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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:30,820 --> 00:00:32,424 (HYDRAULIC BRAKES HISS) 2 00:00:32,459 --> 00:00:34,459 (SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING) 3 00:00:54,580 --> 00:00:56,415 (MUSIC CONTINUES) 4 00:00:58,914 --> 00:01:00,815 MAN: Like we discussed yesterday, 5 00:01:00,850 --> 00:01:05,787 I really want you all to focus on topic sentences more. 6 00:01:05,822 --> 00:01:08,295 Too many of you are rushing into examples 7 00:01:08,330 --> 00:01:09,890 in your body paragraphs. 8 00:01:09,925 --> 00:01:11,760 It'd be good for everyone to review 9 00:01:11,795 --> 00:01:13,696 the paragraph structure PDF I sent you 10 00:01:13,731 --> 00:01:15,236 a few weeks ago. 11 00:01:15,271 --> 00:01:18,833 I know these rules can feel constraining. 12 00:01:18,868 --> 00:01:22,177 But remember, the point of this course 13 00:01:22,212 --> 00:01:26,346 is to learn how to write clearly and persuasively. 14 00:01:26,381 --> 00:01:29,679 That's how you can effectively communicate your ideas. 15 00:01:29,714 --> 00:01:30,878 (MESSAGE ALERT PINGS) 16 00:01:30,913 --> 00:01:32,346 (MAN CHUCKLES) 17 00:01:32,381 --> 00:01:35,454 Chris, I imagine that was supposed to be a private chat 18 00:01:35,489 --> 00:01:38,292 that you sent to the whole class. Well done. 19 00:01:38,327 --> 00:01:42,494 And, yes, the camera on my laptop still doesn't work. 20 00:01:42,529 --> 00:01:44,196 Believe me, you're not missing much. 21 00:01:44,231 --> 00:01:47,334 Oh, and for those of you who still haven't given me paper three, 22 00:01:47,369 --> 00:01:50,238 I need it by Wednesday, no exceptions. 23 00:01:51,307 --> 00:01:53,074 And remember, 24 00:01:53,109 --> 00:01:56,310 -the more you revise these essays, the better. - (WAVES CRASHING) 25 00:01:56,345 --> 00:01:57,872 The more you change, 26 00:01:57,907 --> 00:02:00,743 chances are you'll express your thoughts and ideas 27 00:02:00,778 --> 00:02:02,382 more clearly and persuasively. 28 00:02:03,319 --> 00:02:04,351 All right? 29 00:02:04,914 --> 00:02:06,386 (WAVE CRASHED LOUDLY) 30 00:02:13,362 --> 00:02:14,592 (MAN GRUNTS) 31 00:02:14,627 --> 00:02:16,297 (RAIN PATTERING) 32 00:02:20,369 --> 00:02:21,467 (GROANS) 33 00:02:22,602 --> 00:02:26,736 (HEAVY BREATHING) (CONTINUES GRUNTING) 34 00:02:26,771 --> 00:02:29,244 (MEN ON VIDEO BREATHING HEAVILY) 35 00:02:29,279 --> 00:02:32,313 (MAN GRUNTS) (STROKING RAPIDLY) 36 00:02:32,348 --> 00:02:33,479 Oh! 37 00:02:33,514 --> 00:02:35,811 (GRUNTING) 38 00:02:36,583 --> 00:02:40,321 (GRUNTING IN PAIN) 39 00:02:40,917 --> 00:02:45,590 (GRUNTING LABORIOUSLY) 40 00:02:45,625 --> 00:02:47,625 (COUGHS, BREATHES HEAVILY) 41 00:02:49,398 --> 00:02:54,467 (GASPING AND COUGHING) 42 00:02:54,502 --> 00:02:59,406 "Moby Dick... (WHEEZES) In the amazing book, Moby..." (GROANS) 43 00:02:59,441 --> 00:03:01,441 (KNOCK AT DOOR) Liz? 44 00:03:01,476 --> 00:03:02,970 (PANTS) (KNOCKING CONTINUES) 45 00:03:03,005 --> 00:03:06,006 Just use your key, (WHEEZES) open the door! 46 00:03:07,977 --> 00:03:09,911 (GASPS) Oh, my God. 47 00:03:09,946 --> 00:03:11,946 Who are you? (GROANS IN PAIN) 48 00:03:11,981 --> 00:03:15,048 Gosh, are you okay? Should I call an ambulance? I should call an am... 49 00:03:15,083 --> 00:03:17,589 (MEN PANTING) (CONTINUES GROANING) 50 00:03:18,922 --> 00:03:20,295 Read this to me. Do you have a phone? 51 00:03:20,330 --> 00:03:21,362 My phone's dead, I need to... 52 00:03:21,397 --> 00:03:22,891 Please just read it! Okay! 53 00:03:24,092 --> 00:03:25,564 (GRUNTS) Okay. 54 00:03:25,599 --> 00:03:27,099 (GROANS) 55 00:03:27,134 --> 00:03:29,062 "In the amazing book, Moby Dick, by the author, Herman Melville, 56 00:03:29,097 --> 00:03:31,537 "the author recounts his story of being at sea. 57 00:03:31,572 --> 00:03:33,968 "In the first part of his book, the author, calling himself Ishmael, 58 00:03:34,003 --> 00:03:35,069 "is in a small seaside town, 59 00:03:35,104 --> 00:03:37,873 "and he is sharing a bed with a man named Queequeg." 60 00:03:37,908 --> 00:03:39,072 What is this? Why am I reading this? 61 00:03:39,107 --> 00:03:41,514 I need to... Just read any of it! 62 00:03:41,549 --> 00:03:43,813 "And I felt saddest of all when I read the boring chapters 63 00:03:43,848 --> 00:03:45,114 "that were only descriptions of whales, 64 00:03:45,150 --> 00:03:47,421 "because I knew that the author was just trying to save us 65 00:03:47,456 --> 00:03:48,489 "from his own sad story..." 66 00:03:48,524 --> 00:03:50,325 (GASPING) Sad story. "...just for a little while." 67 00:03:50,360 --> 00:03:51,526 Just for a little while. 68 00:03:51,561 --> 00:03:53,559 "This book made me think about my own life... (WHEEZES) 69 00:03:53,594 --> 00:03:55,429 "...and then it made me feel glad for my..." 70 00:03:55,464 --> 00:03:57,794 (PANTING) 71 00:03:57,829 --> 00:04:00,500 Did that help? (SIGHS) 72 00:04:00,535 --> 00:04:02,403 Look, do you have a phone? My phone is dead. 73 00:04:02,438 --> 00:04:04,031 I need to call an ambulance. 74 00:04:04,066 --> 00:04:07,034 You need help. I don't go to hospitals. 75 00:04:07,069 --> 00:04:10,004 I can't help you, I don't... I don't go to hospitals. 76 00:04:11,414 --> 00:04:15,009 I am sorry, um... You can go. 77 00:04:15,044 --> 00:04:16,648 Thank you for reading that to me. 78 00:04:22,722 --> 00:04:23,919 Are you sure you're okay? 79 00:04:26,121 --> 00:04:27,824 I'm sorry, who are you? 80 00:04:29,498 --> 00:04:30,992 Are you acquainted with the Gospel of Jesus Christ? 81 00:04:31,027 --> 00:04:34,094 What? I'm sharing Christ's message of love, 82 00:04:34,129 --> 00:04:35,964 and I'm showing people... (SIGHING) Oh. 83 00:04:35,999 --> 00:04:37,504 Think I should call my friend. 84 00:04:37,539 --> 00:04:40,639 She's a nurse, she takes care of me. 85 00:04:40,674 --> 00:04:44,005 Yeah. Yeah, I'll go. Sorry to bother you. Wait. 86 00:04:45,547 --> 00:04:46,942 My phone fell under there, can you... 87 00:04:50,618 --> 00:04:51,749 Yeah, sure. 88 00:04:54,490 --> 00:04:55,687 (SIGHS) 89 00:05:02,696 --> 00:05:03,827 (SIGHS) Here it is. 90 00:05:03,862 --> 00:05:04,861 (GROANS IN PAIN) 91 00:05:08,999 --> 00:05:10,570 (MAN GRUNTS) 92 00:05:10,605 --> 00:05:12,407 Hey, listen, I don't know what's gonna happen 93 00:05:12,442 --> 00:05:14,068 in the next few minutes. 94 00:05:14,103 --> 00:05:16,807 If you don't mind, could you... (GRUNTS) 95 00:05:16,842 --> 00:05:18,941 Yeah. Yeah, of course. Thank you. 96 00:05:20,549 --> 00:05:21,911 (PHONE LINE RINGING) 97 00:05:24,619 --> 00:05:26,850 (AUTOMATED VOICE SPEAKING) It's Liz. I'm not around. Leave a message. 98 00:05:29,217 --> 00:05:31,591 What was that thing that you had me read to you? 99 00:05:33,122 --> 00:05:34,121 It's an essay. 100 00:05:34,992 --> 00:05:36,398 It's my job. 101 00:05:37,225 --> 00:05:39,566 I teach online college courses. 102 00:05:39,601 --> 00:05:40,963 But why did you have me read it to you? 103 00:05:45,233 --> 00:05:46,639 Because I thought I was dying. 104 00:05:46,674 --> 00:05:48,872 And I wanted to hear it one last time. 105 00:05:53,175 --> 00:05:54,977 (VELCRO RIPS) 106 00:05:55,012 --> 00:05:56,880 You should have called an ambulance. 107 00:05:56,915 --> 00:05:58,915 With no health insurance? 108 00:05:58,950 --> 00:06:00,851 Being in debt is better than being dead. 109 00:06:01,656 --> 00:06:02,655 What's wrong with you? 110 00:06:03,856 --> 00:06:05,691 Why is there a missionary here? 111 00:06:06,760 --> 00:06:09,123 Someone left the door unlocked. 112 00:06:09,158 --> 00:06:10,795 I left after you fell asleep earlier, 113 00:06:11,963 --> 00:06:13,061 I must've forgotten. 114 00:06:14,834 --> 00:06:16,867 Good thing, too. If I hadn't, you might have... 115 00:06:16,902 --> 00:06:18,231 Liz, I don't like it when you... 116 00:06:18,266 --> 00:06:20,475 Okay, okay. I just hate the thought 117 00:06:20,510 --> 00:06:22,939 of you being sealed up in this place when I'm not here. 118 00:06:22,974 --> 00:06:25,106 (PUMPING SPHYGMOMANOMETER BULB) Now shut up, I'm trying to... 119 00:06:30,850 --> 00:06:33,048 (RELEASES PRESSURE) (AIR HISSING) 120 00:06:34,623 --> 00:06:35,853 What? Hush. 121 00:06:40,860 --> 00:06:41,991 Tell me what you felt. 122 00:06:42,730 --> 00:06:44,796 Pain, in my chest. 123 00:06:44,831 --> 00:06:45,929 Hard to breathe. 124 00:06:46,899 --> 00:06:48,063 I couldn't intake air. 125 00:06:49,297 --> 00:06:51,264 (RIPS VELCRO) 126 00:06:51,299 --> 00:06:53,937 How are you sleeping? I'm not, really. 127 00:06:57,206 --> 00:06:58,546 Lean forward. 128 00:07:00,616 --> 00:07:01,780 (SIGHS) 129 00:07:02,717 --> 00:07:03,848 (MAN WHEEZES) 130 00:07:06,083 --> 00:07:07,753 You're wheezing. 131 00:07:07,788 --> 00:07:09,722 I always wheeze, Liz. 132 00:07:09,757 --> 00:07:10,954 You're wheezing more. 133 00:07:11,561 --> 00:07:12,857 Deep breath. 134 00:07:12,892 --> 00:07:15,497 (BREATHES DEEPLY WITH DIFFICULTY) 135 00:07:16,863 --> 00:07:18,665 That hurt? 136 00:07:18,700 --> 00:07:19,765 What was my blood pressure? 137 00:07:21,967 --> 00:07:24,033 Two-hundred and thirty-eight over 134. 138 00:07:29,942 --> 00:07:31,546 (CHUCKLING) Oh. 139 00:07:31,581 --> 00:07:32,679 Yeah. "Oh." 140 00:07:34,650 --> 00:07:35,649 (SIGHS) 141 00:07:36,146 --> 00:07:37,412 Hey, could you... 142 00:07:37,448 --> 00:07:39,785 I haven't been to the bathroom all day, I'm ready to explode. 143 00:07:52,030 --> 00:07:53,128 (GRUNTS) 144 00:07:54,901 --> 00:07:56,637 (EXHALES DEEPLY) 145 00:08:06,308 --> 00:08:07,945 (DRAWS CURTAIN) (LIGHT SWITCH CLICKS) 146 00:08:15,053 --> 00:08:16,624 (TRASH CAN LID CLOSES) 147 00:08:16,659 --> 00:08:18,659 (SIGHS) 148 00:08:18,694 --> 00:08:20,562 (MAN GRUNTS) LIZ: You need help in there? 149 00:08:21,631 --> 00:08:23,191 MAN: No, I'm fine. Sorry. 150 00:08:23,996 --> 00:08:25,600 What are you sorry about? 151 00:08:25,635 --> 00:08:28,801 I'm sorry. I don't know. Just sorry. 152 00:08:28,836 --> 00:08:30,165 MISSIONARY: I should go. LIZ: Thank you. 153 00:08:31,234 --> 00:08:33,234 You must be from New Life. 154 00:08:33,269 --> 00:08:35,104 You know Doug, from the church council? 155 00:08:36,272 --> 00:08:38,008 Yeah, I think so? 156 00:08:38,043 --> 00:08:39,339 I'm not entirely sure. 157 00:08:39,374 --> 00:08:40,615 I'm sort of new here, so... 158 00:08:41,013 --> 00:08:42,078 He's my dad. 159 00:08:44,049 --> 00:08:46,280 Doug and Cindy adopted me when I was a baby. 160 00:08:46,315 --> 00:08:47,853 Oh, that's great. 161 00:08:47,888 --> 00:08:49,789 I've never seen you there before, but, 162 00:08:49,824 --> 00:08:51,087 again I'm sort of new, so... 163 00:08:51,122 --> 00:08:53,661 (SIGHS) Fucking hate New Life. Oh. 164 00:08:53,696 --> 00:08:54,996 My dad forced me to go when I was a kid. 165 00:08:55,031 --> 00:08:58,963 It was awful, growing up with all that "end times" bullshit. 166 00:09:00,197 --> 00:09:02,197 (SIGHS) You're young. 167 00:09:03,266 --> 00:09:04,397 Why the hell would you want to believe 168 00:09:04,432 --> 00:09:06,003 that the world is about to end? 169 00:09:07,369 --> 00:09:09,809 I believe that when Christ returns, 170 00:09:09,844 --> 00:09:11,074 it's gonna be beautiful. 171 00:09:14,849 --> 00:09:15,980 Look, you can go. 172 00:09:17,445 --> 00:09:19,313 I know Charlie appreciates the help, 173 00:09:19,348 --> 00:09:21,986 but if you're here to convert him... 174 00:09:22,021 --> 00:09:23,218 Oh, we don't convert, 175 00:09:23,253 --> 00:09:24,219 our message is a message of hope 176 00:09:24,254 --> 00:09:27,255 for people of all... LIZ: People of all faiths. 177 00:09:27,290 --> 00:09:30,764 I know. You're sweet. (CLICKS LIGHTER) But... 178 00:09:33,769 --> 00:09:34,868 (SIGHS) 179 00:09:34,904 --> 00:09:36,968 Believe me, he doesn't want to hear about New Life. 180 00:09:38,202 --> 00:09:40,202 Why? 181 00:09:40,237 --> 00:09:41,874 Because it's caused him a lot of pain. 182 00:09:42,910 --> 00:09:43,909 How? 183 00:09:47,717 --> 00:09:48,716 It killed his boyfriend. 184 00:09:50,445 --> 00:09:51,983 (TOILET FLUSHES) 185 00:09:54,416 --> 00:09:56,416 You're saying the church... (SIGHS) 186 00:09:57,485 --> 00:10:00,024 Killed Charlie's boyfriend, yes. 187 00:10:01,192 --> 00:10:03,060 And I should add that New Life 188 00:10:03,095 --> 00:10:05,293 has caused me a lot of pain in my life. 189 00:10:05,328 --> 00:10:07,933 So, we don't need you coming over here, 190 00:10:07,968 --> 00:10:10,100 especially not now, not this week. 191 00:10:11,334 --> 00:10:13,004 Why? 192 00:10:13,039 --> 00:10:14,973 Because he probably won't be here next week. 193 00:10:15,844 --> 00:10:17,272 Where's he going? 194 00:10:17,307 --> 00:10:19,406 I'm sorry you had to come over, Liz. 195 00:10:20,783 --> 00:10:22,046 No, it's okay. 196 00:10:22,081 --> 00:10:24,950 I'm sorry that I always think I'm dying. 197 00:10:24,985 --> 00:10:28,118 Charlie, your blood pressure is 238 over 134. 198 00:10:28,153 --> 00:10:30,219 I'm sorry. Go to the hospital. 199 00:10:30,254 --> 00:10:32,023 I'm sorry. Stop saying you're sorry. 200 00:10:32,058 --> 00:10:33,255 Go to the hospital. 201 00:10:34,357 --> 00:10:35,961 You have congestive heart failure. 202 00:10:35,996 --> 00:10:37,259 If you don't go to the hospital, 203 00:10:37,294 --> 00:10:38,326 you'll be dead by the weekend. 204 00:10:40,099 --> 00:10:41,967 (STERNLY) You will die. 205 00:10:43,971 --> 00:10:45,234 CHARLIE: Well, then, I better get to work 206 00:10:45,269 --> 00:10:46,840 because I have a lot of essays this week. 207 00:10:46,875 --> 00:10:48,303 God damn it! 208 00:10:48,338 --> 00:10:51,746 I know. I'm sorry, I'm an awful person. I know. 209 00:10:53,178 --> 00:10:54,408 I'm sorry. 210 00:10:54,443 --> 00:10:55,909 (GRUNTS, PANTS) 211 00:10:55,945 --> 00:10:58,148 Did you still want to hear about Christ's message of love and salvation? 212 00:10:58,183 --> 00:10:59,281 No, he does not! 213 00:10:59,316 --> 00:11:00,315 MISSIONARY: Okay. Okay. 214 00:11:01,153 --> 00:11:02,152 I'll go. 215 00:11:04,387 --> 00:11:05,253 I still don't understand 216 00:11:05,288 --> 00:11:06,926 why you had me read that essay to you. 217 00:11:08,160 --> 00:11:09,764 It's a really good essay. 218 00:11:12,032 --> 00:11:13,933 LIZ: Goodbye. (CLOSES DOOR) 219 00:11:16,201 --> 00:11:18,806 Charlie, you have to go to the hospital. This has gone way too far. 220 00:11:18,841 --> 00:11:22,106 And rack up tens of thousands of dollars in hospital bills 221 00:11:22,141 --> 00:11:24,471 I'll never be able to pay back, ever. 222 00:11:24,506 --> 00:11:26,407 This affects me too, you know? 223 00:11:29,511 --> 00:11:30,510 You're my friend. 224 00:11:32,217 --> 00:11:33,216 I know. 225 00:11:35,055 --> 00:11:36,087 I'm sorry. 226 00:11:36,122 --> 00:11:37,255 You say you're sorry one more time, 227 00:11:37,290 --> 00:11:39,453 I will shove a knife right into you, I swear to God! 228 00:11:39,488 --> 00:11:41,829 Go ahead, what's it gonna do? 229 00:11:41,864 --> 00:11:43,325 My internal organs are two feet in, at least. 230 00:11:46,561 --> 00:11:48,528 (LAUGHING) 231 00:11:50,070 --> 00:11:51,300 (COUGHS) 232 00:11:51,335 --> 00:11:52,334 (WHIMPERS PLAYFULLY) 233 00:11:59,915 --> 00:12:01,508 I've been telling you this would happen. 234 00:12:01,543 --> 00:12:02,850 (SIGHS) I know. 235 00:12:05,448 --> 00:12:07,415 Haven't I been telling you? You have. 236 00:12:17,625 --> 00:12:20,032 NEWSCASTER 1: ...a new GOP presidential primary. 237 00:12:20,067 --> 00:12:21,767 However, they say absentee ballots 238 00:12:21,802 --> 00:12:24,267 are the lowest they've seen in recent history. NEWSCASTER 2: That's not good. 239 00:12:24,302 --> 00:12:26,368 NEWSCASTER 3: No, it's not. Get out and vote tomorrow. 240 00:12:26,403 --> 00:12:28,436 if you want to vote in the Republican primary. 241 00:12:28,471 --> 00:12:30,845 Our current polls do show, among Republicans,, 242 00:12:30,880 --> 00:12:33,177 30% favor Trump... Liz. 243 00:12:33,212 --> 00:12:34,578 NEWSCASTER 3: ...senator Ted Cruz, 244 00:12:34,614 --> 00:12:38,116 17% would vote for Florida senator Marco Rubio, 245 00:12:38,151 --> 00:12:40,954 and 5% for Ohio governor John Kasich. 246 00:12:40,989 --> 00:12:42,255 Liz. 247 00:12:42,291 --> 00:12:43,356 NEWSCASTER 3: ...for someone else, if they could. 248 00:12:43,392 --> 00:12:45,926 Below a percent that just don't know. 249 00:12:45,961 --> 00:12:47,527 NEWSCASTER 1: Meanwhile, Vermont senator Bernie Sanders 250 00:12:47,563 --> 00:12:50,865 is expected to win the Gem State on the Democratic side... 251 00:12:50,900 --> 00:12:51,766 Please. 252 00:12:51,801 --> 00:12:54,297 (NEWSCASTER 1 CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY) 253 00:13:19,291 --> 00:13:20,290 Thank you. 254 00:13:31,666 --> 00:13:33,534 (CRUNCHING) 255 00:13:43,117 --> 00:13:45,084 (LAUGHTER ON TV) 256 00:13:45,119 --> 00:13:47,383 Oh, I've seen this one, it's good. 257 00:13:47,418 --> 00:13:49,220 (INDISTINCT TV CHATTER) 258 00:13:53,028 --> 00:13:54,654 (RAIN PATTERING) 259 00:13:56,031 --> 00:13:58,031 (INDISTINCT TV CHATTER) 260 00:14:00,530 --> 00:14:02,497 (CHARLIE CHOKES, COUGHS) 261 00:14:03,368 --> 00:14:05,599 (COUGHING) 262 00:14:10,639 --> 00:14:12,078 (REMOTE CLICKS) (TV SWITCHES OFF) 263 00:14:15,347 --> 00:14:16,478 (BREATHES DEEPLY) 264 00:14:19,648 --> 00:14:21,923 (SOFT MUSIC PLAYING) 265 00:14:38,271 --> 00:14:42,306 CHARLIE: In the first part of his book, the author, 266 00:14:44,277 --> 00:14:46,013 calling himself Ishmael, 267 00:14:47,049 --> 00:14:52,448 is in a small seaside town 268 00:14:54,254 --> 00:14:55,385 and he is 269 00:14:57,455 --> 00:15:00,720 sharing a bed with a man 270 00:15:02,559 --> 00:15:04,064 named Queequeg. 271 00:15:08,400 --> 00:15:11,401 The author and Queequeg go to church, 272 00:15:12,404 --> 00:15:15,075 and later, they set out on a ship 273 00:15:15,110 --> 00:15:16,571 captained by the pirate named 274 00:15:18,344 --> 00:15:19,409 Ahab, 275 00:15:22,249 --> 00:15:24,414 who is missing a leg, 276 00:15:24,449 --> 00:15:27,285 and very much wants to kill the whale 277 00:15:29,553 --> 00:15:31,355 which is named Moby Dick, 278 00:15:32,457 --> 00:15:33,588 and which is white. 279 00:15:35,064 --> 00:15:37,460 In the course of the book, 280 00:15:37,495 --> 00:15:40,100 the pirate Ahab encounters many hardships. 281 00:15:41,268 --> 00:15:44,401 His entire life is set around 282 00:15:44,436 --> 00:15:47,041 trying to kill a certain whale. 283 00:15:47,076 --> 00:15:48,735 I think this is sad 284 00:15:48,770 --> 00:15:49,703 (GRUNTS) 285 00:15:49,738 --> 00:15:53,146 because the whale doesn't have any emotions. 286 00:15:55,315 --> 00:15:56,479 (GRUNTS) 287 00:15:56,778 --> 00:15:58,019 He's just 288 00:15:59,385 --> 00:16:00,714 a poor, big animal. 289 00:16:03,224 --> 00:16:07,688 And I feel bad for Ahab as well 290 00:16:09,362 --> 00:16:10,724 (GRUNTS) 291 00:16:10,759 --> 00:16:16,235 ...because he thinks that his life will be better 292 00:16:16,270 --> 00:16:19,403 if he can just kill this whale. 293 00:16:22,606 --> 00:16:24,738 But in reality, 294 00:16:25,378 --> 00:16:26,377 (GRUNTS) 295 00:16:28,216 --> 00:16:29,578 it won't help him at all. 296 00:16:31,582 --> 00:16:34,121 This book made me think 297 00:16:35,190 --> 00:16:36,321 about my own life. 298 00:16:39,821 --> 00:16:42,294 This book made me think about my own life. 299 00:16:42,329 --> 00:16:45,363 (OCEAN WAVES CRASHING) 300 00:16:45,398 --> 00:16:49,301 (SOFTLY) This book made me think about my own life. 301 00:17:38,781 --> 00:17:39,780 (SIGHS) 302 00:17:46,360 --> 00:17:47,656 (EXHALES) 303 00:17:50,199 --> 00:17:51,330 (TYPING) 304 00:18:02,541 --> 00:18:04,277 (TYPING) 305 00:18:18,623 --> 00:18:19,754 (SIGHS) 306 00:18:20,955 --> 00:18:22,658 (TYPING) 307 00:18:35,904 --> 00:18:36,936 (EXHALES) 308 00:18:56,397 --> 00:18:58,364 (WRAPPER CRINKLING) 309 00:19:00,632 --> 00:19:02,203 (BIRD CHIRPS) 310 00:19:04,867 --> 00:19:06,306 (CHIRPS) 311 00:19:20,520 --> 00:19:21,783 (SIGHS HEAVILY) 312 00:19:48,383 --> 00:19:49,877 (LINE RINGS) 313 00:19:50,880 --> 00:19:53,254 (CLEARS THROAT) (LINE CONNECTS) 314 00:20:30,656 --> 00:20:31,787 (KNOCK AT DOOR) 315 00:20:34,990 --> 00:20:36,924 (CHUCKLES QUIETLY) 316 00:20:36,959 --> 00:20:38,563 Does this mean now I'm gonna get fat? 317 00:20:39,632 --> 00:20:42,534 (GRUNTS) No, it doesn't. 318 00:20:43,669 --> 00:20:44,998 I was always big. 319 00:20:45,033 --> 00:20:46,065 I just... 320 00:20:46,969 --> 00:20:48,474 I let it get out of control. 321 00:20:49,906 --> 00:20:51,378 (CHARLIE EXHALES) 322 00:20:53,448 --> 00:20:56,713 So, was your mom okay with you coming over here? 323 00:20:57,683 --> 00:20:58,814 I didn't tell her. 324 00:21:01,852 --> 00:21:03,324 CHARLIE: It's really good to see you. 325 00:21:05,460 --> 00:21:06,558 You look beautiful. 326 00:21:09,530 --> 00:21:10,727 So, how's school? 327 00:21:11,565 --> 00:21:13,367 You're a senior, right? 328 00:21:13,402 --> 00:21:14,797 You actually care? 329 00:21:14,832 --> 00:21:16,832 Well, of course I care. 330 00:21:16,867 --> 00:21:18,537 I pester your mom for information 331 00:21:18,572 --> 00:21:19,802 as often as she'll give it to me. 332 00:21:21,905 --> 00:21:23,036 (CHARLIE EXHALES) 333 00:21:25,777 --> 00:21:26,776 Um... 334 00:21:28,450 --> 00:21:30,780 So... (GRUNTS) 335 00:21:30,815 --> 00:21:33,387 Why are you... I mean, don't you have school? 336 00:21:33,422 --> 00:21:34,850 Got suspended this morning. 337 00:21:35,589 --> 00:21:36,588 Oh. 338 00:21:37,426 --> 00:21:38,592 Why? 339 00:21:38,627 --> 00:21:40,790 I posted something about my stupid bitch lab partner 340 00:21:40,825 --> 00:21:43,056 that the vice principal said was "Vaguely threatening." 341 00:21:44,499 --> 00:21:45,729 (GRUNTS) 342 00:21:46,831 --> 00:21:47,962 You don't like school? 343 00:21:47,997 --> 00:21:49,469 Only idiots like high school. 344 00:21:50,868 --> 00:21:53,374 But you're on track to graduate, right? 345 00:21:55,202 --> 00:21:56,542 Counselor says I might not. 346 00:21:58,106 --> 00:21:59,380 I'm not worried. 347 00:22:00,911 --> 00:22:01,910 I'm a smart person. 348 00:22:02,814 --> 00:22:03,978 I never forget anything. 349 00:22:05,179 --> 00:22:06,915 High school is just bullshit. 350 00:22:06,950 --> 00:22:08,818 But, Ellie, it's important. 351 00:22:08,853 --> 00:22:09,886 If you don't graduate, then... 352 00:22:09,921 --> 00:22:11,623 Are you actually trying to parent me right now? 353 00:22:12,824 --> 00:22:14,527 No, I'm... Sorry. 354 00:22:14,826 --> 00:22:16,595 I just... 355 00:22:16,630 --> 00:22:18,729 I just thought that maybe we could spend some time with each other. 356 00:22:19,699 --> 00:22:20,929 I'm not spending time with you. 357 00:22:21,701 --> 00:22:22,700 You're disgusting. 358 00:22:28,169 --> 00:22:30,037 Well, I'm a lot bigger than I was 359 00:22:30,072 --> 00:22:31,138 since last time you saw me. 360 00:22:31,173 --> 00:22:33,711 ELLIE: No, I'm not talking about what you look like. 361 00:22:33,746 --> 00:22:35,647 You'd be disgusting even if you weren't this fat. 362 00:22:36,881 --> 00:22:38,848 You'd still be that piece-of-shit dad 363 00:22:38,883 --> 00:22:40,179 who walked out on me when I was eight. 364 00:22:41,688 --> 00:22:43,688 All because he wanted to fuck one of his students. 365 00:22:43,723 --> 00:22:44,755 Can I have one of these? 366 00:22:46,187 --> 00:22:46,986 Yeah. 367 00:22:50,829 --> 00:22:52,499 Look, it's... it's been a long time. 368 00:22:52,534 --> 00:22:53,995 I just thought that maybe 369 00:22:55,262 --> 00:22:56,734 we can get to know each other. 370 00:22:58,573 --> 00:22:59,704 I don't even know why I'm here. 371 00:23:00,674 --> 00:23:01,673 I can pay you. 372 00:23:06,548 --> 00:23:08,207 You want to pay me to spend time with you? 373 00:23:08,242 --> 00:23:10,242 And I can help you with your work. 374 00:23:10,277 --> 00:23:12,013 It's what I do for my job. 375 00:23:13,786 --> 00:23:15,082 I can help you pass your classes. 376 00:23:16,789 --> 00:23:18,822 You teach online? Yes. 377 00:23:18,857 --> 00:23:20,626 Your students know what you look like? 378 00:23:20,661 --> 00:23:22,562 I keep the camera shut off. 379 00:23:22,597 --> 00:23:24,025 Yeah, that's probably a good idea. 380 00:23:31,166 --> 00:23:33,199 My counselor says that if I show a lot of improvement 381 00:23:33,234 --> 00:23:34,640 in one subject, 382 00:23:34,675 --> 00:23:35,674 I might be able to graduate. 383 00:23:36,908 --> 00:23:39,172 You can rewrite these essays for English. 384 00:23:39,207 --> 00:23:40,745 They have to be really good, though. 385 00:23:44,586 --> 00:23:45,915 Well, look, um... 386 00:23:45,950 --> 00:23:47,719 I don't know if I should write them for you, 387 00:23:47,754 --> 00:23:48,819 but I can work with you on them. 388 00:23:48,854 --> 00:23:49,985 How much can you pay me? 389 00:23:51,120 --> 00:23:52,086 Everything I have. 390 00:23:52,121 --> 00:23:54,495 All the money I have in the bank. How much? 391 00:23:56,631 --> 00:23:59,896 $120,000? Something like that. I'd have to check. 392 00:24:01,603 --> 00:24:02,899 I never go out. 393 00:24:02,934 --> 00:24:06,067 All I pay for is food, rent, Internet. 394 00:24:06,839 --> 00:24:08,542 And I work all the time. 395 00:24:09,908 --> 00:24:11,006 And you'd give all of it to me? 396 00:24:12,614 --> 00:24:13,613 Not to my mom, to me? 397 00:24:15,243 --> 00:24:17,243 Yes. Just... 398 00:24:18,312 --> 00:24:19,817 don't tell your mom, 399 00:24:20,248 --> 00:24:21,247 all right? 400 00:24:22,888 --> 00:24:26,791 And maybe you could do some writing just for me. 401 00:24:27,596 --> 00:24:28,892 Why? 402 00:24:28,927 --> 00:24:31,730 Because you're a smart person. 403 00:24:31,765 --> 00:24:33,864 And I bet you'd make a strong writer. 404 00:24:36,099 --> 00:24:37,802 Plus, I'm a teacher. I want to make sure 405 00:24:37,837 --> 00:24:39,672 you're getting something out of this. 406 00:24:42,776 --> 00:24:45,073 (ZIPS BAG) I don't even understand you. 407 00:24:56,020 --> 00:24:57,250 Stand up and walk over to me. 408 00:24:58,726 --> 00:24:59,857 What? 409 00:24:59,892 --> 00:25:01,727 Come over here. Walk toward me. 410 00:25:05,326 --> 00:25:07,095 No. No. Without this thing. 411 00:25:08,802 --> 00:25:10,703 Stand up and walk over here. 412 00:25:13,136 --> 00:25:14,575 Ellie, I can't really... Shut up! 413 00:25:16,271 --> 00:25:17,644 Come over here. 414 00:25:23,278 --> 00:25:24,651 (CHARLIE SIGHS) 415 00:25:30,417 --> 00:25:31,724 (EXHALES HEAVILY) 416 00:25:32,254 --> 00:25:33,253 (BREATHES DEEPLY) 417 00:25:38,898 --> 00:25:40,733 (GRUNTS WITH EXERTION) 418 00:25:40,768 --> 00:25:42,295 (GRUNTS, GROANS) 419 00:25:42,935 --> 00:25:45,870 (PANTING) 420 00:25:48,237 --> 00:25:50,611 (HUFFING) 421 00:25:51,405 --> 00:25:54,208 (GRUNTS) 422 00:25:58,346 --> 00:25:59,686 (CHARLIE YELLS) 423 00:26:00,183 --> 00:26:01,886 (GROANING LOUDLY) 424 00:26:03,021 --> 00:26:04,988 (GROANING IN PAIN) 425 00:26:09,159 --> 00:26:11,159 (PANTING) 426 00:26:13,328 --> 00:26:15,229 (DOG BARKS OUTSIDE) 427 00:26:21,072 --> 00:26:22,940 (WHISPERING) "...celebrate my soul. 428 00:26:24,075 --> 00:26:25,778 "Sell my soul." 429 00:26:25,813 --> 00:26:26,977 (KNOCK AT DOOR) 430 00:26:27,474 --> 00:26:28,715 MAN: Gambino's! 431 00:26:29,476 --> 00:26:30,783 Yeah, you can, um... 432 00:26:31,918 --> 00:26:33,346 I put a $20 in the mailbox. 433 00:26:34,822 --> 00:26:35,854 MAN: Sure. 434 00:26:39,453 --> 00:26:41,926 You can just leave it on the... 435 00:26:41,961 --> 00:26:44,192 MAN: Yeah, I, uh... I remember. 436 00:26:46,328 --> 00:26:47,668 Everything okay in there? 437 00:26:52,301 --> 00:26:53,300 Yeah. 438 00:26:55,106 --> 00:26:56,138 MAN: You sure? 439 00:26:56,943 --> 00:26:57,942 Yeah. 440 00:26:58,813 --> 00:26:59,845 I'm fine. 441 00:27:02,278 --> 00:27:03,277 Thank you. 442 00:27:05,248 --> 00:27:06,247 (METAL CLACKS) 443 00:27:07,118 --> 00:27:08,722 (FOOTSTEPS) 444 00:27:12,024 --> 00:27:13,122 (CHUCKLES LIGHTLY) 445 00:27:20,362 --> 00:27:21,801 (CAR ENGINE STARTS) 446 00:27:46,960 --> 00:27:48,795 Breathe slowly. (DEVICE BEEPS) 447 00:27:48,830 --> 00:27:50,126 (INHALES) 448 00:27:50,161 --> 00:27:51,193 Relax. 449 00:27:51,228 --> 00:27:52,327 (EXHALES) (DEVICE BEEPS) 450 00:27:52,363 --> 00:27:55,494 It measures perspiration. It's an indicator of stress. 451 00:27:55,529 --> 00:27:56,935 It's about establishing a relationship 452 00:27:56,970 --> 00:27:58,200 between your brain and your body. 453 00:27:58,235 --> 00:27:59,773 If you know how to make yourself calm, 454 00:27:59,808 --> 00:28:00,939 then your blood pressure will... 455 00:28:00,974 --> 00:28:03,040 (DEVICE BEEPS) Here. 456 00:28:03,075 --> 00:28:05,075 I don't need a little machine to tell me 457 00:28:05,110 --> 00:28:07,539 to take a few deep breaths and stop sweating. 458 00:28:07,574 --> 00:28:09,915 Well, apparently, you fucking do. 459 00:28:09,950 --> 00:28:12,544 (DEVICE BEEPS) Take another deep breath. 460 00:28:12,579 --> 00:28:15,250 (BREATHES DEEPLY) (DEVICE BEEPS) 461 00:28:15,285 --> 00:28:16,350 Thank you. 462 00:28:18,321 --> 00:28:19,925 (CHARLIE EXHALES DEEPLY) 463 00:28:19,960 --> 00:28:22,191 (LIZ SIGHS) 464 00:28:22,226 --> 00:28:26,294 We're just gonna try some different methods, or whatever. 465 00:28:26,329 --> 00:28:29,935 If you refuse to go to the hospital, then you'll... 466 00:28:31,070 --> 00:28:32,135 I don't know. 467 00:28:40,244 --> 00:28:41,408 Where'd this come from? 468 00:28:41,443 --> 00:28:42,948 (DEVICE CONTINUES BEEPING) 469 00:28:46,415 --> 00:28:47,414 Hey. 470 00:28:50,859 --> 00:28:51,858 Was she here? 471 00:28:55,061 --> 00:28:57,061 No, I don't like this. 472 00:28:57,096 --> 00:28:59,228 This isn't a good idea. 473 00:28:59,263 --> 00:29:01,197 You know you're not supposed to be around her. 474 00:29:02,497 --> 00:29:03,837 Does her mom know about this? 475 00:29:03,872 --> 00:29:05,267 I just wanted to see her. 476 00:29:05,302 --> 00:29:07,302 Mary has kept her from me all this time. 477 00:29:07,337 --> 00:29:10,008 Why do you suddenly need to see her so bad, why now? 478 00:29:10,043 --> 00:29:11,042 Liz. 479 00:29:14,982 --> 00:29:16,080 (LIZ SIGHS) 480 00:29:18,216 --> 00:29:20,084 Why the hell do you have her homework, anyway? 481 00:29:20,988 --> 00:29:24,484 Look, I didn't plan for this. 482 00:29:24,519 --> 00:29:26,222 She needs some help at school, 483 00:29:26,257 --> 00:29:28,587 so I'm gonna help her with a few essays. 484 00:29:28,622 --> 00:29:29,755 (LIZ SCOFFS) 485 00:29:29,790 --> 00:29:31,865 You haven't seen her since she was eight years old, 486 00:29:31,900 --> 00:29:32,998 and you're gonna reconnect with her 487 00:29:33,033 --> 00:29:34,593 by doing her homework for her? 488 00:29:34,628 --> 00:29:36,133 It's fine. It's not fine. 489 00:29:39,006 --> 00:29:40,841 She shouldn't be around you when you're like this. 490 00:29:42,108 --> 00:29:44,636 What if something happens, what if you need help? 491 00:29:44,671 --> 00:29:46,176 (DEVICE BEEPING RAPIDLY) 492 00:29:46,211 --> 00:29:47,375 Charlie, calm down. 493 00:29:48,378 --> 00:29:50,048 Hey. No. (BEEPING STOPS) 494 00:29:52,580 --> 00:29:54,019 Okay. Forget it, then. 495 00:29:55,319 --> 00:29:57,352 I'm worried about her. Why? 496 00:30:00,093 --> 00:30:01,554 Oh, you're spying on her now? 497 00:30:03,294 --> 00:30:05,162 It doesn't look like she has any friends. 498 00:30:09,333 --> 00:30:10,365 I don't think this is... 499 00:30:15,174 --> 00:30:17,339 (CHARLIE SCOFFS) Come on, a dead dog? 500 00:30:23,952 --> 00:30:25,413 I'm worried that she's forgotten 501 00:30:25,448 --> 00:30:27,283 what an amazing person she is. 502 00:30:32,521 --> 00:30:34,356 She's just a teenager. 503 00:30:34,391 --> 00:30:36,424 Everyone is insane when they're a teenager. 504 00:30:36,459 --> 00:30:37,358 When I was her age, 505 00:30:37,394 --> 00:30:39,130 when my dad would really piss me off... 506 00:30:41,035 --> 00:30:43,134 I'm just lucky I didn't get arrested, that's all I'll say. 507 00:30:46,535 --> 00:30:47,567 Point is, 508 00:30:49,571 --> 00:30:52,077 bringing her over here is a bad idea. 509 00:30:52,112 --> 00:30:54,112 You have enough to deal with right now, you hear me? 510 00:30:55,643 --> 00:30:57,280 Do not bring her over here again. 511 00:30:58,052 --> 00:30:59,150 Okay. 512 00:31:00,516 --> 00:31:01,515 Okay. 513 00:31:06,621 --> 00:31:09,127 It's not like she's alone, you know. She has her mom. 514 00:31:15,201 --> 00:31:17,531 LIZ: Ugh, shit. I have to go soon. 515 00:31:19,007 --> 00:31:21,205 I hate these night shifts. (UTENSILS CLACKING) 516 00:31:21,240 --> 00:31:25,275 It's just a steady parade of dumb, drunk college kids. 517 00:31:25,310 --> 00:31:26,507 (FAUCET RUNS) 518 00:31:27,609 --> 00:31:29,378 (LAUGHING) Did I tell you about this girl 519 00:31:29,413 --> 00:31:31,380 from a few nights ago? (GAGS) 520 00:31:31,415 --> 00:31:33,987 The puke was bright purple, I swear. 521 00:31:34,022 --> 00:31:36,451 (CHOKING) (LIZ LAUGHING) 522 00:31:36,486 --> 00:31:37,485 I mean, what is that? 523 00:31:37,521 --> 00:31:40,356 Why can't these kids just drink beer? You know. 524 00:31:41,755 --> 00:31:44,063 Are you choking? (CONTINUES CHOKING) 525 00:31:44,098 --> 00:31:46,296 Oh, God! Okay, lean on that arm. 526 00:31:47,068 --> 00:31:48,067 Lean on that arm! 527 00:31:49,037 --> 00:31:50,399 Okay, I need you to rock with me. 528 00:31:51,237 --> 00:31:53,270 (GRUNTS) (CHOKES) 529 00:31:53,305 --> 00:31:54,634 (GRUNTS) (CHARLIE GASPS) 530 00:31:55,571 --> 00:31:56,603 (LIZ YELLS) 531 00:31:56,638 --> 00:31:59,012 (COUGHS, WHEEZES) 532 00:31:59,047 --> 00:32:01,707 (COUGHING, WHEEZING) 533 00:32:01,742 --> 00:32:03,742 (GASPING) 534 00:32:04,778 --> 00:32:06,415 I'm okay. (GASPS) 535 00:32:07,550 --> 00:32:11,354 I'm okay. (GASPS) 536 00:32:11,389 --> 00:32:14,027 (SHOUTS) God damn it, Charlie, what is wrong with you? 537 00:32:14,062 --> 00:32:14,961 (HITS) 538 00:32:14,997 --> 00:32:17,195 Chew your food like a normal human being! 539 00:32:17,230 --> 00:32:19,131 You could have just died right in front of me! 540 00:32:19,166 --> 00:32:20,165 I'm sorry. 541 00:32:21,234 --> 00:32:24,136 (CHARLIE WHIMPERS AND SOBS) 542 00:32:26,239 --> 00:32:27,271 I'm sorry, Liz. 543 00:32:39,384 --> 00:32:40,416 (OBJECT CLACKS) 544 00:32:47,590 --> 00:32:48,721 (LIZ EXHALES) 545 00:32:55,532 --> 00:32:56,531 It's okay. 546 00:33:20,623 --> 00:33:22,755 CHARLIE: I read through some of the posts 547 00:33:22,790 --> 00:33:25,725 in the class discussion forum this morning. 548 00:33:25,760 --> 00:33:28,266 In particular, a post 549 00:33:28,301 --> 00:33:32,534 about crafting a good thesis, and I quote, 550 00:33:32,569 --> 00:33:34,734 "Just pick a sentence from the reading 551 00:33:34,769 --> 00:33:37,275 "and say, 'It's good,' or some shit." 552 00:33:37,310 --> 00:33:40,344 Listen, at this point in the course, 553 00:33:40,379 --> 00:33:43,413 I have given you all that I can, 554 00:33:43,448 --> 00:33:46,779 in terms of structure, building a thesis, 555 00:33:46,814 --> 00:33:48,418 paragraph organization. 556 00:33:49,619 --> 00:33:52,488 But if all of that isn't built 557 00:33:52,523 --> 00:33:55,359 on your own original ideas and truthful analysis, 558 00:33:55,394 --> 00:33:56,690 it doesn't mean anything. 559 00:33:58,430 --> 00:34:00,628 Think about that as you write and revise. 560 00:34:00,663 --> 00:34:03,301 Think about the truth of your argument. 561 00:34:04,766 --> 00:34:08,735 I know this may sound silly, but it's important. 562 00:34:10,376 --> 00:34:12,805 Promise, it's important. 563 00:34:16,415 --> 00:34:17,810 (BIRD CHIRPING) 564 00:34:32,497 --> 00:34:34,563 (BREATHING HEAVILY) 565 00:34:43,607 --> 00:34:44,639 (STRAINING) 566 00:34:45,411 --> 00:34:46,575 (KEY CLATTERS) 567 00:34:53,584 --> 00:34:56,354 (GRUNTING SOFTLY) 568 00:35:04,958 --> 00:35:06,232 (KEY CLACKS) 569 00:35:07,928 --> 00:35:09,202 (CLAW CLICKS) 570 00:35:17,542 --> 00:35:19,509 (MUTTERING INDISTINCTLY) 571 00:35:22,481 --> 00:35:23,612 (SIGHS) 572 00:35:31,886 --> 00:35:34,524 This is... (EXHALES) 573 00:35:34,559 --> 00:35:37,197 You say that Walt Whitman wrote Song for Myself. 574 00:35:37,529 --> 00:35:38,726 Yeah? 575 00:35:38,761 --> 00:35:40,497 It's called Song of Myself. 576 00:35:42,336 --> 00:35:43,368 My title's better. 577 00:35:45,537 --> 00:35:46,536 Yeah. 578 00:35:47,572 --> 00:35:48,571 Well... 579 00:35:49,508 --> 00:35:50,540 Okay, I'll just change it. 580 00:35:52,346 --> 00:35:54,709 "The poem Song of Myself 581 00:35:54,744 --> 00:35:56,711 "is in a book called Leaves of Grass. 582 00:35:56,746 --> 00:35:58,416 "It was written by Walt Whitman 583 00:35:58,451 --> 00:36:00,616 "and was published in 1855. 584 00:36:00,651 --> 00:36:02,585 "He paid for the first publication himself." 585 00:36:02,620 --> 00:36:05,621 You don't have to read it out loud. Just rewrite it. 586 00:36:05,656 --> 00:36:07,689 You're supposed to analyze the poem. 587 00:36:07,724 --> 00:36:09,262 This is just a list of facts. 588 00:36:09,297 --> 00:36:11,462 Yup. Thank you, Wikipedia. 589 00:36:13,026 --> 00:36:14,729 (SMACKS LIPS) 590 00:36:14,764 --> 00:36:16,566 You know, it's really an amazing poem. 591 00:36:16,601 --> 00:36:20,372 Whitman uses the metaphor of "I" not to refer to himself, 592 00:36:20,407 --> 00:36:23,969 but to explode the very definition of self 593 00:36:24,004 --> 00:36:26,477 in favor of a more all-encompassing... 594 00:36:26,512 --> 00:36:27,808 I really, really don't care. 595 00:36:32,485 --> 00:36:34,716 You know, I think you might like it if you actually read it. 596 00:36:35,851 --> 00:36:38,489 You're just like my teachers. 597 00:36:38,524 --> 00:36:40,887 You think just because I'm not losing my shit over the poem, 598 00:36:40,922 --> 00:36:42,361 it's because I didn't read it. 599 00:36:42,396 --> 00:36:43,362 I did read it. 600 00:36:43,397 --> 00:36:46,024 It's overwritten, and dumb, and repetitive. 601 00:36:46,059 --> 00:36:48,697 And even though he thinks his metaphor of "I" is deep, 602 00:36:48,732 --> 00:36:50,600 it's actually just a bunch of bullshit. 603 00:36:50,635 --> 00:36:51,568 And, in reality, 604 00:36:51,603 --> 00:36:54,835 he's just some worthless 19th century faggot. 605 00:36:57,378 --> 00:36:59,807 That's an interesting perspective. 606 00:36:59,842 --> 00:37:01,578 It would make for an interesting essay. 607 00:37:03,978 --> 00:37:07,045 Just write that thing about exploding the definition of self. 608 00:37:07,080 --> 00:37:08,519 My English teacher will love it. 609 00:37:13,086 --> 00:37:14,426 (CHARLIE SIGHS) 610 00:37:16,991 --> 00:37:19,827 So, how's your mom doing? Oh, my God. 611 00:37:21,567 --> 00:37:23,831 Look, if you're not gonna write these essays for me, then... 612 00:37:23,866 --> 00:37:27,604 CHARLIE: Ellie, I don't need you here to write these essays for you. 613 00:37:27,639 --> 00:37:29,309 If you want to go, you can go. 614 00:37:30,642 --> 00:37:31,740 You can still have the money. 615 00:37:34,580 --> 00:37:36,910 I thought you wanted to get to know me. I do, 616 00:37:36,945 --> 00:37:38,549 but I don't want to force you to be here. 617 00:37:40,388 --> 00:37:41,453 It's up to you. 618 00:37:44,986 --> 00:37:45,985 (PUTS BAG DOWN) 619 00:37:47,560 --> 00:37:48,559 She's fine. 620 00:37:49,529 --> 00:37:50,627 Mom. I guess. 621 00:37:51,762 --> 00:37:54,026 She happy? When she drinks. 622 00:37:55,964 --> 00:37:58,569 You guys still live in that duplex over on Orchard? 623 00:37:59,671 --> 00:38:00,736 You don't even know where we live? 624 00:38:03,708 --> 00:38:04,707 You don't stay in touch with Mom? 625 00:38:04,743 --> 00:38:08,381 Yeah, I check in with her as often as she lets me. 626 00:38:08,416 --> 00:38:09,844 She really only tells me things about you. 627 00:38:10,814 --> 00:38:12,077 Why? 628 00:38:12,112 --> 00:38:13,881 Because that's all I want to know about. 629 00:38:20,153 --> 00:38:21,394 When I was 11, 630 00:38:21,429 --> 00:38:22,791 we moved to the other side of town, 631 00:38:23,662 --> 00:38:24,760 near the Walmart. 632 00:38:25,466 --> 00:38:26,465 Is your mother 633 00:38:27,567 --> 00:38:29,567 with anyone right now? No. 634 00:38:30,438 --> 00:38:32,130 Why, you interested? 635 00:38:32,165 --> 00:38:34,737 (CHUCKLES) No, of course not. 636 00:38:42,648 --> 00:38:44,043 Why'd you gain all that weight? 637 00:38:44,078 --> 00:38:45,344 (INHALES DEEPLY) I don't... 638 00:38:45,380 --> 00:38:47,618 If you're gonna interrogate me, I'm gonna do the same thing. 639 00:38:50,051 --> 00:38:51,149 Why'd you gain all that weight? 640 00:38:55,595 --> 00:38:58,959 Someone close to me passed away, and it... 641 00:38:59,797 --> 00:39:01,995 It had an effect on me. 642 00:39:02,030 --> 00:39:03,029 Your boyfriend. 643 00:39:04,164 --> 00:39:06,868 My partner. Your student. 644 00:39:06,903 --> 00:39:09,035 He wasn't that young. It was a night school course. 645 00:39:09,070 --> 00:39:10,102 ELLIE: Oh, I remember him. 646 00:39:11,644 --> 00:39:12,742 You had him over for dinner once 647 00:39:12,777 --> 00:39:14,711 when Mom was in Montana, visiting Grandma. 648 00:39:16,550 --> 00:39:17,648 You made steaks. 649 00:39:18,651 --> 00:39:20,145 The good kind. 650 00:39:20,180 --> 00:39:23,115 Better meal than you ever made for me or Mom. 651 00:39:23,150 --> 00:39:25,656 I remember hearing you two talk after I went to bed. 652 00:39:28,958 --> 00:39:30,727 How do you remember all that? 653 00:39:30,762 --> 00:39:33,026 I told you, I never forget anything. 654 00:39:43,203 --> 00:39:44,202 How did he die? 655 00:39:46,206 --> 00:39:48,514 I... I don't... I'm... 656 00:39:48,549 --> 00:39:50,813 I really don't want to talk about that right now, 657 00:39:52,080 --> 00:39:53,585 if that's all right with you. 658 00:39:58,658 --> 00:40:00,658 (CELL PHONE KEYS CLACKING) 659 00:40:05,225 --> 00:40:06,697 I'll write these essays for you. 660 00:40:08,602 --> 00:40:11,768 I want you to do some writing, just for me. 661 00:40:12,804 --> 00:40:14,639 I hate writing essays. 662 00:40:14,674 --> 00:40:16,234 Just think about the poem for a while, 663 00:40:17,237 --> 00:40:18,236 and write something. 664 00:40:20,944 --> 00:40:22,845 Be honest. 665 00:40:22,880 --> 00:40:24,946 Tell me what you really think. 666 00:40:24,981 --> 00:40:26,684 You want me to write what I really think? 667 00:40:28,182 --> 00:40:29,247 I'll be right back. 668 00:40:30,591 --> 00:40:32,624 Just write whatever you want. 669 00:40:35,222 --> 00:40:38,597 (CHARLIE GROANING WITH EXERTION) 670 00:40:40,931 --> 00:40:42,029 (SIGHS HEAVILY) 671 00:40:43,164 --> 00:40:45,604 (CONTINUES GROANING) 672 00:40:45,639 --> 00:40:48,970 (BREATHING HEAVILY) 673 00:41:21,642 --> 00:41:23,037 (WATER RUNNING) 674 00:41:25,646 --> 00:41:27,745 (SUPPRESSED SOBBING) 675 00:41:28,341 --> 00:41:30,880 (MUFFLED SOBBING) 676 00:41:30,915 --> 00:41:32,750 (WATER CONTINUES RUNNING) 677 00:41:34,116 --> 00:41:36,589 Are you okay? 678 00:41:36,624 --> 00:41:38,250 Unless you're dying, there's no way I'm going in there. 679 00:41:38,285 --> 00:41:39,823 (SNIFFLES) 680 00:41:39,858 --> 00:41:42,089 (EXHALES) Oh, yeah. I'm fine. I'm fine. 681 00:41:48,900 --> 00:41:50,702 (BRID WINGS FLAPPING) 682 00:41:58,844 --> 00:42:00,041 (KNOCK AT DOOR) 683 00:42:01,275 --> 00:42:03,045 (WATER RUNNING) (KNOCKING CONTINUES) 684 00:42:06,918 --> 00:42:08,247 Hi. 685 00:42:08,282 --> 00:42:09,820 I was looking for Charlie? 686 00:42:10,416 --> 00:42:11,657 He's in the bathroom. 687 00:42:12,319 --> 00:42:13,725 Oh, I can come back. 688 00:42:19,128 --> 00:42:20,963 Are you his friend, or... 689 00:42:20,998 --> 00:42:22,294 I'm his daughter. 690 00:42:22,329 --> 00:42:24,835 Oh. Are you surprised? 691 00:42:25,838 --> 00:42:26,937 Yeah, I guess. 692 00:42:26,973 --> 00:42:28,938 What's more surprising? That a gay guy has a daughter, 693 00:42:28,973 --> 00:42:30,610 or that someone actually found his penis? 694 00:42:33,274 --> 00:42:34,273 I'm kidding. 695 00:42:35,342 --> 00:42:36,374 Jesus. 696 00:42:37,311 --> 00:42:38,510 Um... 697 00:42:38,546 --> 00:42:41,379 Charlie was interested in hearing more about my church, 698 00:42:41,414 --> 00:42:42,280 and I brought some literature... 699 00:42:42,315 --> 00:42:44,987 Are you Mormon? No, I'm from New Life. 700 00:42:45,022 --> 00:42:47,693 Oh. That end times cult thing. 701 00:42:47,728 --> 00:42:49,662 (POURS JUICE) It's not a cult. 702 00:42:49,697 --> 00:42:51,389 Tell you one thing that I like about religion. 703 00:42:51,424 --> 00:42:52,863 What I like about religion 704 00:42:52,898 --> 00:42:54,997 is that it assumes that everyone is an idiot 705 00:42:55,032 --> 00:42:56,966 and that they're all incapable of saving themselves. 706 00:42:57,001 --> 00:42:58,704 I think they got something right with that. 707 00:42:58,739 --> 00:42:59,870 I don't think like that... 708 00:42:59,905 --> 00:43:01,740 What I don't like about religion 709 00:43:01,775 --> 00:43:04,204 is that when people accept Jesus or whatever, 710 00:43:04,239 --> 00:43:05,876 they suddenly think that they're better 711 00:43:05,911 --> 00:43:06,977 than everyone else. (CHARLIE GRUNTING) 712 00:43:07,012 --> 00:43:09,176 By accepting the fact that they're stupid sinners, 713 00:43:09,211 --> 00:43:12,410 somehow they've become better, and they turn into assholes. 714 00:43:14,986 --> 00:43:16,216 I don't really know what to say. 715 00:43:16,251 --> 00:43:18,218 I have some pamphlets that I think would... 716 00:43:18,253 --> 00:43:20,088 (CAMERA CLICKS) Why did you just do that? 717 00:43:20,123 --> 00:43:21,793 Are you coming back tomorrow? 718 00:43:21,828 --> 00:43:23,223 I'm not sure... Come back tomorrow. 719 00:43:23,258 --> 00:43:25,258 I'll be here around the same time. 720 00:43:25,293 --> 00:43:26,897 I'm sorry, what's happening? 721 00:43:27,460 --> 00:43:28,833 (CAMERA CLICKS) 722 00:43:29,297 --> 00:43:30,868 Oh! 723 00:43:30,903 --> 00:43:32,837 Hi. I was just coming over 724 00:43:32,872 --> 00:43:34,036 to share these pamphlets with you. 725 00:43:34,071 --> 00:43:35,169 You'll have those done by tomorrow? 726 00:43:36,040 --> 00:43:37,039 Sure. 727 00:43:37,811 --> 00:43:39,140 Five-page minimum. 728 00:43:39,175 --> 00:43:40,405 It'll be good, I promise. 729 00:43:43,751 --> 00:43:45,344 I'm Ellie. Thomas. 730 00:43:46,215 --> 00:43:48,281 (BREATHES HEAVILY) 731 00:43:49,350 --> 00:43:50,690 (SLAMS DOOR SHUT) 732 00:43:54,289 --> 00:43:55,322 So... 733 00:43:55,357 --> 00:43:57,928 Christ's return has been promised for centuries. 734 00:43:57,963 --> 00:43:59,325 But there are a lot of clues in Scripture 735 00:43:59,360 --> 00:44:00,526 that suggest it's imminent. 736 00:44:00,561 --> 00:44:02,933 So, that means we don't have time to deny the Gospel, 737 00:44:02,968 --> 00:44:04,132 we don't have... Do you really think 738 00:44:04,167 --> 00:44:06,365 that the world's gonna end soon? 739 00:44:06,400 --> 00:44:08,367 Well, the Bible says that no one shall know the day 740 00:44:08,402 --> 00:44:09,907 or the hour, but, 741 00:44:09,942 --> 00:44:11,370 yeah, I think we're probably living in end times. 742 00:44:12,538 --> 00:44:13,944 And that doesn't bother you? 743 00:44:13,979 --> 00:44:15,341 No. It's the idea 744 00:44:15,376 --> 00:44:18,014 that a better world is coming to replace this one. 745 00:44:18,049 --> 00:44:20,412 That everything terrible about this country, 746 00:44:20,447 --> 00:44:22,282 this planet, is gonna be wiped clean, 747 00:44:22,317 --> 00:44:25,186 and replaced with something pure and holy, and... 748 00:44:25,221 --> 00:44:27,122 I'm sorry. I don't mean to be rude, 749 00:44:27,157 --> 00:44:29,025 but I know all this. 750 00:44:29,830 --> 00:44:31,093 What do you mean? 751 00:44:31,128 --> 00:44:33,359 I have probably read everything 752 00:44:33,394 --> 00:44:36,329 New Life Church has ever written. 753 00:44:36,364 --> 00:44:39,365 Probably every pamphlet they've ever published. 754 00:44:39,400 --> 00:44:41,873 Wow, that's great and everything, 755 00:44:41,908 --> 00:44:43,875 but these tracts are just the beginning. 756 00:44:43,910 --> 00:44:46,108 There's so much more in the Bible that we can... I read the Bible. 757 00:44:47,111 --> 00:44:48,440 Really? 758 00:44:48,475 --> 00:44:50,409 Sure. Couple times. 759 00:44:51,951 --> 00:44:53,412 Did you like it? 760 00:44:53,447 --> 00:44:55,953 I thought it was devastating. 761 00:44:55,988 --> 00:44:58,824 God creates us, expels us from paradise. 762 00:44:58,859 --> 00:45:01,827 We wander around for thousands of years killing each other, 763 00:45:01,862 --> 00:45:04,863 before He comes back and saves 144,000 of us. 764 00:45:04,898 --> 00:45:08,097 Meanwhile, seven- and-a-half billion of us fall into hell. 765 00:45:10,398 --> 00:45:12,431 Yeah. 766 00:45:12,466 --> 00:45:14,433 That's not really how I interpret it, but... 767 00:45:16,074 --> 00:45:17,876 Charlie, you have to understand, 768 00:45:18,945 --> 00:45:21,341 God hasn't turned His back on you. 769 00:45:21,376 --> 00:45:24,212 If you accept Him, He'll release you from this. 770 00:45:24,247 --> 00:45:25,576 (SIPPING) He'll take your soul 771 00:45:25,611 --> 00:45:27,952 out of this body and give you a brand-new body. 772 00:45:27,987 --> 00:45:30,119 One made of pure light. I mean, don't you want that? 773 00:45:30,154 --> 00:45:33,221 I'm not interested in being saved. 774 00:45:33,256 --> 00:45:34,893 (SIGHS) I appreciate what you did 775 00:45:34,928 --> 00:45:37,060 the other day, but you can go. 776 00:45:37,095 --> 00:45:38,589 This doesn't sound like something that I... 777 00:45:38,624 --> 00:45:41,361 Look, I really think that God brought me here for a reason. 778 00:45:41,396 --> 00:45:43,363 There's a reason why I knocked on your door 779 00:45:43,398 --> 00:45:45,398 right when you needed someone the most. 780 00:45:45,433 --> 00:45:48,434 Isn't there any way I can help? 781 00:45:48,469 --> 00:45:49,568 I mean, that's the entire reason 782 00:45:49,604 --> 00:45:51,602 why I became a missionary in the first place, right? 783 00:45:51,637 --> 00:45:53,274 There's something you can do for me. 784 00:45:57,511 --> 00:46:00,512 What? Um, nothing I just... 785 00:46:00,547 --> 00:46:04,923 I hope you know I wasn't talking about, um... 786 00:46:05,486 --> 00:46:07,618 What? I'm not... 787 00:46:07,653 --> 00:46:09,587 Oh, my God. I'm... I'm sorry. I just... 788 00:46:09,622 --> 00:46:10,995 No. With what you were watching 789 00:46:11,030 --> 00:46:12,095 the first time I came in here, I just... 790 00:46:12,130 --> 00:46:14,229 (CHUCKLES) I am not attracted to you. 791 00:46:14,264 --> 00:46:17,463 Please, you gotta believe me when I say I'm not attracted to you. 792 00:46:17,498 --> 00:46:18,530 You're a fetus. 793 00:46:21,337 --> 00:46:22,534 I'm sorry. 794 00:46:24,208 --> 00:46:25,273 (SIGHS) 795 00:46:29,378 --> 00:46:31,378 Thomas, tell me the truth. 796 00:46:34,383 --> 00:46:35,481 You find me disgusting? 797 00:46:38,926 --> 00:46:39,925 No. 798 00:46:42,490 --> 00:46:43,621 I just want to help. 799 00:46:44,657 --> 00:46:46,558 Please, just let me help. 800 00:46:56,042 --> 00:46:58,306 (GRUNTS SOFTLY) 801 00:46:58,341 --> 00:47:00,407 Thank you. That's very helpful. 802 00:47:07,350 --> 00:47:09,955 What happened to your... Sorry. Your friend, Liz, 803 00:47:09,990 --> 00:47:12,419 she said that your boyfriend, 804 00:47:12,454 --> 00:47:14,355 he used to go to New Life? (DOOR OPENS) 805 00:47:16,964 --> 00:47:18,194 LIZ: Charlie? Yeah. 806 00:47:19,065 --> 00:47:21,032 I got you this. 807 00:47:21,067 --> 00:47:22,528 I did some asking around, and... 808 00:47:24,730 --> 00:47:26,532 What the fuck is he doing here? 809 00:47:26,567 --> 00:47:28,270 He's just helping me with something. 810 00:47:28,305 --> 00:47:29,634 Take it easy, Liz. 811 00:47:29,669 --> 00:47:32,043 Okay, well, you can go now. 812 00:47:32,474 --> 00:47:33,473 Liz. 813 00:47:34,641 --> 00:47:35,640 Go home! 814 00:47:36,984 --> 00:47:38,445 Sorry. I'm sorry. Leave it. 815 00:47:38,480 --> 00:47:40,480 (CHARLIE GRUNTS) I said, leave it! 816 00:47:40,515 --> 00:47:42,449 CHARLIE: Liz, would you stop? 817 00:47:44,387 --> 00:47:47,520 Actually, stay. We'll have a little chat. 818 00:47:51,559 --> 00:47:52,558 What's this? 819 00:47:54,034 --> 00:47:55,132 The fuck does it look like? 820 00:47:57,565 --> 00:47:59,565 It's a fat-guy wheelchair. 821 00:47:59,600 --> 00:48:01,567 And why do I need a wheelchair? 822 00:48:01,602 --> 00:48:04,702 I was talking to one of the ER doctors, 823 00:48:04,737 --> 00:48:08,046 He said moderate activity would be a good idea. 824 00:48:08,081 --> 00:48:09,641 Sense of independence might help you out. 825 00:48:09,676 --> 00:48:10,842 And what did you pay for this thing? 826 00:48:10,877 --> 00:48:13,282 Nothing. We ordered it for a patient a few months ago. 827 00:48:13,317 --> 00:48:14,415 It's just been sitting around. 828 00:48:14,450 --> 00:48:15,482 What happened to the patient? 829 00:48:17,024 --> 00:48:19,057 Just try it out. 830 00:48:19,092 --> 00:48:20,091 Please. 831 00:48:21,127 --> 00:48:22,291 (SIGHS) 832 00:48:23,030 --> 00:48:24,656 (GRUNTING) 833 00:48:27,595 --> 00:48:29,298 (EXHALES SHARPLY) 834 00:48:30,334 --> 00:48:33,731 Beep. Beep. Beep. 835 00:48:35,570 --> 00:48:38,472 (LAUGHING) 836 00:48:39,607 --> 00:48:41,211 CHARLIE: Can I sit? I gotcha. 837 00:48:42,412 --> 00:48:44,379 (CHARLIE GROANING) 838 00:48:47,054 --> 00:48:48,119 (CHUCKLES) 839 00:48:49,452 --> 00:48:51,452 Good? Yeah, actually, this is really nice. 840 00:48:54,094 --> 00:48:55,357 Yeah. 841 00:48:55,392 --> 00:48:57,095 Let me clear some space for you. 842 00:48:57,658 --> 00:48:58,657 CHARLIE: Whee. 843 00:49:00,265 --> 00:49:01,264 Hello? 844 00:49:06,403 --> 00:49:07,534 CHARLIE: Look, no hands. 845 00:49:09,505 --> 00:49:11,439 Thank you, Liz. This is great, so great. 846 00:49:11,474 --> 00:49:14,673 (CHUCKLES) See? I told you. CHARLIE: I know. 847 00:49:14,708 --> 00:49:16,444 I should go. Ah-pap-pap. 848 00:49:16,479 --> 00:49:17,676 Not until we have our little chat. 849 00:49:19,152 --> 00:49:20,679 What? LIZ: Come on. 850 00:49:27,391 --> 00:49:28,522 Liz. 851 00:49:28,557 --> 00:49:30,161 Just gimme a minute with him. 852 00:49:39,865 --> 00:49:41,436 (DOG BARKS IN DISTANCE) 853 00:49:57,685 --> 00:49:58,684 Where are you from? 854 00:50:00,193 --> 00:50:01,226 What? 855 00:50:01,261 --> 00:50:03,095 You said you've only been here for a little while. 856 00:50:06,298 --> 00:50:07,759 Where you from? 857 00:50:07,794 --> 00:50:11,136 Uh, Iowa. A town called Waterloo? 858 00:50:11,765 --> 00:50:12,797 You asking me? 859 00:50:13,701 --> 00:50:15,173 No. I'm from Waterloo. 860 00:50:15,604 --> 00:50:17,208 Okay. 861 00:50:17,243 --> 00:50:19,309 Your whole family move out here for New Life? 862 00:50:20,312 --> 00:50:21,773 No, it's just me. 863 00:50:21,808 --> 00:50:24,314 I wanted to do some missionary work before school. 864 00:50:24,349 --> 00:50:25,711 (CHUCKLES) 865 00:50:25,746 --> 00:50:28,153 You're from Iowa, 866 00:50:28,188 --> 00:50:31,453 and you came to Idaho to do missionary work? 867 00:50:31,488 --> 00:50:33,323 Why aren't you in Africa or something? 868 00:50:33,358 --> 00:50:35,160 Idaho needs the Word as much as anywhere else. 869 00:50:42,235 --> 00:50:43,828 Okay, listen. 870 00:50:43,863 --> 00:50:45,467 I know this is fun for you. 871 00:50:45,502 --> 00:50:46,666 You get to travel around, 872 00:50:46,701 --> 00:50:48,305 act superior than everyone else, 873 00:50:49,440 --> 00:50:50,736 and eventually, you go home, 874 00:50:50,771 --> 00:50:52,870 get some boring job, have too many kids. 875 00:50:52,905 --> 00:50:53,737 It's God's plan. 876 00:50:53,773 --> 00:50:57,149 But there are other types of people. 877 00:50:57,184 --> 00:50:58,414 People like Charlie, 878 00:50:58,449 --> 00:51:01,648 for whom this amazing plan doesn't fit. 879 00:51:02,717 --> 00:51:05,850 So, just stay away from him. 880 00:51:05,885 --> 00:51:07,324 He doesn't need this right now. 881 00:51:09,658 --> 00:51:11,394 I disagree. 882 00:51:11,429 --> 00:51:14,166 (EXHALES) Excuse me? Sorry, I just, uh... 883 00:51:14,201 --> 00:51:15,563 He's dying. 884 00:51:15,598 --> 00:51:17,202 He's refusing to go to the hospital. 885 00:51:17,237 --> 00:51:18,764 What he needs is spiritual guidance. 886 00:51:18,799 --> 00:51:20,271 And you're gonna give him that? 887 00:51:20,306 --> 00:51:22,306 No. God will. 888 00:51:24,937 --> 00:51:26,145 I see. 889 00:51:45,265 --> 00:51:47,364 My big brother did some missionary work for New Life. 890 00:51:49,434 --> 00:51:50,664 Went to South America. 891 00:51:51,469 --> 00:51:53,634 Oh. Yeah. 892 00:51:53,669 --> 00:51:54,635 I was the black sheep. 893 00:51:54,670 --> 00:51:57,275 I refused to go to church ever since I was 12. 894 00:51:58,311 --> 00:51:59,706 Dad knew I was a lost cause, 895 00:52:02,249 --> 00:52:06,251 but not my brother, he loved New Life. 896 00:52:06,286 --> 00:52:08,352 He wrote me a letter a few months after he left, 897 00:52:08,387 --> 00:52:10,486 told me he was tired, 898 00:52:10,521 --> 00:52:11,949 and lonely, but he didn't want to come home 899 00:52:11,984 --> 00:52:13,423 because he didn't want to get married. 900 00:52:14,459 --> 00:52:15,623 He didn't want to get married? 901 00:52:15,658 --> 00:52:17,427 Dad had set it all up. 902 00:52:17,462 --> 00:52:18,428 Pushed him into getting married 903 00:52:18,463 --> 00:52:21,827 to this girl from the church he barely knew. 904 00:52:21,862 --> 00:52:24,401 But when he came back, he met someone else. 905 00:52:24,436 --> 00:52:26,436 Fell in love, started a whole new life. 906 00:52:26,471 --> 00:52:29,505 And Dad kicked him out of the church. 907 00:52:30,409 --> 00:52:31,441 And the family. 908 00:52:33,313 --> 00:52:34,543 I thought he was gonna be able 909 00:52:34,578 --> 00:52:36,611 to get over all that religious stuff, 910 00:52:36,646 --> 00:52:39,911 but it was like a cancer. 911 00:52:39,946 --> 00:52:42,485 He couldn't shake it. 912 00:52:42,520 --> 00:52:44,322 He just caved in on himself, 913 00:52:44,357 --> 00:52:45,785 stopped sleeping, stopped eating. 914 00:52:45,820 --> 00:52:46,951 Lost a ton of weight. 915 00:52:48,658 --> 00:52:50,526 One night, he doesn't come home. 916 00:52:52,662 --> 00:52:54,563 Couple weeks later, this guy is out jogging 917 00:52:54,598 --> 00:52:56,400 on a bike path near the river in Lewiston, 918 00:52:56,435 --> 00:52:57,995 sees something washed up on shore, 919 00:52:58,030 --> 00:52:59,832 and that was Alan. 920 00:53:02,309 --> 00:53:04,474 The love of Charlie's life, and my brother. 921 00:53:05,972 --> 00:53:08,412 Oh. Yeah. "Oh." 922 00:53:08,447 --> 00:53:10,942 To this day, my dad won't admit it. 923 00:53:10,977 --> 00:53:13,483 Told the whole congregation Alan's death was... 924 00:53:15,421 --> 00:53:17,454 just an unfortunate accident. 925 00:53:20,085 --> 00:53:22,855 Denying him to the end. 926 00:53:31,866 --> 00:53:34,834 Look, I know that you don't trust me. 927 00:53:34,869 --> 00:53:37,507 And I know that I haven't known him for very long, 928 00:53:37,542 --> 00:53:40,477 but I really think that God brought me here, 929 00:53:40,512 --> 00:53:42,677 right when Charlie needs it the most. 930 00:53:42,712 --> 00:53:45,548 I just want him to be saved, that's all... You listen to me! 931 00:53:45,583 --> 00:53:46,912 He doesn't need saving! 932 00:53:48,080 --> 00:53:50,586 In a few days, he's probably going to be dead, 933 00:53:50,621 --> 00:53:53,050 so what he needs is for you to leave him alone. 934 00:53:53,085 --> 00:53:54,722 I'm the only one who can help him. 935 00:53:54,757 --> 00:53:56,053 You understand me? CHARLIE: Liz. 936 00:54:05,031 --> 00:54:06,569 (LIZ SIGHS) 937 00:54:10,102 --> 00:54:12,839 (CUTLERY CLACKING) 938 00:54:18,715 --> 00:54:20,550 (CHARLIE WHEEZES SOFTLY) 939 00:54:22,719 --> 00:54:24,081 (TV TURNS ON) 940 00:54:24,116 --> 00:54:26,985 You wanna watch some Maury? 941 00:54:28,560 --> 00:54:29,988 Sounds good, right? 942 00:54:30,023 --> 00:54:33,530 (INDISTINCT CHATTER ON TV) 943 00:54:33,565 --> 00:54:35,092 Actually, I got another night shift tonight. 944 00:54:35,127 --> 00:54:36,731 I better, uh... 945 00:54:36,766 --> 00:54:37,665 You good for the night? 946 00:54:39,769 --> 00:54:42,066 (SMACKS LIPS) I'll leave the remote here. 947 00:54:47,513 --> 00:54:49,040 (DOOR OPENS) 948 00:54:52,815 --> 00:54:53,847 (DOOR CLOSES) 949 00:54:55,917 --> 00:54:57,389 (LOCK CLICKS) 950 00:55:18,742 --> 00:55:20,104 (GRUNTS SOFTLY) 951 00:55:22,680 --> 00:55:25,142 (LIGHT SWITCH CLICKING) 952 00:55:28,213 --> 00:55:29,487 (SIGHS) 953 00:55:36,089 --> 00:55:37,561 (SIGHS) 954 00:55:43,503 --> 00:55:45,899 (SNIFFING) 955 00:55:47,771 --> 00:55:49,969 (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) 956 00:56:00,784 --> 00:56:01,783 (DOOR SHUTS) 957 00:56:12,125 --> 00:56:13,498 (KNOCK AT DOOR) 958 00:56:13,533 --> 00:56:14,928 MAN: Gambino's! 959 00:56:14,963 --> 00:56:16,963 Yeah. You can, uh... 960 00:56:16,998 --> 00:56:19,196 MAN: Money in the mailbox, leave it on the bench. 961 00:56:20,507 --> 00:56:21,803 Yeah. Thanks. 962 00:56:23,873 --> 00:56:24,872 MAN: I'm Dan. 963 00:56:27,613 --> 00:56:28,810 What? 964 00:56:28,845 --> 00:56:31,780 DAN: I just... My name, it's Dan. 965 00:56:33,685 --> 00:56:36,147 I've been coming here for a while now. 966 00:56:36,182 --> 00:56:38,182 Just thought you'd wanna know my name. 967 00:56:40,824 --> 00:56:41,856 Charlie. 968 00:56:43,156 --> 00:56:44,661 DAN: Hey, Charlie. 969 00:56:44,696 --> 00:56:46,993 (MAILBOX OPENS, CLOSES) 970 00:56:47,028 --> 00:56:48,225 DAN: Have a good night, okay? 971 00:56:49,030 --> 00:56:52,900 (FOOTSTEPS RECEDING) 972 00:56:56,840 --> 00:56:58,073 ...it sure did. 973 00:56:58,108 --> 00:57:00,644 More Idaho Republicans want to see Senator Ted Cruz 974 00:57:00,679 --> 00:57:02,580 in the White House than any other candidate. 975 00:57:02,615 --> 00:57:05,550 Cruz will split Idaho's 32 delegates 976 00:57:05,585 --> 00:57:06,885 with Donald Trump, 977 00:57:06,920 --> 00:57:10,148 the only other candidate to clear that 20% threshold. 978 00:57:10,183 --> 00:57:13,217 It was a disappointing night for Senator Marco Rubio 979 00:57:13,252 --> 00:57:15,120 who failed to win any delegates 980 00:57:15,155 --> 00:57:17,859 in the four states that held primaries, while... (SWITCHES TV OFF) 981 00:57:25,033 --> 00:57:26,901 (WHEELCHAIR SQUEAKING) 982 00:57:45,020 --> 00:57:46,855 "This apartment smells. 983 00:57:46,890 --> 00:57:50,925 "This notebook is retarded. I hate everyone." 984 00:57:52,698 --> 00:57:53,697 (SIGHS) 985 00:58:00,167 --> 00:58:03,003 (SYLLABICALLY) This apartment smells. 986 00:58:03,038 --> 00:58:07,139 This notebook is retarded. 987 00:58:07,174 --> 00:58:10,109 I hate everyone. (LAUGHING) 988 00:58:12,784 --> 00:58:14,179 (COUGHING, WHEEZING) 989 00:58:14,214 --> 00:58:16,786 (GRUNTING IN PAIN) 990 00:58:16,821 --> 00:58:18,315 (COUGHS) 991 00:58:18,350 --> 00:58:22,022 (BREATHING LABORIOUSLY) 992 00:58:23,696 --> 00:58:25,289 And I felt saddest of all 993 00:58:26,325 --> 00:58:28,193 when I read the boring chapters 994 00:58:29,394 --> 00:58:31,603 that were only descriptions of whales 995 00:58:32,397 --> 00:58:34,067 because (EXHALES) I knew 996 00:58:35,873 --> 00:58:38,676 that the author was just trying to save us 997 00:58:38,711 --> 00:58:40,205 from his own sad story, 998 00:58:41,406 --> 00:58:42,845 just for a little while. 999 00:58:44,684 --> 00:58:46,112 (BREATHES DEEPLY) 1000 00:58:46,147 --> 00:58:47,619 This apartment smells. 1001 00:58:49,953 --> 00:58:52,184 (INHALES DEEPLY) This apartment smells. 1002 00:58:55,222 --> 00:58:56,958 The author was just trying to save us 1003 00:58:56,993 --> 00:58:58,223 from his own sad story. 1004 00:58:59,897 --> 00:59:01,061 I hate everyone. 1005 00:59:05,397 --> 00:59:06,605 I hate everyone. 1006 00:59:12,338 --> 00:59:13,337 Do you have it? 1007 00:59:14,274 --> 00:59:15,306 CHARLIE: I'm almost done. 1008 00:59:17,783 --> 00:59:20,751 You can wait while I finish it up, 1009 00:59:23,217 --> 00:59:24,249 print it out. 1010 00:59:27,089 --> 00:59:29,089 Maybe while you're waiting, 1011 00:59:29,124 --> 00:59:31,993 you can write some more in your notebook. Oh, my God. 1012 00:59:32,028 --> 00:59:34,193 You've only written a couple sentences so far. 1013 00:59:34,228 --> 00:59:35,060 Can you write more? 1014 00:59:35,096 --> 00:59:37,097 I kind of hate you. (CHUCKLING) Yeah. 1015 00:59:37,132 --> 00:59:39,737 Well, you hate everyone. 1016 00:59:40,773 --> 00:59:42,366 Listen, just keep going. 1017 00:59:43,303 --> 00:59:44,302 Forget about the poem. 1018 00:59:44,338 --> 00:59:47,239 Write whatever you want, whatever you're thinking. 1019 00:59:47,274 --> 00:59:48,878 (BAG THUDS) Okay. Be quiet, just... 1020 00:59:59,451 --> 01:00:01,055 (EXHALES DEEPLY) 1021 01:00:05,765 --> 01:00:08,898 You know, I was in a really strange place in my life 1022 01:00:08,933 --> 01:00:10,867 when I married your mom. Did I fucking ask? 1023 01:00:12,068 --> 01:00:13,771 I just wish... 1024 01:00:13,806 --> 01:00:15,003 I'm sor... I'm sorry. 1025 01:00:25,411 --> 01:00:27,180 I understand that you're angry. 1026 01:00:28,348 --> 01:00:29,479 (BREATHES HEAVILY) 1027 01:00:29,514 --> 01:00:30,755 But... 1028 01:00:33,353 --> 01:00:37,861 you don't have to be angry at the whole world. 1029 01:00:41,262 --> 01:00:43,834 You can just be angry at me. 1030 01:00:43,869 --> 01:00:45,099 (AGGRESSIVELY) Okay, you know what? 1031 01:00:45,134 --> 01:00:47,365 You can't throw me away like a piece of garbage, 1032 01:00:47,400 --> 01:00:50,808 and then suddenly just want to be my dad eight years later. 1033 01:00:50,843 --> 01:00:53,745 You left me for your boyfriend. 1034 01:00:53,780 --> 01:00:55,747 (SIGHS) It's that simple. 1035 01:00:55,782 --> 01:00:57,342 And if you've been telling yourself anything different, 1036 01:00:57,377 --> 01:00:58,816 then you're lying to yourself. 1037 01:01:03,086 --> 01:01:04,285 But you know what? I'm glad. 1038 01:01:04,321 --> 01:01:07,352 I'm glad, because you taught me something very important. 1039 01:01:08,091 --> 01:01:10,861 People are assholes. 1040 01:01:11,930 --> 01:01:13,424 Most people learn that way too late. 1041 01:01:14,559 --> 01:01:16,900 You... You taught me that when I was eight. 1042 01:01:19,366 --> 01:01:20,739 Thank you for that. 1043 01:01:31,180 --> 01:01:32,278 You know, you could've... 1044 01:01:33,512 --> 01:01:35,380 What? 1045 01:01:35,415 --> 01:01:36,821 ELLIE: You could've been sending us money. 1046 01:01:38,990 --> 01:01:40,924 If you had all that money saved up, 1047 01:01:40,959 --> 01:01:42,189 and wanted to be a part of my life so bad, 1048 01:01:42,224 --> 01:01:43,960 you could've been sending money to Mom. 1049 01:01:43,995 --> 01:01:44,961 I did. 1050 01:01:44,996 --> 01:01:46,996 ELLIE: Yeah, I mean more than just child support. 1051 01:01:57,976 --> 01:01:59,008 I did. 1052 01:02:00,946 --> 01:02:04,409 When I left your mom, she did not want me around you. 1053 01:02:05,313 --> 01:02:06,917 I hoped 1054 01:02:06,952 --> 01:02:09,887 that she would change her mind eventually, but she... 1055 01:02:09,922 --> 01:02:11,515 You could have just fucking called me. 1056 01:02:13,057 --> 01:02:14,155 All this time, you... 1057 01:02:15,455 --> 01:02:17,191 You could have been a part of my life. 1058 01:02:19,063 --> 01:02:20,161 Ellie. 1059 01:02:22,033 --> 01:02:23,098 Look at me. 1060 01:02:29,271 --> 01:02:31,843 Who would want me to be a part of their life? 1061 01:02:43,989 --> 01:02:45,087 I'm hungry. 1062 01:02:47,157 --> 01:02:49,256 There's some stuff for sandwiches in the fridge. 1063 01:02:54,395 --> 01:02:56,230 I'll make you one, but it's going to be small. 1064 01:03:00,566 --> 01:03:02,269 And I'm only using turkey, 1065 01:03:03,107 --> 01:03:04,271 and no mayonnaise. 1066 01:03:09,641 --> 01:03:11,344 What? Nothing. 1067 01:03:12,611 --> 01:03:14,512 You're an amazing person, Ellie. 1068 01:03:14,547 --> 01:03:18,285 I hope you know what an amazing person you are. 1069 01:03:18,320 --> 01:03:21,486 I couldn't ask for a more incredible daughter. 1070 01:03:24,524 --> 01:03:26,194 I'll print that out for you now. 1071 01:03:33,170 --> 01:03:34,202 (BIRD WINGS FLAP) 1072 01:03:41,343 --> 01:03:42,914 (KEYBOARD CLACKING) 1073 01:03:46,678 --> 01:03:47,952 (GRATING) 1074 01:03:50,286 --> 01:03:51,285 (LIGHTER CLICKS) 1075 01:03:52,090 --> 01:03:54,090 (CHARLIE BREATHES HEAVILY) 1076 01:04:13,111 --> 01:04:14,242 (LIGHTER CLICKS) 1077 01:04:29,193 --> 01:04:30,555 (SNORES SOFTLY) 1078 01:04:30,590 --> 01:04:31,589 (PILLS RATTLE) 1079 01:04:48,278 --> 01:04:49,673 (DOOR CREAKS) 1080 01:05:15,404 --> 01:05:16,502 (KNOCK AT DOOR) 1081 01:05:20,739 --> 01:05:22,475 (KNOCK AT DOOR) ELLIE: Yeah? 1082 01:05:22,510 --> 01:05:24,213 THOMAS: Uh... Hello? 1083 01:05:27,185 --> 01:05:28,514 (KNOCKS) Hi. 1084 01:05:30,287 --> 01:05:31,286 ELLIE: Come on. 1085 01:05:32,553 --> 01:05:33,684 Is he... 1086 01:05:33,719 --> 01:05:34,818 Is he okay? I don't know. 1087 01:05:34,854 --> 01:05:37,292 I ground up some Ambien and I put it in his sandwich. 1088 01:05:37,327 --> 01:05:38,392 What? 1089 01:05:38,427 --> 01:05:40,097 I only gave him a couple. He's fine. 1090 01:05:40,132 --> 01:05:41,263 I can take, like, three at a time. 1091 01:05:41,298 --> 01:05:42,462 THOMAS: Where did you get Ambien? 1092 01:05:42,497 --> 01:05:43,628 I had sex with a pharmacist. 1093 01:05:45,632 --> 01:05:47,434 I'm kidding. Gross. 1094 01:05:47,469 --> 01:05:49,172 My mom pops them like Tic Tacs. 1095 01:05:49,207 --> 01:05:51,075 I don't know if he should be taking Ambien. 1096 01:05:53,541 --> 01:05:56,080 Does this make you nervous? 'Cause it's just pot. 1097 01:05:56,115 --> 01:05:57,807 It's not like I'm smoking meth or anything. 1098 01:05:57,842 --> 01:05:59,710 I know. I... I know what pot is, okay? 1099 01:05:59,745 --> 01:06:01,679 No. You only think you know what pot is 1100 01:06:01,714 --> 01:06:03,813 because your parents told you a bunch of lies about it. 1101 01:06:03,848 --> 01:06:05,485 Don't. I know what drugs are. 1102 01:06:05,520 --> 01:06:08,389 I've smoked pot before. Ooh. Oh, I'm so impressed. 1103 01:06:08,424 --> 01:06:10,193 I wasn't trying to impress you. 1104 01:06:10,228 --> 01:06:12,492 You've not smoked pot before. Yes, I have. It... 1105 01:06:14,496 --> 01:06:15,627 It was kind of a problem. 1106 01:06:16,795 --> 01:06:18,201 That is the stupidest fucking thing 1107 01:06:18,236 --> 01:06:19,068 I've ever heard in my entire life. 1108 01:06:19,104 --> 01:06:21,732 I was smoking every day. I had a problem. 1109 01:06:21,767 --> 01:06:24,834 You were a stoner. You had a hobby. 1110 01:06:24,869 --> 01:06:26,803 All right, I'm gonna go. Just tell him I was here and I'll... 1111 01:06:26,838 --> 01:06:29,245 If you leave, I'll feed him the rest of the pills I have in the bottle. 1112 01:06:29,280 --> 01:06:30,840 What? Yeah. 1113 01:06:30,875 --> 01:06:33,612 There's, like, 20, 30 more in here. 1114 01:06:34,549 --> 01:06:35,812 I'll crush them up, 1115 01:06:35,847 --> 01:06:37,847 I'll put them in some water, (PUTS BOTTLE DOWN) 1116 01:06:37,882 --> 01:06:39,255 and I'll pour it down his throat. 1117 01:06:40,192 --> 01:06:41,323 You wouldn't actually do that, 1118 01:06:41,358 --> 01:06:42,489 would you? Sit down. 1119 01:06:49,564 --> 01:06:50,728 So, why do you keep coming back here? 1120 01:06:52,897 --> 01:06:54,138 He needs help. 1121 01:06:55,273 --> 01:06:56,305 He needs God in his life right now. 1122 01:06:56,340 --> 01:06:57,405 That's a stupid reason. 1123 01:06:58,639 --> 01:07:00,804 Do you think he wants to have sex with you? 1124 01:07:00,839 --> 01:07:03,213 That is so gross, oh, my God. Take a hit. 1125 01:07:03,248 --> 01:07:04,610 I don't want... If you don't take a hit, 1126 01:07:04,645 --> 01:07:05,945 I'm gonna call the police 1127 01:07:05,980 --> 01:07:08,185 and I'm gonna tell them that you tried to rape me. Take a hit. 1128 01:07:10,585 --> 01:07:11,815 I don't understand you at all. 1129 01:07:12,455 --> 01:07:13,454 Oh, my God. 1130 01:07:14,787 --> 01:07:16,292 Is there a carb on this? 1131 01:07:16,327 --> 01:07:17,722 Ooh, I'm impressed. 1132 01:07:17,757 --> 01:07:19,460 I wasn't trying to impress you. 1133 01:07:19,495 --> 01:07:20,527 There isn't a carb. 1134 01:07:24,698 --> 01:07:25,862 (SIGHS) 1135 01:07:30,374 --> 01:07:31,538 (CAMERA CLICKS) (COUGHS) 1136 01:07:32,541 --> 01:07:33,640 Calm down. 1137 01:07:33,676 --> 01:07:35,344 (COUGHING) What are you gonna do with that picture? 1138 01:07:35,379 --> 01:07:36,708 I'm gonna masturbate to it. 1139 01:07:36,743 --> 01:07:37,841 Is that what you want me to say? 1140 01:07:37,876 --> 01:07:39,249 You're a pervert. Take another hit. 1141 01:07:41,253 --> 01:07:43,352 Look, I'm just fucking with you, all right? 1142 01:07:43,387 --> 01:07:44,815 I'm not gonna kill anyone, 1143 01:07:44,850 --> 01:07:47,851 I'm not gonna tell anyone that you tried to rape me. 1144 01:07:47,886 --> 01:07:49,457 You're not going to give him any more Ambien? 1145 01:07:49,492 --> 01:07:50,755 ELLIE: No. (PILLS RATTLE) 1146 01:07:50,790 --> 01:07:52,493 (ZIPS BAG) 1147 01:07:52,528 --> 01:07:54,198 Why do you keep coming back here? 1148 01:07:56,598 --> 01:07:58,334 I don't know. 1149 01:07:58,369 --> 01:07:59,863 Seriously, if you hate him so much, then why... 1150 01:07:59,898 --> 01:08:01,436 I'm done answering questions now. 1151 01:08:07,708 --> 01:08:08,806 Can I take another hit? 1152 01:08:10,612 --> 01:08:11,842 It goes against your religion, 1153 01:08:13,318 --> 01:08:14,482 and that makes you a hypocrite. 1154 01:08:16,486 --> 01:08:17,485 Go ahead. 1155 01:08:22,921 --> 01:08:24,195 (INHALES) 1156 01:08:26,463 --> 01:08:28,496 (CAMERA CLICKS) 1157 01:08:28,531 --> 01:08:29,728 I really wish that you wouldn't do that. 1158 01:08:29,763 --> 01:08:31,367 Yeah, I know. I heard you the first time. 1159 01:08:32,568 --> 01:08:33,567 Do you find me attractive? 1160 01:08:34,405 --> 01:08:35,602 (HESITATES) 1161 01:08:35,637 --> 01:08:37,538 Because I'm not attracted to you at all, 1162 01:08:38,310 --> 01:08:40,244 just to let you know. 1163 01:08:40,279 --> 01:08:41,443 I'm not trying to be mean or anything. 1164 01:08:41,478 --> 01:08:42,774 I just don't think you're very good-looking, 1165 01:08:43,744 --> 01:08:44,776 or interesting. 1166 01:08:45,515 --> 01:08:46,514 Or intelligent. 1167 01:08:46,813 --> 01:08:47,878 (SCOFFS) 1168 01:08:48,947 --> 01:08:50,386 Oh, my God, grow up. 1169 01:08:50,421 --> 01:08:51,717 Maybe someone else finds you attractive. 1170 01:08:51,752 --> 01:08:52,718 Maybe my dad finds you attractive. 1171 01:08:52,753 --> 01:08:54,819 I really wish you... You know, it is so easy 1172 01:08:54,854 --> 01:08:55,886 to make you uncomfortable. 1173 01:08:55,921 --> 01:08:57,558 It's honestly... It's a little sad. 1174 01:08:58,462 --> 01:08:59,461 You can cash that out. 1175 01:09:13,543 --> 01:09:16,445 (SCOFFS) If my parents knew I was getting high, 1176 01:09:16,480 --> 01:09:17,875 getting high while out witnessing for the church... 1177 01:09:17,910 --> 01:09:18,909 You're not from New Life. 1178 01:09:20,715 --> 01:09:21,781 What? 1179 01:09:21,816 --> 01:09:24,618 There's a kid in the grade below me who goes there. 1180 01:09:24,653 --> 01:09:25,751 He told me that they stopped doing 1181 01:09:25,786 --> 01:09:27,621 door-to-door stuff last year 1182 01:09:27,656 --> 01:09:29,854 when some woman was out preaching or whatever, 1183 01:09:29,889 --> 01:09:31,988 and a guy answered the door with no clothes on. 1184 01:09:33,431 --> 01:09:35,431 I gotta go. Who are you, really? 1185 01:09:36,962 --> 01:09:38,434 Come on, just tell me! 1186 01:09:39,668 --> 01:09:41,470 THOMAS: Why do you care? Because I think we have 1187 01:09:41,505 --> 01:09:42,702 a blossoming friendship. 1188 01:09:44,409 --> 01:09:45,573 You're just messing with me. 1189 01:09:46,972 --> 01:09:48,279 ELLIE: No, I'm not. 1190 01:09:49,480 --> 01:09:50,611 You're not going to tell anyone? 1191 01:09:52,351 --> 01:09:53,350 Who am I gonna tell? 1192 01:10:01,624 --> 01:10:02,689 I was on a mission. 1193 01:10:06,398 --> 01:10:08,398 With a group from my church, back in Waterloo, 1194 01:10:09,632 --> 01:10:10,895 my hometown in Iowa. 1195 01:10:12,371 --> 01:10:13,898 When my dad caught me smoking pot, 1196 01:10:13,933 --> 01:10:16,604 he thought a mission would be a good idea. 1197 01:10:16,639 --> 01:10:19,739 I mean, the truth is, he's just embarrassed by me 1198 01:10:19,774 --> 01:10:21,972 and wanted me gone for a while. 1199 01:10:22,843 --> 01:10:24,975 Anyway, I just left. 1200 01:10:28,420 --> 01:10:29,518 I couldn't do it anymore. 1201 01:10:31,555 --> 01:10:32,554 Why? 1202 01:10:33,689 --> 01:10:34,721 The mission leader, 1203 01:10:36,527 --> 01:10:37,493 this guy, Jerry, 1204 01:10:37,528 --> 01:10:39,088 all he had us doing was standing on corners 1205 01:10:39,123 --> 01:10:41,057 and handing out pamphlets. 1206 01:10:41,092 --> 01:10:42,531 The end of each day, he'd be like, 1207 01:10:42,566 --> 01:10:44,060 "Look how many people we're helping," but... 1208 01:10:44,931 --> 01:10:45,996 I tried to talk to him 1209 01:10:46,031 --> 01:10:47,397 about different ways we can minister. 1210 01:10:47,433 --> 01:10:50,737 I mean, different ways that we could actually help people. But... 1211 01:10:52,037 --> 01:10:54,510 You could just tell that he didn't need to earn 1212 01:10:54,545 --> 01:10:55,907 or prove his faith at all. 1213 01:10:59,044 --> 01:11:02,518 After a while, I was just, like, "Am I really helping?" 1214 01:11:03,752 --> 01:11:05,587 No. You were not. 1215 01:11:07,151 --> 01:11:08,821 Yeah, I started to feel that way, too. 1216 01:11:10,858 --> 01:11:11,757 I don't feel that way, 1217 01:11:11,793 --> 01:11:14,057 I know that you weren't helping people. 1218 01:11:14,092 --> 01:11:15,465 It doesn't help people to tell them 1219 01:11:15,500 --> 01:11:16,697 that they should believe in God. 1220 01:11:16,732 --> 01:11:17,797 Why would that help people? 1221 01:11:18,800 --> 01:11:20,569 THOMAS: I just thought... 1222 01:11:20,604 --> 01:11:22,538 I see all my family, my friends, 1223 01:11:24,069 --> 01:11:25,475 they're all just so happy. 1224 01:11:30,515 --> 01:11:31,712 I just want to be like that. 1225 01:11:33,947 --> 01:11:35,012 So, why'd you leave, then? 1226 01:11:36,719 --> 01:11:39,082 I was worried I was gonna get arrested. 1227 01:11:40,019 --> 01:11:41,018 For smoking pot? 1228 01:11:42,725 --> 01:11:43,922 For stealing from the mission. 1229 01:11:51,965 --> 01:11:54,900 One day, I ditched the pamphlets. 1230 01:11:54,935 --> 01:11:55,834 I went door-to-door. 1231 01:11:55,870 --> 01:11:57,837 I started actually engaging with people. 1232 01:11:57,872 --> 01:12:00,741 Finally. I mean, it felt like I was doing something, 1233 01:12:00,776 --> 01:12:01,841 helping someone. 1234 01:12:03,614 --> 01:12:05,548 (SCOFFS) 1235 01:12:05,583 --> 01:12:08,518 And that night, I went back to the mission meeting, 1236 01:12:08,553 --> 01:12:09,981 and I told everyone what I did that day, 1237 01:12:10,016 --> 01:12:11,917 and Jerry was like, "That's not what we do, buddy." 1238 01:12:11,952 --> 01:12:13,252 And I was like, "Well, why not?" 1239 01:12:13,287 --> 01:12:15,525 And we got in this huge argument in front of everyone, and... 1240 01:12:16,792 --> 01:12:17,824 (SIGHS) 1241 01:12:20,466 --> 01:12:23,632 And that night, I decided to leave. 1242 01:12:23,667 --> 01:12:25,700 And when everyone was asleep, I... 1243 01:12:25,735 --> 01:12:26,833 I took the petty cash. 1244 01:12:28,804 --> 01:12:29,869 ELLIE: How much? 1245 01:12:33,512 --> 01:12:35,545 $2,436. 1246 01:12:37,747 --> 01:12:39,076 Oh. 1247 01:12:39,111 --> 01:12:40,484 THOMAS: Yeah. "Oh." 1248 01:12:42,521 --> 01:12:43,320 I got on a bus. 1249 01:12:44,820 --> 01:12:46,688 Jerry and my parents were calling me 1250 01:12:46,723 --> 01:12:47,953 over and over again. 1251 01:12:49,726 --> 01:12:51,088 I just tossed my phone. 1252 01:12:53,763 --> 01:12:56,533 After a while, I wound up here. 1253 01:13:00,671 --> 01:13:02,605 THOMAS: I thought I could use this money 1254 01:13:02,640 --> 01:13:03,771 for my own mission. 1255 01:13:05,577 --> 01:13:08,138 You know, see my faith save just one person. 1256 01:13:09,878 --> 01:13:11,911 But now I'm almost out of money. I just... 1257 01:13:13,277 --> 01:13:15,552 I can't go home, and... 1258 01:13:15,587 --> 01:13:17,114 My parents probably wanna disown me. 1259 01:13:22,957 --> 01:13:24,121 (SIGHS) I don't know what to do. 1260 01:13:35,068 --> 01:13:36,672 You're more interesting to me now. 1261 01:13:39,710 --> 01:13:40,742 Thanks. 1262 01:13:53,559 --> 01:13:54,954 So, that's why you wanna save my dad. 1263 01:13:59,829 --> 01:14:00,828 (DOOR OPENS) 1264 01:14:05,967 --> 01:14:06,966 (CAMERA CLICKS) 1265 01:14:09,608 --> 01:14:10,607 (MAIN DOOR LOCK CLICKS) 1266 01:14:15,944 --> 01:14:17,108 Mom? 1267 01:14:17,143 --> 01:14:18,681 Don't freak out. Shut up. 1268 01:14:21,147 --> 01:14:22,179 LIZ: You again? 1269 01:14:23,050 --> 01:14:24,214 Charlie? 1270 01:14:24,755 --> 01:14:25,754 Charlie? 1271 01:14:27,890 --> 01:14:28,955 Charlie? 1272 01:14:30,255 --> 01:14:31,694 (SOFTLY) Charlie. 1273 01:14:38,769 --> 01:14:39,999 (CHARLIE COUGHS) 1274 01:14:44,236 --> 01:14:45,268 (LIGHTER CLICKS) 1275 01:14:46,370 --> 01:14:47,644 Not with the oxygen tank. 1276 01:14:49,879 --> 01:14:50,878 I'll stand by the window. 1277 01:14:52,651 --> 01:14:53,650 (LIZ SIGHS) 1278 01:14:57,887 --> 01:15:00,987 Ellie told you she was coming over? 1279 01:15:01,022 --> 01:15:02,725 LIZ: No. I did. 1280 01:15:02,760 --> 01:15:04,056 And just in time, looks like. 1281 01:15:05,224 --> 01:15:06,993 You having any more pain? 1282 01:15:07,028 --> 01:15:08,698 (GRUNTS SOFTLY) 1283 01:15:08,733 --> 01:15:10,194 (SIGHS) How easy is it to move? 1284 01:15:11,065 --> 01:15:12,262 Not very. 1285 01:15:12,297 --> 01:15:14,836 Any confusion? Have you felt disoriented, 1286 01:15:14,871 --> 01:15:16,266 forgotten where you are or what you're doing? 1287 01:15:16,301 --> 01:15:19,907 Am I okay? No, you're not okay. 1288 01:15:19,942 --> 01:15:21,370 But as far as the sleeping pills, you're fine. 1289 01:15:21,405 --> 01:15:22,778 I don't think she gave you much. 1290 01:15:22,813 --> 01:15:23,944 Yeah, that's what I told you. 1291 01:15:26,146 --> 01:15:27,684 You know, I was a very angry, 1292 01:15:27,719 --> 01:15:28,885 very stupid little girl once, too, 1293 01:15:28,920 --> 01:15:30,621 but if you would've given him any more pills than that... 1294 01:15:30,656 --> 01:15:32,051 Yeah, but I didn't give him more pills than that, 1295 01:15:32,086 --> 01:15:33,756 I gave him two pills. Ellie? 1296 01:15:34,957 --> 01:15:36,187 How much money did he offer you? 1297 01:15:42,195 --> 01:15:44,195 All of it? How do you know about the money? 1298 01:15:45,000 --> 01:15:47,165 You think I'm an idiot? 1299 01:15:47,200 --> 01:15:49,068 You think I would believe that you were coming over here 1300 01:15:49,103 --> 01:15:50,333 out of the kindness of your heart? 1301 01:15:51,435 --> 01:15:54,810 (LAUGHS) Charlie doesn't have any money. 1302 01:15:54,845 --> 01:15:56,812 (LIZ CONTINUES LAUGHING) 1303 01:15:56,847 --> 01:15:58,682 She doesn't know? CHARLIE: Mary. 1304 01:15:58,717 --> 01:15:59,749 Where do you think all the money 1305 01:15:59,784 --> 01:16:00,783 from his teaching has been going? 1306 01:16:01,984 --> 01:16:03,148 The account for Ellie? 1307 01:16:03,183 --> 01:16:05,216 By now, it has to be huge. 1308 01:16:05,251 --> 01:16:06,888 Over $100,000 at least, right? 1309 01:16:08,793 --> 01:16:09,990 (WHEEZES SOFTLY) 1310 01:16:12,456 --> 01:16:13,862 That's not true, is it? 1311 01:16:17,802 --> 01:16:18,933 Charlie. 1312 01:16:20,299 --> 01:16:22,299 We could have gotten you anything you needed. 1313 01:16:23,775 --> 01:16:25,203 Special beds, physical therapists, 1314 01:16:25,238 --> 01:16:27,271 fucking health insurance! 1315 01:16:29,814 --> 01:16:31,209 Last winter, when my pick-up broke down 1316 01:16:31,244 --> 01:16:32,441 and I had to walk through the snow 1317 01:16:32,476 --> 01:16:33,816 to get your groceries for you... 1318 01:16:33,851 --> 01:16:35,246 I offered to get your truck fixed. 1319 01:16:35,281 --> 01:16:38,117 Yeah, and I refused because I thought you had $700 1320 01:16:38,152 --> 01:16:40,350 in your bank account. The money is for Ellie. 1321 01:16:41,760 --> 01:16:43,760 It's always been for Ellie. 1322 01:16:43,795 --> 01:16:46,158 If there was ever any kind of emergency, 1323 01:16:46,193 --> 01:16:48,061 I would have given you the money. Would you? 1324 01:16:52,034 --> 01:16:53,066 Wait. 1325 01:16:53,101 --> 01:16:55,805 (PANTING) 1326 01:16:56,973 --> 01:16:58,302 Wait. (DOOR SHUTS) 1327 01:17:01,406 --> 01:17:02,911 Mom, you're not getting any of my money. 1328 01:17:02,946 --> 01:17:03,945 MARY: Oh, shut up, Ellie. 1329 01:17:05,784 --> 01:17:07,377 Leave, right now. 1330 01:17:10,789 --> 01:17:12,122 Wait. 1331 01:17:12,157 --> 01:17:15,220 Ellie, I know you didn't mean to hurt me. I know you didn't... 1332 01:17:15,255 --> 01:17:16,859 Okay, you know what? Listen to me. Listen. 1333 01:17:16,894 --> 01:17:18,729 I don't care about you! 1334 01:17:18,764 --> 01:17:20,291 Get that through your fucking skull. 1335 01:17:20,326 --> 01:17:22,733 (CRYING) Ellie, please. Just fucking die already! 1336 01:17:23,263 --> 01:17:24,702 Enough! 1337 01:17:28,136 --> 01:17:29,399 Ellie, your... Your essay. 1338 01:17:33,174 --> 01:17:34,173 (OPENS DRAWER) 1339 01:17:37,816 --> 01:17:40,278 So... It's... 1340 01:17:43,250 --> 01:17:44,755 It's a really good essay! 1341 01:17:48,123 --> 01:17:49,991 (SOBS, WHEEZES) 1342 01:17:51,093 --> 01:17:52,422 (COUGHS) 1343 01:18:12,378 --> 01:18:14,411 (WHEEZES) Jesus, Charlie. 1344 01:18:22,355 --> 01:18:23,420 Do you have anything? 1345 01:18:27,833 --> 01:18:29,261 It's above the sink, 1346 01:18:29,296 --> 01:18:31,230 the kitchen counter on the left. 1347 01:18:33,300 --> 01:18:35,234 The other one. (SNIFFLES) Yup. 1348 01:18:37,304 --> 01:18:39,469 (COUGHING, WHEEZING) 1349 01:18:39,504 --> 01:18:41,372 MARY: Our deal was 1350 01:18:41,407 --> 01:18:43,341 to wait until she's out of the house to give her the money. 1351 01:18:44,278 --> 01:18:45,915 What's the difference? 1352 01:18:45,950 --> 01:18:49,919 The difference is she's 17 and still in high school. 1353 01:18:49,954 --> 01:18:52,856 She's gonna spend it on face tattoos or ponies, or something. 1354 01:18:52,891 --> 01:18:55,155 I think that she's a lot smarter than that. 1355 01:18:55,190 --> 01:18:56,387 (MARY SCOFFS) 1356 01:18:58,391 --> 01:18:59,390 So... 1357 01:19:02,494 --> 01:19:03,293 How's it been? 1358 01:19:04,936 --> 01:19:06,804 Getting to know her. (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) 1359 01:19:07,906 --> 01:19:10,236 She's amazing. (MARY CHUCKLES) 1360 01:19:10,271 --> 01:19:12,271 (SIGHS) You still do that. 1361 01:19:14,110 --> 01:19:15,109 What? 1362 01:19:16,046 --> 01:19:17,474 That positivity. 1363 01:19:19,214 --> 01:19:20,213 It's so annoying. 1364 01:19:21,249 --> 01:19:22,446 You're a complete cynic. 1365 01:19:24,054 --> 01:19:25,922 Just trying to balance us out. 1366 01:19:25,957 --> 01:19:27,957 Yeah. I guess I do miss that. 1367 01:19:29,158 --> 01:19:30,190 That one thing. 1368 01:19:31,622 --> 01:19:32,830 Just that? 1369 01:19:34,658 --> 01:19:36,933 That, and the cooking. 1370 01:19:36,968 --> 01:19:39,936 Last month, tried to make a stir-fry thing. CHARLIE: Yeah? 1371 01:19:39,971 --> 01:19:41,630 Almost set the entire apartment building on fire. 1372 01:19:41,665 --> 01:19:43,203 (LAUGHS) 1373 01:19:43,238 --> 01:19:45,106 (COUGHING) 1374 01:19:46,175 --> 01:19:48,175 (GASPS, COUGHS) 1375 01:19:48,540 --> 01:19:50,012 (GASPING) 1376 01:19:50,047 --> 01:19:53,983 (CONTINUES COUGHING) 1377 01:19:54,953 --> 01:19:56,150 (BREATHES DEEPLY) 1378 01:20:02,994 --> 01:20:04,620 I never knew you were doing this to yourself. 1379 01:20:06,228 --> 01:20:08,327 Well, you never asked how I was doing. 1380 01:20:09,660 --> 01:20:11,429 You never asked how I was doing either. 1381 01:20:12,663 --> 01:20:14,630 Every month, it's just, 1382 01:20:14,665 --> 01:20:17,501 "How much money do you need?" or, "How's Ellie?" 1383 01:20:17,536 --> 01:20:20,570 You didn't tell me that she's flunking out of school. 1384 01:20:20,605 --> 01:20:22,209 I guess I just didn't need the lecture 1385 01:20:22,244 --> 01:20:23,947 about my involvement in her education. 1386 01:20:23,982 --> 01:20:26,444 That is not what I... (EXHALES) 1387 01:20:29,548 --> 01:20:30,547 (EXHALES) 1388 01:20:32,485 --> 01:20:34,089 How're you doing, Mary? (SCOFFS) 1389 01:20:39,624 --> 01:20:43,032 I know I'm not supposed to be around her. 1390 01:20:43,067 --> 01:20:46,629 You could probably call the police if you wanted to. Oh, Christ. 1391 01:20:46,664 --> 01:20:48,169 You really think I'd do that? 1392 01:20:48,204 --> 01:20:50,974 You fought me pretty hard for full custody. 1393 01:20:51,009 --> 01:20:53,240 And I don't blame you for keeping her from me. 1394 01:20:53,275 --> 01:20:57,409 Charlie, need I remind you that you left us. 1395 01:20:58,181 --> 01:20:59,312 I know. 1396 01:20:59,347 --> 01:21:01,248 And I was left raising our kid 1397 01:21:01,283 --> 01:21:04,581 and explaining to people that my husband left me for a man. 1398 01:21:04,616 --> 01:21:07,155 But you didn't have to cut me out of her life like that. 1399 01:21:07,190 --> 01:21:08,323 Oh, please. 1400 01:21:08,358 --> 01:21:10,488 You were more than happy to forget about us for a while. 1401 01:21:10,523 --> 01:21:11,522 You know that. 1402 01:21:13,460 --> 01:21:15,427 I know I made a lot of mistakes. 1403 01:21:17,662 --> 01:21:20,597 But I just wanted to see her, Mary. 1404 01:21:20,632 --> 01:21:23,105 I've always just... Just wanted to see her. 1405 01:21:24,504 --> 01:21:25,569 It's all about you. 1406 01:21:27,408 --> 01:21:29,144 Even now, huh? 1407 01:21:29,773 --> 01:21:31,542 (CHARLIE SIGHS HEAVILY) 1408 01:21:31,577 --> 01:21:33,247 Now you know why I kept you from her. 1409 01:21:34,316 --> 01:21:35,315 What? 1410 01:21:37,055 --> 01:21:39,990 She's awful. Isn't she? 1411 01:21:40,025 --> 01:21:43,323 She's a terror. And you think it's my fault. 1412 01:21:43,358 --> 01:21:48,163 Wait, is that why you kept her from me all this time? 1413 01:21:48,198 --> 01:21:52,365 Because you thought that I would think that you're a bad mother? 1414 01:21:53,467 --> 01:21:54,466 At first. 1415 01:21:55,733 --> 01:21:58,734 But later, when she was 15, 16, 1416 01:22:01,079 --> 01:22:02,507 I was worried she would hurt you. 1417 01:22:03,147 --> 01:22:04,146 Hurt me? 1418 01:22:05,380 --> 01:22:06,478 It's ridiculous. 1419 01:22:06,513 --> 01:22:08,315 I don't take any pleasure in admitting it. 1420 01:22:08,350 --> 01:22:10,746 I'm her mother, for Christ's sake. 1421 01:22:10,781 --> 01:22:13,584 You know, I spent way too much time telling myself, 1422 01:22:13,619 --> 01:22:16,026 you know, "She's just rebellious, 1423 01:22:16,061 --> 01:22:17,192 "she's just difficult." 1424 01:22:19,559 --> 01:22:22,197 Charlie, she's evil. 1425 01:22:23,563 --> 01:22:24,727 She's not evil. 1426 01:22:31,472 --> 01:22:32,504 What are you doing? 1427 01:22:38,446 --> 01:22:40,050 (MARY TYPING) You think it's just me? 1428 01:22:51,756 --> 01:22:55,098 "There'll be a grease fire in hell when he starts to burn." 1429 01:23:02,536 --> 01:23:03,535 Don't feel bad. 1430 01:23:05,110 --> 01:23:07,242 I've made quite a few appearances on that thing. 1431 01:23:10,874 --> 01:23:12,247 She's a strong writer. 1432 01:23:14,416 --> 01:23:16,185 (RAISES VOICE) That's your response? 1433 01:23:16,220 --> 01:23:17,285 This isn't evil. 1434 01:23:17,782 --> 01:23:19,386 This is honesty. 1435 01:23:19,421 --> 01:23:21,817 Do you know how much bullshit I've read in my life? 1436 01:23:21,852 --> 01:23:24,688 My God, I don't understand you, Charlie! 1437 01:23:24,723 --> 01:23:26,723 Every time I call and ask you how she's doing, 1438 01:23:26,758 --> 01:23:28,098 you say, "She's fine." 1439 01:23:28,760 --> 01:23:30,331 If she's so evil, then... 1440 01:23:30,366 --> 01:23:31,860 (MARY SHOUTING) What was I supposed to tell you? 1441 01:23:31,895 --> 01:23:34,566 Huh? That she was off making her classmates cry 1442 01:23:34,601 --> 01:23:36,139 or slashing her teachers' tires? 1443 01:23:36,174 --> 01:23:37,437 You didn't want to hear that stuff! 1444 01:23:37,472 --> 01:23:38,571 I could have helped her! 1445 01:23:38,607 --> 01:23:42,145 She doesn't want your help! She doesn't want anyone! 1446 01:23:42,180 --> 01:23:44,147 You think I didn't want her to have a dad? 1447 01:23:44,842 --> 01:23:46,512 She adored you! 1448 01:23:46,547 --> 01:23:48,382 The only reason you married me in the first place 1449 01:23:48,417 --> 01:23:50,219 was to have a kid, I know that! 1450 01:23:50,254 --> 01:23:51,418 Mary, please! 1451 01:23:52,157 --> 01:23:53,222 (MARY SIGHS) 1452 01:23:57,294 --> 01:24:00,493 Well, this brings back memories, doesn't it? 1453 01:24:02,530 --> 01:24:03,628 (SIGHS) 1454 01:24:04,664 --> 01:24:06,202 (WHEEZES, COUGHS) 1455 01:24:19,679 --> 01:24:20,678 Listen. 1456 01:24:23,518 --> 01:24:25,452 I never got to say that I was sorry. 1457 01:24:27,357 --> 01:24:29,720 What would you have to be sorry about? 1458 01:24:29,755 --> 01:24:30,820 That's not what I mean. 1459 01:24:32,494 --> 01:24:33,493 I mean... 1460 01:24:38,269 --> 01:24:40,566 About your friend. 1461 01:24:41,932 --> 01:24:43,140 Oh. 1462 01:24:46,673 --> 01:24:47,738 His name was Alan. 1463 01:24:47,773 --> 01:24:49,443 I know his fucking name, Charlie. 1464 01:24:54,219 --> 01:24:55,218 I saw him once, 1465 01:24:56,815 --> 01:24:58,254 in the Walmart parking lot. 1466 01:24:59,224 --> 01:25:00,090 He wasn't looking too good, 1467 01:25:00,125 --> 01:25:02,159 and I don't think it was long before he... 1468 01:25:04,394 --> 01:25:06,823 Anyway, I had all these things that I... 1469 01:25:06,858 --> 01:25:07,857 I wanted to say to him, 1470 01:25:07,893 --> 01:25:09,760 you know, hurl at him like bricks. (SNIFFLES) 1471 01:25:10,532 --> 01:25:12,499 But I... 1472 01:25:12,534 --> 01:25:14,171 I asked if he wanted some help. 1473 01:25:16,637 --> 01:25:18,637 He let me carry a couple of bags to his car, 1474 01:25:19,937 --> 01:25:21,244 he said thank you, 1475 01:25:22,841 --> 01:25:23,840 and I left. 1476 01:25:27,681 --> 01:25:29,285 I never even told him who I was. 1477 01:25:32,884 --> 01:25:34,389 (WHEEZES SOFTLY) 1478 01:25:35,755 --> 01:25:37,359 (WHEEZING) 1479 01:25:38,395 --> 01:25:39,427 You're wheezing. 1480 01:25:40,793 --> 01:25:43,530 Yeah, it's gotten worse. 1481 01:25:44,434 --> 01:25:45,565 Should I call someone? 1482 01:25:46,304 --> 01:25:48,337 No. Um... 1483 01:25:53,608 --> 01:25:54,706 You'll let me hear? 1484 01:26:03,618 --> 01:26:04,782 (GRUNTS) 1485 01:26:19,634 --> 01:26:20,699 (HOARSELY) How do I sound? 1486 01:26:28,643 --> 01:26:30,973 That was the first time we've all been together 1487 01:26:31,008 --> 01:26:33,778 in almost nine years. Do you realize that? 1488 01:26:33,813 --> 01:26:34,944 (CHUCKLES DRYLY) 1489 01:26:43,559 --> 01:26:45,493 When Ellie was little, 1490 01:26:45,528 --> 01:26:49,266 when we took that trip to the Oregon Coast together, 1491 01:26:50,335 --> 01:26:52,401 Ellie played in the sand, and... 1492 01:26:52,766 --> 01:26:53,864 (SNIFFLES) 1493 01:26:53,899 --> 01:26:55,767 ...we laid out on the beach. 1494 01:26:57,100 --> 01:26:58,737 I went swimming in the ocean. 1495 01:27:01,412 --> 01:27:03,907 That was the last time I ever went swimming, actually. 1496 01:27:06,978 --> 01:27:09,418 I kept cutting my legs on the rocks. 1497 01:27:12,984 --> 01:27:14,984 The water was so cold. 1498 01:27:15,019 --> 01:27:16,491 (OCEAN WAVES SPLASHING) 1499 01:27:26,701 --> 01:27:30,505 And you were so mad that my legs bled 1500 01:27:30,540 --> 01:27:32,804 and stained the seats in the minivan. 1501 01:27:32,839 --> 01:27:34,072 (CHUCKLES) 1502 01:27:34,107 --> 01:27:38,711 And you said, for days after that, I smelled like seawater. 1503 01:27:38,746 --> 01:27:40,680 (CHARLIE LAUGHS) (SNIFFLES) 1504 01:27:40,715 --> 01:27:42,418 (WHEEZES) You remember that? 1505 01:27:42,453 --> 01:27:45,487 (COUGHING) 1506 01:27:46,490 --> 01:27:48,050 (SNIFFLES) 1507 01:27:49,988 --> 01:27:51,328 You sound awful. 1508 01:27:52,826 --> 01:27:55,024 (SIGHS) I'm dying, Mary. 1509 01:27:59,096 --> 01:28:00,095 Fuck you. 1510 01:28:02,033 --> 01:28:03,373 I'm sorry. 1511 01:28:04,838 --> 01:28:05,936 Fuck you. 1512 01:28:08,842 --> 01:28:09,973 (CRYING) For sure? 1513 01:28:10,844 --> 01:28:13,482 Yeah. For sure. 1514 01:28:13,517 --> 01:28:15,616 (CRIES, SIGHS) 1515 01:28:15,651 --> 01:28:16,848 CHARLIE: Listen to me. 1516 01:28:19,853 --> 01:28:22,392 I need to make certain that she's going to be okay. 1517 01:28:23,494 --> 01:28:24,691 We can't give up on her. 1518 01:28:25,529 --> 01:28:27,155 You already gave up on her! 1519 01:28:27,190 --> 01:28:29,124 You gave up on her when she was eight years old! 1520 01:28:29,159 --> 01:28:32,160 I wish I could have been a part of her life, Mary, 1521 01:28:32,195 --> 01:28:34,063 a part of both of your lives. 1522 01:28:34,098 --> 01:28:35,097 Go to the hospital. 1523 01:28:36,474 --> 01:28:38,705 You have money, just go to the hospital! 1524 01:28:39,774 --> 01:28:44,106 We both know that that money is for Ellie. 1525 01:28:45,109 --> 01:28:49,485 But beyond that, 1526 01:28:49,520 --> 01:28:53,588 I need to know that she's gonna have a decent life. 1527 01:28:54,723 --> 01:28:56,921 Where she cares about people 1528 01:28:56,956 --> 01:28:59,055 and other people care about her. 1529 01:29:00,564 --> 01:29:02,564 (CRYING) And she's gonna be okay. 1530 01:29:03,567 --> 01:29:04,533 I need to go. Mary. 1531 01:29:04,568 --> 01:29:08,097 She doesn't have anyone else! I have to go. 1532 01:29:08,132 --> 01:29:10,770 (CRYING) I need to know that I have done 1533 01:29:10,805 --> 01:29:13,608 one thing right with my life! 1534 01:29:17,174 --> 01:29:18,580 We both played our parts. 1535 01:29:20,078 --> 01:29:22,617 I raised her, and you're giving her the money. 1536 01:29:23,246 --> 01:29:24,553 It's the best we could do. 1537 01:29:26,623 --> 01:29:27,754 (SIGHS) 1538 01:29:30,627 --> 01:29:31,626 Do you need anything 1539 01:29:33,058 --> 01:29:34,090 before I leave? 1540 01:29:35,093 --> 01:29:36,433 Water, or something. 1541 01:29:37,667 --> 01:29:39,062 (COUGHS) 1542 01:29:44,267 --> 01:29:45,673 (SIGHS) 1543 01:29:45,972 --> 01:29:47,169 (COUGHS) 1544 01:29:58,589 --> 01:29:59,720 (PHONE BUTTON BEEPS) 1545 01:29:59,755 --> 01:30:02,151 (SNORING) (THUNDER RUMBLES) 1546 01:30:03,792 --> 01:30:05,759 (RAIN POURING) 1547 01:30:07,994 --> 01:30:10,533 (THUNDER RUMBLING) 1548 01:30:10,568 --> 01:30:11,963 (COUGHS) 1549 01:30:26,012 --> 01:30:27,583 (WATER TRICKLING) 1550 01:30:45,867 --> 01:30:47,196 (KNOCK AT DOOR) 1551 01:30:47,231 --> 01:30:48,868 DAN: Gambino's! 1552 01:30:48,903 --> 01:30:51,002 (CHARLIE COUGHING) Yeah. 1553 01:30:51,037 --> 01:30:52,036 DAN: Charlie? 1554 01:30:53,237 --> 01:30:54,236 You okay? 1555 01:30:56,042 --> 01:30:57,910 CHARLIE: Yeah. (CLEARS THROAT) 1556 01:30:59,584 --> 01:31:01,111 The money is in the, um... 1557 01:31:02,686 --> 01:31:03,718 DAN: Sure. 1558 01:31:03,753 --> 01:31:04,950 (MAILBOX OPENS) 1559 01:31:07,790 --> 01:31:09,152 DAN: You sure you're doing okay? 1560 01:31:11,255 --> 01:31:13,255 Yeah. Thanks, Dan. 1561 01:31:13,290 --> 01:31:15,092 DAN: Have a good night, okay? 1562 01:31:15,765 --> 01:31:16,863 (MAILBOX CLOSES) 1563 01:31:22,068 --> 01:31:24,002 (RAIN POURING HEAVILY) 1564 01:31:40,856 --> 01:31:41,855 (MUMBLES) 1565 01:31:54,804 --> 01:31:56,936 (INTENSE MUSIC PLAYING) 1566 01:32:09,115 --> 01:32:11,115 (BREATHING HEAVILY) 1567 01:32:16,760 --> 01:32:18,287 (THUNDER RUMBLING) 1568 01:32:25,395 --> 01:32:26,801 (TYPING) 1569 01:32:35,372 --> 01:32:37,009 (WHISPERING) Fuck these essays. 1570 01:32:38,078 --> 01:32:39,242 Fuck these readings. 1571 01:32:41,818 --> 01:32:45,919 Just write something fucking honest. (BANGING KEYBOARD) 1572 01:32:49,727 --> 01:32:50,726 (SLAMS LAPTOP SHUT) 1573 01:32:51,256 --> 01:32:52,255 (SIGHS) 1574 01:32:55,227 --> 01:32:57,359 (INTENSE MUSIC CONTINUES) 1575 01:33:39,942 --> 01:33:41,337 (RETCHES) 1576 01:33:41,372 --> 01:33:42,811 (SPITS) 1577 01:33:42,846 --> 01:33:44,747 (COUGHS, WHEEZES) 1578 01:33:45,442 --> 01:33:47,112 (GASPS) 1579 01:33:47,444 --> 01:33:50,313 (COUGHING) 1580 01:33:54,319 --> 01:33:56,154 (CONTINUES COUGHING) 1581 01:33:57,454 --> 01:33:58,827 (STIFLES SOB) 1582 01:33:59,357 --> 01:34:01,489 (SOBBING) 1583 01:34:01,524 --> 01:34:03,227 (COUGHS, SOBS) 1584 01:34:08,938 --> 01:34:11,169 (CONTINUES SOBBING) 1585 01:34:11,204 --> 01:34:12,709 (COUGHS) 1586 01:34:15,780 --> 01:34:16,944 (KNOCK AT DOOR) 1587 01:34:16,979 --> 01:34:18,308 (GASPS) Liz? 1588 01:34:20,180 --> 01:34:22,213 (KNOCKING CONTINUES) 1589 01:34:22,248 --> 01:34:23,379 THOMAS: Can I come inside? 1590 01:34:25,152 --> 01:34:26,184 It's not locked. 1591 01:34:28,452 --> 01:34:29,759 Hi. What's wrong? 1592 01:34:30,421 --> 01:34:31,926 Thank you. For what? 1593 01:34:31,961 --> 01:34:34,830 Look, I'm not exactly who I said I was. 1594 01:34:34,865 --> 01:34:36,458 I'm not from New Life. 1595 01:34:36,493 --> 01:34:38,064 What? I... I don't... 1596 01:34:38,099 --> 01:34:40,033 I've been in a pretty bad place recently. 1597 01:34:40,068 --> 01:34:41,430 I... I stole some money, 1598 01:34:41,465 --> 01:34:43,465 and I ran away from home a few months ago. 1599 01:34:43,500 --> 01:34:46,336 And your daughter, she took these pictures of me smoking pot, 1600 01:34:46,371 --> 01:34:48,778 and a recording or something like that, 1601 01:34:48,813 --> 01:34:50,978 and she found my church in Waterloo somehow, 1602 01:34:51,013 --> 01:34:52,177 and then she sent it to them, 1603 01:34:52,212 --> 01:34:53,915 and they sent it to my parents... Wait. 1604 01:34:53,950 --> 01:34:55,147 ...and you know what they said? 1605 01:34:56,084 --> 01:34:57,116 "It's just money." 1606 01:34:58,218 --> 01:35:00,119 And they forgive me. 1607 01:35:00,154 --> 01:35:02,924 And they love me, and they want me to come home. 1608 01:35:04,521 --> 01:35:06,059 How awful is that? 1609 01:35:07,161 --> 01:35:09,832 Ellie, she... She did all that? 1610 01:35:09,867 --> 01:35:14,100 I can't tell if she was trying to help me or hurt me or... 1611 01:35:14,135 --> 01:35:15,431 Do you ever get that feeling from her? (CHUCKLES) 1612 01:35:15,466 --> 01:35:17,103 How did she even... She... 1613 01:35:18,975 --> 01:35:21,844 She found your church, she tracked down your parents. 1614 01:35:23,177 --> 01:35:24,473 She really did all that? 1615 01:35:24,508 --> 01:35:26,211 Yeah. I mean, I'm going home tomorrow. 1616 01:35:27,313 --> 01:35:28,950 But, Charlie, before I go... (LAUGHS) 1617 01:35:28,985 --> 01:35:30,380 ...I have to show you this. 1618 01:35:30,415 --> 01:35:32,316 (BREATHES UNCOMFORTABLY) 1619 01:35:32,351 --> 01:35:33,955 What... What's wrong? (GRUNTS HEAVILY) 1620 01:35:33,990 --> 01:35:35,220 Wait, are you okay? 1621 01:35:35,255 --> 01:35:37,255 It just hurts. Charlie, 1622 01:35:37,290 --> 01:35:39,521 I want to help you. I know I can help you. 1623 01:35:39,556 --> 01:35:41,457 I'm not going to the hospital. 1624 01:35:41,492 --> 01:35:42,997 No, I know. I'm not gonna make you go. 1625 01:35:43,032 --> 01:35:44,295 But I can help you. 1626 01:35:46,266 --> 01:35:47,870 "Therefore, brothers and sisters..." What are you doing? 1627 01:35:47,905 --> 01:35:49,201 "...we have an obligation, 1628 01:35:49,236 --> 01:35:51,434 "but it is not to the flesh, to live according to it. 1629 01:35:51,469 --> 01:35:54,206 "For if you live according to the flesh, you will die. 1630 01:35:54,241 --> 01:35:56,571 "But if by the Spirit you put to death 1631 01:35:56,606 --> 01:35:59,178 "the misdeeds of the body, then you will live." 1632 01:35:59,213 --> 01:36:01,081 I... I don't understand. 1633 01:36:01,116 --> 01:36:04,018 Charlie, when I read this, I finally got it. 1634 01:36:04,053 --> 01:36:07,384 I finally understood why God brought me here to you. 1635 01:36:07,419 --> 01:36:09,551 So I could help you understand what happened to Alan, 1636 01:36:09,586 --> 01:36:11,091 so it doesn't happen to you, too. 1637 01:36:14,129 --> 01:36:15,062 How did you get this? 1638 01:36:15,097 --> 01:36:18,494 Charlie, Alan tried to escape God's will. 1639 01:36:18,529 --> 01:36:20,903 He chose his life with you over God. 1640 01:36:20,938 --> 01:36:24,500 But this is why he was so obsessed with this verse. 1641 01:36:24,535 --> 01:36:26,304 He knew that he was living in the flesh, 1642 01:36:26,339 --> 01:36:27,572 and not in the Spirit. 1643 01:36:27,607 --> 01:36:30,946 He never prayed for salvation, but it's not too late for you. 1644 01:36:30,981 --> 01:36:32,541 Through the Spirit, you can put to death 1645 01:36:32,576 --> 01:36:34,917 the misdeeds of the body, and you will live. 1646 01:36:36,514 --> 01:36:39,053 You think Alan died because he chose to be with me? 1647 01:36:41,354 --> 01:36:42,991 You think God turned his back on him 1648 01:36:43,026 --> 01:36:44,190 because he and I were in love? 1649 01:36:48,427 --> 01:36:49,426 Yes. 1650 01:36:54,334 --> 01:36:55,267 (SIGHS) 1651 01:36:58,041 --> 01:37:00,338 You know something? I wasn't always this big. 1652 01:37:01,704 --> 01:37:03,979 Yeah, I know. 1653 01:37:04,014 --> 01:37:06,311 I mean, I wasn't the best-looking guy in the room, but... 1654 01:37:08,018 --> 01:37:09,017 Alan loved me. 1655 01:37:12,088 --> 01:37:13,186 He thought I was beautiful. 1656 01:37:17,720 --> 01:37:18,928 Okay. 1657 01:37:21,130 --> 01:37:22,899 Halfway through the semester, 1658 01:37:24,331 --> 01:37:27,970 he started meeting me during my office hours. 1659 01:37:28,005 --> 01:37:32,172 And we were... We were crazy about one another. 1660 01:37:32,207 --> 01:37:34,240 But we waited 1661 01:37:34,275 --> 01:37:37,012 until the class was over before... 1662 01:37:37,047 --> 01:37:38,080 This isn't, uh... 1663 01:37:38,115 --> 01:37:41,445 It was just after classes had ended for the year. 1664 01:37:41,480 --> 01:37:43,381 It was perfect temperature outside. 1665 01:37:44,450 --> 01:37:46,351 We took a walk in the arboretum, 1666 01:37:48,993 --> 01:37:50,025 and we kissed. 1667 01:37:50,522 --> 01:37:52,291 Charlie, stop. 1668 01:37:52,326 --> 01:37:55,657 We would spend entire nights lying together, naked. 1669 01:37:58,266 --> 01:37:59,364 We would make love. 1670 01:38:05,075 --> 01:38:06,173 We would make love. 1671 01:38:09,442 --> 01:38:11,112 Do you find that disgusting? 1672 01:38:11,147 --> 01:38:12,740 Charlie, God is ready to help you. 1673 01:38:12,775 --> 01:38:16,315 Oh, I hope that there isn't a God, 1674 01:38:16,350 --> 01:38:19,054 because I hate to think that there's an afterlife, 1675 01:38:19,089 --> 01:38:22,552 and that Alan can see what I have done to myself. 1676 01:38:22,587 --> 01:38:25,654 Charlie... That he can see my swollen feet 1677 01:38:25,689 --> 01:38:27,557 and the sores on my skin, 1678 01:38:27,592 --> 01:38:29,031 and the patches of mold 1679 01:38:29,066 --> 01:38:30,329 in between the flaps. Stop. 1680 01:38:30,364 --> 01:38:32,397 The infected ulcers on my ass, 1681 01:38:32,432 --> 01:38:36,104 and the sack of fat on my back that turned brown last year. 1682 01:38:36,139 --> 01:38:38,106 Okay, stop! This is disgusting? 1683 01:38:38,141 --> 01:38:40,207 Yes! I'm disgusting? 1684 01:38:40,242 --> 01:38:42,110 (SHOUTING) Yes, you're disgusting! You're... 1685 01:38:53,552 --> 01:38:55,321 (BREATH SHUDDERING, WHISPERING) I'm sorry. 1686 01:38:59,129 --> 01:39:00,128 What? 1687 01:39:03,463 --> 01:39:05,463 Go home to your family. 1688 01:39:16,146 --> 01:39:18,344 (CHARLIE COUGHS) (DOOR OPENS) 1689 01:39:19,743 --> 01:39:24,053 (DOOR CLOSES) (CONTINUES COUGHING) 1690 01:39:25,716 --> 01:39:27,353 (COUGHS HEAVILY) 1691 01:39:54,679 --> 01:39:57,548 CHARLIE: Well, your complaints have been heard. 1692 01:39:58,386 --> 01:39:59,550 I've been replaced 1693 01:39:59,585 --> 01:40:01,717 by someone who will, no doubt, 1694 01:40:01,752 --> 01:40:05,193 have you rewrite, and rewrite, and rewrite, 1695 01:40:05,657 --> 01:40:08,163 be more objective, 1696 01:40:08,825 --> 01:40:10,231 less authentic, 1697 01:40:10,266 --> 01:40:12,761 less you, with every draft. 1698 01:40:15,733 --> 01:40:19,438 But some of you saw my post 1699 01:40:19,473 --> 01:40:22,408 about writing something honest. 1700 01:40:25,743 --> 01:40:26,742 And... 1701 01:40:28,152 --> 01:40:29,151 (SIGHS) 1702 01:40:30,286 --> 01:40:32,088 ...the things that some of you wrote... 1703 01:40:33,916 --> 01:40:35,355 Kristy, you wrote, 1704 01:40:36,457 --> 01:40:39,524 "My parents want me to be a radiologist, 1705 01:40:39,559 --> 01:40:42,164 "but I don't even know what that is." 1706 01:40:48,700 --> 01:40:50,238 Julian, you wrote, 1707 01:40:50,273 --> 01:40:53,571 "I'm sick of people telling me that I have promise." 1708 01:41:01,383 --> 01:41:02,448 Adam, you wrote, 1709 01:41:03,616 --> 01:41:05,517 "I think I need to accept that my life 1710 01:41:05,552 --> 01:41:07,882 "isn't going to be very exciting." 1711 01:41:11,228 --> 01:41:15,593 You all wrote these amazing, honest things, and... 1712 01:41:17,729 --> 01:41:19,828 you've been so honest with me that I... I... 1713 01:41:23,405 --> 01:41:24,536 (GRUNTS SOFTLY) 1714 01:41:25,506 --> 01:41:26,835 ...I just want to be... 1715 01:41:28,410 --> 01:41:29,805 honest with you, too. 1716 01:41:30,874 --> 01:41:32,214 (EXHALES) 1717 01:41:35,681 --> 01:41:37,714 (BREATHES DEEPLY) 1718 01:42:05,414 --> 01:42:06,644 (SIGHS HEAVILY) 1719 01:42:12,014 --> 01:42:13,717 These assignments don't matter. 1720 01:42:15,523 --> 01:42:16,753 This course doesn't matter. 1721 01:42:18,889 --> 01:42:20,229 College doesn't matter. 1722 01:42:22,563 --> 01:42:25,498 These amazing, honest things that you wrote, 1723 01:42:29,537 --> 01:42:30,635 they matter. 1724 01:42:34,674 --> 01:42:35,772 (LAPTOP CRASHES) 1725 01:42:38,007 --> 01:42:39,875 (CHARLIE WHEEZES) 1726 01:42:50,019 --> 01:42:51,425 (CHARLIE COUGHS) 1727 01:43:06,002 --> 01:43:07,870 (WHEEZING CONTINUES) 1728 01:43:12,074 --> 01:43:13,711 I'm sorry. Don't. 1729 01:43:20,456 --> 01:43:21,950 (BREATHES ERRATICALLY) 1730 01:43:25,021 --> 01:43:26,394 (SUPPRESSES GRUNT) 1731 01:43:30,334 --> 01:43:32,763 I really hate you for putting me through this again, you know that? 1732 01:43:35,900 --> 01:43:37,438 Those last few months before Alan... 1733 01:43:38,936 --> 01:43:41,442 I'd come over here, shake him, scream at him, 1734 01:43:41,477 --> 01:43:43,477 just trying to get him to fucking eat something. 1735 01:43:43,512 --> 01:43:46,040 God, that was awful! It was awful for me, too. 1736 01:43:46,075 --> 01:43:47,448 Yeah? Well, you weren't the one 1737 01:43:47,483 --> 01:43:48,878 who had to identify his body, 1738 01:43:48,913 --> 01:43:50,616 all bloated... They wouldn't let me. 1739 01:43:52,081 --> 01:43:53,487 I wasn't family. 1740 01:43:55,051 --> 01:43:56,358 (SIGHS) 1741 01:44:02,630 --> 01:44:04,630 (CHARLIE COUGHS AND WHEEZES) 1742 01:44:07,635 --> 01:44:09,734 I got you two meatball subs. Extra cheese. 1743 01:44:15,104 --> 01:44:16,840 (SIGHS, SNIFFLES) 1744 01:44:16,875 --> 01:44:18,006 I don't know what I'm doing. 1745 01:44:24,487 --> 01:44:26,718 (BREATHES HEAVILY) 1746 01:44:26,753 --> 01:44:28,885 I'm not going to the hospital. 1747 01:44:28,920 --> 01:44:30,458 I'm not asking you to. 1748 01:44:35,861 --> 01:44:37,696 I can't do this anymore. 1749 01:44:40,800 --> 01:44:42,536 I tried to save him, Liz. 1750 01:44:45,805 --> 01:44:47,739 I thought that if I just loved him, 1751 01:44:50,678 --> 01:44:52,480 that he wouldn't need anyone else. 1752 01:44:55,452 --> 01:44:56,880 I told him he didn't need God, 1753 01:44:58,180 --> 01:45:01,522 he didn't need anyone but me. 1754 01:45:03,427 --> 01:45:04,426 Charlie, 1755 01:45:05,891 --> 01:45:07,693 all I know is that you gave Alan 1756 01:45:07,728 --> 01:45:08,958 the best years of his life. 1757 01:45:08,993 --> 01:45:10,564 If it weren't for you, he would have jumped off 1758 01:45:10,599 --> 01:45:12,566 that bridge years earlier. (SHUDDERS) 1759 01:45:13,162 --> 01:45:14,535 Nobody could've saved him. 1760 01:45:14,570 --> 01:45:16,438 Believe me, I spent years trying. 1761 01:45:17,067 --> 01:45:18,704 (BREATHES HEAVILY) 1762 01:45:20,477 --> 01:45:23,071 I don't think I believe anyone can save anyone. 1763 01:45:29,552 --> 01:45:30,617 She saved him. 1764 01:45:33,083 --> 01:45:37,184 She wasn't trying to hurt him. She was trying to help him. 1765 01:45:37,219 --> 01:45:39,153 Who are you talking about? 1766 01:45:39,188 --> 01:45:41,628 He's going home. She did that. 1767 01:45:42,895 --> 01:45:44,994 Charlie... She didn't do it to hurt him, 1768 01:45:45,799 --> 01:45:48,030 she did it to send him home. 1769 01:45:49,605 --> 01:45:51,935 Do you feel light-headed? Charlie, look at me. 1770 01:45:51,970 --> 01:45:54,575 She was trying to help him. Who? 1771 01:45:55,644 --> 01:45:59,173 Ellie. She was trying to help him, 1772 01:45:59,208 --> 01:46:01,109 She just wanted to send him home. 1773 01:46:03,817 --> 01:46:07,654 Do you ever get the feeling that... 1774 01:46:09,559 --> 01:46:12,923 people are incapable of not caring? 1775 01:46:18,502 --> 01:46:19,930 People are amazing. 1776 01:46:21,505 --> 01:46:22,537 (DOOR OPENS) 1777 01:46:23,639 --> 01:46:24,704 What the fuck did you do? 1778 01:46:27,841 --> 01:46:28,873 What's wrong with him? 1779 01:46:31,042 --> 01:46:32,041 He's dying. 1780 01:46:33,946 --> 01:46:35,616 So, call someone. 1781 01:46:35,651 --> 01:46:37,486 (SOFTLY) No. Call a fucking ambulance! 1782 01:46:38,115 --> 01:46:39,114 Liz. 1783 01:46:40,117 --> 01:46:41,523 I need to talk to him. 1784 01:46:41,558 --> 01:46:42,788 I'm not leaving you alone with him. 1785 01:46:42,823 --> 01:46:44,251 I need to talk to him alone. 1786 01:46:44,286 --> 01:46:45,494 (SOFTLY) Liz. 1787 01:46:48,290 --> 01:46:49,531 Please. 1788 01:46:54,098 --> 01:46:55,097 Okay. 1789 01:47:01,710 --> 01:47:03,512 (STIFLED SOBBING) 1790 01:47:12,853 --> 01:47:13,984 LIZ: I'll call someone. 1791 01:47:16,923 --> 01:47:17,922 Charlie. 1792 01:47:21,059 --> 01:47:22,663 I'll wait downstairs. 1793 01:47:30,134 --> 01:47:32,134 Why did you do that? (CHUCKLING) What? 1794 01:47:34,578 --> 01:47:35,577 I failed. 1795 01:47:36,206 --> 01:47:37,810 It's a really good essay. 1796 01:47:37,845 --> 01:47:40,780 Are you just trying to screw me over one last time? 1797 01:47:40,815 --> 01:47:42,815 I don't care about you! I don't care that you're dying. 1798 01:47:42,850 --> 01:47:44,179 Do you want me to fail out of high school? 1799 01:47:44,214 --> 01:47:46,181 Is that why you did this? I didn't write it. 1800 01:47:46,216 --> 01:47:48,722 This is the essay that you gave me yesterday. 1801 01:47:48,757 --> 01:47:50,592 You didn't read it. I don't need to read it. 1802 01:47:51,056 --> 01:47:52,055 Read it. 1803 01:47:56,193 --> 01:47:58,094 (BREATHING LABORIOUSLY) 1804 01:48:03,673 --> 01:48:04,672 This is... 1805 01:48:06,071 --> 01:48:07,609 I know what this is. 1806 01:48:07,644 --> 01:48:09,710 (CHUCKLING) I knew you would. 1807 01:48:10,779 --> 01:48:11,778 I wrote this. 1808 01:48:14,046 --> 01:48:15,782 You never forget anything. 1809 01:48:15,817 --> 01:48:18,686 I wrote this in eighth grade for English. Why do you... 1810 01:48:18,721 --> 01:48:20,787 "And I felt saddest of all 1811 01:48:20,822 --> 01:48:23,053 "when I read the boring chapters 1812 01:48:23,088 --> 01:48:25,924 "that were only descriptions of whales, 1813 01:48:25,959 --> 01:48:28,960 "because I knew that 1814 01:48:28,995 --> 01:48:32,634 "the author was just trying to save us 1815 01:48:32,669 --> 01:48:34,933 "from his own sad story, 1816 01:48:36,937 --> 01:48:38,805 "just for a little while." 1817 01:48:38,840 --> 01:48:40,609 (CHARLIE CHUCKLES) (SNIFFLES) 1818 01:48:40,644 --> 01:48:43,304 How do you have this? Your mother, 1819 01:48:43,339 --> 01:48:45,372 she sent it to me four years ago. 1820 01:48:45,407 --> 01:48:48,144 I wanted to know how you were doing in school, 1821 01:48:48,179 --> 01:48:49,948 and she sent it. 1822 01:48:49,983 --> 01:48:53,215 And it's the best essay I've ever read. 1823 01:48:53,250 --> 01:48:54,953 (SOBBING) Why are you fucking with me like this? 1824 01:48:55,923 --> 01:48:56,922 I'm not. 1825 01:48:57,991 --> 01:49:01,355 (SOBS) I'm sorry for leaving you. 1826 01:49:03,700 --> 01:49:07,097 I was in love, and... 1827 01:49:07,132 --> 01:49:09,000 (INHALES LABORIOUSLY) I left you behind. 1828 01:49:10,938 --> 01:49:14,302 You did not deserve that. I don't... 1829 01:49:14,337 --> 01:49:16,777 I don't know how (INHALES LABORIOUSLY) 1830 01:49:16,812 --> 01:49:18,713 I could have done such a thing. 1831 01:49:18,748 --> 01:49:21,012 You're so beautiful. (SOBS) 1832 01:49:21,047 --> 01:49:22,948 You're amazing. Stop. 1833 01:49:25,249 --> 01:49:27,986 You're amazing. (SOBS) 1834 01:49:28,824 --> 01:49:30,956 This essay is amazing. 1835 01:49:32,729 --> 01:49:35,191 This essay is you. 1836 01:49:35,226 --> 01:49:36,357 Stop saying that. 1837 01:49:36,392 --> 01:49:39,998 This essay is you. Stop saying that! 1838 01:49:40,033 --> 01:49:43,133 You're the best thing I have ever done. 1839 01:49:43,168 --> 01:49:44,706 (CRIES OUT IN PAIN) 1840 01:49:44,741 --> 01:49:46,840 (COUGHS) What's the matter? 1841 01:49:46,875 --> 01:49:47,907 Ellie! 1842 01:49:47,942 --> 01:49:49,876 No. Okay, I can't be here right now. 1843 01:49:49,911 --> 01:49:51,273 I have to go. You're perfect. 1844 01:49:51,880 --> 01:49:53,011 You'll be happy. 1845 01:49:54,344 --> 01:49:57,213 You care about people. (SOBS) 1846 01:49:57,248 --> 01:49:58,885 The ambulance is coming, they'll help you. 1847 01:49:58,920 --> 01:50:00,348 No. They won't. 1848 01:50:00,383 --> 01:50:03,252 You're going to the hospital. No. 1849 01:50:03,287 --> 01:50:05,320 You just need surgery, or something! 1850 01:50:05,355 --> 01:50:09,291 Read it to me. (GRUNTS) What? 1851 01:50:09,326 --> 01:50:12,833 (STRUGGLING) If you want to help, read it to me. 1852 01:50:13,836 --> 01:50:16,804 You'll help if you read it. 1853 01:50:16,839 --> 01:50:19,103 You asshole. You fat fucking asshole! 1854 01:50:19,138 --> 01:50:20,170 You'll help... Fuck you. 1855 01:50:20,205 --> 01:50:21,468 Please. Fuck you! 1856 01:50:21,503 --> 01:50:22,777 Ellie! 1857 01:50:26,211 --> 01:50:27,408 (SOBBING) Daddy, please. 1858 01:50:35,451 --> 01:50:36,989 (ELLIE SNIFFLING) 1859 01:50:46,396 --> 01:50:50,002 "In the amazing book, Moby Dick, by the author Herman Melville, 1860 01:50:50,037 --> 01:50:52,939 "the author recounts his story of being at sea. 1861 01:50:52,974 --> 01:50:54,303 "In the first part of his book, 1862 01:50:54,338 --> 01:50:56,338 "the author, calling himself Ishmael, 1863 01:50:56,373 --> 01:50:58,109 "is in a small seaside town 1864 01:50:58,144 --> 01:51:01,178 "and he is sharing a bed with a man named Queequeg. 1865 01:51:01,213 --> 01:51:03,510 "The author and Queequeg go to church 1866 01:51:03,545 --> 01:51:04,984 "and later set out on a ship 1867 01:51:05,019 --> 01:51:06,447 "captained by a pirate named Ahab, 1868 01:51:06,482 --> 01:51:07,888 "who is missing a leg, 1869 01:51:08,924 --> 01:51:10,517 "and very much wants to kill the whale 1870 01:51:10,552 --> 01:51:13,795 "which is named Moby Dick, and which is white. 1871 01:51:13,830 --> 01:51:15,830 "In the course of the book, 1872 01:51:15,865 --> 01:51:18,228 "the pirate Ahab encounters many hardships." (GRUNTS) 1873 01:51:18,263 --> 01:51:21,770 "His entire life is set around trying to kill a certain whale." 1874 01:51:21,805 --> 01:51:23,332 (PANTING) "I think this is sad 1875 01:51:23,367 --> 01:51:25,037 "because this whale doesn't have any emotions, 1876 01:51:25,072 --> 01:51:27,468 "and doesn't know how bad Ahab wants to kill him. 1877 01:51:27,503 --> 01:51:28,843 "He's just a poor 1878 01:51:29,373 --> 01:51:32,011 "big animal." 1879 01:51:32,046 --> 01:51:35,014 (CHARLIE GASPS FOR BREATH) 1880 01:51:35,049 --> 01:51:37,115 "And I feel bad for Ahab as well, 1881 01:51:37,150 --> 01:51:38,787 "because he thinks that his life will be better 1882 01:51:38,822 --> 01:51:40,349 "if he can just kill this whale, 1883 01:51:40,384 --> 01:51:42,219 "but in reality, it won't help him at all." 1884 01:51:43,255 --> 01:51:45,860 (CHARLIE BREATHING SHALLOWLY) 1885 01:51:45,895 --> 01:51:48,423 "I was very saddened by this book, 1886 01:51:48,458 --> 01:51:50,458 "and I felt many emotions for the characters. 1887 01:51:53,298 --> 01:51:54,803 "And I felt saddest of all 1888 01:51:54,838 --> 01:51:56,035 "when I read the boring chapters 1889 01:51:56,070 --> 01:51:58,103 "that were only descriptions of whales, 1890 01:51:58,138 --> 01:52:00,270 "because I knew that the author was just trying 1891 01:52:00,305 --> 01:52:02,140 "to save us from his own sad story, 1892 01:52:03,011 --> 01:52:04,109 "just for a little while." 1893 01:52:04,144 --> 01:52:05,506 (GASPING) 1894 01:52:05,541 --> 01:52:07,112 (WAVES LAPPING) 1895 01:52:07,147 --> 01:52:09,147 (EMOTIONAL MUSIC PLAYING) 1896 01:52:12,152 --> 01:52:14,053 "This book made me think about my own life, 1897 01:52:15,419 --> 01:52:17,925 "and then it made me feel glad for my..." 1898 01:52:17,960 --> 01:52:19,454 (BREATHING ERRATICALLY) 1899 01:52:21,392 --> 01:52:22,457 (LAUGHING) 1900 01:52:22,492 --> 01:52:23,524 (CHUCKLES) 1901 01:52:23,559 --> 01:52:25,229 (MUSIC SWELLS) 1902 01:52:25,264 --> 01:52:26,263 (GASPS) 1903 01:52:34,471 --> 01:52:36,075 (WAVES CRASHING) 1904 01:52:37,408 --> 01:52:39,947 (EMOTIONAL MUSIC CONTINUES) 1905 01:54:01,195 --> 01:54:03,195 (GRIM MUSIC PLAYING) 1906 01:54:12,371 --> 01:54:14,371 (WAVES CRASHING GENTLY) 126144

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