All language subtitles for Abbott.Elementary.S03E06.1080p.DSNP.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.H.264-FLUX

Okay.
Thank you, Melanie,

for showing us the inside
of your eyelids again.

Okay. Khalil, come on.
You're up.

What you got?

For Show-and-Tell, I brought
a famous person I saw outside.

Come on in.

Hi, I'm Bradley Cooper.
What?

Y-You are Bradley Cooper.
Why are you Bradley Cooper?

And why are you here?

Uh, well,
whenever I'm in Philly,

you know the deli
across the street?

Uh, that's my first stop. My dad
used to always take me there.

They have the best hoagies
in the city.

Everybody wanted to take
a picture with him,

so I figured
he was famous.
Yeah, you bet he is.

I'm just texting the other
teachers, not paps.
That's okay.

Anyway, so when my friend here
asked me to come by,

I had a minute,
so I thought, "What the heck?"

If you're famous,
are you in "Spider-Man"?

I'm not in "Spider-Man,"

but I am in "Guardians
of the Galaxy."

No, you're not!

Are you frickin' kiddin' me?

I'm the voice
of Rocket Raccoon!

And the face
of "Alias."

Not the face of.
Yeah, you were the face.

A-And "He's Just
Not That Into You."

Well, Janine,
that was rude.

No, I-I mean
"He's Just Not That Into You"

is my favorite
Bradley Cooper film.

It's more
of an ensemble,

but if you think
about it,

it's Justin Long's movie.

You crazy, Bradley.

Oh, I've been a Cooper Trooper
since "Wet Hot American Summer."

Well, you look different
in person.

You don't look famous.

Yeah. Shouldn't your teeth
be whiter?

They should,

but I can't whiten them
because they're too sensitive.

Oh.
I just loved you
in "The Holdovers."

It was just
so heartwarming.

It's "The Hangover,"
and, no, it's not.

Guys, he's literally
in a critically acclaimed film

right now.
"Oppenheimer."

Is that the one
about Napoleon?

Yes.
I don't think so.
I'm not in "Oppenheimer."

Are you sure? Everybody
was in "Oppenheimer."

Yeah.

Why are there cameras here?

It's a long story, Brad.
Bradley.

Um, but, hey,
since we have you--

Okay, I-I do you have to
get that hoagie, so, um...

but this-- this was
so much fun,

and does Khalil
get an "A"?

Oh, hell yeah,
he does.

Um, can you stay and take
just one picture before you go?

Yeah, of course.
Okay. Thank you.

Let's do it. Ooh!
Get in, get in, get in.

Hey.
This is so exciting.

I can't wait to tell
everyone at the district.

Oh, you work
at the school district?
Yeah.

Oh, you know that these schools
are criminally underfunded?

It's proven every--
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah. I'm working on it.

Let's just take the picture.
Okay.

Look, guys, I don't know.

She just said she's "dropping
by with a special surprise."

Wait, who's coming?
Janine?

It's not too late to leave,
y'all.

She can't annoy us if
we're not here.

Hello! Hi, everyone!
Sorry we're late.

But do notice that we are a we,
which is exciting.

Please meet Joan
from the city.

And you'll remember
Elizabeth Washington

from the Education Board.

Okay, what's up?
'Cause last time she was here,

I had to eulogize Gregory at
the Educator of the Year thing.

There's my star.

Hey, you never sent me
thank you flowers.

This is my nightmare.

Literally, she's
my sleep paralysis demon.

Abbott Elementary
is set to be designated

as a historical landmark
in the city of Philadelphia.

We're gonna be
a historical place?

Cha-ching!

What?

It comes
with a discretionary fund

for structural upkeep.

Yeah, that's true.

My great aunt's
pastrami shop got designated

'cause Dick Clark looked
through the window once.

We've always known
how special Abbott is,

but now we're historic.

Like the "Rocky" stairs.

Not quite, as Rocky
is a fictional character.

How about we throw you
down those stairs,

and you can see how fictional
they feel?!

I think she just means like
the home of Betsy Ross.

Right? Okay.

Oh, my God, guys,

we're probably going to be
a part of walking tours.

Oh, my gosh.
Who's gonna give the tour?

Uh, okay. I'll do it.
Okay.

Abbott is certainly old,
but historic?

Willard R. Abbott himself

used this very building
as a bomb shelter.

It actually turned out
to be a false alarm.

Nevertheless,

a great man cowered
on this hallowed ground.

That's right.
We're gonna be famous.

Aah! This is so cool.

Working at the district,
we treat every school as equal.

But I always knew
Abbott was exceptional.

And now the city agrees.

Eat it, all other schools
in the district!

You'll cut that part out, right?

Attention
Abbott Elementarians...

it's your captain,
Principal Coleman, speaking.

If you're learning, stop.

Abbott Elementary,
the school that I raised,

is becoming a Philly
historical landmark.

There will be a plaque ceremony
honoring our school's

namesake,
Willard R. Abbott.

And if that sounds old
and dusty to you,

the district is also
throwing a pre-party

for us and the neighborhood.

We're partying
on the district's tab.

Oh, and there will be pizza.

You're welcome.

Just imagine how
many people are gonna be posing

with peace signs out
by the plaque.

Oh, no. People do
finger hearts now. Like that.

I have to admit,
this is impressive.

I already feel
more distinguished.

You can't even spell
"distinguished."

Barbara, Melissa.

That was your, uh,
"This is amazing look," huh?

Right?

I'm so happy
you're happy.

But?

No but.
There's a but.

I can feel a but.

Damn.
You freaky.

But...
I knew it.

...Janine, this is
just local politics.

It's got nothing
to do with our school.

Yeah.
Plus this is Philly.

I mean, you can't hock a loogie
without hitting

something historic
around here.

Oh, my God, please.

Just one parade without Barbara
clouds and Melissa meatballs.

You wish
it rained my meatballs.

And let me remind you,
you asked.

Uh, yes,
but that was before

when I thought
I would like to answer.

No one is saying
that meaningless accolades

can't be a win-win,
but...

No, it's more like
a don't care...
...don't care.

Like I said,

I am so happy
you are happy.

Yeah, we're ecstatic.
For you.

Okay, well, that's good,

because it is
objectively cool

that Abbott won't be able
to be overlooked anymore.

You know? We're finally getting
the recognition we deserve.

You can't even spell
"deserve."

There you go.

Ooh!
Hey.

"I 'heart' Willard R. Abbott"
cupcakes!
You know it.

To match my "I 'heart'
Willard R. Abbott" shirt.

I love that.
You know, I really admire

the commitment
to the middle initial,

but does anyone know
what the "R" stands for?

Uh, maybe Rashid?

No. Probably--
Probably Robert.

Hello, Abbott Elementary
and community!

My name is
Elizabeth Washington,

and I am
the Chief Education Officer.

I want to thank you all
so much for joining us

at this press opp--

...party.

Party.

And I want to welcome
my mentee

and Abbott's own
Janine Teagues

to the stage
for opening remarks.

Um, thank you.
Thank you, Elizab--

Thank you, Elizabeth,
and thank you, everyone,

for joining us
in this celebration.

We have always known how
special Abbott Elementary is,

but we are grateful that what we
know will now be set in stone.

That's a plaque pun.

Thank you, Joan.

Yeah.

And, finally, I'm gonna give
a posthumous thank you

to Abbott Elementary's namesake,
Willard R. Abbott,

who famously
crawled these very halls

in a historical manner.

Thank you.
We love you, Willard!

Hey! Yes!

Hey. H-Hey, Willard R. Abbott
was a racist.

Oh, my.
Okay. So, we can't just
shout things out

because it's fun
to shout.
It's true!

Know your history!

Okay. That's-- Easy.

I want everybody to just
calm down and take a breath...

Well, now we know
what the "R" stands for.
...and then welcome, uh,

dialoguing
and different poin--

And when you say racist,
you mean like racist racist?

One racist is racist enough,
don't you think?

I'm sorry. B.L.A.C.K.S.?
What does that even stand for?

Building Love And
Creating Kids Safety, obviously.

And don't be trying to change
the subject.

Now, Willard R. Abbott
was a city planner

and his city plan was
to uphold segregation

while red lining all
of Philadelphia.

Oh, my God.
How did I not know that?

Am I bad at history?

They have all kind of methods
for rewriting legacies.

You know, like getting
schools named after themselves.

I guess
we shouldn't be surprised

that a white man of that era
was racist.

And so none of you thought to,
like, background-check this guy?

Are you even from
Philadelphia?

Yeah, I mean, Joan,
did you know about this?

Oh, yes, absolutely.

Guess that tracks.

There are a lot of landmarks
in this city

honoring bad men.

And women.
No, wait. No.

Ever been
on Columbus Boulevard?

Literal state
of "Penn"-sylvania.

Franklin Bridge, Franklin Court,
Franklin Institute.

My uncle Franklin.

A lot of eggs
in that Franklin basket.

This is the nature
of history.

It's not all good.

I'm so mad...

at you!

Damn, why did
you have to bring this up?

Okay, w-what if we change
the school's name to...

um... blanking on people
who aren't problematic.

"Doin' Just Fine" Elementary.

We already have
100 school names and mascots

already in line
for a makeover,

and the ones that are racist
without having to Google

are priority.

And you're looking at
at least three to five years.

I'm sorry, Janine.
This is too messy. We're out.

No, wait.
My clout!

Wait, uh, what if,
uh... what if--

There's no "what if."

A stupid designation
is not gonna change anything

about this school.

We didn't have one yesterday.

We don't have one today.

But look on the bright side.

The kids got pizza!

Let's just leave it
at that.

Guys, if we give up now,
we're named after a racist

and we don't have
a plaque.

Level with me, Liz.
What can we do?

Well, I mean, the plaque
is already made, so
you're out of luck.

Unless you can find another
Willard R. Abbott of note

and say that
the school is named after him.

Janine can do that.
I can do that.

Oh, wow.

Uh, so is it not clear
I was joking?

Oh, so racism's
a laughing matter?
Mm-hmm.

Of course not.
Great.

So if my minions can find
a better Abbott,

can we have the money?

Because I've already
mentally spent it

on zip ties,
beans, and birth control,

and there's no returns
in the apocalypse.

She means, does Abbott get
the recognition it deserves?

I [sighs] I guess so.

Chop, chop!
To the library!

Yeah.

Go help her!
Damn!

What if she needs to reach
a book on the middle shelf?

Okay, well, there are definitely
more Willard R. Abbotts

than I expected.

Oh, Abbott used to have
an indoor pool.

Wait, no.

Apparently the basement flooded
in '63

and they just didn't
drain it until '71.

Oh, God.

Oh. Wow.

Look at this picture
from the district archives.

Hmm. I didn't know Abbott
had Black teachers back then.

I didn't know
Philly did.

Okay, trailblazing.
Hold on.

Did Abbott have a real-life owl
as a mascot back in the '80s?

Keep reading.

"World's most rabid owl
discovered in local school."

Yeah, that makes sense now.
Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Oh!
Ohh.

How does a book
smell bad?

I cannot wait
to get my librarian program

off the ground.

Library program?

Yeah.
Did I not tell you?

Sorry.
I've been so busy.

Okay, team,
I'm gonna go see

if I can rustle up
anything in admin.

Alright.

Look. Research? Absolutely.

But between us,
Janine and Gregory...

...they're like a handsome moth
to a cutie-patootie flame.

They've given: they will.
They've given: they won't.

Now they're giving:
two people that kissed

but decided to just be friends
for some Godforsaken reason.

So, yeah.

Figured they should
have some time alone.

So...

how has it been
at the district?

Oh, it's been great, actually.

Been learning a lot.

It's different, though.
Clean.

Isn't that a good thing?
You know, you'd think,

but I just miss
Abbott's ambience.

Our dirt has a certain...

"Janine" sais quoi.

So, your, uh--
your library program...

Mm-hmm.

...will there
be microfiche?

Of course not.

Never mind.
That would be nuts, right?

Yes, Gregory,
that would be nuts.

Yeah, I know. I know.
But that's amazing, though.

Thanks.
Look at you,

programming stuff
and taking names.

You're absurd...
and thank you.

I'm absurd?
Yes.

You're the one with a pin
that's a game of tic-tac-toe.

I like this.
Yeah, I know you do.

Guys! Guys!
I found something.

What?

Well, I found an idea,
like, in my head.

Willy!

You can't just say Willy
all willy-nilly.

What is...?
Short for Willard.

Okay. We searched for
Willard R. Abbott

and Bill Abbott,
but we didn't search for Willy.

Willy is insane,
but okay.

Oh, my God, Willy Abbott,
AKA Willard R. Abbott V.

He's a direct descendant.

Environmental philanthropist.
Seems promising.

He funds environmental
research

and he works to combat
misinformation.

He's-- He's--
He's basically a hero!

Okay.
Alright, keep looking.

Let's make sure
that he's squeaky clean.

He wrote a Medium article...
Oh, no.

...denouncing
the racist views

of his great-great-grandfather
and namesake,

Willard R. Abbott!
Hot damn!

He has a contact form
on his website.

Let's free Willy.
Let's just e-mail him, yeah?

Mm-hmm.
Yeah.

So, what are we thinking
racism-wise?

I can't tell
by his outfit.

Good find.
He's a charmer.

Thank you guys so much
for coming back

and giving us
another shot.

Well, the plaque was
very expensive, yeah.
Yep.

But, um, seems legit.
We vetted him.

At the district, "vet" means
checked for a pulse.

You know,
another pass wouldn't hurt.

Especially
with his demographic.

Ask him if he thinks
the moon is a spaceship.

You know what?
I'll handle this.

Oh.
Hey, Willy,
how you doing?

So, I wanted to ask
you a couple of questions.

Man, you guys
sure are thorough, huh?

Alright. Fill in the blank.
"Women are..."

Great leaders.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Thoughts on birds?

Real.
And majestic.

Also, go Birds!

Lifetime
season ticket order.
Yeah.
Okay.

Where were you
on January 6th?!

Hey!
Have some decorum.

Oh, my God.
I got this.

Well?

In a coma actually.

'Cause you
fell off a wall?

Medically induced.
Tricky wisdom tooth situation.

That is great.

Okay, let's get you
up on stage.
Great.

Alright.

It is time
to introduce our guest...

...good guy philanthropist
and the name on this plaque,

Willard R. Abbott V.

Thank you.
Thank you, Principal Coleman.

And you can
call me Willy.

Willard's
actually better for us.

A school as wonderful
as this

shouldn't be named after a man
like my great-great-grandfather.

I've spent my life
and career

using family money
to try

and fight environmental
prejudice and inequality,

to right the wrongs
of Abbott's past.

And I accept this honor...

with that pledge in mind.

The world is such
a beautiful place,

and we want to
keep it that way.

This planet is
in desperate need of saving.

And there is no place
for racism

from one edge of the Earth
all the way to the other.

Now, I don't claim
to know all,

but I do know that this
flat Earth is our home for now.

Excuse me, what?

Yeah. Alright.
Let's, um...

Hold on, hold on, hold on.
Let him cook.

The gravity of this situation
is undeniable,

even though gravity itself
isn't real.

Okay.

This is
all Janine's fault.

The Earth is flat?

Yes.
No, no, no. No.
The Earth is a globe.

It is round, students.

Then explain maps.

Okay, let's go.

Okay.

No, wait, wait.
No.

I'm sorry, Janine.
We were never here.

And the moon
is a spaceship!

Okay.
Told you.
Real recognize real.

You have fun?

Janine.

Don't gloat just yet, please.

I'm going to think of a way
to save this.

Just need to sulk
for a second.

I'm not here to gloat.

Yeah,
we already did that

a few minutes ago
behind your back.

Janine, we usually understand
where it is you're coming from,

even if we disagree, but
we're not really getting this.

Why are you so obsessed
with a plaque?

I just love this school
so much.

Yes. That's your
defining characteristic.

I can't be here
every day this year,

and so it's just made
it more clear, you know?

These kids, the people
in the community who went here,

we all know that this isn't
just some school.

It's special.

And I know
it was just a plaque,

but...
it was validation.

I really wanted that
for us.

Well, tell me this.

What makes Abbott special
for you?

What we teach,
what we learn...

the kids,
teachers like you two.

Exactly.
A plaque can't convey that.

Yeah. We don't have to prove
our worth to anybody out there.

Plus, somebody would've
just stolen that plaque

and melted it down
and made, like, the perfect,

lightweight meat tenderizer
with just a-- a swing...

like a dream.

I-I guess I just thought it was
a chance to do something.

What we do is we teach
these remarkable students

the best we can
with what we have.

And that is what
teachers have done here

at Abbott
since it opened.

There you go.
Now that is special enough.

Thanks, guys.

I would love to sit
in this moment with you,

but I just thought of a plan
that will fix everything,

ignoring your pleas
for me to let it rest.

I love you. Bye.

Now, I'll tell you what he
should have been nominated for

was "Failure to Launch."

I thought that was
McConaughey.

It's both of them.
That's why--

You know, you don't
have to run everywhere.

I wasn't running,
but I am excited.

Don't tell me there's
a sixth Willard.

No. Better.

I'll tell you more
when we get there.

Ooh.

I thought it was clear
we move in a pack.

To the district archives
we go!

Ooh!

I don't know why I was waiting
for random people to tell us

that Abbott is important.

I'm Janine Teagues,
damn it.

I don't wait for anything.

Except when it's polite.
That's just courtesy.

History happens every day,
even when it's overlooked,

especially
when it's overlooked

and I overlooked some,
right in front of us.

Okay.

Um, let me just...
real quick.

Oh. Mm, yeah. Okay.
Mm-hmm.

No news cameras,
no blonde women.

What's with all
the pomp and circumstance?

Over a century
and a half ago,

there were no Black teachers
in this city.

And in 1862,
Banneker Colored School

hired Philadelphia's
first Black teacher

in a public school.

He was a pioneer
named John Quincy Allen.

Soon after, another school,
our school,

hired the first group
of Black teachers in the city.

They had no idea what history
they were making at the time,

but that was for us
to find out.

And now we know.

They came here every day
through unimaginable adversity

to teach
remarkable students

while doing the very best
with what they had.

So we may not have a plaque,
but it's okay.

We don't need one,

because it's what's
on the inside that counts.

And what's on the inside
is us,

and there would be no us
without them.

That was great, Janine.
Thank you.

Yeah, that was really something, hon.

Yeah,
it's a cute picture,

but it'd be cuter
with some cash on top.

Here is 10 bucks, Ava.
Are you happy now?

Yes.

Is that so wrong?

Which one do you think
was the Jacob?

None of them.
None of them.

Yeah.

Oh

For the last time,
stop trying to take my job.

Captions by VITAC--