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1
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GROANING,
STRAINING
2
00:00:03,960 --> 00:00:06,000
AIMEE: Dad?
3
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:08,160
Dad?
4
00:00:08,160 --> 00:00:09,960
Ben Tyldesley.
5
00:00:09,960 --> 00:00:11,960
Ben Tyldesley!
6
00:00:11,960 --> 00:00:13,960
Get in!
HE LAUGHS
7
00:00:13,960 --> 00:00:16,960
How could I forget the name
of the first boy
8
00:00:16,960 --> 00:00:19,000
lucky enough to kiss my little girl?
9
00:00:26,960 --> 00:00:28,960
Aimee, that's strong stuff,
that, innit?
10
00:00:28,960 --> 00:00:30,960
Oh!
11
00:00:30,960 --> 00:00:32,960
It's making my eyes go all blurry.
12
00:00:32,960 --> 00:00:34,960
Are yours?
13
00:00:34,960 --> 00:00:35,960
A bit, yeah.
14
00:00:35,960 --> 00:00:38,960
But it says online it helps.
15
00:00:41,960 --> 00:00:43,960
It's been really helping me out,
that, love. Nice one.
16
00:00:51,960 --> 00:00:55,320
When I wanna roll a spliff,
I don't have to get up now.
17
00:00:55,320 --> 00:00:57,960
HE LAUGHS
Think you're funny, do you?
18
00:00:57,960 --> 00:00:59,480
I do, yeah.
19
00:00:59,480 --> 00:01:01,960
Look, seriously, though, you need
to get back to school today.
20
00:01:01,960 --> 00:01:03,960
You've been off for two weeks.
21
00:01:03,960 --> 00:01:06,960
OK? I don't need you here
looking after me. I'm fine.
22
00:01:06,960 --> 00:01:09,160
Right, I'm going for a number two.
23
00:01:09,160 --> 00:01:11,960
Argh!
24
00:01:14,480 --> 00:01:16,960
HE LAUGHS
Fuck off!
25
00:01:16,960 --> 00:01:18,960
I'm sorry, love.
26
00:01:26,960 --> 00:01:28,320
Look at his hair.
27
00:01:30,960 --> 00:01:33,960
Look at the way his chin
kinda points upwards.
28
00:01:36,800 --> 00:01:40,000
Look at the way he desperately wants
to hire a gardener.
29
00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:41,960
BOYS LAUGH
30
00:01:41,960 --> 00:01:43,960
Look at the way his face
is telling me he owns a painting
31
00:01:43,960 --> 00:01:45,800
of his great-great-grandad.
32
00:01:45,800 --> 00:01:47,960
THEY LAUGH
33
00:01:47,960 --> 00:01:50,960
Lad, I'm only messing, lad.
You seem all right for a posh boy.
34
00:01:50,960 --> 00:01:52,320
You seem all right
for Reece's cousin.
35
00:01:52,320 --> 00:01:53,960
I thought you were gonna turn up
36
00:01:53,960 --> 00:01:55,960
with six Primark bags
and three kids.
37
00:01:55,960 --> 00:01:57,960
My missus
doesn't let me see me the kids
38
00:01:57,960 --> 00:01:59,960
since I got caught robbing
from Primark.
39
00:01:59,960 --> 00:02:00,960
Ooh.
40
00:02:03,800 --> 00:02:04,960
I'm having you on, you div!
41
00:02:04,960 --> 00:02:08,000
THEY LAUGH
Had you going there, lad.
42
00:02:08,000 --> 00:02:10,960
Yeah, don't worry, sis.
43
00:02:10,960 --> 00:02:13,000
He's gonna be fine here with me
for the week, yeah.
44
00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:16,960
I'll make sure
he stays out of trouble. Exactly.
45
00:02:16,960 --> 00:02:18,960
Best to get him away
from those bad-influence,
46
00:02:18,960 --> 00:02:24,160
scumbag, thieving, feral, awful,
dirty mates of his, yeah.
47
00:02:24,160 --> 00:02:25,960
Yeah, yeah. No.
48
00:02:25,960 --> 00:02:27,960
We all know he wouldn't have stolen
it if it wasn't for them.
49
00:02:27,960 --> 00:02:31,960
Get on this, lads. When I was
on my own before, I took these.
50
00:02:31,960 --> 00:02:34,960
I was coming back from the shop,
and there was a delivery van,
51
00:02:34,960 --> 00:02:36,960
and when the fella took a parcel
into the house,
52
00:02:36,960 --> 00:02:37,960
I jumped into the back
and nabbed 'em.
53
00:02:37,960 --> 00:02:40,960
You can always tell which ones
are the new iPhones
54
00:02:40,960 --> 00:02:45,960
because they come in a box
that's rectangle... like an iPhone.
55
00:02:45,960 --> 00:02:47,960
Your lucky day, lads!
56
00:02:47,960 --> 00:02:50,960
Santa, me!
I haven't got one for you, mate,
57
00:02:50,960 --> 00:02:52,480
but you've probably got one,
haven't you?
58
00:02:52,480 --> 00:02:55,000
I actually don't, cos I employ
"ye ma" to text for me.
59
00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:58,480
THEY LAUGH
60
00:03:00,960 --> 00:03:02,960
What, you want me
to freeze my tits off?
61
00:03:02,960 --> 00:03:05,960
No, don't worry.
I won't say a word to my mum.
62
00:03:05,960 --> 00:03:08,960
She knows exactly how important
your reputation is to your career.
63
00:03:08,960 --> 00:03:10,960
And our Reece, yeah.
64
00:03:10,960 --> 00:03:13,960
No, he won't say a word, even though
he can be a right blabbermouth.
65
00:03:13,960 --> 00:03:16,960
OK, honey, all right.
Love you, bye!
66
00:03:19,960 --> 00:03:23,960
Mum, are you sitting down?
Cos you're not gonna believe this.
67
00:03:23,960 --> 00:03:26,960
Our Tyreece,
he's been caught shoplifting again!
68
00:03:26,960 --> 00:03:28,960
Yes, I know, Mum, it's shocking!
69
00:03:28,960 --> 00:03:31,960
He's on his final warning, mm-hm.
70
00:03:31,960 --> 00:03:34,960
It's Steph's fault. She's completely
lost control of him.
71
00:03:34,960 --> 00:03:37,320
She's lost the dressing room, Mum!
72
00:03:38,960 --> 00:03:41,960
Hey! One and you're through!
73
00:03:41,960 --> 00:03:44,960
For any newcomers,
here's the rules...
74
00:03:44,960 --> 00:03:45,960
There are no rules.
75
00:03:49,960 --> 00:03:51,960
Argh! Argh!
76
00:03:51,960 --> 00:03:53,320
Bit hard that, Pat.
77
00:03:54,960 --> 00:03:56,960
Brexit means Brexit, Connor.
78
00:03:59,960 --> 00:04:03,640
'It's making
my eyes go all blurry. Are yours?'
79
00:04:04,960 --> 00:04:05,960
There she is now!
80
00:04:07,960 --> 00:04:09,960
She got no shame?
81
00:04:10,960 --> 00:04:12,960
Yo!
82
00:04:12,960 --> 00:04:15,960
She's been off for, like, two weeks.
Rat, her, like.
83
00:04:15,960 --> 00:04:17,960
Wrong 'un.
84
00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:23,800
You heard what she said about my ma?
I'd be mortified if I was her.
85
00:04:25,960 --> 00:04:29,960
Thus bescreened in night,
so stumblest upon my counsel?
86
00:04:29,960 --> 00:04:32,960
By a name I know not
how to tell thee who I am.
87
00:04:32,960 --> 00:04:35,960
SLOW CLAPPING
88
00:04:35,960 --> 00:04:37,160
POSH ACCENT:
Splendid, Grace, darling.
89
00:04:37,160 --> 00:04:40,960
You used so many techniques
all in one line.
90
00:04:40,960 --> 00:04:42,960
IN OWN ACCENT:
Although you forgot the technique
91
00:04:42,960 --> 00:04:44,960
where you bend over and stick
your head up your own arse.
92
00:04:44,960 --> 00:04:46,160
LAUGHTER
93
00:04:46,160 --> 00:04:49,640
Christopher, I love the choice
you've made to play Romeo
94
00:04:49,640 --> 00:04:50,960
like a gormless prick.
95
00:04:50,960 --> 00:04:54,960
That's right, I'm back, bitches.
The Juliet OG.
96
00:04:54,960 --> 00:04:58,000
The big dog's back.
I'm really glad you're back, Aimee.
97
00:04:58,000 --> 00:05:01,960
It takes a lot of courage to return
after what you did.
98
00:05:01,960 --> 00:05:05,960
Off you pop, pouty.
Let me show you how Juliet's done.
99
00:05:06,960 --> 00:05:07,960
Go 'ead, girl!
100
00:05:09,960 --> 00:05:12,960
Art thou not, Romeo, a Montague
101
00:05:12,960 --> 00:05:15,960
and the coward who believeth
that I would be'est so horrible
102
00:05:15,960 --> 00:05:17,640
as to posteth a TikTok video
103
00:05:17,640 --> 00:05:18,960
slagging off everyone
in this school?
104
00:05:18,960 --> 00:05:20,960
That's not...
Can we just do the scene?
105
00:05:22,960 --> 00:05:27,960
Aimee! Whilst you've been away,
everyone's been working really hard.
106
00:05:27,960 --> 00:05:29,960
I need to know your head's
in the right place.
107
00:05:29,960 --> 00:05:32,960
Er, that's discrimination,
that, sir.
108
00:05:32,960 --> 00:05:34,960
She's clearly got
some kind of mental health issues.
109
00:05:34,960 --> 00:05:36,960
Do you not believe
in mental health, sir?
110
00:05:36,960 --> 00:05:39,960
Love creating mental health stigma,
do you, sir?
111
00:05:39,960 --> 00:05:41,800
Can't see it so doesn't exist, sir?
112
00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:42,960
Your dad told you to man up
113
00:05:42,960 --> 00:05:44,960
so you've suppressed your emotions
all your life, sir?
114
00:05:44,960 --> 00:05:46,960
You wanna lock her in an asylum
like it's the 1950s
115
00:05:46,960 --> 00:05:48,960
instead of helping her, sir?
No!
116
00:05:48,960 --> 00:05:50,160
STIFLED LAUGHTER
117
00:05:50,160 --> 00:05:52,960
Done a course.
118
00:05:52,960 --> 00:05:55,800
Because of your 1950s attitude, sir?
119
00:05:55,800 --> 00:06:00,960
No! Just... Just try
to get better quickly, please.
120
00:06:03,640 --> 00:06:05,960
But also in your own time.
121
00:06:05,960 --> 00:06:08,960
Your recovery is the most important
thing, so...
122
00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:12,960
But also, it is opening night
on Wednesday, so...
123
00:06:16,320 --> 00:06:17,480
Hey!
124
00:06:17,480 --> 00:06:19,960
Are you actually all right,
though, girl?
125
00:06:22,480 --> 00:06:24,960
Where is it?
126
00:06:26,960 --> 00:06:28,960
I still find it mad
that she was from Liverpool
127
00:06:28,960 --> 00:06:30,960
but managed to produce
such a floppy-haired, posh meff.
128
00:06:30,960 --> 00:06:33,960
Nobody else has been in my room!
129
00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:35,000
but you might get a bird in there
one day.
130
00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:37,960
You were the only person
that knew where I kept it!
131
00:06:37,960 --> 00:06:39,960
Maybe Pat knew?
132
00:06:39,960 --> 00:06:42,480
Don't rule her out,
she's desperate for cash.
133
00:06:42,480 --> 00:06:43,960
She offered herself sexually to me.
134
00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:45,960
We couldn't agree on a price,
though,
135
00:06:45,960 --> 00:06:48,320
cos, you see,
I wanted a kiss on the lips,
136
00:06:48,320 --> 00:06:49,960
but she was worried
such a degree of intimacy
137
00:06:49,960 --> 00:06:51,960
might turn us into a relationship.
138
00:06:51,960 --> 00:06:54,960
It's not funny! You know how much
that ring means to me.
139
00:06:54,960 --> 00:06:57,480
Oh, my God!
Is that what you think of me?
140
00:06:57,480 --> 00:06:58,960
What do you want me to think
when you do this?
141
00:06:58,960 --> 00:07:00,960
I stuck my neck on the line for you.
142
00:07:00,960 --> 00:07:02,160
Do you think anyone
would have been mates
143
00:07:04,960 --> 00:07:07,960
Oh, here, take my watch, too,
as long as we can still be mates!
144
00:07:07,960 --> 00:07:09,960
I could never be mates
with someone like you.
145
00:07:09,960 --> 00:07:12,640
It was never gonna work, lad.
Like Vardys and Rooneys.
146
00:07:12,640 --> 00:07:13,960
Scousers and Mancs.
147
00:07:13,960 --> 00:07:16,960
Normal lads
and posh helmets like you!
148
00:07:21,960 --> 00:07:23,960
Get on the other side of the road,
you muppet!
149
00:07:34,960 --> 00:07:36,960
I'm a bellend.
150
00:07:36,960 --> 00:07:40,160
Don't you mean
"I'm a complete bellend"?
151
00:07:41,960 --> 00:07:42,960
Aimee.
152
00:07:42,960 --> 00:07:44,160
Morris.
153
00:07:45,000 --> 00:07:46,960
What will she do?
154
00:07:46,960 --> 00:07:49,480
Worry about
what the dickheads think of her?
155
00:07:49,480 --> 00:07:52,960
Or show them the amazing actress
she really is?
156
00:07:52,960 --> 00:07:56,160
Will there be dirty looks
from those watching?
157
00:07:56,160 --> 00:07:57,960
Probably.
158
00:07:57,960 --> 00:08:02,000
Or will she give
a stunning performance?
159
00:08:02,000 --> 00:08:04,960
Definitely.
160
00:08:04,960 --> 00:08:07,960
Oh, Aims, I always know
when you're not all right.
161
00:08:07,960 --> 00:08:10,960
We know the truth, so who cares
what everyone else thinks?
162
00:08:10,960 --> 00:08:13,640
Don't hide. Just do this for you.
163
00:08:13,640 --> 00:08:15,960
Or option two,
I'll just make a TikTok video
164
00:08:15,960 --> 00:08:19,000
slagging everyone off,
and I will destroy lives.
165
00:08:19,000 --> 00:08:22,960
Takes the heat off you, innit?
166
00:08:22,960 --> 00:08:26,480
OK, but option two's always there
if you do change your mind, girl.
167
00:08:26,480 --> 00:08:27,960
THEY CHUCKLE
168
00:08:27,960 --> 00:08:29,960
I'm passing the phone to the boy
169
00:08:29,960 --> 00:08:31,960
who's the face
of the Stop The Boats campaign.
170
00:08:31,960 --> 00:08:33,960
I'm passing the phone
to the lad who's so posh,
171
00:08:33,960 --> 00:08:36,960
he thinks he has to apologise
for British colonisation.
172
00:08:36,960 --> 00:08:40,000
I am so sorry
for my ancestors' behaviour.
173
00:08:40,000 --> 00:08:42,960
I'm passing the phone
to the lad who, unlike me,
174
00:08:42,960 --> 00:08:46,640
can't tell the difference between
a dessert spoon or a teaspoon.
175
00:08:46,640 --> 00:08:49,960
I'm passing the phone
to the lad who, when he was 12,
176
00:08:49,960 --> 00:08:52,480
got caught by his auntie
wanking to Jasmine off Aladdin.
177
00:08:52,480 --> 00:08:54,960
THEY LAUGH
What's funny?
178
00:08:54,960 --> 00:08:56,960
A whole new world!
179
00:08:56,960 --> 00:09:00,960
A new fantastic point of view!
180
00:09:00,960 --> 00:09:01,960
THEY LAUGH
181
00:09:01,960 --> 00:09:04,800
Nah, Tyreece got us doing
the pass-the-phone challenge.
182
00:09:04,800 --> 00:09:05,960
Oh, sound. Let's go again.
183
00:09:08,960 --> 00:09:10,800
Yeah.
184
00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:12,960
I've gotta go for my tea anyway.
Lad, you are sick!
185
00:09:12,960 --> 00:09:15,960
THEY LAUGH
186
00:09:15,960 --> 00:09:17,800
Ah!
Come on, Ted.
187
00:09:17,800 --> 00:09:19,000
Can I come yours, Ted?
See you in a bit, lad.
188
00:09:19,000 --> 00:09:20,320
Oh, nice one, man.
189
00:09:20,320 --> 00:09:22,160
I'll see you in a bit, lad, yeah?
190
00:09:23,960 --> 00:09:25,480
They new webs, lad?
191
00:09:26,480 --> 00:09:29,960
Yeah, I treated myself. I've endured
a very stressful time recently.
192
00:09:29,960 --> 00:09:31,960
Haven't you just been
on a skiing trip?
193
00:09:31,960 --> 00:09:33,960
Two-hour delay on the way back, lad.
194
00:09:36,960 --> 00:09:37,960
Is that a new jacket?
195
00:09:37,960 --> 00:09:40,960
What, you like it? It's like yours
but a better version.
196
00:09:41,960 --> 00:09:44,960
You took his ring, didn't you?
What did you do, pawn it?
197
00:09:44,960 --> 00:09:47,320
It was worth 500 quid! Buzzing.
198
00:09:47,320 --> 00:09:50,160
Lad, it was his mum's ring.
She died.
199
00:09:50,160 --> 00:09:51,960
Well, that's bang on,
that is, innit,
200
00:09:51,960 --> 00:09:53,960
but a ring's
not gonna bring her back.
201
00:09:56,960 --> 00:09:57,960
I sold it for 50 quid.
202
00:09:57,960 --> 00:10:00,960
Acceptance, mate.
One of the stages of grief.
203
00:10:00,960 --> 00:10:03,640
Well, lad, he thinks it was me.
So we're taking your stuff back.
204
00:10:03,640 --> 00:10:05,960
Nah, are we fuck! I'm well within
my rights to have all this stuff.
205
00:10:05,960 --> 00:10:07,960
He probably gets new clobber
every week.
206
00:10:07,960 --> 00:10:10,960
He's not as rich as you think he is.
Why do you think he's here?
207
00:10:10,960 --> 00:10:13,640
Yeah, well, he defo thinks
he's better than us.
208
00:10:13,640 --> 00:10:15,960
Are you two bezzies or something?
209
00:10:15,960 --> 00:10:18,960
Oh! I thought I seen you two
giving each other the eyes,
210
00:10:18,960 --> 00:10:19,960
the pre-bum eyes.
211
00:10:19,960 --> 00:10:21,960
Are you mad? You're on a caution.
212
00:10:21,960 --> 00:10:24,960
Aw. Reckon he's gonna make you
wear a condom tonight now, lad?
213
00:10:24,960 --> 00:10:26,960
Lad, I'm being serious!
214
00:10:26,960 --> 00:10:29,960
Look, are we just gonna sit back
and let the rich get richer?
215
00:10:29,960 --> 00:10:31,480
Isn't your ma
some marketing manager?
216
00:10:31,480 --> 00:10:32,960
Deputy marketing manager!
217
00:10:32,960 --> 00:10:34,800
And what are you
bringing that up for?
218
00:10:34,800 --> 00:10:36,160
You know she was in bits
when she didn't get it.
219
00:10:38,960 --> 00:10:43,000
But I was planning
a little a la carte dining session
220
00:10:43,000 --> 00:10:45,960
at Bella Italia, on me,
if you want, lad?
221
00:10:45,960 --> 00:10:47,960
Nah. You're giving it to me.
222
00:10:47,960 --> 00:10:51,960
Cos then I've gotta find another
250 quid to buy it back for him.
223
00:10:51,960 --> 00:10:53,960
Yeah. You probably need
a bit more on top of that, like.
224
00:10:53,960 --> 00:10:56,960
It's how the pawn shop
makes their money.
225
00:10:56,960 --> 00:10:58,960
Yeah, I know, lad.
226
00:11:15,960 --> 00:11:17,480
Hang on a minute, here y'are.
227
00:11:17,480 --> 00:11:18,960
Here!
228
00:11:18,960 --> 00:11:20,960
What the fuck
do you want 300 quid for?
229
00:11:22,960 --> 00:11:26,000
Sixth formers only, dickhead.
230
00:11:27,960 --> 00:11:29,960
But I'm offering you
a first-look deal
231
00:11:29,960 --> 00:11:31,960
on coming round
for my ma's teas for two months,
232
00:11:31,960 --> 00:11:33,320
no Mo or Ted.
233
00:11:33,320 --> 00:11:34,960
It's an enticing offer...
234
00:11:34,960 --> 00:11:38,640
Erm, I accidentally broke
Ted's laptop,
235
00:11:38,640 --> 00:11:41,640
and he said I need to buy him
a new one.
236
00:11:41,640 --> 00:11:42,960
Ted, babe! Come here.
237
00:11:42,960 --> 00:11:45,800
Money talks, mm-hm...
238
00:11:45,800 --> 00:11:46,960
Money talks...
239
00:11:46,960 --> 00:11:48,960
300 quid, I'm gonna need a nude.
240
00:11:48,960 --> 00:11:51,160
Yeah?
Come here.
241
00:11:53,480 --> 00:11:56,960
Like I could accidently bury
your head in this bolognese sauce.
242
00:11:56,960 --> 00:11:57,960
Mum?
243
00:11:57,960 --> 00:11:59,960
Do you feel me?
Yeah!
244
00:11:59,960 --> 00:12:01,960
Money talks...
245
00:12:01,960 --> 00:12:03,960
Vile.
246
00:12:03,960 --> 00:12:05,960
Fuck off, lad.
247
00:12:05,960 --> 00:12:07,960
Say hi to your ma.
248
00:12:07,960 --> 00:12:09,960
Fixed it.
249
00:12:09,960 --> 00:12:11,960
How am I gonna get a nude
off my own ma?
250
00:12:11,960 --> 00:12:12,960
That's your problem, mate.
251
00:12:14,960 --> 00:12:18,960
Money talks, mm-hm
Money talks...
252
00:12:18,960 --> 00:12:20,960
Gutted!
253
00:12:33,960 --> 00:12:36,160
'Ah, you're gonna be
amazing tonight, girl.'
254
00:12:36,160 --> 00:12:37,960
Are you sure it's gonna be OK?
255
00:12:37,960 --> 00:12:39,960
'Trust me,
you're gonna absolutely smash it
256
00:12:39,960 --> 00:12:41,960
'cos you're
my little Janet Jackson.'
257
00:12:43,960 --> 00:12:46,640
'Anyways, I'd better finish
my make-up.
258
00:12:46,640 --> 00:12:48,960
'I'll see you soon,
and don't worry, girl.'
259
00:12:48,960 --> 00:12:50,960
Thanks, girl. I'll see you later.
260
00:13:01,960 --> 00:13:03,640
Dad! I'm going now.
261
00:13:05,960 --> 00:13:07,960
SHE SIGHS
Dickhead!
262
00:13:17,960 --> 00:13:20,000
Sir, she's coming! Chill your boots.
263
00:13:20,000 --> 00:13:23,640
'I'm sorry, but the
person you called is not available.'
264
00:13:24,960 --> 00:13:26,960
Sitting off in a pub?
Is she having a laugh?
265
00:13:26,960 --> 00:13:29,960
Aw. It's not surprising.
266
00:13:29,960 --> 00:13:31,960
Poor girl's got issues.
267
00:13:31,960 --> 00:13:34,000
Let's just hope
she doesn't turn into a drunkard.
268
00:13:36,160 --> 00:13:39,480
Hey... did you just hear that?
269
00:13:39,480 --> 00:13:41,800
The gimp who hacked Aimee's TikTok
270
00:13:41,800 --> 00:13:43,960
called Lucy Gill
a drunkard in the video. So?
271
00:13:43,960 --> 00:13:46,960
Well, not many people in this school
would use that word, love.
272
00:13:46,960 --> 00:13:49,960
They'd just say,
"Pisshead, her, like."
273
00:13:49,960 --> 00:13:51,960
Hey... Grace.
274
00:13:51,960 --> 00:13:54,480
Do you know,
it looks like you're right, girl.
275
00:13:54,480 --> 00:13:56,960
Aims has got issues,
and she's let us down.
276
00:13:56,960 --> 00:13:58,960
Mr Dunn's asked, would you stand in
and be our Juliet?
277
00:13:58,960 --> 00:14:00,960
Oh! Oh, my God!
278
00:14:00,960 --> 00:14:03,960
I will, for all of us.
279
00:14:03,960 --> 00:14:05,960
Nice one. Hey, do you want me
to take a pic of you?
280
00:14:05,960 --> 00:14:07,960
Aw, our new Juliet.
281
00:14:08,960 --> 00:14:11,960
Hey! Excuse me, what are you doing?
282
00:14:11,960 --> 00:14:14,480
LOCK CLICKS
Give me my phone back!
283
00:14:14,480 --> 00:14:16,960
MUFFLED: Excuse me!
This is illegal, you know!
284
00:14:18,800 --> 00:14:20,960
'and her mum
is a drunkard crackhead...' Eeh!
285
00:14:20,960 --> 00:14:23,960
..but the most tragic thing about
her is...' Oh, watch what happens!
286
00:14:23,960 --> 00:14:26,960
Hey! It was you!
287
00:14:26,960 --> 00:14:28,960
The video's on your phone,
you little scruff!
288
00:14:28,960 --> 00:14:32,000
She's completely just made that up!
Another one lost the plot.
289
00:14:32,960 --> 00:14:34,960
You coming to get her, posh bellend?
290
00:14:34,960 --> 00:14:37,960
I mean, I don't get it,
but for some reason, she likes you.
291
00:14:37,960 --> 00:14:39,960
I think I'm the last person
she wants to see.
292
00:14:39,960 --> 00:14:42,000
I mean, you are right, love,
but she's only upset with you
293
00:14:42,000 --> 00:14:43,960
because she likes you.
294
00:14:45,960 --> 00:14:49,960
But, like, I really, really
do not get what she sees in you.
295
00:14:49,960 --> 00:14:50,960
Thanks.
296
00:14:51,960 --> 00:14:54,960
HE LAUGHS,
APPLAUSE
297
00:14:54,960 --> 00:14:56,960
He's back!
298
00:14:56,960 --> 00:14:57,960
Bloody hell!
299
00:14:57,960 --> 00:14:58,960
We don't see you for ages,
300
00:14:58,960 --> 00:15:00,960
and you come back
looking like death's door Elvis!
301
00:15:00,960 --> 00:15:02,960
LAUGHTER
302
00:15:02,960 --> 00:15:05,000
Aw, listen, I'm sorry, everyone.
303
00:15:05,000 --> 00:15:08,480
I'm sorry I haven't been doing
my regular slot for a while.
304
00:15:08,480 --> 00:15:11,480
It's just... Well, I had a bit
of bad news, to be honest with you.
305
00:15:11,480 --> 00:15:12,960
Aww.
Yeah.
306
00:15:12,960 --> 00:15:15,960
I was diagnosed
with primary progressive MS.
307
00:15:15,960 --> 00:15:16,960
It's all right.
308
00:15:16,960 --> 00:15:18,960
We had a Johnny Cash tribute
in here. Amazing.
309
00:15:18,960 --> 00:15:20,000
It's like being in the room
with him.
310
00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:21,160
LAUGHTER
311
00:15:21,160 --> 00:15:23,960
WOMAN: And your act was getting
quite a bit boring, mate.
312
00:15:23,960 --> 00:15:25,160
Quite a bit boring, Barbara?
313
00:15:25,160 --> 00:15:26,960
Well, no-one forces you
to come, love!
314
00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:28,960
LAUGHTER
315
00:15:28,960 --> 00:15:30,960
Oh, do you know what?
316
00:15:30,960 --> 00:15:32,960
One of you said to me there
in the toilet,
317
00:15:32,960 --> 00:15:34,960
"I thought you were dead, lad."
318
00:15:34,960 --> 00:15:38,960
I'll be honest with you.
Sometimes, it's felt like that.
319
00:15:38,960 --> 00:15:39,960
So sorry, lad.
320
00:15:40,960 --> 00:15:43,960
But see that beauty there?
That's our Aimee.
321
00:15:43,960 --> 00:15:47,960
She's been the strong one
through all this, not me.
322
00:15:47,960 --> 00:15:49,960
She sorted me some weed,
323
00:15:49,960 --> 00:15:51,960
which, you know,
really helps with the pain,
324
00:15:51,960 --> 00:15:55,960
and... she, er... she even made me
this walking cane.
325
00:15:56,960 --> 00:16:00,320
But I refuse to use it because then
it's like all this is real.
326
00:16:02,800 --> 00:16:05,960
I wanna be the man of house
and take care of her,
327
00:16:05,960 --> 00:16:09,160
but now I've got these fears
that my body's gonna let me down.
328
00:16:12,960 --> 00:16:14,960
And I don't wanna let you down,
love.
329
00:16:18,960 --> 00:16:20,960
Right. Give me that.
330
00:16:20,960 --> 00:16:22,960
I also got him the weed
to make him sleepy,
331
00:16:22,960 --> 00:16:25,320
because when he's awake,
he does my head in.
332
00:16:25,320 --> 00:16:26,960
LAUGHTER
333
00:16:26,960 --> 00:16:28,960
Is there any need for you?
334
00:16:28,960 --> 00:16:31,960
I've just been pouring
my bloody heart out here!
335
00:16:31,960 --> 00:16:33,960
Have you got any idea
what it's like living with you?
336
00:16:33,960 --> 00:16:37,960
Every time I try and help, he moans.
Tell 'em all about that.
337
00:16:37,960 --> 00:16:40,000
That's cos
I don't want your help, love.
338
00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:41,960
And I don't want to be helping you
339
00:16:41,960 --> 00:16:44,960
off the bathroom floor at 4am
cos you fell.
340
00:16:44,960 --> 00:16:46,960
I wanna be helping Mia-Louise
into bed at 4am
341
00:16:46,960 --> 00:16:49,960
cos she's pissed out of her face
after a boss night with me.
342
00:16:49,960 --> 00:16:50,960
Oh!
343
00:16:50,960 --> 00:16:53,960
I don't want to be missing school
because I'm walking around shops
344
00:16:53,960 --> 00:16:55,960
looking for fennel seeds
cos you can't shit.
345
00:16:57,960 --> 00:17:00,000
I wanna be in school,
enjoying myself.
346
00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:03,960
But I help you because I love you.
347
00:17:03,960 --> 00:17:05,960
Aw.
348
00:17:05,960 --> 00:17:09,960
So we need to deal with it together,
the best that we can.
349
00:17:09,960 --> 00:17:12,640
I get it, love, I do. I get it.
350
00:17:12,640 --> 00:17:14,960
Look... can I have my hug now?
351
00:17:16,960 --> 00:17:19,960
Cos you can start with listening
to me about using this cane.
352
00:17:19,960 --> 00:17:21,960
Cane! Cane! Cane!
353
00:17:21,960 --> 00:17:25,960
Cane! Cane!
Cane! Cane! Cane! Cane!
354
00:17:25,960 --> 00:17:29,160
Cane! Cane! Cane! Cane!
Cane! Cane! Cane! Cane!
355
00:17:29,160 --> 00:17:32,640
All right! All right, OK, OK.
Oh!
356
00:17:32,640 --> 00:17:33,960
I'll give it a go.
357
00:17:33,960 --> 00:17:35,960
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
358
00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:39,960
Hey, it's not bad, that.
359
00:17:39,960 --> 00:17:41,960
Getting Willy Wonka vibes, though.
360
00:17:41,960 --> 00:17:44,960
Willy Wanker vibes!
361
00:17:47,960 --> 00:17:49,960
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
362
00:17:49,960 --> 00:17:51,960
I love you.
363
00:18:02,960 --> 00:18:06,480
MS. M&S is Marks & Spencer.
All right, smart arse.
364
00:18:06,480 --> 00:18:09,000
Oh, I'm sorry to hear about that,
Wayno, love.
365
00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:12,960
Hey, come on. Tell me all about it.
Mine's a vodka and Coke. A double.
366
00:18:14,960 --> 00:18:16,960
You may have ruined your chance
to be Juliet,
367
00:18:16,960 --> 00:18:19,960
but if they're looking to cast
a Scouse Florence Nightingale,
368
00:18:19,960 --> 00:18:20,960
you're their girl.
369
00:18:20,960 --> 00:18:22,640
Who's Florence Nightingale?
370
00:18:22,640 --> 00:18:25,960
She was this nurse who, during...
371
00:18:25,960 --> 00:18:29,000
Look, I'm sorry we doubted you
about the TikTok video.
372
00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:31,160
We found out it was Grace
that hacked you.
373
00:18:31,160 --> 00:18:33,160
I suppose it makes sense.
374
00:18:33,160 --> 00:18:34,960
It's just,
you were acting so strange.
375
00:18:34,960 --> 00:18:36,640
Why didn't you say something?
376
00:18:36,640 --> 00:18:38,960
It's not exactly the best
conversation-starter, is it?
377
00:18:38,960 --> 00:18:42,480
"Hey, my dad's got MS, and I have
no idea how to handle it."
378
00:18:42,480 --> 00:18:44,960
I don't know if there is
a right way to handle it,
379
00:18:44,960 --> 00:18:46,320
but you could try talking to me.
380
00:18:50,960 --> 00:18:52,960
Look, you know the only reason
why I get away with being Romeo
381
00:18:52,960 --> 00:18:54,960
is because you're so good,
382
00:18:54,960 --> 00:18:56,960
you make me feel
like I'm in the moment.
383
00:18:56,960 --> 00:18:59,960
It's too late. The play has started.
384
00:18:59,960 --> 00:19:03,640
There'll be other plays.
Just promise me you'll do them.
385
00:19:03,640 --> 00:19:04,960
I promise.
386
00:19:06,960 --> 00:19:08,960
This one's for you, Barbie.
387
00:19:08,960 --> 00:19:11,960
Lord Almighty
I feel my temperature rising...
388
00:19:11,960 --> 00:19:13,960
Come on, everybody!
Uh-huh-huh.
389
00:19:13,960 --> 00:19:14,960
LAUGHTER
390
00:19:16,640 --> 00:19:18,800
PHONE CHIMES
391
00:19:28,800 --> 00:19:30,960
I knew it was you.
What's wrong with you?
392
00:19:30,960 --> 00:19:33,960
Reece, get out here! I've been
looking for you, you slippery shite!
393
00:19:36,960 --> 00:19:38,960
What were you doing on Monday,
you thieving toerag?
394
00:19:41,960 --> 00:19:43,960
Because someone saw you
scuttling back to our house
395
00:19:43,960 --> 00:19:45,960
like the rat you are!
What else have you stole?
396
00:19:45,960 --> 00:19:47,960
Nothing!
Mum, it wasn't me! I swear to God!
397
00:19:47,960 --> 00:19:49,960
Then how come you're wearing
the same jacket
398
00:19:49,960 --> 00:19:52,480
as the lad on the CCTV footage?
399
00:19:52,480 --> 00:19:55,960
The CCTV footage I've just had
the fucking joy of watching
400
00:19:55,960 --> 00:19:57,000
down the police station!
401
00:19:58,960 --> 00:19:59,960
It's probably a coincidence!
402
00:19:59,960 --> 00:20:01,960
I don't believe
in coincidences, lad,
403
00:20:01,960 --> 00:20:03,960
but I do believe
in thieving gobshites!
404
00:20:07,960 --> 00:20:09,960
That's what, Reece?
405
00:20:11,960 --> 00:20:12,960
That's me, yeah.
406
00:20:14,960 --> 00:20:17,160
Yeah, you look like that, lad,
407
00:20:17,160 --> 00:20:20,960
because you've just humiliated me
and our little family.
408
00:20:24,000 --> 00:20:25,960
You're unbelievable.
409
00:20:29,960 --> 00:20:33,960
Nice one.
Proper grateful for that, lad.
410
00:20:33,960 --> 00:20:36,640
I don't know why I do it, you know.
I don't wanna hurt anyone.
411
00:20:36,640 --> 00:20:38,960
I know,
but you need to stop it, lad.
412
00:20:38,960 --> 00:20:40,480
You're right, you know, lad.
413
00:20:41,960 --> 00:20:44,960
Hey, look, as a thanks, let me
get you a Domino's.
414
00:20:44,960 --> 00:20:47,960
I've got my ma's credit card
saved to my Google account.
415
00:20:47,960 --> 00:20:49,960
Lad, you can't keep...
416
00:20:50,960 --> 00:20:52,960
Just put some Chicken Kickers
on there, lad.
417
00:20:52,960 --> 00:20:54,160
'Oh, for fuck's sake, Mum!'
418
00:20:54,160 --> 00:20:56,960
Yeah, well, good news
travels fast, don't it?
419
00:20:56,960 --> 00:20:58,960
Who told you?
420
00:20:58,960 --> 00:21:01,960
Steph? Yeah, well, she's not one
to be gossiping, is she?
421
00:21:02,960 --> 00:21:06,960
I have not lost the dressing room,
Mum!
422
00:21:06,960 --> 00:21:09,480
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
423
00:21:10,960 --> 00:21:13,000
BOOING
424
00:21:16,960 --> 00:21:18,960
This is going straight on TikTok.
425
00:21:23,000 --> 00:21:26,480
From now on,
don't come past this line, OK?
426
00:21:26,480 --> 00:21:29,960
And keep YOUR ball on YOUR side!
427
00:21:29,960 --> 00:21:30,960
VAR decision.
428
00:21:30,960 --> 00:21:33,960
Er, still kicks the ball
like a two-year-old.
429
00:21:33,960 --> 00:21:36,960
VAR decision.
Erm, backstabbing thief!
430
00:21:40,960 --> 00:21:42,960
Knobhead!
431
00:21:43,960 --> 00:21:45,960
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432
00:21:46,010 --> 00:21:50,560
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