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RICHARD: Jonathan Walsh is an alien!
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Walsh wants to meet.
3
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I'm just gonna tell Ozzie everything.
4
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You promised to come alone.
5
00:00:05,290 --> 00:00:07,842
You're the reason I've got an
FBI agent following me around.
6
00:00:07,867 --> 00:00:10,068
We need to distract Alex
so I can sneak out.
7
00:00:10,093 --> 00:00:11,686
- Where's Ozzie?
- You compromised
8
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a criminal investigation,
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and you made me look like an idiot.
10
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- Terminate Walsh.
- I'll take care of the traitor.
11
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Get some sleep. Big day tomorrow.
12
00:00:21,937 --> 00:00:23,936
Good morning, everybody.
13
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Look what I got.
14
00:00:26,546 --> 00:00:28,045
- Doughnut?
- Ooh.
15
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[CHUCKLES]
16
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[INHALES DEEPLY] Ahh.
17
00:00:30,847 --> 00:00:32,968
The smell of computers. I missed that.
18
00:00:33,001 --> 00:00:35,568
Hey, have at it, okay?
19
00:00:37,249 --> 00:00:38,414
Oh, uh,
20
00:00:38,439 --> 00:00:40,077
why are you in my office?
21
00:00:40,850 --> 00:00:42,530
Are you my new secretary?
22
00:00:42,592 --> 00:00:44,997
- This is my office.
- Uh, no. It's not.
23
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It's my office.
24
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It says so, right here on the door.
25
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Fired?!
26
00:00:52,235 --> 00:00:53,367
How is this the first
27
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I'm hearing of this?!
28
00:00:54,297 --> 00:00:55,382
Uh, we sent you an e-mail.
29
00:00:55,407 --> 00:00:56,773
I-I don't know if you know this,
30
00:00:56,798 --> 00:00:58,798
but you are firing a man
31
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whose girlfriend blew
up in front of him.
32
00:01:01,897 --> 00:01:04,483
I'm sorry, it's just not a good fit.
33
00:01:04,614 --> 00:01:06,311
I know what this is about.
34
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This is because I believe in aliens.
35
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This is discrimination!
36
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Nope. No. No, we made it
very clear in our e-mail,
37
00:01:12,455 --> 00:01:14,255
which was cc'd to HR and our legal team.
38
00:01:14,319 --> 00:01:16,843
This is only about your
negligence and incompetence.
39
00:01:16,893 --> 00:01:18,616
You took a week off
without telling anyone.
40
00:01:18,658 --> 00:01:21,811
Are you telling me that I'm
worse at my job than Karen,
41
00:01:22,034 --> 00:01:24,201
who can't open an attachment?
42
00:01:24,273 --> 00:01:25,472
Or Tom,
43
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who's an actual Reptilian?
44
00:01:33,841 --> 00:01:36,909
Waaaalsh!
45
00:01:37,013 --> 00:01:46,187
?
46
00:01:46,431 --> 00:01:48,164
[SIGHS]
47
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Oh, Jesus!
48
00:01:54,330 --> 00:01:55,753
How many guns does this woman own?
49
00:01:55,778 --> 00:01:56,778
Oh, My God.
50
00:01:57,100 --> 00:02:07,108
?
51
00:02:07,110 --> 00:02:09,410
?
52
00:02:09,412 --> 00:02:10,678
Did anyone follow you?
53
00:02:10,680 --> 00:02:12,480
Jesus, Jonathan. You look like shit.
54
00:02:12,568 --> 00:02:14,815
Yeah, yeah. Did anyone follow you?
55
00:02:14,904 --> 00:02:16,851
I told you, I lost Agent Foster.
56
00:02:17,060 --> 00:02:18,352
No. Someone else is after me.
57
00:02:18,599 --> 00:02:21,216
Wow. Somebody's paranoid.
Not everyone is after you.
58
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I didn't say everyone. I said someone.
59
00:02:24,020 --> 00:02:25,519
I'm sorry if I'm a little nervous.
60
00:02:25,584 --> 00:02:28,068
You're nervous? I'm the one in
a creepy cabin in the woods
61
00:02:28,164 --> 00:02:29,430
with a known fugitive.
62
00:02:29,565 --> 00:02:32,233
But, yes. I came alone, all right?
63
00:02:32,318 --> 00:02:34,235
Even though the group didn't want me to.
64
00:02:34,271 --> 00:02:37,185
Hell, Yvonne even put a gun
in this box of chocolates.
65
00:02:37,470 --> 00:02:39,837
Relax. I left it in the car.
66
00:02:41,786 --> 00:02:43,816
I gave them the best years of my life,
67
00:02:43,841 --> 00:02:46,248
and they kicked me to the
curb like I was nothing.
68
00:02:46,339 --> 00:02:47,882
[CELLPHONES CHIME]
69
00:02:48,256 --> 00:02:50,251
You guys, Ozzie just texted me!
70
00:02:50,396 --> 00:02:51,677
- He's okay.
- Oh,
71
00:02:51,702 --> 00:02:53,232
and he's made contact with Walsh!
72
00:02:53,295 --> 00:02:55,122
Yeah, we know. We're in a group text.
73
00:02:55,177 --> 00:02:57,146
Walsh. This is all his fault.
74
00:02:57,171 --> 00:02:58,779
I mean, he took away
75
00:02:58,804 --> 00:03:01,123
the two most important
things in my life...
76
00:03:01,148 --> 00:03:02,381
Nancy and my job.
77
00:03:02,406 --> 00:03:04,170
And now he's interrupting my therapy.
78
00:03:04,245 --> 00:03:07,246
Richard, I understand why you
blame him for everything.
79
00:03:07,381 --> 00:03:08,717
But I think it would be helpful for you
80
00:03:08,741 --> 00:03:11,787
to take your hatred and
transform it into action.
81
00:03:11,874 --> 00:03:13,154
You mean "revenge"?
82
00:03:13,211 --> 00:03:15,091
Uh, well, to me,
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00:03:15,138 --> 00:03:18,345
- the best revenge is a life well lived.
- No, don't do that.
84
00:03:18,347 --> 00:03:19,809
Let's brainstorm a little bit on that.
85
00:03:19,833 --> 00:03:21,685
How about taking a kickboxing class?
86
00:03:21,741 --> 00:03:23,208
- No.
- Or adopt a foster animal.
87
00:03:23,453 --> 00:03:25,981
- Bleh!
- Or you go see a cathartic dance show.
88
00:03:26,006 --> 00:03:27,539
Tomorrow night. 8:00 p.m.
89
00:03:27,640 --> 00:03:30,140
$5. Everybody should go.
90
00:03:30,259 --> 00:03:32,760
Performed... It's gonna
be performed by me.
91
00:03:32,942 --> 00:03:34,223
Yeah, something like that.
92
00:03:34,248 --> 00:03:36,582
Yeah, that sounds great.
93
00:03:36,656 --> 00:03:38,800
But I-I don't see how
that gets my job back.
94
00:03:38,825 --> 00:03:40,958
How about this... What if you were to...
95
00:03:41,038 --> 00:03:43,528
put some of your grievances into writing
96
00:03:43,642 --> 00:03:45,443
- and mail them...
- To the Department of Labor?
97
00:03:45,467 --> 00:03:47,364
I was gonna say to yourself.
98
00:03:47,555 --> 00:03:49,356
Sometimes a little self-reflection
99
00:03:49,381 --> 00:03:50,645
can be very, very healing.
100
00:03:50,715 --> 00:03:53,497
No. Writing to yourself
is what crazy people do.
101
00:03:53,578 --> 00:03:54,754
[CHUCKLES]
102
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ALEX: "Many U.S.
Presidents are considered"
103
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to have been Reptilian.
104
00:03:59,322 --> 00:04:03,700
"Most people don't realize
that Taft had a tail."
105
00:04:05,466 --> 00:04:07,199
I'm guessing he didn't.
106
00:04:07,287 --> 00:04:09,521
[CELLPHONE VIBRATES]
107
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- Agent Foster.
- JIM: Tell me you got Walsh.
108
00:04:11,936 --> 00:04:14,837
I-I almost basically do, sir.
109
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There's a lot of qualifiers
in that sentence.
110
00:04:17,169 --> 00:04:18,443
Do we need to send somebody else?
111
00:04:18,467 --> 00:04:20,309
No, no, no. No. I've got...
I've got a plan.
112
00:04:20,347 --> 00:04:23,071
- I promise I'll get him.
- Okay. You've got 24 hours.
113
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I'll do it in 23, sir.
114
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23, then.
115
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[RECEIVER CLICKS]
116
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23 hours? Idiot.
117
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- [CELLPHONE BEEPS]
- Why'd you say that?
118
00:04:31,192 --> 00:04:34,161
Once that's in place, my
boss will open his computer.
119
00:04:34,186 --> 00:04:35,207
[SNAPS FINGERS]
120
00:04:35,232 --> 00:04:38,223
It will send a virus to
everyone in the company.
121
00:04:38,281 --> 00:04:40,301
Okay, I'm sorry. Is Richard
122
00:04:40,344 --> 00:04:42,598
just gonna hog the entire session?!
123
00:04:42,731 --> 00:04:45,981
I am sorry, but I was fired!
124
00:04:46,019 --> 00:04:48,354
And if I can't workshop
my plan for revenge here,
125
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- then where can I do it?
- Oh, hello, Agent Foster.
126
00:04:51,776 --> 00:04:53,059
Hey, guys.
127
00:04:53,158 --> 00:04:55,658
I'm sure you're all pretty
surprised to see me here
128
00:04:55,699 --> 00:04:57,699
after last night's karaoke fiasco.
129
00:04:57,731 --> 00:04:59,298
Well, if it makes you feel any better,
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seeing you in that much pain
genuinely ruined my birthday.
131
00:05:02,211 --> 00:05:04,809
Yeah, well, you all
betrayed an orphan's trust.
132
00:05:04,872 --> 00:05:07,372
But I want you to know, it's
water under the bridge.
133
00:05:07,428 --> 00:05:10,296
Because I now realize why you did it.
134
00:05:10,783 --> 00:05:11,882
You do?
135
00:05:12,309 --> 00:05:14,489
You guys need answers from Walsh.
136
00:05:14,630 --> 00:05:19,566
And what's more, I realize
that Richard was right.
137
00:05:19,957 --> 00:05:22,200
Richard was right? About what?
138
00:05:22,291 --> 00:05:25,145
I've been right. What...
What was I right about?
139
00:05:25,240 --> 00:05:27,559
- That Walsh is a Reptilian.
- Mm-hmm.
140
00:05:27,651 --> 00:05:29,250
I've been doing a lot of research,
141
00:05:29,283 --> 00:05:31,207
and I'm sure I don't need
to tell Richard this,
142
00:05:31,301 --> 00:05:32,918
but he does fit the profile...
143
00:05:32,962 --> 00:05:35,429
Manipulative, emotionless,
sociopathic...
144
00:05:35,493 --> 00:05:38,082
Duplicitous, ego-driven. A life-ruiner.
145
00:05:38,147 --> 00:05:39,380
Yes, exactly.
146
00:05:39,405 --> 00:05:43,307
And it seems like sending
Ozzie off alone to find him
147
00:05:43,497 --> 00:05:44,872
was pretty foolish, guys.
148
00:05:44,912 --> 00:05:46,779
Dangerous, even.
149
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That's what I told them.
150
00:05:49,099 --> 00:05:50,637
I'd like to send him some backup.
151
00:05:50,662 --> 00:05:52,731
Do you guys know where he is?
152
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Hang on a sec.
153
00:05:54,418 --> 00:05:56,298
Just a few days ago, you
were rolling your eyes
154
00:05:56,334 --> 00:05:58,137
at my awesome alien experience.
155
00:05:58,198 --> 00:06:01,133
Now you're dropping mad
Reptilian knowledge?
156
00:06:01,158 --> 00:06:02,879
I'm honestly worried about Ozzie.
157
00:06:02,956 --> 00:06:04,663
And I'm starting to
feel like Richard and I
158
00:06:04,687 --> 00:06:07,668
are the only ones who actually
care about protecting him.
159
00:06:07,953 --> 00:06:11,755
That, and making sure Walsh
pays for his alien crimes.
160
00:06:11,930 --> 00:06:13,274
But if you don't know where he is,
161
00:06:13,298 --> 00:06:15,161
then I guess you don't know where he is.
162
00:06:15,204 --> 00:06:17,700
I don't know where he is, so, we...
we... You don't know.
163
00:06:17,762 --> 00:06:20,563
- No.
- We don't. Sorry. Can't help you.
164
00:06:20,901 --> 00:06:23,769
Well, then I guess Walsh wins.
165
00:06:23,920 --> 00:06:29,323
?
166
00:06:30,090 --> 00:06:32,223
[SIGHS] Come on, Richard.
167
00:06:34,520 --> 00:06:36,263
Hey, hey. No, no. A-Agent Foster!
168
00:06:36,301 --> 00:06:38,387
Stop, stop, stop. Stop.
169
00:06:38,824 --> 00:06:40,343
I think I know where Ozzie is.
170
00:06:40,369 --> 00:06:42,848
[GASPS] You do? Get in.
171
00:06:42,972 --> 00:06:45,039
[TIRES SCREECH]
172
00:06:45,324 --> 00:06:47,641
I bet you have a lot of questions.
173
00:06:48,239 --> 00:06:52,012
Yeah, but one is more
pressing than the others.
174
00:06:52,121 --> 00:06:53,854
I guess I'll just ask.
175
00:06:53,888 --> 00:06:55,922
Was Richard correct about you?
176
00:06:56,119 --> 00:06:57,581
- A-Are you a...
- A billionaire?
177
00:06:57,672 --> 00:06:58,801
Philanthropist? Pisces?
178
00:06:58,826 --> 00:06:59,925
Yes, to all three.
179
00:06:59,950 --> 00:07:01,957
No. I know you're a jerk.
180
00:07:03,182 --> 00:07:04,754
Look, are you...
181
00:07:04,859 --> 00:07:06,074
Yes?
182
00:07:07,168 --> 00:07:08,367
...Reptilian?
183
00:07:08,392 --> 00:07:10,325
Oh, yes. I'm also that.
184
00:07:11,770 --> 00:07:12,826
You don't look it.
185
00:07:12,851 --> 00:07:14,184
Well, that's on purpose.
186
00:07:14,263 --> 00:07:16,030
Yeah, you're gonna need to show me.
187
00:07:16,055 --> 00:07:18,262
But if I show you what I really am,
188
00:07:18,660 --> 00:07:20,254
that's all you'll ever see me as.
189
00:07:20,353 --> 00:07:23,454
Maybe. But I need to see. I need proof.
190
00:07:23,981 --> 00:07:25,699
Okay, all right.
191
00:07:26,882 --> 00:07:33,087
?
192
00:07:33,664 --> 00:07:35,331
We come in peace.
193
00:07:37,737 --> 00:07:39,737
Hey, I'm Snake Man.
194
00:07:39,888 --> 00:07:41,755
Are you a lizard, or are you a man?
195
00:07:42,017 --> 00:07:44,774
I like to think I'best of both worlds.
196
00:07:45,463 --> 00:07:47,196
Holy shit!
197
00:07:48,036 --> 00:07:49,064
Great news, sir.
198
00:07:49,089 --> 00:07:50,785
I found a courageous informant
199
00:07:50,810 --> 00:07:52,210
who's leading me straight to Walsh.
200
00:07:52,281 --> 00:07:53,681
JIM: Excellent work, Agent Foster.
201
00:07:53,849 --> 00:07:55,783
I look forward to seeing
Jonathan Walsh in cuffs
202
00:07:55,785 --> 00:07:57,117
in 20 hours.
203
00:07:59,221 --> 00:08:01,216
Yes, that's right, sir.
204
00:08:02,295 --> 00:08:03,761
Oh, the informant?
205
00:08:03,850 --> 00:08:05,350
He is a brave American.
206
00:08:07,763 --> 00:08:10,591
You know, courageous doesn't
even begin to describe this man.
207
00:08:10,700 --> 00:08:13,419
We're gonna bring down the
Reptilian agenda, sir!
208
00:08:13,502 --> 00:08:15,426
Medal of Honor?
209
00:08:15,872 --> 00:08:17,638
I will tell him.
210
00:08:17,707 --> 00:08:18,794
[EXHALES DEEPLY]
211
00:08:18,912 --> 00:08:19,989
[CELLPHONE BEEPS]
212
00:08:20,904 --> 00:08:23,247
- Did you hear that?
- Yes, I did.
213
00:08:23,485 --> 00:08:27,817
"Richard Eugene Clancy Schultz.
American Hero."
214
00:08:28,990 --> 00:08:30,557
God, that has a nice ring to it.
215
00:08:30,786 --> 00:08:32,319
Mm-hmm.
216
00:08:34,578 --> 00:08:36,613
She found Walsh.
217
00:08:37,552 --> 00:08:40,396
I'm sending you her
GPS tracker info now.
218
00:08:40,865 --> 00:08:43,199
Aah! Daah!
219
00:08:43,380 --> 00:08:46,130
- Are you okay, dude?
- No, I'm not okay, dude!
220
00:08:46,198 --> 00:08:47,934
You're a freakin' alien!
221
00:08:47,959 --> 00:08:49,099
Should I put this back on?
222
00:08:49,124 --> 00:08:50,763
I-It seems like it's freaking you out.
223
00:08:50,850 --> 00:08:54,231
Yeah, I'm freaking out!
What the hell is going on?!
224
00:08:54,532 --> 00:08:57,138
Why did you take me? Why
did you take the group?
225
00:08:57,172 --> 00:08:58,971
Ooh, how do I explain this?
226
00:08:58,996 --> 00:09:01,364
You know how when you're doing
a science experiment...
227
00:09:01,389 --> 00:09:03,355
We were a science experiment?
228
00:09:03,380 --> 00:09:07,215
Yes. We needed a random
cross-section of subjects
229
00:09:07,240 --> 00:09:09,474
to test so that we could
learn about humans.
230
00:09:09,499 --> 00:09:10,798
Who is "we"?
231
00:09:10,823 --> 00:09:14,792
"We" is the alliance between
Reptilians, Whites, and Greys.
232
00:09:14,817 --> 00:09:19,586
We've been working... together
to take over your planet.
233
00:09:19,735 --> 00:09:23,114
Wait, like an invasion?
How much time do we have?
234
00:09:23,355 --> 00:09:25,505
Oh, no. We've already invaded you.
235
00:09:25,647 --> 00:09:27,919
Think about it... Monsanto,
your Presidents.
236
00:09:27,944 --> 00:09:29,210
We got you guys looking at
237
00:09:29,235 --> 00:09:31,402
tiny, little screens 20 hours a day.
238
00:09:31,557 --> 00:09:33,395
We've been subverting you from within.
239
00:09:33,475 --> 00:09:34,993
- That's phase one.
- Phase one?
240
00:09:35,049 --> 00:09:36,395
How many phases are there?
241
00:09:36,420 --> 00:09:38,267
- Just two.
- What is phase two?
242
00:09:38,344 --> 00:09:40,396
Is it, like, harvesting our organs?
243
00:09:40,474 --> 00:09:41,560
Is it mind control?
244
00:09:41,585 --> 00:09:43,452
Are... Are you depleting
our planet's resources?
245
00:09:43,476 --> 00:09:44,509
What? Maybe.
246
00:09:44,534 --> 00:09:46,169
We haven't gotten our orders yet.
247
00:09:46,194 --> 00:09:48,428
But, yes, historically,
phase twos don't end well.
248
00:09:49,210 --> 00:09:51,498
That's why I need your help, Ozzie.
249
00:09:51,534 --> 00:09:54,301
We need to stop it. You're
the only one I can trust.
250
00:09:54,905 --> 00:09:57,326
[SCOFFS] You've lied to
me ever since I met you.
251
00:09:57,495 --> 00:10:00,529
You ruined my life, and
now you need my help?
252
00:10:01,890 --> 00:10:03,123
Yes?
253
00:10:04,635 --> 00:10:08,060
Look, I get that you
don't want to trust me,
254
00:10:08,222 --> 00:10:11,090
but, believe it or not,
we used to be friends.
255
00:10:11,170 --> 00:10:13,069
[CHUCKLES] We were never friends.
256
00:10:13,219 --> 00:10:15,219
I hated you the first time I met you.
257
00:10:15,323 --> 00:10:17,412
And now I know the reason why.
258
00:10:18,354 --> 00:10:20,155
Do you remember when you
were in seventh grade
259
00:10:20,179 --> 00:10:22,112
and those kids stole your yo-yo?
260
00:10:22,826 --> 00:10:30,550
?
261
00:10:30,831 --> 00:10:34,730
Why did those kids pick
on me and steal my yo-yo?
262
00:10:34,815 --> 00:10:36,147
I don't know.
263
00:10:36,172 --> 00:10:37,772
Some people are mean.
264
00:10:37,797 --> 00:10:39,196
You're not mean.
265
00:10:39,221 --> 00:10:40,788
Are we friends?
266
00:10:43,514 --> 00:10:45,069
- Excuse me.
- Uh, yeah?
267
00:10:45,545 --> 00:10:48,046
I think that yo-yo
belongs to someone else.
268
00:10:48,165 --> 00:10:49,300
No, it's mine.
269
00:10:49,325 --> 00:10:50,758
No, it's not.
270
00:10:51,093 --> 00:10:53,589
And you know what happens
to little kids who lie?
271
00:10:53,696 --> 00:10:54,829
What?
272
00:10:55,784 --> 00:10:57,237
Boo.
273
00:10:57,756 --> 00:10:58,955
Stay away from Ozzie!
274
00:10:59,067 --> 00:11:01,284
Unless you want to see me again.
275
00:11:02,733 --> 00:11:08,403
?
276
00:11:08,405 --> 00:11:10,560
[GASPS]
277
00:11:10,941 --> 00:11:14,076
- Did you ever get bullied after that?
- No.
278
00:11:14,101 --> 00:11:15,568
What about when you were
in journalism school
279
00:11:15,592 --> 00:11:17,625
and you were living in
that two-bedroom apartment
280
00:11:17,650 --> 00:11:19,967
on the water for $500 a month?
281
00:11:20,025 --> 00:11:21,256
You were my landlord?
282
00:11:21,281 --> 00:11:23,948
I sold that building for
a boatload of profit
283
00:11:23,973 --> 00:11:25,506
after you left.
284
00:11:26,005 --> 00:11:28,365
And I want to show you something.
285
00:11:28,777 --> 00:11:32,312
I've been carrying this
with me for 30 years.
286
00:11:32,963 --> 00:11:37,906
?
287
00:11:38,054 --> 00:11:39,420
I need your help, Ozzie.
288
00:11:39,462 --> 00:11:41,896
I want to blow the whistle
on this alien thing.
289
00:11:42,241 --> 00:11:44,608
You're willing to do that?
290
00:11:44,806 --> 00:11:47,124
Over the years we abducted you,
291
00:11:47,149 --> 00:11:49,883
I started to feel empathy.
292
00:11:49,908 --> 00:11:52,874
You made me understand
what it means to be human.
293
00:11:53,081 --> 00:11:56,082
So, yeah, I want to do that.
294
00:12:04,799 --> 00:12:07,166
Okay, so, what is the plan?
295
00:12:07,353 --> 00:12:09,201
Um, do you have a spare gun?
296
00:12:09,455 --> 00:12:11,804
I actually have a
compromised index finger.
297
00:12:11,806 --> 00:12:14,696
[GUN COCKS] I usually fly solo,
but I'll need a partner now,
298
00:12:14,721 --> 00:12:15,954
so I'm gonna deputize you.
299
00:12:15,956 --> 00:12:17,939
- Raise your hand.
- [SIGHING] Okay.
300
00:12:17,988 --> 00:12:19,187
Are you willing to do this?
301
00:12:19,244 --> 00:12:20,799
Yeah. Anything for America.
302
00:12:20,824 --> 00:12:22,123
I hereby declare that...
303
00:12:22,148 --> 00:12:24,215
I hereby declare that I, Ri...
304
00:12:24,240 --> 00:12:26,206
Wait. Ow! W-W-What are you doing? Ow!
305
00:12:26,274 --> 00:12:27,839
I'm gonna leave you in
here while I arrest Walsh.
306
00:12:27,863 --> 00:12:28,902
Wait. Why?
307
00:12:28,927 --> 00:12:30,633
Because I'm an FBI agent and you're not.
308
00:12:30,658 --> 00:12:32,991
No, I'm the one who
brought you to Walsh.
309
00:12:33,039 --> 00:12:35,041
It's only fair that I'm the
one who brings him down.
310
00:12:35,065 --> 00:12:38,734
I'm doing this to protect you.
You did the right thing.
311
00:12:43,150 --> 00:12:49,888
?
312
00:12:49,890 --> 00:12:56,661
?
313
00:12:57,965 --> 00:13:01,230
How do we blow this
incredibly weird whistle?
314
00:13:01,280 --> 00:13:03,046
Well, it won't be easy.
315
00:13:03,103 --> 00:13:04,336
You're not the only one
316
00:13:04,338 --> 00:13:06,675
who's working for a
Reptilian media mogul.
317
00:13:07,019 --> 00:13:08,506
- Rupert Murdoch?
- Uh-huh.
318
00:13:08,508 --> 00:13:09,949
- Zuckerberg?
- Yep.
319
00:13:09,984 --> 00:13:11,817
- NPR?
- We're everywhere.
320
00:13:11,945 --> 00:13:14,846
But there are other
Reptilians like me...
321
00:13:14,910 --> 00:13:16,832
Human sympathizers, who have gone rogue.
322
00:13:16,888 --> 00:13:18,527
We need to find them.
323
00:13:19,090 --> 00:13:20,988
Actually, I know another group
324
00:13:21,013 --> 00:13:22,574
who would like to expose the truth.
325
00:13:22,599 --> 00:13:24,165
StarCrossed?
326
00:13:24,315 --> 00:13:25,800
Do you think they would trust me?
327
00:13:25,825 --> 00:13:27,191
I don't know.
328
00:13:27,216 --> 00:13:28,148
Maybe I could do the
face thing for them.
329
00:13:28,231 --> 00:13:30,231
No! N-No.
330
00:13:30,295 --> 00:13:31,871
Look, I...
331
00:13:32,201 --> 00:13:33,700
You know what? I'll talk to them.
332
00:13:33,725 --> 00:13:34,724
They trust me,
333
00:13:34,749 --> 00:13:36,883
and I'll tell them to trust you.
334
00:13:37,285 --> 00:13:39,730
So, does this mean we're friends?
335
00:13:40,107 --> 00:13:42,818
?
336
00:13:42,943 --> 00:13:44,794
Jonathan Walsh, you're under arrest.
337
00:13:44,843 --> 00:13:47,450
I'm Special Agent Alex
Foster with the FBI.
338
00:13:47,564 --> 00:13:49,665
Ozzie, step away. Walsh,
get on the ground.
339
00:13:49,690 --> 00:13:50,881
You said you weren't bringing her.
340
00:13:50,905 --> 00:13:52,238
- I didn't.
- That's right.
341
00:13:52,414 --> 00:13:54,029
The FBI doesn't always need help
342
00:13:54,054 --> 00:13:55,264
when it comes to catching criminals.
343
00:13:55,288 --> 00:13:57,997
Alex, you don't understand. This
goes way deeper than Walsh.
344
00:13:58,022 --> 00:13:59,169
We'll see how deep it goes
345
00:13:59,194 --> 00:14:02,629
when I drag his white-collar
butt to prison.
346
00:14:02,999 --> 00:14:05,060
It's too late. They already found me.
347
00:14:05,085 --> 00:14:07,319
That's right. I did find you.
348
00:14:07,472 --> 00:14:09,613
And there is something I've
been wanting to say to you
349
00:14:09,637 --> 00:14:11,703
for a very long time.
350
00:14:11,783 --> 00:14:13,045
You have the right to remain...
351
00:14:13,070 --> 00:14:14,256
Alex, there's someone behind you.
352
00:14:14,343 --> 00:14:15,811
Oh, there's someone behind me, Ozzie?
353
00:14:15,835 --> 00:14:17,872
How stupid do you think I am?
354
00:14:19,033 --> 00:14:22,020
Pretty stupid. Okay, I'll take this.
355
00:14:23,551 --> 00:14:25,250
You don't know who you're messing with.
356
00:14:25,275 --> 00:14:26,942
FYI, it's the FBI.
357
00:14:27,054 --> 00:14:30,318
Okay, well, I'm a Russian
agent for the FSB.
358
00:14:30,413 --> 00:14:32,713
And the oligarchs that Walsh ripped off,
359
00:14:32,926 --> 00:14:35,427
they want him back in Russia.
360
00:14:35,646 --> 00:14:38,849
_
361
00:14:39,006 --> 00:14:41,904
_
362
00:14:42,302 --> 00:14:44,469
?
363
00:14:44,912 --> 00:14:47,115
Russia's where you've been
hiding all your money, Walsh?
364
00:14:47,139 --> 00:14:48,834
- No, that's not true!
- It is.
365
00:14:48,909 --> 00:14:50,124
- What are you doing?
- And that's where he's gonna pay
366
00:14:50,148 --> 00:14:51,607
- for his crimes.
- Come on, man.
367
00:14:51,632 --> 00:14:53,282
What the hell are you doing?
368
00:14:53,284 --> 00:14:55,417
He's my collar. You have
no jurisdiction here.
369
00:14:55,490 --> 00:14:58,795
_
370
00:14:58,834 --> 00:15:01,795
_
371
00:15:02,881 --> 00:15:04,373
_
372
00:15:04,459 --> 00:15:05,881
_
373
00:15:06,255 --> 00:15:07,513
_
374
00:15:08,139 --> 00:15:09,483
_
375
00:15:09,567 --> 00:15:11,600
Un-cuff me immediately.
376
00:15:11,724 --> 00:15:14,303
Do you want to start
another Cold War, buster?!
377
00:15:14,568 --> 00:15:16,438
Shut up. Let's go.
378
00:15:17,029 --> 00:15:19,122
Why would you take Ozzie?
He's not wanted for anything.
379
00:15:19,146 --> 00:15:22,177
He's not wanted for anything...
in America.
380
00:15:22,318 --> 00:15:23,712
I've never been to Russia!
381
00:15:23,880 --> 00:15:25,981
We'll leave that for the
Russian courts to decide.
382
00:15:26,232 --> 00:15:30,152
This is so not good for
Russian-American relations!
383
00:15:30,349 --> 00:15:32,683
[VEHICLE APPROACHING]
384
00:15:34,992 --> 00:15:37,192
Ozzie? Walsh?!
385
00:15:37,241 --> 00:15:39,128
Who's that other guy?
386
00:15:39,296 --> 00:15:40,395
[HORN HONKING] Aah!
387
00:15:40,531 --> 00:15:42,197
They're getting away!
388
00:15:42,968 --> 00:15:44,507
Ow! This hurts so much!
389
00:15:44,614 --> 00:15:46,447
[HONKING CONTINUES]
390
00:15:46,637 --> 00:15:49,238
[WHIRRING]
391
00:15:51,031 --> 00:15:53,675
[GRUNTING]
392
00:15:54,140 --> 00:16:03,685
?
393
00:16:03,687 --> 00:16:08,557
?
394
00:16:09,105 --> 00:16:11,093
Hey! Oh, thank God. Can you help me?
395
00:16:11,238 --> 00:16:12,535
Are you sure?
396
00:16:12,563 --> 00:16:14,930
I don't want to assume you
can't rescue yourself.
397
00:16:15,293 --> 00:16:16,629
I just said "help me."
398
00:16:17,519 --> 00:16:20,502
?
399
00:16:21,526 --> 00:16:23,993
Wait. Wait a minute. Hold on. Hold on!
400
00:16:24,141 --> 00:16:26,074
- You're liberated.
- Thanks.
401
00:16:26,152 --> 00:16:27,949
You're welcome, sister.
402
00:16:28,458 --> 00:16:31,492
?
403
00:16:31,659 --> 00:16:32,691
Nancy?
404
00:16:32,716 --> 00:16:35,184
Nancy! I-I-It's Richard from group!
405
00:16:35,519 --> 00:16:37,824
Please wave to me if that's you!
406
00:16:38,189 --> 00:16:39,521
[TIRES SQUEAL]
407
00:16:39,926 --> 00:16:42,324
Hey, uh... murderer?
408
00:16:42,465 --> 00:16:44,933
Can I have a chocolate before I die?
409
00:16:45,762 --> 00:16:47,062
Yeah, you can have a chocolate.
410
00:16:47,254 --> 00:16:50,363
Hey, Jonathan, can you pass
me one of those chocolates?
411
00:16:50,652 --> 00:16:51,684
A chocolate?
412
00:16:51,709 --> 00:16:54,544
Yeah, one of Yvonne's chocolates.
413
00:16:54,672 --> 00:16:56,038
It's in that bag by your feet.
414
00:16:56,063 --> 00:16:57,929
Oh. Oh, yeah.
415
00:17:00,744 --> 00:17:02,957
I'll take one of those chocolates...
416
00:17:03,230 --> 00:17:05,180
and the gun.
417
00:17:05,298 --> 00:17:07,398
- Th-The gun?
- Slowly.
418
00:17:13,715 --> 00:17:16,223
And now I'll have one of
those chocolates, please.
419
00:17:16,327 --> 00:17:17,893
No coconut.
420
00:17:19,948 --> 00:17:21,314
Did I just see Nancy?
421
00:17:21,465 --> 00:17:23,198
Who? The woman with the axe.
422
00:17:23,276 --> 00:17:24,566
She looked like Nancy!
423
00:17:24,753 --> 00:17:26,401
But sh-she blew up.
424
00:17:26,470 --> 00:17:28,814
Well, then, we both
know that's impossible.
425
00:17:28,878 --> 00:17:31,065
- Where'd they go?
- Maybe Gina's right.
426
00:17:31,330 --> 00:17:32,529
Maybe I'm just blaming Walsh
427
00:17:32,554 --> 00:17:34,925
for things that didn't really happen.
428
00:17:35,026 --> 00:17:37,446
Maybe Walsh is just a
charming, good-looking man.
429
00:17:37,448 --> 00:17:39,737
A charming, good-looking
criminal, Richard.
430
00:17:39,766 --> 00:17:40,799
Now focus!
431
00:17:40,871 --> 00:17:42,204
[ENGINE STARTS]
432
00:17:42,253 --> 00:17:46,388
?
433
00:17:46,468 --> 00:17:48,490
- [GUN WHIRS]
- Just a little bit further.
434
00:17:48,530 --> 00:17:50,663
To your deaths.
435
00:17:50,725 --> 00:17:52,337
- Ozzie, yell at me.
- What?
436
00:17:52,363 --> 00:17:53,850
Yell at me, and then punch me.
437
00:17:53,875 --> 00:17:55,041
Just follow my lead.
438
00:17:55,105 --> 00:17:56,771
This is all your fault!
439
00:17:57,222 --> 00:17:58,788
What? You're the reason I'm here,
440
00:17:58,813 --> 00:18:01,321
you scaly, billionaire asshole!
441
00:18:01,346 --> 00:18:03,379
Oh, yeah? Well, you're
a hipster asshole!
442
00:18:03,404 --> 00:18:05,825
And your abduction is the most
interesting thing about you.
443
00:18:05,850 --> 00:18:08,320
You think you're so fancy
with your pour-over coffee
444
00:18:08,345 --> 00:18:09,277
and your fixed-gear bike?
445
00:18:09,302 --> 00:18:11,790
- Well, you're not.
- Well, you suck as an alien
446
00:18:12,036 --> 00:18:14,202
and you suck even more as a human being.
447
00:18:14,251 --> 00:18:15,954
Well, at least my parents
aren't divorced.
448
00:18:15,979 --> 00:18:17,851
- Ohh!
- [GRUNTS]
449
00:18:18,194 --> 00:18:19,672
Just shoot this human now.
450
00:18:19,726 --> 00:18:21,195
- I will, but...
- No. Shoot him.
451
00:18:21,220 --> 00:18:23,124
- He's the traitor.
- Don't tell me how to do my job.
452
00:18:23,231 --> 00:18:25,266
- Ozzie, now!
- I want you to...
453
00:18:25,396 --> 00:18:26,396
[GUNSHOT]
454
00:18:26,532 --> 00:18:28,263
[GRUNTS]
455
00:18:28,477 --> 00:18:34,870
?
456
00:18:35,259 --> 00:18:36,558
Agh!
457
00:18:38,187 --> 00:18:40,588
Is it possible my marriage
was just falling apart?
458
00:18:40,613 --> 00:18:42,901
That it was my fault? That
I was never abducted?
459
00:18:42,955 --> 00:18:44,554
Richard, pull it together.
460
00:18:44,579 --> 00:18:46,192
Okay, I'm coming to a fork in the road.
461
00:18:46,217 --> 00:18:47,382
Should we go left or right?
462
00:18:47,408 --> 00:18:49,526
"Two roads in the woods, diverged,
463
00:18:49,559 --> 00:18:51,501
and I took... I took the road less..."
464
00:18:51,526 --> 00:18:53,092
Richard! The left!
465
00:18:53,375 --> 00:18:55,323
Or maybe it's right.
466
00:18:57,424 --> 00:18:59,123
Please don't leave me in here!
467
00:18:59,540 --> 00:19:03,149
?
468
00:19:03,297 --> 00:19:04,897
[RUSTLE]
469
00:19:07,743 --> 00:19:08,758
[GUN WHIRS]
470
00:19:08,783 --> 00:19:10,618
Hang on, hang on. Let's talk about this.
471
00:19:10,689 --> 00:19:12,790
No. You betrayed us.
472
00:19:12,827 --> 00:19:14,226
And you got weak, Walsh.
473
00:19:14,329 --> 00:19:15,329
[GUN COCKS]
474
00:19:15,408 --> 00:19:17,075
And the weak must die.
475
00:19:18,849 --> 00:19:20,549
[GUN WHIRS]
476
00:19:20,774 --> 00:19:24,820
?
477
00:19:34,582 --> 00:19:36,206
Ozzie?
478
00:19:36,613 --> 00:19:38,277
Ozzie, what happened? Are you okay?
479
00:19:38,307 --> 00:19:40,707
Walsh. Where's Walsh?
480
00:19:41,639 --> 00:19:43,206
It's... It's just us.
481
00:19:43,247 --> 00:19:45,180
[WEAKLY] Trust Walsh.
482
00:19:45,292 --> 00:19:47,081
Ozzie, it's okay. I'll get help.
483
00:19:47,557 --> 00:19:49,042
He has the truth.
484
00:19:49,722 --> 00:19:51,489
Find the others.
485
00:19:51,812 --> 00:19:54,199
[WHIRRING]
486
00:19:54,709 --> 00:19:56,209
Ah.
487
00:20:04,005 --> 00:20:05,572
[SIGHS]
488
00:20:06,443 --> 00:20:09,501
?
489
00:20:09,704 --> 00:20:11,306
Ozzie?
490
00:20:13,392 --> 00:20:15,330
Ozzie?!
491
00:20:16,720 --> 00:20:18,886
- [SIGHS]
- [RUSTLE]
492
00:20:19,048 --> 00:20:28,079
?
493
00:20:28,296 --> 00:20:33,296
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494
00:20:33,346 --> 00:20:37,896
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