All language subtitles for The.Adventures.of.Ozzie.and.Harriet.S02E03.The.Boys.Paper.Route.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP2.0.H.264-ZEW_track3_[eng]

- Hi.

This is the season of
the year for reminiscing.

We'd like to turn back
the clock a ways, 13 years

to be exact, and bring you
one of our television shows

from 1952, when David and
Ricky were just little guys.

We hope you like it.

[theme song]

"The Adventures of
Ozzie and Harriet,"

starring the entire
Nelson family.

Here's Ozzie, who plays
the part of Ozzie Nelson.

And of course, his lovely wife
Harriet as Harriet Nelson.

The older of the Nelson boys,
David, appears as David Nelson.

And his younger brother,
the irrepressible Ricky,

played by Ricky Nelson.

The Nelsons' next
door neighbor, Thorny,

is played by Don DeFore.

[rattling]

- Ozzie?

- Oh.

Kind of startled me there.

- So I see.

Is that the way they're fixing
screen doors these days,

by reading old newspapers?

- Oh, no, no, no, no.

I was gonna start
work on it right now.

- You mean you
hadn't started yet?

- Uh, no.

That's not exactly what I mean.

- What do you mean?

- Well, yes.

- Yes, what?

- Yes, I guess that is
exactly what I mean.

- Very clever, aren't you?

Getting out of helping
to move the furniture.

- Oh, well, I was gonna fix the
screen door in just a minute.

I got to reading some
of these papers here,

and they have some
interesting articles in them.

For instance, Harriet,
did you realize

how many people were injured
in their own homes last year?

- I have no idea.

I'll tell you this much, though,
unless you fix that screen

door, they're liable to have
one more to add to the report.

- Easy with a hammer.

- I was just gonna
hand it to you.

- I bruise very easily on
top of the head, you know.

- Let me see that paper.

Did you read this article
about the new swimming

pool they're proposing?
- No.

I didn't.
- You should read that.

They're proposing a big
playground public swimming pool

over on Hudson Avenue.

You know, where those
vacant lots are.

Read that.

Town has to buy up
some property first

before they can do
any constructing.

Just read it.

If they could only
convince enough people

it'd be a wonderful
thing, they could probably

have it finished by the summer,
when the kids will need it.

Ozzie?

- Yes.

- Are you listening to me?

- I'm trying to
read this article.

- What do you want
to read that for?

I just told you what it says.

- You're really all fired up
about this thing, aren't you?

- Well, I think it's
a wonderful thing.

As a matter of fact, we had
a big discussion about it

at the Woman's Club
meeting this afternoon.

- You mean, some of the
women were opposed to it?

- Well, yes.
You know how it is.

There are always some people
who are against anything,

even before they know
what it's all about.

- Well, maybe they
have good reasons.

- Well, I think
they should at least

listen to what it's all about.

- Well, I suppose so.

Did you finally
give up on the idea?

- Oh, no.

Not by any means.

Catherine Thornberry and I
made a list of all the women

at the meeting who opposed
it, and we're going

to work on them individually.

- Oh, sounds like a very
ambitious undertaking.

- Well, it may take
a little while,

but we're going to see
every single person

in that little book.

There's no reason in the
world why those kids shouldn't

have that swimming pool.

- What's this about
a swimming pool?

- Careful, David,
it might be a trick.

- Well, what kind of a
trick were you expecting?

- Well, have you finished
moving all the furniture yet?

- Yes, I'm afraid so.

- Heck, I was the
one who was afraid.

- Oh, now wait a minute.

Don't tell me you're
afraid of a little work.

- Oh, look who's talking.

- OK.

OK.

- Maybe we better wait till
tomorrow afternoon, David.

- Wait a minute.
What's this?

Wait for what?

- Oh, we want to start
delivering newspapers, Pop.

- Delivering newspapers?

- I told you we
should've waited.

- Now-- now, wait a minute.

You two guys are figuring
on delivering papers?

- Yes, sir.

- We should've waited till
tomorrow afternoon to ask him,

David.

- When do you propose to
start delivering the papers?

- Tomorrow morning.

- Oh, I don't know.

- Well, gee, Pop, we got
it all set and everything.

- What paper is it, David?

- It's a brand new one.

It's only been out
a couple of days.

- Oh, yes.

I understand they've
done some very good

editorials on the new
playground and swimming pool.

- Yeah.
It's a neat paper, boy.

- Do you guys realize how
much work there is involved

to having a paper route?

First of all, you've gotta get
a whole list of subscribers,

you know?

- Oh, they took care
of all that, Pop.

- What do you mean?

- They gave us a list
of people to deliver to.

- If we get some extra people,
then they give us a bonus.

Isn't that swell?

- Well, it certainly
sounds fair.

- Mom?

- Yes, dear?

- What's a bonus?

- Well, that means
something extra.

- Yeah, I think
they give prizes.

- Well, what time in
the morning do you guys

have to get up to
deliver these papers?

- A man's gonna meet us on
a corner downtown at 5:30.

- 5:30?

- Sure.

- Say, 5:30 is awful early.

How do you guys expect to get
up by 5:30 in the morning?

- Heck, I thought
the man said 5:00.

- We can do it, Pop?

- Well, evidently, your mother
and I don't have much choice.

You guys seem to have
made all the arrangements.

- Yeah, we don't
mess around, boy.

- Remember, now,
fellas, this is strictly

a business proposition.

You fellas have
started this job.

I want you to complete it
and do a good thorough job.

- Oh, sure, Pop.

We've got a list
here and everything.

- And look at all those names.

- See?

- This is a pretty
wrinkled up old list.

You won't even be
able to read this.

- Well, you can put the names
in the little book, dear.

- I'll help you.
- Yes.

That's right.

Your mother's absolutely right.

If you're gonna do a job, do
it thoroughly and do it well.

Now, come on in the living room.

We'll make out a nice fresh
list so you can read it.

- Ozzie?

- Yes, dear.

Won't work, huh?

- No., I'm afraid not.

- Well, looks like you
guys will have to get along

without your dear old dad.

- Don't worry about them, dear.
I'll give them a hand.

Come on, fellas.

- Better luck next time, Pop.

- I finished with
the names, Mom.

- You add the addresses, too?
- Yep.

See?
- Well, that's fine.

Look, just draw a
line down here now.

- What for?

- Well, that's so you can
keep track of the money

when you collect it.
- Oh, boy.

Money.

- Yeah, I bet we get a lot, boy.

- Yeah, the girls will
really go after me then.

- Girls?

- Well, sure.

I'm not getting any
younger, you know?

- I hope we get some
new subscribers.

- Oh, I'm sure you will, dear.

- Only trouble, everybody I
know already takes a paper.

- Well, then, you should
just point out to them

some good reason why they should
take the paper that you're

delivering, too.

- Don't worry, David.

Let me handle that.
- And what are you gonna do?

Put on the pressure?
- Heck.

Who needs pressure?

I have a very
unusual personality.

- I have a feeling you fellas
are going to do just fine.

Look, why don't you go
upstairs to bed now?

If you're going to get
up at the crack of dawn,

you'll need some sleep.

- OK, Mom.

- Ozzie, wake up, dear.

Wake up.

- I-- I'll fix the screen door
first thing in the morning,

Harriet.
- Come on, dear.

Wake up.

I've got something to tell you.

- Oh.

What time is it?

1:00?

- No, I'm afraid not.

It's 5 after 5:00?

- 5 after 5:00?

Harriet, that's the
middle of the night.

- I know, dear, and
we need your help.

- What's the trouble?

- Well, David seems to
have a cold coming on,

and I don't think he should
go out in this wet weather.

It's taking too
much of a chance.

- Oh, does he feel bad?

- Well, I don't know.

He was coughing and sneezing,
so I didn't wake him up.

- Oh, well, Ricky can
handle the job OK.

He's a big boy.

- Oh, dear, look you know Ricky.

When David gets a cold,
Ricky gets one, too.

- He's got the sniffles, too?

- Well, no, but I am a
little worried about him.

- Well, what's the
matter with him?

- Well, he seems to be
sleeping so restlessly.

- You mean, he's
still asleep, too?

- Yes.

He was probably so
excited last night,

he couldn't get to sleep.

I just didn't have the
heart to wake him up.

- But, Harriet, this is
the boy's responsibility.

The papers have to be delivered.

- I know, dear, and
that's where you come in.

- Where I come in?

- Or rather that's
where you go out.

- Oh, now, wait a
minute, Harriet--

- Come on.
Just this one morning, dear.

Now, don't argue.

I've got all your
clothes laid out

and the coffee's on the stove,
and your coat's in the hall,

the route book's
down on the table,

and there'll be a
nice breakfast waiting

for you when you get back.

- Well, since you seem
to have everything

all figured out so well, why
don't you deliver the papers?

- Well, I'd like to, dear,
but I'm going somewhere else.

- Where, for goodness sakes?

- Back to bed.

It's still the
middle of the night.

[sleepy music]

- Hey.

Hey, you.

Hey.

Wake up, fella.

- Oh.

- Are you Nelson?

- Yeah.

- David or Ricky?

- David?

No, no, no.

I'm Ricky.

I mean, oh, I'm--

no.

I'm the boys' father.

I'm going to take
over the paper route.

The boys are sick this morning.

- Oh.

It's nothing serious, I hope.

- No, no, no.

Just a little sniffle.

Oh.

These are the papers
I'm supposed to deliver?

- Yeah.
That's right.

- Gee, I'm sorry I
had to wake you up.

You-- you looked so peaceful
there with your head

laying back against the mailbox.
- Oh.

I'm not used to these
early morning hours.

- I know what you mean.
It's pretty rough all right.

[yawn]

- Sorry.

- It's all right.

- Oh, well, I'll be on my way.

- You got me doing it.

Hey, you got your route book?

- Yeah.

I got it right in
my back pocket.

[yawn]

- Still pretty groggy, huh?

- No.

I'm wide awake now.
- Good, good.

- Thanks a lot.
- OK.

- See you.

- Take it easy, now.

Hey.

I wonder who's bike that is.

- Oh, for goodness sakes.

That's the boys'.

Guess I am a little fuzzy yet.
- OK.

Wake up now.
- Yeah.

I'm not used to
getting up so early.

- I'll see you.
- OK.

Oh.

Morning, Dan.

- Holy smokes.
Hey, Ricky.

- Huh?

- Ricky, get up.

- Is it 5:00 already?

- It's almost 8:00.

We were supposed to
be on the job at 5:30.

- I guess we're kinda late, huh?

- Kinda late?

We'll probably get
fired for this.

- Golly, we haven't
even started yet.

- After all Pop told us,
we don't even get up.

- And they probably
won't even pay us.

- Of course we won't get paid.

We haven't done any work.

- Boy, what a gyp that is.

- What do you expect?

- You fellas up?

How do you feel?
- Awful.

It's almost 8:00.

And this is our
first day of work.

- Yeah, and our last, too.

- Well, you can
both stop worrying.

Your father took over your
paper route this morning.

- He did?
- Mhm.

Wasn't it nice of him?
- Oh, gee.

Good old Pop.

- How come you didn't
wake us up, Mom?

- Oh, I don't know.

You were coughing quite a bit
and Ricky was sort of restless.

It was raining outside, too.

As a matter of fact, it's
still raining a little.

I don't know, I just didn't
have the heart to wake you up.

- Well, heck, Mom, we
made out all right.

- Yeah.
I feel great.

- Well, you can start
on Monday morning.

- Make sure we get up, Mom.

- OK.

- Can't let Pop
do this every day.

- Well, if he really
enjoys it, David.

- No, sir.

When I take a job,
I like to do it.

- Big man.

- Boys, you better get up.

Your father will be
home in a few minutes.

- OK, Mom.

It sure was nice of Pop
to deliver our papers

for us, wasn't it?
- Yeah.

It sure was.

I wonder if Pop did a good job.

- Well, I don't see
why he shouldn't.

- Pop's kinda sleepy when
he has to get up early.

- Oh, I'm sure he's
done a good job.

Come on, boys.

Get dressed.

- You know, I like
being a newspaper man.

- Good for you.

- It sure is swell when
you start off the first day

with the first day off.

- Well, good morning, everybody.
- Oh, hiya, Pop.

- Hello, dear.
- Hi.

- Still raining outside?

- Oh, it's just about stop.

I think it's gonna be
a nice day after all.

- Oh, that's good.

Why don't you
relax for a minute?

Breakfast is almost ready.

- Oh, that's fine.

I'm just about starved.

Boy, that early morning air
really builds up an appetite.

- My, aren't your
cheeks rosy and red.

- Oh, thank you, dear.

- Yeah, your eyes are too, Pop.

- Oh.

I never felt better in my life.

Boy, you don't know what
you're missing until you

get up early in the morning.

- You're missing a lot
of sleep, huh, Pop?

- Well, no.

No, that's not what I mean.

There's a certain sparkle and
tang in that early morning air.

Really refreshing.

How are you boys feeling now?

- Oh, swell.

- Oh, that's good.
- Hi, Pop.

- Oh, hi, Dave.
- Gee.

I'm sorry we didn't
get up in time.

- Oh.
- How'd everything go?

- Oh, just fine, son.

Just fine.

- That's good.

- I think it's gonna be
a nice day after all.

- Oh, swell.
- Yeah.

It was coming down pretty heavy
there earlier this morning.

- Thanks a lot for
delivering the papers for us.

- Oh, that's all right, Dave.

As a matter of fact,
I sort of enjoyed it.

It's very invigorating.

- Oh, by the way, the
Johnsons have a new dog.

- Oh, really?

- Yeah.

- A pretty big one, too.

- What kind is he?

- I'm not sure.

I didn't look back to see.

- Anything special you'd
like for breakfast, dear?

- Oh, no, no, no.

Anything at all, Harriet.

I've built up a
tremendous appetite.

Boy, that early morning air
really does things for you.

I feel marvelous.

- Well, you sure
didn't get much sleep.

- Well, David, actually people
get a little too much sleep.

You don't need a lot of sleep.

That cool early morning
air, that really sweeps away

the old cobwebs.

- Yeah, I guess so.

Hey, we better mark
down out deliveries.

- What?
Do we have to do that?

- Sure.
We gotta keep a record.

- We can do it after breakfast.

- Well, OK.

Boy, I sure am hungry.

- Yeah, me, too.

Boy, that early morning air
sure does something to a guy.

- You weren't out in
the early morning air,

you were in bed asleep.

- Yeah, I know, but
my window was open.

- I'll have breakfast
ready in a minute.

- OK.

Thanks, Mom.

- Pop, do you have
our route book?

Pop?
- Hey, Pop.

- Shh.

Ricky, let's let him sleep.

Come on.

- Have you boys finished?

- Yes, Mom.

Should we go in
and wake up, Pop?

- Oh, no.
Let's let him rest for a while.

- What about our book?

- Oh, that's right, your
list of subscribers.

Well, come on.

Let's see if we can get
it out of his pocket

without disturbing him.

It's probably in
his coat pocket.

Be careful now.
Don't wake him up.

- It's not in here.

- Not in here either.

- Well, maybe it's
in this pocket.

Here.

Roll him over a
little left, David.

Careful now.

- Boy, it sure is hidden.

- Yeah, I'll say.

- Oh, it's not in here either.

- Maybe it's in
his pants pocket.

Here.
Lean him forward a little bit.

- Easy does it, Ricky.

- He's going to fall!

- Why didn't you
hold him, Ricky?

- I was trying to.

- Shh.

- How about that?

He's still asleep.

- Well, we got the book anyway.

- You think he's all right?

- Of course he is, isn't he?

He's still breathing.

- Well, this is strange.

This isn't your route book.

- Well, that looks like
my route book over there.

It is my route book.

What book did Pop have?

- Get your bicycles, boys.

We've got a lot of work
and explaining to do.

- Anybody home?

Oz?

Hey.

Holy mackerel.
Oz, come on.

Wake up.

Hey, hey, hey.

- Oh.

Hi, Thorny.

- Hi yourself.

How can you sleep all
curled up like that?

- Well, I wasn't
sleeping exactly.

I was just resting
my eyes a little bit.

- Resting your eyes?

You were sound asleep and
curled up like a pretzel.

You realize it's 11:30?

- By golly, you're right.

I guess I must've
dozed off a little.

- Yeah.
You must've.

Look, Oz, I came over to
ask you about something.

- Well, go ahead.

- Well, a little while ago
a newsboy rode by our house

on a bicycle.

- Well, so what?

- Well, ordinarily nothing,
except this newsboy

happened to be your wife.

- Harriet?

- Yeah.

What gives, Oz?

- Well, I don't know.

- Of course, it really
isn't any of my business,

and that's why I'm interested.

- What was she doing?

- Delivering papers.

- Gee, I wonder if
this has anything

to do with my little
chore this morning.

- What little chore was that?

- Well, you see, David and
Ricky have a paper route now.

- Well, evidently,
Harriet does, too.

- No, no, no.

Harriet has nothing
to do with it.

I delivered the boys' papers
for them this morning.

- Well, maybe you forgot to
make a couple of deliveries.

You're pretty punchy,
you know, if you have

to get up earlier than 9:00.

- No, no.

I have the route book here,
the list that the boys--

- Oh, Here it is right here.

Marked off each name.

And-- yeah.

Mrs. Alfred Brown, Mrs.
George Young, Mrs. Jim Carson,

Mrs. Q. Goldschmidt,
Mrs. Margaret Brundage,

Mrs. Florence Hike,
Mrs. David Bender.

- Say, that list
sounds very familiar.

- Well, they're all people
in the neighborhood.

Mrs. Martin Cottrell,
Mrs. Anthony Schiffer,

Mrs. Gordon Adams.

- Say, what paper
do the boys work

for, "The Housewife's Journal"?

- This is a strange
subscription list.

There are no men on it.

- Well, who made the list out?

- David, I guess.

Wait a minute.

This is in Harriet's
handwriting.

- That sounds like the list
Catherine was working on to.

It-- well, sure.

That's the list of
women who are opposed

to building the new public
playground a swimming

pool over on Hudson Avenue.

- Say, that's right.

Harriet did mention
something about it.

Holy smokes, Thorny.

I used this list instead of the
list of the boy's subscribers.

No wonder Harriet's
out delivering papers.

- Oz, the more I'm
around you, the more

I realize how lucky Catherine
is she's married to me.

- Hey, after all, Thorny,
it's a little difficult

to get your mind
functioning properly

at 5:00 in the morning.
- Yeah, yeah.

I know.
Wait a minute.

I think I hear Harriet coming.

Well, I guess I'll
be running along, Oz.

- I did my best.

- Oz, I know you did.

And on my way out, I'll
put in a good word for you.

See you later.

- Oh, hi, Thorny.
- Hello, Harriet.

Hi, boys.
- Hi, Mr. Thornberry.

- Harriet, that husband of
yours really bungled up the job,

and I wouldn't spare
him if I were you.

- Hello, dear.
- Oh.

Hi, Harriet.

- I see you finally woke up.

- Yeah, I think it'd been a lot
better if I'd stayed in bed.

Gee, I'm awfully sorry.

I wanna apologize
to you and the boys.

- Sorry about what, dear?

- Well, oh, if you haven't
found out about it yet,

I'm sure not gonna tell you.

- Well, we found out one
thing, you're certainly

a very clever fellow, dear.

- Yeah, I'll say.

- You're pretty smart, Pop.

- Oh, well, thank you very much.

What have I done?

- Oh, as if you didn't know.

Why, delivering the
papers to those women

was a stroke of genius.

After reading that
editorial, they all

decided I was absolutely right
about the new playground.

Every one of them is
going to vote for it.

- Oh, gee, that's swell!

- Not only that,
most of them are

gonna subscribe to the paper.

- We got 15 new customers.

- How did you ever
think of that, Pop?

- Oh, well, you
heard your mother.

I'm a very clever fellow.

[MUSIC PLAYING - "THE CHRISTMAS
SONG"]

- [SINGING] Chestnuts
roasting on an open fire.

Jack Frost nipping at your nose.

Yuletide carols being
sung by a choir,

and folks dressed
up like Eskimos.

Everybody knows a turkey
and some mistletoe

help to make the season bright.

Tiny tots with their
eyes all aglow will

find it hard to sleep Tonight

They know that
Santa's on his way.

He's loaded lots of toys
and goodies on his sleigh.

And every mother's
child is gonna

spy to see if reindeer
really know how to fly.

And so I'm offering this simple
phrase to kids from 1 to 92.

Although it's been
said many times,

many ways, Merry
Christmas to you.

[credits song]