All language subtitles for Spin City s01e06 A Star Is Born.eng

And finally, special thanks to
Ashley schaeffer for filling in today.

You guys are tough.
I hope I didn't embarrass myself.

Well, you certainly didn't
pull any punches with Harvey.

So, tune in next Sunday when
we have the regular group back

here on focus new York.

Hmm?

How good did you look
on that tv show?

Well, it's not meet the press,
but I think I did really well.

I mean, how good did you
look on that tv show?

You are turning my first ever
television appearance

into a sexual thing?

I'm trying to.

How nice.

Don't get me wrong. I think you're
bright, intelligent, articulate,

and you generally kick butt.
It's an added bonus that...

I'm really turned on.

It is, is it?

Definitely. When
I grew up watching tv,

I always fantasized
about the women.

Farrah fawcett, Linda Carter...

...Betty rubble.

She's a cartoon character,
Mike.

But she had a hot little body.

Everybody have a good weekend?

Too lazy to leave
my apartment. You?

I actually paid guys
to come over

and move the refrigerator
closer to my couch.

Get yourself a bedpan,

you can lay down Friday night

and call it a weekend.

Oh, Stuart, one day,

you're going to make
some woman very, very unhappy.

Mayor's approval
ratings came out.

And?

ahh...

Ooh...

I'd like to make
a silly noise, too,

but I don't know
what these numbers mean.

It's actually a very
predictable poll.

Goes up with good news,
down with bad news.

What you want to watch
for is a long, steady...

Drop.

Ooh.

This is the slump
of all slumps.

They hate us.
I don't understand it.

They elected us in.

This wasn't a military coup.

All right, Paul.
Let's see if we can

start turning the tide
on this one.

We're gonna introduce our nominee
for public schools chancellor

Joel bronsteen.
He's an exceptional candidate.

So let's use him.
Let's drum up a little excitement.

You got it, Mike.
This is

going to be like
an afternoon at the circus.

Nikki, Carter, throw
together a focus group.

Find out
what's on people's minds.

This is exciting.

Chance to see
democracy in action.

Allowing the citizens
to speak directly

to the people responsible
for governing them.

I'd like to be
a part of that. What?

No, nothing. I've just never
seen this side of you before.

This is the side that loved
the lion king, right?

Hey. Professor bronsteen.
Good morning.

Good morning, Michael.
I hope I didn't get James here into any trouble.

I dragged him over to the
regency for breakfast.

Mike, $11 for 2 eggs.

Back in Wisconsin, I once bought
a dozen eggs for 60 cents.

There were
4 double-yokers.

I bet your family
still talks about that.

See you later, Jim.
Sure.

Jumping ship, egg boy?

What?

Kissing up to the new
public schools chancellor.

Go work under him.
Maybe leapfrog a few positions.

Gamble he's a candidate
down the line.

Stuart, he was the Dean
of students at Columbia.

When I showed up freshman year,

I was this
unsophisticated geek.

And he told you it was ok
to be that way forever?

I just owe a lot to that guy.

That's fine. But you're
in line behind me.

Remember that.
You have got to know your place.

Stuey, fetch us another
cup of coffee, chop-chop.

Chop-chop.

Remember, let's try to
pump this up a little.

Mike, please,
I'm a master at this.

Ladies and gentlemen,
the mayor.

What the hell was that?

What, are you kidding?
I killed out there.

Good morning.

Now, as you all know,
the retirement of

Raymond rodriquez

has left us with

very large shoes to fill.

But we feel confident that we
have found a worthy successor.

So, ladies and gentlemen,
my nominee

for the new public schools
chancellor- Joel bronsteen.

Thank you, mr. Mayor.
Good morning, everybody.

I think I'm a familiar face
to most of you here,

and you've already
received a copy

of my proposal
for curriculum reform,

so I don't really think I have
anything to add at this time.

Whoo-boy.
This is exciting.

The conventional wisdom is that the
public school system is beyond repair.

Why would you want
to take this on?

That's very funny.

My wife asked me that very same
question last night at dinner.

actually, I myself am a product of
the new York public school system,

and I can think of
no more worthy task

than restoring
that great institution

to its former Glory.

Dr. Bronsteen, this morning
my station, channel 10 news,

came into possession
of a videotape

of a grateful dead concert
from 1971

that shows you smoking
marijuana.

Do you have any comment?

as I recall...
It was an excellent show.

yeah. Ok.

Didn't you guys do a
background check on bronsteen?

Yes, but forgot
to ask the question,

"have you ever smoked
a doobie on film?"

Hi! I saw you on tv!

Katie couric's got
nothing on you.

Oh, thank you, Roberta.

I can't believe the response I've
gotten from being on that show.

I have a by-line in the paper
four or five times a week,

and then I'm on tv once, and I'm getting
calls from my parents, old roommates.

Even my High school
boyfriend called.

That's a lot of calls.

And you won't believe this.

The local abc affiliate
wants me to audition today.

You should do that.
You'd be great.

What should I wear?
My pinstripe suit, maybe?

Uh, yeah, that'd be good.

That new blue dress I got?

Uh, yeah, I like that one.

Or I could just go as a pirate.

Eye patch, sword, hook.

Yeah, that would work.

Did you say something
about a hook?

You caught me.

I'm sorry, honey.
I'd love to enjoy this with you,

but I can't stop thinking,
like, how do I keep the mayor

from becoming a centerfold
in hightimes magazine.

It's okay.
Just wish me luck.

Luck? You don't need luck.
You're gonna kill 'em.

Wait a minute,
what High school boyfriend?

James is in your office
with professor bronsteen.

I hope you put him
in the nonsmoking section.

Michael.
I just wanted to tell you

how sorry I am
about everything.

I didn't even know
a tape existed.

It was 25 years ago.

Yet on television,
it looks like yesterday.

Another miracle of videotape.

Now, Michael, I know we're both

in a pretty tight spot
here, but

if you're game,
I'm ready to fight this.

Oh, we're game.

In fact, I'll bet we've
already got a game plan.

Uh, yeah, there will be
a nice show of support.

We'll make a few calls
we've even got

a few public service
announcements planned.

Public service announcements?

Yeah, like, "stay off drugs...

Take it from someone
who's been there. "

We're still working on it.

I think I understand.

Joel.

Michael.

Don't worry about a thing, sir.

We'll get going
on this right away.

Mike is a genius
at things like this.

I can tell.

Man, that was great
seeing you guys together.

You two are, like, the biggest
influences in my life,

and I'm embarrassing you.

Let me go get started
on these announcements.

Well, I've got one.

Bronsteen will put
a chicken in every pot...

And also put some pot
in every chicken.

Little joke there.

We're gonna do this.

thanks, Mike.

You really are the best.

I do understand the board of
education's position, ma'am,

but seriously, if you consider
the time frame involved

and the nature of
professor bronsteen's offense,

I mean, it's really...

It's really no worse
than a speeding ticket.

And-and-and we've all gotten our share
of speeding tickets, right, ma'am?

Really.

Spotless record.

Congratulations.

Well, actually, it's more
like a parking ticket.

Not a one.

Wow. You do...

You do...
You drive a car, ma'am?

Ok. Great. Well,
what professor bronsteen did,

it's really a lot like...

Driving a car.

I really don't know how, ma'am.

Why are you still doing this?

It's a long story.

Mike, we've got a list
of 10 other candidates,

all of them as qualified
as bronsteen,

and I'll bet at least 7 of
them have never smoked pot.

Not on film, anyway.

Hell, Jenkins is 85.

Worst case there, he's
addicted to metamucil.

You are so sensitive, Stuart.

We ought to send you out to
the senior citizens homes.

Hey, I'm just trying to help.

You have fun tonight.

Hey, Stuart.

Yeah.

Got a copy of that list?

I thought you'd never ask.

The mayor's in your office.

We got the latest
approval ratings?

Right here, Mike.

No. This is a mistake.

These are
the disapproval ratings.

How bad can it be this time?

Ohhh...

This focus group report you
guys gave me is ridiculous,

and I am not going to pander

to the whims of
a few disgruntled-

hoo-ah.

But they want
to change my hair.

Nothing drastic, sir.

Just a slow, gradual fade
to a more youthful Brown.

So it's about age.

Not age, sir.
Perception... of age.

Look at Dick Clark.
Not a Gray hair on his head,

and he's as popular today
as he was 100 years ago.

They don't like my
gestures, my cadence...

My height.

Are you sure they have

the right Randall Winston here?

Actually, sir,
they prefer "Randy. "

Randy?

Only 2 people in my life
have ever called me Randy-

my wife and my...

Basketball coach.

Still rings in my ears.

"Hey, Randy,
go back door. "

I'm guessing
that was your coach.

Look, sir, I know these seem
like superficial issues,

but you've seen the numbers,

and as crazy as it seems,

if we don't do something
to boost your image,

everything we're working towards
is in serious Jeopardy.

excuse me. Mike?
I'm sorry.

The press is on me
like locusts,

and every question's
about bronsteen.

Did he inhale?
Did he exhale?

Did he roll his own, or did
he smoke it out of a gong?

Please just consider
these suggestions.

Yeah, but too tall.
How do I work with that?

Look, this office
does not revolve

around one man's
adolescent indiscretions.

There are other
more positive things

we are focusing on here.

We're opening a new
subway station today.

James, do you have that speech?

All right. Uh...

"As you shuffle down
into this gaping hole... "

"... to be driven
into a dark abyss,

try not to be overwhelmed by the
insignificance of your life. "

Say, that's inspiring.

Sorry, Mike. I guess
I'm a little depressed.

You can't let this bronsteen
thing affect your work.

Mike, this is unfair.

He's getting
raked over the coals

for something that
happened 20 years ago.

There's not a lot
we can do about it.

You said there'd be
a show of support for him.

Yes, yes, a show of support,

not actual support.

That's why they call it a show.

You seen cats?

Those are not real cats.

You don't feel a bit guilty

about any of this?

Feel?

This is politics, James.

I receive.
I sense the mood of the public,

I respond, I shape it.

I don't have time to feel.

So that's the way it works?

That's the only way it works.

Mike, I lost you there on
"sense the mood of the people. "

How does that work?

Okay, look for
the red light on the camera,

and action.

See that? You haven't
even said a word,

and already I'm loving it.

Action, Ashley.
Please.

You still haven't said a word.

And yet I'm still riveted.

You do eventually speak, right?

Could I just get
some water, please?

Thank you.

oop! Oopsy-Daisy.

Okay. I'm ready.

Uh... police today
apprehend the, uh...

Oh, wait, I'm sorry. Do I-um...
do I stick to an inverse-

Cut!
No. I-

hey. Great!

Bravo! Bravo!

Ahh, nice try, Mike.

No, no, come on. Hey,

there was a rawness there,
a humanity.

People want to watch news and say,
"hey, I could do that, too. "

And you gave that to them.

Do you think I should try again?
They offered me another audition.

They did? They-
of course they did.

Yeah. What do you think?

Well, I think
that you should do

whatever it is
you think you should do.

Come on, I want your opinion.

Mine?

Do you see anyone else
in the room?

No.

I wish I did.

Okay, I think that
you should go for it.

So you're saying
I should just pick up

and leave the job
at the paper that I love.

No. You know what? No.

No, you love that paper.

You should stay there
forever and ever.

But what if this is the greatest
opportunity of my life, you know?

ahhh...

This is unbelievable!
You're not even trying!

Are you kidding me?
I'm working my ass off here.

Mayor in yet this morning, janelle?

Not yet.

Listen, James,
I'm sorry about, uh...

Don't even worry about it.
It's nothin'.

Great.
Nice suit.

We have a problem with the
certificate we're supposed to give

to the transit authority
employee of the month.

Problem? Us?
You gotta be kidding.

They just arrested
the employee.

Apparently he masterminded

a $4 million token
laundering scheme.

How'd they catch him?

Uh, his wife turned him in.

So now it's
the transit authority...

Spouse of the month.

My thought exactly.

Thanks.

You got that, Carter?

Uh-huh. Yeah.

Mike, I need your help here.

Yeah. What you got?

Chief nader says
the fire department

won't co-sponsor the mayor's
neighborhood safety program.

Tell you what.
Rewrite the proposal.

Call it the nader initiative.

We'll let him take credit for it
as long as he stays on the team.

Nader's a sweet old guy.

He's just concerned about
his own job security.

Yeah, well, he should be.

He keeps yanking us, he'll find
himself out on the street.

The man's either with us
or against us, period.

obi-Mike
has taught you well,

but, Luke, I am your father.

T minus 30 minutes.

Mike, any change on our
position on bronsteen?

No. No, we, uh,
we still-

we gotta let him go.

But, uh, we're going
to do it gently.

We're going to go
to bat for him.

We'll highlight his distinguished
career as an educator.

He's still a friend
of this administration.

Whoa. What are you talking about?
We gotta dump this guy.

Excuse me?

Well... I hate to interrupt
your violin solo,

but in case you haven't noticed,
we've been taking on water.

This guy bronsteen's just an anchor, Mike.
He's dragging us down.

James, I know that's not how
you feel about the guy.

I'm sorry.
Feel?

I thought we went
over this, Mike.

This is politics.
We really don't have time to feel.

What happened to old James?

I miss him.
I want him back.

you can't have him back.

He's come over
to the dark side,

and together we shall rule
city hall as father and son.

Hey, James.

What?

Easy, young Skywalker.

I come in peace.

Want a drink?
I'm buying.

Fine. I'll take
a rum and coke.

Since when do you drink rum?

Ok. Just a coke.

2 cokes, please.

Why don't you take off your
tie and relax a little?

Mike, I'm comfortable.

When was the last time
you wore one of those?

My sister's wedding.

She's been married
several times.

I'm getting used to it.

Is this your first
real job, James?

Oh, God.
Did you come over here to fire me?

No. I usually do that sort
of thing over the phone.

I remember my first real job.

It was in the office
of this, uh,

state senator from Brooklyn.

My first day at work,

this little old Lady comes in.

She's, like, this big.

No. I swear to God.

I held her in the palm of
my hand the whole time.

She's really mad because
she's got this streetlight

outside her bedroom window,

and it keeps blinking.

"Blink, blink, blink all night long.
It's driving me crazy. "

So anyway, she wants it fixed.

She doesn't care
if it's on or off.

She just, you know,
not with the blinking.

So, what happened?

Oh, I don't remember.

That's a beautiful story.

My point is this, James.

Every morning in this city,

8 million people wake up,
turn on their faucets,

they want to see clean, fresh
water coming out of there.

They want, you know,
safe streets.

They want clean subways,
good football teams,

and when they don't get
them, they get mad.

And when they get mad,
they come to me.

Mike?

The water in my faucet
comes out Brown.

This is what I'm saying.

So if I were to take
all the Brown water

and all the blinking lights,

if I were to take
that personally,

I would probably be very,
very sad most of the time.

But, Mike...

It's really, really Brown.

James, take it up
with your super.

You don't have
any time to feel?

I get happy, sad, and hungry.

Every once in a while I'll let a
little something else slip through.

Bronsteen?

Maybe.

Mike, it's just
such a damn shame.

Well, James, you're going
to carry that pain with you

a lot longer than I am

'cause you're
different than me.

And, uh, that's ok.

Sometimes I wish, uh,
I was different from me.

Really?

nah.

I know you're excited I got
the job, but this is ridiculous.

Oh, come on,
come on. One more time.

Please.
Mike.

No, that's enough.

Ashley, Ashley.

You are sick.
There is something wrong with you.

Uh-huh.

Oh, for God's sake,
all right.

This is Ashley schaeffer reporting
live for channel 10 news.

Today police are investigating the
disappearance of more than two million dollars

in municipal funds from
a Nassau county armed truck.

Oh, baby!

Sit, ubu, sit.
Good dog.

Moo.

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