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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,000 --> 00:00:05,640 - Look how good that is. - Yeah! 2 00:00:07,040 --> 00:00:09,360 - OK, who wants an arm wrestle? - I'm playing the winner! 3 00:00:10,880 --> 00:00:12,000 - Aah! - Whoa! 4 00:00:13,040 --> 00:00:14,440 OK, Dad, I'm filming. 5 00:00:15,480 --> 00:00:16,896 SHOUTS: Are you filming, Sam? 6 00:00:16,920 --> 00:00:18,976 Yeah, you're shouting again! 7 00:00:19,000 --> 00:00:22,936 Yeah, it's this flipping ear, it's blocked! It's blocked still! 8 00:00:22,960 --> 00:00:24,256 Yeah. 9 00:00:24,280 --> 00:00:26,256 Can you hurry up, please? 10 00:00:26,280 --> 00:00:27,497 DRUMMING - Robin! 11 00:00:27,521 --> 00:00:29,616 - What? - Ooh, no, hang on, I can hear - I can hear that. 12 00:00:29,640 --> 00:00:31,376 - You can hear that? - Yeah. 13 00:00:31,400 --> 00:00:33,696 Agh, just get on with it, Dad. 14 00:00:33,720 --> 00:00:35,576 - Honestly! - Ha, ha, ha! 15 00:00:35,600 --> 00:00:37,776 OK, ahoy there, shipmates! 16 00:00:37,800 --> 00:00:40,576 It's Captain Long John Paul Jessop here aboard... 17 00:00:40,600 --> 00:00:41,597 ROBIN LAUGHS 18 00:00:41,621 --> 00:00:42,616 - Now, then! - Go on. 19 00:00:42,640 --> 00:00:45,456 - ..my old boat. - Oi. - From when I was a boy! 20 00:00:45,480 --> 00:00:48,816 Yes, and today we're taking it upon the seven seas for the first time 21 00:00:48,840 --> 00:00:51,376 since, er, I want to say, um... When was Babylon Zoo? 22 00:00:51,400 --> 00:00:53,216 It doesn't matter, can you hurry up, please? 23 00:00:53,240 --> 00:00:55,976 I need to get home to set up for the party, for the students. 24 00:00:56,000 --> 00:00:58,456 All right, I'm just waiting for you lot to embark. 25 00:00:58,480 --> 00:01:00,056 - To what? - Embark. 26 00:01:00,080 --> 00:01:01,616 What - what's embark again? 27 00:01:01,640 --> 00:01:04,256 Come aboard, get on the boat, Mum. 28 00:01:04,280 --> 00:01:06,696 Well, turn it on first, see if it works. 29 00:01:06,720 --> 00:01:09,056 - Turn it on? - Yeah. - It's not a Hoover. 30 00:01:09,080 --> 00:01:10,856 - Start her up, I think you mean. - OK. 31 00:01:10,880 --> 00:01:13,656 And you can't wear heels on an inflatable vessel I'm afraid, Cherry, 32 00:01:13,680 --> 00:01:16,256 - that's just asking for trouble. - In case it pops. - Oh, my God. 33 00:01:16,280 --> 00:01:18,976 I am absolutely pumped about this, to be fair to me. 34 00:01:19,000 --> 00:01:20,656 Start again, Paul. 35 00:01:20,680 --> 00:01:23,096 OK, Amy? This is really fun, isn't it? 36 00:01:23,120 --> 00:01:24,576 No, it isn't, I don't want to go on. 37 00:01:24,600 --> 00:01:26,296 I feel like... not James Bond, 38 00:01:26,320 --> 00:01:28,896 but, you know, people who... people who go on boats. 39 00:01:28,920 --> 00:01:30,736 Oh, Paul, give it some welly! 40 00:01:30,760 --> 00:01:32,656 Yeah, I'm giving it - this is welly, Mum! 41 00:01:32,680 --> 00:01:35,216 - This is what welly looks like. - Shall I ask one of the men to help? 42 00:01:35,240 --> 00:01:38,136 What do you mean? I'm a man! I'm one of the men! 43 00:01:38,160 --> 00:01:41,296 - No. - Yeah, but, like, one of the proper boat guys? - Yeah. 44 00:01:41,320 --> 00:01:44,616 I'm a proper boat guy! I'm a sailor man, mate. 45 00:01:44,640 --> 00:01:46,616 And it's not me - my technique's spot on, 46 00:01:46,640 --> 00:01:50,136 it's just this, this pull cord's really, really stiff. 47 00:01:50,160 --> 00:01:51,736 Come on, girl. 48 00:01:51,760 --> 00:01:53,296 Or I could have a go if you like? 49 00:01:53,320 --> 00:01:54,456 THEY GASP 50 00:01:54,480 --> 00:01:56,736 Oh, my God, Robin! 51 00:01:56,760 --> 00:01:58,496 Man over board! 52 00:01:58,520 --> 00:01:59,937 Robin! 53 00:01:59,961 --> 00:02:01,376 PANICKED SHOUTING 54 00:02:01,400 --> 00:02:04,120 Oh, it's not that deep, actually. I'm OK. 55 00:02:05,560 --> 00:02:06,737 PAUL GROANS - What's going on? 56 00:02:06,761 --> 00:02:07,976 Dad's hogging the toilet. 57 00:02:08,000 --> 00:02:09,576 Er, I'm not hogging the toilet, Amy, 58 00:02:09,600 --> 00:02:11,456 I'm trying to clean this flipping earwax out 59 00:02:11,480 --> 00:02:12,536 I think it's compacted. 60 00:02:12,560 --> 00:02:15,216 Well, yeah, of course it is, you keep prodding it with cotton buds, 61 00:02:15,240 --> 00:02:16,696 what did you think it was going to do? 62 00:02:16,720 --> 00:02:18,416 I just thought that if I probed the left ear 63 00:02:18,440 --> 00:02:20,736 - then the wax would eventually... - Come out the right one? 64 00:02:20,760 --> 00:02:23,816 Oh, yeah, ha, ha, mate. Ha, ha. 65 00:02:23,840 --> 00:02:26,256 Can you not film me while I'm in the bathroom please, Sam? 66 00:02:26,280 --> 00:02:27,496 Why? Because of the nightie? 67 00:02:27,520 --> 00:02:32,056 No, because the bathroom is meant to be a sanctuary, a safe space, 68 00:02:32,080 --> 00:02:34,056 not part of your documentary, thank you. 69 00:02:34,080 --> 00:02:35,656 Why are you wearing a nightie, in fact? 70 00:02:35,680 --> 00:02:37,296 It's not a nightie, it's a long T-shirt. 71 00:02:37,320 --> 00:02:38,656 What's going on? I need the loo. 72 00:02:38,680 --> 00:02:39,696 Well, go on, then. 73 00:02:39,720 --> 00:02:42,096 No, I mean... properly. 74 00:02:42,120 --> 00:02:44,456 - ALL: Urgh. - Gross! - Great, Mum, thanks for telling us that. 75 00:02:44,480 --> 00:02:46,496 Well, he made me - can you hurry up, please, Paul? 76 00:02:46,520 --> 00:02:48,296 Yeah, I'm just getting my earwax out, babe. 77 00:02:48,320 --> 00:02:50,856 Oh, God, not this again. Why are you so waxy? 78 00:02:50,880 --> 00:02:54,936 I am not "so" waxy, I just happen to have a high functioning gland 79 00:02:54,960 --> 00:02:56,896 and a narrow ear canal. 80 00:02:56,920 --> 00:02:58,656 It's a bad design, frankly. 81 00:02:58,680 --> 00:02:59,976 What? The ear? 82 00:03:00,000 --> 00:03:01,536 - Yes, the ear. - Ugh. 83 00:03:01,560 --> 00:03:03,176 I need to unclog, pronto. 84 00:03:03,200 --> 00:03:04,496 If I can't hear properly 85 00:03:04,520 --> 00:03:06,576 then the police won't let me on the training course 86 00:03:06,600 --> 00:03:07,936 and my medical's in four weeks. 87 00:03:07,960 --> 00:03:09,976 Yeah, well, I've got my lecture in 25 minutes, 88 00:03:10,000 --> 00:03:11,736 - and you're dropping me off! - Yeah. 89 00:03:11,760 --> 00:03:14,496 Hello? Morning all! 90 00:03:14,520 --> 00:03:16,416 - Morning, Mum. - Oh, hi. 91 00:03:16,440 --> 00:03:18,496 Why has she got keys? 92 00:03:18,520 --> 00:03:20,336 Did you get her keys? 93 00:03:20,360 --> 00:03:22,200 I've brought crossed buns! 94 00:03:23,160 --> 00:03:24,896 Have you got your own keys, Mum? 95 00:03:24,920 --> 00:03:26,136 Why have you got your own keys? 96 00:03:26,160 --> 00:03:27,536 I got some cut. 97 00:03:27,560 --> 00:03:29,176 Um, sorry what do you mean crossed buns? 98 00:03:29,200 --> 00:03:30,376 Do you mean hot crossed buns? 99 00:03:30,400 --> 00:03:32,016 No, these are cold. 100 00:03:32,040 --> 00:03:33,136 Oh... 101 00:03:33,160 --> 00:03:37,856 Now, then, Sammy, I thought you were stopping doing your videos 102 00:03:37,880 --> 00:03:40,016 to concentrate on your GCSEs. 103 00:03:40,040 --> 00:03:44,776 Oh, yeah, no, I am. I will, Granny, you know, soon. 104 00:03:44,800 --> 00:03:46,936 How did you cut your own key, Sue? 105 00:03:46,960 --> 00:03:49,496 Did you take a set from the house without us knowing? 106 00:03:49,520 --> 00:03:53,456 Oh, don't put it like that, Rachel, that makes it sound really sneaky. 107 00:03:53,480 --> 00:03:55,376 Well, it is really sneaky! 108 00:03:55,400 --> 00:03:57,696 - Oh! - Huh? - Oh, Paul! 109 00:03:57,720 --> 00:04:00,256 Oh, put some undies on for goodness' sake. 110 00:04:00,280 --> 00:04:01,456 Oh, Mum! For God...! Oh! 111 00:04:01,480 --> 00:04:04,216 - Oh, no! - But I've seen it all before. 112 00:04:04,240 --> 00:04:06,096 - Yeah, not recently, you haven't. - God. 113 00:04:06,120 --> 00:04:08,696 - Well, you've not changed much, really. - Well, that's not true. 114 00:04:08,720 --> 00:04:10,136 That's not true. 115 00:04:10,160 --> 00:04:13,936 And - and the law has changed, that's actually up skirting. 116 00:04:13,960 --> 00:04:19,016 As per the voyeurism of fences act of 2019 it is a major crime. 117 00:04:19,040 --> 00:04:20,576 Oh, here we go, spot the copper. 118 00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:21,616 Well... 119 00:04:21,640 --> 00:04:24,256 Well, it's your fault for wearing a nightie. 120 00:04:24,280 --> 00:04:27,776 - Yeah, exactly. - It's not a nightie, it's a long T-shirt! 121 00:04:27,800 --> 00:04:30,216 That is a nightie, that's what a nightie is. 122 00:04:30,240 --> 00:04:33,016 Find some pyjamas if you need to wear something in bed. 123 00:04:33,040 --> 00:04:35,976 I'm not wearing pyjamas like some kind of 124 00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:37,296 banana. 125 00:04:37,320 --> 00:04:39,136 Well, you need to cover your banana 126 00:04:39,160 --> 00:04:41,016 if you're going to stand on the staircase. 127 00:04:41,040 --> 00:04:43,336 - Oh, my God. - Knock, knock! - Robin. - Morning all. 128 00:04:43,360 --> 00:04:45,856 - Aww. - All right? - Hey. - All right, Spielberg? 129 00:04:45,880 --> 00:04:48,296 Hey, Susan, come on, give us a squeeze. 130 00:04:48,320 --> 00:04:53,416 Hiya, Robin. Now, then, can I tempt you with a crossed bun? 131 00:04:53,440 --> 00:04:54,896 Urgh, yuck, don't like 'em. 132 00:04:54,920 --> 00:04:57,176 Just a cup of tea would be ideal, thank you. 133 00:04:57,200 --> 00:04:58,896 - We're not staying for long. - No. 134 00:04:58,920 --> 00:05:00,536 Just need to use the printer, if poss, 135 00:05:00,560 --> 00:05:02,256 - print out Cherry's divorce papers. - Yeah. 136 00:05:02,280 --> 00:05:03,696 Oh, OK. Well, quickly, then. 137 00:05:03,720 --> 00:05:07,616 Divorce? I thought you divorced Ian yonks ago, Cheryl. 138 00:05:07,640 --> 00:05:09,896 - Mm. - Well, I have been trying to, so, 139 00:05:09,920 --> 00:05:13,616 but he keeps refusing to sign the divorce papers 140 00:05:13,640 --> 00:05:16,776 - because he still loves me so much. Selfish git. - Oh, dear. 141 00:05:16,800 --> 00:05:19,016 Oh, he'll sign. I'll make him sign. 142 00:05:19,040 --> 00:05:21,896 I'm going to talk to the guy next week, mano a mano. 143 00:05:21,920 --> 00:05:23,616 Yeah, and I'm going to come, an' all. 144 00:05:23,640 --> 00:05:26,776 Yeah... Well, no, hang on, if you're there it's not mano a mano is it? 145 00:05:26,800 --> 00:05:28,536 Then it's mano a mano a womano. 146 00:05:28,560 --> 00:05:32,056 Er, "mano" means hand in Italian. 147 00:05:32,080 --> 00:05:35,256 - Oh... - So... Er, just email me the document I'll get it... 148 00:05:35,280 --> 00:05:37,576 - I like the old, er... What do you call them? - Yeah, well... 149 00:05:37,600 --> 00:05:38,597 Hairy horns? 150 00:05:38,621 --> 00:05:39,616 MIMICS CLOWN HORN 151 00:05:39,640 --> 00:05:42,016 - Space buns. - Yeah. - They were quite trendy last year. - Right. 152 00:05:42,040 --> 00:05:43,096 And this year, no? 153 00:05:43,120 --> 00:05:45,656 She's trying to blend in with the other freshers on her course. 154 00:05:45,680 --> 00:05:49,456 - Mm. - What? Are you still called a fresher, Rachel, at your age? - Yeah. 155 00:05:49,480 --> 00:05:52,176 - I love that. - Oh, ha, ha, thank you, thank you for that, Sue, yeah. 156 00:05:52,200 --> 00:05:54,896 You know, ideologically, we're all pretty much the same, so... 157 00:05:54,920 --> 00:05:56,856 Er, you're the weirdo older student, Mum, 158 00:05:56,880 --> 00:05:58,736 you're not going to become friends with them 159 00:05:58,760 --> 00:06:01,536 - just because you put your hair in a bun. - It's two buns. And I might. 160 00:06:01,560 --> 00:06:03,896 - Right. - You won't. - Hello. - You all right? - Yeah, good, you? 161 00:06:03,920 --> 00:06:07,016 - Right, well I'm going to get the buns out! - Ooh, er, missus. 162 00:06:07,040 --> 00:06:10,776 Amy, I haven't seen you since you got back. 163 00:06:10,800 --> 00:06:12,656 - Farvel. - What? 164 00:06:12,680 --> 00:06:15,696 - Farvel. - Is it farvel? - Robin said it was farvel. 165 00:06:15,720 --> 00:06:17,016 - Is it not? - What's this farvel? 166 00:06:17,040 --> 00:06:18,136 It's hello in Danish, no? 167 00:06:18,160 --> 00:06:19,376 - Yeah. - I was in Norway. 168 00:06:19,400 --> 00:06:21,776 - You... Oh, sorry, yes, Norge. - Yeah. - Mm. 169 00:06:21,800 --> 00:06:24,336 Same sort of thing, innit? A lot of white people on bikes. 170 00:06:24,360 --> 00:06:26,336 - Um... - Happy to be home, are ya? 171 00:06:26,360 --> 00:06:28,616 Nope, unhappy to be home. 172 00:06:28,640 --> 00:06:31,016 - Aww. - I want to go back as soon as possible. 173 00:06:31,040 --> 00:06:32,816 Oh, come on, Amy, that's not true. 174 00:06:32,840 --> 00:06:36,256 Yeah - and in the meantime she's been trying to turn the place into Oslo, 175 00:06:36,280 --> 00:06:39,256 hence all the scatter cushions and trolls everywhere, urgh. 176 00:06:39,280 --> 00:06:42,336 Um, I'm trying to make the place more hygge, yeah. 177 00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:44,256 - Oh, here we go. - What? More what? 178 00:06:44,280 --> 00:06:46,576 - Hygge. - It's Norwegian for cosy. 179 00:06:46,600 --> 00:06:49,016 - Um, it's way more nuanced than that. - Mm-hm. 180 00:06:49,040 --> 00:06:51,536 She'll be putting an oil rig in the garden next. 181 00:06:51,560 --> 00:06:53,776 - Yeah - and charging us £40 for a beer. - Yeah! 182 00:06:53,800 --> 00:06:56,376 Oh, ha, ha, funny. 183 00:06:56,400 --> 00:06:59,856 I mean, what's Norway got that you can't find here, for goodness' sake? 184 00:06:59,880 --> 00:07:02,656 My friend Kare took me out on his boat on the fjords. 185 00:07:02,680 --> 00:07:05,656 - So? - OK, but come on, there's loads of great things here, Amy... 186 00:07:05,680 --> 00:07:08,616 - Yeah! - ..In the UK, you know there's, there's... 187 00:07:08,640 --> 00:07:10,176 - Er... - Um... 188 00:07:10,200 --> 00:07:12,456 - Norwich Castle's reopening. - Yeah. 189 00:07:12,480 --> 00:07:13,696 New series of I'm A Celeb! 190 00:07:13,720 --> 00:07:15,296 And I - I've sold my house. 191 00:07:15,320 --> 00:07:16,536 Er, Carabao Cup Final. 192 00:07:16,560 --> 00:07:18,776 - Er, Maya will be back from university soon, so... - Yeah. 193 00:07:18,800 --> 00:07:21,176 You sold your house? I thought it was only under offer? 194 00:07:21,200 --> 00:07:23,056 Exchanged contracts on Thursday. 195 00:07:23,080 --> 00:07:25,336 - Hey! - Oh! - That's good, innit? 196 00:07:25,360 --> 00:07:27,536 Why is that something for Amy to look forward to? 197 00:07:27,560 --> 00:07:30,456 Well, you can all come and help yourself to my gubbins. 198 00:07:30,480 --> 00:07:32,136 Gubbins, what do you mean, gubbins? 199 00:07:32,160 --> 00:07:34,976 - Well, I've got to clear everything out. - Really? 200 00:07:35,000 --> 00:07:38,056 Oh, you'll love it, Amy, a lot of it is very higgledy. 201 00:07:38,080 --> 00:07:41,456 - Hygge. - Uh-huh, yeah. - Like what? 202 00:07:41,480 --> 00:07:44,816 I've got doilies coming out of my drawers. 203 00:07:44,840 --> 00:07:47,656 Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho! 204 00:07:47,680 --> 00:07:49,776 You meant... Sorry, I thought you meant knickers. 205 00:07:49,800 --> 00:07:52,376 - Robin. - You've got doilies. You've got doilies, Sue. I'm sorry. 206 00:07:52,400 --> 00:07:55,896 I've got doilies, cushions, more gnomes. 207 00:07:55,920 --> 00:07:58,296 Oh, no, not gnomes, the gnomes you can chuck. 208 00:07:58,320 --> 00:08:00,456 One of them looks exactly like Paul, actually! 209 00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:02,896 - Oh does it? - No, it doesn't. No, it doesn't. 210 00:08:02,920 --> 00:08:04,616 So, where are you moving to, then, Granny? 211 00:08:04,640 --> 00:08:07,456 I want to buy a flat but I can't find anywhere I like 212 00:08:07,480 --> 00:08:11,576 so I think I'll just have to rent somewhere for the time being. 213 00:08:11,600 --> 00:08:13,096 You should move in here, Granny. 214 00:08:13,120 --> 00:08:16,296 Ha, ha! Well, no, no. 215 00:08:16,320 --> 00:08:19,016 No, that would be impractical, I fear, 216 00:08:19,040 --> 00:08:21,016 it takes us a month to use the bathroom, 217 00:08:21,040 --> 00:08:23,296 er, in the morning as it is, do you know what I mean? 218 00:08:23,320 --> 00:08:26,176 Yeah, well I-I don't want to get in the way. 219 00:08:26,200 --> 00:08:27,936 Um, tea for you, Rachel? 220 00:08:27,960 --> 00:08:30,056 Er, no, I'm all right, thanks, Sue, I've got to go 221 00:08:30,080 --> 00:08:32,536 um, as do you all, actually, no offence. 222 00:08:32,560 --> 00:08:34,256 - We've all got to go, sorry. - OK, um... 223 00:08:34,280 --> 00:08:35,576 There's your divorce papers. 224 00:08:35,600 --> 00:08:37,816 Thanks. Have you got a takeaway cup for the tea? 225 00:08:37,840 --> 00:08:40,296 - No, because this isn't Starbucks. - OK, hang on, then. 226 00:08:40,320 --> 00:08:42,496 - He's downing it. - Mate, don't... 227 00:08:42,520 --> 00:08:44,336 No, don't down it, you bell. 228 00:08:44,360 --> 00:08:45,896 "Farvel" means goodbye, by the way. 229 00:08:45,920 --> 00:08:47,336 - Ah, OK. - Oh, God. 230 00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:49,680 - - Well, farvel! - It's boiling hot. - Argh! 231 00:08:51,440 --> 00:08:54,240 - We can try again tomorrow, so... - Mm, well, maybe, yeah. 232 00:08:55,360 --> 00:08:57,056 Why are you going this way? 233 00:08:57,080 --> 00:08:58,696 Oh, I need to go to the chandler's. 234 00:08:58,720 --> 00:09:00,176 - The what? - He means the boat shop. - No. 235 00:09:00,200 --> 00:09:01,816 - Yeah, I need to get a new pull cord... - No. 236 00:09:01,840 --> 00:09:04,536 - ..and we need some engine oil, so... - No, I need - I need to get home. 237 00:09:04,560 --> 00:09:07,816 Oh, and we should get some olive oil for your ear, Paul. 238 00:09:07,840 --> 00:09:09,816 Well, they won't sell that at the chandler's. 239 00:09:09,840 --> 00:09:11,616 Olive oil? What are you talking about? 240 00:09:11,640 --> 00:09:15,576 If you pour olive oil in your ear it'll get rid of the wax. 241 00:09:15,600 --> 00:09:16,856 Yeah, great idea, Mum! 242 00:09:16,880 --> 00:09:18,576 Maybe if I squirt some mayonnaise up my bum 243 00:09:18,600 --> 00:09:21,256 - it'll sort out my constipation. - Urgh. - Ugh, Dad. 244 00:09:21,280 --> 00:09:23,456 Well, putting less of it in your mouth might help, yes. 245 00:09:23,480 --> 00:09:25,056 And - and we've got olive oil at home. 246 00:09:25,080 --> 00:09:27,176 Yes, but we don't have engine oil, 247 00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:29,016 so we do need to go to the chandler's. 248 00:09:29,040 --> 00:09:32,856 - Also I need to buy a buoy. - What? What do you mean? 249 00:09:32,880 --> 00:09:34,616 - Like a... a cabin boy? - No! What?! 250 00:09:34,640 --> 00:09:37,256 No, it's like a bouncy, floaty thing 251 00:09:37,280 --> 00:09:38,937 - that protects the boat. - PHONE VIBRATES 252 00:09:38,963 --> 00:09:40,696 I'm not trying to buy a male child, Mum. 253 00:09:40,720 --> 00:09:44,216 It's inflatable, the whole boat is basically a buoy, 254 00:09:44,240 --> 00:09:46,696 we do not need to go to the boat shop. 255 00:09:46,720 --> 00:09:49,296 - Oh, for God's sake... - Chandler's. 256 00:09:49,320 --> 00:09:51,736 - Aww... - What is it? Another one of the students drop out? 257 00:09:51,760 --> 00:09:54,696 No, it-it's this party, they just keep leaving the WhatsApp group, 258 00:09:54,720 --> 00:09:56,856 they don't even say they can't come, they just leave. 259 00:09:56,880 --> 00:09:59,416 I mean, should I add them again? They might've left by mistake. 260 00:09:59,440 --> 00:10:01,576 - No. - Definitely not, that's really lame. 261 00:10:01,600 --> 00:10:03,456 I'm going to write good riddance. 262 00:10:03,480 --> 00:10:04,536 No, don't do anything, 263 00:10:04,560 --> 00:10:07,016 you'll just scare off the stragglers still on there. 264 00:10:07,040 --> 00:10:08,056 INDICATOR TICKS 265 00:10:08,080 --> 00:10:10,496 No, no, I said - we're, we're not going to the boat shop, Paul. 266 00:10:10,520 --> 00:10:12,816 - It's the chandler's! - No! No! - I need a new pull cord... - No! 267 00:10:12,840 --> 00:10:14,776 - ..and it's the chandler's. - We've got to go home! 268 00:10:14,800 --> 00:10:16,736 - Rachel, please! Please! - Why are you doing this? 269 00:10:16,760 --> 00:10:17,816 - Oh, my God. - Why? Why now?! 270 00:10:17,840 --> 00:10:20,240 - I'm just going to get a pull cord and a little buoy. - God! 271 00:10:23,720 --> 00:10:24,896 Oh, my God! 272 00:10:24,920 --> 00:10:26,576 The likeness is uncanny. 273 00:10:26,600 --> 00:10:28,256 No, it isn't, it just has a beard. 274 00:10:28,280 --> 00:10:29,816 It looks exactly like you, Dad! 275 00:10:29,840 --> 00:10:31,736 Why are you laughing, Mum? You married him. 276 00:10:31,760 --> 00:10:33,256 Yeah, no, fair point. 277 00:10:33,280 --> 00:10:35,360 - Huh? - Hey, hold that, Paul. - What? 278 00:10:36,400 --> 00:10:38,736 Oh, no, stop it, stop it! 279 00:10:38,760 --> 00:10:40,896 Right, give me that, I'm taking it to the skip. 280 00:10:40,920 --> 00:10:42,336 Oh, no, don't, I want to keep that. 281 00:10:42,360 --> 00:10:43,936 Agh, ngh... 282 00:10:43,960 --> 00:10:45,096 Oh, gosh, are you OK? 283 00:10:45,120 --> 00:10:46,656 No, my ear's blocked again. 284 00:10:46,680 --> 00:10:48,936 Agh, am I clicking, am I clicking guys? 285 00:10:48,960 --> 00:10:50,576 Oh, wicked, is that a Super 8? 286 00:10:50,600 --> 00:10:53,976 Oh, no, it's a camera, that's your grandad's old CineOne. 287 00:10:54,000 --> 00:10:56,976 - Can I have it? - Give me that, Paul, I'll take that. 288 00:10:57,000 --> 00:10:58,216 Granny, can I have the camera? 289 00:10:58,240 --> 00:10:59,736 Anything you like the look of? 290 00:10:59,760 --> 00:11:01,456 - Yeah, of course. - For your room? 291 00:11:01,480 --> 00:11:02,816 Nope. 292 00:11:02,840 --> 00:11:05,496 We could, er, redecorate, if you like? 293 00:11:05,520 --> 00:11:08,456 Oh, what, you think a Toby jug and a horse brass 294 00:11:08,480 --> 00:11:11,176 is going to make me not want to go back to Norway? 295 00:11:11,200 --> 00:11:12,696 No, that's not what I'm saying, Amy, 296 00:11:12,720 --> 00:11:15,016 I'm just asking you to be a bit more positive, if you can, 297 00:11:15,040 --> 00:11:17,096 about being back - you know, I know Norway was great 298 00:11:17,120 --> 00:11:19,536 and it'll take time to adjust, but... 299 00:11:19,560 --> 00:11:21,456 Oh, there's a foot spa, that might help! 300 00:11:21,480 --> 00:11:24,576 - I'm having the foot spa! - No, I was going to give it to... Oh, my God! 301 00:11:24,600 --> 00:11:25,896 Look who I found! 302 00:11:25,920 --> 00:11:29,216 - Oi-oi. - Oh, no! - Oh, my God, Robin, you've got a black eye! 303 00:11:29,240 --> 00:11:31,736 - Yeah. I have, I know I have, yeah. - Oh! - Yeah. 304 00:11:31,760 --> 00:11:33,976 Yeah, Ian did it in their mano a mano. 305 00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:35,576 - Oh, no. - Oh, Robin! 306 00:11:35,600 --> 00:11:37,456 Well, I hope you smacked him back! 307 00:11:37,480 --> 00:11:39,496 Oh, grow up! "Smacked him back!" 308 00:11:39,520 --> 00:11:40,896 Yeah, did you smack him back? 309 00:11:40,920 --> 00:11:43,096 I didn't, no, I didn't want to stoop to his level, so... 310 00:11:43,120 --> 00:11:45,256 - Ian's quite stacked. - Yeah, but that's not why, babe, 311 00:11:45,280 --> 00:11:47,936 I could've hit him, I could've probably killed him, if I wanted to. 312 00:11:47,960 --> 00:11:50,056 - Really? - But... yeah. Just a bit, just 313 00:11:50,080 --> 00:11:52,016 job done. But, no, it's better this way, 314 00:11:52,040 --> 00:11:53,576 with him as the sole aggressor 315 00:11:53,600 --> 00:11:55,456 because, er, now he has to agree to the divorce 316 00:11:55,480 --> 00:11:57,456 - in exchange for me not pressing charges. - Oh... 317 00:11:57,480 --> 00:12:00,456 - Yeah, it's actually worked out well. - Yeah. - Apart from his minging eye. 318 00:12:00,480 --> 00:12:01,656 - Yeah. - Yeah. Yeah. 319 00:12:01,680 --> 00:12:04,056 So, how's this house clearance thing work then, Sue? 320 00:12:04,080 --> 00:12:05,576 We can just take anything, can we? 321 00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:06,936 Yeah, pretty much, yeah. 322 00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:09,416 Yeah, not that, though, that's my handbag. 323 00:12:09,440 --> 00:12:11,816 - Yeah, I didn't want it anyway. - OK, great. 324 00:12:11,840 --> 00:12:15,696 And if you could help me chuck these armchairs in the skip that'd be fab. 325 00:12:15,720 --> 00:12:17,296 SHOUTS: Oh, no, you're not getting rid 326 00:12:17,320 --> 00:12:18,736 of the old armchairs are you, Mum?! 327 00:12:18,760 --> 00:12:21,496 - You're shouting again, Dad. - Huh? 328 00:12:21,520 --> 00:12:25,696 Oh, wow, Sue, you've got one of the old deep pan TVs, love it. 329 00:12:25,720 --> 00:12:27,696 Oh, and tapes, look! 330 00:12:27,720 --> 00:12:29,976 Here, Rach, you should show these to your students, 331 00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:31,536 - these are well in right now. - Yeah. 332 00:12:31,560 --> 00:12:34,576 - What? Tapes? Are they? - Yeah. - Yeah? 333 00:12:34,600 --> 00:12:36,416 I mean, everything goes in cycles, don't it? 334 00:12:36,440 --> 00:12:38,936 Tapes, crop tops, Sugababes - it's basically the '90s again. 335 00:12:38,960 --> 00:12:42,136 Um, I'm not sure Simply Red specifically are back, 336 00:12:42,160 --> 00:12:45,296 - but, yeah, by all means, put it on when they come over. - Oh, OK. 337 00:12:45,320 --> 00:12:48,336 What's this, what's this? The students are coming over, is it? 338 00:12:48,360 --> 00:12:49,816 - House party! - Mm, sort of. 339 00:12:49,840 --> 00:12:52,656 Actually, Dean and Jelson are aggressively single at the moment... 340 00:12:52,680 --> 00:12:55,336 - No. - ..If you want some blokes to just, you know... - Absolutely not. 341 00:12:55,360 --> 00:12:57,696 - Babe. - ..Get things going, you know? - No, I don't want that. 342 00:12:57,720 --> 00:12:59,576 It's not really that sort of evening, anyway, 343 00:12:59,600 --> 00:13:01,976 - we're just going to eat moussaka and chill. - What?! 344 00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:03,816 - What? - Moussaka? 345 00:13:03,840 --> 00:13:06,096 Students don't want to eat moussaka, Rach. 346 00:13:06,120 --> 00:13:08,336 Why not? Is that not a...? What's wrong with moussaka? 347 00:13:08,360 --> 00:13:09,496 Aubergines. 348 00:13:09,520 --> 00:13:11,536 The moussaka thing is a bit shit, to be fair, Mum. 349 00:13:11,560 --> 00:13:14,776 - Well, OK - and I was going to bake a lemon drizzle. - Oh, my God, no. 350 00:13:14,800 --> 00:13:17,696 Rach, Rach, it sounds - no offence - lemon jizzle. 351 00:13:17,720 --> 00:13:19,616 You need to do a drinking game or something, 352 00:13:19,640 --> 00:13:21,856 - you know, to break the ice a bit. - Mm? 353 00:13:21,880 --> 00:13:25,056 - What's this rubber thing in here? - Oh, that's the old boat. 354 00:13:25,080 --> 00:13:27,256 - What? - That wants skipping, as well, Paul. 355 00:13:27,280 --> 00:13:28,616 Hey, what the...? 356 00:13:28,640 --> 00:13:30,416 We're not chucking out the boat! The boat?! 357 00:13:30,440 --> 00:13:31,736 Er, boat? What boat? 358 00:13:31,760 --> 00:13:33,016 You've got a boat? 359 00:13:33,040 --> 00:13:35,696 - Yeah, I've got a boat. Big time. My old boat. - OK. 360 00:13:35,720 --> 00:13:38,016 Me and Daddy used to have some great times in that baby. 361 00:13:38,040 --> 00:13:40,696 - CHERRY: - Daddy? - Doing what? Fishing? 362 00:13:40,720 --> 00:13:43,176 Huh? No, no, pootling. 363 00:13:43,200 --> 00:13:45,176 Yeah, razzing around the marina. 364 00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:47,336 Yeah, it's a serious bit of kit that, Sam. 365 00:13:47,360 --> 00:13:48,936 It's a blow up dinghy, innit? 366 00:13:48,960 --> 00:13:51,456 Er, no, it is a rigid inflatable boat, thank you. 367 00:13:51,480 --> 00:13:52,496 She is not a dinghy. 368 00:13:52,520 --> 00:13:54,616 There's an engine round here somewhere, should be. 369 00:13:54,640 --> 00:13:56,096 Oh, we should - we should take it out. 370 00:13:56,120 --> 00:13:57,816 Well, hang on a sec because we've got to... 371 00:13:57,840 --> 00:13:59,216 Yeah, Amy might like it, you know, 372 00:13:59,240 --> 00:14:01,016 it might stop her going on about the fjords. 373 00:14:01,040 --> 00:14:03,416 Oh, I doubt it's still seaworthy, Rachel. 374 00:14:03,440 --> 00:14:05,696 Oh, she's still seaworthy, all right! 375 00:14:05,720 --> 00:14:09,056 - It's not even bin worthy, it's covered in mould! - It's stinky. 376 00:14:09,080 --> 00:14:11,296 Oh, that'll scrape off a treat, don't worry about that! 377 00:14:11,320 --> 00:14:13,576 - You're shouting again, Dad! - Huh? 378 00:14:13,600 --> 00:14:15,856 - Oh... - Stinky boat. - Huh? 379 00:14:15,880 --> 00:14:17,896 Have you got the new pull cord working? 380 00:14:17,920 --> 00:14:19,256 Huh? 381 00:14:19,280 --> 00:14:20,816 OK, forget it. 382 00:14:20,840 --> 00:14:22,216 What was that, Sam? 383 00:14:22,240 --> 00:14:26,096 Right, come on, Paul! Let's do your ear. 384 00:14:26,120 --> 00:14:28,256 I can't hear you, Mum! 385 00:14:28,280 --> 00:14:29,696 OK, I'm off out. 386 00:14:29,720 --> 00:14:33,136 What? But my - my student friends are coming over. 387 00:14:33,160 --> 00:14:35,096 Yeah, I know, that's why I'm going. 388 00:14:35,120 --> 00:14:38,216 No, but I need you here to, come on, you know... 389 00:14:38,240 --> 00:14:39,800 Make you seem less old? 390 00:14:40,720 --> 00:14:42,216 I mean, pretty much. 391 00:14:42,240 --> 00:14:44,696 And - and I thought you might enjoy it, as well, 392 00:14:44,720 --> 00:14:45,976 meeting people your own age. 393 00:14:46,000 --> 00:14:47,896 Who'll want to know why I'm still living at home 394 00:14:47,920 --> 00:14:50,536 and doing nothing with my life. Yeah, I wouldn't enjoy that, Mum. 395 00:14:50,560 --> 00:14:52,136 Well, I mean, where are you even going? 396 00:14:52,160 --> 00:14:54,856 They're screening a Norwegian film at the Everyman in Birmingham. 397 00:14:54,880 --> 00:14:57,536 Oh, my God, you have to stop being so obsessed with Norway, please, 398 00:14:57,560 --> 00:14:59,296 this is not healthy. 399 00:14:59,320 --> 00:15:02,336 Says the person about to drink a litre of vodka. 400 00:15:02,360 --> 00:15:05,096 I mean, that's just to break the ice, ignore that. 401 00:15:05,120 --> 00:15:06,176 What's the film? 402 00:15:06,200 --> 00:15:07,776 Um, it's a documentary about children 403 00:15:07,800 --> 00:15:10,456 suffering from seasonal affective disorder in northern Norway. 404 00:15:10,480 --> 00:15:12,336 Great, well, that'll cheer you up. 405 00:15:12,360 --> 00:15:14,776 Hang on, Birmingham? You're going to Birmingham? 406 00:15:14,800 --> 00:15:16,416 Yeah, so I need to leave now. 407 00:15:16,440 --> 00:15:18,056 Well, oh... 408 00:15:18,080 --> 00:15:20,136 How does that feel, Paul? 409 00:15:20,160 --> 00:15:21,736 Huh? 410 00:15:21,760 --> 00:15:23,616 Is it going in? 411 00:15:23,640 --> 00:15:25,976 I can't hear you, Mum, there's oil in my ear! 412 00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:27,040 Ugh. 413 00:15:28,080 --> 00:15:30,776 Er, are you two planning to be here all evening? 414 00:15:30,800 --> 00:15:31,856 Huh? 415 00:15:31,880 --> 00:15:34,536 I mean it's honestly like an old people's home in here. 416 00:15:34,560 --> 00:15:36,736 Well, do your party in the lounge, then! 417 00:15:36,760 --> 00:15:37,776 Well, no, I would, 418 00:15:37,800 --> 00:15:40,136 but there's a four horsepower boat engine in there! 419 00:15:40,160 --> 00:15:41,976 - Paul! - Yes?! 420 00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:43,576 Er, a cup of tea please, babe! 421 00:15:43,600 --> 00:15:44,896 No, I didn't... 422 00:15:44,920 --> 00:15:47,216 Why have you got a funnel in your ear? 423 00:15:47,240 --> 00:15:48,656 Huh? 424 00:15:48,680 --> 00:15:50,536 Oh, Mum was using it to pour olive oil in, 425 00:15:50,560 --> 00:15:53,056 but it actually helps me hear a bit better. 426 00:15:53,080 --> 00:15:54,096 Oh, my God. 427 00:15:54,120 --> 00:15:55,776 Oh, like an ear trumpet? 428 00:15:55,800 --> 00:15:57,736 DOORBELL RINGS It's kind of like an ear trumpet! 429 00:15:57,760 --> 00:16:00,136 - Aww... - That's what I said. 430 00:16:00,160 --> 00:16:03,536 - Huh? - Oh, God, I mean, this is great, this is exactly the image of my life 431 00:16:03,560 --> 00:16:05,296 I wanted to present to my course mates. 432 00:16:05,320 --> 00:16:07,099 - DOORBELL RINGS. - The phone's ringing, Rach! 433 00:16:07,123 --> 00:16:09,136 No, that's the doorbell! 434 00:16:09,160 --> 00:16:12,096 - Huh? - Doorbell! - Ah... 435 00:16:12,120 --> 00:16:13,336 OK. 436 00:16:13,360 --> 00:16:14,520 Oh, God. 437 00:16:17,240 --> 00:16:18,616 - Hey! - Hi. 438 00:16:18,640 --> 00:16:20,656 How's it goin'? 439 00:16:20,680 --> 00:16:23,336 - I, er, come in! Thank you. - Thank you. 440 00:16:23,360 --> 00:16:24,376 Thank you. 441 00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:25,857 NERVOUS LAUGHTER 442 00:16:25,881 --> 00:16:27,360 Um... Yeah. 443 00:16:29,560 --> 00:16:31,216 Is anyone else coming, or...? 444 00:16:31,240 --> 00:16:32,720 Um, I hope so! 445 00:16:34,840 --> 00:16:37,416 No, probably not, sorry. 446 00:16:37,440 --> 00:16:41,816 Er, people can be... people your age, very cruel on WhatsApp, can't they? 447 00:16:41,840 --> 00:16:42,936 - So... - Hello. 448 00:16:42,960 --> 00:16:45,656 Yeah. No, ignore him, that's... 449 00:16:45,680 --> 00:16:48,600 Please don't film them, Sam, they're our guests, sorry. 450 00:16:50,840 --> 00:16:52,576 I brought this. 451 00:16:52,600 --> 00:16:53,640 Great. 452 00:16:54,880 --> 00:16:55,960 That's so kind. 453 00:16:57,840 --> 00:16:59,136 Thank you. 454 00:16:59,160 --> 00:17:00,176 Come this way. 455 00:17:00,200 --> 00:17:05,296 Yeah, no, I was going to just put on a tape. Um... Love tapes. 456 00:17:05,320 --> 00:17:07,096 - Yeah... - Hello, there! 457 00:17:07,120 --> 00:17:08,856 - Do you like tapes? - Hello? 458 00:17:08,880 --> 00:17:10,496 - Hi! - Huh? 459 00:17:10,520 --> 00:17:11,816 No, er, don't go in that room! 460 00:17:11,840 --> 00:17:13,936 - Oh, er... - No! - Hi. 461 00:17:13,960 --> 00:17:15,576 I'm Sue. 462 00:17:15,600 --> 00:17:17,016 I'll get me trumpet. 463 00:17:17,040 --> 00:17:20,016 Oh, yes, God, yeah, this is Sue and this is Paul, 464 00:17:20,040 --> 00:17:21,736 er, these are my course mates... 465 00:17:21,760 --> 00:17:24,016 I realise I actually don't even know your names. 466 00:17:24,040 --> 00:17:25,576 Oh, er, er, Fara. 467 00:17:25,600 --> 00:17:26,976 - And Xiaoming. - Xiaoming. 468 00:17:27,000 --> 00:17:28,136 Huh? 469 00:17:28,160 --> 00:17:30,656 Lovely to meet you. 470 00:17:30,680 --> 00:17:32,240 Paul Jessop. 471 00:17:34,240 --> 00:17:36,240 Do you live with your parents? 472 00:17:37,480 --> 00:17:38,760 Er... 473 00:17:40,720 --> 00:17:44,776 Yeah. Yeah, I do. 474 00:17:44,800 --> 00:17:46,496 It is a bit of a drag, 475 00:17:46,520 --> 00:17:49,816 but it does save a lot of money, so it's, you know... 476 00:17:49,840 --> 00:17:51,936 I'm a former Olympic archer! 477 00:17:51,960 --> 00:17:53,936 It's... God, yeah. 478 00:17:53,960 --> 00:17:55,456 Right. 479 00:17:55,480 --> 00:17:56,576 My Dad. 480 00:17:56,600 --> 00:17:58,536 You know, maybe we should... 481 00:17:58,560 --> 00:18:00,536 I-I feel like I want to... leave. 482 00:18:00,560 --> 00:18:01,736 No. No, no, no, no, no! 483 00:18:01,760 --> 00:18:03,776 Don't, don't be silly, no, it's going to be great, 484 00:18:03,800 --> 00:18:04,816 just need to relax a bit 485 00:18:04,840 --> 00:18:06,696 and I actually planned a drinking game for us. 486 00:18:06,720 --> 00:18:08,896 - Oh, I don't really drink, but... - No, just a little one, 487 00:18:08,920 --> 00:18:10,816 just an ice breaker, you know, 488 00:18:10,840 --> 00:18:14,176 um, get some atmos going, loosen you up a bit! 489 00:18:14,200 --> 00:18:15,656 Is that...? Do I need that? 490 00:18:15,680 --> 00:18:17,096 Loosen up all of us. 491 00:18:17,120 --> 00:18:20,736 So, it's the same rules as Play Your Cards Right, so, very simple. 492 00:18:20,760 --> 00:18:23,176 - What's that? - What's...? 493 00:18:23,200 --> 00:18:24,856 Well, yeah, no, fair point, 494 00:18:24,880 --> 00:18:27,536 you're probably, um, too young to know that. 495 00:18:27,560 --> 00:18:30,696 Well, it's, um - it was a Bruce Forsyth show. 496 00:18:30,720 --> 00:18:32,176 Er, who? 497 00:18:32,200 --> 00:18:33,856 Brucie. 498 00:18:33,880 --> 00:18:35,016 Brucie, come on. 499 00:18:35,040 --> 00:18:38,720 I mean, you must've seen Brucie growing up. 500 00:18:39,880 --> 00:18:42,176 I grew up in Chengdu. 501 00:18:42,200 --> 00:18:46,080 Even so, he was... he was this guy, he used to do this. 502 00:18:47,520 --> 00:18:48,560 Why? 503 00:18:49,920 --> 00:18:54,096 I don't... I have no idea, he just did that - that... 504 00:18:54,120 --> 00:18:56,416 The point is, that doesn't matter. 505 00:18:56,440 --> 00:19:00,536 I play a card and you have to say if the next one is higher or lower 506 00:19:00,560 --> 00:19:03,016 and if you get it wrong you have to drink half the glass 507 00:19:03,040 --> 00:19:05,936 and if you get a blackjack or an ace you have to drink the whole glass 508 00:19:05,960 --> 00:19:07,936 and if it's a seven it changes direction, got it? 509 00:19:07,960 --> 00:19:09,976 Er, I didn't understand this thing about Brucie. 510 00:19:10,000 --> 00:19:11,416 Forget that, that's not relevant. 511 00:19:11,440 --> 00:19:13,176 Er, and I'm not sure I really want to play. 512 00:19:13,200 --> 00:19:15,336 No, you will want to play once you play, 513 00:19:15,360 --> 00:19:16,816 because it's going to be great, OK? 514 00:19:16,840 --> 00:19:18,840 - MUSIC: Stars by Simply Red. - And... turn a card. 515 00:19:19,840 --> 00:19:23,240 Eight, OK, so I'm going to go lower. 516 00:19:24,360 --> 00:19:27,160 Ah, it's ten, so that means I've got to drink half of that. 517 00:19:30,480 --> 00:19:33,536 Gosh, that's... that is a lot stronger than I thought. 518 00:19:33,560 --> 00:19:36,240 It's nice, um, but it's got quite a kick. 519 00:19:39,360 --> 00:19:40,680 It's really strong. 520 00:19:42,600 --> 00:19:44,536 Good, but strong. Great. 521 00:19:44,560 --> 00:19:47,576 OK, so, your go, Xiaoming - higher or lower? 522 00:19:47,600 --> 00:19:48,616 Lower. 523 00:19:48,640 --> 00:19:49,656 Lower. 524 00:19:49,680 --> 00:19:52,536 Seven! It is lower, and seven means it goes back to me, 525 00:19:52,560 --> 00:19:54,976 so it's my turn again. Er, I'm going to go... 526 00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:57,056 Yeah, I'm going to go lower than a seven. 527 00:19:57,080 --> 00:19:58,336 Oh, my goodness, 528 00:19:58,360 --> 00:20:01,600 OK, so, it's a queen, which means I'm going to drink the rest of it. 529 00:20:02,920 --> 00:20:05,600 I'm getting a bit of a head start, aren't I?! 530 00:20:09,640 --> 00:20:11,296 Agh. 531 00:20:11,320 --> 00:20:13,616 - SLURRING: - So, what's your name again? 532 00:20:13,640 --> 00:20:15,496 - Er, Fara. - Faro, Faro... 533 00:20:15,520 --> 00:20:18,176 Fara, are you going to go higher or lower than a queen? 534 00:20:18,200 --> 00:20:19,216 Lower. 535 00:20:19,240 --> 00:20:21,136 Lower, that's a good guess. 536 00:20:21,160 --> 00:20:25,656 You're right, it's a good... and, Xiaoming, higher or lower? 537 00:20:25,680 --> 00:20:26,776 Er, higher. 538 00:20:26,800 --> 00:20:28,656 Higher. I'd go higher. 539 00:20:28,680 --> 00:20:31,016 You are higher, it is higher. 540 00:20:31,040 --> 00:20:32,840 I'm going to go lower than a king. 541 00:20:34,080 --> 00:20:37,496 Oh come on, it's a blackjack! 542 00:20:37,520 --> 00:20:39,256 It's a blackjack! 543 00:20:39,280 --> 00:20:42,120 That means I'm going to have to drink the whole thing, so... 544 00:20:44,640 --> 00:20:45,960 Uh-oh. 545 00:20:49,160 --> 00:20:51,256 Because that was punishment, 546 00:20:51,280 --> 00:20:53,600 it's my go again. I'm going to go 547 00:20:55,080 --> 00:20:56,256 lower. 548 00:20:56,280 --> 00:20:57,480 Oh... 549 00:20:59,440 --> 00:21:00,536 You all right? 550 00:21:00,560 --> 00:21:01,880 Sorry. 551 00:21:03,960 --> 00:21:05,656 It's all good. 552 00:21:05,680 --> 00:21:06,856 It's really nice. 553 00:21:06,880 --> 00:21:07,920 PAUL SNORES 554 00:21:11,600 --> 00:21:14,216 OK, I'm going to go lower than an ace. 555 00:21:14,240 --> 00:21:15,256 Oh, God, thank God. 556 00:21:15,280 --> 00:21:16,536 Xiaoming? 557 00:21:16,560 --> 00:21:18,416 - Higher. - Higher? Higher? 558 00:21:18,440 --> 00:21:20,856 It is higher and it's a seven so it's back to me. 559 00:21:20,880 --> 00:21:24,080 I'm going to go lower than a seven. 560 00:21:29,920 --> 00:21:31,160 OK... 561 00:21:32,520 --> 00:21:34,376 Cool. 562 00:21:34,400 --> 00:21:36,416 Is... Is she doing this on purpose? 563 00:21:36,440 --> 00:21:38,136 Yeah, Mum, probably don't have that one. 564 00:21:38,160 --> 00:21:40,440 This is really fun, isn't it really fun? 565 00:21:48,120 --> 00:21:49,237 Rach? 566 00:21:49,261 --> 00:21:50,376 SHE GROANS 567 00:21:50,400 --> 00:21:51,520 - Rach? - Mm? 568 00:21:53,120 --> 00:21:55,720 I brought you some water, Rachel, love. 569 00:21:57,800 --> 00:21:58,976 What happened? 570 00:21:59,000 --> 00:22:01,296 You fell asleep and were sick. 571 00:22:01,320 --> 00:22:02,600 Oh... 572 00:22:04,280 --> 00:22:06,160 Oh... 573 00:22:07,400 --> 00:22:09,216 Are they still here? 574 00:22:09,240 --> 00:22:11,456 No, they went a while ago. 575 00:22:11,480 --> 00:22:13,256 Mm. 576 00:22:13,280 --> 00:22:15,736 When you didn't come back from the loo 577 00:22:15,760 --> 00:22:20,896 we ended up showing Xiaoming a load of Bruce Forsyth videos on YouTube. 578 00:22:20,920 --> 00:22:22,696 Mm. 579 00:22:22,720 --> 00:22:25,736 Well, I guess I'll definitely be the weird old student now. 580 00:22:25,760 --> 00:22:28,416 - With good reason, to be fair. - Yeah. 581 00:22:28,440 --> 00:22:30,496 Right, come on, let's get you to bed. 582 00:22:30,520 --> 00:22:33,016 - Ooh, ooh, hang on. - Oh, oh, God, what's that? 583 00:22:33,040 --> 00:22:35,336 - Oh...! - No, what is it? 584 00:22:35,360 --> 00:22:37,616 - That's my earwax! - Oh, oh, my God! - Oh! 585 00:22:37,640 --> 00:22:39,816 - Oh, my God! - Oh, my God, oh, my God, that's disgusting. 586 00:22:39,840 --> 00:22:41,896 - Oh, my God. - Wow! - Oh, Sam, get it off me, get it off me! 587 00:22:41,920 --> 00:22:43,416 - I'm-I'm not touching it. - Oh, God! 588 00:22:43,440 --> 00:22:44,776 I can hear everything. 589 00:22:44,800 --> 00:22:46,816 - I'm like Superman. - Oh! - Urgh. 590 00:22:46,840 --> 00:22:49,016 Or - or normal man, a policeman, anyway! 591 00:22:49,040 --> 00:22:51,256 I told you the olive oil would work, didn't I? 592 00:22:51,280 --> 00:22:53,376 - Yeah! Oh, Mum, thanks so much. - Oh, my God, oh, my God! 593 00:22:53,400 --> 00:22:54,856 I don't know what I'd do without you. 594 00:22:54,880 --> 00:22:56,496 Oh, it's all smeared, it's disgusting! 595 00:22:56,520 --> 00:22:57,576 Oh, come on, jeez Louise. 596 00:22:57,600 --> 00:22:58,816 And it's... Oh, my God. 597 00:22:58,840 --> 00:23:00,816 - Overreacting much? It's just human wax. - Urgh. 598 00:23:00,840 --> 00:23:04,896 Now, make sure that your ear is dry for at least a couple of days, 599 00:23:04,920 --> 00:23:08,136 because otherwise it will get all blocked up again. 600 00:23:08,160 --> 00:23:10,136 - Yeah, yeah. - What's all the shouting about? 601 00:23:10,160 --> 00:23:11,936 My earwax came out! 602 00:23:11,960 --> 00:23:13,336 And Mum was sick. 603 00:23:13,360 --> 00:23:14,656 Amy, hi. 604 00:23:14,680 --> 00:23:15,776 - Hi. - Hiya. 605 00:23:15,800 --> 00:23:17,896 How was the Norwegian film? 606 00:23:17,920 --> 00:23:21,936 No idea, the train to Birmingham was cancelled so I missed it. 607 00:23:21,960 --> 00:23:23,736 This country's honestly shit. 608 00:23:23,760 --> 00:23:24,856 Whoa. 609 00:23:24,880 --> 00:23:27,016 - No, it's - it's not, Amy. - It's not. 610 00:23:27,040 --> 00:23:30,576 - You know, Paul's fixed the boat. - Yeah. - Haven't you, Paul? 611 00:23:30,600 --> 00:23:33,576 Yeah, she's all ship shape, ready to try again tomorrow, 612 00:23:33,600 --> 00:23:35,256 so that'll be 613 00:23:35,280 --> 00:23:37,616 good, right? Good. 614 00:23:37,640 --> 00:23:39,416 Hey? Look at that! 615 00:23:39,440 --> 00:23:41,456 Oh, you smeared it in, I wanted to keep that! 616 00:23:41,480 --> 00:23:42,976 What you doing, Sam? 617 00:23:43,000 --> 00:23:44,960 Just trying out that old camera. 618 00:23:55,600 --> 00:23:57,336 - You OK? - Yeah, no, I'm fine. 619 00:23:57,360 --> 00:23:58,496 Right, look out. 620 00:23:58,520 --> 00:24:00,616 - Yeah, thanks, Cheryl, love. - All right, OK... 621 00:24:00,640 --> 00:24:02,976 - Careful, Robin. - OK, then. - Okey do key. 622 00:24:03,000 --> 00:24:05,696 Excellent, OK, take two - now that I've fitted a new pull cord 623 00:24:05,720 --> 00:24:07,376 it should be a lot looser than yesterday, 624 00:24:07,400 --> 00:24:09,216 but please don't sit too close to the tiller, 625 00:24:09,240 --> 00:24:11,096 I don't want to give anyone another black eye. 626 00:24:11,120 --> 00:24:13,016 Well, I've got nothing left to give, by the way! 627 00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:14,896 - I'm so sorry about that again, Robin. - Ah... 628 00:24:14,920 --> 00:24:17,416 No, don't be, his face definitely looks way more even now. 629 00:24:17,440 --> 00:24:19,576 - It does, it does. - Please can we stop it from rocking? 630 00:24:19,600 --> 00:24:21,736 Yeah, we do need to sort out the weight distribution. 631 00:24:21,760 --> 00:24:23,816 - Cherry, if you move... - You what? 632 00:24:23,840 --> 00:24:25,616 What are you trying to say? 633 00:24:25,640 --> 00:24:27,056 No, I didn't... 634 00:24:27,080 --> 00:24:28,856 OK, Mum, if you could... 635 00:24:28,880 --> 00:24:30,656 What?! I've been on a diet, thank you! 636 00:24:30,680 --> 00:24:33,696 No, it's not like - it's not about that, it could be anyone, oh, my God! 637 00:24:33,720 --> 00:24:35,936 - I'll get off, I don't like boats anyway. - Thank you, Sam. 638 00:24:35,960 --> 00:24:37,336 - OK, cheers, go on, off you go. - Bye. 639 00:24:37,360 --> 00:24:39,976 All right, but don't - soft step, Sam, all right don't clomp, Sam! 640 00:24:40,000 --> 00:24:42,176 - Oh, Sam! - Don't rock it, Sam. - You're not helping, mate. 641 00:24:42,200 --> 00:24:44,536 Look, Chez, you come over here with me, look. 642 00:24:44,560 --> 00:24:46,576 - Amy, get over there next to Sue. - OK? 643 00:24:46,600 --> 00:24:49,016 All right, it will level out once we get some knots up, OK? 644 00:24:49,040 --> 00:24:51,616 - OK. Oh, God, please can we just keep it level? - All right, OK. 645 00:24:51,640 --> 00:24:54,056 Are you a bit hungover then, Rachel? 646 00:24:54,080 --> 00:24:56,096 No, no, actually, I'm just a bit seasick. 647 00:24:56,120 --> 00:24:57,256 Right, yeah. 648 00:24:57,280 --> 00:24:59,736 - Warp speed, Mr Paulo. - Yep, one sec. 649 00:24:59,760 --> 00:25:03,896 I bet this reminds you of the fjords, doesn't it? 650 00:25:03,920 --> 00:25:05,616 No. 651 00:25:05,640 --> 00:25:07,616 - OK, here we go! - Come on! 652 00:25:07,640 --> 00:25:10,416 Right, ready? Three, two, one! 653 00:25:10,440 --> 00:25:11,536 Oh! 654 00:25:11,560 --> 00:25:16,256 - Oh, my God, not again! - No! Mate, you all right? 655 00:25:16,280 --> 00:25:19,016 Not again! Robin, sit down! 656 00:25:19,040 --> 00:25:21,696 - Sit down, please! Stop rocking the boat! - Robin! 657 00:25:21,720 --> 00:25:23,096 SHE VOMITS 658 00:25:23,120 --> 00:25:25,136 Eurgh, Rach, stop vomming! 659 00:25:25,160 --> 00:25:26,776 Stop vomming, Rach! 660 00:25:26,800 --> 00:25:28,216 Oh, that's... 661 00:25:28,240 --> 00:25:30,360 SHE LAUGHS, PAUL MOANS 662 00:25:31,680 --> 00:25:33,840 That's so gross. 663 00:25:35,080 --> 00:25:36,640 ROBIN: - Argh, get out of there! 664 00:25:37,720 --> 00:25:39,120 I did say we should chuck it. 665 00:25:40,120 --> 00:25:42,240 Definitely. Get it in the skip. 666 00:25:44,320 --> 00:25:47,376 - I'll use my bod. - AMY: - Here, Mum. - Oh... 667 00:25:47,400 --> 00:25:49,136 Oh, thank you. 668 00:25:49,160 --> 00:25:50,320 Ooh... 669 00:25:51,800 --> 00:25:53,856 What are you smiling about? 670 00:25:53,880 --> 00:25:57,120 Just... I'm quite happy to be home, actually. 671 00:25:59,960 --> 00:26:01,560 Mm. 672 00:26:02,600 --> 00:26:05,216 Eurgh, you stink of vomit, Mum. 673 00:26:05,240 --> 00:26:06,816 Here you go, love. 674 00:26:06,840 --> 00:26:08,000 Thanks, Mum. 675 00:26:09,240 --> 00:26:11,280 Mm, you're the best. 676 00:26:12,760 --> 00:26:13,800 You know 677 00:26:15,200 --> 00:26:19,176 if you wanted to, you'd be welcome to move in with us 678 00:26:19,200 --> 00:26:21,320 while you're looking for somewhere else. 679 00:26:22,400 --> 00:26:24,136 - Really? - Yeah. 680 00:26:24,160 --> 00:26:26,656 Let's do something nice for you for a change. 681 00:26:26,680 --> 00:26:28,776 - Oh... - Watch out for the buoy, Rach. Rach! 682 00:26:28,800 --> 00:26:31,016 - Aah, oh! - Oh, Mum! 683 00:26:31,040 --> 00:26:32,920 - You all right? - Come on, come on get up. 684 00:26:34,480 --> 00:26:35,976 Would that be all right with Rachel? 685 00:26:36,000 --> 00:26:38,016 Yeah, definitely. 686 00:26:38,040 --> 00:26:39,256 Probably. 687 00:26:39,280 --> 00:26:43,080 But, er, we'd love you to move in with us, Mum, of course we would. 688 00:26:46,760 --> 00:26:48,376 Oh, agh... 689 00:26:48,400 --> 00:26:49,456 What is it? 690 00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:52,576 - Oh... I think the water's blocked my ear again. - Aww. 691 00:26:52,600 --> 00:26:54,896 Oh, no way, Granny kept the gnome of Dad! 692 00:26:54,920 --> 00:26:55,936 AMY: - Really? 693 00:26:55,960 --> 00:26:59,056 It's not "of" me. Mum, I thought you said you were going to bin that? 694 00:26:59,080 --> 00:27:01,016 Well, Amy said she wanted it. 695 00:27:01,040 --> 00:27:02,576 Exactly, it's mine. 696 00:27:02,600 --> 00:27:04,336 - Thanks, Granny. - No Amy, Amy! 697 00:27:04,360 --> 00:27:05,536 That's going in the skip! 698 00:27:05,560 --> 00:27:06,976 - No! - Amy! - No! 699 00:27:07,000 --> 00:27:08,176 Amy, please! 700 00:27:08,200 --> 00:27:11,496 - It's mine! - No! ROBIN: - Go on! - Amy! Sam! Seize her! 701 00:27:11,520 --> 00:27:13,056 - It's mine! - Sam! 702 00:27:13,080 --> 00:27:15,616 ♪ I 703 00:27:15,640 --> 00:27:19,496 ♪ Wanna fall from the stars 704 00:27:19,520 --> 00:27:25,056 ♪ Straight into your arms, I 705 00:27:25,080 --> 00:27:28,896 ♪ I feel you 706 00:27:28,920 --> 00:27:34,576 ♪ I hope you comprehend, I 707 00:27:34,600 --> 00:27:38,336 ♪ Wanna fall from the stars 708 00:27:38,360 --> 00:27:43,920 ♪ Straight into your arms, I 709 00:27:45,120 --> 00:27:47,896 ♪ I feel you 710 00:27:47,920 --> 00:27:53,176 ♪ I hope you comprehend, I 711 00:27:53,200 --> 00:27:56,480 ♪ Wanna fall from the stars... ♪ 712 00:27:56,530 --> 00:28:01,080 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 54776

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