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WWW.MY-SUBS.CO
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You're early.
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- Synced and corrected by naFraC -
- www.MY-SUBS.com -
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Sorry you had to see that.
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So are we.
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Jim, this is the living room.
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Why were your pants down?
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Because the pain isn't in my pants.
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It's in my glute.
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Jim has always had glute issues,
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and, oh, how I've missed them.
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Glute issues come from tension.
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I don't have tension.
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You don't have tension yet.
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But you're marrying Julia,
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so keep one of those in every room.
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- I don't have tension.
- You're asymptomatic,
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but you give it to other people.
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Where are the kids, by the way?
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I left them in the
woods with some bread.
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That was three days ago.
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Jimmy's playing video
games, and Grace is on TikTok
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watching hamsters get married.
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And our children's futures
grow brighter by the moment.
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Yeah, item one, Jimmy's school
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gave the kids a career aptitude test,
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and it said he should be an evangelist.
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- Jesus.
- Exactly.
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He seems excited about
it, so that's good.
29
00:02:03,707 --> 00:02:06,418
Although personally, I think
those tests are deeply flawed.
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I remember my test.
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It said I should run
for governor someday.
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Mine said I should map the human genome.
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What about yours, Jim? What'd it say?
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Doesn't matter.
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Come on.
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It doesn't...
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cranberry farmer.
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Oh, come on.
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I was an 11-year-old boy.
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I just happened to have
a bladder infection.
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- No.
- Hey.
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Yes, boys can get them.
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Boys have bladders,
and they get infected.
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Whatever. It's fine.
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It's fine.
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Okay, item number two.
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As you know, it is Grace's
14th birthday tomorrow,
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so I booked our special
booth at Stornelli's.
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Trey, you're gonna love this place.
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Family style, spaghetti and meatballs,
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big portions, bottomless bread basket.
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And it is my treat.
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No arguments, okay?
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So come hungry and leave
that big wallet at home.
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Actually, this year, we have an upgrade.
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- An upgrade?
- Tell him.
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I got us into Takane.
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Isn't that fantastic?
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Oh, my God, that is so fa...
what is Takane?
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00:03:06,311 --> 00:03:09,105
A new sushi place that
no one can get into.
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No one? How are they in business?
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Well, no one but Trey.
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He made a call.
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I was happy to do it for you.
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And for you, but most of all, for Grace.
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And of course, it'll be my treat.
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Thank you, my love.
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Yes, thank you, her love.
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But, Trey...
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and I don't blame you
for this, because clearly,
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Julia did not tell you. She's very busy.
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The Kearney family always
has birthdays at Stornelli's.
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Our pictures are on the
wall, for God's sakes.
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Jim, this is Takane.
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I "understand-ay."
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Grace will love it.
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She's always been a foodie.
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Even all the way back
in her nursing days,
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she strictly preferred the
left breast to the right.
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I go back and forth.
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Yes, you do.
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Hey, hey, I'm right here.
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Okay, so did Grace actually tell you
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she doesn't want to go
to Stornelli's anymore?
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She didn't have to tell me. I know.
86
00:04:01,731 --> 00:04:02,773
You don't know what Grace knows,
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00:04:02,784 --> 00:04:04,018
and you know you don't know.
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00:04:04,029 --> 00:04:06,031
And I know you know you don't know.
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- We're going to Stornelli's.
- Takane.
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- Stornelli's.
- Jim.
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00:04:08,736 --> 00:04:10,113
- Julia.
- Trey.
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00:04:18,977 --> 00:04:21,917
Now, when Julia and I
carefully and painstakingly
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00:04:21,928 --> 00:04:23,763
mapped out our post-divorce life,
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00:04:23,774 --> 00:04:25,859
we may have failed to
consider a few tiny things.
95
00:04:25,870 --> 00:04:29,332
Like birthdays, graduations,
vacations, first communions,
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baptisms, Mother's Day, Father's Day,
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Labor Day, Arbor Day.
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00:04:32,561 --> 00:04:34,480
Okay, now you're just naming days.
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00:04:34,691 --> 00:04:36,557
So there we were, on
our first major occasion,
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00:04:36,568 --> 00:04:37,819
at an unpredictable impasse.
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00:04:37,892 --> 00:04:39,351
It was completely predictable.
102
00:04:39,362 --> 00:04:40,572
People have birthdays every year.
103
00:04:40,613 --> 00:04:42,240
Or like Julia, every three years.
104
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That's true.
105
00:04:43,575 --> 00:04:45,568
So smart people would have said,
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- "Hey, let's take a breath."
- "Let's think it through."
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"Let's figure this out
like mature adults."
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But that's not who we are.
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We are the Kearneys.
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00:04:54,240 --> 00:04:57,077
How could you say yes to Takane
without even consulting me?
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00:04:57,287 --> 00:04:58,942
Because I thought you'd be thrilled.
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Every time we go to Stornelli's,
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the meatballs give you diarrhea.
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Yes, but it's diarrhea by choice.
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00:05:05,889 --> 00:05:08,641
A personal sacrifice I make
in the name of parenthood.
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A hill I both create and die on.
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You're welcome.
118
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Can you imagine a woman
would ever tire of this man?
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Jim, I am sorry.
120
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I should have consulted you.
121
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No! You didn't do anything wrong.
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All you did was make a birthday plan
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for his daughter, your
soon-to-be stepdaughter,
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00:05:27,118 --> 00:05:28,337
without asking him.
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- You didn't say I had to ask him.
- I didn't think we had to ask him.
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Well, you had to ask him.
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00:05:32,705 --> 00:05:35,458
Okay, Jim, can we take Grace to Takane?
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00:05:35,633 --> 00:05:36,789
No.
129
00:05:37,883 --> 00:05:40,117
This is ridiculous.
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This man, this generous man,
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calls in a giant favor for our Grace,
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and all you can do is swat it away?
133
00:05:47,108 --> 00:05:48,860
How do you sleep at night?
134
00:05:48,871 --> 00:05:50,245
I close my eyes.
135
00:05:50,256 --> 00:05:51,309
Sometimes I...
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00:05:51,351 --> 00:05:53,103
You know what I mean.
137
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Ah! Ah! Give me that thing.
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00:05:54,963 --> 00:05:55,988
Ah!
139
00:05:56,272 --> 00:05:58,108
Look, I'm sure Takane is great,
140
00:05:58,119 --> 00:06:00,277
and I'm not saying I enjoy the diarrhea.
141
00:06:00,288 --> 00:06:01,998
It would worry me if you did.
142
00:06:02,131 --> 00:06:04,300
But we are talking about tradition here.
143
00:06:04,311 --> 00:06:06,652
And in this family,
our birthday tradition
144
00:06:06,663 --> 00:06:08,122
is we dine at Stornelli's,
145
00:06:08,133 --> 00:06:10,010
and then I go home and uncork my bowels.
146
00:06:11,121 --> 00:06:13,623
The hell kind of tradition is that?
147
00:06:13,665 --> 00:06:14,916
That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
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00:06:14,958 --> 00:06:16,501
I don't even know what to say anymore.
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What kind of conversation is this?
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00:06:19,137 --> 00:06:22,068
The kind of conversation you
can only have with Jim Kearney.
151
00:06:22,079 --> 00:06:23,914
- I overstepped.
- We should go with Jim's plan.
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00:06:23,955 --> 00:06:26,261
Well, I think Jim's overstepped,
and we should go with your plan.
153
00:06:26,272 --> 00:06:28,007
Well, I think you overstepped,
and we should go with my plan.
154
00:06:28,018 --> 00:06:30,716
And that makes one vote for
Takane and two votes for Stornelli's.
155
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Stornelli's it is. Prepare the toilets!
156
00:06:34,759 --> 00:06:37,011
Oh, oh, oh, no, no,
not so fast, big guy.
157
00:06:37,022 --> 00:06:38,356
I think we should let Grace decide.
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00:06:38,398 --> 00:06:39,817
Mm. Great idea.
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00:06:39,828 --> 00:06:41,622
We'll force our daughter to
choose between her parents,
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00:06:41,776 --> 00:06:43,069
and then for her birthday present,
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00:06:43,111 --> 00:06:45,238
we'll get her a big box of therapy.
162
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This is bad.
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Can I just ask,
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how do they never notice the phone?
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Shh!
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If my career test was right,
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these people are my flock.
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00:06:54,748 --> 00:06:57,083
But goodness gracious,
do they need help.
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Whatever Grace decides,
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00:06:59,878 --> 00:07:02,756
we will all accept it with a smile.
171
00:07:02,797 --> 00:07:04,758
Why is Mom vibrating?
172
00:07:04,769 --> 00:07:06,688
Trey, you have hijacked
my daughter's birthday.
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00:07:06,699 --> 00:07:08,397
You are a daughter's birthday hijacker.
174
00:07:08,408 --> 00:07:10,085
I thought I was doing a nice thing.
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00:07:10,096 --> 00:07:12,098
Do you have any idea
how many tragic stories
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have started with those seven words?
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00:07:13,549 --> 00:07:14,689
Eight words.
178
00:07:14,700 --> 00:07:17,370
Ugh, fine. It'll be all up to Grace.
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00:07:17,911 --> 00:07:20,357
No matter what I choose, I'll
be disappointing somebody.
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00:07:20,428 --> 00:07:22,806
Well, it's your own fault
for having a birthday
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00:07:22,817 --> 00:07:24,611
so soon after the divorce.
182
00:07:24,652 --> 00:07:26,237
That's a stupid thing to say.
183
00:07:26,310 --> 00:07:29,157
What do you want?
My dad was a cranberry farmer.
184
00:07:30,857 --> 00:07:32,577
I wish I knew what to do.
185
00:07:32,588 --> 00:07:34,038
- Pray with me.
- Stop it.
186
00:07:35,733 --> 00:07:38,186
- Oh, Takane has a website.
- Stornelli's doesn't.
187
00:07:38,197 --> 00:07:40,919
Well, if it did,
it would redirect to Poison Control.
188
00:07:41,541 --> 00:07:44,589
Oh, but Takane looks incredible.
189
00:07:46,528 --> 00:07:47,779
Okay, decision made.
190
00:07:47,790 --> 00:07:49,291
We're going to Takane.
191
00:07:49,302 --> 00:07:51,388
- Dad's gonna be crushed.
- Uh, don't worry.
192
00:07:51,429 --> 00:07:53,139
I have a plan.
193
00:07:53,150 --> 00:07:55,152
The Lord does too.
194
00:07:55,418 --> 00:07:56,715
What's yours?
195
00:07:56,726 --> 00:07:58,645
I'm not telling you,
in case it doesn't work.
196
00:07:58,687 --> 00:08:01,022
Well, that's not very reassuring.
197
00:08:01,277 --> 00:08:04,030
You know, for a preacher,
you don't have much faith.
198
00:08:05,244 --> 00:08:06,778
I had to break the news to Dad.
199
00:08:06,851 --> 00:08:09,061
He took it pretty well, considering.
200
00:08:09,327 --> 00:08:10,456
Yeah.
201
00:08:10,467 --> 00:08:11,827
Takane.
202
00:08:12,158 --> 00:08:13,827
Great, Grace.
203
00:08:14,313 --> 00:08:16,246
Well, anyway, he took it.
204
00:08:16,287 --> 00:08:17,492
That was the easy part.
205
00:08:17,503 --> 00:08:19,226
The real test has yet to come.
206
00:08:24,849 --> 00:08:26,095
You know what?
207
00:08:26,106 --> 00:08:27,524
- This place feels right.
- Mm.
208
00:08:27,535 --> 00:08:29,753
Even the fish in the tank
look happy to be here.
209
00:08:30,039 --> 00:08:31,469
And they're gonna be dead in 20 minutes.
210
00:08:31,511 --> 00:08:32,929
Oh, not those bad boys.
211
00:08:32,971 --> 00:08:35,181
Those are koi, the jewel of the water.
212
00:08:35,367 --> 00:08:37,142
$20,000 each.
213
00:08:37,584 --> 00:08:39,019
To be worth $20,000,
214
00:08:39,060 --> 00:08:40,520
a fish would have to play the banjo.
215
00:08:41,858 --> 00:08:44,001
Dad, are you sure you're
happy we came here?
216
00:08:44,012 --> 00:08:46,056
Does the Pope crap in the woods?
217
00:08:46,067 --> 00:08:48,695
Don't talk about my boss like that.
218
00:08:48,737 --> 00:08:50,865
No, I'm happy.
219
00:08:50,876 --> 00:08:51,876
- Really?
- Mm-hmm.
220
00:08:51,887 --> 00:08:52,896
'Cause you're tapping your lips like
221
00:08:52,907 --> 00:08:54,117
you want to say something,
222
00:08:54,128 --> 00:08:55,659
but you can't let it out.
223
00:08:55,670 --> 00:08:56,870
Oh, no, I'm simply
224
00:08:56,911 --> 00:08:58,788
preparing my lips to receive fish.
225
00:08:58,830 --> 00:09:00,457
Summon the waiter. My lips are ready.
226
00:09:00,498 --> 00:09:02,125
Oh, there'll be no ordering.
227
00:09:02,167 --> 00:09:04,836
The chef decides the whole
meal, start to finish.
228
00:09:04,878 --> 00:09:06,004
Wait, what if I don't like it?
229
00:09:06,046 --> 00:09:07,797
Then the Lord will smite you.
230
00:09:08,307 --> 00:09:10,087
- Ooh.
- Oh.
231
00:09:10,098 --> 00:09:11,194
Oh, my God.
232
00:09:11,205 --> 00:09:13,040
This is the uni with dandelion.
233
00:09:13,426 --> 00:09:16,033
Oh. A little on the petite side.
234
00:09:16,754 --> 00:09:18,214
The better to be delectable.
235
00:09:18,225 --> 00:09:19,236
Uh-huh.
236
00:09:19,247 --> 00:09:21,541
Does uni have a big brother?
237
00:09:21,782 --> 00:09:23,772
- You're gonna love it, Jim.
- Okay.
238
00:09:23,813 --> 00:09:25,440
Come here there, little tyke.
239
00:09:25,482 --> 00:09:26,983
Let's see what all the fuss is about
240
00:09:27,025 --> 00:09:29,694
and if the mortgage-like
prices are justified
241
00:09:29,705 --> 00:09:31,904
by the flavor of this
itty-bitty, little...
242
00:09:31,915 --> 00:09:33,198
oh, dear glory.
243
00:09:33,209 --> 00:09:34,586
That is the best thing I've ever tasted.
244
00:09:36,003 --> 00:09:38,464
And now we know why
Jesus multiplied the fish.
245
00:09:40,056 --> 00:09:41,683
Why don't we go look at the koi?
246
00:09:41,694 --> 00:09:44,542
I need more food first, or
I won't survive the journey.
247
00:09:44,553 --> 00:09:46,680
Okay, well, why don't
we go look at the koi,
248
00:09:46,691 --> 00:09:48,484
and we can give the
adults a chance to talk?
249
00:09:48,501 --> 00:09:49,949
I can see them from here.
250
00:09:49,960 --> 00:09:51,814
- You done with your dandelion?
- Why don't we go look at...
251
00:09:51,825 --> 00:09:53,123
Look at the koi.
252
00:09:53,134 --> 00:09:54,636
Oh, I get it now.
253
00:09:54,647 --> 00:09:55,814
Ow, ow!
254
00:09:55,825 --> 00:09:57,660
Grace, Grace, easy on his ear.
255
00:09:57,870 --> 00:10:00,309
Jim, I gotta say, I am so happy
256
00:10:00,320 --> 00:10:01,768
that you're enjoying this meal.
257
00:10:01,779 --> 00:10:03,864
Anybody with a mouth
would enjoy the meal.
258
00:10:04,160 --> 00:10:05,376
That was never the issue.
259
00:10:05,387 --> 00:10:07,691
I know. The issue was
about not being consulted,
260
00:10:07,702 --> 00:10:08,980
and I am sorry about that.
261
00:10:08,991 --> 00:10:10,855
No, that wasn't the issue.
262
00:10:10,866 --> 00:10:12,612
- That wasn't the issue?
- Oh, I know.
263
00:10:12,654 --> 00:10:14,155
The issue was about changing tradition.
264
00:10:14,305 --> 00:10:16,199
Yeah, that wasn't the issue, either.
265
00:10:16,293 --> 00:10:18,175
Oh. It wasn't?
266
00:10:18,186 --> 00:10:19,994
Well, it was part of the issue,
but it wasn't the issue.
267
00:10:20,036 --> 00:10:21,287
Okay, Jim, well, what was the issue?
268
00:10:21,329 --> 00:10:22,997
Because the restaurant
closes at midnight.
269
00:10:23,602 --> 00:10:24,874
Ah. No need to talk about it.
270
00:10:24,916 --> 00:10:26,292
I gotta go to the men's room.
271
00:10:26,334 --> 00:10:27,738
This place seems like the kind of place
272
00:10:27,749 --> 00:10:29,180
that would have a
large tip jar in there.
273
00:10:29,191 --> 00:10:30,547
What's the standard gratuity, Trey?
274
00:10:30,588 --> 00:10:32,382
About 4 grand?
275
00:10:32,424 --> 00:10:35,260
Like many of us, Jim has
issues discussing his issues.
276
00:10:35,301 --> 00:10:38,179
Oh, no, I have no such
issues, or issue issues.
277
00:10:38,251 --> 00:10:40,879
I'm so glad, because
we are all a family now.
278
00:10:40,890 --> 00:10:43,226
That's right, and families
rely on communication.
279
00:10:43,268 --> 00:10:46,312
And communication relies
on emotional exhibitionism.
280
00:10:46,354 --> 00:10:48,481
Yes, so, Jim,
281
00:10:48,554 --> 00:10:51,140
if you need to take off
your emotional pants,
282
00:10:51,510 --> 00:10:56,640
I want you to know I'm here for you.
283
00:10:58,314 --> 00:11:00,232
It is spectacularly clear to me
284
00:11:00,243 --> 00:11:03,079
that you two were meant for each other.
285
00:11:03,090 --> 00:11:04,717
Uh, can I write a
check in the men's room?
286
00:11:04,789 --> 00:11:06,838
Do you know? Or Venmo?
287
00:11:07,667 --> 00:11:09,377
You seem agitated, Jim.
288
00:11:09,419 --> 00:11:11,463
You shouldn't pee agitated.
289
00:11:11,504 --> 00:11:13,132
That's how mistakes are made.
290
00:11:13,143 --> 00:11:14,811
Bad for the shoes.
291
00:11:15,222 --> 00:11:17,284
Look, the issue was
292
00:11:17,295 --> 00:11:19,721
that we didn't know what Grace wanted,
and then we found out.
293
00:11:19,732 --> 00:11:22,026
Grace wanted Takane, and so we are here.
294
00:11:22,160 --> 00:11:23,870
Grace is happy, and
therefore I am happy.
295
00:11:23,881 --> 00:11:25,934
My heart is full, and as it happens,
296
00:11:25,945 --> 00:11:27,519
so is my bladder. Excuse me.
297
00:11:30,512 --> 00:11:32,222
Babe, I know I don't
speak fluent Jim yet,
298
00:11:32,233 --> 00:11:33,943
but that does not seem like a happy man.
299
00:11:33,985 --> 00:11:35,779
Yeah. Did... did I miss something?
300
00:11:35,893 --> 00:11:37,353
I didn't, did I? No.
301
00:11:37,402 --> 00:11:39,404
Did I? No.
302
00:11:41,309 --> 00:11:42,844
Repeat after me.
303
00:11:43,203 --> 00:11:44,682
Tartar sauce.
304
00:11:45,330 --> 00:11:47,248
Hey, um, Reverend?
305
00:11:47,512 --> 00:11:48,792
Yes, child?
306
00:11:48,833 --> 00:11:51,503
I think one of your flock needs you.
307
00:11:52,003 --> 00:11:53,380
Look, I'm not gonna deny it, you know?
308
00:11:53,421 --> 00:11:55,465
Trey's money allows him
to do things for the kids
309
00:11:55,476 --> 00:11:56,894
that I could never do.
310
00:11:56,905 --> 00:11:59,742
When he's around, it's
hard not to feel less than.
311
00:11:59,753 --> 00:12:01,213
But am I supposed to just capitulate?
312
00:12:01,346 --> 00:12:03,390
You know, stick out
a limp, supplicant paw
313
00:12:03,401 --> 00:12:04,728
and say, "Thank you, Trey,
314
00:12:04,739 --> 00:12:06,694
how do we ever have a
happy day without you?"
315
00:12:08,044 --> 00:12:09,784
Fatherhood, man.
316
00:12:09,795 --> 00:12:11,277
What a ride.
317
00:12:12,555 --> 00:12:14,724
I mean, birthdays and youth soccer
318
00:12:14,735 --> 00:12:17,515
and, well, violin recitals.
319
00:12:17,526 --> 00:12:19,823
You ever listen to a
five-year-old play violin?
320
00:12:20,083 --> 00:12:21,199
It's horrible.
321
00:12:21,210 --> 00:12:22,369
Horrible.
322
00:12:22,380 --> 00:12:24,174
You can feel it in your teeth.
323
00:12:24,473 --> 00:12:25,682
But you suck it up.
324
00:12:25,693 --> 00:12:27,528
You take video. Later,
you watch the video.
325
00:12:27,539 --> 00:12:29,082
Your teeth hurt again.
326
00:12:29,124 --> 00:12:32,002
But it doesn't matter
because it's your daughter,
327
00:12:32,287 --> 00:12:33,622
and you're her dad.
328
00:12:35,349 --> 00:12:37,559
And then one day, the owner
of your favorite sports team
329
00:12:37,632 --> 00:12:38,925
falls in love with your ex-wife,
330
00:12:38,967 --> 00:12:41,174
and your daughter forgets all about you.
331
00:12:41,428 --> 00:12:42,595
It hurts.
332
00:12:42,606 --> 00:12:44,525
It really hurts.
333
00:12:44,597 --> 00:12:46,224
Any advice?
334
00:12:46,766 --> 00:12:48,727
Yeah, I got some advice.
335
00:12:50,395 --> 00:12:53,690
Don't talk to strangers
in the men's room.
336
00:12:54,001 --> 00:12:55,294
You said, "How's it going?"
337
00:12:55,305 --> 00:12:56,681
And you're supposed to say, "Good,"
338
00:12:56,692 --> 00:12:58,028
and that's the end of it.
339
00:12:58,039 --> 00:13:00,417
Did I tell you that
this is not my real leg?
340
00:13:00,428 --> 00:13:01,926
Or how I lost my real leg?
341
00:13:01,937 --> 00:13:04,356
How much I miss my real leg?
342
00:13:04,698 --> 00:13:07,662
- No, you did not.
- Did I tell you about my future son-in-law,
343
00:13:07,704 --> 00:13:08,955
the love of my daughter's life,
344
00:13:08,966 --> 00:13:12,177
who has a spider tattoo on his face?
345
00:13:12,216 --> 00:13:13,324
Not on his neck.
346
00:13:13,335 --> 00:13:14,586
On his face.
347
00:13:14,627 --> 00:13:15,879
Right here.
348
00:13:15,920 --> 00:13:18,423
Daddy long legs.
349
00:13:18,525 --> 00:13:19,859
I did not say that to you.
350
00:13:19,967 --> 00:13:21,010
You know why?
351
00:13:21,022 --> 00:13:22,344
Because you don't do it.
352
00:13:22,385 --> 00:13:23,846
Not in a men's room.
353
00:13:23,857 --> 00:13:27,198
We've been in here so long,
I almost have to go again,
354
00:13:27,209 --> 00:13:30,755
but I am leaving because
this has been so unpleasant.
355
00:13:32,121 --> 00:13:34,230
Wow. Whatever happened
to the kindness of strangers?
356
00:13:34,272 --> 00:13:36,066
We're not strangers anymore.
357
00:13:36,077 --> 00:13:37,787
I wish we were strangers.
358
00:13:37,940 --> 00:13:40,236
We were meant to be strangers.
359
00:13:40,457 --> 00:13:43,293
I know more about your
kids than I do my own!
360
00:13:51,620 --> 00:13:53,622
It smells like dandelions in here.
361
00:13:53,792 --> 00:13:55,251
Jimmy, never enter a men's room
362
00:13:55,293 --> 00:13:57,796
and say anything like that again.
363
00:13:58,143 --> 00:13:59,574
Copy that.
364
00:14:05,303 --> 00:14:08,014
How you feeling about
your career aptitude test?
365
00:14:08,056 --> 00:14:09,641
Do you know what you'll
be when you grow up?
366
00:14:09,893 --> 00:14:11,352
Hopefully at the big urinal.
367
00:14:11,363 --> 00:14:12,614
This one's humiliating.
368
00:14:12,632 --> 00:14:13,937
Hmm.
369
00:14:14,061 --> 00:14:16,022
Well, if the preaching
thing doesn't work out,
370
00:14:16,104 --> 00:14:18,023
you should give the
finance business a shot.
371
00:14:18,399 --> 00:14:20,068
What's the finance business?
372
00:14:20,110 --> 00:14:22,821
It's what Trey did before
he bought the Celtics.
373
00:14:22,862 --> 00:14:24,364
Now he can buy whatever he wants...
374
00:14:24,406 --> 00:14:27,450
basketball teams, people's affections,
375
00:14:27,591 --> 00:14:31,136
teeny-tiny pieces of
inarguably sublime fish.
376
00:14:32,016 --> 00:14:33,796
Yeah, if I could do it all over again,
377
00:14:33,807 --> 00:14:38,294
I'd have majored in finance
instead of beer pong.
378
00:14:38,336 --> 00:14:41,006
But let me tell you, if beer
pong ever goes professional,
379
00:14:41,017 --> 00:14:44,813
I'm buying the Red Sox,
and a cranberry farm.
380
00:14:46,645 --> 00:14:48,972
But if you'd done anything differently,
381
00:14:48,983 --> 00:14:51,057
then you wouldn't have been you.
382
00:14:51,068 --> 00:14:55,447
You wouldn't have married
Mom, and I wouldn't exist.
383
00:14:55,613 --> 00:14:58,157
You'd be peeing next to
some other kid right now.
384
00:14:59,232 --> 00:15:02,277
That's... you make a good point.
385
00:15:03,726 --> 00:15:05,436
Maybe you should be a preacher.
386
00:15:05,447 --> 00:15:06,628
You done?
387
00:15:06,639 --> 00:15:08,136
I've been done for a while, Dad.
388
00:15:08,147 --> 00:15:09,440
I just like talking to you.
389
00:15:13,064 --> 00:15:14,673
For the first time in history,
390
00:15:14,684 --> 00:15:16,530
my brother did what I wanted him to,
391
00:15:16,541 --> 00:15:19,961
and I didn't even have to
threaten physical violence.
392
00:15:20,003 --> 00:15:21,629
So we were back on track.
393
00:15:21,640 --> 00:15:24,351
But the most important part
of the plan was still ahead.
394
00:15:24,424 --> 00:15:27,385
I know my family, and I knew
what was about to happen.
395
00:15:27,593 --> 00:15:29,700
And I would be ready when it did.
396
00:15:32,542 --> 00:15:36,884
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
397
00:15:36,895 --> 00:15:38,927
♪ Ooh ♪
398
00:15:38,938 --> 00:15:40,357
Grace, blow out the birthday candle.
399
00:15:40,398 --> 00:15:42,525
Go easy, though. The whole
thing could sail across the room.
400
00:15:45,633 --> 00:15:46,866
Hey!
401
00:15:50,283 --> 00:15:51,743
- Mmm.
- Oh, my God.
402
00:15:51,785 --> 00:15:53,161
- Oh, wow.
- Wow.
403
00:15:53,203 --> 00:15:55,577
- Even the birthday cake is incredible.
- Mmm.
404
00:15:55,588 --> 00:15:58,257
More like a birthday nibble, but yeah.
405
00:15:58,885 --> 00:16:01,211
Oh. At least let me get the tip.
406
00:16:02,311 --> 00:16:03,562
Service wasn't that great.
407
00:16:05,751 --> 00:16:07,169
Wait a second.
408
00:16:07,200 --> 00:16:08,999
- That was the whole meal?
- Mm-hmm.
409
00:16:09,010 --> 00:16:10,595
I thought those were just appetizers.
410
00:16:10,776 --> 00:16:12,027
Reverend, polite.
411
00:16:12,121 --> 00:16:13,682
Reverend starving.
412
00:16:13,723 --> 00:16:14,766
This is a restaurant.
413
00:16:14,808 --> 00:16:16,142
They have a responsibility.
414
00:16:16,184 --> 00:16:17,519
- It's their style.
- Yes.
415
00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:18,793
Famine.
416
00:16:19,699 --> 00:16:20,927
Can I have some French fries?
417
00:16:20,938 --> 00:16:22,501
Nothing here is fried.
418
00:16:22,512 --> 00:16:23,942
What?
419
00:16:24,095 --> 00:16:26,695
Boo! Boo!
420
00:16:26,736 --> 00:16:29,030
Jimmy, Jimmy, Jimmy,
what would Jesus do?
421
00:16:29,072 --> 00:16:31,866
Beats me, but there's
about to be one less koi.
422
00:16:32,000 --> 00:16:33,502
Oh, ooh, ooh, ooh.
423
00:16:36,495 --> 00:16:39,791
So, um, let me ask,
424
00:16:39,802 --> 00:16:42,012
who besides me would really love
425
00:16:42,023 --> 00:16:44,025
some spaghetti and meatballs right now?
426
00:16:50,006 --> 00:16:52,310
I'm not gonna lie.
I could eat my entire arm.
427
00:16:53,054 --> 00:16:56,016
Dad, can you save the day?
428
00:16:57,476 --> 00:17:00,175
Oh, well, it's a little last-minute,
429
00:17:00,186 --> 00:17:03,408
but um, I think I can make a call.
430
00:17:03,838 --> 00:17:05,924
Let's hope Stornelli's has a phone.
431
00:17:08,778 --> 00:17:11,239
I didn't realize how much I
had asked of Jim, you know,
432
00:17:11,281 --> 00:17:13,508
what it... what it
means to a man like him
433
00:17:13,519 --> 00:17:15,396
to be a good dad, the dad,
434
00:17:15,407 --> 00:17:17,535
no matter who else had come along.
435
00:17:17,740 --> 00:17:19,416
You were less than sensitive.
436
00:17:22,098 --> 00:17:23,924
Yes. Thank you.
437
00:17:24,408 --> 00:17:26,118
Uh, but fortunately, our daughter,
438
00:17:26,129 --> 00:17:27,630
despite her demeanor sometimes,
439
00:17:27,641 --> 00:17:30,519
is actually the most
sensitive of us all.
440
00:17:30,902 --> 00:17:32,291
I knew what the best outcome was,
441
00:17:32,302 --> 00:17:35,221
so I manipulated everyone
around me to get it.
442
00:17:35,462 --> 00:17:36,765
I'm so proud.
443
00:17:42,812 --> 00:17:44,397
Mmm.
444
00:17:45,699 --> 00:17:46,866
You know what I'm thinking?
445
00:17:46,877 --> 00:17:48,307
That you've been eating for 45 minutes,
446
00:17:48,318 --> 00:17:50,737
so how come your plate's still full?
447
00:17:50,810 --> 00:17:52,436
It's like the spaghetti is giving birth
448
00:17:52,447 --> 00:17:54,324
- to more spaghetti.
- Mm.
449
00:17:54,396 --> 00:17:56,106
Should we be dreading the aftermath,
450
00:17:56,117 --> 00:17:57,532
little Stornelli's all over the place?
451
00:17:57,543 --> 00:17:59,276
- Nope. Live for the moment.
- Okay.
452
00:17:59,471 --> 00:18:01,765
Actually, I was thinking
453
00:18:01,776 --> 00:18:04,487
that our children will teach us.
454
00:18:07,045 --> 00:18:11,883
Jim, Grace is learning to embrace Trey
455
00:18:12,129 --> 00:18:16,346
because he is a person
very much worth embracing,
456
00:18:16,828 --> 00:18:19,766
and he should be
welcomed into the family
457
00:18:19,808 --> 00:18:22,535
with tenderness and warmth.
458
00:18:22,546 --> 00:18:23,586
- Thank you.
- Still talking.
459
00:18:23,597 --> 00:18:25,432
Sorry.
460
00:18:25,826 --> 00:18:30,443
But she knows that she'll
only ever have one dad.
461
00:18:30,884 --> 00:18:32,404
And now you know she knows.
462
00:18:32,445 --> 00:18:34,239
And she knows you know she knows.
463
00:18:34,280 --> 00:18:36,700
And I know you know she knows she knows.
464
00:18:37,086 --> 00:18:39,994
And that is worth a billion dandelions.
465
00:18:41,075 --> 00:18:42,909
I will keep that in mind.
466
00:18:43,130 --> 00:18:45,656
I sure hope so, because
this was exhausting.
467
00:18:47,521 --> 00:18:49,315
And I promise that next time,
468
00:18:49,326 --> 00:18:52,538
I will be much more considerate of
your feelings before I dismiss them.
469
00:18:52,740 --> 00:18:54,825
That's all I ask, a pause of kindness
470
00:18:54,836 --> 00:18:56,254
before being completely disregarded.
471
00:18:56,295 --> 00:18:57,462
Hmm.
472
00:18:58,584 --> 00:19:00,586
Oh, it's me now?
473
00:19:00,848 --> 00:19:03,517
Because I thought I
handled things pretty well.
474
00:19:05,297 --> 00:19:09,660
Okay. Um, I went to MIT.
475
00:19:09,671 --> 00:19:12,353
Ladies and gentlemen,
the 9:17 MIT mention.
476
00:19:12,364 --> 00:19:14,112
Right on time.
477
00:19:14,214 --> 00:19:19,260
But my real education started
when I joined this family.
478
00:19:20,777 --> 00:19:21,848
What have you learned?
479
00:19:21,859 --> 00:19:23,077
Well, I've learned that
480
00:19:23,088 --> 00:19:25,362
I'd rather be full of pasta
and love at Stornelli's
481
00:19:25,373 --> 00:19:27,625
than hungry and unloved at Takane.
482
00:19:28,539 --> 00:19:30,333
Hallelujah.
483
00:19:33,007 --> 00:19:36,143
Oh. When was the last time somebody
picked up a check for you, Trey?
484
00:19:36,154 --> 00:19:38,053
2002.
485
00:19:38,279 --> 00:19:40,253
Then it's my pleasure.
486
00:19:40,775 --> 00:19:41,852
Thank you.
487
00:19:42,052 --> 00:19:43,953
It's nice having our
picture on the wall.
488
00:19:43,964 --> 00:19:46,884
Well, we're the only ones
who've ever come back.
489
00:19:47,062 --> 00:19:49,231
But maybe it's time for a new picture.
490
00:19:49,568 --> 00:19:50,763
You know what?
491
00:19:50,774 --> 00:19:52,067
You're absolutely right.
492
00:19:52,229 --> 00:19:53,713
- Can I borrow that?
- What?
493
00:19:53,724 --> 00:19:55,476
- Your phone.
- Seriously?
494
00:19:55,487 --> 00:19:57,197
- Just for a second.
- Where are you going?
495
00:19:57,208 --> 00:19:58,960
- I'm not leaving.
- Don't break it.
496
00:19:58,971 --> 00:20:00,306
- I won't.
- Where's yours?
497
00:20:00,408 --> 00:20:01,743
- In my pocket.
- Just use that.
498
00:20:01,754 --> 00:20:03,172
Yours is newer.
499
00:20:03,404 --> 00:20:04,572
Fine.
500
00:20:06,048 --> 00:20:07,717
- What's your password?
- Never.
501
00:20:13,236 --> 00:20:14,495
How about I get up and take a picture
502
00:20:14,506 --> 00:20:16,054
- of the four of you guys?
- No, no, no, no.
503
00:20:16,065 --> 00:20:17,901
You stay right where you are.
504
00:20:18,706 --> 00:20:20,016
Smile, everybody.
505
00:20:56,394 --> 00:20:58,063
Okay, okay.
506
00:20:58,074 --> 00:21:00,671
I was wrong!
507
00:21:03,006 --> 00:21:08,006
- Synced and corrected by naFraC -
- www.MY-SUBS.com -
36514
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