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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,334 --> 00:00:01,694 Previously on "Reaper"... 2 00:00:01,951 --> 00:00:03,477 You're a carjacker. Are you carjacking me? 3 00:00:03,507 --> 00:00:04,898 I'm not a carjacker. I'm the devil. 4 00:00:04,931 --> 00:00:06,472 My parents sold my soul to the devil 5 00:00:06,502 --> 00:00:08,340 and I'm a bounty hunter for hell. 6 00:00:08,350 --> 00:00:09,708 - You didn't tell Andi? - No! I'm not gonna tell Andi. 7 00:00:09,738 --> 00:00:11,744 If she knows, she'll think I'm a freak. She'll never go out with me. 8 00:00:11,782 --> 00:00:13,076 Whatever man. 9 00:00:13,086 --> 00:00:15,302 She was all up in your grill piece, and you told her to take a hike. 10 00:00:15,338 --> 00:00:17,480 - And how am I supposed to capture him? - This will help-- 11 00:00:17,512 --> 00:00:19,911 A vessel, handcrafted in the bowels of perdition 12 00:00:20,227 --> 00:00:21,770 by the iniquitous and the vile. 13 00:00:22,035 --> 00:00:24,620 You put a soul in hell. How does that feel, huh? 14 00:00:24,879 --> 00:00:26,873 That's pure, unadulterated satisfaction. 15 00:00:27,146 --> 00:00:29,862 All the money and tail in the world can't compare. 16 00:01:08,795 --> 00:01:10,461 Mom? Dad? 17 00:01:10,747 --> 00:01:12,060 I need a ride! 18 00:01:17,507 --> 00:01:18,222 Thanks. 19 00:01:20,478 --> 00:01:21,841 That's 14 even. 20 00:01:22,937 --> 00:01:24,023 Ok. 21 00:01:28,255 --> 00:01:29,471 You being cute? 22 00:01:30,728 --> 00:01:33,330 Uh, no, I-- I swear the money was just in my hand... 23 00:01:34,866 --> 00:01:37,541 Along with my wallet. Um... 24 00:01:39,747 --> 00:01:40,771 Ben! 25 00:01:40,786 --> 00:01:42,292 Hey, would you-- hold on one second, ok? 26 00:01:42,328 --> 00:01:44,092 Ben! Ben, hey. 27 00:01:44,348 --> 00:01:46,742 Dude, I need some cash. Can I borrow some, uh... 28 00:01:47,007 --> 00:01:49,542 Some... Really? What are you d-- 29 00:01:49,788 --> 00:01:51,253 I know you can hear me! 30 00:01:53,258 --> 00:01:57,663 - What, just disappeared out of your hand? - Yeah, money, wallet, keys. 31 00:01:57,945 --> 00:01:59,943 - It was not a good morning. - Oh, wait. 32 00:02:00,327 --> 00:02:02,520 - Are these yours? - Where'd you find those? 33 00:02:02,816 --> 00:02:04,732 They were in my pocket like 20 minutes ago. 34 00:02:04,768 --> 00:02:06,363 I have no idea how it got there. 35 00:02:06,518 --> 00:02:08,362 I do. It's my devil power kicking in. 36 00:02:08,626 --> 00:02:11,163 Wait, to make stuff disappear? 37 00:02:11,438 --> 00:02:13,613 Yeah, it's supposed to point me in the direction of an escaped soul 38 00:02:13,645 --> 00:02:15,801 from hell so I can hunt them down and send them back. 39 00:02:15,837 --> 00:02:18,143 Hey, hey. Guys. Little help? 40 00:02:18,408 --> 00:02:19,902 It's the paint mixer rodeo. 41 00:02:20,218 --> 00:02:21,422 That's one angry looking bull. 42 00:02:21,457 --> 00:02:23,003 You sure you're ready for this? 43 00:02:24,625 --> 00:02:26,822 This is not my first time at the rodeo, son. 44 00:02:26,957 --> 00:02:29,410 - Clock ready. - Thank you, Ben. 45 00:02:29,848 --> 00:02:31,251 Guys, ready? 46 00:02:36,226 --> 00:02:37,523 Release the bull. 47 00:02:40,578 --> 00:02:41,870 Gravity my foot! 48 00:03:00,725 --> 00:03:02,473 Ow, not the crotch. Not the crotch. 49 00:03:05,725 --> 00:03:06,731 Sam... 50 00:03:09,997 --> 00:03:13,403 - I found your wallet. - That is awesome! 51 00:03:18,287 --> 00:03:23,031 Season 1 Episode 4 - Magic For www.forom.com 52 00:03:33,125 --> 00:03:35,861 - Hi, can I help you? - Yeah, how much is this? 53 00:03:36,116 --> 00:03:37,130 Um, let me see. 54 00:03:44,816 --> 00:03:46,660 I'll just ask someone else. 55 00:03:52,446 --> 00:03:54,303 - Was that you? - I just-- 56 00:03:54,678 --> 00:03:56,782 The devil's totally messing with my head. 57 00:03:57,256 --> 00:03:59,372 - You see that guy? - Yeah. 58 00:03:59,688 --> 00:04:02,262 I just had this really weird vision that he stabbed me. 59 00:04:02,298 --> 00:04:04,860 I just had this really weird cupcake, so I guess we're even. 60 00:04:04,898 --> 00:04:05,991 Uh, come on, let's go. 61 00:04:06,218 --> 00:04:07,292 Where are we going? 62 00:04:07,368 --> 00:04:09,730 New devil box arrived right in the middle of the back room. 63 00:04:09,766 --> 00:04:11,110 Scared the crap out of Ben. 64 00:04:11,335 --> 00:04:12,991 What about me? I just thought I got stabbed. 65 00:04:13,026 --> 00:04:14,461 - You know how scary that is? - Yeah, all right. 66 00:04:14,495 --> 00:04:16,733 Come on, here. Hop on. Let's go. 67 00:04:16,775 --> 00:04:18,612 Come on, piggyback. It'll cheer you up. Let's go. 68 00:04:18,657 --> 00:04:20,100 Come on! Come on! 69 00:04:20,505 --> 00:04:22,390 Eh...no. I'm good. 70 00:04:22,645 --> 00:04:24,571 Yeah, you're a little big for that now, aren't ya? 71 00:04:24,606 --> 00:04:25,643 Just so you know, 72 00:04:25,935 --> 00:04:28,230 I would have piggybacked you right back there. 73 00:04:30,995 --> 00:04:34,722 You know, we might as well just open it and get it over with. 74 00:04:38,917 --> 00:04:41,361 - Sam, your box was moving. - Yeah, yeah, I know. 75 00:04:41,577 --> 00:04:42,873 It sounds like it's alive. 76 00:04:43,136 --> 00:04:44,970 Like there's a little tiny demon monster 77 00:04:45,007 --> 00:04:46,802 trying to scratch its way out. That would be awesome. 78 00:04:46,837 --> 00:04:47,892 Can we open it? 79 00:04:48,186 --> 00:04:49,980 - Hey, guys. - Yeah, yeah, hi. 80 00:04:50,846 --> 00:04:53,162 What are you doing? You look guilty. 81 00:04:53,407 --> 00:04:55,313 - No guiltier than usual. - No, no. 82 00:04:55,648 --> 00:04:57,140 - What's going on? - I'm good. 83 00:04:57,238 --> 00:04:58,511 Listen, I need to talk to you. 84 00:04:58,546 --> 00:04:59,771 Yeah, yeah, let's-- Let's take a walk. 85 00:04:59,806 --> 00:05:01,002 - You wanna-- - Ok. Yeah, yeah. 86 00:05:01,038 --> 00:05:02,073 All right. 87 00:05:02,436 --> 00:05:06,612 University of Idaho, Flaming Lips concert, this weekend. 88 00:05:07,027 --> 00:05:08,432 Sounds great. You going? 89 00:05:08,725 --> 00:05:11,290 Yeah. My cousin's a student there, so he said he can get us tickets. 90 00:05:11,325 --> 00:05:12,471 What do you think? 91 00:05:12,877 --> 00:05:15,510 - Us, as in me? - Yeah! 92 00:05:15,745 --> 00:05:16,901 Oh, good, yeah. 93 00:05:17,167 --> 00:05:19,063 You know, all of us. Ben, Sock, Josie. 94 00:05:19,078 --> 00:05:20,470 I mean, it's a 7-hour drive, 95 00:05:20,676 --> 00:05:22,361 but we can just take turns at the wheel. 96 00:05:22,396 --> 00:05:24,322 I guess, you know, we need a place to spend the night. 97 00:05:24,355 --> 00:05:26,002 Um, Sock. Sock's uncle has a van. 98 00:05:26,248 --> 00:05:27,742 - We could crash there. - Perfect! 99 00:05:27,776 --> 00:05:28,781 - Yeah. - Ok, great. 100 00:05:29,075 --> 00:05:30,773 We'll just have a van slumber party then. 101 00:05:30,805 --> 00:05:33,263 Oh, but you should know... I snore. 102 00:05:33,518 --> 00:05:35,462 Extremely loud, like a 50-year-old man. 103 00:05:35,716 --> 00:05:37,152 Heh. Nice. 104 00:05:37,397 --> 00:05:38,902 It's really attractive. 105 00:05:39,185 --> 00:05:40,883 Well, I myself am a drooler, so... 106 00:05:41,068 --> 00:05:42,690 - Oh! Fantastic then. - Perfect. 107 00:05:43,546 --> 00:05:46,192 I mean, this is gonna be so much fun, right? 108 00:05:46,557 --> 00:05:48,850 I mean, just the 5 of us going away for the weekend. 109 00:05:48,885 --> 00:05:50,203 We'll have bed head together. 110 00:05:50,236 --> 00:05:51,970 - It's gonna be-- - My office now. 111 00:05:52,236 --> 00:05:53,992 And bring the morons. 112 00:06:00,177 --> 00:06:02,372 Ok. Can you tell me about this can of wasted paint? 113 00:06:02,406 --> 00:06:04,433 It's leaking onto your desk. 114 00:06:04,448 --> 00:06:09,600 I found 6 others just like it in the dumpster. 115 00:06:09,848 --> 00:06:12,292 Seems the rodeo is back in town. 116 00:06:12,367 --> 00:06:14,493 What can I say, Ted? You can't fence this cowboy in. 117 00:06:14,527 --> 00:06:15,691 Well, congratulations. 118 00:06:16,006 --> 00:06:18,002 You have just incurred the wrath of Ted. 119 00:06:18,015 --> 00:06:19,133 Hold on a second. 120 00:06:19,385 --> 00:06:20,872 I wasn't even there. Why am I being punished? 121 00:06:20,908 --> 00:06:23,082 Because, Andi, if you're not part of the solution, 122 00:06:23,116 --> 00:06:25,012 then you're part of the problem. 123 00:06:25,308 --> 00:06:28,152 There will be no more talking of a social nature at work. 124 00:06:28,606 --> 00:06:30,002 Any of you. 125 00:06:30,248 --> 00:06:33,063 - Hold on. Why? - Why, Sam? 126 00:06:33,317 --> 00:06:36,541 Because the Work Bench is my world, 127 00:06:36,748 --> 00:06:39,601 and I will not let your chaos destroy my world. 128 00:06:39,847 --> 00:06:42,043 So that means there will be no more talking, 129 00:06:42,115 --> 00:06:45,240 chit-chatting, and/or yarn spinning. 130 00:06:45,515 --> 00:06:48,123 I'm sorry, Ted. I'm not feelin' this plan. What else you got? 131 00:06:48,158 --> 00:06:50,512 Oh, I got weekend shifts, 132 00:06:50,768 --> 00:06:53,182 night shifts, holiday hours. 133 00:06:53,456 --> 00:06:56,812 I have the power to destroy your social lives 134 00:06:57,088 --> 00:06:58,881 until you beg me... 135 00:07:00,398 --> 00:07:02,053 To fire you. 136 00:07:02,567 --> 00:07:04,563 So good day, sir. 137 00:07:05,367 --> 00:07:07,031 You know what, Sam? 138 00:07:07,045 --> 00:07:10,933 I think that I am outraged right now. 139 00:07:11,227 --> 00:07:13,671 Good to know, yeah. Can you help me, please? 140 00:07:14,318 --> 00:07:16,352 I ca--I can't, Sam. 141 00:07:16,645 --> 00:07:18,192 I'm too disgruntled, all right? 142 00:07:18,385 --> 00:07:21,493 I mean, give me a break. No talking at work? 143 00:07:21,506 --> 00:07:24,490 I mean, what's next? Take away the air that I breathe? 144 00:07:24,792 --> 00:07:27,491 Take away the beer that I'm about to drink on my break? 145 00:07:27,527 --> 00:07:29,400 - Come on. - What? You got beer? 146 00:07:29,685 --> 00:07:31,500 Where'd you get beer? I actually hit the 147 00:07:31,539 --> 00:07:33,501 diet iced tea button the vending machine, 148 00:07:33,537 --> 00:07:36,030 and this just came out. I think maybe it's a sign. 149 00:07:36,265 --> 00:07:37,960 Want half? Yes, I want half. 150 00:07:38,008 --> 00:07:39,530 Yeah? I love you right now. 151 00:07:39,585 --> 00:07:40,871 Have a seat, bro. 152 00:07:41,125 --> 00:07:42,792 You know what? Don't worry about it, man. 153 00:07:42,828 --> 00:07:44,701 It'll all blow over it's Ted. It's a cycle. 154 00:07:44,737 --> 00:07:46,351 - He always does this. - I'm not like you, man. 155 00:07:46,388 --> 00:07:48,140 I can't just sit back and let Ted walk all over me. 156 00:07:48,175 --> 00:07:50,521 I don't--what? I don't let Ted walk all over me. 157 00:07:50,555 --> 00:07:52,520 - What are you talking about? - Sure, you do. And it's ok 158 00:07:52,556 --> 00:07:54,252 because beta males are in right now. 159 00:07:54,288 --> 00:07:56,682 Ok? Chicks dig it. Good to know. Good to know. 160 00:07:57,137 --> 00:07:59,950 I refuse to accept Ted's power over me. 161 00:08:00,235 --> 00:08:01,832 We have rights, ok? 162 00:08:02,126 --> 00:08:04,070 We are not machines. We are not robots. 163 00:08:04,395 --> 00:08:07,032 Be cooler if we were robots. 164 00:08:08,435 --> 00:08:10,862 - You know who I'd be if I was a robot? - Who? 165 00:08:11,146 --> 00:08:12,752 The hot chick from Terminator 3. 166 00:08:13,206 --> 00:08:15,722 First I would tear this building down brick by brick, 167 00:08:15,758 --> 00:08:17,491 then I would go home, lock myself in the bathroom, 168 00:08:17,525 --> 00:08:19,643 and stare at my boobs for as long as I wanted. 169 00:08:19,675 --> 00:08:21,022 Which would be a long time. 170 00:08:21,257 --> 00:08:23,120 And then Ted would have no power over you. 171 00:08:23,157 --> 00:08:24,401 Testify. 172 00:08:35,927 --> 00:08:37,391 Oh, Sam. 173 00:08:37,407 --> 00:08:39,621 Life's too short to drink domestic. 174 00:08:39,885 --> 00:08:41,662 - What's that? - What? 175 00:08:43,798 --> 00:08:46,133 I could go for one of these apples. You? 176 00:08:47,395 --> 00:08:49,323 What the hell happened here? 177 00:08:54,948 --> 00:08:56,631 Oh--oh, my god. We-- 178 00:08:57,545 --> 00:08:58,991 We need to call an ambulance. 179 00:08:59,177 --> 00:09:00,751 No, Sam. It's ok. 180 00:09:01,008 --> 00:09:02,900 There's no point. He's dead already. 181 00:09:03,447 --> 00:09:05,121 You know, one day you're coming home, 182 00:09:05,156 --> 00:09:06,853 happy as a clam, and then boom, 183 00:09:07,157 --> 00:09:08,762 you're gone. 184 00:09:09,397 --> 00:09:10,960 That's the way life is Sam. 185 00:09:11,455 --> 00:09:13,433 You've got to eat your apples while you can. 186 00:09:13,468 --> 00:09:15,660 So, let me guess, an escaped soul from hell did this. 187 00:09:15,697 --> 00:09:16,693 That's very good. 188 00:09:16,705 --> 00:09:18,501 You're starting to catch on to this. 189 00:09:18,546 --> 00:09:20,391 But you know what the funny thing is? 190 00:09:20,476 --> 00:09:23,471 The coroner's gonna blame this guy's death on the car crash. 191 00:09:23,496 --> 00:09:25,063 The truth? 192 00:09:25,995 --> 00:09:28,392 This fellow died while the car was still moving. 193 00:09:28,636 --> 00:09:30,113 How? 194 00:09:30,365 --> 00:09:31,771 Who knows? 195 00:09:32,077 --> 00:09:34,680 It's like... magic. 196 00:09:35,687 --> 00:09:37,490 Ok, so where's the soul? 197 00:09:37,778 --> 00:09:39,353 I'm not Google, Sam. 198 00:09:39,367 --> 00:09:40,940 Well, don't you have minions down in hell 199 00:09:40,977 --> 00:09:42,741 keep track of these things, like who's escaped recently? 200 00:09:42,785 --> 00:09:44,530 I don't know how it works. Come on. 201 00:09:44,608 --> 00:09:46,392 Minions. You know who works for me in my central office? 202 00:09:46,425 --> 00:09:47,693 White-collar criminals. 203 00:09:47,946 --> 00:09:49,692 They hate me. They hate their jobs. 204 00:09:49,865 --> 00:09:51,911 I'm lucky if I get coffee in the morning. 205 00:09:54,245 --> 00:09:55,791 Oh... ok. 206 00:09:56,148 --> 00:09:57,782 I'll help you. 207 00:09:58,156 --> 00:09:59,790 I remember the file. 208 00:10:00,098 --> 00:10:02,971 In life, the soul's name was Bellifiore. 209 00:10:04,328 --> 00:10:05,503 That's it? 210 00:10:05,815 --> 00:10:07,493 That--that's not gonna help me find him now. 211 00:10:07,547 --> 00:10:08,853 This could take forever. 212 00:10:09,146 --> 00:10:11,643 Well, since when are you in such a hurry to catch souls for me? 213 00:10:11,678 --> 00:10:13,812 Because I--I care about these people. 214 00:10:14,048 --> 00:10:15,332 I mean, look at this guy. 215 00:10:15,647 --> 00:10:18,031 Are you sure it's not because you have some other plans? 216 00:10:18,068 --> 00:10:19,403 Plans to... 217 00:10:19,698 --> 00:10:21,862 lock lips with somebody? 218 00:10:22,098 --> 00:10:23,440 Flaming Lips? 219 00:10:23,746 --> 00:10:25,502 Look, look, I just-- 220 00:10:25,778 --> 00:10:27,590 The concert isn't until this weekend, ok? 221 00:10:27,625 --> 00:10:30,023 And I just--I figured if I could take the soul down fast, 222 00:10:30,058 --> 00:10:31,512 then I could still go, you know? 223 00:10:31,546 --> 00:10:33,441 A little vacation for a job well done. 224 00:10:34,077 --> 00:10:36,210 Well, here's the thing about that, Sammy. 225 00:10:36,527 --> 00:10:39,123 When your parents signed the contract for your soul, 226 00:10:39,226 --> 00:10:41,402 they didn't think to ask about vacation days, 227 00:10:41,437 --> 00:10:43,293 - so you don't get them. - So that's it? 228 00:10:43,326 --> 00:10:44,772 I work for you for the rest of my life? 229 00:10:44,808 --> 00:10:45,852 No vacation, nothing? 230 00:10:46,095 --> 00:10:47,291 Yeah. 231 00:10:47,578 --> 00:10:49,302 And I'm afraid I won't budge on this. 232 00:10:49,338 --> 00:10:51,952 - Sets a bad precedent. - God, you sound like Ted. 233 00:10:52,215 --> 00:10:54,423 Ohh, that was harsh. 234 00:10:54,716 --> 00:10:56,322 Ted is a real douche bag. 235 00:10:56,556 --> 00:10:58,141 Yeah, well, the truth hurts. 236 00:10:58,436 --> 00:11:00,072 You push me around, you know. 237 00:11:00,355 --> 00:11:02,230 You make up these totally arbitrary rules 238 00:11:02,266 --> 00:11:04,653 and expect me to just be your little robot? 239 00:11:04,938 --> 00:11:06,480 No! I'm sorry, ok? 240 00:11:06,746 --> 00:11:08,702 I refuse to accept your power over me, all right? 241 00:11:08,737 --> 00:11:10,293 I'm not your machine. 242 00:11:29,675 --> 00:11:31,581 I trust I've made my point. 243 00:11:32,806 --> 00:11:34,101 Loud and clear. 244 00:11:45,316 --> 00:11:46,840 What is in that thing? 245 00:11:47,158 --> 00:11:49,050 Whatever it is, it was forged in hell. 246 00:11:49,638 --> 00:11:52,620 Sock, you really think that's gonna help you slow it down? 247 00:11:52,847 --> 00:11:54,391 - Ben, you want to trade? - No. 248 00:11:56,416 --> 00:11:57,032 Ok. 249 00:11:59,207 --> 00:12:01,302 - I'm going in. - All right, get it. 250 00:12:02,068 --> 00:12:03,803 - I'm going in. - Nice and easy. 251 00:12:04,038 --> 00:12:06,320 - I'm gonna do it. - Nice and easy. 252 00:12:22,438 --> 00:12:23,591 He's cute! 253 00:12:27,468 --> 00:12:28,570 Pretty bird. 254 00:12:28,867 --> 00:12:30,511 All right, so we have the vessel, 255 00:12:30,766 --> 00:12:34,512 but all we know about the soul is that his name was Bellifiore... 256 00:12:35,178 --> 00:12:36,580 When he was alive. Ok. 257 00:12:37,395 --> 00:12:39,281 812 hits? 258 00:12:39,546 --> 00:12:41,522 All right, we gotta narrow this down a little. 259 00:12:41,557 --> 00:12:44,102 - How? - Bellifiore, soul. 260 00:12:45,395 --> 00:12:48,862 Nope. Ok. Bellifiore, evil. 261 00:12:48,876 --> 00:12:51,092 - Plus - Evil. Sock... 262 00:12:52,548 --> 00:12:54,040 Now the mouse has disappeared! 263 00:12:54,245 --> 00:12:56,943 I swear, the devil doesn't even want me to solve this. 264 00:12:57,048 --> 00:12:58,943 - Guys? - Sam? 265 00:12:59,268 --> 00:13:01,320 Do I hear unauthorized chit-chat? 266 00:13:03,565 --> 00:13:05,810 What, are you talking to yourself again, Sam? 267 00:13:06,898 --> 00:13:09,670 That is a sad, sad state of affairs, my friend. 268 00:13:10,578 --> 00:13:12,203 Because no one answers. 269 00:13:12,497 --> 00:13:13,763 Ever. 270 00:13:17,065 --> 00:13:18,451 As you were. 271 00:13:21,748 --> 00:13:23,791 God, I thought you guys disappeared, too. 272 00:13:25,398 --> 00:13:27,270 This power's stupid, Sam. 273 00:13:27,666 --> 00:13:30,332 If making things disappear is supposed to be a clue, 274 00:13:30,605 --> 00:13:31,802 I don't get it. 275 00:13:32,085 --> 00:13:33,422 Wait, wait, that's good! 276 00:13:33,708 --> 00:13:35,033 Disappear. Hold on. 277 00:13:35,348 --> 00:13:40,300 - Bellifiore, disappear. - Yes! All right. Good job. 278 00:13:40,606 --> 00:13:42,910 Enrico Bellifiore was a magician in the 1920s. 279 00:13:43,195 --> 00:13:44,382 Never head of him. 280 00:13:44,718 --> 00:13:47,713 He's featured on a documentary DVD Dark Side of Magic. 281 00:13:47,988 --> 00:13:50,781 Let's find that. Maybe... Come on. 282 00:13:51,226 --> 00:13:53,023 There's 2 copies in store right now. 283 00:13:53,188 --> 00:13:55,580 Mm. God bless you, Work Bench. You have everything. 284 00:13:55,617 --> 00:13:56,792 Awesome. 285 00:14:01,657 --> 00:14:03,383 How much for the flat screen? 286 00:14:03,715 --> 00:14:05,521 Uh, a million dollars. Try best buy. 287 00:14:06,918 --> 00:14:09,251 Dateline 1929. 288 00:14:09,345 --> 00:14:11,663 Former stage magician Enrico Bellifiore 289 00:14:11,998 --> 00:14:13,962 walks the last mile for murder. 290 00:14:13,976 --> 00:14:16,803 A young waiter with dreams of becoming the next Houdini, 291 00:14:16,848 --> 00:14:20,790 Bellifiore traded in his breadsticks for magic tricks. 292 00:14:20,857 --> 00:14:25,213 The unadoring masses felt Bellifiore needed to sharpen his skills. 293 00:14:25,488 --> 00:14:27,262 What? I saw wires. Did you guys see wires? 294 00:14:27,296 --> 00:14:28,571 And so did the theater, 295 00:14:28,866 --> 00:14:31,361 so Bellifiore took one last stab at fame, 296 00:14:31,688 --> 00:14:34,480 and the crowds lined up to see this malevolent magician 297 00:14:34,736 --> 00:14:37,782 perform his final rope trick. 298 00:14:38,067 --> 00:14:41,373 And this has been another edition of movie-vue news. 299 00:14:41,655 --> 00:14:43,762 - Ok. All right. - That's news with a view! 300 00:14:43,796 --> 00:14:45,542 Now we know who Bellifiore was when he was alive. 301 00:14:45,577 --> 00:14:47,193 We just need to figure out where he is now. 302 00:14:47,225 --> 00:14:49,240 Sam Oliver for carry out, register 2. 303 00:14:49,615 --> 00:14:52,023 - Sam Oliver, register 2. - That's Andi. 304 00:14:52,248 --> 00:14:53,723 You gonna tell her you can't go to the concert? 305 00:14:53,756 --> 00:14:56,700 Don't really have a choice. The devil made it pretty clear. 306 00:14:56,975 --> 00:15:00,720 - I need to talk to you about the concert. - Oh, yeah. I... 307 00:15:01,005 --> 00:15:02,633 I could only get 2 tickets. 308 00:15:03,185 --> 00:15:05,922 Oh, well, then just-- uh, maybe go with Josie. 309 00:15:06,206 --> 00:15:09,250 Well, I mean, in all fairness, I did ask you first. 310 00:15:10,056 --> 00:15:12,080 You're--wait, yeah. 311 00:15:12,317 --> 00:15:15,452 - But, what, so just you and me together? - Yeah. 312 00:15:15,728 --> 00:15:16,971 What's the big deal? 313 00:15:18,445 --> 00:15:20,253 Well, where would-- 314 00:15:20,546 --> 00:15:22,562 - Where would we sleep? - My car. 315 00:15:22,856 --> 00:15:24,450 It'll be tight, but... 316 00:15:24,927 --> 00:15:26,721 Well, I mean, if you're not up for it, 317 00:15:26,757 --> 00:15:28,203 then I completely understand. 318 00:15:28,237 --> 00:15:30,241 No, no, no! I'm up for it! I'm completely up for it. 319 00:15:30,275 --> 00:15:32,131 Very, very up. I-- 320 00:15:32,348 --> 00:15:35,130 - Well, great. - All right, yeah. That sounds great. 321 00:15:37,215 --> 00:15:40,193 - Oh. You got it from here? - Oh. Yes, yes. 322 00:15:40,808 --> 00:15:43,142 - Sam! - Sorry. I got it. I got it. 323 00:15:46,948 --> 00:15:49,100 Nora, don't throw food. 324 00:15:51,398 --> 00:15:53,783 It's ok. It--it happens. 325 00:15:55,998 --> 00:15:57,471 Uh... excuse me, ma'am. Where-- 326 00:15:57,508 --> 00:15:59,571 Where did you find all these apples? 327 00:16:00,418 --> 00:16:01,820 I'm confused. 328 00:16:02,098 --> 00:16:04,790 You and Andi are going to the concert alone overnight. 329 00:16:04,926 --> 00:16:06,140 That's right. 330 00:16:06,218 --> 00:16:08,693 Well, what about the devil saying no vacation time? 331 00:16:08,725 --> 00:16:11,371 Ben, we're talking about me and Andi alone overnight. 332 00:16:11,476 --> 00:16:13,371 Come on, this is my shot. I have to take it. 333 00:16:13,405 --> 00:16:15,180 Ok, but what about the devil? 334 00:16:15,455 --> 00:16:18,173 I'm choosing to not think about that right now. 335 00:16:18,347 --> 00:16:19,470 Oh, really. 336 00:16:19,995 --> 00:16:21,760 Hey, look at that sword. 337 00:16:21,997 --> 00:16:23,403 That's got to be our guy. 338 00:16:24,258 --> 00:16:26,420 You know, maybe if we catch him fast, 339 00:16:26,475 --> 00:16:28,271 the devil might let me go to the concert with Andi. 340 00:16:28,306 --> 00:16:29,921 Yeah, 'cause he's a real peach like that. 341 00:16:29,956 --> 00:16:32,773 So then we point the birdcage at the soul and open the door. 342 00:16:32,808 --> 00:16:34,951 I guess. Not like there's any moving parts. 343 00:16:35,095 --> 00:16:37,491 - When does the bird come in? - Maybe he's bait. 344 00:16:37,655 --> 00:16:40,051 Wait, I'm sorry, bait? Nobody's hurting Winston. 345 00:16:40,297 --> 00:16:42,611 Who's Winston? The bird. 346 00:16:42,958 --> 00:16:45,142 You named the vessel? 347 00:16:46,017 --> 00:16:48,633 Dude, Winston is not a bird's name, Ben. 348 00:16:48,935 --> 00:16:51,131 Ok, well, you tell me what a bird's name is. 349 00:16:51,268 --> 00:16:53,950 I don't know. Uh, how about Flappy or Paul. 350 00:16:54,225 --> 00:16:56,052 Wha--no, no, he's a Winston. 351 00:16:56,208 --> 00:16:58,910 - Right, Winston? - What is wrong with you? 352 00:16:58,928 --> 00:17:00,373 My dad's super allergic. 353 00:17:00,387 --> 00:17:02,132 You know, I couldn't have any pets, 354 00:17:02,258 --> 00:17:04,002 so this little guy fills that void. 355 00:17:04,206 --> 00:17:05,843 You said I filled that void, Ben. 356 00:17:10,327 --> 00:17:11,780 Oh, my god. 357 00:17:11,835 --> 00:17:13,232 Look at this toolbox. 358 00:17:13,438 --> 00:17:15,723 Is that all I have to do is slap on a little guyliner, 359 00:17:15,755 --> 00:17:18,332 - I get to shower with Cameron Diaz? - Uh, probably not. 360 00:17:18,366 --> 00:17:20,880 - Well, it's her loss. - She wouldn't think so. 361 00:17:21,676 --> 00:17:23,181 Sorry, sorry. 362 00:17:31,378 --> 00:17:33,353 How's he do that with the sword? 363 00:17:33,787 --> 00:17:36,460 He's an escaped soul. It could be real magic. 364 00:17:36,735 --> 00:17:38,441 You guys want to see some real magic? 365 00:17:38,475 --> 00:17:39,932 Check this out. 366 00:17:42,948 --> 00:17:45,663 It's gone. Where'd it go? 367 00:17:49,108 --> 00:17:50,541 What are we waiting for? 368 00:17:51,528 --> 00:17:53,980 We can't just suck him in with all these people around. 369 00:17:54,015 --> 00:17:56,050 Let's just catch him after the show. 370 00:18:02,097 --> 00:18:03,240 So that's it? 371 00:18:03,596 --> 00:18:05,611 What, no cheering? No standing ovation? 372 00:18:09,936 --> 00:18:11,403 It's not funny. 373 00:18:11,988 --> 00:18:14,253 I perform magic no one else can touch, 374 00:18:14,308 --> 00:18:16,190 and all you do is just sit there. 375 00:18:17,158 --> 00:18:18,701 What do you people want? 376 00:18:19,006 --> 00:18:20,680 Maybe you need proof-- 377 00:18:20,988 --> 00:18:23,480 Proof that I'm the greatest magician in the world. 378 00:18:24,296 --> 00:18:26,692 What's the matter, mate? Don't you like my show? 379 00:18:26,765 --> 00:18:29,061 I don't know. I'm just headed to the restroom. 380 00:18:29,285 --> 00:18:31,043 And that's better than my act? 381 00:18:31,748 --> 00:18:34,030 You're a magician at a food festival. 382 00:18:34,326 --> 00:18:35,390 What do you want from me? 383 00:18:35,437 --> 00:18:37,862 Come on, why don't you get up on stage for a trick 384 00:18:37,896 --> 00:18:40,493 guaranteed to impress you? To impress all of you? 385 00:18:40,765 --> 00:18:43,081 Come on, everybody, a round of applause to encourage this guy. 386 00:18:43,115 --> 00:18:44,331 Come on, come on. 387 00:18:46,488 --> 00:18:47,871 Is this a real sword? 388 00:18:52,056 --> 00:18:53,200 It's real. 389 00:18:53,948 --> 00:18:55,550 You better believe it. 390 00:19:13,706 --> 00:19:15,750 You gotta admit that was a pretty good trick. 391 00:19:15,786 --> 00:19:17,760 Let's catch him backstage. Come on. Come on. 392 00:19:17,798 --> 00:19:19,051 I want an autograph. 393 00:19:19,507 --> 00:19:22,220 Hey, I waited out front till the lobby was empty. No sign of him. 394 00:19:22,258 --> 00:19:24,452 Yeah, and he didn't pass me out back. 395 00:19:24,908 --> 00:19:26,613 Damn it, we lost him. 396 00:19:30,388 --> 00:19:33,571 All right, it sucks the soul got away, but at least nobody died, right? 397 00:19:33,606 --> 00:19:35,421 Yeah, and nothing happened to Winston. 398 00:19:35,455 --> 00:19:36,861 And nobody died, too. 399 00:19:37,368 --> 00:19:38,743 What happened? 400 00:19:39,526 --> 00:19:41,651 Excuse me. What happened to him? 401 00:19:42,496 --> 00:19:44,130 Oh, we found him keeled over, 402 00:19:44,205 --> 00:19:45,810 massive internal injuries. 403 00:19:46,576 --> 00:19:48,620 Must have been hit by a car or something. 404 00:20:02,876 --> 00:20:04,360 Another beer, please. 405 00:20:04,665 --> 00:20:07,363 You know, I've never seen a dead body up close before. 406 00:20:07,726 --> 00:20:09,631 - It's messed up. - I know, right? 407 00:20:09,886 --> 00:20:12,260 I mean you'd think that seeing scarface all those times, 408 00:20:12,298 --> 00:20:14,242 I'd be better prepared for that, but... 409 00:20:14,585 --> 00:20:17,131 - Why'd the magician kill that guy? - I don't know. 410 00:20:17,255 --> 00:20:18,813 I feel like He hates the audience. 411 00:20:18,845 --> 00:20:21,630 Like he blames them for his crappy career when he was alive. 412 00:20:21,666 --> 00:20:24,151 Well, at least we know where he's gonna be. 413 00:20:24,918 --> 00:20:26,991 The next performance is tomorrow at noon, 414 00:20:27,287 --> 00:20:29,480 which means we need to ask Ted for time off. 415 00:20:30,037 --> 00:20:31,491 - What are you doing? - Nothing. 416 00:20:31,526 --> 00:20:33,000 - What are you doing? - Nothing! 417 00:20:33,038 --> 00:20:33,933 Let me... 418 00:20:35,756 --> 00:20:37,280 You need help. 419 00:20:37,307 --> 00:20:38,882 I'm worried about Winston. 420 00:20:39,178 --> 00:20:40,601 He's innocent in all this. 421 00:20:40,856 --> 00:20:42,393 What about me, man? I'm an innocent. 422 00:20:42,427 --> 00:20:44,771 You're not feeding me pretzels and nestling me to your breast. 423 00:20:44,818 --> 00:20:45,980 Ok, that's just gross. 424 00:20:46,336 --> 00:20:48,402 Because you signed a contract with the devil, Sam. 425 00:20:48,437 --> 00:20:50,630 - No, I did not. - You didn't sign anything? 426 00:20:50,816 --> 00:20:53,042 - No. No, my parents did. - That's weird. 427 00:20:53,307 --> 00:20:55,583 Says the guy with the shirt full of bird. 428 00:20:55,826 --> 00:20:58,191 Dude, you should really take a look at that contract. 429 00:20:58,228 --> 00:21:00,720 That's not cool your parents sold your soul to the devil 430 00:21:00,757 --> 00:21:03,452 without your consent. Isn't that right, little man? 431 00:21:04,565 --> 00:21:06,030 Yeah, that's a good point. 432 00:21:06,786 --> 00:21:09,582 See if my parents have a copy of the contract somewhere. 433 00:21:11,946 --> 00:21:13,981 Hey, good morning. You're up early. 434 00:21:14,276 --> 00:21:22,632 - Can I see my contract? - Which contract is that? 435 00:21:23,226 --> 00:21:27,583 Uh...it's... the contract. 436 00:21:27,866 --> 00:21:30,482 You know, for my soul? 437 00:21:32,217 --> 00:21:34,110 What do you want to see that for? 438 00:21:34,416 --> 00:21:36,262 Well, I just thought I should see it. 439 00:21:37,147 --> 00:21:39,802 You know what? You're right. 440 00:21:40,215 --> 00:21:42,021 You deserve to see it. 441 00:21:42,738 --> 00:21:46,583 Ok, uh, let me think. Where did we put that? 442 00:21:47,166 --> 00:21:48,893 Well, what's in there? 443 00:21:49,286 --> 00:21:51,440 This is your memento box. 444 00:21:52,116 --> 00:21:55,053 I haven't looked in here in years. 445 00:21:58,305 --> 00:22:02,371 You put the contract for my soul with my third-grade report card 446 00:22:02,625 --> 00:22:05,903 - and Mr. Huggles? - Yeah, you're right. 447 00:22:06,155 --> 00:22:07,551 It's not gonna be in here. 448 00:22:08,245 --> 00:22:10,770 Ok, maybe your dad knows where it is. 449 00:22:15,857 --> 00:22:18,210 Oh. Well, uh... 450 00:22:18,477 --> 00:22:20,021 Did you check the linen closet? 451 00:22:20,035 --> 00:22:21,902 Yes. John, you know, 452 00:22:22,216 --> 00:22:24,292 I don't understand why you can't get a handle on the paperwork. 453 00:22:24,325 --> 00:22:26,211 We have absolutely no filing system. 454 00:22:26,936 --> 00:22:29,073 I konw you keep your golf cleats and tennis shoes... 455 00:22:29,108 --> 00:22:31,802 - You're up, John. - Can we talk about this later? 456 00:22:32,128 --> 00:22:34,290 Fine. But that's your answer to everything. 457 00:22:34,558 --> 00:22:36,171 Just... uh... 458 00:22:36,488 --> 00:22:39,530 - Check the office with the tax returns. - Ok. 459 00:22:41,215 --> 00:22:42,541 Come on, Sam. 460 00:22:49,958 --> 00:22:51,611 Here it is. 461 00:22:55,667 --> 00:22:58,342 - This is kind of a big deal. - I know. 462 00:23:04,357 --> 00:23:05,650 What's wrong? 463 00:23:15,566 --> 00:23:17,011 It fell apart. 464 00:23:25,606 --> 00:23:26,690 Don't disappear. 465 00:23:27,095 --> 00:23:28,142 Don't disappear. 466 00:23:29,166 --> 00:23:30,223 Don't disappear. 467 00:23:35,767 --> 00:23:37,531 Son of a bitch! 468 00:24:00,196 --> 00:24:01,782 Hey, you want a ride? 469 00:24:03,268 --> 00:24:04,641 Oh, just leave me alone! 470 00:24:04,985 --> 00:24:06,310 Aw, come on. Hop in. 471 00:24:06,636 --> 00:24:08,420 I want you to feel the V8 in this baby. 472 00:24:08,458 --> 00:24:09,793 Yeah, what are you gonna want in return? 473 00:24:09,826 --> 00:24:11,293 Do I have to sign a contract? 474 00:24:11,605 --> 00:24:12,721 You know, Sam... 475 00:24:13,125 --> 00:24:15,802 Sarcasm is the lowest form of social discourse. 476 00:24:16,157 --> 00:24:18,630 Just go--go away! What are you doing here? 477 00:24:18,885 --> 00:24:20,282 What's eating you, champ? 478 00:24:20,555 --> 00:24:22,903 How about you-- you own my soul? 479 00:24:23,126 --> 00:24:24,492 You won't let me take any vacations. 480 00:24:24,526 --> 00:24:27,571 I mean, the contract you gave my parents just turned to dust! 481 00:24:27,896 --> 00:24:30,412 - Forget about the contract. - No. No, I want to see it. 482 00:24:30,448 --> 00:24:31,860 But why? 483 00:24:32,238 --> 00:24:34,930 - Because I want to know my rights. - Oh, that's easy. 484 00:24:35,136 --> 00:24:36,591 You don't have any. 485 00:24:39,837 --> 00:24:41,070 Go around! 486 00:24:43,595 --> 00:24:45,311 Go to hell, jerk! 487 00:24:46,457 --> 00:24:49,061 I'll meet you there, Bruce! 488 00:24:50,926 --> 00:24:52,872 You know that little thing on his neck? 489 00:24:52,958 --> 00:24:54,701 - Not a freckle. - Ok... 490 00:24:55,595 --> 00:24:57,153 So I'm--I'm a slave. 491 00:24:57,568 --> 00:25:00,270 And I catch one soul after another for the rest of my life. 492 00:25:00,307 --> 00:25:02,363 No days off. Nothing to look forward to forever. 493 00:25:02,397 --> 00:25:04,362 Oh, so that's what you want--incentive. 494 00:25:04,605 --> 00:25:06,150 - Yes. - Oh, I can do that. 495 00:25:06,516 --> 00:25:08,753 I can motivate you 110%. 496 00:25:09,638 --> 00:25:11,201 Wait, no! What-- 497 00:25:11,436 --> 00:25:13,301 What are you gonna do?! 498 00:25:24,228 --> 00:25:26,602 - Can I help you? - No. 499 00:25:28,456 --> 00:25:31,180 - Hi! Can I help you? - No. 500 00:25:35,647 --> 00:25:38,270 Hi, I'm Andi. Can I help you? 501 00:25:39,815 --> 00:25:43,091 You know... I bet you can. 502 00:25:53,475 --> 00:25:54,902 Here you are. 503 00:26:13,867 --> 00:26:16,710 Magic show starts in 40 minutes. We better deal with Ted. 504 00:26:16,756 --> 00:26:17,900 I got the perfect plan. 505 00:26:18,115 --> 00:26:20,660 Hey, hey. Uh, Ted. Ted! Kaczynski! 506 00:26:20,988 --> 00:26:23,330 We were wondering if we could take an early lunch, 507 00:26:23,367 --> 00:26:24,332 if that's ok. 508 00:26:24,617 --> 00:26:26,212 Why do you need to get off work? 509 00:26:26,347 --> 00:26:27,541 I'm glad you asked, Ted. 510 00:26:27,827 --> 00:26:31,802 Drywell is having a driveway sealant seminar at lunch, Ted, 511 00:26:32,047 --> 00:26:35,140 basic information on installation, maintenance, what have you. 512 00:26:35,337 --> 00:26:37,503 And I know that you've been trying to beef up the 513 00:26:37,537 --> 00:26:39,313 driveway sealant department for quite some time, 514 00:26:39,346 --> 00:26:40,540 as well as our knowledge 515 00:26:40,777 --> 00:26:42,721 of driveway sealants, so we thought we'd go over there 516 00:26:42,756 --> 00:26:45,983 and bone up on driveway sealant. That's that. 517 00:26:46,326 --> 00:26:48,513 You know what, guys? That sounds like a great idea. 518 00:26:48,547 --> 00:26:50,550 It sound responsible. Efficient, even. 519 00:26:50,827 --> 00:26:53,321 I told you he'd be cool with it, right? 520 00:26:53,596 --> 00:26:55,051 Great, thanks. 521 00:26:55,308 --> 00:26:57,352 Only if I was a complete and utter idiot. 522 00:27:01,977 --> 00:27:03,462 Guys, seriously. 523 00:27:03,738 --> 00:27:05,212 Driveway sealant? 524 00:27:05,495 --> 00:27:07,051 Think I'm just gonna let you blow off work 525 00:27:07,085 --> 00:27:08,981 to go to a magic show with Andi? 526 00:27:09,516 --> 00:27:11,812 - Heh! Magic show. Please! - Wait, wait! 527 00:27:12,128 --> 00:27:14,252 Ted, how do you know about a magic show with Andi? 528 00:27:14,285 --> 00:27:15,631 What are you talking about? 529 00:27:15,875 --> 00:27:17,950 'Cause some guy was in here giving away free tickets. 530 00:27:17,986 --> 00:27:20,260 Was this guy in a suit, really, really tan... 531 00:27:20,507 --> 00:27:21,460 You know what, Sam? 532 00:27:21,797 --> 00:27:24,102 I'm not really in the habit of checking other men out. 533 00:27:24,137 --> 00:27:25,752 Unlike some people I know. 534 00:27:26,006 --> 00:27:28,342 Huh? Oh, sorry. Heh! 535 00:27:28,576 --> 00:27:31,323 I was so busy checking out your ass, I missed your funny joke. 536 00:27:31,358 --> 00:27:34,753 - Ok, come on, come on. Let's go. - Did you want to repeat it, or... 537 00:27:37,555 --> 00:27:40,592 Whoa, wha-- Why are we running? 538 00:27:43,217 --> 00:27:44,972 The devil's trying to set up Andi. Let's go. 539 00:27:45,005 --> 00:27:47,150 Wait, wait! Let me catch my breath! Sam! 540 00:27:47,465 --> 00:27:49,032 Relax. He'll be back. 541 00:27:49,306 --> 00:27:51,401 - Where the hell's the bird? - He got out. 542 00:27:52,146 --> 00:27:55,163 - What? How? - We were talking. 543 00:27:55,208 --> 00:27:56,901 All right, just catch the bird and 544 00:27:57,068 --> 00:27:58,462 meet me at the magic show. 545 00:27:58,876 --> 00:28:02,113 Come on, Winston. Come to daddy. We have to go now. 546 00:28:02,378 --> 00:28:05,173 - I'll bring him down. - I will cut you where you stand. 547 00:28:09,747 --> 00:28:12,301 So what is it now, roof tar class? 548 00:28:12,555 --> 00:28:15,412 Look, Ted... I'll work the weekend shift. 549 00:28:15,877 --> 00:28:17,791 I'll work the next 4 weekend shifts! 550 00:28:18,026 --> 00:28:19,762 I'll work nights! Hell, I'll even work Thanksgiving! 551 00:28:19,797 --> 00:28:21,390 - Come on! - Seriously, you'd... 552 00:28:21,657 --> 00:28:24,183 - You'd give up all that? - Yes. Now move! 553 00:28:24,665 --> 00:28:26,102 Ok then. 554 00:28:31,028 --> 00:28:32,622 Ted is good. 555 00:28:50,717 --> 00:28:52,871 Hey, what took you so long? 556 00:28:53,186 --> 00:28:56,180 - What do you mean? - I got your voicemail to meet you here. 557 00:28:56,257 --> 00:28:58,930 - Voicemail? In my voice? - Um, yeah? 558 00:28:59,178 --> 00:29:00,970 What, you don't remember leaving it? 559 00:29:01,318 --> 00:29:03,592 Uh...that message. Yes, yes. I do. 560 00:29:03,897 --> 00:29:06,183 Um, sorry, I had a small stroke earlier. 561 00:29:06,425 --> 00:29:07,852 - We gotta go. Let's-- - No, no! 562 00:29:07,888 --> 00:29:10,453 - This is kind of fun. - This--he sucks! Let's go. 563 00:29:12,345 --> 00:29:14,110 He's right behind me, isn't he? 564 00:29:14,896 --> 00:29:16,240 I suck. 565 00:29:17,687 --> 00:29:21,241 Why don't you come up on stage and let me show you some real magic? 566 00:29:22,038 --> 00:29:25,061 I--I would do that, but we were just leaving. 567 00:29:25,105 --> 00:29:27,780 Ladies and gentlemen, come on, give this guy some encouragement. 568 00:29:27,816 --> 00:29:30,751 No, no! Seriously, no. Andi, stop laughing. 569 00:29:30,976 --> 00:29:32,923 - We gotta go. - You're such a chicken. 570 00:29:33,166 --> 00:29:35,861 - You know what? I'll do it. - No! No, you can't. 571 00:29:36,105 --> 00:29:37,801 Why not? It'll be fun. I'll do it. 572 00:29:37,867 --> 00:29:40,851 Because... he asked me first. 573 00:29:41,118 --> 00:29:43,083 - Right? - Ok. 574 00:29:46,026 --> 00:29:47,441 Let's do this. 575 00:29:56,937 --> 00:29:58,533 You looking for something? 576 00:29:59,196 --> 00:30:01,513 This isn't enough to hold your attention? 577 00:30:01,817 --> 00:30:05,280 Uh, no. My friends are supposed to meet me here, so I was... 578 00:30:05,538 --> 00:30:07,051 - Touch it. - What? 579 00:30:07,356 --> 00:30:09,262 Touch the sword. Tell them it's real. 580 00:30:11,658 --> 00:30:13,230 I don't know. Seems... 581 00:30:13,746 --> 00:30:16,962 - Could be fake. - Hold it. It's real. 582 00:30:18,175 --> 00:30:19,582 Yeah, that's, uh... 583 00:30:19,815 --> 00:30:22,262 That's some pretty good action right there. Yeah. 584 00:30:23,976 --> 00:30:25,422 Ladies and gentlemen, 585 00:30:25,795 --> 00:30:28,142 looks like our volunteer's contracted a case of stage fright. 586 00:30:28,176 --> 00:30:29,622 We'll be right back. 587 00:30:35,636 --> 00:30:37,173 Give me back my sword. 588 00:30:39,258 --> 00:30:40,782 You need it, don't you? 589 00:30:41,727 --> 00:30:43,641 You have no power without it. 590 00:30:43,938 --> 00:30:45,422 What are you, a demon? 591 00:30:45,788 --> 00:30:48,081 No, I'm just the guy sending you back to hell. 592 00:30:48,525 --> 00:30:51,493 Just as soon as my friends show up. 593 00:30:52,528 --> 00:30:54,623 I'm not gonna let you kill anymore people! 594 00:30:54,885 --> 00:30:57,373 Those yokels out there get what they deserve. 595 00:30:58,048 --> 00:30:59,763 I give them pure magic, 596 00:31:00,077 --> 00:31:02,852 and they respond like a bunch of slack-jawed cattle. 597 00:31:03,146 --> 00:31:04,442 Yeah, well, maybe they respond that way 598 00:31:04,475 --> 00:31:06,430 because you're such a total dickwad. 599 00:31:06,687 --> 00:31:08,690 You have no idea what I went through in hell, 600 00:31:08,728 --> 00:31:12,000 what I feels like to be impaled on a sword for decades on end. 601 00:31:12,267 --> 00:31:14,961 Yeah, well, get used to it, because you're going back. 602 00:32:38,887 --> 00:32:40,132 Sam! You all right? 603 00:32:40,348 --> 00:32:41,790 No, no! He's right behind me! 604 00:32:42,966 --> 00:32:44,913 Give me the vessel. Give me the vessel. 605 00:32:45,365 --> 00:32:46,913 Wave it around! Wave it around! 606 00:32:49,026 --> 00:32:50,692 You stupid bird, come on! 607 00:32:50,787 --> 00:32:52,501 - Come on! Come on! - Go, go! 608 00:32:52,778 --> 00:32:54,650 - Come on, Winston! - Go, Winston! 609 00:32:54,665 --> 00:32:57,241 - Come on, come on. Come on, Winston. - It's sad. 610 00:32:57,795 --> 00:33:01,411 So stupid, you can't even figure out the simplest of tricks. 611 00:33:02,167 --> 00:33:03,681 Huh? Tricks? Tricks. 612 00:33:03,708 --> 00:33:05,782 That's it! That's it! 613 00:33:08,505 --> 00:33:10,282 Sam, what are you doing, Sam? 614 00:33:13,416 --> 00:33:15,133 Uh, ta da? 615 00:33:22,506 --> 00:33:23,861 Winston? 616 00:33:44,637 --> 00:33:45,953 That, my friend... 617 00:33:45,995 --> 00:33:47,872 was some fine hell sucking. 618 00:33:48,198 --> 00:33:49,180 Come on. 619 00:33:59,095 --> 00:34:01,300 Aw, that was awesome. 620 00:34:05,875 --> 00:34:07,070 Hi, Gladys. 621 00:34:07,557 --> 00:34:10,350 You are looking... today! 622 00:34:10,627 --> 00:34:13,422 Place the vessel on the mat. 623 00:34:14,095 --> 00:34:15,962 It's gonna be kind of difficult with all that 624 00:34:15,997 --> 00:34:17,390 sexual tension pushing back. 625 00:34:19,625 --> 00:34:20,652 You ready? 626 00:34:22,277 --> 00:34:23,240 Yeah. 627 00:34:24,048 --> 00:34:26,330 Oh, I--can I have a moment? 628 00:34:29,906 --> 00:34:31,080 Winston... 629 00:34:33,347 --> 00:34:35,310 You're one freaky ass bird 630 00:34:35,608 --> 00:34:38,653 who scared the crap out of me, and now I can't be comfortable 631 00:34:38,827 --> 00:34:41,993 around birds ever again. I hope you know that. 632 00:34:45,587 --> 00:34:46,532 Ok. 633 00:34:46,805 --> 00:34:47,871 - All right. - Cool. 634 00:34:48,095 --> 00:34:49,150 It's cool. 635 00:34:49,837 --> 00:34:51,003 Ok. 636 00:34:52,046 --> 00:34:54,173 - Thank you, Gladys. - Oh, I'm sorry. 637 00:34:54,528 --> 00:34:55,900 These are his favorite. 638 00:34:56,707 --> 00:34:57,881 Ok, now I'm done. 639 00:35:08,858 --> 00:35:10,541 So what did happen to you? 640 00:35:11,586 --> 00:35:13,761 Yeah, that was a hell of a magic trick. 641 00:35:14,057 --> 00:35:15,493 He made you both disappear. 642 00:35:15,918 --> 00:35:17,763 Why did you run off the stage? 643 00:35:18,626 --> 00:35:20,131 Yeah, I, um... 644 00:35:20,416 --> 00:35:24,043 - I ate a bad hotdog, so-- - Ooh. Yeah, well... 645 00:35:24,248 --> 00:35:26,340 You better man up for this weekend because 646 00:35:26,505 --> 00:35:28,850 we have a long trip and limited bathroom stops. 647 00:35:29,085 --> 00:35:32,260 Right, yes. Um, about that... 648 00:35:33,107 --> 00:35:35,192 I...I can't go. 649 00:35:35,715 --> 00:35:38,672 What? Are you that sick? 650 00:35:38,926 --> 00:35:41,731 No, no, no. Um...I'm working. 651 00:35:41,975 --> 00:35:44,520 I told Ted that I'd work the next 4 weekend shifts. 652 00:35:44,606 --> 00:35:45,651 What? 653 00:35:45,947 --> 00:35:47,370 Why would you say that? 654 00:35:47,645 --> 00:35:49,253 I mean, you knew we were going away this weekend. 655 00:35:49,285 --> 00:35:50,613 Don't be mad. I-- 656 00:35:50,926 --> 00:35:54,033 No, I'm not mad. I'm just... I'm confused. 657 00:35:54,295 --> 00:35:55,641 I mean, if you didn't want to go with me, 658 00:35:55,678 --> 00:35:57,072 why wouldn't you just say that, 659 00:35:57,108 --> 00:35:59,303 and why saddle yourself with weekend shifts? 660 00:36:00,538 --> 00:36:03,663 - Th--that is an excellent question. - Ok, then answer it. 661 00:36:03,938 --> 00:36:05,793 That I can't-- I can't answer. 662 00:36:06,045 --> 00:36:07,580 It's hard to explain, all right? 663 00:36:07,616 --> 00:36:09,890 I--I tried, but Ted wouldn't let me. 664 00:36:10,148 --> 00:36:11,552 It's not that I didn't want to-- 665 00:36:11,588 --> 00:36:12,950 Ok, you know what? I take it back. 666 00:36:12,988 --> 00:36:14,000 I am mad. 667 00:36:14,287 --> 00:36:16,230 - Wait, Andi, hold on! - You know what? 668 00:36:16,418 --> 00:36:18,612 We could've had a really great weekend, Sam. 669 00:36:18,667 --> 00:36:21,911 And then you had to get all caught up in your head and make it weird. 670 00:36:21,945 --> 00:36:24,133 No! I don't think it's weird. It's the opposite. 671 00:36:24,165 --> 00:36:26,161 - It's not weird. - Yes, it feels weird. 672 00:36:26,726 --> 00:36:28,672 Listen, you're like my best friend, ok? 673 00:36:28,935 --> 00:36:30,990 I really don't want things to change. 674 00:36:31,238 --> 00:36:33,841 And they won't! We--we're--we are friends. 675 00:36:35,535 --> 00:36:38,472 Just friends that can't spend time alone together, huh? 676 00:36:40,007 --> 00:36:42,323 Never mind. Never mind. 677 00:36:42,508 --> 00:36:45,120 Listen, I'll bring you back a program, ok? 678 00:36:57,246 --> 00:36:59,200 Ah, drinking alone. 679 00:36:59,706 --> 00:37:01,442 That's a slippery slope. 680 00:37:02,226 --> 00:37:03,871 I don't have much else to do. 681 00:37:04,516 --> 00:37:06,900 I'll have a cranberry and soda, my good woman. 682 00:37:08,187 --> 00:37:11,200 I never drink while I work. Clouds the mind. 683 00:37:11,828 --> 00:37:14,042 Maybe if you drank, you'd be less of a dick. 684 00:37:14,978 --> 00:37:16,742 Hmm, yeah. 685 00:37:17,638 --> 00:37:18,992 Oh, buddy. 686 00:37:19,318 --> 00:37:21,672 You've worked hard, sacrificed. 687 00:37:22,058 --> 00:37:23,782 I really appreciate that. 688 00:37:26,617 --> 00:37:28,082 You know what? 689 00:37:28,386 --> 00:37:29,830 You can take the weekend off. 690 00:37:30,126 --> 00:37:31,542 Go to your little concert. 691 00:37:31,875 --> 00:37:33,953 Drop some ecstasy, whatever you want. 692 00:37:34,207 --> 00:37:35,663 I work this weekend. 693 00:37:36,046 --> 00:37:38,653 I work the next 4 weekends because of you. 694 00:37:38,888 --> 00:37:41,102 - What did I do? - You put Andi in danger. 695 00:37:43,207 --> 00:37:46,010 Yeah, right. I did, didn't I? 696 00:37:51,768 --> 00:37:53,470 Well, this really sucks. 697 00:37:53,896 --> 00:37:55,623 Can't go on your trip. 698 00:37:55,955 --> 00:37:57,551 You don't get the girl. 699 00:37:57,807 --> 00:38:00,050 You expect me to believe you feel bad for me? 700 00:38:00,186 --> 00:38:01,890 - I do! - No, you don't. 701 00:38:02,126 --> 00:38:03,761 I do, I do. I feel terrible. 702 00:38:03,776 --> 00:38:05,730 I feel crappy. I feel awful. 703 00:38:06,757 --> 00:38:09,501 You sure there's nothing I can do to make it up to you? 704 00:38:13,888 --> 00:38:15,353 I want the contract. 705 00:38:16,326 --> 00:38:19,230 What do you have? A death wish? 706 00:38:19,655 --> 00:38:21,950 Well, I realized if anything's gonna kill me, 707 00:38:22,215 --> 00:38:25,110 it's gonna be some psycho escaped soul from hell, not you. 708 00:38:25,566 --> 00:38:28,962 Because... you need me. 709 00:38:31,066 --> 00:38:32,030 And I-- 710 00:38:32,315 --> 00:38:33,701 I need that contract. 711 00:38:40,115 --> 00:38:43,250 See, what is it about you, Sammy? 712 00:38:44,125 --> 00:38:45,831 I just can't say no. 713 00:38:46,838 --> 00:38:49,990 All right, I'll talk to the guys downstairs and 714 00:38:50,285 --> 00:38:52,531 see if they can dig up a draft, all right? 715 00:38:52,546 --> 00:38:54,230 Filing system in the abyss is 716 00:38:54,695 --> 00:38:58,551 shabby, as you might expect, but I'll put in a request. 717 00:38:58,935 --> 00:39:02,583 - Ok? Fair enough? - Yes. Thank you. 718 00:39:02,785 --> 00:39:04,190 Yeah, well... 719 00:39:05,987 --> 00:39:08,242 What the heck. I'll have what he's having. 720 00:39:10,116 --> 00:39:12,262 You know the one bright side of all this? 721 00:39:12,636 --> 00:39:14,831 Now you know that Andi's into you. 722 00:39:15,147 --> 00:39:17,450 - No, she almost bit my head off. - Exactly. 723 00:39:17,948 --> 00:39:20,530 The lady don't protest too much, me thinks. 724 00:39:21,305 --> 00:39:22,500 Thanks. 725 00:39:23,037 --> 00:39:25,071 Do you-- do you really think so? 726 00:39:25,316 --> 00:39:26,591 Trust me, buddy. 727 00:39:26,908 --> 00:39:29,741 I do know a thing or two about the human animal. 728 00:39:29,966 --> 00:39:33,243 Thanks to Raceman for the transcript 729 00:39:33,515 --> 00:39:36,843 Subtitles made by the Bloc Team For www.forom.com 730 00:39:36,893 --> 00:39:41,443 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 54320

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