All language subtitles for Maiwenn Le Besco - Le bal des actrices.en

Not too stressed out?
Romeo, hurry up!

Which one?

I dunno.

Superman?

Spiderman?

Batman?

Batman, Spiderman and Flash Gordon?

So, which one?

I dunno. Those are for babies.

Would I dress you like a baby?

Why can't I wear an NTM t-shirt?

I told you, not for school.

- But my friends do.
- They do what they want.

Why do you wear one?

Why not an NTM t-shirt?

- School's not a fashion show.
- lt's so cute.

Wearing his dad's work...

Want a t-shirt for my movie?

Nobody's even seen your movie.

Have a nice day.

Choose anyone you please

And come join the dance

Don't miss your chance
As scene fades into scene

Look into these vast bowers

And pick some enticing flowers

They're the kind that exhale

A heady kind of scent

That let you experiment

With an intoxicating tale

It's the actresses' ball

Behind the scenes and all

Narcissistic, tragic, romantic

It's the actresses' ball
Behind the scenes and all

Comic, explosive, mystic, erotic

ALL ABOUT ACTRESSES

It's not just on movie screens

That they play their biggest scenes

In the panorama

Life sends you reeling

From behind my camera

They call all the shots

The focus is on their secrets

As long as the light

Softens their plight

Until a new scandal breaks

And the damage takes its toll

The actresses' ball

So what's it called?

I want to call it
The Actresses' Ball.

Why a ball?

I'll have scenes
where they talk about their dreams,

but as they sing and dance.

A little like in a musical comedy.

You doing a documentary
or a musical?

A documentary!

- A musical documentary?
- Right.

Remake your first fiilm as a musical.

- Get Cecile de France...
- Excuse me?

So you're not interested?

All you care about is money.
Money! Money!

You wanna produce a romantic comedy,
right? A Gallic ''Bridget Jones''

starring Audrey Tautou?

I'd love to.

- How original can you get!
- That's movies.

- You're sweet.
- You haven't got the balls.

Next time you go shopping,
buy yourself a pair of balls.

So it's just you alone
or with a crew?

- This is my crew.
- And no lights.

No. Fly on the wall.

Sure, you really have
to agree to being filmed

without makeup, right out of bed

in not very flattering situations.

I'm looking for authenticity...

Yeah, I get it.

No glamour or anything.

I have such a fixed image,
a little like an icon.

I want to communicate how I am,

I mean, someone simpler, who actually
leads a pretty humdrum life but...

Because I often suffer from being...

always a bit superior.

Actually l'm very simple.

You're an actress, aren't you?

I was.

I mean, I am, a little.

Yes, l'm an actress.

I don't want to talk about myself.

As much as we try
not to talk of ourselves,

we always do when we're in a movie.

We direct it, we imagine it,
we write it, we work on it.

We always talk about ourselves,
no matter what.

This time, I don't want to talk
about me and my neuroses.

It's the actresses l'm fiilming
that l'm interested in.

I really want to film their mystery,
film their self-doubts,

film...

the thirst for love actresses have
that is...

so amazing...

You think they need more love
than other women

- who aren't actresses?
- Oh, yes.

Then it's neurotic.

We don't become actresses
if we're not neurotic.

I completely agree with you.

Anyway, l'll try to film

the charm an actress has.

That charm appears

when a woman needs to be loved.

I think the charm comes through...

in a need for attention,
a need for love.

Did he eat well?

Sure, he's even asleep.

- Sorry.
- Know the time?

I spent the whole day with actresses.

- Okay.
- Hold on!

I start shooting soon.

I'll be fiilming actresses all over.
It may happen again.

So if you can tell Joey...

It's not up to me to talk to Joey.

That's your business.

I'm only here till 8 p.m.

I look after Romeo and that's all.

- And how do we manage Romeo?
- You manage.

My gig tomorrow is very important,
too.

She sells millions of albums.
We can't miss out on this.

But Karin Viard
sells millions of tickets.

Cut it out!
Who's Karin Viard?

And who's Diam's?

- Someone who sells records.
- Well, she sells movie tickets!

- So what?
- Okay.

- In your world.
- So music beats movies?

The day you bring home more bread
than me,

then maybe l'll become an actor.

Do your duo with Diam's for now.

- You're a pain!
- So are you.

Why are the concessions always mine?

Get off my back!

- You know actresses!
- Here we go!

Let's hear it.

- You know them up close.
- Please, don't.

And anyway...

You'll bust your balls with actresses

who just get on your tits.

- We shooting for real now?
- Yes.

Hi!

- My darling.
- How are you, Bertrand?

This is Maiwenn. She's doing a
documentary. She'll follow us today.

If it bothers you, tell her to stop.

Can we do this later?

- She can't hurt me?
- Nothing.

No horns?

She's heavier than you but harmless.

Okay, we're pals. Help!

I let go of her.

This is going to be trickier
than we thought.

You have to take...

Help! I'm not doing this.

You're the actress.

Don't worry.

I'm scared, too.

Oh, shit!

Bertrand, whenever you want.

- Everyone ready?
- Ready, Bertrand.

Speed!

No speed.

- What is it, soundman?
- Just a sec. A slight problem.

Take your time, fella.

80 people are waiting. No sweat.

The fiive nominations
for Best Sound are...

Ready, everyone.

- Scene 70A, take 2.
- Tracking!

Will you get off my back?

Can't you see l'm walking out on you?

I'm tired of your shitty life,
your milk-stinking cows,

and your common sense love.
I wasn't cut out to work.

I was made to have a guy with
lots of cash support me all year,

and not make me get up every morning
for this crappy work,

with my hands in the manure.

I want an easy life, understand?

I want money. I'm tired of dressing
like a tramp, like your mother.

Cut!

- Did you like that, Bertrand?
- It was good.

- We'll improve on it.
- Let's do it.

- How many takes do you usually do?
- Very few.

You might adopt the expression

of an unhappy woman.

Let's see what happens if you keep it
a little more bottled up.

This is a girl who wants to rebel

but doesn't really have the nerve.

It's almost a dream: ''lf I had
the nerve, l'd tell you this...''

I'm sick of your shitty life,
your stinking cows,

your love full of commiseration.

I'm not cut out to work.

I can't take it anymore.

Cut. Nice start. That was fine.

Isabelle Huppert once said,
''A good director

''is a director who's in love
with his actress

''but won't act it out.''

It's something directors
and actresses all know.

You have to be a little bit in love
with your actress.

At least during work hours.

Even more if possible. It's better.

You stick your finger in
so it doesn't spill?

You stick it up your ass.

To us!

Does everyone on a fiilm
really sleep around?

I never slept with Bertrand Blier,
but I sure would have liked to.

- Bouncy-bouncy in your room.
- Ever cheat on your husband?

Never!

Never in my life.

This isn't good for my skin.

I'll need a day of detox tomorrow.

It's 6 a.m.

I'm going to wake up Karin Viard
in the next room.

Who is it?

- Up. You have a train to catch.
- Being filmed like this!

It's not very pleasant.

See, l'm not stopping you
from filming.

The bathroom's on the other side.

I'll guide you.

I'm still drunk.

Damn!

Let me see you just a little
as you wake up.

No way. Get out of here!

I really want to make movies
in the United States...

It may sound trite, but I think
there are real openings for me there.

I'm not being pretentious
or arrogant,

but France is a bit too small
for me now.

Been there, done that.

I have a coach teaching me accents,
English,

American, lrish.

I'm also working
on the Cockney accent.

You know, Cockney.

- Something like that.
- Really?

Sure. I want to sell abroad.
I want power.

It's a good springboard
to the mega-budget movies

and blockbusters.

- That's my aim, I admit.
- Really?

Sure. I want to shoot in the U.S.

I want to have power there.
I think it's possible.

You'd move there
with husband and children?

Sure. I mean, we'd have to see.

My career is my passion.

It's what matters most in my life.

But after your children?

After my children.

But I won't sacrifiice my career
in any way.

- There's a huge line!
- lt's nothing.

Why didn't we reserve a taxi?

It's raining, too! What a drag!

I don't like to be in this position.

We could have called for a taxi.

I'm so sorry.

Isn't there a priority line
for cripples and pregnant women?

- You're not a cripple or pregnant.
- But l'm famous.

Excuse me, mister.

Would you mind if I go ahead of you?

I have a big appointment.

Sure, so do l.

He didn't recognize me.

Excuse me.

A trainee just called. Someone should
have picked you up but forgot.

Someone was supposed to pick me up.

It's all right. I fiinally took a bus.
I loved it.

We have to discuss it. I'd like you
to map out little bus routes for me.

I just loved taking the bus.
It was terrific.

Check out little bus rides
I can take.

- Think l'm a hot actress?
- Oh, you're hot.

I asked you a question.

Am I a better director than actress?

There's stuff I wish you'd do better.

Like what?

Like being present.

There's a little boy here
who would also enjoy that.

How's that for a role?

NATlONAL
DRAMA CONSERVATORY

What mattered was passing
the entrance competition,

not the conservatory.

What mattered was passing the test,
like when I was a kid.

I called my parents
from the post office next door.

And I said,
''l made the Conservatory.''

I think that's what I said.

It didn't mean much for them.

The Conservatory,
for provincial shoe-store owners,

didn't mean much.

This your fiirst time
in a classic play?

That's unusual.
A change from stand-up comedy.

It may seem unusual to you,
but I am an actress.

At Conservatory,
playing Moliere isn't unusual.

What's unusual is not having done it.

That's unusual.

That wasn't planned.

I wanted to be Annie Girardot,
I missed the boat.

I don't know who I am.
Fernand Raynaud? That's not it.

That's how the story goes.

Until now. But the story can change.

It can and will change,
because I want it to.

Hold on. I'm out of focus.

'''Twould be a sin to let you
make this match.''

''Be still, you viper!''

Sorry, let me stop you.

Sometimes, I hear too much...
I'd almost say, ''Muriel Robin.''

I need you to call me on that.

And at the same time,
you shouldn't... How can I put it...

Some actors do theater
when they should stay in television,

and they tell you:

''l'm doing this play
so people know who I really am.''

It drives me up the wall.

You are what I see of you,
what you give me.

''l speak for your own good.''

''Pray you, hold your tongue.''

- '''Tis love of you.''
- ''Spare me your affection.''

''l'll love you
despite your objection.''

''Stop interrupting!''
Louis de Funes-style...

''Be still!''

Don't tell me you're after a laugh
a line?

Don't be afraid ofwhat you can be.

Don't think: ''Since l'm a comic,
I shouldn't be funny.''

- We'll see how we can...
- The nature of the text.

Nature, if left alone,
climbs out of the chaos it fell into.

- '''Tis love of you.''
- ''Spare me your affection.''

''l'll love you
despite your objection.''

So, Jacques?

They're phases. It doesn't matter.

For chrissakes, when you're in front
of 5,000 people, you go for it!

Enough talk. We'll do the scene first
and talk later.

''You talk and talk,
l'm maddened by it.

''Once and for all,
I tell you, be quiet.''

''Very well.
But l'll be thinking hard.''

''Think all you please...''

Think of our situation. I'm getting
on your nerves. So go for it!

Shall we break here?

I like the tension here.

Let's talk things out.

- That's theater.
- I know what theater is.

Yes and no. I get the feeling
you haven't rehearsed in ages.

This is your family, not mine.
That's all.

I'm not in any family
since I invited you

to come do the play!
Anyway, enough is enough.

You come with your gimmicks and tics.
I don't understand you.

We're on different planets.

Mine's called Life, and it's a lot
more interesting than all your talk.

I never read much.
I don't have your culture.

I have no culture. I'm ignorant.
I accept my ignorance, dammit!

Cut the crap! That's not the problem.
I never said anything about culture!

Otherwise,
I would have picked someone who's...

Muriel Robin isn't culture!

Now I understand
why theater bores people shitless.

Then so long! See you around!
I'm keeping calm. I'm keeping calm!

And Maiwenn there with her so-called
documentary on actresses!

A documentary on actresses
isn't theater!

- lnteresting things were said here.
- So long!

It's like a talk show on TV.
You talk about your fucking navel.

She's great.
That stupid bitch could be brilliant.

Her and her ''Me! Me!'' routine!

I often have this dream,

A spectator stops the scene.

She climbs up on the stage

I'm no longer the rage.

I was lovely, brilliant, droll,

For me all hearts were astir,

She robbed me of my role,

The bouquets are for her.

When night turns to day,

This dream just fades away.

I often have this dream.

Before thousands in the dark,

An actress comes on stage.

I'm no longer the rage.

Where are you kids?

Happy birthday!

Speech! Speech!

Where's Mommy?

I don't know. But keep going.

She's on her way.

Cut the cake.

Where's Mommy?

She's coming. She's on her way.

She's coming. Okay?

Let's hear it for Romeo... Hip! Hip!

Hurray!

Happy birthday, honey. I forgot.

- You okay?
- You might have told me.

That it's your son's birthday?

You have to be told, too?
That's a good one.

We can call later.
One more try.

These things are horrible,
you'll see.

As soon as you lose a few ounces,
the lines deepen. It's horrible.

They're a bitch to light.
Guys will tell you that.

So you fill them in, here.

I haven't had it done yet.

Here l've had done a lot.

Usually stars do it,
but guys do it, too.

Give me some names?

No, I can't.

Benoit Magimel's not coming?
Just kidding.

Just kidding.

It's okay. It's okay.

Isn't that Botox?

This is hyaluronic acid.
It fills in the furrows.

The furrows.

Itworks nicely on you.
Itworks really well.

That's it, Marina.

What are these marks?

You're a bit stressed out.

So the skin reacts. It's normal.

I have things to do later.

It's awful. I look like...

They'll clear in two hours.

It leaves holes!

Not at all. Well, yes.

This bums me out.
I thought I was above it all,

that I took it with humor,
with irony.

''To hell with my looks!'' Here I am
spending a fortune on Botox!

And getting fiilmed doing it!

- Don't worry, Marina!
- It gets to me!

I can't stand my own contradictions!
What do I owe you?

Maybe we should work on your breasts
instead of your face.

We should think about your breasts.

Oh, shit!

- Can you put it on ''pause''?
- Off to a bad start.

Are my breasts sagging?

A little.

Not much. It's the light.

And you never told me?

She better stay off my case!

That's an awful thing to say.

My breasts don't sag. Liar!
When I straighten up, they don't.

Then everything's fiine.

You don't give a shit.

Yeah, but I love you anyway.

Get undressed.

Okay.

Oops! My fly.

There's work to do.

My producers don't think
you're right for the role.

So they've contacted
a couple of other actresses

who are better known,

more popular than you.

They're reading the script now.

Who are the other two?

What difference does it make
who the actresses are?

It doesn't.

But who?

There's Cecile de France.

- Marion Cotillard.
- I know her.

And there's you.

- But l'd like you to audition.
- Meaning?

You do auditions with everybody?

Notwith those actresses.

Okay.

What for?

I only know you
from your TV comedy skit show.

I want to see you in something else.
We'll do an audition.

That stuff
about the TV comedy skit show

is on the verge of tacky.

Like wondering if Poolevoorde
can act straight.

We're off to a bad start.

It's not a bad start, but it has
nothing to do with my life.

I fiind that...

I'm not interested in hearing
that kind of argument.

Oh, no?

It's all so trite.
What about you, what have you done?

- I made a short fiilm.
- A short...

But I really love actors.

Who does she think she is?

When I see stuff like this,
honestly...

When can I see you again?

I'll call you.

''l'll call you.

''Bye.''

If she bothered to check,
TV skit comedy isn't all l've done.

She's not being honest.

It's her problem if she pigeonholes
people. I find it humiliating.

She set up an appointment
just to say l'm no actress?

She think she's Pialat?

Just because he was a bully, you have
to bully people now? What is this?

She shouldn't talk to me like that.
If l'm no actress, why meet me?

Then I end up
having to justify myself.

''Well, l've done classical drama
and all.'' Fuck that!

On top of that...

I like...

I have an appointment
for an audition.

Audition? Oh, yes...

I'm a bit embarrassed, Marina.
I left you a message this morning.

I'm surprised to see you.
The message said not to come.

After I spoke to Catherine,

she decided not to do the audition.

I'm really sorry.

The last time she met with you,

you weren't in great shape, she said.

She found you a bit pale.

She mentioned blotches on your skin.

And especially,
she said you were touchy.

- That's it.
- Look, Marina...

Look, see you around, or whatever.

Don't get your back up, please.
Don't get upset.

You really have to keep
your ego out of this.

See how we're treated?

Luckily I have some ego left
to keep me going.

An ego helps you have self-respect.

Get off my back with
your actress egos! What a cliche!

Don't you have an ego?

How stupid can you get! Shit!

Why do I let them talk to me
like that? It's ridiculous!

I deserve better, l'm sorry!

What a bitch! Did she even ask
if I liked her lousy short?

She's fiinanced by ARTE
and dreams of TF1! She wants it all.

She wants to make blockbusters
that are art house, too.

She wants laughs, but...
She doesn't know what she wants!

She'll never make it.

The casting director was right.
Keep your ego out of it.

Whose side are you on?
Who are you filming? Me or not?

Put yourself in my shoes.
You an actress or not?

Go do a documentary on directors
and their casting woes.

What a mess!
That business in the 2nd district...

It's the same in our neighborhood.

What?

These are people who are French...

Frankly,
I think the current government

is making a total mess of things!

I agree with you, ma'am.

- My parents were Polish.
- And me...

They came to France in '49.

No, my father arrived in '21.

He got citizenship in '49.

I'll tell you, right now, Sarko...

is a real scumbag!
That's the word. Goodbye.

That puts things in perspective.

So much for your problems.

It's just a casting incident.
It's true.

And she's right.

You should interview him
about actresses.

He knows everything.

He styles all the famous actresses?

What do you want to know?

Any Hollywood actresses come here?

Sure. And I go there sometimes.

- To Hollywood? For a style?
- For a color job.

A round trip for a style
and a color job?

For instance,
I go for Kristin Scott Thomas.

I mean, the real Hollywood.
Isn't Scott Thomas medium-Hollywood?

That's mean. You don't realize.

- Like Julia Roberts, for instance.
- No, not Roberts.

Not Sharon Stone either.

Does Sharon Stone make movies?

Does she even have hair?

She has no hair.

Sharon Stone doesn't exist.
She's a hologram.

- A virtual actress.
- You bet.

But l've been to L.A.
for Penelope Cruz.

You color her hair?

Who has the biggest bush...
of hair in French movies?

Catherine Deneuve.

Really?

- l'm glad to hear that.
- Why glad?

Because I have a big bush

of hair.

It makes me feel less alone.

A lot of hair.

Catherine and me, united!

I hope...

I hope it goes all right.

Leaving without paying?

Leaving without paying?

She doesn't understand
the star system.

Be right there.

I thought it'd be fun, but it's not.

Why not?

You're a budding actress like me,
and you end up waiting on

directors you idolize

or actors you feel like kissing.

If I talk to them, it's the sack.

The sack?

- A waitress just got fiired for that.
- For what?

Giving her resume to Tarantino.

- Poor kid.
- She got fired.

I worked every bar in town.

The Hotel Costes is really the end.

If I get fiired I might as well do
betting bars.

My name is Karole Rocher. I'm 33.

Sensations and emotions.

I'm here to learn things
about myself.

Dig life and accept good vibes.

I'm excessive,

but l'm in treatment...

Excuse me again. Sorry...

Why's there a camera here?

I feel ashamed of my body,
because I just had a baby.

Sit off to the side.

Just don't fiilm her.
If you're not filmed, it's okay?

Or just from here up.

Intense grief.

Laughter.

Tears.

Oh shit.

I know it's not easy.
Just keep going.

Like dancers. Dancers never sit down.
Just keep going.

You lost your whole family
in an earthquake.

You laugh and cry the same way.

Intense grief.

What's intense grief?

No comments!

Don't get mad. We're in class.
I can ask questions and talk.

- No comments, thank you.
- We're not children.

Don't worry about being ridiculous.
Go all the way.

What's the point?

It reinforces and deepens
an actor's receptiveness.

- Meaning?
- It makes you more flexible.

Switch.

Switch.

Stop. What do you all notice?

Sure, it's funny.

It's funny when your animal urge
comes out and you don't expect it.

Sure, it's funny,
and you all have to accept it.

So what do you notice
about what he's doing?

You'll say, that's terrific!
There's a dog in you.

But that's too easy!

Do you feel like a dog now?

Karole dear, you're going through
a major negativity crisis.

It's ridiculous. It's too easy.

Screw his animal side.

It's ridiculous.
I can act like a monkey, too.

Didn't I do my exercise well?

Anyone can do it.
My mother acts like a pig.

My mother does a pig.
Please!

Do you know
what we sacrifice to be here?

You know what it costs us all?
You know what hopes we put in it?

We'll take back our 1 500 euros
and monkey around among ourselves.

- We'll outdo each other.
- Karole, that's enough!

''Yeah, you do a great pig!
You steal the show!''

Were you proud of her Cesar award?

Yes, we were very happy that night.

You were dressed like a whore.

What did he say?

He said I had... a nice dress on.

Our family is well assimilated
in France.

So I see.

My daughter went to university.

I have a business degree
and I worked in marketing.

Now you're an actress.

You know we don't like that.

Why talk like that
in front of my girlfriend?

I don't like you offending
our tradition.

Enough of the secrecy act.

We realized we had
the same boyfriend.

She's not with him anymore.
Neither am l.

It creates a bond.

Next time,

tell me when you invite
girlfriends like her.

She's not proper.
I don't like that at all.

Eat.

''Lightning avoids meals.''

- Eat.
- Leave me alone.

Acting in Vietnam
is a contemptible profession.

So what?

I won a Cesar.
What more do you want?

To hell with the Cesar!

We're a Vietnamese family.

Maiwenn, please stop fiilming!

When I was a little girl
I dreamed of screen celebrity

Playing in movies
In a non-stop picture show

My father and mother
Had no faith in me, though

But I would tell myself
'Gone with the wind I shall be. '

No, my parents
Don 't understand

No, my parents
Don 't understand

And then I grew up
With color and black & white

Cinecitta, Hollywood, Michele Morgan,

Neither Father nor Mother
Could ever be a fan

Ofmovies by Godard and Kazan

What are all these bellies?

I'm working on a part

where l'm pregnant.

How's it look?

Think I can keep it to practice with?

I don't know how to walk with one.
Can I keep it?

I can? I feel good in it.

All right.

I'll ask. Because it's rented.

Tell them the actress
has to practice.

All right.

When are you free next week?

Next week, Monday through Thursday.

I'm so glad!

What?

Nothing...

I can't... It makes me...

It's like a dream. It will happen.

But fiirst your have to dream,
don't you?

I don't know, Julie.

I think you do.
I think that...

it will happen to me.

- You should feel the stirrups.
- Relax your perineum.

Your perineum. Easy...

- Here it comes!
- The head's out.

Yuck! This is like
a Catherine Breillat movie.

Take a deep breath.

Hold it, push on the stirrups.

Push! He's wrapped up in his cord.

Now for the head.
He has his cord around his neck.

It's a boy.

Fernand de la Maze was the first...

Isn't it beautiful?

I've watched it a hundred times
and it always moves me.

Hold on.
Would you show me your apartment?

You know it.

It's for the documentary.

- Act as ifwe don't know each other.
- Think so?

- I introduce myself and all?
- Yes. ''My name is Julie...''

Hello, Maiwenn. My name is Julie.

- Not Maiwenn. ''My name is Julie.''
- Okay.

Hello, my name is Julie.
I'm an actress.

Let me show you my house.

That's a...

Oh, look. That's Cecilia.

- Is she a dwarf hen?
- You can see she's not a baby.

She's fully grown.
They don't reproduce.

What's this thing you have with hens,
the garden?

They lay an egg a day.
That's something.

I like productive things,
even if l'm not one myself.

Talk to me about how you take care
of your garden.

It takes a lot of fertilizer
and anti-slug pellets.

- Anti-slug?
- Otherwise they devour everything.

It's all gone overnight.

- Talk about your rabbits.
- What?

Your rabbits.

There you see Ginette and Raymond.

They had a little bunny.

It's a boy. I checked.

The worse I feel, the more
I decorate, the more flowers I wear.

When l'm really depressed,
l'm usually covered in flowers.

Now, l'm okay.

But you don't decorate
with pictures of yourself,

or put up movie posters.

For instance, you won Cesars
but we don't see them around.

But if you're proud of your work,
why not?

What's that mean? Proud as what?
Proud as a peacock?

It's not a feeling l'm interested in.

You can be proud of a child,

but modest,
so you don't show you're proud.

Pride is not a feeling l've ever had.

For myself... For someone you love...

Sometimes you can feel ashamed
for someone you love.

Are you really into it?
When you act, does it give you

the energy and love
you don't get elsewhere?

I don't doubt myself when I act.

But in real life, all the time.

Stop. Close.

On your bellies now.

Feel the abdominal breathing.

Don't do it, Julie.

Feel the good feeling inside.

Why embrace hopes

And dream futilely

Of thousands of breasts

Nursing thousands of babies.

What's the point of dreaming

Of water in the desert,

My vocabulary

Has no place for motherhood

In the movies, I'm so motherly

But for me, no happy...

Event.

Honestly, no shit.
I'd rather you see...

It makes me look narcissistic.

I don't like it.

There aren't too many.

That one's nice.

What are all those bags?

Gifts.

You're kidding!

Repeat it on camera?

These are all gifts
the name brand houses send me

to wear at premieres.

I can't wear everything.

You didn't even open them!

I have to. And write thank-you notes.

Sophie does that. I don't have time.

How long have you had these scripts?

- Two or three weeks.
- All these...

What's the matter?

You on a parmesan diet?
The fridge is full of parmesan.

Don't know that diet?

I'll show you three colors
for the cover and you choose.

Okay.

Honest, girls, I don't know.

I think it's the red.

I spent two hours yesterday.

I taped them to my wall.
I went out and came back.

Your color is red.
It's an immediate touch of class.

- Red it is.
- Great.

I don't go out. I take it easy.
I stay at home with friends.

A good book or a good DVD.

Not one of my films.

- I see that Maiwenn disagrees.
- What is it?

No, I don't go out.
I'm tired of all that stuff.

What's going on behind my back?

Do you exercise?

I do yoga.

It's new to me. I really enjoy it.

Which shakra did you open?

I opened...

The fiirst one.

I have a hard time with the second.

Let me jot that down.

I'm lost in the forest
of my feelings right now.

That's perfect for the role.

This girl's in the forest,
lost in her feelings.

You're a terrific actress...

You read that this girl's not well,
and immediately you're not well.

Yvan, I can't take it any more.
I can't.

I love to hear that.

That's precisely the character's
state of mind.

She's like this... She's like you.

- You're making fun of me.
- I am not.

You saying you're not doing well?

It's not the same problem.

I've been having real doubts
about my career lately.

What kind of doubts?

The desire's gone.
I can't walk on a set anymore.

That's when you should make a movie!

It's the best thing for a role.

We're talking about work.

In this state,
I might go into a depression.

Depression is great for the movie!

This girl is desperate.
We can shoot tomorrow.

- No.
- Why not?

I can't shoulder it right now.
I'm fragile.

Perfect!

You can't protect me the whole time.

I'll protect you.

I'll bring you salads,
zucchini, carrots,

asparagus, tuna fish,
whatever you want.

I no longer have the fire.

It's fiine that way.

- Everything all right?
- Fine, thank you.

Why not Charlotte?

I can work with other actresses.

- You work well together.
- Sure.

Okay, but we have two children.

It'd be nice if she stayed home a bit
and look after my kids for once.

Look, l'll be going. Okay?

Thanks for the green beans.

You're welcome.

Hold on, l'm absolutely serious.

She did a number on me.
''l'm so tired.'' She struck a pose.

She talks.
When I see you l'll imitate her.

The parody of a dumb actress
and her ego

who wants to quit, who wants to act,
who doesn't want to act, etc.

You bust your balls on a script
for an actress

and at the last minute
she tells you... whatever.

''l'm tired... The fiire's gone.''

She tells me stuff...
I kid you not...

A bunch of nonsense: ''The forest
of my feelings.'' She gives me poetry.

I didn't understand a thing.

She left me sitting there. She came,
ate two carrots and left.

I don't know.

I think I have an idea.

Finished?

- Not my pasta. I have a question.
- Yes?

Would you like to make a movie?

- That's funny.
- What?

Is that a come-on?

Let me talk.

I'm serious. I wrote a script.

You're just the part.

- You staying for the whole class?
- lt's almost over. I'll leave soon.

Stand where I can't see you.

I don't want
to make others uncomfortable.

I won't say, I won't say

It was the blues,
but it wouldn't quit

I won't say, I won 't say,

It was like working in a pit,
Running every which way

I couldn't take it,
I wouldn 't take it.

It was the bottom of the pool I hit

I was through, I was through

With swapping my jeans
for an evening gown

What's it to you if I do what I do?

Keep your pool at Costes
I'd rather watch Lost

Or only be a vanishing point.

Say bye-bye...

Brushes and charcoal

Is all I need

Take it from me,

Take it from me,

To be a pin-up beauty

Is not my duty.

- Melanie...
- Yeah, sorry.

- Talk to me.
- Well, nothing...

Just a void.

It's this stupid career that...

I let it swallow me.

It'll pass. Do you have your period?

I wish that was it.

Poor sweetie.

That's why I have to get away.

Holy shit!

Nice.

He'll hit me the face!

I met a really adorable family.
They took me into their home.

I sleep in the living room.
They made space for me.

I live with them, eat with them...

mostly just rice, but anyway...

It's incredible! I feel alive again.

No luxuries. It does me good

to be with real people.

No, really I don't need a thing.

Give your violence free rein.

Take pleasure in dominating him,
bringing him into submission,

Having him at your feet,
under your heel.

Go on, grovel! Ask me forgiveness.

Kiss my leg, my shin.

Work your way up.

Lick my knee.
Lick my knee, that's it.

- Okay, that's enough.
- Quiet, please.

What a joke!

We'll discuss it after the exercise.

There, ask forgiveness.

Take pleasure in submission.

Excuse me.

- Your turn's coming.
- l'd like to do it with you.

- With me?
- l'd like to.

You little slut!

You cow! You bitch!

I'm supposed to submit, is that it?
You supposed to be dominating me?

Okay.

If you're the least bit receptive...

Go ahead.

That's domination?
I'll keep that in mind.

Know what they call a failed actress?

What?

- A has-been.
- A Christine, they call her?

- And know what they call...
- Christine. Know what you are?

- They call your kind...
- You're twisted!

- A never-been!
- You're twisted!

Know what? You can't dominate anyone,
not even yourself!

Self-pity apart,
I know what it is to be dominated,

to be submissive,
to a situation or a person.

You're nothing.
You don't dominate anyone!

You break people,
you're breaking me!

You're turning me off studying!

You're turning me off,
turning all of us off acting!

You just humiliate us!
You're getting your rocks off.

Because your life is a failure!

For me it's six months' wages
and all my hope!

You're teaching us
frustration, bitterness!

- lt's scandalous!
- lt's your choice.

- I have no choice.
- Keep going or quit.

I had a choice before I enrolled.

Now that l've paid, I have no choice.

What does acting mean to you?

Give me three words I can use!

Three words that don't cost
1 500 euros. 1 500 for nothing!

Here they are:

Don't go into acting.

You know what?

- Don't go into acting.
- You're a success at domination.

You did it, you dominate all of us!

Let's see.

Pathetic!

I can't believe she adopted him.

The French Angelina Jolie!

''l felt like a mother on the spot.
It was like lightning striking.

''l hope I can give him
all the love he needs.''

Do the potatoes in the microwave

and feed them that
with grated cheese.

Can you pick up two veal cutlets
at the butcher's?

You have money left from last week?

Okay, lots of love.

You take magnesium?

You wicked girl!

Don't empty my freezer.

I'm just looking.
You're a Leader Price fan.

I don't shoot with Spielberg.

I'm not a James Bond girl either.

What are you taking?

Magnesium.

Why? You depressed?

Five roles,

two miscarriages, an abortion,
a breakup, a new romance,

two children to raise...
It's all a bit much.

That's life.

I have to hide the hard stuff.

Hang on. What if he comes back?

You just wait and see.

PENClL DlCK

What do you mean, tagged?

Tagged with black spray paint
on the hood.

- Your red Porsche?
- Yes, my red Porsche.

- What did they write?
- ''Dickhead.''

This means a whole new paint job.

Okay, quiet on the set.
Places, everyone.

Camera ready.

One last link shot.

The other day I said
you'd make a great weather girl.

It wasn't meant as an insult.

Here's what we'll do:
l'd like a card.

''Do you still love me?''

''Do you still love me?''

Cut! Cut!

It was lifeless, like a dead fiish.

Let's go.

''Do you still love me?''

''l'm not an easy man.''

''That's true.''

Good.

Cut! Thank you.
Let's do the next shot.

No, one more take.

But you have it.

I don't understand.
Film is expensive.

Why bother with another take?
You've got it all:

the lovesick look, Schubert...

We're at what take: 22, 23? 23...
I mean...

Shut up.
Let me talk for a change, okay!

You know, there's a point we get sick

of your stupid artsy-fartsy
directing.

This has gone on for three weeks
now... Let me talk!

To a pop tune, I say stop

I'd rather be called a slut

Then make myself sick

In your fucking pic

Sweep it away
Give me some air

With Francis Veber

Be a box office blitz
With Kassovitz

Sweep it away, give me air

Shift into action

In a movie by Luc Besson

I won 't start being
a better actress than I've been

Someone I'm not,
Just so you can preen

You highbrow phonies
Drive me ballistic

With you, three lines of dialogue
are just sadistic

Give me air, sweep it away.

Shift into action

Do Mr. Bean Meets Fassbinder

Don 't give me that crap

What's that? Luc Besson?
And Jean-Marc Barr...

Why not Jeanne Balibar?
This has gone too far...

Precisely:.

Why not Jeanne Balibar?

You fat dickhead!

Shit! Tie her down!

Sorry, but she's always underfoot.

Do something for me...

What d'you want?

Ice cream.

You already got creamed.
Haven't had enough?

You can be such a jerk.

I have my moments.

Is that all you can do is say,
who's to blame?

There you go
with your movie star hysterics!

You dream of being an actor
but you don't dare admit it.

Because your ego is so humongous

you won't admit you want to be an
actor. You're dying to be an actor.

JoeyStarr: lt's no accident

if that's your stage name.

What'd your mother call you?

Didier Morville!

Okay, to each his world. Later.

At 40, making teenagers go wild,

singing:
''Put your gun down''!

- Is that all?
- No, that's not all.

That's true, too.

The French music scene
was waiting for JoeyStarr!

You're just hurting yourself.

Nice. This at the Farm Fair?

That's Blier's movie, dimwit!

Who's producing it?

I dunno. Not you anyway.

It's good, but it needs a girl

with some glamour...

They're all glamorous, thank you.
Karin Viard, Melanie...

She's glamorous, but...

Someone more popular, you see.

Karin Viard is very popular.

Popular with who?

- Your colleagues?
- Come off it!

She makes popular movies.
And Julie Depardieu won two Cesars!

Popular is a girl who makes
the cover of Paris Match or Gala,

magazines that sell.

Hit on models, for instance,

who are doing movies.
There are good ones.

Take Estelle Lefebure.

She's no dope. Try to meet her.

Get off your ass. Call her.

To say what?
''Hi, Estelle, my name's Maiwenn.

''l'm doing a documentary
on actresses.

''You're no actress.
You sell face cream, but l'm game!''

What do you mean, no actress?

What's with this dumb
Parisian snobbery?

It's not snobbery. Excuse me,
but there's nothing more...

- It is too snobbery.
- How tacky can you get!

That's St. Tropez,

her boyfriend, what's his name...

Johnny Hallyday and that gang.
Come on!

What about my image?

What image?

Honestly, I have a trendy image.
The underground press...

I don't want to look ridiculous.

- Seen her movies?
- What movies?

She's done movies.

Name one fiilm she's done!

They escape me.

Ha-ha, they escape you!

If you take Estelle,
l'll produce you.

I'll pay you, l'll back you.

How much?

Actually, you're known
without being known.

That depends. I'm pretty well known.

But not as an actress.

I'm starting to be.

That's your point of view.

You're rather known as a top model,

or whosit's wife...

What I want is the viewpoint

of a woman

struggling to make a name
as an actress,

not a beauty product.

We're filming.

Can you take off your glasses?

Not today.

A documentary's not a commercial.

No, it sure isn't a commercial.

Do you think you're a good actress?

That would be presumptuous, but

I'll do everything I can to be one.

Give me a straight yes.
The point isn't to...

I'm working... at it.

It takes work to be an actress?

In any case
there's a lot of work to do.

It doesn't just come like that.

You don't care about your physique.

That's not true. I'm even very

vain, in my own way.

When people say actresses
can't get a role after a certain age,

they answer:

''Not true,
look at Charlotte Rampling!''

- Is that why you want to film me?
- Not at all.

It's amazing
you don't try to look younger.

Okay...

Beddy-bye. Enough.

You ate already?

Playing by yourself?

I got a little tired of it.

- Didn't you do the shopping?
- Did you?

Come take my boots off, please.

- Did you forget?
- What?

Dinner at Jennifer's.

I'm too beat to go out.

So am l. But we said we'd go,
so we're going.

You change your mind sometimes.

Sure, but sometimes
I can also change yours.

I'm too tired.

So, are we going?

Okay.

1 000 now, 1 000 later, if you behave.

How much is there?

2000 in all?

- You heard me.
- Okay.

I'm ready.

What?

They're not chicken thieves.
Go change.

Go on.

You're awful!

Melanie Doutey had...
Where'd I see that?

I heard
she had lots of plastic surgery.

Didn't she have her mouth redone?

Like, a friend of mine
told me she saw

Isabelle Adjani making out
with Edouard Baer.

I swear! I promise you!

Can you imagine?

Not giving your man a boner anymore?

Excuse me?

How's it feel not to give your man
a boner anymore?

It's been over a year.

You have a hidden camera?

I read her diary.

- What are you getting at?
- You laugh

about Adjani and all,
but not about yourselves.

It's too private? Same goes for them.

At the dentist's,
you grab the celebrity rags.

Like everyone else.
You the new Sofiia Coppola?

No, Miss Smartass Underground.

People like her work hard all day,

and reading that stuff,
it relaxes them

to see they have the same problems.

You're Miss Morality, very chic!

Everyone's not into your thing:
coming home

at night and watching
this heavy stuff on TV.

You know, the Dardenne brothers!
Screw 'em!

I watch Star Academy, a good comedy.

I'm like her. It doesn't say

''crooner'' up here.

This won't work.

I can't imagine having someone
underfoot all the time.

What's the point of filming me

reading or sleeping?

It'd be different
if I were playing a character.

Tell yourself you're playing
a character:

- Charlotte Rampling.
- That's not my thing.

Good luck, Maiwenn.

You okay?

- We'll talk at halftime?
- Sure.

It's 0-0.

They won!

They won!

So what'd that wacko say?

Who do you mean?

Ma Rampling.

She said no.

I used all the arguments I could,
nothing doing.

You try everything?

All right, come in.

Having more experience
doesn't mean you're right.

Maybe l'm not adventurous enough.

You want to get me involved?

You want to change me or what?

I want to reveal you to yourself.

Reveal me to myself?

You're always into deep things.

Culture, literature!

It doesn't exactly make me unhappy.

It doesn't exactly make you happy,
either.

I don't have your culture
or experience, that's for sure.

But I can give you my buoyancy
and joy of life.

Live again, yes,
I mean to live again.

Live again, live forever more.

I was once deeply loved
In a wordless love

A love that was my crown.

Live again, I mean to live again.

I sowed with tenderness

To reap my passion.

I never let happiness in the door
Without a thorough search.

Live again, I mean to live again.

What am I talking about?
What keeps moving inside me.

Live again, I mean to live again.

What am I talking about?
About what never stops: time.

Give time the time,
That's something you learn.

Let's give time the time
To tame it an instant.

Come on, you twinks. Let's do it.

Why don't you kiss Estelle?

- What?
- You don't understand?

Kiss her, not like a movie kiss,
but a real French kiss!

Everyone wants to kiss Estelle,
even Julie!

Even me.

Really?

Come on, let's go! Action!

I'll do it for you.

If you're doing it for me,
l'll do it myself.

Got any victory breath spray?

Go on, Estelle! You can do it.
And there's a producer watching.

There we go.

That's good!

With your tongues!

Estelle's good at it.

Holy shit!

To think you hesitated!

We wanted to see a kiss,
not foreplay.

You mind sitting down?

They won't let up!

Okay, that's enough!

- We're having fun.
- You're not at the movies.

Hey, relax.

I'll play with your head.

The best of all,

an extraordinary little detail:

this telephone unmasks
masked callers.

It's Martin Scorsese.

This way, thank you.

Thank you, gentlemen.

Here's to Nokia!

- These your shoes?
- What?

Those sequined shoes.
They're gorgeous!

Yeah, princess shoes.

The wardrobe's on loan.

Do the dresses belong to Romane?

On loan, too?

And you work for the telephone or...

The telephone and...

And you use actresses to sell phones?

It's common practice.

What's she paid?

I can't tell you.

- How much are you paid, Romane?
- None of your business.

She'll tell me anyway.

Wanna be in my film? Spit it out.

So that's how you buy actresses.
Charming!

The end of the myth.

People don't know
that everything is on loan.

What's this envelope?

Could you stop filming now?

We're almost done.

Miss, please stand aside
and stop fiilming.

Is it the mafiia or what?

This seems right.

For this, I was paid
about 20,000 euros.

Tell me what you've been doing.

What have you been up to
since I last saw you?

Last time you were on a roll.

Yes, but...

I met a Danish director.

Doing anything in France,
big movies like before?

No big movies...

But l'm auditioning next week
for a terrific movie.

Whose?

The Yvan Attal movie.

I think you're not alone.

I hear he's seeing lots of actresses.

Maybe, I don't know.

- Is that it?
- What?

- For your fiilm?
- Of course.

But don't expect it
to change your career.

I'm glad to be in it, it'll do me
good. There're lots of other girls.

Once, when my phone used to ring

It was always someone asking

If I'd be part of an art film cast

And roles I couldn't let pass.

There was no stopping me

I was shooting constantly

But now everything seems

Like I'm swimming upstream.

I've played 1 001 girls

I've peered into their souls

I gave them my youthful charms

Like you rush into a man 's arms

I thought I was a little kid

Who wanted to play and always did

And I played from fall to spring

Before I was nothing more

Than an actress as actresses are

But now the wheel has turned

And I feel forgotten and spurned.

How did it come to pass?

Have I lost my appeal and class?

The world was mine and grand

I held it in the palm of my hand

Show your profile.

This one?

Smile.

Face forward.

Let's see the expression

of a sad mother.

Other side, other profile.

Okay, that'll do for now.

I'll show them to him,

and if he wants to see you,
we'll call.

But...

Things aren't easy right now...

True, your agent insisted
that I see you.

No, wait! I'm fond of you
so it's normal.

But Yvan originally wanted
Melanie Doutey.

Now he wants an unknown.

It's crazy!

I audition, and people tell me:

''You're too well-known.''

At another audition, people tell me:

''You're not famous enough.''

Known, unknown...

It's not my fault.

Make up your minds.

I learned 5 pages of lines!

I told your agent
not to give them to you,

because I knew how things might go,

and didn't want to waste your time.

Someone unexpected?

An actress?

- You're used to it.
- But it might bother the actress.

It's grotesque as it is.

- I came for the audition.
- This way.

Go on!

What's the matter?

What's wrong?

What a lot of crap!

It's crap.

Stop it!

That was my only audition in months.

But you told me you had...

I don't have a thing.

Nothing!

You were waiting for calls.

Itwas bullshit, can't you tell?

That event you saw me do...

I do 10 a month

so people see my face
and think l'm fine.

If you look depressed,

people will say,
''She's depressed, we can't use her.''

You have to be pretty and act...
Iike in the closet,

act like nothing's the matter.

Then they say, ''She's really swell.''

But it doesn't matter,
there are worse things.

But this time was a little too much.

There goes Yvan.

He's going to the offiice.

This is it, kid!

If he auditions me...

You want to audition, too?

Sure you don'twant to?
Because while we're at it...

Can I film you a bit?

Yeah, but it's not...

- You're an actress, too?
- But l'm directing now.

''Now I know

''l want to be with you.

''l can manage even
without your daddy.

''l want you to forgive me.

''Please, forgive me, my love.''

You're great, bravo.

I'll be right there.

Not me. You're filming actresses.

Tell me the truth: How was she?

She was great.

- Will you take her?
- I don't know.

- Come on!
- I don't know.

Whether he takes me or not,

I'm so happy I was able to do that!

At least you'll be judged
by your work.

Goddam!

I can't believe it!

- This is Dinesh.
- I can't believe it!

Dinesh, this is Maiwenn.
She's my friend.

Say hello.

Isn't he exquisite?

- How old is he?
- A year and 4 months.

Look at this little darling.

- How are you doing?
- l'm doing okay.

Is your fiilm going well?

Your adoption threw us for a loop.

Had you been thinking about it?

I didn't think at all: I saw him,

I knew this was the one!

It's weird to be back.

You happy, too?
You feel my excitement?

We'll go to the market there.

That's the church.

That's the newsstand.

Is that Yvan's movie?

He cast Romane Bohringer?

Turn that off, please.

Melanie,

isn't that sort of a lesson to you?

A lesson in what?

No lessons, but look...

Remember that lunch.
You didn't give a shit.

No, Attal went about it all wrong.

He didn't make a pitch. He begged.

He buttered me up like a jerk.

Admit it...

you didn't make much of an effort.

We're so happy.

Yes, my love.

Say it again.

I'm very happy.

Children,

would you like a little brother
or sister?

I'd love one!

How sweet!

Don't cry, everything's fiine.

I waited for you all my life.

Estelle...

My love...

What's the matter?

You were out there! Flying high!

What?

You kept saying, ''Estelle, my love.''

What's with you?

I said Estelle?

Yes, you said,
''Estelle, my love. Estelle...''

That's enough.

Very funny.

So what was it?

I don't know. Maybe...

I think l'm under her spell.

Here we go!

What crap! Good night.

Honest.

What'd they do to you
when you were a kid?

I think about her all the time.

So let's hear it.

I want to see her all the time,
talk to her for hours...

She gets to me. She's so...

You saw this chick twice
in your life,

so cut it out!

That's enough. Remember you and me.

- Meaning?
- We fell in love right off.

You're in love?

Yeah, I think l'm in love.

Quit playing with my head! In love?

You got a screw loose?

She's a chick!

You're not in love with a chick!
Cut it out.

You can be both.

Oh, you can? Go on.

Go eat cunt,

because you're making
my head swim. Scram!

You can leave, you hit the jackpot!

Pack your bags.

- Kiss our son.
- And you, kiss her snatch.

I dream ofBiarritz
in the summer light

I watch the girls' skin change color.

I see the blue skies hold you tight.

And suddenly I'm in love with you.

I dream ofyou and me hand in hand...

I 'm not in love with you.

It was just an experience.

An experience?

Come on...

Your turn.

Don't be silly.

Why did you fall in love with Joey?

When I was doing my show,

JoeyStarr came to see me
at the theater.

He waited for me backstage.

I fell in love with him because

there was huge gap between

his reputation
and what he was really like.

A few years later I wanted to write.

I wanted to make a movie

about my father.

I talked to people about it,

everyone said I was crazy...

Oh shit!

that I didn 't have a producer,

that I first had to get it
financed...

That I was putting the cart
before the horse.

Right!

And...

Joey was the only person

who told me I wasn't crazy.

Who said, 'Go for it!

'You 're right. '

That's why I loved him.

That's why with him,

I had the feeling

it was my right to give up
being an actress,

and that's what got it all moving.

That's why I loved him.

I felt he understood me.

I felt he understood me.

Didier!

What is it?

What is it?

I'm sorry.

Maiwenn told us she was doing
a documentary on actresses,

not a documentary on Maiwenn.
She said

she didn't want to be in the film.

Charlotte,

frankly, you have

a few minutes in the fiilm,
and you're marvelous...

I really don't think...

It sucks!

We got sold this pitch:

''We'll fiilm
the real lives of actresses...''

There's one actress on screen,

if you can call her that...

Are you a professional wimp
or an amateur?

She wanted to come full circle,
finish her first film,

focus the fiilm more

on her own family relations

and I think it serves
the documentary.

It serves the box office!

1 5 actresses to sell the film!

Look, she cut me out
of her first film,

calls me back,
and now cuts me out again.

So she's a big fat slut.

But l'm glad she cut me,
because for her it's pathetic.

She's the one who'll suffer.

Seriously, it's good news
we were cut, really...

It's just her, her, her!

She's dishonest!

She's not even here.

Cut it out!

I told her things l'd never told
anyone, and what do we see...?

Karole, you wear me out.

Who do you think you are
to talk like that?

You're lucky to be in it.

When did you last make a movie?

So please, pipe down.

It'll help you out
being in this film.

What're you talking about?
Help me out how?

Help me out how?

That's it! I don't give a shit!

Let's go for a drink.

- l'm ashamed of it.
- I don't see why.

Ashamed of what?

We're lucky not to be in it.
Take our names off.

It's a piece of shit!

I've had it, understand!

And l'm ashamed to tell her
because she's my friend!

Look, let's go...

It leaves me cold.

A terrifying bore.

An abysmal bore.

I don't think the fiilm will come out.

I think we're looking

at a dozen lawsuits.

I think we're up shit creek.

Do you hear what I said?
You don't give a damn?

No, I don't give a damn.

Well, l'm off.

''For you,
June 1 5, 2002''

Explosion behind!

Look out, a giant spider!