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1
00:00:09,010 --> 00:00:12,013
I'm goin' down to South Park,
gonna have myself a time.
2
00:00:12,138 --> 00:00:13,889
Friendly faces everywhere.
3
00:00:14,015 --> 00:00:15,683
Humble folks
without temptation.
4
00:00:15,808 --> 00:00:18,602
Goin' down to South Park,
gonna leave my woes behind.
5
00:00:18,728 --> 00:00:20,688
Ample parking day or night.
6
00:00:20,813 --> 00:00:22,173
People spouting,
"Howdy, neighbor!"
7
00:00:22,231 --> 00:00:25,401
Heading on up to South Park,
gonna see if I can't unwind.
8
00:00:25,526 --> 00:00:27,194
Timmy, Timmy, Timmy, Timmy.
9
00:00:27,319 --> 00:00:28,571
Timmy, Timmy,
liv-a-la, Timmy!
10
00:00:28,696 --> 00:00:32,491
Come on down to South Park
and meet some friends of mine.
11
00:00:33,617 --> 00:00:36,203
And in other news, another
school shooting has taken place,
12
00:00:36,328 --> 00:00:37,538
this time in Idaho.
13
00:00:37,663 --> 00:00:39,016
As these kinds of shootings
increase,
14
00:00:39,040 --> 00:00:40,249
one thing becomes clear...
15
00:00:40,374 --> 00:00:42,376
Your children are not safe
at school!
16
00:00:42,501 --> 00:00:44,295
Oh, God!
Change it, change it!
17
00:00:44,420 --> 00:00:46,505
This was the second time
a terrorist threat
18
00:00:46,630 --> 00:00:49,175
has been made on a theme park,
leaving everyone to realize
19
00:00:49,300 --> 00:00:51,343
that children are not safe
outside!
20
00:00:51,469 --> 00:00:52,803
Oh, God!
Change it!
21
00:00:52,928 --> 00:00:55,681
And it seems there is
a new danger to look out for...
22
00:00:55,806 --> 00:00:57,767
Children who are taken
by strangers.
23
00:00:57,892 --> 00:01:01,228
The bottom line... children are
not safe in their own homes!
24
00:01:02,229 --> 00:01:04,106
Tweek, come to the kitchen,
sweetie.
25
00:01:04,231 --> 00:01:06,275
We need to see you real quick.
26
00:01:07,026 --> 00:01:09,278
Oh, God!
They're gonna get me.
27
00:01:09,403 --> 00:01:10,946
Sit down and have some coffee,
son.
28
00:01:13,365 --> 00:01:15,725
Tweek, there are starting to be
a lot of reports on the news
29
00:01:15,785 --> 00:01:18,370
about children being abducted,
and we thought we should talk.
30
00:01:18,496 --> 00:01:19,872
I-I saw!
31
00:01:19,997 --> 00:01:22,374
You know never to talk
to strangers, right, Tweek?
32
00:01:22,500 --> 00:01:23,626
You can't trust anybody.
33
00:01:23,751 --> 00:01:25,002
Oh, God!
34
00:01:25,127 --> 00:01:26,629
Now, we don't want to alarm you,
son,
35
00:01:26,754 --> 00:01:29,757
but we've installed new locks on
your bedroom windows and door.
36
00:01:29,882 --> 00:01:32,551
It's important for you to know
never to unlock them at night
37
00:01:32,676 --> 00:01:34,678
for anyone except your mother
and I.
38
00:01:34,804 --> 00:01:35,888
Oh, Jesus!
Aah!
39
00:01:36,013 --> 00:01:37,306
It's just a precaution, sweetie.
40
00:01:37,431 --> 00:01:39,266
Probably nothing
will ever happen.
41
00:01:41,352 --> 00:01:43,062
No. No!
42
00:01:43,187 --> 00:01:45,022
They're gonna get me.
43
00:01:45,147 --> 00:01:48,359
Oh... Oh, God.
Just a dream.
44
00:01:51,278 --> 00:01:52,613
Oh, my God!
45
00:01:56,742 --> 00:01:58,828
Tweek, this is Officer Daniels!
46
00:01:58,953 --> 00:01:59,995
Now, try and stay calm,
47
00:02:00,121 --> 00:02:03,499
but we believe an abductor
is in your room!
48
00:02:03,624 --> 00:02:05,251
Inside my room?!
Oh, God!
49
00:02:05,376 --> 00:02:07,211
Give it up, buddy!
We've got you surrounded!
50
00:02:07,336 --> 00:02:09,547
Okay, Tweek, I want you
to very calmly, but quickly,
51
00:02:09,672 --> 00:02:12,216
walk to the door
and come out to us.
52
00:02:12,341 --> 00:02:13,843
Oh, my God!
53
00:02:15,052 --> 00:02:17,513
Jesus, see me through this.
54
00:02:20,599 --> 00:02:22,810
Bang.
You're dead, Tweek.
55
00:02:22,935 --> 00:02:23,769
What?!
56
00:02:23,894 --> 00:02:24,979
You failed the test, son.
57
00:02:25,104 --> 00:02:27,189
Didn't I tell you not to open
the door for anybody
58
00:02:27,314 --> 00:02:28,399
except your mother and I?
59
00:02:28,524 --> 00:02:30,192
Oh, God!
Oh, Jesus!
60
00:02:30,317 --> 00:02:31,711
What if that had been
a child abductor
61
00:02:31,735 --> 00:02:33,612
pretending to be
a police officer, Tweek?
62
00:02:33,737 --> 00:02:35,674
He would have sprayed your
brains all over the floor
63
00:02:35,698 --> 00:02:37,338
and then taken your body
off to the woods.
64
00:02:39,285 --> 00:02:41,287
You've got to be on your toes,
Tweek.
65
00:02:41,412 --> 00:02:43,330
All right.
Now go to bed and get some rest.
66
00:02:43,455 --> 00:02:44,456
Night, pumpkin.
67
00:02:49,461 --> 00:02:51,046
I hope this movie
doesn't suck ass.
68
00:02:51,172 --> 00:02:52,298
It will.
69
00:02:52,423 --> 00:02:53,883
One, please.
70
00:02:54,008 --> 00:02:56,010
Wait! That's not the usual
ticket-taker guy!
71
00:02:56,135 --> 00:02:57,678
- So?
- So I don't know him!
72
00:02:57,803 --> 00:02:59,096
- Dude, relax.
- You relax!
73
00:02:59,221 --> 00:03:00,931
What if he wants to kill me?
74
00:03:01,056 --> 00:03:02,975
God. What the hell
do his parents do to him?
75
00:03:04,810 --> 00:03:07,104
Excuse me. Is this
the right road to Breckenridge?
76
00:03:08,480 --> 00:03:10,900
Please. I just need to know
if this is South Park.
77
00:03:11,025 --> 00:03:12,568
Get away from me!
78
00:03:16,447 --> 00:03:18,616
Could you help me
across the street?
79
00:03:18,741 --> 00:03:21,202
I don't know you!
80
00:03:22,494 --> 00:03:24,496
Oh, hey, kid!
81
00:03:24,622 --> 00:03:26,540
Oh, thank God you happened by!
82
00:03:26,665 --> 00:03:28,918
My chair ran out of juice
right on these train tracks!
83
00:03:29,043 --> 00:03:30,252
If you hadn't shown up...
84
00:03:30,377 --> 00:03:31,921
Oh, anyway,
could you give me a push?
85
00:03:33,339 --> 00:03:34,673
No. No.
You don't understand.
86
00:03:34,798 --> 00:03:36,358
I'm... I'm paralyzed
from the neck down.
87
00:03:36,425 --> 00:03:38,585
I push the chair with this
device in front of my mouth,
88
00:03:38,677 --> 00:03:40,030
but it's not working,
so you see...
89
00:03:40,054 --> 00:03:41,347
I'm not supposed to talk to you!
90
00:03:41,472 --> 00:03:43,015
Please.
This... This isn't funny, kid.
91
00:03:43,140 --> 00:03:45,060
- You have to help me!
- But it could be a trick!
92
00:03:48,479 --> 00:03:50,898
That's a pretty good trick.
93
00:04:01,116 --> 00:04:04,078
Relax, Tweek.
I am not here to hurt you.
94
00:04:04,203 --> 00:04:06,580
I am the ghost
of human kindness.
95
00:04:06,705 --> 00:04:08,707
The ghost of human kindness?
96
00:04:08,832 --> 00:04:11,543
You have never seen
the likes of me before.
97
00:04:11,669 --> 00:04:12,378
What do you want?
98
00:04:12,503 --> 00:04:14,630
You have lost faith
in humanity, lad,
99
00:04:14,755 --> 00:04:16,799
something I cannot bear
to see happen.
100
00:04:16,924 --> 00:04:18,425
Uh, how can I help it?
101
00:04:18,550 --> 00:04:20,970
It seems like everywhere I turn,
someone is out to get me!
102
00:04:21,095 --> 00:04:23,264
That is the world
that the news reports.
103
00:04:23,389 --> 00:04:26,308
It is the world that adults
preoccupy themselves with.
104
00:04:26,433 --> 00:04:28,477
But it is not the world
as it is.
105
00:04:28,602 --> 00:04:29,770
It isn't?
106
00:04:29,895 --> 00:04:31,939
Look here, Tweek.
107
00:04:32,064 --> 00:04:34,942
This woman is on her way
to the retirement home.
108
00:04:35,067 --> 00:04:36,067
She doesn't get paid.
109
00:04:36,110 --> 00:04:39,863
She volunteers her time to talk
with lonely elderly people
110
00:04:39,989 --> 00:04:42,616
who want nothing more
than a friend.
111
00:04:42,741 --> 00:04:44,827
But do you hear about her
on the news?
112
00:04:44,952 --> 00:04:46,203
No.
113
00:04:46,328 --> 00:04:48,956
Now gaze upon this humble house,
Tweek.
114
00:04:49,081 --> 00:04:52,293
Inside, there are two people
who have adopted needy children.
115
00:04:52,418 --> 00:04:55,045
They were strangers
to those kids once.
116
00:04:55,170 --> 00:04:57,589
Now they are loving parents.
117
00:04:59,383 --> 00:05:00,926
Now look here, boy.
118
00:05:01,051 --> 00:05:03,512
A car has broken down
with a flat tire,
119
00:05:03,637 --> 00:05:06,181
and two complete strangers
have stopped to help.
120
00:05:06,307 --> 00:05:09,226
Will their kindness be reported
on the news tomorrow?
121
00:05:09,351 --> 00:05:11,312
I think not.
122
00:05:12,438 --> 00:05:14,982
Are you starting to understand,
boy?
123
00:05:15,107 --> 00:05:16,233
I think so.
124
00:05:16,358 --> 00:05:18,694
You mean that even though
all the news is about murderers
125
00:05:18,819 --> 00:05:20,195
and abductors,
those kind of people
126
00:05:20,321 --> 00:05:22,323
only make up a very small part
of the world.
127
00:05:22,448 --> 00:05:23,699
That's right, lad.
128
00:05:23,824 --> 00:05:26,618
So do you think you can learn
to trust people now?
129
00:05:26,744 --> 00:05:28,037
I'll try.
130
00:05:28,162 --> 00:05:28,954
Good.
131
00:05:29,079 --> 00:05:31,165
Then why don't you get
into the back of my van,
132
00:05:31,290 --> 00:05:32,833
and I'll drive you home?
133
00:05:35,461 --> 00:05:36,503
Your van?
134
00:05:39,465 --> 00:05:41,175
All right, Johnson!
Give it up!
135
00:05:41,300 --> 00:05:43,886
Damn, damn, damn, damn!
136
00:05:44,011 --> 00:05:45,679
Oh, I was so close!
137
00:05:45,804 --> 00:05:47,014
What the hell is going on?
138
00:05:47,139 --> 00:05:48,515
Tweek!
Tweek, are you okay?
139
00:05:48,640 --> 00:05:50,059
- Did he hurt you, son?
- No!
140
00:05:50,184 --> 00:05:52,394
Then we aren't too late.
His name is Frederick Johnson.
141
00:05:52,519 --> 00:05:54,271
He's been abducting children
by dressing up
142
00:05:54,396 --> 00:05:56,607
like the ghost of human kindness
for over a year now.
143
00:05:56,732 --> 00:05:58,609
And I would have gotten away
with it again
144
00:05:58,734 --> 00:06:00,736
if it weren't for you
meddling policemen!
145
00:06:00,861 --> 00:06:02,071
What's going on?
146
00:06:02,196 --> 00:06:04,740
A stranger was caught trying to
abduct the Tweek boy!
147
00:06:04,865 --> 00:06:06,450
An abductor in our town?
148
00:06:06,575 --> 00:06:08,702
Oh, my God.
What are we gonna do?
149
00:06:08,827 --> 00:06:10,454
Rabble! Rabble!
Rabble! Rabble! Rabble!
150
00:06:10,579 --> 00:06:12,915
People, people, calm down.
151
00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:14,184
Well, what are we gonna do,
Mayor?
152
00:06:14,208 --> 00:06:15,501
We have to stop these abductors
153
00:06:15,626 --> 00:06:17,336
from being able to get
into our town!
154
00:06:17,461 --> 00:06:19,588
Rabble! Rabble!
Rabble! Rabble! Rabble!
155
00:06:19,713 --> 00:06:21,256
Yes, but standing out here
yelling,
156
00:06:21,382 --> 00:06:24,593
"Rabble, rabble, rabble"
isn't going to help anything.
157
00:06:24,718 --> 00:06:27,012
But we don't know
what else to do, Mayor!
158
00:06:27,137 --> 00:06:28,889
Rabble! Rabble!
Rabble! Rabble! Rabble!
159
00:06:29,014 --> 00:06:31,517
Rabble! Rabble! Rabble! Rabble!
Rabble! Rabble! Rabble!
160
00:06:31,642 --> 00:06:34,478
People, what do you think
we need to do?
161
00:06:35,813 --> 00:06:39,149
Uh... well, we need to find a way
162
00:06:39,274 --> 00:06:41,652
to close our town off
from unwanted strangers!
163
00:06:41,777 --> 00:06:44,113
Yes. We need a barrier
to protect our kids!
164
00:06:44,238 --> 00:06:45,823
Rabble! Rabble!
Rabble! Rabble! Rabble!
165
00:06:45,948 --> 00:06:47,658
Wait.
That's it... a wall.
166
00:06:47,783 --> 00:06:50,786
We could build a huge city wall
all around South Park
167
00:06:50,911 --> 00:06:53,038
so that we have complete control
over who comes in.
168
00:06:53,163 --> 00:06:55,707
That's not a bad idea...
A city wall.
169
00:06:55,833 --> 00:06:57,918
But who can we get to build it?
170
00:06:59,753 --> 00:07:02,047
And so we want you to design
and build
171
00:07:02,172 --> 00:07:04,716
a great wall
all around the city.
172
00:07:05,509 --> 00:07:07,052
I don't build wall!
173
00:07:07,177 --> 00:07:09,054
I just own and operate
Chitty Wok!
174
00:07:09,179 --> 00:07:11,299
We just think you're the best
person to put up a wall.
175
00:07:11,390 --> 00:07:12,975
We're sure you've got it
in your blood.
176
00:07:13,559 --> 00:07:15,310
Oh, I get it.
177
00:07:15,436 --> 00:07:18,188
Just because I Chinese,
you think I build a wall!
178
00:07:18,313 --> 00:07:19,565
That is bullshit!
179
00:07:19,690 --> 00:07:21,316
I'm not a stereotype, okay?
180
00:07:21,442 --> 00:07:24,570
Just because I Chinese doesn't
mean I go around building wall!
181
00:07:24,695 --> 00:07:26,780
I'm just a normal person
like all of you.
182
00:07:26,905 --> 00:07:30,284
I eat rice and drive really slow
just like the rest of you!
183
00:07:30,409 --> 00:07:31,994
I'm not a stereotype!
184
00:07:32,119 --> 00:07:33,704
Please, Mr. Tuong Lu Kim.
185
00:07:33,829 --> 00:07:35,372
Your ancestors put up
a great wall
186
00:07:35,497 --> 00:07:37,791
that kept Mongolians out
for thousands of years.
187
00:07:37,916 --> 00:07:40,127
We know you can do it for us.
188
00:07:54,850 --> 00:07:57,728
Hey.
Hey, hey!
189
00:07:57,853 --> 00:07:59,563
Hey, what the hell you doing?
190
00:07:59,688 --> 00:08:02,065
Mongolian?
191
00:08:02,191 --> 00:08:04,735
What the hell Mongolian doing
here?
192
00:08:05,861 --> 00:08:09,323
Hey, fuck you, Mongolian!
Don't you break down my wall!
193
00:08:10,407 --> 00:08:12,951
Get out of here!
Fucking Mongolian!
194
00:08:17,539 --> 00:08:18,707
God damn it.
195
00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:20,667
How come every time
us Chinese put up a wall,
196
00:08:20,792 --> 00:08:24,046
stupid Mongolians have to come
and knock it down?
197
00:08:27,549 --> 00:08:30,135
Stan, our abduction problems
are over.
198
00:08:30,260 --> 00:08:31,637
We got the new child tracker.
199
00:08:31,762 --> 00:08:32,638
Child tracker?
200
00:08:32,763 --> 00:08:34,056
It's a little electrical device
201
00:08:34,181 --> 00:08:36,308
that can tell us where you are
anywhere on Earth.
202
00:08:36,433 --> 00:08:38,193
If anybody takes you,
we'll be able to locate
203
00:08:38,310 --> 00:08:40,562
your exact location
within two meters.
204
00:08:42,231 --> 00:08:44,358
There.
I think that's got it.
205
00:08:45,859 --> 00:08:48,028
Dude, no way.
I'm not wearing child tracker.
206
00:08:48,153 --> 00:08:49,947
You can barely even tell
you have one on.
207
00:08:50,072 --> 00:08:51,392
I'm not going to school
like this!
208
00:08:51,490 --> 00:08:53,992
- What will the other guys say?
- I wouldn't worry about that.
209
00:08:56,662 --> 00:08:57,996
So weak.
210
00:08:58,121 --> 00:09:01,083
So weak, dude.
Man.
211
00:09:01,208 --> 00:09:02,936
Why did you have to go
and be abducted, Tweek?
212
00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:04,270
Now all our parents
are freaking out.
213
00:09:04,294 --> 00:09:05,337
I didn't mean to!
214
00:09:08,840 --> 00:09:11,343
Okay.
Finally.
215
00:09:13,303 --> 00:09:14,303
Oh, no.
216
00:09:18,225 --> 00:09:21,228
It's those goddamn Mongolian
again!
217
00:09:21,353 --> 00:09:23,897
Stop!
Stop right there, Mongolian!
218
00:09:24,022 --> 00:09:26,233
God damn it!
Stop!
219
00:09:26,358 --> 00:09:31,863
Stop breaking down my chitty
wall, you stupid Mongolian!
220
00:09:33,282 --> 00:09:35,742
All right, you sons of bitches!
You...
221
00:09:35,867 --> 00:09:38,036
What the hell?
222
00:09:40,247 --> 00:09:42,916
Oh, shit!
223
00:09:45,043 --> 00:09:48,463
Goddamn Mongolian!
224
00:09:48,589 --> 00:09:52,175
I gonna get you!
Fucking Mongolian!
225
00:09:52,301 --> 00:09:55,429
Stop breaking my chitty wall!
226
00:09:55,554 --> 00:09:58,015
Oh, God damn it!
227
00:10:00,767 --> 00:10:04,313
That's the last time you gonna
break down my chitty wall!
228
00:10:04,438 --> 00:10:07,232
You hear me, Mongolian?!
229
00:10:07,357 --> 00:10:10,068
Goddamn Mongolians.
230
00:10:12,321 --> 00:10:13,905
All right, Cows.
231
00:10:14,031 --> 00:10:16,175
We're gonna go out there
and we're gonna give 'em hell!
232
00:10:16,199 --> 00:10:18,285
But wait.
Where's the other team?
233
00:10:18,910 --> 00:10:20,829
There is no other team.
234
00:10:20,954 --> 00:10:23,290
Well, we put a wall around
the city to keep outsiders out.
235
00:10:23,415 --> 00:10:24,934
You don't think we want
a bunch of strangers
236
00:10:24,958 --> 00:10:26,311
coming in and playing ball,
do you?
237
00:10:26,335 --> 00:10:28,313
But if there's no other team,
that won't be any fun.
238
00:10:28,337 --> 00:10:30,213
Don't worry.
It'll still be fun for us.
239
00:10:35,135 --> 00:10:36,720
Go, Cows! Go, Cows!
240
00:10:36,845 --> 00:10:38,597
Go, Cows!
Go, Cows!
241
00:10:38,722 --> 00:10:40,015
Play ball!
242
00:10:43,477 --> 00:10:45,729
Steeeee-rike!
243
00:10:51,526 --> 00:10:53,695
South Park Cows do it again!
244
00:10:53,820 --> 00:10:56,198
Congratulations on your victory,
boys.
245
00:10:56,323 --> 00:10:57,991
Dude, we weren't playing
anybody!
246
00:10:58,116 --> 00:11:00,452
Yeah, and you kicked ass!
247
00:11:00,577 --> 00:11:02,871
Isn't it awesome having
a great wall around our city?
248
00:11:02,996 --> 00:11:05,207
Nobody in town
except for our good friends!
249
00:11:05,332 --> 00:11:07,542
Great wall! Great wall!
250
00:11:07,668 --> 00:11:09,127
Hey, shh!
Quiet, everybody!
251
00:11:09,252 --> 00:11:12,130
And this newest study reveals
more about child abductions
252
00:11:12,255 --> 00:11:13,924
than we apparently knew before,
Tom.
253
00:11:14,049 --> 00:11:15,842
- Turn it up.
- That's right, Chris.
254
00:11:15,967 --> 00:11:18,595
This newest study shows that
the majority of child abductions
255
00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:20,305
are not committed by strangers,
256
00:11:20,430 --> 00:11:23,558
but by somebody the child knows
in their own town!
257
00:11:23,684 --> 00:11:25,602
The report further states
258
00:11:25,727 --> 00:11:28,146
that it is because the child
trusts the individual
259
00:11:28,271 --> 00:11:29,791
that problems occur
in the first place.
260
00:11:29,898 --> 00:11:31,233
Well, I guess this means
261
00:11:31,358 --> 00:11:33,235
the enemy is in our own
backyard, so to speak.
262
00:11:33,360 --> 00:11:34,069
Sure does, Tom.
263
00:11:34,194 --> 00:11:36,381
All right. Thanks, Chris.
Is the weather going to turn...
264
00:11:36,405 --> 00:11:39,866
Well, if you'll excuse us,
I think we'll be going now.
265
00:11:39,991 --> 00:11:41,326
Yeah.
Come along, Kyle.
266
00:11:41,451 --> 00:11:43,495
Stanley, time for us
to get back to the house.
267
00:11:43,620 --> 00:11:46,081
- I'm not done with my pizza.
- Now, Stanley!
268
00:11:49,209 --> 00:11:51,503
There we go.
All finished.
269
00:11:51,628 --> 00:11:54,464
My Mongolian
missile-defense system.
270
00:11:54,589 --> 00:11:57,259
Those Mongolians try to break
down my chitty wall again,
271
00:11:57,384 --> 00:12:00,262
they gonna get a big,
heat-seeking missile surprise!
272
00:12:03,598 --> 00:12:06,810
Hello, Mongolian! Yeah.
273
00:12:06,935 --> 00:12:09,271
You come to break down
my chitty wall?
274
00:12:11,273 --> 00:12:13,817
Oh, you gonna throw
that baseball at my wall?
275
00:12:13,942 --> 00:12:17,320
Oh, no. Not a baseball.
I'm pretty scared.
276
00:12:17,446 --> 00:12:18,780
Well, you know what?
277
00:12:18,905 --> 00:12:20,031
I might have something here
278
00:12:20,157 --> 00:12:23,034
that's a little bigger
than a baseball!
279
00:12:23,160 --> 00:12:26,496
Say hello to my little friend!
280
00:12:36,381 --> 00:12:38,049
Oh, crap.
281
00:12:47,392 --> 00:12:50,353
Goddamn Mongolian!
282
00:12:50,479 --> 00:12:54,191
You break down my chitty wall
last time!
283
00:12:57,527 --> 00:12:59,821
Dude, this is worse
than child tracker.
284
00:12:59,946 --> 00:13:02,157
It's okay, boys.
Just act as if we weren't here.
285
00:13:02,282 --> 00:13:04,576
Right.
Do what you normally would do.
286
00:13:05,702 --> 00:13:07,579
You're such a fat-ass, Cartman.
287
00:13:07,704 --> 00:13:08,955
At least I'm not a stupid Jew.
288
00:13:09,080 --> 00:13:10,081
Wha-Wha-What?!
289
00:13:11,708 --> 00:13:12,542
M'kay, kids.
290
00:13:12,667 --> 00:13:14,085
So now who can tell me
291
00:13:14,211 --> 00:13:17,088
what year the first moon landing
took place?
292
00:13:17,214 --> 00:13:18,465
Uh, how about you, Clyde?
293
00:13:19,925 --> 00:13:21,468
No helping.
294
00:13:21,593 --> 00:13:24,262
M'kay, I'm not really sure
having all the parents here
295
00:13:24,387 --> 00:13:26,097
is a good idea, m'kay?
296
00:13:26,223 --> 00:13:27,492
Well, maybe things
would be better
297
00:13:27,516 --> 00:13:29,601
if we could trust people
like the Stotches!
298
00:13:29,726 --> 00:13:32,145
Us? Your family has always been
the shifty-eyed ones!
299
00:13:32,270 --> 00:13:33,480
Oh, yeah?!
300
00:13:34,940 --> 00:13:37,818
Oh, this is too much to take.
301
00:13:37,943 --> 00:13:40,654
Mom, Dad, could you
please leave me alone?
302
00:13:40,779 --> 00:13:43,990
We just want to make sure
nobody hurts you, junior, m'kay?
303
00:13:44,115 --> 00:13:45,909
M'kay.
304
00:13:48,745 --> 00:13:50,831
My master plan!
305
00:13:50,956 --> 00:13:52,916
When those Mongolians come
next time,
306
00:13:53,041 --> 00:13:55,043
I pour this sweet-and-sour pork
on their heads.
307
00:13:55,168 --> 00:13:57,212
Sweet-and-sour pork
so hot and sticky,
308
00:13:57,337 --> 00:14:01,007
Mongolians will stick right
to the wall and scream, "Ooh!"
309
00:14:01,132 --> 00:14:03,176
I can't wait.
310
00:14:10,684 --> 00:14:12,269
Oh, I get it.
311
00:14:12,394 --> 00:14:14,646
A Trojan Mongolian horse.
312
00:14:14,771 --> 00:14:16,481
Mongolians are hiding inside
313
00:14:16,606 --> 00:14:18,446
thinking that I'll bring it
in the chitty wall.
314
00:14:18,567 --> 00:14:21,361
Then Mongolians pop out
and destroy wall from inside out
315
00:14:21,486 --> 00:14:23,655
without getting sweet-and-sour
pork on their head!
316
00:14:23,780 --> 00:14:25,991
Okay.
I'll play along.
317
00:14:26,116 --> 00:14:28,243
Oh!
Oh, look!
318
00:14:28,368 --> 00:14:31,371
Look. My very own
Mongolian Trojan horse.
319
00:14:31,496 --> 00:14:32,831
Gee, what a surprise.
320
00:14:32,956 --> 00:14:36,293
I guess Mongolians aren't such
crappy, smelly people after all.
321
00:14:36,418 --> 00:14:37,418
Yeah.
322
00:14:37,836 --> 00:14:39,880
Great.
323
00:14:40,005 --> 00:14:41,923
Yeah, what a great present.
324
00:14:42,048 --> 00:14:44,259
I just gonna push it
inside the gate
325
00:14:44,384 --> 00:14:46,928
and show it to all my friends.
326
00:14:49,639 --> 00:14:51,892
It's sweet-and-sour pork!
327
00:14:57,188 --> 00:14:59,900
I'm gonna get you Mongolians
328
00:15:00,025 --> 00:15:03,820
if it's the last thing I do!
329
00:15:06,615 --> 00:15:08,658
And so all the residents
of Manhattan
330
00:15:08,783 --> 00:15:10,243
are prepared to evacuate
331
00:15:10,368 --> 00:15:12,704
if Ms. Clinton's ass
gets any bigger.
332
00:15:12,829 --> 00:15:13,829
And in other news,
333
00:15:13,914 --> 00:15:16,291
new findings on the increase
in child abductions.
334
00:15:16,416 --> 00:15:17,959
Oh, Jesus.
Turn it up, honey.
335
00:15:18,084 --> 00:15:20,921
The study shows that the most
likely abductors of children
336
00:15:21,046 --> 00:15:23,089
are the parents themselves!
337
00:15:23,673 --> 00:15:26,635
The study reveals that 9
out of every 10 abduction cases
338
00:15:26,760 --> 00:15:29,179
are committed by the child's
mother or father.
339
00:15:29,304 --> 00:15:31,681
The bottom line being that
your children aren't safe...
340
00:15:31,806 --> 00:15:33,224
Even from you!
341
00:15:35,810 --> 00:15:36,811
Where are you going?
342
00:15:36,937 --> 00:15:38,104
I'm just going to go upstairs
343
00:15:38,229 --> 00:15:39,898
and see if Tweek
is still in his bed.
344
00:15:40,023 --> 00:15:41,942
I think I'll go with you.
345
00:15:42,067 --> 00:15:43,360
It's okay.
I can do it.
346
00:15:43,485 --> 00:15:44,837
I just want to make sure that
you...
347
00:15:44,861 --> 00:15:45,737
That I don't abduct him?
348
00:15:45,862 --> 00:15:47,702
How do I know that you
haven't done it already?
349
00:15:47,781 --> 00:15:49,199
Me?!
I would never abduct our son!
350
00:15:49,324 --> 00:15:51,952
That's not what
the new study says!
351
00:15:52,077 --> 00:15:53,578
But what are we supposed to do?
352
00:15:53,703 --> 00:15:55,956
How can we protect Tweek
from ourselves?
353
00:16:00,293 --> 00:16:01,336
Here you go, Stanley.
354
00:16:01,461 --> 00:16:03,463
This should hold you over
for three years.
355
00:16:03,588 --> 00:16:05,048
But why do I have to leave?
356
00:16:05,173 --> 00:16:07,968
The news says that at your age
you aren't safe with us, son.
357
00:16:08,093 --> 00:16:10,136
You have to get out of here
before we abduct you.
358
00:16:10,261 --> 00:16:12,430
Goodbye, son.
Remember to eat right.
359
00:16:12,555 --> 00:16:15,016
Look out for your brother, Kyle.
You're the man now.
360
00:16:15,141 --> 00:16:18,019
Oh, boys, don't ever forget
that we love you!
361
00:16:23,858 --> 00:16:26,236
Be careful out there!
362
00:16:28,029 --> 00:16:29,656
Where are we supposed to go?
363
00:16:29,781 --> 00:16:32,784
We can't tell you because
we can't know where you are!
364
00:16:32,909 --> 00:16:35,161
Oh, this is terrible!
365
00:16:35,286 --> 00:16:37,163
Go on, kids!
Go!
366
00:16:37,288 --> 00:16:39,040
Go and don't look back!
367
00:16:44,963 --> 00:16:47,882
Goodbye, kids.
We'll never forget you.
368
00:16:56,182 --> 00:16:59,602
Dude, sometimes I think
our parents are really stupid.
369
00:17:07,444 --> 00:17:09,904
Hey, dog.
370
00:17:10,030 --> 00:17:12,490
Over here.
Over here, dog.
371
00:17:12,615 --> 00:17:15,118
Got some sweet-and-sour for you.
372
00:17:15,243 --> 00:17:16,286
Good dog!
373
00:17:16,411 --> 00:17:18,288
That's it!
Keep licking, dog!
374
00:17:21,750 --> 00:17:23,585
I'm free, Mongolians!
375
00:17:23,710 --> 00:17:26,296
And now I'm going to
make you pay!
376
00:17:27,881 --> 00:17:29,340
Finally, some good news tonight.
377
00:17:29,466 --> 00:17:30,633
It's been several days
378
00:17:30,759 --> 00:17:32,719
since any child abductions
have taken place.
379
00:17:32,844 --> 00:17:35,597
The main reason... parents don't
know where their children are.
380
00:17:37,182 --> 00:17:38,349
What's the matter?
381
00:17:38,475 --> 00:17:41,770
Oh, it's just...
I was wondering if Stan's okay.
382
00:17:41,895 --> 00:17:44,397
Oh, I'm sure he's made it
somewhere safe by now.
383
00:17:44,522 --> 00:17:46,649
Do you really think we did
the right thing, Randy,
384
00:17:46,775 --> 00:17:49,194
sending all the young kids in
town off to live on their own?
385
00:17:49,319 --> 00:17:51,946
- Sweetheart, you saw the news.
- I know.
386
00:17:52,072 --> 00:17:52,947
Don't you worry.
387
00:17:53,073 --> 00:17:54,673
I'm sure that Stan
and all the other kids
388
00:17:54,783 --> 00:17:57,577
are somewhere safe,
off in a whole new city by now,
389
00:17:57,702 --> 00:17:59,913
making a new life
for themselves.
390
00:18:00,038 --> 00:18:03,249
Tah tane da ke ab
kahleh kalabush.
391
00:18:03,374 --> 00:18:05,418
Bi ologad bag, big nan dastai.
392
00:18:07,253 --> 00:18:08,253
De bandig baeakhalah?
393
00:18:08,338 --> 00:18:09,798
Tawya mea pleda cleah bleah.
394
00:18:09,923 --> 00:18:11,466
Triben fak burushban.
395
00:18:11,591 --> 00:18:13,426
Shain balag!
396
00:18:19,724 --> 00:18:21,392
All right, Mongolians!
397
00:18:21,518 --> 00:18:24,104
Your only way through this wall
is through me!
398
00:18:24,229 --> 00:18:26,106
This is my last stand!
399
00:18:26,231 --> 00:18:28,608
I'm gonna do my war dance now.
400
00:18:35,698 --> 00:18:38,451
Does my war dance scare you,
Mongolians?
401
00:18:38,576 --> 00:18:40,912
Yeah, you think you want
a piece of this?
402
00:18:51,631 --> 00:18:54,676
This is the ancient
Chinese dance of...
403
00:18:54,801 --> 00:18:56,136
Oh, hello, kids.
404
00:18:56,261 --> 00:18:58,471
Be careful.
There's Mongolians up there.
405
00:19:10,859 --> 00:19:12,402
Oh, crap.
406
00:19:18,158 --> 00:19:20,827
- What's going on?
- I heard an explosion!
407
00:19:20,952 --> 00:19:23,621
Goddamn Mongolians attack
chitty wall again!
408
00:19:25,165 --> 00:19:26,165
Mongolians?
409
00:19:26,249 --> 00:19:27,834
What the hell
are they doing here?
410
00:19:27,959 --> 00:19:28,959
Rabble!
Rabble, rabble!
411
00:19:29,002 --> 00:19:30,522
Rabble! Rabble!
Rabble! Rabble! Rabble!
412
00:19:30,628 --> 00:19:31,629
Wait a minute.
413
00:19:31,754 --> 00:19:35,425
Those Mongolians are...
our children.
414
00:19:35,550 --> 00:19:37,302
Ike?!
Kyle?!
415
00:19:37,427 --> 00:19:39,846
My son has become a Mongolian?
416
00:19:39,971 --> 00:19:41,973
No!
No!
417
00:19:42,098 --> 00:19:44,350
Oh, God.
What have we done?
418
00:19:44,475 --> 00:19:45,768
We sent our children away,
419
00:19:45,894 --> 00:19:47,854
and now they don't even remember
who they are.
420
00:19:47,979 --> 00:19:50,064
Kids, don't you remember us?
421
00:19:50,190 --> 00:19:52,483
Wait, wait. I learned
some Mongolian in college.
422
00:19:52,609 --> 00:19:53,860
Uh, let's see.
423
00:19:53,985 --> 00:19:57,906
Uh, kids, uh... bi kute.
424
00:19:58,031 --> 00:20:01,201
Bi sonik kute.
425
00:20:01,326 --> 00:20:02,202
Tod kasbara...
426
00:20:02,327 --> 00:20:05,288
Oh, my God.
Our parents are so stupid, dude.
427
00:20:05,413 --> 00:20:07,415
Bi kute.
428
00:20:07,540 --> 00:20:09,500
We are your parents.
429
00:20:09,626 --> 00:20:11,961
You used to live here with us.
430
00:20:12,086 --> 00:20:13,713
Yeah!
It was like four days ago!
431
00:20:13,838 --> 00:20:15,215
They're starting to remember!
432
00:20:15,340 --> 00:20:16,424
Stan.
433
00:20:16,549 --> 00:20:20,470
Your name is Stan.
434
00:20:20,595 --> 00:20:22,222
Stan Marsh.
435
00:20:22,347 --> 00:20:24,557
That's it!
Remember, son!
436
00:20:24,682 --> 00:20:26,434
Remember!
437
00:20:29,812 --> 00:20:31,105
We're sorry, Tweek!
438
00:20:31,231 --> 00:20:32,398
Are you okay, Clyde?
439
00:20:32,523 --> 00:20:34,901
Oh, son,
can you ever forgive us?
440
00:20:35,026 --> 00:20:36,236
Uh, I'm over here, Dad.
441
00:20:37,195 --> 00:20:38,195
We're sorry, kids.
442
00:20:38,279 --> 00:20:40,490
We just let all those
sensationalist news reports
443
00:20:40,615 --> 00:20:41,699
go to our heads!
444
00:20:41,824 --> 00:20:43,826
Oh, my God.
Do you see what this means?
445
00:20:43,952 --> 00:20:46,663
The ghost of human kindness
was right all along.
446
00:20:46,788 --> 00:20:48,831
You mean how he said
we should trust each other
447
00:20:48,957 --> 00:20:50,208
or how he abducted children?
448
00:20:50,333 --> 00:20:51,668
The, uh... No, no.
449
00:20:51,793 --> 00:20:53,294
The part about being
more trusting.
450
00:20:53,419 --> 00:20:55,755
We should follow what he said,
not what he did.
451
00:20:55,880 --> 00:20:57,257
- Yeah!
- Oh. Oh, yeah!
452
00:20:57,382 --> 00:20:59,259
No, no. You know
who was right all along?
453
00:20:59,384 --> 00:21:01,469
The Mongolians.
454
00:21:01,594 --> 00:21:03,763
They knew that you can't
just wall yourself off
455
00:21:03,888 --> 00:21:05,265
from the outside world.
456
00:21:05,390 --> 00:21:07,183
Putting walls up
never helps anything.
457
00:21:07,308 --> 00:21:09,936
Tearing them down
brings us together.
458
00:21:10,061 --> 00:21:11,061
- Oh!
- Right.
459
00:21:11,145 --> 00:21:12,814
Yeah, the Mongolians were right.
Yeah.
460
00:21:12,939 --> 00:21:15,566
Oh, you better not say
what I think you gonna say.
461
00:21:15,692 --> 00:21:18,695
Mr. Lu Kim, tear down this wall!
462
00:21:18,820 --> 00:21:21,614
Oh, God!
I hate this whole chitty!
463
00:21:21,739 --> 00:21:24,033
Randy, can we just
take our son home now?
464
00:21:24,158 --> 00:21:27,870
Yes.
Kids, with us, now come.
465
00:21:27,996 --> 00:21:29,247
Home.
466
00:21:29,372 --> 00:21:30,873
Home.
467
00:21:32,959 --> 00:21:33,668
Jesus Christ, dude.
468
00:21:33,793 --> 00:21:36,421
They've done some stupid crap
before, but Jesus Christ.
469
00:21:55,732 --> 00:21:59,736
I gonna get you!
Fucking Mongolian!
34434
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