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1
00:00:07,975 --> 00:00:09,643
* it's a rare condition *
2
00:00:09,710 --> 00:00:11,279
* in this day and age *
3
00:00:11,345 --> 00:00:14,648
* to read any good news
On the newspaper page *
4
00:00:14,715 --> 00:00:18,652
* and love and tradition
Of the grand design *
5
00:00:18,719 --> 00:00:23,224
* some people say
Is even harder to find *
6
00:00:23,291 --> 00:00:26,360
* well, then, there must be
Some magic clue *
7
00:00:26,427 --> 00:00:30,664
* inside these
Gentle walls *
8
00:00:30,731 --> 00:00:33,734
* 'cause all I see
Is a tower of dreams *
9
00:00:33,801 --> 00:00:38,772
* real love burstin'
Out of every seam *
10
00:00:38,839 --> 00:00:42,310
* as days go by *
11
00:00:42,376 --> 00:00:45,913
* we're gonna fill our
House with happiness *
12
00:00:45,979 --> 00:00:48,449
* the moon may cry *
13
00:00:48,516 --> 00:00:52,720
* we're gonna smother
The blues with tenderness *
14
00:00:52,786 --> 00:00:55,689
* as days go by *
15
00:00:55,756 --> 00:00:59,093
* there's room for
You room for me *
16
00:00:59,160 --> 00:01:03,964
* for gentle hearts
An opportunity *
17
00:01:04,031 --> 00:01:06,400
* as days go by *
18
00:01:06,467 --> 00:01:13,341
* it's the bigger
Love of the family *
19
00:01:23,351 --> 00:01:26,154
Good night.
Come again.
20
00:01:36,230 --> 00:01:38,566
Steve.
21
00:01:38,632 --> 00:01:40,268
Steve, are you here?
22
00:01:41,034 --> 00:01:42,436
What's going on,
Laura?
23
00:01:42,503 --> 00:01:45,873
This was on a table
That was empty
A second ago.
24
00:01:45,939 --> 00:01:49,643
"Farewell, my laura.
By steven q. Urkel."
25
00:01:49,710 --> 00:01:51,445
This must be his entry
26
00:01:51,512 --> 00:01:53,547
In the short-story
Contest.
27
00:01:53,614 --> 00:01:55,416
Yeah. He's deliberately
Being mysterious
28
00:01:55,483 --> 00:01:58,986
To make me want
To read it. Well...
29
00:01:59,052 --> 00:02:00,254
It worked.
30
00:02:03,524 --> 00:02:06,760
[steve]
It all started
On a tuesday.
31
00:02:06,827 --> 00:02:09,197
[saxophone playing]
32
00:02:09,263 --> 00:02:11,532
An ordinary tuesday,
33
00:02:11,599 --> 00:02:15,135
The kind that falls between
Monday and wednesday.
34
00:02:16,370 --> 00:02:19,139
Yep, any way
You look at it,
35
00:02:19,207 --> 00:02:20,841
It was tuesday.
36
00:02:25,513 --> 00:02:26,347
Hey, max.
37
00:02:26,414 --> 00:02:29,617
Put a sock in the sax.
38
00:02:32,052 --> 00:02:34,288
Allow me
To introduce myself.
39
00:02:34,355 --> 00:02:35,923
The name is danger...
40
00:02:35,989 --> 00:02:37,891
Johnny danger.
41
00:02:37,958 --> 00:02:39,660
Former ranger.
42
00:02:39,727 --> 00:02:40,761
And even stranger,
43
00:02:40,828 --> 00:02:44,198
My cousin
Is stewart granger.
44
00:02:48,469 --> 00:02:50,538
I'm a private
Investigator--
45
00:02:50,604 --> 00:02:54,107
A p.I., a shamus,
A sleuth, a gumshoe.
46
00:02:54,174 --> 00:02:56,710
Things were kind of slow.
47
00:02:56,777 --> 00:02:58,246
And then...
48
00:02:59,313 --> 00:03:01,682
[drums beating]
49
00:03:34,682 --> 00:03:35,983
I want to see...
50
00:03:36,049 --> 00:03:37,985
Johnny danger.
51
00:03:39,353 --> 00:03:42,590
And whom the heck
Are you?
52
00:03:45,259 --> 00:03:47,428
Laura wigglesworth.
53
00:03:47,495 --> 00:03:51,031
I'll see
If mr. Danger is in.
54
00:03:51,098 --> 00:03:53,133
[intercom buzzes]
55
00:03:53,200 --> 00:03:54,668
What is it, max?
56
00:03:54,735 --> 00:03:57,271
There's
A miss wigglesworth here.
57
00:03:57,338 --> 00:03:59,907
Oh? Well, just a sec.
58
00:04:08,382 --> 00:04:09,983
Show her in.
59
00:04:14,855 --> 00:04:16,724
[drums beating]
60
00:04:29,637 --> 00:04:32,706
Hey, max.
We may be a while.
61
00:04:32,773 --> 00:04:34,608
Take a long lunch.
62
00:04:34,675 --> 00:04:37,678
Well, when do you
Want me back?
63
00:04:38,879 --> 00:04:40,914
August.
64
00:04:48,422 --> 00:04:51,425
I'm johnny danger.
65
00:04:52,393 --> 00:04:55,729
I'm laura wigglesworth.
66
00:04:55,796 --> 00:05:01,369
I saw right away this laura
Was no ordinary dame.
67
00:05:01,435 --> 00:05:03,971
Silky hair, sultry eyes.
68
00:05:04,037 --> 00:05:06,607
And a pair of legs
That started at her waist
69
00:05:06,674 --> 00:05:09,410
And went all the way
To the ground.
70
00:05:25,393 --> 00:05:26,927
You were saying?
71
00:05:27,828 --> 00:05:30,230
I need your help,
Mr. Danger.
72
00:05:30,297 --> 00:05:33,333
I need it bad.
73
00:05:33,401 --> 00:05:35,369
Real bad.
74
00:05:37,337 --> 00:05:38,839
Desperately.
75
00:05:38,906 --> 00:05:40,374
[gasp]
76
00:05:47,114 --> 00:05:51,251
I'm so frightened.
Someone is trying
To kill my aunt.
77
00:05:51,318 --> 00:05:55,122
I see. What's
Your aunt's name?
78
00:05:55,188 --> 00:05:56,757
Why would anyone
Want to kill her?
79
00:05:56,824 --> 00:05:59,460
Who do you like
In the world series?
80
00:05:59,527 --> 00:06:01,529
Rachel crawfish,
You got me,
81
00:06:01,595 --> 00:06:04,732
And I like the
St. Louis cardinals.
82
00:06:04,798 --> 00:06:07,401
Rachel crawfish?
Why would anyone want
To kill her?
83
00:06:07,468 --> 00:06:09,403
And I like the red sox.
84
00:06:09,470 --> 00:06:11,505
That's right,
I don't know,
85
00:06:11,572 --> 00:06:14,107
And I still
Like the cards.
86
00:06:14,174 --> 00:06:16,677
So, what do you say,
87
00:06:16,744 --> 00:06:18,446
Will you protect
My aunt
88
00:06:18,512 --> 00:06:21,515
And bet 10 bucks
On the series?
89
00:06:22,315 --> 00:06:23,817
You're on...
90
00:06:23,884 --> 00:06:25,385
And you're on.
91
00:06:28,822 --> 00:06:30,891
Good. You start
8:00 tonight
92
00:06:30,958 --> 00:06:34,394
At my aunt's
Restaurant--
Rachel's place.
93
00:06:36,597 --> 00:06:38,799
Don't be late.
94
00:06:38,866 --> 00:06:40,000
[drums beating]
95
00:06:40,067 --> 00:06:41,969
What a woman.
96
00:06:42,035 --> 00:06:44,938
Glitter and glitz
On the outside,
97
00:06:45,005 --> 00:06:46,273
But on the inside...
98
00:06:46,339 --> 00:06:51,679
A hint
Of the girl next door.
99
00:06:51,745 --> 00:06:54,848
But one question
Kept nagging at me...
100
00:06:54,915 --> 00:06:58,452
Where does she hide
Those drums?
101
00:07:03,123 --> 00:07:06,660
* I once fell in love *
102
00:07:06,727 --> 00:07:09,563
* with a guy in the band *
103
00:07:09,630 --> 00:07:11,532
* that man broke my heart *
104
00:07:11,599 --> 00:07:14,367
* but his wife
Broke my hand *
105
00:07:14,434 --> 00:07:17,771
* I'm just
An unlucky star *
106
00:07:17,838 --> 00:07:21,475
* an unlucky star *
107
00:07:21,542 --> 00:07:23,744
* if you wanna ride
To fortune *
108
00:07:23,811 --> 00:07:28,516
* find another car *
109
00:07:35,789 --> 00:07:38,158
Hello, laura.
How did I sound?
110
00:07:38,225 --> 00:07:40,528
Marvelous, as usual.
111
00:07:40,594 --> 00:07:42,696
Rachel
Was a knockout.
112
00:07:42,763 --> 00:07:44,898
And there was
Something else about her,
113
00:07:44,965 --> 00:07:48,636
Something I couldn't quite
Put my finger on.
114
00:07:48,702 --> 00:07:52,540
Who is this sexy man?
115
00:07:55,108 --> 00:07:56,710
Then it came to me.
116
00:07:56,777 --> 00:07:58,546
She had good taste.
117
00:08:01,048 --> 00:08:02,750
This is johnny danger,
118
00:08:02,816 --> 00:08:04,585
The private eye
I told you about.
119
00:08:04,652 --> 00:08:09,289
Oh. My niece
Seems to think
I need protection.
120
00:08:09,356 --> 00:08:11,992
Can you protect me,
Johnny?
121
00:08:12,059 --> 00:08:13,727
Are you kidding?
122
00:08:13,794 --> 00:08:16,764
Why, my middle name's
Turtle wax.
123
00:08:18,198 --> 00:08:21,802
Now, you two
Just go about your
Normal business
124
00:08:21,869 --> 00:08:24,972
While I make myself
Inconspicuous.
125
00:08:25,038 --> 00:08:27,207
For the next
Several hours,
126
00:08:27,274 --> 00:08:28,676
I cased the joint.
127
00:08:28,742 --> 00:08:31,912
It was a hotbed
Of suspicious activity.
128
00:08:32,813 --> 00:08:35,515
Evening,
Mrs. Wigglesworth.
129
00:08:36,349 --> 00:08:37,317
Yeah?
130
00:08:37,384 --> 00:08:39,853
Who says?
131
00:08:39,920 --> 00:08:43,223
Gee, your sister's
Done a great job
With this place.
132
00:08:43,290 --> 00:08:46,126
You think I couldn't?
That's what you're saying?
133
00:08:46,193 --> 00:08:48,228
No!
Yes, you are!
134
00:08:48,295 --> 00:08:51,932
You think I'm nothing,
I'm a nobody. But I'm a person.
135
00:08:51,999 --> 00:08:56,970
I have feelings...
And my original nose.
136
00:08:57,037 --> 00:08:59,707
Gee, I wonder
Who dropped a scorpion
137
00:08:59,773 --> 00:09:01,609
In her girdle.
138
00:09:05,012 --> 00:09:06,213
Hey, mom.
139
00:09:06,279 --> 00:09:09,116
Want to play the numbers?
It only costs $1.00.
140
00:09:09,182 --> 00:09:12,185
Who do I look like?
The bank of harriette?
141
00:09:15,222 --> 00:09:17,157
Excuse me.
142
00:09:17,224 --> 00:09:20,493
You wouldn't happen
To be laura's brother?
143
00:09:20,560 --> 00:09:24,064
I hope so.
I'm wearing his underwear.
144
00:09:28,168 --> 00:09:30,070
Mr. Danger.
145
00:09:30,137 --> 00:09:32,239
Officer wigglesworth.
146
00:09:41,381 --> 00:09:43,651
What do you want here?
147
00:09:43,717 --> 00:09:47,655
The fried chicken
And a side
Of information.
148
00:09:48,488 --> 00:09:50,257
I don't like you,
Danger,
149
00:09:50,323 --> 00:09:53,927
Because wherever you go
Trouble is sure to follow.
150
00:09:53,994 --> 00:09:54,962
You follow?
151
00:09:55,028 --> 00:09:56,296
I follow.
152
00:09:56,363 --> 00:09:59,599
Remember, we're
On the same side
Of the law.
153
00:09:59,667 --> 00:10:01,869
There's room for you
And there's room for me.
154
00:10:01,935 --> 00:10:03,771
Although, let's be
Quite honest.
155
00:10:03,837 --> 00:10:08,642
You take up
A lot more room
Than me.
156
00:10:08,709 --> 00:10:11,044
Heh heh heh.
157
00:10:11,111 --> 00:10:13,346
[drums beating]
158
00:10:18,418 --> 00:10:19,687
Laura!
159
00:10:21,889 --> 00:10:24,357
Hello, johnny.
160
00:10:24,424 --> 00:10:26,626
[drums beating]
161
00:10:29,863 --> 00:10:31,965
Care to wet
Your whistle?
162
00:10:32,032 --> 00:10:33,734
Why not?
163
00:10:36,336 --> 00:10:38,605
You do know
How to whistle,
Don't you?
164
00:10:38,672 --> 00:10:40,007
Oh, sure.
165
00:10:40,073 --> 00:10:43,610
You just put your lips
Together and go...
166
00:10:43,677 --> 00:10:45,713
Pfft!
167
00:10:52,552 --> 00:10:54,321
See you later,
Big boy.
168
00:10:54,387 --> 00:10:56,690
[drums beating]
169
00:11:00,260 --> 00:11:02,996
Laura had a half nelson
On my heart.
170
00:11:03,063 --> 00:11:05,799
My pulse was racing.
My head was pounding.
171
00:11:05,866 --> 00:11:07,735
The room was spinning.
172
00:11:10,137 --> 00:11:13,006
Then I realized...
This wasn't love.
173
00:11:13,073 --> 00:11:15,943
Somebody had slipped me
A mickey!
174
00:11:18,078 --> 00:11:19,146
Hey, lady!
175
00:11:19,212 --> 00:11:20,313
Aah! Oh!
176
00:11:22,415 --> 00:11:24,184
Agghh!
177
00:11:29,489 --> 00:11:32,125
[snorting]
178
00:11:36,663 --> 00:11:38,365
When I came to,
179
00:11:38,431 --> 00:11:40,033
I felt like orson welles
180
00:11:40,100 --> 00:11:43,703
Had been tap-dancing
On my head.
181
00:11:44,637 --> 00:11:47,207
Rachel. Oh.
182
00:11:47,274 --> 00:11:49,409
What time is it?
183
00:11:49,476 --> 00:11:52,479
How long
Have I been out?
184
00:11:52,545 --> 00:11:54,114
Rachel.
185
00:11:59,820 --> 00:12:01,922
Extra! Extra!
Read all about it!
186
00:12:01,989 --> 00:12:05,425
Rachel crawfish found
Stabbed to death!
187
00:12:17,170 --> 00:12:22,075
One week later,
On a dark and stormy night,
188
00:12:22,142 --> 00:12:25,846
I gathered everybody
At the wigglesworth house.
189
00:12:25,913 --> 00:12:28,348
[thunder]
190
00:12:32,853 --> 00:12:34,855
Mr. Danger,
191
00:12:34,922 --> 00:12:38,558
It's a dark
And stormy night.
192
00:12:38,625 --> 00:12:42,996
Why have you
Gathered us here at
The wigglesworth house?
193
00:12:43,063 --> 00:12:46,399
Because you all
Had two things
In common.
194
00:12:46,466 --> 00:12:47,767
And what's that?
195
00:12:47,835 --> 00:12:49,837
You all knew
Rachel crawfish,
196
00:12:49,903 --> 00:12:52,105
And you all had
Reason to kill her.
197
00:12:56,543 --> 00:12:58,278
You're way
Off base here.
198
00:12:58,345 --> 00:12:59,847
Rachel was loved.
199
00:12:59,913 --> 00:13:02,082
Is that so?
200
00:13:02,149 --> 00:13:06,686
Well, how did you
Feel about rachel...
201
00:13:06,753 --> 00:13:09,356
Harriette?
202
00:13:09,422 --> 00:13:11,691
Hey. She was my sister.
203
00:13:11,758 --> 00:13:13,894
I, uh...
204
00:13:13,961 --> 00:13:16,129
Sort of loved her.
205
00:13:21,134 --> 00:13:23,837
You were jealous
Of rachel.
206
00:13:23,904 --> 00:13:26,106
After all, you
Did loan her
The money
207
00:13:26,173 --> 00:13:28,141
To start
Rachel's place.
208
00:13:28,208 --> 00:13:32,379
But then
Rachel became
Rich and famous.
209
00:13:32,445 --> 00:13:34,747
And what
Did you get?
210
00:13:34,814 --> 00:13:35,983
A chip
On your shoulder
211
00:13:36,049 --> 00:13:39,052
The size
Of an aircraft
Carrier.
212
00:13:43,023 --> 00:13:44,424
What are you saying,
Gumshoe?
213
00:13:44,491 --> 00:13:46,693
I'm saying
You killed
Your own sister!
214
00:13:46,759 --> 00:13:48,461
[thunder]
215
00:13:48,528 --> 00:13:50,230
[gunshot]
216
00:13:54,101 --> 00:13:57,204
On second thought,
It wasn't harriette.
217
00:14:02,742 --> 00:14:04,244
Was it, eddie?
218
00:14:04,311 --> 00:14:05,645
Uh, what?
219
00:14:05,712 --> 00:14:06,880
That's right.
220
00:14:06,947 --> 00:14:08,381
You were
Running numbers,
221
00:14:08,448 --> 00:14:11,151
And rachel found out
About it, didn't she?
222
00:14:13,820 --> 00:14:16,089
I was doing
All the work,
223
00:14:16,156 --> 00:14:18,926
And she wanted 80%.
It wasn't fair.
224
00:14:18,992 --> 00:14:21,995
No, it wasn't,
But you didn't
Have to kill her!
225
00:14:22,062 --> 00:14:23,630
[thunder]
226
00:14:23,696 --> 00:14:25,532
[gunshot]
227
00:14:34,007 --> 00:14:36,576
And which, of course,
You didn't.
228
00:14:39,246 --> 00:14:44,217
Wait a minute.
Every time he accuses
Somebody, they die.
229
00:14:44,284 --> 00:14:46,186
Which brings me
To you.
230
00:14:46,253 --> 00:14:47,220
No!
231
00:14:54,161 --> 00:14:57,197
Not so fast,
Flatfoot.
232
00:14:57,264 --> 00:14:59,899
You're going to make
Headlines again.
233
00:14:59,967 --> 00:15:01,134
What are you
Talking about?
234
00:15:01,201 --> 00:15:02,335
You were being investigated
235
00:15:02,402 --> 00:15:05,305
For running a citywide
Extortion scheme.
236
00:15:05,372 --> 00:15:09,576
If a business didn't pay,
They met with an accident.
237
00:15:09,642 --> 00:15:10,978
Rachel was
Making millions.
238
00:15:11,044 --> 00:15:13,480
It wouldn't
Have killed her
To share the wealth.
239
00:15:13,546 --> 00:15:16,383
You killed her
Because she didn't
Share the wealth!
240
00:15:16,449 --> 00:15:18,285
[thunder]
241
00:15:18,351 --> 00:15:19,619
[gunshot]
242
00:15:23,390 --> 00:15:24,691
You know..
243
00:15:27,227 --> 00:15:28,561
Whoever's doing this
244
00:15:28,628 --> 00:15:32,632
Just might want to wait
Until I'm finished.
245
00:15:32,699 --> 00:15:34,334
This is crazy!
246
00:15:34,401 --> 00:15:36,103
[drums beating]
247
00:15:37,170 --> 00:15:39,006
Laura! Sit back down.
248
00:15:39,072 --> 00:15:42,042
I can't think
With those drums.
249
00:15:51,418 --> 00:15:52,585
Estelle.
250
00:15:52,652 --> 00:15:53,620
Yes, sugar?
251
00:15:56,056 --> 00:15:59,092
You mentioned earlier
That rachel was loved.
252
00:15:59,159 --> 00:16:00,660
Did you love her?
253
00:16:00,727 --> 00:16:02,562
No, I didn't.
254
00:16:02,629 --> 00:16:03,830
Rachel was a hussy.
255
00:16:03,896 --> 00:16:05,965
She stole my man.
256
00:16:06,033 --> 00:16:08,201
- judge jenkins?
- that's right.
257
00:16:08,268 --> 00:16:11,638
And she convinced
Him to put me
In a rest home.
258
00:16:18,945 --> 00:16:21,381
Ah, I see.
259
00:16:21,448 --> 00:16:24,751
So not only would rachel
Have your man,
260
00:16:24,817 --> 00:16:26,519
But she would
Have your money.
261
00:16:26,586 --> 00:16:30,423
Now listen, I admit I had
Harsh words with rachel,
262
00:16:30,490 --> 00:16:33,193
But I swear
I didn't kill her.
263
00:16:33,260 --> 00:16:35,928
I didn't kill her!
264
00:16:35,995 --> 00:16:37,830
Oh, estelle...
265
00:16:37,897 --> 00:16:40,100
If we could
Only believe you.
266
00:16:40,167 --> 00:16:41,801
[thunder]
267
00:16:41,868 --> 00:16:43,336
[gunshot]
268
00:16:47,907 --> 00:16:50,477
And we do believe
You, estelle.
269
00:16:50,543 --> 00:16:53,413
We really do.
270
00:16:55,715 --> 00:16:58,085
Chef waldo..
271
00:16:58,151 --> 00:17:00,053
Tell me...
272
00:17:00,120 --> 00:17:03,323
Does this contract
Look familiar to you?
273
00:17:09,696 --> 00:17:12,599
Yeah. I sign it when rachel
Bring me to america.
274
00:17:15,268 --> 00:17:17,204
Were you aware
When you signed it
275
00:17:17,270 --> 00:17:19,972
That it was
A lifetime contract?
276
00:17:20,039 --> 00:17:23,076
No! For seven long years,
277
00:17:23,143 --> 00:17:26,613
I baste, I stuff,
And I fricassee for her.
278
00:17:26,679 --> 00:17:28,115
And I ask her,
279
00:17:28,181 --> 00:17:33,052
Letta me start
Me own ristorante.
But she say no!
280
00:17:34,954 --> 00:17:38,391
You have a little
Drool right here.
281
00:17:41,194 --> 00:17:43,396
Oh. Thank you
Very much.
282
00:17:44,897 --> 00:17:49,102
So, rachel destroyed
Your dream,
283
00:17:49,169 --> 00:17:52,004
And thatsa why
You killed her.
284
00:17:52,071 --> 00:17:53,606
[thunder]
285
00:17:53,673 --> 00:17:55,308
[gunshot]
286
00:18:00,647 --> 00:18:03,650
Gee. I would've
Bet money
On that one.
287
00:18:05,618 --> 00:18:07,387
So...
288
00:18:11,291 --> 00:18:15,495
Wigglesworth, it all
Comes down to you.
289
00:18:15,562 --> 00:18:17,630
Ha. I didn't
Kill anybody.
290
00:18:17,697 --> 00:18:19,098
Oh, really?
291
00:18:19,166 --> 00:18:20,467
Murtagh ordered you
292
00:18:20,533 --> 00:18:22,669
To collect the extortion
Money from rachel.
293
00:18:22,735 --> 00:18:25,572
Not only did she refuse,
294
00:18:25,638 --> 00:18:28,475
She showed you this!
295
00:18:34,046 --> 00:18:35,182
What's that?
296
00:18:35,248 --> 00:18:36,683
Rachel
Secretly recorded
297
00:18:36,749 --> 00:18:38,651
Your father's
Demand for money.
298
00:18:38,718 --> 00:18:42,121
Isn't that right,
Officer wigglesworth?
299
00:18:42,189 --> 00:18:45,091
Well, she was going
To leak it to the press.
300
00:18:45,158 --> 00:18:46,759
My career
Would've been ruined.
301
00:18:46,826 --> 00:18:48,228
And so
You killed her!
302
00:18:48,295 --> 00:18:50,163
[thunder]
303
00:18:50,230 --> 00:18:51,231
No!
304
00:18:51,298 --> 00:18:53,132
[gunshot]
305
00:18:56,936 --> 00:18:59,572
Laura,
I knew it was you!
306
00:19:01,941 --> 00:19:06,346
You did?
Then why'd you let me
Shoot all these people?
307
00:19:06,413 --> 00:19:09,382
I wanted to make you
Sweat a little.
308
00:19:10,850 --> 00:19:13,586
Well, now it's your turn,
Johnny danger.
309
00:19:13,653 --> 00:19:15,788
Your turn to die.
310
00:19:15,855 --> 00:19:19,526
There I was, face to face
With lady death.
311
00:19:19,592 --> 00:19:22,195
Was I about
To take the long nap,
312
00:19:22,262 --> 00:19:24,030
The siesta grande,
313
00:19:24,096 --> 00:19:25,932
The eternal snooze,
314
00:19:25,998 --> 00:19:28,735
The hasta la bye-bye?
315
00:19:30,069 --> 00:19:32,004
Well, what are you
Waiting for?
316
00:19:32,071 --> 00:19:34,407
The narration to finish.
317
00:19:43,783 --> 00:19:45,785
You're a strong woman.
318
00:19:47,520 --> 00:19:49,489
Alright, johnny,
You've got me.
319
00:19:49,556 --> 00:19:50,957
I killed
My aunt rachel.
320
00:19:51,023 --> 00:19:52,592
But why?
321
00:19:52,659 --> 00:19:54,427
[drums beating]
322
00:19:59,799 --> 00:20:01,634
I wanted to inherit
The supper club.
323
00:20:01,701 --> 00:20:03,470
I killed the rest
Of the family
324
00:20:03,536 --> 00:20:05,772
Because I was
Last in line.
325
00:20:06,973 --> 00:20:08,741
Oh...
326
00:20:08,808 --> 00:20:11,811
Oh, you're cold, baby.
327
00:20:11,878 --> 00:20:14,414
Cold...And irresistible.
328
00:20:16,182 --> 00:20:17,384
What are you saying?
329
00:20:17,450 --> 00:20:20,387
I'm saying I'm crazy
About you, kid.
330
00:20:20,453 --> 00:20:21,888
You're under my skin.
331
00:20:21,954 --> 00:20:24,156
I know you're poison,
But I've been bitten,
332
00:20:24,223 --> 00:20:27,460
And I don't
Have an antidote.
333
00:20:28,795 --> 00:20:32,399
So...You're going
To let me go?
334
00:20:32,465 --> 00:20:34,701
I'm giving you
A choice.
335
00:20:34,767 --> 00:20:35,802
We can run away
336
00:20:35,868 --> 00:20:38,805
And spend the rest
Of our lives
Together...
337
00:20:38,871 --> 00:20:40,172
Or...
338
00:20:40,239 --> 00:20:42,409
You can go to jail.
339
00:20:49,849 --> 00:20:51,418
Chicago police?
340
00:20:53,620 --> 00:20:55,888
I've just killed
Seven people.
341
00:21:04,030 --> 00:21:05,932
And so...
342
00:21:05,998 --> 00:21:07,166
It ended.
343
00:21:07,233 --> 00:21:09,469
The cops
Took laura away,
344
00:21:09,536 --> 00:21:11,571
And I never saw her again.
345
00:21:11,638 --> 00:21:14,841
But every time the cards
Play the bosox,
346
00:21:14,907 --> 00:21:18,244
I bow my head
And shed a tear
347
00:21:18,311 --> 00:21:22,081
For the lovely
Laura wigglesworth.
348
00:21:22,148 --> 00:21:25,485
So, ladies,
What did you think?
349
00:21:25,552 --> 00:21:27,554
- actually, I liked it.
- so did I.
350
00:21:27,620 --> 00:21:30,222
I hope you win
That writing contest.
351
00:21:30,289 --> 00:21:32,659
Come on, you two, it's late.
Let's go home.
352
00:21:36,262 --> 00:21:39,432
* I'm just
An unlucky star *
353
00:21:39,499 --> 00:21:42,702
* an unlucky star *
354
00:21:43,536 --> 00:21:46,639
Steve,
You wrote the story.
355
00:21:46,706 --> 00:21:49,742
Why didn't you have johnny
End up with laura?
356
00:21:49,809 --> 00:21:50,877
Well...
357
00:21:50,943 --> 00:21:52,379
Simple, sweetheart.
358
00:21:52,445 --> 00:21:55,448
I'm saving that ending
For real life.
23792
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