All language subtitles for Run the Burbs s03e11 Holi-Day Phun.eng

So, who wants to tell me
what happened?

(coughing)

Sorry. I had some purple
in my mouth.

Same. Can I get a glass
of water, please?

? wait, wait a minute,
that's right, uh ?

? I'm unstoppable,
I'm on-top-able ?

? I'm a-rock-able ?

Camille: Ooh.
Pass the champagne, please.

? I'm unbreakable,
unmistakeable ?

Mmm!

Andrew, this guac is incredible.

Oh, thank you.

But I'm not the excellent chef
we should be focusing on.

Yeah. Celebrate me, giving birth
to my cookbook.

I can't believe it's going to be
in my hands so soon.

Then in a billion more hands.

And I hope you all are ready
to get your holi celebraysh on

At the launch party tomorrow.

I'm picturing it's going to be
like a rainbow exploded.

Whoa.

I haven't celebrayshed
since we went to india.

It must be 30 years.

Yes. I think about that trip
a lot.

Remember how much mom loved it?

So did you,
when you weren't crying

About getting powder
in your eyes.

(laughing)

I'm actually going to read
that story about mom

At the cookbook launch tomorrow.

That's why I wanted it to be on

The actual day of holi.

She deserves to be celebrated.

Camille, that is lovely.

Khia: Stop taking my things!
You're so annoying.

Oh, my god. Again?

- Leo: Just leave me alone.
- No. I got this.

Since they've been
fighting so much,

I've been reading up on
techniques to deal with teens.

- Soundproofing?
- A lot of this.

Stop, drop and roll.

Stop and take a deep breath.

Drop the energy level,

And roll into understanding
the situation.

Khia:
Oh, yeah?

Stop. I'm cool as a ranch.

Leo:
Worst sister ever.

Well, cheers.

- To camille.
- (glasses clinking)

Hmm. Me.

- (shouting)
- hey.

How about we stop
and drop the energy level

And talk this out, huh?

- Give it.
- You're hurting me!

Quiet coyote, huh?
Look at the coyote.

Tell khia to get out of
my world!

No. Tell the little turd
to get out of my life.

Leo? Okay. Enough pulling.
You'll break them.

Ugh! (thudding)

Thank you.

Are you feeling upset because

You're not getting enough
attention from mom and dad?

What? No.

He can't just barge into
my room and take my things.

- Like it's even a big deal.
- Hey.

- Okay, okay.
- (doorbell ringing)

Hey, hey, hey.

This conversation is not over,

But now is the time for us all
to be together as a family.

Let's go down and support mom.
Huh?

Okay.

Love and respect

For all those around us
on three. Huh?

One, two, three.

Hey! I said "love and respect."

You're such a baby!

You must be madeline.

Camille has said so many
amazing things about you.

Well, she's been a dream
to work with.

Are you ready, camille?

I can't believe
it's finally happening.

Oh, my god. Okay.

Introducing
simmer 'til it glimmers.

(everyone cheering
and applauding)

It's perfect.

Wow.

Aw. To mom.

Oh. What is the
safety pin about?

So, when my mom passed,

I used to see them
in the most random places.

It's like she was telling me
she's still with me.

Ah. I love a supportive
ghost mom.

So, tomorrow's going to be
easy-peasy.

I've invited vip influencers
and press.

- They will get the word out.
- Get that buzz buzzing.

And how about the food stuff?

We can still hire a caterer,
you know.

No. I want to do the recipes
justice, so I am happy to do it.

Of course.
Oh, about the coloured powder?

My intern had trouble
sourcing it,

So do you mind if we sub in
powdered fabric dye?

Uh, no. That could blind people.

Oh. Well, that's not good.

- (laughing nervously)
- they won't buy the book, then.

- Yeah.
- Oh. I am sorry.

I have to take this.
I will see you tomorrow.

Do not worry, okay?

And congrats. You did, really,
a hell of a thing.

Okay, great. Cool.

Yeah, yeah. No, madeline.
Got it.

I, um, think.

Okay.
I have to cook for tomorrow.

- Can you be on the holi powder?
- I got you.

- Okay.
- Hey, kids?

Go do a search
for homemade holi powder.

Okay. Come on.

Good girl.

This works out great, huh?

Unite them in a task

And then their feelings
may open.

It's another technique
called the touchy-feelies.

Oh. Maybe don't say the name
to them.

Okay. And dad,

You're good to go to the venue
tomorrow morning

To drop off the food
while I get ready?

- Naturally.
- Okay.

I actually have to return
a faulty loofah

That I bought right near there.
Where did I put that?

Okay. And, um, tomorrow's
major industry vibe,

So I'm going to need you

On teeth, on wardrobe, on hair.

Done. Look at you. Author, chef,
get-her-done extraordinaire.

- (laughing)
- (phone chiming)

Oh. It's gloria.

Oh, lucky. I'm the lawyer
for good morning gloria

And I haven't even met her yet.

"how get merlot
out of silk pjs?"

I think she's confusing me
for a search engine.

Look at you. National treasure
sliding into your dms like that.

Yeah. Well, she is my boss,

But nice enough to write a blurb
for the book.

Oh. Do you think
she's coming tomorrow?

I can't imagine
she has the time,

But that's okay. She is a lot.

(phone chiming)

Uh, "squeezing make it worst."

It does, though.

So,

Did mom tell you
what holi's all about?

Celebrating the divine love

Between the gods krishna
and radha.

And chucking butt-loads
of powder in khia's face.

Andrew:
No.

It's about loving each other,
like all good holidays.

Except
national grilled cheese day.

That day, it's just for you.

So, you want to tell me
what's really happening

Between you two?

She's mad because I recorded

Randomly scaring her
a few times.

He popped out from my closet,

And then another time,
from under my bed.

I waited a whole hour
under there.

And from the bathroom.

Whoa. The bathroom, leo?

I jumped out before she even got
in there. It was my finest work.

It was totally inappropriate.

Well, it's not my fault.

I will literally murder you
if you say another word.

Hey! (chuckling) chill.

I need space.

Well, I need space, too.

Hey. You two are going to love
each other tomorrow,

No matter what! You hear?

(doors slamming)

(sighing)

Ah. This isn't going to work.

Amazon, please have holi powder.

Hmm. Yes.

Put it in the cart!

? I think you're something ?

? do you feel
what I'm feeling, too ?

Okay.

Ooh!

Okay.

Oh. Great.

Hi. Soren.
Intern with the publisher.

- I'm camille.
- Sam.

Um, did you bring
the holi powder?

Oh, no. My husband's bringing
that later.

Uh, where's madeline?

I haven't been able to reach her
all day.

She's not coming.

Um, she had a 911
with another author.

Okay, but she's supposed
to be here

To make sure
everything goes okay.

Why does my forehead
look like that?

Uh, what is that?

- Sam: Gloria.
- And what is that?

"a tasty read!
Gloria thompson-mathers."

Uh, that's standard
for first runs.

Okay, but it's right over
my mom's face.

All of them are.

Oh, I'm sure
this comes right off.

This could be my copy.

Camille:
Okay. "maritime spice goddess."

Soren, where are my friends
and family sitting?

They didn't invite
your guest list.

What?

They wanted more influencers.
I didn't do it.

Soren, I need you to make
the front row my family.

Okay.

Yeah.

By the way,
where is your family?

They are coming. They're coming.

When did you get home?
Where's leo?

He wanted to walk home
from taekwondo.

I gave you the van
so you could pick him up.

What if he goes missing?

I guess that'd be a shame?

Yes! Yes, it would.

(door closing)

She took off on me.

Khia!

What? He was talking to
his friends and made me wait.

I have things to do.

- No, you don't.
- Cool it.

Leo, shower.
You smell like armpit.

Go get ready.

You, too. And I know
it's delicious, but save room.

Mom's going to have
all that food there.

(door closing)

Fine.

Did you dip the chip
and put it back in--

Cool as a ranch.
Cool as a ranch.

Camille:
Oh, dad.

So, where's the food?

- I had it all in the car.
- Mm-hmm?

But then, I jaunted across
the street to return my loofah.

And I'd forgotten my receipt.
I went back, but...

Oh, my god.

...The car was halfway
up the block being towed.

Someone must have put
a fire hydrant beside it.

Uh, my food is gone?

My wallet was in the car.

You know what?
Give me your credit card.

- I'll fix this.
- Hmm?

You know, never mind. Uh, sam?

You have 10 minutes.

Leo:
What the hell?

Dad!

Andrew:
Damn. That's a lot of ankle.

Did you have a growth spurt?

I don't think so.

I accept responsibility
for this.

You broke my headphones.

So, you butchered my pants?

Pantses, plural.
Top five in your rotation.

Come on, khia!

Leo, find something else.

Mom needs us
and the holi powder.

We will resolve all of this
later.

Fine, but this boy's unfixable.

This man is unfixable. Wait.

Behave, or else.

Fast and firm consequences.

No car, and you're both on

Shower-drain hair-removal duty
for two months.

Aw, come on!

I mean it.

Love on three.

(doors slamming)

Love.

Gloria:
It's gloria! I've arrived.

Oh, okay. Get-get-get.
(laughing)

Gloria. You came.

Well, my schedule
suddenly freed up,

And I wanted to come out
and support.

- (laughing)
- (gasping) oh.

Look at us. Oh, I love it.

Mm-hmm.

Oh.

Enjoy this moment.

We are all here for one reason,

And that's you.

- (chuckling)
- (laughing)

Hello, everyone!

- (applauding)
- (laughing)

The random chaos of the universe
really does hate me.

(sighing)

Camille: Andrew,
I am starting to lose it.

Gloria is sucking up
all the air in the room

And I don't recognize anyone
in here.

Hey. Remember our wedding day?

We ordered that ice sculpture
that looked like us

And the freezer was broken,

And it ended up looking like
vin diesel as a walrus?

Camille:
Yeah, of course.

Everyone loved it.

Exactly. It was unexpected, but
it still turned out memorable.

Everything will be all right.

(khia screaming)

Leo, I'm going to kill you!

- (pounding on door)
- what's going on?

That was nothing.
Got it under control.

Okay. Be there soon.
Love you so much. Bye.

- Khia: Take it down now.
- Leo: No. You deserve it.

- Khia, what's going on?
- Nothing!

(phone chiming)

Is it leo's bathroom
scare video?

Leo:
(laughing) yeah.

Dad, don't watch it!

Was that what I think it was?

Leo:
Yup.

She was so scared, she sharted.

(crying)

You have nothing
to be ashamed of.

Everyone sharts.

- (door closing)
- (sighing)

There better be an article
for this.

(hindi pop music playing)

Sam:
Hair, teeth, smell. Superb.

Okay.

Okay. One orderly line.
No cutsies.

I'm cookie, influencer

And good morning gloria
enthusiast.

Oh. Well, thank you.

I've heard things
are going terribly

Over at the show.

Uh, no. Everything's great.
Do you want me to sign?

Sure. Is gloria signing, too?

Uh, and that is your time.

There you go.

That was weird.

Yeah. Those youtubers,
they're a different breed.

Uh-huh.

Oh!

Well, well, well. Of course.

- Sam?
- Hmm?

- Move.
- What?

- What?
- Move, sam. Sam?

Sam, move.

Is gloria signing my book?

You need to shut this down.

You got it.

Gloria:
Oh, hello.

Aren't you lovely?

Wow. Gloria.

You smell so good.

- Camille--
- mm-hmm?

Oh, camille. She, um--

Camille signs.

You? Mmm, no. No, no.

Me no-no sign?

Oh. (gasping)

Oh, I didn't mean to offend.

It's just I can never say no
to a fan.

You don't happen to be one,
do you?

Yeah, yeah.

Well, how about I give you
a little "I'm sorry"?

(laughing)

There we go.

(laughing)

I'm sorry.

(sighing)

Leo, the sibling bond
is not to be squandered.

Please make amends
with your sister.

Khia, this moment is but a drop

In the big bucket of life.

Leo, you did not ask
for your sister's consent

To post a video.

This is wrong.

I promise you
this will blow over.

Ask yourself if this is
the kind of young man

You want to be.

(phone ringing)

Babe, we are out the door.

Your mother pushed you both
out of her vagina

For a combined 17 hours!

Today is not about you.

Okay. How much will it take?

(hindi pop music playing)

Camille:
You've got to be kidding me.

These are recipe adjacent,

Because you use
a lot of veggies, right?

Sure. Whatever.

I'm sorry, camille.

(sighing) no food.

No kids. No husband.

But I get gloria.

I mean, who wears white
to a book launch

When you're not the author?

Seems to me
she's looking for attention.

(camille sighing)

Perhaps I can attend to her.
I've got this.

Hello. Ramesh devani.
I'm camille's father.

Pleasure to meet you.

- (glasses clinking)
- well, thanks, daddy.

(both laughing)

Uh, well,
thank you for being here.

You've added quite the energy.

Oh. Well, I love
that they love me.

Do you know that

My producers told me
to get fillers

To look younger, or else?

Fools. You look very young and,
may I say, quite fetching.

Oh.

I myself was recently

Forced to retire early
by my faculty.

Sons of bitches.

They forcing people to retire
at 50 now?

(both laughing)

Oh, you're fun.

Hi. Um, so, you were actually

Supposed to do
the reading first.

Uh, that's on me.
Could you do that now?

Uh, well, my family
is just like--

- They're almost here.
- (laughing) yeah.

They're getting mad.

Cam, I know this is
a flaming dumpster fire

For your expectations,
but you got this.

Hey. For you and for your mom.

Yeah, okay, okay. Okay.

Okay.

Oh.

(cheering and applause)

(laughing nervously)

Um, thank you, everyone,
for being here.

My mom and her family
would make falooda

For the entire neighbourhood
on holi,

Which you could've been enjoying
right now,

But, um, I digress.

"it was my first time
celebrating holi in india,

"and I was so excited.

"my mom always talked about
the huge colourful battle.

"it felt like Halloween,
christmas,

And national grilled cheese day
all in one."

(laughing)

"so, when I woke up that day
with food poisoning,

My hopes were crushed."

(sam and gloria laughing)

- Sam!
- (gasping)

Um, where's my dad?

Oh, yes. Um, I asked him

To go fetch some whisky,

Because there's barely
a selection.

Okay. What are you doing? I--

Go, go, go. Go, go, go.

Hello, everyone.

You all need to
just buy this book

And support this one over here.

Because the network

Is cleaning house,

And I just got booted off
my own show.

What?

So, peameal here--

Beep-boop! Doesn't have a tv job
no more.

- (laughing) boom.
- Um--

Did I just get fired?

Yes.

You'll land on your feet,
gloria.

(chanting) gloria. Gloria.

Gloria. Gloria. Gloria.

Gloria. Gloria. Gloria. Gloria.

They got rid of all of this.

The number-one morning show
in the nation,

2004 to 2007.

Andrew: We made it. We made it.
We're here. We're here!

We are here.

The holi powder is here.

(andrew laughing nervously)

We all love you and each other.

Leo:
Go.

Sam:
Why are you late?

Parenting. That's why.

Also, do you have some cash
I could have?

I owe the kids bribe money.

No, sorry.
I gave my wallet to ramesh

- So he could buy some hooch.
- Oh.

Let me tell you how I got
my job in the first place.

This is a funny story, actually.

(exhaling sharply)

I was 21 years old--

(heart pounding)

(sighing)

(laughing)

Gloria:
But I personally--

Uh, gloria? I got this.

Um, the gist of
the rest of my story?

My mom taught me the importance
of letting go of expectations

Because, um, if you don't,

You might miss the
best parts of life.

And when I was feeling better,
my mom declared

A holi redo,

And, um, my cousins pummelled me
with powder.

It was the happiest day
of my life.

Uh, so, you see,

My mom taught me the value

In finding the fun
wherever I was.

So, um, with that--

Hmm?

Man:
No, no!

- (gasping)
- (laughing)

(laughing)

This day is about celebrating

With the people we love,

And I see a few
I'd like to smush

With my love right about now.

- Soren: Uh, no. No, no, no.
- (andrew cackling)

No. This is for outside.

Does no one care about
the rental agreement?

Ah.

Ah. Thank you.

I'm still waiting.

Okay. I started this.

I wanted today to be
perfect, but I forgot

That perfect
usually looks like this.

The property manager's
going to have to fine you.

Oh, I'm sure it's not
that big of a problem, is it?

How about a selfie?

I'll take an autographed book.

Oh, sure. Where's a pen?

No, by her. I love your stuff.

Oh. Sure.
I would love to do that for you.

Look. Camille, I'm sorry.

I was just trying to get
one more big whiff of fame

Before everyone forgets
who I am.

No one would forget about you.
You're a legend.

Hmm. You're right.

Maybe I'll start my own network,

Or buy an island.

Now, where is ramesh
with that whisky?

Hey, mom?
We're sorry for being late.

It's really cool
you're an author.

And thanks for the 17 hours
of labour

To bring us into this world.

You're welcome.
You two figure things out?

Forgiving is living.

Plus dad bribed us with cash.

Love.

Right.

Home?

Sure. I'm starving.

Hey. Okay.

Surprise!

What is this?

A book launch do-over.

Chef deserves her favourite
guilty-pleasure meal.

Nashville hot chicken
from tony clucks?

You know it.

Sorry we weren't there
for most of today.

Yeah, mom,
and we're all proud of you.

And I picked up
some more bubbly.

I'm sorry
I biffed it so hard today.

I'm proud of you, buddy.

I too am very proud of
everything you've accomplished.

Oh.

And I'm sorry for
my behaviour today.

Even if today didn't go
exactly as planned,

I am really happy to have
you troublemakers by my side.

A toast to the chef slash author

Slash babe of my dreams.

And, um, to mom.

- Naniji.
- Cheers.

- Cheers.
- (glasses clinking)

Mmm.

Gloria's asking to pop by.

Absolutely not.

All right. Dibs on drumsticks.

- Mmm.
- Do we get dessert?

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