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1
00:00:04,810 --> 00:00:06,020
[engines revving]
2
00:00:06,020 --> 00:00:07,520
[chester arborday]
it's the final lap
3
00:00:07,520 --> 00:00:09,570
Of the springfield
little grand prix,
4
00:00:09,570 --> 00:00:11,900
And the karts are tighter
than a royal corgi's collar
5
00:00:11,900 --> 00:00:14,530
As they head into lard lad turn.
6
00:00:17,580 --> 00:00:19,240
We have contact! Things
are looking bloody grim
7
00:00:19,240 --> 00:00:23,790
For the rising star
of kf-1-- kids formula one--
8
00:00:23,790 --> 00:00:25,620
Lisa simpson.
9
00:00:25,630 --> 00:00:27,540
Simpson spins out!
10
00:00:27,540 --> 00:00:28,540
[all gasp]
11
00:00:31,760 --> 00:00:33,720
[arborday]
look at that icy calm.
12
00:00:33,720 --> 00:00:34,920
Clearly, this pre-tween dynamo
13
00:00:34,930 --> 00:00:38,010
Has never felt
a modicum of unease
14
00:00:38,010 --> 00:00:41,260
In any automobile.
15
00:00:41,270 --> 00:00:42,810
Dad!
16
00:00:42,810 --> 00:00:44,680
You're gonna hit the median.
17
00:00:44,690 --> 00:00:46,640
All part of the plan.
18
00:00:46,650 --> 00:00:47,650
[lisa exclaiming]
19
00:00:47,650 --> 00:00:48,440
[grunts]
20
00:00:48,440 --> 00:00:52,280
[whimpering]
21
00:00:52,280 --> 00:00:54,110
Aah!
22
00:00:54,110 --> 00:00:56,780
Bart, soccer practice.
Go, go, go!
23
00:00:56,780 --> 00:00:57,450
Whoa!
24
00:00:57,450 --> 00:01:00,030
Goal...!
25
00:01:01,040 --> 00:01:05,290
Dad, please, you don't
have to hurry like this.
26
00:01:06,330 --> 00:01:08,370
Cut me off? I cut you off!
27
00:01:08,380 --> 00:01:12,210
[lisa] he didn't cut you off,
he's just driving!
28
00:01:12,210 --> 00:01:13,840
Hope you like brakes
because today
29
00:01:13,840 --> 00:01:17,680
It's all-you-can-eat, baby.
30
00:01:17,680 --> 00:01:19,840
[lisa exclaims]
31
00:01:19,850 --> 00:01:21,810
Dad, stop...
32
00:01:21,810 --> 00:01:23,520
Brake checking...
33
00:01:23,520 --> 00:01:25,060
Him.
34
00:01:25,060 --> 00:01:26,480
-[groans]
-speed bump, sweetie.
35
00:01:26,480 --> 00:01:27,640
We're gonna get a little air.
36
00:01:28,650 --> 00:01:30,150
[squeals]
37
00:01:31,730 --> 00:01:35,280
Ugh.
I hate when we're early.
38
00:01:35,280 --> 00:01:37,530
Mr. And mrs. Simpson,
as you know,
39
00:01:37,530 --> 00:01:39,240
Lisa has been feeling
a lack of control,
40
00:01:39,240 --> 00:01:41,990
Which feeds
her generalized anxiety.
41
00:01:41,990 --> 00:01:44,700
I know, I know.
It's getting worse.
42
00:01:44,700 --> 00:01:46,250
Her twitch jumped eyes.
43
00:01:46,250 --> 00:01:49,540
She used to be a righty.
Where will it jump next?
44
00:01:49,540 --> 00:01:51,000
Mm...
45
00:01:51,000 --> 00:01:53,960
Mom, do you have to do that now?
46
00:01:53,960 --> 00:01:55,880
I knit when I'm worried.
47
00:01:55,880 --> 00:01:58,880
Marge is
our family designated worrier,
48
00:01:58,890 --> 00:02:01,140
Which frees me up
to be the cool dad.
49
00:02:01,140 --> 00:02:03,140
Plus, I get
some awesome worry swag.
50
00:02:04,350 --> 00:02:07,430
Marge made this when bart
swallowed a nine-volt battery
51
00:02:07,440 --> 00:02:10,100
And I had to track it
with a stud finder.
52
00:02:12,320 --> 00:02:12,980
Well... [clears throat]
53
00:02:13,150 --> 00:02:14,940
I asked you both here today
54
00:02:14,940 --> 00:02:17,940
Because lisa made
a significant breakthrough
55
00:02:17,950 --> 00:02:19,650
At her last session.
56
00:02:19,660 --> 00:02:20,860
Oh, that's wonderful.
57
00:02:20,870 --> 00:02:23,990
Doctor, I can't
thank you enough.
58
00:02:23,990 --> 00:02:26,080
This is such a relief.
59
00:02:26,080 --> 00:02:29,790
Lisa, whatever it is
that's causing your anxiety,
60
00:02:29,790 --> 00:02:32,040
We will walk through hell
to fix it.
61
00:02:32,040 --> 00:02:35,960
Well, mr. Simpson,
it's your driving.
62
00:02:35,960 --> 00:02:40,010
What did you just say to me?
63
00:02:41,850 --> 00:02:43,720
Well, dad, um, you know,
64
00:02:43,720 --> 00:02:45,810
You can be a little aggressive
behind the wheel.
65
00:02:45,810 --> 00:02:48,930
I drive at the speed of traffic.
66
00:02:48,940 --> 00:02:50,640
You can at least listen
to doctor--
67
00:02:50,650 --> 00:02:53,020
Lenny thinks I drive cool.
68
00:02:53,020 --> 00:02:54,810
Everything is always my fault.
69
00:02:54,820 --> 00:02:55,730
Well, two can play at that game.
70
00:02:55,730 --> 00:02:58,480
I say you're a terrible driver.
71
00:02:58,490 --> 00:03:01,070
I'm much faster than you.
[grunts]
72
00:03:01,070 --> 00:03:03,030
-[footsteps departing]
-[car door closes]
73
00:03:03,030 --> 00:03:04,280
-[car skids away]
-[vehicles honking]
74
00:03:04,280 --> 00:03:07,410
-Doctor, I'm so sorry about--
-[phone rings]
75
00:03:08,080 --> 00:03:10,000
You have some nerve
76
00:03:10,000 --> 00:03:12,210
Putting these thoughts
in my daughter's head.
77
00:03:12,210 --> 00:03:14,830
Mr. Simpson, can we please
continue this conversation
78
00:03:14,840 --> 00:03:16,710
When you're not driving?
79
00:03:16,710 --> 00:03:18,050
[siren wailing]
80
00:03:18,050 --> 00:03:20,670
Go around. Go around.
81
00:03:20,680 --> 00:03:23,550
Aah! [shrieking]
82
00:03:23,550 --> 00:03:25,010
[lisa and marge] aah!
83
00:03:25,010 --> 00:03:26,800
Did you flip over?
84
00:03:26,810 --> 00:03:29,060
I'm not the one on trial here.
85
00:03:29,940 --> 00:03:31,100
Your trial's in two weeks.
86
00:03:31,100 --> 00:03:34,310
Hey, doc!
Great work with ralphie.
87
00:03:34,310 --> 00:03:37,150
We can keep aluminum foil
in the house again.
88
00:03:37,150 --> 00:03:39,650
Uh, we'll pick this up later.
89
00:03:40,740 --> 00:03:41,780
[whimpers]
90
00:03:41,780 --> 00:03:44,110
Doctor, what can we do?
91
00:03:44,120 --> 00:03:46,450
Well, I have one idea.
92
00:03:47,790 --> 00:03:51,120
Here, we practice
immersion therapy.
93
00:03:51,120 --> 00:03:53,210
We expose patients
to their phobias
94
00:03:53,210 --> 00:03:56,670
So their habituated response
can decrease over time.
95
00:03:56,670 --> 00:03:57,840
[whimpering]
96
00:03:57,840 --> 00:03:59,960
[stammers] monsters.
97
00:03:59,970 --> 00:04:02,090
Monsters all. Ow!
98
00:04:02,090 --> 00:04:04,880
So, he's afraid of germs
on toilet seats.
99
00:04:04,890 --> 00:04:07,100
No, he's afraid
of rotisserie chicken.
100
00:04:07,100 --> 00:04:10,100
Lisa, if we can
use this exposure treatment
101
00:04:10,100 --> 00:04:12,020
To get you comfortable in cars,
102
00:04:12,020 --> 00:04:14,480
That might help you
overcome your other anxieties.
103
00:04:14,480 --> 00:04:17,060
Okay, I'll do whatever it takes.
104
00:04:17,070 --> 00:04:19,980
Well, I must warn you,
it won't be fun.
105
00:04:19,990 --> 00:04:22,240
[kids shouting]
106
00:04:25,120 --> 00:04:26,820
By driving a go-kart,
107
00:04:26,830 --> 00:04:28,070
You can feel
a measure of control
108
00:04:28,080 --> 00:04:29,580
In your relationship
with motor vehicles.
109
00:04:29,580 --> 00:04:31,660
I don't want to drive.
110
00:04:31,660 --> 00:04:32,620
Just put me back on the pills.
111
00:04:32,620 --> 00:04:33,710
No wait, no pills.
112
00:04:33,710 --> 00:04:35,370
They make me feel nothing.
113
00:04:35,380 --> 00:04:36,960
But my room
has never been cleaner.
114
00:04:36,960 --> 00:04:37,750
But I never laugh.
115
00:04:37,750 --> 00:04:38,920
But there's a calm in that.
116
00:04:38,920 --> 00:04:41,920
But the sound
of the grass growing is loud!
117
00:04:41,920 --> 00:04:43,920
Lisa!
It's going to be all right.
118
00:04:43,930 --> 00:04:47,680
Take a breath
and give it a little gas.
119
00:04:47,680 --> 00:04:49,600
No!
I am not doing this.
120
00:04:49,600 --> 00:04:51,350
I am putting my foot down.
121
00:04:52,520 --> 00:04:53,680
Aah! See?
122
00:04:53,690 --> 00:04:55,810
I could have killed a tire.
123
00:04:55,810 --> 00:04:58,770
[sighs]
well, we tried.
124
00:04:58,770 --> 00:05:00,060
I am out of here.
125
00:05:00,070 --> 00:05:01,860
Gonna get this
back to the starting area,
126
00:05:01,860 --> 00:05:03,820
And...
127
00:05:03,820 --> 00:05:06,700
Oh... That wasn't so bad.
128
00:05:06,700 --> 00:05:09,240
[chuckles, whoops]
129
00:05:09,240 --> 00:05:09,990
Zippy.
130
00:05:10,080 --> 00:05:12,450
We can try other approaches.
131
00:05:12,450 --> 00:05:14,540
They're making up new therapies
all the time.
132
00:05:14,540 --> 00:05:17,830
Mm. I really hoped
this one would work.
133
00:05:17,830 --> 00:05:19,880
It's working!
134
00:05:19,880 --> 00:05:21,750
I'm finally in control.
135
00:05:21,760 --> 00:05:23,550
Oh!
Doctor, you cured her.
136
00:05:23,550 --> 00:05:25,670
We don't like to use
the word "cure."
137
00:05:25,680 --> 00:05:27,750
[whooping, laughing]
138
00:05:27,750 --> 00:05:29,340
But I'm okay with "miracle."
139
00:05:29,350 --> 00:05:30,470
[whooping]
140
00:05:36,060 --> 00:05:39,310
[arborday]
johannes on schwarzvalder iii
141
00:05:39,310 --> 00:05:40,650
Cuts that turn
sharper than his mother
142
00:05:40,650 --> 00:05:41,810
Cuts the crust off
his egg and cress sandwiches.
143
00:05:43,150 --> 00:05:45,280
He might hit 30 miles an hour!
144
00:05:46,700 --> 00:05:50,660
One small slipup means
a playdate with disaster...
145
00:05:51,990 --> 00:05:54,200
...Unsupervised!
146
00:06:04,920 --> 00:06:06,920
After dominating local races,
147
00:06:06,930 --> 00:06:10,260
Lisa simpson will
make her debut in kf-1--
148
00:06:10,260 --> 00:06:13,930
The top international
go-kart circuit.
149
00:06:13,930 --> 00:06:15,810
For the first time,
race fans worldwide
150
00:06:15,810 --> 00:06:17,310
Will be able to witness
151
00:06:17,310 --> 00:06:20,650
Lisa's steely confidence
on the track.
152
00:06:20,650 --> 00:06:21,940
I can't wait to get out there.
153
00:06:21,940 --> 00:06:23,980
For me, it's not about
winning or losing,
154
00:06:23,980 --> 00:06:25,360
It's about control.
155
00:06:25,360 --> 00:06:29,030
I used to be this big bundle
of worry and anxiety,
156
00:06:29,030 --> 00:06:30,910
But on the track,
the world is going so fast,
157
00:06:30,910 --> 00:06:34,410
Yet I am in complete command.
158
00:06:34,410 --> 00:06:36,660
The stillness
at the center of power.
159
00:06:36,660 --> 00:06:38,620
I feel it everywhere.
160
00:06:38,620 --> 00:06:41,710
The other day,
I got my first a-minus ever
161
00:06:41,710 --> 00:06:43,790
On a test, no biggie.
162
00:06:43,800 --> 00:06:45,880
Uh-oh.
Am I allowed to do that?
163
00:06:45,880 --> 00:06:48,090
[weak chuckle]
will I lose more points?
164
00:06:48,090 --> 00:06:49,720
Does anyone have tape?
165
00:06:49,720 --> 00:06:52,180
Lisa is very good at her job
166
00:06:52,180 --> 00:06:55,430
Of driving around and around.
167
00:06:55,430 --> 00:06:58,640
Her unshakable demeanor
has everyone asking
168
00:06:58,640 --> 00:07:01,640
Where did this fearless phenom
come from?
169
00:07:01,650 --> 00:07:04,730
Is she the scion
of a greek shipping magnate?
170
00:07:04,730 --> 00:07:07,070
Or the scion of
a dutch shipping magnate?
171
00:07:07,070 --> 00:07:08,990
Just what nationality of magnate
172
00:07:08,990 --> 00:07:11,530
Is she the scion of?
173
00:07:11,530 --> 00:07:14,740
The truth is she's from
an obscure racing backwater
174
00:07:14,740 --> 00:07:17,870
Called-- and I hope
I'm pronouncing this correctly--
175
00:07:17,870 --> 00:07:19,540
America.
176
00:07:19,540 --> 00:07:22,790
Her mother is a housewife
with no family fortune
177
00:07:22,790 --> 00:07:24,380
Or rich dead husband.
178
00:07:24,380 --> 00:07:26,710
Her pathetic existence
peppered only
179
00:07:26,710 --> 00:07:29,420
With the mildest of victories.
180
00:07:29,420 --> 00:07:31,590
Found it.
181
00:07:31,590 --> 00:07:34,050
A life squandered.
182
00:07:34,050 --> 00:07:37,010
Lisa's father--
a bald, simpering,
183
00:07:37,020 --> 00:07:40,170
Morbidly obese
drain on society--
184
00:07:40,180 --> 00:07:43,020
Has been sentenced
to community service
185
00:07:43,020 --> 00:07:46,060
For a reckless driving
conviction.
186
00:07:46,070 --> 00:07:47,690
Am I going to look okay
in this show?
187
00:07:47,690 --> 00:07:49,900
I don't see how.
188
00:07:49,900 --> 00:07:51,440
-Oh!
-[cheering]
189
00:07:51,450 --> 00:07:53,360
D'oh!
190
00:07:53,360 --> 00:07:55,160
And despite
her dollar-store upbringing,
191
00:07:55,160 --> 00:07:59,240
Lisa simpson stands poised
for international glory
192
00:07:59,250 --> 00:08:02,460
In this fall's kf-1
karting season,
193
00:08:02,460 --> 00:08:04,710
Which coincidentally
will take place
194
00:08:04,710 --> 00:08:07,420
In her hometown of springfield.
195
00:08:07,420 --> 00:08:10,670
We are happy to welcome
these wealthy child racers
196
00:08:10,670 --> 00:08:13,380
And their smoking-hot
trophy moms.
197
00:08:13,380 --> 00:08:14,680
[man]
oh, yes!
198
00:08:14,840 --> 00:08:18,350
European racing teams have
descended upon springfield.
199
00:08:18,350 --> 00:08:20,890
And as always, the crew to beat
200
00:08:20,890 --> 00:08:24,140
Is Italy's team dooshé.
201
00:08:24,150 --> 00:08:27,310
Their charismatic star
is paolo paoletti--
202
00:08:27,320 --> 00:08:31,530
Son of tracksuit mogul
fila fendi paoletti--
203
00:08:31,530 --> 00:08:35,660
In the number seven children's
strength tylenol kart.
204
00:08:35,660 --> 00:08:37,780
[italian accent] america is such
205
00:08:37,780 --> 00:08:40,790
A wonderfully
disgusting country.
206
00:08:40,790 --> 00:08:43,910
All the guns
and the billhillies,
207
00:08:43,920 --> 00:08:46,670
And all of the television shows
about chicago.
208
00:08:46,670 --> 00:08:50,040
The fire, the police,
209
00:08:50,050 --> 00:08:54,130
The man bear who makes
the beef sandwich.
210
00:08:54,130 --> 00:08:57,300
Oh, paolo love. Boof.
211
00:08:57,300 --> 00:09:00,010
In a setback to
their jet-setting lifestyles,
212
00:09:00,010 --> 00:09:02,850
Paolo and the other
european go-karters
213
00:09:02,850 --> 00:09:04,230
Must attend public school
214
00:09:04,350 --> 00:09:09,480
Under the watchful eye of
broken, faceless bureaucrats.
215
00:09:09,480 --> 00:09:10,980
I have a face.
216
00:09:10,980 --> 00:09:12,730
Even though these kids
are impossibly wealthy,
217
00:09:12,740 --> 00:09:13,990
I think they'll fit right in.
218
00:09:13,990 --> 00:09:16,570
-They didn't.
-How do you know?
219
00:09:16,570 --> 00:09:17,610
It hasn't happened yet.
220
00:09:17,620 --> 00:09:18,990
But then it did.
221
00:09:18,990 --> 00:09:22,910
Hey, I asked
for vitello alla caper.
222
00:09:22,910 --> 00:09:25,450
What is this?
223
00:09:25,460 --> 00:09:27,160
Beanie weenies.
224
00:09:27,170 --> 00:09:30,290
Why do you hate my mouth?
225
00:09:30,300 --> 00:09:30,750
Huh?
226
00:09:30,750 --> 00:09:34,760
Why? [cries]
227
00:09:34,760 --> 00:09:37,130
[bart]
look at that sad foreign kid.
228
00:09:37,140 --> 00:09:41,010
He just needs a regular american
to reach out
229
00:09:41,010 --> 00:09:43,010
And take advantage of him.
230
00:09:43,020 --> 00:09:43,760
Is there some problem here?
231
00:09:43,770 --> 00:09:46,640
This rectangle lady
232
00:09:46,640 --> 00:09:48,980
Is trying to poison paolo.
233
00:09:48,980 --> 00:09:50,770
Dry your eyes, pinocchio.
234
00:09:50,770 --> 00:09:52,900
I'm the guy that can make stuff
happen around here.
235
00:09:52,900 --> 00:09:56,070
If just might cost you a little.
236
00:09:56,070 --> 00:09:57,110
Whatever it takes.
237
00:09:57,110 --> 00:09:58,240
I give you one of each color.
238
00:09:58,240 --> 00:10:01,410
Purple, blue, green,
purple again.
239
00:10:02,580 --> 00:10:03,870
Mmm!
240
00:10:03,870 --> 00:10:06,000
Delizioso.
241
00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:10,170
Finally, somebody around here
with no accent.
242
00:10:10,170 --> 00:10:12,790
Mwah. Bartolomeo,
you make paolo so happy.
243
00:10:12,800 --> 00:10:16,880
[sighs] you are team dooshé now.
244
00:10:16,880 --> 00:10:20,010
I'm make it rain on you.
245
00:10:20,010 --> 00:10:21,680
Boof, boof, boof, boof!
246
00:10:22,970 --> 00:10:24,060
[announcer]
gentlekids,
247
00:10:24,060 --> 00:10:26,970
Start your two-stroke engines.
248
00:10:26,980 --> 00:10:28,140
I can't believe it,
249
00:10:28,140 --> 00:10:31,650
My girl's first international
go-kart race.
250
00:10:31,650 --> 00:10:33,690
Did you put on sunblock?
251
00:10:33,690 --> 00:10:34,980
I'm in a fireproof suit.
252
00:10:34,980 --> 00:10:36,400
Oh, your father's here.
253
00:10:36,400 --> 00:10:39,110
He's finished
with his community service.
254
00:10:39,110 --> 00:10:41,320
He can finally watch me race.
255
00:10:41,320 --> 00:10:44,030
I wouldn't miss seeing
my little danica patrick
256
00:10:44,040 --> 00:10:46,120
For all the jolly ranchers
in the piñata.
257
00:10:46,120 --> 00:10:50,250
[chuckles]
the kids never check the legs.
258
00:10:54,500 --> 00:10:57,050
Now, honey,
I know they're going fast,
259
00:10:57,050 --> 00:10:59,720
But I'm sure lisa's safe.
260
00:10:59,720 --> 00:11:02,090
There's nothing to worry about.
261
00:11:02,100 --> 00:11:03,300
Oh, I'm not worried.
262
00:11:03,300 --> 00:11:05,920
Come on, you got to be
a little worried.
263
00:11:05,920 --> 00:11:08,810
Nope. I've seen lisa race
a dozen times.
264
00:11:08,810 --> 00:11:11,350
She's really good
and she's safe.
265
00:11:11,350 --> 00:11:13,310
But-but you're the family's
designated worrier.
266
00:11:13,310 --> 00:11:16,320
If you're not worried, that
means there's a worry vacuum
267
00:11:16,320 --> 00:11:20,240
That I have to fill,
and vacuuming is also your job.
268
00:11:22,620 --> 00:11:24,740
Oh, my god,
look how fast she's going.
269
00:11:24,740 --> 00:11:26,950
I'm not concerned in the least.
270
00:11:26,950 --> 00:11:28,700
And me am concerned in the most.
271
00:11:28,710 --> 00:11:31,160
I need the stress yarn.
272
00:11:31,170 --> 00:11:33,290
Relax, homie, she's winning.
273
00:11:33,290 --> 00:11:36,170
Which means she's going faster
than everybody else.
274
00:11:36,170 --> 00:11:37,040
What am I even knitting?
275
00:11:37,050 --> 00:11:39,670
Oh, it's golf club covers.
276
00:11:44,350 --> 00:11:47,300
[whooping]
277
00:11:47,310 --> 00:11:48,640
Boof!
278
00:11:50,140 --> 00:11:52,980
Time for your bedtime
sweet dream routine.
279
00:11:53,980 --> 00:11:57,150
Here's your
night terror teddies,
280
00:11:57,150 --> 00:12:00,690
And I'll set the night-light
to boogeyman banisher.
281
00:12:01,740 --> 00:12:02,950
[lisa giggles]
282
00:12:02,950 --> 00:12:04,990
Dad, I don't need all that.
283
00:12:04,990 --> 00:12:06,910
I don't have anxiety anymore.
284
00:12:06,910 --> 00:12:10,620
-And I have you to thank for it.
-Me?
285
00:12:10,620 --> 00:12:12,750
Yes.
Your unhinged driving
286
00:12:12,750 --> 00:12:15,580
Made me face my fears
and get into go-kart racing.
287
00:12:15,590 --> 00:12:18,590
This is on you.
288
00:12:18,590 --> 00:12:20,840
[whimpers]
289
00:12:20,840 --> 00:12:23,220
All my fault.
All on me.
290
00:12:24,760 --> 00:12:28,260
It's me, lisa mario.
291
00:12:33,770 --> 00:12:37,060
Woo-hoo! Thanks to my papa,
292
00:12:37,060 --> 00:12:39,020
I'm-a risking my life.
293
00:12:39,030 --> 00:12:42,400
And I'm a dream version
of milhouse.
294
00:12:43,530 --> 00:12:44,700
Aah!
295
00:12:45,990 --> 00:12:48,320
It's-a me, wario.
296
00:12:48,330 --> 00:12:51,910
My bad parenting has lead
to your doom.
297
00:12:51,910 --> 00:12:52,700
[laughs]
298
00:12:52,710 --> 00:12:55,920
Trauma bomb! Wah!
299
00:12:55,920 --> 00:12:57,540
Aah!
300
00:12:57,540 --> 00:13:00,500
It's-a me, wario!
It's all my fault! Wah!
301
00:13:01,880 --> 00:13:05,050
So, paolo, you liking this vibe?
302
00:13:05,050 --> 00:13:06,760
Not enough bass?
Too much bass?
303
00:13:06,760 --> 00:13:09,470
Less bass is gonna cost.
304
00:13:12,770 --> 00:13:14,980
Ketchup bottle service.
305
00:13:14,980 --> 00:13:17,020
You make it just like milan,
306
00:13:17,020 --> 00:13:19,690
Except here everyone
is fat and ugly.
307
00:13:19,690 --> 00:13:20,650
Bartolucci, I love you.
308
00:13:20,650 --> 00:13:22,980
Here is money.
309
00:13:22,990 --> 00:13:25,900
Excuse me, signor spaghetti,
310
00:13:25,910 --> 00:13:27,400
There's somebody at the door.
311
00:13:27,410 --> 00:13:29,780
He's not on the list and
he claims to be the principal.
312
00:13:29,780 --> 00:13:31,160
I am the principal.
313
00:13:31,160 --> 00:13:34,620
Bart simpson,
I need to see you in my office,
314
00:13:34,620 --> 00:13:35,910
Which this is.
315
00:13:35,920 --> 00:13:38,870
Bartissimo,
this polyester tie man--
316
00:13:38,880 --> 00:13:40,540
He make-a me sad.
317
00:13:40,550 --> 00:13:42,380
Leave this to me.
318
00:13:42,380 --> 00:13:44,880
Seymour, why don't you
take the afternoon off?
319
00:13:44,880 --> 00:13:47,840
Here, get your mother's
tires rotated.
320
00:13:47,840 --> 00:13:50,300
That better not be a euphemism,
young man.
321
00:13:50,300 --> 00:13:52,180
Principal skinner,
I need some help
322
00:13:52,180 --> 00:13:54,850
With the obituary
for the class hamster.
323
00:13:54,850 --> 00:13:57,640
Is the correct wording
"died by suicide"
324
00:13:57,650 --> 00:13:58,810
Or "of suicide"?
325
00:13:58,810 --> 00:13:59,980
[grumbles]
326
00:13:59,980 --> 00:14:02,770
Oh, look, everyone,
it's my archrival.
327
00:14:02,780 --> 00:14:06,190
Oh, enjoy your one win.
328
00:14:06,200 --> 00:14:07,990
You are only a flash in the pan.
329
00:14:07,990 --> 00:14:11,030
I am the breaded veal
in the pan.
330
00:14:11,030 --> 00:14:13,950
Paolo will be atop
the podium again.
331
00:14:13,950 --> 00:14:17,620
I'm sure you will.
You're a terrific driver.
332
00:14:18,750 --> 00:14:20,250
Oh! See how she mocks me?
333
00:14:20,250 --> 00:14:22,630
Bart, I hate her
and her whole family.
334
00:14:22,630 --> 00:14:26,130
Say cruel things about this girl
so I may agree with them.
335
00:14:26,130 --> 00:14:29,510
Well, I've never met her before,
but I can tell by her vibe
336
00:14:29,510 --> 00:14:32,260
That she's an animal-kissing,
wikipedia-editing middle child
337
00:14:32,260 --> 00:14:34,350
Who burps broccoli
and farts tofu
338
00:14:34,350 --> 00:14:36,520
And won't do
her brother's homework,
339
00:14:36,520 --> 00:14:37,640
Even for euros.
340
00:14:39,190 --> 00:14:42,730
And yet this girl
you have no connection to--
341
00:14:42,730 --> 00:14:43,860
She beats me.
342
00:14:43,860 --> 00:14:45,860
My thumb is raw
343
00:14:45,860 --> 00:14:47,440
From all of the doing-a this.
344
00:14:47,450 --> 00:14:49,110
[grunts]
345
00:14:50,870 --> 00:14:52,620
That's a boof.
346
00:14:52,620 --> 00:14:53,950
[car horn honks]
347
00:14:53,950 --> 00:14:55,580
Coming, mom.
348
00:14:56,500 --> 00:14:57,750
I can't let you go.
349
00:14:57,750 --> 00:14:59,580
Racing is too dangerous.
350
00:14:59,580 --> 00:15:01,250
Dad, it's fine.
351
00:15:01,250 --> 00:15:03,380
But I had a dream last night
that I was wario
352
00:15:03,380 --> 00:15:05,880
And I bombed you off
of rainbow road into oblivion.
353
00:15:05,880 --> 00:15:08,130
I'm not in danger
just because you dreamed
354
00:15:08,130 --> 00:15:12,470
A bunch of crazy stuff
from mario kart.
355
00:15:12,470 --> 00:15:13,760
What's mario kart?
356
00:15:13,760 --> 00:15:16,350
I am going to the race.
357
00:15:16,350 --> 00:15:18,350
It's my job to keep you safe.
358
00:15:18,350 --> 00:15:21,980
You never cared about that when
you were driving like a maniac.
359
00:15:21,980 --> 00:15:24,520
Well, through some miracle
of therapy,
360
00:15:24,520 --> 00:15:27,440
I'm in the driver's seat now,
and I'm enjoying myself,
361
00:15:27,440 --> 00:15:30,740
And that's when you choose
to care about my safety?!
362
00:15:30,740 --> 00:15:33,110
You summed up things perfectly.
363
00:15:33,120 --> 00:15:34,740
So you'll stay home?
364
00:15:34,740 --> 00:15:37,240
No.
I'm in control.
365
00:15:39,080 --> 00:15:43,250
Marge, stop her.
I've never been more worried.
366
00:15:43,250 --> 00:15:44,830
Well, I've never been
more relaxed.
367
00:15:44,840 --> 00:15:47,040
Hey, mom, can I drive?
368
00:15:47,050 --> 00:15:48,210
Sure, give it a shot.
369
00:15:48,920 --> 00:15:50,380
No!
370
00:15:56,180 --> 00:15:57,970
-[arborday] today,
371
00:15:57,970 --> 00:15:59,390
The kf-1 karting season
372
00:15:59,390 --> 00:16:02,600
Culminates in a two-mile loop
through springfield.
373
00:16:02,600 --> 00:16:04,480
A sad ruin, once home
374
00:16:04,480 --> 00:16:08,270
To a thriving nipple tassel
manufacturing industry.
375
00:16:08,280 --> 00:16:11,110
Stupid dad,
worried about my safety.
376
00:16:11,110 --> 00:16:14,070
Remember the time he forgot me
at a renaissance fair?
377
00:16:14,070 --> 00:16:16,240
I had to get a ride home
from the turkey leg wench.
378
00:16:16,240 --> 00:16:19,870
Oh, honey, your dad's not used
to being the one who's nervous.
379
00:16:19,870 --> 00:16:22,620
He just wants what's best
for himself.
380
00:16:22,620 --> 00:16:24,160
Thanks for flying out, bippe.
381
00:16:24,170 --> 00:16:25,750
[italian accent]
I know paolo cannot race
382
00:16:25,750 --> 00:16:27,420
Without his secret weapon.
383
00:16:27,420 --> 00:16:28,000
Andiamo!
384
00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:31,170
[tools whirring]
385
00:16:34,890 --> 00:16:37,510
Aw, bart.
386
00:16:37,510 --> 00:16:40,720
You remember that
paolo likes gelato
387
00:16:40,730 --> 00:16:43,230
After I told you over and over
388
00:16:43,230 --> 00:16:45,020
That I like gelato.
389
00:16:45,020 --> 00:16:48,110
You are my fratello
390
00:16:48,110 --> 00:16:49,400
From another mamma mia.
391
00:16:49,400 --> 00:16:53,320
Oh, you must be bart's
new italian friend.
392
00:16:53,320 --> 00:16:54,490
Well, good luck in the race.
393
00:16:54,490 --> 00:16:57,990
You're gonna need it
to beat bart's sister.
394
00:16:57,990 --> 00:16:59,410
[gasps]
395
00:16:59,410 --> 00:17:01,120
Bart simpson,
396
00:17:01,120 --> 00:17:03,120
You are the brother
397
00:17:03,120 --> 00:17:04,370
Of lisa simpson?
398
00:17:04,370 --> 00:17:08,000
Um, uh, well,
um, only by blood.
399
00:17:08,000 --> 00:17:10,090
Traditore!
400
00:17:10,090 --> 00:17:11,590
No, no.
[speaking italian]
401
00:17:14,590 --> 00:17:16,130
[speaks italian]
402
00:17:21,520 --> 00:17:23,640
[overlapping argument
in italian]
403
00:17:36,450 --> 00:17:39,070
Monday, Tuesday,
Thursday, Wednesday!
404
00:17:39,950 --> 00:17:43,040
Mwah.
Bart, you break-a my heart,
405
00:17:43,040 --> 00:17:44,370
Like snap-a the breadstick.
406
00:17:44,370 --> 00:17:46,120
Boof.
407
00:17:48,790 --> 00:17:49,710
Aah! [grunts]
408
00:17:50,880 --> 00:17:52,840
You're not watching the race?
409
00:17:52,840 --> 00:17:56,550
I'm too worried about lisa.
My only daughter...
410
00:17:56,550 --> 00:17:57,840
Uh, there's maggie.
411
00:17:57,840 --> 00:18:00,470
...Is rocketing around
on a flaming death-mobile!
412
00:18:00,470 --> 00:18:03,430
Why does no one else
care about lisa's safety?
413
00:18:03,430 --> 00:18:04,970
She's fine. See?
414
00:18:04,980 --> 00:18:05,720
[arborday]
from the pole position,
415
00:18:05,730 --> 00:18:07,560
Lisa simpson immediately
416
00:18:07,560 --> 00:18:09,140
Takes the initiative.
417
00:18:09,150 --> 00:18:10,350
What's initiative?
418
00:18:10,360 --> 00:18:12,610
Why does she have it?
Is it safe?
419
00:18:12,610 --> 00:18:13,860
[phone dings]
420
00:18:13,860 --> 00:18:15,280
Stupid team dooshé.
421
00:18:15,280 --> 00:18:16,110
Those euro jerks
forgot to remove me
422
00:18:16,110 --> 00:18:18,610
From their text thread.
423
00:18:19,950 --> 00:18:20,990
"sabotaggio"?
424
00:18:20,990 --> 00:18:23,030
Sabotaggio?
425
00:18:23,040 --> 00:18:25,490
Ooh, is that some kind of
delicious spiced ham?
426
00:18:25,500 --> 00:18:27,250
It means they sabotaged
lisa's kart!
427
00:18:27,250 --> 00:18:30,080
Oh, god, I knew
she was in danger.
428
00:18:30,080 --> 00:18:32,000
My overreacting is now just...
429
00:18:32,000 --> 00:18:34,340
[gasps] reacting.
430
00:18:34,340 --> 00:18:36,960
[arborday]
it's the final lap of the
springfield little grand prix,
431
00:18:36,970 --> 00:18:39,170
And the karts are tighter
than a royal corgi's collar
432
00:18:39,180 --> 00:18:42,260
As they head into lard lad turn.
433
00:18:42,260 --> 00:18:44,300
Perfecto, team dooshé.
434
00:18:44,310 --> 00:18:47,310
You loosened all the bolts
on lisa's kart. Boof!
435
00:18:50,270 --> 00:18:52,690
[arborday]
we have contact!
436
00:18:54,650 --> 00:18:58,070
In the storm,
I am the calm at the center.
437
00:19:00,360 --> 00:19:03,870
Why is her wheel
not-a falling off?
438
00:19:03,870 --> 00:19:05,990
Aah!
439
00:19:07,910 --> 00:19:09,250
Sabotaggio.
440
00:19:09,250 --> 00:19:11,960
Okay, missing a wheel,
no brakes,
441
00:19:11,960 --> 00:19:14,840
Still in control.
442
00:19:14,840 --> 00:19:17,090
Okay, now I'm not in control,
443
00:19:17,090 --> 00:19:18,800
But still calm.
444
00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:21,840
Wow, I have a great therapist.
445
00:19:21,840 --> 00:19:23,510
She's gonna die!
446
00:19:27,390 --> 00:19:28,850
Marge, I learned my lesson.
I was right.
447
00:19:28,850 --> 00:19:31,310
Lisa's not safe.
448
00:19:32,060 --> 00:19:34,020
Aah!
Sabotaggio!
449
00:19:40,200 --> 00:19:43,410
-Dad!
-Don't worry, sweetie.
450
00:19:43,410 --> 00:19:44,450
I'm gonna get you
out of this mess
451
00:19:44,450 --> 00:19:46,240
The way I got you
into this mess:
452
00:19:46,240 --> 00:19:49,450
By driving like a maniac!
453
00:19:51,960 --> 00:19:53,620
Stay behind me.
454
00:19:55,540 --> 00:19:57,380
Aw, you're brake checking me.
455
00:19:57,380 --> 00:20:01,720
But now I'm brake checking
with love.
456
00:20:04,600 --> 00:20:06,180
Oh! I-a lose.
457
00:20:06,180 --> 00:20:09,720
This sport is stupid-o.
458
00:20:09,730 --> 00:20:12,140
And now I fade away to ibiza
459
00:20:12,140 --> 00:20:15,980
To a quiet life as a beach dj.
460
00:20:15,980 --> 00:20:18,070
Boof.
461
00:20:20,360 --> 00:20:23,950
Dad, thank you.
You've made me feel safe.
462
00:20:23,950 --> 00:20:26,740
And I always will.
463
00:20:40,550 --> 00:20:41,340
Captioning sponsored by
20th century fox television
464
00:20:41,420 --> 00:20:43,920
And fox broadcasting company
465
00:20:43,930 --> 00:20:45,470
And toyota.
466
00:20:45,470 --> 00:20:47,140
Captioned by
media access group at wgbh
access.Wgbh.Org
467
00:21:30,350 --> 00:21:31,350
Shh.
32573
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