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♪ The Simpsons ♪
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D'
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Hello. I'm Kent Brockman,
and this is Eye on Springfield.
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♪♪
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Tonight, we'll visit
Springfield's answer
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to the Benedictine monks...
the Rapping Rabbis.
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♪ Don't eat pork ♪
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♪ Not even vit' a fork ♪
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♪ Can't touch this! ♪
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Marge, are we Jewish?
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- No, Homer.
- Whoo-hoo!
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- But first, we all stink.
- We all... hey!
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That's according
to a national survey
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ranking Springfield as the
least popular city in America.
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In science, dead last.
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I'm telling you people
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the Earth revolves
around the sun.
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Burn him!
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What a story!
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You've stolen my soul!
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In culture, dead last.
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Eleanor, we've got
to do something
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about this depression,
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so I propo...
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That's right, I'm crippled.
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This is terrible.
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People will start
to avoid Springfield.
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00:02:01,079 --> 00:02:02,413
But what can I do?
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I'm just... one... one man.
30
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I think we should call
a town meeting.
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If we don't do something soon,
we won't get any tourists at all.
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No tourists?
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I'll be ruined.
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Maps to movie stars' homes!
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Mapas por las casas
de la cineastas.
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Top-u stah noh cheezu map-u.
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Excuse me.
Are you Drew Barrymore?
38
00:02:26,813 --> 00:02:29,983
What? Get out of here.
I'm hung over.
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- Sorry, Miss Barrymore.
- What?
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Are there
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any suggestions for how
to attract more tourism?
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The easiest way to be popular
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is to leech off
the popularity of others.
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So we propose changing
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our name from "Springfield"
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to "Seinfeld."
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♪♪
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I may be just a boy,
but I have an idea.
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If I may, I'd like
to show you a few slides.
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Here's Springfield
as it appears from space.
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Somewhere in this windy valley
is the Lost Dutchman's Mine.
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Young man, that appears
to be a picture
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of your rear end.
54
00:03:04,559 --> 00:03:05,977
So long, suckers!
55
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Whoa!
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Aw! This is the last time
57
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I use an escape plan
devised by Milhouse.
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Sorry, Bart.
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00:03:14,444 --> 00:03:17,405
I'm Marge Simpson,
and I have an idea.
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Marge is going to say something.
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00:03:21,034 --> 00:03:24,412
Now I know you haven't liked
some of my past suggestions
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like switching
to the metric system...
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The metric system
is the tool of the devil!
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00:03:30,210 --> 00:03:33,171
My car gets 40 rods
to the hogshead,
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and that's the way I likes it.
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The old person's remarks will be
stricken from the record.
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Who said that?
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But my new idea is different.
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I think we should hold
a film festival
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and give out prizes.
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Could we make our own movies
and enter them?
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- Yes.
- At last, an excuse to wear makeup!
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All in favor of Marge Simpson's
film festival idea...
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Film festival!
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Film festival!
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You like my idea?
77
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Actually,
I have several others...
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00:04:01,324 --> 00:04:03,076
Don't push your luck!
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Don't push your luck!
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00:04:06,412 --> 00:04:08,081
And... action!
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Hello. I'm Bart Simpson.
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In the past, I've brought you
such classic films
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as Homer in the Shower
and Homer on the Toilet.
84
00:04:15,713 --> 00:04:19,008
And now I give you
The Eternal Struggle.
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00:04:20,551 --> 00:04:22,804
"Relaxed fit," my Aunt Fanny.
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Stupid Dockers.
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The belt is buckled.
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Now Maude, in our movie,
you lay baby Moses in the basket
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then put it among the reeds.
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Okay? Lights! Camera!
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00:04:38,236 --> 00:04:40,822
A-diddily-doddily-
doodilly-action, Jackson!
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00:04:45,159 --> 00:04:51,833
Help me-e-e-e-e-e!
93
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Flanders to God,
Flanders to God.
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00:04:54,502 --> 00:04:56,754
Get off your cloud
and save my Todd!
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Yay!
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00:05:04,721 --> 00:05:06,139
Thanks, God.
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Okely-dokely.
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00:05:07,473 --> 00:05:09,392
What are you doing, Ma?
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I'm looking for a film critic
to help judge our festival.
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Did you know there are over
600 critics on TV,
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00:05:14,731 --> 00:05:16,733
and Leonard Maltin's
the best-looking of them all?
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Ew!
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00:05:17,900 --> 00:05:19,652
Welcome to Coming Attractions.
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00:05:19,736 --> 00:05:21,571
I'm your host, Jay Sherman.
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00:05:21,654 --> 00:05:22,655
Thank you.
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00:05:22,739 --> 00:05:24,532
Tonight, we review
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an aging Charles Bronson
in Death Wish Nine.
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I wish I was dead. Oy!
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00:05:30,747 --> 00:05:32,498
But first,
we have a special guest.
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00:05:32,582 --> 00:05:34,167
Rainer Wolfcastle...
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Star of the reprehensible
McBain movies.
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Jay, my new film
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is a mix of action und comedy.
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It's called
McBain: Let's Get Silly.
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Did you ever notice
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how men always leave
the toilet seat up?
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That's the joke.
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You suck, McBain!
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And now,
my Woody Allen impression.
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00:05:58,816 --> 00:06:00,610
"I'm a neurotic nerd
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who likes to sleep
with little girls."
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00:06:02,695 --> 00:06:04,947
Hey, that really sucked!
123
00:06:08,534 --> 00:06:11,162
The film is just me
in front of a brick wall
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00:06:11,245 --> 00:06:12,789
for an hour and a half.
125
00:06:12,872 --> 00:06:15,375
It cost $80 million.
126
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How do you sleep at night?
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On top of a pile of money
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with many beautiful ladies.
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00:06:20,922 --> 00:06:23,299
Just asking. Eesh!
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00:06:23,383 --> 00:06:26,344
I like him.
He's smart, he's sensitive,
131
00:06:26,427 --> 00:06:28,530
he's clearly not obsessed
with his physical appearance.
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My ears are burning.
133
00:06:30,515 --> 00:06:32,934
I wasn't talking about you, Dad.
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00:06:33,017 --> 00:06:34,352
Well, my ears
are really burning.
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00:06:34,435 --> 00:06:36,813
I wanted to see inside,
so I lit a Q-tip.
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00:06:38,606 --> 00:06:39,941
Dear Mr. Sherman,
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00:06:40,024 --> 00:06:41,859
on behalf of the people
of Springfield,
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00:06:41,943 --> 00:06:44,362
I would like to invite you
to judge our film festival.
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00:06:44,445 --> 00:06:46,406
You can stay with us
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00:06:46,489 --> 00:06:48,991
and enjoy the sights and sounds
of the country.
141
00:06:49,075 --> 00:06:50,785
Marge, is this
a pimple or a boil?
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00:06:50,868 --> 00:06:52,495
Just a minute, Homer.
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00:06:52,578 --> 00:06:55,039
Look what you made me write.
144
00:06:55,123 --> 00:06:57,351
Anyway, we think you'll really
enjoy our quiet little town.
145
00:06:57,375 --> 00:06:59,085
Sincerely, Marge Simpson.
146
00:06:59,168 --> 00:07:02,630
Do I really
want to leave Manhattan?
147
00:07:02,713 --> 00:07:05,925
Sherman, I just realized,
you insulted me.
148
00:07:06,008 --> 00:07:07,468
Now you will die.
149
00:07:07,552 --> 00:07:10,430
Hey, Nudnick,
your shoe's untied.
150
00:07:10,513 --> 00:07:12,515
From here,
they appear to be tied,
151
00:07:12,598 --> 00:07:14,684
but I will go in
for a closer look.
152
00:07:15,810 --> 00:07:17,103
Taxi!
153
00:07:17,186 --> 00:07:18,563
To the airport!
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00:07:21,774 --> 00:07:25,027
On closer inspection,
these are loafers.
155
00:07:31,117 --> 00:07:33,369
Attention. The flight
from New York has arrived.
156
00:07:33,453 --> 00:07:34,787
Hey, I'm landing here!
157
00:07:38,666 --> 00:07:41,502
It's supposed to say
Jay's name, not yours.
158
00:07:41,586 --> 00:07:43,254
You're right.
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00:07:46,382 --> 00:07:47,925
There you... D'
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Just a second.
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- That's it... D'
-Hello.
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00:07:53,097 --> 00:07:55,600
I'm Marge Simpson,
and this is my husband, Homer.
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00:07:55,683 --> 00:07:57,185
Nice to meet you, Marge.
164
00:07:57,268 --> 00:07:59,061
I saw your hair from the plane.
165
00:07:59,145 --> 00:08:01,481
And you must be
the man who didn't know
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00:08:01,564 --> 00:08:03,316
if he had a pimple or a boil.
167
00:08:03,399 --> 00:08:05,776
It was a Gummi Bear.
168
00:08:05,860 --> 00:08:08,988
Coming up next... The Flintstones
Meet The Jetsons.
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00:08:09,071 --> 00:08:12,450
I smell another
cheap cartoon crossover.
170
00:08:12,533 --> 00:08:15,161
Bart Simpson, meet
Jay Sherman, the critic.
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00:08:15,244 --> 00:08:16,287
Hello.
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00:08:16,370 --> 00:08:17,747
Hey, man,
I really love your show.
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00:08:17,830 --> 00:08:19,790
I think all kids
should watch it.
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00:08:19,874 --> 00:08:22,460
Ew... I suddenly feel so dirty.
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00:08:27,924 --> 00:08:29,717
I don't know what's happening.
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00:08:29,800 --> 00:08:32,220
It seems our profits
have dropped 37%.
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00:08:32,303 --> 00:08:34,263
I'm afraid we have
a bad image, sir.
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00:08:34,347 --> 00:08:36,742
Market research shows people
see you as something of an ogre.
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00:08:36,766 --> 00:08:39,352
I ought to club them
and eat their bones.
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00:08:39,435 --> 00:08:41,896
Heh-heh. Well, maybe this
film festival could help us.
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00:08:41,979 --> 00:08:44,607
A film biography might let them
get to know the real you...
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00:08:44,690 --> 00:08:47,610
Virtuous, heroic, nubile...
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00:08:47,693 --> 00:08:49,570
You left out pleasant!
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00:08:49,654 --> 00:08:51,948
But I like
that film biography idea...
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00:08:52,031 --> 00:08:54,450
A slick Hollywood picture
to gloss over
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00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:58,037
my evil rise to power
like Bugsy or Working Girl.
187
00:08:58,120 --> 00:09:01,123
- Get me Steven Spielberg.
- He's unavailable.
188
00:09:01,207 --> 00:09:04,418
Then get me his non-union
Mexican equivalent.
189
00:09:04,502 --> 00:09:07,463
Listen Señor Spielbergo,
I want you to do for me
190
00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:09,549
what Spielberg did
for Oskar Schindler.
191
00:09:09,632 --> 00:09:10,883
Schindler es bueno.
192
00:09:10,967 --> 00:09:13,135
Señor Burns es el diablo.
193
00:09:13,219 --> 00:09:16,430
Listen Spielbergo, Schindler
and I are like peas in a pod.
194
00:09:16,514 --> 00:09:18,015
We're both factory owners.
195
00:09:18,099 --> 00:09:20,017
We both made shells
for the Nazis,
196
00:09:20,101 --> 00:09:21,852
but mine worked, damn it.
197
00:09:21,936 --> 00:09:23,980
Now go out there
and win me that festival.
198
00:09:27,525 --> 00:09:30,152
Homer, the guest should get
the last pork chop.
199
00:09:30,236 --> 00:09:32,488
But I'm still hungry.
200
00:09:42,999 --> 00:09:44,375
Mr. Sherman,
201
00:09:44,458 --> 00:09:46,669
I understand you have
two Pulitzer Prizes.
202
00:09:46,752 --> 00:09:49,964
Well, it's not like
I carry them around with me.
203
00:09:50,047 --> 00:09:52,633
Ooh, it's so hot in here.
204
00:09:52,717 --> 00:09:55,344
Look, here's
my People's Choice award.
205
00:09:55,428 --> 00:09:57,096
Five Golden Globes.
206
00:10:00,099 --> 00:10:01,684
Where's my Emmy?
207
00:10:03,352 --> 00:10:04,562
Thank you.
208
00:10:04,645 --> 00:10:06,022
Yeah, well, I won
209
00:10:06,105 --> 00:10:08,065
the belching contest at work.
210
00:10:11,736 --> 00:10:13,613
Very nice, Homer.
211
00:10:22,663 --> 00:10:24,290
Wow, how many
Pulitzer Prize winners
212
00:10:24,373 --> 00:10:25,625
can do that?
213
00:10:25,708 --> 00:10:27,668
Just me and Eudora Welty.
214
00:10:29,170 --> 00:10:30,463
I invited my sisters over.
215
00:10:30,546 --> 00:10:31,714
Ooh, sisters.
216
00:10:31,797 --> 00:10:33,215
Allow me.
217
00:10:37,511 --> 00:10:39,680
So then I said to Woody Allen,
218
00:10:39,764 --> 00:10:44,310
"Well, Camus can do,
but Sartre is smartre."
219
00:10:44,393 --> 00:10:45,478
So original.
220
00:10:45,561 --> 00:10:47,438
How droll.
221
00:10:47,521 --> 00:10:51,400
Yeah, well,
"Scooby-doo can doo-doo,
222
00:10:51,484 --> 00:10:54,654
but Jimmy Carter is smarter."
223
00:10:59,533 --> 00:11:02,119
Okay, Sherman,
you're a movie expert.
224
00:11:02,203 --> 00:11:03,871
So tell us, who's gay?
225
00:11:03,954 --> 00:11:05,081
I don't know.
226
00:11:05,164 --> 00:11:06,374
Harvey Fierstein.
227
00:11:06,457 --> 00:11:08,376
- No!
- Who else?
228
00:11:10,753 --> 00:11:12,505
MacGyver's gay.
229
00:11:18,260 --> 00:11:21,347
You badmouthed MacGyver,
didn't you?
230
00:11:24,517 --> 00:11:26,811
What you doing, Marge?
231
00:11:26,894 --> 00:11:28,979
Making out the jury list
for the film festival.
232
00:11:29,063 --> 00:11:31,357
Mayor Quimby, Krusty, Jay...
233
00:11:32,942 --> 00:11:35,236
Marge, do you respect
my intelligence?
234
00:11:37,780 --> 00:11:38,781
Yes.
235
00:11:38,864 --> 00:11:41,909
Okay. Wait a minute.
236
00:11:41,992 --> 00:11:43,744
Why did it take you
so long to say yes?
237
00:11:46,038 --> 00:11:47,498
No reason.
238
00:11:47,581 --> 00:11:48,916
Okay.
239
00:11:48,999 --> 00:11:50,459
Wait a minute.
240
00:11:50,543 --> 00:11:52,002
Are you humoring me?
241
00:11:54,547 --> 00:11:55,631
Yes.
242
00:11:55,715 --> 00:11:56,924
Okay.
243
00:11:57,007 --> 00:11:58,759
Wait a minute.
That's bad.
244
00:11:58,843 --> 00:12:01,846
Look, I know I'm not witty
like that critic guy,
245
00:12:01,929 --> 00:12:05,599
but does he know all the words
to the Oscar Mayer song?
246
00:12:05,683 --> 00:12:09,603
♪ I wish I were
an Oscar Mayer wiener ♪
247
00:12:09,687 --> 00:12:13,441
♪ That is what
I'd truly like to be ♪
248
00:12:13,524 --> 00:12:17,278
♪ 'Cause if I were
an Oscar Mayer wiener ♪
249
00:12:17,361 --> 00:12:22,616
♪ Everyone would be
in love with me... ♪
250
00:12:28,122 --> 00:12:29,498
That's it, Marge.
251
00:12:29,582 --> 00:12:31,625
He knows the whole hot dog song.
252
00:12:31,709 --> 00:12:33,669
Go ahead. Sleep with him.
253
00:12:33,753 --> 00:12:35,921
I'll just take
a lock of your hair
254
00:12:36,005 --> 00:12:38,007
to remember you by.
255
00:12:38,090 --> 00:12:40,134
It's just you and me now,
lock of hair.
256
00:12:40,217 --> 00:12:41,927
You don't have to do this.
257
00:12:42,011 --> 00:12:43,554
Yeah? Well you think
I'm stupid.
258
00:12:43,637 --> 00:12:45,681
I don't think you're stupid.
259
00:12:45,765 --> 00:12:47,659
Prove it... put me on that
film jury festival thing.
260
00:12:47,683 --> 00:12:49,810
Fine, you're on the jury.
261
00:12:56,400 --> 00:12:58,194
Sir, the actors are here
to audition
262
00:12:58,277 --> 00:12:59,737
for the part of you.
263
00:12:59,820 --> 00:13:00,821
Excellent.
264
00:13:03,783 --> 00:13:05,367
Excellent.
265
00:13:06,702 --> 00:13:08,621
- Next.
- Exc-ell-ent.
266
00:13:08,704 --> 00:13:13,167
- Next.
- Exactly... D'
267
00:13:13,250 --> 00:13:15,669
- Next.
- Excellente.
268
00:13:15,753 --> 00:13:17,004
Es muy bueno.
269
00:13:17,087 --> 00:13:18,130
It's hopeless.
270
00:13:18,214 --> 00:13:19,924
I'll have to play myself.
271
00:13:23,010 --> 00:13:24,762
I thought they were playing
272
00:13:24,845 --> 00:13:26,764
the Rocky Horror Picture Show
tonight.
273
00:13:28,265 --> 00:13:30,851
Our first film
is by Indian director
274
00:13:30,935 --> 00:13:32,394
Apu Nahassapemapetilan.
275
00:13:32,478 --> 00:13:35,105
Bright Lights, Beef Jerky.
276
00:13:35,189 --> 00:13:37,650
Help! Help! Police!
277
00:13:37,733 --> 00:13:39,693
I got problems
of my own right now.
278
00:13:39,777 --> 00:13:42,488
Boy. This is going to get worse
before it gets better.
279
00:13:45,199 --> 00:13:49,203
Next, we have Moe the Bartender
in Moe Better Booze.
280
00:13:49,286 --> 00:13:51,455
♪ Money gets you ♪
281
00:13:51,539 --> 00:13:53,374
♪ One more round,
drink it down ♪
282
00:13:53,457 --> 00:13:54,625
♪ You stupid clown ♪
283
00:13:54,708 --> 00:13:56,669
♪ Money gets you
one more round ♪
284
00:13:56,752 --> 00:13:58,963
♪ Then you're out on your ass ♪
285
00:13:59,046 --> 00:14:00,214
Whoa!
286
00:14:00,297 --> 00:14:01,674
My back!
287
00:14:11,767 --> 00:14:13,060
Ooh!
288
00:14:16,313 --> 00:14:18,357
This contest is over.
289
00:14:18,440 --> 00:14:21,235
Give that man the $10,000.
290
00:14:21,318 --> 00:14:24,154
This isn't
America's Funniest Home Videos.
291
00:14:24,238 --> 00:14:26,824
But the ball... his groin.
292
00:14:26,907 --> 00:14:31,412
It works on so many levels.
293
00:14:31,495 --> 00:14:33,038
Roll it again.
294
00:14:33,122 --> 00:14:35,249
Next, they're going
to show my movie.
295
00:14:35,332 --> 00:14:36,959
You made a movie?
296
00:14:37,042 --> 00:14:38,961
I made a movie?
297
00:14:39,044 --> 00:14:41,422
No wonder I was on the cover
of Entertainment Weekly.
298
00:14:41,505 --> 00:14:43,382
♪♪
299
00:14:47,553 --> 00:14:49,763
My name is Barney Gumble.
300
00:14:49,847 --> 00:14:51,265
I'm 40...
301
00:14:51,348 --> 00:14:52,348
I am single...
302
00:14:52,391 --> 00:14:53,391
and I drink.
303
00:15:01,317 --> 00:15:03,986
There's a line in Othello
about a drinker.
304
00:15:04,069 --> 00:15:06,488
"Now a sensible man
305
00:15:06,572 --> 00:15:07,990
"by and by a fool
306
00:15:08,073 --> 00:15:09,366
and presently a beast!"
307
00:15:09,450 --> 00:15:11,368
That pretty well covers it.
308
00:15:16,332 --> 00:15:17,583
It's brilliant.
309
00:15:17,666 --> 00:15:19,293
Savagely honest, tender...
310
00:15:19,376 --> 00:15:21,086
he has the soul of a poet.
311
00:15:21,170 --> 00:15:22,671
You're very kind.
312
00:15:22,755 --> 00:15:25,382
Excuse me. Did something
crawl down your throat and die?
313
00:15:25,466 --> 00:15:26,884
It didn't die.
314
00:15:26,967 --> 00:15:29,595
My name is Barney,
and I'm an alcoholic.
315
00:15:29,678 --> 00:15:32,139
Mr. Gumble,
this is a Girl Scout meeting.
316
00:15:32,222 --> 00:15:36,268
Is it, or is it that you girls
can't admit you have a problem?
317
00:15:41,398 --> 00:15:43,651
Don't cry for me.
318
00:15:43,734 --> 00:15:45,611
I'm already dead.
319
00:15:58,916 --> 00:16:00,125
I think we have a winner.
320
00:16:00,209 --> 00:16:01,293
What'd I miss?
321
00:16:01,377 --> 00:16:03,045
Homer! Please pay
attention.
322
00:16:03,128 --> 00:16:04,672
There's just one more movie.
323
00:16:17,017 --> 00:16:19,186
Simple villagers, I promise you.
324
00:16:19,269 --> 00:16:22,523
I will close plants in America
and bring work here.
325
00:16:22,606 --> 00:16:24,108
Viva, Señor Burns.
326
00:16:24,191 --> 00:16:26,527
All:
Viva! Viva!
327
00:16:26,610 --> 00:16:29,655
Whoa!!
328
00:16:32,074 --> 00:16:35,536
We did 20 takes,
and that was the best one.
329
00:16:35,619 --> 00:16:37,162
Remember, Elliott.
330
00:16:37,246 --> 00:16:38,914
I'll be right here.
331
00:16:50,384 --> 00:16:52,928
- Pure egotism.
- Self-indulgent tripe.
332
00:16:53,012 --> 00:16:54,388
I don't care what they say.
333
00:16:54,471 --> 00:16:56,515
I'm going to win this festival.
334
00:17:07,568 --> 00:17:09,695
Drink up, Judah Ben-hur.
335
00:17:12,156 --> 00:17:15,701
You truly are the king of kings.
336
00:17:17,161 --> 00:17:18,412
Excellent.
337
00:17:20,247 --> 00:17:22,124
All:
Boo!!
338
00:17:22,207 --> 00:17:24,293
Smithers, are they booing me?
339
00:17:24,376 --> 00:17:28,839
No, they're saying,
"buu-urns, buu-urns."
340
00:17:28,922 --> 00:17:31,508
Are you saying
"boo" or "buu-urns?"
341
00:17:31,592 --> 00:17:33,802
all:
Boo!!
342
00:17:33,886 --> 00:17:36,346
I was saying, "buu-urns."
343
00:17:42,061 --> 00:17:44,521
Alright it's time
to vote for the grand prize.
344
00:17:44,605 --> 00:17:46,440
I vote for Barney Gumble's
345
00:17:46,523 --> 00:17:50,277
sensitive, yet unfortunately
titled film Puke-a-hantas.
346
00:17:50,360 --> 00:17:52,821
- Second.
- Well I vote for Burns's movie.
347
00:17:52,905 --> 00:17:54,823
Me, too.
Now let's get going.
348
00:17:54,907 --> 00:17:56,784
I got a date with Eudora Welty.
349
00:17:58,243 --> 00:17:59,828
Coming, Eudora.
350
00:18:02,289 --> 00:18:03,999
Excellent.
351
00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:06,960
Bribing those two judges
has paid off
352
00:18:07,044 --> 00:18:09,797
just as it did during
the Miss Teen America pageant.
353
00:18:09,880 --> 00:18:12,007
How can you vote
for Burns's movie?
354
00:18:12,091 --> 00:18:13,842
Let's just say it moved me...
355
00:18:13,926 --> 00:18:15,594
to a bigger house!
356
00:18:15,677 --> 00:18:18,972
Oops! I said the quiet part loud
and the loud part quiet.
357
00:18:19,056 --> 00:18:20,099
Dear.
358
00:18:20,182 --> 00:18:21,475
Two to two.
359
00:18:21,558 --> 00:18:23,227
Well, Homer,
it all comes down to you.
360
00:18:23,310 --> 00:18:24,228
Football in the groin!
361
00:18:24,311 --> 00:18:26,105
Football in the groin!
362
00:18:26,188 --> 00:18:28,732
Well, we're not going to resolve
this deadlock any time soon.
363
00:18:28,816 --> 00:18:31,193
Why don't we all take
a five-minute break?
364
00:18:31,276 --> 00:18:32,444
It'll clear our heads.
365
00:18:32,528 --> 00:18:33,654
Good idea, Marge.
366
00:18:33,737 --> 00:18:36,406
My mind is going
a mile a minute.
367
00:18:39,743 --> 00:18:41,662
I knew this would happen.
368
00:18:41,745 --> 00:18:42,996
I put you on the jury
369
00:18:43,080 --> 00:18:45,040
and you vote
for the stupidest film.
370
00:18:45,124 --> 00:18:47,042
I have every right
to be on that jury
371
00:18:47,126 --> 00:18:48,585
even though I got there
372
00:18:48,669 --> 00:18:50,587
by sleeping with
the head of the festival.
373
00:18:50,671 --> 00:18:52,923
How many times have
I heard Rex Reed say that?
374
00:18:53,006 --> 00:18:55,008
Aw great, now you're going
to make fun of me.
375
00:18:55,092 --> 00:18:56,927
No, Homer, I won't make fun,
376
00:18:57,010 --> 00:18:59,763
but I will suggest that there
may be better things in life
377
00:18:59,847 --> 00:19:03,225
than seeing a man get hit
in the groin with a football.
378
00:19:03,308 --> 00:19:04,768
Nelson:
Ha, ha!
379
00:19:04,852 --> 00:19:07,271
- Well, Homer?
- Marge...
380
00:19:07,354 --> 00:19:09,481
I've got some
serious thinking to do.
381
00:19:12,317 --> 00:19:15,112
Barney's movie had heart,
382
00:19:15,195 --> 00:19:18,740
but football in the groin
had a football in the groin.
383
00:19:18,824 --> 00:19:20,826
Don't cry for me.
384
00:19:20,909 --> 00:19:22,536
I'm already dead.
385
00:19:22,619 --> 00:19:25,080
Wow. I'll never drink
another beer.
386
00:19:25,164 --> 00:19:27,166
- Beer here!
- I'll take ten.
387
00:19:27,249 --> 00:19:29,877
And now to announce the winners.
388
00:19:29,960 --> 00:19:33,046
The award for Outstanding
Animated Short goes to:
389
00:19:33,130 --> 00:19:35,299
Itchy and Scratchy
for their film
390
00:19:35,382 --> 00:19:38,552
Four Funerals and a Wedding.
391
00:20:05,037 --> 00:20:08,373
And now, the winner
of the grand prize.
392
00:20:10,792 --> 00:20:12,544
Barney Gumble.
393
00:20:17,966 --> 00:20:19,843
Homie, you voted
for the right movie.
394
00:20:19,927 --> 00:20:23,305
I'm glad you were on the jury.
395
00:20:23,388 --> 00:20:25,849
Aw... you know
something, Marge?
396
00:20:25,933 --> 00:20:29,061
It's not that tough
being a film cricket.
397
00:20:29,144 --> 00:20:31,855
I've learned I have a gift
to share with the world.
398
00:20:31,939 --> 00:20:34,983
From now on, there'll be
a new Barnard Gumble...
399
00:20:35,067 --> 00:20:37,819
Hard-working, clean and sober.
400
00:20:37,903 --> 00:20:41,531
Congratulations, Barney,
and enjoy your grand prize...
401
00:20:41,615 --> 00:20:44,284
A lifetime supply of Duff beer.
402
00:20:44,368 --> 00:20:46,745
Just hook it to my veins!
403
00:20:48,038 --> 00:20:50,916
Good-bye, Mr. Sherman.
404
00:20:50,999 --> 00:20:52,143
If I ever play Carnegie Hall,
405
00:20:52,167 --> 00:20:53,543
I'll give you a call.
406
00:20:53,627 --> 00:20:55,671
And if you ever want
to visit my show...
407
00:20:55,754 --> 00:20:57,422
Nah, we're not going
to be doing that.
408
00:20:57,506 --> 00:20:59,883
Well, Jay, I hope you tell
your New York friends
409
00:20:59,967 --> 00:21:02,803
that people in small towns
arent quite as dumb as they think.
410
00:21:02,886 --> 00:21:04,054
Marge, look.
411
00:21:04,137 --> 00:21:05,681
This has spring snakes inside,
412
00:21:05,764 --> 00:21:08,433
but the suckers will
think it's beer nuts.
413
00:21:08,517 --> 00:21:10,435
Beer nuts.
414
00:21:10,519 --> 00:21:11,645
D'
415
00:21:11,728 --> 00:21:13,689
Well, it was a lovely festival.
416
00:21:13,772 --> 00:21:16,066
The best movie won,
and Mr. Burns found
417
00:21:16,149 --> 00:21:18,610
there are some awards
that can't be bought.
418
00:21:18,694 --> 00:21:21,196
And the Oscar goes to...
419
00:21:21,280 --> 00:21:22,990
I've got to win this one.
420
00:21:23,073 --> 00:21:24,992
I bribed everyone in Hollywood.
421
00:21:25,075 --> 00:21:28,453
George C. Scott in
Man Getting Hit by Football.
422
00:21:34,042 --> 00:21:36,378
Arr! My groin!
423
00:21:44,011 --> 00:21:46,221
♪♪
424
00:22:30,223 --> 00:22:31,223
Shh!
425
00:22:34,186 --> 00:22:37,397
CAPTIONS ENHANCED BY
ROUNDABOUT ENTERTAINMENT INC.
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