All language subtitles for Maron s03e06 Node.eng

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch Download
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,076 --> 00:00:05,359 Okay. 2 00:00:06,779 --> 00:00:08,245 [raps on desk] 3 00:00:09,332 --> 00:00:12,166 God damn it! Just load! 4 00:00:12,201 --> 00:00:14,835 [sighs deeply] 5 00:00:18,040 --> 00:00:19,290 [sighs] 6 00:00:20,047 --> 00:00:21,289 What the...? 7 00:00:23,262 --> 00:00:25,429 Son of a bitch. 8 00:00:25,464 --> 00:00:28,182 ["The Poisoned Well" plays] 9 00:00:29,552 --> 00:00:32,970 Won't fall for it 10 00:00:33,055 --> 00:00:35,272 You can't see 11 00:00:35,308 --> 00:00:37,691 And you can't tell 12 00:00:37,727 --> 00:00:42,529 I just can't drink from the poisoned well 13 00:00:42,564 --> 00:00:44,064 Sync and corrections by explosiveskull www.addic7ed.com 14 00:00:44,191 --> 00:00:45,940 FEMALE VOICE: You have reached T-West. 15 00:00:45,942 --> 00:00:49,139 Press 1 for Spanish, 3 for English. 16 00:00:49,141 --> 00:00:49,904 [telephone beeps] 17 00:00:49,939 --> 00:00:53,157 Press 1 for phone. Press 2 for Internet. 18 00:00:53,209 --> 00:00:54,742 - Press ... - [telephone beeps] 19 00:00:54,794 --> 00:00:56,243 [Muzak plays] 20 00:00:56,295 --> 00:00:59,630 [knock on door] 21 00:01:01,167 --> 00:01:02,666 - Hey, man. - Hey, Bernie. 22 00:01:02,718 --> 00:01:04,585 Yeah, you got a tire. 23 00:01:04,637 --> 00:01:06,387 Yeah, yeah. 24 00:01:06,422 --> 00:01:08,639 Press 1 for billing. Press 2 for customer service. 25 00:01:08,674 --> 00:01:10,341 Press 3 for technical help. Press... 26 00:01:10,393 --> 00:01:11,508 [telephone beeps] 27 00:01:11,560 --> 00:01:13,510 Hey, man, you're being watched. 28 00:01:13,562 --> 00:01:14,895 [Muzak plays] 29 00:01:14,930 --> 00:01:16,981 Oh, God damn it. 30 00:01:17,016 --> 00:01:19,817 When the hell did he get here? 31 00:01:19,852 --> 00:01:23,520 Uh, 4:15 A.M., 7:15 Eastern. 32 00:01:23,572 --> 00:01:25,906 We've actually been watching each other. 33 00:01:25,941 --> 00:01:27,191 [laughs] 34 00:01:27,243 --> 00:01:28,742 We have an understanding. [laughs] 35 00:01:28,778 --> 00:01:30,995 All right, all right. Well, that's... that's my dad. 36 00:01:31,030 --> 00:01:33,497 Huh. You have a dad. 37 00:01:33,532 --> 00:01:34,999 That's nice. 38 00:01:35,034 --> 00:01:38,168 Long story short, I had one. 39 00:01:39,038 --> 00:01:42,122 Yeah? Well, that's mine, and that's his house. 40 00:01:42,174 --> 00:01:44,842 Press 1 for hardware issues. Press 2 for connection issues. 41 00:01:44,877 --> 00:01:45,876 [telephone beeps] 42 00:01:45,928 --> 00:01:47,261 You need a tire? 43 00:01:48,130 --> 00:01:49,513 No, I'm good on tires. 44 00:01:49,548 --> 00:01:52,049 I'm using the barter system. 45 00:01:52,101 --> 00:01:54,718 All right. Okay. Well, I'm still on the money system. 46 00:01:55,971 --> 00:01:57,388 - Press 1 for ... - Come... come on! 47 00:01:57,440 --> 00:01:59,106 [Muzak plays] 48 00:01:59,141 --> 00:02:01,525 I-I just... I don't have time to deal with this shit right now. 49 00:02:01,560 --> 00:02:03,694 I don't want to deal with it. He's just sitting out there. 50 00:02:03,729 --> 00:02:05,979 He wants me to go out there and see what's going on. 51 00:02:06,032 --> 00:02:08,449 Classic bullshit power play. 52 00:02:08,484 --> 00:02:11,869 Yeah. Or maybe he just pulled up and had a heart attack. 53 00:02:11,904 --> 00:02:13,954 'Cause that's how my dad died. 54 00:02:15,374 --> 00:02:17,574 But that was on a boat. 55 00:02:17,626 --> 00:02:18,625 Short story long. 56 00:02:18,661 --> 00:02:20,411 Press 1 for... 57 00:02:20,463 --> 00:02:22,046 - [telephone beeping] - C-Come on, come on, come on! 58 00:02:22,081 --> 00:02:24,214 I need to talk to a person! A person! 59 00:02:24,250 --> 00:02:26,216 A person, God damn it! 60 00:02:26,252 --> 00:02:27,918 Ah. You're ordering a pizza. 61 00:02:27,970 --> 00:02:31,088 What? No, I'm on the phone with my bullshit Internet company. 62 00:02:31,140 --> 00:02:35,392 Man, you got to steer clear of that shit! 63 00:02:35,428 --> 00:02:38,062 You know, like, they watch you. They hunt you. 64 00:02:38,097 --> 00:02:39,930 That's why I carry an antenna. 65 00:02:39,982 --> 00:02:43,317 They can't track your stuff through an antenna. 66 00:02:43,352 --> 00:02:44,985 [laughs] 67 00:02:45,020 --> 00:02:47,020 Okay. All right. Well, I need Wi-Fi. 68 00:02:47,073 --> 00:02:48,572 WOMAN: Thanks for waiting. How can I help you? 69 00:02:48,607 --> 00:02:50,357 Yes. Hello? Hi. 70 00:02:50,409 --> 00:02:53,110 Yes, my Internet's been going on and off for two days. 71 00:02:53,162 --> 00:02:54,828 I'd like to get it fixed now. 72 00:02:54,864 --> 00:02:57,247 I'm very sorry, sir. Please hold while I check your signal. 73 00:02:57,283 --> 00:02:58,365 - [Muzak plays] - A sconce. 74 00:02:58,417 --> 00:02:59,750 [snaps fingers] 75 00:02:59,785 --> 00:03:01,585 I could really use a sconce. 76 00:03:01,620 --> 00:03:02,953 No, Bernie. 77 00:03:03,005 --> 00:03:05,539 I-I-I don't want a tire, and I like my sconce. 78 00:03:05,591 --> 00:03:07,341 I-I-I-I'll sweeten the deal. 79 00:03:07,376 --> 00:03:09,259 I'll throw in a bunch of bricks 80 00:03:09,295 --> 00:03:11,545 and a piece of a bird bath... beautiful. 81 00:03:11,597 --> 00:03:12,629 Oh, here we go. 82 00:03:15,384 --> 00:03:18,385 Mr. Maron, I'm going to need you to restart your modem. 83 00:03:18,437 --> 00:03:20,721 Yeah, okay. I can do that. 84 00:03:25,361 --> 00:03:26,393 [sniffs] 85 00:03:26,445 --> 00:03:28,112 Where... where's my son? 86 00:03:28,147 --> 00:03:29,530 Oh, he's inside, 87 00:03:29,565 --> 00:03:32,232 giving the feds access to all his information. 88 00:03:32,284 --> 00:03:33,984 I just want to say goodbye to my son. 89 00:03:34,036 --> 00:03:35,652 Oh, what does that even mean? 90 00:03:37,206 --> 00:03:39,907 And I always wanted you to have this. 91 00:03:39,959 --> 00:03:41,458 That looks new. 92 00:03:43,045 --> 00:03:45,212 Yeah, well, I got it a couple weeks ago. 93 00:03:45,247 --> 00:03:47,164 And it means a lot. 94 00:03:47,216 --> 00:03:48,882 That's bullshit. 95 00:03:48,918 --> 00:03:50,000 Excuse me? 96 00:03:50,052 --> 00:03:51,585 No, no. Not... not... not you. 97 00:03:51,637 --> 00:03:55,005 I have a giant, sad, annoying baby on my lawn. 98 00:03:55,057 --> 00:03:56,807 We can send out a repairman tomorrow 99 00:03:56,842 --> 00:03:59,092 between noon and 4:00 P.M. 100 00:03:59,145 --> 00:04:00,811 Okay, great. 101 00:04:00,846 --> 00:04:02,146 What are you doing? 102 00:04:02,181 --> 00:04:04,565 You're just gonna drop that and leave?! 103 00:04:04,600 --> 00:04:07,818 Sir, can you write down the 10-digit repair code? 104 00:04:07,853 --> 00:04:11,772 Yeah, yeah. Just give me the number. 105 00:04:11,824 --> 00:04:16,695 4-7-4-4-3-2-8-9-8-9. 106 00:04:16,697 --> 00:04:17,778 [engine turns over] 107 00:04:17,830 --> 00:04:19,746 Okay. Thanks. 108 00:04:22,117 --> 00:04:24,001 God damn it! 109 00:04:27,206 --> 00:04:30,457 I'll trade you the knife for the tire. 110 00:04:30,509 --> 00:04:32,426 No. 111 00:04:34,430 --> 00:04:36,046 The data light is out. 112 00:04:36,098 --> 00:04:37,965 Yeah, it keeps doing that. 113 00:04:38,017 --> 00:04:39,983 Oh. There it... 114 00:04:40,019 --> 00:04:41,969 Back on. 115 00:04:42,021 --> 00:04:43,387 E-E-E... Off again. 116 00:04:43,439 --> 00:04:45,856 Right. That's why you're here, man. 117 00:04:45,891 --> 00:04:48,275 Man. 118 00:04:48,310 --> 00:04:52,946 Your cable from your router to your modem... 119 00:04:52,982 --> 00:04:54,448 it's all chewed on. 120 00:04:54,483 --> 00:04:56,033 What do you have... rats? 121 00:04:56,068 --> 00:04:58,869 No. I have cats. 122 00:05:01,824 --> 00:05:03,240 Boom! 123 00:05:03,292 --> 00:05:05,375 Nailed it. 124 00:05:09,882 --> 00:05:11,965 [sighs] 125 00:05:12,001 --> 00:05:14,501 [keys clacking] 126 00:05:18,224 --> 00:05:19,806 Shit! 127 00:05:19,842 --> 00:05:21,592 Hey! Cable dude! 128 00:05:21,644 --> 00:05:24,511 Hey! Hey, stop! 129 00:05:24,563 --> 00:05:26,513 Come on! Hey! Hey! 130 00:05:28,567 --> 00:05:30,817 I can't upload my shit! 131 00:05:34,939 --> 00:05:36,355 Well, he didn't fix it, all right? 132 00:05:36,357 --> 00:05:37,585 He just left two minutes ago, 133 00:05:37,587 --> 00:05:39,588 and now it's doing the same thing it was before. 134 00:05:39,590 --> 00:05:42,120 I'm sorry to hear that. Do you have your repair number? 135 00:05:42,172 --> 00:05:43,738 Yeah, I do. I do have it. 136 00:05:43,774 --> 00:05:48,176 Uh, 4-7-4-4-3-2-8-9-8-9. 137 00:05:48,228 --> 00:05:50,061 Nope, it's not coming up. 138 00:05:50,096 --> 00:05:52,346 I'll give you another one. 139 00:05:52,398 --> 00:05:53,815 - Ready? - Yes. 140 00:05:53,850 --> 00:05:56,350 - "A" as in "apropos"... - Okay. 141 00:05:56,402 --> 00:05:57,902 ..."S" as in "shame." 142 00:05:57,937 --> 00:05:58,986 Wait... what? 143 00:05:59,022 --> 00:06:00,521 ..."4" as in "4"... 144 00:06:00,573 --> 00:06:01,656 What? 145 00:06:01,691 --> 00:06:03,574 ...7, 8... 146 00:06:03,610 --> 00:06:05,326 "L" as in "llama"... 147 00:06:05,361 --> 00:06:07,662 "O" as in "orifice"... 148 00:06:07,697 --> 00:06:09,163 1. 149 00:06:09,199 --> 00:06:11,082 Now I'm gonna send you up to Tier 2. 150 00:06:11,117 --> 00:06:13,034 Great, because whatever's happening at this level 151 00:06:13,086 --> 00:06:14,502 is clearly not working. 152 00:06:14,537 --> 00:06:17,004 [Muzak plays] 153 00:06:24,214 --> 00:06:25,847 MAN: [Indian accent] Hello, Mr. Maron. 154 00:06:25,882 --> 00:06:28,432 How may I provide you with excellent service today? 155 00:06:28,468 --> 00:06:30,434 - You can fix my Internet. - Very good. 156 00:06:30,470 --> 00:06:32,303 First, let me to apologize 157 00:06:32,355 --> 00:06:34,856 for the problems what you've been experiencing. 158 00:06:34,891 --> 00:06:36,891 Whatever. Let's just fix it. 159 00:06:36,943 --> 00:06:38,442 And I'm going to help you with that. 160 00:06:38,478 --> 00:06:40,061 My name is Jeff. 161 00:06:40,113 --> 00:06:41,279 [scoffs] 162 00:06:41,314 --> 00:06:43,231 Really? What's your real name? 163 00:06:43,283 --> 00:06:44,354 Jeffrey. 164 00:06:44,390 --> 00:06:46,367 All right, I think we both know what's happening here. 165 00:06:46,402 --> 00:06:48,819 If we could just focus on your Internet, 166 00:06:48,872 --> 00:06:51,656 would you most kindly restart your modem for me? 167 00:06:51,708 --> 00:06:54,292 No, I've done that already. That's not the issue. 168 00:06:54,327 --> 00:06:56,410 And how am I gonna trust you, Jeffrey, 169 00:06:56,462 --> 00:06:58,412 if you are lying about who you are? 170 00:06:58,464 --> 00:07:01,999 Mr. Maron, I'm going to schedule a specialist 171 00:07:02,051 --> 00:07:04,835 to come to your home tomorrow between 8:00 A.M. and noon 172 00:07:04,888 --> 00:07:06,387 if it is most convenient. 173 00:07:06,422 --> 00:07:08,256 Is there anything else, sir? 174 00:07:08,308 --> 00:07:11,592 Yeah... just that you're full of shit, Jeff. 175 00:07:15,732 --> 00:07:18,399 [American accent] What an asshole. 176 00:07:20,353 --> 00:07:23,571 [engine shuts off] 177 00:07:27,777 --> 00:07:30,244 I want my Internet fixed now. 178 00:07:30,280 --> 00:07:31,362 No bullshit. 179 00:07:31,414 --> 00:07:33,030 That's why I'm here. 180 00:07:33,082 --> 00:07:35,249 Yeah, well, I want it actually fixed. 181 00:07:35,285 --> 00:07:36,617 None of this, like, 182 00:07:36,669 --> 00:07:39,086 "some shit that makes it seem fixed" business. 183 00:07:39,122 --> 00:07:41,372 Look, that last guy was a consultant. 184 00:07:41,424 --> 00:07:43,507 I actually work for T-West. 185 00:07:43,543 --> 00:07:46,544 I'm gonna get your Internet running today. 186 00:07:46,596 --> 00:07:48,546 Yeah, I'll believe it when I see it, pal. 187 00:07:48,598 --> 00:07:50,798 Hey. Look at me. 188 00:07:52,101 --> 00:07:53,601 I got this. 189 00:07:59,642 --> 00:08:01,726 Yeah, great. The last guy showed me the lights, too. 190 00:08:01,778 --> 00:08:03,227 But when he left, they all went out. 191 00:08:03,279 --> 00:08:04,362 [laughs] 192 00:08:04,397 --> 00:08:07,148 I'm just getting started, Marc. 193 00:08:07,200 --> 00:08:08,899 Can I... call you "Marc"? 194 00:08:08,952 --> 00:08:10,618 Yeah, I guess. 195 00:08:10,653 --> 00:08:13,487 Thank you, Marc. 196 00:08:13,539 --> 00:08:14,538 Thank you. 197 00:08:14,574 --> 00:08:15,539 [sighs] 198 00:08:15,575 --> 00:08:16,874 So, the modem is good. 199 00:08:16,909 --> 00:08:19,159 Now let's go check out that utility box. 200 00:08:20,129 --> 00:08:21,545 Okay, can we... can we... 201 00:08:21,581 --> 00:08:23,297 can we do it with less winking? 202 00:08:23,333 --> 00:08:25,082 Could... Would that be possible? 203 00:08:26,135 --> 00:08:28,002 It's just past this RV here. 204 00:08:28,054 --> 00:08:30,554 Oh, Jesus Christ. 205 00:08:30,590 --> 00:08:31,589 Hey! 206 00:08:31,641 --> 00:08:33,090 What's going on?! 207 00:08:37,263 --> 00:08:38,262 Dad! 208 00:08:38,314 --> 00:08:39,814 [engine turns over] 209 00:08:39,849 --> 00:08:40,982 Come on! 210 00:08:41,017 --> 00:08:42,433 Talk to me! 211 00:08:42,485 --> 00:08:44,018 Hey, hey! 212 00:08:44,070 --> 00:08:46,187 Where are you... What are you doing? What are... 213 00:08:54,580 --> 00:08:56,113 Hey, hold this for a second, will you? 214 00:08:56,165 --> 00:08:57,531 Huh? Yeah. 215 00:09:00,837 --> 00:09:02,420 You trust this guy? 216 00:09:02,455 --> 00:09:05,172 Yeah, it's the cable guy. It's his job to fix it. 217 00:09:05,208 --> 00:09:06,374 [laughs] 218 00:09:06,426 --> 00:09:09,293 There's too many wires, man. 219 00:09:09,345 --> 00:09:11,012 Wires are liars! 220 00:09:11,047 --> 00:09:12,596 Wires are wires. 221 00:09:12,632 --> 00:09:14,799 But I understand the apprehensiveness. 222 00:09:14,851 --> 00:09:19,737 I don't think you do understand my apprehensiveness. 223 00:09:20,857 --> 00:09:22,106 Well, everything looks good 224 00:09:22,141 --> 00:09:23,907 with your modem and your utility box. 225 00:09:23,959 --> 00:09:25,192 They are primo. 226 00:09:25,228 --> 00:09:27,028 All right, so what the hell are we gonna do about my Internet? 227 00:09:27,063 --> 00:09:29,613 Well, I'm gonna have one of our specialists come out, 228 00:09:29,649 --> 00:09:31,399 a guy who knows a lot more than me. 229 00:09:31,451 --> 00:09:33,784 Shouldn't be too hard to find a guy like that, should it? 230 00:09:33,820 --> 00:09:35,703 [Bernie laughs] 231 00:09:37,457 --> 00:09:38,906 Hey. 232 00:09:38,958 --> 00:09:40,708 We're gonna get this done. 233 00:09:41,878 --> 00:09:43,461 'Cause I care about you. 234 00:09:43,496 --> 00:09:48,082 T-West cares about you. 235 00:09:51,337 --> 00:09:54,472 It's a sign, man. 236 00:09:54,507 --> 00:09:56,307 Antennas. 237 00:10:04,817 --> 00:10:07,685 All right, what's going on, Dad? Talk to me. 238 00:10:10,323 --> 00:10:12,907 "The memories flicker across my mind 239 00:10:12,942 --> 00:10:15,109 like brown leaves in the wind." 240 00:10:15,161 --> 00:10:16,610 [sniffles] 241 00:10:16,662 --> 00:10:19,280 "I wait for the twist. It comes like a fist. 242 00:10:19,332 --> 00:10:20,364 Another bris. 243 00:10:20,416 --> 00:10:22,833 Everything is amiss. 244 00:10:22,869 --> 00:10:26,087 The waves crash against my soul. 245 00:10:26,122 --> 00:10:28,539 The murky filled bowl 246 00:10:28,591 --> 00:10:31,459 [voice breaking] is a dirty koi pond." 247 00:10:34,964 --> 00:10:36,630 Yeah. 248 00:10:36,682 --> 00:10:37,715 Yeah. 249 00:10:37,767 --> 00:10:40,267 Exactly. 250 00:10:40,303 --> 00:10:41,685 He gets it. 251 00:10:41,721 --> 00:10:43,554 All right, okay. Okay. You know what? 252 00:10:43,556 --> 00:10:45,306 It's garbage, and it's manipulative. 253 00:10:45,358 --> 00:10:47,191 What's the point of living? 254 00:10:47,226 --> 00:10:48,559 [sniffles] 255 00:10:48,611 --> 00:10:50,644 My life's been a disaster. 256 00:10:50,696 --> 00:10:52,863 Disaster's exciting! 257 00:10:52,899 --> 00:10:55,032 You don't know what you got 258 00:10:55,067 --> 00:10:58,369 until it's ripped open and the juice is loose! 259 00:11:00,156 --> 00:11:02,323 All right, well, you both seem to have 260 00:11:02,375 --> 00:11:04,875 an equal level of bullshit going on, 261 00:11:04,911 --> 00:11:06,961 so I'm gonna go inside, 262 00:11:06,996 --> 00:11:10,414 and you two guys can talk tires and poetry. 263 00:11:10,466 --> 00:11:12,716 And maybe when you stop crying, you can come inside 264 00:11:12,752 --> 00:11:14,969 and we'll try to have a conversation of some kind. 265 00:11:15,004 --> 00:11:15,970 [sobbing] 266 00:11:16,005 --> 00:11:17,838 Yeah, sounds reasonable. 267 00:11:17,890 --> 00:11:20,007 [scoffs] Okay. Perfect. 268 00:11:22,061 --> 00:11:22,763 So, we start out in life 269 00:11:22,765 --> 00:11:25,079 with these people who we have these intense feelings about 270 00:11:25,115 --> 00:11:27,665 and they're bigger than life to us, and they're just people. 271 00:11:27,700 --> 00:11:30,000 And then we grow up, and sometimes you change roles, 272 00:11:30,035 --> 00:11:31,972 where you're ending up taking care of these people 273 00:11:31,974 --> 00:11:33,003 who are so important to you. 274 00:11:33,056 --> 00:11:34,012 - I know. - It's hard, right? 275 00:11:34,047 --> 00:11:35,157 And if you don't have good boundaries... 276 00:11:35,158 --> 00:11:36,524 And you're not alone. 277 00:11:36,559 --> 00:11:39,076 Obviously, a lot of people deal with complex family issues. 278 00:11:39,111 --> 00:11:41,245 I know. And they just go on and on and on. 279 00:11:41,280 --> 00:11:43,697 They do go on. They go on... That's across the life-span. 280 00:11:43,733 --> 00:11:45,315 They're things that just keep going 281 00:11:45,351 --> 00:11:46,450 and we have to keep contending with them. 282 00:11:46,502 --> 00:11:48,202 I know, but, like... Okay, so, at some point, 283 00:11:48,254 --> 00:11:50,037 it's like things don't work out, 284 00:11:50,089 --> 00:11:51,138 and then you just have to deal with it 285 00:11:51,190 --> 00:11:52,456 and hope you don't suffer too much. 286 00:11:52,508 --> 00:11:53,641 Well, you have to accept. 287 00:11:53,693 --> 00:11:55,709 And then acceptance can lead to happiness sometimes. 288 00:11:55,761 --> 00:11:57,127 Oh, I don't know about happiness. 289 00:11:57,180 --> 00:11:58,512 But, you know, I have to accept 290 00:11:58,548 --> 00:12:00,047 that this podcast might not be posted 291 00:12:00,099 --> 00:12:01,382 because my Internet is broken. 292 00:12:01,434 --> 00:12:02,800 There's nothing I can do about it 293 00:12:02,852 --> 00:12:05,519 because my Internet company is a monopoly. 294 00:12:05,555 --> 00:12:07,972 And that is a lot like family, too. 295 00:12:08,024 --> 00:12:10,024 Is it? Who's your Internet company? 296 00:12:10,059 --> 00:12:13,143 T-West. But that's... that's... that's getting us way off topic. 297 00:12:13,196 --> 00:12:15,196 You're telling me that you're just accepting 298 00:12:15,231 --> 00:12:16,730 that you have garbage Internet? 299 00:12:16,782 --> 00:12:20,067 No, I-I actually have a pretty good situation. 300 00:12:20,119 --> 00:12:22,403 Really? What do you mean? 301 00:12:22,455 --> 00:12:24,572 They gave me a special number, and if I have a problem, I call, 302 00:12:24,624 --> 00:12:25,823 and they take care of everything. 303 00:12:25,875 --> 00:12:27,658 What?! You have a special number? 304 00:12:27,710 --> 00:12:29,410 They gave you a number to call? 305 00:12:29,462 --> 00:12:31,161 Can I have the number, please? 306 00:12:32,298 --> 00:12:34,582 Well, they... Marc, they gave it to me. 307 00:12:34,634 --> 00:12:36,834 I-I don't think I can just give it out to anyone. 308 00:12:36,886 --> 00:12:37,919 What... what? You're better than me? 309 00:12:37,971 --> 00:12:40,387 You're higher than me on the celebrity power rankings? 310 00:12:40,423 --> 00:12:42,840 Dr. Drew is higher than me? I think we're equals at least. 311 00:12:42,892 --> 00:12:44,308 I... Marc, I think this is about something 312 00:12:44,343 --> 00:12:46,010 far more than just the Internet. 313 00:12:46,062 --> 00:12:48,646 Just 'cause I have family issues doesn't mean I can't be upset 314 00:12:48,681 --> 00:12:51,432 that Dr. Drew has some magic bat-phone to T-West. 315 00:12:51,484 --> 00:12:53,150 I don't think that's exactly what I'm saying. 316 00:12:53,185 --> 00:12:54,235 What are you saying? 317 00:12:57,273 --> 00:12:58,822 I don't have the number. 318 00:13:07,500 --> 00:13:08,532 Dad! 319 00:13:08,584 --> 00:13:09,617 What?! 320 00:13:09,669 --> 00:13:12,453 All right. Just checking. 321 00:13:16,764 --> 00:13:21,482 [teakettle whistling] 322 00:13:21,578 --> 00:13:23,478 [whistling stops] 323 00:13:25,882 --> 00:13:28,049 I'm dying, son. I'm dying. 324 00:13:29,386 --> 00:13:30,969 [scoffs] Okay. 325 00:13:31,004 --> 00:13:32,837 How do you know you're dying? 326 00:13:32,889 --> 00:13:34,139 I know. 327 00:13:35,675 --> 00:13:38,259 This is exactly what you do. 328 00:13:38,311 --> 00:13:40,845 Do you know how many times in my life 329 00:13:40,897 --> 00:13:42,897 you've told me that you're dying? 330 00:13:42,933 --> 00:13:44,482 This time, I can feel it. 331 00:13:44,518 --> 00:13:45,600 Oh, really? 332 00:13:45,652 --> 00:13:48,068 What does dying feel like? 333 00:13:48,405 --> 00:13:50,321 Dark. 334 00:13:50,357 --> 00:13:51,940 [doorbell rings] 335 00:13:51,942 --> 00:13:53,608 I never thought I would say this, 336 00:13:53,610 --> 00:13:56,444 but I'm... I'm actually grateful 337 00:13:56,496 --> 00:13:59,697 to have to deal with my shitty Internet right now. 338 00:14:06,957 --> 00:14:09,123 Oh, look... it's the specialist. 339 00:14:09,125 --> 00:14:10,291 Modem's in here. 340 00:14:10,293 --> 00:14:12,126 I don't need to see it. 341 00:14:12,128 --> 00:14:13,795 What? 342 00:14:13,797 --> 00:14:15,797 You've had two guys look at it. 343 00:14:15,799 --> 00:14:17,902 Forget it. It's pointless. 344 00:14:20,554 --> 00:14:23,915 I was reading over your repair report. 345 00:14:25,225 --> 00:14:27,642 And, uh... 346 00:14:27,644 --> 00:14:30,395 [chuckling] It's... it's shit. 347 00:14:30,447 --> 00:14:34,732 It's... it's just shit. 348 00:14:34,784 --> 00:14:37,819 You know what I was thinking about when I was reading this? 349 00:14:37,821 --> 00:14:39,621 "Cool hand Luke." 350 00:14:39,656 --> 00:14:41,706 The system's not gonna change. 351 00:14:41,741 --> 00:14:44,492 They need you to break. They need you to give in. 352 00:14:44,544 --> 00:14:45,827 [chuckles] 353 00:14:45,879 --> 00:14:48,213 And if they can't, they'll kill you. 354 00:14:49,916 --> 00:14:52,834 Okay, well, that's... that's pretty intense. 355 00:14:52,836 --> 00:14:55,553 But, uh, I just want my Internet to work. 356 00:14:55,589 --> 00:14:59,757 You think T-West cares if you have a good connection? 357 00:14:59,809 --> 00:15:00,892 No, I don't. 358 00:15:00,927 --> 00:15:03,678 You're goddamn right, they don't. 359 00:15:03,680 --> 00:15:06,330 The whole setup is a joke. [chuckles] 360 00:15:06,382 --> 00:15:08,683 So, I'm... I'm taking it you're not a company man. 361 00:15:08,735 --> 00:15:10,602 [chuckles] 362 00:15:12,272 --> 00:15:14,689 [sighs] I'm gonna tell you something 363 00:15:14,741 --> 00:15:17,191 that nobody on your side of the fence 364 00:15:17,244 --> 00:15:18,576 is supposed to know. 365 00:15:18,612 --> 00:15:19,944 Come here. 366 00:15:22,282 --> 00:15:25,199 It's the node. 367 00:15:25,201 --> 00:15:28,253 It's the goddamn node. 368 00:15:30,290 --> 00:15:32,206 The node, huh? 369 00:15:32,208 --> 00:15:34,876 The node. 370 00:15:34,878 --> 00:15:37,045 That's it right there. That's the node. 371 00:15:37,097 --> 00:15:38,096 Ahhhh. 372 00:15:38,131 --> 00:15:39,547 What's it do? 373 00:15:39,549 --> 00:15:41,716 It's a redistribution point. 374 00:15:41,718 --> 00:15:45,270 The signal goes into the node, and then it sends the Internet 375 00:15:45,355 --> 00:15:47,605 out to everybody in the neighborhood. 376 00:15:47,641 --> 00:15:49,057 Oh. And it's broken? 377 00:15:49,109 --> 00:15:51,109 Nope... overloaded. [exhales] 378 00:15:51,144 --> 00:15:53,061 Oh, we got an overloaded node. 379 00:15:53,063 --> 00:15:54,562 Yep. Needs to be split. 380 00:15:54,614 --> 00:15:56,064 We need a node splitter? 381 00:15:56,116 --> 00:15:57,231 Yep. 382 00:15:57,233 --> 00:15:58,733 But that could take weeks. 383 00:15:58,735 --> 00:15:59,951 Why? 384 00:15:59,986 --> 00:16:02,236 Because T-West doesn't split the node 385 00:16:02,238 --> 00:16:04,405 unless it's at 87%. 386 00:16:04,407 --> 00:16:06,457 Yours is at 83%. 387 00:16:06,493 --> 00:16:09,294 So I just have to live with an overloaded node? 388 00:16:09,329 --> 00:16:10,828 That's it. 389 00:16:12,465 --> 00:16:14,582 Yeah. Bullshit. They don't care. 390 00:16:14,634 --> 00:16:15,917 It's total bullshit. 391 00:16:15,969 --> 00:16:17,585 - Well, hey, Bernie. - Hey. 392 00:16:17,637 --> 00:16:19,971 - Will you hold that for me for one second? - Sure. 393 00:16:20,006 --> 00:16:21,806 What's happening? 394 00:16:21,841 --> 00:16:23,841 [chuckles] 395 00:16:26,429 --> 00:16:28,596 Even trade. 396 00:16:28,598 --> 00:16:29,847 Sure. Whatever. 397 00:16:29,899 --> 00:16:31,316 I just broke the chains. 398 00:16:31,351 --> 00:16:32,433 [laughs] 399 00:16:32,485 --> 00:16:34,268 I'm a free man. 400 00:16:34,321 --> 00:16:35,520 Thank you. 401 00:16:35,572 --> 00:16:36,688 Yeah. 402 00:16:36,740 --> 00:16:38,856 Hoo-hoo-hoo! 403 00:16:50,453 --> 00:16:51,836 [gun clicking] 404 00:16:51,871 --> 00:16:53,171 Ahhhhh! 405 00:16:53,206 --> 00:16:54,288 There. 406 00:16:54,341 --> 00:16:55,673 There! 407 00:17:00,714 --> 00:17:02,296 God damn it. 408 00:17:14,227 --> 00:17:16,194 WOMAN: Good evening. This is Tier 3. 409 00:17:16,229 --> 00:17:18,312 I didn't even know there was a Tier 3. 410 00:17:18,365 --> 00:17:20,648 Do you need my, uh, 10-digit repair number? 411 00:17:20,700 --> 00:17:22,984 Nope. I'm looking at your report right now. 412 00:17:23,036 --> 00:17:24,369 Oh, my God. 413 00:17:24,404 --> 00:17:26,487 I can't believe what you've been through. 414 00:17:26,489 --> 00:17:28,489 Look, I know about the node. 415 00:17:28,491 --> 00:17:30,041 I need a node splitter. 416 00:17:30,076 --> 00:17:33,828 Yeah, I don't know what a node splitter is. 417 00:17:33,880 --> 00:17:36,381 Sorry. Nothing more we can do. 418 00:17:36,416 --> 00:17:39,550 Wait! Wait! I know Dr. Drew. 419 00:17:39,586 --> 00:17:43,221 In that case, you can expect a call from Tier 4. 420 00:17:44,224 --> 00:17:46,257 Hello? 421 00:17:46,309 --> 00:17:48,342 Hello? 422 00:17:59,572 --> 00:18:00,855 Dad? 423 00:18:03,109 --> 00:18:05,359 Dad? 424 00:18:05,361 --> 00:18:06,828 Hello? 425 00:18:08,782 --> 00:18:10,832 [sighs] 426 00:18:28,829 --> 00:18:31,213 [cellphone vibrating] 427 00:18:40,891 --> 00:18:42,057 Hello? 428 00:18:42,092 --> 00:18:44,560 MAN: Hey, man. How's it going? 429 00:18:44,595 --> 00:18:46,011 Who's this? 430 00:18:46,063 --> 00:18:48,564 Oh, come on, Marc. You know who this is. 431 00:18:48,599 --> 00:18:50,516 This is Tier 4. 432 00:18:50,568 --> 00:18:52,768 Hey. 433 00:18:52,820 --> 00:18:55,070 Do you need my 10-digit repair number? 434 00:18:55,105 --> 00:18:56,405 No. 435 00:18:56,440 --> 00:18:58,574 Why do you give it out if you never need it? 436 00:18:58,609 --> 00:19:02,194 Well, to give people something to hold on to... hope. 437 00:19:02,196 --> 00:19:04,530 Yeah, I'm not feeling that. 438 00:19:04,532 --> 00:19:07,866 Things aren't always what they seem, Marc. 439 00:19:07,868 --> 00:19:11,954 Sometimes what's going on is deeper and more impactful. 440 00:19:12,006 --> 00:19:14,373 The real truth is underneath. 441 00:19:14,425 --> 00:19:15,874 Okay. 442 00:19:15,926 --> 00:19:17,543 All right, I get that. 443 00:19:17,595 --> 00:19:19,545 But I still need Internet. 444 00:19:19,547 --> 00:19:20,879 Everyone needs Internet. 445 00:19:20,931 --> 00:19:22,464 But that doesn't mean 446 00:19:22,516 --> 00:19:24,766 that what you're feeling right now is about the Internet, 447 00:19:24,802 --> 00:19:27,052 because it's not. 448 00:19:27,054 --> 00:19:31,056 It's about a deep-rooted need for justice 449 00:19:31,108 --> 00:19:33,892 and fear of not being in control. 450 00:19:33,944 --> 00:19:36,445 Yeah. I understand that. 451 00:19:36,480 --> 00:19:39,731 It's about something deeper. 452 00:19:39,733 --> 00:19:44,286 You need to stop yelling at your girlfriends. 453 00:19:44,321 --> 00:19:47,289 You need to make up with your father. 454 00:19:47,324 --> 00:19:49,324 And you need to stop watching porn. 455 00:19:49,376 --> 00:19:51,627 You don't watch a lot, but you watch enough. 456 00:19:51,662 --> 00:19:53,629 I don't watch anything that weird. 457 00:19:53,664 --> 00:19:57,082 A couple of weeks ago, it got a little weird. 458 00:19:57,134 --> 00:19:59,935 Well, yeah, but, you know, when you get into the Baltic stuff, 459 00:19:59,970 --> 00:20:01,470 you really don't know what's gonna happen. 460 00:20:01,505 --> 00:20:03,422 And then... I-I don't know. 461 00:20:03,424 --> 00:20:05,007 All right, so, what's your point? 462 00:20:05,059 --> 00:20:07,593 Y-You... you want me to engage in my life 463 00:20:07,595 --> 00:20:09,595 and... and be a better person? 464 00:20:09,597 --> 00:20:12,648 Yeah. Be a stand-up guy. 465 00:20:14,151 --> 00:20:15,601 Okay. 466 00:20:15,603 --> 00:20:16,985 Done. 467 00:20:17,021 --> 00:20:18,937 Okay. 468 00:20:18,989 --> 00:20:20,822 I just split the node. 469 00:20:21,825 --> 00:20:23,358 You can just do it from there? 470 00:20:23,410 --> 00:20:24,993 Yeah. 471 00:20:25,029 --> 00:20:27,579 I'm the node splitter. 472 00:20:40,761 --> 00:20:42,711 [sighs] 473 00:20:42,763 --> 00:20:45,847 Sometimes I feel completely hopeless. 474 00:20:45,883 --> 00:20:47,633 Yeah. 475 00:20:47,685 --> 00:20:49,968 Me too. 476 00:20:49,970 --> 00:20:51,353 But not right now. 477 00:20:51,388 --> 00:20:53,438 Everything's all right. 478 00:20:54,892 --> 00:20:56,725 It's good to see you, Dad. 479 00:21:00,614 --> 00:21:02,314 Shit, yes! 480 00:21:02,316 --> 00:21:03,398 Internet's working. 481 00:21:03,450 --> 00:21:05,784 Well, now. How about that? 482 00:21:06,965 --> 00:21:15,465 Sync and corrections by explosiveskull www.addic7ed.com 483 00:21:15,515 --> 00:21:20,065 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 33119

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.