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1
00:00:00,125 --> 00:00:01,543
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
2
00:00:01,626 --> 00:00:04,671
Helen Reddy?
Thirty seconds to curtain, Miss Reddy.
3
00:00:04,754 --> 00:00:07,215
Okay, Scooter, I'll be there,
4
00:00:07,298 --> 00:00:09,342
ready or not.
5
00:00:09,634 --> 00:00:12,971
Yeah. Did you mean to make that joke?
6
00:00:13,054 --> 00:00:16,099
Well, I meant to make that joke
before someone else did.
7
00:00:17,183 --> 00:00:19,269
You think we'd stoop that low?
8
00:00:19,352 --> 00:00:21,896
Hey, three to get ready.
9
00:00:23,106 --> 00:00:24,607
Lower.
10
00:00:26,985 --> 00:00:28,194
It's The Muppet Show,
11
00:00:28,278 --> 00:00:31,406
with our very special guest star,
Miss Helen Reddy.
12
00:00:31,489 --> 00:00:33,366
[CHEERS]
13
00:00:33,450 --> 00:00:35,618
[BAND PLAYING THEME MUSIC]
14
00:00:47,380 --> 00:00:49,382
♪ It's time to play the music ♪
15
00:00:49,466 --> 00:00:51,343
♪It's time to light the lights ♪
16
00:00:51,426 --> 00:00:55,638
♪ It's time to meet the Muppets
On The Muppet Show tonight ♪
17
00:00:55,722 --> 00:00:57,974
♪ It's time to put on makeup ♪
18
00:00:58,058 --> 00:01:00,101
♪ It's time to dress up right ♪
19
00:01:00,185 --> 00:01:02,062
♪ It's time to get things started ♪
20
00:01:02,145 --> 00:01:04,356
♪ Why don't you get things started? ♪
21
00:01:05,190 --> 00:01:07,650
-Hey, there's chickens in our seat.
-Shoo! Move it!
22
00:01:07,734 --> 00:01:08,818
[CHICKENS CLUCKING]
23
00:01:08,902 --> 00:01:13,239
♪ It's time to get things started
On the most sensational, inspirational ♪
24
00:01:13,323 --> 00:01:15,533
♪ Celebrational, Muppetational ♪
25
00:01:15,617 --> 00:01:18,244
♪ This is what we call ♪
26
00:01:18,328 --> 00:01:23,166
♪ The Muppet Show ♪
27
00:01:23,249 --> 00:01:25,335
[TINKLING]
28
00:01:30,173 --> 00:01:33,843
Thank you, thank you,
and welcome again to The Muppet Show.
29
00:01:33,927 --> 00:01:35,553
We've got a terrific show tonight.
30
00:01:35,637 --> 00:01:40,100
Our special guest is one of the world's
greatest singing talents, Helen Reddy.
31
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But right now, we whisk you back
through time and space
32
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to the Palace of Versailles,
33
00:01:45,980 --> 00:01:49,275
where Marie Antoinette
bears a striking resemblance
34
00:01:49,359 --> 00:01:52,153
to our own Miss Piggy.
35
00:01:53,238 --> 00:01:55,532
[BAND PLAYING STATELY ROCOCO MUSIC]
36
00:02:00,662 --> 00:02:02,747
[BAND PLAYING UPBEAT DISCO MUSIC]
37
00:02:05,333 --> 00:02:08,169
♪ Well, you can tell by the way
I use my walk ♪
38
00:02:08,253 --> 00:02:10,839
♪ I'm a woman, no time to talk ♪
39
00:02:10,922 --> 00:02:12,799
♪ Music loud, and I am warm ♪
40
00:02:12,882 --> 00:02:15,218
♪ I've been kicked around
Since I was born ♪
41
00:02:15,301 --> 00:02:20,223
♪ And now it's all right, it's okay
And you may look the other way ♪
42
00:02:20,306 --> 00:02:22,308
♪ We can try to understand ♪
43
00:02:22,392 --> 00:02:25,103
♪ The New York Times' effect on man ♪
44
00:02:25,186 --> 00:02:27,147
♪ Whether you're a brother
Or whether you're a mother ♪
45
00:02:27,230 --> 00:02:29,566
♪ You're stayin' alive, stayin' alive ♪
46
00:02:29,649 --> 00:02:32,152
♪ Feel the city breakin'
And everybody shakin' ♪
47
00:02:32,235 --> 00:02:34,320
♪ And we're stayin' alive, stayin' alive ♪
48
00:02:34,404 --> 00:02:39,325
ALL: ♪ Ah, ha, ha, ha
Stayin' alive, stayin' alive ♪
49
00:02:39,409 --> 00:02:41,661
♪ Ah, ha, ha, ha ♪
50
00:02:41,745 --> 00:02:49,127
♪ Stayin' alive ♪
51
00:02:56,259 --> 00:02:58,511
♪ Life goin' nowhere ♪
52
00:02:58,595 --> 00:03:01,639
♪ Somebody help me ♪
53
00:03:01,723 --> 00:03:02,974
♪ Somebody help me, yeah ♪
54
00:03:08,271 --> 00:03:10,982
ALL:
♪ Life goin' nowhere ♪
55
00:03:11,066 --> 00:03:14,027
♪ Somebody help me, yeah ♪
56
00:03:14,110 --> 00:03:19,574
♪ Stayin' alive ♪
57
00:03:38,259 --> 00:03:40,679
♪ Whether you're a brother
Or whether you're a mother ♪
58
00:03:40,762 --> 00:03:43,181
♪ You're stayin' alive, stayin' alive ♪
59
00:03:43,264 --> 00:03:45,392
♪ Feel the city breakin'
And everybody shakin' ♪
60
00:03:45,475 --> 00:03:47,686
♪ And we're stayin' alive, stayin' alive ♪
61
00:03:47,769 --> 00:03:52,607
♪ Ah, ha, ha, ha
Stayin' alive, stayin' alive ♪
62
00:03:52,691 --> 00:03:55,110
♪ Ah, ha, ha, ha ♪
63
00:03:55,193 --> 00:04:00,156
♪ Stayin' alive ♪
64
00:04:07,914 --> 00:04:10,208
-Well, I'll say this for them.
-What's that?
65
00:04:10,291 --> 00:04:13,586
They don't show favoritism.
They offend everyone.
66
00:04:13,670 --> 00:04:15,839
[BOTH LAUGHING]
67
00:04:17,090 --> 00:04:20,427
Aw, come on, let us eat cake.
Let us eat cake.
68
00:04:20,510 --> 00:04:24,097
Not only historically wrong
but hysterically wrong.
69
00:04:24,180 --> 00:04:27,142
-Sacré bleu.
-Uh, what does that mean?
70
00:04:27,225 --> 00:04:29,019
"Sacred blue."
71
00:04:29,102 --> 00:04:30,145
Oh.
72
00:04:30,228 --> 00:04:33,773
Yeesh. What a mess this place is.
Beauregard, I've got a job for you.
73
00:04:33,857 --> 00:04:36,234
-Oh, good.
-Just look at this mess.
74
00:04:36,317 --> 00:04:39,279
Okay, that sounds easy enough.
75
00:04:39,362 --> 00:04:43,491
Beauregard, the floor needs sweeping.
There's a broom around here someplace.
76
00:04:43,575 --> 00:04:45,326
Oh, yes, there it is.
77
00:04:45,410 --> 00:04:46,870
Well, step on it.
78
00:04:46,953 --> 00:04:48,288
Okay.
79
00:04:48,371 --> 00:04:49,914
[STAMPS THEN GRUNTS]
80
00:04:52,500 --> 00:04:54,127
Hey, that's a neat trick.
81
00:04:54,210 --> 00:04:56,921
Beauregard, use some elbow grease.
82
00:04:57,005 --> 00:04:58,882
Elbow grease?
83
00:04:58,965 --> 00:05:01,051
[CREAKING]
84
00:05:02,469 --> 00:05:04,971
Why didn't I think of that?
85
00:05:06,806 --> 00:05:11,311
And now it's an honor to have one
of the world's greatest recording stars,
86
00:05:11,394 --> 00:05:14,981
and here she is, swinging up a storm
at an informal session
87
00:05:15,065 --> 00:05:19,069
in the Muppets' private studio,
ladies and gentlemen, Helen Reddy!
88
00:05:19,152 --> 00:05:23,323
One, two. One, two, three...
89
00:05:23,406 --> 00:05:25,492
[PLAYING MELLOW POP MUSIC]
90
00:05:30,330 --> 00:05:35,502
♪ When you can't find a friend ♪
91
00:05:35,585 --> 00:05:39,547
♪ And the road doesn't seem to end ♪
92
00:05:39,631 --> 00:05:46,346
♪ And you're lonesome
The whole day through ♪
93
00:05:46,429 --> 00:05:50,266
♪ How can you be happy? ♪
94
00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:54,145
♪ How can you be smiling? ♪
95
00:05:54,229 --> 00:05:57,232
♪ How can you be anything ♪
96
00:05:57,315 --> 00:06:01,569
♪ But low down, saggy and blue? ♪
97
00:06:04,656 --> 00:06:06,074
Hey, Roger, how's the balance?
98
00:06:06,157 --> 00:06:09,369
-Animal's a little too loud on the drums.
-Oh, okay.
99
00:06:09,452 --> 00:06:10,620
Hey, Animal.
100
00:06:10,704 --> 00:06:15,125
[IN FAINT VOICE]
Animal! Animal! Animal! Stop it!
101
00:06:17,419 --> 00:06:21,297
♪ How can you be smiling? ♪
102
00:06:21,381 --> 00:06:25,176
♪ How can you be singing? ♪
103
00:06:25,260 --> 00:06:28,471
♪ How can you be anything ♪
104
00:06:28,555 --> 00:06:32,308
♪ But low down, saggy and blue? ♪
105
00:06:35,061 --> 00:06:41,609
♪ I look around
And see the sweet life everywhere ♪
106
00:06:41,693 --> 00:06:47,741
♪ I watch the cookie bushes shining
In the sun ♪
107
00:06:49,325 --> 00:06:53,538
♪ The smell of sweet vanilla living ♪
108
00:06:53,621 --> 00:06:57,834
♪ Blows in every breath of air ♪
109
00:06:57,917 --> 00:07:01,588
♪ Doesn't anybody want me? ♪
110
00:07:01,671 --> 00:07:05,383
♪ Doesn't anybody care? ♪
111
00:07:05,467 --> 00:07:09,512
-♪ When you're wrinkled and cold ♪
CHORUS: ♪ Ah-ah ♪
112
00:07:09,596 --> 00:07:13,433
-♪ And your fortune has all been told ♪
-♪ Ah-ah ♪
113
00:07:13,516 --> 00:07:20,398
-♪ And you're nobody's I love you ♪
-♪ Ah-ah, ah-ah-ah-ah-ah ♪
114
00:07:20,482 --> 00:07:24,402
♪ How can you be happy? ♪
115
00:07:24,486 --> 00:07:28,365
♪ How can you be singing? ♪
116
00:07:28,448 --> 00:07:31,659
♪ How can you be anything ♪
117
00:07:31,743 --> 00:07:34,704
♪ But low down, saggy and blue? ♪
118
00:07:34,788 --> 00:07:36,373
♪ Sad but true ♪
119
00:07:36,456 --> 00:07:40,585
♪ How can you be happy? ♪
120
00:07:40,669 --> 00:07:44,589
♪ How can you be singing? ♪
121
00:07:44,673 --> 00:07:47,884
-♪ How can you be anything ♪
-♪ Bah, bah-bah-bah ♪
122
00:07:47,967 --> 00:07:53,139
-But low down, saggy and rag-bag baggy ♪
-♪ Bah-bah-bah ♪
123
00:07:53,223 --> 00:08:00,522
♪ And blue? ♪
124
00:08:04,442 --> 00:08:05,944
[ANIMAL POUNDING DRUMS]
125
00:08:14,536 --> 00:08:17,038
You know,
if I had a voice like Helen Reddy,
126
00:08:17,122 --> 00:08:19,124
I'd never be on The Muppet Show.
127
00:08:19,207 --> 00:08:24,546
Right. If you had a voice
like Helen Reddy, you'd be in a sideshow.
128
00:08:29,509 --> 00:08:33,096
Ah, hey, very good, Beauregard.
It really looks great.
129
00:08:33,179 --> 00:08:36,016
You've swept it spotless
and polished it too.
130
00:08:36,099 --> 00:08:39,602
Well, I couldn't find any elbow grease.
131
00:08:39,686 --> 00:08:41,563
I expect not.
132
00:08:41,646 --> 00:08:43,940
So I used axle grease.
133
00:08:44,024 --> 00:08:45,734
[YELPING]
134
00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:48,611
Whoa!
135
00:08:50,697 --> 00:08:52,657
Brother!
136
00:08:54,451 --> 00:08:57,078
Beauregard, what kind of an idiot are you?
137
00:08:57,162 --> 00:09:00,457
Oh. I didn't know there was a choice.
138
00:09:01,499 --> 00:09:02,709
Floyd, watch out!
139
00:09:02,792 --> 00:09:04,961
Huh? Whoa!
140
00:09:06,338 --> 00:09:08,548
What a drag.
141
00:09:08,631 --> 00:09:10,675
[KERMIT STAMMERS]
142
00:09:10,759 --> 00:09:12,844
[YELLING]
143
00:09:15,305 --> 00:09:18,308
Beauregard, how do you manage
to stay upright?
144
00:09:18,391 --> 00:09:21,061
Well, I'm wearing these special shoes.
145
00:09:21,144 --> 00:09:24,189
-You wanna borrow them?
-I can't get anyplace without them.
146
00:09:24,272 --> 00:09:27,108
-Good.
-Okay.
147
00:09:27,192 --> 00:09:30,236
Gotta get my flippers into these slippers.
148
00:09:30,320 --> 00:09:32,697
These are non-slippers.
149
00:09:32,781 --> 00:09:36,368
Yeah. Okay, what is the secret
of these miracle shoes?
150
00:09:36,451 --> 00:09:39,829
Oh, there's no secret.
I just nailed them to the floor.
151
00:09:39,913 --> 00:09:43,625
Whoa! Whoa!
152
00:09:45,293 --> 00:09:46,336
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
153
00:09:46,419 --> 00:09:47,462
ANIMAL & CHEF:
Helen!
154
00:09:47,545 --> 00:09:49,422
-Come in.
ANIMAL: Helen!
155
00:09:49,506 --> 00:09:50,965
Come in!
156
00:09:51,049 --> 00:09:53,176
ANIMAL:
Thank you!
157
00:09:53,259 --> 00:09:55,553
[ANIMAL & CHEF SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
158
00:09:58,390 --> 00:10:00,892
[CHEF HUMMING NOTE]
159
00:10:00,975 --> 00:10:05,355
-♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
-♪ Bork, bork, bork, bork, to you ♪
160
00:10:05,438 --> 00:10:09,025
-♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
-♪ Bork, bork, bork, bork, to you ♪
161
00:10:09,109 --> 00:10:12,278
-♪ Happy birthday, dear Helen ♪
-♪ Bork, bork, bork, bork, dear Helen ♪
162
00:10:12,362 --> 00:10:15,115
There's been some mistake.
Today is not my birthday.
163
00:10:16,282 --> 00:10:17,409
Huh?
164
00:10:19,327 --> 00:10:23,748
♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells
Jingle all the way ♪
165
00:10:24,374 --> 00:10:28,003
And so my great-uncle Beauregard
said to me, he said:
166
00:10:28,086 --> 00:10:32,924
"Beauregard, you go into show business,
and you'll clean up. "
167
00:10:33,967 --> 00:10:36,386
And you know something? He was right.
168
00:10:36,469 --> 00:10:38,805
You're named Beauregard after him?
169
00:10:38,888 --> 00:10:41,933
About 40 years after.
170
00:10:42,017 --> 00:10:44,728
KERMIT: Beauregard!
-Oh, I'm working, I'm working.
171
00:10:44,811 --> 00:10:46,855
That's what I was afraid of.
Stop polishing.
172
00:10:46,938 --> 00:10:48,356
I've only done a little bit.
173
00:10:48,440 --> 00:10:50,608
-Ah, get off! Off, off, off!
-Oh!
174
00:10:50,692 --> 00:10:52,402
Uh, now, ladies and gentlemen,
175
00:10:52,485 --> 00:10:54,446
we are going to have
a brilliant dance number
176
00:10:54,529 --> 00:10:56,489
by our own Fozzie Bear and Friends.
177
00:10:56,573 --> 00:10:58,158
But excuse me one second. Fozzie?
178
00:10:58,241 --> 00:10:59,617
Yeah, yeah. What?
179
00:10:59,701 --> 00:11:02,746
Be careful.
There's a slippery place on the stage.
180
00:11:02,829 --> 00:11:05,623
-Where is that?
-I don't know. Right around here-- Aah!
181
00:11:06,750 --> 00:11:08,543
Thank you.
182
00:11:08,626 --> 00:11:10,545
Uh, curtain!
183
00:11:10,628 --> 00:11:12,005
[YELPS]
184
00:11:12,088 --> 00:11:14,174
[BAND PLAYING TRANQUIL JAZZ MUSIC]
185
00:11:19,596 --> 00:11:21,348
A-ha.
186
00:11:24,726 --> 00:11:26,019
Whoa!
187
00:11:26,102 --> 00:11:27,937
[CRASHES]
188
00:11:28,980 --> 00:11:32,442
Uh, be careful.
There's a wet spot here on the stage.
189
00:11:32,525 --> 00:11:33,943
[CHUCKLES]
190
00:11:36,154 --> 00:11:38,698
Careful. It's right there. Right there.
191
00:11:39,783 --> 00:11:41,826
Terrific, guys. You look great.
192
00:11:41,910 --> 00:11:44,120
Whoa!
193
00:11:45,663 --> 00:11:49,959
Uh, guys, be careful.
There's a place right here.
194
00:11:50,043 --> 00:11:53,129
Watch out, there's a wet place!
Watch out, right there!
195
00:11:56,508 --> 00:11:57,550
What the...?
196
00:11:57,634 --> 00:11:59,260
Whoa!
197
00:12:00,512 --> 00:12:04,933
Go to the front. Go ahead.
I'll go back here. Hey!
198
00:12:05,016 --> 00:12:07,686
Whoa! Whoa!
199
00:12:07,769 --> 00:12:09,104
Whoa!
200
00:12:09,187 --> 00:12:10,939
Wh--! Whoa, hey!
201
00:12:11,022 --> 00:12:13,108
[CRASHING]
202
00:12:14,943 --> 00:12:18,113
NEWSCASTER:
Here is a Muppet news flash.
203
00:12:18,196 --> 00:12:20,699
Dateline Silver Spring, Maryland.
204
00:12:20,782 --> 00:12:22,033
At this very moment,
205
00:12:22,117 --> 00:12:24,703
Mr. and Mrs. George Laser of Silver Spring
206
00:12:24,786 --> 00:12:29,582
are attempting to break the world's record
for overhand refrigerator throwing.
207
00:12:29,666 --> 00:12:31,084
And--
208
00:12:34,421 --> 00:12:36,506
[PLAYING TRANQUIL CLASSICAL MUSIC]
209
00:12:42,470 --> 00:12:44,556
[HUMMING ALONG]
210
00:13:00,697 --> 00:13:02,782
[BUST SNORING]
211
00:13:28,099 --> 00:13:30,185
[HUMMING ALONG]
212
00:13:31,728 --> 00:13:34,981
-Don't hum.
-Yes, sir.
213
00:13:54,834 --> 00:13:56,920
[SNORING]
214
00:13:59,005 --> 00:14:00,048
[SNORTS]
215
00:14:38,878 --> 00:14:43,466
You know, Helen, you did a song about,
oh, I don't know, a few years ago.
216
00:14:43,550 --> 00:14:46,177
It's one of my favorite songs of all time.
217
00:14:46,261 --> 00:14:47,804
Really? Which one was it?
218
00:14:47,887 --> 00:14:51,099
Well, it was called
"You and Me Against the World."
219
00:14:51,182 --> 00:14:54,144
Oh, sure.
That was a song I did with my daughter.
220
00:14:54,227 --> 00:14:56,730
-Oh, yeah? You did it with your daughter?
-Yeah. Mm-hm.
221
00:14:56,813 --> 00:15:02,193
Well, um, do you suppose that, um,
you could do it with a frog?
222
00:15:02,277 --> 00:15:03,862
You mean just you and me?
223
00:15:03,945 --> 00:15:05,405
Mm-hm.
224
00:15:05,488 --> 00:15:07,157
I think so.
225
00:15:07,240 --> 00:15:09,325
[BAND PLAYING TENDER POP MUSIC]
226
00:15:15,165 --> 00:15:20,503
♪ You and me against the world ♪
227
00:15:20,587 --> 00:15:23,006
♪ Sometimes it feels like ♪
228
00:15:23,089 --> 00:15:27,385
♪ You and me against the world ♪
229
00:15:27,469 --> 00:15:33,767
♪ When all the others
Turn their backs and walk away ♪
230
00:15:33,850 --> 00:15:39,105
♪ You can count on me to stay ♪
231
00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:46,780
♪ Remember when the circus came to town ♪
232
00:15:49,199 --> 00:15:54,621
♪ And you were frightened by the clown ♪
233
00:15:56,081 --> 00:15:59,709
♪ Wasn't it nice to be around ♪
234
00:15:59,793 --> 00:16:03,046
♪ Someone that you knew ♪
235
00:16:03,129 --> 00:16:06,675
♪ Someone who was big and strong ♪
236
00:16:06,758 --> 00:16:10,553
♪ And looking out for you ♪
237
00:16:10,637 --> 00:16:16,351
♪ And me against the world ♪
238
00:16:16,434 --> 00:16:19,396
♪ Sometimes it feels like ♪
239
00:16:19,479 --> 00:16:22,857
♪ You and me against the world ♪
240
00:16:25,443 --> 00:16:29,948
♪ And for all the times we've cried ♪
241
00:16:30,031 --> 00:16:35,495
♪ I always felt that God was on our side ♪
242
00:16:38,164 --> 00:16:42,585
♪ And when one of us is gone ♪
243
00:16:43,670 --> 00:16:49,259
♪ And one of us is left to carry on ♪
244
00:16:51,928 --> 00:16:56,850
♪ Then remembering will have to do ♪
245
00:16:56,933 --> 00:17:02,313
♪ Our memories alone will get us through ♪
246
00:17:04,065 --> 00:17:09,404
♪ Think about the days of me and you ♪
247
00:17:11,865 --> 00:17:18,788
BOTH:
♪ You and me against the world ♪
248
00:17:30,717 --> 00:17:32,927
-Hey, Beau?
-Yes, sir?
249
00:17:33,011 --> 00:17:35,305
I see the floors are no longer slippery.
250
00:17:35,388 --> 00:17:40,268
Oh, well, that's probably because Kermit
told me to spread a little sand around.
251
00:17:40,352 --> 00:17:41,936
A little sand?
252
00:17:42,020 --> 00:17:45,857
Somebody ought to teach you
the meaning of "a little," though.
253
00:17:45,940 --> 00:17:47,567
I don't believe this.
254
00:17:47,650 --> 00:17:50,153
[CAMEL BLEATING]
255
00:17:50,236 --> 00:17:52,530
You believe that?
256
00:17:53,698 --> 00:17:54,866
[KERMIT SIGHS]
257
00:17:56,451 --> 00:17:59,662
NARRATOR:
And now Veterinarian's Hospital,
258
00:17:59,746 --> 00:18:05,752
the continuing story of a quack
who's gone to the dogs.
259
00:18:05,835 --> 00:18:07,212
Hubba hubba.
260
00:18:07,295 --> 00:18:08,505
Oh! Ahem.
261
00:18:08,588 --> 00:18:10,715
[PIGGY GRUNTS]
262
00:18:10,799 --> 00:18:14,344
-So, where's the next patient?
-Oh, right here, Dr. Bob.
263
00:18:14,427 --> 00:18:18,807
Oh. Oh, look at that. He looks cold.
We'd better turn up the heat.
264
00:18:19,516 --> 00:18:22,769
Dr. Bob, those are not earmuffs
he's wearing.
265
00:18:22,852 --> 00:18:26,648
He was in the recording studio.
Don't you know about headsets?
266
00:18:26,731 --> 00:18:30,318
Of course. The head sets on the neck,
the neck sets on the shoulders.
267
00:18:30,402 --> 00:18:31,611
[PIGGY & JANICE GROAN]
268
00:18:31,695 --> 00:18:34,489
I learned that the first year
in doctor class.
269
00:18:34,572 --> 00:18:37,617
Dr. Bob, have you forgotten
about the patient?
270
00:18:37,701 --> 00:18:41,913
No, the patient is the one who's sick.
I learned that the second year.
271
00:18:42,997 --> 00:18:47,335
No, Dr. Bob, this patient.
He's lost his hearing.
272
00:18:47,419 --> 00:18:52,007
Well, maybe he dropped it someplace.
I'll look under the table.
273
00:18:52,090 --> 00:18:55,719
What kind was it?
A clip-on or one of those pierce jobs?
274
00:18:55,802 --> 00:19:01,683
Not his earring, his hearing, Dr. Bob.
This man can't hear anything.
275
00:19:01,766 --> 00:19:04,894
Ah, he's lucky.
I've heard every dumb word.
276
00:19:04,978 --> 00:19:06,604
Well, let's get these off.
277
00:19:06,688 --> 00:19:08,773
[BOB GRUNTING]
278
00:19:11,026 --> 00:19:13,653
-There we go.
-Can you hear me?
279
00:19:13,737 --> 00:19:15,572
Of course I can hear you.
280
00:19:15,655 --> 00:19:17,198
Not you, him.
281
00:19:17,282 --> 00:19:20,243
How can I hear him?
He hasn't said a word. Ha-ha-ha.
282
00:19:21,036 --> 00:19:25,165
If Florence Nightingale had to put up
with this, she'd have been a waitress.
283
00:19:25,915 --> 00:19:28,668
Well, I can't do anything
about his hearing now.
284
00:19:28,752 --> 00:19:30,170
Call me tomorrow.
285
00:19:30,253 --> 00:19:31,338
No, Dr. Bob.
286
00:19:31,421 --> 00:19:33,715
-You're responsible for his ears.
-Mm.
287
00:19:33,798 --> 00:19:34,883
You're right.
288
00:19:34,966 --> 00:19:37,093
♪ Call me "ear responsible" ♪
289
00:19:37,177 --> 00:19:38,303
♪ Call me... ♪
290
00:19:38,386 --> 00:19:43,058
NARRATOR: And so we come to the end
of another Veterinarian's Hospital.
291
00:19:43,141 --> 00:19:47,979
Tune in next week,
when you'll hear Dr. Bob say:
292
00:19:48,063 --> 00:19:51,358
Ah, no wonder he can't hear anything.
293
00:19:51,441 --> 00:19:54,194
He has a little drum in there.
It'll have to come out.
294
00:19:54,277 --> 00:19:57,947
No, no, no. That's his eardrum.
That stays.
295
00:19:58,031 --> 00:20:00,450
What about the tiny little piano and bass?
296
00:20:00,533 --> 00:20:02,744
[PIGGY & JANICE GROAN]
297
00:20:06,498 --> 00:20:08,583
[BAND PLAYING UPBEAT FOLK MUSIC]
298
00:20:11,086 --> 00:20:13,546
[IN AUSTRALIAN ACCENT]
♪ Tie me kangaroo down, sport ♪
299
00:20:13,630 --> 00:20:15,924
♪ Tie me kangaroo down ♪
300
00:20:16,007 --> 00:20:18,385
ALL:
♪ Tie me kangaroo down, mate ♪
301
00:20:18,468 --> 00:20:19,803
♪ Tie me kangaroo down ♪
302
00:20:19,886 --> 00:20:20,929
All together now.
303
00:20:21,012 --> 00:20:23,390
♪ Tie me kangaroo down, sport ♪
304
00:20:23,473 --> 00:20:25,725
♪ Tie me kangaroo down ♪
305
00:20:25,809 --> 00:20:28,228
♪ Tie me kangaroo down, mate ♪
306
00:20:28,311 --> 00:20:29,771
♪ Tie me kangaroo down ♪
307
00:20:29,854 --> 00:20:30,897
Hup! Hup!
308
00:20:30,980 --> 00:20:32,148
♪ Tie me kangaroo down ♪
309
00:20:32,232 --> 00:20:33,274
One! Two!
310
00:20:33,358 --> 00:20:34,693
♪ Tie me kangaroo down ♪
311
00:20:34,776 --> 00:20:35,819
Jump! Jump!
312
00:20:35,902 --> 00:20:38,488
♪ Tie me kangaroo down ♪
313
00:20:38,571 --> 00:20:40,657
[ALL CLAMORING]
314
00:20:45,495 --> 00:20:48,331
Well, uh, no more sand.
315
00:20:48,415 --> 00:20:50,583
And the slipperiness is gone.
316
00:20:50,667 --> 00:20:53,336
Hey, nice going, guys. Way to go.
317
00:20:53,420 --> 00:20:55,880
Well, that takes care of the sand.
318
00:20:55,964 --> 00:20:58,341
Yep. And I'm glad to be rid of it.
319
00:20:58,425 --> 00:21:01,928
Yeah, I swept all the sand out of here.
320
00:21:02,012 --> 00:21:04,389
-Now, where did you put it?
-Next door.
321
00:21:04,472 --> 00:21:06,683
But that's the stage.
322
00:21:08,560 --> 00:21:10,311
Well, what are we gonna do?
323
00:21:10,395 --> 00:21:13,148
What can we do? Uh, get some costumes...
324
00:21:13,231 --> 00:21:15,108
-Costumes.
-Scooter, get a couple of tents!
325
00:21:15,191 --> 00:21:16,526
-Scooter!
-Fozzie, a palm tree!
326
00:21:16,609 --> 00:21:19,946
-Palm tree!
-Uh, and bring back that camel!
327
00:21:20,030 --> 00:21:21,072
Camel!
328
00:21:21,156 --> 00:21:23,783
You're lucky.
I happen to have a palm tree.
329
00:21:25,577 --> 00:21:27,954
Uh, and now, once again,
ladies and gentlemen,
330
00:21:28,038 --> 00:21:30,915
our very special guest star--
Uh, are you ready back there?
331
00:21:30,999 --> 00:21:32,334
MAN:
No, we're not ready.
332
00:21:32,417 --> 00:21:35,754
Oh. I'll just tell you something
about Helen Reddy.
333
00:21:35,837 --> 00:21:37,630
MAN:
I said we weren't ready.
334
00:21:37,714 --> 00:21:39,466
I wasn't talking to you.
335
00:21:39,549 --> 00:21:41,593
MAN:
Okay, we're ready.
336
00:21:41,676 --> 00:21:45,972
Uh, ladies and gentlemen, Helen Reddy.
Oh, I hope this works.
337
00:21:47,974 --> 00:21:50,060
[BAND PLAYING UPBEAT POP MUSIC]
338
00:22:02,822 --> 00:22:06,993
♪ We'll sing in the sunshine ♪
339
00:22:07,077 --> 00:22:11,289
♪ We'll laugh every day ♪
340
00:22:11,373 --> 00:22:15,418
♪ We'll sing in the sunshine ♪
341
00:22:15,502 --> 00:22:19,297
♪ Then I'll be on my way ♪
342
00:22:25,595 --> 00:22:29,557
♪ I will never love you ♪
343
00:22:29,641 --> 00:22:33,812
♪ The cost of love's too dear ♪
344
00:22:33,895 --> 00:22:37,816
♪ But though I'll never love you ♪
345
00:22:37,899 --> 00:22:40,819
♪ I'll stay with you for a year ♪
346
00:22:40,902 --> 00:22:45,115
♪ And we can sing in the sunshine ♪
347
00:22:45,198 --> 00:22:49,327
♪ We'll laugh every day ♪
348
00:22:49,411 --> 00:22:53,456
♪ We'll sing in the sunshine ♪
349
00:22:53,540 --> 00:22:56,710
♪ Then I'll be on my way ♪
350
00:23:03,383 --> 00:23:07,429
♪ I'll sing to you each morning ♪
351
00:23:07,512 --> 00:23:12,017
♪ I'll kiss you every night ♪
352
00:23:12,100 --> 00:23:15,979
♪ But, darling, don't cling to me ♪
353
00:23:16,062 --> 00:23:18,982
♪ I'll soon be out of sight ♪
354
00:23:19,065 --> 00:23:22,318
♪ But we can sing in the sunshine ♪
355
00:23:23,528 --> 00:23:27,657
♪ We'll laugh every day ♪
356
00:23:27,741 --> 00:23:31,619
♪ We'll sing in the sunshine ♪
357
00:23:31,703 --> 00:23:35,415
♪ Then I'll be on my way ♪
358
00:24:14,454 --> 00:24:18,541
♪ We'll sing in the sunshine ♪
359
00:24:18,625 --> 00:24:22,712
♪ We'll laugh every day ♪
360
00:24:22,796 --> 00:24:26,883
♪ We'll sing in the sunshine ♪
361
00:24:26,966 --> 00:24:30,053
♪ Then I'll be on my way ♪
362
00:24:31,262 --> 00:24:34,516
♪ Then I'll be on my way ♪
363
00:24:35,767 --> 00:24:40,772
♪ Then I'll be on my way ♪
364
00:24:58,248 --> 00:25:00,375
Now, we could go on like this for hours,
365
00:25:00,458 --> 00:25:03,044
but we've grown to like you,
so we'll stop.
366
00:25:03,128 --> 00:25:06,172
But not before we say thank you
to our wonderful guest star,
367
00:25:06,256 --> 00:25:09,050
Helen Reddy! Yay!
368
00:25:12,387 --> 00:25:13,555
Thank you, Kermit.
369
00:25:13,638 --> 00:25:16,474
I can't tell you how much
I enjoyed working with a camel.
370
00:25:16,558 --> 00:25:18,435
Oh, you say you enjoyed it?
371
00:25:18,518 --> 00:25:21,229
I said, I can't tell you that.
372
00:25:24,482 --> 00:25:27,902
Hey, lady, you like him? He's yours.
373
00:25:28,945 --> 00:25:30,739
Oh.
374
00:25:31,072 --> 00:25:33,033
Good grief. What's his name?
375
00:25:33,116 --> 00:25:34,284
Sopwith.
376
00:25:34,367 --> 00:25:36,911
Sopwith the camel?
377
00:25:36,995 --> 00:25:40,331
We'll see you next time
on The Muppet Show.
378
00:25:40,415 --> 00:25:42,500
[ALL CHATTERING]
379
00:25:42,584 --> 00:25:44,669
[BAND PLAYING THEME MUSIC]
380
00:26:19,954 --> 00:26:22,082
-Just as I thought.
-What's that?
381
00:26:22,165 --> 00:26:24,918
After this show, nothing hurts.
28409
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