All language subtitles for First.Dates.S21E01.1080p.HDTV.H264-DARKFLiX[EZTVx.to]_track4_eng

This program me contains strong
language, discussions of suicide

and scenes that some viewers
may find upsetting

This is a restaurant like no other.

Tell me, why on earth
are you single?

I just attract absolute arseholes.

Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.

Yeah, I'm sorry too.

Hello, Fred.

These hopeful singletons...

Hi!

...are about to take a bold step...

Are you ready?

Yeah. I'm ready, I'm ready,
I'm ready.

...into the unknown.

Questions you ask on a date.

For some...

Shit. She's so pretty.

...romance is on the horizon.

Oh, that was quite nice, wasn't it?

But the path to love is...

Shit!

...unpredictable.

I own a dungeon.

And Cupid's arrow

can sometimes miss its mark.

Oh, my God.

Wahey!

That was weird.

I've been with my current
partner for a year.

You clearly did not listen. I know.

You're a typical woman.

SHE GASPS

His mum is also on a date.

Bit soon to meet the parents.

Hi!

We make it happen, baby.

Ooh, there was a kiss.

I make it all happen.

One meal...

I don't want this to end.

Hi. Hi.

...one big question.

Would you like to see
each other again?

How many have you had?

I think I might need to drink
a bit more

if I'm going to have dinner
with you.

This is the new First Dates
restaurant.

We're back.

The First Dates restaurant
has been open for ten years.

Cheers.

I can't believe it's been ten years.

We have seen so many people
fall in love.

In Italy, it's no birthday
without a cake. Aw!

So happy birthday.

When we started, I was barely 18.

Can you imagine?

You and me both, mate.

Now we're in Bath.

Beautiful city, full of history.

Romantic.

So let's make love happen.

The biggest lessons I've learned
over the years is that

one thing unites us all -

our desire to love and to be loved.

# I could be your fantasy

# I could tell you got
big dick energy

# It ain't too many of 'em
that can handle me... #

Oh, my gosh, she looks amazing.

# Make em sing to this thing... #

How are you? I'm good.

# It ain't too many of 'em
that can handle me... #

# I could be your fantasy

# Tell me how you want it... #

What's your name, please?

Mercedes.

Mercedes, what are you doing here?

Well... You can't find a man?

No, I can't fucking find a man.

MUSIC STOPS

I'd date her.

So, are you ready for your date?

Yeah.

I'm not gonna ask you if you're
confident, because you look

very confident to me.

What would you say the biggest
misconception about you is?

Um, that I'm a dumb blonde.

What would you like?

Um, apple juice if you have any.

How does that make you feel?

It's all right. I don't really care.

I know what I'm worth.

That's all that matters.

Well, I guess it matters because
I can't find a boyfriend but yeah.

So how long have you been single?

Mm... A long, long time.

Oh. What do you think is
holding you back?

I can't read people very well.

Ah.

I've been with absolutely terrible
people because I won't see those,

like, glaringly obvious red flags.

I've got Asperger's.

Ah, right.

So, yeah, when it comes
to social skills... Yes.

I just miss so many of these,
like, social cues.

But normal people just get it
and they just have these

normal-arse relationships.

And there's me like, "Why
can't I just, like, be normal?”

Savage. No, it's all right.
I don't want to be normal.

Normal's boring.

How are you?

OK. Thank you.

You're looking good.
You've been on holiday?

Yes, I've just got back.
Got back on Monday.

Where were you?

I was in Benidorm.

Oh, nice. My favourite.

Come with me. Thank you.

This is 54 year old Georgina.

I do not have the patience for this.

There you are. Thank you.

Take a seat. Thank you.

I'm here today to find the man of
my dreams, because I'm not doing

a very good job at finding
him myself.

There you are.

Oh. Thank you.

Are you looking for something
specific with your date today?

I'd like someone that makes me
laugh, that enjoys going out,

that is a friend and that
little bit extra.

It's not much to ask, is it?

It's not, is it? I'm not
asking for a lot.

No.

Armed with his favourite party shirt
is Georgina's date,

56-year-old part-time D) Steve.

# Let's move tonight... #

Why do you think you're single?

Well, nobody goes out
anymore, do they?

Back in the '80s, Friday and
Saturday nights, you'd go to a pub,

you have a few beers,
look across the room,

catch somebody's eye.

Hi, my name's Steve. What's yours?

How you doing? Hi, Fred.
How are you?

Nice to meet you. You're
looking forward to this?

Er, yeah, a little bit.
You look like you are.

I mean, where does this shirt
come from?

My daughter chose it for me
yesterday.

Oh, did she? Yes.

This morning I went to have
my nose and ears waxed.

Come with me. Thank you.

I really want to make a good
impression.

Hello. There you are. Hello.

Hi. How are you?

All right thank you, are you?

I'm Steve. Georgina.
Good to meet you.

Hi, Georgina.

Looking lovely. Thank you.

What's missing from my life
is a partner.

I just want to enjoy some life
whilst I've still got

some life in me.

I'll have a vodka Diet Coke, please.

Lovely. Straight away.
Thank you very much.

So, Georgina, how are you?

I'm all right thank you. I need
to say your name three times.

Georgina. Georgina. Georgina.

I've forgot yours.

Steve.

Steve.

You're looking lovely.

Oh, thank you. Bless you.

Looks like you've been away as well.
Have you been away?

I have, yeah. Have you?
Thank you. Pleasure.

I've just got back from Benidorm.

Do you like Benidorm? So have I!

You haven't!

I have about three weeks ago.

So you like Benidorm?

Love Benidorm.
That's a pretty good start.

Isn't it?

It is.

Cheers.

Good date.

What kind of guys do you attract?

I attract bad guys.

Typically, most of my exes have
been in good shape, muscly.

You're looking good today.
What's your name?

Jamie. Jamie.

Oh, my gosh, young man.

Yes, I can tell instantly
if I fancy someone.

Oh, he looks fit.

You can look at someone and
think, "Oh, they look good,”

but I need personality.

You tricked me.

Maybe next one.

Hi.

Mercedes' dinner date for this
evening is 26-year-old gamer Greg.

# Good lover... #

So I'm interested in video games.

I play with, uh, my group of nerdy
mates, but, um, it is good fun.

It's the only place that you can say
a monk punched a space mouse

in my pocket, for example.

# And when I see his face, I feel
like I could win the race... #

The bit that everyone loves in video
games, it's a nice little escape.

Doesn't feel as hurtful when, like,
Luigi overtakes me on lap three

as...as being ghosted.

# I wouldn't send him back

# He won me game, set, and match. #

How are you?

I'm well.

What's your name, please?

My name's Greg.

Some girls say like, oh yeah,
you're cute or adorable

was the latest girl that ghosted me.

You feeling good?

Excited. Obviously a bit nervous.

There's a lot of women that
I find attractive.

Like, we could be talking about
Margot Robbie, but I'm usually

interested in people that aren't
particularly interested in me.

You ready?

As I'll ever be. Come with me.

OK. Thank you.

There you are.

Hi.

Nice to meet you. Good to meet you.

What's your name?

My name's Greg. What's yours?

Greg. Mercedes.

Mercedes. Like the car.

What would you like?

Um, I actually have no idea.

What you having?

Juice.

How about I have the same to
start with.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Oh, God.

So...

So, when was your last date?

Oh, February the 13th.

Wow. That's very specific.

So just before Valentine's Day.

Ended up a shit show, though,
because that's why I'm here.

So, yeah.

When was your last date?

Yeah. So a couple months back.

It was OK, like, she was a
Yeah. So a couple months back.

It was OK, like, she was a
mental health worker. Oh, right.

So, you know, she...she...she was
all right with my difficulties.

No. I'm kidding.

What did you mean about
difficulties?

Oh, well, I was just, like, joking,
but, um, I do have depression,

but who doesn't?

Um, it is treated.

I do go to counselling.

That's all right. I'm on
Sertraline, so chill.

I used to be on Sertraline.

And I'm autistic, but that's not
to do with the Sertraline.

No, of course not. No.

So when were you diagnosed?

This is like speaking
with your doctor.

Could I have the cheeseburger,
please?

Cheeseburger. I'm gonna go
for the chicken kebab.

Thank you. Thank you.
Thank you as well.

Thank you, thank you. Cheers.

What was your highlight of Benidorm?

One night, we dressed up
as senoritas.

We went to see Tom Jones.

Benidorm Tom, is it?

Benidorm Tom, he's amazing. Yeah.

So where do you go?

I did quite a few times
in the Zodiac Bar,

been hypnotised in there once.

Oh, have you? Yeah.

Yeah, Cafe Benidorm you've
always got to go and do.

On the way home.

Have you been in Jail Rock?

Yeah, I like it in there. That's
good. That's my favourite. Yeah.

Is that where you saw,
um, Benidorm Tom?

No, he was in Sinatras.
Was he? Right.

Do you go a lot then?

Er, maybe once a year.

But I'm maybe getting a little bit
sick of going with my mates.

Oh, yeah.

Nice to go with somebody
else to enjoy it with.

Menu for you. Thank you.

And for you. Enjoy your date, guys.
Have fun.

Thank you.

Oh!

She looks classically, like,
gorgeous.

He looks like someone... More the
nerdy vibes. More a nerdy vibe.

Works with me.

Where did you go to uni?

So I didn't actually go to uni.

I did open university.

Psychology. What about you?

I did psychology for my undergrad
and then I did neuroscience

for my master's.

Wow. Very impressive.

So brains and beauty.

Sorry. Oh... That was so cheesy.
So cheesy.

Oh! No, it's all right. Ignore that.

What do you do for a job?

So, I work at a building
society in a branch.

What the fuck is that?

So it's like a bank.

Oh! Yeah. Is that not boring?

I struggle with a lot of
social things,

whether it's like social nuances
or knowing what's appropriate.

I wonder where the toilet is,
I'm bursting for a piss.

It just takes me a lot longer
to process.

When was the last time you had sex?

That's a bit much on a first date.

I'm feeling that there is
a connection.

Yeah. We like the same holidays.

Oh, where?

Benidorm.

Oh! Espana. I love Benidorm.

Do party?

Oh, yeah. We like to go out.

Yeah, we like to. Yes? Yes.

Are you a party person?

No, I don't even, like, stay awake
past 10 pm every day.

That's cool you've got a bedtime.

So I have a party trick.

Yeah? Oh, have you?

Are you ready? Yeah.

That's very good.

What did he do?

He's just done a forward roll.

Oh, really?

Thank you. Thank you.

You're welcome. Enjoy.

Thank you. I will enjoy, yes,
thank you very much.

Have you tried Internet dating?

Yeah.

I've not seen you on it.

Is that because you're not
on it or...?

Not really, no.

I was married for 25 years.

Two lovely daughters.

OK.

What about you?

I have been married twice.

Have you?

Yeah, the first time I was only 21.

And I think it was just a bit young
and too...too soon. OK.

So that only lasted a couple
of years.

I got married again.

I was with him for about 15 years,
and we had two beautiful

little girls, Bobby and Danny.

They were perfectly healthy up
until being three years old.

And then Bobby got a disease
called Batten's disease.

Oh, right. OK. You ever heard
of Batten's disease?

No, I've not heard of that.

She used to love jigsaws.

She could sit and do a
40 piece jigsaw,

she'd just sit and do it.

And she wasn't getting
the pieces in.

So we knew that something
wasn't quite right.

So it's a genetic brain disorder.

And it's... Simple explanation is
that the matter that's in the brain

builds up and the gene that
clears it, she hadn't got.

So the brain just builds up
with this...this waste matter.

Oh, George, that's really sad.
I know.

Eventually they lose their sight,
they lose the speech.

I don't know what to say.
I know, I know.

That's, er... Yeah.

So we got her home.

And we watched Barney on the telly
because she loved Barney.

And then she slowly passed
away at home.

How do you come to terms with that?
How do you...?

What choice do you have?

Well, you don't really, do you?

No.

Basically I didn't want to be here
when they told me about Bobby,

but I'd still got Danny.

And then it wasn't long, just
before her third birthday,

and she had a seizure.

I just knew from that point that
Danny had got it as well.

Oh. So I lost them both when they
were both eight years old.

They were just such beautiful
little girls.

They absolutely meant
everything to me.

They were just my world.

That's the reason me and my husband
split up because we were basically

focusing on them and looking
after them, and we sort

of just grew apart.

I had a good six months on my own,
and then I thought,

"Right, well, we'll date again.”

So I met somebody else and loved him
to bits, absolutely adored him.

And I was with him for four
and a half years and

he took his own life.

Oh, no!

You didn't find him, did you, or...?

Did you?

That must have been
really hard for you.

That's really sad.

And I have lost my best friend
to suicide just recently.

Oh, have you?

Yeah. And I loved him to bits.

Yeah.

Well, you probably have questions
you want answering,

and you can't have an answer,
can you?

That's how I am as well. Yeah.

with what I've been through,
| just think life is too short.

I just want my life to be happy now.

I don't want any more complications.

So did you...did you...do
counselling?

I did about three sessions.

I didn't rate it, really.

Did you not?

I tried marriage guidance.

Oh, did you?

That obviously didn't work.

What do you do with your
mates for fun?

Sometimes I will be playing Dungeons
and Dragons with my friends.

It is a lot of fun.

Do you think you'd make
a good boyfriend?

Um, no, I think...

I think I'm all right.

I think I think people could do
a lot worse.

So why did you have, like,
depression and shit?

I don't know, I think loneliness
contributes to it.

Aw.

What did you not have many
friends or something?

No, I mean, I do have, like, a tight
circle, you know, I don't know,

it doesn't feel like I've got to
where I want to be in life just yet.

Yeah.

There's definitely times where
I compare myself to my friends.

I've got some friends who are
getting married.

It feels like there's something
wrong with me sometimes.

I don't know, I just... A lot of the
time, I don't always feel

the best about myself.

How many long-term relationships
have you had in the past?

None.

None?

Like, the kinds of people
that I've fallen for just

weren't interested in me
for the most part.

I find it hard to put myself
out there, like,

I want to be a genuine version
of myself, but I also

don't want to put someone
off immediately either.

It's like the way I view it is some
people, they can grow together

for their whole lives.

So you just got to find that person
that you can grow together with.

That's how I always think
of it, like plants.

Can you pinch me, please? Hi.

I've been watching you for
SO many years.

Don't look, don't look now. Why?

The woman behind you... Yeah?
..Is from Real Housewives.

You know, Real Housewives
of Cheshire.

No, what's this?

It's fantastic.

Are you ready for your date?

Let's go. Come with me.

Oh, look at her.

Oh-ho! Wow. I know, literally.

There you are.

Do you know who she is?

She's a celebrity.

Is she?

who is she?

The Real Housewives of Cheshire.

I didn't even know that was
a program me.

Right, we're tucking into this lot.
Are we?

We'll put that in the middle, look.
What's that?

Chocolate. Chocolate.

Strawberries and marshmallows.

That's Biscoff.

Easy for you to say.

That is good.

That was fun.

That was really good.

Proper enjoyed it.

Open wide.

Ready.

Was there a bit of spark there,
do you think?

I think so, she...she made
something sparkle in me.

All right?

That was great.

Enjoyed it.

He was so funny and we had
so much in common,

especially Benidorm.

Cheers.

Hi.

Hello.

How are you?

All right, you?
Good to see you again.

I drop the bill, too. Thank you.
Thank you. I'll have that.

Would you like to see
each other again?

Who goes first here?

Do I go first or do you want
to go first?

Don't mind. Shall I go first?

I don't mind, it's up to you.

I'm quite happy to go first
if you want me to.

I'll go first. You go first, then.

I'd like... I would, but I don't
think there's an attraction,

a physical attraction. Right, OK.

But I think you're a fabulous
bloke and I'd love...

That's nice of you to say.
I think we...

I think we would have a fabulous
night out together.

I think we would actually.
I think we would

cos we've got a lot in common.
OK, yeah. Yeah?

Shall we go halves?

No.

Thank you very much.

Aw, thank you. Thank you.

No-one's ever paid for me before.

Have they not? No.

Give over! They haven't.

I thought there was maybe a
little bit of a spark for me, but,

you know, if there isn't for you,
that's fair enough.

Thanks very much. Thank you.

Have a lovely afternoon.

Lovely to meet you. You too.

Take care. Nice to meet you.
Thank you, Fred. Thanks very much.

I just can't imagine what you've
been through and be such

a lovely lady.

Aw. And you was.

And, you know, a really nice smile,
a lovely twinkle in your eye.

So, well on you.
Not glazed over now?

Well, look, well on you.
Good on you, darling,

you know, proper lovely.

Thank you. Oh, this is nice.

It is. Isn'tit?

You know, if you ever want to talk.
And you.

Yeah, well, look... For your
experience.

Yes. I've been there and can maybe
help you through a bit.

Thank you.

I've had a lovely time.
Me too. Thank you.

Good to see you.

Bye.

Coffee?

Yes, Merlin.

Oh, it's so pretty in here.

It's lovely, isn't it?

What a pretty restaurant.

Cheshire Housewife Lauren is ready to
share the spotlight with someone

who could bring a little
excitement into her life.

Everywhere I go, people do know me.

I mean, just now on the train,
three people said, "Oh, Lauren!"

I've got used to it.

It's my normal way of life.

It's a... Look, it's a fly on
the wall on our lives.

So you follow us around,
marriages or break-ups.

I think people think I'm this
wild, crazy girl.

I don't need to be in the best
restaurant, on the best

beaches, I quite... I'm
quite hippy-ish really.

Although I do like to fly
first class.

So I started off married and
unfortunately

got divorced on the show.

Oh, I'm sorry. OK.

So come on, you've come to us now.
Yeah.

What's your normal type?

Well, the problem I've been having
is I go for guys too young.

How young is too young? What, like,
a couple of years younger?

Like, decades younger.

The last four boyfriends have been
20 years younger than me,

which has been interesting,
really fun, very sexy.

But I think it's time for me to
grow up and meet my soulmate.

It's time to change.

I can't marry someone
20 years younger.

There's only so much work
I can do to my face.

I need quite a sensible,
sophisticated man.

I think I see myself with an
entrepreneurial kind of man.

Hi.

Proving that money can't buy you love
is self-made business owner Chiles.

How rich are you, then?

Um, I'm not rich enough.

How are you?

Very good, Fred, how are you?

Yeah, good thank you very much.
Good to meet you.

What's your name, please?

Chiles. Chiles, tell me, what do
you do for a living?

I'm an entrepreneur, mainly around
construction and exporting.

What about women, then?
What's happening there?

Yeah, so I've probably been focusing
far too much on work, yeah.

I'm attracted to the girls
that emanate trouble,

that are probably hard work.

I kind of like to go, "Ah, OK.
This is a bit of a challenge."

Are you ready to meet her?

Absolutely.

Let's go. Great.

Here we go. Hello. Hi.

Hi, Chiles. Pleased to meet you.

Lauren.

Lauren.

Have you been here a while?

Yeah.

I can tell.

They're not both yours, are they?

Can I get you a drink?

Ah, do you know how to do
a pisco sour?

No problem. Amazing.

You look absolutely stunning.

Oh, thank you.

And where are you from?

I grew up in Cheshire.

Nice. Lovely, lovely.
I'm from Manchester.

So, what do you do? What do
you do? What's your...?

I think you know what I do.

No, I have no idea.
Have you no clue?

No idea. Have you no clue?

Why? Why would I have guessed?

There's a story there, right?

I'm gonna just slide that in there.
Thank you. Oh, that's perfect.

Burger and chips for you. Thank you.

And a steak. Medium rare.

Oh, my God. Thank you.

You are so welcome.

Pornstar Martini is now the most
popular cocktail in the country.

Why is it called a porn star martini?

Really, really, really simple.

Sex sells.

Would you ever do porn?

Sorry?

I mean... Well, I've got
you thinking.

Depends how big your dick
is, though, so.

Yeah, that is true.

Nah, it's all right. There's, like,
small penis stuff out there, so...

You'd be surprised the amount of
people that want

their small penis humiliated.

What do you do for work?

So when I finished uni, it was,
like, it's hard to get a job.

Yeah. I got a first in everything
and then you step into the real

world and it's like, what?
Like, you can't get a job.

So I was like, maybe I should
just try something to kind of earn

a little bit of money on the side.

I do OnlyFans.

Oh, how gorgeous you are.

Thank you. She is, isn't she?
Absolutely stunning.

Oh, yeah.

What do you reckon, a bottle
of Prosecco?

Bottle of Prosecco? I don't
drink Prosecco. Don't you?

Champagne?

Mm. OK. I'll have a bottle
of champagne, please.

Thank you.

I'm very intrigued by what you do.

You're very secretive about it.

Stripper.

Are you really?

Are you...are you serious?

Are you?

I'm obviously not a stripper.

How many have you had?

How many have I had? One.

Clearly too many.

OK.

I believe you.

I think I might need to drink
a bit more if I'm going to

have dinner with you.

I work in television on The Real
Housewives of Cheshire,

which is highly publicised in
Manchester, so I would assume

you would have known.

Ah, OK. I don't watch...
Which might sound a little bit...

Oh, my God. Right. OK.

Sorry, sorry. Yeah. OK.

Now it makes sense, OK.

Have you ever been with anyone
who's like a sex worker before?

No. No. This... So this would
be my...my first time.

Is this is your first encounter?

No, no, I mean...

SHE LAUGHS

So basically, I just make loads
of content, pictures, videos

in all sorts, like, underwear.

Yeah, I basically just help people
get erections all over the world.

It's good.

OK. Don't look at me like that.

No, I was...I was... No, I'm...

What did you think I do for work?

I don't know.

I didn't assume anything,
but wow, OK.

Approximately how much money
do you make a year?

Uh, well, so far over the two
years |'ve...

My net worth is 400,000.

I made 70K in a month.

So I've made more money
so far in this career

that I would have made, having
done something in neuroscience.

A lot of the time, these girls,
they're not dumb girls, like,

a lot of the girls there are
actually paying their way

through uni and shit.

So and they're there working
their arse off and they're good

at what they do.

Well, they can't work their arse
off, they need it. It's an asset.

I mean, I know why I can't
have a normal relationship.

I have a very interesting job and
I'm quite a complicated person,

but I think I deserve to be loved.

I feel like it's high time.

A lot of people have a
problem with it, so...

No, I believe sex work's
real work, so...

That's a very good thing to say.

Sorry, this is... Thank you.

Now that looks fantastic.

It does, isn't it? You're welcome.

Enjoy. Thank you very much.
Thank you.

So, what are you looking for?

Oh, gosh.

I'm looking for someone
that's kind, generous,

makes me laugh.

And look, I've been married once.

I did 12 years, which is good
innings. Yeah, it is good.

I've been divorced seven.

And what's happened over those
seven years that you haven't

met that person?

I've been going out with
really naughty boys.

That are wild.

I put it to the universe.

You know, do you believe that
if you see it and it happens.

Yeah, it manifests.

It has! Yeah, you manifest
it, right.

So you manifested all the bad boys?

Yeah. Did you?

Yeah.

When I was going through a divorce,
I started reading a lot

of self-help books.

And what I've been doing recently,
it's a little cup and you can

fill it with different crystals
depending on

what you're wanting to manifest.

You put the stone in the water
and you would say,

thank you, universe, for giving me
my soul mate.

I'm interviewing my soul mate
at the moment.

Could you be the one?

And you just sip the water
so you're actually

drinking your manifestations?

Pretty much everything I've
manifest has come true.

What happens if another
bad boy comes along?

What would make you change?

Because I won't want to look
at another bad boy.

I'll just know. I'll get that
fuzzy feeling.

You know, when you go to bed
at night and you actually

want to put your foot next
to somebody.

And you want to hold their hand.

That's the feeling when you know.

Right now it's my dog.

Salute.

Salute.

Can I get a normal glass?

You want a normal glass? You won't
drink out of one of these?

No. I'm so picky. I'm so sorry.

That's all right.

When it comes to finding true love,

trainee teacher Ashley has
been doing his homework.

I've planned my wedding already.

I've planned it since I was three.

So tell me, what are you
looking for today?

I do have a list.

Oh, wonderful.

They have to be at least six foot,
good hair,

the hair colour doesn't matter,
but ginger is preferred.

They have to be a little bit
delulu.

What's delulu?

We're living a little, like, fantasy
world. So a little bit delulu.

They have to be funny.

But the important part is they have
to be less funny than me. Oh.

My type tends to be someone
with a passion and romance.

I love all of that. Like a little
Shakespeare play.

I love that, although there's
a lot of death in...

Yeah. Probably wasn't
the best comparison.

Nice!

Enrolling himself onto the
course of true love

is Cambridge undergraduate Rudi.

At Cambridge, you can really be
in your own little romcom

and be the Mr Darcy of the day,
you know, walking through

these italianesque, quintessentially
Cambridge Gardens.

That's the life.

It's a shame I'm single.

It's tragic.

That's a determined walk.

Why thank you.

Full power walk going on.

Tell me, you have problems
finding men?

Oh, very much so.

Alas. Yeah, especially in Cambridge.

What, there's no gay people in
Cambridge?

Well, there are. Oh my God,
no, the uni is like 20% gay,

but they're all very immature.

All sex orientated, all about the
hook-up and no...no decent,

kind of, wholesome, substantial,
kind of, relationship material.

Well, listen, you must be dying
to meet your date.

I am. Come with me.
Terrified as well.

Come with me. You don't look it.

I'm looking for a guy who can have
an intellectual conversation

whether about art or literature
or anything.

A cute smile and really nice teeth.

Dark eyes as well.

Hi. Hello. Hello. How are you?

Not too bad thank you. Nice to
meet you. Handshake, hug?

We'll go for the hug. Hug? Go on.
We'll go all out. How are you?

I got you this. Oh, I got
you something too.

Oh! Thank you.

Mine isn't very fancy.

It doesn't need to be. It's fine.

It's a little card. Thank you.

You're welcome.

A candle.

Yeah. I love candles. Thank you.

Sorry, what's your name?

Ashley. Ashley. What's your name?

I'm Rudi. Nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you, Rudi.

So, like, what do you do?

I'm studying to be a teacher.

OK. A primary school teacher. Cool.

So always around little kids.

It's a good thing. Yeah, no,
I've got an absolute ton

of brothers, to say the least.

How many brothers?

Six and one sister. I have nine.

You've got nine? Nine.

Oh, my God, I've been trumped.

My God.

What do you do? I forgot to
ask, sorry.

Oh, so I am an archaeology student
at uni at the minute. Yeah.

Now I just sound like an arse. No!
Not really. No, you don't.

You sound refined.

Thank you. Eloquent.

Oh, eloquent, I like that,
I like that.

PHONE RINGING

I'm so sorry. I'm getting a call
from someone I don't know who...

Oh, it's my dad.

Hi, Dad.

You all right? Yeah.

Hi, Daddy.

Um, yeah, so I'm...I'm busy.

OK.

Talk to you later.

Bye.

He's very different to my
usual type.

I've... I don't... I haven't been
out of anyone like him before.

Well, if you're not going
to have a dessert,

then I won't have a dessert.

OK.

I don't want this to end
yet, though.

She looked great. I was
just very surprised.

It's like, "Oh, you're here for me."

I hope that she enjoyed my
company as much as I did hers.

Do you often dress, like, fancy?

Fancy? No. Cos this is like
a nice look, you know.

I feel like under dressed.

No, you look...you look great.

Hello again. Hey.

Would you like to see
each other again?

You go first.

Oh.

You didn't even wait for that.

Um, yes, I'd like to see
Mercedes again.

Yes.

That's cute.

Do you feel the...?

Do you feel the same?

Yeah, I would like to see you again.
OK.

Do you feel like you know
each other

on quite a deep level now,
would you say?

I mean, I'm autistic so that's
going to take a long time.

I'm neurodivergent too. Are you?

Yes I am, yeah.

Spicy. Yeah.

Spicy brain, yeah.

Because I struggle with change.
I'm not very good with it.

So that's why I need to, like,
investigate, you know,

because you are different from
what I've gone for before.

In a good way. You're not
a criminal. Yeah.

Are you a criminal?

I will never be caught.

No, I'm not a criminal.

It's refreshing that
you're nice to me.

Yeah, without an ulterior motive.

Yeah.

Well, you're a nice person.

Thanks.

Don't ever kiss on the first date.

That's OK. Yeah.

We already talked about,
um, intimacy.

Yeah, that...that can be explored
later if... Come here, though.

Yeah. We'll have a hug.

A nice first date, though.
It is a good first date.

Oh, you've actually got
a fly in your hair.

There we go.

SHE LAUGHS
That's so romantic.

I'm gonna kiss you now.

Do you game?

I do. OK. A Nintendo Switch.

Nintendo. Oh my God, that's fine.
OK. Yeah. Fair, fair.

Yeah. I've never gamed.

I don't know what it's
like properly.

What's your hobbies?

See, I'm going to sound like
a right dullard when I say

like I like reading, I like orcs.

Yeah. My mum and dad basically,
like, banned tech in our house.

Really? Yeah, it was tragic.

I have never had a phone
until age 18.

No laptop, no TV, so I was kind
of forced to go outside.

I remember building little, kind of,
houses out of pine needles

and things in the back garden,
so I filled my time quite well.

But there'll be a lot of references
to things going on in like the 2000s

that I completely don't get,
goes over my over my head

entirely, you know.

Do you know, like Wendy Williams?

No.

What is Wendy Williams?

Wendy Williams is a TV presenter.

OK.

I was gonna make a
Wendy Williams joke.

It can occasionally prove,
uh, difficult in dates.

People definitely judge you.

Oh, my God. Hey. Do you like him?

Um...

Do you know what it is,

he doesn't have, like, social media.

He doesn't, like, he...he
didn't grow up with technology.

There's not a lot of similarities.

Like physically I am
attracted to him.

That's good. I just don't think
we're compatible.

I don't know.

I don't know, I don't know.

So you love birds, how is he going?

Fred, you couldn't have done
a better job.

I mean, incredible.

Fred's over at the table
working his magic.

Yeah, I know. I love Fred.

He's a natural charmer.

You fancy me really.

Yeah, but you can only have
one today.

OK then, Fred, where are we going?

So rude!

So rude.

You can only have him.

Yeah.

Oh, God.

All right, Fred?

Yeah. I mean, I'm just observing
the restaurant.

So many people that we've made
happy.

You've got amazing eyes.

I'm just like staring.

It's the same with yours.

You mesmerise me.

Oh, thank you.

If I pick someone, they have
to be scratching perfect.

Like when you're scratching
the lottery card and

you match two things and
you need one more

and you don't get it, that's fine.

You're like, I was close, but you
want to get near to perfect.

Are you, like, more of a
short-term dater, or, like...?

I go into dating with the mindset
that it'll be long term.

Yeah. What about you, though?

Like, I always have the intention
to date long term. That's nice.

I don't want to be one of
them 60 year olds on Grindr.

Honestly, that is my nightmare.

It's my worst fear.

I cannot...I cannot have that
be me.

When I'm dating someone,
I'm planning to date them,

get married, settle down.

What's your opinions on marriage?
That's an interesting one.

OK. I planned my whole wedding.

Oh my God. Same. OK.

Right, go on. Oh, wait.
No, this isn't good.

No, no, no. Go on.
It depends on how it is.

I want like a woodland theme.

Oh, OK, I like this.

We'll get married in the forest.

They'll be like fairy lights.

And I want a crown and green suits.

What about white suits, though?

Not with my skin tone.

No, no? No, no, no, I can't
wear a white suit.

Yeah, no.

Hello. Hi. How are you doing?

You're not going to believe this.

It's only somebody from
Cheshire Housewives.

Coming up to the bar and
I'm like, "What do you do?"

And she went, "You know what I do."

And I was like, "OK."

Like, I have no idea.

Yeah.

So, yeah. She's amazing.
She's... Yeah.

So I better go just in case
she comes back but...

FRED LAUGHS

She's a handful.

And my challenge is that
I go for girls that

are...that are hard to handle.

And I get the same vibe from
her, right?

Really, really lovely evening.

Fred's super fit.

I think I've got a crush.

What?

I actually think that I really,
really like you as my

new best friend.

Friendzone?

Yeah, I'm gonna friend zone you.

Sometimes the relationships
that have been the best for me

have been friend zone because
you giggle and you talk.

And sex is great but if you
can't giggle and laugh

with somebody first.

I don't even think about that. Sex?

Yeah, it's not even in my mind.

Really? I do.

Do you?

Yeah, I love it.

So would you like to see
each other again?

Do you want me to go first?

Yeah.

Obviously I would. Erm, so yeah,
I mean, I would say obviously

I would love to see you again.

That's... Yeah, I'd love to go on a
second date and see what happened.

Oh, that's so cute.

It was so not what I was expecting.

Really? Yeah.

I think this is the bit that you
then say something rather than...

I'm going to be dead honest.

I think you're such a gorgeous,
gorgeous guy

but I didn't feel a sexual
connection.

I felt a friendship connection.

Obviously, there's a sexual
connection from my side,

but getting to know you has
been awesome.

I'll settle the bill, please.

Thank you.

I think you should have put Chiles
with somebody younger and me

with someone even younger.

Thank you so much.

Thank you. After you.

Is there any advice you could
give to each other?

I think my only advice was probably
not have two double shots

before meeting a date.

And then telling them
you're a stripper.

Cos I had no idea.

Thank you for an amazing night.

Oh, good luck. Take care.

Let me treat you.

No. Yes.

Rock paper scissors.

BOTH: Rock, paper, scissors, shoot.

Then we can split it.
Perfect, perfect.

OK. Fair, fair, fair.

I'd say there was a spark.

Definitely.

Do you think he fancied you?

Oh! That's... I guess that's
the ultimate question

at the end of the day.

I'm being so nosy. What is in
the card there?

Oh, it's really sweet.
It's really sweet.

I'm gonna get so embarrassed now.
No you won't.

It's sweet as anything.

Would you like to see
each other again?

Do you want to go first?

I think I'll...I'll be brave
and go first.

I would like to see Ashley again.

That's good cos I'd like to see
you again too if it's OK. OK.

It works out.
RUDI EXHALES

Thank God. OK, OK, we're good.
Exactly.

OK. Yeah. That's good.

Yeah. We can breathe. We can
breathe. Yeah, yeah.

'To the person I'm sharing
this experience with,

'writing this feels a little
strange at the minute

'since we haven't met yet.

"By the time you read this,
our first date will either

'be over or still going strong.

'I hope it has been what
I imagined it to be.

'Hopefully I get to write more
cards to you in the future.

'From Ash.'

Very sweet.

I thought he was a really,
really sweet guy.

He's clearly very good looking.

Thank you both. Thank you.

Take care. You too. Thank you.
See you. Bye. Nice to meet you.

Do you think he's boyfriend
material?

Yeah, I think he's boyfriend
material.

OK. Yeah? I'm feeling good.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. OK, OK.

# You make my dreams come true

# On a night when bad... #

Where do you want to get married?

Seaside.

Or in Tuscany in Italy. Tuscany?

Ooh. Yeah, where those
big long trees are. Yeah.

# Twist and shout my way out... #

Come on. This is really cute.

# Because I ain't the way
that you found me

# And 'I never be the same

# Oh, now you... #

There you go. Yeah.

# You make my dreams come true

# Well, well, well now

# I know that it's you

# You make my dreams come true

# Oh, now... #

Are you sure you haven't
written him off too soon?

See, that's my problem
I sort of do.

Maybe.

# You make my dreams come true. #

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