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1
00:00:06,046 --> 00:00:07,525
It's the final lap
2
00:00:07,549 --> 00:00:09,294
of the Springfield
Little Grand Prix,
3
00:00:09,318 --> 00:00:11,900
and the karts are tighter
than a royal corgi's collar
4
00:00:11,924 --> 00:00:14,563
as they head into Lard Lad turn.
5
00:00:17,401 --> 00:00:19,247
We have contact! Things
are looking bloody grim
6
00:00:19,271 --> 00:00:23,823
for the rising star of
KF-1... Kids Formula One...
7
00:00:23,847 --> 00:00:25,661
Lisa Simpson.
8
00:00:25,685 --> 00:00:27,565
Simpson spins out!
9
00:00:31,830 --> 00:00:33,743
Look
at that icy calm.
10
00:00:33,767 --> 00:00:34,946
Clearly, this pre-tween dynamo
11
00:00:34,970 --> 00:00:38,053
has never felt a
modicum of unease
12
00:00:38,077 --> 00:00:41,292
in any automobile.
13
00:00:41,316 --> 00:00:42,829
Dad!
14
00:00:42,853 --> 00:00:44,733
You're gonna hit the median.
15
00:00:44,757 --> 00:00:46,703
All part of the plan.
16
00:00:52,371 --> 00:00:54,018
Aah!
17
00:00:54,042 --> 00:00:56,857
Bart, soccer
practice. Go, go, go!
18
00:00:56,881 --> 00:00:57,526
Whoa!
19
00:00:57,550 --> 00:01:00,320
Goal...!
20
00:01:01,122 --> 00:01:05,397
Dad, please, you don't
have to hurry like this.
21
00:01:06,433 --> 00:01:08,412
Cut me off? I cut you off!
22
00:01:08,436 --> 00:01:12,287
He didn't cut you
off, he's just driving!
23
00:01:12,311 --> 00:01:13,891
Hope you like
brakes because today
24
00:01:13,915 --> 00:01:17,765
it's all-you-can-eat, baby.
25
00:01:19,926 --> 00:01:21,873
Dad, stop
26
00:01:21,897 --> 00:01:23,611
brake checking
27
00:01:23,635 --> 00:01:25,146
him.
28
00:01:25,170 --> 00:01:26,482
Speed bump, sweetie.
29
00:01:26,506 --> 00:01:27,775
We're gonna get a little air.
30
00:01:31,850 --> 00:01:35,400
Ugh. I hate when we're early.
31
00:01:35,424 --> 00:01:37,638
Mr. and Mrs.
Simpson, as you know,
32
00:01:37,662 --> 00:01:39,341
Lisa has been feeling
a lack of control,
33
00:01:39,365 --> 00:01:42,080
which feeds her
generalized anxiety.
34
00:01:42,104 --> 00:01:44,786
I know, I know.
It's getting worse.
35
00:01:44,810 --> 00:01:46,355
Her twitch jumped eyes.
36
00:01:46,379 --> 00:01:49,629
She used to be a righty.
Where will it jump next?
37
00:01:49,653 --> 00:01:51,031
Mm...
38
00:01:51,055 --> 00:01:54,071
Mom, do you have to do that now?
39
00:01:54,095 --> 00:01:56,008
I knit when I'm worried.
40
00:01:56,032 --> 00:01:59,014
Marge is our family
designated worrier,
41
00:01:59,038 --> 00:02:01,252
which frees me up
to be the cool dad.
42
00:02:01,276 --> 00:02:03,413
Plus, I get some
awesome worry swag.
43
00:02:04,381 --> 00:02:07,498
Marge made this when Bart
swallowed a nine-volt battery
44
00:02:07,522 --> 00:02:10,260
and I had to track it
with a stud finder.
45
00:02:12,666 --> 00:02:13,200
Well...
46
00:02:13,333 --> 00:02:15,079
I asked you both here today
47
00:02:15,103 --> 00:02:18,086
because Lisa made a
significant breakthrough
48
00:02:18,110 --> 00:02:19,722
at her last session.
49
00:02:19,746 --> 00:02:20,991
Oh, that's wonderful.
50
00:02:21,015 --> 00:02:23,997
Doctor, I can't
thank you enough.
51
00:02:24,021 --> 00:02:26,234
This is such a relief.
52
00:02:26,258 --> 00:02:29,942
Lisa, whatever it is that's
causing your anxiety,
53
00:02:29,966 --> 00:02:32,113
we will walk through
hell to fix it.
54
00:02:32,137 --> 00:02:36,088
Well, Mr. Simpson,
it's your driving.
55
00:02:36,112 --> 00:02:40,220
What did you just say to me?
56
00:02:42,057 --> 00:02:43,904
Well, Dad, um, you know,
57
00:02:43,928 --> 00:02:45,974
you can be a little
aggressive behind the wheel.
58
00:02:45,998 --> 00:02:49,081
I drive at the speed of traffic.
59
00:02:49,105 --> 00:02:50,785
You can at least
listen to Doctor...
60
00:02:50,809 --> 00:02:53,188
Lenny thinks I drive cool.
61
00:02:53,212 --> 00:02:54,959
Everything is always my fault.
62
00:02:54,983 --> 00:02:55,895
Well, two can play at that game.
63
00:02:55,919 --> 00:02:58,667
I say you're a terrible driver.
64
00:02:58,691 --> 00:03:01,071
I'm much faster
than you.
65
00:03:04,468 --> 00:03:07,675
Doctor, I'm so sorry about...
66
00:03:08,276 --> 00:03:10,190
You have some nerve
67
00:03:10,214 --> 00:03:12,393
putting these thoughts
in my daughter's head.
68
00:03:12,417 --> 00:03:15,033
Mr. Simpson, can we please
continue this conversation
69
00:03:15,057 --> 00:03:16,903
when you're not driving?
70
00:03:18,296 --> 00:03:20,911
Go around. Go around.
71
00:03:20,935 --> 00:03:23,750
Aah!
72
00:03:23,774 --> 00:03:25,153
Aah!
73
00:03:25,177 --> 00:03:26,989
Did you flip over?
74
00:03:27,013 --> 00:03:29,284
I'm not the one on trial here.
75
00:03:30,153 --> 00:03:31,299
Your trial's in two weeks.
76
00:03:31,323 --> 00:03:34,539
Hey, Doc! Great
work with Ralphie.
77
00:03:34,563 --> 00:03:37,343
We can keep aluminum
foil in the house again.
78
00:03:37,367 --> 00:03:39,906
Uh, we'll pick this up later.
79
00:03:41,911 --> 00:03:44,324
Doctor, what can we do?
80
00:03:44,348 --> 00:03:46,720
Well, I have one idea.
81
00:03:48,056 --> 00:03:51,371
Here, we practice
immersion therapy.
82
00:03:51,395 --> 00:03:53,442
We expose patients
to their phobias
83
00:03:53,466 --> 00:03:56,883
so their habituated response
can decrease over time.
84
00:03:58,076 --> 00:04:00,189
Monsters.
85
00:04:00,213 --> 00:04:02,227
Monsters all. Ow!
86
00:04:02,251 --> 00:04:05,133
So, he's afraid of
germs on toilet seats.
87
00:04:05,157 --> 00:04:07,337
No, he's afraid of
rotisserie chicken.
88
00:04:07,361 --> 00:04:10,309
Lisa, if we can use
this exposure treatment
89
00:04:10,333 --> 00:04:12,280
to get you comfortable in cars,
90
00:04:12,304 --> 00:04:14,652
that might help you overcome
your other anxieties.
91
00:04:14,676 --> 00:04:17,323
Okay, I'll do whatever it takes.
92
00:04:17,347 --> 00:04:20,262
Well, I must warn
you, it won't be fun.
93
00:04:25,397 --> 00:04:27,009
By driving a go-kart,
94
00:04:27,033 --> 00:04:28,312
you can feel a
measure of control
95
00:04:28,336 --> 00:04:29,849
in your relationship
with motor vehicles.
96
00:04:29,873 --> 00:04:31,919
I don't want to drive.
97
00:04:31,943 --> 00:04:32,889
Just put me back on the pills.
98
00:04:32,913 --> 00:04:33,957
No wait, no pills.
99
00:04:33,981 --> 00:04:35,460
They make me feel nothing.
100
00:04:35,484 --> 00:04:37,230
But my room has
never been cleaner.
101
00:04:37,254 --> 00:04:38,165
But I never laugh.
102
00:04:38,189 --> 00:04:39,135
But there's a calm in that.
103
00:04:39,159 --> 00:04:42,207
But the sound of the
grass growing is loud!
104
00:04:42,231 --> 00:04:44,211
Lisa! It's going
to be all right.
105
00:04:44,235 --> 00:04:47,952
Take a breath and
give it a little gas.
106
00:04:47,976 --> 00:04:49,889
No! I am not doing this.
107
00:04:49,913 --> 00:04:51,683
I am putting my foot down.
108
00:04:52,819 --> 00:04:53,997
Aah! See?
109
00:04:54,021 --> 00:04:56,101
I could have killed a tire.
110
00:04:56,125 --> 00:04:59,074
Well, we tried.
111
00:04:59,098 --> 00:05:00,276
I am out of here.
112
00:05:00,300 --> 00:05:02,147
Gonna get this back
to the starting area,
113
00:05:02,171 --> 00:05:04,118
and...
114
00:05:04,142 --> 00:05:06,990
Oh... That wasn't so bad.
115
00:05:09,719 --> 00:05:10,320
Zippy.
116
00:05:10,386 --> 00:05:12,535
We can try other approaches.
117
00:05:12,559 --> 00:05:14,839
They're making up new
therapies all the time.
118
00:05:14,863 --> 00:05:18,145
Mm. I really hoped
this one would work.
119
00:05:18,169 --> 00:05:20,116
It's working!
120
00:05:20,140 --> 00:05:22,086
I'm finally in control.
121
00:05:22,110 --> 00:05:23,857
Oh! Doctor, you cured her.
122
00:05:23,881 --> 00:05:25,995
We don't like to
use the word "cure."
123
00:05:28,089 --> 00:05:29,702
But I'm okay with "miracle."
124
00:05:36,406 --> 00:05:39,522
Johannes
on Schwarzvalder III
125
00:05:39,546 --> 00:05:40,858
cuts that turn sharper
than his mother
126
00:05:40,882 --> 00:05:42,127
cuts the crust off his
egg and cress sandwiches.
127
00:05:43,520 --> 00:05:45,824
He might hit 30 miles an hour!
128
00:05:46,993 --> 00:05:51,035
One small slip up means
a playdate with disaster
129
00:05:52,371 --> 00:05:54,576
unsupervised!
130
00:06:05,330 --> 00:06:07,310
After dominating local races,
131
00:06:07,334 --> 00:06:10,618
Lisa Simpson will
make her debut in KF-1
132
00:06:10,642 --> 00:06:14,291
the top international
go-kart circuit.
133
00:06:14,315 --> 00:06:16,162
For the first time,
race fans worldwide
134
00:06:16,186 --> 00:06:17,698
will be able to witness.
135
00:06:17,722 --> 00:06:21,004
Lisa's steely
confidence on the track.
136
00:06:21,028 --> 00:06:22,307
I can't wait to get out there.
137
00:06:22,331 --> 00:06:24,378
For me, it's not about
winning or losing,
138
00:06:24,402 --> 00:06:25,748
it's about control.
139
00:06:25,772 --> 00:06:29,421
I used to be this big
bundle of worry and anxiety,
140
00:06:29,445 --> 00:06:31,291
but on the track, the
world is going so fast,
141
00:06:31,315 --> 00:06:34,832
yet I am in complete command.
142
00:06:34,856 --> 00:06:37,070
The stillness at
the center of power.
143
00:06:37,094 --> 00:06:39,040
I feel it everywhere.
144
00:06:39,064 --> 00:06:42,113
The other day, I got
my first A-minus ever
145
00:06:42,137 --> 00:06:44,184
on a test, no biggie.
146
00:06:44,208 --> 00:06:46,254
Uh-oh. Am I allowed to do that?
147
00:06:46,278 --> 00:06:48,459
Will
I lose more points?
148
00:06:48,483 --> 00:06:50,129
Does anyone have tape?
149
00:06:50,153 --> 00:06:52,568
Lisa is very good at her job
150
00:06:52,592 --> 00:06:55,841
of driving around and around.
151
00:06:55,865 --> 00:06:59,047
Her unshakable demeanor
has everyone asking
152
00:06:59,071 --> 00:07:02,086
where did this fearless
phenom come from?
153
00:07:02,110 --> 00:07:05,059
Is she the scion of a
Greek shipping magnate?
154
00:07:05,083 --> 00:07:07,497
Or the scion of a
Dutch shipping magnate?
155
00:07:07,521 --> 00:07:09,435
Just what nationality of magnate
156
00:07:09,459 --> 00:07:11,973
is she the scion of?
157
00:07:11,997 --> 00:07:15,179
The truth is she's from an
obscure racing backwater
158
00:07:15,203 --> 00:07:18,285
called... and I hope I'm
pronouncing this correctly...
159
00:07:18,309 --> 00:07:19,956
America.
160
00:07:19,980 --> 00:07:23,229
Her mother is a housewife
with no family fortune
161
00:07:23,253 --> 00:07:24,832
or rich dead husband.
162
00:07:24,856 --> 00:07:27,169
Her pathetic existence
peppered only
163
00:07:27,193 --> 00:07:29,876
with the mildest of victories.
164
00:07:29,900 --> 00:07:32,046
Found it.
165
00:07:32,070 --> 00:07:34,519
A life squandered.
166
00:07:34,543 --> 00:07:37,423
Lisa's father...
a bald, simpering,
167
00:07:37,447 --> 00:07:40,631
morbidly obese drain on society
168
00:07:40,655 --> 00:07:43,503
has been sentenced
to community service
169
00:07:43,527 --> 00:07:46,374
for a reckless
driving conviction.
170
00:07:46,398 --> 00:07:48,145
Am I going to look
okay in this show?
171
00:07:48,169 --> 00:07:50,350
I don't see how.
172
00:07:50,374 --> 00:07:51,920
Oh!
173
00:07:51,944 --> 00:07:53,823
D'oh!
174
00:07:53,847 --> 00:07:55,627
And despite her
dollar-store upbringing,
175
00:07:55,651 --> 00:07:59,702
Lisa Simpson stands poised
for international glory
176
00:07:59,726 --> 00:08:02,774
in this fall's KF-1
karting season,
177
00:08:02,798 --> 00:08:05,179
which coincidentally
will take place
178
00:08:05,203 --> 00:08:07,918
in her hometown of Springfield.
179
00:08:07,942 --> 00:08:11,024
We are happy to welcome
these wealthy child racers
180
00:08:11,048 --> 00:08:13,997
and their smoking-hot
trophy moms.
181
00:08:14,021 --> 00:08:15,057
Oh, yes!
182
00:08:15,190 --> 00:08:18,773
European racing teams have
descended upon Springfield.
183
00:08:18,797 --> 00:08:21,411
And as always, the crew to beat
184
00:08:21,435 --> 00:08:24,619
is Italy's Team Dooshé.
185
00:08:24,643 --> 00:08:27,624
Their charismatic
star is Paolo Paoletti
186
00:08:27,648 --> 00:08:31,933
son of tracksuit mogul
Fila Fendi Paoletti
187
00:08:31,957 --> 00:08:36,174
in the number seven Children's
Strength Tylenol kart.
188
00:08:36,198 --> 00:08:38,312
America is such
189
00:08:38,336 --> 00:08:41,317
a wonderfully
disgusting country.
190
00:08:41,341 --> 00:08:44,424
All the guns and
the billhillies,
191
00:08:44,448 --> 00:08:47,196
and all of the television
shows about Chicago.
192
00:08:47,220 --> 00:08:50,604
The fire, the police,
193
00:08:50,628 --> 00:08:54,679
the man bear who makes
the beef sandwich.
194
00:08:54,703 --> 00:08:57,818
Oh, Paolo love. Boof.
195
00:08:57,842 --> 00:09:00,524
In a setback to their
jet-setting lifestyles,
196
00:09:00,548 --> 00:09:03,429
Paolo and the other
European go-karters
197
00:09:03,453 --> 00:09:04,556
must attend public school
198
00:09:04,656 --> 00:09:10,042
under the watchful eye of
broken, faceless bureaucrats.
199
00:09:10,066 --> 00:09:11,512
I have a face.
200
00:09:11,536 --> 00:09:13,281
Even though these kids
are impossibly wealthy,
201
00:09:13,305 --> 00:09:14,551
I think they'll fit right in.
202
00:09:14,575 --> 00:09:17,123
- They didn't.
- How do you know?
203
00:09:17,147 --> 00:09:18,191
It hasn't happened yet.
204
00:09:18,215 --> 00:09:19,562
But then it did.
205
00:09:19,586 --> 00:09:23,503
Hey, I asked for
vitello alla caper.
206
00:09:23,527 --> 00:09:26,040
What is this?
207
00:09:26,064 --> 00:09:27,745
Beanie weenies.
208
00:09:27,769 --> 00:09:30,951
Why do you hate my mouth?
209
00:09:30,975 --> 00:09:31,319
Huh?
210
00:09:31,343 --> 00:09:35,326
Why?
211
00:09:35,350 --> 00:09:37,697
Look at that
sad foreign kid.
212
00:09:37,721 --> 00:09:41,606
He just needs a regular
American to reach out
213
00:09:41,630 --> 00:09:43,576
and take advantage of him.
214
00:09:43,600 --> 00:09:44,345
Is there some problem here?
215
00:09:44,369 --> 00:09:47,250
This rectangle lady
216
00:09:47,274 --> 00:09:49,589
is trying to poison Paolo.
217
00:09:49,613 --> 00:09:51,358
Dry your eyes, Pinocchio.
218
00:09:51,382 --> 00:09:53,395
I'm the guy that can make
stuff happen around here.
219
00:09:53,419 --> 00:09:56,669
If just might cost you a little.
220
00:09:56,693 --> 00:09:57,737
Whatever it takes.
221
00:09:57,761 --> 00:09:58,840
I give you one of each color.
222
00:09:58,864 --> 00:10:02,003
Purple, blue,
green, purple again.
223
00:10:03,206 --> 00:10:04,451
Mmm!
224
00:10:04,475 --> 00:10:06,589
Delizioso.
225
00:10:06,613 --> 00:10:10,764
Finally, somebody around
here with no accent.
226
00:10:10,788 --> 00:10:13,401
Mwah. Bartolomeo, you
make Paolo so happy.
227
00:10:13,425 --> 00:10:17,478
You are Team Dooshé now.
228
00:10:17,502 --> 00:10:20,617
I'm make it rain on you.
229
00:10:20,641 --> 00:10:22,343
Boof, boof, boof, boof!
230
00:10:23,613 --> 00:10:24,691
Gentlekids,
231
00:10:24,715 --> 00:10:27,598
start your two-stroke engines.
232
00:10:27,622 --> 00:10:28,800
I can't believe it,
233
00:10:28,824 --> 00:10:32,273
my girl's first
international go-kart race.
234
00:10:32,297 --> 00:10:34,244
Did you put on sunblock?
235
00:10:34,268 --> 00:10:35,580
I'm in a fireproof suit.
236
00:10:35,604 --> 00:10:37,016
Oh, your father's here.
237
00:10:37,040 --> 00:10:39,755
He's finished with
his community service.
238
00:10:39,779 --> 00:10:41,926
He can finally watch me race.
239
00:10:41,950 --> 00:10:44,665
I wouldn't miss seeing
my little Danica Patrick
240
00:10:44,689 --> 00:10:46,636
for all the Jolly
Ranchers in the piñata.
241
00:10:46,660 --> 00:10:50,901
The kids
never check the legs.
242
00:10:55,043 --> 00:10:57,691
Now, honey, I know
they're going fast,
243
00:10:57,715 --> 00:11:00,362
but I'm sure Lisa's safe.
244
00:11:00,386 --> 00:11:02,702
There's nothing to worry about.
245
00:11:02,726 --> 00:11:03,970
Oh, I'm not worried.
246
00:11:03,994 --> 00:11:06,576
Come on, you got to
be a little worried.
247
00:11:06,600 --> 00:11:09,481
Nope. I've seen Lisa
race a dozen times.
248
00:11:09,505 --> 00:11:12,019
She's really good
and she's safe.
249
00:11:12,043 --> 00:11:13,990
But-but you're the family's
designated worrier.
250
00:11:14,014 --> 00:11:16,963
If you're not worried, that
means there's a worry vacuum
251
00:11:16,987 --> 00:11:20,928
that I have to fill, and
vacuuming is also your job.
252
00:11:23,266 --> 00:11:25,412
Oh, my God, look how
fast she's going.
253
00:11:25,436 --> 00:11:27,551
I'm not concerned in the least.
254
00:11:27,575 --> 00:11:29,387
And me am concerned in the most.
255
00:11:29,411 --> 00:11:31,826
I need the stress yarn.
256
00:11:31,850 --> 00:11:33,997
Relax, Homie, she's winning.
257
00:11:34,021 --> 00:11:36,869
Which means she's going
faster than everybody else.
258
00:11:36,893 --> 00:11:37,739
What am I even knitting?
259
00:11:37,763 --> 00:11:40,399
Oh, it's golf club covers.
260
00:11:48,015 --> 00:11:49,351
Boof!
261
00:11:50,854 --> 00:11:53,860
Time for your bedtime
sweet dream routine.
262
00:11:54,729 --> 00:11:57,845
Here's your night
terror teddies,
263
00:11:57,869 --> 00:12:01,441
and I'll set the night-light
to Boogeyman Banisher.
264
00:12:03,714 --> 00:12:05,727
Dad, I don't need all that.
265
00:12:05,751 --> 00:12:07,631
I don't have anxiety anymore.
266
00:12:07,655 --> 00:12:11,371
- And I have you to thank for it.
- Me?
267
00:12:11,395 --> 00:12:13,510
Yes. Your unhinged driving
268
00:12:13,534 --> 00:12:16,281
made me face my fears and
get into go-kart racing.
269
00:12:16,305 --> 00:12:19,321
This is on you.
270
00:12:21,583 --> 00:12:23,987
All my fault. All on me.
271
00:12:25,525 --> 00:12:29,030
It's me, Lisa Mario.
272
00:12:34,542 --> 00:12:37,825
Woo-hoo! Thanks to my papa,
273
00:12:37,849 --> 00:12:39,795
I'm-a risking my life.
274
00:12:39,819 --> 00:12:43,192
And I'm a dream
version of Milhouse.
275
00:12:44,328 --> 00:12:45,496
Aah!
276
00:12:46,800 --> 00:12:49,080
It's-a me, Wario.
277
00:12:49,104 --> 00:12:52,654
My bad parenting has
lead to your doom.
278
00:12:53,447 --> 00:12:56,663
Trauma bomb! Wah!
279
00:12:56,687 --> 00:12:58,098
Aah!
280
00:12:58,122 --> 00:13:01,271
It's-a me, Wario! It's
all my fault! Wah!
281
00:13:02,698 --> 00:13:05,781
So, Paolo, you liking this vibe?
282
00:13:05,805 --> 00:13:07,551
Not enough bass? Too much bass?
283
00:13:07,575 --> 00:13:10,279
Less bass is gonna cost.
284
00:13:13,620 --> 00:13:15,767
Ketchup bottle service.
285
00:13:15,791 --> 00:13:17,805
You make it just like Milan,
286
00:13:17,829 --> 00:13:20,510
except here everyone
is fat and ugly.
287
00:13:20,534 --> 00:13:21,445
Bartolucci, I love you.
288
00:13:21,469 --> 00:13:23,783
Here is money.
289
00:13:23,807 --> 00:13:26,622
Excuse me, Signor Spaghetti,
290
00:13:26,646 --> 00:13:28,191
there's somebody at the door.
291
00:13:28,215 --> 00:13:30,531
He's not on the list and he
claims to be the principal.
292
00:13:30,555 --> 00:13:31,966
I am the principal.
293
00:13:31,990 --> 00:13:35,439
Bart Simpson, I need to
see you in my office,
294
00:13:35,463 --> 00:13:36,742
which this is.
295
00:13:36,766 --> 00:13:39,681
Bartissimo, this
polyester tie man
296
00:13:39,705 --> 00:13:41,351
he make-a me sad.
297
00:13:41,375 --> 00:13:43,054
Leave this to me.
298
00:13:43,078 --> 00:13:45,727
Seymour, why don't you
take the afternoon off?
299
00:13:45,751 --> 00:13:48,700
Here, get your
mother's tires rotated.
300
00:13:48,724 --> 00:13:51,037
That better not be a
euphemism, young man.
301
00:13:51,061 --> 00:13:53,042
Principal Skinner,
I need some help
302
00:13:53,066 --> 00:13:55,681
with the obituary for
the class hamster.
303
00:13:55,705 --> 00:13:58,451
Is the correct wording
"died by suicide"
304
00:13:58,475 --> 00:13:59,622
or "of suicide"?
305
00:14:00,815 --> 00:14:03,596
Oh, look, everyone,
it's my archrival.
306
00:14:03,620 --> 00:14:07,036
Oh, enjoy your one win.
307
00:14:07,060 --> 00:14:08,840
You are only a flash in the pan.
308
00:14:08,864 --> 00:14:11,746
I am the breaded
veal in the pan.
309
00:14:11,770 --> 00:14:14,819
Paolo will be atop
the podium again.
310
00:14:14,843 --> 00:14:18,516
I'm sure you will.
You're a terrific driver.
311
00:14:19,586 --> 00:14:21,131
Oh! See how she mocks me?
312
00:14:21,155 --> 00:14:23,468
Bart, I hate her and
her whole family.
313
00:14:23,492 --> 00:14:27,009
Say cruel things about this
girl so I may agree with them.
314
00:14:27,033 --> 00:14:30,383
Well, I've never met her before,
but I can tell by her vibe
315
00:14:30,407 --> 00:14:33,121
that she's an animal-kissing,
Wikipedia-editing middle child
316
00:14:33,145 --> 00:14:35,192
who burps broccoli
and farts tofu
317
00:14:35,216 --> 00:14:37,396
and won't do her
brother's homework,
318
00:14:37,420 --> 00:14:38,556
even for euros.
319
00:14:40,026 --> 00:14:43,609
And yet this girl you
have no connection to
320
00:14:43,633 --> 00:14:44,744
she beats me.
321
00:14:44,768 --> 00:14:46,749
My thumb is raw
322
00:14:46,773 --> 00:14:48,351
from all of the doing-a this.
323
00:14:51,782 --> 00:14:53,496
That's a boof.
324
00:14:54,889 --> 00:14:56,526
Coming, Mom.
325
00:14:57,427 --> 00:14:58,640
I can't let you go.
326
00:14:58,664 --> 00:15:00,442
Racing is too dangerous.
327
00:15:00,466 --> 00:15:02,179
Dad, it's fine.
328
00:15:02,203 --> 00:15:04,250
But I had a dream last
night that I was Wario
329
00:15:04,274 --> 00:15:06,789
and I bombed you off of
Rainbow Road into oblivion.
330
00:15:06,813 --> 00:15:08,927
I'm not in danger just
because you dreamed
331
00:15:08,951 --> 00:15:13,369
a bunch of crazy
stuff from Mario Kart.
332
00:15:13,393 --> 00:15:14,672
What's Mario Kart?
333
00:15:14,696 --> 00:15:17,142
I am going to the race.
334
00:15:17,166 --> 00:15:19,280
It's my job to keep you safe.
335
00:15:19,304 --> 00:15:22,888
You never cared about that when
you were driving like a maniac.
336
00:15:22,912 --> 00:15:25,358
Well, through some
miracle of therapy,
337
00:15:25,382 --> 00:15:28,398
I'm in the driver's seat
now, and I'm enjoying myself,
338
00:15:28,422 --> 00:15:31,672
and that's when you choose
to care about my safety?!
339
00:15:31,696 --> 00:15:34,044
You summed up things perfectly.
340
00:15:34,068 --> 00:15:35,647
So you'll stay home?
341
00:15:35,671 --> 00:15:38,175
No. I'm in control.
342
00:15:40,046 --> 00:15:44,196
Marge, stop her. I've
never been more worried.
343
00:15:44,220 --> 00:15:45,700
Well, I've never
been more relaxed.
344
00:15:45,724 --> 00:15:48,005
Hey, Mom, can I drive?
345
00:15:48,029 --> 00:15:49,197
Sure, give it a shot.
346
00:15:49,899 --> 00:15:51,368
No!
347
00:15:58,951 --> 00:16:00,362
the KF-1 karting season
348
00:16:00,386 --> 00:16:03,569
culminates in a two-mile
loop through Springfield.
349
00:16:03,593 --> 00:16:05,439
A sad ruin, once home
350
00:16:05,463 --> 00:16:09,213
to a thriving nipple tassel
manufacturing industry.
351
00:16:09,237 --> 00:16:12,052
Stupid Dad, worried
about my safety.
352
00:16:12,076 --> 00:16:14,958
Remember the time he forgot
me at a Renaissance fair?
353
00:16:14,982 --> 00:16:17,196
I had to get a ride home
from the turkey leg wench.
354
00:16:17,220 --> 00:16:20,837
Oh, honey, your dad's not used
to being the one who's nervous.
355
00:16:20,861 --> 00:16:23,609
He just wants what's
best for himself.
356
00:16:23,633 --> 00:16:25,145
Thanks for flying out, Bippe.
357
00:16:25,169 --> 00:16:26,749
I
know Paolo cannot race
358
00:16:26,773 --> 00:16:28,418
without his secret weapon.
359
00:16:28,442 --> 00:16:28,987
Andiamo!
360
00:16:35,925 --> 00:16:38,539
Aw, Bart.
361
00:16:38,563 --> 00:16:41,745
You remember that
Paolo likes gelato
362
00:16:41,769 --> 00:16:44,217
after I told you over and over
363
00:16:44,241 --> 00:16:46,021
that I like gelato.
364
00:16:46,045 --> 00:16:49,093
You are my fratello
365
00:16:49,117 --> 00:16:50,395
from another mamma mia.
366
00:16:50,419 --> 00:16:54,337
Oh, you must be Bart's
new Italian friend.
367
00:16:54,361 --> 00:16:55,506
Well, good luck in the race.
368
00:16:55,530 --> 00:16:59,013
You're gonna need it
to beat Bart's sister.
369
00:17:00,472 --> 00:17:02,153
Bart Simpson,
370
00:17:02,177 --> 00:17:04,089
you are the brother
371
00:17:04,113 --> 00:17:05,392
of Lisa Simpson?
372
00:17:05,416 --> 00:17:09,033
Um, uh, well, um, only by blood.
373
00:17:09,057 --> 00:17:11,137
Traditore!
374
00:17:11,161 --> 00:17:12,664
No, no.
375
00:17:37,447 --> 00:17:40,285
Monday, Tuesday,
Thursday, Wednesday!
376
00:17:40,987 --> 00:17:44,103
Mwah. Bart, you
break-a my heart,
377
00:17:44,127 --> 00:17:45,439
like snap-a the bread stick.
378
00:17:45,463 --> 00:17:47,233
Boof.
379
00:17:49,872 --> 00:17:50,872
Aah!
380
00:17:51,943 --> 00:17:53,722
You're not watching the race?
381
00:17:53,746 --> 00:17:57,564
I'm too worried about
Lisa. My only daughter...
382
00:17:57,588 --> 00:17:58,666
Uh, there's Maggie.
383
00:17:58,690 --> 00:18:01,471
Is rocketing around on
a flaming death-mobile!
384
00:18:01,495 --> 00:18:04,511
Why does no one else
care about Lisa's safety?
385
00:18:04,535 --> 00:18:05,913
She's fine. See?
386
00:18:05,937 --> 00:18:06,750
From
the pole position,
387
00:18:06,774 --> 00:18:08,653
Lisa Simpson immediately
388
00:18:08,677 --> 00:18:10,222
takes the initiative.
389
00:18:10,246 --> 00:18:11,458
What's initiative?
390
00:18:11,482 --> 00:18:13,662
Why does she have
it? Is it safe?
391
00:18:14,989 --> 00:18:16,367
Stupid Team Dooshé.
392
00:18:16,391 --> 00:18:17,237
Those euro jerks
forgot to remove me
393
00:18:17,261 --> 00:18:19,732
from their text thread.
394
00:18:21,067 --> 00:18:22,079
"Sabotaggio"?
395
00:18:22,103 --> 00:18:24,116
Sabotaggio?
396
00:18:24,140 --> 00:18:26,454
Ooh, is that some kind
of delicious spiced ham?
397
00:18:26,478 --> 00:18:28,358
It means they
sabotaged Lisa's kart!
398
00:18:28,382 --> 00:18:31,197
Oh, God, I knew
she was in danger.
399
00:18:31,221 --> 00:18:33,101
My overreacting is now just
400
00:18:33,125 --> 00:18:35,139
reacting.
401
00:18:35,163 --> 00:18:38,044
It's the final lap of
the Springfield Little Grand Prix,
402
00:18:38,068 --> 00:18:40,282
and the karts are tighter
than a royal corgi's collar
403
00:18:40,306 --> 00:18:43,388
as they head into Lard Lad turn.
404
00:18:43,412 --> 00:18:45,425
Perfecto, Team Dooshé.
405
00:18:45,449 --> 00:18:48,455
You loosened all the bolts
on Lisa's kart. Boof!
406
00:18:51,428 --> 00:18:53,866
We have contact!
407
00:18:55,804 --> 00:18:59,210
In the storm, I am the
calm at the center.
408
00:19:01,515 --> 00:19:04,999
Why is her wheel
not-a falling off?
409
00:19:05,023 --> 00:19:07,159
Aah!
410
00:19:09,063 --> 00:19:10,375
Sabotaggio.
411
00:19:10,399 --> 00:19:13,114
Okay, missing a
wheel, no brakes,
412
00:19:13,138 --> 00:19:15,987
still in control.
413
00:19:16,011 --> 00:19:18,257
Okay, now I'm not in control,
414
00:19:18,281 --> 00:19:19,961
but still calm.
415
00:19:19,985 --> 00:19:23,034
Wow, I have a great therapist.
416
00:19:23,058 --> 00:19:24,695
She's gonna die!
417
00:19:28,603 --> 00:19:30,014
Marge, I learned my
lesson. I was right.
418
00:19:30,038 --> 00:19:32,476
Lisa's not safe.
419
00:19:33,245 --> 00:19:35,215
Aah! Sabotaggio!
420
00:19:41,395 --> 00:19:44,410
- Dad!
- Don't worry, sweetie.
421
00:19:44,434 --> 00:19:45,646
I'm gonna get you
out of this mess
422
00:19:45,670 --> 00:19:47,416
the way I got you
into this mess:
423
00:19:47,440 --> 00:19:50,680
By driving like a maniac!
424
00:19:53,185 --> 00:19:54,855
Stay behind me.
425
00:19:56,625 --> 00:19:58,606
Aw, you're brake checking me.
426
00:19:58,630 --> 00:20:02,938
But now I'm brake
checking with love.
427
00:20:05,810 --> 00:20:07,356
Oh! I-a lose.
428
00:20:07,380 --> 00:20:10,930
This sport is stupid-o.
429
00:20:10,954 --> 00:20:13,368
And now I fade away to Ibiza
430
00:20:13,392 --> 00:20:17,209
to a quiet life as a beach DJ.
431
00:20:17,233 --> 00:20:19,303
Boof.
432
00:20:21,408 --> 00:20:25,091
Dad, thank you. You've
made me feel safe.
433
00:20:25,115 --> 00:20:27,965
And I always will.
434
00:20:41,683 --> 00:20:42,317
Captioning sponsored by
20th CENTURY FOX TELEVISION
435
00:20:42,384 --> 00:20:45,165
and FOX BROADCASTING COMPANY
436
00:20:45,189 --> 00:20:46,702
and TOYOTA.
437
00:20:46,726 --> 00:20:48,886
Captioned by Media Access
Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org.
438
00:21:31,683 --> 00:21:32,683
Shh.
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