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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,519 --> 00:00:06,499 "Teddy Thompson, Pasadena" s number one real estate agent. 2 00:00:06,523 --> 00:00:07,638 Don"t just dream it. 3 00:00:07,662 --> 00:00:09,330 - "Own it." - Own it! 4 00:00:09,354 --> 00:00:12,298 That picture"s plastered on the side of every bus in town. 5 00:00:12,322 --> 00:00:13,472 Mmm. 6 00:00:13,496 --> 00:00:14,645 Ironic that yesterday 7 00:00:14,669 --> 00:00:16,371 I got plastered on the front of one. 8 00:00:16,395 --> 00:00:18,995 Ooh, well, I will not use the word "plastered" in your obituary. 9 00:00:19,019 --> 00:00:20,997 Uh, "splattered"? Oh, I"ll work on it. 10 00:00:21,021 --> 00:00:23,482 So this is a real fixer-upper. 11 00:00:23,506 --> 00:00:24,931 When are you gonna fix it? 12 00:00:24,955 --> 00:00:26,899 Morning, Nell. Haven"t received your rent yet. 13 00:00:26,923 --> 00:00:31,386 Also, there is something aggressively stinking up your side of the refrigerator. 14 00:00:31,410 --> 00:00:36,046 Oh, sorry. I... I don"t have any more checks or money. 15 00:00:36,070 --> 00:00:38,324 And, um, that smell is a combination 16 00:00:38,348 --> 00:00:40,671 of leftover soups from last week I"m gonna have for lunch today. 17 00:00:40,695 --> 00:00:44,675 Gross. Just make sure you remove your Frankensoups from the apartment 18 00:00:44,699 --> 00:00:46,332 on your way to work, which is none of my business, 19 00:00:46,356 --> 00:00:48,541 but I do think that should"ve been, like, 20 minutes ago. 20 00:00:48,565 --> 00:00:51,510 What? What? No. Damn it! Ugh! 21 00:00:51,534 --> 00:00:53,270 So, you"re a renter? 22 00:00:53,294 --> 00:00:55,755 I just don"t think I can represent you. 23 00:00:55,779 --> 00:00:59,207 When I died, I was this close to closing on a $10 million listing. 24 00:00:59,231 --> 00:01:01,682 I"m strictly in the luxury market. 25 00:01:02,407 --> 00:01:03,867 What kind of property am I? 26 00:01:03,891 --> 00:01:06,652 A condo near the airport whose value is depreciating. 27 00:01:07,239 --> 00:01:09,183 I am not depreciating. 28 00:01:09,207 --> 00:01:11,530 If you could send it out for me, that would be great. Thank you. 29 00:01:11,554 --> 00:01:13,394 - Sam! Ugh. - Hey! 30 00:01:13,418 --> 00:01:15,258 - Sam, am I depreciating? - Mm-hmm? 31 00:01:15,282 --> 00:01:17,777 Oh, is this a skin care thing? Because if so, I have an off-brand retinol 32 00:01:17,801 --> 00:01:20,711 that"ll just burn an entire layer off of your face by Monday. 33 00:01:20,735 --> 00:01:23,059 Ooh, no. Ah. I mean, metaphorically. 34 00:01:23,083 --> 00:01:25,613 I-I-I"m afraid I might be growing mold in my basement. 35 00:01:25,637 --> 00:01:27,787 Oh, yeah, honey. I don"t think I have a cream for that. 36 00:01:27,811 --> 00:01:30,445 I"ve been here for a year, you know. Do they consider me an asset? 37 00:01:30,469 --> 00:01:34,553 What? Of course they do. You are smart, you are fun to be around, 38 00:01:34,577 --> 00:01:37,314 and you are the only one strong enough to lift the Sparkletts. 39 00:01:37,338 --> 00:01:40,110 All right, people, listen up. It"s time for some housecleaning. 40 00:01:40,134 --> 00:01:44,459 Now, my father, the owner and publisher of this paper, the reason you"re all alive, 41 00:01:44,483 --> 00:01:48,222 is coming here today, and everything needs to be perfect. 42 00:01:48,246 --> 00:01:50,327 I"m not stressed. You"re not stressed. Nobody"s stressed. 43 00:01:50,351 --> 00:01:53,296 All right? So why don"t we just all clear our cubicles 44 00:01:53,320 --> 00:01:56,161 of any unprofessional and non-news-related personal effects? 45 00:01:56,185 --> 00:01:58,404 What is this? "Live, laugh, love." 46 00:01:58,428 --> 00:02:00,361 More like, "Barf, barf, barf." 47 00:02:02,087 --> 00:02:04,652 Sam, can I stash a couple photos of the kids in here? 48 00:02:04,676 --> 00:02:07,758 They"re adorable and joyful, everything Mr. Rhodes hates. 49 00:02:07,782 --> 00:02:09,588 - Yeah, sure. Bring it in. - Okay. 50 00:02:09,612 --> 00:02:11,141 - Oh, God. - What? 51 00:02:11,165 --> 00:02:13,109 Dennis, you"ve been fostering for a couple of months. 52 00:02:13,133 --> 00:02:14,834 How do you have so many pictures? 53 00:02:14,858 --> 00:02:16,595 I just want to capture every moment. 54 00:02:16,619 --> 00:02:18,114 - Look at this. - Okay. 55 00:02:18,138 --> 00:02:19,598 It"s the first day Ben and I brought them home. 56 00:02:19,622 --> 00:02:21,013 - Very sweet. - Yeah. 57 00:02:21,037 --> 00:02:22,497 - First time in the living room. - Well... 58 00:02:22,521 --> 00:02:24,120 First time in the dining room. 59 00:02:24,144 --> 00:02:26,122 Oh. First time in the hallway. 60 00:02:26,146 --> 00:02:27,640 Okay, sweetheart. Get it together. 61 00:02:27,664 --> 00:02:29,608 - Parenting is not that great. - Sam. Dennis. 62 00:02:29,632 --> 00:02:31,161 Here are the binders you"ll need 63 00:02:31,185 --> 00:02:33,957 for the major presentation I"ve prepared for my father. 64 00:02:33,981 --> 00:02:36,132 Ooh, this is a chance for you to increase your value. 65 00:02:36,156 --> 00:02:37,995 - Ask for a binder. - Can I have a binder? 66 00:02:38,019 --> 00:02:40,170 Nell, oh, you surprised me. 67 00:02:40,194 --> 00:02:43,346 You"re always lurking about like a little church mouse. What do you need a binder for? 68 00:02:43,370 --> 00:02:46,832 I"d like to be in the meeting. I have a decade of journalistic experience. 69 00:02:46,856 --> 00:02:49,203 I-I think I could bring some value to the table. 70 00:02:50,791 --> 00:02:52,838 Nell, over the past year, 71 00:02:52,862 --> 00:02:57,532 I"ve come to know you as a friend to Sam and also an acquaintance/employee to me. 72 00:02:57,556 --> 00:02:59,638 So I don"t want you to take this the wrong way, 73 00:02:59,662 --> 00:03:02,813 but it"s just that my father needs to see the very best of the paper, 74 00:03:02,837 --> 00:03:04,021 and you are, um... 75 00:03:04,045 --> 00:03:05,333 The worst. 76 00:03:05,357 --> 00:03:09,026 That wasn"t very nice, Mason. 77 00:03:09,050 --> 00:03:11,201 Ah, what a scamp. Come on, A-team. Let"s go. 78 00:03:11,225 --> 00:03:13,883 - Mason got a binder? - I don"t know. I'm so sorry. 79 00:03:30,934 --> 00:03:32,774 Good morning, everyone. 80 00:03:32,798 --> 00:03:35,398 Great to see you again if we"ve met before. 81 00:03:35,422 --> 00:03:38,021 Wow, nice shirt. We"re gonna buy you a mirror. 82 00:03:38,045 --> 00:03:39,678 - I"ll remove it, sir. - Good call. 83 00:03:39,702 --> 00:03:41,093 It"s a pleasure to see you, Father. 84 00:03:41,117 --> 00:03:43,026 Alexis. You"re looking as stern 85 00:03:43,050 --> 00:03:45,718 as your grandmother more and more every day. 86 00:03:45,742 --> 00:03:47,054 And you look wealthy, Father. 87 00:03:49,781 --> 00:03:51,586 Mmm. 88 00:03:51,610 --> 00:03:52,898 I"m excited you're here 89 00:03:52,922 --> 00:03:54,348 to review the progress of the crown jewel 90 00:03:54,372 --> 00:03:56,246 of the Rhodes family corporate holdings. 91 00:03:56,270 --> 00:03:58,352 I have put together a thorough presentation 92 00:03:58,376 --> 00:04:01,596 with some of my top people and their giant binders. 93 00:04:01,620 --> 00:04:03,046 They"re... They're very heavy. 94 00:04:03,070 --> 00:04:05,359 No spoilers, but I"m also excited 95 00:04:05,383 --> 00:04:08,396 to tell you that circulation is up 3%. 96 00:04:08,420 --> 00:04:11,123 Ah, 3%, like the milk. 97 00:04:11,147 --> 00:04:14,115 Yes. 98 00:04:15,634 --> 00:04:17,543 Step away from my father"s array of special treats. 99 00:04:17,567 --> 00:04:19,787 Sorry, these scones are so dry. 100 00:04:19,811 --> 00:04:21,330 It"s like eating a bath bomb. 101 00:04:22,158 --> 00:04:24,240 And who is that with the crumbs? 102 00:04:24,264 --> 00:04:27,243 Oh, she"s just the obituary writer. She has no binder. 103 00:04:27,267 --> 00:04:28,968 It"s still in my throat. 104 00:04:28,992 --> 00:04:30,315 You know, actually, 105 00:04:30,339 --> 00:04:33,031 she is the one that I came here to see. 106 00:04:33,445 --> 00:04:34,285 Did he say me? 107 00:04:34,309 --> 00:04:36,079 You see, I"ve been reflecting 108 00:04:36,103 --> 00:04:38,288 on my very important life lately, 109 00:04:38,312 --> 00:04:40,083 and I think it"s time to consider 110 00:04:40,107 --> 00:04:41,843 what the world will read about me 111 00:04:41,867 --> 00:04:43,293 when I"m gone. 112 00:04:43,317 --> 00:04:45,468 Titan. Maverick. 113 00:04:45,492 --> 00:04:47,297 Titan of all mavericks. 114 00:04:47,321 --> 00:04:49,851 See, these are all words used to describe me. 115 00:04:49,875 --> 00:04:51,853 Of course. Accurate ones at that. 116 00:04:51,877 --> 00:04:53,441 Yep. You know what? Finish up 117 00:04:53,465 --> 00:04:55,201 whatever you"re doing with your mouth, 118 00:04:55,225 --> 00:04:56,824 and, uh, let"s get to work, huh? 119 00:04:56,848 --> 00:04:59,620 But Nell is one of our more insignificant workers. 120 00:04:59,644 --> 00:05:00,793 If you wanted to work with one of 121 00:05:00,817 --> 00:05:02,105 our more significant people, uh, 122 00:05:02,129 --> 00:05:03,348 me"s available. 123 00:05:03,372 --> 00:05:05,039 Ah, no need, darling. 124 00:05:05,063 --> 00:05:07,421 I"m gonna talk to Mel. 125 00:05:07,445 --> 00:05:09,481 - "I"ll just talk to Mel." - Mm-hmm. 126 00:05:10,482 --> 00:05:12,149 Oh. 127 00:05:12,173 --> 00:05:15,808 It is very nice to finally meet you, Mr. Rhodes. You have a lovely newspaper. 128 00:05:15,832 --> 00:05:17,948 Aw, well, it"s nice to meet you as well. 129 00:05:17,972 --> 00:05:19,605 And I haven"t read your writing yet, 130 00:05:19,629 --> 00:05:23,126 but judging from your hands, you"re a really hard worker. 131 00:05:23,150 --> 00:05:25,335 Thanks. I have seasonal eczema. 132 00:05:25,359 --> 00:05:27,061 Ah. 133 00:05:27,085 --> 00:05:29,374 So, let me ask you, how does this work? 134 00:05:29,398 --> 00:05:33,792 Do I, uh, dictate to you? Do I act out scenes? 135 00:05:33,816 --> 00:05:37,968 Oh, uh, typically, you know, I do some research, talk to loved ones. 136 00:05:37,992 --> 00:05:39,580 Could you get that for me? 137 00:05:44,413 --> 00:05:45,218 Whew. 138 00:05:45,242 --> 00:05:48,082 Okay. So, tell me what might be 139 00:05:48,106 --> 00:05:50,636 the first thing you want people to know about you when you"re gone. 140 00:05:50,660 --> 00:05:54,640 Oh, wow. I"m really not good off the t... top of my head. 141 00:05:54,664 --> 00:05:56,470 In 1987, 142 00:05:56,494 --> 00:06:01,406 I acquired two of the most dominant light bulb retail chains in America, 143 00:06:01,430 --> 00:06:04,340 The Light Bulb Plus and The Light Bulb Stop, 144 00:06:04,364 --> 00:06:08,999 and I merged them into Light Bulb Chalet. 145 00:06:09,023 --> 00:06:11,933 Okay. That"s pretty good. 146 00:06:11,957 --> 00:06:14,477 And it cut 2,000 jobs nationwide. 147 00:06:15,547 --> 00:06:17,929 I"m sure they all just went back to school. 148 00:06:21,657 --> 00:06:24,567 What"s that smell? 149 00:06:24,591 --> 00:06:26,879 Oh, I remember you. You"re Nell's adult roommate. 150 00:06:26,903 --> 00:06:28,674 You look even less rugged in the daytime. 151 00:06:28,698 --> 00:06:31,677 And you "re Nell"s unapproachable, controlling boss. 152 00:06:31,701 --> 00:06:33,955 Where"d you get your suit? Nancy Reagan"s grave? 153 00:06:33,979 --> 00:06:35,681 No, but it is from her collection. 154 00:06:35,705 --> 00:06:38,512 Has anyone ever told you you resemble a stalk of asparagus? 155 00:06:38,536 --> 00:06:40,755 You look like you"ve eaten all the lemons. 156 00:06:40,779 --> 00:06:43,033 You look like someone who can"t eat dairy and loves to tell everyone about it. 157 00:06:43,057 --> 00:06:44,863 You look like you want to talk to my manager. 158 00:06:44,887 --> 00:06:47,210 I "m waiting for my father. He"s here to spend the day with me. 159 00:06:47,234 --> 00:06:49,695 - Why are you here? - Nell"s leftovers. 160 00:06:49,719 --> 00:06:52,560 Ah. Her cubicle is, um... 161 00:06:52,584 --> 00:06:55,529 Oh, it"s somewhere over there. It"s the sticky one. 162 00:06:55,553 --> 00:06:58,221 Good luck saving the grass or whatever it is you care about. 163 00:06:58,245 --> 00:06:59,936 Good luck with the War on Drugs. 164 00:07:02,352 --> 00:07:05,470 All right. So, how"s it reading? Is it humming yet? 165 00:07:05,494 --> 00:07:07,886 Maybe not yet, but, you know, trust the process. 166 00:07:07,910 --> 00:07:10,716 "Even with my story about how I ended the minors" strike? 167 00:07:10,740 --> 00:07:11,993 - Mmm. - You understand 168 00:07:12,017 --> 00:07:14,651 when I say minors, I mean children. 169 00:07:14,675 --> 00:07:16,550 - I got that. - Okay. 170 00:07:16,574 --> 00:07:19,760 Um, but, as of now, it"s sounding a little less "celebration of life" 171 00:07:19,784 --> 00:07:24,454 and a little more like what a villain says to you as they lower you into a volcano. 172 00:07:24,478 --> 00:07:27,457 Well, see, that "s... that"s no good. Th-This is my legacy. 173 00:07:27,481 --> 00:07:30,460 This is how people are gonna remember me. 174 00:07:30,484 --> 00:07:34,143 So... So what do I do? Just... Just be honest with me, Mel. 175 00:07:35,144 --> 00:07:38,388 Okay. Y-You want me to be honest? 176 00:07:40,045 --> 00:07:41,322 My name is Nell. 177 00:07:41,806 --> 00:07:43,956 - Mel. - Nell. 178 00:07:43,980 --> 00:07:47,270 - Nell with... - Nell, Nell, Nell. 179 00:07:47,294 --> 00:07:49,341 - Yeah. - Oh. 180 00:07:49,365 --> 00:07:52,655 You know, this is either the first time that I "ve gotten someone"s name wrong 181 00:07:52,679 --> 00:07:55,475 or the first time that someone"s corrected me. 182 00:07:56,303 --> 00:07:58,039 All right. Tell me more. 183 00:07:58,063 --> 00:08:03,838 Well, I find that people connect most with the... the simpler things. 184 00:08:03,862 --> 00:08:05,150 Ah. 185 00:08:05,174 --> 00:08:06,634 You know, the struggles someone overcomes, 186 00:08:06,658 --> 00:08:09,223 um, the good they"ve done. 187 00:08:09,247 --> 00:08:10,535 Of course, the good... 188 00:08:10,559 --> 00:08:12,709 Well, that should be easy enough. 189 00:08:12,733 --> 00:08:16,392 - Okay. - How do we put some good in my obituary? 190 00:08:16,875 --> 00:08:19,371 By being good. 191 00:08:19,395 --> 00:08:21,304 - By being good. - Yeah. 192 00:08:21,328 --> 00:08:23,237 Of course. Do you know something? 193 00:08:23,261 --> 00:08:27,679 This is the most fascinating conversation that I"ve had in my entire life. 194 00:08:28,542 --> 00:08:30,313 - Wow. - I wanna keep talking. 195 00:08:30,337 --> 00:08:31,728 - Come on. - Oh. Okay. 196 00:08:31,752 --> 00:08:34,041 I"ll tell you... tell you what, "By being good." 197 00:08:34,065 --> 00:08:35,491 How do I not know that? 198 00:08:35,515 --> 00:08:37,320 Lexi "s dad thinks I"m fascinating. 199 00:08:37,344 --> 00:08:40,634 "Fascinating," he said. How"s that for increasing value? 200 00:08:40,658 --> 00:08:45,283 Your neighborhood is on the come-up. Get ready to pay $12 a latte, honey. 201 00:08:46,422 --> 00:08:47,527 Oh. 202 00:08:50,875 --> 00:08:52,197 Are you ready for lunch, Father? 203 00:08:52,221 --> 00:08:54,579 I am. I"m going with Nell. 204 00:08:54,603 --> 00:08:58,514 Oh, and that"s her name, everyone. So let"s stop saying it wrong. 205 00:08:58,538 --> 00:09:01,551 Of course, if she"ll have me, that is. 206 00:09:01,575 --> 00:09:05,900 You know what? Lunch sounds great to me, Mr. Rhodes. 207 00:09:05,924 --> 00:09:08,006 Okay. Your driver or mine? 208 00:09:08,030 --> 00:09:09,179 Uh, yours. 209 00:09:09,203 --> 00:09:11,102 Mine. 210 00:09:17,729 --> 00:09:21,561 Very well. Exactly how I planned and wanted things to happen. 211 00:09:24,149 --> 00:09:26,680 Why are you still here? Shouldn"t you be milking an almond? 212 00:09:26,704 --> 00:09:28,371 I couldn"t find Nell's desk. 213 00:09:28,395 --> 00:09:30,407 She"s having lunch with my father, which is fine. 214 00:09:30,431 --> 00:09:32,133 Doesn"t seem fine. 215 00:09:32,157 --> 00:09:34,757 It seems like you actually have some pretty serious daddy issues. 216 00:09:34,781 --> 00:09:38,139 What do you know? You look like a mop with student loan debt. 217 00:09:38,163 --> 00:09:40,728 You look like you just got fired from Sephora. 218 00:09:40,752 --> 00:09:43,065 Hmm. 219 00:09:56,665 --> 00:09:58,574 So, I"ve been thinking about this, 220 00:09:58,598 --> 00:10:00,990 and there are some things that you can do to be a better person 221 00:10:01,014 --> 00:10:03,475 and have an impressive obituary, 222 00:10:03,499 --> 00:10:05,995 for example, charity. 223 00:10:06,019 --> 00:10:07,790 Oh, yeah. 224 00:10:07,814 --> 00:10:10,724 You know, I"ve given a-a lot of money to charity over the years. 225 00:10:10,748 --> 00:10:14,900 And, uh, I even gave my entire Malibu estate to my ex-wife. 226 00:10:14,924 --> 00:10:16,350 Yeah, didn"t care for it. 227 00:10:16,374 --> 00:10:20,285 Well, m-maybe you"d enjoy, uh, giving to charity 228 00:10:20,309 --> 00:10:23,909 if you gave it to something you love, like, uh, n-name something you love. 229 00:10:23,933 --> 00:10:27,603 - Money. - You wanna donate your money to money? 230 00:10:27,627 --> 00:10:29,812 Yes. And, uh, how does one do that? 231 00:10:29,836 --> 00:10:33,263 That finger better be telling me how many bottles of wine you want in your order, 232 00:10:33,287 --> 00:10:36,301 - or you"re about to lose that hand. - I am so sorry, Cricket. 233 00:10:36,325 --> 00:10:38,327 - Hmm. - Mr. Rhodes is Lexi"s dad. 234 00:10:38,879 --> 00:10:40,374 - That tracks. - Ouch. 235 00:10:40,398 --> 00:10:43,273 Well, I"ve never had anyone apologize for me before. 236 00:10:43,297 --> 00:10:44,965 - But I love it. - Uh... 237 00:10:44,989 --> 00:10:46,518 Tell me what I did wrong. 238 00:10:46,542 --> 00:10:49,832 So, when your server approaches, you make eye contact, 239 00:10:49,856 --> 00:10:51,281 - greet them... - Okay. 240 00:10:51,305 --> 00:10:53,387 - Say something nice. Mm-hmm. - All righty. 241 00:10:53,411 --> 00:10:55,838 Hello, I"d like to buy you a plane. 242 00:10:55,862 --> 00:10:57,460 - Well, no, that "s too much. That"s... - No? 243 00:10:57,484 --> 00:10:58,530 - That was too far. - Okay. 244 00:10:58,554 --> 00:11:00,463 Maybe something more relatable. 245 00:11:00,487 --> 00:11:02,776 Got it. 246 00:11:02,800 --> 00:11:05,986 Yowza, you can do Shakespeare off that balcony. 247 00:11:06,010 --> 00:11:07,815 S-Sorry. 248 00:11:07,839 --> 00:11:10,335 Never... Never comment on a woman"s body. 249 00:11:10,359 --> 00:11:12,993 But body and plane are my two best moves. 250 00:11:13,017 --> 00:11:16,686 You have to make someone feel seen, you know, and appreciated. 251 00:11:16,710 --> 00:11:20,656 What am I supposed to do? Compliment her on her shoes? 252 00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:21,691 - Sure. - Yeah. 253 00:11:21,715 --> 00:11:23,924 Yeah, that seems safe. Give it a whirl. 254 00:11:25,443 --> 00:11:26,789 I like your shoes. 255 00:11:27,203 --> 00:11:28,353 Thank you. 256 00:11:28,377 --> 00:11:29,803 Look at that. 257 00:11:29,827 --> 00:11:32,391 - Really? It-It"s-It's that easy? - Really. 258 00:11:32,415 --> 00:11:35,601 Yeah. It might not be building a school for orphans, 259 00:11:35,625 --> 00:11:39,560 but you just made a normal human connection. 260 00:11:40,285 --> 00:11:41,677 Thank you, Nell. 261 00:11:41,701 --> 00:11:43,195 You"re welcome, Mr. Rhodes. 262 00:11:43,219 --> 00:11:45,853 Oh, congratulations, everybody. 263 00:11:45,877 --> 00:11:47,396 And you owe me a plane. 264 00:11:51,400 --> 00:11:53,033 Please tell me there"s more coffee. 265 00:11:53,057 --> 00:11:55,829 It ain"t fresh, but it does the trick, am I right? 266 00:11:55,853 --> 00:11:57,751 Amen to that, right? 267 00:11:59,511 --> 00:12:01,558 - Wait. Why are you here? - I"m kind of on a break. 268 00:12:01,582 --> 00:12:04,872 - You don"t work here. - Not on my break I don"t. 269 00:12:04,896 --> 00:12:08,634 Yeah, I"m not gonna move on from this. Why are you here? 270 00:12:08,658 --> 00:12:12,708 Uh, Sam, Edward is here today because he is my lawyer. 271 00:12:12,732 --> 00:12:14,192 But he"s an environmental lawyer. 272 00:12:14,216 --> 00:12:16,712 Exactly. I"m currently in litigation with a spruce. 273 00:12:16,736 --> 00:12:19,784 But he is done, and on his way out. 274 00:12:19,808 --> 00:12:21,544 Yeah. Are you okay? 275 00:12:21,568 --> 00:12:24,202 Are you sure today is the best day to start suing trees? 276 00:12:24,226 --> 00:12:28,413 Oh, it"s like they say, "There"s never a great time to sue a tree." 277 00:12:28,437 --> 00:12:29,759 I"m fine, Sam. 278 00:12:29,783 --> 00:12:31,036 Okay. 279 00:12:31,060 --> 00:12:33,211 Be sure to sign the card for Steve"s birthday. 280 00:12:33,235 --> 00:12:34,902 You don"t work here. 281 00:12:34,926 --> 00:12:36,455 Why are you still here? 282 00:12:36,479 --> 00:12:40,045 I came for a cup of coffee and to see if you wanted me to 283 00:12:40,069 --> 00:12:42,876 "hug you from behind and navigate the belly button." 284 00:12:42,900 --> 00:12:44,498 Are you referring to earlier in the hallway 285 00:12:44,522 --> 00:12:45,775 when I pinned you against the wall, 286 00:12:45,799 --> 00:12:47,639 kissed you hard and you kissed me back? 287 00:12:47,663 --> 00:12:50,055 It was nothing. Forget about it. I have. 288 00:12:50,079 --> 00:12:53,956 I know that laugh. I heard it once before as a child. 289 00:12:53,980 --> 00:12:55,705 I was roller-skating and fell. 290 00:12:59,468 --> 00:13:02,067 What are they laughing about? Is she even funny? 291 00:13:02,091 --> 00:13:05,646 Have you heard her breakfast puns? They are "egg-cellent." 292 00:13:07,200 --> 00:13:10,420 Well, I wanna thank you for a very enlightening day, Nell. 293 00:13:10,444 --> 00:13:12,353 Oh, thank you, Mr. Rhodes. 294 00:13:12,377 --> 00:13:17,807 Ah, Mr. Rhodes is my cat. I named him after me. Call me Duncan. 295 00:13:17,831 --> 00:13:21,915 Thank you, Duncan. I also had a really enlightening day. 296 00:13:21,939 --> 00:13:23,606 And me. 297 00:13:23,630 --> 00:13:26,851 You went from a teardown to a modern farmhouse in a good school district. 298 00:13:26,875 --> 00:13:31,465 You know, I don"t use the term "moxie" often because, uh, well, I don"t want to, 299 00:13:32,881 --> 00:13:34,341 but I do have to say I think you"ve got it. 300 00:13:34,365 --> 00:13:37,782 And I"m gonna be giving you a raise. 301 00:13:38,334 --> 00:13:40,105 - Really? - Oh, yeah. 302 00:13:40,129 --> 00:13:41,969 Thank you, Mr. Rhodes. 303 00:13:41,993 --> 00:13:46,042 Wow. I mean, thank you, Duncan. Duncster? 304 00:13:46,066 --> 00:13:47,941 - Too far. - Duncan. 305 00:13:47,965 --> 00:13:49,518 Alexis. 306 00:13:51,175 --> 00:13:52,635 Yes, Father, do-do you need me? 307 00:13:52,659 --> 00:13:54,395 - Ye... I sure do. - Oh. 308 00:13:54,419 --> 00:13:56,570 I-In the sense that I need your office. 309 00:13:56,594 --> 00:13:58,641 I just gave your Nell here a raise, 310 00:13:58,665 --> 00:14:02,645 and we"re gonna go up there and celebrate with Scotch by the fire. 311 00:14:02,669 --> 00:14:05,510 A midday libation. How lovely. 312 00:14:05,534 --> 00:14:08,996 - And I will see you up there in ten, huh? - Mm-hmm. 313 00:14:09,020 --> 00:14:11,309 All right, ding-dong. Get back in there. 314 00:14:11,333 --> 00:14:12,689 - Let"s do this. - Wow. 315 00:14:12,713 --> 00:14:14,381 Stop talking. 316 00:14:14,405 --> 00:14:16,141 You"re not gonna believe this. 317 00:14:16,165 --> 00:14:18,695 Mr. Rhodes is totally obsessed with me, and he values my opinion, 318 00:14:18,719 --> 00:14:20,249 and he just gave me a raise. 319 00:14:20,273 --> 00:14:22,423 What? Are you joking me right now? Oh, my gosh. 320 00:14:22,447 --> 00:14:24,356 We have to celebrate. You so deserve this. 321 00:14:24,380 --> 00:14:26,393 I smell a shopping trip to Neiman"s. 322 00:14:26,417 --> 00:14:29,672 Or maybe to Marshalls. We"re still in journalism, so... 323 00:14:29,696 --> 00:14:32,261 Either way, I am so proud of you. 324 00:14:32,285 --> 00:14:33,710 - Thank you. - Oh. 325 00:14:33,734 --> 00:14:36,506 - And now maybe that you have an in... - Uh-huh. 326 00:14:36,530 --> 00:14:40,510 You could use that to get him to give Lexi some attention, you know? 327 00:14:40,534 --> 00:14:43,859 Like, deep down, I think she just really wants some attention from her dad. 328 00:14:43,883 --> 00:14:47,897 Mmm, pass. No, she"s been a total jerk to me. No. 329 00:14:47,921 --> 00:14:49,899 - I"m gonna take that as a "maybe." Okay? - Huh? 330 00:14:49,923 --> 00:14:52,177 So you can think about it because I"m genuinely worried about her. 331 00:14:52,201 --> 00:14:55,756 Every time I see her, she looks like she"s falling apart more and more. 332 00:14:56,826 --> 00:14:57,862 Hello. 333 00:14:58,759 --> 00:15:00,140 She looks all right to me. 334 00:15:00,934 --> 00:15:03,695 Mm-hmm. Oh. 335 00:15:04,662 --> 00:15:06,467 Mmm. 336 00:15:06,491 --> 00:15:10,195 That tastes like an expensive shoe. 337 00:15:10,219 --> 00:15:15,638 You know, my doctor says this is bad for my liver, so I had him killed. 338 00:15:17,088 --> 00:15:20,723 Ah, yes. You "re so bad, it"s illegal. 339 00:15:20,747 --> 00:15:23,139 Oh, it"s so weird relaxing in here. 340 00:15:23,163 --> 00:15:27,212 I"m usually getting yelled at by Lexi or insulted by Lexi 341 00:15:27,236 --> 00:15:29,387 or just having insults yelled at me by Lexi. 342 00:15:29,411 --> 00:15:32,390 Yeah. When you"re a Rhodes, you have a lot to live up to. 343 00:15:32,414 --> 00:15:33,794 Yeah, I bet. 344 00:15:40,215 --> 00:15:42,331 You know, Duncan, I... 345 00:15:42,355 --> 00:15:45,437 I feel kind of bad for Lexi. 346 00:15:45,461 --> 00:15:48,820 I think it"s kind of driving her crazy that you"re ignoring her for someone else. 347 00:15:48,844 --> 00:15:51,857 - Oh, it always does. Cheers. - Cheers. 348 00:15:51,881 --> 00:15:55,931 Wait. No cheers. What do you... What do you mean it always does? 349 00:15:55,955 --> 00:15:57,484 Well, that"s how I motivate her. 350 00:15:57,508 --> 00:15:59,693 You see, whenever I think she"s slacking, 351 00:15:59,717 --> 00:16:04,491 like when she"s pleased about a measly 3% increase in circulation, 352 00:16:04,515 --> 00:16:07,943 I find someone who I know gets under her skin, 353 00:16:07,967 --> 00:16:10,324 and I shower them with praise and attention. 354 00:16:10,348 --> 00:16:14,939 That just drives her to work harder to win my affection. 355 00:16:15,388 --> 00:16:17,262 Are you serious? 356 00:16:17,286 --> 00:16:19,851 - That"s kind of terrible. - And effective. 357 00:16:19,875 --> 00:16:22,958 One time, when she was under performing in boarding school, 358 00:16:22,982 --> 00:16:28,101 I befriended her roommate, Sarah. Spent Thanksgiving with her. 359 00:16:28,125 --> 00:16:32,105 God, that kid was so boring. Really into maps. 360 00:16:32,129 --> 00:16:36,695 Anyway, Lexi that year graduated at the top of her class. 361 00:16:36,719 --> 00:16:39,526 So y-you were just using me to manipulate your daughter? 362 00:16:39,550 --> 00:16:41,355 Well, I knew you were perfect 363 00:16:41,379 --> 00:16:46,936 when I saw how nauseated she looked watching you choke down that scone. 364 00:16:48,800 --> 00:16:50,630 I feel nauseous. 365 00:16:57,602 --> 00:17:03,022 Can"t believe I was some pawn in Duncan"s weird game. 366 00:17:03,953 --> 00:17:06,001 I obviously can"t take that raise. 367 00:17:06,025 --> 00:17:09,028 I"m always gonna be a condo by the airport. 368 00:17:11,927 --> 00:17:14,837 You know that $10 million listing I had? 369 00:17:14,861 --> 00:17:18,151 It had ocean views, wine cellar, infinity pool. 370 00:17:18,175 --> 00:17:21,223 I get it, Teddy Thompson. I get it. 371 00:17:21,247 --> 00:17:23,570 But it also had termites, 372 00:17:23,594 --> 00:17:27,194 a cracked chimney and a crumbling foundation. 373 00:17:27,218 --> 00:17:31,578 When I saw that inspection report, it felt like getting hit by a bus 374 00:17:31,602 --> 00:17:34,950 because I was reading it on my phone when I got hit by a bus. 375 00:17:35,606 --> 00:17:37,204 - Ouch. - The point is, 376 00:17:37,228 --> 00:17:39,620 it doesn"t matter how fancy you are on the outside 377 00:17:39,644 --> 00:17:41,681 when your foundation is crumbling. 378 00:17:43,786 --> 00:17:46,065 I can tell you"ve got a good foundation. 379 00:17:47,238 --> 00:17:48,526 - Do I though? - Yes. 380 00:17:48,550 --> 00:17:51,632 I knew I was taking away Lexi"s dad's attention. 381 00:17:51,656 --> 00:17:55,119 I didn"t even care. I was so-so focused on feeling valued. 382 00:17:55,143 --> 00:17:58,708 In your defense, you were trying to teach him how to be a better person. 383 00:17:58,732 --> 00:18:00,009 Which I failed at too. 384 00:18:01,114 --> 00:18:03,575 I didn"t get through to him at all. 385 00:18:03,599 --> 00:18:05,774 He didn"t even care about his obituary. 386 00:18:07,603 --> 00:18:09,674 Maybe because he hasn"t read it yet. 387 00:18:11,642 --> 00:18:14,093 Or he can"t read. One of the two. 388 00:18:15,818 --> 00:18:17,141 Duncan Wilson Rhodes 389 00:18:17,165 --> 00:18:18,556 was a titan of the publishing, vitamin 390 00:18:18,580 --> 00:18:20,316 and light bulb industries. 391 00:18:20,340 --> 00:18:23,078 He was a wildly influential businessman who lived a successful life 392 00:18:23,102 --> 00:18:25,770 by any metric except for one, 393 00:18:25,794 --> 00:18:27,594 his relationships with the people in his life. 394 00:18:28,935 --> 00:18:30,119 "♪ Well, I" ve been out walking ♪ 395 00:18:30,143 --> 00:18:32,225 He is survived by Alexis, 396 00:18:32,249 --> 00:18:35,780 a former Olympian and current editor of the SoCal Independent. 397 00:18:35,804 --> 00:18:39,335 "Alexis particularly strived to attain both her father"s business acumen 398 00:18:39,359 --> 00:18:41,165 and his affection. 399 00:18:41,189 --> 00:18:44,616 While she succeeded in the former, she never got the latter 400 00:18:44,640 --> 00:18:47,792 "because Duncan" s passing came before he could realize 401 00:18:47,816 --> 00:18:52,107 that it"s not the business ledgers that really tally the worth of your life. 402 00:18:52,131 --> 00:18:53,832 - There you go. - It"s the value 403 00:18:53,856 --> 00:18:56,180 of the relationships you have with others... 404 00:18:56,204 --> 00:19:01,254 This one goes first because I took it five minutes before this one. 405 00:19:01,278 --> 00:19:05,844 And the impact that we have on those people. 406 00:19:05,868 --> 00:19:08,537 Perhaps if Duncan had a chance to do it all again, 407 00:19:08,561 --> 00:19:11,357 he would have diversified his emotional holdings. 408 00:19:21,677 --> 00:19:23,955 - Hello, Father. - Alexis. 409 00:19:24,853 --> 00:19:26,624 I want to apologize for Nell"s obituary. 410 00:19:26,648 --> 00:19:29,523 I would cut her pay, but she already makes below a living wage. 411 00:19:29,547 --> 00:19:30,904 Well, see what you can do. 412 00:19:30,928 --> 00:19:32,630 Also, I"ve been reviewing our financials, 413 00:19:32,654 --> 00:19:35,840 and I think I can do much better than the 3% circulation increase. 414 00:19:35,864 --> 00:19:37,807 I have some exciting ideas I could email to you. 415 00:19:37,831 --> 00:19:41,697 Well, I knew you"d find a way. Schedule some time with my secretary. 416 00:19:42,767 --> 00:19:44,044 Alexis. 417 00:19:44,735 --> 00:19:45,977 Yes. 418 00:19:47,979 --> 00:19:49,705 I like your shoes. 419 00:19:55,263 --> 00:19:57,196 - My shoes? - Yeah. 420 00:20:00,544 --> 00:20:01,959 Th-Thank you. 421 00:20:03,167 --> 00:20:06,181 I got them from a cobbler near the palace in Vienna. 422 00:20:06,205 --> 00:20:07,240 Mm-hmm. 423 00:20:13,039 --> 00:20:14,844 That was a wonderful trip. 424 00:20:14,868 --> 00:20:16,260 Oh, you remember that, huh? 425 00:20:16,284 --> 00:20:18,193 I do. Never had sauerkraut before. 426 00:20:18,217 --> 00:20:20,333 - Or the bratwurst, right? - Yes. 427 00:20:20,357 --> 00:20:21,403 You did that. 428 00:20:21,427 --> 00:20:22,921 We did that. 429 00:20:22,945 --> 00:20:26,131 Thank you for reminding me of my value. 430 00:20:26,155 --> 00:20:28,030 Well, as Teddy Thompson always says, 431 00:20:28,054 --> 00:20:30,895 - "Don"t just dream it. Own it." - "Own it." 432 00:20:30,919 --> 00:20:35,095 Now can you please finish my obituary? This is the longest showing of my life. 433 00:20:41,412 --> 00:20:43,287 What is going on here? 434 00:20:43,311 --> 00:20:45,599 Oh, this? Just some fond memories. 435 00:20:45,623 --> 00:20:49,638 No, these are... these are things that Lexi took off everyone else"s desk. 436 00:20:49,662 --> 00:20:51,640 Yeah. This is Jeff"s family. 437 00:20:51,664 --> 00:20:53,228 They"re my family now. 438 00:20:53,252 --> 00:20:54,712 And this is my turkey drawing 439 00:20:54,736 --> 00:20:57,577 made with Dominic"s son's tiny little handprint. 440 00:20:57,601 --> 00:20:59,613 I love the decor. 441 00:20:59,637 --> 00:21:03,376 And you were a Navy SEAL. Thank you for your service. 442 00:21:03,400 --> 00:21:04,791 You got it. 443 00:21:04,815 --> 00:21:06,448 These items belong to other people 444 00:21:06,472 --> 00:21:07,759 in the office. She stole them. 445 00:21:07,783 --> 00:21:09,623 Oh, do-gooder over here. 446 00:21:09,647 --> 00:21:11,142 Every office has one. 447 00:21:11,166 --> 00:21:13,282 Try sitting across from her every day. 448 00:21:13,306 --> 00:21:15,250 - Blah, blah, blah. Nobody"s there. - You are funny. 449 00:21:15,274 --> 00:21:17,079 I know, right? 450 00:21:17,103 --> 00:21:19,737 Oh. I"d like to take you to lunch. What"s your name? 451 00:21:19,761 --> 00:21:22,488 - Tina. - Wonderful. Come on, Nina. 452 00:21:23,143 --> 00:21:24,559 Uh... It doesn"t even matter. 36345

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