Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,689 --> 00:00:02,551
Please be home.
2
00:00:02,586 --> 00:00:04,931
Please, please, please, please.
3
00:00:04,965 --> 00:00:07,034
[ Phone ringing]
4
00:00:07,068 --> 00:00:08,448
Should I?
5
00:00:08,482 --> 00:00:10,034
Please answer.
6
00:00:10,068 --> 00:00:11,517
I don't know.
7
00:00:11,551 --> 00:00:14,034
Oh. All right.
8
00:00:14,068 --> 00:00:15,413
[ Sneezing]
9
00:00:15,448 --> 00:00:16,517
Hello.
10
00:00:16,551 --> 00:00:18,068
Aunt hilda. I'm so
glad you're home.
11
00:00:18,103 --> 00:00:19,769
I left my history book
on the kitchen counter.
12
00:00:19,793 --> 00:00:20,689
Do you see it?
13
00:00:20,724 --> 00:00:22,551
Yes. It's right here,
where you left it.
14
00:00:22,586 --> 00:00:23,413
Can you send it to me?
15
00:00:23,448 --> 00:00:25,000
Are you alone?
16
00:00:25,034 --> 00:00:25,551
Yes.
17
00:00:25,586 --> 00:00:27,034
Stand back.
18
00:00:27,068 --> 00:00:28,586
[ Sneezing]
19
00:00:28,620 --> 00:00:29,379
Oops.
20
00:00:29,413 --> 00:00:30,241
What happened?
21
00:00:30,275 --> 00:00:31,241
I sneezed.
22
00:00:31,275 --> 00:00:32,137
So where's my book?
23
00:00:32,172 --> 00:00:33,000
I don't know
24
00:00:33,034 --> 00:00:34,965
but I'm sure it will
turn up somewhere.
25
00:00:55,034 --> 00:00:56,517
This is my biggest fan.
26
00:01:01,551 --> 00:01:03,793
I just don't get why they're
making us read 1984?
27
00:01:03,827 --> 00:01:05,758
When orwell got so much wrong.
28
00:01:05,793 --> 00:01:06,872
Hey guys. I'm selling tickets
29
00:01:06,896 --> 00:01:08,517
for the sophomore
class trip to funland.
30
00:01:08,551 --> 00:01:09,241
Do you want to go?
31
00:01:09,275 --> 00:01:11,379
Sure. Funland sounds like fun.
32
00:01:11,413 --> 00:01:12,448
How much?
33
00:01:12,482 --> 00:01:13,172
40 bucks.
34
00:01:13,206 --> 00:01:15,103
Whoa. who has that money?
35
00:01:15,137 --> 00:01:16,000
I do.
36
00:01:16,034 --> 00:01:17,724
The deadline's the
end of next week.
37
00:01:17,758 --> 00:01:18,758
So let me know.
38
00:01:18,793 --> 00:01:20,517
I can tell her right
now, I'll never be able
39
00:01:20,551 --> 00:01:21,724
to dig up that much cash.
40
00:01:21,758 --> 00:01:23,965
Me neither. Plus I
can't ask my aunts.
41
00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:26,275
They're on a teach-her-
the-value-of-a-dollar kick.
42
00:01:26,310 --> 00:01:27,241
What made them do that?
43
00:01:27,275 --> 00:01:28,206
I went on
44
00:01:28,241 --> 00:01:31,172
a blow-my-allowance-
on-dumb-stuff kick.
45
00:01:31,206 --> 00:01:32,482
And while I was on hold
46
00:01:32,517 --> 00:01:33,758
I realized I need
47
00:01:33,793 --> 00:01:35,655
one of those shoe buffers.
48
00:01:35,689 --> 00:01:36,586
What?
49
00:01:36,620 --> 00:01:37,758
Maxed out?
50
00:01:37,793 --> 00:01:38,862
But that's impossible.
51
00:01:38,896 --> 00:01:42,068
I demand to speak with
your super... hello. Hello?
52
00:01:42,103 --> 00:01:43,034
Salem, what's going on?
53
00:01:43,068 --> 00:01:44,241
I don't believe it.
54
00:01:44,275 --> 00:01:46,413
I had my credit card yanked.
55
00:01:46,448 --> 00:01:47,724
Youhave a credit card?
56
00:01:47,758 --> 00:01:49,862
Yes, I was preapproved
by the good people
57
00:01:49,896 --> 00:01:51,137
of the bank of Newark
58
00:01:51,172 --> 00:01:53,275
but now I'm a
little overextended.
59
00:01:53,310 --> 00:01:54,241
I'm sorry to hear that.
60
00:01:54,275 --> 00:01:56,034
I appreciate your concern.
61
00:01:56,068 --> 00:01:57,562
No cause' I was going
to hit you up for a loan.
62
00:01:57,586 --> 00:01:59,758
I was going to
ask you for money.
63
00:01:59,793 --> 00:02:00,793
How ironic.
64
00:02:00,827 --> 00:02:02,517
[ Chuckling]
65
00:02:02,551 --> 00:02:03,620
We're doomed.
66
00:02:03,655 --> 00:02:04,137
I guess we're going
67
00:02:04,172 --> 00:02:06,482
to have to get jobs.
68
00:02:06,517 --> 00:02:07,724
[ Knocking]
69
00:02:07,758 --> 00:02:08,965
Coming.
70
00:02:11,034 --> 00:02:12,103
Me again.
71
00:02:12,137 --> 00:02:12,965
Hello, dirk.
72
00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:14,068
Sorry to disturb you
73
00:02:14,103 --> 00:02:16,896
Ms. Zelda p. Spellman,
but I just finished my rounds
74
00:02:16,931 --> 00:02:19,862
when I discovered a straggler
in the bottom of my bag...
75
00:02:19,896 --> 00:02:21,689
For you.Thanks.
76
00:02:21,724 --> 00:02:22,965
Thought it might be important.
77
00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:25,758
I've been preapproved
by the bank of Newark.
78
00:02:25,793 --> 00:02:29,793
Say, uh, I saw you talking
to a fed-ex guy the other day.
79
00:02:29,827 --> 00:02:31,724
Is there something I
should know about?
80
00:02:31,758 --> 00:02:33,689
He was dropping off a package.
81
00:02:33,724 --> 00:02:35,413
Yeah. I don't trust those guys.
82
00:02:35,448 --> 00:02:38,172
It's not natural for
mail to move that fast.
83
00:02:38,206 --> 00:02:39,517
I agree.
84
00:02:39,551 --> 00:02:43,724
And now it's very important
that I close the door.
85
00:02:43,758 --> 00:02:46,172
He has really
got it bad for you.
86
00:02:46,206 --> 00:02:49,482
I wish there was some
gentle way to let him down.
87
00:02:49,517 --> 00:02:50,793
I know what you need.
88
00:02:50,827 --> 00:02:53,620
I just saw an ad for
it in modern witch.
89
00:02:53,655 --> 00:02:56,034
It's a new perfume
that repels love.
90
00:02:56,068 --> 00:02:57,103
Here it is.
91
00:02:57,137 --> 00:03:00,344
"Somewhere between
disdain and contempt lies...
92
00:03:00,379 --> 00:03:01,827
Revulsion."
93
00:03:01,862 --> 00:03:04,620
Revulsion? Hmm...
94
00:03:04,655 --> 00:03:07,103
"Available at full
moon beauty supply."
95
00:03:07,137 --> 00:03:08,275
Let's go.
96
00:03:08,310 --> 00:03:10,286
Can't. Full moon beauty
supply's only open once a month.
97
00:03:10,310 --> 00:03:11,137
When?
98
00:03:11,172 --> 00:03:12,965
During the full moon.
99
00:03:13,000 --> 00:03:14,172
I knew that.
100
00:03:14,206 --> 00:03:15,206
Accountant?
101
00:03:15,241 --> 00:03:16,275
No.
102
00:03:16,310 --> 00:03:17,310
Crane operator?
103
00:03:17,344 --> 00:03:18,586
No.
104
00:03:18,620 --> 00:03:19,862
System's analyst?
105
00:03:19,896 --> 00:03:21,034
Hey, I can do that.
106
00:03:21,068 --> 00:03:23,000
Good system, bad system.
107
00:03:23,034 --> 00:03:25,620
I think you need to know
something about computers.
108
00:03:25,655 --> 00:03:26,724
Hold everything.
109
00:03:26,758 --> 00:03:27,551
Look at this.
110
00:03:27,586 --> 00:03:29,413
"Greater Boston cat show...
111
00:03:29,448 --> 00:03:31,413
Grand prize: $500."
112
00:03:31,448 --> 00:03:32,482
A cat show?
113
00:03:32,517 --> 00:03:34,241
I can't see you in a cat show.
114
00:03:34,275 --> 00:03:35,758
Don't you think I'm pretty?
115
00:03:35,793 --> 00:03:36,827
Of course.
116
00:03:36,862 --> 00:03:38,034
Then get an application.
117
00:03:38,068 --> 00:03:39,965
This is our chance
for a quick score.
118
00:03:40,000 --> 00:03:41,000
All right.
119
00:03:44,068 --> 00:03:45,965
Okay, "name"?
120
00:03:46,000 --> 00:03:47,379
Salem spellman.
121
00:03:47,413 --> 00:03:50,000
May I remind you i'm
your cat, not your pet.
122
00:03:50,034 --> 00:03:51,620
I have my own last name.
123
00:03:51,655 --> 00:03:52,206
You do?
124
00:03:52,241 --> 00:03:53,103
It's saberhagen.
125
00:03:53,137 --> 00:03:55,172
Salem saberhagen.
126
00:03:55,206 --> 00:03:56,344
And what breed are you?
127
00:03:56,379 --> 00:03:58,862
American shorthair
and darn proud of it.
128
00:03:58,896 --> 00:04:01,000
Write that down; The
judges will eat that up.
129
00:04:01,034 --> 00:04:03,827
That's all we need... Except
for the five-dollar application fee.
130
00:04:03,862 --> 00:04:04,689
Don't look at me.
131
00:04:04,724 --> 00:04:05,724
I'm maxed out.
132
00:04:08,793 --> 00:04:09,517
Will you sign me in?
133
00:04:09,551 --> 00:04:11,275
I'm going to grab the last cage.
134
00:04:11,310 --> 00:04:12,137
Sure.
135
00:04:12,172 --> 00:04:14,000
It's saberhagen, right?
136
00:04:14,034 --> 00:04:15,793
Right.
137
00:04:15,827 --> 00:04:17,344
Here you go.
138
00:04:17,379 --> 00:04:18,275
Are you comfortable?
139
00:04:18,310 --> 00:04:20,000
I feel like a caged animal
140
00:04:20,034 --> 00:04:22,034
in here.
141
00:04:22,068 --> 00:04:24,034
Look at all these losers.
142
00:04:24,068 --> 00:04:25,620
Hey, you better behave yourself.
143
00:04:25,655 --> 00:04:26,275
I will.
144
00:04:26,310 --> 00:04:28,241
You always say that but...
145
00:04:28,275 --> 00:04:29,448
What am I doing?
146
00:04:29,482 --> 00:04:30,596
If people see me talking to
my cat, they'll think I'm nuts.
147
00:04:30,620 --> 00:04:31,655
Look around.
148
00:04:31,689 --> 00:04:33,724
Yes, you are. Yes, you are.
149
00:04:33,758 --> 00:04:35,482
You want to bea
winner, think like
150
00:04:35,517 --> 00:04:37,000
a winner.
151
00:04:37,034 --> 00:04:39,689
Okay. We can talk all we want.
152
00:04:39,724 --> 00:04:41,241
Hello.
153
00:04:41,275 --> 00:04:43,137
What a pretty cat.
154
00:04:43,172 --> 00:04:45,137
Oh, no ribbons.
155
00:04:45,172 --> 00:04:46,931
This is our first show.
156
00:04:46,965 --> 00:04:49,379
Duke has won quite a few times.
157
00:04:49,413 --> 00:04:51,448
See?
158
00:04:51,482 --> 00:04:52,448
It's nice of your cat
159
00:04:52,482 --> 00:04:53,206
to let you wear them.
160
00:04:53,241 --> 00:04:54,034
Oh, yes.
161
00:04:54,068 --> 00:04:56,586
He's a Burmese, you know?
162
00:04:56,620 --> 00:04:57,793
What's yours?
163
00:04:57,827 --> 00:04:59,275
An American shorthair.
164
00:04:59,310 --> 00:04:59,827
[ Clearing throat]
165
00:04:59,862 --> 00:05:01,068
And darn proud of it.
166
00:05:01,103 --> 00:05:03,000
Well, the Burmese
judging is up first.
167
00:05:03,034 --> 00:05:05,344
So we'd better
go finish grooming.
168
00:05:05,379 --> 00:05:06,758
Unbelievable. Did you see that?
169
00:05:06,793 --> 00:05:08,724
Her cat had whisker extensions.
170
00:05:08,758 --> 00:05:09,689
How could you tell?
171
00:05:09,724 --> 00:05:12,103
It's soobvious.
172
00:05:12,137 --> 00:05:14,206
I got you a good number... 38.
173
00:05:14,241 --> 00:05:15,344
Excellent.
174
00:05:15,379 --> 00:05:18,482
Lucky 38.
175
00:05:18,517 --> 00:05:19,379
Hey, isn't that
176
00:05:19,413 --> 00:05:21,413
Bob Gordon, the
channel eight news guy?
177
00:05:21,448 --> 00:05:23,344
Yeah. I guess he's the judge.
178
00:05:23,379 --> 00:05:26,034
Welcome to the
greater Boston cat show.
179
00:05:26,068 --> 00:05:28,482
I'm Bob Gordon.
180
00:05:28,517 --> 00:05:31,000
Today I will be selecting
for best of breed.
181
00:05:31,034 --> 00:05:32,314
Those winners
will stay overnight
182
00:05:32,344 --> 00:05:34,931
and tomorrow be
judged for best of show.
183
00:05:34,965 --> 00:05:37,172
I hope you're all
prepared for a thorough
184
00:05:37,206 --> 00:05:39,931
and perhaps even
grueling competition.
185
00:05:39,965 --> 00:05:41,206
Psst. Sabrina.
186
00:05:41,241 --> 00:05:41,931
Yeah?
187
00:05:41,965 --> 00:05:43,034
Get the brush.
188
00:05:43,068 --> 00:05:46,620
I'm shedding like crazy.
189
00:05:46,655 --> 00:05:47,517
What is he
190
00:05:47,551 --> 00:05:48,551
looking for?
191
00:05:48,586 --> 00:05:52,206
To see if it's a boy or a girl?
192
00:05:52,241 --> 00:05:54,689
This cat has excellent
bone structure
193
00:05:54,724 --> 00:05:58,068
a lovely coat and a somewhat
bemused expression.
194
00:05:58,103 --> 00:06:00,655
This is one of my top
three American shorthairs.
195
00:06:00,689 --> 00:06:01,586
Whoo-hoo!
196
00:06:01,620 --> 00:06:03,965
Congratulations.
197
00:06:04,000 --> 00:06:07,344
Now let's begin the
parade of semifinalists.
198
00:06:07,379 --> 00:06:08,034
Sabrina: Parade?
199
00:06:08,068 --> 00:06:08,931
Watch out for Andrew.
200
00:06:08,965 --> 00:06:10,137
He'll try to trip you.
201
00:06:10,172 --> 00:06:11,310
Watch out for Mrs. Erickson.
202
00:06:11,344 --> 00:06:12,758
She plays head games.
203
00:06:12,793 --> 00:06:15,137
Watch out for Haley...
She's paranoid.
204
00:06:15,172 --> 00:06:16,793
Here we go.
205
00:06:16,827 --> 00:06:18,137
[ "The alley cat" playing]
206
00:06:24,034 --> 00:06:26,034
This is the cheesiest
thing I've ever done.
207
00:06:26,068 --> 00:06:27,068
Salem: Smile.
208
00:06:28,241 --> 00:06:29,310
Hey!
209
00:06:29,344 --> 00:06:31,551
Did I step on your shoe?
210
00:06:31,586 --> 00:06:34,206
How am I supposed to choose?
211
00:06:39,068 --> 00:06:40,379
Do you mind if I take off?
212
00:06:40,413 --> 00:06:42,034
I'm bored out of my skull.
213
00:06:42,068 --> 00:06:45,137
Go ahead. My
aunts can pick me up.
214
00:06:45,172 --> 00:06:47,172
This was fun.
215
00:06:47,206 --> 00:06:48,517
Now we will begin
216
00:06:48,551 --> 00:06:49,965
the one-on-one
217
00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:51,413
interviews.
218
00:06:51,448 --> 00:06:54,103
What can you tell me
about Salem's temperament?
219
00:06:54,137 --> 00:06:56,379
Well, he's very
friendly, very focused
220
00:06:56,413 --> 00:06:58,862
and just a little power mad.
221
00:06:58,896 --> 00:07:00,413
Sounds like he's all cat.
222
00:07:00,448 --> 00:07:03,310
Right. And he's got a
real head for numbers.
223
00:07:03,344 --> 00:07:05,620
May I demonstrate?
224
00:07:05,655 --> 00:07:07,620
Ask him a simple
multiplication question.
225
00:07:07,655 --> 00:07:08,620
Okay.
226
00:07:08,655 --> 00:07:10,965
Salem, uh, what's
seven times five?
227
00:07:12,862 --> 00:07:14,793
Amazing.
228
00:07:14,827 --> 00:07:17,172
Although we do judge
purely on appearance.
229
00:07:17,206 --> 00:07:20,758
Isn't that life?
230
00:07:20,793 --> 00:07:22,689
Will all of our semifinalists
231
00:07:22,724 --> 00:07:24,551
please bring their cats forward.
232
00:07:24,586 --> 00:07:28,137
I will now announce my
best of breed decisions.
233
00:07:38,034 --> 00:07:40,275
[ Maniacal laughing]
234
00:07:40,310 --> 00:07:41,310
[ Meows]
235
00:07:56,379 --> 00:08:00,862
And thisis my first-place
American shorthair.
236
00:08:00,896 --> 00:08:03,275
And darn proud of it.
237
00:08:03,310 --> 00:08:04,413
Come on, hilda.
238
00:08:04,448 --> 00:08:06,034
Full moon. Let's go.
239
00:08:06,068 --> 00:08:07,000
Coming.
240
00:08:07,034 --> 00:08:07,689
Relax.
241
00:08:07,724 --> 00:08:08,931
You'll get your revulsion.
242
00:08:08,965 --> 00:08:10,206
Oh, I hope it works.
243
00:08:10,241 --> 00:08:13,103
I don't want dirk going
after the u.P.S. Guy again.
244
00:08:20,413 --> 00:08:21,620
Hello.
245
00:08:21,655 --> 00:08:22,482
Welcome
246
00:08:22,517 --> 00:08:24,620
to full moon beauty supply.
247
00:08:24,655 --> 00:08:26,620
May I help you?
248
00:08:26,655 --> 00:08:28,206
I need a bottle of revulsion.
249
00:08:28,241 --> 00:08:31,034
Ah, someone's bothering you.
250
00:08:31,068 --> 00:08:33,137
A little or a lot?
251
00:08:33,172 --> 00:08:33,793
Well...
252
00:08:33,827 --> 00:08:35,034
Get the bigone.
253
00:08:35,068 --> 00:08:37,965
A pretty girl like you
needs a lot of revulsion.
254
00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:39,172
Oh, what's this?
255
00:08:39,206 --> 00:08:42,172
Oh, this is a magic mirror
256
00:08:42,206 --> 00:08:44,000
that shows you at your best.
257
00:08:44,034 --> 00:08:47,034
"The makeover mirror...
It's a nice reflection on you."
258
00:08:47,068 --> 00:08:49,482
Try it.
259
00:08:49,517 --> 00:08:52,586
I'm ravishing.
260
00:08:52,620 --> 00:08:53,724
I have to have it.
261
00:08:53,758 --> 00:08:56,275
Oh, here. Buy two,
one for each of you.
262
00:08:56,310 --> 00:08:57,379
No.
263
00:08:57,413 --> 00:08:59,551
Hilda, you can't
buy self-esteem.
264
00:08:59,586 --> 00:09:02,034
Yes, I can, and it's on sale.
265
00:09:02,068 --> 00:09:04,448
Try some wrinkle berries.
266
00:09:04,482 --> 00:09:08,103
They smooth out your
face and other places.
267
00:09:08,137 --> 00:09:09,413
Here, I give you half a pound.
268
00:09:09,448 --> 00:09:10,413
No. Thank you.
269
00:09:10,448 --> 00:09:12,068
We can shop for ourselves.
270
00:09:12,103 --> 00:09:13,103
Fine.
271
00:09:15,068 --> 00:09:16,068
Oh, stress mints.
272
00:09:16,103 --> 00:09:16,896
I wonder if they work.
273
00:09:16,931 --> 00:09:19,103
Careful. It says no samples.
274
00:09:19,137 --> 00:09:20,344
I can read.
275
00:09:24,586 --> 00:09:26,275
Hilda, what have you done?
276
00:09:26,310 --> 00:09:27,793
I didn't do anything.
277
00:09:27,827 --> 00:09:28,827
Aha!
278
00:09:28,862 --> 00:09:31,206
My no-sample spell works.
279
00:09:31,241 --> 00:09:32,551
I couldn't help myself.
280
00:09:32,586 --> 00:09:34,034
Change me back, please.
281
00:09:34,068 --> 00:09:38,275
Okay, but first, you'll
pay for the stress mints
282
00:09:38,310 --> 00:09:39,896
and then you'll buy
a sample antidote.
283
00:09:39,931 --> 00:09:42,275
Then you'll buy
a gift certificate.
284
00:09:42,310 --> 00:09:45,758
Oh, sure. Stick
it to the little guy.
285
00:09:47,689 --> 00:09:49,206
Today best of breed.
286
00:09:49,241 --> 00:09:51,206
Tomorrow best of show.
287
00:09:51,241 --> 00:09:53,137
You should be very proud, Salem.
288
00:09:53,172 --> 00:09:56,551
Here's your milk...
And the economist.
289
00:09:56,586 --> 00:10:00,758
And now I have
to go call my aunts.
290
00:10:00,793 --> 00:10:02,241
I guess we're closing
down the place.
291
00:10:02,275 --> 00:10:02,793
[ Phone ringing]
292
00:10:02,827 --> 00:10:04,344
Excuse me. Got to go.
293
00:10:04,379 --> 00:10:05,137
Mm-hmm.
294
00:10:05,172 --> 00:10:06,965
[ Clearing throat]
295
00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:09,620
Hello?
296
00:10:09,655 --> 00:10:11,517
Who isthis?
297
00:10:11,551 --> 00:10:12,758
Yes, I'm alone.
298
00:10:12,793 --> 00:10:14,275
Hmm?
299
00:10:14,310 --> 00:10:17,206
In the briefcase?
300
00:10:17,241 --> 00:10:18,724
Oh, dear lord.
301
00:10:18,758 --> 00:10:21,379
Where did you get this photo?
302
00:10:21,413 --> 00:10:22,068
Name your price.
303
00:10:22,103 --> 00:10:24,137
I'll pay you anything.
304
00:10:24,172 --> 00:10:25,448
Uh-huh...
305
00:10:25,482 --> 00:10:26,551
Uh-huh.
306
00:10:26,586 --> 00:10:27,137
That's it?
307
00:10:27,172 --> 00:10:29,896
No, no. No. No problem.
308
00:10:29,931 --> 00:10:32,000
You just keep those
negatives to yourself
309
00:10:32,034 --> 00:10:35,172
and I promise your cat
will be named best of show.
310
00:10:54,000 --> 00:10:54,724
Good night again, Mr. Gor...
311
00:10:54,758 --> 00:10:57,103
Out of my way.
312
00:10:57,137 --> 00:10:58,034
What's with him?
313
00:10:58,068 --> 00:10:59,517
The contest is fixed.
314
00:10:59,551 --> 00:11:02,310
The judge is being blackmailed
with an incriminating photo.
315
00:11:02,344 --> 00:11:03,517
Your kidding, of what?
316
00:11:03,551 --> 00:11:05,896
I don't know, but he
took it into his office.
317
00:11:05,931 --> 00:11:07,034
I'll go check.
318
00:11:07,068 --> 00:11:08,137
I'll stay here.
319
00:11:15,068 --> 00:11:16,413
There it is.
320
00:11:19,068 --> 00:11:20,655
Incredible.
321
00:11:20,689 --> 00:11:21,965
If people only knew.
322
00:11:22,000 --> 00:11:23,827
I thought I'd closed that.
323
00:11:23,862 --> 00:11:25,379
Meow?
324
00:11:25,413 --> 00:11:26,344
Meow!
325
00:11:26,379 --> 00:11:27,379
Oh, no.
326
00:11:29,793 --> 00:11:32,827
Kitty...
327
00:11:34,137 --> 00:11:36,172
How did you get in here?
328
00:11:36,206 --> 00:11:38,793
Okay, there you go.
329
00:11:38,827 --> 00:11:41,482
There you go.
330
00:11:41,517 --> 00:11:45,517
Oh, you are a
pretty little kitty.
331
00:11:45,551 --> 00:11:47,896
Too bad you don't have a chance.
332
00:11:53,034 --> 00:11:54,068
Salem?
333
00:11:54,103 --> 00:11:55,344
Sabrina, where are you?
334
00:11:55,379 --> 00:11:57,551
Next to you... in a cage.
335
00:12:00,827 --> 00:12:02,275
Salem, this is awful.
336
00:12:02,310 --> 00:12:05,000
If I can't point, I
can't turn myself back.
337
00:12:05,034 --> 00:12:05,724
What was that?
338
00:12:05,758 --> 00:12:06,517
What?
339
00:12:06,551 --> 00:12:07,734
There's something
in here with me!
340
00:12:07,758 --> 00:12:08,482
What?
341
00:12:08,517 --> 00:12:10,620
Oh. It's just my tail.
342
00:12:12,482 --> 00:12:13,482
Hello?
343
00:12:13,517 --> 00:12:15,689
Sabrina, are you in here?
344
00:12:15,724 --> 00:12:18,206
Yes. Next to Salem.
345
00:12:18,241 --> 00:12:19,689
Sabrina?
346
00:12:19,724 --> 00:12:22,655
Hi... or should I say "meow"?
347
00:12:22,689 --> 00:12:25,172
Look how cute the
little blonde kitty is.
348
00:12:25,206 --> 00:12:27,068
I have claws, and
I will use them.
349
00:12:27,103 --> 00:12:28,413
Now, change me back.
350
00:12:28,448 --> 00:12:30,379
Here you go.
351
00:12:30,413 --> 00:12:31,724
Oh...
352
00:12:31,758 --> 00:12:33,034
Help me, hilda.
353
00:12:34,689 --> 00:12:35,758
That feels so much...
354
00:12:35,793 --> 00:12:37,068
[ Screaming]
355
00:12:37,103 --> 00:12:38,344
Change the rest of me!
356
00:12:38,379 --> 00:12:39,413
Sorry.
357
00:12:42,275 --> 00:12:43,620
Now what is going on?
358
00:12:43,655 --> 00:12:44,862
I'll explain everything
359
00:12:44,896 --> 00:12:47,413
but right now I really have to
get home and brush my teeth.
360
00:12:47,448 --> 00:12:48,586
[ Coughing]
361
00:12:48,620 --> 00:12:51,172
Ugh! Another hair ball.
362
00:12:51,206 --> 00:12:53,034
And to think... They
call Bob Gordon
363
00:12:53,068 --> 00:12:55,931
the most trusted name
in new england news.
364
00:12:55,965 --> 00:12:56,965
Who would have thought
365
00:12:57,000 --> 00:12:58,458
the cat show would be
a cauldron of corruption?
366
00:12:58,482 --> 00:12:59,655
Don't give up.
367
00:12:59,689 --> 00:13:02,034
All you have to do is figure
out who the blackmailer is.
368
00:13:02,068 --> 00:13:04,103
The problem is
everyone has a motive...
369
00:13:04,137 --> 00:13:05,482
Everyone wants to win.
370
00:13:05,517 --> 00:13:08,379
But only the blackmailer
took this picture.
371
00:13:08,413 --> 00:13:11,827
A "reverse angle" spell
will tell us who that is.
372
00:13:11,862 --> 00:13:12,793
There!
373
00:13:12,827 --> 00:13:15,689
And the blackmailer is...
374
00:13:15,724 --> 00:13:18,000
A person wearing a loose
robe obscured by shadow
375
00:13:18,034 --> 00:13:20,034
with a big camera
covering his...
376
00:13:20,068 --> 00:13:21,275
Or her... face.
377
00:13:21,310 --> 00:13:23,482
There must be some
distinguishing characteristic.
378
00:13:23,517 --> 00:13:25,724
All you can see
is the right hand...
379
00:13:25,758 --> 00:13:26,896
Wait a sec.
380
00:13:26,931 --> 00:13:29,103
Does that look like a
whole finger to you?
381
00:13:29,137 --> 00:13:31,310
No. Whoever took this photo
382
00:13:31,344 --> 00:13:33,689
is missing half an index finger.
383
00:13:33,724 --> 00:13:36,413
And that's who
your blackmailer is.
384
00:13:36,448 --> 00:13:37,620
So it's not over?
385
00:13:37,655 --> 00:13:38,931
Not even close.
386
00:13:38,965 --> 00:13:43,827
Now, if you'll excuse me, I
have to go meet and greet.
387
00:13:43,862 --> 00:13:45,275
Did I just do a cat thing?
388
00:13:45,310 --> 00:13:46,034
Yeah.
389
00:13:46,068 --> 00:13:48,310
Ugh...
390
00:13:48,344 --> 00:13:49,275
Good morning, Mrs. Erickson.
391
00:13:49,310 --> 00:13:50,596
I just wanted to
wish you good luck.
392
00:13:50,620 --> 00:13:52,034
May the best cat win.
393
00:13:52,068 --> 00:13:53,758
You mean my Duke.
394
00:13:53,793 --> 00:13:54,793
Thanks.
395
00:13:56,724 --> 00:13:59,034
Uh, what a nice grooming mitt.
396
00:13:59,068 --> 00:13:59,793
May I see it?
397
00:13:59,827 --> 00:14:01,172
Get your own.
398
00:14:01,206 --> 00:14:02,551
You're the competition.
399
00:14:04,413 --> 00:14:05,862
Haley, I just
400
00:14:05,896 --> 00:14:06,793
wanted to say
401
00:14:06,827 --> 00:14:09,241
it's been really great
getting to know you.
402
00:14:09,275 --> 00:14:10,482
I don't touch people.
403
00:14:12,068 --> 00:14:13,655
How goes the investigation?
404
00:14:13,689 --> 00:14:14,689
Not good.
405
00:14:14,724 --> 00:14:16,034
My three prime suspects
406
00:14:16,068 --> 00:14:18,482
are all cleverly
concealing their hands.
407
00:14:18,517 --> 00:14:20,827
I know how to fix that.
408
00:14:20,862 --> 00:14:21,862
Mini-quiches.
409
00:14:21,896 --> 00:14:22,862
No one can resist them.
410
00:14:22,896 --> 00:14:23,965
Oh, looks good.
411
00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:24,827
Those aren't for you.
412
00:14:24,862 --> 00:14:26,482
They're for the blackmailer.
413
00:14:26,517 --> 00:14:28,551
Here.
414
00:14:28,586 --> 00:14:29,275
Free quiche!
415
00:14:29,310 --> 00:14:30,000
Help yourselves!
416
00:14:30,034 --> 00:14:31,965
Oh! Don't mind if I do.
417
00:14:32,000 --> 00:14:33,448
Well, maybe just one.
418
00:14:33,482 --> 00:14:36,206
I did skip breakfast.
419
00:14:36,241 --> 00:14:37,517
[ All gasping]
420
00:14:37,551 --> 00:14:39,793
Well, look at that!
421
00:14:39,827 --> 00:14:41,758
I thought I was the only one.
422
00:14:41,793 --> 00:14:43,586
This is amazing.
423
00:14:43,620 --> 00:14:44,241
Shop class?
424
00:14:44,275 --> 00:14:45,689
Farm accident.
425
00:14:45,724 --> 00:14:47,620
I used to keep wolverines.
426
00:14:47,655 --> 00:14:49,724
We should start a support group.
427
00:14:49,758 --> 00:14:51,000
Oh, thanks for the quiche.
428
00:14:53,586 --> 00:14:55,103
It's over, Salem.
429
00:14:55,137 --> 00:14:57,034
The blackmailer
has the perfect cover.
430
00:14:57,068 --> 00:14:58,724
Then take me home.
431
00:14:58,758 --> 00:15:02,896
I want to enjoy something
pure, like harness racing.
432
00:15:02,931 --> 00:15:04,044
He's not going to
get away with this.
433
00:15:04,068 --> 00:15:07,034
Mr. Gordon, I need to
talk to you, right away.
434
00:15:07,068 --> 00:15:09,655
I'm about to make the
best of show presentation.
435
00:15:09,689 --> 00:15:10,931
It can wait.
436
00:15:10,965 --> 00:15:13,551
Pushy... like a
young Diane Sawyer.
437
00:15:16,275 --> 00:15:17,448
What is it?
438
00:15:17,482 --> 00:15:18,762
I know you're being blackmailed.
439
00:15:18,793 --> 00:15:20,517
I saw the photo; I
know your secret.
440
00:15:20,551 --> 00:15:22,034
So what do you want?
441
00:15:22,068 --> 00:15:23,068
Second place?
442
00:15:23,103 --> 00:15:26,206
No. Look, don't give in
to them... come clean.
443
00:15:26,241 --> 00:15:27,769
You don't have to hide
the fact that you're...
444
00:15:27,793 --> 00:15:28,793
Don't say it!
445
00:15:28,827 --> 00:15:29,344
Bald.
446
00:15:29,379 --> 00:15:30,482
Shh!
447
00:15:30,517 --> 00:15:32,620
You have no idea
what this means.
448
00:15:32,655 --> 00:15:34,310
It could destroy my career.
449
00:15:34,344 --> 00:15:36,137
How? Aren't
honesty and integrity
450
00:15:36,172 --> 00:15:37,896
the most important
to a journalist?
451
00:15:37,931 --> 00:15:39,172
Not in this decade.
452
00:15:39,206 --> 00:15:40,793
People like people with hair.
453
00:15:40,827 --> 00:15:41,965
They've done studies.
454
00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:45,103
The public hasn't trusted a
bald man since eisenhower.
455
00:15:45,137 --> 00:15:47,620
But they believe in you,
and you're not playing fair.
456
00:15:47,655 --> 00:15:49,206
You want to talk about fair?
457
00:15:49,241 --> 00:15:52,655
I wore a toupee to
my first frat party.
458
00:15:52,689 --> 00:15:54,517
Don't talk to meabout fair.
459
00:15:59,724 --> 00:16:01,413
Sabrina, I didn't want
460
00:16:01,448 --> 00:16:03,034
to miss Salem's big showdown.
461
00:16:03,068 --> 00:16:04,241
I'm not late, am I?
462
00:16:04,275 --> 00:16:05,137
You didn't miss anything
463
00:16:05,172 --> 00:16:06,827
except confirmation
we live in a rotten
464
00:16:06,862 --> 00:16:10,379
crooked, corrupt,
stinking world.
465
00:16:10,413 --> 00:16:11,448
Good.
466
00:16:11,482 --> 00:16:14,482
The moment we've all
been waiting for has arrived.
467
00:16:14,517 --> 00:16:17,724
What does it take to
be a championship cat?
468
00:16:17,758 --> 00:16:19,103
Mrs. Erickson
469
00:16:19,137 --> 00:16:20,862
may I please see Duke?
470
00:16:20,896 --> 00:16:23,310
So that's who
the blackmailer is.
471
00:16:23,344 --> 00:16:26,344
Duke is a fine, superb cat.
472
00:16:26,379 --> 00:16:27,000
Note the tail
473
00:16:27,034 --> 00:16:28,344
the bone structure
474
00:16:28,379 --> 00:16:30,620
the excellent tension
in the whiskers.
475
00:16:30,655 --> 00:16:31,827
What... what is this?
476
00:16:31,862 --> 00:16:34,000
That cat has whisker extensions!
477
00:16:34,034 --> 00:16:35,206
Those are illegal!
478
00:16:35,241 --> 00:16:37,931
No they're not. I checked
the rule book very carefully
479
00:16:37,965 --> 00:16:40,482
and there's nothing wrong
with whisker extensions.
480
00:16:40,517 --> 00:16:41,724
Gordon: Absolutely.
481
00:16:41,758 --> 00:16:43,172
If Mrs. Erickson would like
482
00:16:43,206 --> 00:16:45,241
to glue bits of hair
onto her animal
483
00:16:45,275 --> 00:16:46,379
to improve its image
484
00:16:46,413 --> 00:16:48,103
she can.
485
00:16:48,137 --> 00:16:50,551
It may seem a little desperate
486
00:16:50,586 --> 00:16:51,965
a little silly
487
00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:53,413
a little vain.
488
00:16:53,448 --> 00:16:55,103
But who are we to...
489
00:16:55,137 --> 00:16:59,448
Oh, dear lord, it's like
looking into a mirror.
490
00:16:59,482 --> 00:17:01,793
It's time to come clean.
491
00:17:01,827 --> 00:17:04,793
Our top story tonight is this...
492
00:17:05,931 --> 00:17:07,275
[ Gasps]
493
00:17:07,310 --> 00:17:08,517
He's bald.
494
00:17:08,551 --> 00:17:10,379
None of you saw this.
495
00:17:10,413 --> 00:17:11,689
Stop. It's over.
496
00:17:11,724 --> 00:17:14,413
No, it's just the beginning.
497
00:17:14,448 --> 00:17:17,620
Mr. Gordon thought he
needed this to gain people's trust
498
00:17:17,655 --> 00:17:18,758
but trust should not depend
499
00:17:18,793 --> 00:17:20,310
on fake hair.
500
00:17:20,344 --> 00:17:23,000
Trust should depend on
real knowledge, integrity
501
00:17:23,034 --> 00:17:24,482
and accurate reporting.
502
00:17:24,517 --> 00:17:26,448
Sabrina, he's on TV news.
503
00:17:26,482 --> 00:17:28,137
Still, we should
applaud this man
504
00:17:28,172 --> 00:17:29,206
who stood before us
505
00:17:29,241 --> 00:17:31,724
and bared his naked head.
506
00:17:31,758 --> 00:17:32,758
Thank you.
507
00:17:33,793 --> 00:17:36,172
Big deal!
508
00:17:36,206 --> 00:17:38,448
Now, can we get on
with the competition?
509
00:17:38,482 --> 00:17:39,758
Who won best of show?
510
00:17:39,793 --> 00:17:42,655
Duke did. He was already
announced the winner.
511
00:17:42,689 --> 00:17:43,965
I take it back.
512
00:17:44,000 --> 00:17:45,793
I'm disqualifying
you for attempting
513
00:17:45,827 --> 00:17:47,551
to influence a
cat show official.
514
00:17:47,586 --> 00:17:49,448
And that is in the rule book.
515
00:17:49,482 --> 00:17:50,275
You don't understand.
516
00:17:50,310 --> 00:17:51,896
Duke is getting older.
517
00:17:51,931 --> 00:17:54,448
He's not as pretty
as he used to be.
518
00:17:54,482 --> 00:17:55,586
Oh, god!
519
00:17:55,620 --> 00:17:57,896
I miss my youth!
520
00:17:57,931 --> 00:18:01,103
Talk about cracking
under the pressure.
521
00:18:01,137 --> 00:18:02,517
Enough about people.
522
00:18:02,551 --> 00:18:03,827
Who's the best cat?
523
00:18:06,034 --> 00:18:09,586
The truth makes
that decision easy.
524
00:18:09,620 --> 00:18:13,482
This weekend, I have met
a rare and extraordinary cat
525
00:18:13,517 --> 00:18:15,275
a cat unlike any other.
526
00:18:17,344 --> 00:18:19,620
Where is Salem saberhagen?
527
00:18:21,482 --> 00:18:22,965
Oh, my god!
528
00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:25,310
Everything's in slow motion.
529
00:18:25,344 --> 00:18:26,517
Now, here is a cat
530
00:18:26,551 --> 00:18:29,344
who is not only
attractive but intelligent
531
00:18:29,379 --> 00:18:31,068
and I would like to award it
532
00:18:31,103 --> 00:18:33,172
the first-prize blue ribbon...
533
00:18:33,206 --> 00:18:34,724
Whoa! Whoa!
534
00:18:34,758 --> 00:18:36,241
Wait a minute.
535
00:18:36,275 --> 00:18:38,965
There isanother cat...
536
00:18:39,000 --> 00:18:40,827
The most beautiful little kitty
537
00:18:40,862 --> 00:18:42,206
that I have ever seen.
538
00:18:42,241 --> 00:18:43,965
Where is that blonde cat?
539
00:18:44,000 --> 00:18:45,689
What blonde cat?
540
00:18:45,724 --> 00:18:47,689
Wait a sec.
541
00:18:47,724 --> 00:18:49,586
I know where she is.
542
00:18:49,620 --> 00:18:50,931
What is she doing?
543
00:18:50,965 --> 00:18:52,206
Her cat was about to win.
544
00:18:52,241 --> 00:18:53,379
Don't worry, Harvey.
545
00:18:53,413 --> 00:18:54,517
Sabrina always lands
546
00:18:54,551 --> 00:18:55,655
on her feet.
547
00:18:55,689 --> 00:18:58,379
Pretend I belong to you.
548
00:18:58,413 --> 00:19:00,758
Is this the cat
you're looking for?
549
00:19:00,793 --> 00:19:02,034
Why, yes.
550
00:19:02,068 --> 00:19:03,000
What's her name?
551
00:19:03,034 --> 00:19:04,275
Sabrina.
552
00:19:04,310 --> 00:19:06,275
She named her cat Sabrina?
553
00:19:06,310 --> 00:19:08,103
Doesn't that get confusing
around the house?
554
00:19:08,137 --> 00:19:10,448
It's a pretty confusing
place in general.
555
00:19:10,482 --> 00:19:12,551
I am pleased and
proud to announce
556
00:19:12,586 --> 00:19:14,689
and with the utmost integrity
557
00:19:14,724 --> 00:19:18,172
that this blonde cat is best
of show grand champion.
558
00:19:18,206 --> 00:19:19,206
Whoo-hoo!
559
00:19:20,689 --> 00:19:22,827
I was so close.
560
00:19:22,862 --> 00:19:24,758
[ Salem crying]
561
00:19:27,068 --> 00:19:27,793
No, Harvey.
562
00:19:27,827 --> 00:19:29,034
She's not for sale.
563
00:19:29,068 --> 00:19:30,551
Are you sure?
564
00:19:30,586 --> 00:19:32,448
She's the sweetest,
most beautiful cat
565
00:19:32,482 --> 00:19:33,689
I've ever held.
566
00:19:33,724 --> 00:19:34,620
All set.
567
00:19:34,655 --> 00:19:35,482
What did you do?
568
00:19:35,517 --> 00:19:36,862
I felt bad for Bob Gordon.
569
00:19:36,896 --> 00:19:38,689
So I left a little
present in his office.
570
00:19:44,689 --> 00:19:46,517
Let's check out the damage.
571
00:19:49,206 --> 00:19:50,862
Oh...
572
00:19:50,896 --> 00:19:52,620
My!
573
00:19:52,655 --> 00:19:54,793
I look fabulous.
574
00:19:54,827 --> 00:19:58,206
Bobby, baby... Bobby, booby.
575
00:19:58,241 --> 00:19:59,965
I'm Bob Gordon
576
00:20:00,000 --> 00:20:03,413
and this is eyewitness
action news center eight.
577
00:20:06,517 --> 00:20:07,172
Salem?
578
00:20:07,206 --> 00:20:08,172
Meow.
579
00:20:08,206 --> 00:20:09,482
Come on, Salem.
580
00:20:09,517 --> 00:20:10,241
Meow, meow.
581
00:20:10,275 --> 00:20:12,413
You have to talk to me sometime.
582
00:20:12,448 --> 00:20:13,586
I've got your chin.
583
00:20:13,620 --> 00:20:16,413
Oh... oh, that feels good.
584
00:20:16,448 --> 00:20:17,206
Wait. I'm still
585
00:20:17,241 --> 00:20:18,275
mad at you.
586
00:20:18,310 --> 00:20:20,137
I can't believe
you did that to me.
587
00:20:20,172 --> 00:20:23,758
I said I was sorry.
My vanity took over.
588
00:20:23,793 --> 00:20:24,838
But it all worked out fine.
589
00:20:24,862 --> 00:20:26,113
Harvey and I get
to go to funland
590
00:20:26,137 --> 00:20:27,862
and I promise to
pay off your debt.
591
00:20:27,896 --> 00:20:30,206
I guess the money
is all that matters.
592
00:20:30,241 --> 00:20:31,241
No, it's not.
593
00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:34,586
And that's why you
should have this.
594
00:20:34,620 --> 00:20:36,724
The blue ribbon?
595
00:20:36,758 --> 00:20:39,206
You deserve it... after
all, you are the best cat.
596
00:20:40,758 --> 00:20:41,655
Salem?
597
00:20:41,689 --> 00:20:42,344
Just got a little something
598
00:20:42,379 --> 00:20:43,448
in my eye.
599
00:20:48,413 --> 00:20:52,379
[ Knocking]
600
00:20:52,413 --> 00:20:53,931
Dirk. I was hoping
601
00:20:53,965 --> 00:20:55,206
you'd stop by today.
602
00:20:55,241 --> 00:20:58,034
I brought your mail
and some Omaha steaks
603
00:20:58,068 --> 00:20:59,586
I found in the
unclaimed mail room.
604
00:20:59,620 --> 00:21:01,862
How thoughtful.
605
00:21:01,896 --> 00:21:03,344
Hey, would you like to come in
606
00:21:03,379 --> 00:21:04,482
for a cup of coffee?
607
00:21:04,517 --> 00:21:06,103
I'd like that.
608
00:21:06,137 --> 00:21:08,793
Wow! It's really happening.
609
00:21:08,827 --> 00:21:10,551
Do you take cream and sugar?
610
00:21:10,586 --> 00:21:13,517
Yes, please.
611
00:21:13,551 --> 00:21:14,551
Hey!
612
00:21:14,586 --> 00:21:16,448
You're reading the
magazine I brought you.
613
00:21:16,482 --> 00:21:18,965
Yes and I'm paying the
bills you brought me, too.
614
00:21:19,000 --> 00:21:20,172
I'm sorry about those.
615
00:21:20,206 --> 00:21:22,172
Enough shop talk.
616
00:21:22,206 --> 00:21:24,413
See, Zelda, my interest in you
617
00:21:24,448 --> 00:21:26,241
is not purely professional.
618
00:21:26,275 --> 00:21:28,896
You are no mere
"occupant" to me.
619
00:21:28,931 --> 00:21:31,275
You're the bright
spot on my route.
620
00:21:31,310 --> 00:21:33,172
Can you meet my
parents this Sunday?
621
00:21:33,206 --> 00:21:36,241
I think first you should
get to know the real me.
622
00:21:36,275 --> 00:21:38,551
I think I know you pretty well.
623
00:21:38,586 --> 00:21:41,137
Here's your coffee.
624
00:21:41,172 --> 00:21:42,172
Thanks.
625
00:21:43,413 --> 00:21:44,482
You a little tired?
626
00:21:46,344 --> 00:21:47,965
I'm exhausted.
40145
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
