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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,169 --> 00:00:06,006 ♪ The Simpsons ♪ 2 00:01:05,565 --> 00:01:07,734 Aah! 3 00:01:21,664 --> 00:01:25,543 Hey, kids, it's story time. 4 00:01:25,627 --> 00:01:30,048 I'm gonna tell you the story of Krusty's expensive new suit. 5 00:01:30,131 --> 00:01:32,217 His sexual harassment suit! 6 00:01:33,301 --> 00:01:35,011 Boy... 7 00:01:35,095 --> 00:01:37,680 Anyway, as part of Krusty's plea bargain, 8 00:01:37,764 --> 00:01:39,557 he has a new court-ordered sidekick, 9 00:01:39,641 --> 00:01:41,684 Ms. No-means-no. 10 00:01:41,768 --> 00:01:44,312 Whoa, you're hot! 11 00:01:44,395 --> 00:01:46,064 Let's get some dinner after the show. 12 00:01:47,899 --> 00:01:49,567 I have dinner with all my employees, 13 00:01:49,651 --> 00:01:51,027 right, Sideshow Mel? 14 00:01:51,111 --> 00:01:52,987 We've never spoken outside of work. 15 00:01:56,366 --> 00:01:57,867 I'm surprised he doesn't try 16 00:01:57,951 --> 00:01:59,831 to blame his problems on his Percodan addiction. 17 00:01:59,911 --> 00:02:02,080 It wasn't my fault. It was the Percodan. 18 00:02:02,163 --> 00:02:04,999 If you ask me, that stuff rots your brain. 19 00:02:05,083 --> 00:02:06,960 And now a word from our new sponsor. 20 00:02:07,043 --> 00:02:10,964 Percodan?! Aw, crap! 21 00:02:11,047 --> 00:02:13,258 Bart, are you ready for your history test? 22 00:02:13,341 --> 00:02:15,135 You bet, Mom. Ask me anything. 23 00:02:15,218 --> 00:02:18,012 Okay. Who was George Washington Carver? 24 00:02:18,096 --> 00:02:21,766 Um... the guy who chopped up George Washington? 25 00:02:21,850 --> 00:02:23,685 Really? Wow. 26 00:02:36,156 --> 00:02:37,866 Bart, you said you were going to study. 27 00:02:37,949 --> 00:02:39,993 My stomach. 28 00:02:40,076 --> 00:02:42,078 You just don't want to take that test. 29 00:02:42,162 --> 00:02:44,205 No, I mean it. It really hurts. 30 00:02:44,289 --> 00:02:46,082 Mom, I think he's serious. 31 00:02:46,166 --> 00:02:48,334 Kids are so naive. 32 00:02:48,418 --> 00:02:49,752 Lisa, when you get to be our age, 33 00:02:49,836 --> 00:02:51,129 you'll learn a few things. 34 00:02:51,212 --> 00:02:53,756 Like when a sign says, "Do not feed the bears," 35 00:02:53,840 --> 00:02:56,593 man, you'd better not feed the bears. 36 00:02:56,676 --> 00:02:58,428 Now get to school, boy. 37 00:03:02,015 --> 00:03:03,492 Mrs. Krabappel, I can't take the test. 38 00:03:03,516 --> 00:03:04,893 I have a stomachache. 39 00:03:04,976 --> 00:03:08,897 Well, that's a lame excuse for an excuse. Ha! 40 00:03:08,980 --> 00:03:10,815 Look, if you ignore me and I die, 41 00:03:10,899 --> 00:03:12,400 you'll get in a lot of trouble. 42 00:03:12,483 --> 00:03:15,111 Read page six of the school charter. 43 00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:17,113 "No teacher shall be held accountable 44 00:03:17,197 --> 00:03:19,199 if Bart Simpson dies." 45 00:03:19,282 --> 00:03:22,368 We're also absolved if Milhouse gets eaten by the school snake. 46 00:03:22,452 --> 00:03:25,580 Hey, cool, there's a rabbit in here. 47 00:03:27,749 --> 00:03:30,001 Mrs. Krabappel, I'm done failing the test. 48 00:03:30,084 --> 00:03:32,295 Can I please go to the nurse? 49 00:03:32,378 --> 00:03:34,714 Gosh, Bart, maybe you really are in pain. 50 00:03:34,797 --> 00:03:36,841 Well, it would be cruel not to let you go. 51 00:03:36,925 --> 00:03:41,721 ♪♪ 52 00:03:41,804 --> 00:03:44,599 ♪♪ 53 00:03:48,436 --> 00:03:49,436 Now you may go. 54 00:03:51,105 --> 00:03:52,398 Lunch lady Doris? 55 00:03:52,482 --> 00:03:54,609 - Why are you here? - Budget cuts. 56 00:03:54,692 --> 00:03:56,128 They've even got groundskeeper Willie 57 00:03:56,152 --> 00:03:57,779 teaching French. 58 00:03:57,862 --> 00:03:59,781 Bonjour, 59 00:03:59,864 --> 00:04:02,158 you cheese-eatin' surrender monkeys. 60 00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:04,661 Look, my stomach really hurts. 61 00:04:04,744 --> 00:04:07,747 All I can give you are these chewable Prozac for kids. 62 00:04:07,830 --> 00:04:08,748 Your choice... 63 00:04:08,831 --> 00:04:09,874 Manic-depressive mouse 64 00:04:09,958 --> 00:04:12,293 or the bluebird of unhappiness. 65 00:04:13,920 --> 00:04:15,397 Superintendent Chalmers, I'd like you to meet 66 00:04:15,421 --> 00:04:17,215 our new school nurse, lunch lady Doris. 67 00:04:17,298 --> 00:04:19,884 Yeah, nice to see you. Seymour, why is that student 68 00:04:19,968 --> 00:04:21,594 lying unconscious on the floor? 69 00:04:21,678 --> 00:04:24,180 Well, in many cases, the floor is the bes... 70 00:04:24,264 --> 00:04:26,808 Look, here comes Lumpy, the school snake. 71 00:04:26,891 --> 00:04:29,060 Help! Help! 72 00:04:29,143 --> 00:04:31,020 Lord. 73 00:04:33,898 --> 00:04:36,567 ♪♪ 74 00:04:38,278 --> 00:04:41,030 Don't worry, son. You'll be fine. 75 00:04:41,114 --> 00:04:44,033 This boy's appendix is inflamed and about to burst, 76 00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:46,744 which will make it easier to find once I get in there. 77 00:04:49,497 --> 00:04:51,749 Man, these are primo seats. 78 00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:53,751 I could really go for a hot dog. 79 00:04:53,835 --> 00:04:55,878 Homer, this is an operation. 80 00:04:55,962 --> 00:04:56,962 Hot dogs! 81 00:04:57,005 --> 00:04:58,047 Get your hot dogs here! 82 00:04:58,131 --> 00:04:59,215 Whoo-hoo! 83 00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:02,051 Okay, Bart, I will count to three, 84 00:05:02,135 --> 00:05:04,137 and you will be sound asleep. 85 00:05:04,220 --> 00:05:07,015 One, two, three. 86 00:05:07,098 --> 00:05:08,766 Out like a light. 87 00:05:08,850 --> 00:05:10,310 Scalpel. 88 00:05:11,436 --> 00:05:12,895 Oopsie. 89 00:05:12,979 --> 00:05:16,024 Maybe if I fiddle with these knobs. 90 00:05:16,107 --> 00:05:18,401 Hey, I smell gas. 91 00:05:18,484 --> 00:05:20,445 Pleasant gas. 92 00:05:20,528 --> 00:05:22,864 Night-night gas. 93 00:05:25,950 --> 00:05:28,161 How's my special little guy? 94 00:05:28,244 --> 00:05:30,997 How you feeling, big brother? 95 00:05:31,080 --> 00:05:32,790 This is wonderful. 96 00:05:32,874 --> 00:05:33,874 You're alive. 97 00:05:33,916 --> 00:05:35,418 No thanks to you, Homer. 98 00:05:35,501 --> 00:05:37,045 Why, you little...! 99 00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:41,591 Now, Homer, please. 100 00:05:41,674 --> 00:05:43,801 The boy's just had a very serious operation. 101 00:05:43,885 --> 00:05:45,011 Right. 102 00:05:45,094 --> 00:05:48,056 Now, Bart, I found the culprit... 103 00:05:48,139 --> 00:05:50,808 A jagged metal cereal "O." 104 00:05:50,892 --> 00:05:53,311 Wicked! I got this cool scar 105 00:05:53,394 --> 00:05:55,146 and I get to miss a week of school. 106 00:05:56,481 --> 00:05:59,108 Dr. Hibbert, can I have my appendix out? 107 00:05:59,192 --> 00:06:01,152 - Yeah, me, too. - I want mine out first. 108 00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:04,989 Why not? Follow me, kids. 109 00:06:05,073 --> 00:06:07,116 Nurse, prep these children. 110 00:06:08,451 --> 00:06:10,578 I'm glad you're okay, Bart. 111 00:06:13,331 --> 00:06:15,041 ♪♪ 112 00:06:21,381 --> 00:06:23,091 Bleeding Gums Murphy! 113 00:06:23,174 --> 00:06:24,759 Little Lisa, 114 00:06:24,842 --> 00:06:26,511 it's good to see ya again. 115 00:06:26,594 --> 00:06:28,513 It's been a long time. 116 00:06:28,596 --> 00:06:30,473 ♪♪ 117 00:06:30,556 --> 00:06:32,809 My friends call me Bleeding Gums. 118 00:06:32,892 --> 00:06:34,769 Eww! How'd you get a name like that? 119 00:06:34,852 --> 00:06:38,147 Well, let me put it this way... You ever been to the dentist? 120 00:06:38,231 --> 00:06:39,357 - Yeah. - Not me. 121 00:06:39,440 --> 00:06:41,734 I suppose I should go to one, 122 00:06:41,818 --> 00:06:44,278 but I got enough pain in my life as it is. 123 00:06:45,196 --> 00:06:46,489 What are you here for? 124 00:06:46,572 --> 00:06:48,491 My brother just had his appendix out. 125 00:06:48,574 --> 00:06:49,867 Is he gonna be okay? 126 00:06:49,951 --> 00:06:52,078 Hello, I'm Dr. Cheeks. 127 00:06:52,161 --> 00:06:54,455 I'm doing my rounds, and I'm a little behind. 128 00:06:54,539 --> 00:06:56,624 He'll be fine. 129 00:06:58,793 --> 00:07:01,879 Lisa, I sure am glad you dropped by. 130 00:07:01,963 --> 00:07:03,631 You're the first visitor I've had. 131 00:07:03,714 --> 00:07:05,049 What about your family? 132 00:07:05,133 --> 00:07:06,884 I don't really have a family. 133 00:07:06,968 --> 00:07:10,304 All I had was a little brother who grew up to become a doctor. 134 00:07:10,388 --> 00:07:12,932 He used to laugh at the most inappropriate times. 135 00:07:14,892 --> 00:07:16,745 Hey, I've got an older brother that I'll never see. 136 00:07:16,769 --> 00:07:19,063 He's a jazz musician, or some such. 137 00:07:19,147 --> 00:07:20,606 Well. Bye-bye. 138 00:07:20,690 --> 00:07:23,317 It must be awful to be all alone in the world. 139 00:07:23,401 --> 00:07:25,486 Well, I always had my music. 140 00:07:25,570 --> 00:07:28,406 I learned at the feet of Blind Willie Witherspoon. 141 00:07:30,616 --> 00:07:32,660 I've been playing jazz for 30 years, 142 00:07:32,743 --> 00:07:34,370 and I just can't make a go of it. 143 00:07:34,454 --> 00:07:36,414 I want you to have my saxophone. 144 00:07:36,497 --> 00:07:39,459 This isn't a saxophone. It's an umbrella. 145 00:07:39,542 --> 00:07:41,711 So I've been playing an umbrella for 30 years? 146 00:07:41,794 --> 00:07:43,296 Why didn't anybody tell me? 147 00:07:43,379 --> 00:07:46,466 We all thought it was funny. 148 00:07:46,549 --> 00:07:48,384 That's not funny. 149 00:07:48,468 --> 00:07:49,677 Then I got my big break. 150 00:07:49,760 --> 00:07:51,512 I was on "Steve Allen's Tonight Show." 151 00:07:53,556 --> 00:07:56,350 Now, a brilliant jazz musician 152 00:07:56,434 --> 00:07:59,353 who's inspired me to do some improv poetry. 153 00:07:59,437 --> 00:08:01,355 "Twinkle, twinkle, groovy cat, 154 00:08:01,439 --> 00:08:02,648 "how I wonder where you at. 155 00:08:02,732 --> 00:08:04,317 "I really love the way you cook. 156 00:08:04,400 --> 00:08:05,669 Just like me when I wrote this book." 157 00:08:05,693 --> 00:08:07,278 "How To Make Love To Steve Allen." 158 00:08:07,361 --> 00:08:08,404 From the author of... 159 00:08:11,741 --> 00:08:12,741 and... 160 00:08:15,119 --> 00:08:16,871 I cut my first and only album: 161 00:08:16,954 --> 00:08:18,623 "Sax on the Beach." 162 00:08:18,706 --> 00:08:23,211 But then I spent all my money on my $1,500-a-day habit. 163 00:08:24,837 --> 00:08:27,465 I'd like another Faberge egg, please? 164 00:08:27,548 --> 00:08:29,467 Sir, don't you think you've had enough? 165 00:08:29,550 --> 00:08:31,344 I'll tell you when I've had enough! 166 00:08:33,721 --> 00:08:35,598 When was the last time you worked? 167 00:08:35,681 --> 00:08:38,976 In '86, when I did a guest shot on "The Cosby Show." 168 00:08:40,770 --> 00:08:41,687 Hey, kids. 169 00:08:41,771 --> 00:08:44,232 Meet Grandpa Murphy. 170 00:08:44,315 --> 00:08:46,692 But we have three grandpas already. 171 00:08:46,776 --> 00:08:49,237 This one's a great jazz musician. 172 00:08:49,320 --> 00:08:51,072 They all are. 173 00:08:51,155 --> 00:08:53,658 You see, the kids... 174 00:08:53,741 --> 00:08:55,785 They listen to the rap music 175 00:08:55,868 --> 00:08:58,246 which gives them the brain damage 176 00:08:58,329 --> 00:09:00,790 with their hippin' and their hoppin' 177 00:09:00,873 --> 00:09:02,625 and the bippin' and the boppin'. 178 00:09:02,708 --> 00:09:06,462 So they don't know what the jazz is all about. 179 00:09:06,546 --> 00:09:09,757 You see, jazz is like a Jell-O pudding pop. 180 00:09:09,840 --> 00:09:12,969 No. Actually, it's more like Kodak film. 181 00:09:13,052 --> 00:09:16,389 No. Actually, jazz is like the new Coke. 182 00:09:16,472 --> 00:09:18,349 It'll be around forever. 183 00:09:21,352 --> 00:09:23,396 Wow! You've had some career. 184 00:09:23,479 --> 00:09:25,022 Although the moral seems to be 185 00:09:25,106 --> 00:09:27,441 that a lifetime of jazz leaves you sad and lonely. 186 00:09:27,525 --> 00:09:30,278 Well, before you came to visit, 187 00:09:30,361 --> 00:09:31,988 I would have agreed with you. 188 00:09:34,282 --> 00:09:35,950 This just in. 189 00:09:36,033 --> 00:09:37,994 Krusty The Clown staged a press conference today 190 00:09:38,077 --> 00:09:40,329 to defend himself against charges 191 00:09:40,413 --> 00:09:41,706 that his products are unsafe, 192 00:09:41,789 --> 00:09:43,165 his theme park is a deathtrap 193 00:09:43,249 --> 00:09:44,875 and that he's marketing videos 194 00:09:44,959 --> 00:09:47,878 of Tonya Harding's wedding night. 195 00:09:47,962 --> 00:09:50,715 And I contend that those tourists were decapitated 196 00:09:50,798 --> 00:09:52,842 before they entered the Krustyland House of Knives. 197 00:09:52,925 --> 00:09:54,552 Next question. 198 00:09:54,635 --> 00:09:56,804 What about that little boy who got appendicitis 199 00:09:56,887 --> 00:09:59,473 from eating your cereal? 200 00:09:59,557 --> 00:10:01,684 To prove that this metal "O" is harmless, 201 00:10:01,767 --> 00:10:04,103 I will personally eat one. 202 00:10:04,186 --> 00:10:06,105 See, there's nothing... 203 00:10:09,900 --> 00:10:11,861 Boy! 204 00:10:11,944 --> 00:10:14,280 This thing is shredding my insides! 205 00:10:14,363 --> 00:10:16,407 Krusty, that wasn't the metal one. 206 00:10:16,490 --> 00:10:18,326 That was a regular Krusty "O." 207 00:10:18,409 --> 00:10:19,702 It's poison. 208 00:10:21,579 --> 00:10:23,539 So, you all set for your recital? 209 00:10:23,623 --> 00:10:24,540 I sure am! 210 00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:25,666 Look! 211 00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:26,768 I stopped brushing my teeth 212 00:10:26,792 --> 00:10:28,586 so I can play just like you. 213 00:10:28,669 --> 00:10:30,296 Aw. Lisa, honey, 214 00:10:30,379 --> 00:10:32,548 music comes from what's in your heart, 215 00:10:32,632 --> 00:10:34,091 not what's on your teeth. 216 00:10:34,175 --> 00:10:35,760 Come on. Let's jam. 217 00:10:35,843 --> 00:10:37,678 ♪♪ 218 00:10:37,762 --> 00:10:41,557 ♪ Lift me, won't you lift me ♪ 219 00:10:41,641 --> 00:10:45,853 ♪ Above the old routine? ♪ 220 00:10:45,936 --> 00:10:47,855 ♪ Make it nice ♪ 221 00:10:47,938 --> 00:10:50,149 ♪ Play it clean ♪ 222 00:10:50,232 --> 00:10:53,736 ♪ Jazzman ♪ 223 00:10:54,820 --> 00:10:57,698 ♪♪ 224 00:11:01,327 --> 00:11:05,414 ♪ When the jazzman's testifying ♪ 225 00:11:05,498 --> 00:11:09,001 ♪ A faithless man believes ♪ 226 00:11:09,085 --> 00:11:13,631 ♪ We can sing you into paradise ♪ 227 00:11:13,714 --> 00:11:17,343 ♪ Or bring you to your knees ♪ 228 00:11:18,511 --> 00:11:21,722 ♪ Jazzman ♪ 229 00:11:21,806 --> 00:11:25,935 ♪ Jazzman ♪ 230 00:11:26,018 --> 00:11:28,062 ♪♪ 231 00:11:30,731 --> 00:11:34,026 Hey, Moe, what'll you give me for an A.A. chip? 232 00:11:34,110 --> 00:11:36,529 Barney, this is a five-minute chip. 233 00:11:36,612 --> 00:11:38,364 It's worth the Pabst. 234 00:11:38,447 --> 00:11:42,368 ♪♪ 235 00:11:42,451 --> 00:11:44,870 Baby, you are gonna knock 'em dead. 236 00:11:47,206 --> 00:11:49,583 Here... take this for luck. 237 00:11:49,667 --> 00:11:51,419 Your sax! 238 00:11:51,502 --> 00:11:53,546 Thank you so much! 239 00:12:00,136 --> 00:12:02,263 Now, I have learned that most of the orchestra 240 00:12:02,346 --> 00:12:04,140 is having their appendixes removed. 241 00:12:04,223 --> 00:12:07,435 So, without further ado, I give you the remnants 242 00:12:07,518 --> 00:12:09,979 of the Springfield Elementary School orchestra. 243 00:12:10,062 --> 00:12:12,314 On saxophone, Lisa Simpson. 244 00:12:12,398 --> 00:12:14,692 On triangle, Martin Prince, 245 00:12:14,775 --> 00:12:16,527 and with a flute up his nose, 246 00:12:16,610 --> 00:12:17,610 Ralph Wiggum. 247 00:12:17,653 --> 00:12:18,821 ♪♪ 248 00:12:18,904 --> 00:12:20,406 That's some nice flutin', boy. 249 00:12:20,489 --> 00:12:22,742 They will be playing "Stars And Stripes Forever," 250 00:12:22,825 --> 00:12:24,076 hopefully not forever. 251 00:12:24,869 --> 00:12:27,830 ♪♪ 252 00:12:30,082 --> 00:12:31,000 This sucks! 253 00:12:31,083 --> 00:12:34,003 ♪♪ 254 00:12:43,929 --> 00:12:46,640 Hey, Bleeding Gums, I was great! 255 00:12:46,724 --> 00:12:48,309 And I owe it all to... 256 00:12:48,392 --> 00:12:49,894 What happened to Mr. Murphy? 257 00:12:49,977 --> 00:12:51,896 I'm sorry. He passed away. 258 00:13:05,326 --> 00:13:07,703 Lisa, honey, are you gonna be okay? 259 00:13:07,787 --> 00:13:09,497 Bleeding Gums was my hero, 260 00:13:09,580 --> 00:13:11,999 and I never got to tell him how I felt. 261 00:13:12,082 --> 00:13:13,876 I'm sure he knew. 262 00:13:13,959 --> 00:13:16,504 And I'm sure that wherever he is now, he's happy. 263 00:13:16,587 --> 00:13:17,797 But he was the only person 264 00:13:17,880 --> 00:13:20,841 who had the same love for music that I do. 265 00:13:22,718 --> 00:13:24,470 Thank you. 266 00:13:24,553 --> 00:13:27,139 Dad, why did he have to die? 267 00:13:27,223 --> 00:13:30,267 Well, it's like the time that your cat Snowball 268 00:13:30,351 --> 00:13:31,894 got run over. 269 00:13:31,977 --> 00:13:33,270 - Remember, honey? - Yeah. 270 00:13:33,354 --> 00:13:34,855 What I'm saying is 271 00:13:34,939 --> 00:13:37,483 all we have to do is go down to the pound 272 00:13:37,566 --> 00:13:38,859 and get a new jazzman. 273 00:13:38,943 --> 00:13:41,362 Dad! 274 00:13:44,323 --> 00:13:46,826 I blew it again. 275 00:13:46,909 --> 00:13:47,909 What? 276 00:13:50,871 --> 00:13:53,499 Hey, Lis, you still upset about that jazz guy? 277 00:13:53,582 --> 00:13:57,044 If it helps, I believe that after you die, 278 00:13:57,127 --> 00:13:59,171 you can come back as whatever you want. 279 00:13:59,255 --> 00:14:00,631 I'll be a butterfly. 280 00:14:00,714 --> 00:14:02,049 How come? 281 00:14:02,132 --> 00:14:06,303 Because... nobody ever suspects "the butterfly." 282 00:14:09,139 --> 00:14:10,683 I didn't burn down the school. 283 00:14:10,766 --> 00:14:12,518 It was the butterfly, I tell you. 284 00:14:12,601 --> 00:14:13,936 The butterfly! 285 00:14:14,019 --> 00:14:16,272 He's crazy, boys. Get the Taser. 286 00:14:23,028 --> 00:14:24,405 Maybe I need to talk to somebody 287 00:14:24,488 --> 00:14:26,740 with a little more age and wisdom. 288 00:14:26,824 --> 00:14:29,743 Death stalks you at every turn! 289 00:14:29,827 --> 00:14:31,787 - Grampa. - Well, it does. 290 00:14:33,497 --> 00:14:35,541 There it is! Death! 291 00:14:35,624 --> 00:14:36,876 It's only Maggie. 292 00:14:36,959 --> 00:14:39,169 Yeah. 293 00:14:39,253 --> 00:14:40,713 You know, at my age, 294 00:14:40,796 --> 00:14:42,756 the mind starts playing tricks, so... 295 00:14:42,840 --> 00:14:44,800 Death! 296 00:14:44,884 --> 00:14:46,427 That's only the cat. 297 00:14:47,761 --> 00:14:49,430 Death! 298 00:14:49,513 --> 00:14:50,931 That's Maggie again, Grampa. 299 00:14:51,015 --> 00:14:52,474 Where were we? 300 00:14:52,558 --> 00:14:53,809 Death! 301 00:14:55,394 --> 00:14:58,188 How come it won't stop hurting? 302 00:14:58,272 --> 00:15:00,190 Lisa, it's normal 303 00:15:00,274 --> 00:15:01,859 to be sad when a friend dies. 304 00:15:01,942 --> 00:15:04,153 And Bleeding Gums was a good friend to you. 305 00:15:04,236 --> 00:15:07,156 But nobody is really gone, as long as we remember them. 306 00:15:07,239 --> 00:15:10,284 Lisa, honey, if you really want to preserve his memory, 307 00:15:10,367 --> 00:15:12,119 I recommend getting a tattoo. 308 00:15:12,202 --> 00:15:14,580 It preserves the things you love. 309 00:15:14,663 --> 00:15:17,041 "Starland Vocal Band?!" 310 00:15:17,124 --> 00:15:18,208 They suck! 311 00:15:18,292 --> 00:15:20,210 Death! 312 00:15:27,968 --> 00:15:29,637 Isn't anybody gonna show up? 313 00:15:29,720 --> 00:15:31,388 Well, Lisa, we've waited an hour. 314 00:15:33,515 --> 00:15:37,227 "Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today 315 00:15:37,311 --> 00:15:40,314 to bid farewell to Blood and Guts Murphy." 316 00:15:40,397 --> 00:15:42,608 No! It was Bleeding Gums Murphy. 317 00:15:42,691 --> 00:15:45,194 Anyway, "Bloody Gums Murphy 318 00:15:45,277 --> 00:15:46,862 was quite the sousaphone player..." 319 00:15:46,946 --> 00:15:47,946 Saxophone! 320 00:15:47,988 --> 00:15:50,032 He was a jazz musician. 321 00:15:50,115 --> 00:15:51,200 You didn't know him! 322 00:15:51,283 --> 00:15:52,368 Nobody knew him! 323 00:15:52,451 --> 00:15:53,994 But he was a great man. 324 00:15:54,078 --> 00:15:55,579 And I won't rest 325 00:15:55,663 --> 00:15:57,039 until all of Springfield 326 00:15:57,122 --> 00:15:59,959 knows the name Bleeding Gums Murphy! 327 00:16:00,042 --> 00:16:02,878 And I won't rest until I've gotten a hot dog. 328 00:16:02,962 --> 00:16:04,546 Homer, this is a cemetery. 329 00:16:04,630 --> 00:16:06,674 Hot dogs! Get your hot dogs here! 330 00:16:06,757 --> 00:16:08,133 Whoo-hoo! 331 00:16:08,217 --> 00:16:10,970 What do you do? Follow my husband around? 332 00:16:11,053 --> 00:16:13,847 Lady, he's putting my kids through college. 333 00:16:18,310 --> 00:16:20,270 Good news, Bart. 334 00:16:20,354 --> 00:16:24,775 The Krusty-O Cereal Corp. Has settled your case for $100,000, 335 00:16:24,858 --> 00:16:26,193 less, of course, my legal fees. 336 00:16:26,276 --> 00:16:27,903 What kind of legal fees? 337 00:16:27,987 --> 00:16:29,905 Well, for a case this complex, 338 00:16:29,989 --> 00:16:32,992 I had to assemble a crack team of lawyers: 339 00:16:33,075 --> 00:16:34,910 Ronald Shaporo, trial attorney. 340 00:16:34,994 --> 00:16:36,453 Albert Dershman, who can hold 341 00:16:36,537 --> 00:16:38,330 three billiard balls in his mouth. 342 00:16:38,414 --> 00:16:40,040 How much of the hundred thou' do I get? 343 00:16:42,209 --> 00:16:44,253 Five hundred dollars? 344 00:16:44,336 --> 00:16:46,380 - Yes, well... - Cool! 345 00:16:46,463 --> 00:16:48,424 Glad you're happy. Let's roll. 346 00:16:51,635 --> 00:16:54,847 I can't believe it. 500 bucks. 347 00:16:54,930 --> 00:16:57,182 Just think what I can do with that money. 348 00:16:59,810 --> 00:17:01,353 $500 on red. 349 00:17:03,856 --> 00:17:05,190 The winner is black. 350 00:17:06,734 --> 00:17:08,318 Cool. 351 00:17:08,402 --> 00:17:10,654 Mom, I want to honor Bleeding Gums' memory, 352 00:17:10,738 --> 00:17:12,239 but I don't know where to start. 353 00:17:12,322 --> 00:17:14,616 Maybe you could get the local jazz station 354 00:17:14,700 --> 00:17:16,535 to do a tribute to him? 355 00:17:16,618 --> 00:17:19,329 Jazz. They just make it up as they go along. 356 00:17:19,413 --> 00:17:20,748 I could do that. 357 00:17:23,375 --> 00:17:24,960 That's "Mary Had A Little Lamb." 358 00:17:25,044 --> 00:17:26,295 Okay, then this. 359 00:17:29,048 --> 00:17:30,608 That's the same thing. You just replaced 360 00:17:30,674 --> 00:17:32,134 - "dees" with "doos." - D' 361 00:17:32,217 --> 00:17:34,803 Hi. I have a request. 362 00:17:34,887 --> 00:17:35,947 I would like you to do a tribute 363 00:17:35,971 --> 00:17:37,251 to Bleeding Gums Murphy, please. 364 00:17:37,306 --> 00:17:38,515 I'd love to, little sister, 365 00:17:38,599 --> 00:17:39,933 but we don't have his album. 366 00:17:40,017 --> 00:17:41,268 What if I could find it? 367 00:17:41,351 --> 00:17:42,853 Well, I'd spin it for you, 368 00:17:42,936 --> 00:17:44,247 but, you know, ain't no one gonna hear it. 369 00:17:44,271 --> 00:17:46,273 Our broadcast range is only 23 feet, 370 00:17:46,356 --> 00:17:48,484 which makes us the most powerful jazz station 371 00:17:48,567 --> 00:17:49,902 in the entire U.S. of A. 372 00:17:49,985 --> 00:17:51,987 Gee, your station has a lot of problems. 373 00:17:52,071 --> 00:17:53,071 Tell me about it. 374 00:17:53,113 --> 00:17:54,823 Just look at our morning guy. 375 00:17:54,907 --> 00:17:57,868 Hello. This is Mole Man in the morning. 376 00:17:57,951 --> 00:17:59,995 Good mole man to you. 377 00:18:00,079 --> 00:18:02,247 Today: Part four of our series 378 00:18:02,331 --> 00:18:06,543 of "The agonizing pain in which I live every day." 379 00:18:09,088 --> 00:18:11,465 $250?! 380 00:18:11,548 --> 00:18:13,175 But I need that album 381 00:18:13,258 --> 00:18:15,052 to honor the memory of Bleeding Gums Murphy. 382 00:18:15,135 --> 00:18:17,554 He's dead? Well, why didn't you say so? 383 00:18:23,519 --> 00:18:26,021 Where am I gonna get $500? 384 00:18:35,656 --> 00:18:37,866 Now drive, Smithers, drive! 385 00:18:44,373 --> 00:18:46,917 Excuse me, my good man, I have $500 to blow. 386 00:18:47,000 --> 00:18:48,001 What have you got? 387 00:18:48,085 --> 00:18:50,295 Behold! The ultimate pog. 388 00:18:52,422 --> 00:18:53,422 I'll take it! 389 00:19:07,020 --> 00:19:08,856 Lisa, look what I've got. 390 00:19:08,939 --> 00:19:10,691 Ta-da! 391 00:19:12,151 --> 00:19:14,611 Bart, I can't believe it, but why? 392 00:19:14,695 --> 00:19:16,029 When I said my stomach hurt, 393 00:19:16,113 --> 00:19:17,990 you were the only one who believed me. 394 00:19:18,073 --> 00:19:21,702 Thank you, but $500? 395 00:19:21,785 --> 00:19:23,996 You'll never see that much money again. 396 00:19:24,079 --> 00:19:26,165 Yeah? Take a look at this. 397 00:19:30,002 --> 00:19:31,420 I got the album. 398 00:19:33,797 --> 00:19:35,549 Here. You can listen to it on this. 399 00:19:39,595 --> 00:19:41,513 I did the best I could, Bleeding Gums. 400 00:19:48,520 --> 00:19:50,189 ♪♪ 401 00:19:56,778 --> 00:19:59,656 ♪♪ 402 00:20:05,162 --> 00:20:06,538 Attention, all units. 403 00:20:06,622 --> 00:20:08,540 Attention, all units. 404 00:20:08,624 --> 00:20:10,042 Poison gas cloud heading for... 405 00:20:11,126 --> 00:20:13,462 ♪♪ 406 00:20:13,545 --> 00:20:15,047 That's nice. 407 00:20:15,130 --> 00:20:16,715 Hey, it's getting cloudy. 408 00:20:18,592 --> 00:20:20,469 Boy. 409 00:20:23,180 --> 00:20:26,058 ♪♪ 410 00:20:31,271 --> 00:20:33,899 That was for you, Bleeding Gums. 411 00:20:36,068 --> 00:20:39,738 You've made an old jazzman happy, Lisa. 412 00:20:39,821 --> 00:20:41,740 You must avenge my death, Kimba... 413 00:20:41,823 --> 00:20:43,951 I mean Simba. 414 00:20:44,034 --> 00:20:46,578 Luke, I am your father. 415 00:20:46,662 --> 00:20:48,330 This is CNN. 416 00:20:48,413 --> 00:20:49,957 Will you guys pipe down? 417 00:20:50,040 --> 00:20:52,125 I'm saying good-bye to Lisa. 418 00:20:52,209 --> 00:20:54,169 We're sorry. 419 00:20:54,253 --> 00:20:56,213 I don't want you to go. 420 00:20:56,296 --> 00:20:59,132 Sorry, but I have to. Good-bye. 421 00:20:59,216 --> 00:21:01,093 Good-bye. 422 00:21:06,431 --> 00:21:08,058 What the heck? 423 00:21:08,141 --> 00:21:09,309 Once more from the top. 424 00:21:09,393 --> 00:21:10,811 Yay! 425 00:21:10,894 --> 00:21:13,522 ♪♪ 426 00:21:17,651 --> 00:21:21,488 ♪ When the jazzman's testifying ♪ 427 00:21:21,571 --> 00:21:25,659 ♪ A faithless man believes ♪ 428 00:21:25,742 --> 00:21:29,705 ♪ He can sing you into paradise ♪ 429 00:21:29,788 --> 00:21:34,584 ♪ Or bring you to your knees ♪ 430 00:21:34,668 --> 00:21:38,588 ♪ Jazzman ♪ 431 00:21:38,672 --> 00:21:41,800 ♪ Take my blues away ♪ 432 00:21:41,883 --> 00:21:46,471 ♪ Make my pain the same as yours ♪ 433 00:21:46,555 --> 00:21:50,684 ♪ With every change you play ♪ 434 00:21:50,767 --> 00:21:54,604 ♪ Jazzman ♪ 435 00:21:54,688 --> 00:21:58,692 ♪ Jazzman ♪ 436 00:21:58,775 --> 00:22:01,653 ♪♪ 437 00:22:18,503 --> 00:22:20,505 One more time! 438 00:22:20,589 --> 00:22:22,007 Come on, Lisa. 439 00:22:22,090 --> 00:22:24,843 I got a date with Billie Holiday. 440 00:22:26,386 --> 00:22:27,804 Shh. 441 00:22:29,931 --> 00:22:32,809 CAPTIONS ENHANCED BY ROUNDABOUT ENTERTAINMENT INC. 29966

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