All language subtitles for The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet S03E26 The Testimonial 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DDP2 0 H 264-CRFW (1)_track4_[eng]

- Hi, there.

I'm Ricky Nelson.

It's my turn to make an
opening announcement.

That's why I combed my hair.

I really did!

And put on this coat and tie.

I even gargled with
Listerine Antiseptic.

Let's see, where's
the announcement?

"Always keep plenty of
Listerine Antiseptic on hand.

It's great stuff."

Thank you.

[music playing]

- Listerine, the most widely
used antiseptic in the world,

and Antizyme, the first
all-day Antizyme toothpaste,

present "The Adventures
of Ozzie and Harriet,"

starring the entire
Nelson family--

Ozzie, Harriet,
David, and Ricky,

with Don DeFore as Thorny.

[doorbell]

- I'll get it, Pop.

Hello, Dr. Williams.
Come on in.

- Hi, Dave, is your dad home?
- Yes, sir, he's right there.

- Oh, hi-ya, Doc.
- Oh, hi, Oz.

Hello, how are you?

- Sit down, make
yourself comfortable.

- Thanks.

- Yeah, sit down here, Doc.

- I was in the
neighborhood so I thought

I'd drop by and say hello.

- Well, I'm glad you did.

- Hey, how about some coffee?

I've got some right
out in the kitchen.

- No, thanks, Harriet.

I really can't stay.

- Are you kidding?

It's the shank of the evening,
as you used to say back home.

What's the matter?

- Nothing.

You know, you have
a very strong pulse.

- Oh, thanks, Doc.

Would you like to come
out to the kitchen with me

and remove my appendix?

- Don't you listen to him, Doc.

You ought to be
glad we've got Doc

Williams in the neighborhood.

- Now that's OK, Harriet.

I'll get even with him
next time we go bowling.

- Oh, which reminds me, you're
going to the bowling club

luncheon tomorrow, aren't you?

- No, doggone it.

I'm afraid I can't make it.

- Oh, that's a shame.

How come?

- Well, Mrs. Fenwick wants
to stop by the office,

and the only time I have
open is my lunch hour.

And she's expecting
her baby tomorrow.

- Well, after all,
a baby comes first.

- Well, yes and no.

She's expecting it tomorrow.

I'm not expecting
it for two weeks.

- Well, that's the way it goes.

Sounds like you've got a pretty
busy day coming up tomorrow.

- Yeah, I'll be at the
hospital most of the afternoon,

and I have some appointments
at my office after dinner.

- Oh, well, then you
won't be able to go

bowling with us tomorrow night?

- No, I'm afraid not.

It looks like a
pretty busy week.

- Honestly, I don't
know how you keep it up.

- Well, most of
the time, I wonder

why I ever became a doctor.

But every now and
then, something

happens that makes
it all worthwhile.

Like this morning, for instance.

Johnny Bradshaw's wife,
Ruth, had her baby.

Seems like yesterday
I was treating

Johnny for the measles.

And as for Ruth, well, she was
one of the first babies I ever

delivered in this town.

I guess I'm getting old.

- Oh, that I refuse to believe.

- Well, all I know is it
gets tougher and tougher

to get up early these mornings.

- Well, you ought to take
some of the advice you

give your patients
and get to bed

and get some sleep at nights.

- You don't have to hint, Oz,
I was going to leave anyway.

- Well, I just
want to make sure.

- By the way, Oz, if you come
across a good cure for falling

hair, let me know, will you?

I'm starting to get
a little thin on top.

- Seems to me I've
read someplace

that blackstrap
molasses and wheat germ

are very good for that.

- Really?

- Yeah, as I understand
it, you pour the molasses

over the top of your head and
then sprinkle the wheat germ

on top of that.

- Well, thanks, Oz, I'll
have to give that a whirl.

- You, too, Doc.
- Well, I'll be seeing you.

Good night, Oz.
- Good night.

- Bye, Harriet.
- Bye, Doc.

- He is really a good guy.

- Oh, he sure is.

I wish he wouldn't
work so hard, though.

He's always doing
things for other people.

- Yeah, that's for sure.

- You know, if he were in
some other line of business,

they'd probably get
together and give him

a big testimonial
dinner or something.

- Hey, you know, that's an idea.

- What?

- A testimonial dinner for Doc.

- Oh, are you kidding?

He'd be so embarrassed, he
probably wouldn't even show up.

- Well, not necessarily.

We could make it
a surprise party.

Yeah, hey, that's an idea.

Why don't I make believe
I've sprained my ankle?

Then you phone Doc, tell
him to come right over.

We have a bunch of
people here, surprise.

- You know, it might
just work at that.

- Well, sure.

- Anyway, I think it's a good
idea to give him a party.

- Yeah, I'll start working on
it first thing in the morning.

Ooh!

- What's the matter?

- Nothing, I'm just practicing
up for the sprained ankle bit.

Oh, hi-ya, Thorny.

- Oh, hi, Oz.

Say, there's nobody sick
over at your house, is there?

- No, why?

- Well, I saw Doc Williams
coming out last night.

- Oh, he just
stopped by to tell us

he couldn't make
the luncheon today.

He can't go bowling
with us tonight either.

- Gee, that's too bad.

He sure is busy these days.

- Yeah, Harriet and I were
just talking about that

after you left.

Doc does so darn many
things for other people,

we figure it's about time
somebody did something for him.

- Well, I think I've done
quite a bit for him already.

- Oh?
Like what?

- Well, I've caught three
colds, wrenched my back,

and sat on a porcupine.

- Well, that's not exactly
what we had in mind.

Harriet and I thought
it might be a nice idea

to give him a little surprise
party, maybe even rent a hall

and give a testimonial
dinner in his honor.

- Hey, that's not a bad idea.

When are you planning
on having it?

- Well, we haven't
gotten that far yet.

Harriet and I will talk
that over later today.

- Harriet?

- Well, yeah.

- Wait a minute, we're
not planning on having

the wives in on this, are we?

- Well, of course.

Why not?

- Well, a testimonial dinner is
supposed to be a stag affair.

- Oh, not necessarily.

Beside, this was sort
of Harriet's idea,

and she's counting on going.

Not only that, I think it's only
fair that we include the wives

on an occasion like this.

- Well, I suppose so.

- Unless you can think of
some way of getting out of it?

- Well, if that's all
that's worrying you,

why don't you just tell her
it's going to be a stag affair?

- Oh, yeah, that's
easier said than done.

- What's the matter?

Afraid to tell her?

- Well, not exactly afraid.

- Well, all right.

Just go ahead and tell her.

- OK, I will.
- That's the spirit.

Every once in a while, a
man has to assert himself.

- OK.

- Oh, by the way, Oz.

- Yeah?

- After you've
explained it to Harriet,

would you mind stopping over
and explaining it to Catherine?

- Oh, here you are.

I was just outside talking
to Thorny about Doc's party,

and the thought occurred
to me that maybe you girls

would rather not go.

- You mean you don't want
us girls at the party?

- Well, no, no, no,
no, I didn't say that.

I just said that the
thought occurred to Thorny--

- I thought you said
it occurred to you.

- Harriet, if you don't
let me finish the sentence,

how can you ever tell what
I'm trying to tell you?

- Oh, I'm sorry.

For some silly
reason, I got the idea

you're trying to tell
me that you didn't

want us girls at the party.

- Oh.

- What were you
trying to tell me?

- Well, I-- oh, well,
you're busy here.

It really isn't that important.

- No, no, it's OK.
- Oh.

[doorbell]

Oh, I'll get it.

- Hi!
- Oh!

Come on in, girls.
- Hi!

- Hi, how are you?

- Well, Claire
Randolph just told us

about the surprise party you're
planning for Doc Williams,

and we think it's
a wonderful idea.

- It sounds like so much fun.

- Well, it was
really Ozzie's idea.

- Oh, I hope we're invited.
- Oh, sure.

I phoned you, but
you were all out.

- Oh, well, thanks.
- Yes, we were downtown.

Claire told us about the party.

It's going to be a
surprise, isn't it?

- Definitely.

- Oh, well, I hope the men
don't start blabbing around.

You know they are.

They can't keep a
thing to themselves.

- Well, I'm sure
they will this time.

- Oh, I hope so.
- Come on in, sit down.

- Oh, no, thanks, Harriet.
- Oh, we can't.

We've got to run along.
Mary is going to drive us home.

- Oh, well, I call and
give y'all the particulars.

- OK, thank you.
- See you later.

- Bye-bye.

- Good bye, girls.

- You know, I've never seen the
girls so pleased about anything

as they are about
this party for Doc.

It's been the same way
with everybody I've called.

- Oh, well, who have you called?

- Oh, just about everybody.

Oh, so you were about
to tell me something

when the girls came in.

- Oh, I was?

- Mm-hmm, something
about the party.

- Oh, yeah.

Well, as a matter of
fact, the girls just about

proved the point I
was trying to make.

- What point is that?

- Well, now, I know
they meant well,

but did you notice how they sort
of swarmed all over the place?

They kind of took charge?

- Go on.

- Well, see, Doc has to put
up with that sort of thing

every hour of every day.

You know, women telling
him about their operations,

complaining about their
imaginary ailments.

So, Thorny and I thought
it might be refreshing

if we made this a
stag affair, no wives.

- Well, that's just great.

After I've invited half the
girls in town and they've

all accepted.

- Well, let's say,
here's an idea.

Why don't you girls
give a party, too?

See, we could have our
stag affair at a restaurant

or something, and you
could have your hen party

right here at the house.

Now, I say "hen party,"
I mean, you know,

it's just an expression.

Well, how about it?

- What do you
mean, how about it?

It sounds to me like
it's all been decided.

- Oh, well, not necessarily.

I mean, what's your reaction?

I see.

And there's no chance
of your accommodating

our party for Friday night?

Yeah.

Well, thanks just the same.

Well, so much for the old
London Roast Beef Grotto.

- Couldn't handle it, eh?

- No, they're all booked
up for Friday night.

- Well, so far, we've
called four banquet halls,

eight restaurants, a hamburger
stand, and the Bombay Curry

Corner.

- It must be the busy season.

- Hey, here's one
that sounds great.

"Dining deluxe, large
parties especially.

Good food and Parisian floor
show three times nightly,

Crescent Club."

- That was raided and
closed two weeks ago.

- It sounded too good.

See, maybe we ought to postpone
Doc's party until it reopens.

- No.

See, wait a minute,
I have an idea.

There's a place called
Harold's Rotisserie.

I remember we ate
there about a year ago,

and the food was very good.

- Harold's Rotisserie.

H, H, H, H, H, H. Well,
it's not in this book.

- It's out on Oak
Street, I remember that.

Here we have it, right here.

- Hello?

- Hello, is this
Harold's Rotisserie?

- Well, it was, but it's
under new management.

- I see, but you still
have a nice restaurant.

- Oh, indeed we do.

Would you care to
make a reservation?

- Well, yes.

My name is Nelson.

Could you accommodate a party
of about 35 or 40 men for Friday

night?

- Yes, I believe so.

- Good.

Then let's make it
absolutely definite,

and we'll be right out to
complete the arrangements.

- We'll be looking for you.

- Well, thank you very much.

Goodbye.

Well, we're all set.

- Well, aren't you
taking a chance?

Maybe the place is all run down.

- Oh, no, I'm sure it's OK.

The lady sounded very
nice on the phone.

- Well, let's go.

You sure you remember
where this place is?

- Well, it should be across the
street here by the bookstore.

- Holy smoke, Oz, do
you see what I see?

- Oh, of course she did say
it was under new management,

you know.

- I know, Oz, but we can't give
a stag dinner at the Peek-a-Boo

Tea Room.

- I told the lady on the phone
it was absolutely definite.

What are we going to do?

- For the time being,
let's get out of here.

- Peek-a-boo!

- Peek-a-boo!

- Oh, peek-a-boo to
you, too, ladies.

- We've been waiting
for you, Mr. Nelson.

- Waiting for you.

- Oh, well, now, actually, my
friend here, Mr. Thornberry,

and myself have been kind
of talking this over.

- You don't mean to tell me
you've changed your mind?

- Changed your mind?

- Oh, well, no, no, no.

- No, no.

- That's good.

We planned a most
delightful menu for you.

Haven't we, Martha?

- Oh, yes, indeed.

Won't you come in?

We'll talk about it
over a nice cup of tea?

- Nice cup of tea.

- Oh.

- Now, wait a minute.

Oz, it's your fault
as much as mine.

Why don't you just tell
them that a tea room is not

exactly the place to
hold a stag dinner?

- What about yourself?

Telling them that
menu was perfect.

- Well, what else could I say?

They looked up at me with
their shiny little faces.

- I know, but cheese souffle
and a lacy little salad.

- Don't forget the prune
whip with the ladyfingers

for dessert.

- A fine stag party.

Sounds more like a
ladies' sewing circle.

- Wait a minute, Oz.

I think you've struck
on something there.

Let the girls switch their party
to the Peek-a-Boo Tea Room,

and we'll have Doc's
surprise party at your house.

- Oh, Thorny, I
couldn't ask Harriet

to do a thing like that.

You think I want to get
hit on the head again?

- Well, it's our only chance.

Oh, by the way,
how are you going

to get Doc over to the party?

- Oh, I thought you
knew about that.

Well, I'm going to
phone him at his office

and tell him I have
a sprained ankle.

He'll come right over.

- Well, it's even better
if it's at your house--

more believable.

- Yeah, you may have
something there.

What do we do about food?

- Well, I'll call
Schultz's Delicatessen,

make all the arrangements.
They have a catering service.

Meanwhile, you go
and talk to Harriet.

- OK.

I hate to do it.

I know just what she'll say.

Oh, Ozzie, I can't
do a thing like that.

- Oh, Ozzie, I won't
do a thing like that.

- Well, I was close.

- Besides, what are you
going to do for food?

- Well, Thorny's going to go
down to Schultz's Delicatessen

and make all those arrangements.

They're going to
cater the party.

- All I can say is I
hope Doc appreciates

all the trouble us women
are going to so you men can

give him a party.

- Now, wait a minute, Thorny.

You were going to make the
arrangements for the food

if I got the girls to
switch over to the tea room.

- Would you listen
to me, please?

Sit down.

Like I said, the catering
service was too darn expensive.

But I have a better idea.

- Go ahead, I'm listening.

- Why not invite the wives?

- Are you kidding?

You were the guy who insisted
on making this a stag

affair in the first place.

You said distinctly no wives.

- Oz, will you let
me finish, please?

What I mean is, let them have
their dinner at the tea room

first, then come back
to your house later

and make some sandwiches for us.

- You want to know what
Harriet would do if I

suggested a thing like that?

She'd hit me right over the
head with the frying pan.

And I wouldn't blame her.

So, Thorny and I thought that
perhaps after you girls had

finished dinner over
at the tea room,

you might like to
come back to the house

here and make some
sandwiches and stuff for us.

- Look, this is our night out.

You were the one who didn't
want us at the party, remember?

Now if you want some
sandwiches, make them yourself.

- Is that your final answer?

- Not quite.

[clang]

- By golly, you were right, Oz.

- Friends, neighbors, we're
gathered here this evening

to pay tribute to one
of the unsung heroes

of our community, Doc Williams.

- Hey, you look
pretty sharp, Oz.

- Oh.

- Is this for the party?

- Yeah, we're just going
to dress up as doctors,

sort of a little gag.

- How are you going to get
Doc Williams over here?

- Well, I'm going to
make-believe I've sprained

my ankle, and I'm going
to call him on the phone.

He'll come right over.

- We're going to
take in a show, Pop.

Have a good time.
We'll see you later.

- OK, boys.
- Have a good time.

- Thanks a lot.

Friends, neighbors--

[knocking]

Come in!

- Hi, Oz.

- Hi, hi-ya, Thorny.

I was just rehearsing my speech.
Hi-ya, Van.

- You know Jack
Fenwick, don't you?

- Oh, sure I do.

How's the wife, Jack?
- Fine, thanks.

She's over at the Tea
Room with the girls.

- Oh, good.

Expecting the baby
pretty soon, aren't you?

- The wife is, but Doc Williams
says she has a week or two yet.

- Well, that's the way it goes.

- Hey, Oz, here are some
of the other fellas now.

- Oh, come on in, fellows.

Hi, nice to see you.

- Just in time to go to work.

[music playing]

That's right, Ozzie Nelson.

I'm one of Doc Williams's
regular patients,

and I've sprained my ankle.

Ooh.

Yes, and I'd like the
doctor to get over here just

as soon as possible.

Ooh.

Yes, I'm in considerable pain.

[clinking]

May I have your attention,
please, gentlemen?

- When do we eat?

- Yeah, I thought this was
going to be a turkey dinner.

- Well, unfortunately, there
was a mix-up on the food,

but when you have good
fellowship, who needs food?

- Yeah, well, gentlemen, if
I may have your attention,

I'd like to get right
to the real purpose

of our little gathering
here this evening

and pay tribute to one of the
unsung heroes of our community,

our good friend, Doc Williams.

- Hear, hear.

[applause]

- Always willing
and ready to serve

any time of the day or night.

All you have to do is just pick
up your telephone and call him.

He'll rush right over, ready
to administer to your ailments,

whatever they may be.

Good, old Doc.

I'm only sorry he isn't
here with us tonight to...

- Gee, I wonder why
he hasn't shown up.

- Well, it's been a couple
of hours since I phoned.

- Well, are you sure
the nurse understood

about the sprained ankle?

- Well, Thorny, you heard me.

I even groaned
over the telephone.

- Yeah.

- So hard to figure out because
Doc is usually so reliable.

[phone rings]

Hey!

Shh, quiet!

Hello?

- Hello, Mr. Nelson?

- Yes.

- This is Dr. Williams's nurse.

I'm sorry I didn't
reach you sooner,

but the doctor won't
be able to make it over

to your house tonight.

He's been invited to
a testimonial dinner.

- Well, yes, I know.

That's here!

- No, there must
be some mistake.

This is a dinner given by some
ladies at the Peek-a-Boo Tea

Room.

- They can't do this to us!

Didn't you tell the doctor
about my sprained ankle?

Wasn't he concerned about it?

- Oh, yes, sir.

That's why I'm calling you.

Dr. Williams is
sending a specialist,

a Dr. Mueller from Vienna.

He should be there
any minute now.

- A specialist?

For a sprained ankle?

Well, and I don't even--

well, OK.

Thank you very much.

Goodbye.

This is a fine thing.

Doc is over at the
tearoom with the wives!

He's sending a
specialist over here,

some Dr. Mueller from Vienna!

- Mueller?

Sounds like a horse doctor.

[doorbell]

- Let's see him now.

- Ooh!

- Gentlemen, I am Dr. Mueller.

- Well, you're
just in time, Doc.

- Well, this is the
patient, I presume.

- Sorry, doc-- Ooh!

- This guy is a horse doctor!

- Ooh!

Ouch.

That's my ankle!

- Ooh, you look familiar to me.

Was you ever in Cincinnati?

- This guy's no doctor.

- I am so!

- I think I recognize
that voice...

And that high
intelligent forehead.

- Doc, you old phony, you!

- Hi-ya, fellas.

Sorry I'm late.

You know how it is
with surprise parties.

- Hey, Doc, let
me finish the job.

- You just about ruined me with
that toe hold bit, don't you?

- Well, I knew the
ankle was a gag, Oz.

The girls used the
same kind of trick

to get me over to the tea room.

They told me Betty Fenwick
was having her baby.

- Well, the only
thing, though, I really

did hurt my ankle just now.

I fell right down on the floor.

- Yeah, well, what do you
think kept me at the tea room

so long?

Jack, you better get
down to the hospital.

You're the father of
a nine-pound baby boy.

- Wow!

- Congradulations.

- I hope the baby
looks like Betty!

- Have a cigar, Doc.

- Hurry back.

- Boy, look at that guy go.

Well, at last, the guest
of honor has arrived.

- Well, you guys sure
pulled a surprise on me.

- Oh, what are you
talking about surprise?

Sit down here, Doc.

You knew about this all along.

- Sure.

- Well, some of my lady
patients talk quite a bit.

- Well, here we are.

The guest of honor is here and
the eating utensils are here.

- Yeah, all we need now is some
food and some dancing girls.

- Here we are, fellas.

We may not be dancing,
but we've got food.

- Where did you get this?

- Well, it was right out in
the oven if you'd only look.

- Well, what about the tea room?

- Oh, we had a
lovely time there.

The food was delicious.

- At first, we were going to
teach you fellas a lesson,

and then we got soft-hearted.

Besides, we wanted
to honor Doc, too.

- Aw, well.

- Well, OK, folks,
come on, let's eat!

- Just a second.

I'd just like to
say a few words.

I know we're all hungry.

I had a big, long
speech prepared,

but I'll just cut
it down to this.

I'll just say we all know
what a wonderful guy Doc is,

and what a fine doctor.

And a pretty good
actor, too, Herr Doctor.

- Ohh!

[applause]

- Thank you,
gentlemen and ladies.

And it's certainly nice to
have such wonderful friends.

And such hungry ones.

- Now, how about operating
on the bird, Doc?

- Yeah!

- Unfortunately,
gentlemen, I happen

to be all prepared for surgery.

- Take a second joint, Doc.

Three cheers for Doc!
How about it, boys?

Hip, hip--
- Hooray!

- Hip, hip--
- Hooray!

- Hip, hip--
- Hooray!

[applause]

[music playing]

- Turkey sandwich
is coming right up.

- Oh, I couldn't eat a
sandwich after that big dinner.

- But you'll try, won't you?

- Well, as long as
you were nice enough

to get out and make them, I
don't want to be inconsiderate.

- Force of habit sure
is a wonderful thing.

You know that turkey
Doc was carving?

- Uh-huh.

- He sewed it up again
after he was finished.

- What makes you
think it was Doc?

- Oh, it was Doc all right.
He left a spoon in it.

[music playing]

- Next week, "The Adventures
of Ozzie and Harriet,"

starring the entire
Nelson family--

- Ozzie.
- Harriet.

- David.

- And Ricky.

- --will be brought
to you by Hotpoint.

- And remember, Hotpoint
changes your viewpoint.

[twinkling]

- Automatically.

[music playing]

- On behalf of the Lambert
Company, makers of Listerine

Antiseptic, we'd like to extend
our hearty congratulations

to Ozzie and Harriet Nelson
for having been selected

by the readers of
"TV Radio Mirror

Magazine" as their
favorite husband and wife

team for the current
television season.