Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,959 --> 00:00:01,076
h
2
00:00:01,077 --> 00:00:01,193
ht
3
00:00:01,194 --> 00:00:01,311
htt
4
00:00:01,312 --> 00:00:01,429
http
5
00:00:01,430 --> 00:00:01,546
http:
6
00:00:01,547 --> 00:00:01,664
http:/
7
00:00:01,665 --> 00:00:01,782
http://
8
00:00:01,783 --> 00:00:01,899
http://h
9
00:00:01,900 --> 00:00:02,017
http://hi
10
00:00:02,018 --> 00:00:02,134
http://hiq
11
00:00:02,135 --> 00:00:02,252
http://hiqv
12
00:00:02,253 --> 00:00:02,370
http://hiqve
13
00:00:02,371 --> 00:00:02,487
http://hiqve.
14
00:00:02,488 --> 00:00:02,605
http://hiqve.c
15
00:00:02,606 --> 00:00:02,723
http://hiqve.co
16
00:00:02,724 --> 00:00:02,840
http://hiqve.com
17
00:00:02,841 --> 00:00:02,958
http://hiqve.com/
18
00:00:02,959 --> 00:00:05,959
http://hiqve.com/
19
00:00:06,983 --> 00:00:08,359
Guess what.
20
00:00:08,400 --> 00:00:10,653
Oh, nobody guess.
It's always about boobs.
21
00:00:12,822 --> 00:00:14,424
Oh, come on. Don't you want
to know what I have to say?
22
00:00:14,448 --> 00:00:16,075
Man, I never know
what you have to say.
23
00:00:16,117 --> 00:00:17,994
I mean, in your head
you're speaking English
24
00:00:18,036 --> 00:00:20,412
but when it comes out,
it's all buzzes and clicks.
25
00:00:21,789 --> 00:00:23,582
Oh, really?
26
00:00:23,624 --> 00:00:25,543
Well, I guess I was speaking
English to the SATs
27
00:00:25,584 --> 00:00:27,378
because I got 1000 points.
28
00:00:30,589 --> 00:00:32,800
Oh, and last night on cable
I saw four boobs.
29
00:00:36,387 --> 00:00:40,183
Wait. So the SATs are in?
Donna, did you see your scores yet?
30
00:00:40,225 --> 00:00:43,144
Yeah. This morning.
I got 1230.
31
00:00:43,186 --> 00:00:46,772
What? A 1230? That's great.
Why didn't you say something?
32
00:00:46,814 --> 00:00:48,649
Well, I didn't want to brag.
33
00:00:48,691 --> 00:00:50,818
I mean, yeah, I kicked ass,
but it's no big deal.
34
00:00:52,653 --> 00:00:54,405
Eric. Eric, honey.
35
00:00:54,446 --> 00:00:57,616
I got the mail and your SAT
envelope happened to be open,
36
00:00:57,658 --> 00:01:00,370
and the letter just sort of
slid into my hand,
37
00:01:00,411 --> 00:01:03,831
and I accidentally put on my
reading glasses, and I saw your score.
38
00:01:03,873 --> 00:01:05,416
You got an 800!
39
00:01:12,048 --> 00:01:14,592
I got an 800? That's it?
40
00:01:14,633 --> 00:01:16,677
"That's it"?
41
00:01:16,719 --> 00:01:20,348
If 100 is an "A," eight of
them is an A-plus-plus.
42
00:01:22,267 --> 00:01:25,270
No. No, Mrs. Forman,
an 800 is not good.
43
00:01:25,311 --> 00:01:27,521
I mean, a pigeon can peck
a better score than that.
44
00:01:29,274 --> 00:01:32,151
- Really?
- Donna did better. Fez did, too.
45
00:01:32,193 --> 00:01:34,195
And his whole country's
made of bamboo.
46
00:01:35,905 --> 00:01:37,447
This is awkward.
47
00:01:38,908 --> 00:01:40,492
I'll just...
48
00:01:40,534 --> 00:01:42,452
I'll go home
and take down the streamers.
49
00:01:44,956 --> 00:01:46,999
Forman, the SATs prove nothing.
50
00:01:47,041 --> 00:01:49,710
I mean, I got 950, and I
don't even have any textbooks.
51
00:01:50,878 --> 00:01:52,046
Or a locker.
52
00:01:53,131 --> 00:01:55,925
Wait, wait. A 950?
53
00:01:55,967 --> 00:01:57,843
Steven, I knew it.
You do have potential.
54
00:01:59,637 --> 00:02:03,057
Yeah. Imagine what I could do
if I only applied myself.
55
00:02:03,099 --> 00:02:04,600
Oh, well, guess
we'll never know.
56
00:02:06,436 --> 00:02:08,854
I just... I can't believe
I got the lowest score here.
57
00:02:08,896 --> 00:02:10,648
Oh, Eric, someone
had to come in last.
58
00:02:13,525 --> 00:02:15,194
There is no shame in that.
59
00:02:16,279 --> 00:02:17,738
Well, there is a little shame.
60
00:02:19,282 --> 00:02:20,616
Shame on you.
61
00:02:23,161 --> 00:02:24,787
Hey.
62
00:02:24,829 --> 00:02:27,706
You know, who cares what
anyone got? It's just a stupid test.
63
00:02:27,748 --> 00:02:29,959
You know what?
You're right. I don't care.
64
00:02:30,001 --> 00:02:31,752
I got 1030!
65
00:02:35,089 --> 00:02:36,799
Yeah!
66
00:02:40,261 --> 00:02:43,181
I did good on a test, man.
67
00:02:43,222 --> 00:02:45,808
Something's happening to me.
I'm blooming like a flower.
68
00:02:54,650 --> 00:02:58,363
So the SATs proved it.
Donna's the smart one.
69
00:02:58,404 --> 00:03:01,049
Eric, on the other hand... Well, I
don't wanna say there's a dumb one,
70
00:03:01,073 --> 00:03:03,326
but there's two,
and he ain't the smart one.
71
00:03:04,994 --> 00:03:07,497
That's where you're wrong, Bob.
72
00:03:07,579 --> 00:03:11,459
Eric got an A-plus-plus.
73
00:03:13,127 --> 00:03:14,504
Oh, um...
74
00:03:16,797 --> 00:03:18,841
No.
75
00:03:18,883 --> 00:03:23,804
See, Red, it turns out
Eric still did very well.
76
00:03:23,846 --> 00:03:25,973
It's just,
some other people did better.
77
00:03:26,015 --> 00:03:27,557
- Donna?
- Yes.
78
00:03:28,017 --> 00:03:29,810
- Steven?
- Yes.
79
00:03:31,854 --> 00:03:33,356
Not the foreign kid.
80
00:03:35,107 --> 00:03:36,275
Yes.
81
00:03:37,860 --> 00:03:38,986
Kelso?
82
00:03:43,157 --> 00:03:44,367
Yes.
83
00:03:44,409 --> 00:03:46,452
He did worse than Kelso?
84
00:03:48,037 --> 00:03:50,581
I watched that kid
glue his hand to his face.
85
00:03:55,836 --> 00:03:57,547
You.
86
00:03:57,588 --> 00:04:00,591
What happened on the SATs?
87
00:04:00,632 --> 00:04:04,011
Okay, you know
he's not good under pressure.
88
00:04:04,053 --> 00:04:07,181
He can't pee in a public restroom
because there's an audience.
89
00:04:10,560 --> 00:04:12,061
You know what?
This is a family thing.
90
00:04:12,103 --> 00:04:13,271
I'll leave you to it.
91
00:04:16,023 --> 00:04:19,569
- What's wrong with you?
- I don't know. Maybe I'm not smart.
92
00:04:19,610 --> 00:04:22,029
- Who says you're not smart?
- You.
93
00:04:24,823 --> 00:04:27,034
- When?
- Always.
94
00:04:28,827 --> 00:04:31,663
Your problem is
you got your head up your ass.
95
00:04:34,250 --> 00:04:37,587
Your father's afraid that you're
spending a little too much time
96
00:04:37,628 --> 00:04:39,589
on a high school romance.
97
00:04:39,630 --> 00:04:42,883
That's right.
Donna gums up the works.
98
00:04:42,925 --> 00:04:45,553
Whoa. It's not
her fault, okay?
99
00:04:45,595 --> 00:04:49,014
I was prepared for that test.
I had three sharp pencils.
100
00:04:49,056 --> 00:04:50,891
That's one more than
recommended, by the way.
101
00:04:52,684 --> 00:04:55,004
I remember sitting there,
filling out the little bubbles...
102
00:05:17,543 --> 00:05:21,380
- Well, that was a blast.
- Sure was.
103
00:05:21,422 --> 00:05:23,302
Now why don't you point
yourself toward my villa
104
00:05:23,341 --> 00:05:25,343
and park this thing
in my garage?
105
00:05:25,384 --> 00:05:28,720
Oh, I'm planning on that, but
what should I do with the car?
106
00:05:31,015 --> 00:05:34,352
We better hurry.
We only have five minutes.
107
00:05:34,393 --> 00:05:36,312
Well, that's four more
than I need, baby.
108
00:05:41,900 --> 00:05:45,279
I repeat. There's only five
minutes left in this section of the test.
109
00:05:55,122 --> 00:06:00,044
Oh, my God.
Donna does gum up the works.
110
00:06:00,085 --> 00:06:04,340
See? Now use what little brains
you've got and hit the books, dumb ass.
111
00:06:09,761 --> 00:06:11,601
Kelso, what the hell
are you doing with a book?
112
00:06:13,516 --> 00:06:14,808
Reading.
113
00:06:18,187 --> 00:06:19,564
I am reading.
114
00:06:19,605 --> 00:06:22,149
'Cause what good is having
brains if you got nothing up here?
115
00:06:23,942 --> 00:06:25,152
- Hi.
- Hey.
116
00:06:26,529 --> 00:06:28,447
So I saw my dad in prison today.
117
00:06:28,489 --> 00:06:30,241
Oh. How was it?
118
00:06:31,450 --> 00:06:33,035
Well, at first it was a downer
119
00:06:33,077 --> 00:06:36,080
but then I realized that
I'll be okay without my dad.
120
00:06:36,121 --> 00:06:39,709
Because the SATs prove that there's
another man who could take care of me.
121
00:06:41,335 --> 00:06:44,630
You better be
talking about Santa Claus.
122
00:06:44,672 --> 00:06:49,218
No, Steven, I'm talking about
you. Because you have potential.
123
00:06:49,260 --> 00:06:51,761
He doesn't have potential.
I have potential.
124
00:06:53,639 --> 00:06:56,601
Like, I'm reading Moby Dick,
and I'm not even halfway through
125
00:06:56,642 --> 00:06:59,645
and I can already tell you the
ending. The whale is a robot.
126
00:07:06,527 --> 00:07:09,655
Steven, just imagine
what your life would be like
127
00:07:09,697 --> 00:07:11,782
with the love and support
of a good woman.
128
00:07:18,539 --> 00:07:23,544
Oh! Thank God for your strong
SATs. Now we don't have to be poor.
129
00:07:24,545 --> 00:07:26,672
Not poor, indeed.
130
00:07:26,714 --> 00:07:29,174
Basic math and verbal skills
are the ticket to great wealth
131
00:07:29,216 --> 00:07:31,510
and therefore great happiness.
132
00:07:33,929 --> 00:07:36,474
Poor person!
Bring me a fancy cocktail.
133
00:07:39,893 --> 00:07:42,396
It is my privilege
to wait on you, madam.
134
00:07:42,438 --> 00:07:45,190
Oh, quite so, quite so.
135
00:07:45,232 --> 00:07:47,272
All right, enough with the
idle chatter. Go be poor.
136
00:07:52,990 --> 00:07:55,284
Wait. Someone's playing
the harp in the corner?
137
00:07:57,119 --> 00:07:59,664
'Cause if I'm rich,
I'm hiring, like, Jethro Tull.
138
00:08:01,999 --> 00:08:04,960
Who cares? It's the
same thing every time.
139
00:08:05,002 --> 00:08:06,878
I'm a butler, I'm a bellhop,
I'm a stable boy.
140
00:08:06,920 --> 00:08:08,255
Well, I've had enough!
141
00:08:10,215 --> 00:08:13,511
I will not wait on you people
anymore. Got it?
142
00:08:15,929 --> 00:08:16,929
Good.
143
00:08:18,641 --> 00:08:20,351
Now who wants a Popsicle?
144
00:08:23,228 --> 00:08:26,440
Wow. Here's something
I did not know.
145
00:08:26,482 --> 00:08:28,150
They number every page.
146
00:08:34,365 --> 00:08:38,202
Hey. You guys. You know how Red's
always telling me I need to buckle down?
147
00:08:38,243 --> 00:08:40,705
Well, turns out he's right.
I do have to buckle down.
148
00:08:40,746 --> 00:08:42,998
You sure do. He's got an 800.
There's your butler.
149
00:08:46,794 --> 00:08:49,921
Man, how can I ever marry Donna?
150
00:08:49,963 --> 00:08:52,883
I mean, I'm an idiot around her
now, and we're only engaged.
151
00:08:55,260 --> 00:08:56,470
What?
152
00:08:58,930 --> 00:08:59,930
Oops.
153
00:09:01,851 --> 00:09:02,893
You're engaged?
154
00:09:06,021 --> 00:09:07,022
No.
155
00:09:09,650 --> 00:09:11,318
How could you
give her that ring?
156
00:09:11,360 --> 00:09:14,154
You're in high school, man,
and according to the SATs
157
00:09:14,196 --> 00:09:15,989
that's about as far
as you're gonna go.
158
00:09:17,658 --> 00:09:20,369
Look. Just don't tell Donna
I told you, okay?
159
00:09:20,411 --> 00:09:22,747
She'd kill me.
It's supposed to be a secret.
160
00:09:22,788 --> 00:09:24,289
Of course she wants it a secret.
161
00:09:24,331 --> 00:09:26,751
"I'm marrying dumb guy."
Who wants that spread around?
162
00:09:33,048 --> 00:09:35,718
You know, maybe Eric's
bad score is a blessing.
163
00:09:35,760 --> 00:09:37,845
It'll be a good story
when he's a senator.
164
00:09:40,347 --> 00:09:42,433
Senator?
165
00:09:42,474 --> 00:09:44,560
The word you're
looking for is "janitor."
166
00:09:49,106 --> 00:09:52,860
Okay, see? That's why
Eric did so poorly on that test.
167
00:09:52,902 --> 00:09:55,654
It's because
you're too hard on him.
168
00:09:55,696 --> 00:09:58,699
I have to be hard on him
'cause you always baby him.
169
00:09:58,741 --> 00:10:00,618
Because you're so hard on him.
170
00:10:00,659 --> 00:10:02,994
You babied him
before I was hard on him.
171
00:10:03,036 --> 00:10:05,581
You were hard on him
when he was a baby.
172
00:10:08,250 --> 00:10:10,961
Hey, I just found out,
I can take the SATs again.
173
00:10:11,002 --> 00:10:13,422
I'm gonna... I'm gonna take
it again, and I'm gonna nail it.
174
00:10:13,464 --> 00:10:16,675
I just gotta buckle down. I'm
gonna kick a little SAT butt.
175
00:10:16,717 --> 00:10:17,968
- Attaboy!
- Good for you!
176
00:10:20,930 --> 00:10:22,240
- Think he'll do any better?
- Nah.
177
00:10:22,264 --> 00:10:23,474
Yeah.
178
00:10:29,605 --> 00:10:31,982
Hi. What are you doing?
179
00:10:32,023 --> 00:10:33,442
Studying.
180
00:10:33,484 --> 00:10:35,545
I'd love to hang out, but
I've really gotta buckle down.
181
00:10:35,569 --> 00:10:37,738
All right.
Can I raid the fridge?
182
00:10:37,780 --> 00:10:40,574
My dad wrote "Save for Bob"
on all the food at our house.
183
00:10:55,965 --> 00:10:58,634
Oops. I dropped the margarine.
184
00:11:00,093 --> 00:11:01,512
Butterfingers.
185
00:11:04,264 --> 00:11:07,017
It's so slippery I can barely
get my fingers around it.
186
00:11:16,443 --> 00:11:17,653
I gotta go.
187
00:11:20,197 --> 00:11:22,449
- Ground me.
- What?
188
00:11:22,491 --> 00:11:24,719
I am not strong enough. If I'm
gonna shake this Donna thing,
189
00:11:24,743 --> 00:11:27,412
I am gonna need some serious
discipline. Please ground me.
190
00:11:29,247 --> 00:11:30,791
You got it, pal.
191
00:11:31,709 --> 00:11:33,042
You're grounded.
192
00:11:34,252 --> 00:11:35,730
One more thing.
Donna's in the kitchen.
193
00:11:35,754 --> 00:11:37,297
I need you to get
rid of her for me.
194
00:11:37,339 --> 00:11:39,967
- Do I have to be
nice about it?
- No.
195
00:11:40,009 --> 00:11:42,093
This is the happiest day
of my life.
196
00:11:53,564 --> 00:11:55,106
Hey. Hey, Steven. Great news.
197
00:11:55,148 --> 00:11:56,859
I found a couple
of savings bonds
198
00:11:56,901 --> 00:11:59,236
and I can cash them in
to help you pay for college.
199
00:11:59,277 --> 00:12:01,488
- Jackie...
- You're
going to college?
200
00:12:01,530 --> 00:12:03,072
I am so happy!
201
00:12:05,074 --> 00:12:09,078
You were an orphan, and we
took you in, and now look at you.
202
00:12:10,706 --> 00:12:12,290
I'm proud of you.
203
00:12:12,332 --> 00:12:14,626
And that money that
you've been paying in rent?
204
00:12:14,668 --> 00:12:17,337
I put it in a bank account
for college.
205
00:12:17,379 --> 00:12:20,089
Or bail. But this is better.
206
00:12:21,008 --> 00:12:22,801
Okay, enough.
207
00:12:22,843 --> 00:12:25,637
Jackie, college is a waste of
time, and I'm not going, okay?
208
00:12:25,679 --> 00:12:28,473
- So just butt the hell out.
- No. No, Steven,
I won't butt out
209
00:12:28,515 --> 00:12:32,143
because you need to be pushed,
and we need to think about our future.
210
00:12:32,185 --> 00:12:34,897
Look. Even if we have a future,
it's not gonna be what you wanted.
211
00:12:34,939 --> 00:12:36,105
It's gonna be more like...
212
00:12:45,616 --> 00:12:48,786
- Steven, do you think I'm fat?
- I know you're fat.
213
00:12:50,245 --> 00:12:51,455
Go get me a beer.
214
00:13:04,301 --> 00:13:06,595
- Oh, my God.
- Yeah. It ain't pretty.
215
00:13:09,681 --> 00:13:12,851
Please tell me they won't
be living in our basement.
216
00:13:12,893 --> 00:13:14,937
Well, we'll be dead by then.
217
00:13:16,563 --> 00:13:17,689
Oh, good.
218
00:13:24,780 --> 00:13:26,448
You grounded yourself?
219
00:13:28,951 --> 00:13:31,829
What? Why would I do that?
220
00:13:31,870 --> 00:13:34,205
Well, apparently,
I "gum up the works."
221
00:13:37,250 --> 00:13:41,379
Oh, good.
So someone filled you in.
222
00:13:41,421 --> 00:13:44,591
Yeah. Red. When he
kicked me out of your kitchen.
223
00:13:44,633 --> 00:13:46,135
And then he locked
the sliding door,
224
00:13:46,175 --> 00:13:48,137
and stood there
laughing and waving.
225
00:13:52,181 --> 00:13:54,476
Eric, why are you freaking out
about this test?
226
00:13:54,518 --> 00:13:57,521
I'm not. I'm gonna take it
again, and I'm gonna nail it.
227
00:13:57,562 --> 00:13:59,230
Anything less than
a 1240 is unacceptable.
228
00:14:00,565 --> 00:14:02,860
A 1240?
229
00:14:02,901 --> 00:14:05,278
Hmm. That's 10 more
points than I got.
230
00:14:06,071 --> 00:14:07,196
Really? That's weird.
231
00:14:09,033 --> 00:14:11,910
You're threatened because
I got a better score than you.
232
00:14:11,952 --> 00:14:14,079
- I just... I have to do
better than you.
- Why?
233
00:14:14,121 --> 00:14:16,623
Because I'm the man,
and the man's the man,
234
00:14:16,665 --> 00:14:18,416
and that's just the way it is.
235
00:14:23,172 --> 00:14:24,255
What did you say?
236
00:14:27,759 --> 00:14:29,970
I'm grounded.
Dad, Donna's up here!
237
00:14:38,520 --> 00:14:41,106
- That's it.
- What's it?
238
00:14:41,148 --> 00:14:44,317
This chapter just helped me figure out
the answer to you and Donna's problem,
239
00:14:44,359 --> 00:14:46,153
vis-a-vis your crappy score.
240
00:14:47,654 --> 00:14:50,281
"Vis-a-vis"?
241
00:14:50,323 --> 00:14:52,450
It's a PBS word, Eric.
Stay with me here.
242
00:14:54,203 --> 00:14:57,206
Yeah, I liken your situation
to that of Pavlov's dog.
243
00:14:57,288 --> 00:14:59,750
You see,
Pavlov was this science guy,
244
00:14:59,791 --> 00:15:02,252
and every time his dog would
ring a bell, Pavlov would eat.
245
00:15:11,220 --> 00:15:13,263
Are you sure it was the dog
who rang the bell?
246
00:15:14,765 --> 00:15:16,349
Yeah. I mean,
who else would it be?
247
00:15:17,392 --> 00:15:19,853
Pavlov?
248
00:15:19,895 --> 00:15:25,109
Well, that wouldn't be a trick,
Eric. What man can't ring a bell?
249
00:15:25,150 --> 00:15:28,153
Anyway, every time that dog
would ring that bell,
250
00:15:28,195 --> 00:15:29,995
old Pavlov would eat,
and then he would drool.
251
00:15:34,826 --> 00:15:37,871
You just read that chapter
two seconds ago.
252
00:15:37,913 --> 00:15:39,873
- Do you even want my help?
- No!
253
00:15:39,915 --> 00:15:41,291
Your loss!
254
00:15:45,087 --> 00:15:48,548
Okay. So what's wrong
with you and Donna?
255
00:15:48,590 --> 00:15:50,383
She did better than me
on that test,
256
00:15:50,425 --> 00:15:52,385
and I'm sorry, but that
is just not gonna fly,
257
00:15:52,427 --> 00:15:56,223
because I am the man, and the man's
the man, and that's just the way it is.
258
00:15:59,476 --> 00:16:02,479
Well, honey, everybody
has different skills.
259
00:16:02,520 --> 00:16:05,232
I do better on tests
than your father,
260
00:16:05,274 --> 00:16:09,236
but he's the one brave enough
to kill spiders.
261
00:16:09,278 --> 00:16:12,656
And since we've been married,
how many tests have I taken? None.
262
00:16:12,697 --> 00:16:14,908
How many spiders
has your father killed?
263
00:16:14,950 --> 00:16:16,326
Hundreds.
264
00:16:19,163 --> 00:16:21,706
But, Mom, spiders freak me out.
265
00:16:27,254 --> 00:16:29,965
We all have different qualities.
266
00:16:30,007 --> 00:16:33,885
But the thing to remember is
how you do on some silly test
267
00:16:33,927 --> 00:16:37,347
is much less important than
how you behave in real life.
268
00:16:37,388 --> 00:16:40,017
I'll take a dummy
over a jackass any day.
269
00:16:43,270 --> 00:16:45,438
So am I a dummy or a jackass?
270
00:16:46,731 --> 00:16:48,358
Well, honey,
right now you're both.
271
00:16:51,695 --> 00:16:54,823
Okay, Steven, about
your vision of our future
272
00:16:54,865 --> 00:16:57,117
with you swilling beer
and me being fat?
273
00:16:57,159 --> 00:17:00,078
That's not gonna happen,
because I'm not gonna be fat.
274
00:17:00,120 --> 00:17:01,330
It's genetic.
275
00:17:04,666 --> 00:17:06,376
That's true.
276
00:17:06,417 --> 00:17:10,172
Her mother drinks two bottles of
wine a day and she looks damn good.
277
00:17:12,423 --> 00:17:14,384
No, I've seen her vacuum
in her underwear.
278
00:17:17,846 --> 00:17:20,724
- So what's your point?
- My point is
she's freaking hot.
279
00:17:25,687 --> 00:17:27,605
Not you.
280
00:17:27,647 --> 00:17:31,609
Steven, all I'm saying is that I've
become accustomed to a certain lifestyle,
281
00:17:31,651 --> 00:17:34,321
and if you would just
live up to your potential...
282
00:17:34,363 --> 00:17:37,032
I don't know why you're
talking to 950 guy over there.
283
00:17:39,326 --> 00:17:41,870
I got 1030.
I got 80 more potential.
284
00:17:45,249 --> 00:17:47,376
Yeah, but Steven has my heart.
285
00:17:47,417 --> 00:17:49,711
Which is why
I want him to be rich.
286
00:17:49,753 --> 00:17:52,422
I mean, think about all the
stuff you could buy for me.
287
00:17:53,924 --> 00:17:56,009
Jackie,
288
00:17:56,051 --> 00:17:58,571
why don't you earn your own
money and buy those things yourself?
289
00:18:00,513 --> 00:18:01,514
Myself?
290
00:18:04,768 --> 00:18:07,687
And I'm not like Forman. I have no
problem mooching off your success.
291
00:18:10,107 --> 00:18:13,318
You know, you leave the room, I
steal some money from your purse.
292
00:18:13,360 --> 00:18:15,445
You pretend I didn't,
but we both know I did.
293
00:18:17,447 --> 00:18:19,449
That's the future I see for us.
294
00:18:21,243 --> 00:18:23,370
Oh, Steven, that's beautiful.
295
00:18:25,330 --> 00:18:28,125
Oh, wait. So you don't even
care that I did better than him?
296
00:18:29,126 --> 00:18:30,961
Not really.
297
00:18:31,002 --> 00:18:34,172
Well, if being smart isn't gonna
help me impress the chicks
298
00:18:34,214 --> 00:18:35,465
then I want no part of it.
299
00:18:37,926 --> 00:18:41,512
I'm gonna go back to coasting
through life on my good looks.
300
00:18:41,554 --> 00:18:43,598
Hey, and my brains
will always be there,
301
00:18:43,640 --> 00:18:45,767
so if I ever need them,
I'll just whip them out
302
00:18:45,809 --> 00:18:47,729
and use them like a secret
emergency rocket pack.
303
00:18:52,983 --> 00:18:55,583
- That's a good plan, man.
- Hey, it beats
the hell out of reading.
304
00:19:02,409 --> 00:19:04,035
- Okay, Donna, look.
- Don't worry, Eric.
305
00:19:04,077 --> 00:19:05,495
I'm only reading the funnies.
306
00:19:07,456 --> 00:19:10,541
Business section's
for the man, right?
307
00:19:10,583 --> 00:19:14,045
Donna, the thing is,
I'm a jackass and I know it.
308
00:19:15,130 --> 00:19:16,506
Well, I know it, too.
309
00:19:18,675 --> 00:19:23,096
Look. Okay, the only reason
I said what I said is,
310
00:19:23,138 --> 00:19:27,267
you agreed to marry me before
the facts were in, right?
311
00:19:27,309 --> 00:19:30,979
So now I'm thinking
that maybe, you know,
312
00:19:31,021 --> 00:19:32,189
you might want to trade up.
313
00:19:34,107 --> 00:19:35,608
That's so stupid.
314
00:19:37,777 --> 00:19:40,006
Okay, I swear to God, if one
more person calls me stupid today...
315
00:19:40,030 --> 00:19:41,281
Eric.
316
00:19:44,326 --> 00:19:47,871
Eric, my entire life,
317
00:19:47,912 --> 00:19:49,956
everywhere I've gone
and everything I've done
318
00:19:49,998 --> 00:19:52,459
has been better because
you were there with me.
319
00:19:52,501 --> 00:19:54,878
And no test score
is gonna change that.
320
00:19:56,421 --> 00:19:59,341
Wow. That was amazing.
321
00:20:01,259 --> 00:20:03,094
Did you come up
with that yourself?
322
00:20:05,222 --> 00:20:09,809
Well, I saw Mr. Ingalls say it to
Mary on Little House on the Prairie.
323
00:20:09,851 --> 00:20:12,145
I just made it a test score
instead of blindness.
324
00:20:13,813 --> 00:20:15,357
But I still think it's true.
325
00:20:17,317 --> 00:20:20,820
So, you're still glad
we're engaged?
326
00:20:20,862 --> 00:20:22,113
Of course.
327
00:20:23,448 --> 00:20:26,743
Good. Hey,
speaking of Little House,
328
00:20:26,784 --> 00:20:29,579
did you ever see
that one where Laura
329
00:20:29,620 --> 00:20:32,832
accidentally told Kelso, Hyde, Fez and
Jackie that she was engaged to Donna?
330
00:20:35,335 --> 00:20:38,004
Eric, are you kidding me?
331
00:20:38,046 --> 00:20:41,758
God. You can't even
keep a secret?
332
00:20:41,799 --> 00:20:44,928
Hey, Donna, I got an 800. We're
lucky I can wash myself, okay?
333
00:20:54,479 --> 00:20:56,606
Poor person! Where's my drink?
334
00:20:59,109 --> 00:21:01,903
Where's your drink?
What about my drink?
335
00:21:01,945 --> 00:21:04,614
Next time you ask where your
drink is, it will be in your ass.
336
00:21:15,584 --> 00:21:17,627
It's so hard to get good
poor people these days.
337
00:21:17,651 --> 00:21:19,651
http://hiqve.com/
25921
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.