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It's The Muppet Show,
with our very special guest star, Twiggy!
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[BAND PLAYING THEME MUSIC]
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♪ It's time to play the music ♪
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♪ It's time to light the lights ♪
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♪ It's time to meet the Muppets
On The Muppet Show tonight ♪
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♪ It's time to put on makeup ♪
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♪ It's time to dress up right ♪
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♪ It's time to raise the curtain
On The Muppet Show tonight ♪
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Hey, I went to a resort hotel
for a change and a rest.
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The waiter got the change,
and the hotel got the rest. Ha!
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♪ To introduce our guest star ♪
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♪ That's what I'm here to do ♪
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♪ So it really makes me happy ♪
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♪ To introduce to you ♪
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Twiggy!
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[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
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♪ But now let's get things started
On the most sensational, inspirational ♪
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♪ Celebrational, Muppetational ♪
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♪ This is what we call ♪
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♪ The Muppet Show ♪
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[BOINGING]
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[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
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Thank you, thank you.
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Good evening, gang, welcome to the show,
and what a show it is,
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because tonight our special guest is
a beautiful young lady
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whose face is known the world over.
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She only has one name but many talents,
the one and only Twiggy.
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We'll meet her in a few minutes,
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but right now, let's get things swinging
on The Muppet Show.
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One, two. One, two, three.
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CHORUS:
Whoo!
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[BAND PLAYING DISCO MUSIC]
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♪ Whoo! ♪
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♪ Whoo! ♪
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♪ Ah ♪
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♪ Dance! ♪
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♪ Dance! ♪
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-♪ I gotta shake my shoulders ♪
CHORUS: ♪ Dance! ♪
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-♪ I gotta move my bones, yeah ♪
-♪ Dance! ♪
40
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-♪ I gotta keep on grooving ♪
-♪ Dance! ♪
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♪ As long as my motor runs ♪
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-♪ I can jump, stomp my feet ♪
-♪ Unh, unh, unh ♪
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♪ Blame it on the rhythm
Let me hear the beat ♪
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♪ 'Cause I get loose and lose my juice ♪
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♪ When I dance ♪
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CHORUS:
♪ Dance! ♪
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♪ Whoo! ♪
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♪ Whoo! ♪
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♪ Ah ♪
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♪ Dance! ♪
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-♪ I gotta shake my shoulders ♪
-♪ Dance! ♪
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-♪ I gotta move my bones, yeah ♪
-♪ Dance! ♪
53
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-♪ I gotta keep on grooving ♪
-♪ Dance! ♪
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♪ As long as my motor runs ♪
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-♪ Something rare, don't be square ♪
-♪ Unh, unh, unh ♪
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♪ Keep on grooving now
It's your best bet ♪
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♪ If you must ♪
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♪ Rose Mary's angel dust
Will make you dance! ♪
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♪ Ooh ♪
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CHORUS:
♪ Dance! ♪
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-♪ Ooh ♪
CHORUS: ♪ Whoo! ♪
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♪ Whoo! ♪
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♪ Ah ♪
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♪ Dance! ♪
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-Was that a great number?
-I don't know. I slept through it.
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Me too. That's why I asked.
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Okay. Very nice.
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You have come a long way
since you were feather dusters.
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Thank you.
I enjoyed it ever so much, really, I did.
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-Kermit? Kermit.
-Hmm?
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Call me kooky, call me crazy, but I think
there's a Phantom of The Muppet Show.
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-You're kooky, you're crazy.
-No, I'm serious.
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I was up in the star's dressing room,
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and I saw the most ghoulish,
fiendish-looking face in the closet.
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That was me, clown.
I was hanging up the wardrobe.
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No, no. After you left.
Listen, Kermit, I'm serious.
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There's something here
that should be looked into.
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Yes, your head.
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Phantom of The Muppet Show.
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[CHUCKLES]
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Uh, look, Scooter, we're busy,
but we'll keep our eyes open.
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I mean, seriously, I think you've been
using your imagination too much.
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If there's a Phantom of The Muppet Show,
I'm a monkey's uncle.
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[WANDA SCREAMS]
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Help! There's a phantom
in the dressing room!
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[SCREAMS]
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Anybody got a banana?
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Right now,
I'd like to introduce the lovely Leafy--
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Uh, Barky-- No, Branchy-- Uh...
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Twiggy.
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Do I get credit for being close?
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[REPORTERS CHATTERING]
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Hello, everyone.
Thank you all for coming here today.
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REPORTER 1:
You're welcome.
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I really love press conferences,
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but I will try and answer
any questions that you might have.
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[REPORTERS CLAMORING]
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REPORTER 2: I have a question.
-Yes?
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Uh, Miss Twiggy,
how is it that a beautiful girl like you
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only has one nose?
101
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Eh? Um...
Well, I mean, that's usual, isn't it?
102
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Oh, yeah. So I noticed.
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[CLAMORING]
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KERMIT: Twiggy... Wait a minute.
-Twiggy!
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I have a serious question.
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Uh, who are the most important people
in your life?
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-Yeah, and what about the places?
-Yeah. That would be interesting.
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[CLAMORING]
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[BAND PLAYING "IN MY LIFE"]
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♪ There are places I remember ♪
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♪ All my life ♪
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♪ Though some have changed ♪
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♪ Some forever, not for better ♪
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♪ Some have gone, and some remain ♪
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♪ All these places had their moments ♪
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♪ With lovers and friends
I still can recall ♪
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♪ Some are dead, and some are living ♪
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♪ In my life
I've loved them all ♪
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♪ Though I know
I'll never lose affection ♪
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♪ For places and things
I still can recall ♪
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♪ And I know I'll often stop
And think about them ♪
122
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♪ In my life
I've loved them all ♪
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[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
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Ah, Twiggy makes my heart sing.
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-Oh, well, let me hear.
-Hmm?
126
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Ah, nice song,
but your pacemaker needs tuning.
127
00:08:03,108 --> 00:08:07,529
Aah! Don't do that.
Don't you know that this is serious?
128
00:08:07,612 --> 00:08:10,699
Everybody here is scared
of the Phantom of The Muppet Show.
129
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Kermit, you've got to do something.
130
00:08:13,451 --> 00:08:14,828
Yeah. Fozzie's right.
131
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I just saw the most terrifying face
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peering out
from behind the sewing machine.
133
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-Oh, that was me again, you nitwit.
-No, it was after you left.
134
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-Oh, scaredy-cats.
GONZO & FOZZIE: Scaredy-cats?
135
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FOZZIE:
I'll have you know...
136
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Listen to me. This is ridiculous.
137
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Keep your head on your shoulders.
138
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That's better.
139
00:08:39,310 --> 00:08:42,022
Oh, sure. Sure, you can joke all you want.
140
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But there is something funny
going on around here.
141
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Fine. But there better be something funny
going on out there.
142
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-Come on, move it.
-All right. Go, go, go!
143
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Phantom of The Muppet Show. Yeesh.
144
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[CACKLING]
145
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Ah, what fools these Muppets be.
146
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[CACKLING]
147
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Mm, ahem.
148
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Right now,
the ever-popular Wayne and Wanda,
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and their version of that great oldie
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"Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!"
151
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Oh, let it work, let it work, let it work.
152
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[BAND PLAYING
"LET IT SNOW! LET IT SNOW! LET IT SNOW!"]
153
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♪ Oh, the weather outside is frightful ♪
154
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♪ But the fire is so delightful ♪
155
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♪ But if you've no place to go ♪
156
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BOTH:
♪ Let it snow, let it snow, let it-- ♪
157
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Funny. Funny. Ha!
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[SIGHS]
159
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Ow! Oh, my nose. Oh.
160
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Thank you.
161
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-Hello, you two.
-Oh, hi, Twiggy.
162
00:09:59,224 --> 00:10:03,103
Hey, Muppy and I were hoping
you'd tell us a bedtime story.
163
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Oh, I'd love to,
but what would you like to hear?
164
00:10:05,730 --> 00:10:09,317
Well, Muppy here really likes the poems
of A.A. Milne.
165
00:10:09,401 --> 00:10:13,530
-You wouldn't know one, would you?
-Know one? I've rehearsed one.
166
00:10:13,613 --> 00:10:16,616
It's called "The King's Breakfast."
167
00:10:16,700 --> 00:10:18,952
[BAND PLAYING BAROQUE MUSIC]
168
00:10:25,959 --> 00:10:30,005
The King asked The Queen,
And The Queen asked The dairymaid:
169
00:10:30,088 --> 00:10:33,883
Could we have some butter
For the royal slice of bread?
170
00:10:33,967 --> 00:10:35,635
The Queen asked the Dairymaid,
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The Dairymaid said, "Certainly,
I'll go and see the cow now
172
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Before she goes to bed."
173
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The Dairymaid, she curtsied,
174
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And went to see The Alderney:
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"Don't forget the butter
For the royal slice of bread."
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The Alderney said sleepily:
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You'd better tell His Majesty
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That many people nowadays
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Like marmalade instead.
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The Dairymaid said, "Fancy!"
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And went to Her Majesty.
182
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She curtsied to the Queen,
And she turned a little red:
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"Excuse me, Your Majesty,
184
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For taking of the liberty,
185
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But marmalade is tasty
If it's very thickly spread."
186
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The Queen said:
187
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Oh!
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And went to His Majesty:
189
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Talking of the butter
For the royal slice of bread,
190
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Many people think
That marmalade is nicer
191
00:11:35,487 --> 00:11:38,948
Would you like to try a little
Marmalade instead?
192
00:11:39,032 --> 00:11:40,325
The King said:
193
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-Bother!
-And then he said:
194
00:11:42,619 --> 00:11:44,120
Oh, deary me!
195
00:11:44,204 --> 00:11:47,040
-The King sobbed:
-Oh, deary me!
196
00:11:47,123 --> 00:11:49,584
TWIGGY:
And went back to bed
197
00:11:49,668 --> 00:11:51,670
-Nobody...
TWIGGY: He whimpered...
198
00:11:51,753 --> 00:11:53,838
Could call me a fussy man.
199
00:11:53,922 --> 00:11:57,342
I only want a little bit of butter
For my bread!
200
00:11:57,425 --> 00:12:00,387
TWIGGY: The Queen said:
-There, there!
201
00:12:00,470 --> 00:12:03,098
And then she went to the Dairymaid.
202
00:12:03,181 --> 00:12:05,558
The Dairymaid said, "There, there!"
203
00:12:05,642 --> 00:12:07,060
And went to the shed
204
00:12:07,143 --> 00:12:08,561
The cow said:
205
00:12:08,645 --> 00:12:10,230
Oh, there, there!
206
00:12:10,313 --> 00:12:12,357
I didn't really mean it
207
00:12:12,440 --> 00:12:17,696
Here's milk for his porringer,
And butter for his bread
208
00:12:21,199 --> 00:12:22,742
The Queen took the butter
209
00:12:22,826 --> 00:12:24,619
And brought it to His Majesty.
210
00:12:24,703 --> 00:12:26,871
-The King said:
-Butter, eh?
211
00:12:26,955 --> 00:12:28,873
TWIGGY:
And bounced out of bed
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00:12:28,957 --> 00:12:30,750
-Nobody...
TWIGGY: He said,
213
00:12:30,834 --> 00:12:33,128
As he kissed her tenderly...
214
00:12:33,211 --> 00:12:35,130
-Nobody...
TWIGGY: He said,
215
00:12:35,213 --> 00:12:37,799
As he slid down the banisters...
216
00:12:39,718 --> 00:12:41,720
Nobody, my darling,
217
00:12:41,803 --> 00:12:44,347
Could call me a fussy man,
218
00:12:44,431 --> 00:12:48,935
But I do like a little bit
Of butter to my bread!
219
00:12:58,820 --> 00:13:00,405
[MUPPETS CHATTERING]
220
00:13:00,488 --> 00:13:02,240
Wonderful!
221
00:13:03,867 --> 00:13:06,578
[BALLROOM DANCE MUSIC PLAYING]
222
00:13:11,875 --> 00:13:15,670
Oh, honey, at our wedding,
who's going to be the best man?
223
00:13:15,754 --> 00:13:19,341
-My brother.
-Oh, maybe I should marry him.
224
00:13:21,343 --> 00:13:24,054
Hey, you said I could lead this time.
225
00:13:24,137 --> 00:13:28,516
Okay, okay, but I thought you promised
to wear the pink taffeta.
226
00:13:28,600 --> 00:13:30,143
Eh, so I lied.
227
00:13:32,354 --> 00:13:36,566
What's the difference
between "immoral" and "illegal"?
228
00:13:36,649 --> 00:13:40,904
Well, "immoral" is, uh, doing bad things.
229
00:13:40,987 --> 00:13:43,782
"Ill eagle" is me with a tummy ache.
230
00:13:45,033 --> 00:13:46,409
I didn't write it.
231
00:13:49,162 --> 00:13:51,831
Thank you for letting me dance with you.
232
00:13:51,915 --> 00:13:56,795
-What did you say your name was?
-Mary Louise. One, two, three, dip.
233
00:13:56,878 --> 00:13:58,546
[KERMIT SCREAMS THEN THUDS]
234
00:14:00,256 --> 00:14:03,343
[SHOUTING] Yeah, so I've recorded
three record albums,
235
00:14:03,426 --> 00:14:07,180
and they're really great,
but they haven't sold.
236
00:14:07,263 --> 00:14:09,099
Uh, what do you sing? Rock?
237
00:14:09,182 --> 00:14:11,267
No. Lullabies.
238
00:14:13,144 --> 00:14:15,230
-One, two, three, dip.
-Aah!
239
00:14:15,313 --> 00:14:16,981
One, two, three, twirl.
240
00:14:17,065 --> 00:14:19,192
[SCREAMING]
241
00:14:20,235 --> 00:14:22,946
Oh! Cute. Cute dance step.
242
00:14:24,155 --> 00:14:26,408
[PLAYING CLASSICAL MUSIC]
243
00:16:32,283 --> 00:16:35,203
MACHINE:
Hello. I am Vendaface,
244
00:16:35,286 --> 00:16:39,958
the world's first fully automatic
psychiatric machine.
245
00:16:40,041 --> 00:16:42,711
Simply insert coin in slot,
246
00:16:42,794 --> 00:16:47,799
step up to machine,
and I will tell you what your problem is.
247
00:16:48,800 --> 00:16:50,927
Oh, yes, yes, yes.
248
00:16:53,179 --> 00:16:54,556
[COIN CLINKS]
249
00:16:54,639 --> 00:16:57,684
Please insert another coin.
250
00:16:59,811 --> 00:17:00,812
[COIN CLINKS]
251
00:17:00,895 --> 00:17:04,024
Please insert another coin.
252
00:17:06,818 --> 00:17:07,861
[COIN CLINKS]
253
00:17:07,944 --> 00:17:10,321
FOZZIE:
Okay, okay. Now, what is my problem?
254
00:17:10,405 --> 00:17:13,199
You are much too generous.
255
00:17:14,659 --> 00:17:16,453
[GROANS]
256
00:17:16,536 --> 00:17:19,080
What do you mean, much too generous?!
257
00:17:20,165 --> 00:17:23,960
You also have a rotten temper.
258
00:17:24,044 --> 00:17:25,378
[YELLS]
259
00:17:25,462 --> 00:17:26,629
Uh-oh!
260
00:17:26,713 --> 00:17:27,714
[YELLING]
261
00:17:29,424 --> 00:17:32,135
I think that was great.
Right, Statler? Sta--?
262
00:17:32,218 --> 00:17:34,137
Statler! You fell.
263
00:17:34,220 --> 00:17:37,724
No, my upper plate fell.
I jumped after it.
264
00:17:40,810 --> 00:17:41,853
[KERMIT GASPS]
265
00:17:41,936 --> 00:17:44,647
So you still don't believe us
about the phantom, huh, Kermit?
266
00:17:44,731 --> 00:17:49,277
Listen, Scooter, there are no such things
as ghosts or goblins or phantoms--
267
00:17:49,361 --> 00:17:50,403
[HILDA SCREAMS]
268
00:17:50,487 --> 00:17:55,241
-Oh, help! Help, somebody! Help!
-Hilda, what is it now?
269
00:17:55,325 --> 00:18:00,622
Kermit, I just saw
the most hideous, inhuman face.
270
00:18:00,705 --> 00:18:03,667
For a moment, I thought it was Gonzo.
271
00:18:03,750 --> 00:18:05,251
But that was me.
272
00:18:06,336 --> 00:18:11,049
Well, what are you doing
scaring an old lady half to death?
273
00:18:11,132 --> 00:18:13,718
Well, I was hiding from the phantom.
274
00:18:13,802 --> 00:18:15,178
See? See, Kermit?
275
00:18:15,261 --> 00:18:18,431
All I see are a bunch of Muppets
spreading mass hysteria.
276
00:18:18,515 --> 00:18:22,560
Now, there is no phantom.
That's final. Period. End of report!
277
00:18:22,644 --> 00:18:24,688
-Uh, Kermit? Kermit?
-What?
278
00:18:24,771 --> 00:18:31,319
What has a skull-like head,
fiery green eyes, and a torn cape?
279
00:18:31,403 --> 00:18:32,654
I don't know.
280
00:18:32,737 --> 00:18:37,075
I don't know either,
but it's right behind you!
281
00:18:37,158 --> 00:18:39,244
[ALL SCREAMING]
282
00:18:43,248 --> 00:18:45,834
Uh, you will notice
that I didn't fall for their joke.
283
00:18:45,917 --> 00:18:49,713
And if there is someone
or something behind me,
284
00:18:49,796 --> 00:18:52,340
there is a logical explanation for it.
285
00:18:52,424 --> 00:18:56,011
So I shall now turn around
and see what is going on.
286
00:18:57,554 --> 00:19:02,100
Uh, pardon me, sir. Is there a logical
explanation for your presence here?
287
00:19:02,183 --> 00:19:04,728
[LAUGHING MANIACALLY]
288
00:19:04,811 --> 00:19:06,062
[SNARLS]
289
00:19:07,022 --> 00:19:09,607
Apparently,
there is no logical explanation.
290
00:19:09,691 --> 00:19:11,776
[SCREAMING]
291
00:19:15,780 --> 00:19:18,158
NEWSCASTER:
Here is a Muppet news flash.
292
00:19:19,284 --> 00:19:20,869
Dateline, London.
293
00:19:20,952 --> 00:19:26,875
Mrs. Lola Thomas of that city has just
finished eating an entire diesel tractor.
294
00:19:26,958 --> 00:19:29,878
Tell me, Mrs. Thomas,
why did you do such a thing?
295
00:19:29,961 --> 00:19:33,131
Well, the doctor told me
I had an iron deficiency, you see,
296
00:19:33,214 --> 00:19:37,302
so I started on a couple of doorknobs
and the occasional typewriter.
297
00:19:37,385 --> 00:19:41,222
But there's nothing really quite like
a good bit of diesel tractor
298
00:19:41,306 --> 00:19:43,433
with your chips and peas, is there?
299
00:19:44,476 --> 00:19:48,271
What an extraordinary feat.
I mean, how was it done?
300
00:19:48,355 --> 00:19:51,733
Oh, medium rare or thereabouts.
301
00:19:53,360 --> 00:19:55,320
Is this lady making a fool of me?
302
00:19:56,696 --> 00:19:57,739
Oh.
303
00:19:58,990 --> 00:20:00,075
Mm.
304
00:20:05,538 --> 00:20:10,377
-She didn't make a fool of him.
-No. He managed it all by himself.
305
00:20:13,880 --> 00:20:15,298
[MURMURS INDISTINCTLY]
306
00:20:15,382 --> 00:20:16,966
Oh, here we go.
307
00:20:17,050 --> 00:20:19,219
[CREAKING]
308
00:20:23,139 --> 00:20:24,641
[STAMMERS]
309
00:20:24,724 --> 00:20:25,767
Nothing.
310
00:20:32,982 --> 00:20:34,275
[ROARS]
311
00:20:35,610 --> 00:20:39,823
-Uh, who are you?
-I am Uncle Deadly.
312
00:20:39,906 --> 00:20:44,327
Better known as
The Phantom of The Muppet Show.
313
00:20:44,411 --> 00:20:48,331
[STAMMERING] Yes, sir.
Well, Uncle, uh, Deadly uh, Phantom,
314
00:20:48,415 --> 00:20:49,708
whatever do you want?
315
00:20:49,791 --> 00:20:50,959
I mean, I'm just a frog.
316
00:20:51,042 --> 00:20:54,462
Just a little harmless, little helpless,
little harmless green frog.
317
00:20:54,546 --> 00:20:57,340
I never hurt a fly.
Well, maybe I ate a few as a kid, but...
318
00:20:57,424 --> 00:21:00,719
-Enough of your horrible little jokes!
-Yes, sir.
319
00:21:00,802 --> 00:21:04,222
-You Muppets have taken over my theater.
-Yes, sir.
320
00:21:04,305 --> 00:21:05,598
My home.
321
00:21:05,682 --> 00:21:10,186
Years ago, I was a great actor, a star.
322
00:21:10,270 --> 00:21:12,355
In this very theater,
323
00:21:12,439 --> 00:21:16,818
my Hamlet was acclaimed
as the greatest ever.
324
00:21:16,901 --> 00:21:21,448
-Yes, sir.
-And then I played my most difficult role.
325
00:21:21,531 --> 00:21:23,366
-Mm-hm.
-Othello.
326
00:21:23,450 --> 00:21:26,536
-Mm-hm.
-But opening night, I was killed.
327
00:21:26,619 --> 00:21:29,748
Oh, well, I'm very sorry to hear that.
Who killed you?
328
00:21:29,831 --> 00:21:32,125
-The critics.
-Ha, ha. Very--
329
00:21:32,208 --> 00:21:34,502
-Enough!
-Aah! Yes, sir.
330
00:21:34,586 --> 00:21:39,758
I swore I would never perform here again,
nor would anyone else.
331
00:21:39,841 --> 00:21:43,720
-No, sir.
-I will drive you all from this theater!
332
00:21:43,803 --> 00:21:47,849
Leave or be doomed!
333
00:21:50,602 --> 00:21:51,686
Which way do I exit?
334
00:21:51,770 --> 00:21:53,855
-There, right there.
-Thank you.
335
00:21:55,899 --> 00:22:01,780
Whew. "Leave or be doomed."
I don't think I like those options. Whew.
336
00:22:01,863 --> 00:22:05,533
Kermit. Oh, Kermit,
we have been looking for you.
337
00:22:05,617 --> 00:22:07,911
It was all a joke.
338
00:22:07,994 --> 00:22:11,164
Yeah, that's right, chief.
George was just trying to scare us.
339
00:22:11,247 --> 00:22:14,167
Yeah, he said he found an old mask
and cape in the cellar.
340
00:22:14,250 --> 00:22:16,294
-Can you imagine that?
-Ha-ha-ha.
341
00:22:16,378 --> 00:22:19,798
Yeah, I was just fooling around.
There ain't no phantom.
342
00:22:19,881 --> 00:22:22,801
I was just trying to scare everybody.
Ha-ha-ha.
343
00:22:22,884 --> 00:22:26,304
Oh. You certainly did.
If you do it again, you're out of a job.
344
00:22:26,388 --> 00:22:28,556
You scared me
out of about ten years' growth,
345
00:22:28,640 --> 00:22:30,767
and I can't afford to get any smaller.
346
00:22:30,850 --> 00:22:34,062
Leave or be doomed!
347
00:22:34,145 --> 00:22:37,273
Uh, George, um, if you're down here,
348
00:22:37,357 --> 00:22:39,150
uh, who's that up there?
349
00:22:39,234 --> 00:22:41,194
That must be...
350
00:22:41,277 --> 00:22:45,573
ALL:
The Phantom of The Muppet Show!
351
00:22:45,657 --> 00:22:48,493
[LAUGHING MANIACALLY]
352
00:22:48,576 --> 00:22:54,290
Well, that may have been one
of the greatest performances of my career.
353
00:22:58,044 --> 00:23:00,296
Our guest star tonight was born in London,
354
00:23:00,380 --> 00:23:04,926
but all you folks in Enid, Oklahoma,
better stand by to hear a soul sister.
355
00:23:05,010 --> 00:23:09,639
Ladies and gentlemen, the down-home sound
of the incomparable Twiggy!
356
00:23:12,934 --> 00:23:15,061
[BAND PLAYING COUNTRY MUSIC]
357
00:23:16,396 --> 00:23:19,691
♪ You've got a girl, you love her Sunday
Then you've got another on Monday ♪
358
00:23:19,774 --> 00:23:22,610
♪ That ain't nobody's business
But my own ♪
359
00:23:22,694 --> 00:23:24,696
♪ Sitting by the phone
Waiting for your call ♪
360
00:23:24,779 --> 00:23:26,406
♪ You're out somewhere having a ball ♪
361
00:23:26,489 --> 00:23:29,868
♪ That ain't nobody's business
But my own ♪
362
00:23:29,951 --> 00:23:33,121
ALL: ♪ Nobody's business
Nobody's business ♪
363
00:23:33,204 --> 00:23:35,665
♪ Ain't nobody's business
But my own ♪
364
00:23:36,916 --> 00:23:40,003
♪ Nobody's business
Nobody's business ♪
365
00:23:40,086 --> 00:23:42,964
♪ Ain't nobody's business
But my own ♪
366
00:23:43,048 --> 00:23:46,634
♪ All night long you're playing poker
Tell me, what's the name of that joker? ♪
367
00:23:46,718 --> 00:23:49,804
♪ That ain't nobody's business
But my own ♪
368
00:23:49,888 --> 00:23:53,308
♪ I come over and say, "Here I am"
And then I hear the back door slam ♪
369
00:23:53,391 --> 00:23:56,102
♪ That ain't nobody's business
But my own ♪
370
00:23:57,228 --> 00:24:00,273
ALL: ♪ Nobody's business
Nobody's business ♪
371
00:24:00,357 --> 00:24:02,734
♪ Ain't nobody's business
But my own ♪
372
00:24:04,110 --> 00:24:07,155
♪ Nobody's business
Nobody's business ♪
373
00:24:07,238 --> 00:24:10,283
♪ Ain't nobody's business
But my own ♪
374
00:24:10,367 --> 00:24:12,243
♪ You wear the prettiest ties
And collars ♪
375
00:24:12,327 --> 00:24:14,037
♪ Tell me
Where'd you get the dollars? ♪
376
00:24:14,120 --> 00:24:17,248
♪ That ain't nobody's business
But my own ♪
377
00:24:17,332 --> 00:24:20,669
♪ You always talk about settling down
When I bring the ring, you're not around ♪
378
00:24:20,752 --> 00:24:23,713
♪ Well, I'll be there
The next time that you call ♪
379
00:24:23,797 --> 00:24:25,632
♪ So let's not fuss
And let's not fight ♪
380
00:24:25,715 --> 00:24:27,509
♪ I'm sick and tired
Of saying good night ♪
381
00:24:27,592 --> 00:24:30,679
♪ Let's make up
And hold each other tight ♪
382
00:24:30,762 --> 00:24:34,182
♪ Love each other in all kinds of weather
Let's go into business together ♪
383
00:24:34,265 --> 00:24:36,643
♪ We could start a business
Of our own ♪
384
00:24:37,977 --> 00:24:40,939
ALL: ♪ Nobody's business
Nobody's business ♪
385
00:24:41,022 --> 00:24:43,525
♪ Ain't nobody's business
But our own ♪
386
00:24:44,609 --> 00:24:47,654
♪ Nobody's business
Nobody's business ♪
387
00:24:47,737 --> 00:24:54,703
♪ Ain't nobody's business
But our own ♪
388
00:24:54,786 --> 00:24:56,830
Yeehaw!
389
00:24:56,913 --> 00:24:59,040
[MUPPETS HOOTING]
390
00:25:00,291 --> 00:25:02,293
Okay, that about does it for another week,
391
00:25:02,377 --> 00:25:04,838
but I do wanna give
an extra-special warm thank you
392
00:25:04,921 --> 00:25:07,048
to our lovely and charming guest star--
393
00:25:07,132 --> 00:25:09,426
Oh, thank you so much.
394
00:25:10,677 --> 00:25:13,471
No, no, no, I mean Twiggy. Twiggy!
395
00:25:13,555 --> 00:25:15,098
[KERMIT CHEERS]
396
00:25:15,181 --> 00:25:16,474
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
397
00:25:16,558 --> 00:25:19,102
I really had a lovely time, Kermit.
398
00:25:19,185 --> 00:25:20,812
-I even liked him.
-Aw.
399
00:25:20,895 --> 00:25:25,108
-You like him, you can have him.
-Oh, well, not that much.
400
00:25:25,191 --> 00:25:29,487
I didn't think so. Hey, we'll see you all
next time on The Muppet Show!
401
00:25:29,571 --> 00:25:32,115
[ALL CHATTERING]
402
00:25:32,198 --> 00:25:34,325
[BAND PLAYING THEME MUSIC]
403
00:26:12,739 --> 00:26:15,450
Well, every week,
this show looks better to me.
404
00:26:15,533 --> 00:26:18,453
Every week, your eyesight gets worse.
31093
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