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1
00:00:03,612 --> 00:00:06,919
Now for the question that I'm
famous for asking on Fridays...
2
00:00:06,963 --> 00:00:08,747
What's everyone
doing this weekend?
3
00:00:08,791 --> 00:00:11,141
Me and Dick are gonna go
check out this cranberry bog
4
00:00:11,185 --> 00:00:12,925
down in the Chimdale Wetlands.
5
00:00:12,969 --> 00:00:14,579
How about you, Deputy Director?
6
00:00:14,623 --> 00:00:17,756
Oh, I'm going to
a different cranberry bog.
7
00:00:21,456 --> 00:00:22,761
Oh, nice!
8
00:00:22,805 --> 00:00:24,633
All right, men.
Back to work.
9
00:00:24,676 --> 00:00:27,940
We're in the middle
of a giant mission!
10
00:00:27,984 --> 00:00:30,334
Do you have any plans
this weekend, Stan?
11
00:00:30,378 --> 00:00:32,119
Hey, would you mind
asking the other guys?
12
00:00:32,162 --> 00:00:33,511
I feel like if I answer,
13
00:00:33,555 --> 00:00:35,513
I'll get trapped
in a conversation with you.
14
00:00:35,557 --> 00:00:37,167
But you're the only one
with a family,
15
00:00:37,211 --> 00:00:39,300
and families have always
fascinated me
16
00:00:39,343 --> 00:00:41,824
because I don't have one.
17
00:00:41,867 --> 00:00:44,479
That's a stupid reason
to be fascinated by something.
18
00:00:44,522 --> 00:00:47,438
I don't have a vagina
and I never think about those.
19
00:00:47,482 --> 00:00:49,614
Well, now I'm thinking
about them a little bit.
20
00:00:49,658 --> 00:00:52,008
Thanks a lot, Weitzman.
Now I have to go home at lunch.
21
00:00:52,052 --> 00:00:53,488
Hey, wait!
22
00:00:53,531 --> 00:00:55,533
I have a coupon to take
a whole family to a buffet.
23
00:00:55,577 --> 00:00:57,796
Zoinks!
Thanks, Dr. Weitzman!
24
00:00:57,840 --> 00:00:59,059
Maybe I could join you guys.
25
00:00:59,102 --> 00:01:00,712
Oh, I couldn't ask you
to do that.
26
00:01:00,756 --> 00:01:02,279
After all,
you gave us the coupon.
27
00:01:02,323 --> 00:01:03,976
You've done enough.
28
00:01:07,937 --> 00:01:09,373
So how's your day going?
29
00:01:09,417 --> 00:01:11,767
Sorry. I don't like
a lot of chitchat
30
00:01:11,810 --> 00:01:13,247
while I'm getting my nails done.
31
00:01:15,292 --> 00:01:17,816
Buckle, what's good, my man?!
32
00:01:21,168 --> 00:01:23,953
Everyone... Everyone get
in the car!
33
00:01:23,996 --> 00:01:26,129
Stan, you can't just
kick the door
34
00:01:26,173 --> 00:01:28,262
off its hinges
and scream at us.
35
00:01:28,305 --> 00:01:31,265
There's a new buffet in town.
36
00:01:31,308 --> 00:01:35,007
And I got us a coupon
for free everything.
37
00:01:35,051 --> 00:01:38,446
Everyone get in the car!
38
00:02:11,174 --> 00:02:14,395
Hey, Rog, is Dad forcing you
to go to the buffet too?
39
00:02:14,438 --> 00:02:16,223
What... What's that?
I'm sorry.
40
00:02:16,266 --> 00:02:17,678
It's just that I am
thinking about, like,
41
00:02:17,702 --> 00:02:19,617
a billion things right now.
42
00:02:19,661 --> 00:02:21,706
What were you asking me?
43
00:02:21,750 --> 00:02:24,927
I just wanted to know if you
were coming to the buffet.
44
00:02:24,970 --> 00:02:27,364
He thinks
I can go to a buffet!
45
00:02:27,408 --> 00:02:30,672
Now.
In the middle of this chaos!
46
00:02:30,715 --> 00:02:32,935
You don't look stressed, Roger.
47
00:02:32,978 --> 00:02:34,338
You're...
You're just sitting here.
48
00:02:34,371 --> 00:02:36,156
Steven!
Leave him!
49
00:02:36,199 --> 00:02:37,679
Maybe it looks that way.
50
00:02:37,722 --> 00:02:39,898
But up here, full meltdown.
51
00:02:39,942 --> 00:02:42,901
Imagine a thousand Chernobyls
and you're halfway there.
52
00:02:42,945 --> 00:02:44,033
So...
53
00:02:44,076 --> 00:02:45,426
2,000 Chernobyls?
54
00:02:45,469 --> 00:02:46,905
You can't put a number on it,
Steve!
55
00:02:46,949 --> 00:02:49,038
It's one meltdown!
56
00:02:52,084 --> 00:02:53,434
Why are we speeding?
57
00:02:53,477 --> 00:02:55,566
We just spent 45 minutes
decorating the car.
58
00:02:55,610 --> 00:02:57,873
What do I love most
about buffets?
59
00:02:57,916 --> 00:02:59,788
In a word... camaraderie.
60
00:02:59,831 --> 00:03:01,790
I thought we'd get together
and do something fun,
61
00:03:01,833 --> 00:03:04,140
go eat cafeteria style,
like at camp.
62
00:03:04,184 --> 00:03:05,707
Camp isn't fun.
63
00:03:05,750 --> 00:03:08,536
They force you to sing
and ride horses all day.
64
00:03:08,579 --> 00:03:10,668
You chose musical horse camp.
65
00:03:10,712 --> 00:03:13,454
Oh, I thought the horses
were gonna make the music.
66
00:03:13,497 --> 00:03:16,805
Well, forcing us to eat
together isn't camaraderie.
67
00:03:16,848 --> 00:03:19,503
Steve, I'm hearing
that you feel "forced."
68
00:03:19,547 --> 00:03:21,026
Could you expand on that?
69
00:03:21,070 --> 00:03:23,855
I guess these handcuffs give me
that "forced" feeling.
70
00:03:23,899 --> 00:03:25,030
The feelings you're feeling
71
00:03:25,074 --> 00:03:27,468
are very natural
family time feelings.
72
00:03:27,511 --> 00:03:30,645
Would anyone like to know
how I feel about buffets?
73
00:03:35,867 --> 00:03:39,088
This long silence has got
to be tough for you.
74
00:03:41,612 --> 00:03:43,397
Make way!
Coupon holder!
75
00:03:43,440 --> 00:03:46,226
Man with a coupon
coming through!
76
00:03:46,269 --> 00:03:48,706
Welcome to
the King's Choice Buffet.
77
00:03:50,099 --> 00:03:51,579
When you're royalty,
you're here.
78
00:03:51,622 --> 00:03:53,537
The VIP section is located
in the back.
79
00:03:53,581 --> 00:03:54,625
Here's your wristbands.
80
00:03:57,149 --> 00:04:01,023
It's a little weird that this
buffet has a VIP section, right?
81
00:04:01,066 --> 00:04:02,459
You wanna hear something weird?
82
00:04:02,503 --> 00:04:04,722
The Goodyear Blimp
is the official bird
83
00:04:04,766 --> 00:04:06,681
of Redondo Beach, California.
84
00:04:06,724 --> 00:04:09,945
Oh, you guys wanna hear
something really weird?
85
00:04:09,988 --> 00:04:12,730
Zerp Znap Za-noodle!
86
00:04:12,774 --> 00:04:14,123
Sit yo ass down.
87
00:04:14,166 --> 00:04:16,691
You need to hear
my patented rules of the buffet.
88
00:04:20,825 --> 00:04:23,959
Rule one... There are no rules.
89
00:04:24,002 --> 00:04:25,569
Wowwww.
90
00:04:25,613 --> 00:04:28,268
Rule two...
Never fill up on bread.
91
00:04:28,311 --> 00:04:30,618
Rule three...
Plates are for losers.
92
00:04:30,661 --> 00:04:32,204
Cut out the middleman
and pile your food
93
00:04:32,228 --> 00:04:33,664
directly onto your tray.
94
00:04:33,708 --> 00:04:35,057
Rules 4 through 100
95
00:04:35,100 --> 00:04:37,320
only apply to buffets
at strip clubs.
96
00:04:37,364 --> 00:04:40,323
And most important, rule 101...
97
00:04:40,367 --> 00:04:43,892
You can never have
a bad time at the buffet.
98
00:04:43,935 --> 00:04:47,417
Cold melon and scallop soup?
99
00:04:47,461 --> 00:04:51,334
Uhhh, I'll take nasty-ass soups
for $200, Alex.
100
00:04:54,381 --> 00:04:55,817
Survey says...
101
00:04:55,860 --> 00:04:57,340
I have to smell it!
102
00:05:01,388 --> 00:05:03,738
I'd like to solve
the puzzle, Pat.
103
00:05:03,781 --> 00:05:07,350
This. Is. A. Disaster.
104
00:05:13,443 --> 00:05:15,184
I thought a walk would clear
my head
105
00:05:15,227 --> 00:05:17,795
but I'm just getting
more stressed out!
106
00:05:17,839 --> 00:05:19,754
Look at those flowers.
107
00:05:19,797 --> 00:05:21,495
Not a care in the world.
108
00:05:21,538 --> 00:05:24,149
Sitting around eating bees
all day.
109
00:05:24,193 --> 00:05:25,412
Do I dare?
110
00:05:25,455 --> 00:05:26,848
No, no, you're being silly,
Roger,
111
00:05:26,891 --> 00:05:29,198
with all the irons
you have in the fire.
112
00:05:29,241 --> 00:05:30,504
But on the other hand...
113
00:05:30,547 --> 00:05:34,029
Ahhh, meltdown averted.
114
00:05:39,730 --> 00:05:42,385
Yuck, I don't like the taste,
but I'm a flower,
115
00:05:42,429 --> 00:05:44,692
so I gotta get used
to eating bees.
116
00:05:47,259 --> 00:05:50,306
Can we leave now?
The place is closing.
117
00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:53,614
Not until we get the special
VIP dessert we were promised.
118
00:05:53,657 --> 00:05:54,789
What the...
119
00:05:54,832 --> 00:05:57,139
Welcome, Smith family.
120
00:05:57,182 --> 00:06:00,272
I'm so glad you joined us
for dinner,
121
00:06:00,316 --> 00:06:02,710
but your time here is just...
122
00:06:04,276 --> 00:06:06,061
Okay, who left this cart out?
123
00:06:06,104 --> 00:06:08,411
Oh, I just bashed my shin!
124
00:06:08,455 --> 00:06:10,065
Oh, turn on the lights!
125
00:06:11,109 --> 00:06:12,415
Not those lights!
126
00:06:12,459 --> 00:06:14,548
Why would I want
the disco lights?!
127
00:06:15,940 --> 00:06:17,768
Dr. Weitzman?!
128
00:06:17,812 --> 00:06:20,075
That's right!
Oh, sorry.
129
00:06:20,118 --> 00:06:21,598
My evil genius voice
130
00:06:21,642 --> 00:06:23,121
sounded cool, though, right?
131
00:06:23,165 --> 00:06:24,949
Sorry about my real voice.
132
00:06:24,993 --> 00:06:26,864
I'm making you my family!
133
00:06:29,606 --> 00:06:30,912
What is happening?!
134
00:06:30,955 --> 00:06:33,436
Geez, Hayley, are you dense?
135
00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:35,917
Dr. Weitzman is a lonely person.
136
00:06:35,960 --> 00:06:37,571
He wants a family.
137
00:06:37,614 --> 00:06:40,835
He's gonna force us to live
with him forever in accordance
138
00:06:40,878 --> 00:06:44,316
to whatever his demented idea
of a "family" is.
139
00:06:44,360 --> 00:06:46,754
I'm assuming
these VIP wristbands
140
00:06:46,797 --> 00:06:48,277
are rigged with explosives
141
00:06:48,320 --> 00:06:50,671
and we've been drugged
with a neurotoxin
142
00:06:50,714 --> 00:06:54,588
to temporarily paralyze... us.
143
00:06:54,631 --> 00:06:57,765
I don't know if I'd call
my ideas "demented."
144
00:06:57,808 --> 00:07:01,769
Plus I wanted to be the one
to say all my demented shit.
145
00:07:08,558 --> 00:07:11,387
Home sweet home.
146
00:07:12,780 --> 00:07:15,478
- Stan, are you okay?
- Okay?
147
00:07:15,522 --> 00:07:17,567
- I'm having a blast!
- You are?
148
00:07:17,611 --> 00:07:19,047
Of course!
149
00:07:19,090 --> 00:07:21,789
Rule 101... You can't have
a bad time at the buffet.
150
00:07:21,832 --> 00:07:25,488
Huh. That's an interesting way
of looking at things, honey.
151
00:07:25,532 --> 00:07:27,359
Excuse me, ma'am.
152
00:07:27,403 --> 00:07:28,883
My sheets are a little tight.
153
00:07:28,926 --> 00:07:30,798
Oh, no, are they a little tight?
154
00:07:30,841 --> 00:07:33,104
They're supposed to be
very tight.
155
00:07:33,148 --> 00:07:35,803
What about all the other people
at the restaurant?
156
00:07:35,846 --> 00:07:37,413
- Were they...
- Background actors.
157
00:07:37,457 --> 00:07:39,023
They actually were all extras
158
00:07:39,067 --> 00:07:40,721
from the
Marvelous Mrs. Maisel set.
159
00:07:40,764 --> 00:07:42,897
Great show.
Getting worse every year.
160
00:07:42,940 --> 00:07:44,768
Can you help us get out of here?
161
00:07:44,812 --> 00:07:47,510
- No.
- What kind of person are you?
162
00:07:47,554 --> 00:07:49,643
I'm not a person.
I'm a robot.
163
00:07:49,686 --> 00:07:52,297
Dr. Weitzman made me.
164
00:07:52,341 --> 00:07:53,579
And then he named me
after a stripper
165
00:07:53,603 --> 00:07:54,952
he once fell in love with.
166
00:07:54,996 --> 00:07:57,825
Okay, put your face back on,
Chardonnay.
167
00:07:57,868 --> 00:07:59,348
No one likes when you do that.
168
00:07:59,391 --> 00:08:01,176
Oh, God, are you two...
169
00:08:01,219 --> 00:08:02,394
I wish!
170
00:08:02,438 --> 00:08:04,440
No, my hostess robot
became sentient,
171
00:08:04,484 --> 00:08:08,009
and as per usual
I'm stuck in the "friend zone."
172
00:08:08,052 --> 00:08:11,839
Okay, it's nigh-nighs,
my sweet family.
173
00:08:37,299 --> 00:08:40,563
Ahhh,
this is the life. No stress.
174
00:08:40,607 --> 00:08:44,219
Just eating bees, not thinking
a million miles an hour.
175
00:08:47,091 --> 00:08:49,441
I wonder why bees aren't
more afraid of flowers.
176
00:08:52,314 --> 00:08:53,750
Oh, no.
177
00:08:53,794 --> 00:08:55,012
Let's go!
178
00:08:55,056 --> 00:08:58,538
Steal as many flowers
as you can for the shop!
179
00:08:58,581 --> 00:09:00,540
I don't like this one bit.
180
00:09:02,933 --> 00:09:04,369
What's that thing?
181
00:09:04,413 --> 00:09:06,937
I thought it was a flower,
but I'm not so sure now.
182
00:09:06,981 --> 00:09:09,549
Check out its nasty root bulb.
183
00:09:09,592 --> 00:09:12,769
It looks like a gross, gray ass.
184
00:09:12,813 --> 00:09:14,466
Eh, let's put it in the van.
185
00:09:14,510 --> 00:09:15,729
Maybe some freak will like it.
186
00:09:17,339 --> 00:09:22,213
And now to the cemetery
for more free flowers!
187
00:09:22,257 --> 00:09:24,302
This is so stressful.
188
00:09:28,132 --> 00:09:30,439
Dr. Weitzman must've woken me up
189
00:09:30,482 --> 00:09:34,051
seven times last night
walking to the bathroom to pee.
190
00:09:34,095 --> 00:09:37,707
If you ask me, he should spend
less time imprisoning families
191
00:09:37,751 --> 00:09:39,927
and more time
imprisoning urologists.
192
00:09:39,970 --> 00:09:42,494
But counterpoint...
What a great night!
193
00:09:42,538 --> 00:09:43,887
I mean, when was the last time
194
00:09:43,931 --> 00:09:45,802
we all slept together
in the same room?
195
00:09:45,846 --> 00:09:47,848
Obviously I'm not counting
our annual trip
196
00:09:47,891 --> 00:09:49,719
to the Gathering
Of The Juggalos.
197
00:09:49,763 --> 00:09:51,591
Good morning,
my beautiful children.
198
00:09:51,634 --> 00:09:53,505
Can you please let us go?!
199
00:09:53,549 --> 00:09:55,986
There must be
some humanity inside you!
200
00:09:56,030 --> 00:09:58,467
Sounds like you guys are hangry.
201
00:09:58,510 --> 00:09:59,990
Who wants Monte Cristos?
202
00:10:00,034 --> 00:10:02,340
The American riff
on a croque monsieur?!
203
00:10:02,384 --> 00:10:03,777
Sign me up!
204
00:10:03,820 --> 00:10:06,127
Now, two simple rules here
in the Weitzman home...
205
00:10:06,170 --> 00:10:08,172
I'm in control of everything,
206
00:10:08,216 --> 00:10:12,699
and that door over there
is off limits.
207
00:10:12,742 --> 00:10:15,049
I think
that door might be significant.
208
00:10:15,092 --> 00:10:16,528
Yeah, no shit.
209
00:10:16,572 --> 00:10:17,660
Dr. Weitzman...
210
00:10:17,704 --> 00:10:19,183
- Call me Dad.
- No.
211
00:10:19,227 --> 00:10:20,750
- Uncle?
- That's worse.
212
00:10:20,794 --> 00:10:23,666
Dr. Weitzman,
why are you doing this?
213
00:10:23,710 --> 00:10:25,494
Great question, Franny.
214
00:10:25,537 --> 00:10:28,540
Chardonnay, roll tape
and do it like...
215
00:10:28,584 --> 00:10:29,890
Christoph Waltz.
216
00:10:29,933 --> 00:10:32,849
Christoph Waltz mode initiated.
217
00:10:36,461 --> 00:10:40,814
No one knows when
or where Dr. Weitzman was born.
218
00:10:40,857 --> 00:10:44,426
He was abandoned as a baby
in the Lanceton sewers,
219
00:10:44,469 --> 00:10:48,996
where even the rats refused
to be his family.
220
00:10:49,039 --> 00:10:51,651
Dr. Weitzman's adolescence
221
00:10:51,694 --> 00:10:55,132
was spent
in and out of orphanages.
222
00:10:55,176 --> 00:10:59,223
He briefly appeared on
The Mickey Mouse Club
223
00:10:59,267 --> 00:11:01,051
until he caught the attention
224
00:11:01,095 --> 00:11:03,488
of the show's
legendary producer
225
00:11:03,532 --> 00:11:05,577
and was quickly removed.
226
00:11:05,621 --> 00:11:09,016
Then back to his sewers
for doctor school.
227
00:11:09,059 --> 00:11:13,890
But even after becoming
a successful C.I.A. doctor,
228
00:11:13,934 --> 00:11:16,501
he could never find
the right woman.
229
00:11:16,545 --> 00:11:19,722
So he was never able to start
the family
230
00:11:19,766 --> 00:11:21,724
he dreamt of his whole life.
231
00:11:21,768 --> 00:11:23,987
And adoption was out
of the question
232
00:11:24,031 --> 00:11:27,034
because obviously
his appearance
233
00:11:27,077 --> 00:11:28,905
terrifies children...
234
00:11:28,949 --> 00:11:31,168
Chardonnay, did I sign off
on this artwork?
235
00:11:33,736 --> 00:11:35,564
We're screwed.
236
00:11:35,607 --> 00:11:37,348
You know how stubborn Dad is.
237
00:11:37,392 --> 00:11:40,003
He'll never admit you can have
a bad time at the buffet.
238
00:11:40,047 --> 00:11:41,309
You're right.
239
00:11:41,352 --> 00:11:43,703
If we're getting out of here,
it's up to us.
240
00:11:45,922 --> 00:11:48,098
I did it.
241
00:11:48,142 --> 00:11:51,058
I ate all that disgusting soup.
242
00:11:51,101 --> 00:11:52,537
And now to...
243
00:11:53,321 --> 00:11:55,018
Well, shit.
244
00:11:57,586 --> 00:11:59,980
Come on, that door
has to be the exit!
245
00:12:04,375 --> 00:12:06,726
Oh, you goofy kids!
246
00:12:06,769 --> 00:12:08,292
Always playing pranks.
247
00:12:08,336 --> 00:12:10,338
I think you all
will love it here.
248
00:12:10,381 --> 00:12:12,383
The days are gonna fly by.
249
00:12:12,427 --> 00:12:15,125
If you don't believe me,
check out this montage.
250
00:12:49,420 --> 00:12:51,335
Who Framed Roger Rabbit!
251
00:12:56,863 --> 00:12:58,995
Okay, gang,
just checked the time
252
00:12:59,039 --> 00:13:00,910
and it's "rock" o'clock.
253
00:13:00,954 --> 00:13:03,130
Be right back with the acoustic.
254
00:13:03,173 --> 00:13:04,696
I can't do it.
255
00:13:04,740 --> 00:13:06,394
I can't listen to him play
256
00:13:06,437 --> 00:13:08,875
another Death Cab for Cutie
song.
257
00:13:08,918 --> 00:13:11,268
I guess some of them
are technically Postal Service.
258
00:13:11,312 --> 00:13:13,401
I've been trying to smile
through all this,
259
00:13:13,444 --> 00:13:14,663
'cause rules are rules.
260
00:13:14,706 --> 00:13:16,360
But some rules
are meant to be...
261
00:13:16,404 --> 00:13:17,361
Broken?
262
00:13:17,405 --> 00:13:19,059
To a crisp.
263
00:13:19,102 --> 00:13:20,843
I have a plan.
264
00:13:20,887 --> 00:13:24,586
Everybody sneak a Monte Cristo
sandwich into bed tonight.
265
00:13:24,629 --> 00:13:26,414
This plan sounds delicious, Dad.
266
00:13:26,457 --> 00:13:28,416
Don't be cute, Steve.
267
00:13:29,983 --> 00:13:31,680
Dad!
268
00:13:31,723 --> 00:13:33,464
We all brought sandwiches
to bed.
269
00:13:33,508 --> 00:13:34,509
What's the plan?
270
00:13:34,552 --> 00:13:36,293
Five minutes, son.
271
00:13:36,337 --> 00:13:37,468
Stan!
272
00:13:37,512 --> 00:13:39,775
Chumbawumba!
Okay.
273
00:13:39,819 --> 00:13:41,385
Everything we need
for our escape
274
00:13:41,429 --> 00:13:43,910
is right here
in the Monte Cristo sandwich.
275
00:13:43,953 --> 00:13:46,434
I'll remove it from the baggie
and just lightly touch
276
00:13:46,477 --> 00:13:48,828
the grease-soaked bread
to the sheets.
277
00:13:50,655 --> 00:13:52,788
Wow. And gross.
278
00:13:56,313 --> 00:13:58,446
Next we use the jam.
279
00:14:02,667 --> 00:14:04,887
Wow, that's strong jam.
280
00:14:04,931 --> 00:14:07,716
I think I just figured out
why I almost died of diarrhea.
281
00:14:09,152 --> 00:14:11,894
Wait.
It's powdered sugar time.
282
00:14:16,246 --> 00:14:18,814
We're not going this way,
but it looks cool, right?
283
00:14:20,816 --> 00:14:22,774
Wait, we should grab Klaus!
284
00:14:22,818 --> 00:14:24,341
There's no time!
285
00:14:24,385 --> 00:14:27,910
Next, everyone take the ham
out of your sandwich and eat it.
286
00:14:27,954 --> 00:14:29,912
It's the perfect
protein-rich snack
287
00:14:29,956 --> 00:14:32,219
to keep our motors humming.
288
00:14:32,262 --> 00:14:33,785
Is anyone there?!
289
00:14:33,829 --> 00:14:36,571
It sounds like
four people eating ham!
290
00:14:36,614 --> 00:14:38,225
Good ham.
291
00:14:41,968 --> 00:14:44,796
Oh, man, the forbidden door
is locked!
292
00:14:44,840 --> 00:14:48,975
Luckily, the "Giving Sandwich"
has one last thing to give.
293
00:14:49,018 --> 00:14:50,150
The bread.
294
00:14:55,111 --> 00:14:57,505
This isn't an exit.
295
00:14:57,548 --> 00:14:59,202
It's a graveyard.
296
00:14:59,246 --> 00:15:01,291
Look at the way they're grouped.
297
00:15:01,335 --> 00:15:05,165
I think they're...
other families.
298
00:15:06,601 --> 00:15:08,603
Yes, there are a lot
of dead bodies,
299
00:15:08,646 --> 00:15:10,170
but at least it's not
a gift shop.
300
00:15:10,213 --> 00:15:12,085
I hate crass commercialism.
301
00:15:12,128 --> 00:15:14,087
But the skeletons are for sale.
302
00:15:14,130 --> 00:15:15,349
I make keychains!
303
00:15:15,392 --> 00:15:17,438
Perfect for a gas station bathroom!
304
00:15:17,481 --> 00:15:19,440
Do you have
any gas station owner friends
305
00:15:19,483 --> 00:15:21,529
who have a birthday coming up?
306
00:15:24,445 --> 00:15:28,188
You killed all those families?
307
00:15:28,231 --> 00:15:31,234
What?
No, they killed themselves.
308
00:15:31,278 --> 00:15:32,975
On average,
most offed themselves
309
00:15:33,019 --> 00:15:35,282
after living with Dr. Weitzman
for three days.
310
00:15:35,325 --> 00:15:37,197
Though the current record
is the Shelmerdines,
311
00:15:37,240 --> 00:15:39,242
who only lasted 45 minutes.
312
00:15:39,286 --> 00:15:40,809
That hurt my feelings.
313
00:15:40,852 --> 00:15:44,073
But you guys really hurt
my feelings trying to escape.
314
00:15:44,117 --> 00:15:45,945
I thought you loved me.
315
00:15:45,988 --> 00:15:47,816
Wait, the other families
killed themselves
316
00:15:47,859 --> 00:15:49,252
without trying to escape?
317
00:15:49,296 --> 00:15:52,168
Well, it was before
my online guitar lessons.
318
00:15:52,212 --> 00:15:54,910
Before I got really good.
319
00:15:54,954 --> 00:15:56,085
You suck at guitar.
320
00:15:56,129 --> 00:15:57,826
Yeah, man, you suck at guitar.
321
00:16:00,002 --> 00:16:02,570
Keep it up, guys.
I think this is working.
322
00:16:02,613 --> 00:16:03,919
Keep mocking him.
323
00:16:03,963 --> 00:16:05,790
You have long,
beautiful eyelashes.
324
00:16:05,834 --> 00:16:07,096
No, honey!
325
00:16:07,140 --> 00:16:10,143
Aaand you always cuff
your sleeves like Cam
326
00:16:10,186 --> 00:16:12,319
from Modern Family.
327
00:16:12,362 --> 00:16:14,582
That's not good?
328
00:16:14,625 --> 00:16:16,323
Wizard alert!
329
00:16:17,977 --> 00:16:21,806
Get out!
330
00:16:21,850 --> 00:16:24,070
How'd you know he'd let us go?
331
00:16:24,113 --> 00:16:26,072
Actually I was sure
he was gonna kill us,
332
00:16:26,115 --> 00:16:28,683
so I just wanted
to get it over with.
333
00:16:31,207 --> 00:16:33,514
I can't believe it.
We're home!
334
00:16:33,557 --> 00:16:35,516
There you all are!
335
00:16:35,559 --> 00:16:36,952
You're good hiders!
336
00:16:36,996 --> 00:16:38,780
I've been looking for months.
337
00:16:38,823 --> 00:16:40,869
Jeff, did you think
we were playing
338
00:16:40,912 --> 00:16:42,175
hide and seek this whole time?
339
00:16:42,218 --> 00:16:45,308
In September I doubted it
for a second.
340
00:16:45,352 --> 00:16:48,007
But then I found this clue.
341
00:16:48,050 --> 00:16:50,183
So I took apart
the water heater,
342
00:16:50,226 --> 00:16:51,662
but you guys weren't in there.
343
00:16:51,706 --> 00:16:53,838
There certainly
was a smell, though.
344
00:16:53,882 --> 00:16:56,276
And a lot of scalding water.
345
00:16:56,319 --> 00:16:58,800
And you guys stayed true
to the game.
346
00:16:58,843 --> 00:17:02,456
When I screamed in agony
for help, you stayed hidden.
347
00:17:02,499 --> 00:17:05,589
And you didn't visit me
in the burn ward.
348
00:17:05,633 --> 00:17:08,375
I can't tell you
how much I respect that.
349
00:17:08,418 --> 00:17:12,422
And now the game is over
and I don't know why.
350
00:17:12,466 --> 00:17:14,946
I guess I can return to my life.
351
00:17:14,990 --> 00:17:17,210
Right back in.
352
00:17:18,254 --> 00:17:19,908
Hi.
353
00:17:24,260 --> 00:17:26,436
- Flower delivery!
- Whoo!
354
00:17:26,480 --> 00:17:28,917
Smells like dead bees
and cigarettes.
355
00:17:28,960 --> 00:17:30,919
It's been in the shop
for two months.
356
00:17:30,962 --> 00:17:34,096
Your sweetheart got
an unbelievable price on it.
357
00:17:34,140 --> 00:17:36,838
Adam, you got me flowers?!
358
00:17:36,881 --> 00:17:39,623
I am Adam and I am guilty.
359
00:17:39,667 --> 00:17:41,669
Whoaaaa, that guy's hot.
360
00:17:41,712 --> 00:17:44,411
The dang door's blockin'
the hot body!
361
00:17:44,454 --> 00:17:45,977
I love it!
362
00:17:47,457 --> 00:17:49,459
So I'm a symbol of love.
363
00:17:49,503 --> 00:17:50,808
That's nice.
364
00:17:50,852 --> 00:17:52,419
I can't believe you remembered
365
00:17:52,462 --> 00:17:54,812
that I love grotesque flowers.
366
00:18:02,037 --> 00:18:03,995
Stan, I'm happy to be home,
367
00:18:04,039 --> 00:18:07,825
but does
something feel... off to you?
368
00:18:07,869 --> 00:18:09,436
There's no buffet and I hate it.
369
00:18:09,479 --> 00:18:11,002
I'm feelin' it too, Dad.
370
00:18:11,046 --> 00:18:12,787
There was just so much food.
371
00:18:12,830 --> 00:18:14,789
I think that's what I loved
about it.
372
00:18:14,832 --> 00:18:17,661
Sounds crazy,
but maybe we're all...
373
00:18:17,705 --> 00:18:19,576
Concerned about Jeff?
Me too.
374
00:18:19,620 --> 00:18:21,622
I think there's something
really wrong there.
375
00:18:21,665 --> 00:18:23,928
He's not, like, fun stupid,
ya know.
376
00:18:23,972 --> 00:18:26,148
I worry Hayley might be
committing a crime
377
00:18:26,192 --> 00:18:27,367
being married to him.
378
00:18:27,410 --> 00:18:29,064
Maybe we meet with the lawyer,
379
00:18:29,108 --> 00:18:30,761
get on record
what we knew when...
380
00:18:30,805 --> 00:18:32,043
We're talking about the buffet.
381
00:18:32,067 --> 00:18:33,590
Oh, my God, the buffet!
382
00:18:33,634 --> 00:18:35,157
I miss the buffet!
383
00:18:35,201 --> 00:18:37,333
- We all do!
- We gotta go back!
384
00:18:37,377 --> 00:18:39,379
Maybe we just have
Stockholm Syndrome?
385
00:18:39,422 --> 00:18:43,557
If that means overwhelming
desire to break into a buffet,
386
00:18:43,600 --> 00:18:46,168
then I got the stock, homes.
387
00:18:55,221 --> 00:18:57,701
And now for dessert.
388
00:19:03,533 --> 00:19:05,622
They're so in love.
389
00:19:05,666 --> 00:19:07,842
And I'm so relaxed.
390
00:19:07,885 --> 00:19:09,191
Get off me!
391
00:19:09,235 --> 00:19:10,323
He's home early!
392
00:19:10,366 --> 00:19:11,846
Now, who the hell is this?
393
00:19:11,889 --> 00:19:13,021
Jennifer,
what's going on?
394
00:19:13,064 --> 00:19:14,327
What is that hideous flower?
395
00:19:14,370 --> 00:19:16,546
Your wife happens
to love hideous flowers!
396
00:19:16,590 --> 00:19:20,159
My best friend
and business partner!
397
00:19:20,202 --> 00:19:22,161
Oh, my jangled nerves!
398
00:19:23,553 --> 00:19:25,468
Oh, good, they're
all gun owners.
399
00:19:25,512 --> 00:19:27,078
This should
de-escalate quickly.
400
00:19:29,864 --> 00:19:31,866
That's a tip for everyone
at home...
401
00:19:31,909 --> 00:19:34,912
No one ever shoots the flower.
402
00:19:37,915 --> 00:19:40,657
Dr. Weitzman is
never gonna let us back in.
403
00:19:40,701 --> 00:19:41,876
Remember how we used
404
00:19:41,919 --> 00:19:44,183
the Monte Cristo sandwich
to get out?
405
00:19:44,226 --> 00:19:46,228
Here's a sandwich
to help us get in...
406
00:19:46,272 --> 00:19:48,448
a C-4 Sandwich.
407
00:19:49,797 --> 00:19:51,755
There are also some
tuna sandwiches in the bag
408
00:19:51,799 --> 00:19:53,627
in case anyone wants to scarf.
409
00:19:55,063 --> 00:19:57,935
Wait, this is
the C-4 sandwich.
410
00:20:01,287 --> 00:20:04,333
Wait a second.
That means the tuna...
411
00:20:04,377 --> 00:20:06,727
Stan, did you buy
the cheap tuna again?
412
00:20:06,770 --> 00:20:09,120
No! It was me!
413
00:20:09,164 --> 00:20:10,774
You bought the cheap tuna?
414
00:20:10,818 --> 00:20:14,082
No, I blew up the wall
from the inside.
415
00:20:14,125 --> 00:20:16,519
What a twist!
Why?
416
00:20:16,563 --> 00:20:19,087
Because my family
came back to me.
417
00:20:19,130 --> 00:20:20,567
I'm just so excited!
418
00:20:20,610 --> 00:20:22,133
This guy's not cool.
419
00:20:22,177 --> 00:20:24,266
I'm starting to think
this was a mistake.
420
00:20:24,310 --> 00:20:26,747
No, no, no, no,
let me get my guitar!
421
00:20:26,790 --> 00:20:28,444
And some Legos!
422
00:20:31,621 --> 00:20:34,058
You guys came to rescue me!
423
00:20:34,102 --> 00:20:35,886
Yes.
Yes, we did.
424
00:20:35,930 --> 00:20:38,280
Let's not be here
when Dr. Weitzman comes back.
425
00:20:38,324 --> 00:20:39,977
But the buffet!
426
00:20:40,021 --> 00:20:42,110
I still want a dried-out
piece of Dover sole
427
00:20:42,153 --> 00:20:44,243
and a sweaty sweet potato pie.
428
00:20:44,286 --> 00:20:47,420
I guess we could try
the buffet across the street.
429
00:20:47,463 --> 00:20:50,118
"Smiths eat free"?
430
00:20:50,161 --> 00:20:51,554
I like that price.
431
00:20:52,163 --> 00:20:53,252
Come on in!
432
00:20:53,295 --> 00:20:54,601
Leave whenever you like!
433
00:20:54,644 --> 00:20:56,646
I'm not lonely!
434
00:20:56,690 --> 00:20:58,648
Bye-bye!
See you soon!
31096
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