or dress as flappers?
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Call ourselves the Bootlegging
Flappy Bappies? Huh?
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- [Louise] Eh.
- I'll keep thinking.
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Who wants to see
my flappy bappies?
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Bappity-bappity-bappity-bappity.
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Hey, Harold and Edith.
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- You here for the tour?
- No, we're popping in here
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for some afternoon delight.
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- Yes, we're here for the tour.
- Okay.
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[manager]
Hello, and welcome
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to our new
Dishin' About Prohibition tour.
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Let me take you all the way
back to... Oh, hello there.
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- Ugh. Logan?
- Ew.
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- Cynthia?
- Hmm.
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- [both retching]
- Okay, hey, let's get started.
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Can we? Let me take you all
the way back to the Jazz Age,
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when flappers were flappenin'
and illegal hooch was happenin'.
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And the hats? Don't get me
started on the hats.
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Tell us about the hats.
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It's just,
people had amazing hats.
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Whoa, look out the window.
That's Balloon Lady.
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Mom hasn't been gone 20 minutes
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and Dad already
has a wandering eye.
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No, Gene. Balloon Lady.
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One of the sidewalk performers
from down by the wharf.
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- She's a ba-luminary.
- [Gene] Oh, yeah.
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[Gene]
Wait, is that the Bubble Master?
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- Yes, it is.
- Holy crap. Two heavyweights.
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[Gene]
And Doug the Juggler?
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- Are you kidding me?
- [Tina] And, also,
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a guy with a bunch
of dirty pipes.
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Oh, my God, they're coming in.
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Okay, we're all here.
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00:02:27,929 --> 00:02:29,332
And Pipe Guy, for some reason.
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I overheard you guys
when I was lurking near you.
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00:02:31,737 --> 00:02:34,308
Now, how do we decide
who gets Giovanni's spot?
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We fight?
I'm up for fighting.
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Um, what's going on?
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- Giovanni died.
- Oh, no.
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00:02:38,817 --> 00:02:41,255
Is that the guy who tap-danced
on a piece of wood?
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00:02:41,255 --> 00:02:43,727
Yeah, I guess you could say
he, uh, tapped out.
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00:02:43,727 --> 00:02:45,665
And he had the best spot
on Front Street.
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Right by the entrance
to the wharf.
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So now we're trying to decide
who gets his spot.
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- And I think it should be me.
- Oh, please, bubble boy.
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I'm making a balloon sword.
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- Let's all make weapons.
- That's cute.
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- I juggle real swords.
- [grumbles]
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Uh, would any of you
like to order something
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00:02:58,725 --> 00:03:00,093
before you sword-fight?
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00:03:00,093 --> 00:03:01,462
- Ah, fine.
- Okay.
- Yeah.
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00:03:01,563 --> 00:03:03,033
Are those leaking something?
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- Uh, probably.
- Okay.
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[manager]
So here we have
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00:03:06,774 --> 00:03:09,244
an ordinary bookcase.
Just your regular old... Wuh-oh!
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- Whoa.
- Or is it a secret entrance
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to the hotel's old speakeasy?
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It is. Go on in!
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From 1920 to 1933,
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this was a well-hidden haven
for drinking gin and doing sins.
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After Prohibition, it became
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00:03:24,041 --> 00:03:26,178
a very inconvenient
storage room,
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00:03:26,178 --> 00:03:27,849
but now it's a bar again.
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- Go ahead, look around.
- Ho-ho,
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we have way too few secret rooms
at our restaurant.
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You've mentioned that.
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[manager] [old-timey voice]
Look out, the cops are coming!
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- Harold, hold my stash.
- [grunts]
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[regular voice]
If law enforcement showed up,
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00:03:38,269 --> 00:03:40,708
the doorman would warn
the naughty patrons inside here
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through this simple hose
with a little bell thingy
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at the end of it
that looks like a flower.
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- Oh.
- And then the bartender
could talk back through it.
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00:03:47,789 --> 00:03:49,191
[old-timey voice]
"Thanks for the warning, buddy."
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[regular voice]
And everyone could escape
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through a secret tunnel
behind the bar
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that led to the pier.
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- Oh.
- That same tunnel
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was also used by the bootleggers
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to sneak booze and other
smuggled items into the hotel.
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It was just
a really great tunnel.
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00:04:00,682 --> 00:04:02,818
- Is the tunnel still here?
- Uh, sadly, no.
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00:04:02,818 --> 00:04:05,558
No, the whole thing was
filled in by the city in 1953.
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No sense of fun,
those city people.
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00:04:07,395 --> 00:04:09,164
But everything else here
is still intact,
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so you can have a look around,
and then
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I'll take you to room 111,
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00:04:12,872 --> 00:04:15,578
where the notorious smuggler
Slippery Sam always stayed,
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and where
he was eventually betrayed.
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You can react.
You could gasp or "Ooh,"
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- or somethin' like--
- [all oohing]
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- Wow.
- Thank you, that's great.
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[Teddy]
They're having a sit-down
in your restaurant?
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That's a big deal.
I don't think anyone's
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00:04:29,104 --> 00:04:31,510
- ever seen them all
in one place.
- Like The Beatles.
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00:04:31,510 --> 00:04:34,448
- Well, I get the biggest crowds.
- Ha! Maybe 15 years ago.
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00:04:34,448 --> 00:04:37,287
Bubbles are over. Can you make
a bald eagle out of a bubble?
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00:04:37,387 --> 00:04:39,391
- I don't think so.
- Bubbles will never be over.
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00:04:39,391 --> 00:04:40,795
Bubbles are forever.
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00:04:40,795 --> 00:04:43,433
Bubbles, balloons,
you both blow. Get it?
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00:04:43,433 --> 00:04:47,742
I found these pipes in
a dumpster by a grocery store.
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00:04:47,742 --> 00:04:49,513
Look, this isn't
getting us anywhere.
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There is only one thing left
to do: let the street decide.
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00:04:52,585 --> 00:04:53,955
Uh, w-what does that mean?
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00:04:54,088 --> 00:04:56,593
We perform and the winner
is chosen by the audience.
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Wow. Uh, when are
you gonna do that?
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- And-and where?
- Right here, right now.
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00:05:00,969 --> 00:05:02,404
- [all gasp]
- Wait, what?
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00:05:02,404 --> 00:05:04,441
- They mean us. We would decide.
- Ooh.
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00:05:04,542 --> 00:05:06,880
- I think I'm gonna throw up.
- Well, that's the least fun
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street performance.
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00:05:08,316 --> 00:05:10,588
So, this is the room 111,
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where Slippery Sam
would always stay.
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But they could have called him
"Suspicious of Everyone" Sam,
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because he made modifications
to the room--
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unbeknownst to management--
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00:05:19,071 --> 00:05:20,441
in order to hide
his stolen goods
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00:05:20,542 --> 00:05:22,712
from his fellow thieves
and ne'er-do-wells.
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Just an ordinary bedpost, right?
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00:05:25,049 --> 00:05:27,187
[all oohing]
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00:05:27,287 --> 00:05:28,824
And did you notice
the antique outlets?
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Aha!
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- [all oohing]
- But the hiding spot
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for his most famous hidden loot
has never been found.
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- Why not?
- I was getting to that.
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- Oh.
- In 1932,
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Sam checked into the hotel
hoping to find a fence
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for the Jade Jellyfish.
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A dazzling piece of home decor
that was estimated to be worth
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around $40,000 at that time,
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00:05:48,530 --> 00:05:52,605
which today would be
the equivalent of over $700,000.
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00:05:52,605 --> 00:05:54,810
- [all oohing]
- Holy crap!
- The Jade Jellyfish
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00:05:54,910 --> 00:05:56,479
was stolen from
its original owner,
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00:05:56,479 --> 00:05:59,018
a New York collector
named Carlyle Linus,
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00:05:59,018 --> 00:06:01,156
and hidden somewhere
in or around the hotel
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while a sale was arranged.
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Slippery Sam had more
than his share of enemies,
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00:06:06,198 --> 00:06:08,036
so not only did he hide
the Jellyfish,
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00:06:08,036 --> 00:06:11,409
he also left behind a letter
for his girlfriend Mimi Molero,
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00:06:11,510 --> 00:06:13,379
in case anything
should happen to him.
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00:06:13,479 --> 00:06:15,483
But it would turn out
to be Mimi herself
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00:06:15,483 --> 00:06:17,955
who would betray Slippery Sam.
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[gasps]
Mimi.
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Yes. On October 15th, 1932,
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00:06:22,030 --> 00:06:24,703
Mimi was arrested for running
an unlicensed casino
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00:06:24,703 --> 00:06:26,439
on a converted barge
out in the bay.
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She called it
the S.S. Perfectly Legal,
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00:06:29,278 --> 00:06:30,848
but it certainly was not.
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00:06:30,948 --> 00:06:33,286
To avoid jail time,
she sang like a canary
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00:06:33,286 --> 00:06:35,090
about her notorious boyfriend,
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00:06:35,090 --> 00:06:37,194
giving the G-men enough dirt
to put Sam away
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00:06:37,194 --> 00:06:38,697
for the rest of his life.
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00:06:38,797 --> 00:06:40,400
Which wasn't long,
because he died in a shoot-out
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00:06:40,501 --> 00:06:41,971
in this very hotel
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00:06:41,971 --> 00:06:43,740
when they tried
to take him into custody.
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00:06:43,740 --> 00:06:45,310
- Aw.
- See? That's why you don't need
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00:06:45,310 --> 00:06:47,247
- a girlfriend, Logan.
- Mom.
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00:06:47,247 --> 00:06:49,252
Now, Sam's letter to Mimi
was discovered
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00:06:49,252 --> 00:06:50,888
in the bedpost years later.
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00:06:50,888 --> 00:06:54,294
A cryptic clue from a dead
smuggler to a femme fatale.
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00:06:54,428 --> 00:06:57,535
"Our green friend--"
clearly, the jellyfish--
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00:06:57,535 --> 00:07:00,708
"has made a home
20 paces west of Poseidon."
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00:07:00,809 --> 00:07:02,846
Nearly everyone agrees
that "Poseidon,"
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00:07:02,946 --> 00:07:05,083
Greek god of the sea,
means the hiding spot
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00:07:05,183 --> 00:07:06,553
was 20 paces from the ocean,
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00:07:06,553 --> 00:07:08,958
and this almost certainly
refers to some nook
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00:07:08,958 --> 00:07:11,329
in the now filled-in
bootleggers' tunnel
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00:07:11,329 --> 00:07:12,698
which ran under Front Street.
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00:07:12,832 --> 00:07:14,468
If only he used
the hotel safe, right?
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00:07:14,570 --> 00:07:16,673
- [soft laughter]
- Yeah, that was funny.
200
00:07:16,774 --> 00:07:20,648
Now, if you'll follow me back
to our speakeasy/VIP lounge,
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00:07:20,648 --> 00:07:23,720
you can enjoy a complementary
Rumrunner's Blind Blackout--
202
00:07:23,720 --> 00:07:26,092
which I believe is apple juice--
or peruse
203
00:07:26,092 --> 00:07:28,730
our updated cocktail list
and light appetizer menu.
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00:07:28,730 --> 00:07:30,735
- [Edith] Is there a discount?
- [manager] There is not, but--
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00:07:30,735 --> 00:07:32,838
- [Edith] I'll take the juice.
- [manager] All right.
206
00:07:32,939 --> 00:07:34,643
Let's not stay.
I don't want to stay.
207
00:07:34,743 --> 00:07:35,978
Also, I have to pee.
Let's go.
208
00:07:35,978 --> 00:07:37,949
Bye. Bye.
So sorry we couldn't chat.
209
00:07:37,949 --> 00:07:39,619
- [groans]
- [Linda] Oh, there you are.
210
00:07:39,619 --> 00:07:41,823
Do you want to split
this tomato-feta thing with me?
211
00:07:41,823 --> 00:07:43,828
- [whispering] Mom.
Sorry. Listen.
- Ow, ow.
212
00:07:43,828 --> 00:07:45,163
- What?
- We know something
213
00:07:45,263 --> 00:07:48,236
about the Jade Jellyfish
that the manager doesn't.
214
00:07:48,336 --> 00:07:50,040
- That no one else knows.
- We-we do?
215
00:07:50,173 --> 00:07:51,208
- Yes.
- What?
216
00:07:51,208 --> 00:07:53,112
"Poseidon" doesn't mean the sea.
217
00:07:53,112 --> 00:07:55,885
It's got to be the Poseidon
statue near the ride.
218
00:07:55,885 --> 00:07:58,322
In Fischoeder's secret
clubhouse under the pier.
219
00:07:58,322 --> 00:08:00,026
The statue where
you pinch his nipples?
220
00:08:00,026 --> 00:08:03,433
Yes. We can go there and maybe
find the Jade Jellyfish.
221
00:08:03,433 --> 00:08:05,638
Find it? I-I don't know.
222
00:08:05,738 --> 00:08:06,940
Please? I need you.
223
00:08:06,940 --> 00:08:09,545
We're the Bootlegging
Flappy Bappies.
224
00:08:09,646 --> 00:08:11,884
We are? You and me?
Flappy Bappies?
225
00:08:11,984 --> 00:08:14,021
Flappin' together,
bappin' forever?
226
00:08:14,021 --> 00:08:14,956
Yeah, yeah, yeah. So?
227
00:08:14,956 --> 00:08:16,425
[whispers]
Okay, okay, let's do it.
228
00:08:16,526 --> 00:08:17,762
Let's go find
the Jolly Jellyfish.
229
00:08:17,762 --> 00:08:19,398
- [Louise] Jade.
- [Linda] Yeah.
230
00:08:19,398 --> 00:08:20,935
- Hmm.
- Okay, ready.
231
00:08:21,035 --> 00:08:22,505
You sure you don't have
to tinkle-dinkle?
232
00:08:22,605 --> 00:08:26,378
Ugh, yes. But, hey, Mom,
want to make $700,000?
233
00:08:26,479 --> 00:08:27,882
Ugh, you sound
just like your father.
234
00:08:27,982 --> 00:08:29,886
I am not selling vitamins
to my friends.
235
00:08:29,986 --> 00:08:31,823
No, Mom.
[indistinct whispering]
236
00:08:31,923 --> 00:08:33,359
And then...
[indistinct whispering]
237
00:08:33,359 --> 00:08:35,263
Did you brush your teeth today?
238
00:08:35,263 --> 00:08:36,666
Mom! No.
239
00:08:39,304 --> 00:08:42,143
So, yeah, we're gonna go
find Slippery Sam's Jellyfish
240
00:08:42,244 --> 00:08:43,681
in the under-pier.
241
00:08:43,681 --> 00:08:45,050
[Bob]
Linda, what are you
talking about?
242
00:08:45,150 --> 00:08:46,285
[whispering]
Louise thinks she can find
243
00:08:46,385 --> 00:08:47,555
this smuggler's Jellyfish thingy
244
00:08:47,689 --> 00:08:49,526
- they told us about on the tour.
- Okay.
245
00:08:49,660 --> 00:08:51,597
I know, I'm sure
it's long gone by now,
246
00:08:51,697 --> 00:08:53,668
but Bob,
we're doing a thing together.
247
00:08:53,668 --> 00:08:54,936
She wants to do it with me.
248
00:08:55,036 --> 00:08:56,540
We don't have
a lot of things like that,
249
00:08:56,540 --> 00:08:58,109
and this one
I didn't have to force at all.
250
00:08:58,209 --> 00:08:59,512
Remember when
I tried to make her watch
251
00:08:59,512 --> 00:09:00,981
Knots Landing reruns with me?
252
00:09:00,981 --> 00:09:02,552
- Mom. Come on.
- [regular volume] Okay.
253
00:09:02,552 --> 00:09:03,787
Okay, see you soon, bye.
254
00:09:03,787 --> 00:09:05,658
All right, come on. Here we go.
255
00:09:05,658 --> 00:09:06,927
Damn it. Who locks the door
256
00:09:07,027 --> 00:09:08,597
to a secret underground
clubhouse?
257
00:09:08,597 --> 00:09:10,033
No-fun poopheads, that's who.
258
00:09:10,033 --> 00:09:12,605
Hey, you want to go
get a hot dog or ice cream?
259
00:09:12,605 --> 00:09:13,807
Yes, that's it. Ice cream.
260
00:09:13,907 --> 00:09:15,376
- [cackles]
- Oh, great.
261
00:09:15,376 --> 00:09:17,348
- I'm hungry.
- No, that's another way
262
00:09:17,348 --> 00:09:19,185
to get into the under-pier.
263
00:09:19,185 --> 00:09:20,453
- Oh.
- Let's go.
264
00:09:20,554 --> 00:09:21,857
Ah... Ow!
265
00:09:21,857 --> 00:09:24,729
- It's a little cold
for ice cream.
- I don't think
266
00:09:24,729 --> 00:09:26,198
they're getting ice cream.
267
00:09:26,198 --> 00:09:27,467
But if they are, I want some.
268
00:09:27,568 --> 00:09:29,739
Ah, not before you've had
some growing food.
269
00:09:29,839 --> 00:09:32,144
Don't say "growing food."
Ugh!
270
00:09:32,144 --> 00:09:33,613
- Hi.
- Hello.
271
00:09:33,713 --> 00:09:35,818
Uh, can I get a sample
of the double-fudge nut blast?
272
00:09:35,818 --> 00:09:37,287
- Mom. Oh, my gosh.
- What?
273
00:09:37,387 --> 00:09:38,557
The weirdest thing--
we just saw
274
00:09:38,557 --> 00:09:40,594
Mr. Fischoeder,
your boss, right?
275
00:09:40,695 --> 00:09:42,197
- Yeah?
- He's over on the Wonder Wheel
276
00:09:42,197 --> 00:09:44,903
throwing paper airplanes
made out of ten dollar bills.
277
00:09:44,903 --> 00:09:46,973
Seriously?
I love ten dollar bills.
278
00:09:47,074 --> 00:09:49,178
- Be right back.
- You're a sneaky little
279
00:09:49,278 --> 00:09:52,350
- Slippery Sam, aren't you?
- I can be somewhat slippery.
280
00:09:52,350 --> 00:09:54,488
- Wow, look at that.
- After you?
281
00:09:54,488 --> 00:09:57,126
- Wait, no, I lied. After me.
- Yep, yep.
282
00:09:58,663 --> 00:10:00,601
[Teddy]
A Chinese dragon
made out of balloons?
283
00:10:00,601 --> 00:10:02,437
[Tina]
How is anyone gonna top this?
284
00:10:02,538 --> 00:10:04,475
- Nudity?
- Probably not.
- [clears throat]
285
00:10:04,576 --> 00:10:07,046
- Sorry.
- You guys like
showstopping finales?
286
00:10:07,046 --> 00:10:08,282
[Teddy]
I do.
287
00:10:08,282 --> 00:10:09,752
- [Tina] Whoa.
- Oh, my God.
288
00:10:09,752 --> 00:10:12,290
- Wow. That's impressive.
- Oh...
289
00:10:12,290 --> 00:10:13,326
You and I are gonna get married.
290
00:10:13,326 --> 00:10:14,795
- Oops.
- Who's next?
291
00:10:14,895 --> 00:10:17,836
Who's next? This is the most
amazing day of my life!
292
00:10:17,836 --> 00:10:19,706
You know, it's actually
kind of fun down here
293
00:10:19,706 --> 00:10:21,609
when no one's chasing you
and trying to murder you.
294
00:10:21,609 --> 00:10:23,146
I guess most places
are like that.
295
00:10:23,279 --> 00:10:25,383
So, the secret clubhouse
with the Poseidon statue
296
00:10:25,383 --> 00:10:28,523
will look just like a wall
with some crap around it.
297
00:10:28,623 --> 00:10:30,560
Oh, whoa,
I tripped on a seahorse.
298
00:10:30,560 --> 00:10:32,264
Aw, they're cute.
Except that one.
299
00:10:32,264 --> 00:10:33,767
Mom, come on. We're down here
300
00:10:33,868 --> 00:10:36,305
to find the Jade Jellyfish,
not to look at cute old things.
301
00:10:36,305 --> 00:10:39,010
You're right. Besides,
I can look at cute old things
302
00:10:39,010 --> 00:10:40,480
when we get home
and see your father.
303
00:10:40,581 --> 00:10:41,950
[laughs]
Good... That's a good...
304
00:10:42,050 --> 00:10:43,419
Know what?
Stop getting distracted.
305
00:10:43,419 --> 00:10:45,356
Right, right, right.
Aw, dead pigeon.
306
00:10:45,356 --> 00:10:47,360
- Mom!
- Yep, yep, yep, yep.
307
00:10:48,663 --> 00:10:50,333
[Tina]
Seems like one
we could have done outside.
308
00:10:50,333 --> 00:10:51,503
For those of us who have to mop
309
00:10:51,603 --> 00:10:53,039
- all this up later.
- Tina, shh.
310
00:10:53,139 --> 00:10:55,043
[Gene]
Whoa.
311
00:10:55,143 --> 00:10:58,149
- He just made
smoking cool again.
- Yeah.
312
00:10:58,249 --> 00:11:00,120
- [both] Wow.
- What?!
313
00:11:00,220 --> 00:11:01,221
He's amazing.
314
00:11:01,355 --> 00:11:04,529
I call it "Reincarnation's
Infinite Spirit."
315
00:11:04,529 --> 00:11:05,230
Heh. Okay.
316
00:11:05,230 --> 00:11:07,067
I do feel a little reincarnated.
317
00:11:07,067 --> 00:11:08,035
Wait till I go.
318
00:11:08,035 --> 00:11:09,806
Uh, excuse me, can-can I wash
319
00:11:09,906 --> 00:11:11,543
my flip flops in your sink?
320
00:11:11,643 --> 00:11:12,812
Uh, uh, uh...
321
00:11:12,912 --> 00:11:14,583
I-- Yeah, in the bathroom.
322
00:11:14,583 --> 00:11:16,151
Oh, never mind.
[snorting]
323
00:11:16,151 --> 00:11:18,657
I've got more spit
than I thought.
324
00:11:18,657 --> 00:11:19,526
- Gross.
- Mm.
325
00:11:19,526 --> 00:11:21,930
Ugh, why does
this secret clubhouse
326
00:11:21,930 --> 00:11:23,499
have to be so damn secret?
327
00:11:23,499 --> 00:11:24,969
Well, I think
the important thing is
328
00:11:25,069 --> 00:11:27,340
the Bootlegging Flappy
Bappies are having themselves
329
00:11:27,340 --> 00:11:28,810
quite an adventure.
330
00:11:28,810 --> 00:11:30,213
Can't we just be
the Bootleggers?
331
00:11:30,313 --> 00:11:31,448
The Bootlegging Belchers?
332
00:11:31,550 --> 00:11:33,554
No. Anyway, I'm glad
we're doing this,
333
00:11:33,687 --> 00:11:35,724
- no matter what happens.
- Oh, my God.
334
00:11:35,724 --> 00:11:38,096
The clubhouse. This is it.
The hatch! We found it.
335
00:11:38,196 --> 00:11:40,299
- Yay!
- Let's open this baby up.
336
00:11:40,399 --> 00:11:42,303
Somehow, from the outside...
337
00:11:42,403 --> 00:11:44,074
- [both grunting]
- [Logan] Mom, walk faster.
338
00:11:44,074 --> 00:11:45,745
- Dang it. Wait.
- We're gonna lose them, come on.
339
00:11:45,845 --> 00:11:47,681
- [shushes] Hold on.
- [Cynthia] These are
not good walking shoes...
340
00:11:47,681 --> 00:11:49,351
- Do you hear something?
- What? What?
341
00:11:49,351 --> 00:11:51,055
[Logan] You never bring
good walking shoes.
342
00:11:51,155 --> 00:11:53,226
I'm gonna buy you
some comfortable flats.
343
00:11:53,326 --> 00:11:54,328
Some sensible flats.
344
00:11:54,328 --> 00:11:55,864
Oh, no.
345
00:11:55,964 --> 00:11:58,571
- Logan?
- Oh. Hey, Louise.
346
00:11:58,571 --> 00:11:59,972
Hi, Linda.
347
00:11:59,972 --> 00:12:01,876
Quick, let's hit 'em over
the head with something heavy.
348
00:12:01,876 --> 00:12:05,016
- No, never mind.
- What? You can't just take
a great idea back like that.
349
00:12:08,189 --> 00:12:10,594
I can't believe you
followed us here, Logan.
350
00:12:10,694 --> 00:12:12,164
Wait, how did you know
to follow us here?
351
00:12:12,264 --> 00:12:13,967
Oh, just a little thing
called hearing you talk
352
00:12:13,967 --> 00:12:15,270
about finding
the Jade Jellyfish
353
00:12:15,370 --> 00:12:17,842
through the secret pipes
on the hotel tour thing.
354
00:12:17,842 --> 00:12:19,713
Damn it.
That's so sneaky.
355
00:12:19,713 --> 00:12:21,950
I have to respect it
but I also don't like you,
356
00:12:21,950 --> 00:12:23,252
so I-I'm at a loss here.
357
00:12:23,353 --> 00:12:25,423
You'll also be
at a loss when we find
358
00:12:25,524 --> 00:12:26,860
the jellyfish before you.
359
00:12:26,960 --> 00:12:29,030
Now, would you do me
a favor and-and just tell me
360
00:12:29,130 --> 00:12:30,500
where this Poseidon ride is?
361
00:12:30,500 --> 00:12:33,741
Uh, I mean, I think
Poseidon rode, like, a seahorse?
362
00:12:33,741 --> 00:12:35,844
So maybe that has something
to do with it?
363
00:12:35,844 --> 00:12:37,548
Seahorse, huh?
364
00:12:37,548 --> 00:12:39,051
But, ugh.
What am I saying?
365
00:12:39,051 --> 00:12:40,754
Why am I telling you
any of this?
366
00:12:40,754 --> 00:12:43,192
Wait, what? Oh.
Quiet, Louise.
367
00:12:43,293 --> 00:12:46,031
- Oh, Logan. What about
the seahorses we saw back--
- Mom!
368
00:12:46,031 --> 00:12:47,568
It's probably
not even down here.
369
00:12:47,668 --> 00:12:50,206
Let's just go home and be the
amount of rich we already are.
370
00:12:50,206 --> 00:12:52,277
We're leaving?
Oh, thank God. I need a shower.
371
00:12:52,377 --> 00:12:54,481
And you are definitely
doing a tubby tonight.
372
00:12:54,481 --> 00:12:55,984
- Mom!
- A bath, a bath.
373
00:12:56,084 --> 00:12:57,354
Idiots.
374
00:12:57,354 --> 00:12:58,523
Good thinking, Louise.
375
00:12:58,657 --> 00:13:00,126
You clever little
cutie patootie.
376
00:13:00,126 --> 00:13:01,161
Okay, come on.
377
00:13:01,161 --> 00:13:03,166
- Use that mom strength.
- [both grunting]
378
00:13:03,166 --> 00:13:05,638
Use your muscles, Mom.
Please. Come on.
379
00:13:05,638 --> 00:13:07,642
- [grunting]
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
380
00:13:07,642 --> 00:13:09,679
Wait a minute. 20 paces west.
381
00:13:09,779 --> 00:13:11,650
- What?
- The statue of Poseidon
382
00:13:11,650 --> 00:13:13,520
is right on the other side
of this hatch,
383
00:13:13,520 --> 00:13:14,989
- like, a few feet away.
- Yeah?
384
00:13:14,989 --> 00:13:17,662
So I'm realizing that based
on what side of the country
385
00:13:17,762 --> 00:13:19,532
we live on
and how the ocean works,
386
00:13:19,532 --> 00:13:21,301
20 paces west is that way.
387
00:13:21,301 --> 00:13:23,205
Outside the hatch.
We don't have to open it.
388
00:13:23,305 --> 00:13:25,243
Well, that's good, 'cause
that thing is not budging.
389
00:13:25,243 --> 00:13:27,113
That wall looks like
it's about 20 paces away.
390
00:13:27,214 --> 00:13:29,451
And it looks like it's been
around for at least 100 years.
391
00:13:29,451 --> 00:13:31,321
- It's got to be in there.
- Wait, in the wall?
392
00:13:31,421 --> 00:13:33,860
Yeah, in the wall.
Classic Slippery Sam.
393
00:13:33,960 --> 00:13:36,198
- Come on, come on, come on.
- Um, Louise?
394
00:13:36,198 --> 00:13:38,136
- The boards are cracking.
- Yeah.
395
00:13:38,136 --> 00:13:40,207
But not in, like,
too dangerous of a way.
396
00:13:40,307 --> 00:13:42,812
Oh my God. I-I think
these boards are rotten.
397
00:13:42,812 --> 00:13:44,949
Come on, Mom.
You know how old boards are.
398
00:13:44,949 --> 00:13:46,987
They crack.
It's part of their whole charm.
399
00:13:47,087 --> 00:13:49,826
- I-It's just--
- Look, we'll just walk
nice and easy, okay?
400
00:13:49,826 --> 00:13:51,261
See? [vocalizing]
401
00:13:51,261 --> 00:13:53,066
Okay, but one more crack
and we're out of here.
402
00:13:53,066 --> 00:13:54,902
- Fine.
- [board creaks]
403
00:13:54,902 --> 00:13:56,472
That was more of a creak.
404
00:13:56,573 --> 00:13:58,175
This is also very good.
405
00:13:58,175 --> 00:14:00,580
[Teddy]
Yeah. You think he just had
all those things with him?
406
00:14:00,580 --> 00:14:03,019
What?
He did not just do that.
407
00:14:03,119 --> 00:14:04,689
[muffled] Mm, I did do it.
Yeah, I did. I did it.
408
00:14:04,789 --> 00:14:06,860
At any moment, he could have
cut himself with the sword,
409
00:14:06,993 --> 00:14:08,864
taken a bite of the lightbulb,
dropped the apple
410
00:14:08,998 --> 00:14:10,467
on the ground,
and then it's all dirty.
411
00:14:10,467 --> 00:14:12,270
[Tina]
Damn.
412
00:14:12,370 --> 00:14:14,441
- Yeah.
- I think I'm gonna faint.
413
00:14:15,377 --> 00:14:18,049
And that is why I deserve
Giovanni's spot.
414
00:14:18,049 --> 00:14:19,519
- And they do not.
- [applause]
415
00:14:19,519 --> 00:14:21,154
Are you gonna finish that apple
416
00:14:21,255 --> 00:14:22,891
and/or can I play around
with your sword?
417
00:14:22,992 --> 00:14:24,896
- Sure, whatever. Here, catch.
- Yay!
418
00:14:24,896 --> 00:14:26,165
- No.
- Boo.
419
00:14:26,265 --> 00:14:28,537
20 paces from which seahorse?
420
00:14:28,537 --> 00:14:31,041
[groans] I guess
I'll have to do all of them.
421
00:14:31,041 --> 00:14:33,046
You seem cranky. Are you hungry?
422
00:14:33,046 --> 00:14:34,983
- I brought raisins.
- No.
423
00:14:34,983 --> 00:14:36,519
Okay, maybe a handful.
424
00:14:36,519 --> 00:14:38,489
Louise, I really want you
to come back.
425
00:14:38,489 --> 00:14:40,560
In a minute.
I'm just gonna try this way.
426
00:14:40,560 --> 00:14:42,396
Louise. I'd come grab you,
427
00:14:42,396 --> 00:14:44,134
but I'm too heavy and I'm
afraid we'd both fall through.
428
00:14:44,134 --> 00:14:46,371
So please walk your little
feet back towards me,
429
00:14:46,371 --> 00:14:48,543
slowly and carefully,
but also somehow quickly.
430
00:14:48,543 --> 00:14:51,315
I am walking back toward you,
but I got to go the long way,
431
00:14:51,415 --> 00:14:53,386
toward the wall,
which coincidentally
432
00:14:53,386 --> 00:14:55,422
is where the jellyfish is,
which is unrelated.
433
00:14:55,523 --> 00:14:58,362
I'm just walking back
towards you the long way, okay?
434
00:14:58,462 --> 00:15:00,032
Uh-oh.
435
00:15:00,032 --> 00:15:02,605
- Whoa!
- Louise!
436
00:15:02,705 --> 00:15:04,308
- Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
- Oh, no.
437
00:15:04,308 --> 00:15:05,343
We were so close.
438
00:15:05,443 --> 00:15:07,447
Okay, minor setback.
Let's think.
439
00:15:07,447 --> 00:15:09,919
Louise! We are not gonna
find the jellyfish!
440
00:15:10,019 --> 00:15:12,023
- What?
- I'm sorry, sweetie. I just--
441
00:15:12,023 --> 00:15:14,060
There's just no way
it's still down here.
442
00:15:14,161 --> 00:15:15,664
What do you mean?
The letter said--
443
00:15:15,664 --> 00:15:17,033
It's been 100 years.
444
00:15:17,133 --> 00:15:19,539
Things get bashed around
and filled in and washed away.
445
00:15:19,539 --> 00:15:22,043
It's just how it is with things.
I can barely find
446
00:15:22,176 --> 00:15:24,515
- my car keys when I need 'em.
- So this whole time,
447
00:15:24,515 --> 00:15:26,485
you never thought
we'd find the jellyfish?
448
00:15:26,586 --> 00:15:29,859
- I mean... Eh...
- Then w-what are we
doing down here?
449
00:15:29,859 --> 00:15:32,063
Aw, honey.
Having fun, right?
450
00:15:32,063 --> 00:15:33,833
The Bootlegging Flappy Bappies?
451
00:15:33,967 --> 00:15:36,371
No. No.
No Bootlegging Flappy Bappies.
452
00:15:36,371 --> 00:15:38,810
You've just been lying
to me this whole time.
453
00:15:38,810 --> 00:15:39,813
I'm sorry.
454
00:15:39,913 --> 00:15:41,448
You're a bootlegging
flappy liar!
455
00:15:41,583 --> 00:15:44,154
Louise, no.
Ugh, another dead pigeon.
456
00:15:47,528 --> 00:15:49,699
I can't believe this whole time
you were just
457
00:15:49,799 --> 00:15:51,001
playing pretend with me.
458
00:15:51,001 --> 00:15:53,038
- Like I'm a child.
- I mean, you are a child.
459
00:15:53,038 --> 00:15:54,576
I'm not a child. I'm nine.
460
00:15:54,576 --> 00:15:56,846
Listen, it's been so great
spending the day with you,
461
00:15:56,846 --> 00:15:58,850
seeing you so excited.
When you have kids,
462
00:15:58,850 --> 00:16:01,355
you'll see how happy it makes
you to see your kids happy.
463
00:16:01,355 --> 00:16:03,326
We were doing it together,
you and me.
464
00:16:03,326 --> 00:16:05,296
We had a thing,
something we could share.
465
00:16:05,396 --> 00:16:07,200
Until it almost got you killed.
466
00:16:07,333 --> 00:16:08,670
I just...
467
00:16:08,770 --> 00:16:10,908
I know it's there, Mom.
I know it.
468
00:16:11,008 --> 00:16:13,980
Huh. You really
believe that, don't you?
469
00:16:13,980 --> 00:16:15,684
Yes. I do.
470
00:16:16,519 --> 00:16:17,555
Okay.
471
00:16:17,555 --> 00:16:19,725
Okay?
Like, okay okay?
472
00:16:19,859 --> 00:16:21,028
- Yes. [groans]
- [gasps]
473
00:16:21,128 --> 00:16:22,397
Damn your sweet
little face full of hope.
474
00:16:22,497 --> 00:16:24,602
If you really believe it, then...
475
00:16:24,602 --> 00:16:27,240
I'm gonna believe it, too.
Maybe. Sort of.
476
00:16:27,340 --> 00:16:28,977
But if you die, you and I
are going to have
477
00:16:28,977 --> 00:16:30,714
big problems, lady.
Big problems.
478
00:16:30,714 --> 00:16:33,519
- Okay, yeah.
- All right, I think
I have an idea.
479
00:16:33,519 --> 00:16:37,260
I'm a little terrified
about what this is gonna be.
480
00:16:37,393 --> 00:16:38,897
What is dripping
out of those pipes?
481
00:16:38,997 --> 00:16:40,800
- Let's call it water.
- Mm.
482
00:16:41,936 --> 00:16:44,140
♪ ♪
483
00:17:13,299 --> 00:17:15,236
- Damn.
- Oh, my God.
484
00:17:15,236 --> 00:17:16,806
I'm crying, I'm crying.
485
00:17:16,906 --> 00:17:18,510
- So he wins?
- Yeah.
486
00:17:18,510 --> 00:17:20,514
Yeah. Giovanni's spot
is all yours, Pipe Guy.
487
00:17:20,614 --> 00:17:21,716
You beautiful freak.
488
00:17:21,816 --> 00:17:25,089
Thank you all. But, honestly,
we should share it.
489
00:17:25,189 --> 00:17:26,559
- What?
- Yeah, what?
490
00:17:26,659 --> 00:17:28,362
- Then what the hell
was all of this?
- Tina, calm down.
491
00:17:28,463 --> 00:17:31,235
I really just want Thursday
mornings and Sunday afternoons.
492
00:17:31,235 --> 00:17:34,842
- You sure you want to do that?
- It's what Giovanni
would have wanted.
493
00:17:34,842 --> 00:17:37,180
And I should know.
He was my Dad.
494
00:17:37,180 --> 00:17:39,184
- He was?
- What?!
- Okay, probably not.
495
00:17:39,184 --> 00:17:40,453
But let's just share the spot.
496
00:17:40,554 --> 00:17:42,190
I've written out
a schedule for you.
497
00:17:42,190 --> 00:17:43,960
It's-it's on a pipe, but still.
498
00:17:43,960 --> 00:17:46,498
- Seems fair.
- Works for me.
- Yeah, I can work with this.
499
00:17:46,633 --> 00:17:48,469
Wow, great. Now, uh,
now that that's settled,
500
00:17:48,603 --> 00:17:50,106
can, uh, can I bring
you guys some lunch?
501
00:17:50,106 --> 00:17:51,742
- You guys want
to split a burger?
- All right.
502
00:17:51,842 --> 00:17:54,549
- Sure.
- Okay.
- So one burger, split four ways?
503
00:17:54,682 --> 00:17:55,918
Well, there's four of us.
504
00:17:55,918 --> 00:17:57,253
I'll split it.
I got the sword.
505
00:17:57,253 --> 00:17:59,191
Maybe five ways?
I would have some.
506
00:17:59,191 --> 00:18:01,362
This was a great idea, Mom.
507
00:18:01,462 --> 00:18:02,731
[groans]
I hate this idea.
508
00:18:02,731 --> 00:18:04,735
Leaving is a good idea,
but we're doing this.
509
00:18:04,735 --> 00:18:06,204
Yep. Yep we are.
510
00:18:06,204 --> 00:18:08,075
[groans] Can't I be the one
to go out on the board?
511
00:18:08,208 --> 00:18:10,714
Uh, no, you weigh
more than me, remember?
512
00:18:10,714 --> 00:18:13,151
Stupid adult body.
513
00:18:15,557 --> 00:18:16,926
[groans, moans]
514
00:18:17,026 --> 00:18:19,331
Okay, yeah,
just checking the panels.
515
00:18:19,331 --> 00:18:22,470
How long are we gonna do this?
Like, like, five more seconds?
516
00:18:22,470 --> 00:18:24,374
Where are you?
517
00:18:24,374 --> 00:18:25,877
[gasps]
518
00:18:26,679 --> 00:18:28,248
[gasps]
519
00:18:29,050 --> 00:18:29,852
Ha! I mean, shh.
520
00:18:29,852 --> 00:18:31,355
- Mom. Mom! Look.
- What?
521
00:18:31,455 --> 00:18:34,094
- Holy crap.
- [laughs] Ooh! Shh. Shh.
522
00:18:34,194 --> 00:18:36,632
Keep it down.
Mom, keep it down, but look.
523
00:18:36,632 --> 00:18:38,670
Okay, okay, time to come back.
Come, come, come, come.
524
00:18:38,770 --> 00:18:41,475
I knew it. I knew it. I was
right and you were wrong.
525
00:18:41,475 --> 00:18:43,311
- You thought I was just a child.
- Uh-huh. Okay, okay.
You were right.
526
00:18:43,411 --> 00:18:44,749
- Oh, my gosh.
- You were right.
Let, Let's just not
527
00:18:44,749 --> 00:18:46,284
fall into the ocean
and drown to death.
528
00:18:46,384 --> 00:18:47,921
You were like, "Oh, I'll
just pretend around her,"
529
00:18:47,921 --> 00:18:49,558
- but it's real.
- Louise.
530
00:18:49,558 --> 00:18:51,963
- Will you ever doubt me again?
- No, no, no.
531
00:18:51,963 --> 00:18:54,000
- Eh, I don't know, maybe.
- It's amazing.
532
00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:56,171
- Put it under your coat.
- Oh, ooh.
533
00:18:56,272 --> 00:18:58,008
Oop, oof.
Ooh, it's squishing my boob.
534
00:18:58,108 --> 00:19:00,212
Dang it. Where is it?
[groans]
535
00:19:00,212 --> 00:19:01,983
You know, we could probably find
536
00:19:01,983 --> 00:19:03,520
some bootlegger treasure
on eBay.
537
00:19:03,620 --> 00:19:05,089
- You think so?
- I'm gonna say yes.
538
00:19:05,089 --> 00:19:06,960
- More raisins?
- Thanks, Mom.
539
00:19:06,960 --> 00:19:10,166
All right, all we got to do now
is get past the ice cream kid.
540
00:19:10,266 --> 00:19:12,638
Follow my lead,
and we'll be jade in the shade.
541
00:19:12,638 --> 00:19:14,709
- [Fischoeder] Hello.
- [both] Aah!
542
00:19:14,809 --> 00:19:17,714
You, uh, take any good
bootlegger tours lately?
543
00:19:17,714 --> 00:19:19,719
- Hmm. I-I don't think so.
- Heh. Yeah, I-I hate tours.
544
00:19:19,719 --> 00:19:21,589
You weren't scurrying
around under there
545
00:19:21,689 --> 00:19:23,425
looking for my jade jellyfish,
were you?
546
00:19:23,425 --> 00:19:25,897
Your Jade Jellyfish?
That belonged to Slippery Sam.
547
00:19:25,897 --> 00:19:28,836
Um, if-- It-it would
if it-if it was still there,
548
00:19:28,936 --> 00:19:31,576
or if I-- You know, I don't even
know what you're talking about.
549
00:19:31,676 --> 00:19:34,046
As owner of this property,
you should understand,
550
00:19:34,180 --> 00:19:36,752
if it were there,
it would belong to me.
551
00:19:36,752 --> 00:19:39,123
Unrelated: have you got
something under your coat?
552
00:19:39,123 --> 00:19:40,994
- Her boobs?
- Three of them?
- Don't judge.
553
00:19:41,094 --> 00:19:44,167
- Come on, give it. Give it here.
- Sorry, hon.
- [groans]
554
00:19:44,167 --> 00:19:45,937
Oh, you're gonna make
Fischy so much money.
555
00:19:46,037 --> 00:19:48,442
Yes, you are. Yes, you are.
556
00:19:48,543 --> 00:19:50,079
- Well, it's worth nothing.
- Wait, what?
557
00:19:50,079 --> 00:19:52,183
Yes, I had the Jade Jellyfish appraised.
558
00:19:52,183 --> 00:19:54,187
And, oddly enough,
it's not made out of jade.
559
00:19:54,187 --> 00:19:55,991
- [groans]
- Does it even have jelly in it?
560
00:19:56,091 --> 00:19:59,231
The Dyed Quartz Jellyfish
would be a more accurate name.
561
00:19:59,331 --> 00:20:01,468
- Aw.
- There was a lot
of that going around
562
00:20:01,468 --> 00:20:03,573
back in the Jade Craze Days.
563
00:20:03,573 --> 00:20:06,545
But I sold it to that
rube manager at the hotel
564
00:20:06,545 --> 00:20:08,281
for him to use
as part of his tour.
565
00:20:08,281 --> 00:20:11,589
After some fierce negotiating,
we settled on $100.
566
00:20:11,589 --> 00:20:13,760
And since you found it,
I'm giving you half.
567
00:20:13,760 --> 00:20:15,496
Yes! I get 50 bucks.
568
00:20:15,496 --> 00:20:17,133
- Minus expenses.
- Expenses?
569
00:20:17,233 --> 00:20:19,605
I had to invest
in locks for the hatches
570
00:20:19,605 --> 00:20:21,576
to the under-pier,
thank you very much.
571
00:20:21,576 --> 00:20:23,412
And I had to get
a fun keychain for the keys.
572
00:20:23,412 --> 00:20:25,415
Look, it's a little palm tree.
Don't touch it.
573
00:20:25,415 --> 00:20:28,757
Anyway, I deducted those costs,
and this is for you.
574
00:20:28,757 --> 00:20:30,393
- $17.
- Okey dokey.
575
00:20:30,493 --> 00:20:32,230
- It's something.
- Now, be a lamb
and stop trespassing
576
00:20:32,230 --> 00:20:35,035
- on my property, okay?
- [Gene] No!
577
00:20:35,136 --> 00:20:36,573
- Bye.
- Mom, we're pretty good at this.
578
00:20:36,573 --> 00:20:39,210
You know what I'm thinking?
You, me, Lost City of Atlantis.
579
00:20:39,310 --> 00:20:41,348
I bet it's in Atlanta.
Has anyone looked there?
580
00:20:41,481 --> 00:20:44,087
I don't know. Maybe?
When's your spring break?
581
00:20:44,087 --> 00:20:46,191
Or maybe just find
some more, uh, you know,
582
00:20:46,191 --> 00:20:49,230
- walking-distance treasures,
closer to...
- Don't be jealous.
583
00:20:49,330 --> 00:20:51,101
So Louise, what are you gonna
spend your money on?
584
00:20:51,201 --> 00:20:53,774
I think I know
what I'm gonna do with it.
585
00:20:53,774 --> 00:20:55,910
♪ ♪
586
00:21:00,988 --> 00:21:02,390
♪ Flappy Bappies ♪
587
00:21:02,390 --> 00:21:04,762
♪ Flappy Bappies,
Flappy Bappies ♪
588
00:21:04,862 --> 00:21:06,298
♪ Flappy Bappies ♪
589
00:21:06,298 --> 00:21:08,503
♪ Flappy Bappies,
Flappy Bappies ♪
590
00:21:08,503 --> 00:21:12,209
♪ Bootlegging Flappy Bappies ♪
591
00:21:12,209 --> 00:21:15,482
♪ Ah... ♪
592
00:21:15,482 --> 00:21:19,124
♪ Flappin' together ♪
593
00:21:19,224 --> 00:21:23,132
♪ Bappin' forever ♪
594
00:21:23,132 --> 00:21:25,637
♪ Flappy Bappies ♪
595
00:21:25,637 --> 00:21:27,541
♪ Flappy Bappies,
Flappy Bappies ♪
596
00:21:27,541 --> 00:21:29,244
♪ Flappy Bappies ♪
597
00:21:29,244 --> 00:21:30,947
♪ Flappy Bappies,
Flappy Bappies ♪
598
00:21:30,947 --> 00:21:33,719
♪ Bootlegging Flappy Ba... ♪
599
00:21:33,819 --> 00:21:34,922
Captioning sponsored by
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600
00:21:35,022 --> 00:21:36,039
and TOYOTA.
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