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1
00:00:08,142 --> 00:00:10,544
Jenkins is dead.
2
00:00:10,644 --> 00:00:13,847
"Hal Jenkins
of Manhattan died today
3
00:00:13,947 --> 00:00:15,216
"at the age of 106."
4
00:00:15,316 --> 00:00:16,584
Wow.
5
00:00:16,684 --> 00:00:17,885
Just goes to show you,
huh, sir?
6
00:00:17,985 --> 00:00:19,887
One day you're here,
and...
7
00:00:19,987 --> 00:00:20,988
A century later...
8
00:00:22,823 --> 00:00:24,192
Poof.
9
00:00:24,292 --> 00:00:25,493
Makes you think.
10
00:00:26,260 --> 00:00:27,661
Guess how he died,
Mike.
11
00:00:27,761 --> 00:00:29,963
Snapped in half
and crumbled into
a ball of dust?
12
00:00:31,399 --> 00:00:33,601
He was jogging
on the treadmill at my club
13
00:00:33,701 --> 00:00:36,270
and fell over.
Do you know
what this means?
14
00:00:36,370 --> 00:00:38,539
An old guy got
flung across the room?
15
00:00:39,440 --> 00:00:41,975
No. Well, yes.
16
00:00:42,076 --> 00:00:45,246
But it also means
there is an opening
at Cabot House.
17
00:00:45,346 --> 00:00:46,680
Sir, with all due
respect, you know,
18
00:00:46,780 --> 00:00:49,750
they probably
haven't pried Jenkins
out of the wall yet.
19
00:00:50,818 --> 00:00:51,985
Well, you know how I feel
about your club.
20
00:00:52,086 --> 00:00:54,788
It's elitist,
it's exclusionary,
it's snobbish...
21
00:00:54,888 --> 00:00:57,024
Why do you think
it's so hard
to get in?
22
00:00:58,292 --> 00:01:00,594
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
23
00:01:20,481 --> 00:01:22,150
All right.
Listen up.
24
00:01:27,421 --> 00:01:28,822
Thank you!
25
00:01:30,358 --> 00:01:31,392
I want everyone
to stay away from
26
00:01:31,492 --> 00:01:33,227
a reporter
named Phil Hockner.
27
00:01:33,327 --> 00:01:34,995
Look at this
cheap shot.
28
00:01:35,163 --> 00:01:36,597
He said the mayor
didn't come through
on his promise
29
00:01:36,697 --> 00:01:38,832
to clean up
the South Bronx
landfill.
30
00:01:38,932 --> 00:01:40,701
Mike...He didn't.
31
00:01:41,469 --> 00:01:43,404
Well, you go...
32
00:01:43,504 --> 00:01:45,473
Try and clean up
a landfill,
33
00:01:45,573 --> 00:01:46,807
and... and you
come back
34
00:01:46,907 --> 00:01:48,642
and you tell me
that isn't a cheap shot.
35
00:01:49,977 --> 00:01:51,179
Mike, old buddy.
36
00:01:52,246 --> 00:01:54,014
You are looking
sharp.
37
00:01:54,182 --> 00:01:55,783
You have got
a thing going on...
38
00:01:57,185 --> 00:01:59,420
And you are down
with the ladies.
39
00:01:59,520 --> 00:02:01,289
How much money
do you want, James?
40
00:02:01,389 --> 00:02:02,656
Just enough for lunch?
41
00:02:02,756 --> 00:02:04,692
Oh, Come on.
This is the fifth
day in a row!
42
00:02:04,792 --> 00:02:06,260
Please tell me
you're not spending
this
43
00:02:06,360 --> 00:02:08,429
on that childish
train set.
44
00:02:08,529 --> 00:02:10,798
Childish!
Mike, I'm not the one
45
00:02:10,898 --> 00:02:14,101
who has that stupid
vibrating football game.
46
00:02:14,202 --> 00:02:17,205
I've seen that
at the store, Mike.
It says ages 8-12.
47
00:02:17,271 --> 00:02:18,839
Okay, first of all...
48
00:02:21,209 --> 00:02:22,543
This isn't about me.
49
00:02:23,944 --> 00:02:26,280
Second of all,
the box says
ages 8 and above.
50
00:02:27,581 --> 00:02:28,816
I'm above.
51
00:02:31,051 --> 00:02:32,820
What do you want
the money for,
James?
52
00:02:32,920 --> 00:02:36,089
I'm learning to play a new
street game called
three-card monte.
53
00:02:36,224 --> 00:02:38,025
Mike, all you
have to do is
find the queen.
54
00:02:38,125 --> 00:02:39,860
Find the queen!
55
00:02:40,728 --> 00:02:42,062
That sounds like
a game that...
56
00:02:42,230 --> 00:02:44,332
Sounds
like a game that
Carter would play.
57
00:02:44,432 --> 00:02:46,133
Isn't Carter
the city champion?
58
00:02:46,234 --> 00:02:48,769
That sounds like
Carter reading
the personal ads.
59
00:02:48,869 --> 00:02:50,738
There.
Can we go eat now?
60
00:02:54,708 --> 00:02:56,610
Don't worry, Mike.
I'm gonna make
all my money back.
61
00:02:56,710 --> 00:02:59,079
The guy in front of me
wins all the time.
62
00:02:59,813 --> 00:03:00,881
No way!
63
00:03:02,783 --> 00:03:05,018
It's not the same
guy every time,
is it?
64
00:03:05,118 --> 00:03:06,820
It is!
65
00:03:06,920 --> 00:03:08,822
I haven't got all day
to try and explain
this to you,
66
00:03:08,922 --> 00:03:12,426
So let me just
say this, I forbid you
to play that game.
67
00:03:12,526 --> 00:03:13,527
Okay?
68
00:03:13,627 --> 00:03:15,263
Listen, uh, Stacey,
69
00:03:15,363 --> 00:03:17,064
I'm gonna have
lunch with the mayor
at his club,
70
00:03:17,164 --> 00:03:21,101
so can you put
these business cards
in your rolodex for me?
71
00:03:25,038 --> 00:03:26,274
Okay I'll tell you
what. I'll uh...
72
00:03:26,307 --> 00:03:27,808
Put the first one in...
73
00:03:28,609 --> 00:03:30,844
And I'll get you
rolling.
74
00:03:30,944 --> 00:03:33,146
Gimme a break, Mike.
I'm reading
a classic here.
75
00:03:33,281 --> 00:03:34,782
Don't you want me
to better myself?
76
00:03:34,882 --> 00:03:37,150
She's in our book club.
A bunch of women
from City Hall
77
00:03:37,285 --> 00:03:38,886
are meeting tomorrow
for a group discussion.
78
00:03:38,986 --> 00:03:40,921
A girls' book club?
Why don't you just buy...
79
00:03:41,021 --> 00:03:42,790
Why don't you just
buy a condo in Florida,
get six cats,
80
00:03:42,890 --> 00:03:44,292
and call it a life?
81
00:03:45,326 --> 00:03:46,727
Will you stop
doing that?
82
00:03:49,930 --> 00:03:52,633
So admit it.
You enjoyed our
little squash game.
83
00:03:52,733 --> 00:03:54,435
Uh, afraid not, sir.
84
00:03:55,202 --> 00:03:56,169
Why not?
85
00:03:56,304 --> 00:03:57,305
You played naked.
86
00:03:58,572 --> 00:03:59,773
Well, that's
one of the perks
of the club.
87
00:03:59,873 --> 00:04:01,942
You aren't encumbered
by gym clothes.
88
00:04:02,042 --> 00:04:04,177
I do feel that
I was at a disadvantage
89
00:04:04,312 --> 00:04:06,947
because, uh...
I couldn't look
at you.
90
00:04:08,949 --> 00:04:10,551
So, sir, I thought
the Cabot House
91
00:04:10,651 --> 00:04:14,488
changed its charter
a few years back
to, uh... admit women.
92
00:04:14,588 --> 00:04:18,191
Well, we did, although
there aren't
many female members...
93
00:04:18,326 --> 00:04:19,427
I'm guessing none.
94
00:04:20,461 --> 00:04:21,495
How did you know?
95
00:04:21,595 --> 00:04:23,831
Well, I had a look
at the club registry.
96
00:04:23,931 --> 00:04:26,434
The president
of the ladies' auxiliary
is, uh...
97
00:04:26,534 --> 00:04:28,336
Frank Costello.
98
00:04:28,402 --> 00:04:30,438
I know you have
moral objections,
Mike,
99
00:04:30,538 --> 00:04:32,039
but you see...
100
00:04:32,139 --> 00:04:36,143
I grew up in a world of
boys' schools, boys' clubs,
101
00:04:36,243 --> 00:04:37,545
boys' dances.
102
00:04:38,612 --> 00:04:40,381
What ever happened
to that world?
103
00:04:41,014 --> 00:04:43,216
It's called
San Francisco.
104
00:04:43,351 --> 00:04:44,485
Psst!
105
00:04:47,388 --> 00:04:48,456
Psst!
106
00:04:50,891 --> 00:04:53,461
I understand
Mike put the kibosh
on the gambling?
107
00:04:54,695 --> 00:04:55,796
What's it to you?
108
00:04:55,896 --> 00:04:57,531
I happen to know
somebody in the office
109
00:04:57,631 --> 00:04:58,732
who can help you win
your money back.
110
00:04:58,832 --> 00:05:00,200
Really? Who?
111
00:05:00,968 --> 00:05:02,370
Pick a card, any card.
112
00:05:04,472 --> 00:05:05,939
Got it.
Don't tell me.
113
00:05:08,442 --> 00:05:11,144
Seven of clubs.
Seven of clubs!
That's amazing!
114
00:05:13,381 --> 00:05:16,083
Oh, my gosh.
You turned the whole
deck into seven of clubs!
115
00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:19,553
James, I happen
to be a master
116
00:05:19,653 --> 00:05:20,821
of the sleight
of hand,
117
00:05:20,921 --> 00:05:24,392
or as we
like to call it...
prestidigitation.
118
00:05:24,425 --> 00:05:26,460
I went to magic camp
three summers in a row.
119
00:05:26,560 --> 00:05:27,695
At the end of
the third year,
120
00:05:27,795 --> 00:05:29,697
I got my certificate
of completion.
121
00:05:30,798 --> 00:05:32,866
Isn't it
a one-year course?
122
00:05:32,966 --> 00:05:35,302
You wanna win
your money back
or what?
123
00:05:35,403 --> 00:05:38,406
The Cabot House
is like a second
home to me, Mike.
124
00:05:38,506 --> 00:05:40,441
I was just
hoping it would
win you over.
125
00:05:40,541 --> 00:05:42,175
No offense.
It's just...
126
00:05:42,275 --> 00:05:43,777
It's not my type
of crowd.
127
00:05:43,877 --> 00:05:44,945
That's Jeff Gibbons
over there.
128
00:05:45,045 --> 00:05:47,415
He's a CEO of
Pierce Brothers publishing.
129
00:05:47,448 --> 00:05:50,851
Bryan Rush manages
the largest mutual
fund in America,
130
00:05:50,951 --> 00:05:53,421
And, of course,
you know
John Dorris!
131
00:05:53,521 --> 00:05:54,688
Well, look who's here.
132
00:05:54,788 --> 00:05:57,057
(CHUCKLING)
Hey, Flaherty!
133
00:05:57,157 --> 00:06:00,160
You know, if you ever
wanna get out of politics
134
00:06:00,260 --> 00:06:03,431
and put your law degree
to real use,
135
00:06:04,164 --> 00:06:05,165
Give us a call.
136
00:06:05,265 --> 00:06:07,601
Thank you, John.
I'm flattered.
137
00:06:07,701 --> 00:06:09,069
He's with me.
138
00:06:14,608 --> 00:06:16,309
So, you see, Mike?
139
00:06:16,444 --> 00:06:17,645
Well, I have to
admit, sir,
140
00:06:17,745 --> 00:06:21,048
there are some very
impressive people
here, but, uh...
141
00:06:21,882 --> 00:06:23,183
I just...
142
00:06:24,117 --> 00:06:25,318
Oh, that's good!
143
00:06:26,454 --> 00:06:27,788
Wait, wait, wait!
Don't take another
bite
144
00:06:27,888 --> 00:06:29,657
Until Jerry loosens you up
with a little
deep-tissue massage.
145
00:06:29,757 --> 00:06:30,724
Jerry!
146
00:06:30,824 --> 00:06:31,825
Really, sir,
don't bother,
147
00:06:31,925 --> 00:06:34,462
because it's not
gonna change my...
148
00:06:34,528 --> 00:06:35,663
Oh, God, that's good.
149
00:06:36,997 --> 00:06:38,832
Oh, Jerry, Jerry,
Jerry, Jerry!
150
00:06:42,736 --> 00:06:43,937
Hey.
Hey, Mike.
151
00:06:44,037 --> 00:06:46,474
Yeah, I know.
seven of clubs.
152
00:06:46,574 --> 00:06:48,542
So, Mike,
did you have a nice
time at your lunch?
153
00:06:48,642 --> 00:06:51,812
Of course not, Stuart.
He will not tolerate
that kind of sexism.
154
00:06:51,912 --> 00:06:53,547
He is an enlightened
man.
155
00:06:56,383 --> 00:06:58,385
Tell me you did not
have a good time
at that lunch.
156
00:06:58,486 --> 00:07:00,554
I did not have
a good time at that lunch.
157
00:07:01,689 --> 00:07:03,657
I had a great
time at that lunch.
158
00:07:03,757 --> 00:07:04,825
Yes!
159
00:07:04,925 --> 00:07:07,127
* Men, men, men, men
160
00:07:07,227 --> 00:07:09,262
How could you
have a good time
at a place like that?
161
00:07:09,362 --> 00:07:11,298
Oh, Nikki,
have you ever had
your butt massaged
162
00:07:11,398 --> 00:07:13,266
between salad
and main course?
163
00:07:14,001 --> 00:07:15,869
Unfortunately, yes.
164
00:07:15,969 --> 00:07:18,939
Mike, that club
is nothing but a bunch
of wealthy guys
165
00:07:19,039 --> 00:07:20,240
who sit around
and make decisions
166
00:07:20,340 --> 00:07:21,575
that affect
other people's lives.
167
00:07:21,675 --> 00:07:23,644
I have to land
on the female side
on this one.
168
00:07:23,744 --> 00:07:25,513
Well, knock me over
with a feather!
169
00:07:26,614 --> 00:07:28,816
Really, Mike,
it just reeks
of discrimination.
170
00:07:28,916 --> 00:07:30,417
I mean, if they don't
accept women,
171
00:07:30,518 --> 00:07:33,521
they're probably not too hot
about gays and blacks, either.
172
00:07:34,221 --> 00:07:36,323
Not my kinda place.
Ha!
173
00:07:37,725 --> 00:07:38,926
To Carter!
174
00:07:39,026 --> 00:07:40,728
Hear, hear.
175
00:07:40,828 --> 00:07:41,929
You guys are the best!
176
00:07:43,263 --> 00:07:45,999
Carter,
you really should
meet my nephew.
177
00:07:46,099 --> 00:07:47,234
He's gay.
178
00:07:47,334 --> 00:07:49,036
To hell with
your nephew.
179
00:07:49,136 --> 00:07:50,103
I'm gay!
180
00:07:50,203 --> 00:07:51,204
Oh, ho!
181
00:07:51,304 --> 00:07:53,574
(ALL LAUGHING)
182
00:07:56,176 --> 00:07:57,611
Oh, my.
183
00:08:00,814 --> 00:08:01,849
Stacey,
what about you?
184
00:08:01,949 --> 00:08:03,316
What did you think about
The Great Gatsby?
185
00:08:03,416 --> 00:08:05,786
Well, I think
it's nice to know
that however rich you get,
186
00:08:05,886 --> 00:08:09,456
you know, there's still
the same problems...
drinking and cheating,
187
00:08:09,557 --> 00:08:12,693
the lost innocence
of a dissolute generation.
188
00:08:13,727 --> 00:08:15,563
I read that off
the book jacket.
189
00:08:16,930 --> 00:08:19,767
Hey, am I late?
190
00:08:19,867 --> 00:08:22,570
I think you're
confusing late
with uninvited.
191
00:08:24,037 --> 00:08:25,973
Oh. Apparently
your little club
doesn't allow men.
192
00:08:26,073 --> 00:08:27,140
How ironic.
193
00:08:27,240 --> 00:08:29,910
Of course we do.
If they read
the book.
194
00:08:30,010 --> 00:08:31,579
I read
The Great Gatsby.
195
00:08:31,645 --> 00:08:33,013
Really?
196
00:08:33,113 --> 00:08:35,649
Yeah. I picked it up
while I researching
nicknames for my...
197
00:08:35,749 --> 00:08:36,984
Stuart!
198
00:08:37,084 --> 00:08:38,786
No. Little Stuart.
199
00:08:40,754 --> 00:08:43,090
Burgers really
were better at
the Cabot House,
200
00:08:43,190 --> 00:08:44,157
weren't they?
201
00:08:44,257 --> 00:08:46,326
(TAPPING)
Plus...
202
00:08:47,427 --> 00:08:48,996
They have that
ketchup boat...
203
00:08:49,730 --> 00:08:50,998
Which is nice.
204
00:08:52,499 --> 00:08:54,401
It's just too bad that we
205
00:08:54,501 --> 00:08:56,670
object to that place on...
206
00:08:56,770 --> 00:08:57,871
so many levels.
207
00:08:57,971 --> 00:09:00,407
Ah. So...Many.
208
00:09:01,642 --> 00:09:02,876
Be nice
to go back.
209
00:09:02,976 --> 00:09:04,712
We could go back,
give 'em a piece
of our minds.
210
00:09:04,812 --> 00:09:06,513
Tell them how
outraged we are.
211
00:09:06,614 --> 00:09:07,781
Maybe grab
a little lunch.
212
00:09:07,881 --> 00:09:10,117
Just a quick bite.
We'll really rub
their noses in it.
213
00:09:11,384 --> 00:09:13,253
Deputy mayor
Michael Flaherty!
214
00:09:13,353 --> 00:09:15,422
Ah. Annoying reporter,
Phil Hockner.
215
00:09:15,522 --> 00:09:17,390
Got a second
to answer a question?
216
00:09:17,490 --> 00:09:18,892
For you, Phil?
217
00:09:19,693 --> 00:09:20,628
No.
218
00:09:20,661 --> 00:09:23,496
I have a picture
of the mayor...
219
00:09:23,631 --> 00:09:26,499
Exiting
an exclusively
male club.
220
00:09:26,634 --> 00:09:29,002
All right, Phil.
I'm gonna level
with you.
221
00:09:29,102 --> 00:09:31,872
This picture
was taken months ago when
the mayor was a member.
222
00:09:31,972 --> 00:09:35,008
But, uh... He found out
they weren't admitting
women.
223
00:09:35,108 --> 00:09:38,278
He quit, and he swore
he'd never set foot
in the place again.
224
00:09:38,378 --> 00:09:40,013
So unless you have
any more questions,
225
00:09:40,113 --> 00:09:41,148
will you please
excuse us?
226
00:09:41,248 --> 00:09:42,482
We were having
a little conversation about
227
00:09:42,650 --> 00:09:44,317
how difficult
it is for women
to get ahead
228
00:09:44,417 --> 00:09:45,886
in this male-dominated
world.
229
00:09:51,524 --> 00:09:53,293
Well, you, uh...
230
00:09:53,393 --> 00:09:54,862
shut him down
very nicely.
231
00:09:54,962 --> 00:09:56,930
It's politics, Carter.
You gotta stay
one step ahead.
232
00:09:57,030 --> 00:09:59,366
Hey, Janelle.
Yeah, where's
the mayor?
233
00:09:59,466 --> 00:10:01,134
Ah. At the club.
234
00:10:01,234 --> 00:10:03,303
Ha ha. Course he is.
235
00:10:03,403 --> 00:10:05,372
Okay. Thank you.
236
00:10:05,472 --> 00:10:06,840
All right.
I'm heading down
to Cabot House.
237
00:10:06,940 --> 00:10:09,009
You go back
and hold down the fort.
238
00:10:09,109 --> 00:10:13,180
Fine. But if I hear
you had a hamburger
239
00:10:13,280 --> 00:10:14,915
or got a massage,
240
00:10:15,015 --> 00:10:17,050
so help me god,
there's gonna be
trouble.
241
00:10:19,787 --> 00:10:21,554
MAN: Round and around
and around she goes,
242
00:10:21,655 --> 00:10:23,190
and where she ends up
243
00:10:23,290 --> 00:10:24,858
nobody knows.
Show it to me.
244
00:10:26,393 --> 00:10:27,761
Aw, man!
245
00:10:27,861 --> 00:10:29,897
I'm so sorry.
You have
a nice day now.
246
00:10:29,997 --> 00:10:31,999
Hey, hey, hey!
247
00:10:32,099 --> 00:10:33,701
My man!
248
00:10:33,801 --> 00:10:36,536
This is my friend
right here.
This is my personal ATM!
249
00:10:37,938 --> 00:10:40,040
Step up, Wisconsin.
What you wanna do?
250
00:10:40,140 --> 00:10:41,408
Ah, ah, ah.
Not so fast, bub.
251
00:10:41,508 --> 00:10:43,110
I'm gonna play
for the kid today.
252
00:10:43,210 --> 00:10:45,345
Oh, big brother.
All right.
253
00:10:45,445 --> 00:10:47,147
So what's the wager?
254
00:10:47,247 --> 00:10:49,182
Whaddaya say
to a finsky, huh?
255
00:10:50,017 --> 00:10:50,984
Okay.
256
00:10:51,084 --> 00:10:51,952
You know the rules.
257
00:10:52,052 --> 00:10:53,086
Do I need to
sell him a pamphlet?
258
00:10:53,186 --> 00:10:54,888
Nice try.
I already bought
a pamphlet.
259
00:10:55,655 --> 00:10:57,124
Come on,
let's get goin',
all right?
260
00:10:57,224 --> 00:10:58,591
Okay. So here we go.
261
00:10:58,692 --> 00:11:00,127
You gotta watch the queen
to get the green.
262
00:11:00,227 --> 00:11:02,429
You don't watch the queen,
you can't get the green.
263
00:11:02,529 --> 00:11:04,297
See, the trick,
James...
264
00:11:05,465 --> 00:11:07,034
Is to keep
your eyes...
265
00:11:07,134 --> 00:11:08,836
On the queen.
266
00:11:08,936 --> 00:11:10,904
You don't get that green.
You gotta show me that queen!
267
00:11:11,004 --> 00:11:14,374
The the lef...
no, no! okay, Stop!
Okay! The right!
268
00:11:14,474 --> 00:11:15,743
Okay, stop!
The middle!
269
00:11:15,843 --> 00:11:17,978
Okay. The middle.
The middle. The middle.
270
00:11:18,078 --> 00:11:18,912
Yes!
271
00:11:19,012 --> 00:11:20,748
All right, Paul!
We won! All right!
272
00:11:20,848 --> 00:11:22,082
Okay. Okay. Okay. Now...
273
00:11:22,182 --> 00:11:25,118
We go for the big bucks.
James, give me your wallet.
274
00:11:30,891 --> 00:11:31,658
Sir?
275
00:11:31,759 --> 00:11:33,493
Over here, Mike.
276
00:11:33,593 --> 00:11:35,462
(PANTS) There you are.
277
00:11:35,562 --> 00:11:36,764
Listen, I need you
to get dressed.
278
00:11:36,797 --> 00:11:38,098
We gotta get
out of here.
279
00:11:38,198 --> 00:11:41,902
Oh, I just sprayed
some eucalyptus oil,
Mike. Smell it.
280
00:11:42,002 --> 00:11:43,603
Sir, I grew up
in New York.
281
00:11:43,771 --> 00:11:44,905
I'm not gonna
fall for that.
282
00:11:45,005 --> 00:11:47,240
Come on, let's go.
I'll explain to you
in the car.
283
00:11:52,813 --> 00:11:54,848
Then again,
why rush?
284
00:11:55,648 --> 00:11:56,984
It's so nice in here.
285
00:12:11,664 --> 00:12:13,801
Still there, isn't he?
(EXHALES)
286
00:12:13,867 --> 00:12:16,069
I'm losing faith
in my plan to
wait him out, sir.
287
00:12:17,637 --> 00:12:18,638
I don't believe
the guy's
288
00:12:18,806 --> 00:12:20,207
just gonna sit
by my locker
289
00:12:20,307 --> 00:12:21,909
and hope
that I show up.
290
00:12:23,811 --> 00:12:25,879
Seems like
a stupid plan,
doesn't it, sir?
291
00:12:28,581 --> 00:12:29,917
PAUL: Here we go.
Round and round
she goes,
292
00:12:30,017 --> 00:12:31,451
And where they stop,
nobody knows.
293
00:12:31,551 --> 00:12:33,286
Find the queen...
it's here! Damn!
294
00:12:34,922 --> 00:12:36,423
You just lost
to yourself.
295
00:12:36,523 --> 00:12:37,825
When are you guys
gonna learn?
296
00:12:37,858 --> 00:12:39,326
You can't win
at these games.
297
00:12:39,426 --> 00:12:42,062
Oh, yeah? Here.
Find the lady.
298
00:12:42,162 --> 00:12:44,297
And round and round
she goes, and...
299
00:12:44,397 --> 00:12:45,432
Find the queen.
300
00:12:47,134 --> 00:12:48,201
Damn!
301
00:12:49,636 --> 00:12:50,838
I thought you said
you can't win.
302
00:12:50,904 --> 00:12:52,539
No, I said
you can't win.
303
00:12:52,639 --> 00:12:53,706
The reason
you can't find
the queen
304
00:12:53,841 --> 00:12:55,108
is because
they palm it.
305
00:12:55,208 --> 00:12:57,878
Palm it? James,
hand me my big book
of magic terms.
306
00:13:00,113 --> 00:13:01,849
Wait. They cheat?
This isn't fair!
307
00:13:01,949 --> 00:13:03,951
Yes, James,
cheating isn't fair.
308
00:13:04,051 --> 00:13:07,554
Kids, thanks for
tuning in to this week's
after school special,
309
00:13:07,654 --> 00:13:09,957
"The Boy who Played
Three-Card Monte."
310
00:13:12,092 --> 00:13:13,861
Yeah, I'm calling
about a fire.
311
00:13:15,428 --> 00:13:17,097
No, no, not to report one.
312
00:13:17,865 --> 00:13:19,132
To request one.
313
00:13:20,868 --> 00:13:22,903
I want you to
send some trucks...
314
00:13:23,003 --> 00:13:24,537
And clear
this building out.
315
00:13:26,573 --> 00:13:28,441
Louise...
316
00:13:28,541 --> 00:13:30,243
Louise,
I'm the deputy mayor.
317
00:13:30,944 --> 00:13:32,880
I will decide
what is illegal.
318
00:13:35,148 --> 00:13:36,884
Louise?
319
00:13:37,617 --> 00:13:38,919
Ah, damn it.
320
00:13:39,552 --> 00:13:41,621
Phone shorted out.
321
00:13:41,721 --> 00:13:44,457
Sir, I told you
this club was not
a good idea.
322
00:13:44,557 --> 00:13:46,426
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
323
00:13:48,261 --> 00:13:50,530
You have to understand
something, Mike.
324
00:13:50,630 --> 00:13:52,900
This place fills
a void for me...
325
00:13:52,933 --> 00:13:55,168
My daughter's
all grown up.
My wife is gone.
326
00:13:55,268 --> 00:13:57,737
Plus I'm the mayor.
It's not easy for me
to meet new people.
327
00:13:57,905 --> 00:13:59,172
Look, sir, I'm sorry
328
00:13:59,272 --> 00:14:01,708
you're not gonna
have a relationship
with this club anymore,
329
00:14:01,808 --> 00:14:04,644
but if you ever want
a friend, you want someone
to hang out with,
330
00:14:04,744 --> 00:14:05,946
You know,
just call me.
331
00:14:06,046 --> 00:14:09,582
Oh, Mike,
you don't want to
hang out with me.
332
00:14:09,682 --> 00:14:11,351
You're single,
you're attractive...
333
00:14:12,452 --> 00:14:13,653
You're the mayor.
334
00:14:14,955 --> 00:14:16,289
You're a babe magnet.
335
00:14:17,790 --> 00:14:19,927
You know,
I was considered, uh...
336
00:14:20,027 --> 00:14:21,929
Quite the wing man
in my school days.
337
00:14:24,264 --> 00:14:26,199
Did a little flying
myself in college.
338
00:14:26,299 --> 00:14:27,067
(SNICKERS)
339
00:14:27,167 --> 00:14:28,969
My most famous
mission...
340
00:14:29,736 --> 00:14:31,271
Thirty seconds
over Gladdis.
341
00:14:32,672 --> 00:14:34,074
Okay, now I see
how they do it.
342
00:14:34,174 --> 00:14:36,676
All right, Carter,
come here.
Bet with me.
343
00:14:36,776 --> 00:14:38,946
I don't want to bet
with you. I just taught you
how to do it.
344
00:14:38,979 --> 00:14:42,415
Come on. $5.00,
and find...
345
00:14:42,515 --> 00:14:44,151
The queen!
346
00:14:45,152 --> 00:14:46,819
Flip those two.
What?
347
00:14:46,954 --> 00:14:48,455
I said
flip those cards.
348
00:14:51,291 --> 00:14:52,792
Two kings!
349
00:14:52,960 --> 00:14:54,995
So... This must
be the queen,
350
00:14:55,095 --> 00:14:56,463
unless you're
cheating, of course.
351
00:14:56,563 --> 00:14:57,965
You're killing me,
Carter!
352
00:14:57,998 --> 00:14:59,532
(TELEPHONE
RINGS)
353
00:15:00,233 --> 00:15:01,768
Hello?
354
00:15:01,868 --> 00:15:03,503
Uh, yeah. Mike.
355
00:15:03,603 --> 00:15:04,604
I'll be right there.
356
00:15:04,704 --> 00:15:06,239
In fact,
I'll take a cab.
357
00:15:08,875 --> 00:15:10,177
I'm telling you,
Gatsby had a chance
358
00:15:10,277 --> 00:15:11,578
at Daisy when they
were young and single,
359
00:15:11,678 --> 00:15:12,712
and he walked away.
360
00:15:12,812 --> 00:15:13,846
He has a point.
361
00:15:13,981 --> 00:15:15,448
The only thing
that I don't get
is if Daisy
362
00:15:15,548 --> 00:15:18,151
loved him so much,
why didn't she just leave
her husband?
363
00:15:18,251 --> 00:15:19,686
Because women
honor their commitments.
364
00:15:19,786 --> 00:15:21,254
They don't feel
comfortable cheating.
365
00:15:21,354 --> 00:15:25,058
Ha. It really is hard
finding a good
cheating woman.
366
00:15:26,759 --> 00:15:27,760
I have a question
for you.
367
00:15:28,996 --> 00:15:30,397
This guy
I've been seeing
368
00:15:30,497 --> 00:15:32,665
last night gave me
a really expensive
necklace for no reason.
369
00:15:33,500 --> 00:15:34,834
What does that mean?
370
00:15:35,002 --> 00:15:36,836
Look, one of us gave up
free tickets to
the Rangers game
371
00:15:37,004 --> 00:15:38,238
to stay home
and read last night,
372
00:15:38,338 --> 00:15:40,040
so either I want to
see a fight break out,
373
00:15:40,140 --> 00:15:41,441
or I want to talk
about this book.
374
00:15:41,541 --> 00:15:45,712
Fine. Stuart,
what does it mean if...
375
00:15:45,812 --> 00:15:48,881
Gatsby were to give
a very expensive
necklace
376
00:15:49,016 --> 00:15:51,551
to Daisy
for no reason?
377
00:15:51,651 --> 00:15:54,754
He's feeling guilty
because he's fooling around.
378
00:15:54,854 --> 00:15:56,056
Really?
379
00:15:58,058 --> 00:15:59,626
I really like
the necklace, though.
380
00:16:05,132 --> 00:16:06,299
CARTER: Voila!
381
00:16:06,399 --> 00:16:07,767
I made it.
382
00:16:07,867 --> 00:16:10,370
What the hell
are you doing in here?
383
00:16:10,470 --> 00:16:13,506
You're supposed to
cause a diversion
so we can get out!
384
00:16:13,606 --> 00:16:15,708
You just told me
to just come right down.
385
00:16:15,808 --> 00:16:17,477
Read... Between...
The lines!
386
00:16:17,577 --> 00:16:19,279
Fine, I'll just go
right back...
387
00:16:19,379 --> 00:16:20,547
No, no, no.
That's too risky.
388
00:16:20,647 --> 00:16:22,615
You gotta stay here now.
He might see you.
389
00:16:23,750 --> 00:16:25,385
Oh, man.
390
00:16:25,485 --> 00:16:27,854
All right, well,
there's no phone,
so...
391
00:16:27,954 --> 00:16:30,057
I guess we just
wait here until...
392
00:16:30,123 --> 00:16:31,958
One of the other members
comes to help us out.
393
00:16:32,059 --> 00:16:33,760
I prefer
to steam alone.
394
00:16:35,062 --> 00:16:36,529
I booked the room
for the whole day.
395
00:16:37,564 --> 00:16:40,267
It's just never
enough for you, is it?
396
00:16:48,708 --> 00:16:50,477
Trying to break
a sweat there, Mike?
397
00:16:51,911 --> 00:16:53,413
I have no phone.
398
00:16:53,513 --> 00:16:56,149
Nobody is coming
to help us!
399
00:16:56,249 --> 00:16:57,950
Your cell phone's
back on.
400
00:16:58,085 --> 00:16:59,386
I'm back in business!
401
00:17:00,720 --> 00:17:02,555
(PHONE RINGING)
402
00:17:02,655 --> 00:17:03,456
Yeah?
403
00:17:03,556 --> 00:17:04,824
Stacey,
listen to me.
404
00:17:04,924 --> 00:17:06,093
Mike, is that you?
405
00:17:06,126 --> 00:17:07,960
I want you to listen
very carefully
406
00:17:08,095 --> 00:17:09,562
and do everything
I say.
407
00:17:09,662 --> 00:17:12,865
First... Cancel
my vacation to Florida.
408
00:17:15,135 --> 00:17:16,503
Second...
409
00:17:16,603 --> 00:17:20,140
I am trapped
in the Cabot House
steam room
410
00:17:20,240 --> 00:17:21,674
with the mayor.
411
00:17:21,774 --> 00:17:24,111
I want you to get
everybody together,
412
00:17:24,144 --> 00:17:27,147
come down here,
and create a diversion
413
00:17:27,247 --> 00:17:28,915
so we can get...
(PHONE BEEPING)
414
00:17:29,015 --> 00:17:30,117
Hello?
415
00:17:30,183 --> 00:17:31,451
Hello?
416
00:17:32,185 --> 00:17:33,453
Day of reckoning.
417
00:17:33,553 --> 00:17:34,587
The point of no return.
418
00:17:34,687 --> 00:17:36,489
It is now or never...
Gimme the money.
419
00:17:42,195 --> 00:17:43,463
All of it, James.
420
00:17:46,666 --> 00:17:47,867
Good-bye, guys.
421
00:17:49,736 --> 00:17:51,904
(GROANING)
422
00:17:54,441 --> 00:17:57,377
Mike, could you spray
some more eucalyptus?
423
00:18:03,150 --> 00:18:04,784
So thirsty...
424
00:18:08,355 --> 00:18:12,959
* So thirsty
425
00:18:15,395 --> 00:18:16,963
(WHISPERS)
So thirsty.
426
00:18:17,897 --> 00:18:20,300
As someone
who's been here
longer than you,
427
00:18:20,400 --> 00:18:21,501
I don't want to
hear it.
428
00:18:21,601 --> 00:18:23,836
I've been here
the longest.
429
00:18:28,541 --> 00:18:30,410
Man, that guy's patient.
430
00:18:31,878 --> 00:18:34,814
Oh, sure.
He's in a climate-
controlled environment.
431
00:18:34,914 --> 00:18:36,015
We're in Hell.
432
00:18:37,550 --> 00:18:39,752
I pity the man
who has to wash
this towel.
433
00:18:41,954 --> 00:18:43,089
This is not good.
434
00:18:44,291 --> 00:18:47,026
Wait a second.
This is the diversion!
435
00:18:47,194 --> 00:18:48,795
We should be leaving!
436
00:18:48,895 --> 00:18:50,597
ALL: Ta-da!
437
00:18:50,697 --> 00:18:52,265
No! No!
438
00:18:52,365 --> 00:18:55,502
Why does everybody
insist on breaking in here?
439
00:18:55,602 --> 00:18:57,804
Create a diversion
and get everyone
down here.
440
00:18:57,904 --> 00:19:00,373
Frankly, I think
I deserve a bonus.
441
00:19:00,473 --> 00:19:02,442
It's been like this
all day.
442
00:19:02,542 --> 00:19:04,544
I'm gonna put
my suit back on...
443
00:19:07,714 --> 00:19:11,218
The rest of you,
if you're not already naked,
444
00:19:11,284 --> 00:19:12,285
Strip down.
445
00:19:12,385 --> 00:19:13,353
Mike!
446
00:19:13,453 --> 00:19:15,555
You heard the man.
Exactly what he says.
447
00:19:17,524 --> 00:19:19,058
Can you help me
with my pants?
448
00:19:19,959 --> 00:19:21,027
Come on, Mr. Man!
449
00:19:21,127 --> 00:19:22,094
Here we go!
450
00:19:22,229 --> 00:19:24,631
Oh, ho! It's Wisconsin
and his big brother.
451
00:19:24,731 --> 00:19:26,098
What? Y'all want
another beating?
452
00:19:26,399 --> 00:19:28,235
$300!
453
00:19:29,636 --> 00:19:31,238
You wanna bet $300?
454
00:19:32,572 --> 00:19:34,040
You heard the man.
455
00:19:34,140 --> 00:19:35,107
All right, y'all.
456
00:19:35,242 --> 00:19:36,676
Come on, let's do this.
457
00:19:36,776 --> 00:19:39,011
$300. Find the queen,
you keep the green.
458
00:19:39,111 --> 00:19:40,480
Show me the queen,
you keep the green.
459
00:19:40,580 --> 00:19:43,250
Show me the queen.
Where the queen?
Where the queen?
460
00:19:43,350 --> 00:19:44,351
Turn over
those two!
461
00:19:44,451 --> 00:19:45,652
Cop!
462
00:19:47,354 --> 00:19:48,888
PAUL: Wait!
463
00:19:48,988 --> 00:19:49,956
Come back!
464
00:19:50,056 --> 00:19:51,958
He took all my money.
465
00:19:52,058 --> 00:19:53,426
But, the point is...
466
00:19:53,526 --> 00:19:54,861
Is that he didn't
beat us.
467
00:19:54,961 --> 00:19:58,030
You see? Because
there is no queen.
Look! King! King!
468
00:19:58,130 --> 00:19:59,266
King!
469
00:20:03,370 --> 00:20:04,737
Can I have
a sip of that?
470
00:20:10,610 --> 00:20:13,045
Deputy Mayor
Mike Flaherty.
471
00:20:16,349 --> 00:20:19,185
One second,
annoying reporter
Phil Hockner.
472
00:20:25,157 --> 00:20:26,326
Here's some towels.
473
00:20:26,426 --> 00:20:27,927
STUART: We don't need 'em!
NIKKI: Shut up, Stuart!
474
00:20:28,995 --> 00:20:31,464
With you here, Mike,
I've got my story.
475
00:20:31,564 --> 00:20:34,233
"Mayor hides ties
to elitist club."
476
00:20:34,334 --> 00:20:35,935
Randall Winston
hides nothing.
477
00:20:37,103 --> 00:20:38,137
He's a man...
478
00:20:38,237 --> 00:20:40,840
Whose actions speak
louder than his words.
479
00:20:40,940 --> 00:20:43,743
He's a man
of great vision.
480
00:20:44,444 --> 00:20:45,845
I can't see.
481
00:20:47,647 --> 00:20:50,049
With all due
respect, sir,
I've gotcha.
482
00:20:50,149 --> 00:20:52,218
With all due respect,
Phil, no, you don't.
483
00:20:52,319 --> 00:20:54,687
Come on in, guys.
Right here.
484
00:20:54,787 --> 00:20:55,855
The mayor has
a statement to make
485
00:20:55,955 --> 00:20:57,223
about the admission
of women here
486
00:20:57,324 --> 00:20:58,325
at Cabot House.
487
00:20:59,459 --> 00:21:00,927
Sir...
488
00:21:06,833 --> 00:21:09,802
The Cabot House has to
catch up to the times.
489
00:21:10,903 --> 00:21:13,606
I'm afraid we have to
go co-ed.
490
00:21:13,706 --> 00:21:16,876
Oh, hell, I'm delighted
we have to go co-ed.
491
00:21:16,976 --> 00:21:19,111
All right.
Let's get some
pictures.
492
00:21:22,715 --> 00:21:24,351
I want some copies
of these.
493
00:21:26,686 --> 00:21:28,621
I'm not much of
a bar type of guy.
494
00:21:28,721 --> 00:21:30,156
I'm really only here
with the book club.
495
00:21:30,256 --> 00:21:32,925
I mean, what are the odds
that I'm gonna find
a woman here
496
00:21:33,025 --> 00:21:36,396
who wants what I want?
A commitment, children,
497
00:21:36,496 --> 00:21:37,864
a cedar closet.
498
00:21:37,964 --> 00:21:42,902
Wow...I never met
someone who I felt
so in touch with.
499
00:21:43,002 --> 00:21:44,571
How do you know
so much about women?
500
00:21:44,671 --> 00:21:46,706
Books. I'm a reader.
501
00:21:47,707 --> 00:21:49,108
I thought we were
having a book club.
502
00:21:49,208 --> 00:21:51,010
We are. Hi.
503
00:21:51,110 --> 00:21:53,245
We just phased out
the book reading part
of the book club.
504
00:21:53,380 --> 00:21:54,447
How are you?
505
00:21:54,547 --> 00:21:57,016
Shh, shh, shh.
SportsCenter's on.
506
00:21:57,116 --> 00:21:58,150
Very nice.
36005
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