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1
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It won't be long now.
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She had a tremendous innings.
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At least she's comfortable.
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Yeah. There are worse ways to go.
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Well, this is it.
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You're telling me.
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You can say that again.
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- Right.
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- Right.
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Shh! I think it's happening!
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- Ohh!
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- Stand by.
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Shh.
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I think she's going.
15
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Oh, I do hope she stays.
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Tenner says she stays.
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Deal.
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I can't see anything.
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Can you lift me up a bit?
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Err!
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Oh, not this again.
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Who are you?
23
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I am the ghost
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of your great grandmother.
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We are those poor spirits who dwell on,
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compelled for reasons unknown.
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Eh, she's gone.
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- Ehh.
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- Bloody cow.
30
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- Good on her actually.
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- What's going on?
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All I can see is shoes.
33
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- You owe me 10.
34
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- Oh. No, no. Heh.
35
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If you listened to what I actually said--
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- Oh, don't you start.
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- Guys, if you please!
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Perhaps one of us should say a few words.
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Yes. I'll do it. Ahem.
40
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Bagsy her room.
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- She's only just died.
42
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- Oh, come on.
43
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- Honestly.
44
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- Ohh!
45
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I'll wait till they've
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taken her away of course.
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She was the last Button of Button House.
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The final Button died today,
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though where she goes, we cannot say.
50
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Oh, he's off again.
51
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It seems but only yesterday--
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Hey. Come on.
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Don't go without me, stupid body.
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Her life was 'twas like a play,
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but with no children of her own,
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who then will come to call this home?
57
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Well, it's bigger
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than the place we're renting.
59
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It's slightly over budget, but, uh--
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Does it have a garden?
61
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No, but the downstairs flat's
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got one you can look at, so...
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- Yeah?
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- Oh.
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Oh, sorry. One second.
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Hello? Clasey Hughes Estates.
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- Nice view of the street.
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- Yeah.
69
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"Buddy's Fish 'n' Pizza."
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Well, we do like both those things.
71
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Hmm.
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- It's rubbish, isn't it?
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- Yep.
74
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- It's so bad.
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- It's awful, and I hate it.
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- Sorry.
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- Nah. Fair enough.
78
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I wouldn't want to live here either.
79
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- Hello?
80
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Oh, hello. Is that Alison Cooper?
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- Speaking.
82
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- I'm calling about a house.
83
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We're only looking at flats.
84
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We can't afford to buy a house.
85
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No. This one's not for sale.
86
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Well, then why are you calling?
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God, I hate estate agents.
88
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Apart from the good ones like you.
89
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Yep.
90
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Sorry. I think we've
91
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gotoff on the wrong foot.
92
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I'm a solicitor
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at Worthing, Cole, and Simons,
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and I'm calling to inform you
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that you have, in fact
96
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inherited a house.
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Hello? Hello?
98
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That's you in the corner there.
99
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So she was, like, my step great auntie.
100
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There's no real term for what you are,
101
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but she sadly had no direct relatives,
102
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and so you're the only one.
103
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I feel like I'm in the headmaster's office.
104
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I--I put a pussy willow
105
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in Daniel Bellingham's ear,
106
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and he tried to get it out
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and just pushed it further in.
108
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Had to go to the doctor's.
109
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It wasn't A&E or anything.
110
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It was just... he's fine now.
111
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He's a pastry chef.
112
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These look nice. Heh.
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That's potpourri.
114
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- Was she old?
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- She was 99.
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- Ohh!
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- Ohh! So close.
118
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And there she is, Lady Heather Button.
119
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The Buttons go back a long way.
120
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Lady? Does that mean I'm a lady?
121
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OK. I know I'm a lady, but, like, a lady lady
122
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like Lady Gaga, no, no.
123
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It's not this house, is it?
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Uh, as a matter of fact, it is.
125
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Button House.
126
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- No.
127
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- Huh?
128
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Now obviously,
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it can take several years
130
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to find a buyer and close the sale.
131
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Perhaps you want to try
132
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luxury hotel chains, that sort of thing.
133
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I mean, uh, she lived on her own.
134
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- What if we keep it?
135
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- Yes. That is a great idea.
136
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The house is in a state of some disrepair.
137
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We were looking
138
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for a bit of a project anyway,
139
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and I retiled the bit behind
140
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the sink in our last flat, so, um--
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- The splash back.
142
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- What's that?
143
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I'm not sure this falls
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into the category of DIY.
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You should at least
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have a survey done before you--
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I just feel like it'll be better
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to keep it in the family.
149
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I think actually that's
150
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what she would have wanted.
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Aunt Helen.
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- Heather.
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- Heather.
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And if it can make money
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for some hotel chain,
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then why not make it work for us?
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- We--we could give up our jobs.
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- Yes.
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- We could do this full-time.
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- OK. Yes.
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Can we keep it if we want to?
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Well... it is your house.
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Sorry.
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Oh, look what the cat's dragged in.
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Down here. Yeah.
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You're warm. Getting warmer.
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Yeah. You're boiling.
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Yeah. No. Cold! Get--ohh.
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Down here! You deaf?
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I've got the ears, haven't I?
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Uh, little guy.
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- Pawn.
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- Prawn go dooka-dooka.
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- But that's--
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- Checkmate.
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Fine. Best of 20.
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- Oh, come on.
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- Oh, gnn, mmm.
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Ideally, you want it about 5...
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5 potatoes high.
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This one's gonna have mud on it,
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but you don't have to have mud on it.
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This is the tip.
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We insert the tip into the split end.
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- Split end.
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- Aha.
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Then repeat the process until you be done.
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Right. Lovely talk of the day
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from Mary today.
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I think I can safely say if we had any wicker
191
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or indeed we could touch anything,
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we could all make
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a pretty rad-looking basket.
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Maybe next week, please,
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we'd all be very interested
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to hear about the trial, the witch trial. No?
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Too soon. When you're ready.
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Ahem. So tomorrow is food club!
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- Oh, no.
200
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- When Kitty will be telling us all about
201
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- the first time she ate an egg.
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- I actually didn't like it.
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All right, Kitty.
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We'll save it for tomorrow, please.
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Give us something look forward to.
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And then on Wednesday,
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Julian has volunteered to make a speech.
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Yes, my by-election victory speech, '91.
209
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Very inspiring, very long,
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and a few smutty jokes to keep it light.
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- Oh, God. Spare me.
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- Right, that's it.
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Pat, sit down. Right, AOB?
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Any other business?
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Well,
216
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I have got something actually.
217
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Now ever since I moved rooms,
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I've been woken every night by you, Fanny,
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screaming like a mad person.
220
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Well, I don't think I do!
221
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I always thought that was an owl.
222
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An owl?
223
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Do you know what an owl sounds like?
224
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Well, no, I don't think so.
225
00:08:11,450 --> 00:08:12,850
It has got to stop!
226
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Look. This is my house,
227
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and I shall do what I like.
228
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It was mine first.
229
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No, that's the land, not the house.
230
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Well, I wish you would all hush.
231
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I cannot do my work
232
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with all this agitation.
233
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Work? You haven't done
234
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a day's work in your life or death.
235
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- He's an artist.
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- Pfft!
237
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He's ahead of his time.
238
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Oh, he can't still be ahead of his time, Kitty.
239
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Guys, please!
240
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Why don't you just go back
241
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to your old room in the east wing?
242
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I don't see why I should.
243
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I wanted the garden view.
244
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Now as ranking officer--
245
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Well, The garden view comes
246
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with the screaming woman.
247
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You get used to it after 100 years.
248
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Let's be serious here.
249
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Don't you get involved.
250
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Argh!
251
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Simple. You swap room, eh?
252
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You go up top, you come ground floor,
253
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and no jumpy.
254
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Right.
255
00:09:07,179 --> 00:09:08,679
Well, that would suit me, I think.
256
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Yeah, that could work.
257
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Not just a pretty face.
258
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Well, quite.
259
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Hmm. Yeah. Heh.
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Hup. Ahh.
261
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Ahh. Splendid.
262
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Fanny?
263
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I say, Fanny.
264
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George?
265
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Aah!
266
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Oh, for heaven's sake.
267
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Throw yourself out
268
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of your own damned window.
269
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I'm bringing sexy back
270
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- Yeah
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- Mmm
272
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Oh, oh, oh, oh, oww
273
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Being so over
274
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- Protective
275
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- Protective
276
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I always get the timing wrong on that.
277
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- Hang on, hang on, hang on.
278
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- Whoa, whoa, whoa
279
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I think this is it.
280
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Oh, my God.
281
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- My heart.
282
00:10:43,440 --> 00:10:46,270
- Yeah.
283
00:10:46,270 --> 00:10:48,309
It's so strange. I...
284
00:10:48,309 --> 00:10:51,849
I feel like I know the place already.
285
00:10:51,849 --> 00:10:55,719
This track, every tree.
286
00:10:55,719 --> 00:10:59,219
It's like I've been here my whole life,
287
00:10:59,219 --> 00:11:02,989
like it's... home.
288
00:11:02,989 --> 00:11:02,989
- This is the wrong one.
289
00:11:02,989 --> 00:11:04,650
- Yeah.
290
00:11:08,429 --> 00:11:09,760
This really is beyond the pale.
291
00:11:09,760 --> 00:11:11,200
Oh, has it happened again?
292
00:11:11,200 --> 00:11:13,539
You entered my room, you said, "George,"
293
00:11:13,539 --> 00:11:15,000
and then threw yourself out of the window.
294
00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:17,940
Well, look, I don't even realize I'm doing it.
295
00:11:17,940 --> 00:11:20,280
Perhaps there's some deeply buried reason
296
00:11:20,280 --> 00:11:22,280
why you feel like you have to reenact--
297
00:11:22,280 --> 00:11:22,280
Maybe try jumping
298
00:11:22,280 --> 00:11:24,880
out of the window before bed,
299
00:11:24,880 --> 00:11:25,880
get it out of the way.
300
00:11:25,880 --> 00:11:27,549
No, it's not so much the jumping.
301
00:11:27,549 --> 00:11:29,520
It's the screaming that's annoying.
302
00:11:29,520 --> 00:11:29,520
Yes, that's a compromise.
303
00:11:29,520 --> 00:11:33,289
Keep the jumping but do it silently.
304
00:11:33,289 --> 00:11:35,789
Staying hush whilst falling from a height?
305
00:11:35,789 --> 00:11:36,820
Tush and flops.
306
00:11:36,820 --> 00:11:40,130
Look. Perhaps I scream because...
307
00:11:40,130 --> 00:11:42,260
and I've never told anyone this, but--
308
00:11:42,260 --> 00:11:43,900
It's quite all right. We shan't pry.
309
00:11:43,900 --> 00:11:45,630
It's just that the night that I actually--
310
00:11:45,630 --> 00:11:47,539
No, look, no screaming.
311
00:11:47,539 --> 00:11:50,070
That's all I ask. Is that reasonable? Good.
312
00:11:50,070 --> 00:11:50,070
Oh! Argh! Eeh! Box.
313
00:11:50,070 --> 00:11:57,109
Move got wheel. Rrrnn rrrnn.
314
00:11:57,109 --> 00:11:57,109
- It's a motor car.
315
00:11:57,109 --> 00:11:58,440
- Car!
316
00:11:59,479 --> 00:12:02,479
Wow. It's like a blooming spaceship.
317
00:12:02,479 --> 00:12:04,250
Poor creatures must be lost.
318
00:12:05,049 --> 00:12:07,159
We're the kids in America
319
00:12:07,159 --> 00:12:08,059
Whoa, oh
320
00:12:08,059 --> 00:12:08,059
- We're in the kids in America
321
00:12:08,059 --> 00:12:09,960
- It's Kim Wilde.
322
00:12:11,190 --> 00:12:11,190
Let me pluck out my eyes,
323
00:12:11,190 --> 00:12:16,760
for never will I see such beauty again.
324
00:12:16,760 --> 00:12:19,099
Yes, he'd make a very fine soldier.
325
00:12:21,099 --> 00:12:22,229
Ahem.
326
00:12:29,479 --> 00:12:29,479
- Wow. Ha ha ha!
327
00:12:29,479 --> 00:12:33,510
- Shall we, Lady Alison?
328
00:12:38,190 --> 00:12:39,520
Ohh!
329
00:12:42,190 --> 00:12:45,890
Oh! Oh, Mike.
330
00:12:47,830 --> 00:12:47,830
This is 100% the most
331
00:12:47,830 --> 00:12:52,500
incredible moment of my life,
332
00:12:52,500 --> 00:12:54,340
apart from our wedding.
333
00:12:54,340 --> 00:12:56,200
And it's all ours.
334
00:12:56,200 --> 00:12:58,169
What did that girl just say?
335
00:12:58,169 --> 00:12:59,969
She must be related to you
336
00:12:59,969 --> 00:13:04,210
like a niece, a great, great, great--
337
00:13:04,210 --> 00:13:06,580
No, no, no, no. She's no niece of mine.
338
00:13:06,580 --> 00:13:06,580
Look at her.
339
00:13:06,580 --> 00:13:08,880
She's exposing her knees,
340
00:13:08,880 --> 00:13:10,520
and she's got a tattoo.
341
00:13:10,520 --> 00:13:12,150
So this is the library.
342
00:13:12,150 --> 00:13:12,150
Does that mean we have
343
00:13:12,150 --> 00:13:13,659
to start reading books?
344
00:13:13,659 --> 00:13:15,059
Philistine.
345
00:13:15,059 --> 00:13:15,059
It'll be nice to have
346
00:13:15,059 --> 00:13:17,130
some new faces around.
347
00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:18,590
There's enough faces already.
348
00:13:18,590 --> 00:13:20,530
We have to fix up all the plasterwork.
349
00:13:20,530 --> 00:13:20,530
- But need fix architrave.
350
00:13:20,530 --> 00:13:24,799
- Oh, yeah.
351
00:13:24,799 --> 00:13:24,799
- We could do every room in a different style.
352
00:13:24,799 --> 00:13:26,869
- Great idea.
353
00:13:26,869 --> 00:13:28,169
Over my dead body!
354
00:13:28,169 --> 00:13:28,169
- Wait.
355
00:13:28,169 --> 00:13:29,570
- I know.
356
00:13:30,609 --> 00:13:31,739
Ye olde worlde.
357
00:13:33,309 --> 00:13:34,679
1950s.
358
00:13:36,880 --> 00:13:38,309
Club Tropicana.
359
00:13:38,309 --> 00:13:39,510
That's fun.
360
00:13:40,080 --> 00:13:40,080
- Wow.
361
00:13:40,080 --> 00:13:42,049
- Unbelievable.
362
00:13:42,049 --> 00:13:42,049
Well, they seem really nice.
363
00:13:42,049 --> 00:13:45,320
Let's give them a chance.
364
00:13:45,320 --> 00:13:46,890
Look at that.
365
00:13:46,890 --> 00:13:46,890
- What is that?
366
00:13:46,890 --> 00:13:48,789
- Is that a lake?
367
00:13:48,789 --> 00:13:50,690
I hate it when that happens.
368
00:13:50,690 --> 00:13:51,590
It's a lake.
369
00:13:51,590 --> 00:13:52,890
Well, there's only two of them.
370
00:13:52,890 --> 00:13:54,659
Still plenty of room for us.
371
00:13:54,659 --> 00:13:56,799
This is going to make one incredible hotel.
372
00:14:00,200 --> 00:14:02,070
What is hotel?
373
00:14:02,070 --> 00:14:04,669
Well, Robin, a hotel is...
374
00:14:04,669 --> 00:14:04,669
- Kill them.
375
00:14:04,669 --> 00:14:06,309
- I quite agree
376
00:14:06,309 --> 00:14:06,309
if we all approve the use
377
00:14:06,309 --> 00:14:09,539
of force to enable them to,
378
00:14:09,539 --> 00:14:11,179
you know, not live anymore.
379
00:14:11,179 --> 00:14:11,179
Out of the question.
380
00:14:11,179 --> 00:14:13,650
That's completely immoral.
381
00:14:13,650 --> 00:14:13,650
And it's wrong.
382
00:14:13,650 --> 00:14:15,020
- And if we do kill them,
383
00:14:15,020 --> 00:14:16,479
we could be stuck with them forever.
384
00:14:16,479 --> 00:14:17,950
Would that so bad?
385
00:14:17,950 --> 00:14:20,090
She's married, Thomas. Look at them.
386
00:14:20,090 --> 00:14:22,859
Why must I always be spurned?
387
00:14:22,859 --> 00:14:22,859
Couldn't we all just
388
00:14:22,859 --> 00:14:24,590
live in the gatehouse?
389
00:14:24,590 --> 00:14:24,590
- I'd rather kill them.
390
00:14:24,590 --> 00:14:26,859
- Kill them.
391
00:14:26,859 --> 00:14:26,859
- Hear, hear.
392
00:14:26,859 --> 00:14:29,059
- But that's a crime.
393
00:14:29,059 --> 00:14:30,229
We'll hang.
394
00:14:32,630 --> 00:14:34,400
Damn it, Fanny!
395
00:14:34,400 --> 00:14:37,570
We could always try...
396
00:14:37,570 --> 00:14:40,070
haunting.
397
00:14:40,070 --> 00:14:41,280
We're ghosts.
398
00:14:47,950 --> 00:14:49,820
Your tea, m'lady.
399
00:14:49,820 --> 00:14:51,219
Thank you, Jeeves.
400
00:14:53,219 --> 00:14:53,219
- Taste all right?
401
00:14:53,219 --> 00:14:55,119
- Why?
402
00:14:55,119 --> 00:14:56,419
I couldn't get any water in the kitchen,
403
00:14:56,419 --> 00:14:58,289
and I couldn't find the other kitchen,
404
00:14:58,289 --> 00:14:59,659
so I ended up using the garden tap,
405
00:14:59,659 --> 00:14:59,659
and then there's no electric in the kitchen,
406
00:14:59,659 --> 00:15:03,099
so I found a plug that worked in the library.
407
00:15:03,099 --> 00:15:03,099
I don't know if the water's drinkable,
408
00:15:03,099 --> 00:15:05,630
but I boiled it twice.
409
00:15:07,000 --> 00:15:08,869
I love the sound of the country.
410
00:15:08,869 --> 00:15:11,210
It's in the room.
411
00:15:11,210 --> 00:15:11,210
Oh, yeah.
412
00:15:11,210 --> 00:15:14,280
It must be nesting somewhere.
413
00:15:14,280 --> 00:15:18,080
Right. What's first? The pipes? Electrics?
414
00:15:18,080 --> 00:15:19,750
Probably get the bird out the room.
415
00:15:19,750 --> 00:15:19,750
Yeah. Come on then.
416
00:15:19,750 --> 00:15:23,080
Pigeon, pigeon, pigeon.
417
00:15:23,080 --> 00:15:24,309
Gah! Agh!
418
00:15:24,650 --> 00:15:24,650
Now, then. Let's have a look at some
419
00:15:24,650 --> 00:15:28,159
of the skills at our disposal, shall we?
420
00:15:28,159 --> 00:15:28,159
Now, we all know that Robin
421
00:15:28,159 --> 00:15:30,929
can do that thing with the lights.
422
00:15:30,929 --> 00:15:30,929
- Will you please, Robin?
423
00:15:30,929 --> 00:15:33,630
- Oh, yeah.
424
00:15:39,599 --> 00:15:39,599
- Very good.
425
00:15:39,599 --> 00:15:40,469
- Excellent.
426
00:15:40,469 --> 00:15:41,239
Yes, Mary.
427
00:15:41,239 --> 00:15:41,239
When I pass through the livings,
428
00:15:41,239 --> 00:15:44,609
they smells burnings.
429
00:15:44,609 --> 00:15:46,539
Excellent. None of those are plural, but--
430
00:15:46,539 --> 00:15:49,239
'Tis a most noxious stinks, though.
431
00:15:49,239 --> 00:15:51,450
When I was alive...
432
00:15:51,450 --> 00:15:52,479
Oh, here he goes.
433
00:15:52,479 --> 00:15:55,719
It was rumored a little plague girl
434
00:15:55,719 --> 00:15:58,619
could oft be heard singing in the pantry.
435
00:16:00,049 --> 00:16:03,460
Ring a ring o' roses
436
00:16:03,460 --> 00:16:07,500
A pocketful of posies
437
00:16:07,500 --> 00:16:10,570
A-tishoo A-tishoo
438
00:16:10,570 --> 00:16:12,559
We all fall down
439
00:16:14,770 --> 00:16:17,070
People find it scary apparently.
440
00:16:17,070 --> 00:16:18,539
Ha ha ha!
441
00:16:18,539 --> 00:16:20,979
Can't think why. Gah.
442
00:16:20,979 --> 00:16:20,979
Ahem. Finally, we're all aware
443
00:16:20,979 --> 00:16:24,710
of Julian's extraordinary powers.
444
00:16:24,710 --> 00:16:26,280
Oh, please. No, no.
445
00:16:28,880 --> 00:16:30,280
All right, all right, all right, all right.
446
00:16:30,280 --> 00:16:30,280
All right. Just I need a little bit...
447
00:16:30,280 --> 00:16:32,789
here we go. OK. Ahem.
448
00:16:32,789 --> 00:16:34,809
Watch this. Shh, shh, shh. OK.
449
00:16:36,859 --> 00:16:38,489
Ohh. Hold on.
450
00:16:40,030 --> 00:16:41,119
Shree!
451
00:16:42,799 --> 00:16:44,130
Heh heh heh.
452
00:16:44,130 --> 00:16:46,729
Aah! Argh! Here we go.
453
00:16:46,729 --> 00:16:47,760
Unh.
454
00:16:55,539 --> 00:16:55,539
- Extraordinary!
455
00:16:55,539 --> 00:16:59,210
- I've only tried it on cups, but, you know.
456
00:16:59,210 --> 00:17:00,210
Excellent.
457
00:17:00,210 --> 00:17:03,580
Well, with my leadership and your skills, ah,
458
00:17:03,580 --> 00:17:05,449
I believe we have everything we need
459
00:17:05,449 --> 00:17:06,750
to scare them out of their wits.
460
00:17:07,859 --> 00:17:09,290
Aah!
461
00:17:09,290 --> 00:17:12,260
The water's gone cold! It's so... it's so cold!
462
00:17:12,260 --> 00:17:13,189
Mike.
463
00:17:13,189 --> 00:17:14,420
Oh, God.
464
00:17:15,829 --> 00:17:15,829
- Thomas?
465
00:17:15,829 --> 00:17:17,969
- Ohh? I wasn't looking,
466
00:17:17,969 --> 00:17:20,099
and anyway, I couldn't see anything, so...
467
00:17:20,099 --> 00:17:21,969
Right, mate. Is she coming out?
468
00:17:23,569 --> 00:17:23,569
- Yes, I think she is.
469
00:17:23,569 --> 00:17:25,699
- She's coming out!
470
00:17:27,109 --> 00:17:29,579
Stand to, everybody. Prepare for action.
471
00:17:29,579 --> 00:17:30,680
Good luck, everyone,
472
00:17:30,680 --> 00:17:30,680
and remember,
473
00:17:30,680 --> 00:17:33,410
as long as you do your best...
474
00:17:37,650 --> 00:17:37,650
- Finished?
475
00:17:37,650 --> 00:17:38,709
- Yes.
476
00:17:39,920 --> 00:17:42,160
Hot water's stopped.
477
00:17:42,160 --> 00:17:43,219
Go for Robin.
478
00:17:48,829 --> 00:17:50,729
Ohh! Aah!
479
00:17:52,000 --> 00:17:52,900
Man down.
480
00:17:52,900 --> 00:17:55,199
Right, cue Jemima.
481
00:17:55,199 --> 00:17:56,839
Ring a ring o'...
482
00:17:58,339 --> 00:18:00,439
Yes! Got the speakers hooked up.
483
00:18:00,439 --> 00:18:02,010
Well, that's the main thing.
484
00:18:02,010 --> 00:18:03,910
Yes, please, Mary.
485
00:18:03,910 --> 00:18:04,810
Unh!
486
00:18:04,810 --> 00:18:06,010
I think your toast is burning.
487
00:18:06,010 --> 00:18:07,479
Damn it!
488
00:18:07,479 --> 00:18:09,880
All on you now, Julian. Go for it, man!
489
00:18:09,880 --> 00:18:11,890
Push it! Come on! Push it!
490
00:18:11,890 --> 00:18:12,989
Aagh!
491
00:18:14,959 --> 00:18:14,959
- Ooh!
492
00:18:14,959 --> 00:18:17,060
Push it!
493
00:18:18,589 --> 00:18:20,560
Aagh!
494
00:18:21,829 --> 00:18:23,260
Ohh!
495
00:18:24,329 --> 00:18:24,329
- Ahh.
496
00:18:24,329 --> 00:18:25,869
- Damn it!
497
00:18:27,069 --> 00:18:27,069
You know, it's much
498
00:18:27,069 --> 00:18:31,040
bigger than a cup, so--ahh.
499
00:18:31,040 --> 00:18:32,770
Haunting's hard, isn't it?
500
00:18:32,770 --> 00:18:36,069
So how did it go? Guys?
501
00:18:39,010 --> 00:18:41,780
Right. Well, I think the boiler is in...
502
00:18:44,619 --> 00:18:45,680
there?
503
00:18:53,959 --> 00:18:54,949
After you.
504
00:18:59,829 --> 00:19:01,060
Oh.
505
00:19:20,550 --> 00:19:22,719
Sing something, make this less scary.
506
00:19:24,189 --> 00:19:24,189
Don't be scared,
507
00:19:24,189 --> 00:19:28,800
don't be scared
508
00:19:28,800 --> 00:19:30,329
I'm not scared
509
00:19:30,329 --> 00:19:31,530
OK. You're making it worse.
510
00:19:32,869 --> 00:19:34,199
There's another switch here.
511
00:19:39,339 --> 00:19:41,209
I can fix this.
512
00:19:41,209 --> 00:19:43,579
What? Are you joking?
513
00:19:43,579 --> 00:19:43,579
- Who are they?
514
00:19:43,579 --> 00:19:45,709
- I don't know.
515
00:19:45,709 --> 00:19:47,109
I'll look it up on YouTube.
516
00:19:47,109 --> 00:19:47,109
Mike, not everything can be learned
517
00:19:47,109 --> 00:19:49,319
from a YouTube tutorial.
518
00:19:49,319 --> 00:19:49,319
You'd be surprised.
519
00:19:49,319 --> 00:19:51,819
I found a guide on how to tame an eagle.
520
00:19:51,819 --> 00:19:51,819
Yeah, but that's not...
521
00:19:51,819 --> 00:19:54,189
what, an actual eagle?
522
00:19:54,189 --> 00:19:54,189
- Mm-hmm.
523
00:19:54,189 --> 00:19:56,319
- Why would you need to know that?
524
00:19:56,319 --> 00:19:57,890
Don't know. Cool, though.
525
00:19:57,890 --> 00:19:59,290
So cool.
526
00:19:59,290 --> 00:19:59,290
- Um.
527
00:19:59,290 --> 00:20:01,859
- Oi. Don't fiddle with that.
528
00:20:01,859 --> 00:20:01,859
- Do you even know what that does?
529
00:20:01,859 --> 00:20:05,199
- Yeah, it's a thing for the thingy bob.
530
00:20:05,199 --> 00:20:07,469
It's the valve for the filling loop.
531
00:20:09,140 --> 00:20:09,140
- Hey!
532
00:20:09,140 --> 00:20:10,709
- Whoo!
533
00:20:10,709 --> 00:20:11,569
Fixed it.
534
00:20:11,569 --> 00:20:13,739
No, you haven't. It's just the pilot light.
535
00:20:13,739 --> 00:20:14,709
Do you think we need a new one?
536
00:20:14,709 --> 00:20:16,109
What, and get rid of old Betsy?
537
00:20:16,109 --> 00:20:17,079
No, no.
538
00:20:17,079 --> 00:20:17,079
Let's see what
539
00:20:17,079 --> 00:20:19,949
the surveyor says next week. Hm?
540
00:20:19,949 --> 00:20:19,949
- OK.
541
00:20:19,949 --> 00:20:23,119
- Eeh.
542
00:20:23,119 --> 00:20:23,849
Ready?
543
00:20:23,849 --> 00:20:23,849
WOMAN What for?
544
00:20:23,849 --> 00:20:25,250
I'm ready.
545
00:20:25,250 --> 00:20:26,750
Ready.
546
00:20:28,459 --> 00:20:29,359
I wasn't ready.
547
00:20:29,359 --> 00:20:31,630
Well, that was nice, anyway.
548
00:20:31,630 --> 00:20:33,560
Yeah, come back soo...
549
00:20:33,560 --> 00:20:35,390
oh, they can't hear me, can they?
550
00:20:41,369 --> 00:20:43,170
They're not warming up down here.
551
00:20:43,170 --> 00:20:44,310
How's yours?
552
00:20:44,310 --> 00:20:45,530
Give me a sec.
553
00:20:58,420 --> 00:20:59,750
There you are.
554
00:21:02,859 --> 00:21:04,689
Hello.
555
00:21:05,760 --> 00:21:08,500
We'll be overrun with people
556
00:21:08,500 --> 00:21:10,560
taunting us with their life.
557
00:21:12,670 --> 00:21:14,939
No, we'll just try again.
558
00:21:14,939 --> 00:21:17,199
If at first you don't succeed...
559
00:21:17,199 --> 00:21:19,270
Precisely. That's right.
560
00:21:19,270 --> 00:21:21,410
We must prepare another charge.
561
00:21:21,410 --> 00:21:23,239
Hit them when they're vulnerable.
562
00:21:23,239 --> 00:21:23,239
We may have lost the battle,
563
00:21:23,239 --> 00:21:26,010
but the war is far from over.
564
00:21:36,619 --> 00:21:37,530
Aah!
565
00:21:38,260 --> 00:21:39,060
Fanny's early.
566
00:21:39,060 --> 00:21:39,060
- Uh, I'm right here.
567
00:21:39,060 --> 00:21:41,329
- What?
568
00:21:41,329 --> 00:21:44,869
Egh, ugh. It's Kim Wilde!
569
00:21:44,869 --> 00:21:48,339
Alison! Alison! Alison.
570
00:21:51,040 --> 00:21:53,170
OK. I can see... look at me. Look at me.
571
00:21:53,170 --> 00:21:53,170
Alison, can you hear me?
572
00:21:53,170 --> 00:21:56,739
Alison, I'm here.
573
00:21:56,739 --> 00:21:58,880
Can you hear me? Yeah? Stay with me.
574
00:21:58,880 --> 00:22:01,250
Keep your eyes open. Alison, I'm here.
575
00:22:15,260 --> 00:22:17,160
Let me be absolutely clear.
576
00:22:17,160 --> 00:22:18,199
Did you push her?
577
00:22:18,199 --> 00:22:18,199
Well, Now, the thing you
578
00:22:18,199 --> 00:22:19,900
have to understand is this.
579
00:22:19,900 --> 00:22:19,900
I'm sorry, but it's rather
580
00:22:19,900 --> 00:22:22,099
a yes or no question, Julian.
581
00:22:22,099 --> 00:22:23,300
Pat, pat, pat...
582
00:22:23,300 --> 00:22:25,040
I took a decision to - to--
583
00:22:25,040 --> 00:22:27,040
Pushy or no pushy?
584
00:22:27,040 --> 00:22:28,780
You know, Robin, let me ask you this.
585
00:22:28,780 --> 00:22:28,780
- You know, what was the context?
586
00:22:28,780 --> 00:22:32,250
- Answer the question, damn your eyes!
587
00:22:32,250 --> 00:22:32,250
Due respect, Thomas,
588
00:22:32,250 --> 00:22:34,780
I'm trying to answer the question
589
00:22:34,780 --> 00:22:34,780
- if you'll let me finish.
590
00:22:34,780 --> 00:22:36,650
- Now, look here.
591
00:22:36,650 --> 00:22:36,650
A sacrifice was made
592
00:22:36,650 --> 00:22:38,520
for the greater good.
593
00:22:38,520 --> 00:22:38,520
Now we wanted her
594
00:22:38,520 --> 00:22:40,250
out of the house, didn't we?
595
00:22:40,250 --> 00:22:40,250
Now this has either killed her
596
00:22:40,250 --> 00:22:42,890
or scared her off.
597
00:22:42,890 --> 00:22:46,530
You don't just do that to someone.
598
00:22:46,530 --> 00:22:46,530
What kind of coward would
599
00:22:46,530 --> 00:22:50,199
push a lady out of the window?
600
00:22:50,199 --> 00:22:50,199
- Now, steady on, Fanny.
601
00:22:50,199 --> 00:22:55,040
- No. No, I won't because I was pushed.
602
00:22:55,040 --> 00:22:55,040
You hear me? I was pushed,
603
00:22:55,040 --> 00:23:00,040
and I have never told a soul.
604
00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:02,640
It was my husband George.
605
00:23:02,640 --> 00:23:06,579
I caught him upon the groundskeeper...
606
00:23:06,579 --> 00:23:06,579
Good Lord.
607
00:23:06,579 --> 00:23:09,719
- ...with the butler on him.
608
00:23:09,719 --> 00:23:09,719
- Like a sandwich?
609
00:23:09,719 --> 00:23:11,619
- A manwich.
610
00:23:11,619 --> 00:23:13,750
It's actually known as a Moroccan tea party.
611
00:23:13,750 --> 00:23:15,060
Guys!
612
00:23:15,060 --> 00:23:15,060
Clearly, he didn't trust me
613
00:23:15,060 --> 00:23:18,089
with his sordid little secret,
614
00:23:18,089 --> 00:23:20,560
so he just did away with me,
615
00:23:20,560 --> 00:23:22,030
but he was wrong, wasn't he?
616
00:23:22,030 --> 00:23:22,030
He was very wrong.
617
00:23:22,030 --> 00:23:25,000
Because I have kept it, haven't I?
618
00:23:26,270 --> 00:23:29,400
Until now. Until now.
619
00:23:29,400 --> 00:23:32,140
I mean, I did know that. I watched all of that.
620
00:23:32,140 --> 00:23:32,140
- So did I.
621
00:23:32,140 --> 00:23:33,569
- Yeah, yeah.
622
00:23:33,569 --> 00:23:34,640
JULIAN I wish I had watched it.
623
00:23:34,640 --> 00:23:36,270
Well, Fanny...
624
00:23:38,109 --> 00:23:38,109
that must have been a terrible burden
625
00:23:38,109 --> 00:23:42,050
to bear for all those years.
626
00:23:42,050 --> 00:23:45,449
Perhaps now that you've shared it,
627
00:23:45,449 --> 00:23:47,859
you'll be free of your nightly terrors.
628
00:23:47,859 --> 00:23:50,790
Oh, do you suppose so?
629
00:23:50,790 --> 00:23:52,630
I'm sure of it.
630
00:23:52,630 --> 00:23:53,589
Ohh.
631
00:23:54,859 --> 00:23:56,699
Aah!
632
00:23:57,869 --> 00:24:00,530
Fanny!
633
00:24:00,530 --> 00:24:00,530
You see, Pat? What did I tell you?
634
00:24:00,530 --> 00:24:04,640
That's where talking gets you. Nowhere!
635
00:24:04,640 --> 00:24:06,770
It was silly of me to suggest it really.
636
00:24:06,770 --> 00:24:09,180
Lesson learnt. What shall we do?
637
00:24:09,180 --> 00:24:09,180
I don't know.
638
00:24:09,180 --> 00:24:11,079
I'm not going to spend eternity
639
00:24:11,079 --> 00:24:11,079
listening to that racket
640
00:24:11,079 --> 00:24:13,239
at the same time every night.
641
00:24:20,119 --> 00:24:20,119
- It's worth a try.
642
00:24:20,119 --> 00:24:22,160
- Ah.
643
00:24:33,030 --> 00:24:35,000
Aah!
644
00:24:36,099 --> 00:24:39,239
Ahh. Much better. Morning.
645
00:24:39,239 --> 00:24:39,239
Mornings.
646
00:24:39,239 --> 00:24:40,739
Good morning.
647
00:24:40,739 --> 00:24:42,079
Good day.
648
00:24:42,079 --> 00:24:43,239
Finally.
649
00:24:43,239 --> 00:24:44,800
Things can get back to normal around here.
650
00:25:00,890 --> 00:25:02,729
Shift over.
651
00:25:02,729 --> 00:25:05,630
Can't I lie down? I'm so tired.
652
00:25:05,630 --> 00:25:05,630
- Poor you.
653
00:25:05,630 --> 00:25:07,699
- It's all right for you.
654
00:25:07,699 --> 00:25:09,469
You've been asleep for two weeks.
655
00:25:09,469 --> 00:25:09,469
- Ohh. It's called a coma.
656
00:25:09,469 --> 00:25:12,410
- Induced coma.
657
00:25:12,410 --> 00:25:13,369
Oh.
658
00:25:15,010 --> 00:25:15,010
- You all right?
659
00:25:15,010 --> 00:25:18,010
- Yeah.
660
00:25:18,010 --> 00:25:19,310
I'm glad you didn't die.
661
00:25:20,949 --> 00:25:23,650
Well, technically, I did... for a bit.
662
00:25:26,050 --> 00:25:29,020
Did I dream that house?
663
00:25:29,020 --> 00:25:30,579
I feel like I dreamt it all.
664
00:25:32,829 --> 00:25:36,260
Oh. Have you had the survey back?
665
00:25:36,260 --> 00:25:38,829
No. No, not yet.
666
00:25:38,829 --> 00:25:39,800
Hmm.
667
00:25:43,969 --> 00:25:46,209
Now, have her face the right way.
668
00:25:46,209 --> 00:25:48,680
You want the end with the milk there,
669
00:25:48,680 --> 00:25:51,810
not the end for looking and chewing out of.
670
00:25:51,810 --> 00:25:55,180
You want to take this finger and this finger
671
00:25:55,180 --> 00:25:57,180
gently but quickly,
672
00:25:57,180 --> 00:25:59,650
and that releases a big squirt of the stuff.
673
00:25:59,650 --> 00:25:59,650
- Good Lord.
674
00:25:59,650 --> 00:26:02,020
- Chuck some of the muck out
675
00:26:02,020 --> 00:26:02,020
so you can check then
676
00:26:02,020 --> 00:26:04,020
if the milk be smooth and white,
677
00:26:04,020 --> 00:26:05,390
not beige and lumpy.
678
00:26:07,130 --> 00:26:09,300
Oh, my goodness. They're coming back!
679
00:26:09,300 --> 00:26:10,260
What?
680
00:26:11,430 --> 00:26:11,430
Right, so you know how I said
681
00:26:11,430 --> 00:26:15,839
the survey hadn't come back?
682
00:26:15,839 --> 00:26:18,640
Oh, God. And what did it say?
683
00:26:18,640 --> 00:26:20,670
JULIAN How does she seem? Is she OK?
684
00:26:20,670 --> 00:26:20,670
I don't know.
685
00:26:20,670 --> 00:26:23,180
They're not getting out of the carriage.
686
00:26:23,180 --> 00:26:25,310
Well, there's good news and bad news.
687
00:26:25,310 --> 00:26:25,310
OK, OK, OK.
688
00:26:25,310 --> 00:26:28,250
Well, uh, give me the good news--
689
00:26:28,250 --> 00:26:28,250
The bad news is that
690
00:26:28,250 --> 00:26:30,550
the repairs are extensive,
691
00:26:30,550 --> 00:26:33,589
like, big structural stuff, plumbing, electrics.
692
00:26:33,589 --> 00:26:35,060
Can't even begin to renovate this place
693
00:26:35,060 --> 00:26:35,060
without a huge amount of cash
694
00:26:35,060 --> 00:26:39,260
to do those things.
695
00:26:39,260 --> 00:26:39,260
- OK. Yeah--
696
00:26:39,260 --> 00:26:41,930
- So, the good news is I took out a loan!
697
00:26:41,930 --> 00:26:41,930
- What?
698
00:26:41,930 --> 00:26:44,300
- Yeah. I took out a loan. Some loans.
699
00:26:44,300 --> 00:26:45,770
Paid some deposits.
700
00:26:45,770 --> 00:26:47,229
W-w-why didn't you tell me?
701
00:26:47,229 --> 00:26:49,300
Because I didn't want you to worry.
702
00:26:49,300 --> 00:26:51,510
This is your dream, right?
703
00:26:51,510 --> 00:26:51,510
I'm going to do everything I can
704
00:26:51,510 --> 00:26:53,739
to make it come true.
705
00:26:55,680 --> 00:26:57,839
Oh, they're already here. Come on then.
706
00:27:01,650 --> 00:27:01,650
- Hey.
707
00:27:01,650 --> 00:27:03,619
- All right, mate.
708
00:27:03,619 --> 00:27:03,619
- How you doing?
709
00:27:03,619 --> 00:27:04,780
- Terry.
710
00:27:07,550 --> 00:27:08,520
Hmm.
711
00:27:09,260 --> 00:27:09,260
So we're going
712
00:27:09,260 --> 00:27:11,290
to inspect the site, make it safe.
713
00:27:11,290 --> 00:27:13,890
Everyone has to wear one of these for now.
714
00:27:13,890 --> 00:27:13,890
Insurance reasons mainly,
715
00:27:13,890 --> 00:27:18,670
but, well, you just should.
716
00:27:18,670 --> 00:27:18,670
Cool.
717
00:27:18,670 --> 00:27:20,219
- Cracking on then.
718
00:27:22,140 --> 00:27:23,770
Exciting, isn't it, huh?
719
00:27:23,770 --> 00:27:23,770
Why don't you go have a lie down,
720
00:27:23,770 --> 00:27:25,760
and I'll grab your bags, yeah?
721
00:27:32,310 --> 00:27:33,750
You should be wearing a hard hat.
722
00:27:38,689 --> 00:27:38,689
Button House reduced
723
00:27:38,689 --> 00:27:42,989
to a tawdry boarding house.
724
00:27:42,989 --> 00:27:44,689
What will become of us?
725
00:27:44,689 --> 00:27:44,689
Oh, she spoke to me, she spoke to me,
726
00:27:44,689 --> 00:27:48,400
she saw me, she spoke to me.
727
00:27:48,400 --> 00:27:48,400
What?
728
00:27:48,400 --> 00:27:50,329
What the devil are you talking about?
729
00:27:54,300 --> 00:27:56,140
Oh, there you are.
730
00:27:56,140 --> 00:27:57,430
I thought you were getting some rest.
731
00:27:59,109 --> 00:28:01,040
No turning back now.
732
00:28:01,040 --> 00:28:01,040
- What if we made a mistake?
733
00:28:01,040 --> 00:28:02,910
- What?
734
00:28:02,910 --> 00:28:02,910
What if this was a bad idea
735
00:28:02,910 --> 00:28:05,449
and we should have just sold it?
736
00:28:05,449 --> 00:28:07,280
Don't say that. This is a great idea.
737
00:28:07,280 --> 00:28:07,280
It's going to take a lot of work,
738
00:28:07,280 --> 00:28:09,079
but we can do it.
739
00:28:11,619 --> 00:28:11,619
- Mike?
740
00:28:11,619 --> 00:28:14,760
- You're terrified, and I get it.
741
00:28:14,760 --> 00:28:16,959
Mike.
742
00:28:16,959 --> 00:28:19,589
I get it. I'm scared, too.
743
00:28:19,589 --> 00:28:19,589
This house and what we're doing,
744
00:28:19,589 --> 00:28:22,599
it's a huge challenge,
745
00:28:22,599 --> 00:28:22,599
and who knows what we're going
746
00:28:22,599 --> 00:28:24,770
to have to deal with on the way,
747
00:28:24,770 --> 00:28:27,229
but in the end, we've got each other.
748
00:28:27,229 --> 00:28:28,969
It's just us in this big old house.
749
00:28:28,969 --> 00:28:31,640
There's nothing to be scared of, is there?
750
00:28:33,910 --> 00:28:35,170
Ohh! Aa--
47256
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