All language subtitles for The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet S03E23 A Lock of Hair 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DDP2 0 H 264-CRFW (1)_track4_[eng]

- "The Adventures of Ozzie
and Harriet," presented by--

- [SINGING] Hotpoint.

Hotpoint.

Hotpoint changes your
viewpoint automatically,

because Hotpoint makes the
finest things electrically.

New push button ranges that you
adore, refrigerator superstore.

So keep the food
that suits your mood.

Get your wishes and
wash those dishes.

Everyone knows Hotpoint is best
for clothes, washes them clean

and dries them smooth.

Your disposition it
will surely soothe.

Hotpoint brings all this to you
with the Nelson family, too.

- Ozzie--
- Harriet--

- David--

- Ricky--

- "The Ozzie and Harriet Show."

[theme music playing]

- And now, Hotpoint presents
America's favorite family

comedy, "The Adventures
of Ozzie and Harriet,"

starring the entire
Nelson family--

Ozzie, Harriet,
David, and Ricky--

with Don DeFore as Thorny.

- Oh.

Hiya, Thorny.

- Oh.

Hi, Oz.

- Hey, what seems
to be troubling you?

- Oh, nothing.

- Oh, come on now.

I can always tell when
something's bothering you.

You get those deep
lines in your forehead.

Uh, what's worrying you?

- These deep lines
in my forehead.

[audience laughter]

- Oh, come on.

Tell me about it.

- Well, to tell
you the truth, Oz,

I'm worried about my boy, Will.

- Oh, what's the matter?

Isn't he doing well in school?

- No, he isn't.

- Oh, what's his problem?

History?
Algebra?

- No.

- English?

- No, girls.

- Girls?

Oh, what's the trouble?

- Well, he doesn't seem to
be able to get any dates.

- Well, you know, kids go
through various stages.

Maybe the boy is just shy.

- Shy?

Have you ever seen his red car
with all the lettering on it?

"Let's play froggy.

Hop in."

[audience laughter]
"No hydromatic,

so watch that clutch."

[audience laughter]

You call that shy?

- Well, no.

- Well, Oz, it's hard to figure.

He's a nice looking
boy, has good manners.

- Oh, well, that's for sure,
but if it doesn't bother him,

why let it worry you?

- Well, it's hard to understand.

I don't mean to sound
boastful, but when I was a kid,

I was pretty popular
with the girls.

- Oh?

When did you start
to outgrow it?

[audience laughter]

- Please, Oz, none
of your jealousy.

- Well, as long as you're
going to start boasting,

I might as well tell you I was
a pretty fascinating fellow

myself in my callow youth.

- You see, that's the
trouble with you, Oz.

When anybody tries to have a
sensible discussion with you,

you start kidding.

- Oh, now wait a minute.

Who's kidding?

- You must be.

[audience laughter]

- It's just that some guys
have it and others don't.

Now, you take
yourself, for instance.

You're a personable
enough fellow,

but you just seem to
lack that certain spark

that the fairer sex goes for.

- And you have it, I suppose?

- Ah, ha.

- What are you smiling about?

- Oh, uh-- uh, just reminiscing.

When you were bragging
about your being a lady

killer before, it brought to
mind a little incident that

happened many years ago before
Harriet and I were married.

Uh, would you like
to hear about it?

- Not especially.

[audience laughter]

- Well, anyway, it seems that
there was this little girl,

and she wanted a
lock of my hair.

- What was her name?

- Uh, I don't seem
to remember a name.

- Oh, come now.

Surely, you must remember
the lucky creature's name.

[audience laughter]

- Let me think now.

- Oh, honestly Oz.

Sometimes, I get
so fed up with you.

Here I come out with
a legitimate problem

about my boy hoping to get
some neighborly advice from me,

and what do I get?

Some ridiculous story
about a silly girl

who you gave a lock
of your hair to.

- Wait a minute.

She wasn't a silly girl.

She was very attractive.

I don't see what's so
unusual about a little girl

wanting a lock of my hair.

- It's not only
unusual, it's fantastic.

[audience laughter]

Besides, if you remember
it so well, how come

you can't remember her name?

- Well, you're rushing me.

I'll think of it.

Just give me a few minutes.

- I'm sorry, Oz,
but I have a feeling

if I stay out here
any longer, you'll

give me a lock of your hair.

[audience laughter]

- Why, Thorny, I
didn't know you cared.

[audience laughter]

- Oh, what were you and
Thorny arguing about?

- Oh, we weren't arguing.

I was just kidding
him a little bit.

You know, he gets pretty
childish at times.

[audience laughter]

Also, I find out he
considers himself

rather fascinating
to the fairer sex,

or at least he did
when he was younger.

- Oh, really?

What did he say?

- Well, it-- it-- it was kind
of, a silly conversation,

but what really burned him up
was when I told him about this

beautiful girl that
wanted a lock of my hair.

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
- Now, wait a minute.

I thought you said it was Thorny
who was talking about what

a lady killer he was.

- Oh-- oh-- oh, yes he started
the whole thing, but then I--

I told him about this girl
in rebuttal, you might say.

- Oh, you mean you made
the whole thing up?

[audience laughter]

- Oh, it was all the truth.

See, this-- well, as I
say, it was kind of silly.

I was just pointing out
to him that some guys

are more attractive
to women than others.

As I said, some guys have
it, and some guys don't.

- Yeah, and I'm loaded with it.

[audience laughter]

- Rick, what are
you talking about?

- I'm being followed by
a whole pack of girls.

- You told me it
was just one girl.

- Yeah, but she's
all over the place.

[audience laughter]

- What's this all about?

- Oh, I mean, I don't know.

This girl just keeps
following me all around.

- Is she carrying
a butterfly net?

[audience laughter]

- All right, David.

Don't be such a wise guy.

- I just can't understand
why any girl would

want to follow you around.

- Maybe it's because
I'm your brother.

- Well, Dave, what have
you got to say to that?

- What can I say?
[audience laughter]

- She follows me when I go
to school in the morning.

She follows me when I come home.

- Well, maybe she just lives
nearby and leaves for school

at the same time you do.

- She even followed me
to the game Saturday.

- He's probably making the whole
thing up just to impress us.

- Oh, I don't know, Dave.

I've heard that Ricky's
quite a smoothie.

- Let's leave his chin out
of this, shall we, Mom?

[audience laughter]

- OK, David.

We all know you
shave once a week.

[audience laughter]

- Well, if this little
girl bothers you, Rick,

why can't you dodge her?

- I almost did.

I used the old FBI trick.

I went in the front
door of the drugstore,

walked down past
the comic books,

and ducked out the side door.

- And it didn't work?

- No, she caught
up with me again.

- Oh, back at the house?

- No, in the drugstore.

I went back to
read a comic book.

[audience laughter]

- I still find this very
difficult to believe.

- Oh, yeah?

Take a look out the
window, wise guy.

She's standing right out there.

- Where?

- There is a girl out there.

- Oh, yeah, she's
kind of cute, too.

- See, what'd I tell you?

- Say, Rick, if this little girl
really is following you around,

it might make a very
interesting topic

of conversation between a
certain neighbor of mine

and me.

- How come?

- Well, he's gotten the idea
someplace that the Thornberry

men are pretty hot stuff.

- This girl keeps
following me, Pop.

I can prove it.

- Well, yeah, I believe you.

I'd like to get some proof
for Mr Thornberry, though.

- Why don't you just
go someplace with me,

and you can watch
and see for yourself.

- Yeah, that's an idea.

Where will we go?

- Oh, anywhere.

Say, like, the malt shop?

[audience laughter]

[cheerful music]

- Well, come on, Pop.

- I'm right behind you.

- I'd rather you walk beside me.

I'm beginning to get a complex.

- Well, let's not be too
obvious about this now, son.

We don't want the
little girl to catch on.

- Hi, Oz.

- Oh, Thorny, You're just
the one I'm looking for.

Uh, would you like to take
a little walk with us?

- No.
No, thanks.

- Oh, come on.

Just take a little
stroll down the street.

- What's your idea?

Going to give the
neighborhood women a thrill?

- Come on, son.

- [SINGING] I'm just
wild about Ozzie.

- Just ignore him.

[audience laughter]

- [SINGING] Oh, Ozzie.

Oh, Ozzie.

How you can love.

- What was that all about, Pop?

- Oh, Mr. Thornberry's
warped idea of a big joke.

[cheerful music playing]

- Hey, there she is.

She just ducked behind the car.

- Oh, yeah, I can see
her feet sticking out.

Let's make believe we don't see
her, we don't embarrass her.

[cheerful music playing]

- She's still back there.

[cheerful music playing]

- I have an idea.

Why don't we kind
of hide in a doorway

here until she comes by, and
I'll step out and ask her

what she wants.

- That's a good idea.

- Here she come.

[cheerful music playing]

- Oh, hello.

- Hello.

- Uh, were you looking for Ricky
to talk to him about something?

[cheerful music playing]

- All right, look at her go.

- Yeah.

Eh, it looks like we scared her.

Well.

- I thought we were
going to the malt shop.

- Oh, I'm sorry,
forgot all about it.

- You scared me
there for a second.

[audience laughter]

[cheerful music playing]

- Uh, just as a
matter of information,

are you dusting or
looking out the window?

- I was looking for Ricky.

- Ricky or the little
girl who's following him?

- Well, she followed him when
he left for the baseball field

this afternoon,
and I just wanted

to see if she followed him home.

- You know, you'd think he
could duck out of her sight

if he really tried hard
enough, wouldn't you?

- In that red checkered
shirt and those orange

fluorescent socks?

[audience laughter]

- Oh, I forgot about those.

- Oh, here he comes,
and the little girl

is about a house behind him.

This is the darndest thing.

I just can't understand it.

- Well, you know the old
saying like father, like son.

- Yeah, I just
can't understand it.

[audience laughter]

- Oh, hi, Rick.

- Oh, hiya, Pop.

- I see you had
company again today.

- Yeah, I just can't shake her.

I even tried eating onion
sandwiches at school yesterday.

- Well, why don't you ask
her what it's all about?

- I try, but every time
I start, she runs away.

- Hey, Rick, your
shadow's outside.

- Thank you, David.

That's my brother David with
the late, late, late news.

- You know, I hate to
admit it, but you sure

seem to have made a
hit with that girl.

- I don't know why.

I didn't do anything.

- Well, Rick, you
see some men are just

more attractive to
women than others.

In your case, it's probably
something you've inherited.

- You mean like my big feet?

[audience laugher]

- No, son.

I had in mind something
you might have inherited

from my side of the family.

[clearing throat] This is-- only
kidding, my dear, only kidding.

Well, look at it this way.

Now, here's Will Thornberry.

The poor kid can't
even get a date

while one of the Nelson
men, without even trying,

has a little girl chasing
him all over town.

- Well, if I might
interrupt, it's

time one of the Nelson
women cleared this thing up.

- I think I'll step
outside and have

a word with the little girl.

- Wait a minute, Mom.
Don't commit me to anything.

- Don't worry, I won't.
[audience laughter]

[cheerful music playing]

- Well, if anybody can drag
out all the details, it's Mom.

- Don't I know it.

[audience laughter]

- Boy, look at her go.

- She sure is a good runner.

- Well, that was the fastest
conversation on record.

[audience laughter]

- I think she's still running.

- Yeah, she ran when I
tried to talk to her, too.

- So what is this strange power
you have over women, Ricky?

- You're kidding,
of course, Mom.

- No, I really mean it.

- Oh, cut it out.

- You know, if I didn't see it,
I couldn't possibly believe it.

- You mean about
the little girl?

- No, about my little brother.

For the first time in his
life, he's actually blushing.

[audience applause]

[theme music playing]

[cheerful music playing]

[knocking]

- May I come in, Mrs. Nelson?

- Oh, sure, come
right in, George.

- Here, have a cookie.

- No, thank you.

I'm not supposed to eat
cookies so close to mealtime.

- Oh, well, that's a good idea.

- I was looking for Ricky.

Is he anywhere
about the premises?

- No, I haven't seen him.

Is there anything you
want me to tell him?

- Well, I don't know
if you know it or not,

but a girl's been following
him for almost a week now.

- Yes, we've seen
her several times.

- I thought I'd warn him.

I just found out why
she's following him.

- Oh, really?

Why?

- Hold your hat, Mrs. Nelson.

- She wants a lock of his hair.

[audience laughter]

- I'll be darned.

- That was exactly my reaction.

[audience laughter]

- Thanks for the
warning, George.

I'll tell him to be careful.

- Are these the cookies
you had reference to?

- Yes, they are.

Say, I have an idea.

Why don't you put a couple
of them in your pocket

and eat them after dinner?

- That was exactly what
I was hoping you'd say.

You must be psychic,
Mrs. Nelson.

- No, not really.

Let's just say I know
boys pretty well.

[audience laughter]

[tense music playing]

[chuckling]

- Well, hiya, Thorny.

You're just the guy
I've been looking for.

I have some interesting
news for you.

- Well, good, Oz.
Let's have it.

- Well, I have some
pretty definite evidence

that at least one
of the Nelson men

is quite devastating
to the fairer sex.

- Hmm, well, it couldn't be you.

Let me see now.

Is it David or Ricky?

[audience laughter]

- It's a case of history
repeating itself.

It-- it-- it's Ricky.

There's this cute little girl
who follows him all over,

Thorny.

This has been going on for
about three or four days.

When he goes to
school in the morning,

there she is right behind him.

If he crosses a vacant lot,
she's right behind him.

If he goes to the
library, the soda store,

wherever he is, there's the
little girl about uh, 20 or 30

paces behind him.
- Well, OK.

What makes you think
she's following him?

[audience laughter]

- Are you kidding?

Uh-- uh-- an--
an-- and as I say,

it's history repeating itself.

Remember I told
you the other day

about this little girl years
ago wanting a lock of my hair?

- Mm-hmm.
Well, go ahead.

Go ahead.
I'm listening.

[audience laughter]
- Well--

[audience laughter]

--it's the darndest coincidence.

Uh, here's the same situation.

It seems, according to
Harriet, that this little girl

wants a lock of Ricky's hair.

[laughter]

- That's what I
love about you, Oz.

When you make up a story,
you make up a good one.

[audience laughter]

- No.

Here comes Ricky now.

You can see for yourself.

[tense music playing]

See, there he is.

- Yeah, there's Ricky, but
where's the little girl?

- Oh, she'll be
along any minute.

Hey, Rick.

Over here, son.

- Oh, hiya, Pop.

- I want to talk to
you for a second.

- I still don't see
the little girl.

- Oh, I bet you I'm right.

- Bet you a dollar.

- Oh, hi, Mr. Thornberry.

- Say, Rick, your father and
I here have a little wager.

- Wait a minute.

There she goes now.

She just ducked
behind the bushes.

- I don't see her.

- Oh, she was
there a minute ago.

She's fast.

You got to keep your eye on her.

Uh, Rick, I was just
telling Mr. Thornberry

about this little girl at that
follows you all over, no matter

where you-- tell him about it.
- Well, that's just it.

Every place I go from
morning til night,

she's right behind me.

It's getting kind
of embarrassing.

- Well, I would worry
too much about it, son.

It's just a manifestation
of the old Nelson charm.

- Well, I say, Oz, there must
be some believable explanation.

[audience laughter]

- I told you.

It's uh, history
repeating itself.

I told you why she's--

[cheerful music playing]

Hey, there she goes now.

Ask her for yourself.

- Well, I will.

- Better hurry.

- Little girl-- little girl,
can I speak to you for a minute?

- Boy, you'll never catch her.

- Hey, she's stopping.

How about that?

- Oh, I wonder how come.

- I don't know.

She stopped when Mr. Thornberry
turned over his coat lapel

and pointed to
something under it.

- Now, don't tell me he's still
wearing that honorary fireman's

badge.

[audience laughter]

- How come she's
holding up her hand?

- Well, I don't know.

- Here he comes back.

Looks kind of puzzled.

- I can't believe it.

I just can't believe it.

- All right what did she say?

- Well, Oz, I thought
you were kidding me,

but she really wants a
lock of Ricky's hair.

- Well, sure.

- A lock of my hair?

- Oh, well, yeah.

Didn't you know that, son?

- Heck no.
Are you sure?

- Yeah, the little
girl just told me,

and I know she's
telling the truth.

- Oh, well yeah.

We saw you
administering the oath.

[audience laughter]

It's just like I say, Thorny.

History repeats itself.

Like father, like son.

- Well, she'd better not
try and get any of my hair.

- Oh, Rick.

You've got to be
understanding and gallant

about a thing like that.

- Gee, Pop, hair don't
grow on trees, you know.

[audience laughter]

- Well, all she wants
is a lock of your hair.

She's a pretty cute little girl.

- I'll think it over.

I'll see her tomorrow.

- Rick, have you taken
a good look at her?

She sure is cute.

- Maybe she'd like two locks.

[audience laughter]

[cheerful music playing]

- You really shouldn't
get any dessert.

You hardly touched your dinner.

- I just wasn't hungry, Mom.

- I think he's sick-- love sick.

That little girl finally
caught up with him.

- OK, David eat your pie.

- Mom, if you were my age,
would you go out with me?

- Well, of course I would.

- I guess you're
not very particular.

- Now-- now, just a minute.

I resent that, old boy.

- It's nothing personal, Pop.

It's just me.

I'm a social failure.

- Does this have anything
to do with a girl who's

been following you?

She did get a lock of
your hair, didn't she?

- Yes, ma'am, today at
school during lunch.

- Well, did she
seem happy about it?

- Yeah, I guess.

- Whoa, sounds like you
made a big hit with her.

- Some hit.

After she got the hair,
I started to talk to her,

she just laughed
at me and ran off.

- Oh, what seemed
to be the trouble?

- I don't know.

I'm just a beaten,
unlovable old man.

[audience laughter]

- I wouldn't feel bad about it.

- I've had girls give me the
quick brush before but never

the quick snip.

[audience laughter]

- You know something, Pop?

- What?

- I'm through with
women as of now.

[audience laughter]

[cheerful music playing]

- Hello, Harriet.

- Hi, Thorny.

- Hi, Heartthrob.

- Very funny.

- Ah, the Nelson charm.

[audience laughter]

- What are you talking about?

You spoke to the
little girl yourself.

She told you she wanted
a lock of Ricky's hair.

- Yeah.

Oh, you Nelson men, you.

[audience laughter]

- Then you know about it, huh?

- Why, sure.

My boy Will was invited
to the big dance

the Blue Jeans are giving.

- Well, what's that got
to do with anything?

- Well, for your
information, the Blue Jeans

is a girls club at
school, and they just

finished initiating
their new members.

Oh, some of the
crazy things they do.

- You mean like inviting
Will to their dance?

- Please, Oz, no jealousy.

You know one of the
girls had to do?

- What?

- She had to find the boy with
the craziest haircut in school

and follow him around till
she got a lock of his hair.

[audience laughter]

Well, like father, like son.

Oz, tell me about the girl who
wanted a lock of your hair.

- Will you forget about the
whole thing please, Thorny?

- Oh, come on now, Oz.

I want to hear that part
where you can't even

remember who the
girl was who couldn't

wait to get a lock of
that curly, brown hair.

- Thorny, we're not
alone, you know.

- Oh, well if you
two will excuse me,

I'll go splash some cold water
on a couple of burning ears.

- You see, Oz, you
got to be careful

when you make up a story.
It always catches up with you.

- I tell you the whole
thing is absolutely true.

- Oh, gosh.

Now tell me, how can a guy
like you ever fascinate

a woman to the point where she
wanted a lock of your hair?

- Well, I don't know, but I
tell you it's true, Thorny.

- In view of the
discussion, I was just

wondering whether this locket
might not be interesting to you

fellow?

- What do you want
to do with this?

- Open it up.

- So how about that,
a lock of hair.

- Well, Harriet!

Well, then you were the girl.

[audience laughter]

Well, how about that?

Well, maybe in
the future, you'll

believe my little stories.

- Well, I must admit,
it does add up.

- Well, of course it adds up.

- I'll just say one thing.

Only a cad like you could forget
it was your own little wife who

was involved in such a
tender and romantic episode.

- What are you
talking about, Thorny?

- Goodnight, Oz, and
happy explaining.

[audience laughter]

[tense music playing]

- Good old Thorny.

- Ah, good old Thorny.

- Yeah.

[audience laughter]

- I'm waiting, dear.

- Oh, well, it slipped my
mind for a minute there.

Now, I remember the whole
incident quite clearly.

- Oh, you're just saying that.

- Uh, no-- no-- uh, we
were in Palisades Park,

and we'd been riding the
Ferris wheel for quite a while.

And then we came out, and we
rode through the Tunnel of Love

several times.

And we got out of
that, and then I

remember I didn't have my
fraternity pin with me.

And you said you would
settle for a lock of my hair,

and you've been carrying
it around with you

in the locket all these years.

- 18 to be exact.

- No, must be longer than that.

We've been married--

18 is David's age.

- It's also David's hair.

[audience laughter]

- David's hair?

- His baby hair.

[audience laughter]

- Well, how come
you told Thorny--

- I didn't tell Thorny anything.

I showed it to him and let
him draw his own conclusions.

Besides, having succumbed
to the Nelson harm myself,

I didn't want anybody
to run it down.

[audience laughter]

- Oh.

Yes.

Oh, how about that?

That's darned...

How about that?

[audience laughter]

- How about that?

It was fun, too.

Besides, I think I
underestimated the Nelson

charm.

Tell me more about the Tunnel
of Love and the Ferris wheel.

[audience laughter]

- The Ferris wheel...

Well, it goes round,
and round, and round.

- I'll wait.

You have to get off sometime.

[crowd applause]

[triumphant music playing]

[cheerful music playing]

- Lock the doors
and windows, Mom.

If anybody asks for
me, I'm not at home.

- Hey, wait a minute.
Come back here.

What's this all about?

- It's another one of
those darned girls clubs.

They call themselves
the Indian Maids.

- Are they having an initiation?

- Yeah, another
girl's following me.

I got to hide someplace.
- Well, why hide?

Why don't you just give
her a lock of your hair

and be done with it?
- Lock of my hair?

Heck, this one's
carrying a tomahawk.

[cheerful music playing]

- You can find where to
buy your new Hotpoint

by checking your local
classified telephone directory.

Look for Hotpoint under
the appliance you want.

Ask your local Hotpoint dealer
to show you the new Hotpoint

ranges, the new Hotpoint
refrigerators, the new Hotpoint

automatic washers and dryers,
and the new Hotpoint automatic

dishwashers.

Next week, "The Adventures
of Ozzie and Harriet,"

starring the entire
Nelson family--

Ozzie, Harriet,
David, and Ricky--

will be brought to
you by Antizyme.

Listerine Antizyme toothpaste
stops the major cause

of tooth decay every
minute of every day.

- Well, good night, folks.

We'll see you again next week.

- Goodnight, and
remember, Hotpoint

changes your viewpoint,
automatically.

- Yes, sir.

That's what I always say, boy.

- What do you always
say, little man?

- Hotpoint changes
your viewpoint.

Automatically.

[audience applause]

- The part of the little girl
was played by Jennifer Lindsay.

George was George Winslow.

This is Verne Smith speaking.

[theme music playing]