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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:09,801 --> 00:00:11,094 [knocks at door] YOU WANTED TO SEE ME? 2 00:00:11,136 --> 00:00:15,682 - YEAH. HAVE A SEAT. - IS IT SERIOUS? 3 00:00:15,724 --> 00:00:17,475 WOW. [nervous laughter] 4 00:00:17,517 --> 00:00:19,144 ANDY'S A WITTLE SCAWED. 5 00:00:19,185 --> 00:00:22,397 OKAY, RIGHT THERE. RIGHT THERE IS THE PROBLEM. 6 00:00:22,439 --> 00:00:25,358 THERE HAVE BEEN REPORTS AROUND THE OFFICE 7 00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:29,112 THAT YOU HAVE BEEN TALKING BABY TALK. 8 00:00:29,154 --> 00:00:30,572 WHY WOULD PEOPLE SAY THAT? 9 00:00:30,613 --> 00:00:33,992 WELL, I HAVE IT ON GOOD AUTHORITY 10 00:00:34,034 --> 00:00:35,827 THAT YOU SAID THE FOLLOWING. 11 00:00:35,869 --> 00:00:37,704 CAN YOU READ THAT BACK TO ME? 12 00:00:37,746 --> 00:00:40,290 - "ANDY HAVE A BOO-BOO TUMMY." - MM-HMM. 13 00:00:40,331 --> 00:00:42,208 WOULD YOU RATHER ME SAY 14 00:00:42,250 --> 00:00:46,046 "HEY, GUYS, MY IRRITABLE BOWEL SYNDROME IS FLARING UP"? 15 00:00:46,087 --> 00:00:47,213 OKAY. 16 00:00:47,255 --> 00:00:48,840 "CRAZY DIARRHEA HAPPENING RIGHT NOW." 17 00:00:48,882 --> 00:00:50,508 'CAUSE THINGS CAN GET REAL ADULT, REAL FAST. 18 00:00:50,550 --> 00:00:53,136 YOU ARE ALSO ON RECORD AS SAYING "WITTLE-ITTLE," 19 00:00:53,178 --> 00:00:54,929 "FOOTY-WUTTIES," "NUM NUMS," 20 00:00:54,971 --> 00:00:57,515 "JAMMIES," "MAKE BOOM-BOOM," "WIDICUWOUS," 21 00:00:57,557 --> 00:00:59,559 AND "WODE IWAND." 22 00:00:59,601 --> 00:01:01,519 BERNARDS ARE NOT ALLOWED TO TALK LIKE BABIES, 23 00:01:01,561 --> 00:01:03,021 EVEN WHEN WE'RE BABIES. 24 00:01:03,063 --> 00:01:05,523 SO NATURALLY, COLLEGE, MY FIRST TIME AWAY FROM HOME, 25 00:01:05,565 --> 00:01:06,858 I WENT NUTS. 26 00:01:06,900 --> 00:01:09,819 IT WAS ALL, "OOH, ANDY WEE-WEE IN CWIBBY," 27 00:01:09,861 --> 00:01:13,907 AND, "ANDY WANT MILKY FROM BOOBY." 28 00:01:13,948 --> 00:01:16,951 BUT AFTER ALL MY ROOMMATES TRANSFERRED, 29 00:01:16,993 --> 00:01:18,912 I REINED IT IN. 30 00:01:18,953 --> 00:01:20,789 SOMETIMES I CAN'T HELP MYSELF. 31 00:01:20,830 --> 00:01:23,041 DO I SOMETIMES REPLACE Rs WITH Ws? 32 00:01:23,083 --> 00:01:25,168 DO I SOMETIMES REPEAT A WORD TO GET MY POINT ACROSS? 33 00:01:25,210 --> 00:01:28,713 WELL, IF I DO, ANDY'S SOWWY. 34 00:01:28,755 --> 00:01:29,923 I GET IT, ANDY, ALL RIGHT? 35 00:01:29,964 --> 00:01:32,050 I GET THAT BEING AN ADULT IS TOUGH. 36 00:01:32,092 --> 00:01:33,468 YOU HAVE TO DRESS YOURSELF. 37 00:01:33,510 --> 00:01:34,844 YOU HAVE TO FEED YOURSELF. 38 00:01:34,886 --> 00:01:36,054 WHEN YOU HAVE TO POO, 39 00:01:36,096 --> 00:01:37,597 YOU NEED TO WALK TO A SPECIAL ROOM. 40 00:01:37,639 --> 00:01:38,765 BUT YOU CAN'T DO IT HERE. 41 00:01:38,807 --> 00:01:41,893 YOU CAN'T BE A BABY IN THE OFFICE. 42 00:01:41,935 --> 00:01:44,145 IT MAKES ME LOOK LIKE I HIRE BABIES. 43 00:01:44,187 --> 00:01:45,563 WELL, IF WE'RE COMPLAINING, 44 00:01:45,605 --> 00:01:47,607 A LOT OF PEOPLE THINK YOUR ELVIS VOICE IS ANNOYING. 45 00:01:47,649 --> 00:01:49,943 - OKAY, WHO SAID THAT? - I DON'T--JUST PEOPLE. 46 00:01:49,984 --> 00:01:53,238 FOR THE RECORD, I THINK IT'S PRETTY FANTASTIC. 47 00:01:53,279 --> 00:01:55,699 [as Elvis] WELL, THANK YOU. THANK YOU A LOT. 48 00:01:55,740 --> 00:01:57,909 AND FOR WHAT IT'S WORTH, I THINK YOUR BABY VOICE IS TOPS. 49 00:01:57,951 --> 00:02:00,245 TANK YOU, MR. ELWIS. 50 00:02:00,286 --> 00:02:02,914 [as Elvis] YOU'RE WELCOME, BABY. 51 00:02:02,956 --> 00:02:05,667 [cheerful music] 52 00:02:05,709 --> 00:02:13,842 ♪ ♪ 53 00:02:25,186 --> 00:02:28,189 [slams door] DR. TUNA, MD, I HAVE SOME TERRIBLE NEWS. 54 00:02:28,231 --> 00:02:29,941 WAIT, ARE YOU THE PATIENT OR THE DOCTOR? 55 00:02:29,983 --> 00:02:31,568 THE ENTIRE OFFICE HAS COME DOWN 56 00:02:31,609 --> 00:02:34,404 WITH A PERNICIOUS CASE OF THE MONDAYS. 57 00:02:34,446 --> 00:02:36,573 WOW. WHAT DO YOU PUT OUR CHANCES AT? 58 00:02:36,614 --> 00:02:38,116 0%. 59 00:02:38,158 --> 00:02:40,827 UNLESS WE PERFORM AN IMMEDIATE EMERGENCY 60 00:02:40,869 --> 00:02:42,328 MORALE TRANSPLANT, STAT! 61 00:02:42,370 --> 00:02:45,123 - MM. SOUNDS RISKY. - DON'T WORRY. 62 00:02:45,165 --> 00:02:49,544 THERE IS A SUREFIRE CURE. EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH. 63 00:02:49,586 --> 00:02:51,504 EVERY AWESOME PLACE I'VE WORKED HAD ONE. 64 00:02:51,546 --> 00:02:54,966 BEAR STEARNS. LEHMAN BROTHERS. AIG. 65 00:02:55,008 --> 00:02:57,093 MY SUMMER AT ENRON. 66 00:02:57,135 --> 00:02:58,511 WOW, THAT'S NOT SUCH A BAD IDEA. 67 00:02:58,553 --> 00:03:00,472 - GREAT! - ANYTHING ELSE? 68 00:03:00,513 --> 00:03:03,058 NOPE. 69 00:03:03,099 --> 00:03:04,267 [door slams shut] 70 00:03:04,309 --> 00:03:06,019 FRANKIE'S DIRTY JOKE OF THE DAY? 71 00:03:06,061 --> 00:03:08,146 - THERE'S A BUNCH OF THOSE. - KEEP. 72 00:03:08,188 --> 00:03:10,607 THERE'S A BUNCH OF SENT EMAILS THAT JUST SAY "DELIVERED." 73 00:03:10,648 --> 00:03:11,983 SHOULD I DELETE ALL THOSE? 74 00:03:12,025 --> 00:03:14,069 I WANT TO KEEP THOSE SO I CAN SEE WHAT I SENT. 75 00:03:14,110 --> 00:03:15,820 THAT'S WHY YOU HAVE A "SENT MAIL" FOLDER. 76 00:03:15,862 --> 00:03:17,155 KEEP. 77 00:03:17,197 --> 00:03:19,783 THERE'S ABOUT 30 NEWS ALERTS FOR "NIP SLIP." 78 00:03:19,824 --> 00:03:21,659 - FOR WHAT? - "NIP SLIP." 79 00:03:21,701 --> 00:03:23,912 OH, OKAY. I DON'T KNOW HOW THOSE GET ON THERE. 80 00:03:23,953 --> 00:03:25,789 - WELL... - MUST BE HACKERS. 81 00:03:25,830 --> 00:03:27,916 OOH, I CAN UNSUBSCRIBE YOU. 82 00:03:27,957 --> 00:03:29,668 NO, THAT'S OKAY. I'LL DO IT LATER. 83 00:03:29,709 --> 00:03:31,419 [knocks on door] HEY. 84 00:03:31,461 --> 00:03:32,504 WHAT'S UP? 85 00:03:32,545 --> 00:03:33,505 WHAT IF I TOLD YOU 86 00:03:33,546 --> 00:03:35,924 I HAD DONE THE WORST THING EVER, 87 00:03:35,965 --> 00:03:37,384 WOULD YOU STILL WANT TO BE MY FRIEND? 88 00:03:37,425 --> 00:03:39,302 - DID YOU MURDER SOMEONE? - WORSE THAN MURDER. 89 00:03:39,344 --> 00:03:44,641 - OH, GOD. - LURK MUCH? 90 00:03:44,683 --> 00:03:48,603 I MISS PAM. 91 00:03:48,645 --> 00:03:49,771 I THINK SHE'S OKAY. 92 00:03:49,813 --> 00:03:52,524 IS THAT WHAT WE'RE GOING FOR NOW? "OKAY"? 93 00:03:52,565 --> 00:03:54,484 WE USED TO GO FOR "PRETTY GOOD." 94 00:03:54,526 --> 00:03:55,568 OR ACCEPTABLE. 95 00:03:55,610 --> 00:03:56,528 YOU WANT TO TELL ME WHAT'S GOING ON? 96 00:03:56,569 --> 00:03:58,071 I CAN'T. 97 00:03:58,113 --> 00:04:01,116 I CAN'T TELL YOU, BUT JUST UINDERSTAND 98 00:04:01,157 --> 00:04:03,868 THAT IT IS WORSE THAN YOU CAN POSSIBLY IMAGINE. 99 00:04:03,910 --> 00:04:05,203 LEAVE IT AT THAT. 100 00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:06,871 GREAT. HEY, HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT STARTING 101 00:04:06,913 --> 00:04:08,540 AN EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH PROGRAM? 102 00:04:08,581 --> 00:04:10,083 YEAH. YOU KNOW WHAT, 103 00:04:10,125 --> 00:04:11,668 THAT ACTUALLY MIGHT MAKE ME FEEL BETTER. 104 00:04:11,710 --> 00:04:13,169 I'M NOT IN THIS FOR THE TROPHIES, BUT-- 105 00:04:13,211 --> 00:04:14,587 YOU'RE NOT IN IT AT ALL 106 00:04:14,629 --> 00:04:16,131 'CAUSE YOU CAN'T BE EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH, 107 00:04:16,172 --> 00:04:17,382 YOU'RE A MANAGER. 108 00:04:17,424 --> 00:04:18,550 WELL, TECHNICALLY, I AM A CO-MANAGER. 109 00:04:18,591 --> 00:04:20,135 AND I BARELY HAVE ANY RESPONSIBILITIES. 110 00:04:20,176 --> 00:04:21,886 BUT I WORK HARD, I LOVE THIS COMPANY, 111 00:04:21,928 --> 00:04:23,304 AND FOR THOSE REASONS, 112 00:04:23,346 --> 00:04:25,056 I THINK I WOULD MAKE A GOOD EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH. 113 00:04:25,098 --> 00:04:26,057 IT WOULD LOOK BAD. SORRY. 114 00:04:26,099 --> 00:04:27,017 IT WOULD LOOK GOOD 115 00:04:27,058 --> 00:04:28,435 ON MY MANTLE. 116 00:04:28,476 --> 00:04:30,520 * JIM'S TALKING TO MICHAEL RIGHT NOW ♪ 117 00:04:30,562 --> 00:04:33,023 THEY TOTALLY WENT FOR OUR IDEA. 118 00:04:33,064 --> 00:04:35,483 YEAH! YOUR IDEA. 119 00:04:35,525 --> 00:04:37,027 MY IDEA. 120 00:04:37,068 --> 00:04:38,611 I JUST NEED ANDY TO THINK IT'S HIS IDEA 121 00:04:38,653 --> 00:04:42,073 SO IT WON'T GET TRACED BACK TO ME. 122 00:04:42,115 --> 00:04:44,200 IN APPROXIMATELY SIX HOURS, 123 00:04:44,242 --> 00:04:46,995 JIM WILL GET A PHONE CALL FROM DAVID WALLACE. 124 00:04:47,037 --> 00:04:48,455 HE WILL BE FIRED. 125 00:04:48,496 --> 00:04:49,789 WELL, I MEAN, IT WAS OUR IDEA. 126 00:04:49,831 --> 00:04:50,999 - NO. - 'CAUSE YOU WERE LIKE, 127 00:04:51,041 --> 00:04:52,083 "WE SHOULD DO AN EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH," 128 00:04:52,125 --> 00:04:53,251 AND I WAS LIKE, "GENIUS." 129 00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:54,586 - YOU SAID THAT. - AND THEN YOU WERE LIKE, 130 00:04:54,627 --> 00:04:56,129 "GOT TALK TO JIM ABOUT IT," AND I WAS LIKE, 131 00:04:56,171 --> 00:04:57,422 "I'M ON IT." 132 00:04:57,464 --> 00:04:58,757 NO, I THINK YOU PRETTY MUCH CAME UP 133 00:04:58,798 --> 00:05:00,633 WITH THE WHOLE IDEA YOURSELF FROM TOP TO BOTTOM. 134 00:05:00,675 --> 00:05:01,843 AND YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE? 135 00:05:01,885 --> 00:05:03,345 YOU'RE A SHOO-IN TO WIN IT. 136 00:05:03,386 --> 00:05:05,805 AND I THINK THAT MISS ERIN 137 00:05:05,847 --> 00:05:09,559 WILL BE MIGHTILY IMPRESSED WHEN YOU ARE CROWNED 138 00:05:09,601 --> 00:05:11,728 EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH. 139 00:05:11,770 --> 00:05:13,146 REALLY? 140 00:05:13,188 --> 00:05:15,357 WAS JESSICA SIMPSON IMPRESSED WITH DANE COOK 141 00:05:15,398 --> 00:05:18,818 IN THE MOTION PICTURE "EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH"? 142 00:05:18,860 --> 00:05:19,944 I DON'T KNOW. I DIDN'T SEE IT. 143 00:05:19,986 --> 00:05:21,321 WAS SHE? 144 00:05:21,363 --> 00:05:23,114 I DIDN'T SEE IT EITHER, BUT ONE WAS TO ASSUME. 145 00:05:23,156 --> 00:05:24,449 - UH-HUH. - OH, YEAH, I GUESS SO. 146 00:05:24,491 --> 00:05:25,617 OKAY? HUH? 147 00:05:25,658 --> 00:05:27,535 both: OH! 148 00:05:27,577 --> 00:05:30,955 HEY, PAM, DO YOU HAVE A SEC TO CHECK OVER THIS ITINERARY? 149 00:05:30,997 --> 00:05:32,874 I LOVE HAVING PAM AROUND. 150 00:05:32,916 --> 00:05:34,918 I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'D DO WITHOUT HER. 151 00:05:34,959 --> 00:05:37,212 [sighs] SURE. 152 00:05:37,253 --> 00:05:39,631 WHENEVER ERIN SHOWS ME HER WORK, I JUST SAY, 153 00:05:39,673 --> 00:05:40,965 "LOOKS GREAT." 154 00:05:41,007 --> 00:05:42,634 LOOKS GREAT. 155 00:05:42,676 --> 00:05:44,094 LOOKS GREAT. 156 00:05:44,135 --> 00:05:46,888 LOOKS GREAT. 157 00:05:46,930 --> 00:05:49,349 THAT USUALLY DOES THE TRICK. 158 00:05:50,642 --> 00:05:51,643 LOOKS GREAT. 159 00:05:51,685 --> 00:05:53,478 OH, DID YOU REALLY LOOK IT OVER? 160 00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:57,399 - FELT LIKE MAYBE YOU DIDN'T. - OKAY. 161 00:05:57,440 --> 00:06:00,610 THE MICHAEL SCOTT FOUNDATION IS STILL IN EXISTENCE. 162 00:06:00,652 --> 00:06:01,778 THERE YOU ARE. 163 00:06:01,820 --> 00:06:03,655 I DON'T THINK WE HAVE FINISHED WITH MY INBOX. 164 00:06:03,697 --> 00:06:05,240 WHAT'S "SCOTT'S TOTS"? 165 00:06:05,281 --> 00:06:07,200 THANK YOU, ERIN. 166 00:06:07,242 --> 00:06:09,160 DID YOU ALSO TELL PEOPLE I HAD TO GO HOME LAST WEEK 167 00:06:09,202 --> 00:06:11,579 TO CHANGE MY PANTS FROM LAUGHING TOO HARD 168 00:06:11,621 --> 00:06:12,539 FROM A JOKE I TOLD? 169 00:06:12,580 --> 00:06:13,623 NO. 170 00:06:13,665 --> 00:06:15,750 GOOD, BECAUSE THAT DIDN'T HAPPEN. 171 00:06:15,792 --> 00:06:19,129 THE JOKE HAPPENED, BUT I DID NOT WET MY PANTS. 172 00:06:19,170 --> 00:06:20,964 I HAD TO GO HOME BECAUSE OF MIGRAINES. 173 00:06:21,006 --> 00:06:25,635 SCOTT'S TOTS IS A PROGRAM I STARTED 174 00:06:25,677 --> 00:06:28,555 AFTER I MET AN AMAZING GROUP OF THIRD GRADERS 175 00:06:28,596 --> 00:06:31,808 ABOUT TEN YEARS AGO AT CAREER DAY AT THEIR SCHOOL. 176 00:06:31,850 --> 00:06:36,646 [laughing] 177 00:06:36,688 --> 00:06:39,399 HAS IT REALLY BEEN TEN YEARS? 178 00:06:39,441 --> 00:06:42,652 "LOCAL BUSINESSMAN PLEDGES COLLEGE TUITION 179 00:06:42,694 --> 00:06:44,070 TO THIRD GRADERS." 180 00:06:44,112 --> 00:06:48,700 [laughs] 181 00:06:48,742 --> 00:06:51,161 MICHAEL, WHY DID YOU PROMISE THAT? 182 00:06:51,202 --> 00:06:52,537 TO CHANGE LIVES. 183 00:06:52,579 --> 00:06:55,498 NO, MICHAEL, WHY WOULD YOU PROMISE THAT? 184 00:06:55,540 --> 00:06:57,792 YEAH, OKAY, I-- CALL THE SCHOOL. 185 00:06:57,834 --> 00:06:59,711 CANCEL. I CAN'T GO THROUGH WITH THIS. 186 00:06:59,753 --> 00:07:01,379 WE'VE ALREADY RESCHEDULED SEVEN TIMES. 187 00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:05,342 MICHAEL, THIS IS A TERRIBLE, TERRIBLE THING YOU'VE DONE. 188 00:07:05,383 --> 00:07:07,093 - WELL... - IT'S TERRIBLE. 189 00:07:07,135 --> 00:07:09,721 - NO. - JUST TERRIBLE. 190 00:07:09,763 --> 00:07:12,682 AND THE LONGER YOU PUT IT OFF, THE WORSE IT'S GONNA GET. 191 00:07:12,724 --> 00:07:15,435 I JUST--I FELL IN LOVE WITH THESE KIDS. 192 00:07:15,477 --> 00:07:18,188 AND I DIDN'T WANT TO SEE THEM FALL VICTIM TO THE SYSTEM. 193 00:07:18,229 --> 00:07:19,397 SO I MADE THEM A PROMISE. 194 00:07:19,439 --> 00:07:21,066 I TOLD THEM THAT IF THEY GRADUATED 195 00:07:21,107 --> 00:07:22,817 FROM HIGH SCHOOL, 196 00:07:22,859 --> 00:07:25,570 I WOULD PAY FOR THEIR COLLEGE EDUCATION. 197 00:07:25,612 --> 00:07:27,781 I'VE MADE SOME EMPTY PROMISES IN MY LIFE, 198 00:07:27,822 --> 00:07:31,743 BUT HANDS DOWN, THAT WAS THE MOST GENEROUS. 199 00:07:31,785 --> 00:07:34,662 JUST TELL ME IT IS GOING TO BE OKAY, ALL RIGHT? 200 00:07:34,704 --> 00:07:36,790 - NO! - I'M NOT A BAD NEWS PERSON. 201 00:07:36,831 --> 00:07:38,458 I BRING GOOD NEWS. 202 00:07:38,500 --> 00:07:40,543 LIKE WHEN I PROMISED THOSE KIDS I'D PAY FOR COLLEGE. 203 00:07:40,585 --> 00:07:42,712 - [laughing] - OKAY. 204 00:07:42,754 --> 00:07:45,757 - ALL RIGHT. - YOU HAVE TO TELL THEM. 205 00:07:45,799 --> 00:07:47,342 WOULD YOU COME WITH ME? 206 00:07:47,384 --> 00:07:51,429 YOU KNOW, LIKE OLD TIMES INSTEAD OF... 207 00:07:51,471 --> 00:07:53,431 I CAN PRINT OUT A NEW ITINERARY 208 00:07:53,473 --> 00:07:55,100 WITH PAM'S NAME ON IT. 209 00:07:55,141 --> 00:07:57,477 IT'S FINE. ERIN, YOU'RE GOING TO GO. 210 00:07:57,519 --> 00:07:59,813 AND YOU'RE GOING TO MAKE SURE MICHAEL TELLS THE TRUTH. 211 00:07:59,854 --> 00:08:02,107 AGH, GOD, YOU KNOW WHAT, COULD THIS DAY GET ANY WORSE? 212 00:08:02,148 --> 00:08:03,358 HELLO, EVERYONE. 213 00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:04,776 COULD I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION, PLEASE? 214 00:08:04,818 --> 00:08:07,278 I KNOW THINGS HAVE BEEN A LITTLE ROUGH LATELY, 215 00:08:07,320 --> 00:08:08,780 AND I THOUGHT IT MIGHT BE A NICE BOOST OF MORALE 216 00:08:08,822 --> 00:08:12,158 TO START AN EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH PROGRAM. 217 00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:13,785 AHH. 218 00:08:13,827 --> 00:08:17,914 THE WINNER WOULD GET A PLAQUE, MY PARKING SPACE, 219 00:08:17,956 --> 00:08:20,375 AND ONE PAID VACATION DAY. 220 00:08:20,417 --> 00:08:22,961 [cheers and applause] 221 00:08:23,003 --> 00:08:25,922 MR. SCOTT. 222 00:08:25,964 --> 00:08:28,675 HEY, MIKELA LASKER. 223 00:08:28,717 --> 00:08:30,385 - HOW ARE YOU? - I'M GOOD. 224 00:08:30,427 --> 00:08:31,553 GOOD TO SEE YOU. WHERE'S YOUR SAXOPHONE. 225 00:08:31,594 --> 00:08:33,221 IT'S IN THE MUSIC ROOM, MR. SCOTT. 226 00:08:33,263 --> 00:08:35,265 EIGHTH-GRADE GRADUATION SHE GAVE A RENDITION 227 00:08:35,306 --> 00:08:36,599 OF WHEN THE SAINTS GO MARCHING IN 228 00:08:36,641 --> 00:08:37,809 THAT WOULD BLOW YOUR FREAKING MIND. 229 00:08:37,851 --> 00:08:38,935 WOW. 230 00:08:38,977 --> 00:08:40,395 WELL, YOU DIDN'T EVEN HEAR IT, SO... 231 00:08:40,437 --> 00:08:42,147 EVERYONE'S SO EXCITED THAT YOU'RE HERE TODAY. 232 00:08:42,188 --> 00:08:43,565 OH, GOOD. 233 00:08:43,606 --> 00:08:45,817 BY THE WAY, I'M AN EDITOR FOR THE SCHOOL PAPER NOW. 234 00:08:45,859 --> 00:08:47,152 OF COURSE YOU ARE. 235 00:08:47,193 --> 00:08:49,112 NOW, I KNOW YOU PROBABLY WANT TO SEE EVERYONE, 236 00:08:49,154 --> 00:08:51,990 BUT I WAS WONDERING IF I COULD ASK YOU SOME QUESTIONS FIRST. 237 00:08:52,032 --> 00:08:53,199 YOU'RE FAMOUS. 238 00:08:53,241 --> 00:08:54,409 I'M SURE YOU REMEMBER THIS PLACE. 239 00:08:54,451 --> 00:08:56,036 - OH, YEP. - DO YOU WANT TO GO IN? 240 00:08:56,077 --> 00:08:57,162 - YES. - NO, NOT AT ALL. 241 00:08:57,203 --> 00:08:58,163 - OH, OKAY. - NO. COME ON. LET'S GO. 242 00:08:58,204 --> 00:09:00,415 LET'S GET STARTED. 243 00:09:00,457 --> 00:09:01,833 - NOW... - OH. 244 00:09:01,875 --> 00:09:03,293 HOW DID YOU FIRST COME UP WITH THE IDEA 245 00:09:03,335 --> 00:09:04,461 FOR SCOTT'S TOTS. 246 00:09:04,502 --> 00:09:06,463 OKAY, WOW, COMING RIGHT AT ME. 247 00:09:06,504 --> 00:09:10,884 UM, WELL, IT IS NO SECRET THAT MY LAST NAME IS SCOTT. 248 00:09:10,925 --> 00:09:12,886 AND YOU WERE ALL TOTS AT THE TIME. 249 00:09:12,927 --> 00:09:15,889 NO, I MEAN, WHAT MADE YOU CHOOSE US? 250 00:09:15,930 --> 00:09:17,891 OKAY, WOW, FOLLOW-UP. 251 00:09:17,932 --> 00:09:20,518 UM, WELL, MIKELA, 252 00:09:20,560 --> 00:09:22,354 THIS--THIS IS YOUR ANSWER. 253 00:09:22,395 --> 00:09:24,230 I SAW YOU ALL THERE. 254 00:09:24,272 --> 00:09:25,690 I THOUGHT YOU WERE GREAT. 255 00:09:25,732 --> 00:09:29,069 AND I WANTED TO INSTILL SOME HOPE INTO YOUR LIVES. 256 00:09:29,110 --> 00:09:32,697 AND I NEVER INTENDED ANY BAD TO COME OF ANY OF IT. 257 00:09:32,739 --> 00:09:36,826 AND IT'S VERY IMPORTANT THAT YOU UNDERSTAND THAT. 258 00:09:36,868 --> 00:09:38,536 I JUST WANTED TO DO SOMETHING NICE. 259 00:09:38,578 --> 00:09:39,621 DO SOMETHING NICE? 260 00:09:39,662 --> 00:09:41,373 WHAT YOU DID WAS A MIRACLE. 261 00:09:41,414 --> 00:09:43,249 I WROTE MY COLLEGE ESSAY ON YOU. 262 00:09:43,291 --> 00:09:45,168 NO. 263 00:09:45,210 --> 00:09:46,711 - YES. - OKAY. 264 00:09:46,753 --> 00:09:48,588 NOW, ARE THERE ANY OTHER STUDENTS 265 00:09:48,630 --> 00:09:49,881 WHOSE COLLEGE TUITION YOU'RE PAYING FOR? 266 00:09:49,923 --> 00:09:53,385 OH, GOD. I DON'T-- I DON'T THINK SO. 267 00:09:53,426 --> 00:09:58,098 - HEY, JIMMY, WHAT'S UP? - NOT MUCH. 268 00:09:58,139 --> 00:10:00,183 COOL. VERY COOL. 269 00:10:00,225 --> 00:10:01,393 I BET IF YOU TRIED, 270 00:10:01,434 --> 00:10:02,435 YOU COULD GROW THE BEST BEARD 271 00:10:02,477 --> 00:10:04,562 OF ANYONE IN THIS OFFICE. 272 00:10:04,604 --> 00:10:06,022 [chuckles] THANKS, DWIGHT. 273 00:10:06,064 --> 00:10:08,149 - THAT LAUGH IS SO INFECTIOUS. - YOU'RE CREEPING ME OUT. 274 00:10:08,191 --> 00:10:09,734 - I'M GONNA GO. - [laughs] 275 00:10:09,776 --> 00:10:12,529 [stops abruptly] I DIDN'T MEAN ANY OF THOSE THINGS I JUST SAID. 276 00:10:12,570 --> 00:10:14,280 AND YOU CAN EXPECT THE SAME THING 277 00:10:14,322 --> 00:10:16,574 FROM EVERYONE IN THIS OFFICE IF YOU DON'T NIP 278 00:10:16,616 --> 00:10:19,577 THIS WHOLE EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH SITUATION IN THE BUD. 279 00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:21,162 YOU PLAN ON GIVING IT OUT FOR NEXT MONTH? 280 00:10:21,204 --> 00:10:22,580 - YES. THAT'S HOW IT WORKS. - IDIOT. 281 00:10:22,622 --> 00:10:24,499 WHY? SO EVERYONE CAN KISS YOUR GROSS ASS 282 00:10:24,541 --> 00:10:25,709 ALL MONTH LONG? 283 00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:29,170 LISTEN, GIVE IT OUT FOR LAST MONTH. 284 00:10:29,212 --> 00:10:31,047 MAKE IT ABOUT THE WORK. 285 00:10:31,089 --> 00:10:32,966 LET ME GUESS, YOU THINK YOU SHOULD GET IT. 286 00:10:33,008 --> 00:10:34,592 I DON'T NEED A PLAQUE FROM YOU TO TELL ME 287 00:10:34,634 --> 00:10:36,970 THAT I'M THE BEST SALESMAN IN THIS OFFICE. 288 00:10:37,012 --> 00:10:37,971 ALREADY HAVE ONE. 289 00:10:38,013 --> 00:10:41,182 MADE IT MYSELF MY FIRST DAY HERE. 290 00:10:41,224 --> 00:10:43,643 WELL, WHAT ABOUT ACCOUNTING OF CUSTOMER RELATIONS. 291 00:10:43,685 --> 00:10:45,520 THEY DON'T EVEN MAKE SALES. 292 00:10:45,562 --> 00:10:48,857 THIS ENCOMPASSES ALL AVAILABLE DATA. 293 00:10:48,898 --> 00:10:52,235 HOURS. TARDINESS. UNCONFIRMED SICK DAYS. 294 00:10:52,277 --> 00:10:53,570 PARTICIPATION. 295 00:10:53,611 --> 00:10:56,489 EVERYONE HAS BEEN ASSIGNED A RANDOM NUMBER 296 00:10:56,531 --> 00:10:58,950 FOR TOTAL FAIRNESS AND TRANSPARENCY. 297 00:10:58,992 --> 00:11:02,078 ALSO, THIS SHOULD BE ACCOMPANIED BY A MONETARY PRIZE. 298 00:11:02,120 --> 00:11:03,163 WELL, IN AN IDEAL WORLD-- 299 00:11:03,204 --> 00:11:04,456 IN AN IDEAL WORLD, 300 00:11:04,497 --> 00:11:05,790 I WOULD HAVE ALL TEN FINGERS ON MY LEFT HAND 301 00:11:05,832 --> 00:11:07,417 SO MY RIGHT HAND COULD JUST BE A FIST FOR PUNCHING. 302 00:11:07,459 --> 00:11:08,752 OKAY, IF IT'S ALL THE SAME TO YOU, 303 00:11:08,793 --> 00:11:10,295 I'M JUST GONNA TAKE AWAY "SURVIVAL SKILLS" 304 00:11:10,337 --> 00:11:11,796 AND "SELF-DEFENSE." 305 00:11:11,838 --> 00:11:14,215 I'M GONNA RUN THIS BY TOBY IN ACCOUNTING 306 00:11:14,257 --> 00:11:15,759 AND HAVE HIM ASSEMBLE THE DATA. 307 00:11:15,800 --> 00:11:21,348 THAT'S OKAY. I'LL DO IT. 308 00:11:23,558 --> 00:11:24,601 OH, YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU KNOW WHAT? 309 00:11:24,642 --> 00:11:26,519 I SHOULDN'T GO IN THERE. I'M PRETTY BUSY. 310 00:11:26,561 --> 00:11:28,104 - I SHOULD-- - WE JUST WANT TO SAY THANKS. 311 00:11:28,146 --> 00:11:30,982 OH. 312 00:11:31,024 --> 00:11:33,651 [cheers and applause] 313 00:11:33,693 --> 00:11:38,698 [chanting "Mr. Scott"] 314 00:11:42,410 --> 00:11:43,912 MR. SCOTT, I KNOW YOU'RE A BUSY MAN 315 00:11:43,953 --> 00:11:45,830 AND YOUR SCHEDULE MOVES AROUND A LOT, 316 00:11:45,872 --> 00:11:48,583 BUT THROUGH ALL YOUR GENEROSITY THROUGH THE YEARS, 317 00:11:48,625 --> 00:11:51,378 YOUR TOTS, WHO ARE READY TO GRADUATE, 318 00:11:51,419 --> 00:11:55,048 THOUGHT IT WAS TIME TO GIVE YOU A PROPER THANK YOU. 319 00:11:55,090 --> 00:11:58,551 [slapping desks and clapping rhythmically] 320 00:11:58,593 --> 00:12:00,595 - OH. - WHAT? 321 00:12:00,637 --> 00:12:01,805 - OH. - BREAK IT DOWN. 322 00:12:01,846 --> 00:12:03,556 all: * HEY, MR. SCOTT ♪ 323 00:12:03,598 --> 00:12:05,016 ♪ WHAT YOU GONNA DO? ♪ 324 00:12:05,058 --> 00:12:07,060 ♪ WHAT YOU GONNA DO? MAKE OUR DREAMS COME TRUE ♪ 325 00:12:07,102 --> 00:12:09,479 ♪ HEY, MR. SCOTT, WHAT YOU GONNA DO? ♪ 326 00:12:09,521 --> 00:12:12,023 ♪ WHAT YOU GONNA DO? MAKE OUR DREAMS COME TRUE ♪ 327 00:12:12,065 --> 00:12:13,858 * YOU CAME INTO OUR LIVES AND MADE A PROMISE ♪ 328 00:12:13,900 --> 00:12:16,486 ♪ THAT MADE US HONEST, MADE US REALIZE ♪ 329 00:12:16,528 --> 00:12:19,572 ♪ WE DON'T NEED TO COMPROMISE 'CAUSE WE CAN HAVE IT ALL ♪ 330 00:12:19,614 --> 00:12:21,074 ♪ 'CAUSE YOU MADE IT POSSIBLE ♪ 331 00:12:21,116 --> 00:12:23,785 ♪ FOR US TO ACHIEVE THE IMPROBABLE ♪ 332 00:12:23,827 --> 00:12:25,620 - ♪ HEY * - * HEY ♪ 333 00:12:25,662 --> 00:12:26,955 - * HEY * - * HEY ♪ 334 00:12:26,996 --> 00:12:29,499 all: * HEY, MR. SCOTT, WHAT YOU GONNA DO? ♪ 335 00:12:29,541 --> 00:12:32,836 ♪ WHAT YOU GONNA DO? MAKE OUR DREAMS COME TRUE ♪ 336 00:12:32,877 --> 00:12:35,171 WOW! 337 00:12:35,213 --> 00:12:40,135 [applause] 338 00:12:40,176 --> 00:12:43,513 [cheers] 339 00:12:43,555 --> 00:12:46,683 HEY, SO JIM THOUGHT IT WOULD BE IDEAL 340 00:12:46,725 --> 00:12:49,644 - IF WE ALL PITCHED IN-- - HEY. 341 00:12:49,686 --> 00:12:51,438 SO JIM THOUGHT IT WOULD BE IDEAL 342 00:12:51,479 --> 00:12:52,814 IF WE ALL PITCHED IN A TWENTY 343 00:12:52,856 --> 00:12:54,566 FOR THIS WHOLE EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH THING. 344 00:12:54,607 --> 00:12:56,568 JIM SAID THAT? 345 00:12:56,609 --> 00:12:59,529 HE THOUGHT YOU WERE DOING AN INCREDIBLE JOB LAST MONTH. 346 00:12:59,571 --> 00:13:02,532 - JIM SAID THAT? - YOU SEEM SURPRISED. 347 00:13:02,574 --> 00:13:06,745 NO, NO. THAT MAKES TOTAL SENSE. 348 00:13:09,706 --> 00:13:12,000 - HEY, BUDDY. - SURE. 349 00:13:12,042 --> 00:13:14,669 SO EVERY-- 350 00:13:14,711 --> 00:13:17,630 FIVE MINUTES AHEAD OF SCHEDULE. 351 00:13:17,672 --> 00:13:19,799 RIGHT ON SCHEDULE. 352 00:13:19,841 --> 00:13:21,843 POLITICIANS ARE ALWAYS COMING AROUND 353 00:13:21,885 --> 00:13:23,720 TELLING US THEY'RE GOING TO FIX OUR SCHOOLS. 354 00:13:23,762 --> 00:13:26,348 PROMISING THIS AND THAT. 355 00:13:26,389 --> 00:13:27,807 BUT YOU, MR. SCOTT... 356 00:13:27,849 --> 00:13:31,436 [chuckles] YOU ARE ACTUALLY DOING IT. 357 00:13:31,478 --> 00:13:32,979 YOU HAVE TAUGHT THESE KIDS, 358 00:13:33,021 --> 00:13:35,565 WITH HARD WORK THAT ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE. 359 00:13:35,607 --> 00:13:40,362 YOU ARE A DREAM MAKER. AND I THANK YOU. 360 00:13:40,403 --> 00:13:44,282 I THANK YOU. I THANK YOU. I THANK YOU. I THANK YOU. 361 00:13:44,324 --> 00:13:46,701 - OH. - SO MUCH. 362 00:13:46,743 --> 00:13:49,204 THANK YOU SO MUCH. 363 00:13:49,245 --> 00:13:51,956 HONESTLY, THE ONLY THING THAT IS KEEPING ME HERE RIGHT NOW 364 00:13:51,998 --> 00:13:55,043 IS THAT THERE MIGHT BE ANOTHER RAP. 365 00:13:55,085 --> 00:13:57,087 OKAY, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WELCOME. 366 00:13:57,128 --> 00:13:58,588 I KNOW YOU'RE ALL VERY EXCITED. 367 00:13:58,630 --> 00:13:59,964 BUT NO MATTER WHO GETS THIS, 368 00:14:00,006 --> 00:14:02,008 [mock emotional tone] I JUST WANTED TO SAY 369 00:14:02,050 --> 00:14:03,885 THAT YOU GUYS ARE ALL EMPLOYEES OF THE MONTH IN MY EYES. 370 00:14:03,927 --> 00:14:05,845 [Dwight laughs forcibly] 371 00:14:05,887 --> 00:14:07,305 WAIT, IT'S FOR LAST MONTH? I DIDN'T KNOW. 372 00:14:07,347 --> 00:14:08,473 I WOULD HAVE TRIED HARDER. 373 00:14:08,515 --> 00:14:09,891 THAT'S THE WHOLE POINT. 374 00:14:09,933 --> 00:14:11,935 - THIS IS STUPID. - YOU'RE EMBARRASSING ME. 375 00:14:11,976 --> 00:14:14,270 WOW, ALREADY MAKING A PLAY FOR NEXT MONTH. 376 00:14:14,312 --> 00:14:16,356 GREAT. THAT'S THE SPIRIT BEHIND EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH. 377 00:14:16,398 --> 00:14:19,651 ALL RIGHT, AND THE WINNER IS EMPLOYEE NUMBER NINE. 378 00:14:19,693 --> 00:14:21,236 AND THAT IS? 379 00:14:21,277 --> 00:14:25,573 NUMBER NINE, NUMBER NINE. JIM HALPERT. 380 00:14:25,615 --> 00:14:26,783 - HUH? - WHAT? 381 00:14:26,825 --> 00:14:28,785 - ARE YOU KIDDING ME? - OH, NO. 382 00:14:28,827 --> 00:14:31,329 I KNEW SOMETHING WAS ROTTEN IN THE STATE OF DENMARK. 383 00:14:31,371 --> 00:14:32,497 SHAKESPEARE. 384 00:14:32,539 --> 00:14:36,376 WAIT, I WAS NOT-- I DID NOT-- 385 00:14:36,418 --> 00:14:41,756 [mock stuttering] I DID NOT. THAT WAS NOT. HOW COME NOT? 386 00:14:41,798 --> 00:14:44,926 GUYS, LISTEN, THIS WAS ANONYMOUS, ALL RIGHT? 387 00:14:44,968 --> 00:14:46,678 THERE'S NO WAY I COULD'VE GIVEN IT TO MYSELF 388 00:14:46,720 --> 00:14:49,097 BECAUSE I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WHO WAS ON HERE. 389 00:14:49,139 --> 00:14:50,849 I JUST GAVE IT TO THE EMPLOYEE WITH THE HIGHEST OVERALL SCORE. 390 00:14:50,890 --> 00:14:52,100 WHAT A SCAM. 391 00:14:52,142 --> 00:14:54,060 YOU'RE A PIECE OF WORK, BEESLY. 392 00:14:54,102 --> 00:14:56,479 [spits] 393 00:14:56,521 --> 00:14:59,441 TO MY TALLY, YOU JUST WON BACK YOUR OWN PARKING SPOT, 394 00:14:59,482 --> 00:15:00,775 A VACATION DAY, 395 00:15:00,817 --> 00:15:03,653 AND A NICE, TIDY QUARTER OF $1,000 FROM ALL OF US. 396 00:15:03,695 --> 00:15:04,904 WILL EVERYBODY JUST STOP FOR A SECOND, 397 00:15:04,946 --> 00:15:06,448 'CAUSE OBVIOUSLY I'M NOT TAKING ANY OF IT. 398 00:15:06,489 --> 00:15:08,700 A MISTAKE HAS BEEN MADE AND WE'LL FIGURE IT OUT. 399 00:15:08,742 --> 00:15:10,577 SECOND OF ALL, THERE WAS NO CASH PRIZE. 400 00:15:10,618 --> 00:15:11,828 - YES. - DWIGHT? 401 00:15:11,870 --> 00:15:13,121 YEAH, YOU SAID "IN AN IDEAL WORLD, 402 00:15:13,163 --> 00:15:14,456 THERE WOULD BE A CASH PRIZE." 403 00:15:14,497 --> 00:15:15,790 ISN'T THAT WHAT YOU SAID? 404 00:15:15,832 --> 00:15:17,625 NO, DWIGHT, I MEANT "YES, IN A PERFECT WORLD, 405 00:15:17,667 --> 00:15:19,252 SOMEONE WOULD GET MONEY, BUT NOT--" 406 00:15:19,294 --> 00:15:22,797 YEAH, BUT IN YOUR PERFECT WORLD, ONLY YOU GET MONEY. 407 00:15:22,839 --> 00:15:26,343 [employees protesting] 408 00:15:26,384 --> 00:15:28,303 THERE WERE A LOT OF TIMES OVER THE YEARS 409 00:15:28,345 --> 00:15:30,263 WHERE I WAS PRESSURED TO GET INTO THE DRUG GAME. 410 00:15:30,305 --> 00:15:32,390 BUT I ALWAYS THOUGHT BACK TO MY GUARDIAN ANGEL... 411 00:15:32,432 --> 00:15:34,100 [sobbing] 412 00:15:34,142 --> 00:15:35,810 AND THE GIFT THAT YOU GAVE ME. 413 00:15:35,852 --> 00:15:37,479 SO I JUST WANT TO THANK YOU 414 00:15:37,520 --> 00:15:40,273 FOR GIVING ME THE OPPORTUNITY TO GO TO COLLEGE, 415 00:15:40,315 --> 00:15:41,316 EDUCATE MYSELF, 416 00:15:41,358 --> 00:15:43,610 AND BECOME THE NEXT PRESIDENT OBAMA. 417 00:15:43,651 --> 00:15:47,072 OH GOD. 418 00:15:47,113 --> 00:15:50,867 OHH, GOD 419 00:15:50,909 --> 00:15:53,078 [employees protesting] 420 00:15:53,119 --> 00:15:55,205 IS THIS WHY YOU BECAME CO-MANAGER, 421 00:15:55,246 --> 00:15:57,332 SO YOU COULD BECOME EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH TOO. 422 00:15:57,374 --> 00:16:00,919 LOOK, THERE WAS A BIG MISTAKE, OBVIOUSLY, SO I WILL FIX IT. 423 00:16:00,960 --> 00:16:03,171 OKAY? THIS WAS YOUR IDEA ANYWAY. 424 00:16:03,213 --> 00:16:05,882 CORRECTION. IT WAS MY IDEA. 425 00:16:05,924 --> 00:16:09,511 - OKAY. - [whispers] MY IDEA. 426 00:16:09,552 --> 00:16:11,930 GUYS, I'M STARTING TO THINK PAM'S NOT EVEN PREGNANT. 427 00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:15,350 OKAY. FOR THE RECORD, I AM PREGNANT. 428 00:16:15,392 --> 00:16:18,186 AND, OBVIOUSLY, THERE'S BEEN SOME KIND OF A MISTAKE. 429 00:16:18,228 --> 00:16:20,313 SO WHY DOESN'T JIM JUST PICK 430 00:16:20,355 --> 00:16:23,692 THE NEXT HIGHEST SCORE ON THE LIST AND WE'LL MOVE ON. 431 00:16:23,733 --> 00:16:24,859 - YEAH. OKAY. - THAT'S FAIR. 432 00:16:24,901 --> 00:16:26,403 - FINE. - EXCELLENT IDEA, PAM. 433 00:16:26,444 --> 00:16:27,779 THANK YOU. 434 00:16:27,821 --> 00:16:31,408 THAT WOULD BE EMPLOYEE NUMBER THREE, WHICH IS... 435 00:16:31,449 --> 00:16:33,827 SON OF A BITCH! 436 00:16:33,868 --> 00:16:36,871 PAM HALPERT. [employees protesting] 437 00:16:36,913 --> 00:16:39,624 HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE? NO OFFENSE, PAM. 438 00:16:39,666 --> 00:16:41,668 BUT HOW THE HELL IS THAT POSSIBLE? 439 00:16:41,710 --> 00:16:45,005 THERE MUST BE SOME REASONABLE EXPLANATION FOR THIS. 440 00:16:45,046 --> 00:16:47,924 NO, WAIT, COME ON. I-I DIDN'T MISS A DAY. 441 00:16:47,966 --> 00:16:49,843 I CAME IN EARLY. I STAYED LATE. 442 00:16:49,884 --> 00:16:51,845 AND I DOUBLED MY SALES LAST MONTH. 443 00:16:51,886 --> 00:16:53,847 OH, REALLY, FROM WHAT, TWO TO FOUR? 444 00:16:53,888 --> 00:16:55,140 YEP. 445 00:16:55,181 --> 00:16:56,725 HOW DID YOU NOT THINK WE WOULD REALIZE 446 00:16:56,766 --> 00:16:58,059 WHAT YOU WERE DOING? 447 00:16:58,101 --> 00:17:00,562 GUYS, THIS ISN'T SOME ELABORATE SCAM, OKAY? 448 00:17:00,603 --> 00:17:04,566 HI, I HAVE AN ORDER HERE FOR A CUSTOM CAKE, JIM HALPERT. 449 00:17:04,607 --> 00:17:08,403 OKAY. THAT IS ME, BUT I DIDN'T ORDER THE CAKE. 450 00:17:08,445 --> 00:17:09,654 OH, I DON'T KNOW. 451 00:17:09,696 --> 00:17:14,117 - JUST SIGN HERE. - GREAT. 452 00:17:14,159 --> 00:17:16,202 - THANKS. - YEAH. 453 00:17:20,957 --> 00:17:26,004 I ONLY GOT A 1, MAN, SO... SORRY. 454 00:17:26,046 --> 00:17:29,090 LOOK WHO IT IS. [employees protesting] 455 00:17:29,132 --> 00:17:32,344 "IT COULD ONLY BE YOU." 456 00:17:32,385 --> 00:17:33,928 IF THAT'S A JOKE, IT'S NOT FUNNY. 457 00:17:33,970 --> 00:17:35,764 AND IF THAT REAL, IT'S UNCONSCIONABLE. 458 00:17:35,805 --> 00:17:37,098 I DIDN'T ORDER THE CAKE. 459 00:17:37,140 --> 00:17:40,185 IT'S GOT A GIANT PICTURE OF MY FACE ON IT. 460 00:17:40,226 --> 00:17:41,936 DOES THAT SOUND LIKE SOMETHING I'D DO? 461 00:17:41,978 --> 00:17:43,855 I GUESS IT'S JUST A WORLDWIDE CONSPIRACY. 462 00:17:43,897 --> 00:17:45,273 [laughs] 463 00:17:45,315 --> 00:17:47,776 OKAY, I AM OBVIOUSLY NOT EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH. 464 00:17:47,817 --> 00:17:49,778 FINE. CLEARLY PAM ISN'T EITHER. 465 00:17:49,819 --> 00:17:50,904 CLEARLY? WHY IS THAT CLEAR? 466 00:17:50,945 --> 00:17:52,155 I DOUBLED MY SALES. 467 00:17:52,197 --> 00:17:54,366 IT'S THE BETRAYAL THAT HURTS THE MOST. 468 00:17:54,407 --> 00:17:56,534 THAT'S IT. OKAY, FROM RIGHT NOW ON 469 00:17:56,576 --> 00:17:58,286 EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH IS CANCELED, OKAY? 470 00:17:58,328 --> 00:17:59,245 HAPPY? 471 00:17:59,287 --> 00:18:04,626 YEAH, THAT'S A GREAT SOLUTION, 472 00:18:04,668 --> 00:18:06,670 NOBODY CAN. 473 00:18:06,711 --> 00:18:07,921 [groans] 474 00:18:07,962 --> 00:18:10,924 THIS IS OUTRAGEOUS. 475 00:18:10,965 --> 00:18:12,300 I'M GONNA HAVE SOME CAKE. 476 00:18:12,342 --> 00:18:14,511 AND LET'S PUT YOUR HANDS TOGETHER 477 00:18:14,552 --> 00:18:15,679 AND GIVE A WARM WELCOME 478 00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:18,181 FOR THE MAN OF THE HOUR, MR. MICHAEL SCOTT. 479 00:18:18,223 --> 00:18:23,812 [cheers and applause] 480 00:18:23,853 --> 00:18:28,983 THANK YOU. 481 00:18:29,025 --> 00:18:30,944 ALL RIGHT. WOW. 482 00:18:30,985 --> 00:18:34,698 UM, I AM NEVER GOING TO FORGET TODAY. 483 00:18:34,739 --> 00:18:36,074 NOT A CHANCE. 484 00:18:36,116 --> 00:18:38,910 I DON'T THINK I COULD EVER GIVE BACK TO YOU 485 00:18:38,952 --> 00:18:40,495 WHAT YOU HAVE GIVEN ME TODAY. 486 00:18:40,537 --> 00:18:43,248 WHO HERE HAS DONE SOMETHING STUPID IN THEIR LIVES, 487 00:18:43,289 --> 00:18:46,501 LIKE SKIPPED OUT ON STUDY HALL OR MIX UP THE DIFFERENCE 488 00:18:46,543 --> 00:18:48,628 BETWEEN "A" GYM AND "B" GYM, THAT SORT OF THING? 489 00:18:48,670 --> 00:18:51,840 SHOW OF HANDS. ANYBODY. YES. BUNCH OF YOU. OKAY. 490 00:18:51,881 --> 00:18:53,341 WELL, ME TOO. 491 00:18:53,383 --> 00:18:56,261 I'VE DONE SOMETHING STUPID, WHICH I WOULD LIKE TO SHARE. 492 00:18:56,302 --> 00:19:00,432 UM... [school bell rings] 493 00:19:00,473 --> 00:19:02,934 - SHOULD WE GO? - OH, NO. WE'RE OKAY. 494 00:19:02,976 --> 00:19:05,729 - IT'S A--IT'S A DOUBLE PERIOD. - AH. ALL RIGHT. 495 00:19:05,770 --> 00:19:09,315 I CAME HERE TODAY BECAUSE I PROMISED YOU TUITION. 496 00:19:09,357 --> 00:19:11,693 AND TUITION IS VERY VALUABLE. 497 00:19:11,735 --> 00:19:15,697 BUT YOU KNOW WHAT'S INVALUABLE IS INTUITION. 498 00:19:15,739 --> 00:19:17,032 YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS? 499 00:19:17,073 --> 00:19:19,451 THAT IS THE ABILITY TO KNOW 500 00:19:19,492 --> 00:19:22,537 WHEN SOMETHING IS ABOUT TO HAPPEN. 501 00:19:22,579 --> 00:19:24,873 DOES ANYBODY OUT THERE HAVE INTUITION? 502 00:19:24,914 --> 00:19:27,208 KNOW WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN NEXT? 503 00:19:27,250 --> 00:19:30,128 NOBODY? OKAY. YOU'RE GONNA MAKE ME SAY IT. 504 00:19:30,170 --> 00:19:33,548 ALL RIGHT, I AM SO PROUD 505 00:19:33,590 --> 00:19:36,134 OF ALL OF YOU. 506 00:19:36,176 --> 00:19:38,345 DERRICK, AND LEFERVRE, 507 00:19:38,386 --> 00:19:40,930 AND--AND BEN, AND AYANA, AND MIKELA, 508 00:19:40,972 --> 00:19:43,975 AND NIKKI, AND JASON, AND... 509 00:19:44,017 --> 00:19:45,769 I'M--SORRY, OKAY. 510 00:19:45,810 --> 00:19:47,062 SORRY. SPACING. YOUR NAME. 511 00:19:47,103 --> 00:19:49,689 I'M ZION. I'M MIKELA'S YOUNGER BROTHER. 512 00:19:49,731 --> 00:19:52,067 WELL, ZION, I AM NOT GOING TO BE PAYING FOR YOUR TUITION. 513 00:19:52,108 --> 00:19:53,777 [students laugh] 514 00:19:53,818 --> 00:19:55,820 [laughs nervously] 515 00:19:55,862 --> 00:19:57,322 WHICH BRINGS ME TO MY MAIN POINT 516 00:19:57,364 --> 00:19:59,240 AND THAT IS THAT I WILL NOT BE ABLE TO PAY 517 00:19:59,282 --> 00:20:03,536 FOR ANYBODY'S TUITION. 518 00:20:03,578 --> 00:20:07,207 I'M SO, SO SORRY. 519 00:20:07,248 --> 00:20:10,085 - YOU'RE KIDDING. - EXCUSE ME? 520 00:20:10,126 --> 00:20:14,297 [students shouting angrily] 521 00:20:17,759 --> 00:20:19,594 [students shouting angrily] 522 00:20:19,636 --> 00:20:21,763 EXPLAIN YOURSELF, SIR. 523 00:20:21,805 --> 00:20:25,350 I'M SORRY. I'M SORRY. I'M SO SORRY. 524 00:20:25,392 --> 00:20:30,689 - YOU LIED TO US. - I LIED TO MYSELF TOO. 525 00:20:30,730 --> 00:20:32,482 I'M NOT A MILLIONAIRE. 526 00:20:32,524 --> 00:20:34,025 I THOUGHT I WOULD BE BY THE TIME I WAS 30, 527 00:20:34,067 --> 00:20:35,527 BUT I WASN'T EVEN CLOSE. 528 00:20:35,568 --> 00:20:38,279 AND THEN I THOUGHT MAYBE BY THE TIME I WAS 40. 529 00:20:38,321 --> 00:20:41,199 BUT BY 40, I HAD LESS MONEY THAN WHEN I WAS 30. 530 00:20:41,241 --> 00:20:42,617 MAYBE BY MY 50s, I DON'T KNOW. 531 00:20:42,659 --> 00:20:46,496 I WANTED TO PAY FOR YOUR EDUCATION. 532 00:20:46,538 --> 00:20:50,500 I REALLY DID. IT WAS MY DREAM. 533 00:20:50,542 --> 00:20:52,002 SOME PEOPLE HAVE EVIL DREAMS. 534 00:20:52,043 --> 00:20:54,671 SOME PEOPLE HAVE SELFISH DREAMS 535 00:20:54,713 --> 00:20:56,214 OR WET DREAMS. 536 00:20:56,256 --> 00:20:57,841 MY DREAM WAS IN THE RIGHT PLACE. 537 00:20:57,882 --> 00:21:02,137 - YOU OWE THIS TO US. - OKAY, HOLD ON. HOLD ON. 538 00:21:02,178 --> 00:21:06,099 NOW I CAN'T PAY FOR YOUR COLLEGE. 539 00:21:06,141 --> 00:21:09,060 BUT YOU DON'T HAVE TO GO TO CLASS 540 00:21:09,102 --> 00:21:11,229 TO BE IN CLASS. 541 00:21:11,271 --> 00:21:14,649 ONLINE COURSES ARE A VIABLE OPTION 542 00:21:14,691 --> 00:21:16,818 TO A TRADITIONAL COLLEGE EXPERIENCE. 543 00:21:16,860 --> 00:21:19,237 AND THE BEST WAY TO ACCESS THOSE COURSES 544 00:21:19,279 --> 00:21:22,741 IS WITH YOUR OWN PERSONAL LAPTOP. 545 00:21:22,782 --> 00:21:26,661 WHICH IS RENDERED USELESS WITHOUT BATTERIES. 546 00:21:26,703 --> 00:21:28,371 AND I HAVE ONE FOR EACH OF YOU. 547 00:21:28,413 --> 00:21:32,834 [students shouting angrily] 548 00:21:32,876 --> 00:21:36,421 HEY, HOLD--HOLD ON. HOLD ON. HOLD ON. HOLD ON. 549 00:21:36,463 --> 00:21:38,006 HOLD ON. THEY'RE LITHIUM. 550 00:21:38,048 --> 00:21:42,594 [students shouting angrily] 551 00:21:49,976 --> 00:21:51,144 GREAT PARTY, JIM. 552 00:21:51,186 --> 00:21:52,854 BUT IT'S NOT A PARTY. 553 00:21:52,896 --> 00:21:54,022 IT'S NOT A SANCTIONED PARTY. 554 00:21:54,064 --> 00:21:55,231 BECAUSE I DIDN'T ORDER THE CAKE. 555 00:21:55,273 --> 00:21:56,816 DO I STILL GET THAT PAID VACATION DAY? 556 00:21:56,858 --> 00:21:59,944 HON, CAN WE TALK ABOUT IT LATER, MAYBE? 557 00:21:59,986 --> 00:22:01,488 YEAH. 558 00:22:01,529 --> 00:22:03,156 I DON'T KNOW WHAT EVERYONE IS GETTING SO UPSET ABOUT. 559 00:22:03,198 --> 00:22:04,449 IT'S WAS JUST MATHEMATICAL. 560 00:22:04,491 --> 00:22:06,117 IF ANYONE SHOULD BE UPSET, IT SHOULD BE ME, 561 00:22:06,159 --> 00:22:07,535 'CAUSE I HAD THE HIGHEST SALES FIGURES. 562 00:22:07,577 --> 00:22:10,372 ACTUALLY, IF ANYONE SHOULD BE UPSET, IT'S ME, 563 00:22:10,413 --> 00:22:12,290 BECAUSE THE WHOLE DAMN THING WAS MY IDEA. 564 00:22:12,332 --> 00:22:13,792 THAT IS TRUE. 565 00:22:13,833 --> 00:22:15,543 IT WAS ANDY'S IDEA. 566 00:22:15,585 --> 00:22:17,170 MY IDEA. 567 00:22:17,212 --> 00:22:19,631 OH, GOTTA TAKE THIS. 568 00:22:19,673 --> 00:22:21,424 MOSE JUST LEARNED HOW TO USE A PHONE. 569 00:22:21,466 --> 00:22:24,094 LET'S JUST SAY EVERY DAY HAS BEEN AN ADVENTURE. 570 00:22:24,135 --> 00:22:26,471 [laughs] 571 00:22:26,513 --> 00:22:27,764 DAVID WALLACE'S OFFICE. 572 00:22:27,806 --> 00:22:29,349 [imitating Kevin] THIS IS KEVIN MALONE. 573 00:22:29,391 --> 00:22:30,850 IS DAVID THERE? 574 00:22:30,892 --> 00:22:32,477 NO, HE'S IN HIS WEEKLY STAFF MEETING. 575 00:22:32,519 --> 00:22:33,978 CAN I TAKE A MESSAGE? 576 00:22:34,020 --> 00:22:36,815 TELL HIM I'M MAD AT JIM, 577 00:22:36,856 --> 00:22:40,652 'CAUSE HE'S ASKING US TO GIVE MONEY TO PAM. 578 00:22:40,694 --> 00:22:43,154 [imitating Stanley] THIS IS STANLEY HUDSON. 579 00:22:43,196 --> 00:22:46,157 JIM HALPERT IS A MENACE. 580 00:22:46,199 --> 00:22:48,493 [imitating Toby] IT'S TOBY FLENDERSON. 581 00:22:48,535 --> 00:22:51,538 LISTEN, THINGS ARE GETTING REALLY BAD DOWN HERE. 582 00:22:51,579 --> 00:22:53,289 [imitating Meredith] IT'S MEREDITH PALMER. 583 00:22:53,331 --> 00:22:56,918 LISTEN, KID, I'M GONNA BE DRUNK AS SKUNK 584 00:22:56,960 --> 00:23:00,171 AND YOU DON'T NEED TO TELL ME ABOUT CROTCH INJURIES. 585 00:23:00,213 --> 00:23:03,425 BUT JIM HALPERT IS A [bleep] PRICK. 586 00:23:08,430 --> 00:23:12,851 HEY, MR. SCOTT. 587 00:23:12,892 --> 00:23:16,187 ERIN, CAN YOU GIVE US A SECOND? 588 00:23:16,229 --> 00:23:17,522 THAT WAS MESSED UP WHAT YOU DID. 589 00:23:17,564 --> 00:23:20,400 YEAH. YEAH. I KNOW. I KNOW. I KNOW. I'M SORRY. 590 00:23:20,442 --> 00:23:21,818 WHO DOES SOMETHING LIKE THAT? 591 00:23:21,860 --> 00:23:23,820 WHO PROMISES THAT TO A BUNCH OF KIDS 592 00:23:23,862 --> 00:23:28,033 AND THEN JUST DOESN'T COME THROUGH LIKE THAT? 593 00:23:28,074 --> 00:23:30,744 - WHAT CAN I DO? - YOU CAN PAY FOR MY COLLEGE. 594 00:23:30,785 --> 00:23:32,996 I CAN GIVE YOU AN EXTRA LAPTOP BATTERY. 595 00:23:33,038 --> 00:23:36,166 NOT EVERYONE TOOK ONE. 596 00:23:36,207 --> 00:23:41,338 - [sighs] - [sighs] HOW ABOUT THIS... 597 00:23:41,379 --> 00:23:44,215 IF YOU CAN FIND A WAY TO PAY FOR YOUR TUITION, 598 00:23:44,257 --> 00:23:46,384 LET ME BUY YOUR BOOKS, OKAY? 599 00:23:46,426 --> 00:23:47,344 THEY'RE EXPENSIVE. 600 00:23:47,385 --> 00:23:48,803 YEAH, WELL, 601 00:23:48,845 --> 00:23:50,722 I OWE YOU THAT AT LEAST, RIGHT? 602 00:23:50,764 --> 00:23:54,434 - IT'S ABOUT $1,000. - [exhales] REALLY. WOW. 603 00:23:54,476 --> 00:23:57,395 THAT'S--THAT'S OVER $200 A YEAR. 604 00:23:57,437 --> 00:24:00,774 - NO, $1,000 EACH YEAR. - FOR--OKAY. 605 00:24:00,815 --> 00:24:02,609 OKAY. 606 00:24:02,650 --> 00:24:04,027 HERE'S WHAT I'M GONNA DO, 607 00:24:04,069 --> 00:24:07,030 I'M GONNA WRITE FOUR CHECKS FOR $1,000 EACH. 608 00:24:07,072 --> 00:24:09,491 I'M GOING TO DATE THEM ONE YEAR APART. 609 00:24:09,532 --> 00:24:11,576 NOW, YOU ARE TO USE ONE CHECK A YEAR. 610 00:24:11,618 --> 00:24:13,203 AND PLEASE CALL ME BEFORE YOU CASH THE CHECK. 611 00:24:13,244 --> 00:24:14,579 YEAH. YEAH. 612 00:24:14,621 --> 00:24:16,539 'CAUSE I'VE GOT MONIES TO MOVE AROUND, OKAY? 613 00:24:16,581 --> 00:24:17,874 MAKE IT OUT TO MY MOM, ROSA. 614 00:24:17,916 --> 00:24:21,586 - [exhales] - THAT'S A LOT OF ZEROES. 615 00:24:21,628 --> 00:24:25,840 - [phone rings] - DUNDER MIFFLIN, THIS IS RYAN. 616 00:24:25,882 --> 00:24:28,385 SURE THING, DAVID. I WILL TR... 617 00:24:28,426 --> 00:24:31,930 SURE THING, MR. WALLACE. I WILL TRANSFER YOU. 618 00:24:31,971 --> 00:24:34,224 [phone rings] 619 00:24:34,265 --> 00:24:35,517 THIS IS JIM. 620 00:24:35,558 --> 00:24:37,268 JIM, WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING THERE? 621 00:24:37,310 --> 00:24:39,396 - HEY, UH, DAVID. - YES. 622 00:24:39,437 --> 00:24:40,689 SO THERE WAS A LITTLE BIT 623 00:24:40,730 --> 00:24:42,774 OF A MISCOMMUNICATION HERE TODAY. 624 00:24:42,816 --> 00:24:45,443 IT'S BEEN A LITTLE WILD. UH, BUT I AM ON IT. 625 00:24:45,485 --> 00:24:47,278 JUST SO I UNDERSTAND, 626 00:24:47,320 --> 00:24:48,697 YOU STARTED EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH, 627 00:24:48,738 --> 00:24:51,449 GIVE IT TO YOURSELF, THEN PEOPLE COMPLAIN, 628 00:24:51,491 --> 00:24:52,575 SO YOU GIVE IT TO YOUR WIFE? 629 00:24:52,617 --> 00:24:53,910 - NO. - AM I MISSING SOMETHING? 630 00:24:53,952 --> 00:24:55,662 I REALLY DON'T KNOW HOW IT HAPPENED, DAVID. 631 00:24:55,704 --> 00:24:57,872 I KNOW HOW IT HAPPENED. 632 00:25:05,088 --> 00:25:06,339 JIM, I BUMPED YOU UP 633 00:25:06,381 --> 00:25:08,049 BECAUSE I THOUGHT YOU COULD MAKE MY LIFE EASIER. 634 00:25:08,091 --> 00:25:09,134 IF YOU CAN'T DO THAT, 635 00:25:09,175 --> 00:25:11,469 WE'RE GONNA HAVE A SEPARATE DISCUSSION. 636 00:25:11,511 --> 00:25:13,722 ALL RIGHT, IT WILL NOT HAPPEN AGAIN. 637 00:25:13,763 --> 00:25:15,807 I PROMISE. 638 00:25:15,849 --> 00:25:20,603 UH, HEY, I'M SORRY. I'M TAKING THIS OUT ON YOU. 639 00:25:20,645 --> 00:25:22,147 - NO. - IT'S BEEN CRAZY HERE. 640 00:25:22,188 --> 00:25:24,482 YOU KNOW I THINK YOU'RE DOING A GREAT JOB, RIGHT? 641 00:25:24,524 --> 00:25:26,317 - WHAT? - YEAH. THANK YOU. 642 00:25:26,359 --> 00:25:28,737 - NO. - OKAY. [laughs] 643 00:25:28,778 --> 00:25:30,488 HEY, WE STILL ON FOR DINNER THIS WEEKEND? 644 00:25:30,530 --> 00:25:31,823 - WHAT? - YES. 645 00:25:31,865 --> 00:25:34,117 - OKAY. - OH, YOU'RE KIDDING ME! 646 00:25:34,159 --> 00:25:36,286 - SEE YOU. - DAMN IT! 647 00:25:36,327 --> 00:25:39,330 [softly] * HEY, MR. SCOTT, WHAT YOU GONNA DO? ♪ 648 00:25:39,372 --> 00:25:42,083 ♪ WHAT YOU GONNA DO? MAKE OUR DREAMS COME TRUE ♪ 649 00:25:42,125 --> 00:25:45,170 ♪ HEY, MR. SCOTT, WHAT YOU GONNA DO? ♪ 650 00:25:45,211 --> 00:25:47,839 PLEASE STOP. 651 00:25:47,881 --> 00:25:51,760 15 LIVES. 652 00:25:51,801 --> 00:25:53,970 I DESTROYED 15 YOUNG LIVES TODAY. 653 00:25:54,012 --> 00:25:56,473 - NO. - YES. 654 00:25:56,514 --> 00:25:58,683 NO. THERE'S FINANCIAL AID. 655 00:25:58,725 --> 00:26:03,063 UH, THEY COULD JOIN THE ARMY OR THE NAVY. 656 00:26:03,104 --> 00:26:06,566 YOU'RE WHAT, LIKE, 12? 657 00:26:10,236 --> 00:26:14,074 THE PRINCIPAL TOLD ME THAT 90% OF SCOTT'S TOTS 658 00:26:14,115 --> 00:26:16,701 ARE ON TRACK TO GRADUATE AND THAT'S 35% HIGHER 659 00:26:16,743 --> 00:26:18,161 THAN THE REST OF THE SCHOOL. 660 00:26:18,203 --> 00:26:21,831 SO I THINK THAT IF YOU HADN'T MADE THAT PROMISE, 661 00:26:21,873 --> 00:26:23,416 A LOT OF THEM WOULD'VE DROPPED OUT, 662 00:26:23,458 --> 00:26:28,004 WHICH IS SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT, I THINK. 663 00:26:36,096 --> 00:26:39,057 I THINK YOU'RE DOING A GREAT JOB. 664 00:26:39,099 --> 00:26:43,395 REALLY? 665 00:26:43,436 --> 00:26:44,729 WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM THIS JOB, 666 00:26:44,771 --> 00:26:48,024 PROVIDED THE COMPANY DOESN'T GO OUT OF BUSINESS? 667 00:26:48,066 --> 00:26:49,693 I'VE ALWAYS WONDERED WHAT IT MIGHT BE LIKE 668 00:26:49,734 --> 00:26:51,569 - TO BE AN ACCOUNTANT. - REALLY? 669 00:26:51,611 --> 00:26:54,656 YES. BUT I'M TERRIBLE AT MATH SO... [laughs] 670 00:26:54,698 --> 00:26:56,199 YOU KNOW, WHEN I HIRED KEVIN, 671 00:26:56,241 --> 00:27:00,328 HE WAS ACTUALLY APPLYING FOR A JOB IN THE WAREHOUSE. 672 00:27:00,370 --> 00:27:02,497 - SERIOUSLY? - YEAH. 673 00:27:02,539 --> 00:27:06,918 I JUST SORT OF HAD A FEELING ABOUT HIM. 674 00:27:06,960 --> 00:27:10,213 I HAVE A FEELING ABOUT YOU TOO. 675 00:27:12,757 --> 00:27:15,218 ♪ HEY, MR. SCOTT, WHAT YOU GONNA DO? ♪ 676 00:27:15,260 --> 00:27:18,221 both: * WHAT YOU GONNA DO? MAKE OUR DREAMS COME TRUE ♪ 677 00:27:18,263 --> 00:27:21,141 ♪ HEY, MR. SCOTT, WHAT YOU GONNA DO? ♪ 678 00:27:21,182 --> 00:27:23,143 ♪ WHAT YOU GONNA DO? MAKE OUR DREAMS COME TRUE ♪ 679 00:27:23,184 --> 00:27:24,561 YEAH. 680 00:27:29,024 --> 00:27:32,736 - SEE YOU TOMORROW, DWIGHT. - APPARENTLY. 681 00:27:32,777 --> 00:27:35,572 - HOW'S IT GOING? GOOD DAY? - NOT NOW, TEMP. 682 00:27:35,613 --> 00:27:39,701 UM, OKAY. SO, UM, LISTEN. 683 00:27:39,743 --> 00:27:42,662 I KNOW ABOUT YOUR DIABOLICAL PLAN. 684 00:27:42,704 --> 00:27:47,292 WHAT? DIABOLICAL PLAN? 685 00:27:47,334 --> 00:27:49,044 I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO BEGIN A DIA... 686 00:27:49,085 --> 00:27:52,255 I FOUND A COPY OF IT IN THE COPIER TRAY. 687 00:27:52,297 --> 00:27:53,631 SO WHAT DO YOU WANT? 688 00:27:53,673 --> 00:27:55,592 I WANT THE SAME THING YOU WANT. 689 00:27:55,633 --> 00:27:58,553 I WANT TO TAKE JIM HALPERT DOWN. 690 00:27:58,595 --> 00:28:00,263 I WANT IN. 50160

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