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♪ When your day
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♪ Seems dark as night
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♪ And nothing
4
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♪ Is going right
5
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♪ You want a love
6
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♪ That's strong and brave ♪
7
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♪ And I'll be with you
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♪ Every step of the way ♪
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♪ 'Cause oh
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♪ If you're blue ♪
11
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♪ And all alone
12
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♪ And all your so-called ♪
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♪ Your so-called ♪
14
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♪ Friends are gone
15
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♪ But I'll stick by you
16
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♪ Pretty baby
17
00:02:08,783 --> 00:02:10,523
♪ Night or day ♪
18
00:02:10,872 --> 00:02:16,225
♪ Every step of the way ♪
19
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♪ 'Cause, oh
20
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♪ Don't worry
21
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♪ Don't worry ♪
22
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♪ 'Cause I'll be there ♪ Fucking chickenshit.
23
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♪ I'll be there ♪
24
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♪ In a hurry All right, fuck it.
25
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♪ Yes ♪
26
00:02:38,987 --> 00:02:40,466
♪ Lift your head up high
27
00:02:40,553 --> 00:02:42,381
Fucking knock
on the fucking door.
28
00:02:42,468 --> 00:02:44,470
♪ And girl don't you cry ♪
29
00:02:44,775 --> 00:02:46,864
♪ 'Cause I love you ♪
30
00:02:47,125 --> 00:02:48,823
♪ I love you ♪
31
00:02:48,910 --> 00:02:50,694
Un-fucking-believable.
32
00:02:52,217 --> 00:02:55,568
♪ No, no need to cry
33
00:02:57,222 --> 00:03:00,486
♪ No need to sigh
34
00:03:01,226 --> 00:03:03,011
♪ Can't you see, girl
35
00:03:05,187 --> 00:03:08,973
♪ I offer you my life
36
00:03:15,937 --> 00:03:16,938
Hi.
37
00:03:17,808 --> 00:03:18,722
Hi.
38
00:03:20,463 --> 00:03:21,507
This is you, right?
39
00:03:21,943 --> 00:03:23,553
Yeah. That's me.
40
00:03:24,641 --> 00:03:26,512
Are you the actor Andy Samberg?
41
00:03:27,470 --> 00:03:28,427
I am.
42
00:03:28,514 --> 00:03:29,385
- You are?
Yeah.
43
00:03:29,472 --> 00:03:30,734
Are you kidding?
44
00:03:30,821 --> 00:03:33,911
I'm a big fan, man.
Like, a big fan.
45
00:03:34,042 --> 00:03:36,914
Oh, thank you very much.
Hey, I got a question for you.
46
00:03:38,263 --> 00:03:39,525
Do you like limos?
47
00:03:39,656 --> 00:03:41,614
Do I like limos? Sure. Yeah.
48
00:03:41,745 --> 00:03:42,615
Who doesn't, right?
49
00:03:42,703 --> 00:03:44,574
Right.
- Yeah.
50
00:03:44,661 --> 00:03:45,531
You wanna get in?
51
00:03:48,012 --> 00:03:49,840
Uh...
52
00:03:49,927 --> 00:03:52,060
- Sure.
- Yeah? Come on.
53
00:04:02,853 --> 00:04:05,073
Congrats. You've been selected.
54
00:04:05,160 --> 00:04:07,728
Thanks. For what?
55
00:04:09,294 --> 00:04:10,643
Um, I don't know.
56
00:04:11,340 --> 00:04:13,472
So, um, you know what?
57
00:04:13,559 --> 00:04:17,607
I'm not memorized, so I'm just
gonna read this off the card.
58
00:04:17,694 --> 00:04:19,957
Are you talking to me or...?SAMBERG: Per the contract.
59
00:04:20,044 --> 00:04:21,480
Huh? No, sorry, you're good.
60
00:04:21,567 --> 00:04:22,612
- Don't worry. Yeah.
- Okay.
61
00:04:22,873 --> 00:04:24,570
Uh, Thomas Walcott.
62
00:04:24,657 --> 00:04:27,095
Single, no children,
no dependents.
63
00:04:27,182 --> 00:04:28,836
Job is network management,
64
00:04:28,923 --> 00:04:30,881
focusing on
statistical analysis.
65
00:04:30,968 --> 00:04:32,187
Physically fit.
66
00:04:34,232 --> 00:04:35,320
Enough.
67
00:04:35,538 --> 00:04:37,366
I guess they're not too strict
about that one.
68
00:04:37,453 --> 00:04:39,585
I'm joking.
Kind of serious though.
69
00:04:39,672 --> 00:04:40,848
All right.
I'll keep it going here.
70
00:04:41,065 --> 00:04:42,850
I'm sorry. I'll keep it going.
I'ma keep it tight.
71
00:04:42,937 --> 00:04:44,416
Uh, after your breakup... I'm sorry.
72
00:04:44,503 --> 00:04:45,722
...you moved back in
with your mother.
73
00:04:45,940 --> 00:04:47,724
Yeah, I'm sorry, Andy Samberg.
How do you know all this?
74
00:04:47,855 --> 00:04:49,639
Oh, the company that hired me,
75
00:04:50,248 --> 00:04:51,902
I think they've been
tracking you for a while.
76
00:04:51,989 --> 00:04:53,730
There's a company
that's been tracking me?
77
00:04:53,817 --> 00:04:55,514
I guess what I would say is,
don't ask me
78
00:04:55,601 --> 00:04:58,474
any specific questions
because they told me nothing.
79
00:04:58,561 --> 00:05:00,650
I, I don't know any details
about what it is.
80
00:05:00,998 --> 00:05:05,263
But I do need to ask you,
do you want to continue
on this adventure?
81
00:05:07,570 --> 00:05:08,440
Um...
82
00:05:10,268 --> 00:05:11,617
Fuck it. Yes.
83
00:05:11,748 --> 00:05:13,315
- Really?
- Really, yeah. Definitely.
84
00:05:13,402 --> 00:05:14,533
Why would you say yes?
85
00:05:15,186 --> 00:05:17,754
'Cause this is the most
exciting thing that's
happened to me in ages.
86
00:05:17,841 --> 00:05:20,191
And I don't
- want it to end.
- Okay.
87
00:05:20,278 --> 00:05:23,281
I mean, if I say no,
then I have to go
back to my life.
88
00:05:23,455 --> 00:05:25,762
And my life is in this, like,
routine. It's, like, I'm stuck.
89
00:05:25,893 --> 00:05:28,504
So saying yes has to be
better than that, right?
90
00:05:28,591 --> 00:05:30,723
I mean, no, not necessarily.
91
00:05:30,811 --> 00:05:34,858
But, man, the way you just
phrased that. So sad.
92
00:05:35,163 --> 00:05:37,382
Um... All right, let's go.
93
00:05:47,958 --> 00:05:51,919
How long until we get to, uh,
the next part of the adventure?
94
00:05:55,009 --> 00:05:56,445
You're not
supposed to talk.
95
00:05:58,316 --> 00:05:59,317
How come?
96
00:06:00,318 --> 00:06:03,452
I think they just
wanna use all of this.
97
00:06:03,539 --> 00:06:04,583
Build up the tension.
98
00:06:19,207 --> 00:06:22,427
Okay. You see that red door?
Walk through it.
99
00:06:22,514 --> 00:06:24,821
There will be small red arrows
on the ground and walls.
100
00:06:24,908 --> 00:06:26,083
Just follow those.
101
00:06:26,257 --> 00:06:28,172
- You're not coming?
- No, no, I'm done.
102
00:06:28,303 --> 00:06:31,175
Yeah, they just paid me to get
you here. So...
103
00:06:32,916 --> 00:06:35,092
Well, it was really
awesome to meet you.
104
00:06:36,311 --> 00:06:37,312
Yeah.
105
00:06:38,052 --> 00:06:40,402
- Maybe we could get a beer.
- Good luck, man.
106
00:06:41,882 --> 00:06:44,145
- Yeah. Thank you.
- Yeah.
107
00:08:09,056 --> 00:08:10,100
Come sit.
108
00:08:11,275 --> 00:08:12,189
Please.
109
00:08:16,411 --> 00:08:17,281
Okay.
110
00:08:33,950 --> 00:08:35,256
Congratulations.
111
00:08:35,604 --> 00:08:37,606
You have been selected
to partake
112
00:08:37,693 --> 00:08:40,783
in the biggest reality
show in the dark web.
113
00:08:41,784 --> 00:08:44,004
There will be people
trying to kill you.
114
00:08:44,395 --> 00:08:45,266
The hunters.
115
00:08:47,181 --> 00:08:48,486
What are you talking about?
116
00:08:48,573 --> 00:08:50,358
There's people trying
to murder me?
117
00:08:50,488 --> 00:08:51,402
Very much so.
118
00:08:54,623 --> 00:08:59,193
Each participant selected
will have 30 days to... survive.
119
00:08:59,802 --> 00:09:01,891
If they survive 30 days,
120
00:09:01,978 --> 00:09:06,113
they will receive
one million dollars, cash.
121
00:09:06,200 --> 00:09:09,377
The hunters will be all
around the world, Mr. Walcott,
122
00:09:09,464 --> 00:09:12,510
and, uh, might not
make it to your city.
123
00:09:12,684 --> 00:09:14,991
So you will be safe
until they find you.
124
00:09:15,078 --> 00:09:17,428
You might spend the next 30 days
and never encounter anyone,
125
00:09:17,515 --> 00:09:19,604
but you still make
the million dollars.
126
00:09:20,605 --> 00:09:22,607
We will be filming
you the entire time.
127
00:09:22,694 --> 00:09:23,652
How?
128
00:09:24,174 --> 00:09:26,176
Production assistants have
already bugged your residence
129
00:09:26,263 --> 00:09:28,874
as well as places
we expect you to go.
130
00:09:28,961 --> 00:09:33,401
They will travel as you do.
You will not see them.
131
00:09:33,488 --> 00:09:35,316
They are highly skilled
at evasion.
132
00:09:36,534 --> 00:09:39,668
So they're kind of like
production assistant ninjas?
133
00:09:39,755 --> 00:09:42,105
No, they are not trained ninjas.
134
00:09:42,192 --> 00:09:44,760
I didn't say trained ninjas,
I said like ninjas.
135
00:09:44,847 --> 00:09:50,548
But if it helps you to say yes,
to think of them as ninjas,
136
00:09:51,114 --> 00:09:52,507
we are fine with that.
137
00:09:52,855 --> 00:09:55,553
Excuse me. I need to
stand up for a moment.
138
00:09:55,684 --> 00:09:57,642
- Yeah, please.
Thank you.
139
00:10:04,736 --> 00:10:05,868
What are you thinking?
140
00:10:05,998 --> 00:10:08,871
I mean, what can I do
to help you say yes?
141
00:10:08,958 --> 00:10:11,134
Ah, nothing.
I don't think I can do this.
142
00:10:11,221 --> 00:10:12,918
Oh, you can. You should.
143
00:10:14,833 --> 00:10:18,141
Well, come sit down, yeah.
You can always say no.
144
00:10:18,228 --> 00:10:20,448
So, just come sit
for a minute. Yeah?
145
00:10:22,885 --> 00:10:24,539
It's very interesting, guys.
146
00:10:24,800 --> 00:10:28,064
I just, I don't think that I can
do this. I can't risk
other people's lives.
147
00:10:28,151 --> 00:10:30,762
I can't, I can't have my
roommate catching a bullet
148
00:10:30,849 --> 00:10:32,677
'cause I'm playing
some silly game.
149
00:10:33,504 --> 00:10:35,289
Your mother will be safe.
150
00:10:36,159 --> 00:10:38,248
How do you--
How can you guarantee that?
151
00:10:38,422 --> 00:10:40,859
You will only be killed
when you are alone.
152
00:10:42,078 --> 00:10:44,124
What does that mean, I'll only
be killed when I'm alone?
153
00:10:44,298 --> 00:10:48,128
If you are with someone else,
the hunters will have to wait.
154
00:10:48,737 --> 00:10:51,566
There is no risk to anyone else.
155
00:10:51,740 --> 00:10:55,874
But once alone,
you are no longer safe.
156
00:10:57,093 --> 00:10:58,007
So that's a loophole.
157
00:10:58,399 --> 00:11:01,141
Well, this is no loophole.
It's just a rule.
158
00:11:01,228 --> 00:11:02,446
Well, it's kind of a loophole.
159
00:11:03,186 --> 00:11:06,233
What if I was with, like,
my mom or my sisters
every second of every day?
160
00:11:06,320 --> 00:11:08,496
You would need to spend
every moment
161
00:11:08,583 --> 00:11:12,369
with them in close proximity.
It's not as easy as it sounds.
162
00:11:13,718 --> 00:11:15,503
Yeah. If the person
you're with walks
163
00:11:15,590 --> 00:11:19,115
to the other side of the room,
you are vulnerable for attack.
164
00:11:19,768 --> 00:11:22,814
You must be within
striking distance from them
165
00:11:23,380 --> 00:11:25,252
each and every second.
166
00:11:25,426 --> 00:11:29,734
So let me get this straight.
It's 30 days, right?
167
00:11:29,821 --> 00:11:31,388
And you guys are hunting me
for my life.
168
00:11:31,475 --> 00:11:34,826
But you cannot touch me
if I'm with someone,
169
00:11:35,305 --> 00:11:38,178
and the hunters might not
even ever make it to my city.
170
00:11:38,395 --> 00:11:41,268
So there's a chance I spend
the entire 30 days
171
00:11:41,355 --> 00:11:42,921
and no one even finds me.
172
00:11:43,008 --> 00:11:45,968
And then I get
a million dollars.
That's the game?
173
00:11:47,012 --> 00:11:49,798
- Yes.
- Are you interested?
174
00:11:57,849 --> 00:11:58,937
Let's play.
175
00:12:04,029 --> 00:12:07,468
I just wanna make sure
that I'm clear
on what you're saying.
176
00:12:07,555 --> 00:12:10,384
What you called us all here on
a Saturday to say, which is
177
00:12:10,471 --> 00:12:12,951
that Andy Samberg pulled up
to you driving a limo?
178
00:12:13,038 --> 00:12:15,563
- No, I, I'm not saying that.
Okay. What are you saying?
179
00:12:15,650 --> 00:12:16,520
He had a chauffeur.
180
00:12:17,304 --> 00:12:20,132
I'd hope so.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I botched that detail.
181
00:12:20,220 --> 00:12:21,743
Oh, you're damn right
he'd have a driver.
182
00:12:21,830 --> 00:12:23,571
The Sams ain't driving himself.
183
00:12:23,701 --> 00:12:25,355
Don't call him The Sams.
He goes by Andy.
184
00:12:25,442 --> 00:12:27,836
- What are you, his publicist?
- Yeah, you're his
best friend now?
185
00:12:27,923 --> 00:12:29,751
No, but he, no,
I didn't call him The Sams.
186
00:12:29,838 --> 00:12:31,231
- He didn't introduce himself.
- I call him The Sams.
187
00:12:31,318 --> 00:12:33,450
You've never met him.
188
00:12:33,581 --> 00:12:35,191
Andy Samberg.
- Yeah.
189
00:12:35,278 --> 00:12:37,976
Is like, "Hey Tommy,
get in, get in the backseat."
190
00:12:39,326 --> 00:12:41,110
I'm just trying to get it right.
191
00:12:41,197 --> 00:12:42,459
I didn't, okay,
this is getting turned around.
192
00:12:42,546 --> 00:12:44,287
I'm done talking about
Andy fucking Samberg.
193
00:12:44,374 --> 00:12:45,549
If the hunters find me,
194
00:12:45,636 --> 00:12:47,725
you need to be with me
24/7 so I don't die.
195
00:12:47,812 --> 00:12:50,424
Oh, hey, but, like, aren't there
other people playing
196
00:12:50,511 --> 00:12:52,513
the pretend-y game who
could hang out with you?
197
00:12:52,817 --> 00:12:55,516
I posted a cryptic
message on, uh, Craigslist.
198
00:12:55,603 --> 00:12:57,431
I'm waiting to hear back,
but I can't depend on it.
199
00:12:57,518 --> 00:12:59,084
So in the meantime, I need
to lean on the family.
200
00:12:59,171 --> 00:13:02,740
Okay. Tommy, you are delusional.
201
00:13:02,827 --> 00:13:04,264
I am not delusional.
202
00:13:04,351 --> 00:13:07,092
What about when you told
everybody at school
203
00:13:07,179 --> 00:13:09,181
that you were moving to Japan
204
00:13:09,356 --> 00:13:12,750
to become a Samurai with Dad
after he left? How about that?
205
00:13:12,837 --> 00:13:14,926
Great idea. Bringing up
when Dad left,
right in front of Mom.
206
00:13:15,100 --> 00:13:17,451
Okay, what about
the time that you made us all
207
00:13:17,538 --> 00:13:20,236
call you Michael Jackson
for a year?
208
00:13:20,410 --> 00:13:22,020
Okay, you know what, guys?'Cause I liked his music.
209
00:13:22,107 --> 00:13:23,587
No, you know what, guys?
- Stop. Stop.
- I was a fan.
210
00:13:23,674 --> 00:13:24,762
There's a big difference
between liking--
211
00:13:24,849 --> 00:13:25,720
What is the difference?
212
00:13:26,373 --> 00:13:28,592
Stop, stop. Just a minute, okay?
Just hang on just a minute.
213
00:13:28,679 --> 00:13:31,421
Honey, do you think that
all this, Andy Samberg,
214
00:13:31,508 --> 00:13:35,556
Greenlandic ninjas,
the Internet killing show
215
00:13:35,643 --> 00:13:39,560
is really, really more
about the fact
216
00:13:39,647 --> 00:13:43,215
that Theresa broke up with you
and now she has a baby?
217
00:13:43,303 --> 00:13:47,568
So you created this all
as a diversion
218
00:13:47,655 --> 00:13:49,744
so that you wouldn't have
to feel the emotional pain
219
00:13:49,831 --> 00:13:52,964
of that loss.
I mean, is that a possibility?
220
00:13:53,878 --> 00:13:54,836
Well, first of all,
221
00:13:55,271 --> 00:13:56,620
thanks for bringing up
my breakup in this moment.
222
00:13:56,707 --> 00:13:59,493
It feels like a great time
for a mother to do that.
223
00:13:59,884 --> 00:14:02,191
Um, and second, um,
224
00:14:02,278 --> 00:14:04,933
if you're implying, lemme just
try to do the math on this,
225
00:14:05,020 --> 00:14:08,676
that the producers of this game
226
00:14:08,763 --> 00:14:10,330
implanted my ex-girlfriend,
227
00:14:10,417 --> 00:14:13,594
who I haven't talked
to in nearly two years,
228
00:14:13,681 --> 00:14:15,987
uh, with a baby.
229
00:14:16,074 --> 00:14:18,816
She grew the baby
and had it in order to get me
230
00:14:18,903 --> 00:14:21,906
to risk my life
for a million dollars?
231
00:14:21,993 --> 00:14:23,517
Right, but if all that happened,
then possibly.
232
00:14:23,604 --> 00:14:26,215
But to me that seems
a little wacky.
Are you okay?
233
00:14:26,346 --> 00:14:27,434
- I'm done.
- Are you okay?
234
00:14:27,825 --> 00:14:29,218
I'm done with this, Tommy.'Cause I'm worried about you.
235
00:14:29,305 --> 00:14:30,219
- Tommy.
- What?
236
00:14:30,524 --> 00:14:31,916
You're lonely,
so find a club, you know.
237
00:14:32,003 --> 00:14:32,961
Yeah. That's not
what this is about.
238
00:14:33,265 --> 00:14:34,484
- Do a hobby or something.
- Yeah, I understand.
239
00:14:34,571 --> 00:14:36,181
- Just, this is sad.
- Yeah, thanks.
240
00:14:36,356 --> 00:14:38,749
And this is all in your head.
Get over it.
241
00:14:38,836 --> 00:14:40,272
Don't leave that ice cream,
cause I'll eat it all.
242
00:14:40,360 --> 00:14:42,362
- Great.
Bye, Mom.
I'll see you Thursday.
243
00:14:42,449 --> 00:14:43,711
Is, is it Thursday?
I thought it was Friday.
244
00:14:43,798 --> 00:14:44,886
- No, it's Thursday.
Bye, Tommy!
245
00:14:45,016 --> 00:14:46,148
I hope
the ninjas don't kill you.
246
00:14:46,235 --> 00:14:48,150
Mom. You believe me, right?
247
00:14:49,020 --> 00:14:50,065
Not even a little.
248
00:16:29,207 --> 00:16:30,078
Hello?
249
00:16:41,263 --> 00:16:42,133
Hello?
250
00:17:34,142 --> 00:17:35,578
Tommy, what?
251
00:17:36,100 --> 00:17:37,101
Someone found me.
252
00:17:37,449 --> 00:17:39,234
Oh, good.
Well, now that they found you,
253
00:17:39,364 --> 00:17:40,627
maybe you can move in
with them.
254
00:17:40,714 --> 00:17:42,324
It was
a production assistant.
255
00:17:42,411 --> 00:17:43,934
It was one of
the ninjas with a camera.
256
00:17:44,021 --> 00:17:45,632
Oh, God. This crap, again?
257
00:17:45,719 --> 00:17:49,723
Mom, I'm holding a tiny camera
in my hands right now.
258
00:17:49,853 --> 00:17:52,595
A tiny- What are you holding
a tiny camera for?
259
00:17:52,682 --> 00:17:54,510
It's either that or a piece
of rat shit. I'm not sure.
260
00:17:54,597 --> 00:17:56,904
But- Or, like, a, a weird
little blueberry.
261
00:17:56,991 --> 00:17:58,862
Either way, do you understand
what I'm saying, Mom?
262
00:17:58,949 --> 00:17:59,820
Yeah, I know what you're saying.
263
00:17:59,994 --> 00:18:01,822
You're holding a
tiny piece of rat shit
264
00:18:01,909 --> 00:18:03,650
and you're... Hi.
265
00:18:03,737 --> 00:18:06,827
And you're
pretending that it's a camera.
266
00:18:06,914 --> 00:18:09,177
Put it down. Wash your hands.
It's full of diseases.
267
00:18:09,264 --> 00:18:10,526
Okay, you're not
listening to what I'm saying.
268
00:18:10,613 --> 00:18:11,614
I need to come
see you right now.
269
00:18:12,006 --> 00:18:13,311
I need to come to the hospital.
I can't be alone.
270
00:18:13,398 --> 00:18:16,227
- Oh, no, no, no.
- Mom, do you want me killed?
271
00:18:16,314 --> 00:18:17,577
You know what, at this point,
272
00:18:17,664 --> 00:18:20,014
I think that,
that I would prefer Sandy Amberg
273
00:18:20,101 --> 00:18:21,711
to murder you on a computer show
274
00:18:21,798 --> 00:18:24,366
than have you come down here
and get me fired.
275
00:18:24,453 --> 00:18:26,760
His name is Andy Samberg.
276
00:18:26,847 --> 00:18:29,850
I don't care what his name...
Call your sister.
277
00:18:31,068 --> 00:18:31,982
Oh, God.
278
00:18:32,287 --> 00:18:34,332
Dude,
I heard something, like, bang.
279
00:18:34,419 --> 00:18:37,640
It spooked me, man. Like,
I know they're on to me now.
280
00:18:37,727 --> 00:18:39,207
I left the back door closed.
281
00:18:39,337 --> 00:18:42,166
I mean, I get it. Your mom's
at work. It's after midnight.
282
00:18:42,558 --> 00:18:43,994
You can't just run over there.
283
00:18:44,342 --> 00:18:46,431
Well, this-- Yeah,
either way, man.
284
00:18:46,518 --> 00:18:48,129
I appreciate it. I didn't
know what I was gonna do.
285
00:18:48,216 --> 00:18:49,217
I can't be alone.
286
00:18:49,609 --> 00:18:51,480
Yeah, no, your sister
doesn't get home until two.
287
00:18:51,567 --> 00:18:53,787
So you're more than welcome
to crash here with us
on the couch.
288
00:18:53,874 --> 00:18:54,744
You'll be good.
289
00:18:55,876 --> 00:18:57,921
Yeah, and then what time
do you wanna hop in there
and go to bed together?
290
00:18:58,748 --> 00:18:59,619
Huh?
291
00:19:00,445 --> 00:19:02,534
At what point you wanna--
If we hang out here,
we'll watch--
292
00:19:02,622 --> 00:19:05,363
I'm beat now. I'm ready for bed.
I'll keep watching
the movie with you,
293
00:19:05,450 --> 00:19:08,540
but I don't, I don't care.
I mean, I'm zonked, bro.
294
00:19:08,932 --> 00:19:10,978
You wanna sleep
in the bed with me?
295
00:19:11,761 --> 00:19:12,936
No.
296
00:19:17,332 --> 00:19:18,725
Good, man.
'Cause for a second there,
297
00:19:18,812 --> 00:19:20,335
I was a little confused
of what you were asking.
298
00:19:20,422 --> 00:19:22,250
I have to for my safety.
299
00:19:25,035 --> 00:19:26,428
What?
300
00:19:26,776 --> 00:19:28,996
I have to sleep in bed
with you so that I don't die.
301
00:19:29,083 --> 00:19:30,388
These are the rules, my man.
302
00:19:31,172 --> 00:19:34,262
Look, bro, I don't want
you to die. I want you to
be safe. You're my brother.
303
00:19:34,349 --> 00:19:35,698
- I love you.
- I love you.
304
00:19:35,785 --> 00:19:38,353
But we not sleeping
in the same bed.
305
00:19:41,399 --> 00:19:42,966
- Yes, we are.
- No, we're not.
306
00:19:43,053 --> 00:19:43,924
Yes, we are.
307
00:19:44,011 --> 00:19:44,925
- No, we are not.
- Yes, we are.
308
00:19:45,012 --> 00:19:46,274
- We are not.
- Yes, we are.
309
00:19:46,361 --> 00:19:47,754
- No.
- Yes.
310
00:19:50,582 --> 00:19:52,367
- Well, goodnight, man.
- Shut the fuck up.
311
00:20:19,176 --> 00:20:20,961
Oh, shit. No, no, no, no.
312
00:20:21,048 --> 00:20:23,877
Oh, no. Malcolm! Malcolm!
313
00:20:23,964 --> 00:20:26,618
I'm in the bathroom.
- Ah, ah. Oh, God.
314
00:20:26,706 --> 00:20:28,882
What's going on?
315
00:20:28,969 --> 00:20:32,102
I am in the bathroom
taking a shit. What's happening?
316
00:20:33,669 --> 00:20:35,671
- What are you doing?
- What are you doing, man?
317
00:20:35,758 --> 00:20:37,847
- Why'd you leave my side?
- I had to take a shit.
318
00:20:37,934 --> 00:20:39,849
Why didn't you wake me
up and bring me with you?
319
00:20:39,936 --> 00:20:41,721
Because I'm taking a shit.
320
00:20:41,808 --> 00:20:43,810
I can't be alone.
321
00:20:43,940 --> 00:20:46,508
I'm not gonna wake
you up to bring you in here
to take a shit with me.
322
00:20:46,595 --> 00:20:48,249
He's right here. He's taking
a dump. He's taking a dump.
323
00:20:48,336 --> 00:20:50,555
Put the rifle down.
No, no, no.
Get up, get up, get up.
324
00:20:50,642 --> 00:20:51,818
Do not pull me off-Turn around.
325
00:20:51,905 --> 00:20:53,907
- Turn the fuck around.
- What are you doing?
326
00:20:53,994 --> 00:20:56,953
He's right here.
What the? God.
327
00:20:57,040 --> 00:20:59,129
Man, there's nobody out there.
328
00:20:59,913 --> 00:21:02,089
Well...
329
00:21:05,919 --> 00:21:06,789
They found me.
330
00:21:06,920 --> 00:21:08,922
They found you, alright.
331
00:21:12,534 --> 00:21:14,623
- Get out.
- Huh?
332
00:21:15,885 --> 00:21:17,669
Get out!
333
00:21:17,757 --> 00:21:20,194
What you are doing
is irresponsible.
334
00:21:20,281 --> 00:21:21,673
You are not
thinking clearly, man.
335
00:21:21,761 --> 00:21:22,631
Oh, yes, I am.
336
00:21:22,979 --> 00:21:24,198
No, you're not.
- And when Amy comes home,
337
00:21:24,546 --> 00:21:25,852
I'll explain to her that you
kicked in our bathroom door...
338
00:21:25,939 --> 00:21:28,376
I was being hunted....and pulled me off the toilet.
339
00:21:28,463 --> 00:21:30,204
I can't be alone.
I've told you that.
340
00:21:30,291 --> 00:21:31,640
- I can't be alone.
- I had to go to the bathroom.
341
00:21:31,727 --> 00:21:32,772
- I'm sorry.
- What was I supposed to do?
342
00:21:33,163 --> 00:21:34,599
Wake you up so I can have
another man watch me dump?
343
00:21:34,686 --> 00:21:35,600
No, that's gross.
344
00:21:35,818 --> 00:21:37,298
I know it's gross.
I didn't wanna do it.
345
00:21:37,385 --> 00:21:40,170
I don't have a choice.
I can't be alone, man.
346
00:21:40,257 --> 00:21:41,302
Fuck.
347
00:21:48,744 --> 00:21:49,919
Hey, you see that guy?
348
00:21:51,138 --> 00:21:52,008
Who, him?
349
00:21:52,661 --> 00:21:53,880
Yeah, him. Do you see him?
Yeah, I see him.
350
00:21:53,880 --> 00:21:55,229
Just watch me
until I get to him.
351
00:21:55,316 --> 00:21:57,709
Please do not leave until
I'm with that man, okay?
352
00:21:57,797 --> 00:21:58,710
You sure?
353
00:21:59,059 --> 00:22:00,495
Yes, I'm sure. You promise
you'll keep watching?
354
00:22:00,582 --> 00:22:02,540
I promise I'll watch you.
355
00:22:03,541 --> 00:22:06,631
I'm sorry I pulled you
off a toilet while you were
taking a dump.
356
00:22:06,718 --> 00:22:08,590
It's all right.
I'll forgive you.
357
00:22:09,417 --> 00:22:10,505
We family.
358
00:22:19,601 --> 00:22:20,689
Excuse me, sir.
359
00:22:21,559 --> 00:22:24,432
Hi. Uh, are, are you interested
in making some money?
360
00:22:24,519 --> 00:22:25,694
Yeah.
361
00:22:25,781 --> 00:22:27,565
Yeah?
- Yeah, how much?
362
00:22:27,652 --> 00:22:30,917
This is so weird. Very weird.
363
00:22:31,004 --> 00:22:32,788
You have no idea, man.
You're saving my life.
364
00:22:32,875 --> 00:22:35,051
- Now well, how could that be?
- Because I can't be alone,
365
00:22:35,138 --> 00:22:36,705
'cause I'm playing
this dark web game.
366
00:22:36,792 --> 00:22:38,576
And so the whole thing
about it is if I'm alone
367
00:22:38,663 --> 00:22:39,839
even for a second,
I can be killed.
368
00:22:39,926 --> 00:22:41,144
But if I'm with you, I'm safe.
369
00:22:41,231 --> 00:22:43,233
So you'll just shadow
me and then I'm safe.
370
00:22:48,064 --> 00:22:49,805
What the fuck is this?
371
00:22:49,892 --> 00:22:51,720
I'm gonna need you to be
a little bit more specific.
372
00:22:51,807 --> 00:22:53,156
You need me to be more specific?
373
00:22:53,243 --> 00:22:55,376
How about the stranger who's
eating Mom's Raisin Bran.
374
00:22:55,463 --> 00:22:56,638
Is that specific enough
for you, Tommy?
375
00:22:56,725 --> 00:22:57,900
Amy, you don't have
to- don't be rude, honey.
376
00:22:57,987 --> 00:22:58,858
- Mom.
- Don't.
377
00:22:59,684 --> 00:23:03,253
You called me to come over here,
so please don't be soft now, okay?
378
00:23:03,732 --> 00:23:07,954
Malcolm told me that you pulled
him off the toilet last night
379
00:23:08,041 --> 00:23:10,652
when he was in the middle
of using the bathroom.
380
00:23:10,739 --> 00:23:12,828
Well, I asked him to stand.
He wouldn't stand.
381
00:23:12,915 --> 00:23:16,223
I'm sorry I revealed
his bare bottom.
That was not my intention.
382
00:23:16,876 --> 00:23:18,399
And this is James,
my new friend.
383
00:23:18,529 --> 00:23:19,704
Hi, James.
384
00:23:19,835 --> 00:23:20,792
Hi, Tommy's family.
385
00:23:20,923 --> 00:23:22,577
Oh, we are very happy
to have you.
386
00:23:22,707 --> 00:23:26,798
Mm. I'm very happy to be here.
I slept great last night.
387
00:23:26,886 --> 00:23:27,756
Me too, man.
388
00:23:27,843 --> 00:23:29,366
Good.
389
00:23:29,497 --> 00:23:30,933
James, would you mind just
stepping outside, please,
390
00:23:31,020 --> 00:23:32,935
for a minute, so I can
talk to my son now.
391
00:23:33,066 --> 00:23:35,590
Oh, I can't do that.
He pays me to shadow him.
392
00:23:35,677 --> 00:23:37,026
It's my job.
393
00:23:37,331 --> 00:23:38,941
Oh, wow. That is amazing.
394
00:23:39,072 --> 00:23:40,203
- Shadow?
- Good work.
395
00:23:40,421 --> 00:23:42,640
Thank you for taking my
unique situation seriously.
396
00:23:42,727 --> 00:23:44,599
It genuinely means
the world to me.
397
00:23:44,686 --> 00:23:46,122
'Cause I'm kind of
in a tough spot
398
00:23:46,209 --> 00:23:47,863
and you're the only one
who's kind of helping.
399
00:23:47,950 --> 00:23:49,865
So thank you.
But you can step outside.
400
00:23:49,952 --> 00:23:51,040
- Are you sure?
- Yeah.
401
00:23:51,127 --> 00:23:51,998
Okay.
402
00:23:52,085 --> 00:23:53,564
- Don't go far.
- I won't.
403
00:23:57,177 --> 00:23:58,918
What in the actual fuck
is going on with you?
404
00:23:59,005 --> 00:24:00,789
There was a cowboy
who had a rifle...
405
00:24:00,876 --> 00:24:02,704
- A cowboy? A cowboy.
...on me last night.
406
00:24:02,791 --> 00:24:04,836
And he was going
to shoot me and kill me.
407
00:24:04,967 --> 00:24:07,230
I cannot be alone, you guys.
408
00:24:08,362 --> 00:24:09,841
I thought you were
gonna be more supportive
409
00:24:09,929 --> 00:24:12,235
or I never would've signed up
for this fucking game.
410
00:24:12,322 --> 00:24:14,672
Oh, that's not fair.
- Supportive.
- I support this.
411
00:24:14,803 --> 00:24:17,240
So, yes, I hired a person
without a home to shadow me.
412
00:24:17,327 --> 00:24:18,850
Why?'Cause you're a weirdo.
413
00:24:18,981 --> 00:24:20,504
Because I don't wanna die.
414
00:24:20,635 --> 00:24:23,203
You cannot have this person
sleeping in Mom's house.
415
00:24:23,290 --> 00:24:24,944
We don't know him.
It's not safe.
416
00:24:25,031 --> 00:24:27,207
Then how about this.
Are you gonna shadow me?
417
00:24:27,294 --> 00:24:28,948
- No.
Are you gonna shadow me?
418
00:24:29,035 --> 00:24:31,298
- No, I'm not gonna shadow.
Are you gonna shadow me?
419
00:24:31,385 --> 00:24:33,691
I don't wanna take away
James's job.
420
00:24:34,344 --> 00:24:35,824
So what choice do I have here?
421
00:24:36,085 --> 00:24:39,567
Okay, well, Mom...
Mom, kick him out.
422
00:24:40,481 --> 00:24:42,048
He's an adult. He has money.
He's got a job.
423
00:24:42,135 --> 00:24:43,049
- Mom, we had a deal.
- Kick him out.
424
00:24:43,658 --> 00:24:44,920
You said, as long as I had
a job, I could stay with you.
425
00:24:44,920 --> 00:24:45,790
I have a job.
426
00:24:45,877 --> 00:24:46,748
- Mom.
- Mom.
427
00:24:46,835 --> 00:24:48,184
- No. Mom.
- Mom.
428
00:24:48,315 --> 00:24:49,881
Yeah, I did.
No, I did say that.
429
00:24:49,969 --> 00:24:53,363
I remember saying that.
But that, now, now this,
this whole thing
430
00:24:53,450 --> 00:24:56,584
about picking people up
off of the toilet bowls.
431
00:24:56,671 --> 00:24:58,542
Honey, that's, I mean, come on.
432
00:24:58,629 --> 00:25:03,199
That, I mean, no more of that.
Okay? All right,
that's fair I think.
433
00:25:03,460 --> 00:25:04,331
As long as I got him,
434
00:25:04,940 --> 00:25:06,333
I don't have to pull anybody
off a toilet bowl, right?
435
00:25:06,333 --> 00:25:07,812
That's why I have him.
436
00:25:08,335 --> 00:25:09,814
But that's over. That's a deal.
437
00:25:10,598 --> 00:25:12,339
Yeah, very tough, Mom.
Well done.
438
00:25:17,561 --> 00:25:18,562
Whoa.
439
00:25:18,780 --> 00:25:20,956
This is gonna end badly.
I guarantee it.
440
00:26:13,400 --> 00:26:14,749
Where's your best friend?
441
00:26:14,836 --> 00:26:15,924
I don't know.
442
00:26:16,185 --> 00:26:17,926
I tried calling him,
hopefully he's on his way.
443
00:26:18,405 --> 00:26:19,928
Long and short of it
is I gotta crash with you
444
00:26:20,015 --> 00:26:21,234
- a couple of days.
- Well, you can't.
445
00:26:21,321 --> 00:26:22,191
Yes, I can.
446
00:26:22,365 --> 00:26:23,845
- No, you can't.
- I actually have to.
447
00:26:23,932 --> 00:26:25,890
- Mom kicked me out.
- Wow, 'cause you got fired?
448
00:26:25,977 --> 00:26:27,414
Yes, I had to deal with...
449
00:26:28,371 --> 00:26:29,633
Holy shit.
450
00:26:29,720 --> 00:26:31,505
Oh my God.
Is that the Craigslist post?
451
00:26:31,592 --> 00:26:33,376
It's also happening
to me. Shall we chat?
452
00:26:33,463 --> 00:26:35,248
- This is exactly what I want.
- Honestly, get your hands off.
453
00:26:35,335 --> 00:26:36,292
Can you just forward it to me?
454
00:26:36,684 --> 00:26:37,728
- Stay here. Don't go away.
- Just forward it to me.
455
00:26:37,815 --> 00:26:39,904
Sorry, it's really loud.
Gimme one sec.
456
00:26:39,991 --> 00:26:42,168
This is the guy from Craigslist.
457
00:26:42,255 --> 00:26:43,125
Oh, hi. Yeah.
458
00:26:43,256 --> 00:26:45,780
I saw your ad.
I'm a participant.
459
00:26:45,867 --> 00:26:46,998
How do I know you're real?
460
00:26:47,086 --> 00:26:48,348
How do I know you're real?
461
00:26:48,522 --> 00:26:50,567
Yeah, but this could be a setup.
You could be hunting me.
462
00:26:50,654 --> 00:26:52,787
You could be hunting me.
Okay, so let's meet.
463
00:26:52,874 --> 00:26:55,094
You wanna meet in public
somewhere so it's safe?
464
00:26:55,181 --> 00:26:56,834
How's that? MADDY: Okay, sure. When?
465
00:26:56,921 --> 00:26:58,271
Uh, now.
466
00:26:58,706 --> 00:27:00,664
No, it's the middle
of the night.
I could do tomorrow.
467
00:27:01,665 --> 00:27:03,798
Okay, you know
where La Cita is downtown?
468
00:27:03,885 --> 00:27:05,060
No, but I can figure it out.
469
00:27:05,191 --> 00:27:07,410
Great, let's meet there
tomorrow at 10:00 AM.
470
00:27:07,497 --> 00:27:08,498
Can you do that?
471
00:27:08,672 --> 00:27:10,413
Okay.
How are you gonna recognize me?
472
00:27:11,371 --> 00:27:13,503
You got anything yellow?
Like, a yellow hat?
473
00:27:13,590 --> 00:27:14,852
I've got a banana sweatshirt.
474
00:27:14,939 --> 00:27:16,245
What's a banana sweatshirt?
475
00:27:16,463 --> 00:27:18,117
It's a sweatshirt
with a giant banana on it.
476
00:27:18,204 --> 00:27:20,293
Okay.
Wear the banana sweatshirt.
477
00:27:20,510 --> 00:27:21,859
Okay, are you gonna
be wearing yellow?
478
00:27:22,469 --> 00:27:25,080
No, it would be ridiculous
if we were both wearing
yellow clothes, right?
479
00:27:25,167 --> 00:27:27,430
That's a good point.
I'll see you tomorrow.
480
00:27:27,517 --> 00:27:28,649
Yeah, great. This is good.
481
00:27:30,129 --> 00:27:31,478
Oh shit!
482
00:27:48,843 --> 00:27:49,713
Stop.
483
00:27:51,715 --> 00:27:53,500
Oh, God. Oh.
484
00:27:53,717 --> 00:27:55,806
- I'm not, I'm not alone.
- You're alone.
485
00:27:55,893 --> 00:27:58,418
I'm not! James is coming.
He's on his way right now.
486
00:27:58,679 --> 00:28:00,898
Oh, God. Oh, God.
487
00:28:16,523 --> 00:28:19,134
Help! Fucking help! Help! Help!
488
00:28:19,221 --> 00:28:21,136
SOS! Hey, did you
not hear me, man?
489
00:28:21,223 --> 00:28:23,312
- No, what happened?
- What the fuck
you doing standing here?
490
00:28:23,399 --> 00:28:24,400
I'm here.
491
00:28:24,835 --> 00:28:27,055
I was just choked by a giant.
He was trying to kill me.
492
00:28:27,142 --> 00:28:29,188
He, he was wearing a, a red
leather jacket with the...
493
00:28:29,275 --> 00:28:31,755
He was wearing a fucking
Michael Jackson jacket.
494
00:28:31,842 --> 00:28:33,801
He was wearing the fucking
"Thriller" jacket.
495
00:28:33,888 --> 00:28:36,020
You got choked by a giant
dressed like Michael Jackson.
496
00:28:36,107 --> 00:28:37,021
He had the zippers.
497
00:28:37,500 --> 00:28:39,546
He had the Michael Jackson
"Thriller" video zippers.
498
00:28:39,633 --> 00:28:42,766
Sorry, that's the jacket from...
That's not
the "Thriller" jacket.
499
00:28:43,158 --> 00:28:44,768
- What?
- The "Thriller" jacket?
500
00:28:44,855 --> 00:28:47,031
The one, the-
Was it a zippers jacket, right?
501
00:28:47,162 --> 00:28:48,816
Yeah. That from "Beat It."
502
00:28:48,946 --> 00:28:51,166
The "Thriller" jacket,
they're similar jackets.
503
00:28:51,253 --> 00:28:52,385
Tommy!
- I'm sorry.
504
00:28:52,559 --> 00:28:55,518
Tommy. I'm here. I'm sorry, man.
505
00:28:55,953 --> 00:28:57,651
- Oh, man.
I'm sorry, man.
506
00:28:57,738 --> 00:29:01,263
- Where the fuck were you, man?
- I was waiting for your call.
507
00:29:01,350 --> 00:29:03,961
I fucking called you ten times.
508
00:29:04,048 --> 00:29:06,834
My phone never rang.
Maybe it's dead.
509
00:29:08,618 --> 00:29:10,229
Okay, let's just go, man.
510
00:29:11,839 --> 00:29:14,450
Tell my sister I was
almost murdered. Okay?
511
00:29:14,537 --> 00:29:15,886
I'm gonna give her
a full report.
512
00:29:16,452 --> 00:29:17,540
Thanks but hang on.
513
00:29:17,801 --> 00:29:19,325
We gotta get that thing
a charger, and we're...
514
00:29:20,630 --> 00:29:22,632
It's pretty fucking annoying,
but also really cool
515
00:29:22,719 --> 00:29:24,417
how much you know about
Michael Jackson, man.
516
00:29:24,504 --> 00:29:26,245
I loved his music
when I was a kid.
517
00:29:30,597 --> 00:29:32,251
Thanks. Me too.
518
00:29:35,079 --> 00:29:36,951
All right. Is your phone
100 percent charged?
519
00:29:37,038 --> 00:29:39,083
Yes, sir. It is.
- Okay, let's do this.
520
00:29:47,440 --> 00:29:50,007
I think that's her.
She doesn't look
that scary to me.
521
00:29:50,094 --> 00:29:52,358
Well, you never know.
Stay with me, okay?
522
00:29:52,445 --> 00:29:54,925
Okay, I got your back.
Don't worry about it.
523
00:29:56,536 --> 00:29:59,278
Hi, are you, uh, are you
the lady from, uh, Craigslist?
524
00:29:59,365 --> 00:30:00,931
- Yeah.
You are?
525
00:30:01,802 --> 00:30:03,456
Why aren't you wearing
the, uh, banana sweatshirt
526
00:30:03,586 --> 00:30:05,066
- like you said?
- Oh, I got self-conscious.
527
00:30:05,196 --> 00:30:06,546
About what?
528
00:30:06,633 --> 00:30:08,243
It's a sweatshirt
with a giant banana on it.
529
00:30:08,896 --> 00:30:10,898
But this is yellow,
so I wore this.
530
00:30:10,985 --> 00:30:12,116
Do you guys wanna sit?
531
00:30:12,203 --> 00:30:13,030
- Yeah. Let's sit down.
- Yeah, please.
532
00:30:13,117 --> 00:30:14,031
- Great.
- Uh...
533
00:30:14,641 --> 00:30:15,990
Would you mind sitting there,
- James?
- I don't mind.
534
00:30:15,990 --> 00:30:17,600
Oh, thanks for meeting.
- Yeah, sure.
535
00:30:17,774 --> 00:30:19,907
It's nice to meet you. I'm Tom.
536
00:30:19,994 --> 00:30:20,864
- Maddy.
Maddy?
537
00:30:20,951 --> 00:30:21,865
- Yeah.
Yeah.
538
00:30:22,039 --> 00:30:23,911
- How many days you got left?
- Fifteen.
539
00:30:24,041 --> 00:30:26,000
- You?
- Sixteen.
540
00:30:29,308 --> 00:30:30,918
I got a question for ya.
541
00:30:31,310 --> 00:30:34,530
If you're playing the game,
then how the fuck
are you alone right now?
542
00:30:35,662 --> 00:30:36,532
I'm not alone.
543
00:30:37,533 --> 00:30:39,753
Well, we don't count.
We just got here. You were
alone before we got here.
544
00:30:39,753 --> 00:30:42,669
- Yeah, my Mom's right over there.
- Okay, well, that's my Dad
right there.
545
00:30:43,060 --> 00:30:44,410
- Mom?
- Yeah, oh, yeah?
546
00:30:44,845 --> 00:30:45,846
- Hi.
- Hi.
547
00:30:46,194 --> 00:30:48,370
Just checking in.
Oh, sure. Hi.
548
00:30:48,675 --> 00:30:50,938
- Anything else I need to prove?
Let's cut the shit.
549
00:30:52,505 --> 00:30:54,637
You're not with them, right?
You're not gonna murder me?
550
00:30:54,724 --> 00:30:57,466
- Are you actually asking me that?
- I really am. Yes.
551
00:30:58,206 --> 00:31:01,296
Well, if I was gonna murder you,
I wouldn't tell you.
I'd just murder you.
552
00:31:01,383 --> 00:31:04,212
Right, but I don't think
you're gonna. But just say it
so I can hear it.
553
00:31:04,299 --> 00:31:05,996
You're not gonna--No, I'm not gonna murder you.
554
00:31:06,083 --> 00:31:06,997
Are you gonna murder me?
555
00:31:07,171 --> 00:31:09,522
No, I wanna be
on the same team as you.
556
00:31:09,609 --> 00:31:10,436
Great.
557
00:31:11,437 --> 00:31:12,481
So that's settled.
558
00:31:13,177 --> 00:31:14,135
This feels good, right?
559
00:31:14,222 --> 00:31:15,310
- Mm-hmm.
- Right?
560
00:31:15,397 --> 00:31:16,877
- Mm-hmm.
- You think what I'm thinking?
561
00:31:16,964 --> 00:31:19,532
Mm-hmm. I hope so.
562
00:31:21,360 --> 00:31:24,363
You know what I think
we should do?
I think we should partner up.
563
00:31:24,450 --> 00:31:25,451
What does that mean, partner up?
564
00:31:25,799 --> 00:31:27,061
I mean, spend
all of our time together.
565
00:31:27,366 --> 00:31:29,368
They can't kill us if we're
together, right? The loophole.
566
00:31:31,195 --> 00:31:32,632
You wanna spend
all our time together
567
00:31:32,719 --> 00:31:33,763
after knowing me
for five minutes?
568
00:31:34,503 --> 00:31:36,766
Come on, let's just do this.
Let's team up.
Let's fucking win together.
569
00:31:37,201 --> 00:31:38,202
Right.
570
00:31:39,856 --> 00:31:42,903
I, I don't know if I'm ready to
say okay to the full 15 days.
571
00:31:47,386 --> 00:31:49,083
I couldn't understand
a word you said, buddy.
572
00:31:49,170 --> 00:31:51,607
I said, "Go for what
you can get."
573
00:31:52,652 --> 00:31:55,045
Would you be willing to
commit for the rest of today?
574
00:32:05,491 --> 00:32:06,666
Wow, look at this.
575
00:32:07,667 --> 00:32:09,320
- Beautiful house.
- Wow.
576
00:32:09,408 --> 00:32:10,626
Thanks.
- Yeah.
577
00:32:12,019 --> 00:32:14,369
Is it just you and, uh,
your parents here then?
578
00:32:14,456 --> 00:32:18,286
Uh, well, it's just me
and my Mom. My dad died.
579
00:32:18,808 --> 00:32:20,767
- Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
- No, it was a long time ago.
580
00:32:20,854 --> 00:32:23,073
- He was in a car accident.
- Oof.
581
00:32:23,160 --> 00:32:26,163
It was a drunk driver.
He was a drunk driver.
582
00:32:27,251 --> 00:32:29,645
He was a veteran though.
So his funeral
was really beautiful.
583
00:32:29,732 --> 00:32:32,474
He was kind of this, like,
beloved figure in the community.
584
00:32:32,561 --> 00:32:34,998
I don't know why
I'm saying all that.
585
00:32:35,085 --> 00:32:36,391
It's a lot of info.
586
00:32:37,914 --> 00:32:39,350
You guys wanna see
something weird?
587
00:32:39,438 --> 00:32:42,136
- Uh, yeah, sure.
- Sure, yeah.
588
00:32:43,877 --> 00:32:46,401
Oh, wow.
589
00:32:46,488 --> 00:32:48,447
What is this?
590
00:32:49,535 --> 00:32:51,667
Yeah, it started as a hobby.
591
00:32:51,754 --> 00:32:53,974
I've always liked
making just, like,
592
00:32:54,104 --> 00:32:57,717
weird little sculptures,
ceramics, that kind of thing.
593
00:32:57,804 --> 00:33:00,981
But Etsy's a wild place.
You know?
594
00:33:01,068 --> 00:33:05,594
The custom, like, dog things
for people's pets and stuff?
595
00:33:05,681 --> 00:33:06,769
It kind of sells like hot cakes.
596
00:33:08,467 --> 00:33:09,468
Did you hear that?
597
00:33:10,425 --> 00:33:12,558
- It's an old house, so.
- Right.
598
00:33:17,780 --> 00:33:20,740
Has that door
always been like that?
599
00:33:21,784 --> 00:33:23,525
I don't know, I don't mark it.
600
00:33:24,657 --> 00:33:27,311
Do you mind if I check it out?
601
00:33:27,398 --> 00:33:28,269
Yeah.
602
00:33:28,835 --> 00:33:30,967
- Do you mind coming with?
Yeah, of course.
603
00:33:36,538 --> 00:33:38,627
- Do you wanna hold hands?
- Yeah, sure.
604
00:33:52,859 --> 00:33:54,164
- Nothing, right?
- Yep.
605
00:33:54,687 --> 00:33:59,561
Just, um, Christmas decorations
and a couple embarrassing
old journals,
606
00:33:59,648 --> 00:34:02,085
I'm guessing.
That kind of thing.
607
00:34:03,478 --> 00:34:04,610
And a camera.
608
00:34:05,088 --> 00:34:06,829
No.
- Yeah.
609
00:34:07,351 --> 00:34:11,181
- The ninjas have been here.
- Holy shit.
610
00:34:12,356 --> 00:34:14,402
Little fucking snakes.
611
00:34:15,795 --> 00:34:17,623
Well, I've never been married,
612
00:34:17,710 --> 00:34:21,931
but I never wanted to.
I just like my freedom.
613
00:34:22,018 --> 00:34:23,411
Well, I've had a lot
of love affairs,
614
00:34:23,542 --> 00:34:25,544
but then, um, who hasn't?
615
00:34:26,719 --> 00:34:28,721
I'm sorry, ma'am.
What was your question?
616
00:34:30,331 --> 00:34:31,898
I didn't ask one.
617
00:34:32,072 --> 00:34:33,900
- Oh.
- I was married once, James.
618
00:34:34,030 --> 00:34:35,945
I regret it.
Should have stayed single.
619
00:34:36,076 --> 00:34:39,079
- My ex was a pain in the ass.
- Oh, boy. I'll say so.
620
00:34:39,166 --> 00:34:43,083
I was never married,
but I did date a woman
for a long time. For 23 years.
621
00:34:43,605 --> 00:34:44,911
- Did you say 23?
- Yeah.
622
00:34:44,998 --> 00:34:46,347
- Of dating?
- Yes.
623
00:34:46,434 --> 00:34:49,045
We felt married. We just never
did the paperwork. But...
624
00:34:49,176 --> 00:34:50,569
Well, what happened?
Why did it end?
625
00:34:51,352 --> 00:34:52,962
Uh... He doesn't know.
626
00:34:53,049 --> 00:34:54,050
Oh, thank you, James.
627
00:34:54,442 --> 00:34:56,139
We got together when we
were young. We were, like, 15.
628
00:34:56,226 --> 00:34:57,967
I thought we were gonna
be together forever.
629
00:34:58,054 --> 00:35:01,144
And then, um, I don't know,
I guess we grew apart.
630
00:35:01,231 --> 00:35:03,538
One day I came home and
she said that was it.
631
00:35:03,669 --> 00:35:05,540
And so, uh, so I left.
632
00:35:06,410 --> 00:35:07,324
And then what?
633
00:35:07,760 --> 00:35:09,500
He hasn't talked to the girl
since she dumped him.
634
00:35:09,588 --> 00:35:14,201
- What?
- Shut up, James, please.
635
00:35:14,680 --> 00:35:17,683
I've gone to her house
a lot to ask her.
636
00:35:17,770 --> 00:35:21,338
I just, I don't even know
what I would say.
637
00:35:21,425 --> 00:35:22,992
So you just broke-
You just don't know why
638
00:35:23,079 --> 00:35:24,777
- she broke up with you?
I don't.
639
00:35:24,864 --> 00:35:26,735
- Don't you wanna know?
- I would love to know.
640
00:35:26,822 --> 00:35:28,868
Is it killing you?
- It's killing me.
641
00:35:29,608 --> 00:35:31,087
Well, this is what
we're doing today.
642
00:35:32,611 --> 00:35:34,351
Oh, no, no, no, no.
I can't do that today.
643
00:35:34,438 --> 00:35:37,354
Oh, no. We need to find out.
If we're gonna be partners,
644
00:35:37,877 --> 00:35:40,401
I need to know
- what I'm dealing with.
- I don't think you need to know.
645
00:35:41,010 --> 00:35:42,316
Do you wanna be
my partner or not?
646
00:35:45,624 --> 00:35:49,628
Uh, this is delicious.
So what do you call it?
647
00:35:50,716 --> 00:35:51,847
Spaghetti.
648
00:36:21,007 --> 00:36:23,836
- Hi, Tommy.
- Hey, Theresa. How are ya?
649
00:36:25,968 --> 00:36:27,927
Seen you out here a few times.
650
00:36:29,189 --> 00:36:32,192
How's, uh, how's your baby?
651
00:36:32,322 --> 00:36:35,369
She is good. Her name
is Heather. She's almost one.
652
00:36:37,066 --> 00:36:40,504
Are you just here
to ask about the baby?
653
00:36:41,157 --> 00:36:43,725
I actually wanted
to ask you, um...
654
00:36:44,944 --> 00:36:49,078
how you felt about the, uh,
Ellen DeGeneres cancellation.
655
00:36:49,165 --> 00:36:50,819
I know what a big
fan you were of her show.
656
00:36:50,906 --> 00:36:53,039
Yes, I was very disappointed,
as you can imagine.
657
00:36:53,126 --> 00:36:54,780
I've been dying to ask you.
658
00:36:55,476 --> 00:36:57,652
I mean, all the red flags
were there.
I should have known, but...
659
00:36:58,479 --> 00:37:00,263
Really fucked
with my afternoon schedules.
660
00:37:01,787 --> 00:37:02,657
What do you want?
661
00:37:03,789 --> 00:37:07,575
A friend encouraged me
to come here and ask you
why you broke up with me.
662
00:37:08,141 --> 00:37:10,056
You know why I broke up
- with you.
- I don't. Just tell me.
663
00:37:10,143 --> 00:37:11,013
- Yes, you do.
- No, I don't.
664
00:37:11,274 --> 00:37:12,449
We talked about it
so many times. You know.
665
00:37:12,536 --> 00:37:13,842
We never talked.
I don't know why.
666
00:37:13,929 --> 00:37:16,802
I don't. If I knew,
I wouldn't be here, okay?
667
00:37:16,889 --> 00:37:18,847
And look, I- obviously,
we had our, our problems,
668
00:37:18,934 --> 00:37:21,763
but I mean, fuck,
we were together forever.
669
00:37:22,155 --> 00:37:23,156
We...
670
00:37:23,634 --> 00:37:25,288
We were supposed
to make it work.
671
00:37:25,375 --> 00:37:27,421
Yeah.
- That was our fucking deal.
672
00:37:27,508 --> 00:37:30,119
Yeah, I thought so too.
673
00:37:30,511 --> 00:37:33,601
But your version of being
together is just existing
674
00:37:33,688 --> 00:37:35,429
and I needed more from life.
675
00:37:35,864 --> 00:37:38,040
Right. I don't know
what that means.
676
00:37:38,127 --> 00:37:41,043
For years, we just did
the same things all the time.
677
00:37:41,130 --> 00:37:42,741
We just went to
the same restaurants,
678
00:37:42,828 --> 00:37:44,438
and ate the same foods,
and sat in the same chairs,
679
00:37:44,525 --> 00:37:47,180
just to, like,
not feel anything.
680
00:37:47,310 --> 00:37:50,531
But at a certain point,
I wanted to feel things,
good and bad.
681
00:37:50,618 --> 00:37:52,794
And I wanted you there with me.
682
00:37:53,273 --> 00:37:55,057
And I really tried.
683
00:37:55,144 --> 00:37:57,494
And you didn't wanna do that.
You never wanted to do that.
684
00:37:57,581 --> 00:37:59,453
You just wanted to fucking hide.
685
00:37:59,583 --> 00:38:02,456
You were just, like, stuck
and you refused to move.
686
00:38:02,586 --> 00:38:05,546
It's like you're
so afraid of feeling
that you're already dead.
687
00:38:06,242 --> 00:38:09,115
I had a lot of shit
to deal with,
and I've been working on it,
688
00:38:09,202 --> 00:38:11,378
and I have fought
to get better...
689
00:38:14,381 --> 00:38:17,514
but I don't think you wanted
to do that fight,
so I had to leave.
690
00:38:19,516 --> 00:38:21,605
Well, what would you do
if I told you, uh,
691
00:38:21,692 --> 00:38:23,869
I got better too?
What would you say then?
692
00:38:23,999 --> 00:38:29,222
Yeah, well, then I would have
to ask you who that man is.
693
00:38:34,923 --> 00:38:36,751
This is an awkward time
to explain.
694
00:38:37,752 --> 00:38:38,884
Give it a shot.
695
00:38:39,362 --> 00:38:40,581
This is James.
696
00:38:40,842 --> 00:38:44,498
He follows me for a dark web
game where I'm being hunted
697
00:38:44,585 --> 00:38:46,456
for my life
and he keeps me safe.
698
00:38:47,980 --> 00:38:49,198
Right.
699
00:38:50,896 --> 00:38:54,682
Tommy, you have to deal
with your emotions.
700
00:38:54,769 --> 00:38:56,989
Okay? You deserve
better than this.
701
00:38:57,076 --> 00:38:57,903
You know what?
702
00:38:58,773 --> 00:38:59,730
Thank you.
703
00:39:00,731 --> 00:39:02,821
Thank you. I actually
owe you one.
704
00:39:02,951 --> 00:39:04,823
'Cause he's awesome
and now he's mine.
705
00:39:05,606 --> 00:39:08,348
- Cool. Who is she?
I'm his partner.
706
00:39:09,001 --> 00:39:11,525
And we're gonna go live
the fuck out of every day
707
00:39:11,612 --> 00:39:13,135
'cause we could die
at any moment.
708
00:39:13,222 --> 00:39:14,876
Yes.
Yeah.
709
00:39:15,790 --> 00:39:17,705
And congratulations
on your baby.
710
00:39:17,836 --> 00:39:19,968
You look, I mean,
honestly, you look stunning.
711
00:39:20,055 --> 00:39:22,144
I'm so sorry. This isn't
about- this isn't about me.
712
00:39:22,231 --> 00:39:23,798
I'm so sorry.
I'm really, I'm gonna go.
713
00:39:29,412 --> 00:39:30,413
Take care, Tommy.
714
00:39:31,937 --> 00:39:33,068
Yeah, you too.
715
00:39:36,115 --> 00:39:37,072
Bye, James.
716
00:39:51,347 --> 00:39:53,828
- Good try, buddy.
- Thanks, pal.
717
00:39:53,915 --> 00:39:56,135
I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.
718
00:39:56,222 --> 00:39:57,745
I thought that was
gonna be, like, funny,
719
00:39:57,832 --> 00:39:59,834
or I don't know what I thought.
That was awful.
720
00:39:59,921 --> 00:40:00,791
That was so awful.
721
00:40:01,140 --> 00:40:02,358
It's okay. It's okay.
It needed to happen.
722
00:40:02,445 --> 00:40:03,664
- Really?
- Yes. I'm glad.
723
00:40:03,751 --> 00:40:06,623
Okay. Partners? I'm so sorry.
724
00:40:06,710 --> 00:40:07,973
- Yes. Partners.
- Partners?
725
00:40:08,060 --> 00:40:09,626
Okay, can we do something
fun, please?
726
00:40:09,713 --> 00:40:10,627
Yes, please.
727
00:40:11,150 --> 00:40:12,803
Like, what's the most
fun thing you can think of?
728
00:40:35,826 --> 00:40:38,786
I am so glad we're playing
this game together.
729
00:40:39,569 --> 00:40:42,137
- I love dancing.
- It is so fun.
730
00:40:42,224 --> 00:40:45,053
I'm so bad at it.
- You're so good at it.
731
00:40:45,140 --> 00:40:47,273
I'm better than you
but I'm really bad.
732
00:40:48,578 --> 00:40:51,668
All right, here you go.
I'm good. Thanks, bud.
733
00:40:54,193 --> 00:40:56,630
Um, I need
to tell you something.
734
00:40:56,717 --> 00:40:58,197
- Okay.
- Uh...
735
00:40:58,806 --> 00:41:01,287
My, uh, Dad didn't die.
I lied about that.
736
00:41:03,071 --> 00:41:05,856
He and my mom split up
when I was 10.
737
00:41:05,944 --> 00:41:09,121
It wasn't dramatic.
Um, no fights or anything.
738
00:41:09,295 --> 00:41:11,384
They just kind of drifted apart
739
00:41:11,471 --> 00:41:12,994
and neither of them
fought for the marriage.
740
00:41:13,081 --> 00:41:17,694
So now, um, my nightmare is
to be in that relationship,
741
00:41:17,781 --> 00:41:21,611
and I, uh, kind of end
up in these situations
742
00:41:21,698 --> 00:41:23,744
with overly dramatic people.
743
00:41:24,049 --> 00:41:28,531
Um, but then I get, like,
overwhelmed by their shit
744
00:41:28,618 --> 00:41:29,576
and I leave.
745
00:41:32,579 --> 00:41:34,146
Well, thanks for the honesty.
746
00:41:40,239 --> 00:41:44,547
When I was 10, my dad
vanished from the family.
747
00:41:45,244 --> 00:41:47,159
We were just hanging out
and everything was fine,
748
00:41:47,246 --> 00:41:49,422
and he and I stayed up
really late together.
749
00:41:49,509 --> 00:41:51,554
And we were playing
video games and laughing.
750
00:41:51,641 --> 00:41:54,166
And it was one of the most fun
nights I'd ever had with him.
751
00:41:54,993 --> 00:41:56,820
And then when I woke up,
he was gone.
752
00:41:56,907 --> 00:42:00,302
And we all looked for him
and we called the police.
753
00:42:02,304 --> 00:42:04,176
There was, like,
no trace of him.
754
00:42:09,616 --> 00:42:11,792
This has been
an interesting day.
755
00:42:11,879 --> 00:42:13,446
- Right?
- Yeah.
756
00:42:14,229 --> 00:42:18,668
It's been a fascinating,
uh, first day,
757
00:42:18,755 --> 00:42:21,410
of our partnership
in this game together.
758
00:42:21,671 --> 00:42:22,846
Do you wanna get outta here?
759
00:42:22,933 --> 00:42:25,675
Sure. Um, where to?
760
00:42:26,154 --> 00:42:28,548
I'm sorry I didn't want James
staying here,
761
00:42:28,635 --> 00:42:31,899
but I think he was content
with the hotel room I got him.
762
00:42:31,986 --> 00:42:34,902
Oh, he was really fired up
about that hotel room tonight.
763
00:42:34,989 --> 00:42:37,557
- He's excited for the time off.
- Yeah, and, and again,
764
00:42:37,644 --> 00:42:40,038
thank you for agreeing
to sleep like this.
765
00:42:40,125 --> 00:42:41,735
You know,
I'm sorry I'm old school.
766
00:42:41,822 --> 00:42:42,953
So I just thought it would be...
767
00:42:43,084 --> 00:42:44,042
Mom, stop....better if...
768
00:42:44,129 --> 00:42:45,521
- Stop, stop, Mom.
- Okay, okay.
769
00:42:46,000 --> 00:42:48,350
So, again, you're welcome
to use the guest room
770
00:42:48,437 --> 00:42:51,832
if you want and have your
own bed. But it's up to you.
771
00:42:51,919 --> 00:42:54,139
That's really sweet of you.
But I obviously can't be
772
00:42:54,226 --> 00:42:55,531
away from your daughter
or I'm gonna--
773
00:42:55,618 --> 00:42:59,666
Oh, oh, right. Or you'll
get murdered. I forgot.
774
00:42:59,753 --> 00:43:01,276
Oh, you know what?
775
00:43:01,363 --> 00:43:04,279
I can't talk to you about this.
This is too weird.
776
00:43:04,584 --> 00:43:07,195
You know, you're an adult
so I assume you know
777
00:43:07,282 --> 00:43:09,371
what you're doing, so goodnight.
778
00:43:09,458 --> 00:43:13,201
And I hope no one murders
either of you.
779
00:43:18,728 --> 00:43:21,601
- I'm sorry about my Mom.
- No, she's great.
780
00:43:21,688 --> 00:43:23,690
This is great.
781
00:43:23,777 --> 00:43:25,953
- Thank God this is here.
- Yeah, for sure.
782
00:43:27,563 --> 00:43:28,738
Otherwise it would be weird.
783
00:43:30,175 --> 00:43:32,481
Yeah, it would be weird
without it. For sure.
784
00:43:37,530 --> 00:43:38,400
All right.
785
00:43:40,141 --> 00:43:41,055
Good day.
786
00:43:41,403 --> 00:43:43,013
- Glad we met.
- Mm-hmm.
787
00:43:55,287 --> 00:43:56,288
Goodnight.
788
00:43:56,766 --> 00:43:59,291
Goodnight.
789
00:44:28,189 --> 00:44:29,495
Wake up.
790
00:44:29,582 --> 00:44:30,452
My God.
791
00:44:33,368 --> 00:44:35,892
- Are you a ninja?
- Production assistant, yeah.
792
00:44:36,806 --> 00:44:38,634
Why are you letting me see you?
793
00:44:38,721 --> 00:44:40,593
Well, you're all of
our favorite character.
794
00:44:40,680 --> 00:44:42,899
We think you play
with a lot of heart.
795
00:44:42,986 --> 00:44:44,074
Thanks.
796
00:44:44,162 --> 00:44:46,642
You are not as safe
as you think you are.
797
00:44:46,729 --> 00:44:48,078
We wanted to warn you.
798
00:44:49,210 --> 00:44:52,257
Why do you keep saying "we"
when you're all by yourself?
799
00:45:08,708 --> 00:45:09,883
Hi, guys.
800
00:45:14,409 --> 00:45:17,586
You need to go.
You are not safe here.
801
00:45:17,717 --> 00:45:19,458
Yes, I am. I'm with Maddy.
802
00:45:20,328 --> 00:45:22,461
Shh.
803
00:45:23,244 --> 00:45:24,245
Look.
804
00:45:29,468 --> 00:45:33,994
Be careful. They're close.
Closer than you think.
805
00:45:53,666 --> 00:45:55,450
What the fuck?
806
00:46:00,499 --> 00:46:01,891
Holy-Oh my God.
807
00:46:06,635 --> 00:46:08,202
- Where were you?
- I was getting water.
808
00:46:08,289 --> 00:46:10,683
We need to go to a motel
right now, Maddy.
809
00:46:10,770 --> 00:46:12,946
- Is this about my Mom?
- What?
810
00:46:13,251 --> 00:46:14,991
Is this about, like,
the sleeping situation?
811
00:46:15,078 --> 00:46:17,298
No, it's not about
your Mom, it's about...
812
00:46:17,907 --> 00:46:20,083
There was a bunch of
contortionist ninjas in here.
813
00:46:20,170 --> 00:46:21,998
They came out of there and he,
814
00:46:22,085 --> 00:46:25,045
there was, like, six of them
in here and they told me
that it wasn't safe
815
00:46:25,132 --> 00:46:27,787
and I was in danger and we
needed to go someplace safer.
816
00:46:28,309 --> 00:46:30,050
We can just move the pillows.
817
00:46:32,052 --> 00:46:34,141
It's not about the pillows. Okay.
818
00:46:39,189 --> 00:46:41,409
♪ I had a dream ♪
819
00:46:42,976 --> 00:46:45,587
♪ She took my hand
820
00:46:47,067 --> 00:46:51,332
♪ Led me to a wonderland
821
00:46:51,419 --> 00:46:52,507
How's this?
822
00:46:52,855 --> 00:46:55,162
Yeah, it's better, right?
Oh, great.
823
00:47:00,689 --> 00:47:02,082
Get up.
824
00:47:02,735 --> 00:47:04,345
No, I'm tired.
I wanna go to sleep.
825
00:47:04,432 --> 00:47:06,216
Please come out here
- just for a second.
What?
826
00:47:06,304 --> 00:47:07,957
'Cause I can't.
I can't go out there alone.
Please.
827
00:47:08,044 --> 00:47:09,437
No.
- Please.
828
00:47:10,830 --> 00:47:12,484
Thank you.
829
00:47:16,139 --> 00:47:17,663
- It's very nice.
It's really--
830
00:47:17,750 --> 00:47:19,317
- It's very pretty.
It's pretty.
831
00:47:23,843 --> 00:47:27,194
Do you mind telling me why
you agreed to play the game?
832
00:47:27,934 --> 00:47:29,457
Why are you asking me this now?
833
00:47:29,544 --> 00:47:31,546
I'm just so curious.
834
00:47:36,595 --> 00:47:38,510
I was very bored.
835
00:47:39,815 --> 00:47:42,035
Like, dangerously bored.
836
00:47:42,470 --> 00:47:45,125
I felt like I needed to do
something extreme
to shake things up.
837
00:47:46,126 --> 00:47:47,736
Why did you agree to do it?
838
00:47:50,086 --> 00:47:52,872
I guess I did it, uh,
'cause I was lonely.
839
00:47:53,002 --> 00:47:56,789
I felt so alone and,
uh, stuck in my routine.
840
00:47:56,876 --> 00:47:58,443
I didn't know how
to get out of it.
841
00:47:58,530 --> 00:48:02,360
And as soon as that fucking
guy mentioned the loophole,
842
00:48:03,491 --> 00:48:04,666
a light bulb went off.
843
00:48:04,840 --> 00:48:06,886
And I thought, "Well, that's
what I've been craving."
844
00:48:08,278 --> 00:48:11,151
I want to be around people more,
so I'll do that.
845
00:48:12,892 --> 00:48:14,067
And it's worked.
846
00:48:17,287 --> 00:48:20,290
Yeah. I think we sort of
did it for the same reason.
847
00:48:20,378 --> 00:48:23,163
I bet everybody
who's played this game
has done it for the same reason.
848
00:48:23,250 --> 00:48:24,556
- Maybe.
- Maybe.
849
00:48:25,905 --> 00:48:28,864
- Let's go to bed.
- Yeah, let's go to bed.
850
00:48:46,273 --> 00:48:49,494
Oh no. No. We're together.
851
00:48:55,064 --> 00:48:57,893
Hey, hey. Hey, man,
we're together.
852
00:48:57,980 --> 00:49:00,592
You can't do this, man.
Those aren't the rules.
853
00:49:00,722 --> 00:49:02,202
Sorry, maintenance.
I thought the room was empty.
854
00:49:02,289 --> 00:49:03,551
Oh, fucking bullshit with you.
855
00:49:03,638 --> 00:49:05,031
If you're maintenance
then why are you dressed
856
00:49:05,118 --> 00:49:06,380
like a Mario brother?
857
00:49:06,467 --> 00:49:07,425
Tommy?
858
00:49:07,903 --> 00:49:09,470
What do you mean Mario brother?
859
00:49:09,557 --> 00:49:11,080
You know what I mean.
Fucking look at you.
860
00:49:11,167 --> 00:49:12,734
Hey... No, I don't know what you mean.
861
00:49:12,821 --> 00:49:16,216
I'm also the manager of
this motel. This is our uniform.
862
00:49:16,303 --> 00:49:19,045
Well, what are you,
are you maintenance
or are you the fucking manager?
863
00:49:19,132 --> 00:49:20,176
Can't I be both?
864
00:49:20,307 --> 00:49:22,744
The, the uniform's
kind of ridiculous, so.
865
00:49:22,831 --> 00:49:25,399
Alright. I need
to improve the uniform.
866
00:49:26,444 --> 00:49:28,358
I'm sorry for interrupting
your sleep.
867
00:49:29,142 --> 00:49:31,927
Just stay out
of our fucking room, Mario.
You hear me?
868
00:49:32,014 --> 00:49:33,233
We're together now.
869
00:49:41,807 --> 00:49:42,634
Well...
870
00:49:45,941 --> 00:49:47,334
if I'm Mario...
871
00:49:48,814 --> 00:49:50,903
who does that make you, huh?
872
00:49:51,860 --> 00:49:54,428
Huh? King Koopa?
873
00:49:54,515 --> 00:49:55,603
What is King Koopa?
874
00:49:55,690 --> 00:49:57,866
What? You don't know
the characters?
875
00:49:57,953 --> 00:49:59,302
It's the bad guy
from Mario Brothers.
876
00:49:59,868 --> 00:50:02,001
- It's a really good reference.
- I'm not the bad guy.
You're the bad guy.
877
00:50:02,088 --> 00:50:03,306
I'm the guy trying to survive.
878
00:50:03,437 --> 00:50:06,527
So in your scenario
that make you Mario.
879
00:50:06,614 --> 00:50:08,268
Yeah, he's Mario.
880
00:50:08,573 --> 00:50:10,705
And that doesn't mean
I'm Princess Peach, by the way.
I'm fucking Luigi.
881
00:50:12,490 --> 00:50:15,623
You wanna be Luigi?
His twin brother?
882
00:50:16,537 --> 00:50:18,365
- Not the princess?
Well, I...
883
00:50:18,452 --> 00:50:21,455
I mean, I guess I wasn't
thinking about the fact that
it's like a bro--
884
00:50:21,542 --> 00:50:23,326
I guess Mario Brothers.
They are brothers.
885
00:50:23,413 --> 00:50:25,633
Yeah. I was just... I want it to be clear
886
00:50:25,720 --> 00:50:27,243
that it's, like, a partnership
and I feel like--
887
00:50:27,330 --> 00:50:30,290
Just stay out
of our fucking room.
How about that, man?
888
00:50:30,377 --> 00:50:31,509
'Cause we're together.
889
00:50:41,344 --> 00:50:43,695
Oh! Oh my gosh.
890
00:50:43,782 --> 00:50:46,132
Fucking Christ.
- Oh my God.
891
00:50:46,219 --> 00:50:47,481
- That was incredible.
- Yeah.
892
00:50:47,568 --> 00:50:49,004
Can you imagine if I
hadn't answered your ad?
893
00:50:49,265 --> 00:50:51,572
I'd just be asleep in bed,
and instead I'm
yelling at some guy
894
00:50:51,659 --> 00:50:53,966
at three in the morning,
calling him like
a Mario Brother.
895
00:50:54,053 --> 00:50:55,184
Okay, we gotta go.
896
00:50:55,271 --> 00:50:56,882
- What are you doing?
- We have to go obviously.
897
00:50:56,969 --> 00:50:59,145
- No, no, no, no, no, no.
- Yes, we do.
898
00:50:59,754 --> 00:51:01,974
It's just not safe here.
We have to go.
899
00:51:02,061 --> 00:51:03,628
Hey. No, no, no.
900
00:51:03,889 --> 00:51:05,630
- It's safe.
- It's not safe.
901
00:51:05,717 --> 00:51:08,023
Tommy. You're not serious.
Where would we even go?
902
00:51:08,110 --> 00:51:09,634
No, no, no, no, no, we're not...
903
00:51:09,721 --> 00:51:12,419
- We're not doing that.
- We have to do it.
904
00:51:13,246 --> 00:51:15,465
Tommy, we just-- We're fine.
905
00:51:18,251 --> 00:51:21,210
- Okay, you know what?
- I don't understand
what's happening.
906
00:51:21,297 --> 00:51:23,822
Here's what's happening.
Did you see how close he was?
907
00:51:23,909 --> 00:51:25,475
- Yes.
- Did you see how
aggressive he was?
908
00:51:25,563 --> 00:51:26,476
- Yes.
- I mean, he walked into our--
909
00:51:26,651 --> 00:51:28,087
And we're fine
'cause we're together.
910
00:51:29,305 --> 00:51:31,481
Right. But we have to be,
like, so perfect.
911
00:51:31,569 --> 00:51:32,570
Okay.
912
00:51:33,048 --> 00:51:34,659
It can't be as sloppy as it was
back at your house, right?
913
00:51:34,746 --> 00:51:36,791
Okay.
- It's gotta be 100 percent on.
914
00:51:36,878 --> 00:51:38,010
Okay.
- Or we're dead.
915
00:51:38,097 --> 00:51:40,882
Look, I really, really
like hanging with you.
916
00:51:40,969 --> 00:51:43,276
I feel like I have been
waiting for you.
917
00:51:43,363 --> 00:51:47,106
And now that I got you,
- I don't wanna die.
Okay.
918
00:51:48,107 --> 00:51:48,977
I'm...
919
00:51:51,371 --> 00:51:54,113
I'm not going anywhere.
920
00:51:55,288 --> 00:51:56,419
Okay?
921
00:51:56,550 --> 00:51:59,031
- Okay, I'm not going anywhere.
- Good, then...
922
00:51:59,640 --> 00:52:00,946
So then we have to
spend the next...
923
00:52:01,033 --> 00:52:02,338
Great....two weeks or so...
924
00:52:02,425 --> 00:52:03,557
Great....like fucking this.
925
00:52:03,731 --> 00:52:05,864
I'm not worried about it,
- are you?
- No, no.
926
00:52:06,691 --> 00:52:09,345
All right, well, I promise
I'm not going anywhere.
I'm with you.
927
00:52:09,432 --> 00:52:12,087
- You're not getting rid of me.
- Okay, good. Then we're--
928
00:52:12,174 --> 00:52:13,698
- We're together.
- Yeah.
929
00:52:16,004 --> 00:52:17,745
♪ My love ♪
930
00:52:17,919 --> 00:52:19,573
♪ Will you promise ♪
931
00:52:20,835 --> 00:52:22,663
♪ To be mine
932
00:52:23,229 --> 00:52:25,013
♪ And I'll be yours
933
00:52:26,014 --> 00:52:27,886
♪ When the roses grow
934
00:52:28,756 --> 00:52:30,540
♪ I'll be there to smile
935
00:52:31,324 --> 00:52:32,934
♪ And to kiss you
936
00:52:33,282 --> 00:52:35,545
♪ Love me more ♪
937
00:52:36,459 --> 00:52:38,461
♪ Only heaven knows
938
00:52:38,984 --> 00:52:40,855
♪ What's in store for us ♪
939
00:52:41,769 --> 00:52:43,510
♪ In this simple act
940
00:52:44,163 --> 00:52:45,817
♪ We call it love
941
00:52:47,427 --> 00:52:49,298
♪ You bet you can't deny
942
00:52:49,908 --> 00:52:51,953
♪ When your heart is bruised ♪
943
00:52:52,867 --> 00:52:56,218
♪ And yet you become his love
944
00:53:12,713 --> 00:53:13,671
Holy shit.
945
00:53:14,541 --> 00:53:17,936
There's another participant.
Look. Look.
946
00:53:18,676 --> 00:53:22,244
I am also playing.
I have info that you will want.
947
00:53:27,075 --> 00:53:28,642
We don't wanna do that, right?
948
00:53:29,164 --> 00:53:30,470
I mean, we have to see.
949
00:53:31,384 --> 00:53:33,386
You wanna involve
somebody else? Now?
950
00:53:34,430 --> 00:53:36,432
I feel like we've got
a pretty good thing going here.
951
00:53:36,519 --> 00:53:39,305
- I would rather not fuck it up.
- Right.
952
00:53:39,871 --> 00:53:42,438
I'm feeling really good.
953
00:53:43,048 --> 00:53:45,398
Like, kind of better than
I've felt in a while.
954
00:53:45,528 --> 00:53:46,878
Sorry, are you listening?
955
00:53:47,748 --> 00:53:51,621
Yeah, yeah. I'm sorry. I am.
There's another person playing.
956
00:53:51,709 --> 00:53:53,798
Hey, you're not listening.
It sucks.
957
00:53:56,061 --> 00:53:56,975
Maddy.
958
00:53:58,150 --> 00:54:01,109
They could be playing the game
and they could be alone
959
00:54:01,196 --> 00:54:03,503
and in danger and we could help.
960
00:54:04,112 --> 00:54:06,636
Do you remember how we were
before we met each other?
961
00:54:06,724 --> 00:54:10,031
How fucking scary that was?
How lonely we were?
962
00:54:10,728 --> 00:54:14,209
Well, they could be
like this right now
and we could help them.
963
00:54:15,254 --> 00:54:16,124
Right?
964
00:54:17,212 --> 00:54:19,606
Or they could help us.
965
00:54:19,693 --> 00:54:21,390
They could have information
that changes our game.
966
00:54:21,477 --> 00:54:23,828
We don't know. We have to try.
967
00:54:23,915 --> 00:54:25,960
And what is there?
What, what's the risk?
968
00:54:28,267 --> 00:54:30,791
Nothing. We have
each other. Right?
969
00:54:32,010 --> 00:54:32,880
Right.
970
00:54:34,360 --> 00:54:39,495
But this could be huge for us.
This could help
our game so much.
971
00:54:57,078 --> 00:54:57,905
Sit down.
972
00:55:03,345 --> 00:55:07,088
- How many days you got left?
- I'm 11. She's, uh, 10.
973
00:55:11,179 --> 00:55:12,050
What's so funny?
974
00:55:13,051 --> 00:55:16,532
I don't wanna burst your bubble,
man, but the game is a joke.
975
00:55:16,619 --> 00:55:17,707
They're laughing at us.
976
00:55:19,057 --> 00:55:22,364
Oh, that's good to know.
977
00:55:22,843 --> 00:55:25,846
Right? It's a good
thing we met you.
978
00:55:25,933 --> 00:55:28,370
Yeah, that's probably everything
we need though. We should--
979
00:55:28,457 --> 00:55:29,676
You don't wanna know
how the game works?
980
00:55:29,763 --> 00:55:30,895
I do want
to know how the game works.
981
00:55:31,634 --> 00:55:33,375
Well, we're still playing.
So I don't--Of course, yeah. Please tell us.
982
00:55:33,375 --> 00:55:37,684
They pick a certain type
of contestant.
You wanna know what the type is?
983
00:55:37,771 --> 00:55:39,120
- Analytical.
- Kinda cute.
984
00:55:39,207 --> 00:55:40,208
Hell no.
985
00:55:40,774 --> 00:55:43,429
They pick people really going
through shit. Like, struggling.
986
00:55:43,516 --> 00:55:45,518
Those are the ones
they take advantage of.
987
00:55:45,605 --> 00:55:48,695
The kind of people when other
people start to doubt them,
988
00:55:49,000 --> 00:55:50,392
they doubt themselves too.
989
00:55:52,438 --> 00:55:53,395
Right.
990
00:55:54,222 --> 00:55:56,529
Tom, I think we should go.
991
00:55:57,269 --> 00:55:58,879
You guys ready
for the other surprise?
992
00:55:58,966 --> 00:56:00,272
- Yeah.
- Not really.
993
00:56:00,750 --> 00:56:02,404
The show is a comedy.
994
00:56:03,144 --> 00:56:05,538
How's it a comedy?
They're trying
to fucking kill us.
995
00:56:05,625 --> 00:56:07,018
That's it right there.
996
00:56:07,409 --> 00:56:10,760
The people trying to kill you
are dressed up
just to get some laughs.
997
00:56:10,848 --> 00:56:13,938
Like me, I'm getting hunted
by a sumo wrestler
998
00:56:14,025 --> 00:56:16,157
and a guy dressed like Sinbad.
999
00:56:16,244 --> 00:56:17,463
A sumo wrestler?
1000
00:56:18,594 --> 00:56:20,814
And Sinbad, like, the comedian?
1001
00:56:20,901 --> 00:56:23,861
Yeah. And they're
dangerous as fuck too.
1002
00:56:23,948 --> 00:56:27,952
So the show's, like, um,
like, "Let's Make a Deal."
1003
00:56:28,039 --> 00:56:30,041
Is that the one
with Wayne Brady?
1004
00:56:30,128 --> 00:56:32,260
Yeah, it's actually-
It's a surprisingly good show.
1005
00:56:32,347 --> 00:56:34,828
- He's a great host.
- No surprises there at all.
1006
00:56:34,959 --> 00:56:36,438
That motherfucker is all talent.
1007
00:56:36,525 --> 00:56:37,526
I've never seen the show.
1008
00:56:37,613 --> 00:56:38,527
Yes.
- It's fun.
1009
00:56:38,963 --> 00:56:41,139
It's a good show.
- Okay, I'll check it out.
1010
00:56:41,226 --> 00:56:44,098
Do you even know the
title of the show you're on?
1011
00:56:44,185 --> 00:56:45,143
No, they never told me.
1012
00:56:45,230 --> 00:56:46,622
- Did they tell you?
- No.
1013
00:56:48,146 --> 00:56:52,933
DOG. D, period, O, period, G.
Delusions of Grandeur.
1014
00:56:53,412 --> 00:56:55,936
You're stuck in a spider
web and don't even know it.
1015
00:56:56,023 --> 00:56:58,983
Charlie. Enough's enough.
It's time to go.
1016
00:56:59,679 --> 00:57:02,856
Bring your ass on. Now.
Gonna sit in the car.
1017
00:57:02,943 --> 00:57:06,686
That's my Dad.
He's on one. I gotta go.
1018
00:57:13,345 --> 00:57:14,781
I don't even know, uh...
1019
00:57:16,391 --> 00:57:20,178
- what to say.
- Yeah, um, I need to go home.
1020
00:57:20,874 --> 00:57:22,310
Yeah?
- Yeah.
1021
00:57:22,397 --> 00:57:23,398
Great, yeah. That's smart.
1022
00:57:24,008 --> 00:57:25,531
Just to get closer to the people
and places we're familiar with.
1023
00:57:25,618 --> 00:57:28,316
No um, I'm gonna, I think
I'm gonna go home alone.
1024
00:57:28,403 --> 00:57:30,710
What does that mean, alone?
Without me?
1025
00:57:30,797 --> 00:57:32,886
Yeah, I just need,
need the night at least
1026
00:57:32,973 --> 00:57:35,019
to kind of breathe.
Does that make sense?
1027
00:57:35,106 --> 00:57:38,848
Uh, emotionally, yeah.
In terms of the game,
no, not at all.
1028
00:57:39,197 --> 00:57:41,242
Um, okay. How about this?
1029
00:57:41,329 --> 00:57:43,897
I can just drive you
wherever you want to go.
1030
00:57:43,984 --> 00:57:46,552
And maybe tomorrow
we can check in and,
1031
00:57:46,639 --> 00:57:48,293
and see where we're at kind of.
1032
00:57:48,554 --> 00:57:50,948
Or, or, or, sorry.
1033
00:57:51,470 --> 00:57:54,125
Or we could go back to the
motel and I'll just give you,
1034
00:57:54,212 --> 00:57:56,170
- I'll just give you more space.
Right.
1035
00:57:56,301 --> 00:57:57,867
The motel where we sleep
in the same bed
1036
00:57:57,955 --> 00:57:59,608
and we can't be more
than three feet apart.
1037
00:57:59,739 --> 00:58:01,741
Well, we can--I can take, I can take
you wherever you want.
1038
00:58:01,828 --> 00:58:04,135
And I'll, I'll wait until
somebody's with you.
1039
00:58:05,049 --> 00:58:07,747
I think this is a really bad
idea and they could kill us.
1040
00:58:07,834 --> 00:58:11,055
Yeah, um...
1041
00:58:12,491 --> 00:58:14,536
I'm okay with you thinking that.
1042
00:58:20,847 --> 00:58:22,892
Maddy. Maddy, please.
1043
00:58:23,589 --> 00:58:29,377
Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you.
Fuck you. Fuck you.
Fuck you. Fuck you.
1044
00:58:29,464 --> 00:58:30,335
What is happening?
1045
00:58:30,988 --> 00:58:32,250
I don't know where
the cameras are,
but I know they're here.
1046
00:58:32,467 --> 00:58:34,426
I know you guys have been here.
You're sneaky as fuck.
1047
00:58:34,556 --> 00:58:35,993
And I know that the ninjas
have been here.
1048
00:58:36,080 --> 00:58:38,299
I know the real name.
Delusions of Grandeur.
1049
00:58:38,386 --> 00:58:40,910
Fuck off. I got it.
Very clever. And guess what?
1050
00:58:40,998 --> 00:58:42,434
I don't care. And guess what?
1051
00:58:42,521 --> 00:58:44,262
You tried to get my
family not to believe me.
1052
00:58:44,349 --> 00:58:48,701
Well, I got James.
And guess what?
He's become a friend.
1053
00:58:48,788 --> 00:58:50,746
Maybe even a friend for life.
1054
00:58:50,833 --> 00:58:51,878
- This is your brother.
- Yeah.
1055
00:58:52,052 --> 00:58:53,358
And if I find out
Madeline gets hurt,
1056
00:58:53,749 --> 00:58:57,753
I'm gonna fucking
kill Andy Samberg.
Maddy dies, Samberg dies.
1057
00:58:57,840 --> 00:59:01,366
I'll turn that motherfucker
into a pinata.
You understand what I'm saying?
1058
00:59:01,496 --> 00:59:04,238
I'll put his head
on a fucking stick.
1059
00:59:04,456 --> 00:59:07,894
He'll be a little pinata boy.
1060
00:59:07,981 --> 00:59:11,115
Ya fucked with the wrong guy.
I'll kill Andy Samberg.
1061
00:59:26,782 --> 00:59:27,653
Tommy.
1062
00:59:30,221 --> 00:59:33,354
You gotta go. There's a limo
outside waiting for you.
1063
00:59:33,963 --> 00:59:37,619
I don't want to go
- to a limo right now.
- You don't have a choice.
1064
00:59:38,185 --> 00:59:39,969
Is this about...
1065
00:59:40,057 --> 00:59:42,885
...me saying I would
murder Andy Samberg?
1066
00:59:42,972 --> 00:59:45,801
I don't know.'Cause I, I would never do that.
1067
00:59:45,888 --> 00:59:47,803
I was just saying it
'cause I was mad.
1068
00:59:47,890 --> 00:59:50,850
- I don't know. You gotta go.
- Am I in trouble?
1069
00:59:50,937 --> 00:59:52,069
I don't know.
1070
00:59:53,896 --> 00:59:54,810
Let's go.
1071
01:00:51,650 --> 01:00:52,564
Hi, Tommy.
1072
01:00:54,392 --> 01:00:55,306
Hi, Dad.
1073
01:00:57,395 --> 01:00:58,526
How's your mother?
1074
01:00:59,832 --> 01:01:02,965
She's good, yeah. Mom's doing-Mary? Amy?
1075
01:01:03,488 --> 01:01:06,099
Good. Everybody's doing really
good in the last 30 years.
1076
01:01:06,186 --> 01:01:07,318
How are you?
1077
01:01:07,405 --> 01:01:09,842
Oh, real good.
1078
01:01:10,886 --> 01:01:11,844
Actually...
1079
01:01:13,150 --> 01:01:16,370
Living in Cleveland, sober.
1080
01:01:16,457 --> 01:01:19,112
I'm sorry, uh, what, uh...
1081
01:01:20,722 --> 01:01:23,856
- What are you doing here?
- Right.
1082
01:01:23,943 --> 01:01:25,466
And I don't mean
to be rude, Dad.
1083
01:01:25,553 --> 01:01:27,947
I'm just trying to do the math
on what the fuck's happening.
1084
01:01:28,034 --> 01:01:30,210
I didn't
expect to see you.
1085
01:01:30,297 --> 01:01:33,474
Well, yeah.
Yeah.
1086
01:01:33,561 --> 01:01:38,305
I'm here to tell you...
that Madeline is unharmed.
1087
01:01:39,219 --> 01:01:40,699
What are you talking about?
1088
01:01:43,484 --> 01:01:49,186
A few hours ago, a guy named
Wayne Brady knocked on my door.
1089
01:01:49,273 --> 01:01:51,579
Next thing I know...
1090
01:01:51,666 --> 01:01:54,452
...I'm on a, a private jet.
1091
01:01:55,844 --> 01:01:57,803
Now I'm sitting here with you.
1092
01:01:58,717 --> 01:02:03,591
All right, Dad, well,
this was interesting but, um...
1093
01:02:04,288 --> 01:02:05,158
Tommy.
1094
01:02:07,204 --> 01:02:09,728
When I, I left,
1095
01:02:09,815 --> 01:02:11,730
when you and me stayed up--Hey.
1096
01:02:11,817 --> 01:02:14,646
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,
hey, hey, hey. No.
1097
01:02:14,733 --> 01:02:16,952
No. No.
1098
01:02:17,039 --> 01:02:19,041
Don't do this right now.
1099
01:02:19,781 --> 01:02:22,523
I can't do the big fucking
Dad talk right now.
1100
01:02:24,003 --> 01:02:28,877
What the fuck is going on now?
We're doing a Dad talk?
1101
01:02:28,964 --> 01:02:32,446
If I try to do a Dad talk, my
fucking head is gonna explode.
1102
01:02:32,533 --> 01:02:34,187
I understand.
1103
01:02:34,883 --> 01:02:36,537
I mean, don't get me wrong.
1104
01:02:37,973 --> 01:02:41,238
I have wanted to have
this moment with you
1105
01:02:42,239 --> 01:02:45,503
since the night
you fucking left.
1106
01:02:45,590 --> 01:02:51,465
I've dreamt of this fucking
moment, man. But not now.
1107
01:02:51,552 --> 01:02:55,295
'Cause all I'm thinking about
now is Madeline's safety.
1108
01:02:55,382 --> 01:02:57,863
I like her so much.
1109
01:03:00,344 --> 01:03:04,130
I hope no one hurts her, son.
Or you.
1110
01:03:06,132 --> 01:03:10,571
And that you get to spend
your lives together.
1111
01:03:12,007 --> 01:03:16,316
Don't be like me.
Don't fuck up a good thing.
1112
01:03:20,015 --> 01:03:23,367
Hey, Dad.
1113
01:03:27,284 --> 01:03:30,287
Is this real-life right now?
Is this really happening?
1114
01:03:32,506 --> 01:03:33,812
I think so.
1115
01:03:38,556 --> 01:03:39,383
Okay.
1116
01:03:40,601 --> 01:03:41,472
Okay.
1117
01:03:43,996 --> 01:03:45,040
I love you, Dad.
1118
01:03:46,955 --> 01:03:48,130
Oh, man.
1119
01:03:49,480 --> 01:03:50,307
Mm-hmm.
1120
01:03:57,792 --> 01:03:59,403
- All right.
- Okay.
1121
01:04:06,061 --> 01:04:08,803
Been calling her for days.
Maybe she wants
some space.
1122
01:04:15,941 --> 01:04:17,246
Hi.
1123
01:04:17,377 --> 01:04:19,988
Hey, I've been trying you
for days. Are you okay?
1124
01:04:20,293 --> 01:04:22,426
- I'm fine. I'm fine.
You're safe?
Hundred percent?
1125
01:04:22,513 --> 01:04:23,427
Yeah.
1126
01:04:24,079 --> 01:04:27,735
Oh my God.
- Come here, please.
- Tommy. I was lying.
1127
01:04:27,822 --> 01:04:29,650
I know, we've been
over that. I don't care.
1128
01:04:29,737 --> 01:04:30,956
No. Tommy, about the game.
1129
01:04:32,218 --> 01:04:34,960
Um. I'm not playing a game.
1130
01:04:35,700 --> 01:04:39,051
- What are you talking about?
- I saw your ad and I...
1131
01:04:40,182 --> 01:04:44,317
...was really bored
and lonely, and um...
1132
01:04:45,579 --> 01:04:49,627
I thought it was a joke.
I thought this was like...
1133
01:04:51,411 --> 01:04:54,109
...roleplaying dating
or something...
1134
01:04:54,196 --> 01:04:56,024
What are you talking about?
What is this?
1135
01:04:56,155 --> 01:04:57,939
This is the truth. I...
1136
01:05:00,942 --> 01:05:02,944
I'm so sorry. I didn't know.
1137
01:05:05,599 --> 01:05:07,906
- Who got to you?
- Nobody.
1138
01:05:07,993 --> 01:05:10,256
Who told you to say this?
1139
01:05:11,388 --> 01:05:12,476
Tommy, nobody.
1140
01:05:12,606 --> 01:05:15,696
Yeah. Was it fucking
Wayne Brady?
1141
01:05:15,783 --> 01:05:17,742
Did Wayne Brady come here
and tell you to say that?
1142
01:05:17,829 --> 01:05:19,526
That son of a fucking bitch.
1143
01:05:19,613 --> 01:05:21,267
I can assure you Wayne Brady
was not here.
1144
01:05:26,054 --> 01:05:27,752
Oh, for fuck's sake.
1145
01:05:29,971 --> 01:05:31,973
- They got my Mom.
Who got your Mom?
1146
01:05:32,060 --> 01:05:33,932
Fucking hunters, Maddy.
1147
01:05:34,585 --> 01:05:38,240
Please, please keep up with me.
James, go as fast as you can!
1148
01:05:38,327 --> 01:05:40,591
Shit. Shit. Shit.
1149
01:05:51,340 --> 01:05:53,473
Ah!
- Ah, God.
1150
01:05:54,387 --> 01:05:58,217
Whoo. Hi.
I, I'm Ellen DeGeneres.
1151
01:05:58,913 --> 01:06:01,481
Sorry, but you don't really look
like Ellen DeGeneres to me.
1152
01:06:01,568 --> 01:06:04,528
You're probably
a little nervous,
'cause you're a big fan.
1153
01:06:04,615 --> 01:06:06,355
You've come to my taping before.
1154
01:06:06,573 --> 01:06:09,054
Yeah? You, you and, uh,
your ex-girlfriend, didn't you?
1155
01:06:09,141 --> 01:06:10,708
Yeah, we went.
How do you know that?
1156
01:06:10,795 --> 01:06:13,885
Well, get in the car, Tom.
We can talk about it in private.
1157
01:06:14,015 --> 01:06:16,017
But it's not a limousine.
1158
01:06:16,104 --> 01:06:18,324
Well, I, I like a Lincoln.
1159
01:06:18,411 --> 01:06:20,065
Why the fuck
would you like a Lincoln?
1160
01:06:20,152 --> 01:06:22,720
Come on, don't be a car snob.
Just, just get in the car.
1161
01:06:22,807 --> 01:06:24,504
- I'm not a car snob.
Tommy, please.
1162
01:06:24,591 --> 01:06:25,766
Why would you like
a Lincoln over a limo?
1163
01:06:28,247 --> 01:06:29,727
Get in the fucking car.
1164
01:06:30,075 --> 01:06:33,557
Hey, it's Ellen DeGeneres
from TV.
She's giving away guest blocks.
1165
01:06:33,644 --> 01:06:35,210
Tommy! What the hell
happened to you, man?
1166
01:06:35,297 --> 01:06:36,821
I got hit in the face.
1167
01:06:36,908 --> 01:06:39,171
Oh, well, that's what
happens when you go too fast.
1168
01:06:39,258 --> 01:06:41,652
- Here, gimme your hand.
- You gotta keep up with me, man.
1169
01:06:41,739 --> 01:06:43,958
Did you say
Ellen DeGeneres was here?
1170
01:06:44,045 --> 01:06:47,832
No, that wasn't Ellen DeGeneres.
It was a murderer, you asshole!
1171
01:06:47,962 --> 01:06:49,007
What?
1172
01:06:49,311 --> 01:06:51,792
- How's it look?
- Awful. Wipe your mouth.
1173
01:06:51,879 --> 01:06:53,098
Did you just call me an asshole?
1174
01:06:56,536 --> 01:06:57,494
Almost there.
1175
01:06:57,972 --> 01:07:00,322
Yeah, yeah, you said
that about ten minutes ago.
1176
01:07:00,409 --> 01:07:03,064
Okay, come on, come on.
Please, please, please.
Hurry up.
1177
01:07:09,462 --> 01:07:10,419
What is this?
1178
01:07:10,724 --> 01:07:12,596
What does it look like?
It's an intervention.
1179
01:07:12,683 --> 01:07:14,554
- For me?
- No, for Mom.
1180
01:07:14,641 --> 01:07:16,034
We're all just facing
the wrong direction.
1181
01:07:16,121 --> 01:07:17,992
What the hell happened
to your tooth?
1182
01:07:18,079 --> 01:07:21,692
Oh, I got hit in the face
by an Ellen DeGeneres
impersonator.
1183
01:07:21,822 --> 01:07:23,824
- Did it hurt?
- It was a pretty clean hit.
1184
01:07:23,911 --> 01:07:25,696
Yes, it hurt,
but it's kind of fine now.
1185
01:07:25,783 --> 01:07:27,480
Hi, Tom. I'm Lindsay.
1186
01:07:27,567 --> 01:07:29,961
I'm an interventionist
and I'd like to welcome you
1187
01:07:30,048 --> 01:07:31,571
to have a seat
with us for a while.
1188
01:07:31,876 --> 01:07:34,574
Hi, Lindsay. An inter...
What do you think?
I'm a drug addict?
1189
01:07:34,661 --> 01:07:38,360
- Do you think I'm on drugs?
- No, it's about
your mental health.
1190
01:07:38,447 --> 01:07:40,754
Or, I mean--
We're not really
sure what it is.
1191
01:07:40,841 --> 01:07:43,627
Or maybe it's about attention
or, like, Theresa dumped you.
1192
01:07:43,714 --> 01:07:45,193
Okay, well, then how
about fucking this?
1193
01:07:45,280 --> 01:07:48,066
I saw Theresa and we're good.
We talked.
1194
01:07:48,936 --> 01:07:50,242
Oh, yeah?
1195
01:07:50,721 --> 01:07:53,462
Okay, well, maybe it's about
Dad never being around.
1196
01:07:53,550 --> 01:07:54,768
I saw Dad.
1197
01:07:55,552 --> 01:07:57,249
He says hi to everybody.
1198
01:07:57,336 --> 01:08:01,383
Yeah, he lives in Cleveland.
He claims to be sober,
1199
01:08:01,470 --> 01:08:03,734
and he was pretty apologetic
about how he left.
1200
01:08:04,343 --> 01:08:05,779
You saw Dad?
1201
01:08:06,301 --> 01:08:08,477
Yeah, we were
in a limousine together.
1202
01:08:08,608 --> 01:08:12,743
Uh, Wayne Brady, um,
I guess found him
and put him on a private jet.
1203
01:08:14,658 --> 01:08:17,182
Wayne Brady's friends with Dad?
1204
01:08:17,312 --> 01:08:19,010
I'm not sure if Wayne
Brady's friends with him,
1205
01:08:19,097 --> 01:08:21,099
but yeah, that's what Dad said.
1206
01:08:21,186 --> 01:08:23,841
There are a lot of people in
this room who really love you.
1207
01:08:23,928 --> 01:08:25,277
So why don't you just
sit for a while.
1208
01:08:25,364 --> 01:08:27,540
Hey, hey. Tommy?
- What?
1209
01:08:27,627 --> 01:08:28,541
Just sit down.
1210
01:08:28,976 --> 01:08:31,283
No offense, but this woman
is ridiculously expensive,
1211
01:08:31,370 --> 01:08:32,719
so please, thank you.
1212
01:08:33,590 --> 01:08:37,985
Okay, we hired someone.
We hired someone to search
for your dark web show.
1213
01:08:38,072 --> 01:08:39,639
They found nothing, honey.
1214
01:08:42,860 --> 01:08:43,861
No thanks, buddy.
1215
01:08:45,819 --> 01:08:50,389
Well, maybe the person that
you hired is part of the game.
1216
01:08:50,519 --> 01:08:52,652
Have you brainiacs
ever thought of that?
1217
01:08:52,739 --> 01:08:55,568
- Maybe it's a setup.
Oh, Tommy.
1218
01:08:55,829 --> 01:08:59,137
Tommy, we've been down
this road so many times.
1219
01:08:59,224 --> 01:09:02,836
And it's not the first time
that you thought the world
was against you.
1220
01:09:02,923 --> 01:09:04,490
It just happens
to be the latest.
1221
01:09:05,752 --> 01:09:07,667
Honey, please accept it.
1222
01:09:14,282 --> 01:09:16,502
There's a ninja
out the window right now.
1223
01:09:16,633 --> 01:09:19,679
But don't look,
they'll just run away.
It'll make me look worse.
1224
01:09:19,766 --> 01:09:20,637
There's no ninja.
1225
01:09:20,985 --> 01:09:22,813
What's that ninja doing?
Something really cool?
1226
01:09:22,900 --> 01:09:25,598
Like, some back flips,
some kicks,
or are they just chilling?
1227
01:09:25,729 --> 01:09:26,947
Just chilling.
1228
01:09:27,208 --> 01:09:28,645
That's disappointing.
1229
01:09:28,906 --> 01:09:31,735
Flips would've been cool.
- Okay, stop it. It's not funny.
1230
01:09:31,822 --> 01:09:33,432
Used to be funny.
1231
01:09:33,954 --> 01:09:36,740
- Uh, excuse me, uh, Lindsay.
Yes.
1232
01:09:36,827 --> 01:09:38,698
This is a lot to take in, um,
1233
01:09:38,785 --> 01:09:41,092
and, um, I'm just wondering
before I make my decision
1234
01:09:41,179 --> 01:09:43,572
and we get to the letters,
if I can just take a minute.
1235
01:09:43,660 --> 01:09:47,576
Um, just to process and then I'm
happy to get in. Is that okay?
1236
01:09:48,186 --> 01:09:49,840
- Sure.
Thank you.
1237
01:09:52,146 --> 01:09:54,888
Would you stop fucking snacking
and come with me, man?
1238
01:09:55,672 --> 01:09:57,282
That's all you ever say to me.
1239
01:09:57,369 --> 01:09:59,110
Stop snacking is all
I say to you?
1240
01:09:59,197 --> 01:10:00,677
- Yeah.
- That's not it.
1241
01:10:00,764 --> 01:10:02,722
Oh, it isn't?
No.
1242
01:10:02,853 --> 01:10:04,419
Well, that went really bad.
1243
01:10:04,506 --> 01:10:07,074
I can't believe one tooth
can change a face so much.
1244
01:10:07,161 --> 01:10:08,772
- Right?
- Oh! There, he's running.
1245
01:10:08,859 --> 01:10:10,208
No, Tommy.
Go, go, go, go, go.
1246
01:10:10,295 --> 01:10:13,559
Oh, goddamn it.
I'm calling the police.
1247
01:10:17,998 --> 01:10:21,698
Man, I gotta admit, this
has been a lot of fun.
1248
01:10:22,437 --> 01:10:24,265
I agree, man.
1249
01:10:24,352 --> 01:10:27,747
It's been great having
you part of it, James.
It really has.
1250
01:10:27,834 --> 01:10:31,882
Also, you should know
my name's not James.
1251
01:10:31,969 --> 01:10:36,190
It's Walter.
1252
01:10:36,277 --> 01:10:39,411
- Is that true?
- Yes, that's true.
1253
01:10:39,498 --> 01:10:43,502
So why the fuck did you
tell me your name was James?
1254
01:10:43,589 --> 01:10:45,504
I didn't tell you my
name was James.
1255
01:10:45,591 --> 01:10:47,332
You just started
calling me James.
1256
01:10:47,419 --> 01:10:49,464
What?
1257
01:10:53,773 --> 01:10:57,298
- I just made up James?
- Yes, you did.
1258
01:10:57,821 --> 01:10:59,474
But don't worry about it, man.
1259
01:10:59,561 --> 01:11:00,737
Um--All right.
1260
01:11:01,259 --> 01:11:03,130
- We're friends now.
- Okay.
1261
01:11:03,478 --> 01:11:05,611
- Sorry I did that.
- So you should know my real name.
1262
01:11:05,698 --> 01:11:07,918
Yeah, I agree, man.
1263
01:11:08,005 --> 01:11:10,268
Sometimes my brain
does shit, man.
1264
01:11:13,619 --> 01:11:16,796
Well, Walter, when I win this
fucking game, which I will...
1265
01:11:17,884 --> 01:11:20,104
I'd like to buy you
a place, man.
1266
01:11:20,191 --> 01:11:22,889
- For reals?
- Hundred percent.
You deserve it, man.
1267
01:11:22,976 --> 01:11:24,325
- No, no.
- You're a great fucking guy.
1268
01:11:24,412 --> 01:11:25,413
- No, no, man.
- And I don't...
1269
01:11:25,849 --> 01:11:28,155
I don't want you
- living like this.
- It's too much.
1270
01:11:28,242 --> 01:11:29,374
We're friends, right?
1271
01:11:29,461 --> 01:11:30,941
- Yeah.
- So I got you.
1272
01:11:34,858 --> 01:11:35,946
Listen to me.
1273
01:11:36,990 --> 01:11:39,906
Keep your head in the game, kid.
1274
01:11:39,993 --> 01:11:43,475
Remember what you're doing.
Remember the rules.
1275
01:11:43,562 --> 01:11:47,696
You can win. Don't quit.
1276
01:11:52,223 --> 01:11:53,137
Okay.
1277
01:11:53,224 --> 01:11:54,573
- You're good?
- Yeah.
1278
01:11:54,660 --> 01:11:55,922
Okay. Me too.
1279
01:11:56,096 --> 01:11:59,099
Okay.
1280
01:11:59,230 --> 01:12:01,667
Boy, we are a toothless
bunch of old dudes, ain't we?
1281
01:12:19,424 --> 01:12:22,166
Excuse me. Have you seen the guy
I was with, with the big beard?
1282
01:12:28,999 --> 01:12:31,566
What the fuck is going on?
James!
1283
01:12:34,656 --> 01:12:35,614
Walter!
1284
01:12:49,410 --> 01:12:51,108
Have you seen the guy I
was with, with the big beard?
1285
01:12:53,197 --> 01:12:54,502
It's a dark web reality show.
1286
01:12:54,589 --> 01:12:56,243
I'm being hunted,
I just can't be alone.
1287
01:12:56,417 --> 01:12:59,116
So that's why I came here,
cause my family
doesn't trust me. So...
1288
01:13:08,473 --> 01:13:10,605
I'd prefer to go home,
believe me, you know,
1289
01:13:10,692 --> 01:13:13,086
but it's only a couple
more days, so...
1290
01:13:17,961 --> 01:13:20,354
So I've got about
24 hours left, and then I win.
1291
01:13:20,441 --> 01:13:22,530
That's it. That's it.
1292
01:13:36,240 --> 01:13:37,328
Wake up.
1293
01:13:42,289 --> 01:13:43,769
It's day 30, is it over?
1294
01:13:43,856 --> 01:13:45,640
- Did I win?
- No.
1295
01:13:46,380 --> 01:13:47,686
Then why are you here?
1296
01:13:48,208 --> 01:13:50,776
We're just here
to give you instructions
on the ending of the game.
1297
01:13:51,690 --> 01:13:52,604
Okay.
1298
01:13:53,431 --> 01:13:55,737
You can just bring out
the other ninjas,
I know they're here.
1299
01:14:03,745 --> 01:14:04,746
Hey.
1300
01:14:05,269 --> 01:14:07,271
So what happens now,
how does it end?
1301
01:14:07,358 --> 01:14:09,926
- There will be a limo.
- You need to get in it.
1302
01:14:10,013 --> 01:14:11,492
It will take you to the ending.
1303
01:14:12,189 --> 01:14:14,191
That's it. Those are
the instructions.
1304
01:14:14,278 --> 01:14:15,757
Okay, where's the limo?
1305
01:14:15,844 --> 01:14:18,586
I don't know, but, uh,
they did tell me to tell you
1306
01:14:18,673 --> 01:14:21,546
that you need to leave this area
to find the limo.
1307
01:14:21,633 --> 01:14:24,418
I have to leave here? Why?
1308
01:14:24,505 --> 01:14:26,333
They feel like the audience
is getting bored
1309
01:14:26,420 --> 01:14:28,074
watching you sleeping
under this bridge.
1310
01:14:28,161 --> 01:14:29,815
They feel like it's getting
a little depressing.
1311
01:14:29,902 --> 01:14:30,990
Really?
1312
01:14:31,077 --> 01:14:33,166
It is a comedy, remember?
1313
01:14:33,253 --> 01:14:35,081
Well, I'm sorry I'm not being
more entertaining,
1314
01:14:35,168 --> 01:14:36,909
but people are trying
to murder me.
1315
01:14:36,996 --> 01:14:40,260
We get it. But they do want
a more exciting ending.
1316
01:14:40,347 --> 01:14:42,219
That's why we got rid
of Walter in the first place.
1317
01:14:42,306 --> 01:14:44,873
They felt like your relationship
was too repetitive.
1318
01:14:44,961 --> 01:14:48,355
You took Walter?
You didn't hurt him, did you?
1319
01:14:48,442 --> 01:14:52,229
No, he's sleeping in a motel
right now until
you either win or die.
1320
01:14:52,316 --> 01:14:54,100
He's quite happy
with the set up.
1321
01:14:54,187 --> 01:14:56,015
Well I'm sure he is.
1322
01:14:56,102 --> 01:14:59,671
We recommend that you find
someone getting outta here
1323
01:14:59,758 --> 01:15:01,238
and you follow them.
1324
01:15:01,629 --> 01:15:03,588
- The limo will find you.
- Okay.
1325
01:15:04,545 --> 01:15:05,633
Maybe her?
1326
01:15:35,228 --> 01:15:37,839
Sir, why'd you follow me?
1327
01:15:37,926 --> 01:15:39,493
Oh, I wasn't following you.
1328
01:15:39,580 --> 01:15:42,018
We just both happened to be
doing the same thing.
1329
01:15:51,331 --> 01:15:53,464
How are you doing, Mr. Walcott?
1330
01:15:55,292 --> 01:15:57,816
Boy, you have been
one hell of a contestant.
1331
01:15:57,903 --> 01:15:59,513
Excuse me, can you see him?
1332
01:16:00,514 --> 01:16:02,299
Stop talking to me.
1333
01:16:03,952 --> 01:16:06,868
Mm-hmm. Woah.
1334
01:16:06,955 --> 01:16:09,175
I'm not alone. We're together.
1335
01:16:09,262 --> 01:16:13,310
You will be.
And I'm a patient man.
1336
01:16:13,397 --> 01:16:14,746
Do you mind if I ask you
a question?
1337
01:16:15,877 --> 01:16:16,965
Go ahead.
1338
01:16:19,446 --> 01:16:21,274
Have you figured it out?
1339
01:16:23,102 --> 01:16:26,192
That this whole game
was set up just for you?
1340
01:16:27,498 --> 01:16:29,935
All that Michael Jackson shit.
1341
01:16:31,067 --> 01:16:33,852
You and your dad
playing video games,
1342
01:16:34,113 --> 01:16:36,333
and your ex
with Ellen DeGeneres.
1343
01:16:42,295 --> 01:16:43,818
So then who are you?
1344
01:16:44,210 --> 01:16:47,996
I think maybe you watched
a few too many westerns, huh?
1345
01:18:22,569 --> 01:18:23,527
Hi.
1346
01:18:24,658 --> 01:18:26,704
- Me again.
- Hi.
1347
01:18:27,008 --> 01:18:29,185
So, you been having fun?
1348
01:18:29,315 --> 01:18:31,274
Did you just ask
if I was having fun?
1349
01:18:31,361 --> 01:18:33,319
Um... yes?
1350
01:18:33,406 --> 01:18:36,235
No! I'm not having fun!
1351
01:18:36,322 --> 01:18:37,193
Okay.
1352
01:18:37,758 --> 01:18:40,500
This has been
a goddamn nightmare,
Andy Samberg.
1353
01:18:40,587 --> 01:18:43,024
Well I'm sorry to hear that.
But truth be told...
1354
01:18:43,895 --> 01:18:46,680
since I last saw you,
things haven't been
that great for me either. So...
1355
01:18:48,378 --> 01:18:51,250
Been on
a little bit of a bender.
1356
01:18:51,337 --> 01:18:53,731
- You've been on a bender?
Lot of ups and downs.
1357
01:18:53,992 --> 01:18:56,864
Currently in a big down.
1358
01:18:58,083 --> 01:19:02,566
In a big down.
Thus, me, back here with you.
1359
01:19:03,001 --> 01:19:05,003
- For a little money gig.
- What do you even want?
1360
01:19:05,090 --> 01:19:06,222
You know what,
you're actually totally right.
1361
01:19:06,309 --> 01:19:07,571
I'm gonna keep this moving
1362
01:19:07,701 --> 01:19:10,138
so I can get paid, you can
be on your way, and I can...
1363
01:19:11,401 --> 01:19:13,098
♪ Take it back
to squeaky street. ♪
1364
01:19:13,185 --> 01:19:15,231
I'm just kidding!
1365
01:19:16,101 --> 01:19:17,320
No more of that.
1366
01:19:17,668 --> 01:19:19,278
Just getting my money so I can
pay everyone back that I owe.
1367
01:19:19,365 --> 01:19:20,801
If you're watching,
I'm just joking around,
1368
01:19:20,888 --> 01:19:22,673
you're gonna get your money.
Here we go.
1369
01:19:24,065 --> 01:19:26,503
Thomas Walcott.
Smelly, no tooth.
1370
01:19:26,590 --> 01:19:28,418
Doesn't really say that,
I was just joking.
1371
01:19:28,505 --> 01:19:31,551
Gotta keep it light.
Congratulations.
You have made it to the limo.
1372
01:19:31,638 --> 01:19:34,728
But the game is not over.
You have a choice.
1373
01:19:34,815 --> 01:19:37,949
Do you want to continue playing,
or end it now,
1374
01:19:38,036 --> 01:19:40,995
and return to your home safely
but receive no money?
1375
01:19:44,956 --> 01:19:46,871
- I'm gonna do it.
- Really?
1376
01:19:46,958 --> 01:19:50,918
Yeah, really.
I've come this far,
I need to finish what I started.
1377
01:19:51,005 --> 01:19:53,312
Why would you--
You know what? Fine.
1378
01:19:53,399 --> 01:19:55,488
I get paid more
if you keep going, so great.
1379
01:19:56,097 --> 01:19:58,012
He wants to keep going.
Let's keep going.
1380
01:19:59,405 --> 01:20:02,278
Jesus fucking Christ.
1381
01:20:04,802 --> 01:20:06,934
Hey uh, would you do me a favor?
Roll your window down.
1382
01:20:07,021 --> 01:20:09,067
You're pretty ripe.
1383
01:20:10,198 --> 01:20:14,290
Thank you.
1384
01:20:24,865 --> 01:20:28,391
Okay. Good luck, man.
1385
01:20:48,976 --> 01:20:50,021
Hey, boo.
1386
01:20:50,717 --> 01:20:53,590
Can I talk to you? I got some
information about Maddy.
1387
01:20:53,677 --> 01:20:56,897
Hey, Tommy, come this way.
Towards me.
1388
01:20:56,984 --> 01:20:59,073
- We're friends with Charlie.
- Sinbad...
1389
01:20:59,160 --> 01:21:00,684
- Come here.
- Fuck.
1390
01:21:00,771 --> 01:21:02,338
Tommy.
1391
01:21:13,740 --> 01:21:15,438
Tommy!
1392
01:21:27,972 --> 01:21:29,930
Holy shit.
1393
01:21:30,278 --> 01:21:33,194
Oh, fuck. Oh, shit.
1394
01:21:41,115 --> 01:21:44,031
I won! I won! I won!
1395
01:21:53,911 --> 01:21:58,698
Where are the fucking guys?
I won!
1396
01:22:03,094 --> 01:22:06,663
It's been 30 days. The limo
picked me up, I made it!
1397
01:22:07,272 --> 01:22:09,361
I told you when
we were sitting here,
1398
01:22:09,492 --> 01:22:11,798
your game was beatable,
and it was.
1399
01:22:11,885 --> 01:22:13,539
And I beat you!
1400
01:22:14,061 --> 01:22:17,413
You tried to break me,
but you failed at that too.
1401
01:22:17,500 --> 01:22:19,980
You actually made me stronger.
1402
01:22:20,067 --> 01:22:22,287
You wanna know why?
'Cause I learned things.
1403
01:22:22,374 --> 01:22:25,682
First of all, I got over my ex.
Check mark.
1404
01:22:26,334 --> 01:22:29,425
Second of all, I saw my Dad.
Thank you.
1405
01:22:29,512 --> 01:22:31,339
Fucking check mark.
1406
01:22:31,818 --> 01:22:35,082
Third of all, I met a new woman
and she's excellent.
1407
01:22:35,169 --> 01:22:36,432
So how's this?
1408
01:22:38,085 --> 01:22:43,787
I know that I won, and you
owe me a million dollars,
1409
01:22:43,874 --> 01:22:47,573
and I'm not leaving
until you bring it to me.
1410
01:22:57,844 --> 01:23:00,499
Just gimme my goddamn money
so I can get on with my life
1411
01:23:00,586 --> 01:23:02,109
for fuck's sake.
1412
01:23:15,340 --> 01:23:19,562
Congratulations.
You survived 30 days.
1413
01:23:19,649 --> 01:23:24,131
- You are our first winner!
- You won our game!
1414
01:23:24,218 --> 01:23:26,786
How does it feel to be a winner?
1415
01:23:28,440 --> 01:23:31,269
Pretty good.
Pretty good.
1416
01:23:31,356 --> 01:23:32,618
Stoked for you, Tommy.
1417
01:23:32,749 --> 01:23:36,013
Thanks, man. You helped
me a lot. All you guys did.
1418
01:23:36,492 --> 01:23:38,537
I mean, not you, Samurai.
1419
01:23:38,624 --> 01:23:41,671
I just met you.
And you remember this guy.
1420
01:23:42,454 --> 01:23:45,413
You beat me, ya prick.
1421
01:23:46,414 --> 01:23:50,027
Even that was scary.
1422
01:23:50,114 --> 01:23:51,028
What is this?
1423
01:23:51,637 --> 01:23:54,684
This is Danish Kroner.
It's the currency of Greenland.
1424
01:23:55,598 --> 01:23:58,252
Thank you. And I'm really glad
you didn't kill me.
1425
01:23:58,339 --> 01:23:59,993
You're very welcome.
1426
01:24:00,080 --> 01:24:01,560
I think I learned
from this game,
1427
01:24:01,647 --> 01:24:04,302
I'm ready to shake things up.
Let's try new things.
1428
01:24:04,389 --> 01:24:05,521
Yeah.
1429
01:24:05,608 --> 01:24:10,438
I fucking won!
I won the game!
1430
01:24:11,701 --> 01:24:14,573
Fuck yeah!
1431
01:24:14,660 --> 01:24:20,274
Wow! What a fucked-up game!
1432
01:24:29,153 --> 01:24:33,461
Was it dangerous? Uh, yeah,
it actually really was.
1433
01:24:34,027 --> 01:24:36,421
Was it worth it? Hmm.
1434
01:24:37,770 --> 01:24:42,253
You bet your ass it was.
'Cause we're talking
a million dollars.
1435
01:24:42,819 --> 01:24:43,863
And I won.
1436
01:24:45,256 --> 01:24:47,954
So I'd like to thank you
guys for fucking nothing,
1437
01:24:48,041 --> 01:24:50,261
because you didn't
believe in me,
1438
01:24:50,391 --> 01:24:52,524
and you were wrong
and I was right.
1439
01:24:52,611 --> 01:24:54,439
And you all have egg
on your face.
1440
01:24:54,526 --> 01:24:56,136
So what do you have
to say for yourselves?
1441
01:24:57,181 --> 01:25:01,098
I'm glad you fixed your tooth,
'cause it really
looked terrible.
1442
01:25:01,185 --> 01:25:04,101
Comedically.
- I preferred it before.
So you won.
1443
01:25:04,623 --> 01:25:08,584
So does that,
does that mean you're,
you're a millionaire now, honey?
1444
01:25:09,193 --> 01:25:13,501
Uh, obviously with this game,
there's always twists and turns
1445
01:25:13,589 --> 01:25:15,068
and it's happened
with the currency.
1446
01:25:15,155 --> 01:25:16,243
What's the twist
with the currency?
1447
01:25:16,330 --> 01:25:17,505
Yeah, how much-
How much did you--
1448
01:25:17,636 --> 01:25:19,638
I wonder what the twist
is with the currency.
1449
01:25:19,725 --> 01:25:21,292
Are you a millionaire or not?
1450
01:25:21,379 --> 01:25:22,423
- Yeah, so.
Of course.
1451
01:25:22,989 --> 01:25:25,035
Yeah, so the way they're doing
the payment on this one is uh,
1452
01:25:25,122 --> 01:25:29,779
it's four grand a month
for, I think it's 250 months.
1453
01:25:30,127 --> 01:25:32,695
And it's in
Greenlandic currency.
So I don't know the conversion.
1454
01:25:32,782 --> 01:25:35,088
That's very interesting.
Greenlandic currency.
1455
01:25:35,175 --> 01:25:37,177
I wonder where that
terrible idea came from.
1456
01:25:37,264 --> 01:25:39,266
Not so bad!
That's, like, 12 years.
1457
01:25:39,397 --> 01:25:41,442
Yeah.
Okay well, that's it.
I'm done.
1458
01:25:41,573 --> 01:25:43,575
Uh, Wayne Brady, big fan.
1459
01:25:43,662 --> 01:25:44,663
- Yeah.
- Aw, thank you.
1460
01:25:45,142 --> 01:25:46,578
Uh, you wanna grab lunch
or something, or are you down?
1461
01:25:46,665 --> 01:25:48,580
- Yeah, yeah, no I'm down.
- Great. Awesome. Yeah, cool.
1462
01:25:48,667 --> 01:25:50,713
Thank you. Alright,
well good to see everybody.
1463
01:25:51,583 --> 01:25:53,933
It's just like a lot,
you know what I mean?
1464
01:25:54,020 --> 01:25:55,761
Hey, thank you.
1465
01:25:55,935 --> 01:25:58,982
So, what are you
gonna tell Maddy if she asks
about the game?
1466
01:25:59,069 --> 01:26:00,636
I'm gonna tell her the truth.
1467
01:26:00,766 --> 01:26:03,813
The game's over.
Time to move on.
1468
01:26:04,988 --> 01:26:08,469
Alright. Here goes nothing.
Now or never.
1469
01:26:08,556 --> 01:26:10,210
Yeah, here goes nothing.
1470
01:26:11,777 --> 01:26:13,213
You want me to come with you?
1471
01:26:13,649 --> 01:26:16,477
No, no. I wanna do it
on my own. But thanks.
1472
01:26:16,564 --> 01:26:18,218
I'll see you back at the
apartment, though, all right?
1473
01:26:18,305 --> 01:26:19,611
Come on, hug it up.
1474
01:26:20,177 --> 01:26:22,309
Thanks. I'll see you back
- at home, okay?
- Yeah, I'll see you at home.
1475
01:26:22,396 --> 01:26:24,050
Alright. You're the best.
1476
01:26:44,592 --> 01:26:47,595
♪ Now what I want is
an easy movement ♪
1477
01:26:48,814 --> 01:26:51,338
♪ So kindly go gently with me ♪
1478
01:27:15,319 --> 01:27:18,670
♪ Now what I want is
freedom of my legs ♪
1479
01:27:18,931 --> 01:27:21,673
♪ So kindly keep back a little ♪
1480
01:27:26,373 --> 01:27:28,941
♪ I don'’t like it when
you'’re holding my hips ♪
1481
01:27:29,028 --> 01:27:31,596
♪ I want you to rock me
like this ♪
1482
01:27:31,683 --> 01:27:34,120
♪ I don'’t like it when you're
touching my breast ♪
1483
01:27:34,207 --> 01:27:36,079
♪ I'd like you to be
at your best ♪
1484
01:27:36,166 --> 01:27:38,603
♪ Oh mister, please go easy ♪
1485
01:27:38,690 --> 01:27:42,868
♪ So mister, I say,
go easy with me ♪
1486
01:27:59,015 --> 01:28:01,626
♪ It is true that
the music is sweet ♪
1487
01:28:01,713 --> 01:28:04,629
♪ But kindly keep me released ♪
1488
01:28:19,035 --> 01:28:21,907
♪ Now what I see is that
you'’re getting too hot ♪
1489
01:28:21,994 --> 01:28:24,083
♪ Sir please,
suppress your feeling ♪
1490
01:28:24,170 --> 01:28:26,651
♪ I say mister,
please suppress your ♪
1491
01:28:26,956 --> 01:28:29,349
♪ So mister, I say,
suppress your ♪
1492
01:28:34,659 --> 01:28:37,227
♪ I don'’t like it when you're
holding my hips ♪
1493
01:28:37,314 --> 01:28:39,882
♪ I want you
to rock me like this ♪
1494
01:28:39,969 --> 01:28:42,275
♪ I don'’t like it when you're
touching my breast ♪
1495
01:28:42,362 --> 01:28:44,190
♪ I'd like you to be
at your best ♪
1496
01:28:44,277 --> 01:28:46,889
♪ Oh mister, please go easy ♪
1497
01:28:46,976 --> 01:28:52,024
♪ So mister, I say, go easy
with me, alright! ♪
1498
01:30:02,007 --> 01:30:03,139
♪ Wake up in the morning
1499
01:30:03,226 --> 01:30:04,967
♪ It's a quarter to three ♪
1500
01:30:05,054 --> 01:30:06,751
♪ I hit the street ♪
1501
01:30:09,493 --> 01:30:10,886
♪ Wake up in the morning
1502
01:30:10,973 --> 01:30:12,365
♪ It's a quarter to three ♪
1503
01:30:12,452 --> 01:30:14,193
♪ I hit the street ♪
1504
01:30:16,587 --> 01:30:18,806
♪ Now that my mind is racing
1505
01:30:18,894 --> 01:30:20,330
♪ And rolling around ♪
1506
01:30:20,417 --> 01:30:22,854
♪ I can't sleep anymore ♪
1507
01:30:24,464 --> 01:30:26,553
♪ Now that my mind is racing
1508
01:30:26,640 --> 01:30:28,033
♪ And rolling around ♪
1509
01:30:28,120 --> 01:30:30,688
♪ I can't sleep anymore ♪
116690
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