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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:21,115 Riley. 2 00:01:23,616 --> 00:01:25,755 Hedda, that outfit looks amazing. 3 00:01:26,119 --> 00:01:27,325 Well, they loved it at city hall! 4 00:01:27,487 --> 00:01:30,627 Yes, it's always impressive when a priest wears knock off Pucci. 5 00:01:30,790 --> 00:01:32,633 What would you expect? Vatican drag? 6 00:01:32,792 --> 00:01:34,135 No, but what'd the groom think? 7 00:01:34,294 --> 00:01:36,296 Why do you think they're shipping her off to Vermont? 8 00:01:36,463 --> 00:01:37,635 Exactly. 9 00:01:37,764 --> 00:01:38,742 Riley! 10 00:01:41,868 --> 00:01:44,144 Hey guys, this is my other half, Riley. 11 00:01:44,304 --> 00:01:46,341 We've read all about you on Markus' blog. 12 00:01:46,506 --> 00:01:47,576 Oh, how's the rash? 13 00:01:47,740 --> 00:01:49,845 Yeah! Has it cleared it up yet? 14 00:01:50,210 --> 00:01:51,450 Markus claims to have writer's block 15 00:01:51,611 --> 00:01:53,215 but all he does is blog, blog, biog! 16 00:01:53,379 --> 00:01:54,687 I didn't know you had writer's block! 17 00:01:55,181 --> 00:01:56,251 That's because he hasn't blogged about it. 18 00:01:56,416 --> 00:01:57,827 I'm just a little stuck on my new novel. 19 00:01:58,184 --> 00:01:58,753 Oh, what's it about? 20 00:01:59,119 --> 00:02:01,622 It's about a gay couple having a biological child. 21 00:02:01,821 --> 00:02:02,799 So it's horror? 22 00:02:03,857 --> 00:02:07,304 If we had kids, could you imagine what we would be doing right now? 23 00:02:07,660 --> 00:02:08,638 Carpooling? 24 00:02:11,731 --> 00:02:13,369 You blogged about my rash? 25 00:02:13,600 --> 00:02:14,578 Sorry, honey. 26 00:02:14,734 --> 00:02:15,678 Baby. 27 00:02:26,346 --> 00:02:27,324 Hey Zeus. 28 00:02:28,248 --> 00:02:29,420 Do you take change? 29 00:02:30,416 --> 00:02:32,157 You cheap little bitch. 30 00:02:32,318 --> 00:02:35,492 Sodomites, this is about me for once! 31 00:02:35,688 --> 00:02:37,565 First I want to thank manhunt.net 32 00:02:37,724 --> 00:02:40,364 for sponsoring my wedding reception. 33 00:02:40,527 --> 00:02:42,302 Welcome! 34 00:02:44,597 --> 00:02:48,340 You know, my relatives wanted me to have a traditional ceremony. 35 00:02:48,801 --> 00:02:49,779 Hello?! 36 00:02:50,203 --> 00:02:51,273 You are my family! 37 00:02:51,437 --> 00:02:53,314 You've been with me through it all: 38 00:02:53,473 --> 00:02:57,922 Fat, thin. A horrible addiction to very expensive handbags. 39 00:02:58,278 --> 00:02:59,689 But now I've got Michael! 40 00:03:00,413 --> 00:03:01,824 Where's Michael? 41 00:03:02,682 --> 00:03:03,660 Where is my man? 42 00:03:03,950 --> 00:03:05,520 Give me back my man! 43 00:03:05,718 --> 00:03:07,720 Oh there you are! 44 00:03:08,488 --> 00:03:11,867 Many of you are thinking you're not gonna see me again after today. 45 00:03:12,225 --> 00:03:15,434 That I'm gonna disappear like all the fag hags of your youth. 46 00:03:16,362 --> 00:03:17,432 Well, you're rig ht 47 00:03:17,764 --> 00:03:21,405 Finally I found a man who loves me and my pussy. 48 00:03:22,502 --> 00:03:26,382 I said he loves my pussy! 49 00:03:26,539 --> 00:03:29,577 And he's gonna tear it apart behind that picket fence! 50 00:03:32,612 --> 00:03:33,818 We love you Audrey! 51 00:03:34,347 --> 00:03:35,587 Oh, I love you too 52 00:03:37,650 --> 00:03:41,462 You know I lasted as long as I could with my boys. 53 00:03:42,655 --> 00:03:45,499 Longer than any fag hag ever has. 54 00:03:46,759 --> 00:03:47,829 Well... 55 00:03:47,994 --> 00:03:49,871 Any except Violet. 56 00:03:50,396 --> 00:03:52,637 Toss the bouquet already! 57 00:03:52,799 --> 00:03:56,246 The bouquet is yours Violet, if I had one. 58 00:04:05,578 --> 00:04:07,615 He's working at the salon tonight. 59 00:04:07,780 --> 00:04:08,690 But you're still together? 60 00:04:08,848 --> 00:04:10,589 Of course. Darian's perfect. 61 00:04:10,750 --> 00:04:12,354 I actually think, I'm falling in love with... 62 00:04:12,518 --> 00:04:13,462 Apparently Dan's cock is so huge - 63 00:04:13,620 --> 00:04:14,792 that the only way to fit it in your mouth - 64 00:04:14,954 --> 00:04:16,763 is to suck it while it's still soft. 65 00:04:18,524 --> 00:04:19,662 Is that Beer Can Dan? 66 00:04:21,527 --> 00:04:22,505 Yeah. 67 00:04:23,029 --> 00:04:24,565 What about Darian? 68 00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:27,336 Oh, Darian and Luke have an understanding. 69 00:04:30,570 --> 00:04:31,844 Uh oh, cock-block. 70 00:04:35,275 --> 00:04:36,015 Deflected! 71 00:04:39,045 --> 00:04:40,422 Luke may have more experience... 72 00:04:40,580 --> 00:04:41,957 But his opponent is tenacious 73 00:04:42,315 --> 00:04:42,986 It's battle of the bottoms. 74 00:04:43,349 --> 00:04:44,987 And the biggest loser comes out on top! 75 00:04:45,818 --> 00:04:46,922 Hey beautiful! 76 00:04:47,487 --> 00:04:50,434 Hey Zeus, you beast! Look at ya. 77 00:04:50,623 --> 00:04:52,569 Oh, I love it when you tease me! 78 00:04:52,692 --> 00:04:54,638 So, I hear you and Luke are joining forces. 79 00:04:54,827 --> 00:04:56,932 Yes. God I love that guy. 80 00:04:57,297 --> 00:04:59,277 He gave me his whole email list he's getting sponsors 81 00:04:59,432 --> 00:05:00,934 Oh, your benefit is going to be off the hook. 82 00:05:01,401 --> 00:05:02,379 New ink? 83 00:05:02,535 --> 00:05:04,014 Yeah, check it out. 84 00:05:04,671 --> 00:05:07,345 Ten years HIV positive, still kicking. 85 00:05:07,774 --> 00:05:08,878 You don't have to brand yourself. 86 00:05:09,442 --> 00:05:11,683 I just want everyone to know there is life after: 87 00:05:11,978 --> 00:05:13,389 Well, I'll be with you in sickness 88 00:05:13,546 --> 00:05:14,923 and in health, count on it. 89 00:05:15,448 --> 00:05:16,392 I love you. 90 00:05:16,549 --> 00:05:17,459 Paparazzi! 91 00:05:17,617 --> 00:05:18,595 Next Magazine 92 00:05:18,718 --> 00:05:19,696 No more pictures! 93 00:05:19,819 --> 00:05:20,991 You'll ruin their reputation. 94 00:05:21,387 --> 00:05:22,889 I implore you, no photos! 95 00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:25,428 Really, no more pictures. 96 00:05:27,060 --> 00:05:28,664 I gotta go! See ya'! 97 00:05:28,828 --> 00:05:30,000 Alright, we better go too. 98 00:05:31,030 --> 00:05:31,804 Have a goodnight. 99 00:05:31,964 --> 00:05:32,874 Hey, you too! 100 00:05:48,915 --> 00:05:49,893 Dude! 101 00:05:50,049 --> 00:05:51,027 What's with the skirt? 102 00:05:52,618 --> 00:05:53,619 Violet? 103 00:05:54,821 --> 00:05:55,925 Hey, I'm almost done. 104 00:05:56,789 --> 00:05:58,393 I'm waiting behind the shrub. 105 00:05:58,725 --> 00:05:59,669 Ok. 106 00:05:59,826 --> 00:06:00,804 She's my roommate. 107 00:06:03,463 --> 00:06:05,465 Yeah, you know man that's a little weird actually. 108 00:06:05,631 --> 00:06:06,575 Is she watching us? 109 00:06:06,899 --> 00:06:07,843 She's harmless. 110 00:06:09,135 --> 00:06:10,773 Fag hags, Jesus! 111 00:06:10,937 --> 00:06:11,915 Hey! 112 00:06:12,438 --> 00:06:13,416 More respect. 113 00:06:14,407 --> 00:06:15,442 She's the last one. 114 00:06:34,961 --> 00:06:36,440 Welcome to Frisky Friends 115 00:06:36,596 --> 00:06:38,098 where singles unite! 116 00:06:38,464 --> 00:06:40,705 You have 3 new Frisky Friends! 117 00:06:43,002 --> 00:06:45,573 Salome, you sound just like my mother. 118 00:06:45,738 --> 00:06:47,046 Mather and I enjoy lung country drives... 119 00:06:47,407 --> 00:06:48,147 Message deleted. 120 00:06:48,674 --> 00:06:49,948 Next message. 121 00:06:50,143 --> 00:06:51,816 Hi Salome, I'm looking for a committed, 122 00:06:51,944 --> 00:06:53,582 lung term relationship with... 123 00:06:53,713 --> 00:06:56,091 Message deleted. Next message. 124 00:06:56,682 --> 00:06:57,660 It's mailman. 125 00:06:57,884 --> 00:07:00,990 I'm dying ta get in a hut session before we meet. 126 00:07:08,728 --> 00:07:09,832 Mn Mailman. 127 00:07:10,563 --> 00:07:11,541 It's Salome. 128 00:07:12,832 --> 00:07:14,038 Got a delivery for me? 129 00:07:14,467 --> 00:07:17,414 Another very big package. 130 00:07:17,770 --> 00:07:18,748 What are you wearing? 131 00:07:18,905 --> 00:07:21,078 Just two drops of Chanel Number 5. 132 00:07:29,215 --> 00:07:30,523 Still off today? 133 00:07:32,919 --> 00:07:33,897 You wanna chill? 134 00:07:39,792 --> 00:07:42,602 Let's go to Coney Island and ride the Cyclone. 135 00:07:43,930 --> 00:07:46,809 Yeah, let's do that. 136 00:07:56,175 --> 00:07:58,018 So, how was Audrey's reception? 137 00:07:58,244 --> 00:07:59,222 She was so happy. 138 00:08:00,513 --> 00:08:02,493 I wish you could have been there to see her face. 139 00:08:02,648 --> 00:08:04,628 That's the one drawback to owning my own business. 140 00:08:04,884 --> 00:08:05,988 Not much free time. 141 00:08:06,953 --> 00:08:08,125 I have my own business. 142 00:08:09,822 --> 00:08:12,996 I think there is a little more leeway with roving sex parties. 143 00:08:15,161 --> 00:08:16,139 I'm branching out. 144 00:08:16,596 --> 00:08:17,540 Can I use your salon for my 145 00:08:17,697 --> 00:08:19,802 �Lazy Tops and Power Bottoms� party? 146 00:08:20,066 --> 00:08:22,478 My host bailed after the police raid you know... 147 00:08:25,972 --> 00:08:26,950 What? 148 00:08:27,640 --> 00:08:28,846 You got hickeys again. 149 00:08:29,108 --> 00:08:30,052 Oh, don't! 150 00:08:30,209 --> 00:08:31,153 Who were you with last night? 151 00:08:32,211 --> 00:08:33,155 Clearly an amateur: 152 00:08:34,614 --> 00:08:36,218 Wait, let me get this right. 153 00:08:37,717 --> 00:08:40,527 You watched two people commit to one another; 154 00:08:41,153 --> 00:08:43,793 Hooked up with some random and then came crawling into bed with me? 155 00:08:44,724 --> 00:08:45,759 I took a shower first. 156 00:08:47,627 --> 00:08:48,765 Come on D! 157 00:08:49,061 --> 00:08:50,836 I got cock-matized 158 00:08:51,964 --> 00:08:53,102 So, why'd you come over? 159 00:08:53,799 --> 00:08:55,005 Because I wanted to sleep with you. 160 00:08:56,302 --> 00:08:57,872 But you had sex with somebody else. 161 00:08:58,070 --> 00:08:59,981 It's not the same thing. You know that. 162 00:09:00,273 --> 00:09:01,877 You are as bad as I am. 163 00:09:02,141 --> 00:09:02,915 Was. 164 00:09:03,175 --> 00:09:04,586 We met at a glory hole. 165 00:09:04,844 --> 00:09:05,982 I know where we met. 166 00:09:08,881 --> 00:09:10,189 I can't do this anymore. 167 00:09:12,852 --> 00:09:13,956 Wait a second... 168 00:09:14,120 --> 00:09:15,827 You can't do this anymore? 169 00:09:16,188 --> 00:09:17,997 Darian, we have an understanding. 170 00:09:18,157 --> 00:09:20,159 Well, I asked for a new understanding. 171 00:09:21,027 --> 00:09:23,166 If you can't give me that I can't do this anymore. 172 00:09:23,729 --> 00:09:26,141 Darian, come on. You know that I... 173 00:09:26,832 --> 00:09:27,833 You know I... 174 00:09:32,338 --> 00:09:34,284 You know the impalas? In Africa? 175 00:09:34,941 --> 00:09:37,251 Did you know they have like twenty sexual partners at a go? 176 00:09:37,677 --> 00:09:40,658 And what's amazing is that not one impala gets upset or angry 177 00:09:40,780 --> 00:09:42,157 or says they can't do it anymore. 178 00:09:43,583 --> 00:09:44,561 You're right! 179 00:09:45,885 --> 00:09:46,863 I'm gonna take a shower 180 00:09:47,253 --> 00:09:50,700 When I'm out, I wanna find you gone, my keys on the table 181 00:09:50,856 --> 00:09:52,961 and I don't want you coming around here anymore. 182 00:09:53,993 --> 00:09:54,937 It's over! 183 00:10:00,766 --> 00:10:02,006 But I love you. 184 00:10:03,235 --> 00:10:04,737 Hi, do you have a minute for future today? 185 00:10:10,710 --> 00:10:12,053 Hi sir do you have a minute for the future today? 186 00:10:12,211 --> 00:10:13,656 Sorry, nope. I'm not breeding. 187 00:10:19,752 --> 00:10:20,924 Are you my mailman? 188 00:10:21,754 --> 00:10:22,698 Cute socks! 189 00:10:22,855 --> 00:10:24,334 Salome? That's you. 190 00:10:24,724 --> 00:10:26,829 My gay husband would kill for those calves! 191 00:10:26,993 --> 00:10:28,199 Please. We're in public. 192 00:10:28,361 --> 00:10:29,237 Oh honey its New York- 193 00:10:29,395 --> 00:10:30,339 Everything happens on the street. 194 00:10:30,963 --> 00:10:32,237 So, Chinese is okay, rig ht? 195 00:10:32,365 --> 00:10:33,309 I can't do it. 196 00:10:34,367 --> 00:10:36,870 I once had the worse gas off a plate of mu shu pork. 197 00:10:37,036 --> 00:10:37,912 I get it, where should we go? 198 00:10:38,070 --> 00:10:39,811 No, I can't do this. 199 00:10:40,773 --> 00:10:41,751 I'm gonna take a pass. 200 00:10:43,743 --> 00:10:44,847 You're gonna pass? 201 00:10:45,678 --> 00:10:47,919 I know I lied on Frisky Friends but I came clean 202 00:10:48,080 --> 00:10:49,320 I mean, I gave you my real stats. 203 00:10:49,682 --> 00:10:50,626 Salome 204 00:10:50,783 --> 00:10:51,955 I know this sounds clich� but 205 00:10:52,752 --> 00:10:53,730 It's not you... 206 00:10:54,120 --> 00:10:54,962 It's me. 207 00:10:55,121 --> 00:10:55,963 Really. 208 00:11:02,194 --> 00:11:03,138 These were for you. 209 00:11:17,076 --> 00:11:18,146 But I have experience. 210 00:11:18,310 --> 00:11:20,187 I have walked the catwalks in Paris, Milan, 211 00:11:20,346 --> 00:11:21,882 London! 212 00:11:22,048 --> 00:11:23,994 In nothing but pasties. 213 00:11:24,116 --> 00:11:25,060 Here, see? 214 00:11:25,217 --> 00:11:27,163 My collection is designer clothing. 215 00:11:27,353 --> 00:11:29,333 They were designer pasties. 216 00:11:30,022 --> 00:11:32,400 Bradleigh, please I need press, help me! 217 00:11:32,758 --> 00:11:33,429 Please. 218 00:11:33,793 --> 00:11:35,795 For the passion we shared when we were boys? 219 00:11:37,897 --> 00:11:39,843 Larice, are you threatening me? 220 00:11:42,134 --> 00:11:43,238 Yes. 221 00:11:45,805 --> 00:11:47,250 So, you've seen the line sheet. 222 00:11:48,107 --> 00:11:49,177 Bradleigh's new collection was inspired by 223 00:11:49,341 --> 00:11:51,753 the latest dinosaur discovered down in Argentina. 224 00:11:52,912 --> 00:11:54,949 Perfect! Let me know when you want to come for the pull. 225 00:11:56,382 --> 00:11:57,326 Okay. 226 00:12:01,253 --> 00:12:02,254 Oh no, not again! 227 00:12:02,421 --> 00:12:04,230 What is wrong with me, Riley? 228 00:12:04,390 --> 00:12:05,334 Why do you keep saying that? 229 00:12:05,825 --> 00:12:06,735 Nothing! 230 00:12:06,892 --> 00:12:07,836 It's not you, it's him. 231 00:12:09,228 --> 00:12:12,766 You are surrounded by men who love you. 232 00:12:13,466 --> 00:12:14,444 Love? 233 00:12:15,034 --> 00:12:17,708 I deserve someone to love me and my pussy 234 00:12:17,870 --> 00:12:18,814 Like Audrey. 235 00:12:19,338 --> 00:12:20,316 Do you hear me? 236 00:12:20,773 --> 00:12:21,843 Um, I hear you. 237 00:12:23,175 --> 00:12:24,313 Donna I would, if I could. 238 00:12:24,477 --> 00:12:25,217 I've got tools. 239 00:12:25,377 --> 00:12:26,253 Not now, Donna. 240 00:12:26,412 --> 00:12:27,356 Still got my hymen. 241 00:12:31,484 --> 00:12:34,397 What you need, Violet, is the male version of you. 242 00:12:35,187 --> 00:12:36,188 A fag stag. 243 00:12:36,355 --> 00:12:37,231 A metrosexual? 244 00:12:37,389 --> 00:12:38,197 No, no no no no 245 00:12:38,357 --> 00:12:40,303 A metrosexual will only throw you off the scent 246 00:12:40,459 --> 00:12:41,403 What is it Salome? 247 00:12:41,794 --> 00:12:42,738 I'm going to lunch. 248 00:12:43,763 --> 00:12:44,741 Actually, not lunch. 249 00:12:44,897 --> 00:12:46,342 I'm being taken out for high-end water: 250 00:12:47,133 --> 00:12:48,874 Can Violet cover reception? 251 00:12:49,301 --> 00:12:50,279 One sec.. 252 00:12:50,436 --> 00:12:51,915 A fag stag is special. 253 00:12:52,071 --> 00:12:53,379 He hangs out with gays because 254 00:12:53,539 --> 00:12:56,145 he enjoys their energy and their attention just like you do. 255 00:12:56,542 --> 00:12:58,522 Does that sort of person really exist? 256 00:13:00,045 --> 00:13:01,023 I don't think so. 257 00:13:05,217 --> 00:13:06,287 Can I have a carrot? 258 00:13:07,787 --> 00:13:08,765 Nevermind. 259 00:13:09,054 --> 00:13:09,998 I probably shouldn't. 260 00:13:22,802 --> 00:13:24,247 My fuck buddy broke up with me. 261 00:13:24,436 --> 00:13:25,915 Oh, no! 262 00:13:26,405 --> 00:13:27,440 Really glad I never officially moved in 263 00:13:27,573 --> 00:13:29,553 because then I'm not officially kicked out rig ht? 264 00:13:29,909 --> 00:13:31,889 Sweetheart what happened? 265 00:13:32,178 --> 00:13:35,284 Suddenly after three months Darian is not a slut anymore. 266 00:13:36,282 --> 00:13:37,920 What does he want? Monogamy? 267 00:13:38,417 --> 00:13:40,795 Sounds like something I need lasered off. 268 00:13:40,953 --> 00:13:42,091 I know. 269 00:13:42,588 --> 00:13:43,999 Oh my gosh, Luke. 270 00:13:44,123 --> 00:13:45,363 I think it might be time for us... 271 00:13:45,524 --> 00:13:47,003 Please, don't say it. 272 00:13:47,927 --> 00:13:48,871 Grow up. 273 00:13:49,028 --> 00:13:50,336 I can hear that from anyone but you. 274 00:13:51,330 --> 00:13:52,502 But, maybe it's time. 275 00:13:53,966 --> 00:13:55,411 I don't see what the problem is? 276 00:13:55,568 --> 00:13:57,809 So I play around what's that got to do with Darian? 277 00:13:57,970 --> 00:13:59,540 But, you know I would give my heart 278 00:13:59,905 --> 00:14:01,407 A lung, and what's left of my liver 279 00:14:02,508 --> 00:14:04,078 to have a chance with a man like Darian. 280 00:14:04,577 --> 00:14:06,022 I mean, do you know how lucky you are? 281 00:14:06,846 --> 00:14:07,984 Can I tell you what happened to me? 282 00:14:08,447 --> 00:14:10,427 I met a frisky friend for lunch today. 283 00:14:13,085 --> 00:14:15,224 And he can't put up with me for two minutes 284 00:14:15,521 --> 00:14:18,229 I mean, leaves me on the street, can you believe it? 285 00:14:18,991 --> 00:14:20,868 I'm not even worth a lousy lunch. 286 00:14:21,427 --> 00:14:22,428 Which frisky friend? 287 00:14:23,162 --> 00:14:24,436 What's his name and where does he live? 288 00:14:25,164 --> 00:14:26,336 Why, what are you going to do? 289 00:14:26,932 --> 00:14:28,138 Beat him up. 290 00:14:29,501 --> 00:14:31,344 Not only a mailman, but a Gemini. 291 00:14:31,637 --> 00:14:32,911 Have you known me to stoop that low? 292 00:14:33,072 --> 00:14:34,016 A Gemini! 293 00:14:34,173 --> 00:14:35,311 Yeah, you dodged a bullet on that one. 294 00:14:35,474 --> 00:14:36,509 And he was probably bi-polar: 295 00:14:36,876 --> 00:14:37,581 All Geminis are bi-polar: 296 00:14:37,943 --> 00:14:38,978 Hi baby! 297 00:14:41,213 --> 00:14:42,191 Good to see you. 298 00:14:42,481 --> 00:14:44,256 Look at that ass in those jeans. 299 00:14:44,550 --> 00:14:45,995 - Thank you. - Scorching! 300 00:14:46,252 --> 00:14:47,162 I have spammed my whole list. 301 00:14:47,319 --> 00:14:49,321 Every last queen is going to be at that benefit. 302 00:14:49,922 --> 00:14:50,900 What about our queen mother? 303 00:14:51,056 --> 00:14:52,433 Of course! I've already poached some 304 00:14:52,558 --> 00:14:54,902 last season Bradleigh for the silent auction. 305 00:14:55,127 --> 00:14:58,006 There is nothing I wouldn't do to keep HIV stigma-free! 306 00:14:58,297 --> 00:15:00,868 You should throw her on stage to revive her high school tap routine. 307 00:15:01,066 --> 00:15:02,636 I do a mean Shim-Sham-Shimmy. 308 00:15:03,002 --> 00:15:03,946 Oh really? 309 00:15:04,103 --> 00:15:05,104 Let's see those moves baby. 310 00:15:05,271 --> 00:15:08,013 Oh, no one wants to see my moves, when we can ogle yours. 311 00:15:08,173 --> 00:15:09,117 Oh, that's not fail: 312 00:15:09,275 --> 00:15:10,948 No, it's not fair at all! 313 00:15:13,479 --> 00:15:14,423 Okay... 314 00:15:14,580 --> 00:15:15,957 next time I get dumped in the real world 315 00:15:16,081 --> 00:15:18,527 it's going to be by someone hot like Zeus, 316 00:15:18,684 --> 00:15:20,425 Not some bi-polar mailman. 317 00:15:20,586 --> 00:15:21,496 Tell it, girl. 318 00:15:21,654 --> 00:15:24,134 Why, oh why, can't I find a straight man? 319 00:15:24,256 --> 00:15:25,234 Why can't I? 320 00:15:25,391 --> 00:15:26,893 Why don't you try a straight bar? 321 00:15:27,059 --> 00:15:28,037 Who'll go with me? 322 00:15:30,562 --> 00:15:32,007 Yeah, that's what I'm saying! 323 00:15:32,631 --> 00:15:34,008 Okay, you don't need to go anywhere 324 00:15:34,366 --> 00:15:36,972 We will find you a fag stag. 325 00:15:37,136 --> 00:15:38,774 Riley's convinced that I'll find a straight man 326 00:15:38,971 --> 00:15:40,382 masquerading around the gay world. 327 00:15:40,673 --> 00:15:42,346 Actually, a fag stag is urban legend. 328 00:15:42,508 --> 00:15:45,921 Okay, well you have about an hour to find this mythical unicorn 329 00:15:46,078 --> 00:15:48,149 before mama goes home for phone sex. 330 00:15:48,314 --> 00:15:49,292 She is not lying. 331 00:15:49,715 --> 00:15:50,693 You know maybe Frisky Friends 332 00:15:51,050 --> 00:15:52,961 is not the best way to meet a man. 333 00:15:53,118 --> 00:15:54,119 It's a numbers game Markus 334 00:15:54,253 --> 00:15:55,459 It's a numbers game 335 00:15:55,621 --> 00:15:57,396 I'm just saying no more Geminis. 336 00:15:57,523 --> 00:15:58,467 How about the internet? 337 00:15:58,624 --> 00:16:01,036 I talk better that I type baby! 338 00:16:01,160 --> 00:16:02,138 Uh Oh, here comes the fuck me voice 339 00:16:02,294 --> 00:16:03,204 Look out! 340 00:16:03,362 --> 00:16:04,636 Oh that feels so good 341 00:16:04,964 --> 00:16:06,238 I love it on the right side of my... 342 00:16:06,398 --> 00:16:07,342 Tuna juice! 343 00:16:07,666 --> 00:16:08,974 Enough about your gash wound. 344 00:16:09,134 --> 00:16:10,044 Thank you. 345 00:16:10,202 --> 00:16:11,408 Stop calling my pussy a gash wound! 346 00:16:11,570 --> 00:16:13,345 - Okay. - Hey guys 347 00:16:13,505 --> 00:16:14,677 He?! What's going on? 348 00:16:15,040 --> 00:16:16,519 - Hello Goddess! - Hey sweetie. 349 00:16:16,675 --> 00:16:18,313 - So good to see you. - You too. 350 00:16:18,477 --> 00:16:19,353 You guys have fun tonight. 351 00:16:19,511 --> 00:16:20,387 Thank you. 352 00:16:20,546 --> 00:16:21,422 Remember when Peter and Derek were 353 00:16:21,580 --> 00:16:23,423 looking for a surrogate for their gayby? 354 00:16:23,582 --> 00:16:24,652 You know they asked Violet, rig ht? 355 00:16:25,017 --> 00:16:25,961 I'm like, HELLO!! 356 00:16:26,118 --> 00:16:27,188 Entrance only, and still they pleaded. 357 00:16:27,353 --> 00:16:28,263 I'm like find another womb! 358 00:16:28,420 --> 00:16:29,455 How hard can it be? 359 00:16:29,621 --> 00:16:30,622 Seriously half the world has one! 360 00:16:30,990 --> 00:16:32,663 Who did they find? Derek's sister: 361 00:16:33,359 --> 00:16:35,236 I understand it's someone else's egg 362 00:16:35,394 --> 00:16:36,532 She's just a surrogate but... 363 00:16:36,695 --> 00:16:38,333 Don't you think it can catch 364 00:16:38,497 --> 00:16:40,636 I don't know, incest by osmosis? 365 00:16:41,033 --> 00:16:42,307 That's beautiful. 366 00:16:42,468 --> 00:16:44,971 What a beautiful gift of love from Derek's sister. 367 00:16:47,272 --> 00:16:48,751 It's not as if Derek could fall pregnant. 368 00:16:49,108 --> 00:16:50,519 Well, he's been trying for years. 369 00:16:51,210 --> 00:16:53,520 Markus' new novel, actually, is about a man who gives birth. 370 00:16:54,546 --> 00:16:56,753 Well it's about how life would be different if men could give birth. 371 00:16:57,116 --> 00:16:57,992 Well, I'll tell you. 372 00:16:58,150 --> 00:16:59,288 Abortion clinics on every corner! 373 00:17:00,185 --> 00:17:01,163 Oh, hold on! 374 00:17:01,286 --> 00:17:02,629 Here comes the coat hanger again. 375 00:17:03,088 --> 00:17:04,362 I'm sorry, your balls are in the way. 376 00:17:07,659 --> 00:17:08,569 That's not funny! 377 00:17:08,727 --> 00:17:09,671 That's not funny at all! 378 00:17:10,095 --> 00:17:12,006 Your color is fantastic. 379 00:17:12,164 --> 00:17:13,074 Who does it? 380 00:17:13,232 --> 00:17:14,176 I was �Done by Darian�. 381 00:17:15,567 --> 00:17:16,545 Who hasn't been? 382 00:17:22,374 --> 00:17:23,318 Darian... 383 00:17:23,475 --> 00:17:24,419 Yeah 384 00:17:24,576 --> 00:17:26,556 Are you still going to donate your coupon 385 00:17:26,712 --> 00:17:28,191 for the silent auction Zeus is doing? 386 00:17:28,347 --> 00:17:29,291 Of course. 387 00:17:29,448 --> 00:17:30,552 I also got couple of things for you. 388 00:17:30,716 --> 00:17:32,161 Stop by the salon alright? 389 00:17:32,317 --> 00:17:33,261 I will. 390 00:17:36,822 --> 00:17:39,029 How about the hottie right over there? 391 00:17:43,128 --> 00:17:44,334 YOU are SO mean to me. 392 00:17:44,496 --> 00:17:45,338 Wait, who's that? 393 00:17:45,497 --> 00:17:46,771 Riley says that's my fag stag. 394 00:17:47,132 --> 00:17:47,906 Unicorn 395 00:17:48,067 --> 00:17:49,011 Sweet, thanks! 396 00:17:49,334 --> 00:17:50,312 Cheers! Drinks on me. 397 00:18:05,084 --> 00:18:06,324 Oh my God. 398 00:18:09,088 --> 00:18:10,999 Salome. OH MY GOD! 399 00:18:11,590 --> 00:18:13,160 Are you dead? 400 00:18:13,659 --> 00:18:15,297 What happened to you? 401 00:18:15,761 --> 00:18:19,106 You look...Amazing. 402 00:18:21,200 --> 00:18:22,144 Feed me! 403 00:18:34,680 --> 00:18:37,490 Promise me you won't tell anyone you found me behind a dumpster: 404 00:18:37,616 --> 00:18:38,356 Okay? 405 00:18:38,517 --> 00:18:39,495 Alright. 406 00:18:40,519 --> 00:18:41,725 I am really worried. 407 00:18:41,887 --> 00:18:44,299 When I don't eat, I get sleepy, okay? 408 00:18:44,523 --> 00:18:46,469 Salome, you're naturally thin. 409 00:18:46,892 --> 00:18:48,530 If I was you, I'd only be eating 410 00:18:48,827 --> 00:18:49,805 And fucking. 411 00:18:51,230 --> 00:18:53,676 Violet, let me tell you something: 412 00:18:53,832 --> 00:18:55,243 Fucking is overrated. 413 00:18:55,567 --> 00:18:57,376 Guys line up around the block to fuck me. 414 00:18:57,536 --> 00:18:59,675 It is really tiresome. 415 00:19:00,305 --> 00:19:02,842 There is a guy right here in this diner that wants to fuck me. 416 00:19:03,408 --> 00:19:04,751 Who? 417 00:19:05,344 --> 00:19:08,223 Black guy, Oscar Giovanni scarf, biceps. 418 00:19:08,714 --> 00:19:10,284 He's behind you. 419 00:19:10,449 --> 00:19:12,053 He doesn't know that he should know 420 00:19:12,251 --> 00:19:14,253 that l know he's cruising me, you know? 421 00:19:15,754 --> 00:19:16,732 Wait. 422 00:19:17,623 --> 00:19:19,227 He's actually cruising you. 423 00:19:19,391 --> 00:19:20,301 Oh my god! 424 00:19:20,459 --> 00:19:21,733 Just play aloof. 425 00:19:28,167 --> 00:19:28,907 Violet! 426 00:19:29,268 --> 00:19:30,440 Stop with the straw. 427 00:19:34,940 --> 00:19:36,180 You lost him. 428 00:19:36,308 --> 00:19:38,811 And you're gonna keep losing them until you get off your racket. 429 00:19:39,678 --> 00:19:40,622 My racket? 430 00:19:40,779 --> 00:19:42,850 Your racket is what's stopping you. 431 00:19:43,515 --> 00:19:44,721 Well, I don't look like you. 432 00:19:45,717 --> 00:19:47,628 It's not just your looks. 433 00:19:48,220 --> 00:19:49,460 There is someone for everyone. 434 00:19:49,588 --> 00:19:50,862 I believe that. 435 00:19:52,491 --> 00:19:53,469 Thanks. 436 00:19:53,892 --> 00:19:55,496 Let me ask you something. 437 00:19:55,727 --> 00:19:56,797 Where were you earlier? 438 00:19:56,962 --> 00:19:57,872 Out with the boys. 439 00:19:58,230 --> 00:19:59,174 Okay. 440 00:19:59,298 --> 00:20:01,300 Do you know that story in the news about 441 00:20:01,433 --> 00:20:04,744 the family of peacocks that took in the orphan elephant? 442 00:20:04,903 --> 00:20:05,904 Oh, yes. 443 00:20:06,238 --> 00:20:08,775 And then the elephant ran around thinking it was a peacock? 444 00:20:08,941 --> 00:20:11,319 So sweet. 445 00:20:11,476 --> 00:20:12,750 It's not sweet. 446 00:20:12,878 --> 00:20:14,357 It's ridiculous. 447 00:20:14,513 --> 00:20:15,423 Picture it! 448 00:20:15,581 --> 00:20:17,424 Violet, you are not a peacock! 449 00:20:17,583 --> 00:20:18,527 You are an... 450 00:20:21,920 --> 00:20:22,898 Have you ever thought maybe 451 00:20:23,255 --> 00:20:25,735 your gay friends just don't wanna share you? 452 00:20:26,458 --> 00:20:27,436 No. 453 00:20:27,559 --> 00:20:29,596 They wanna keep you wrapped up in their own little world 454 00:20:29,761 --> 00:20:31,365 away from men who want women. 455 00:20:31,530 --> 00:20:33,441 That's a horrible thing to say. 456 00:20:33,599 --> 00:20:34,805 Do you wanna get married and have kids? 457 00:20:35,634 --> 00:20:36,669 No. 458 00:20:36,868 --> 00:20:37,846 See? 459 00:20:37,970 --> 00:20:40,507 The gays have totally warped your mind. 460 00:20:43,742 --> 00:20:45,779 They do refuse to go to straight bars. 461 00:20:47,312 --> 00:20:49,519 And they are always insulting my pussy. 462 00:20:50,482 --> 00:20:52,519 But no, my friends want what I want. 463 00:20:55,454 --> 00:20:56,432 Okay. 464 00:20:57,589 --> 00:20:58,567 Okay what? 465 00:20:59,524 --> 00:21:01,003 You're not willing to be coachable. 466 00:21:01,326 --> 00:21:02,236 I am! 467 00:21:02,394 --> 00:21:03,395 I am coachable. 468 00:21:04,663 --> 00:21:05,641 Then I can help. 469 00:21:08,934 --> 00:21:09,912 God... 470 00:21:10,702 --> 00:21:11,806 I ate so much. 471 00:21:15,907 --> 00:21:17,614 I'm just gonna hit the ladies' room. 472 00:21:21,413 --> 00:21:23,620 I might be a minute... 473 00:21:23,882 --> 00:21:24,724 or two. 474 00:21:32,691 --> 00:21:33,635 Just pick a number: 475 00:21:33,792 --> 00:21:35,271 10,000 words a day. 476 00:21:35,861 --> 00:21:36,839 I wish... 477 00:21:36,995 --> 00:21:38,565 it's just that... you know 478 00:21:38,730 --> 00:21:40,869 their baby is born and I've lost the plot 479 00:21:42,701 --> 00:21:45,978 Maybe male mothers eat their young. 480 00:21:46,471 --> 00:21:48,382 Thanks, that's very helpful. 481 00:21:50,942 --> 00:21:52,444 Baby! 482 00:21:53,011 --> 00:21:54,319 Gays don't breed. 483 00:21:54,479 --> 00:21:56,686 It's what separates us from the animals. 484 00:21:57,549 --> 00:22:00,359 We should invest in valuable real estate instead. 485 00:22:00,552 --> 00:22:01,496 Let's do that... 486 00:22:01,653 --> 00:22:03,633 How about that rooftop at Audrey's reception? 487 00:22:03,789 --> 00:22:04,699 How about... 488 00:22:04,823 --> 00:22:06,825 this valuable real estate, ha? Right here... 489 00:22:07,392 --> 00:22:08,871 It's looking a bit neglected. 490 00:22:09,027 --> 00:22:10,005 Seriously... 491 00:22:10,362 --> 00:22:11,306 we're not breeders. 492 00:22:11,463 --> 00:22:12,999 We don't have to worry about the rest of the planet. 493 00:22:13,365 --> 00:22:14,844 Global warming, recycling... 494 00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:16,843 Oh, I would hate to recycle! 495 00:22:17,669 --> 00:22:19,012 So why not write about that? 496 00:22:19,338 --> 00:22:20,942 Because I'm writing a fantasy, Riley. 497 00:22:21,106 --> 00:22:22,676 Your husband is an idealist. 498 00:22:24,609 --> 00:22:27,590 Doll, I love you... 499 00:22:28,013 --> 00:22:29,014 but I'm not your husband. 500 00:22:31,650 --> 00:22:32,594 It's their word. 501 00:22:32,751 --> 00:22:33,695 It could be our word. 502 00:22:37,923 --> 00:22:39,698 Pear puree? 503 00:22:39,958 --> 00:22:40,936 What's this? 504 00:22:41,593 --> 00:22:43,038 Just research... 505 00:22:44,763 --> 00:22:45,707 okaY--- 506 00:22:46,365 --> 00:22:47,400 I've got an idea... 507 00:22:48,133 --> 00:22:50,613 I wanna take you out tomorrow night for some solid food. 508 00:22:52,070 --> 00:22:53,071 Cheer you up. 509 00:22:56,408 --> 00:22:57,478 I love you. 510 00:22:58,009 --> 00:22:59,545 I love my husband! 511 00:23:00,679 --> 00:23:01,749 I love you 512 00:23:01,913 --> 00:23:03,586 I love my husband! 513 00:23:04,683 --> 00:23:05,753 I love you 514 00:23:06,518 --> 00:23:07,895 Ah... husband 515 00:23:09,721 --> 00:23:11,064 Just found this at the flea market! 516 00:23:11,456 --> 00:23:12,799 What do you think? 517 00:23:12,924 --> 00:23:13,868 Cute, ha? 518 00:23:14,393 --> 00:23:15,133 You can drape it 519 00:23:15,494 --> 00:23:17,565 you can belt it, you can crimp it! 520 00:23:17,729 --> 00:23:19,731 You can knock it off in China for 50 cents a pop. 521 00:23:19,898 --> 00:23:20,842 Precisely. 522 00:23:21,600 --> 00:23:22,704 Make that happen. 523 00:23:25,070 --> 00:23:28,074 Remind me to give this splendor to Donna when she gets back. 524 00:23:30,709 --> 00:23:31,653 Oh hey! 525 00:23:31,810 --> 00:23:32,754 Drinks tonight? 526 00:23:33,044 --> 00:23:33,988 Markus has writers' group. 527 00:23:35,046 --> 00:23:36,024 I have a dinner date tonight 528 00:23:36,148 --> 00:23:37,786 and I don't plan on coming home after: 529 00:23:37,949 --> 00:23:39,087 Not another frisky friend? 530 00:23:39,451 --> 00:23:42,159 Why do you say it like that "another frisky friend"? 531 00:23:42,954 --> 00:23:45,093 What, do you want me all to yourself? Or what?!? 532 00:23:48,059 --> 00:23:49,504 Wow! 533 00:23:49,961 --> 00:23:52,407 It's about a "day of beauty" coupon for a silent auction I'm doing 534 00:23:52,564 --> 00:23:54,009 I just gave it to you. 535 00:23:54,166 --> 00:23:55,076 Okay, thanks 536 00:23:55,434 --> 00:23:57,414 I actually wanted to speak with Darian about another matter'... 537 00:23:57,569 --> 00:23:59,048 I already told you Darian is with a client. 538 00:24:00,972 --> 00:24:02,645 Hey yo! Darian, hey! 539 00:24:04,109 --> 00:24:06,419 Am I invisible? 540 00:24:06,578 --> 00:24:07,522 Yeah, to me. 541 00:24:07,646 --> 00:24:09,091 Darian listen, is now a bad time? 542 00:24:09,448 --> 00:24:10,153 Now is good. 543 00:24:10,515 --> 00:24:12,552 Okay, thanks so much for this coupon 544 00:24:12,984 --> 00:24:16,488 Can we speak in private? 545 00:24:16,988 --> 00:24:18,831 Since when do you care about private? 546 00:24:19,825 --> 00:24:20,769 Okay. 547 00:24:21,159 --> 00:24:22,137 Well D 548 00:24:22,494 --> 00:24:23,598 I wanna invite you to a nice dinner or... 549 00:24:23,762 --> 00:24:25,673 something romantic of your choice. 550 00:24:26,698 --> 00:24:28,041 Um.. why? 551 00:24:28,633 --> 00:24:29,976 Well, you know that story in the book 552 00:24:30,135 --> 00:24:32,046 with Noah and ...animals and 553 00:24:32,204 --> 00:24:33,706 Wait, wait, wait.. Noah's Ark? 554 00:24:33,872 --> 00:24:36,148 And a bird brought Noah a twig 555 00:24:36,475 --> 00:24:37,886 which meant everything is gonna be okay. 556 00:24:38,910 --> 00:24:40,719 So, you're here as... 557 00:24:40,879 --> 00:24:42,153 as a twig? 558 00:24:44,149 --> 00:24:45,059 I'm here to show you just how much 559 00:24:45,217 --> 00:24:47,026 I want everything to be okay for us. 560 00:24:47,953 --> 00:24:52,595 Wow! Luke... thank you... 561 00:24:53,792 --> 00:24:55,794 for that rare glimpse of sincerity. 562 00:25:02,234 --> 00:25:03,872 And thank you for stopping by... 563 00:25:06,505 --> 00:25:07,506 But this is... 564 00:25:07,639 --> 00:25:10,119 The rest of your stuff.. from my apartment. 565 00:25:26,157 --> 00:25:28,034 Don't... don't cry 566 00:25:29,060 --> 00:25:31,040 You know you like that one... aah come on! 567 00:25:35,000 --> 00:25:36,104 Goad buy! 568 00:25:38,803 --> 00:25:42,216 Put it on there now.. no, on top of it, ok? 569 00:25:42,941 --> 00:25:43,942 Put it on there. 570 00:25:48,580 --> 00:25:50,651 Little person. 571 00:25:52,150 --> 00:25:55,688 Um... this is Joey. 572 00:25:55,854 --> 00:25:56,924 Say hi Joey 573 00:25:57,255 --> 00:25:58,199 Hey! 574 00:25:58,557 --> 00:26:00,059 Ashley's sitter called in sick... 575 00:26:00,225 --> 00:26:01,533 Ashley? 576 00:26:01,826 --> 00:26:03,703 My mentor from writers group 577 00:26:04,062 --> 00:26:06,702 And how often does Ashley's sitter call in sick? 578 00:26:07,198 --> 00:26:10,668 Oh... um.. just Fridays... 579 00:26:10,835 --> 00:26:12,815 sometimes Wednesdays. 580 00:26:14,339 --> 00:26:15,317 You couldn't tell me? 581 00:26:15,640 --> 00:26:16,744 You know, sometimes you're not that easy 582 00:26:16,908 --> 00:26:18,546 to talk to about certain things. 583 00:26:18,710 --> 00:26:20,553 Not that easy to talk to... 584 00:26:20,912 --> 00:26:21,913 Ashley's just running late.. 585 00:26:22,080 --> 00:26:23,218 She'll be here any minute. 586 00:26:24,316 --> 00:26:26,796 Markus I just want what's best for us. 587 00:26:26,952 --> 00:26:30,024 You know, to move up, get ahead, own some property. 588 00:26:30,155 --> 00:26:32,692 You know this gig can help us save. 589 00:26:32,924 --> 00:26:34,961 Ashley set me up baby sitting for others too. 590 00:26:36,027 --> 00:26:37,734 Yeah, she's done wonders for your writing.. 591 00:26:38,363 --> 00:26:41,173 I'm really good with kids, okay? 592 00:26:41,366 --> 00:26:42,845 Just look at Joey... 593 00:26:43,835 --> 00:26:45,678 Isn't he adorable? Just look at him. 594 00:26:53,211 --> 00:26:55,157 Oh, Joey...baby 595 00:26:55,914 --> 00:26:58,656 Welcome to the �Lazy Tops, Power Bottoms� party. 596 00:26:58,917 --> 00:26:59,895 Show me your dick. 597 00:27:00,151 --> 00:27:02,631 I've just got to make sure you're not the police. 598 00:27:05,657 --> 00:27:07,159 Here's a bag for your clothes. 599 00:27:08,259 --> 00:27:09,636 Welcome to the �Lazy Tops, 600 00:27:09,794 --> 00:27:11,899 Power Bottoms� party. $40 please. 601 00:27:12,330 --> 00:27:13,707 I'm on the list 602 00:27:18,036 --> 00:27:19,174 Okay, what are you doing here? 603 00:27:19,804 --> 00:27:22,114 I came to fuck my brains out. 604 00:27:22,273 --> 00:27:24,947 Um.. in front of all these people? 605 00:27:25,377 --> 00:27:27,357 With all these people. 606 00:27:27,879 --> 00:27:29,381 Okay, what the hell is going on here? 607 00:27:29,814 --> 00:27:31,725 You're deliberately trying to hurt me? 608 00:27:33,018 --> 00:27:35,624 Take it easy, Luke... 609 00:27:36,321 --> 00:27:38,892 Haven't you heard about the impalas in Africa? 610 00:27:43,928 --> 00:27:44,872 Hey sweetie! 611 00:27:45,196 --> 00:27:46,368 Hi! 612 00:27:46,765 --> 00:27:47,675 Frisky friend 265, Mike. 613 00:27:47,832 --> 00:27:48,776 Hey! 614 00:27:49,067 --> 00:27:51,069 Donnie and I worked together as flight attendants 615 00:27:51,236 --> 00:27:52,146 Air hostesses! 616 00:27:52,303 --> 00:27:53,247 Oh, yes. 617 00:27:53,371 --> 00:27:55,078 In the unlikely event of a water landing, 618 00:27:55,240 --> 00:27:57,015 you're all gonna die! 619 00:27:57,175 --> 00:27:58,119 That's nice! 620 00:27:58,243 --> 00:27:59,153 Thank you 621 00:27:59,310 --> 00:28:00,755 I'll be back to get your orders in a bit. 622 00:28:00,912 --> 00:28:01,856 Okay. 623 00:28:02,080 --> 00:28:03,184 Air hostess, ha? 624 00:28:03,448 --> 00:28:05,052 Oh, my ticket out of Idaho. 625 00:28:06,017 --> 00:28:07,018 I got some buddies out West... 626 00:28:07,185 --> 00:28:08,289 That's beautiful country. 627 00:28:08,420 --> 00:28:10,093 Uh, beautiful yeah, but... 628 00:28:10,255 --> 00:28:12,235 all anyone wants for you is the same old stuff... 629 00:28:12,390 --> 00:28:13,334 you know, get married, have kids. 630 00:28:13,458 --> 00:28:14,664 I want something different, you know. 631 00:28:14,826 --> 00:28:15,964 Yeah, I hear you. 632 00:28:16,695 --> 00:28:17,400 Yeah? 633 00:28:17,762 --> 00:28:19,070 Yeah, we're an island of misfits. 634 00:28:19,230 --> 00:28:20,140 I actually moved here to be around 635 00:28:20,298 --> 00:28:22,209 more open-minded women. 636 00:28:24,903 --> 00:28:26,439 You still in the friendly skies? 637 00:28:26,805 --> 00:28:28,284 No, I had to give it up. 638 00:28:28,473 --> 00:28:29,713 Oh, after 9/11? 639 00:28:29,874 --> 00:28:30,784 Oh, no! 640 00:28:30,942 --> 00:28:32,785 I just kept ballooning up on the plane food 641 00:28:33,378 --> 00:28:34,322 No way. 642 00:28:34,479 --> 00:28:35,753 Oh, yes way. I mean Donnie... 643 00:28:35,914 --> 00:28:37,291 Donnie used to have a 29 inch waist 644 00:28:37,782 --> 00:28:39,193 I mean, I lost most of what I put on, 645 00:28:39,350 --> 00:28:41,057 I mean, except for my fupa... 646 00:28:41,219 --> 00:28:42,163 but I'm fine with it. 647 00:28:42,353 --> 00:28:44,697 Umm, with what? 648 00:28:45,223 --> 00:28:46,031 Fupa. 649 00:28:46,291 --> 00:28:47,395 Fat Upper Pussy Area. 650 00:28:48,393 --> 00:28:51,033 But... it's a little fupa, a happy fupa. 651 00:28:52,163 --> 00:28:53,471 I would hate to see an angry one. 652 00:28:53,832 --> 00:28:55,038 Oh yeah we can't have that. 653 00:28:57,836 --> 00:28:59,474 Uh, what would you recommend? 654 00:28:59,904 --> 00:29:02,282 The chicken cutlet here is excellent. 655 00:29:02,907 --> 00:29:05,285 But I would stay away from cheese tonight if I were you. 656 00:29:06,077 --> 00:29:07,021 Why is that? 657 00:29:07,178 --> 00:29:08,782 Clogs up your anal cavity. 658 00:29:09,514 --> 00:29:10,458 I did not know that. 659 00:29:10,815 --> 00:29:11,885 Oh, except for goat cheese. 660 00:29:12,050 --> 00:29:14,052 You know there is some enzyme that makes it okay. 661 00:29:16,421 --> 00:29:18,196 This isn't good dinner conversation, is it? 662 00:29:18,323 --> 00:29:20,428 No, no, no... be yourself. 663 00:29:21,025 --> 00:29:24,234 Um.. I hear zucchini is great for down there. 664 00:29:24,395 --> 00:29:26,136 Most veggies are... okra is the best. 665 00:29:26,965 --> 00:29:28,035 I'm all about anal health. 666 00:29:28,199 --> 00:29:29,507 Oh, me too. 667 00:29:29,868 --> 00:29:31,779 It's just good manners. 668 00:29:32,937 --> 00:29:33,938 So, are you kids ready? 669 00:29:34,973 --> 00:29:35,951 Yes. 670 00:29:36,107 --> 00:29:37,882 I'll have the chicken fried steak, please. 671 00:29:38,243 --> 00:29:39,415 Chicken fried steak, you sir? 672 00:29:40,011 --> 00:29:41,820 - Just a burger: - Burger: 673 00:29:42,080 --> 00:29:43,024 No cheese! 674 00:29:44,549 --> 00:29:46,153 Oh, that's work, I've gotta take this. 675 00:29:46,317 --> 00:29:47,318 Okay. 676 00:29:50,955 --> 00:29:53,333 Oh, sweetie he is fine! 677 00:29:53,825 --> 00:29:55,862 I don't know why you're bothering with dinner: 678 00:29:56,027 --> 00:29:57,506 You're right put in that order; pronto! 679 00:29:57,862 --> 00:29:59,239 I will honey, I will. 680 00:30:19,217 --> 00:30:20,525 That was the best sex of my life. 681 00:30:20,885 --> 00:30:22,159 You're so high energy. 682 00:30:24,522 --> 00:30:26,024 You want games? 683 00:30:26,191 --> 00:30:28,000 I'll out-slut you in a second. 684 00:30:28,393 --> 00:30:30,236 Hey, round two at my place? 685 00:30:30,862 --> 00:30:34,173 This time, I'll do all the work. 686 00:30:55,386 --> 00:30:56,330 What are you doing home? 687 00:30:56,487 --> 00:30:57,591 You're supposed to be gone all night. 688 00:30:58,156 --> 00:31:00,136 Well, you're cleaning? It's Friday. 689 00:31:00,291 --> 00:31:02,237 Aren't you supposed to be bringing queers together? 690 00:31:02,393 --> 00:31:03,303 Well, 691 00:31:03,461 --> 00:31:05,202 It smells like poppers in here 692 00:31:05,430 --> 00:31:07,239 Where did you have your party? 693 00:31:07,398 --> 00:31:09,002 The police raided our last location, so... 694 00:31:09,167 --> 00:31:10,111 so? 695 00:31:10,268 --> 00:31:11,144 No! 696 00:31:11,302 --> 00:31:12,940 You got home before I could... 697 00:31:13,204 --> 00:31:14,842 Is that shit on my bedspread? 698 00:31:15,240 --> 00:31:16,241 That's not shit. 699 00:31:17,208 --> 00:31:18,551 That is shit! 700 00:31:18,910 --> 00:31:20,150 No, that is definitely not shit. 701 00:31:20,478 --> 00:31:21,422 It's biss. 702 00:31:21,579 --> 00:31:22,489 Biss? 703 00:31:22,647 --> 00:31:23,557 Butt piss. 704 00:31:23,915 --> 00:31:26,054 Oh God! That is so gross Luke, oh my god! 705 00:31:26,217 --> 00:31:27,127 I'm sorry! Somebody must have gone 706 00:31:27,285 --> 00:31:28,195 overboard with enemas. 707 00:31:28,353 --> 00:31:29,263 I'm... I'm doing laundry now 708 00:31:29,420 --> 00:31:31,400 Listen I was gonna tell you but I thought maybe... 709 00:31:31,556 --> 00:31:32,466 You thought maybe I would object 710 00:31:32,624 --> 00:31:34,467 to a gay sex party in my bedroom? 711 00:31:34,659 --> 00:31:35,899 That doesn't turn you on? 712 00:31:36,160 --> 00:31:38,140 No, it does not turn me on. 713 00:31:38,296 --> 00:31:40,298 That's the problem. I'm not one of you. 714 00:31:40,632 --> 00:31:41,610 Salome was rig ht 715 00:31:41,933 --> 00:31:43,935 I've just become way too enmeshed in your world. 716 00:31:44,335 --> 00:31:45,313 Listen, I'm sorry. 717 00:31:45,436 --> 00:31:46,346 I'm gonna wash everything... 718 00:31:46,504 --> 00:31:48,541 It's OKAY because I'm emancipating myself from this... 719 00:31:49,674 --> 00:31:51,381 Is that biss on the table cloth? 720 00:31:51,542 --> 00:31:52,452 It's not my biss. 721 00:31:52,610 --> 00:31:54,385 I don't care whose biss it is! 722 00:31:57,215 --> 00:31:59,354 And he just left a twenty. Cheap fucker! 723 00:31:59,550 --> 00:32:01,257 He walked out on you? 724 00:32:01,519 --> 00:32:02,497 Just like that? 725 00:32:04,188 --> 00:32:05,531 Were you being outrageous? 726 00:32:06,991 --> 00:32:08,334 I may have been a little outrageous. 727 00:32:09,460 --> 00:32:11,963 This is more than cosmetic you know that, rig ht? 728 00:32:12,664 --> 00:32:15,645 Make-up can clear blemishes and stuff... 729 00:32:16,000 --> 00:32:17,172 but not even top of the line 730 00:32:17,335 --> 00:32:19,281 L'Oreal can fix a fucked-up face. 731 00:32:20,471 --> 00:32:24,044 And what we have here is a fucked-up face. 732 00:32:26,010 --> 00:32:27,011 What are you saying? 733 00:32:28,212 --> 00:32:30,123 I'm saying surgery. 734 00:32:30,248 --> 00:32:33,252 You need to go under knife and kill the fag hag inside. 735 00:32:34,686 --> 00:32:37,030 Yes, okay. She's gone. 736 00:32:37,155 --> 00:32:38,566 Just snip her out. 737 00:32:38,690 --> 00:32:39,634 She's dead. 738 00:32:39,991 --> 00:32:40,696 Great. 739 00:32:41,059 --> 00:32:42,402 So what are you doing Thursday? 740 00:32:42,560 --> 00:32:44,597 Going outwith... friends. 741 00:32:46,631 --> 00:32:47,632 It's our ritual. 742 00:32:47,999 --> 00:32:49,205 It's your racket. 743 00:32:50,068 --> 00:32:51,342 Are you coachable? 744 00:32:52,170 --> 00:32:54,650 Yes, I'm coachable. What's happening? 745 00:32:55,340 --> 00:32:57,047 Well, a promoter friend of mine 746 00:32:57,175 --> 00:33:01,055 is launching a new weekly party Thursdays at Fine Feline. 747 00:33:01,446 --> 00:33:02,686 Want to be my plus-one? 748 00:33:03,114 --> 00:33:05,390 You want me to be your plus-one? 749 00:33:05,616 --> 00:33:09,154 I celebrate diversity, you know that. 750 00:33:10,621 --> 00:33:11,622 Plus I owe you one. 751 00:33:13,424 --> 00:33:14,494 Salome, wow, I'm... 752 00:33:14,659 --> 00:33:16,036 I'm very flattered. 753 00:33:17,028 --> 00:33:19,599 I'm gonna have a table with bottle service and everything. 754 00:33:20,331 --> 00:33:22,709 Did you know Markus was running a nursery out of our apartment? 755 00:33:23,101 --> 00:33:24,079 Maybe. 756 00:33:25,670 --> 00:33:26,740 Why didn't you tell me? 757 00:33:27,105 --> 00:33:28,607 Why is nobody talking to me? 758 00:33:28,740 --> 00:33:29,684 It's all on the blog. 759 00:33:30,041 --> 00:33:32,282 And I'm not going to be able to go out Thursday. 760 00:33:34,512 --> 00:33:35,456 Why not? 761 00:33:35,613 --> 00:33:37,024 Because you're a cock-blocker. 762 00:33:37,715 --> 00:33:39,592 No, Riley. 763 00:33:39,751 --> 00:33:41,196 It's because I'm never gonna get what I want 764 00:33:41,352 --> 00:33:43,332 if I keep repeating the same patterns of behavior. 765 00:33:43,488 --> 00:33:46,162 In other words... cock-blocker: 766 00:33:48,659 --> 00:33:50,195 What should I wear on Thursday? 767 00:33:50,328 --> 00:33:51,602 Uh.. okay let me see... 768 00:33:54,465 --> 00:33:56,570 Let the pussy out of the bag... 769 00:33:56,768 --> 00:34:00,079 Dress code: the cattier, the better. 770 00:34:53,157 --> 00:34:55,137 Are you wearing a fucking cat suit? 771 00:35:04,235 --> 00:35:05,213 Thank you very much. 772 00:36:25,950 --> 00:36:27,156 Hey Violet! 773 00:36:30,488 --> 00:36:32,297 Here kitty, kitty, kitty 774 00:36:32,890 --> 00:36:34,335 Hey stop! Where are you going so fast? 775 00:36:34,492 --> 00:36:35,470 Home. 776 00:36:35,626 --> 00:36:39,267 Isn't this the outfit you wore to the fetish ball...2007? 777 00:36:40,398 --> 00:36:41,399 Good memory. 778 00:36:41,566 --> 00:36:43,637 Yeah, well I always notice you. 779 00:36:44,535 --> 00:36:45,912 Oh, you might be the only one. 780 00:36:46,270 --> 00:36:47,248 Careful! 781 00:36:48,673 --> 00:36:52,712 Do you ever just feel like you don't belong anywhere? 782 00:36:54,278 --> 00:36:55,222 Hello. 783 00:36:55,379 --> 00:36:57,359 Why do you think I was so big into heroin. 784 00:36:58,516 --> 00:36:59,790 You're clean now, right? 785 00:36:59,951 --> 00:37:01,897 Yes, two yea rs. 786 00:37:03,421 --> 00:37:04,729 Damn. 787 00:37:10,561 --> 00:37:12,541 Look... Violet... 788 00:37:13,664 --> 00:37:16,508 Before I came here, before you ever knew me, 789 00:37:18,035 --> 00:37:20,538 no one wanted a thing to do with me. 790 00:37:21,939 --> 00:37:23,543 I swear, not anyone. 791 00:37:24,642 --> 00:37:28,522 Well, now we have all these friends and they... 792 00:37:28,679 --> 00:37:29,885 They love us. 793 00:37:30,548 --> 00:37:32,755 They shower us with all this attention 794 00:37:32,917 --> 00:37:34,954 Yeah, I mean, that doesn't hurt either: 795 00:37:41,592 --> 00:37:43,629 Well, attention doesn't sleep with you at night... 796 00:37:44,929 --> 00:37:45,907 well, not with me. 797 00:37:49,400 --> 00:37:50,708 Come here 798 00:37:54,839 --> 00:37:55,817 It's alright. 799 00:38:19,063 --> 00:38:20,041 Sorry. 800 00:38:21,666 --> 00:38:23,441 No, it's not you. It's just... 801 00:38:25,970 --> 00:38:27,313 I'm positive, you know. 802 00:38:28,539 --> 00:38:29,609 It's just kissing. 803 00:38:29,907 --> 00:38:31,944 Some people won't even share the same spoon. 804 00:38:32,677 --> 00:38:34,452 Some people are stupid. 805 00:38:36,414 --> 00:38:37,586 Ah, I'm stupid. 806 00:38:38,416 --> 00:38:41,022 Why am I kissing a gay boy? God! 807 00:38:41,385 --> 00:38:42,329 I'm retired. 808 00:38:42,486 --> 00:38:43,362 Retired? 809 00:38:43,521 --> 00:38:45,501 I want to be wanted, Zeus. 810 00:38:45,623 --> 00:38:47,000 It's not fair to me, okay? 811 00:38:47,358 --> 00:38:49,304 This fruit fly is finished. 812 00:38:59,437 --> 00:39:02,577 You have one new frisky friend. 813 00:39:02,740 --> 00:39:04,048 Hi! Salome... 814 00:39:04,408 --> 00:39:07,617 My dad owns the general store of the Idaho town where I grew up 815 00:39:07,778 --> 00:39:09,485 He expected me ta take it aver, 816 00:39:09,647 --> 00:39:11,888 but I came ta New York ta became an architect. 817 00:39:12,350 --> 00:39:14,762 I'm Vern and Pd love to hear your story. 818 00:39:15,653 --> 00:39:16,563 Vern? 819 00:39:16,721 --> 00:39:19,497 Violet! Hey, are you home? 820 00:39:19,990 --> 00:39:20,968 No. 821 00:39:21,459 --> 00:39:22,460 Can we talk? 822 00:39:22,760 --> 00:39:23,704 No. 823 00:39:23,861 --> 00:39:24,931 Are you on that phone line again? 824 00:39:25,096 --> 00:39:26,074 No! 825 00:39:28,132 --> 00:39:29,634 I need love. 826 00:39:30,735 --> 00:39:31,679 Me too. 827 00:39:41,145 --> 00:39:42,351 I miss Darian. 828 00:39:45,950 --> 00:39:49,022 You try too hard, women don't do that. 829 00:39:49,387 --> 00:39:50,092 I am just being myself. 830 00:39:50,454 --> 00:39:52,024 Exactly. Stop it. 831 00:39:53,023 --> 00:39:58,473 Now just close your eyes and simply ask the universe. 832 00:40:01,766 --> 00:40:05,771 The benevolent universe will always manifest what you need. 833 00:40:05,903 --> 00:40:06,813 That's not true. 834 00:40:06,971 --> 00:40:08,575 If I fall from a ten-story building, 835 00:40:08,739 --> 00:40:10,116 am I gonna manifest wings? 836 00:40:11,175 --> 00:40:17,091 No. But you can manifest a truckload of mattresses on the street below. 837 00:40:18,516 --> 00:40:19,995 You watch too many cartoons. 838 00:40:20,184 --> 00:40:21,993 What? It could happen. 839 00:40:24,121 --> 00:40:25,566 Gerald? 840 00:40:25,689 --> 00:40:26,827 Salome. 841 00:40:28,459 --> 00:40:29,403 How are you gorgeous? 842 00:40:29,560 --> 00:40:30,800 Can I get you a non-fat soy latte? 843 00:40:31,028 --> 00:40:34,601 Yes... what a coincidence. 844 00:40:34,899 --> 00:40:38,540 See Violet, I was just manifesting a non-fat soy latte. 845 00:40:38,769 --> 00:40:40,578 Fine Feline was major; huh? 846 00:40:40,704 --> 00:40:42,547 So major. 847 00:40:44,575 --> 00:40:46,714 Well, Violet didn't like it. 848 00:40:46,877 --> 00:40:48,151 Not major: 849 00:40:49,814 --> 00:40:51,088 Oh, cat-woman. 850 00:40:52,116 --> 00:40:53,186 Go on Gerald... 851 00:40:54,885 --> 00:40:58,992 Don't forget 16 splendas and a stir-stick, thanks. 852 00:41:00,491 --> 00:41:01,469 Voila. 853 00:41:01,725 --> 00:41:03,898 Notice my lack of effort? 854 00:41:04,462 --> 00:41:06,464 The lesson here is that the universe 855 00:41:06,630 --> 00:41:08,632 would never tell you to put on a pleather catsuit... 856 00:41:08,799 --> 00:41:10,710 so don't try so hard next time, ok? 857 00:41:10,868 --> 00:41:13,178 Oh, I'm not going back to Fine Feline again. 858 00:41:13,838 --> 00:41:16,079 You promised you were coachable. 859 00:41:16,240 --> 00:41:17,651 I'm gonna coach myself. 860 00:41:18,809 --> 00:41:20,516 You can't coach yourself! 861 00:41:20,678 --> 00:41:22,919 You'll never manifest a man that way. 862 00:41:23,514 --> 00:41:25,892 There's more then one way to skin a cat. 863 00:41:30,654 --> 00:41:32,964 That's funny... not true. 864 00:41:33,123 --> 00:41:34,193 But funny. 865 00:41:34,992 --> 00:41:38,064 Yeah, when we meet, I'll take you an a tour of lust gems. 866 00:41:38,229 --> 00:41:40,732 I'm very sentimental when it comes ta architecture. 867 00:41:40,898 --> 00:41:43,242 I adore sentimental men, Vern. 868 00:41:43,801 --> 00:41:44,905 We'll start with the Roxy. 869 00:41:45,069 --> 00:41:46,844 The Roxy! You've been? 870 00:41:47,004 --> 00:41:49,985 Spanish inspired interior, the soaring columns, 871 00:41:50,107 --> 00:41:51,711 it's rococo style rotunda 872 00:41:51,976 --> 00:41:53,922 The Roxy had a rococo rotunda? 873 00:41:54,044 --> 00:41:55,990 I really wish I could have seen it. 874 00:41:56,146 --> 00:41:57,989 Oh my gosh, I used to go all the time. 875 00:41:58,182 --> 00:42:00,560 Haw? It was demolished in 1961. 876 00:42:01,585 --> 00:42:02,586 The gay club? 877 00:42:03,087 --> 00:42:05,192 No! The Roxy was a movie palace 878 00:42:05,556 --> 00:42:06,591 Where the Rockettes began. 879 00:42:06,757 --> 00:42:09,169 The high-kicking, showgirl Rockettes? 880 00:42:09,527 --> 00:42:11,097 Originally they were the Roxy-ettes. 881 00:42:11,295 --> 00:42:12,933 Oh, the Roxy. 882 00:42:13,097 --> 00:42:14,940 You know there's a famous Life Magazine shot 883 00:42:15,099 --> 00:42:16,578 of Gloria Swanson standing on the rubble 884 00:42:16,734 --> 00:42:19,044 in a red baa as they tare it dawn. 885 00:42:21,672 --> 00:42:23,583 Gloria Swanson in a red boa? 886 00:42:24,008 --> 00:42:25,578 I have manifested a fag stag. 887 00:42:25,743 --> 00:42:26,813 You manifested a fag. 888 00:42:26,977 --> 00:42:28,888 Gloria Steinem never wore a boa. 889 00:42:29,246 --> 00:42:31,248 Gloria Swanson. Vern is straight! 890 00:42:31,615 --> 00:42:33,891 Bradleigh, do straight men know who Gloria Swanson is? 891 00:42:34,084 --> 00:42:36,064 Norma Desmond? Only if they're gay. 892 00:42:36,220 --> 00:42:37,130 Come on! 893 00:42:37,288 --> 00:42:40,599 Only gays obsess over faded, deluded, once beautiful women. 894 00:42:41,559 --> 00:42:42,537 We can relate. 895 00:42:42,693 --> 00:42:43,569 See! 896 00:42:43,727 --> 00:42:45,001 Climax Magazine is here. 897 00:42:45,563 --> 00:42:46,541 Marjorie Max. 898 00:42:47,731 --> 00:42:48,766 Violet, skedaddle. 899 00:42:50,668 --> 00:42:51,612 Gentlemen. 900 00:42:51,769 --> 00:42:52,713 Marjorie! 901 00:42:53,771 --> 00:42:54,749 Right this way. 902 00:42:56,240 --> 00:43:00,586 The inspiration for this season is punk, Pocahontas and prehistoric. 903 00:43:02,146 --> 00:43:05,684 Clever: I see we're into alliteration. 904 00:43:07,585 --> 00:43:09,792 This frill must be the �prehistoric�. 905 00:43:10,387 --> 00:43:11,991 Pterodactyl in heat? 906 00:43:12,690 --> 00:43:13,634 More or less. 907 00:43:16,994 --> 00:43:23,172 Ah, fur. You have no qualms about killing these cute little critters? 908 00:43:23,701 --> 00:43:25,578 Bradleigh says fur comes from trees. 909 00:43:25,869 --> 00:43:26,813 Fir trees. 910 00:43:28,072 --> 00:43:30,780 Look at me, pretending to care. 911 00:43:31,875 --> 00:43:34,981 I just don't see how it fits in to my story. 912 00:43:37,114 --> 00:43:39,253 I've seen you in Climax before. 913 00:43:39,650 --> 00:43:41,186 I modeled for the magazine once, yes. 914 00:43:41,352 --> 00:43:43,662 Oh don't remind me, long time ago. 915 00:43:43,821 --> 00:43:46,893 It was a matinee idol story? 916 00:43:47,057 --> 00:43:47,967 Yeah. 917 00:43:48,125 --> 00:43:49,866 This mug once was very lucrative. 918 00:43:50,027 --> 00:43:51,973 And perfect for the "Daddy" 919 00:43:52,129 --> 00:43:55,338 in this fall's editorial shot by Stephen Miser! 920 00:43:55,699 --> 00:43:57,872 Stephen Miser? Oh be still my beating heart. 921 00:43:58,035 --> 00:43:59,070 What's the story? 922 00:43:59,336 --> 00:44:01,316 I love Daddy! 923 00:44:02,239 --> 00:44:04,082 But I'm not old enough to be a Daddy. 924 00:44:10,381 --> 00:44:11,325 Tell you what. 925 00:44:11,682 --> 00:44:16,222 You be Climax magazine's �Daddy� and I'll give Bradleigh's 926 00:44:16,387 --> 00:44:20,927 prehistoric line some p-p-p-placement. 927 00:44:22,192 --> 00:44:25,036 Get ready for your close up, Norma. 928 00:44:32,102 --> 00:44:33,376 Do you have a minute for the children? 929 00:44:33,737 --> 00:44:35,239 You have got to be kidding me! 930 00:44:36,173 --> 00:44:38,244 Excuse me sir; do you have a minute for the children? 931 00:44:43,147 --> 00:44:44,319 Baby I'm home. 932 00:44:44,882 --> 00:44:46,259 Jim had a hysterectomy. 933 00:44:46,417 --> 00:44:47,896 Hey Violet is not coming to your reading, 934 00:44:48,052 --> 00:44:49,087 I think she's boycotting us. 935 00:44:49,219 --> 00:44:51,199 I can't believe I had to give him a hysterectomy. 936 00:44:51,355 --> 00:44:52,766 It's changed everything. 937 00:44:53,123 --> 00:44:54,101 What? 938 00:44:54,224 --> 00:44:55,202 Jim, in my novel. 939 00:44:55,459 --> 00:44:56,995 Sorry for Jim. 940 00:44:57,261 --> 00:44:58,433 How was your day, honey? 941 00:44:58,929 --> 00:44:59,873 Oh great. 942 00:45:00,597 --> 00:45:03,806 Bradleigh says you can join for our trip to Taipei in November. 943 00:45:04,935 --> 00:45:05,913 What trip? 944 00:45:06,070 --> 00:45:09,279 Remember Bradleigh won Designer of the Year in Taiwan? 945 00:45:09,473 --> 00:45:13,182 Right. But, you know in November I'll be in edits. 946 00:45:14,378 --> 00:45:16,915 Baby, you can bring your computer to Taipei. 947 00:45:17,514 --> 00:45:19,323 Come on, it's all-expense paid travel. 948 00:45:19,483 --> 00:45:20,427 It'll advance my career: 949 00:45:20,784 --> 00:45:22,923 A chance to forget babies and hysterectomies. 950 00:45:23,087 --> 00:45:24,998 Oh my God, don't remind me. It's so sad! 951 00:45:26,724 --> 00:45:28,897 So, are you in? 952 00:45:30,360 --> 00:45:33,807 Could we maybe swing by Polynesia on the way to Taipei? 953 00:45:33,964 --> 00:45:35,966 You know, Ashley showed me this great new site. 954 00:45:36,133 --> 00:45:38,170 There's not much red tape, they make it so much easier. 955 00:45:38,335 --> 00:45:39,313 What site? 956 00:45:39,903 --> 00:45:41,940 Adoptakanakababy.com 957 00:45:43,507 --> 00:45:46,317 Baby let's just check it out. No strings. 958 00:45:46,477 --> 00:45:49,048 It might break up the monotony of our lives. 959 00:45:49,213 --> 00:45:50,453 The monotony of our lives? 960 00:45:50,814 --> 00:45:52,987 Yeah. You know, maybe that's why Violet is boycotting us. 961 00:45:53,117 --> 00:45:54,960 Change is good. 962 00:45:58,422 --> 00:45:59,867 Come on baby, relax. 963 00:46:01,125 --> 00:46:02,103 Feels nice? 964 00:46:04,361 --> 00:46:05,305 Yeah, come on. 965 00:46:05,763 --> 00:46:06,867 That smell, is that? 966 00:46:07,030 --> 00:46:07,974 Baby oil. 967 00:46:08,298 --> 00:46:09,368 Isn't it wonderful? 968 00:46:13,904 --> 00:46:15,884 Polynesia is on the way to Taiwan, right? 969 00:46:16,540 --> 00:46:17,746 No... 970 00:46:18,008 --> 00:46:19,885 If you suck cock, hang up now. 971 00:46:20,544 --> 00:46:23,320 If you think you might enjoy sucking cock in the future, 972 00:46:23,447 --> 00:46:24,926 hang up now. 973 00:46:26,483 --> 00:46:29,487 Vern? Hello, Vern? 974 00:46:29,853 --> 00:46:30,797 I'm not gay- 975 00:46:32,356 --> 00:46:33,994 But you go to gay bars, right? 976 00:46:34,224 --> 00:46:35,464 Why in the world would I do that? 977 00:46:36,927 --> 00:46:38,907 Oh, well I had to ask. 978 00:46:39,163 --> 00:46:41,439 So, what are you into? 979 00:46:42,032 --> 00:46:43,010 What do you mean? 980 00:46:43,400 --> 00:46:47,974 I mean, what are you passionate about? 981 00:46:48,138 --> 00:46:50,243 Web', what I do Architecture. 982 00:46:50,407 --> 00:46:52,512 I'm especially fascinated with columns. 983 00:46:52,843 --> 00:46:53,787 Columns? 984 00:46:56,513 --> 00:47:00,552 Wanna talk about thick, rock hard shafts? 985 00:47:01,185 --> 00:47:02,323 What about them? 986 00:47:03,187 --> 00:47:06,862 How about putting them up my chimney pot, Mn Architect. Yeah? 987 00:47:07,825 --> 00:47:10,806 Then stucco my flying buttress to the wall! 988 00:47:11,361 --> 00:47:14,342 Uh, Salome, I'm just a normal guy. 989 00:47:15,232 --> 00:47:16,302 I can do normal. 990 00:47:16,466 --> 00:47:18,275 I want to be up front and let you know 991 00:47:18,435 --> 00:47:20,506 I'm looking for a simple kind of woman. 992 00:47:20,871 --> 00:47:23,579 That's me, I'm a simple girl. From Idaho. 993 00:47:24,208 --> 00:47:26,119 My face is rural too! 994 00:47:26,243 --> 00:47:28,587 I have an ample bosom and a... 995 00:47:28,946 --> 00:47:30,448 well, my whole body is kind of ample. 996 00:47:32,049 --> 00:47:33,528 I really wanna meet you and get frisky but 997 00:47:33,884 --> 00:47:36,296 if you're expecting some, I don't know, 998 00:47:36,453 --> 00:47:37,523 thin-hipped bitch who's gonna... 999 00:47:37,855 --> 00:47:38,560 I'm nut! 1000 00:47:38,922 --> 00:47:39,559 You're not? 1001 00:47:39,923 --> 00:47:41,869 Nu, I want a keeper, Salome. 1002 00:47:43,093 --> 00:47:44,071 Me, too. 1003 00:47:46,630 --> 00:47:48,576 And it's Violet. I lied. 1004 00:47:50,000 --> 00:47:52,913 Well, we all fib an Frisky Friends. 1005 00:47:53,904 --> 00:47:54,939 So what's your real name? 1006 00:47:55,239 --> 00:47:56,217 I mean, I know it's not Vern. 1007 00:47:56,373 --> 00:47:57,317 Nu, it is Vern. 1008 00:47:58,909 --> 00:48:01,947 Oh, well you have a nickname or anything? 1009 00:48:02,212 --> 00:48:03,316 My parents call me Chippy. 1010 00:48:05,215 --> 00:48:08,094 So, Vern, what did you fib about? 1011 00:48:08,385 --> 00:48:10,956 I don't know exactly but I probably did fib 1012 00:48:11,655 --> 00:48:15,102 Now that I know your name, Violet, do you stiff wanna meet? 1013 00:48:15,259 --> 00:48:17,637 Bethesda fountain. Same time? 1014 00:48:17,995 --> 00:48:19,906 10 am and I'll be wearing red. 1015 00:48:20,097 --> 00:48:22,008 Red hot. Can't wait! 1016 00:48:55,432 --> 00:48:56,536 You did lie. 1017 00:48:56,700 --> 00:48:57,644 Oh I can't take it this! 1018 00:48:57,968 --> 00:48:58,673 Hello? 1019 00:48:59,036 --> 00:49:00,344 Vern you are a liar! I can't take this! 1020 00:49:00,504 --> 00:49:02,142 No, no I can't! I can't! 1021 00:49:04,207 --> 00:49:05,151 Help! Help! 1022 00:49:05,309 --> 00:49:06,982 Please! No, I just can't! 1023 00:49:07,144 --> 00:49:08,088 Get away from me you lunatic! 1024 00:49:08,312 --> 00:49:10,019 Everyone's a fucking freak. 1025 00:49:10,180 --> 00:49:13,161 I just can't deal with this anymore. 1026 00:49:13,717 --> 00:49:15,458 Violet, is that you? 1027 00:49:17,254 --> 00:49:18,665 What are you doing down there? 1028 00:49:19,022 --> 00:49:20,330 Did you loose a contact or something? 1029 00:49:21,525 --> 00:49:22,503 Vern? 1030 00:49:28,065 --> 00:49:29,009 You must be Daddy. 1031 00:49:29,366 --> 00:49:30,344 Riley. 1032 00:49:31,001 --> 00:49:33,003 Hi, I'm Jenny. Matt's mom. 1033 00:49:33,403 --> 00:49:35,576 He looks like a complete angel, doesn't he? 1034 00:49:36,606 --> 00:49:37,550 Don't be fooled. 1035 00:49:37,708 --> 00:49:39,710 He's an absolutely unmanageable child. 1036 00:49:40,644 --> 00:49:41,622 So was I. 1037 00:49:43,113 --> 00:49:44,057 You have kids? 1038 00:49:45,048 --> 00:49:46,026 I'm gay. 1039 00:49:47,451 --> 00:49:49,294 No, no kids. 1040 00:49:49,453 --> 00:49:51,364 Alright if you worked a Stephen Miser set, 1041 00:49:51,521 --> 00:49:52,761 You know I don't wanna hear anyone, 1042 00:49:52,956 --> 00:49:54,196 I don't wanna see anyone 1043 00:49:54,358 --> 00:49:55,996 Unless it's through my lens. 1044 00:49:56,693 --> 00:50:00,607 Child. Love your Daddy, hmm? 1045 00:50:01,331 --> 00:50:02,241 Mn Miser; I'm 1046 00:50:02,399 --> 00:50:03,343 Poof! 1047 00:52:03,587 --> 00:52:04,565 Matt? 1048 00:52:04,688 --> 00:52:06,531 No! I wanna stay with Riley. 1049 00:52:07,324 --> 00:52:11,136 Hey it's ok buddy, your mom and I, we're gonna make plans. I promise. 1050 00:52:12,529 --> 00:52:14,873 Gotta go. C'mon hun. Sweetie! 1051 00:52:22,272 --> 00:52:24,718 The UN is the first international building in the US. 1052 00:52:27,244 --> 00:52:29,246 I suppose that concludes our tour: 1053 00:52:31,481 --> 00:52:33,290 I loved it. 1054 00:52:33,917 --> 00:52:35,123 Should we go for drinks? 1055 00:52:35,585 --> 00:52:37,360 Why in the world would I want to do that 1056 00:52:38,221 --> 00:52:39,598 When I can be with you alone. 1057 00:52:40,891 --> 00:52:42,461 Do you go drinking a lot? 1058 00:52:42,592 --> 00:52:43,627 I wouldn't say that. 1059 00:52:45,262 --> 00:52:47,242 I may have partied a little in my youth. 1060 00:52:47,397 --> 00:52:49,673 But that is behind me. 1061 00:52:51,868 --> 00:52:53,245 You're so beautiful. 1062 00:53:01,511 --> 00:53:02,455 Your place or mine? 1063 00:53:04,514 --> 00:53:06,516 You don't want to go home together on our first date? 1064 00:53:06,683 --> 00:53:09,425 No! umm no! Of course not. 1065 00:53:09,586 --> 00:53:11,657 I'm totally teasing. 1066 00:53:13,290 --> 00:53:14,234 Funny lady. 1067 00:53:14,391 --> 00:53:16,462 Come on. Let me walk you home. 1068 00:53:49,659 --> 00:53:50,660 Oh, baby you're home. 1069 00:53:50,827 --> 00:53:51,771 I'm almost ready. 1070 00:53:52,829 --> 00:53:53,807 So. 1071 00:53:54,598 --> 00:53:56,703 I checked out adoptakanakababy.com. 1072 00:53:57,400 --> 00:53:58,674 You did? 1073 00:54:00,370 --> 00:54:01,314 And? 1074 00:54:01,471 --> 00:54:04,543 And I didn't see anything about refunds or exchanges. 1075 00:54:06,009 --> 00:54:08,580 I also never imagined in my entire gay life 1076 00:54:08,745 --> 00:54:11,988 that the topic of children would ever come up. 1077 00:54:12,816 --> 00:54:18,459 Neither did I. But I guess secretly I hoped that it would. 1078 00:54:21,891 --> 00:54:22,835 What is that? 1079 00:54:22,993 --> 00:54:23,937 Markus 1080 00:54:25,562 --> 00:54:26,540 I love you 1081 00:54:26,663 --> 00:54:28,506 I want you to have everything you want. 1082 00:54:29,399 --> 00:54:30,639 Even if it's not what you want? 1083 00:54:32,702 --> 00:54:34,773 How will I know if we don't get a chance to practice? 1084 00:54:36,706 --> 00:54:37,650 Oh my god. 1085 00:54:37,807 --> 00:54:40,515 You got me a Toy Pomeranian? 1086 00:54:40,810 --> 00:54:43,313 You wanted a Toy Pomeranian since you were ten. 1087 00:54:43,580 --> 00:54:44,524 Well, that or a Chihuahua... 1088 00:54:44,681 --> 00:54:46,354 and you know how I feel about rats. 1089 00:54:48,852 --> 00:54:50,525 You've been reading my blog. 1090 00:54:52,889 --> 00:54:54,493 Oh, Thank you. 1091 00:55:16,780 --> 00:55:18,521 I thought you were an ex-Mormon? 1092 00:55:18,782 --> 00:55:21,058 I left the church, but I haven't been excommunicated. 1093 00:55:22,085 --> 00:55:23,325 Stick with me kid. 1094 00:55:24,454 --> 00:55:26,593 Wait a minute. 1095 00:55:26,723 --> 00:55:27,861 If you're not a Mormon, 1096 00:55:28,024 --> 00:55:29,662 why can't you enjoy a glass of wine with me? 1097 00:55:29,826 --> 00:55:30,770 I don't like it. 1098 00:55:32,062 --> 00:55:33,336 You told me you've never had a drink. 1099 00:55:33,630 --> 00:55:34,608 I haven't. 1100 00:55:35,098 --> 00:55:36,304 How do you know you don't like it? 1101 00:55:40,337 --> 00:55:42,374 Do I need to sleep with a man to know I don't like it? 1102 00:55:44,341 --> 00:55:45,319 You know them? 1103 00:55:46,976 --> 00:55:48,922 Ah, co-workers. 1104 00:55:50,680 --> 00:55:51,784 Actually they are pretty great. 1105 00:55:52,749 --> 00:55:56,720 Umm...we could go out with them sometime, if you wanted to. 1106 00:55:57,120 --> 00:55:58,326 Where would we go? 1107 00:55:58,988 --> 00:56:00,092 We could go to a gay ban 1108 00:56:01,558 --> 00:56:04,869 I think that'd be too much anthropology for this architect. 1109 00:56:06,796 --> 00:56:08,036 I told you I'm not very social. 1110 00:56:09,699 --> 00:56:10,769 Where do you go for fun? 1111 00:56:10,934 --> 00:56:11,878 To sleep. 1112 00:56:14,137 --> 00:56:15,582 I prefer to have my fun early. 1113 00:56:15,739 --> 00:56:16,877 I'm a big fan of column-watching. 1114 00:56:17,941 --> 00:56:19,352 Column-watching? 1115 00:56:19,509 --> 00:56:20,419 Yeah. 1116 00:56:20,577 --> 00:56:22,579 Tomorrow I'll be up before 5 to catch them at sunrise. 1117 00:56:22,912 --> 00:56:23,856 Holy fuck! 1118 00:56:24,013 --> 00:56:24,957 Sunrise? 1119 00:56:25,081 --> 00:56:26,617 Yeah, sunrise is my favorite time of day. 1120 00:56:27,684 --> 00:56:29,527 Well, if you want to catch the worm. 1121 00:56:29,686 --> 00:56:31,757 Or if you wanna see Corinthian columns come to life. 1122 00:56:31,921 --> 00:56:33,525 So, you just uh... 1123 00:56:34,824 --> 00:56:35,768 sit there and stare? 1124 00:56:35,925 --> 00:56:37,632 It's a form of meditation for me. 1125 00:56:37,794 --> 00:56:38,864 We all have our own way of getting centered 1126 00:56:39,028 --> 00:56:40,837 in this crazy city and that's mine. 1127 00:56:41,164 --> 00:56:42,472 Absolutely sweetie. 1128 00:56:42,632 --> 00:56:43,667 I mean whatever it takes. 1129 00:56:44,167 --> 00:56:45,145 You must think I'm freak. 1130 00:56:45,468 --> 00:56:47,141 - Most people think I'm a freak. - Most people think I'm a freak. 1131 00:56:48,071 --> 00:56:49,573 No! 1132 00:56:49,739 --> 00:56:51,412 No, actually I don't. 1133 00:56:53,009 --> 00:56:54,784 And I think columns are magnificent. 1134 00:56:57,547 --> 00:56:58,582 Do you want to watch them with me? 1135 00:56:59,182 --> 00:57:01,788 You might have to sleep over if you did. 1136 00:57:01,985 --> 00:57:02,963 Check! 1137 00:57:09,726 --> 00:57:10,864 Oh, okay. 1138 00:57:20,203 --> 00:57:24,151 Have my babies, have my babies 1139 00:57:25,575 --> 00:57:26,519 What? 1140 00:57:26,676 --> 00:57:28,553 Just making sure the condom is still on. 1141 00:57:28,711 --> 00:57:29,621 Of course it is. 1142 00:57:33,450 --> 00:57:34,929 Have my babies, have my babies! 1143 00:57:35,084 --> 00:57:36,825 Move to Idaho and have Chippy's babies. 1144 00:57:50,767 --> 00:57:51,768 Look. 1145 00:57:52,068 --> 00:57:53,138 Look now 1146 00:57:54,137 --> 00:57:55,115 Are you sleeping through this? 1147 00:57:55,472 --> 00:57:57,474 No, just resting my eyes. 1148 00:57:59,142 --> 00:58:02,954 Watch as the sun dances across the granite at each new moment. 1149 00:58:05,482 --> 00:58:06,222 Watch. 1150 00:58:07,083 --> 00:58:09,063 Look, magic. 1151 00:58:15,492 --> 00:58:16,197 Hey! Guess what? 1152 00:58:16,559 --> 00:58:17,731 You got a dog. 1153 00:58:17,894 --> 00:58:18,838 How'd you know? 1154 00:58:18,962 --> 00:58:19,906 Women know. 1155 00:58:20,530 --> 00:58:22,510 I also know that you were never going to get a dog. 1156 00:58:22,665 --> 00:58:25,839 You have to bend over and pick up the poop. Remember? 1157 00:58:26,269 --> 00:58:29,773 Baby makes Markus happy so I've changed. 1158 00:58:31,107 --> 00:58:32,916 You called a dog Baby? 1159 00:58:33,076 --> 00:58:34,714 You are such a lesbian. 1160 00:58:34,878 --> 00:58:36,880 Markus named him but thank you Donna. 1161 00:58:37,046 --> 00:58:37,956 How's the hymen? 1162 00:58:38,114 --> 00:58:39,218 You know my hymen - 1163 00:58:39,582 --> 00:58:40,560 hanging in there. 1164 00:58:42,752 --> 00:58:43,992 Come over tonight, meet Baby. 1165 00:58:44,153 --> 00:58:45,097 Oh, I can't. 1166 00:58:45,255 --> 00:58:46,199 Dinner with Vern. 1167 00:58:46,556 --> 00:58:48,558 Pre-game before Zeus' benefit at Vlada? 1168 00:58:48,725 --> 00:58:49,795 Oh, that's Friday night. 1169 00:58:49,959 --> 00:58:50,869 Oh shit! 1170 00:58:51,027 --> 00:58:52,267 I have plans with Vern Friday night. 1171 00:58:52,629 --> 00:58:53,767 Vern, Vern, Vern. 1172 00:58:53,897 --> 00:58:54,807 Bring Vern. 1173 00:58:54,964 --> 00:58:56,272 Uhm 1174 00:58:56,633 --> 00:58:58,635 I don't think he's gonna want to go. 1175 00:58:59,068 --> 00:59:00,274 We're all dying to meet him. 1176 00:59:00,904 --> 00:59:03,282 The timing is just not right. 1177 00:59:03,640 --> 00:59:06,712 I'm just not comfortable having him know about my past. 1178 00:59:07,777 --> 00:59:08,915 What's wrong with your past? 1179 00:59:09,078 --> 00:59:11,080 Oh, please don't take it personal. 1180 00:59:11,314 --> 00:59:12,292 You know the truth is 1181 00:59:13,283 --> 00:59:14,956 I don't even know if Vern's my type. 1182 00:59:15,118 --> 00:59:16,290 So you'd rather be with him 1183 00:59:16,619 --> 00:59:18,155 than with us for a cause you've always supported? 1184 00:59:18,321 --> 00:59:19,732 Don't worry, I'll stop by. 1185 00:59:20,657 --> 00:59:21,897 You act like it's such a burden. 1186 00:59:22,692 --> 00:59:25,002 I said I'll stop by, so leave it alone. 1187 00:59:26,195 --> 00:59:29,608 Dating is stressful enough without this extra pressure from you, 1188 00:59:29,732 --> 00:59:30,710 and texts from Luke. 1189 00:59:30,867 --> 00:59:34,110 And these super pokes from friends on Facebook I don't even know! 1190 00:59:38,041 --> 00:59:38,985 Love, 1191 00:59:39,142 --> 00:59:40,120 Vern 1192 00:59:40,310 --> 00:59:41,311 It's tough being popular. 1193 00:59:43,112 --> 00:59:45,558 I'm gonna name my first born Daisy. 1194 00:59:47,951 --> 00:59:48,895 It's that time of the month, huh? 1195 00:59:49,052 --> 00:59:51,999 - I hate when men do that. - Why do men always say that? 1196 00:59:55,725 --> 00:59:56,669 Wow. 1197 00:59:57,927 --> 01:00:01,101 The billionaire that got away used to send me pink daisies. 1198 01:00:01,864 --> 01:00:05,710 Letting him get away is the biggest regret of my life. 1199 01:00:05,935 --> 01:00:08,939 Not because we had anything in common, we didn't. 1200 01:00:09,105 --> 01:00:11,915 But it was this game he loved called Snooker: 1201 01:00:12,075 --> 01:00:13,019 What's that? 1202 01:00:13,810 --> 01:00:14,948 I don't really know. 1203 01:00:15,878 --> 01:00:17,152 And your point is? 1204 01:00:17,814 --> 01:00:19,020 My point is... 1205 01:00:19,182 --> 01:00:20,718 I never bothered to learn Snooker... 1206 01:00:20,883 --> 01:00:24,296 and now he's on a yacht in the Maldives with someone who did. 1207 01:00:26,155 --> 01:00:27,293 Was the sex good? 1208 01:00:27,690 --> 01:00:28,998 Standard missionary. 1209 01:00:29,759 --> 01:00:30,999 Vern, too. 1210 01:00:31,327 --> 01:00:32,670 Really vanilla. 1211 01:00:33,096 --> 01:00:34,040 I mean just... 1212 01:00:34,197 --> 01:00:35,642 we don't have that much in common, either: 1213 01:00:35,765 --> 01:00:36,743 Violet... 1214 01:00:37,000 --> 01:00:39,002 this guy sends you flowers. 1215 01:00:39,302 --> 01:00:41,282 He actually likes you. 1216 01:00:41,638 --> 01:00:42,946 He does, he likes me. 1217 01:00:43,106 --> 01:00:44,881 So he's got possibility. 1218 01:00:45,708 --> 01:00:48,655 And compatibility is not possibility. 1219 01:00:49,646 --> 01:00:50,784 All you've got to do now... 1220 01:00:51,080 --> 01:00:53,117 is fake interest in what interests him. 1221 01:00:53,683 --> 01:00:56,755 And then after that he's yours to mold any old way you want. 1222 01:00:59,722 --> 01:01:00,792 Am I right Donna? 1223 01:01:05,361 --> 01:01:06,931 What the fuck do you want? 1224 01:01:08,398 --> 01:01:09,775 You should want this. 1225 01:01:10,366 --> 01:01:11,674 He's boring. 1226 01:01:11,834 --> 01:01:14,337 Do you want to be loved, or do you want to be entertained? 1227 01:01:14,871 --> 01:01:16,214 I want to be entertained? 1228 01:01:16,372 --> 01:01:17,817 No, no, no!! 1229 01:01:17,974 --> 01:01:19,180 What happened to my vegan wedding? 1230 01:01:19,842 --> 01:01:20,843 Yeah, okay... 1231 01:01:21,010 --> 01:01:24,048 Yes, fine I stole your stanky ass strap-on! 1232 01:01:26,282 --> 01:01:29,263 In a roundabout way, Donna is supporting what I'm saying. 1233 01:01:29,419 --> 01:01:30,397 I doubt that. 1234 01:01:30,887 --> 01:01:32,764 And... what are you saying? 1235 01:01:34,357 --> 01:01:37,338 Compatibility is not possibility. 1236 01:01:37,960 --> 01:01:38,961 Violet... 1237 01:01:39,262 --> 01:01:40,332 learn the Snooker. 1238 01:02:04,954 --> 01:02:05,955 You watching me? 1239 01:02:07,457 --> 01:02:08,435 Maybe... 1240 01:02:10,793 --> 01:02:12,272 How are things going at the salon? 1241 01:02:13,029 --> 01:02:14,736 Ahh...drama. 1242 01:02:15,064 --> 01:02:16,475 Had to fire my receptionist. 1243 01:02:17,867 --> 01:02:18,845 She was a bitch. 1244 01:02:19,001 --> 01:02:19,911 Yeah. 1245 01:02:22,271 --> 01:02:23,215 Shall we... 1246 01:02:24,073 --> 01:02:26,986 call a truce to the dueling sluts? 1247 01:02:28,778 --> 01:02:29,756 Maybe. 1248 01:02:33,015 --> 01:02:34,289 You're here!! 1249 01:02:37,086 --> 01:02:38,463 Oh my god! Did you see the silent auction? 1250 01:02:38,688 --> 01:02:39,223 No! 1251 01:02:39,388 --> 01:02:41,595 I made Markus put money on Liza Minelli's g-string. 1252 01:02:41,824 --> 01:02:42,768 And I'm winning! 1253 01:02:45,061 --> 01:02:46,267 You guys are bombed. 1254 01:02:46,429 --> 01:02:48,204 Open bar. Hello! 1255 01:02:48,364 --> 01:02:49,365 What can we get you to drink? 1256 01:02:49,532 --> 01:02:52,069 No, nothing I can't be drunk when I see Vern 1257 01:02:52,769 --> 01:02:54,407 Oh, sorry I missed your reading. 1258 01:02:54,904 --> 01:02:55,882 Oh, that's okay. 1259 01:02:58,040 --> 01:02:59,348 Violet turned down a free drink? 1260 01:03:01,410 --> 01:03:04,254 I know, she's... not herself. I told you. 1261 01:03:06,949 --> 01:03:09,259 Thank you so much for all your support and encouragement. 1262 01:03:09,552 --> 01:03:11,498 Just wait, I mention you in my speech. 1263 01:03:11,854 --> 01:03:12,764 To think you used to let people assume 1264 01:03:12,922 --> 01:03:14,902 you were just some dumb stripper: 1265 01:03:16,492 --> 01:03:17,903 Cha-ching! I have found it's best not to 1266 01:03:18,060 --> 01:03:19,266 challenge people's assumptions. 1267 01:03:19,428 --> 01:03:22,204 Who said a go-go boy can't be the hero? 1268 01:03:23,032 --> 01:03:24,102 I know... 1269 01:03:24,967 --> 01:03:27,072 Hey you gonna join us on Thursday at Gym Bar? 1270 01:03:27,303 --> 01:03:28,509 I won't. 1271 01:03:28,838 --> 01:03:30,317 In fact tonight... 1272 01:03:31,407 --> 01:03:33,182 is sort of my cameo appearance. 1273 01:03:35,077 --> 01:03:36,055 Retirement? 1274 01:03:37,814 --> 01:03:38,815 What's that about? 1275 01:03:39,448 --> 01:03:42,122 Come on. It sounds like you're running away from home to me. 1276 01:03:42,585 --> 01:03:44,064 I'm doing what's best for me. 1277 01:03:44,420 --> 01:03:45,797 Are you sure about this? 1278 01:03:46,989 --> 01:03:48,229 You wanna talk about it? 1279 01:03:48,558 --> 01:03:49,798 I'd love to... 1280 01:03:50,359 --> 01:03:51,838 but it's the pumpkin hour: 1281 01:03:52,428 --> 01:03:54,032 Congratulations. 1282 01:03:55,064 --> 01:03:56,008 6:30? 1283 01:03:56,165 --> 01:03:57,303 You can't leave. 1284 01:03:57,433 --> 01:03:58,411 You're gonna miss my speech. 1285 01:03:59,869 --> 01:04:01,143 No, you can't leave. 1286 01:04:01,437 --> 01:04:03,383 Come on... stay and then... 1287 01:04:03,539 --> 01:04:05,541 Afterwards you can come back to my place... 1288 01:04:05,908 --> 01:04:08,354 we'll bake cookies, watch Beaches. 1289 01:04:08,911 --> 01:04:09,821 I have Kylie Karaoke. 1290 01:04:09,979 --> 01:04:11,856 I love Kylie Karaoke! 1291 01:04:12,014 --> 01:04:13,118 Well, then say yes. 1292 01:04:14,550 --> 01:04:15,585 I'm terrified of rejection. 1293 01:04:15,918 --> 01:04:17,488 Oh, you have never been rejected! 1294 01:04:17,987 --> 01:04:19,091 In your life. 1295 01:04:22,491 --> 01:04:23,469 You have no idea. 1296 01:04:26,162 --> 01:04:28,870 And Zeus said you're working on an anti-violence benefit next. 1297 01:04:29,031 --> 01:04:31,170 And one for the Trevor Project after that. 1298 01:04:31,634 --> 01:04:33,136 I'm impressed. 1299 01:04:33,336 --> 01:04:34,280 Thanks. 1300 01:04:34,437 --> 01:04:35,939 Yeah, Zeus is really insistent we reach out to 1301 01:04:36,105 --> 01:04:37,049 straight people too, which is... 1302 01:04:37,173 --> 01:04:39,414 kind of intimidating since I don't know any. 1303 01:04:40,543 --> 01:04:42,318 Except for Violet, but yeah... 1304 01:04:42,511 --> 01:04:43,489 always Violet. 1305 01:04:44,347 --> 01:04:45,883 This sounds like a great opportunity. 1306 01:04:46,549 --> 01:04:48,654 Who knows there might be hope for you yet. 1307 01:04:49,418 --> 01:04:50,761 What do you mean hope for me? 1308 01:04:51,487 --> 01:04:54,491 Just hope... you break out of your limited gay world. 1309 01:04:55,191 --> 01:04:57,296 Oh, that's rich coming from a hairdresser: 1310 01:04:58,361 --> 01:04:59,339 Hair-stylist. 1311 01:04:59,562 --> 01:05:01,235 Whatever: Still not much hope for you. 1312 01:05:01,397 --> 01:05:02,467 Can you please stop with the games? 1313 01:05:02,632 --> 01:05:03,770 You started the games. 1314 01:05:03,933 --> 01:05:04,638 Well, I'm through. 1315 01:05:05,001 --> 01:05:07,106 You want to keep playing, play with someone else. 1316 01:05:07,270 --> 01:05:08,180 I often do. 1317 01:05:09,238 --> 01:05:13,209 Max, I just want you to know that you are this close to having me. 1318 01:05:13,376 --> 01:05:15,617 Luke, I'm really sorry but I can't talk now. 1319 01:05:16,445 --> 01:05:18,982 He is on the clock. 1320 01:05:21,350 --> 01:05:22,556 Oh, for Heaven sake! 1321 01:05:23,619 --> 01:05:24,597 Zeus 1322 01:05:24,954 --> 01:05:25,898 kiss me. 1323 01:05:26,022 --> 01:05:27,296 Luke, I am flattered. 1324 01:05:27,456 --> 01:05:28,332 Don't be. 1325 01:05:28,491 --> 01:05:29,663 Just take me home and ravage me. 1326 01:05:30,393 --> 01:05:31,895 Ah Zeus, I've got issues. 1327 01:05:33,162 --> 01:05:34,163 Yes, you do. 1328 01:05:34,530 --> 01:05:35,668 You got issues too. 1329 01:05:35,998 --> 01:05:37,306 Are we gonna be alone forever? 1330 01:05:37,466 --> 01:05:40,140 It depends on your definition of alone, doesn't it? 1331 01:05:41,203 --> 01:05:42,546 How long have you been in the city now? 1332 01:05:43,039 --> 01:05:44,017 About 4 yea rs. 1333 01:05:44,173 --> 01:05:46,346 4 years and I have never once seen you with a boyfriend. 1334 01:05:46,709 --> 01:05:47,653 Nope. 1335 01:05:48,010 --> 01:05:49,455 You never come to my sex parties either: 1336 01:05:50,379 --> 01:05:51,380 You know I have poz events. 1337 01:05:51,614 --> 01:05:53,025 They're not my thing. 1338 01:05:54,016 --> 01:05:56,121 So what gets you going, big boy? 1339 01:05:56,285 --> 01:05:58,060 It's way off your radar: 1340 01:05:59,355 --> 01:06:01,631 I wonder if you'd even treat me the same if you knew. 1341 01:06:03,192 --> 01:06:04,170 Two boys, one plunger: 1342 01:06:04,293 --> 01:06:05,931 Ewww, no. 1343 01:06:07,163 --> 01:06:08,107 Bartender; can I get a drink? 1344 01:06:08,264 --> 01:06:09,208 One second. 1345 01:06:09,332 --> 01:06:10,504 What happened to Violet? 1346 01:06:11,000 --> 01:06:12,104 She just bolted out of here. 1347 01:06:12,535 --> 01:06:13,605 What's going on with your BFF? 1348 01:06:14,670 --> 01:06:16,149 My BFF is MIA. 1349 01:06:17,106 --> 01:06:18,107 She is umm... 1350 01:06:19,275 --> 01:06:20,515 She's dating somebody. 1351 01:06:21,143 --> 01:06:22,121 What? 1352 01:06:22,244 --> 01:06:23,279 Wh...who? 1353 01:06:23,980 --> 01:06:25,254 Who's she dating? 1354 01:06:29,285 --> 01:06:30,229 Unicorn? 1355 01:06:31,287 --> 01:06:33,597 The mythical Unicorn! 1356 01:06:33,756 --> 01:06:34,700 Shhhh! 1357 01:06:35,057 --> 01:06:36,365 I'm not ready to come out yet. 1358 01:06:36,993 --> 01:06:37,971 Oh! 1359 01:06:38,194 --> 01:06:40,231 Oh you are fascinating. 1360 01:06:43,099 --> 01:06:45,739 Well so what? I mean my roommate is gay. 1361 01:06:46,769 --> 01:06:47,713 Does he have HIV? 1362 01:06:48,070 --> 01:06:49,048 No. 1363 01:06:49,205 --> 01:06:50,309 But what if he did? 1364 01:06:50,573 --> 01:06:52,575 Well then I'd be concerned for your health and safety. 1365 01:06:52,875 --> 01:06:56,220 See, this is why we need to make HIV stigma-free. 1366 01:06:57,313 --> 01:07:00,192 Why shouldn't HIV have a stigma? 1367 01:07:00,349 --> 01:07:01,259 I mean it is preventable. 1368 01:07:01,417 --> 01:07:03,419 What about 70's high-rises and pre-fabricated homes, 1369 01:07:03,619 --> 01:07:05,189 they have a stigma, right? 1370 01:07:06,122 --> 01:07:07,601 Okay, but we're talking about people. 1371 01:07:07,723 --> 01:07:09,361 People, not buildings. 1372 01:07:09,525 --> 01:07:10,469 What is wrong with you? 1373 01:07:10,593 --> 01:07:11,503 You're absolutely right. 1374 01:07:11,660 --> 01:07:13,230 I'm sorry, I'm just frustrated. 1375 01:07:13,396 --> 01:07:15,376 I've been after these Biedermeier chairs on e-bay all day. 1376 01:07:15,531 --> 01:07:16,441 Oh, well... 1377 01:07:16,599 --> 01:07:18,340 If you're outbid, there'll be others. 1378 01:07:18,501 --> 01:07:19,536 You're a patient man. 1379 01:07:19,702 --> 01:07:22,342 It's not everyday you find matching Beidermeier chairs on e-bay. 1380 01:07:22,505 --> 01:07:24,041 Where would they fit in your apartment? 1381 01:07:24,206 --> 01:07:26,413 I'm shipping them back to my folks with all the rest. 1382 01:07:27,543 --> 01:07:28,487 Oh, you're moving back? 1383 01:07:29,345 --> 01:07:30,289 Eventually. 1384 01:07:31,547 --> 01:07:34,391 Idaho's not really column country, I'm afraid. 1385 01:07:35,518 --> 01:07:38,556 Bonneville is one of the fastest growing counties in the country. 1386 01:07:38,721 --> 01:07:41,258 So there is plenty of work, and I'll be renovating the homestead. 1387 01:07:41,690 --> 01:07:42,668 You'd love my folks. 1388 01:07:44,160 --> 01:07:46,037 Would you ever consider moving back? 1389 01:07:47,329 --> 01:07:49,309 I kinda moved away on purpose. 1390 01:07:49,732 --> 01:07:50,733 Me, too. 1391 01:07:51,367 --> 01:07:52,345 But I look around at my friends 1392 01:07:52,501 --> 01:07:53,605 and co-workers and... 1393 01:07:54,770 --> 01:07:56,215 they don't mean much. 1394 01:07:57,573 --> 01:07:59,177 I think what really matters is... 1395 01:08:00,810 --> 01:08:01,788 who matters. 1396 01:08:05,381 --> 01:08:06,359 Vern, 1397 01:08:07,083 --> 01:08:08,494 teach me about the Snooker 1398 01:08:08,651 --> 01:08:09,595 I mean the Beidermeier. 1399 01:08:11,087 --> 01:08:12,157 Why do you love it so? 1400 01:08:12,321 --> 01:08:14,460 Beidermeier is an unpretentious classic. 1401 01:08:16,425 --> 01:08:17,460 Devoid of... 1402 01:08:18,594 --> 01:08:19,834 unnecessary embellishment. 1403 01:08:22,198 --> 01:08:24,075 You can keep taking things off, you know. 1404 01:08:34,443 --> 01:08:37,481 Not to change the subject, but have you had cheese today? 1405 01:08:39,281 --> 01:08:40,316 I don't think so. 1406 01:08:40,649 --> 01:08:44,153 I took this tantric class on the sacred spot massage. 1407 01:08:44,320 --> 01:08:45,424 Would you let me... 1408 01:08:45,821 --> 01:08:47,823 help you release some of that e-bay tension? 1409 01:08:49,425 --> 01:08:52,565 Babe, you could show Le Corbusier the golden ratio in a Frank Gehry. 1410 01:08:55,798 --> 01:08:57,835 Now, just relax and trust me. 1411 01:09:01,437 --> 01:09:02,415 Ooops, sorry! 1412 01:09:02,571 --> 01:09:03,481 My bad. 1413 01:09:11,313 --> 01:09:12,291 Who's that? 1414 01:09:12,414 --> 01:09:13,358 Oh never mind, just relax. 1415 01:09:13,616 --> 01:09:14,754 I got 8 inches for you. 1416 01:09:18,354 --> 01:09:19,458 You want my 8 inches? 1417 01:09:20,789 --> 01:09:21,767 What, you gonna fuck me twice? 1418 01:09:24,493 --> 01:09:27,406 Most men hold their tension in the pelvic floor 1419 01:09:27,563 --> 01:09:29,565 which is why the sacred spot massage is so important. 1420 01:09:29,932 --> 01:09:31,912 I mean it really makes you more peaceful. 1421 01:09:32,668 --> 01:09:35,444 That's why you don't see the gays marching off to war. 1422 01:09:37,606 --> 01:09:38,550 Who's that? 1423 01:09:39,175 --> 01:09:40,483 Shhhh. 1424 01:09:40,643 --> 01:09:42,645 Okay, here we go. 1425 01:09:49,752 --> 01:09:51,493 That's so wild. 1426 01:09:53,189 --> 01:09:54,600 It's good, ha? 1427 01:09:59,895 --> 01:10:01,465 Chippy likes it wild. 1428 01:10:03,299 --> 01:10:04,869 Wild is good. 1429 01:10:09,205 --> 01:10:11,242 Hey, I can see you're busy, but can I borrow a condom. 1430 01:10:21,917 --> 01:10:23,521 Take this blindfold off. 1431 01:10:26,522 --> 01:10:27,933 Violet, you can't live like this. 1432 01:10:28,290 --> 01:10:29,428 I got to get you out of here now. 1433 01:10:29,992 --> 01:10:30,970 Come on you can stay with me. 1434 01:10:31,293 --> 01:10:32,203 Okay, I'll pack. 1435 01:10:32,361 --> 01:10:33,567 Let's just go. 1436 01:10:33,729 --> 01:10:34,639 Now. 1437 01:10:34,797 --> 01:10:35,741 OkaY 1438 01:10:35,898 --> 01:10:36,808 Help? 1439 01:10:36,999 --> 01:10:37,977 Oh! 1440 01:11:00,256 --> 01:11:01,633 Ashley adopted in Namibia. 1441 01:11:02,591 --> 01:11:03,592 How was that experience? 1442 01:11:03,759 --> 01:11:05,432 Better than giving birth, 1443 01:11:05,728 --> 01:11:09,232 Actually I'm not so sure, Africa can be notoriously difficult. 1444 01:11:09,798 --> 01:11:11,402 Joey, play nice! 1445 01:11:16,272 --> 01:11:17,683 So what are you writing these days? 1446 01:11:18,440 --> 01:11:19,976 No more fiction, no. 1447 01:11:20,342 --> 01:11:22,253 Now I write daily blogs about my children. 1448 01:11:23,946 --> 01:11:24,890 Children? 1449 01:11:25,047 --> 01:11:27,288 Number two is on the way. 1450 01:11:27,549 --> 01:11:29,756 Darling, today blogs begin at conception. 1451 01:11:32,488 --> 01:11:33,432 Mommy I gotta go. 1452 01:11:33,589 --> 01:11:34,590 Not now. 1453 01:11:39,928 --> 01:11:41,669 Oh she's so cranky when she's teething. 1454 01:11:41,830 --> 01:11:44,504 I had to go to the doctor to get some Xanax just to get through it. 1455 01:11:52,608 --> 01:11:54,053 It's your other daddy! 1456 01:11:54,410 --> 01:11:55,514 He'?- 1457 01:11:56,712 --> 01:11:57,713 Hey Matt. 1458 01:11:57,913 --> 01:11:58,891 How are you doing? 1459 01:12:03,585 --> 01:12:04,689 Where is my big boy? 1460 01:12:04,853 --> 01:12:06,491 Come here! 1461 01:12:06,655 --> 01:12:08,464 Oh, you okay? 1462 01:12:08,924 --> 01:12:09,868 We're fine. 1463 01:12:10,025 --> 01:12:10,969 I'm Markus. 1464 01:12:11,327 --> 01:12:12,863 Oh Markus, I'm Jenny. 1465 01:12:12,995 --> 01:12:15,771 This is Riley's boyfriend, I mean partner: 1466 01:12:15,898 --> 01:12:17,036 I never know what to say. 1467 01:12:17,399 --> 01:12:18,571 We never know either. 1468 01:12:18,734 --> 01:12:19,906 Husband, actually. 1469 01:12:20,736 --> 01:12:21,874 Markus is my husband. 1470 01:12:23,038 --> 01:12:26,315 Husband, husband, husband 1471 01:12:34,950 --> 01:12:38,022 I want these personally delivered to 77 7th Avenue 1472 01:12:41,724 --> 01:12:42,998 My boyfriend bought it for me. 1473 01:12:45,127 --> 01:12:46,606 No. 1474 01:12:46,762 --> 01:12:47,740 What? 1475 01:12:49,531 --> 01:12:50,805 What's so goddamned funny? 1476 01:12:51,100 --> 01:12:52,943 Well, I'm not laughing with you. 1477 01:12:55,904 --> 01:12:58,407 What have you manifested? 1478 01:12:58,907 --> 01:12:59,977 He's in your office. 1479 01:13:05,681 --> 01:13:06,625 Donna! 1480 01:13:06,782 --> 01:13:07,760 Boss? 1481 01:13:08,150 --> 01:13:10,994 I finally found the inspiration for my fall line: 1482 01:13:11,387 --> 01:13:12,923 Bedouin tents. 1483 01:13:13,489 --> 01:13:14,467 Yeah? 1484 01:13:14,623 --> 01:13:16,569 I understand they're mildew-resistant. 1485 01:13:19,695 --> 01:13:20,833 Is it that hideous? 1486 01:13:21,130 --> 01:13:23,076 It's just... not you, is all. 1487 01:13:24,666 --> 01:13:25,610 Well, 1488 01:13:25,868 --> 01:13:27,074 Vern likes me this way 1489 01:13:27,469 --> 01:13:29,107 I'm gonna pretend like I didn't hear that. 1490 01:13:30,439 --> 01:13:31,543 I know what you're thinking. 1491 01:13:32,107 --> 01:13:33,381 Yeah, probably. 1492 01:13:33,675 --> 01:13:36,656 What if I wanna get married and move far, far away? 1493 01:13:37,579 --> 01:13:38,557 What? 1494 01:13:38,714 --> 01:13:39,749 Audrey did it. 1495 01:13:39,915 --> 01:13:42,452 And I can only assume she's very happy. 1496 01:13:42,818 --> 01:13:43,853 You're not Audrey. 1497 01:13:44,653 --> 01:13:46,860 I turned 40 this year; Riley. 40! 1498 01:13:47,022 --> 01:13:48,626 I'm like the oldest living fag hag. 1499 01:13:48,791 --> 01:13:49,667 Vern... 1500 01:13:49,825 --> 01:13:52,465 Vern might be my last chance to settle down. 1501 01:13:52,628 --> 01:13:54,869 Settle just about sums it up. 1502 01:13:56,064 --> 01:13:58,101 You are not a woman. You do not know the pressures... 1503 01:13:58,467 --> 01:13:59,468 I know you! 1504 01:13:59,635 --> 01:14:00,511 So? 1505 01:14:00,669 --> 01:14:03,445 So you've never covered up. You've never ignored your friends. 1506 01:14:03,605 --> 01:14:06,552 And you told me to kill you dead if you ever; ever changed fora man. 1507 01:14:06,708 --> 01:14:09,951 You told me to kill you if ever; ever you changed for a man. 1508 01:14:10,846 --> 01:14:11,916 How have 1...? 1509 01:14:13,215 --> 01:14:15,593 Sure it's just the dog being housebroken? 1510 01:14:17,453 --> 01:14:18,193 Okay. 1511 01:14:18,554 --> 01:14:19,498 Okay? 1512 01:14:19,655 --> 01:14:20,531 Okay. 1513 01:14:20,689 --> 01:14:21,633 You wanna be an asshole? 1514 01:14:22,791 --> 01:14:23,701 I'm the asshole? 1515 01:14:23,859 --> 01:14:24,837 Get over there. Yes, you're the asshole. 1516 01:14:24,993 --> 01:14:26,199 Oh fuck you. 1517 01:14:26,528 --> 01:14:27,438 Fuck you! 1518 01:14:27,596 --> 01:14:28,506 Yeah, roll the parachute up. 1519 01:14:28,664 --> 01:14:29,734 Should we check with Vern? 1520 01:14:29,865 --> 01:14:30,775 You know I'm wearing the dress, 1521 01:14:30,933 --> 01:14:31,911 but I also got the balls. 1522 01:14:32,067 --> 01:14:33,011 Oh that's fine with me because... 1523 01:14:33,135 --> 01:14:34,079 You wanna go check with Baby? 1524 01:14:35,504 --> 01:14:36,482 Oh, you're on my hair! 1525 01:14:45,681 --> 01:14:46,659 Oww! No biting! 1526 01:14:46,815 --> 01:14:47,793 Ouch! 1527 01:14:50,752 --> 01:14:52,823 Oww! You hit me. 1528 01:14:52,988 --> 01:14:54,467 Bradleigh wants the camera. 1529 01:14:59,194 --> 01:15:01,504 Okay.. that was fucking hot. 1530 01:15:10,639 --> 01:15:13,017 It'd be an honor to model for your ad campaign, Bradleigh. 1531 01:15:13,976 --> 01:15:15,080 It's Brad-LAY 1532 01:15:15,244 --> 01:15:16,848 Oh, Brad-LAY, sorry. 1533 01:15:20,015 --> 01:15:21,892 That Marc Jacobs ad was shot in Maine. 1534 01:15:22,050 --> 01:15:25,259 Ocean was so icy my junk just nearly shriveled right up! 1535 01:15:27,189 --> 01:15:28,964 You're new to the city I take it? 1536 01:15:29,525 --> 01:15:30,868 Just got in last Friday. 1537 01:15:32,027 --> 01:15:33,199 We're gonna take a quick photo. 1538 01:15:34,196 --> 01:15:35,174 Hi, I'm Violet. 1539 01:15:35,531 --> 01:15:36,874 Oh, hi I'm Cyd. 1540 01:15:37,032 --> 01:15:39,137 But call me J-Flame... everybody does. 1541 01:15:40,836 --> 01:15:41,814 J-Flame? 1542 01:15:44,273 --> 01:15:46,913 I just realized I don't have anything that will fit you. 1543 01:15:47,075 --> 01:15:49,646 Oh, everything fits me. 1544 01:15:49,811 --> 01:15:50,551 I'm sample size. 1545 01:15:50,712 --> 01:15:51,281 True. 1546 01:15:51,613 --> 01:15:53,183 You got a great look. 1547 01:15:53,815 --> 01:15:56,056 I could use the color in my ad campaign... 1548 01:15:56,718 --> 01:15:59,631 or sprawled on my chinchilla rug. 1549 01:15:59,788 --> 01:16:02,826 So lamentably the truth is you're just too swishy 1550 01:16:02,958 --> 01:16:04,096 to model for Bradleigh. 1551 01:16:05,661 --> 01:16:06,605 Swishy? 1552 01:16:06,762 --> 01:16:08,036 Swi-SHAY. 1553 01:16:08,764 --> 01:16:11,108 But modeling only has to do with how I look. 1554 01:16:12,868 --> 01:16:14,609 Who told you that? 1555 01:16:23,845 --> 01:16:24,846 What? 1556 01:16:25,047 --> 01:16:26,924 Go do an email blast. 1557 01:16:52,240 --> 01:16:54,186 When you told me last night you loved me... 1558 01:16:54,343 --> 01:16:55,287 Did you mean it? 1559 01:16:58,914 --> 01:17:00,154 Where the hell have you been? 1560 01:17:00,315 --> 01:17:02,591 I haven't seen you in like a week. I have huge news. 1561 01:17:02,751 --> 01:17:03,695 What the hell are you wearing? 1562 01:17:03,952 --> 01:17:04,930 Vern took me shopping. 1563 01:17:05,087 --> 01:17:06,327 Okay. Was he the Vern? 1564 01:17:07,055 --> 01:17:09,057 Yes, but you know after your rude interruption 1565 01:17:09,224 --> 01:17:11,135 we spent the most amazing week together: 1566 01:17:11,293 --> 01:17:13,364 And I'm not gonna say anything else because I don't wanna jinx it. 1567 01:17:13,729 --> 01:17:14,673 Hello naked boy in my house. 1568 01:17:14,830 --> 01:17:15,740 I'm Andre. 1569 01:17:16,632 --> 01:17:18,134 I'm going to go grab another cup of coffee. 1570 01:17:18,266 --> 01:17:19,609 Anybody else want? 1571 01:17:20,135 --> 01:17:21,136 No, thanks. 1572 01:17:23,238 --> 01:17:24,216 He won't leave. 1573 01:17:24,940 --> 01:17:26,977 You might soon be in the market for a new roommate. 1574 01:17:27,142 --> 01:17:28,280 What do you mean? You're not leaving. 1575 01:17:28,644 --> 01:17:30,123 Things are moving kinda quickly. 1576 01:17:30,278 --> 01:17:31,382 I haven't even met Vern. 1577 01:17:31,713 --> 01:17:33,124 I think that's why they are going so great. 1578 01:17:33,315 --> 01:17:36,125 I also happen to know that you're keeping him from Markus and Riley. 1579 01:17:36,284 --> 01:17:37,388 How can you be nesting with someone 1580 01:17:37,719 --> 01:17:38,925 who doesn't even know your best friends? 1581 01:17:39,087 --> 01:17:40,691 How could he possibly know you? 1582 01:17:42,357 --> 01:17:43,768 What's your huge news? 1583 01:17:44,026 --> 01:17:45,767 I found your fag stag. 1584 01:17:46,662 --> 01:17:47,970 Fine as fine can be... 1585 01:17:48,230 --> 01:17:49,971 and honey, he is into you. 1586 01:17:50,298 --> 01:17:51,242 I know him? 1587 01:17:51,400 --> 01:17:52,242 Yes! 1588 01:17:52,401 --> 01:17:53,311 Who? 1589 01:17:53,602 --> 01:17:54,979 When am I meeting Vern? 1590 01:17:55,137 --> 01:17:56,411 You're not. 1591 01:17:56,738 --> 01:17:58,740 Okay, are you ashamed of your friends? 1592 01:17:58,907 --> 01:18:00,648 Or you ashamed of yourself, huh? 1593 01:18:02,144 --> 01:18:03,282 I could live here. 1594 01:18:05,681 --> 01:18:06,682 Oh boy. 1595 01:18:07,716 --> 01:18:09,423 Oh, Saturday afternoon is great. 1596 01:18:10,285 --> 01:18:11,889 Oh, I don't know. 1597 01:18:12,954 --> 01:18:13,898 What about you? 1598 01:18:20,228 --> 01:18:21,969 I'd really like to go to Central Park. 1599 01:18:23,865 --> 01:18:26,869 We could stroll through the rambles... 1600 01:18:27,035 --> 01:18:28,343 picnic at Cherry Hill... 1601 01:18:29,705 --> 01:18:30,706 gaze at the Dakota? Mmm hmm... 1602 01:18:36,978 --> 01:18:38,252 I prefer to wait for the light. 1603 01:18:38,413 --> 01:18:39,414 There's no traffic. 1604 01:18:40,882 --> 01:18:41,826 There's no traffic! 1605 01:18:41,983 --> 01:18:43,257 It's one of the ways I practice patience. 1606 01:18:43,385 --> 01:18:44,420 Oh, for Pete's sake. 1607 01:18:45,220 --> 01:18:46,426 What are you gonna do with me? 1608 01:18:48,290 --> 01:18:49,360 Practice patience. 1609 01:19:19,988 --> 01:19:21,331 Lot of men checking you out. 1610 01:19:26,895 --> 01:19:27,965 Oh, hi Violet! 1611 01:19:28,130 --> 01:19:29,837 Women, too. Are you famous? 1612 01:19:33,068 --> 01:19:34,172 Look. Gargoyle! 1613 01:19:36,805 --> 01:19:38,045 What in the world is going on here? 1614 01:19:39,975 --> 01:19:42,956 I totally forgot that this lawn is a... 1615 01:19:43,378 --> 01:19:44,356 boy-hive. 1616 01:19:45,280 --> 01:19:47,988 Vern, I am afraid that something is about to go down 1617 01:19:48,150 --> 01:19:49,026 and I need to tell you. 1618 01:19:49,184 --> 01:19:50,492 What is it? You can tell me anything. 1619 01:19:51,353 --> 01:19:52,331 Remember my roommate? 1620 01:19:52,954 --> 01:19:54,399 I was blindfolded at the time. 1621 01:19:55,123 --> 01:19:56,864 He's just the tip of... you know 1622 01:19:57,025 --> 01:19:58,333 all my life I've been a fruit fly. 1623 01:19:58,560 --> 01:19:59,538 What? 1624 01:19:59,895 --> 01:20:00,771 Fag hag? Queen mother? 1625 01:20:00,929 --> 01:20:02,431 Every last man in my life is gay. 1626 01:20:02,831 --> 01:20:03,775 We'll get through this. 1627 01:20:03,932 --> 01:20:04,876 Vernon, run! 1628 01:20:05,033 --> 01:20:05,943 No, wait! 1629 01:20:06,535 --> 01:20:07,445 What is going on here? 1630 01:20:07,803 --> 01:20:08,781 This is an intervention. 1631 01:20:09,237 --> 01:20:10,181 Just give me a minute. 1632 01:20:10,338 --> 01:20:11,373 No, please. We want him to stay. 1633 01:20:11,540 --> 01:20:12,416 Who are you people? 1634 01:20:12,574 --> 01:20:13,348 We're her friends 1635 01:20:13,508 --> 01:20:14,418 More than friends. 1636 01:20:15,377 --> 01:20:16,947 In a totally not sexual way, but... 1637 01:20:17,579 --> 01:20:19,923 This is us at our first pride, remember that? 1638 01:20:20,415 --> 01:20:21,985 You've always been unconditional... 1639 01:20:22,350 --> 01:20:25,229 and we support you no matter who you choose to love. 1640 01:20:25,520 --> 01:20:28,296 But your heterosexuality is hurting us in the following ways: 1641 01:20:29,991 --> 01:20:31,334 Since you met Vern, it feels like you're 1642 01:20:31,493 --> 01:20:33,336 becoming someone who's not Violet. 1643 01:20:33,461 --> 01:20:35,099 How dare you say I'm not good for Violet. 1644 01:20:35,263 --> 01:20:37,038 Honestly, it's not about you. 1645 01:20:37,299 --> 01:20:38,300 It's about hen 1646 01:20:46,274 --> 01:20:47,218 Vern, no. 1647 01:20:47,375 --> 01:20:48,319 Wait! 1648 01:20:48,443 --> 01:20:49,353 I haven't even read mine yet. 1649 01:20:49,511 --> 01:20:50,546 We just wanna be part of your life. 1650 01:20:52,447 --> 01:20:54,051 I knew this was a bad idea. 1651 01:21:35,523 --> 01:21:39,266 Free hugs! 1652 01:21:41,162 --> 01:21:42,140 Free hugs! 1653 01:21:43,899 --> 01:21:44,900 Free hug. 1654 01:21:59,047 --> 01:22:01,049 Oh, frisky... great... 1655 01:22:13,929 --> 01:22:15,272 What?!? 1656 01:22:17,532 --> 01:22:19,534 You know surrogates are really hard to come by. 1657 01:22:19,701 --> 01:22:22,011 Yes, and expensive. 1658 01:22:22,203 --> 01:22:24,774 The best deal is this agency in India. 1659 01:22:25,040 --> 01:22:25,814 - Really? - Yeah. 1660 01:22:25,974 --> 01:22:28,318 You give them 20 grand, fly down there with the egg and the sperm 1661 01:22:28,476 --> 01:22:30,786 9 months later fly back and pick up your newborn. 1662 01:22:31,179 --> 01:22:32,954 Can't they just Fed-Ex the baby back? 1663 01:22:34,149 --> 01:22:37,130 Well, Riley and I were thinking about going the Polynesian route. 1664 01:22:37,619 --> 01:22:39,963 You know Peter and I are gonna do that for our next one. 1665 01:22:40,121 --> 01:22:41,259 You two should really look into it. 1666 01:22:41,423 --> 01:22:42,697 You might get a two-for-one special. 1667 01:22:43,058 --> 01:22:44,002 Oh yeah. 1668 01:22:59,307 --> 01:23:00,251 Are you okay, sweetie? 1669 01:23:00,408 --> 01:23:01,352 Are you okay? 1670 01:23:02,177 --> 01:23:03,155 What's going on? 1671 01:23:04,512 --> 01:23:05,490 You alright? 1672 01:23:05,981 --> 01:23:06,959 Just breathe. 1673 01:23:07,082 --> 01:23:08,459 Like Lamaze breathing... 1674 01:23:13,989 --> 01:23:14,990 like that. 1675 01:23:17,258 --> 01:23:19,067 Maybe we should have heard them out. 1676 01:23:20,095 --> 01:23:21,005 Why? 1677 01:23:21,162 --> 01:23:22,106 We have each other now. 1678 01:23:22,397 --> 01:23:24,035 My friends aren't placeholders. 1679 01:23:25,033 --> 01:23:27,172 I'm not sure I like your friends. 1680 01:23:28,203 --> 01:23:30,274 You're gonna have to give them another shot. 1681 01:23:30,772 --> 01:23:32,979 Seems like you don't like them much either: 1682 01:23:33,742 --> 01:23:35,517 Well, you're wrong. I love them. 1683 01:23:36,344 --> 01:23:37,550 Remember what you said? 1684 01:23:38,179 --> 01:23:39,317 They are who matters... 1685 01:23:40,048 --> 01:23:41,049 to me. 1686 01:23:41,549 --> 01:23:42,687 Well, that's a shame because I thought 1687 01:23:43,051 --> 01:23:44,325 I'd be the one that mattered to you. 1688 01:23:45,086 --> 01:23:46,724 Well of course you do. 1689 01:23:49,357 --> 01:23:50,734 I've got a proposal for you. 1690 01:23:53,728 --> 01:23:56,504 These are the renovations to my homestead in Idaho. 1691 01:23:56,664 --> 01:23:58,143 Outside Idaho Falls. 1692 01:23:59,701 --> 01:24:02,181 I hired a contractor and I wanted you to see the plans 1693 01:24:02,337 --> 01:24:03,441 to see if you approved. 1694 01:24:04,439 --> 01:24:05,417 It's a Victorian... 1695 01:24:05,573 --> 01:24:07,610 lots of acreage, fresh ail: 1696 01:24:07,776 --> 01:24:09,084 Aren't your parents still there? 1697 01:24:09,244 --> 01:24:10,314 It's 5000 square feet... 1698 01:24:10,445 --> 01:24:12,482 and my folks... my folks would adore you. 1699 01:24:13,181 --> 01:24:15,024 Look... here's my dad. 1700 01:24:16,684 --> 01:24:19,028 I'm sure I'd love them. 1701 01:24:19,287 --> 01:24:21,460 I just don't know if this is the life for Violet. 1702 01:24:21,589 --> 01:24:24,695 And I got plane tickets, for the end of November: 1703 01:24:25,760 --> 01:24:26,761 You got plane tickets? 1704 01:24:27,462 --> 01:24:28,440 You didn't ask me. 1705 01:24:28,596 --> 01:24:29,267 Will you go? 1706 01:24:29,431 --> 01:24:32,139 Well, I'm going to Taiwan with Bradleigh in November: 1707 01:24:32,300 --> 01:24:33,438 I'm sure they'll let you off work. 1708 01:24:33,601 --> 01:24:36,343 It's only couple of weeks and if they don't... 1709 01:24:37,372 --> 01:24:38,373 I make enough for two. 1710 01:24:38,573 --> 01:24:40,553 I'd like the facade to stay original 1711 01:24:40,708 --> 01:24:43,211 you know how sentimental I am about architecture 1712 01:24:43,344 --> 01:24:45,517 but the interior needs to be totally gutted. 1713 01:24:46,414 --> 01:24:48,485 You have this whole thing worked out, don't you? 1714 01:24:50,552 --> 01:24:52,122 They're just plans. They can change. 1715 01:24:52,854 --> 01:24:54,265 What about my life here? 1716 01:24:55,623 --> 01:24:56,761 We'd start a whole new life. 1717 01:24:57,792 --> 01:25:00,136 Why in the world would I want to do that? 1718 01:25:00,795 --> 01:25:01,796 Idaho? 1719 01:25:02,363 --> 01:25:03,364 You're kidding? 1720 01:25:03,698 --> 01:25:06,178 There's like one decent gay bar in Idaho. 1721 01:25:06,334 --> 01:25:08,336 What are you saying Violet? You're scaring me. 1722 01:25:08,503 --> 01:25:09,413 And it's in Pocatello! 1723 01:25:10,638 --> 01:25:12,242 I'm not a simple girl. 1724 01:25:12,607 --> 01:25:14,587 I'm a complex, subversive woman 1725 01:25:14,742 --> 01:25:17,313 and I can't pretend anymore that I'm not. 1726 01:25:17,779 --> 01:25:20,555 Vern, I have totally misrepresented myself. 1727 01:25:20,715 --> 01:25:23,662 Stop. What did I do? What did I say? 1728 01:25:24,185 --> 01:25:25,163 Nothing. 1729 01:25:25,320 --> 01:25:26,697 Sweet Vern, I'm so sorry. 1730 01:25:29,491 --> 01:25:32,404 It's not you... it's me. 1731 01:25:48,576 --> 01:25:49,520 I love you. 1732 01:25:51,613 --> 01:25:52,751 What did you just say? 1733 01:25:52,914 --> 01:25:53,892 I said I love you. 1734 01:25:57,886 --> 01:25:58,830 What's my name? 1735 01:25:59,187 --> 01:26:00,257 I am so in love with you. 1736 01:26:00,421 --> 01:26:01,331 OkaY 1737 01:26:02,657 --> 01:26:03,692 I think you need to go. 1738 01:26:04,392 --> 01:26:05,370 But I love you. 1739 01:26:05,493 --> 01:26:06,437 Yeah. 1740 01:26:08,830 --> 01:26:09,808 You gotta go. 1741 01:26:56,811 --> 01:26:57,721 Hello ? 1742 01:26:57,879 --> 01:27:00,257 I'm sorry I couldn't tell you before, but I love you. 1743 01:27:01,482 --> 01:27:02,426 Do you hear me? 1744 01:27:02,584 --> 01:27:03,562 Me tau. 1745 01:27:04,586 --> 01:27:06,327 And I know sucking every last cock in the city 1746 01:27:06,588 --> 01:27:08,226 is not the best way to show you 1747 01:27:08,489 --> 01:27:10,127 but I am madly in love with you Darian. 1748 01:27:10,458 --> 01:27:11,459 It's Dad. 1749 01:27:11,626 --> 01:27:12,570 What? 1750 01:27:12,727 --> 01:27:14,229 Luke, this is your father. 1751 01:27:14,829 --> 01:27:16,433 Oh my god, wrong number. 1752 01:27:20,969 --> 01:27:26,317 You have 473 new Frisky Friends. 1753 01:28:01,576 --> 01:28:02,816 I love you. 1754 01:28:12,820 --> 01:28:15,892 I feel like I'm stuck in A Small World. 1755 01:28:17,058 --> 01:28:21,336 Hostage on a boat with all those little Dutch kids singing. 1756 01:28:21,496 --> 01:28:22,440 Okay. 1757 01:28:23,631 --> 01:28:24,666 I hate this ride. 1758 01:28:24,832 --> 01:28:26,402 Then let's get off it for a while. 1759 01:28:26,934 --> 01:28:27,912 There are other rides, you know. 1760 01:28:28,303 --> 01:28:29,281 I know Riley... 1761 01:28:29,871 --> 01:28:30,849 I know. 1762 01:28:31,506 --> 01:28:33,747 We don't have to keep going round and round on the same old one. 1763 01:28:34,008 --> 01:28:37,046 No, no we don't. We can have it all 1764 01:28:39,814 --> 01:28:42,920 Now if you'd just get out of the playpen... 1765 01:28:55,897 --> 01:28:57,570 So, what do you really think about Vern? 1766 01:28:58,966 --> 01:29:00,343 I wouldn't kick him out of bed. 1767 01:29:01,936 --> 01:29:03,609 That's not saying a whole lot. 1768 01:29:06,908 --> 01:29:09,320 Oh my gosh, did you hear what happened 1769 01:29:09,544 --> 01:29:11,455 last night between Riley and Markus? 1770 01:29:11,612 --> 01:29:12,522 No. 1771 01:29:12,680 --> 01:29:14,489 I got the craziest text. 1772 01:29:14,649 --> 01:29:15,855 What now? 1773 01:29:16,484 --> 01:29:19,294 We'll just wait and look at it on the blog, 1774 01:29:19,620 --> 01:29:21,361 but you know same old, same old. 1775 01:29:23,791 --> 01:29:25,634 How long have those two been together? 1776 01:29:26,361 --> 01:29:28,432 I don't know, like 50 years. 1777 01:29:32,400 --> 01:29:35,677 Yesterday was a disaster on all counts. 1778 01:29:38,106 --> 01:29:40,950 Hey, do you ever just think of just like, 1779 01:29:41,109 --> 01:29:44,113 I don't know quitting everything and going back to school or something? 1780 01:29:44,479 --> 01:29:45,856 School? What would we study? 1781 01:29:46,013 --> 01:29:47,651 You mean like choose a major? 1782 01:29:47,882 --> 01:29:49,293 Yeah, choose a major: 1783 01:29:52,420 --> 01:29:53,865 I'm still undecided. 1784 01:29:55,890 --> 01:29:56,891 Me too. 1785 01:29:59,827 --> 01:30:01,807 Pull out all the stops. I want the works. 1786 01:30:02,096 --> 01:30:03,040 You got it. 1787 01:30:03,398 --> 01:30:05,002 I'm working Luke's sex party tonight 1788 01:30:05,533 --> 01:30:06,443 and this weekend is my debutante ball 1789 01:30:06,601 --> 01:30:10,378 where I will be formally reintroduced into gay society. 1790 01:30:10,671 --> 01:30:11,581 You're coming rig ht? 1791 01:30:11,739 --> 01:30:12,683 Absolutely. 1792 01:30:14,909 --> 01:30:15,910 How is Luke? 1793 01:30:16,177 --> 01:30:17,656 He's fine. 1794 01:30:19,747 --> 01:30:20,987 He drunk dialed his dad. 1795 01:30:21,849 --> 01:30:22,827 Sounds right. 1796 01:30:23,117 --> 01:30:24,755 He meant to drunk dial you. 1797 01:30:26,120 --> 01:30:29,158 If only he wasn't so stubborn, so sarcastic. 1798 01:30:29,524 --> 01:30:30,798 Luke has his problems. 1799 01:30:32,093 --> 01:30:33,401 He's so infuriating. 1800 01:30:35,062 --> 01:30:36,040 And yet... 1801 01:30:37,832 --> 01:30:39,436 he's the only person I want to wake up with. 1802 01:30:40,435 --> 01:30:43,416 I do not understand why two people who have so much in common 1803 01:30:43,571 --> 01:30:45,710 just wanna pick each other apart all the time. 1804 01:30:46,574 --> 01:30:48,576 You're gonna end up two bitter old queens 1805 01:30:48,743 --> 01:30:50,017 and lord knows we have enough of those. 1806 01:30:52,146 --> 01:30:53,887 Does this necklace make me look fat? 1807 01:30:55,049 --> 01:30:56,187 Oh, come on. I've missed you. 1808 01:30:56,551 --> 01:30:57,791 I missed you too. 1809 01:30:57,919 --> 01:30:59,057 Does it make me look fat though? 1810 01:30:59,520 --> 01:31:00,055 - No. - Okay, good. 1811 01:31:02,590 --> 01:31:03,796 I need to see your penis. 1812 01:31:04,459 --> 01:31:05,494 I love this job. 1813 01:31:07,094 --> 01:31:09,165 Uncut. Like a little calamari. 1814 01:31:11,232 --> 01:31:12,438 Thanks. 1815 01:31:13,534 --> 01:31:14,569 Penis please. 1816 01:31:17,505 --> 01:31:18,449 Grower? 1817 01:31:18,606 --> 01:31:19,550 Bottom. 1818 01:31:21,542 --> 01:31:23,453 Hey sweetie. Thanks 1819 01:31:24,579 --> 01:31:25,580 Hey babe. 1820 01:31:26,581 --> 01:31:27,525 Go on in. 1821 01:31:27,682 --> 01:31:28,786 Don't you need to see my dick? 1822 01:31:29,584 --> 01:31:31,564 I'm pretty sure you're not the police. 1823 01:31:32,086 --> 01:31:33,121 Don't you want to? 1824 01:31:34,222 --> 01:31:35,462 Go in. 1825 01:31:37,191 --> 01:31:38,636 She's not getting it bro. 1826 01:31:38,960 --> 01:31:41,236 Violet, I told him you'd be here. 1827 01:31:42,997 --> 01:31:44,806 I'm setting you up. Hello!? 1828 01:31:44,966 --> 01:31:45,910 Fag stag. 1829 01:31:47,635 --> 01:31:49,979 But you... sexy dance for men. 1830 01:31:53,574 --> 01:31:56,714 You love Bette Midler, your favorite movie is Beaches. 1831 01:32:00,214 --> 01:32:02,091 Oh my god... 1832 01:32:04,252 --> 01:32:06,027 You're making me blush. 1833 01:32:06,621 --> 01:32:08,100 I don't think I've blushed before. 1834 01:32:09,023 --> 01:32:10,024 Alright you guys. 1835 01:32:10,525 --> 01:32:13,665 Take it into the back, I will take over from here. 1836 01:32:21,102 --> 01:32:22,080 Hey there. 1837 01:32:22,236 --> 01:32:24,273 40 dollars and your dick please. 1838 01:32:25,773 --> 01:32:26,683 What the fuck? 1839 01:32:26,841 --> 01:32:27,751 Eww 1840 01:32:27,909 --> 01:32:29,684 They got breeders back there. 1841 01:32:30,044 --> 01:32:31,717 I only threw up a little bit Luke. 1842 01:32:31,879 --> 01:32:33,916 Guys I'm just bringing queers together: 1843 01:32:34,081 --> 01:32:35,526 Yeah, queers. 1844 01:32:35,750 --> 01:32:37,661 Split me like a wishbone! 1845 01:32:39,287 --> 01:32:40,265 Okay, that's... 1846 01:32:41,022 --> 01:32:42,558 that's pretty queen 1847 01:32:42,823 --> 01:32:43,995 That's our Violet. 1848 01:32:48,062 --> 01:32:50,099 Excuse me, do you have a minute for the children? 1849 01:33:04,612 --> 01:33:05,613 How you doing? 1850 01:33:06,614 --> 01:33:07,957 You don't have my keys anymore but... 1851 01:33:09,650 --> 01:33:10,754 I still have yours. 1852 01:33:16,757 --> 01:33:18,862 Darian, I love you. 1853 01:33:19,594 --> 01:33:22,165 I do, I love you. 1854 01:33:22,330 --> 01:33:23,240 Luke... 1855 01:33:24,265 --> 01:33:25,243 What? 1856 01:33:26,601 --> 01:33:28,103 It's not gonna suck itself. 1857 01:33:31,038 --> 01:33:33,211 Maybe this time around we shouldn't begin with a blow job. 1858 01:33:53,928 --> 01:33:54,929 Hey there. 1859 01:33:56,230 --> 01:33:58,676 I knew you were coming. 1860 01:34:00,968 --> 01:34:03,642 Actually, I'm here to see Violet. 1861 01:34:05,373 --> 01:34:06,716 These aren't for me? 1862 01:34:07,008 --> 01:34:07,986 No. 1863 01:34:12,747 --> 01:34:15,921 Violet, you have a visitor: 1864 01:34:17,818 --> 01:34:21,356 Sorry for the mix up. You understand. 1865 01:34:26,127 --> 01:34:27,367 Hey, how you doing sweetie? 1866 01:34:27,561 --> 01:34:28,505 Good! 1867 01:34:29,230 --> 01:34:30,174 These are for you. 1868 01:34:30,331 --> 01:34:31,241 Thank you very much. 1869 01:34:31,399 --> 01:34:35,108 I thought I'd pop in and surprise invite you to lunch. 1870 01:34:35,670 --> 01:34:37,240 I'm going to lunch with Riley and Markus. 1871 01:34:37,471 --> 01:34:38,506 Couples counseling. 1872 01:34:38,706 --> 01:34:39,684 Oh, okay. 1873 01:34:40,341 --> 01:34:41,684 Wanna have dinner? 1874 01:34:41,942 --> 01:34:43,353 Sure, great. 1875 01:34:43,978 --> 01:34:46,891 Maybe we can all get together and do something after? 1876 01:34:47,181 --> 01:34:49,855 Yes, and you'll be at my deb. ball, yeah? 1877 01:34:50,151 --> 01:34:51,221 With bells on. 1878 01:34:52,053 --> 01:34:53,726 Just bells, right? 1879 01:34:54,321 --> 01:34:55,299 Right. 1880 01:34:57,725 --> 01:35:01,298 Okay well... give the boys a hug from me. 1881 01:35:01,462 --> 01:35:02,668 I will, I'll call you later. 1882 01:35:02,930 --> 01:35:04,204 Yeah. Please do. 1883 01:35:05,766 --> 01:35:07,040 I'll go to lunch with him. 1884 01:35:08,769 --> 01:35:09,713 You don't eat. 1885 01:35:09,870 --> 01:35:10,848 I could learn. 1886 01:35:12,073 --> 01:35:13,211 Where did you find him? 1887 01:35:13,841 --> 01:35:14,819 Gay sex club. 1888 01:35:15,810 --> 01:35:16,948 Don't be ridiculous. 1889 01:35:20,247 --> 01:35:21,351 How is that possible? 1890 01:35:22,717 --> 01:35:23,457 Well... 1891 01:35:24,351 --> 01:35:25,989 I'd tell you, but Salome... 1892 01:35:26,153 --> 01:35:28,326 I just don't think you're coachable. 1893 01:35:37,031 --> 01:35:38,305 Come on, I gotta piss. 1894 01:35:38,466 --> 01:35:40,844 Guys! How is it going? 1895 01:35:41,302 --> 01:35:42,280 Good. 1896 01:35:42,436 --> 01:35:43,915 They're in love and I'm here with my baby. 1897 01:35:44,038 --> 01:35:44,948 Waaa! 1898 01:35:45,106 --> 01:35:46,710 A very colicky baby. 1899 01:35:48,042 --> 01:35:49,885 Still sleeping in the playpen? 1900 01:35:50,311 --> 01:35:52,154 My life is an open blog. 1901 01:35:54,215 --> 01:35:56,752 I'm sorry, he just needed a little fluff. 1902 01:35:59,954 --> 01:36:01,092 Thank you for the poppers. 1903 01:36:03,791 --> 01:36:04,735 Hey, hey...debutante! 1904 01:36:04,892 --> 01:36:05,836 It's been ages. 1905 01:36:05,993 --> 01:36:08,269 It has. I'm thrilled to be back. 1906 01:36:11,098 --> 01:36:13,237 Ah! I can't believe he wants me. 1907 01:36:13,467 --> 01:36:16,038 Violet, modesty has never suited you. 1908 01:36:16,203 --> 01:36:17,375 That's true and I love it. 1909 01:36:17,538 --> 01:36:20,178 I love that you guys are finally slobbering over my man. 1910 01:36:20,341 --> 01:36:22,514 I've already installed a nanny-cam in your bedroom. 1911 01:36:23,811 --> 01:36:25,051 It's the best sex I've ever had. 1912 01:36:25,212 --> 01:36:29,354 Oh my goodness. And it's not just the sex, we have this spark. 1913 01:36:29,950 --> 01:36:31,361 Well, it's not just the sex. 1914 01:36:32,419 --> 01:36:34,194 Darian, what have you done with Luke? 1915 01:36:34,355 --> 01:36:35,425 I don't know. 1916 01:36:35,523 --> 01:36:37,093 But he's trying to steamroll me into monogamy. 1917 01:36:37,258 --> 01:36:38,236 No I am not! 1918 01:36:38,392 --> 01:36:40,235 So Violet how does it feel to be back? 1919 01:36:40,895 --> 01:36:41,805 Feels so good to be home. 1920 01:36:41,962 --> 01:36:44,340 And if and when you two get your bundle of joy 1921 01:36:44,498 --> 01:36:46,273 you better make me the fairy godmother: 1922 01:36:46,867 --> 01:36:48,505 Honey, you already are. 1923 01:36:50,204 --> 01:36:51,376 Get the fuck out of my way. 1924 01:36:52,173 --> 01:36:53,846 Donna, what are you doing here? 1925 01:36:54,108 --> 01:36:55,018 Slumming. 1926 01:36:55,176 --> 01:36:56,280 Hey, its Next Magazine. 1927 01:36:56,811 --> 01:36:57,915 My Deb ball! 1928 01:36:58,946 --> 01:37:00,482 Zeus, get over here. 1929 01:37:04,318 --> 01:37:06,127 Paparazzi, no photos. 1930 01:37:09,857 --> 01:37:12,269 I beseech you, no photos!131411

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