All language subtitles for The.Sarah.Jane.Adventures.S01E01.Revenge.of.the.Slitheen.Part.1.1080p.MAX.WEB-DL.DDP2.0.H.264-DarkSaber_track3_[eng]

My name's Maria Jackson,

and this is Bannerman Road.

I've just moved in
with my dad after he
and my mum got divorced.

Oh, right, on the brush.

You've got some on your face.

There, just there.

(LAUGHING)

Then, in this big old house
over the road,

I met Sarah Jane Smith.

She's a journalist

who investigates aliens.

That's Luke.

Born yesterday, near enough.

Sarah Jane's adopted him,

and together,
we saved the world.

I discovered that life
was so much bigger
and stranger and better...

-Oi!
-...than I ever thought
possible.

Thank you.

Don't do anything
I wouldn't do.

But when school began,
I thought things
might go back to normal.

(INDISTINCT TALKING)

I was wrong.

They just got weirder

and weirder

and weirder.

(SCREAMS)

Now,

you take care. Okay?

Goodbye, Mum.

Oh, don't think so.
No, Sarah Jane,
that's just fine.

Oh, hi, Maria.

(STUDENTS LAUGH)

Why were they laughing?

First day, and your mum's
kissing you goodbye?

Is that bad?

Bit embarrassing.
Plus, she so wants you
to call her Mum.

She said she didn't.

It's not what she said.

That's a bit flashy.

It's a brand new building.

There was an article about it
in the paper.

Hmm. Wonder what's inside it?

-BLAKEMAN: Not them.
-(MACHINE BEEPING)

BLAKEMAN: Scan along.
MAN: Where is he?

(MACHINE BEEPING)

BLAKEMAN: There! Him.

MAN: He's not that big.

MAN: How will I fit?
BLAKEMAN: He'll do.

BLAKEMAN: Get yourself ready.

I'll go fetch.

What can I do for you, then?

You stand right there, Tim.

Any particular reason?

Very particular.

(FARTS) Oops.

Happens to us all.

And I'll need those.

Sorry?

Oh!

(SCREAMS)

(CLANKING)

(INDISTINCT TALKING)

I'm feeling anxious.

-So am I.
-But you've been to school
before.

Not this one.

Budge up.

You new today?

Yeah. Maria.

Clyde. New, too.

Probably hang around
with you till I meet
some cooler people.

How do you do? I'm Luke Smith.

Okay, that was a joke.
Now I mean it.

Good morning, everybody!

ALL: Good morning,
Mr Blakeman.

-Oh. (FARTS)
-(STUDENTS LAUGHING)

What's funny?

The wife gave me cabbage
and bean tartlets last night.

Yet another reason
to despise Jamie Oliver.

(NECK CRACKING) Right,

assembly, yada-ya.

Uh, welcome back everybody,
it's a new year,
hope you all do well.

Don't run in the courtyard,
don't even think
of wearing any makeup

and study hard,

because I guarantee
none of you
are gonna be pop stars.

What's his problem?

So, uh, what else?

(FARTS)

Oh, yeah. (FARTS)

What a bright future
you've all got,
children of the world!

-(CHUCKLES)
-Etcetera.

Right, as you've seen,
we have
a new technology block.

I'll be taking you over
in groups to look
at our amazing new facilities,

starting with

Form 10B.

(STUDENTS GROANING)

There are 16 classrooms
with broadband connections,

but anything dubious
your adolescent minds
may be drawn to,

I have locked out.

I've signed us up for this.
The first meeting's tomorrow.

Lunchtime science club?

And now I'm backing away.

-(FARTS) Shut up!
-(STUDENTS GROAN)

Why is farting funny?

It just is.

But it's a normal process
of the human bowel.

Are you for real?

Smells weird in here.

Farts?

Don't know. Metal, electric.

Like batteries.

(SNIFFS)

-Can I sit here?
-Only if I'm not gonna
shame you.

Well, I either sit here
with you or sit there...

-Ow!
-...with that.

What, there's someone
worse than me?

-Just.
-(LAUGHS)

-So where are you from?
-Hounslow.

My parents split up,
so I moved down here with Mum.

Like me. Only I moved here
with my dad.

Yeah, how's that?

Better than them
rowing all the time.

Yeah.

Ow!

What's wrong with that?

It's mouldy!

What kind of slop
are they serving here?

Is it leftovers from last term
or something?

-Sir? Sir?
-What?

How am I meant to eat that?

Just pick the bad bits off.

Great.

That leaves me with a pea.

Mine's off, too.
That is disgusting!

What's wrong with this place?

It stinks, the food's rotten.

Something weird's
going on here.

Goodbye,

repellent pubescents.

-Until tomorrow.
-This skin,

it's killing me
round the legs.

Right. Time for a test run.

Now? What about the caretaker?

I've taken care
of the caretaker.

Everything's ready. Come on!

Oh, I see,
you've cadged a lift,
have you?

I offered.

I don't know, Lady Muck,

getting neighbours
to chauffeur her around.

Shut up, Dad.

How was the big first day,
then?

Mmm. Okay.

A bit weird, though.
The headmaster keeps farting.

Really? What,
noisy, smelly ones
or silent but deadlies?

-Ew!
-What?

Place stinks like batteries.

And the canteen food was off.

Well, I'll make you
a proper tea.

You go and get changed.

Bye. See you, Maria.

I want a proper tea, too!

Make it yourself!
You might have a chauffeur
but I'm not your cook.

-Oh, whatever.
-Oh, no, forget it,
it's all right.

We'll phone out for a curry.
Can't have you
straining yourself

after your long voyage home,
can we?

-You think you're so funny!
-Yeah.

How do you get like that,
you and Maria?

Always been like that,
don't really think about it.

Anyway, the school
can't be that bad,
they've just built this.

Someone donated the money
and this new technology block
was put up over the holidays.

Looks incredible.

Hold on. I did an IT job
in a school, in the new block
that looks like that.

-Was it built
by Coldfire Construction?
-Yeah.

-Where was that?
-On the other side of town.
St Sheldon's, in Upminster.

Now I think of it,
that place smelt odd.
Sort of metallic.

Anyway, better go.

Stop her ordering
the entire menu.

(CHUCKLES)

Bye!

Systems online.

(ELECTRICITY CRACKLING)

That's it. Now,
synchronise the mega-wattage.

Synchronising mega-watt...

-Eh...
-That one!

-(ELECTRIC SURGE)
-(GASPS)

(WHIMPERING)

Ahh!

I kept making social
mistakes today.

Oh, hang on, I made one, too.

Driving you to school
when it's just
round the corner,

kissing you goodbye.

Oh, we're both new hands
at this.

I don't know anyone
except Maria and Clyde.

Maria's in different classes
to me most of the time.

And Clyde thinks I'm un-cool.

Clyde's not the only kid
in the school.

What if I make more mistakes?

Then you'll never make
the same ones again.

Listen,

anyone is nervous
starting a new school,
a new job.

I've never been a mum before.

Do I have to go?

I could take you out,
teach you here.
I considered it.

But you,

Luke Smith,

you're going to live
a normal life,

as normal a life
as I can give you.

What if I get it wrong again?

It makes me feel

stupid.

Remember,

you saved the world
the day you were born.

Not many people can say that.

No one else can say that.

That's the problem.
Nobody else is like me.

(COMPUTER BEEPING)

-What are you doing?
-Checking up on the firm
who built your new block.

Coldfire Construction.

They started expanding
18 months ago,
contracts all round the world.

Some odd things cropping up.

Now they're putting up
school buildings
all round London.

Well, it makes a change
for me.

Not aliens, is it?

(CHUCKLES)

(ELECTRICITY CRACKLING)

Stabilising!

There!

(CRIES OUT IN FRIGHT)

Only me, come for a gawp.

Alan, this is really
kind of all right!

Thanks, Chrissie,
I really value your opinion.

Don't be sarky.

Is Maria upstairs?

I think it went okay
for her today.

What went okay for her today?

Her first day
at the new school.

That was today?

My mind's just been
all over the place,

stress like
you would not believe.

So why did you come round?

Oh, to see my daughter, Alan.
Do I need another reason?

Oh, um,
while I think about it,

you were gonna give me
that 13.5 tog double duvet?

You know,
only you don't need it,
you've got the single.

Maria, love, it's your mum!

Lights out, London!

(BOTH LAUGHING)

School can't be that bad.

I mean, like I said,
it's a much better
catchment area.

Ooh, I've gotta go, love.

Ivan's taking me to the pub,
it's opera night tonight.

The waiters sing
while you're eating.
(CHUCKLES)

-Oh.
-Great!

There's a torch.

(ALAN SIGHS DEEPLY)

With a flat battery.

I'm not saying anything.
(GIGGLES)

I'll get the candles.

Power cut?

Yes,
Mr Smith's not responding.

The computer just went pfft!

And guess who forgot
to save her work?

I'll just see how long
it's going to be, I can check
the local power grid.

(WATCH BEEPING)

That's impossible.
It never loses power.

Can't lose power.

There we go.

Goes as far as I can see.

Used to happen all the time
when I was a kid.

Always when
there was something good
on the telly.

Remember once it went off
right in the middle
of Manimal. I was distraught.

Weird.
Why is that happening?

-Give them to me!
-No, I can...

No, I'll do it.

(ELECTRICITY SURGES)

What was that?

-(SCREAMS)
-It's destabilising! Hell!

-(BOTH WHIMPERING)
-Turn it off! Turn it off!

Turn it off!

(BOTH EXHALE)

(ON TV) Its long legs...

(WATCH BEEPS)

What?

Weird.

Must be faulty.

Or the same thing
that cut the electric off,
cut this off.

Fantastic! Finally,
every station in the loop
is working,

but the stabiliser cuts out!

I'll work on how to fix it.

You bought those plans
off that Wallarian.
You took his word it worked!

I just need to sort out
the storage problem,

then it'll stabilise, okay?

And until then
I'm stuck here, in this.

Teaching science
on the planet Thick

where they still
haven't worked out
string theory!

Ooh, it chafes!

Oh, shut up! Don't you get it?

We're nearly there!

One more step

and we'll destroy this planet!

(BOTH CHUCKLING DIABOLICALLY)

Science is my first class
today.

Lab 2A, with Mr Jeffrey.

You'll be fine!

See you, then.

Oh, hi.

Oh, not interrupting?

No, no, no.
Just making a start.

Had a much bigger garden
in the old house.

Oh, do you miss it?

Yeah, well,
needs must and all that.

Shame though,
I had a lot of plans
for that old garden.

Just didn't plan
on my wife running off
with a judo instructor.

-You ever been married?
-No. Never found time.

Oh, wise move.

Anyway, sorry.

Oh, yes, I was just wondering,
that school you mentioned
in Upminster. St Sheldon's?

I'm sure I've still got
the plans here somewhere.

Yeah, there we go.

Cost a fortune.
They had broadband installed,
the works.

Where did the money come from?

I don't know, private funding.

What sort of journalist
are you exactly?

Oh, just this and that,
local stories,
nothing exciting.

Maria was saying
you'd travelled
a fair bit?

Could say that, yeah.

What's that bit there?
It's blank.

I never went in.

Coldfire kept that
to themselves,
it was all sealed off.

There's no door.

What, you reckon
they're hiding something,
do you?

Ooh, something mysterious
inside a school.

That would be ridiculous,
wouldn't it?

-Just a bit.
-Do you mind if I keep this?

No.

A transformer is
an electrical device

that changes the voltage
of an alternating current
supply, the AC supply.

Such as your...

Our main's electrical supply.

Anybody know who invented
the first transformer?

-You.
-Faraday.

-Correct.
-Though he didn't know
what he could use it for.

-What?
-Faraday didn't know
what he'd invented.

I've thought about it, too.

You could get rid
of the transformers,

get a better system
and induct power instead.

Just pointing out,
I'm nothing to do with him.

-(ALL LAUGHING)
-Quiet!

-Name?
-Clyde Langer.

Troublemaker. Noted.

Okay.

(ALL TITTERING)

You're cool
because you make trouble.

-Should I make trouble?
-I hear talking!

(SNIFFING)

(MUMBLING)

-What are you doing?
-My pen's run out,
I'm getting a new one.

Let me see that.

(SNIFFS) Oh! What is it?

Cold chip sandwich.

Made it this morning.

Not chancing my life
in that canteen again.

Oi, what you doing?
You can't do that!

You can wait until lunchtime
and use the canteen
like everybody else.

I'll report you for that!

Go on, try it.

(FARTS)

ALL: Oh! (ALL LAUGHING)

(BELL RINGS)

Right. For tomorrow,
1,000 words on transformers!

(ALL GROANING) Oh!

Two thousand!

Oh, it's hopeless, Miss Smith!
Even worse this term.

I believe you had the wiring
in your new block
re-installed.

Didn't do any good.
The computers
keep crashing. And look.

Look at this.

Huh?

Fresh this morning.

Everything goes off.

And there's that smell.
Like batteries.

And this all started
when you got
your new technology block?

Well, doesn't anybody care?
Hasn't anyone tried
to work out what's wrong?

One of the parent governors
raised it at our meeting.

-And?
-Fell off his bike
the next morning.

Three months in traction.

Can't you feel it, Miss Smith?

Like,

a thunderstorm's coming.

Hello, Miss Smith. (LAUGHS)

Incredible knowledge!

This child, Luke Smith,
he must be a freak.

Do you really think
he can help us?

Yes! We'll use him
to solve the storage problem.

A 14-year-old human child?

There's something's strange
about him. These kids stink.

Acne and grease
and coats and crisps.

But he smells

fresh.

-When can you get to him?
-Very soon.

We have a rendezvous.

Welcome
to lunchtime science club.

I had hoped
for a slightly higher turnout,
but never mind.

(DOOR OPENS)

-There's only me.
-Hmm.

And me. Carl.

Luke. Pleased to meet you.

-Hi.
-Carl's the science star
of the school, supposedly.

Though I imagine
he's probably pretty rubbish
compared to you.

Take a look at this.

Now, over the summer,

I've been having
tons of jolly fun
working on a new project.

What do you make of this?

Um...

It's a model
for a giant capacitor system.

And purely theoretical,
of course.

Nobody could possibly build
anything like this
for real.

You designed this?

Yes, I'm wasted here.

-Do you like it?
-It's amazing.

Let me see.

Now, I have a problem.

My purely theoretical problem
is...

-Anyone?
-Don't tell me.

Oh, yeah. With this,
you could store huge amounts
of electrical energy.

But there's a loophole.

Here in the storage,
it wouldn't stabilise.

That's my problem.

Well done. Gold star.

No star.

You went wrong here.

You need to add an equation
into the computer control.

-Yeah?
-I'll take your word for it.

The power stabilises,
all your problems are over.

Yes. All of my problems are...

I don't know
about yours, though.
(CHUCKLES)

And that school
has exactly the same problem
as yours.

So I'm off
to Coldfire Construction.

Do you want me to do anything?

Oh, yeah, have a look round,

see if you can find
where that smell's
coming from.

Okay, see you later.
Good luck!

Who was that, then?

Nobody.

Result!

Yes! That's it!

And he just handed it over!

-(BOTH LAUGHING)
-Hilarious!

Humans, even the clever ones
are stupid!

At last! We will be avenged!

We'll finish this planet
tonight!

MARIA: Someone looks happy!

I had double maths
this afternoon.

Science club was brilliant.

Mr Jeffrey's really nice.

I think
we're gonna be friends.

You don't
make friends with a teacher.

-Why not?
-You just don't.

Anyway, look,
Sarah Jane phoned me,

she wants us to look
inside the new block.

What are you doing?

-Uh...
-We're gonna investigate
the new block.

I left something
in the new block.

What is it with you and her?

I've seen weird people,
I know weird people.

But you two?
You're beyond weird.

Go find
some normal people, then.

Can I help you?

(SIGHS) That's not right.

I want answers.
Where are you from?

London.

The layout of this building
doesn't make any sense.

But where've you been
all your life?

Don't know farting's funny,

you let your mum kiss you
in public.

Where was your last school?

Never been to school before.

-What, your mum taught you
at home?
-No.

And Sarah Jane isn't my mum.

There are 16
classrooms in this building.

Hold on.
So what's Sarah Jane to you?

-She adopted me.
-Why don't you call her Mum?

She doesn't want me to.

But what about your own?

-I haven't got a mum or dad.
-Everybody's got a
mum and dad.

I have a dad, somewhere.

This block measures
about 1,539 metres squared,

so you double that
for both floors.

The area of each room
doesn't add up to that.

So there's an empty space.

Through there!

I think you should go home.

So, what are you saying
about our company, then?

Miss...

Oh, you can call me Janine.

Janine.

I've been reading up,
as much as I could.

And it's not just
these school projects
in London.

You've moved
from country to country,
hiring cheap local labour,

-no questions asked.
-Yes?

At your building in Santiago,

workers refuse to go in.

Food goes off.
Endless technical problems.

Valencia, Paris,
the same story.
And another thing.

The plans for each building
have a large empty area

behind a wall. Why is that?

There's another room,

a secret room. Behind there!

-Okay, I'll tell you this...
-But how do you get inside?

Oh, I'm not getting
through here.

Stop being strange!

Who's that?

Hello?

I know you're in here.

I can smell you.

(SNIFFS)

Oh, a little girl.

Fresh as a daisy.

Sugar and spice
and all things nice.

She really shouldn't
be hanging around school
after home time.

Not when I've got no reason
to hide in this stupid skin
any longer.

(CRACKLING)
(SQUEAKING)

I think that
because these projects
are so far apart,

nobody connects you
with the problems,
so on you go.

I strongly advise you
to leave right now.

If you know
what's good for you.

Is that a threat?

-Yes.
-What?

After all,

why should I hide?

Well, that was
your last chance,
Miss Smith. Be fair.

I did give you fair warning.

(CHUCKLING DIABOLICALLY)

(LAUGHING)

(GRUNTING)

(EXHALES)

(SNORTING)

I am Slitheen!

Oh, I love it when they run!
(LAUGHS)

(SNIFFING)

(LAUGHS)

Your Luke Smith's too clever
by half.

He's right outside!

There's another one.

I'm after her now.

Oh, it feels good
after so long.

Rejoice in your hunt, brother!

I know you're in here,
I can smell you.

Mmm,

what lovely perfume
you're wearing, Miss Smith!

You're positively fragrant!

(LAUGHS)

We are out of here, now.
Come on!

-What?
-Where's Luke?

I know you're out there, girl.

It's only Mr Jeffrey.

And another one! A boy!

You are sad.

Hiding from a teacher.
What's he gonna do?

-Ooh! Give you a detention?
-Come on!

(SNARLS)

Oh, no. Oh, no!

Run! It's no fun
if you don't run!

The smell of human fear,

love it!

Kiddies!

(SNIFFS)

Kiddywinks!

Run as fast as you can,
I'm coming to find you.

(SNARLS)

(CLYDE SCREAMS)

(PANTING)

(SLITHEEN SNARLING)

(MARIA SCREAMS)

It's a door.

And every door
must have a door handle.

About here?

(BANGING)

(ELECTRICITY CRACKLING)

Children, children,
come to me.

(BREATHING HEAVILY)

We've got to get out of here!

We can't.
We need to fight them.

Quick, in here!

(ELECTRICITY CRACKLING)

So, Luke,

how do you like
our little science project?

(GLASS SHATTERING)

So where's Jeffrey?
I heard him.

That's Jeffrey,
that thing chasing us.

Oh, I'll believe it. Why not?

Thanks. Is there a way out
through here?

No. There's no way out.
(FARTS)

Oh, no.

(LAUGHING)

I am a child of the Slitheen
and this is my hunt! (SNARLS)

-Get it open!
-It's locked.

That thing's real, isn't it?

I was wrong, it is aliens.

(WHIMPERING)

SARAH JANE: The outcast
Slitheen family are scavengers

known to infiltrate
low-tech planets

by hiding in the skins
of the dominant
native species.

Mr Smith, I need you!

(HISSING)

CLYDE: Is that a computer?

Turn out the sun.

MARIA:
They've switched off the sun!

SARAH JANE: I told you!
We're going to stop them!

What, the four of us?

With vinegar
in plastic squeezies?

Daddy, you promised
I could do it.

I think an adult better deal
with them this time.