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1
00:00:04,005 --> 00:00:05,451
There. How's that?
2
00:00:05,475 --> 00:00:06,786
Tighter.
3
00:00:06,810 --> 00:00:10,494
Darrin. If I tied it any
tighter, you'd pass out.
4
00:00:10,518 --> 00:00:12,031
I wanna pass out.
5
00:00:12,055 --> 00:00:14,269
It's the merciful thing to do.
6
00:00:14,293 --> 00:00:16,841
I just resent having
to wear a dinner jacket
7
00:00:16,865 --> 00:00:18,578
to eat dinner in my own house,
8
00:00:18,602 --> 00:00:20,816
just to please a
so-called empress.
9
00:00:20,840 --> 00:00:22,320
If it'll make you
feel any better,
10
00:00:22,344 --> 00:00:24,223
she won't be pleased.
11
00:00:24,247 --> 00:00:26,396
She'd rather you wear tails.
12
00:00:26,420 --> 00:00:28,365
And she is an empress
13
00:00:28,389 --> 00:00:32,041
and high priestess of
all witches and warlocks.
14
00:00:32,065 --> 00:00:33,644
That still doesn't
give her the right
15
00:00:33,668 --> 00:00:34,746
to barge into our house
16
00:00:34,770 --> 00:00:37,252
and turn it into
Buckingham Palace.
17
00:00:37,276 --> 00:00:39,590
Well, she'll change it
back when she leaves.
18
00:00:39,614 --> 00:00:41,761
Sweetheart, try to understand.
19
00:00:41,785 --> 00:00:44,100
Uh, redecorating
makes her feel...
20
00:00:44,124 --> 00:00:45,202
more at home.
21
00:00:45,226 --> 00:00:47,662
Where does she
live? The Taj Mahal?
22
00:00:48,733 --> 00:00:50,379
Boy, some nerve.
23
00:00:50,403 --> 00:00:53,353
"I, Hepzibah, will reside
in this house for one week,
24
00:00:53,377 --> 00:00:54,789
"to decide whether or not
25
00:00:54,813 --> 00:00:56,726
"this first and only
mixed marriage
26
00:00:56,750 --> 00:01:00,000
of witch to mortal
should be dissolved."
27
00:01:00,024 --> 00:01:01,025
Blech.
28
00:01:02,597 --> 00:01:05,112
Sam... is this all worth it?
29
00:01:05,136 --> 00:01:07,417
I mean, wouldn't it
be easier if we agreed
30
00:01:07,441 --> 00:01:09,654
you'd go to the witches'
convention by yourself?
31
00:01:09,678 --> 00:01:11,113
Wouldn't that satisfy her?
32
00:01:12,317 --> 00:01:14,565
It would not satisfy me.
33
00:01:14,589 --> 00:01:18,240
If I have to go to Salem to
that dumb witches' convention,
34
00:01:18,264 --> 00:01:20,277
I want you to come with me.
35
00:01:20,301 --> 00:01:21,814
Mommy?
36
00:01:21,838 --> 00:01:24,019
Where did you get that outfit?
37
00:01:24,043 --> 00:01:25,421
Her Majesty.
38
00:01:25,445 --> 00:01:28,595
She said a young lady should
dress properly for dinner.
39
00:01:28,619 --> 00:01:31,534
And a fairy princess
never looked lovelier.
40
00:01:31,558 --> 00:01:34,007
What did she dress Adam
as? Prince Charming?
41
00:01:34,031 --> 00:01:37,414
No. She picked him up
from his crib to play with him,
42
00:01:37,438 --> 00:01:39,117
and he made a no-no on her,
43
00:01:39,141 --> 00:01:41,823
so he's not allowed
to come down at all.
44
00:01:41,847 --> 00:01:44,451
Darn. I wish I had
thought of that.
45
00:01:49,831 --> 00:01:52,335
Well, first call for dinner.
46
00:01:58,917 --> 00:02:02,033
Ex-queen Samantha,
her daughter Tabitha,
47
00:02:02,057 --> 00:02:04,126
and mortal.
48
00:02:07,936 --> 00:02:11,186
Well, come, come.
Din-din is getting cold.
49
00:02:11,210 --> 00:02:12,522
Who are they?
50
00:02:12,546 --> 00:02:14,293
Our servants, of course.
51
00:02:14,317 --> 00:02:17,199
We never travel anywhere
without our servants.
52
00:02:17,223 --> 00:02:19,704
Well, you can tell
your "trumpeteer"
53
00:02:19,728 --> 00:02:22,378
that I have a name and a title:
54
00:02:22,402 --> 00:02:25,384
Darrin Stephens,
master of this house.
55
00:02:25,408 --> 00:02:28,055
Not while we live here.
56
00:02:28,079 --> 00:02:30,661
And for not
remembering your place,
57
00:02:30,685 --> 00:02:34,892
you get... one demerit.
58
00:02:37,467 --> 00:02:41,651
Young man... when
those other nine demerits
59
00:02:41,675 --> 00:02:43,989
are over with
that other demerit,
60
00:02:44,013 --> 00:02:46,818
you will be dissolved.
61
00:02:50,328 --> 00:02:51,506
Uh, come on, sweetheart.
62
00:02:51,530 --> 00:02:55,280
Our, uh, din-din
is getting cold.
63
00:02:55,304 --> 00:02:56,984
"Dissolved?"
64
00:02:57,008 --> 00:02:58,643
Shh.
65
00:03:59,810 --> 00:04:02,024
Everything looks yummy.
66
00:04:02,048 --> 00:04:04,194
Oh, it looks different. Hm.
67
00:04:04,218 --> 00:04:05,598
What is it?
68
00:04:05,622 --> 00:04:07,536
Oh, pâté of elephant tail,
69
00:04:07,560 --> 00:04:09,941
pickled eye of newt.
70
00:04:09,965 --> 00:04:13,349
Over there is hummingbird
tongue parmigiana.
71
00:04:13,373 --> 00:04:15,619
And here is kidney of iguana
72
00:04:15,643 --> 00:04:18,213
bourguignonne in neat-feet oil.
73
00:04:19,552 --> 00:04:23,203
Well, to be perfectly
honest, uh, Your Highness,
74
00:04:23,227 --> 00:04:24,939
these, ahem,
75
00:04:24,963 --> 00:04:27,679
goodies are a little
exotic for my system.
76
00:04:27,703 --> 00:04:29,582
Ridiculous.
77
00:04:29,606 --> 00:04:31,420
Pâté of elephant tail
78
00:04:31,444 --> 00:04:35,162
is no more exotic
than blueberry pie.
79
00:04:35,186 --> 00:04:39,024
Uh, Darrin's not too crazy
about blueberry pie either.
80
00:04:40,363 --> 00:04:42,811
This is ethnic food.
81
00:04:42,835 --> 00:04:44,882
By refusing to share it with us,
82
00:04:44,906 --> 00:04:49,247
you are insulting an
entire ethnic group.
83
00:04:53,926 --> 00:04:56,440
What do you say to that?
84
00:04:56,464 --> 00:04:58,868
How about the eight
ball in the side pocket?
85
00:04:59,905 --> 00:05:01,485
Another demerit
86
00:05:01,509 --> 00:05:04,613
for that feeble
attempt at humor.
87
00:05:11,530 --> 00:05:14,167
Well, that's three
down, seven to go.
88
00:05:17,009 --> 00:05:18,043
Answer the door.
89
00:05:19,480 --> 00:05:22,697
Well, i-it's no one we
know, uh, Your Majesty.
90
00:05:22,721 --> 00:05:25,502
I-I mean, a friend
would never just drop in
91
00:05:25,526 --> 00:05:27,830
at the dinner hour, uninvited.
92
00:05:30,738 --> 00:05:32,517
And a friend who would drop in
93
00:05:32,541 --> 00:05:35,190
at the dinner hour
isn't much of a friend.
94
00:05:35,214 --> 00:05:37,128
So... who needs him?
95
00:05:37,152 --> 00:05:38,330
We do.
96
00:05:38,354 --> 00:05:40,569
If we are researching
the species,
97
00:05:40,593 --> 00:05:44,878
we would like to meet as
many mortals as possible.
98
00:05:44,902 --> 00:05:46,704
I'll get it.
99
00:05:57,862 --> 00:06:00,544
Hi, Sam. I'm sorry to
barge in at dinnertime
100
00:06:00,569 --> 00:06:03,184
but I had to drop these
papers off for Darrin.
101
00:06:03,208 --> 00:06:04,209
And I'd like to...
102
00:06:05,746 --> 00:06:07,994
You're having a costume party...
103
00:06:08,018 --> 00:06:09,798
and you didn't invite me.
104
00:06:09,822 --> 00:06:11,434
Oh! Uh, no, no, Larry.
105
00:06:11,458 --> 00:06:12,704
Uh, we're just entertaining
106
00:06:12,728 --> 00:06:15,042
an aunt of mine who
insists we dress up.
107
00:06:15,066 --> 00:06:16,968
Excuse me.
108
00:06:23,551 --> 00:06:27,803
When, uh, did you redecorate?
109
00:06:27,827 --> 00:06:28,806
Redecorate?
110
00:06:28,830 --> 00:06:30,108
We didn't.
111
00:06:30,132 --> 00:06:31,745
It's my aunt's.
112
00:06:31,769 --> 00:06:34,684
She's very, very
wealthy, and, uh...
113
00:06:34,708 --> 00:06:36,688
a little strange.
114
00:06:36,712 --> 00:06:40,063
A lot strange.
115
00:06:40,087 --> 00:06:42,267
A ding-a-ling?
116
00:06:42,291 --> 00:06:44,137
Samantha...
117
00:06:44,161 --> 00:06:47,478
uh, bring whoever it
is into our presence.
118
00:06:47,502 --> 00:06:49,382
I'd better go. I'll
call you later, Darrin.
119
00:06:49,406 --> 00:06:50,451
No, no. Larry, please.
120
00:06:50,475 --> 00:06:52,178
Uh, just... Just meet her.
121
00:07:00,430 --> 00:07:02,477
Your Majesty, may I present
122
00:07:02,501 --> 00:07:04,304
my business associate, Mr. Tate?
123
00:07:05,942 --> 00:07:07,621
Do I curtsy?
124
00:07:07,645 --> 00:07:09,047
A bow will do.
125
00:07:10,386 --> 00:07:13,768
Nicely done. We are
pleased with this one.
126
00:07:13,792 --> 00:07:15,338
Thank you, Your Highness.
127
00:07:15,362 --> 00:07:17,632
I'm available for knighthood.
128
00:07:23,079 --> 00:07:25,727
Eh, he's a bit of a ding-a-ling.
129
00:07:25,751 --> 00:07:26,829
Heh.
130
00:07:26,853 --> 00:07:28,233
Uh, Darrin, I'm
sorry to barge in
131
00:07:28,257 --> 00:07:29,836
on this little dinner
party of yours,
132
00:07:29,860 --> 00:07:31,005
but I had to talk to you
133
00:07:31,029 --> 00:07:32,976
before we meet with
Hitchcock in the morning.
134
00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:35,603
Oh. Sit down and join us.
135
00:07:36,575 --> 00:07:39,490
Oh, I... I'd be honored,
but, uh, actually,
136
00:07:39,514 --> 00:07:42,229
I'm joining my wife
at the club for dinner.
137
00:07:42,253 --> 00:07:43,531
Oh, and you know how Louise
138
00:07:43,556 --> 00:07:44,734
hates to be kept waiting.
139
00:07:44,758 --> 00:07:46,205
So why don't you just run along?
140
00:07:46,229 --> 00:07:47,807
But, uh, I, heh,
141
00:07:47,831 --> 00:07:49,846
could have an hors
d'oeuvre or two.
142
00:07:49,870 --> 00:07:51,082
Postlethwaite.
143
00:07:51,106 --> 00:07:52,452
It certainly looks delicious.
144
00:07:52,476 --> 00:07:54,322
Don't bother, Postlethwaite.
145
00:07:54,346 --> 00:07:55,724
I'm full.
146
00:07:55,748 --> 00:07:56,961
As you were.
147
00:07:56,985 --> 00:07:58,865
Thank you. Mm.
148
00:07:58,889 --> 00:07:59,890
Mmm.
149
00:08:02,096 --> 00:08:03,363
Mmm.
150
00:08:06,171 --> 00:08:07,616
It is delicious.
151
00:08:07,640 --> 00:08:09,989
I mean, really delicious.
152
00:08:10,013 --> 00:08:13,330
I never tasted anything
like it. What is it?
153
00:08:13,354 --> 00:08:15,489
It's a secret family recipe.
154
00:08:17,028 --> 00:08:20,211
So, uh... Uh, Hitchcock is coming
to the office tomorrow, right?
155
00:08:20,235 --> 00:08:22,548
Mm.
156
00:08:22,572 --> 00:08:25,154
I can taste the parmigiana,
but I can't make out...
157
00:08:25,178 --> 00:08:26,613
The hummingbird tongue?
158
00:08:29,254 --> 00:08:31,022
The what?
159
00:08:33,128 --> 00:08:35,877
That's very amusing,
Your Highness.
160
00:08:35,901 --> 00:08:37,102
Oh, funny, huh?
161
00:08:39,476 --> 00:08:41,823
We have heard of
hummingbird tongue
162
00:08:41,847 --> 00:08:44,752
being tasty, but never amusing.
163
00:08:47,726 --> 00:08:51,745
Tabitha, are you enjoying
your hummingbird tongue?
164
00:08:51,769 --> 00:08:54,205
I like the pickled
eye of newt better.
165
00:08:55,410 --> 00:08:57,646
The pickled... Eye of newt.
166
00:09:00,754 --> 00:09:03,170
Uh, listen...
167
00:09:03,194 --> 00:09:05,074
I hate to eat
and run, but, uh...
168
00:09:05,098 --> 00:09:07,446
Run, run. Heh.
Louise is waiting.
169
00:09:07,470 --> 00:09:08,948
Oh, I'll see you in the morning.
170
00:09:08,972 --> 00:09:11,087
It's been an honor
meeting you, Your Highness.
171
00:09:11,111 --> 00:09:12,089
And, uh, don't get up.
172
00:09:12,113 --> 00:09:14,382
I think I can find my way out.
173
00:09:19,228 --> 00:09:21,542
At least the creature
was man enough
174
00:09:21,566 --> 00:09:23,301
to give it a try.
175
00:09:29,583 --> 00:09:31,363
I don't know how much
longer I can take it.
176
00:09:31,387 --> 00:09:32,666
Don't worry, sweetheart.
177
00:09:32,690 --> 00:09:35,204
Just a few more days,
and it'll all be over.
178
00:09:35,228 --> 00:09:36,729
Well... the way I'm...
179
00:09:37,968 --> 00:09:40,984
piling up demerits, it
could be all over today.
180
00:09:41,008 --> 00:09:42,687
I'd better get along.
181
00:09:42,711 --> 00:09:44,313
Where?
182
00:09:46,620 --> 00:09:48,600
To work.
183
00:09:48,624 --> 00:09:50,637
That interests us.
184
00:09:50,661 --> 00:09:52,574
What is "work"?
185
00:09:52,598 --> 00:09:55,515
That's a very good
question, Your Majesty.
186
00:09:55,539 --> 00:09:58,588
And Samantha is just
the person to explain it.
187
00:09:58,612 --> 00:10:01,750
See you later, honey.
Uh, by your leave.
188
00:10:05,627 --> 00:10:07,273
What is "work"?
189
00:10:07,297 --> 00:10:10,947
Oh, that's what
mortals do from 9 to 5.
190
00:10:10,971 --> 00:10:13,675
You will explain while
we have our breakfast.
191
00:10:15,347 --> 00:10:16,848
Quickly, Penelope.
192
00:10:18,588 --> 00:10:19,721
Naughty, naughty.
193
00:10:30,547 --> 00:10:32,583
Once over lightly.
194
00:10:34,288 --> 00:10:35,634
Repeat.
195
00:10:35,658 --> 00:10:38,574
What is "work"?
196
00:10:38,598 --> 00:10:42,983
Well, in Darrin's
case, it's advertising.
197
00:10:43,007 --> 00:10:45,788
What is advertising?
198
00:10:45,812 --> 00:10:47,381
Advertising is...
199
00:10:48,753 --> 00:10:51,301
Well... After breakfast,
200
00:10:51,325 --> 00:10:53,539
you will take us
to his workshop.
201
00:10:53,563 --> 00:10:56,746
Oh, uh... but I-I
couldn't take us there.
202
00:10:56,770 --> 00:10:59,352
I-I mean, he's very busy.
203
00:10:59,376 --> 00:11:01,824
If we have time to watch him,
204
00:11:01,848 --> 00:11:04,429
then he will make
time to be watched.
205
00:11:04,453 --> 00:11:07,068
But I couldn't possibly
leave the house.
206
00:11:07,092 --> 00:11:08,828
I don't have a babysitter.
207
00:11:11,903 --> 00:11:13,504
You do now.
208
00:11:15,778 --> 00:11:17,713
Y... Yes, uh, Your Majesty.
209
00:11:28,438 --> 00:11:29,639
Morning.
210
00:11:30,710 --> 00:11:32,221
It's almost noon.
211
00:11:32,246 --> 00:11:34,226
I know.
212
00:11:34,250 --> 00:11:35,764
I had a great night's sleep.
213
00:11:35,788 --> 00:11:38,558
One hour, from 10:00
this morning to 11.
214
00:11:40,029 --> 00:11:43,178
Did I eat hummingbird
tongue last night, or didn't I?
215
00:11:43,202 --> 00:11:45,884
Larry, will you please
forget last night?
216
00:11:45,908 --> 00:11:48,023
Uh, Hitchcock will
be here any minute.
217
00:11:48,047 --> 00:11:50,629
Now, let's go over
the presentation.
218
00:11:50,653 --> 00:11:52,866
What's pickled eye of newt?
219
00:11:52,890 --> 00:11:55,305
Uh, it's kind of a squash...
220
00:11:55,329 --> 00:11:56,809
prepared with a sauce.
221
00:11:56,833 --> 00:11:59,068
It is? Because I love squash.
222
00:12:01,209 --> 00:12:02,453
Hello.
223
00:12:02,477 --> 00:12:05,359
Uh, we didn't have
a chance to call.
224
00:12:05,383 --> 00:12:06,962
Uh, Aunt Hepzibah
225
00:12:06,986 --> 00:12:08,833
wanted to come and
see where you work.
226
00:12:08,857 --> 00:12:10,192
Carry on.
227
00:12:15,906 --> 00:12:17,319
L-look, uh...
228
00:12:17,343 --> 00:12:20,859
Uh, Your Majesty,
we're really very busy.
229
00:12:20,883 --> 00:12:25,458
Good. Then we shall
observe "busyness."
230
00:12:26,463 --> 00:12:28,710
Sam, would you please try
231
00:12:28,734 --> 00:12:30,680
to explain to Her Highness
232
00:12:30,704 --> 00:12:33,554
that we're expecting a
very important client?
233
00:12:33,578 --> 00:12:35,191
Larry said they're expecting...
234
00:12:35,215 --> 00:12:37,730
We do not need a translation.
235
00:12:37,754 --> 00:12:39,889
Yes, ma'am.
236
00:12:42,463 --> 00:12:44,010
Yes?
237
00:12:44,034 --> 00:12:45,614
Hitchcock is here.
238
00:12:45,638 --> 00:12:46,782
Tell him to wait.
239
00:12:46,806 --> 00:12:48,508
Send him in.
240
00:12:49,746 --> 00:12:52,327
I've got a great
idea, Your Majesty.
241
00:12:52,351 --> 00:12:54,031
Why don't you visit
the United Nations?
242
00:12:54,055 --> 00:12:56,837
You can meet a lot of
kings and presidents.
243
00:12:56,861 --> 00:12:58,395
Send him in.
244
00:12:59,934 --> 00:13:01,234
Send him in.
245
00:13:02,506 --> 00:13:05,890
Uh, look, Your Majesty...
246
00:13:05,914 --> 00:13:08,194
uh, Mr. Hitchcock
is a very busy man,
247
00:13:08,218 --> 00:13:09,898
an-and busy men are sometimes
248
00:13:09,922 --> 00:13:11,635
very brusque and impatient.
249
00:13:11,659 --> 00:13:13,673
He might say
something to insult you.
250
00:13:13,697 --> 00:13:16,935
We hope not, for his sake.
251
00:13:18,340 --> 00:13:19,853
Oh. Good to see
you, Mr. Hitchcock.
252
00:13:19,877 --> 00:13:21,221
Uh, Tate. Mr. Hitchcock.
253
00:13:21,245 --> 00:13:22,792
Stephens.
254
00:13:22,816 --> 00:13:25,565
Oh, uh, may I present
my wife, Samantha?
255
00:13:25,589 --> 00:13:26,868
How do you do?
256
00:13:26,892 --> 00:13:29,138
And her Aunt Hepzibah
visiting from out of town.
257
00:13:29,162 --> 00:13:30,230
Ladies.
258
00:13:31,836 --> 00:13:33,448
I've got exactly 25 minutes
259
00:13:33,472 --> 00:13:34,852
before we go to lunch, Stephens.
260
00:13:34,876 --> 00:13:36,289
Shall we get on with it?
261
00:13:36,313 --> 00:13:38,660
Yes, let's get on with it.
I-in the conference room.
262
00:13:38,684 --> 00:13:40,686
Uh, that won't be necessary.
263
00:13:42,091 --> 00:13:45,041
We are very comfortable here.
264
00:13:45,065 --> 00:13:46,911
Is this some sort
of a joke, Tate?
265
00:13:46,935 --> 00:13:48,514
Heh-heh. Well, uh... Ha.
266
00:13:48,538 --> 00:13:51,621
Well, my aunt i...
Was rather interested
267
00:13:51,645 --> 00:13:54,093
in studying the
world of business.
268
00:13:54,117 --> 00:13:55,529
Perhaps it's not my place
269
00:13:55,553 --> 00:13:57,222
to say this, madam, but, uh...
270
00:14:02,568 --> 00:14:05,205
You're a most attractive woman.
271
00:14:06,778 --> 00:14:09,092
And I cannot imagine
you being interested
272
00:14:09,116 --> 00:14:11,129
in anything as dull as business.
273
00:14:11,153 --> 00:14:13,601
How very gallant, Mr. Hitchcock.
274
00:14:13,625 --> 00:14:15,906
Ernest, please. I beg you.
275
00:14:15,930 --> 00:14:18,078
Well, shall we get
started, Mr. Hitchcock?
276
00:14:18,102 --> 00:14:20,482
Uh, there are
ladies present, Tate.
277
00:14:20,506 --> 00:14:23,288
Let's chat a while, hm?
278
00:14:23,313 --> 00:14:25,193
Hepzibah.
279
00:14:25,217 --> 00:14:26,428
Hepzibah.
280
00:14:26,452 --> 00:14:28,867
What a lovely name. Biblical?
281
00:14:28,891 --> 00:14:30,871
Hardly.
282
00:14:30,895 --> 00:14:34,613
So you're from out of town.
Where, may I ask, my dear?
283
00:14:34,637 --> 00:14:37,275
Oh! She's lived all over.
284
00:14:38,346 --> 00:14:39,623
Yes. Uh, Mr. Hitchcock, if...
285
00:14:39,647 --> 00:14:41,795
If you'll take a look at
the pre... Presentation...
286
00:14:41,819 --> 00:14:43,699
As soon as I can
take my eyes off
287
00:14:43,723 --> 00:14:46,627
this lovely and incredibly
beautiful creature.
288
00:14:48,033 --> 00:14:50,046
So you're a world traveler.
289
00:14:50,070 --> 00:14:52,017
Perhaps you've used my airlines.
290
00:14:52,041 --> 00:14:54,410
The regal bird with
the silver beak?
291
00:14:56,283 --> 00:14:58,620
We are pleased with this man.
292
00:14:59,891 --> 00:15:01,994
He has quality.
293
00:15:03,198 --> 00:15:05,579
Uh, the feeling is mutual.
294
00:15:05,603 --> 00:15:07,083
Perhaps we can
discuss it at lunch.
295
00:15:07,107 --> 00:15:08,419
Delighted.
296
00:15:08,443 --> 00:15:10,891
The thing is, I only made
a reservation at Pavillon
297
00:15:10,915 --> 00:15:11,893
for you and Darrin.
298
00:15:11,917 --> 00:15:13,196
They're booked solid.
299
00:15:13,220 --> 00:15:14,798
How fortunate for us, Hepzibah.
300
00:15:14,823 --> 00:15:15,902
We shall dine alone then.
301
00:15:15,926 --> 00:15:16,992
Oh! Come along.
302
00:15:18,164 --> 00:15:19,309
We'll see you after lunch.
303
00:15:19,333 --> 00:15:21,713
Your Majesty.
304
00:15:21,737 --> 00:15:23,051
Have you ever been to Crete?
305
00:15:23,075 --> 00:15:24,576
Not for centuries.
306
00:15:27,484 --> 00:15:28,485
What...?
307
00:15:29,822 --> 00:15:31,602
What...?
308
00:15:31,626 --> 00:15:33,628
What happened?
309
00:15:38,273 --> 00:15:39,419
How could you do it, Sam?
310
00:15:39,443 --> 00:15:40,588
How could you do it?
311
00:15:40,612 --> 00:15:42,960
We... Well, I-I didn't
have any choice.
312
00:15:42,984 --> 00:15:44,028
I mean, if Mr. Hitchcock
313
00:15:44,052 --> 00:15:46,501
had said one rude
word to Hepzibah...
314
00:15:46,525 --> 00:15:48,037
And he was about to
315
00:15:48,061 --> 00:15:49,741
why, she would've zapped him
316
00:15:49,765 --> 00:15:51,545
into an aardvark or something.
317
00:15:51,569 --> 00:15:52,747
But I wouldn't have minded
318
00:15:52,771 --> 00:15:54,651
your turning him
into Mr. Nice Guy,
319
00:15:54,675 --> 00:15:57,023
but a lovesick
adolescent is overdoing it.
320
00:15:57,047 --> 00:15:59,817
I didn't have
time for subtleties.
321
00:16:00,988 --> 00:16:02,357
Rowr!
322
00:16:05,064 --> 00:16:06,633
We are home.
323
00:16:08,071 --> 00:16:11,254
We are pleased to say we
have come to the conclusion
324
00:16:11,278 --> 00:16:13,826
that as a lower form of life,
325
00:16:13,850 --> 00:16:17,701
some mortals are
not without charm.
326
00:16:17,725 --> 00:16:19,237
Sweetheart.
327
00:16:19,261 --> 00:16:20,941
Had you but an ounce
328
00:16:20,965 --> 00:16:22,912
of Ernest's exquisite taste,
329
00:16:22,936 --> 00:16:26,854
you might be barely tolerable.
330
00:16:26,878 --> 00:16:28,523
Well, if we're playing
the truth game,
331
00:16:28,547 --> 00:16:30,361
let me tell you something.
332
00:16:30,385 --> 00:16:34,337
For raising your voice to us...
333
00:16:34,361 --> 00:16:35,894
another demerit.
334
00:16:37,066 --> 00:16:40,115
Another demerit.
Another demerit.
335
00:16:40,139 --> 00:16:41,919
I might as well
go for the jackpot.
336
00:16:41,943 --> 00:16:44,725
I want you out of my house.
337
00:16:44,749 --> 00:16:47,999
And your puppy dogs
and your servants.
338
00:16:48,023 --> 00:16:49,402
Out.
339
00:16:49,426 --> 00:16:51,373
You may be the
almighty of all witches,
340
00:16:51,397 --> 00:16:53,612
but to me, you're an
almighty pain in the...
341
00:16:53,636 --> 00:16:54,637
Darrin!
342
00:16:55,806 --> 00:16:59,390
Uh, he-he-he... He apo...
Apologizes, Your Majesty.
343
00:16:59,414 --> 00:17:00,593
Apologize.
344
00:17:00,617 --> 00:17:04,434
It is too late for
you to apologize.
345
00:17:04,458 --> 00:17:08,710
You have used
up your demerits...
346
00:17:08,734 --> 00:17:11,483
and our patience.
347
00:17:11,507 --> 00:17:14,221
The marriage will be
dissolved at midnight.
348
00:17:14,245 --> 00:17:17,217
But... But... Go to your room.
349
00:17:21,962 --> 00:17:24,744
"The marriage will be
dissolved at midnight."
350
00:17:24,768 --> 00:17:26,548
Boy, some nerve.
351
00:17:26,572 --> 00:17:29,221
I mean, how could she
dissolve our marriage?
352
00:17:29,245 --> 00:17:31,659
How? I'd just like to know how.
353
00:17:31,683 --> 00:17:33,897
She could turn you
into an ex-husband.
354
00:17:33,921 --> 00:17:36,337
How? I'd just like to know how.
355
00:17:36,361 --> 00:17:38,341
By dissolving you.
356
00:17:38,365 --> 00:17:40,099
Now I know how.
357
00:17:44,711 --> 00:17:46,524
Don't worry, sweetheart.
358
00:17:46,548 --> 00:17:48,796
I'll just talk her into
drumming me out
359
00:17:48,820 --> 00:17:50,132
of the witch world.
360
00:17:50,156 --> 00:17:51,135
Uh, what does that mean?
361
00:17:51,159 --> 00:17:52,738
Well, how should I know?
362
00:17:52,762 --> 00:17:55,944
Uh, she'll probably recite
some mumbo jumbo and zap,
363
00:17:55,968 --> 00:17:57,915
I'll be just plain folks.
364
00:17:57,939 --> 00:18:00,421
Then it's none of her
business what I do.
365
00:18:00,445 --> 00:18:02,392
And?
366
00:18:02,416 --> 00:18:05,065
Well, I don't know. It's
never been done before. I...
367
00:18:05,089 --> 00:18:06,790
I suppose I'd lose my powers.
368
00:18:08,061 --> 00:18:09,674
Sam, I won't let you do it.
369
00:18:09,698 --> 00:18:11,345
Isn't that what you've
always wanted?
370
00:18:11,369 --> 00:18:13,315
Yes. No.
371
00:18:13,339 --> 00:18:17,156
I mean... I love you
for what you are.
372
00:18:17,180 --> 00:18:18,360
Well, I'd still be what I am.
373
00:18:18,384 --> 00:18:21,600
I... I just wouldn't
have my powers.
374
00:18:21,624 --> 00:18:22,702
But that's a part of you.
375
00:18:22,726 --> 00:18:24,806
And I won't let you give it up.
376
00:18:24,830 --> 00:18:27,678
I won't let anything or
anybody change you
377
00:18:27,703 --> 00:18:28,948
or dissolve our marriage.
378
00:18:28,972 --> 00:18:31,287
Including the High
Priestess Hepzibah.
379
00:18:31,311 --> 00:18:33,158
And I'll get down on
my knees if I have to,
380
00:18:33,182 --> 00:18:35,952
but I won't stop until
she accepts my apology.
381
00:18:39,762 --> 00:18:40,996
Come on.
382
00:18:43,871 --> 00:18:45,773
Ernest. You are so amusing.
383
00:18:52,557 --> 00:18:53,734
Mr. Hitchcock.
384
00:18:53,758 --> 00:18:55,806
This is a private audience.
385
00:18:55,830 --> 00:18:56,808
Oh. Please, forgive me
386
00:18:56,832 --> 00:18:58,144
for dropping in unannounced,
387
00:18:58,168 --> 00:18:59,481
but I didn't want to lose touch
388
00:18:59,505 --> 00:19:00,917
with this lovely lady.
389
00:19:00,941 --> 00:19:02,721
And she's going
away, and she won't
390
00:19:02,745 --> 00:19:04,725
tell me where she's going.
391
00:19:04,749 --> 00:19:06,463
Isn't it sweet?
392
00:19:06,487 --> 00:19:08,801
She'll be leaving for
Salem in a few days.
393
00:19:08,825 --> 00:19:09,992
Samantha.
394
00:19:11,130 --> 00:19:14,313
Ah. Salem is beautiful
this time of the year.
395
00:19:14,337 --> 00:19:17,285
Ernest, we are touched
by your devotion...
396
00:19:17,309 --> 00:19:20,582
but, really, we will have
so little time to give you.
397
00:19:22,420 --> 00:19:26,606
I'll be staying at the
Hawthorne Hotel. And you?
398
00:19:26,630 --> 00:19:28,365
We will be...
399
00:19:30,672 --> 00:19:32,841
Calling you when we are free.
400
00:19:34,280 --> 00:19:36,593
Good night, beautiful creature.
401
00:19:36,617 --> 00:19:37,886
Good night.
402
00:19:40,827 --> 00:19:42,039
Goodbye.
403
00:19:42,063 --> 00:19:44,065
- Mr. Hitchcock.
- Bye.
404
00:19:47,642 --> 00:19:50,289
Mortals can sometimes
be endearing.
405
00:19:50,313 --> 00:19:53,396
They can grow on one.
406
00:19:53,420 --> 00:19:56,136
Perhaps we have been too rash.
407
00:19:56,160 --> 00:19:59,377
Perhaps we should study
the species a while longer
408
00:19:59,401 --> 00:20:02,571
before passing
any major decision.
409
00:20:05,847 --> 00:20:10,054
The "dissolvement" of
the marriage is canceled.
410
00:20:11,225 --> 00:20:14,408
Oh. Thank you, Your Majesty.
411
00:20:14,432 --> 00:20:18,450
A-and Darrin, uh,
can come to Salem?
412
00:20:18,474 --> 00:20:20,510
Out of the question. No mortal.
413
00:20:22,049 --> 00:20:26,366
You mean... You mean,
Ernest is one of us?
414
00:20:26,390 --> 00:20:31,713
And Darrin Stephens
may come to Salem.
415
00:20:31,737 --> 00:20:33,137
Touché, my dear.
416
00:20:34,909 --> 00:20:36,555
But remember this:
417
00:20:36,579 --> 00:20:38,159
There is a vast difference
418
00:20:38,183 --> 00:20:42,390
between playing with a
mortal and marrying it.
419
00:20:43,561 --> 00:20:47,145
With all due respect,
Your Majesty...
420
00:20:47,169 --> 00:20:49,538
don't knock it
till you've tried it.
421
00:20:59,896 --> 00:21:04,148
Prepare the ancestral
grounds for our arrival.
422
00:21:04,172 --> 00:21:06,152
Away.
423
00:21:06,176 --> 00:21:09,047
You too, Caesar and Cleopatra.
424
00:21:10,920 --> 00:21:13,167
Now... Now, now,
now, now. None of that.
425
00:21:13,191 --> 00:21:14,826
Mommy will be along any moment.
426
00:21:19,873 --> 00:21:21,217
Your Majesty, uh,
427
00:21:21,241 --> 00:21:23,222
if your arm isn't too
tired from waving,
428
00:21:23,246 --> 00:21:24,927
uh, we'd certainly
appreciate having
429
00:21:24,951 --> 00:21:26,262
the house back the way it was.
430
00:21:26,286 --> 00:21:29,770
Nonsense. It is our gift to you.
431
00:21:29,794 --> 00:21:32,208
Well, Your Majesty, we
really don't deserve it.
432
00:21:32,232 --> 00:21:34,513
I mean, after the
trouble we've caused you.
433
00:21:34,537 --> 00:21:35,538
Quite right.
434
00:21:38,812 --> 00:21:39,980
Ugh.
435
00:21:41,051 --> 00:21:44,156
Well... we will be on our way.
436
00:21:45,260 --> 00:21:48,108
Take care of our Samantha.
437
00:21:48,132 --> 00:21:50,636
We're warning you.
438
00:21:54,581 --> 00:21:58,587
Hepzibah will be watching.
439
00:22:02,297 --> 00:22:04,511
Terrific. How could she know
440
00:22:04,535 --> 00:22:06,103
my mother gave us that?
441
00:22:13,020 --> 00:22:14,032
Larry!
442
00:22:14,056 --> 00:22:16,202
Sam. Darrin, heh.
443
00:22:16,226 --> 00:22:18,106
Uh, forgive me for
dropping in unannounced,
444
00:22:18,131 --> 00:22:19,776
but, uh, I was on
my way to the office,
445
00:22:19,800 --> 00:22:20,879
and I just dropped by to...
446
00:22:20,903 --> 00:22:23,051
What happened to
your redecorating?
447
00:22:23,075 --> 00:22:25,957
Uh, well, uh, A-Aunt
Hepzibah turned out
448
00:22:25,982 --> 00:22:27,227
to be an Indian giver.
449
00:22:27,251 --> 00:22:29,999
When she left, she took
Windsor Castle with her.
450
00:22:30,023 --> 00:22:31,669
So we... We just
brought the other stuff
451
00:22:31,693 --> 00:22:33,206
down from the attic.
452
00:22:33,230 --> 00:22:35,143
Oh.
453
00:22:35,167 --> 00:22:37,103
Darrin, how did you manage it?
454
00:22:38,173 --> 00:22:39,252
Well, we, uh...
455
00:22:39,276 --> 00:22:40,755
We got a couple of
moving men, and...
456
00:22:40,779 --> 00:22:42,626
I mean, how did you
manage to talk Hitchcock
457
00:22:42,650 --> 00:22:44,897
into going to Salem with you?
458
00:22:44,921 --> 00:22:47,993
Oh, that. I'd rather
not talk about it, Larry.
459
00:22:50,165 --> 00:22:51,779
Then you tell me, Sam.
460
00:22:51,803 --> 00:22:53,571
The genius is so modest.
461
00:22:54,810 --> 00:22:56,388
Well, all... All right.
462
00:22:56,412 --> 00:23:00,230
The "genius" said to himself:
463
00:23:00,254 --> 00:23:03,470
"What would Larry do
if he were in my place?"
464
00:23:03,494 --> 00:23:04,907
Good, good.
465
00:23:04,931 --> 00:23:06,877
And when he saw Mr. Hitchcock
466
00:23:06,901 --> 00:23:08,783
making eyes at Hepzibah, well...
467
00:23:08,807 --> 00:23:09,885
Yeah, yeah?
468
00:23:09,909 --> 00:23:11,955
He decided to play matchmaker.
469
00:23:11,979 --> 00:23:14,349
You son of a gun.
470
00:23:19,629 --> 00:23:21,097
What happened to the vase?
471
00:23:22,635 --> 00:23:24,215
Well, it, uh...
472
00:23:24,239 --> 00:23:27,155
It broke when we were
moving things back.
473
00:23:27,179 --> 00:23:29,226
It's easily replaced. Hm.
474
00:23:29,250 --> 00:23:31,698
Oh. Well, I... I'd better run.
475
00:23:31,722 --> 00:23:33,101
I'm late for an appointment.
476
00:23:33,125 --> 00:23:34,226
Bye-bye.
477
00:23:44,649 --> 00:23:46,818
"Hepzibah will be watching."
478
00:23:57,210 --> 00:23:58,523
Oh, just one more thing.
479
00:23:58,547 --> 00:23:59,591
If you need me in Salem
480
00:23:59,615 --> 00:24:01,695
to help with
Hitchcock, feel free.
481
00:24:01,719 --> 00:24:03,455
Oh, well... Yeah. Heh-heh.
482
00:24:11,607 --> 00:24:14,345
The vase. What happened?
483
00:24:16,418 --> 00:24:17,396
Well, um...
484
00:24:17,420 --> 00:24:19,601
I told you it was
easily replaced.
485
00:24:19,625 --> 00:24:21,125
Oh.
486
00:24:29,079 --> 00:24:30,723
Uh, just one more thing.
487
00:24:30,747 --> 00:24:32,996
Uh, what about the
spell on Hitchcock?
488
00:24:33,020 --> 00:24:34,699
Oh, I'll fix that.
489
00:24:34,723 --> 00:24:36,994
After we get back from Salem.
33541
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