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00:00:02,569 --> 00:00:04,069
In the last episode of Soap,
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00:00:04,070 --> 00:00:06,071
much to Detective Donohue'ssurprise,
3
00:00:06,072 --> 00:00:08,073
Jessica decidedto have an affair with him,
4
00:00:08,074 --> 00:00:10,576
and the next morning,much to everyone's surprise,
5
00:00:10,577 --> 00:00:12,578
Chester returned home.
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00:00:12,579 --> 00:00:14,079
Sally was surprised
7
00:00:14,080 --> 00:00:15,581
when Burt showed upat her apartment
8
00:00:15,582 --> 00:00:17,583
to find out why she toldthose surprising stories
9
00:00:17,584 --> 00:00:19,084
about him,
10
00:00:19,085 --> 00:00:21,086
and Burt was surprisedto find out
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00:00:21,087 --> 00:00:24,590
it was because Ingrid Swensonwas blackmailing her.
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00:00:24,591 --> 00:00:27,092
Corinne came homewith her beautiful healthy baby
13
00:00:27,093 --> 00:00:28,594
that she had
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00:00:28,595 --> 00:00:30,095
after a surprisingly shortpregnancy.
15
00:00:30,096 --> 00:00:32,097
Tim hasn't been surprisedwith the news yet,
16
00:00:32,098 --> 00:00:33,599
since he's now living in a cave.
17
00:00:33,600 --> 00:00:35,100
Surprised?
18
00:00:35,101 --> 00:00:38,104
You won't be aftertonight's episode of... Soap.
19
00:00:43,109 --> 00:00:45,110
This is the storyof two sisters,
20
00:00:45,111 --> 00:00:47,613
Jessica Tate
21
00:00:47,614 --> 00:00:50,115
and Mary Campbell.
22
00:00:50,116 --> 00:00:53,619
These are the Tates,
23
00:00:53,620 --> 00:00:57,122
and these are the Campbells.
24
00:00:57,123 --> 00:00:59,125
And this is Soap.
25
00:01:41,167 --> 00:01:43,669
He's washing up
and getting settled in.
26
00:01:43,670 --> 00:01:45,170
What's gonna happen with us?
27
00:01:45,171 --> 00:01:46,672
I don't know.
28
00:01:46,673 --> 00:01:48,173
I mean, just a few hours ago,
29
00:01:48,174 --> 00:01:49,174
we were discussing marriage.
30
00:01:49,175 --> 00:01:51,677
Well, I wasn't married then.
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00:01:54,681 --> 00:01:55,681
Do you love him?
32
00:01:55,682 --> 00:01:56,682
Yes.
33
00:01:56,683 --> 00:01:57,683
See you.
34
00:01:57,684 --> 00:01:59,686
I love you too.
35
00:02:02,188 --> 00:02:04,189
I loved him first.
36
00:02:04,190 --> 00:02:05,190
Do you love him most?
37
00:02:05,191 --> 00:02:06,191
I loved him longest.
38
00:02:06,192 --> 00:02:07,192
You didn't love him lately.
39
00:02:07,193 --> 00:02:08,694
I love you both.
40
00:02:08,695 --> 00:02:11,196
I'd love to clean
the living room.
41
00:02:11,197 --> 00:02:13,199
Benson...
42
00:02:21,708 --> 00:02:23,709
I love you.
43
00:02:23,710 --> 00:02:25,712
Really, I do...
44
00:02:27,714 --> 00:02:29,716
But Chester's my husband.
45
00:02:31,217 --> 00:02:32,217
It's funny.
46
00:02:32,218 --> 00:02:33,719
You hired me to find him.
47
00:02:33,720 --> 00:02:35,221
I didn't.
48
00:02:37,724 --> 00:02:39,225
I found you.
49
00:02:57,744 --> 00:02:59,244
JESSICA:
Chester...
50
00:02:59,245 --> 00:03:01,246
In here.
51
00:03:01,247 --> 00:03:02,247
Chester, I wanted to talk...
52
00:03:02,248 --> 00:03:03,749
Oh, I'm so sorry.
53
00:03:03,750 --> 00:03:05,751
I didn't know
you were in the bath.
54
00:03:05,752 --> 00:03:07,252
Jess, come on in.
55
00:03:07,253 --> 00:03:11,256
No, thank you, Chester,
I bathed this morning.
56
00:03:11,257 --> 00:03:13,258
No,
I meant come in the bathroom.
57
00:03:13,259 --> 00:03:14,259
Oh.
58
00:03:14,260 --> 00:03:15,761
Well, we could talk later.
59
00:03:15,762 --> 00:03:19,264
No, come on, Jess,
I've missed talking to you.
60
00:03:19,265 --> 00:03:21,767
Oh.
61
00:03:21,768 --> 00:03:24,269
Well...
62
00:03:24,270 --> 00:03:25,771
How are you, Chester?
63
00:03:25,772 --> 00:03:30,275
Oh, Jess, you have no idea
what I went through.
64
00:03:30,276 --> 00:03:32,277
It was awful, just awful.
65
00:03:32,278 --> 00:03:34,279
Oh, Chester.
66
00:03:34,280 --> 00:03:36,782
But let's not talk about that.
Let's talk about happy things.
67
00:03:36,783 --> 00:03:37,943
What did you want to tell me?
68
00:03:40,787 --> 00:03:43,288
I thought you were dead,
Chester.
69
00:03:43,289 --> 00:03:46,792
Well...
I... I know you did, Jess.
70
00:03:46,793 --> 00:03:48,794
Everyone thought you were dead.
Chester.
71
00:03:48,795 --> 00:03:51,296
Is that what you wanted
to tell me?
72
00:03:51,297 --> 00:03:54,299
Well, that's part of it.
73
00:03:54,300 --> 00:03:56,301
You... You... You see, Chester,
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00:03:56,302 --> 00:03:59,305
we all thought you were dead...
75
00:04:01,307 --> 00:04:04,810
And, well, I mean, you know,
when you think a person is dead,
76
00:04:04,811 --> 00:04:07,312
then you start doing things
as if they are not there,
77
00:04:07,313 --> 00:04:10,816
which of course, being dead,
they are not.
78
00:04:10,817 --> 00:04:12,818
Yes?
79
00:04:12,819 --> 00:04:14,821
And so...
80
00:04:16,322 --> 00:04:18,323
I... I thought you were dead,
81
00:04:18,324 --> 00:04:25,831
and I did things that you do
after your husband dies.
82
00:04:25,832 --> 00:04:26,832
Like what?
83
00:04:26,833 --> 00:04:28,835
Like...
84
00:04:33,339 --> 00:04:35,340
Have a funeral.
85
00:04:35,341 --> 00:04:37,843
Oh, that's nice.
86
00:04:37,844 --> 00:04:38,844
Who came?
87
00:04:38,845 --> 00:04:41,347
Nobody. They all had headaches.
88
00:04:44,851 --> 00:04:45,851
And?
89
00:04:45,852 --> 00:04:47,352
And what?
90
00:04:47,353 --> 00:04:48,854
And what were you going
to tell me?
91
00:04:48,855 --> 00:04:51,857
Oh, uh... nothing.
92
00:04:51,858 --> 00:04:53,358
Oh, come on, you silly.
93
00:04:53,359 --> 00:04:54,359
You're acting
94
00:04:54,360 --> 00:04:55,861
like it's the most
terrible thing
95
00:04:55,862 --> 00:04:56,862
in the world.
96
00:04:56,863 --> 00:04:58,864
How terrible could it be?
97
00:05:00,867 --> 00:05:01,867
Terrible.
98
00:05:01,868 --> 00:05:02,868
Oh, well,
99
00:05:02,869 --> 00:05:04,870
it's not as if you're going
to tell me
100
00:05:04,871 --> 00:05:06,372
that you took up
with another man.
101
00:05:08,875 --> 00:05:11,376
Oh, come on, Jess.
102
00:05:11,377 --> 00:05:13,378
The only thing
that could be so awful
103
00:05:13,379 --> 00:05:14,880
is if you gave away
all my clothes,
104
00:05:14,881 --> 00:05:16,381
or you took up with another man.
105
00:05:16,382 --> 00:05:17,883
Both.
106
00:05:19,886 --> 00:05:21,887
You gave away all my clothes?
107
00:05:21,888 --> 00:05:24,390
Oh, Chester.
108
00:05:25,892 --> 00:05:28,895
You were joking
about the affair, weren't you?
109
00:05:30,897 --> 00:05:31,897
No, Chester.
110
00:05:31,898 --> 00:05:33,900
You had an affair?
111
00:05:36,402 --> 00:05:38,403
Oh, Jess, how could you?
112
00:05:38,404 --> 00:05:42,407
I thought
you were dead, Chester,
113
00:05:42,408 --> 00:05:44,409
and, well, of course,
it's not true,
114
00:05:44,410 --> 00:05:46,411
because, I mean, here you are,
and you're not,
115
00:05:46,412 --> 00:05:48,413
but I didn't know it.
116
00:05:48,414 --> 00:05:50,415
Who was he?
117
00:05:50,416 --> 00:05:53,418
Well... it's not important.
118
00:05:53,419 --> 00:05:55,420
I have a right to know, Jess.
I'm your husband.
119
00:05:55,421 --> 00:05:57,923
Detective Donohue.
120
00:05:57,924 --> 00:05:59,425
What?
121
00:06:01,928 --> 00:06:03,929
Detective Donohue.
122
00:06:03,930 --> 00:06:04,931
Detective Donohue?
123
00:06:10,436 --> 00:06:11,937
The silly-looking little guy?
124
00:06:16,943 --> 00:06:19,444
He happens to be wonderful.
125
00:06:19,445 --> 00:06:21,947
I'm sure he is, Jess.
126
00:06:21,948 --> 00:06:23,949
I'm sure he is.
127
00:06:23,950 --> 00:06:26,451
Oh, Chester.
128
00:06:26,452 --> 00:06:29,955
I'm sorry, Jess.
129
00:06:29,956 --> 00:06:33,959
I'm just relieved that it's him.
130
00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:36,462
For a second there,
I was really worried.
131
00:06:39,966 --> 00:06:41,967
I just wouldn't want
to lose you, Jess,
132
00:06:41,968 --> 00:06:43,469
that's all.
133
00:07:02,989 --> 00:07:05,490
Hi, Billy.
134
00:07:13,499 --> 00:07:14,499
I don't believe it.
135
00:07:14,500 --> 00:07:16,001
Lisa, hi.
How's everything?
136
00:07:16,002 --> 00:07:17,502
Sit down.
How are you?
137
00:07:17,503 --> 00:07:20,005
I'm fine. I'm great.
138
00:07:20,006 --> 00:07:21,506
I've been far, far away.
139
00:07:21,507 --> 00:07:23,008
When you stopped
coming to school last year,
140
00:07:23,009 --> 00:07:24,009
I figured you moved.
141
00:07:24,010 --> 00:07:25,510
I did.
142
00:07:25,511 --> 00:07:26,511
You look terrific.
143
00:07:26,512 --> 00:07:28,013
You look terrible.
144
00:07:28,014 --> 00:07:29,514
Thanks. Hey, this is incredible.
145
00:07:29,515 --> 00:07:31,516
You want a Coke,
fries, carrot cake?
146
00:07:31,517 --> 00:07:32,517
I look terrible?
147
00:07:32,518 --> 00:07:33,518
You look sad.
148
00:07:33,519 --> 00:07:35,020
Sad? I'm hysterical.
149
00:07:35,021 --> 00:07:36,521
Seeing you again is great.
150
00:07:36,522 --> 00:07:37,522
What do you mean,
I look terrible?
151
00:07:37,523 --> 00:07:40,025
Well, you used to look nervous
and happy.
152
00:07:40,026 --> 00:07:42,027
Now you look nervous and sad.
153
00:07:42,028 --> 00:07:44,529
No, that's because
whenever you saw me,
154
00:07:44,530 --> 00:07:45,530
I was nervous around you,
155
00:07:45,531 --> 00:07:47,532
I'd drop things, stutter,
and fall down a lot.
156
00:07:47,533 --> 00:07:49,034
You don't do that anymore?
157
00:07:49,035 --> 00:07:50,536
No.
158
00:07:53,539 --> 00:07:56,541
So you moved.
159
00:07:56,542 --> 00:07:57,542
Yes.
160
00:07:57,543 --> 00:07:58,543
Where to?
161
00:07:58,544 --> 00:08:01,046
Utopic Euphoria.
162
00:08:03,049 --> 00:08:05,050
Let me get a pen.
163
00:08:05,051 --> 00:08:06,051
No, Billy,
164
00:08:06,052 --> 00:08:08,053
Billy, I moved to another plane,
165
00:08:08,054 --> 00:08:09,054
another dimension.
166
00:08:09,055 --> 00:08:11,057
Here, here's my address.
167
00:08:15,061 --> 00:08:17,562
You sure
you don't want anything to eat?
168
00:08:17,563 --> 00:08:19,565
Thanks, no.
169
00:08:21,067 --> 00:08:24,569
"The Church of the Golden Ray.
170
00:08:24,570 --> 00:08:28,073
Reverend Sun Ray Sun, founder."
171
00:08:28,074 --> 00:08:30,076
I'm a Sunny.
172
00:08:36,582 --> 00:08:37,582
Oh?
173
00:08:37,583 --> 00:08:40,585
Hey, why don't you come with me.
174
00:08:40,586 --> 00:08:44,089
You could see the church,
understand our way of life.
175
00:08:44,090 --> 00:08:45,590
No, I have a class
in 10 minutes.
176
00:08:45,591 --> 00:08:47,592
Don't you have a class to go to?
177
00:08:47,593 --> 00:08:49,594
Oh, my life is a class.
178
00:08:49,595 --> 00:08:50,595
I've thought of you often,
179
00:08:50,596 --> 00:08:52,597
Billy.
180
00:08:52,598 --> 00:08:54,599
I never even knew
you thought I was alive.
181
00:08:54,600 --> 00:08:57,602
Well, that's because
I was in another world,
182
00:08:57,603 --> 00:09:00,105
but now,
I'm in Reverend Sun's world.
183
00:09:00,106 --> 00:09:01,106
I love it.
184
00:09:01,107 --> 00:09:03,608
I love everything. I love you.
185
00:09:03,609 --> 00:09:05,610
Me?
186
00:09:05,611 --> 00:09:07,612
All things.
187
00:09:07,613 --> 00:09:11,116
Sunnys know how to love
and feel.
188
00:09:11,117 --> 00:09:13,118
You seem so troubled.
189
00:09:13,119 --> 00:09:14,119
I am...
190
00:09:14,120 --> 00:09:15,620
sort of.
191
00:09:15,621 --> 00:09:17,122
I just don't have anyone
to talk to,
192
00:09:17,123 --> 00:09:18,623
anyone who'll listen to me.
193
00:09:18,624 --> 00:09:19,624
I mean, my parents will.
194
00:09:19,625 --> 00:09:21,126
They sort of have
their own problems,
195
00:09:21,127 --> 00:09:22,627
and I don't want to add to them.
196
00:09:22,628 --> 00:09:25,630
The Sunny will listen, Billy.
I'll listen.
197
00:09:25,631 --> 00:09:27,132
You will.
198
00:09:27,133 --> 00:09:28,633
Come.
199
00:09:28,634 --> 00:09:29,634
Come with me.
200
00:09:29,635 --> 00:09:30,635
But I have a class...
201
00:09:30,636 --> 00:09:31,636
I love you.
202
00:09:31,637 --> 00:09:33,138
That I can make up tomorrow.
203
00:09:45,651 --> 00:09:46,651
Three minutes.
204
00:09:46,652 --> 00:09:48,153
Don't put your fingers
on the glass.
205
00:09:48,154 --> 00:09:50,155
Glass?
206
00:09:50,156 --> 00:09:51,156
Look at this.
207
00:09:51,157 --> 00:09:52,157
Oh.
208
00:09:53,159 --> 00:09:54,659
I am sorry.
209
00:09:54,660 --> 00:09:56,161
She's sorry.
210
00:09:56,162 --> 00:09:57,162
Why is there glass?
211
00:09:57,163 --> 00:09:59,164
Because if it was brick,
212
00:09:59,165 --> 00:10:00,666
it'd hardly be worth the trip.
213
00:10:04,170 --> 00:10:06,171
Uh-huh,
and why can't I touch the glass?
214
00:10:06,172 --> 00:10:07,672
Might I get a shock?
215
00:10:07,673 --> 00:10:09,174
No, I get a smudge.
216
00:10:10,676 --> 00:10:11,676
Lady, you've got any idea
217
00:10:11,677 --> 00:10:13,678
how many times a day
I gotta clean this?
218
00:10:13,679 --> 00:10:16,181
I'm sure I don't care.
219
00:10:16,182 --> 00:10:18,683
You've now got
two-and-a-half minutes.
220
00:10:18,684 --> 00:10:20,185
No smoking, no swearing,
no spitting.
221
00:10:20,186 --> 00:10:24,190
I never spit. I don't spit.
I live in Connecticut.
222
00:10:27,193 --> 00:10:29,694
Dutch, oh, Dutch,
223
00:10:29,695 --> 00:10:32,197
oh, my God, look what
they've done to you.
224
00:10:33,199 --> 00:10:36,201
I said...
225
00:10:36,202 --> 00:10:39,704
My God, look
what they've done to you!
226
00:10:39,705 --> 00:10:41,706
I said, My God, look what...
227
00:10:41,707 --> 00:10:42,707
Lady, please,
228
00:10:42,708 --> 00:10:45,710
you're gonna wake up
the whole prison.
229
00:10:45,711 --> 00:10:47,212
Lady, pick up the phone.
230
00:10:47,213 --> 00:10:49,214
Phone?
231
00:10:49,215 --> 00:10:50,715
I have to talk to him
on the phone?
232
00:10:50,716 --> 00:10:52,717
No, you could
sit there and holler
233
00:10:52,718 --> 00:10:53,718
and annoy everybody,
234
00:10:53,719 --> 00:10:55,220
or you could pick up the phone
235
00:10:55,221 --> 00:10:56,221
like a person
236
00:10:56,222 --> 00:10:57,223
and talk nice.
237
00:11:01,227 --> 00:11:02,227
Dutch.
238
00:11:02,228 --> 00:11:03,228
Eunice.
239
00:11:03,229 --> 00:11:04,729
Dutch, oh, Dutch.
240
00:11:04,730 --> 00:11:07,232
Oh, my God,
look what they've done to you.
241
00:11:09,235 --> 00:11:10,235
What?
242
00:11:10,236 --> 00:11:12,737
Behind glass.
243
00:11:12,738 --> 00:11:14,239
My Dutch, behind glass.
244
00:11:14,240 --> 00:11:16,241
Dirty screws!
245
00:11:16,242 --> 00:11:19,244
Eunice, please, relax, honey.
246
00:11:19,245 --> 00:11:20,245
Relax?
247
00:11:20,246 --> 00:11:22,247
My man is being treated
like an animal,
248
00:11:22,248 --> 00:11:23,748
and you want me to relax?
249
00:11:23,749 --> 00:11:26,251
Boy, you look good, sweetie.
250
00:11:26,252 --> 00:11:29,254
Oh, Dutch,
I can't bear being without you.
251
00:11:29,255 --> 00:11:31,756
I'm going nuts in here
without you too.
252
00:11:31,757 --> 00:11:35,761
Dutch, you have no idea
what it's like out here.
253
00:11:42,768 --> 00:11:46,271
Yes, I do, Eunice.
I was out there.
254
00:11:46,272 --> 00:11:47,772
You've got no idea
what it's like in here.
255
00:11:47,773 --> 00:11:49,274
Oh, Dutch.
256
00:11:49,275 --> 00:11:51,276
There's no privacy.
There's no quiet.
257
00:11:51,277 --> 00:11:52,277
There's no women.
258
00:11:52,278 --> 00:11:53,778
You can't take a shower
by yourself.
259
00:11:53,779 --> 00:11:55,280
The food is lousy.
260
00:11:55,281 --> 00:11:56,281
Women?
261
00:11:56,282 --> 00:11:58,783
You want women?
262
00:11:58,784 --> 00:12:02,787
Oh, honey, I want you.
I need you.
263
00:12:02,788 --> 00:12:04,289
I need you too, Dutch.
264
00:12:04,290 --> 00:12:06,291
I need to touch you.
265
00:12:06,292 --> 00:12:07,292
I need to touch you too.
266
00:12:07,293 --> 00:12:08,793
Oh, Eunice.
267
00:12:08,794 --> 00:12:09,794
Oh, Dutch.
268
00:12:11,797 --> 00:12:13,798
I don't believe this.
269
00:12:13,799 --> 00:12:15,300
Hey, lady.
270
00:12:15,301 --> 00:12:16,801
We're in love.
271
00:12:16,802 --> 00:12:18,803
Yeah, but you're kissing glass.
272
00:12:18,804 --> 00:12:20,305
I mean, what is it
with you outsiders?
273
00:12:20,306 --> 00:12:22,307
The first thing you do
when you come in here,
274
00:12:22,308 --> 00:12:23,308
you start to kiss the glass.
275
00:12:23,309 --> 00:12:24,809
Sorry.
276
00:12:24,810 --> 00:12:26,311
Sorry?
277
00:12:29,315 --> 00:12:31,816
That's sick, that's sick!
278
00:12:31,817 --> 00:12:34,319
Please, it is all we have.
279
00:12:34,320 --> 00:12:35,820
That's it, Eunice,
I can't take this anymore.
280
00:12:35,821 --> 00:12:37,322
I'm breaking out of here.
281
00:12:37,323 --> 00:12:39,824
Oh, now, listen, Dutch,
just please try and be patient.
282
00:12:39,825 --> 00:12:41,326
I think I found a lawyer,
283
00:12:41,327 --> 00:12:42,827
and he says he can get you off
284
00:12:42,828 --> 00:12:44,329
if you'd just turn
State's Evidence.
285
00:12:44,330 --> 00:12:46,331
Are you crazy?
286
00:12:46,332 --> 00:12:48,333
Do you know what they do
to squealers in here?
287
00:12:48,334 --> 00:12:50,835
Dutch...
288
00:12:50,836 --> 00:12:52,837
It's our only chance, Dutch.
289
00:12:52,838 --> 00:12:54,839
Now, just think.
290
00:12:54,840 --> 00:12:57,342
You'd be free.
291
00:12:57,343 --> 00:12:59,344
Free.
292
00:12:59,345 --> 00:13:01,346
Will you talk to him, Dutch?
293
00:13:01,347 --> 00:13:02,347
Oh, Eunice.
294
00:13:02,348 --> 00:13:03,849
Oh, Dutch.
295
00:13:06,352 --> 00:13:08,353
Again with the glass.
296
00:13:08,354 --> 00:13:09,854
Listen, lady, your time's up.
297
00:13:09,855 --> 00:13:11,356
I love you, Eunice.
298
00:13:11,357 --> 00:13:12,858
I love you, Dutch.
299
00:13:14,860 --> 00:13:15,860
Hey, how about it?
300
00:13:15,861 --> 00:13:17,362
Hold your water, screw.
301
00:13:17,363 --> 00:13:21,366
Eunice, relax,
I've got to live here.
302
00:13:21,367 --> 00:13:24,869
All right, but just promise me
you'll talk to the lawyer, okay?
303
00:13:24,870 --> 00:13:26,871
Okay, okay.
Okay.
304
00:13:26,872 --> 00:13:31,876
Um, if he... breaks out
and gets caught,
305
00:13:31,877 --> 00:13:33,478
how much longer
would he have to stay in?
306
00:13:35,881 --> 00:13:38,383
Five more years.
307
00:13:38,384 --> 00:13:39,884
See, honey?
308
00:13:39,885 --> 00:13:41,886
So I'd think twice
about anything
309
00:13:41,887 --> 00:13:43,388
if I were you, okay?
310
00:13:43,389 --> 00:13:44,890
Yeah.
311
00:14:00,406 --> 00:14:02,407
I can't believe
I let you talk me into this.
312
00:14:02,408 --> 00:14:03,908
Sally, relax. Everything
is gonna be fine.
313
00:14:03,909 --> 00:14:05,910
Oh, fine, fine.
314
00:14:05,911 --> 00:14:08,413
Your mother's gonna walk in,
kiss you, and kill me.
315
00:14:08,414 --> 00:14:09,414
I'm leaving.
316
00:14:09,415 --> 00:14:11,416
Sally, you promised.
317
00:14:11,417 --> 00:14:12,917
She's probably not even coming.
318
00:14:12,918 --> 00:14:13,918
What makes you think
she's coming?
319
00:14:13,919 --> 00:14:15,420
I called her and told her
320
00:14:15,421 --> 00:14:16,421
that Danny was very sick.
321
00:14:16,422 --> 00:14:18,423
She's a mother.
She'll come.
322
00:14:18,424 --> 00:14:19,424
What about Burt?
323
00:14:19,425 --> 00:14:20,425
Where's Burt?
324
00:14:20,426 --> 00:14:21,426
We sent him to the store.
325
00:14:21,427 --> 00:14:23,428
When he comes back,
he'll find her here.
326
00:14:23,429 --> 00:14:25,430
What if they meet each other
coming up the driveway?
327
00:14:25,431 --> 00:14:26,931
They'll kill each other.
328
00:14:26,932 --> 00:14:28,933
And she'll walk in and kill me.
329
00:14:28,934 --> 00:14:29,934
I'm leaving.
330
00:14:29,935 --> 00:14:31,936
Here she comes.
Get her in the kitchen.
331
00:14:31,937 --> 00:14:33,438
Come on, come on.
332
00:14:37,443 --> 00:14:38,943
Hi.
333
00:14:38,944 --> 00:14:40,445
I got here as soon as I could.
334
00:14:40,446 --> 00:14:42,447
Where is he?
Is he throwing up?
335
00:14:42,448 --> 00:14:43,948
Uh, maybe.
336
00:14:43,949 --> 00:14:45,950
Hi.
337
00:14:45,951 --> 00:14:48,953
What are you doing out of bed?
You're sick.
338
00:14:48,954 --> 00:14:49,954
I'm not.
339
00:14:49,955 --> 00:14:51,956
You told me he was sick.
340
00:14:51,957 --> 00:14:54,459
I lied.
341
00:14:54,460 --> 00:14:55,460
You lied?
342
00:14:55,461 --> 00:14:56,961
Ma, it was the only way
343
00:14:56,962 --> 00:14:57,962
that we could get you here.
344
00:14:57,963 --> 00:14:59,464
We spoke to Burt,
and we believe him.
345
00:14:59,465 --> 00:15:01,466
Fine, you live with him.
346
00:15:01,467 --> 00:15:02,467
You've got to see him, Ma.
347
00:15:02,468 --> 00:15:04,969
You've got to listen to him.
348
00:15:04,970 --> 00:15:06,471
Now, I've been with him
since you left,
349
00:15:06,472 --> 00:15:07,972
and I believe
he's telling the truth.
350
00:15:07,973 --> 00:15:09,974
Forget it.
351
00:15:09,975 --> 00:15:11,977
Okay, I've got all this...
352
00:15:17,483 --> 00:15:19,984
Hey, Mare.
353
00:15:19,985 --> 00:15:21,986
What are you doing here?
354
00:15:21,987 --> 00:15:23,488
As if you didn't know.
355
00:15:23,489 --> 00:15:26,491
No, no, they told me
to go to the store
356
00:15:26,492 --> 00:15:27,992
to get some traps and cheese,
357
00:15:27,993 --> 00:15:28,993
because there are rats
358
00:15:28,994 --> 00:15:30,495
in the attic.
359
00:15:32,498 --> 00:15:34,499
They're wrong.
360
00:15:34,500 --> 00:15:37,502
The rats are in the living room.
361
00:15:37,503 --> 00:15:38,503
Ma, wait.
362
00:15:38,504 --> 00:15:40,004
Listen to him, please.
363
00:15:40,005 --> 00:15:41,005
And then you can leave
364
00:15:41,006 --> 00:15:42,507
if you want to,
365
00:15:42,508 --> 00:15:44,008
but, Mom, just
give him a chance,
366
00:15:44,009 --> 00:15:45,510
just listen to him.
367
00:16:02,528 --> 00:16:04,530
Want some cheese?
368
00:16:07,032 --> 00:16:11,035
I mean, the market was low.
I had to get Camembert.
369
00:16:11,036 --> 00:16:12,537
For rats...
370
00:16:19,044 --> 00:16:20,545
If they were French rats,
371
00:16:20,546 --> 00:16:22,047
I'd be in no trouble at all
here.
372
00:16:26,051 --> 00:16:28,553
Mare...
373
00:16:28,554 --> 00:16:31,056
Mare, I never slept with Sally.
374
00:16:36,061 --> 00:16:37,562
Is that what you have to say?
375
00:16:37,563 --> 00:16:40,064
Yeah.
376
00:16:40,065 --> 00:16:41,065
First, you told me
377
00:16:41,066 --> 00:16:43,568
that you slept
with an old, fat woman,
378
00:16:43,569 --> 00:16:45,570
then you told me
you slept with Sally,
379
00:16:45,571 --> 00:16:47,573
and now you tell me
that you slept with no one.
380
00:16:49,074 --> 00:16:53,578
Burt, one of the tricks
to lying successfully
381
00:16:53,579 --> 00:16:56,080
is to not keep changing
your story.
382
00:16:56,081 --> 00:16:59,083
But, Mare, I'm not lying.
I swear, I told you the truth.
383
00:16:59,084 --> 00:17:01,085
Really? When?
384
00:17:01,086 --> 00:17:04,088
Well, both times, actually.
385
00:17:04,089 --> 00:17:06,090
When I told you
I slept with Sally,
386
00:17:06,091 --> 00:17:08,092
that was the truth,
because then, I thought I did,
387
00:17:08,093 --> 00:17:10,094
but now, when I tell you
I didn't sleep with Sally,
388
00:17:10,095 --> 00:17:13,598
it's the truth,
because I found out I never did.
389
00:17:15,601 --> 00:17:17,101
Come on, Mare.
Where are you going?
390
00:17:17,102 --> 00:17:18,603
To the movies.
391
00:17:18,604 --> 00:17:19,604
At least there,
along with a story,
392
00:17:19,605 --> 00:17:20,606
I get some popcorn.
393
00:17:23,108 --> 00:17:24,108
Ma?
394
00:17:24,109 --> 00:17:26,611
Ma, we... we've got
a surprise for you.
395
00:17:30,115 --> 00:17:32,116
Some surprise.
396
00:17:32,117 --> 00:17:34,118
I can't wait to see
what you're planning
397
00:17:34,119 --> 00:17:36,621
for Christmas.
398
00:17:36,622 --> 00:17:38,122
Mrs. Campbell,
399
00:17:38,123 --> 00:17:39,624
please believe me,
everything I've told you
400
00:17:39,625 --> 00:17:40,626
is a lie.
401
00:17:43,128 --> 00:17:45,129
She has a lovely sense of humor,
doesn't she?
402
00:17:49,635 --> 00:17:52,637
I never had an affair with Burt.
403
00:17:52,638 --> 00:17:54,639
There was no 18-year-old.
404
00:17:54,640 --> 00:17:56,641
I made it all up.
405
00:17:56,642 --> 00:17:58,643
Ingrid Swenson's
been blackmailing me.
406
00:17:58,644 --> 00:18:00,645
Ingrid Swenson?
407
00:18:00,646 --> 00:18:02,146
You see, Mare?
I told you.
408
00:18:02,147 --> 00:18:05,149
I'm supposed to believe her?
409
00:18:05,150 --> 00:18:06,150
Get serious.
410
00:18:06,151 --> 00:18:07,652
It's true.
411
00:18:07,653 --> 00:18:11,656
She wanted me to destroy you,
and she was blackmailing me.
412
00:18:11,657 --> 00:18:13,157
You see, I...
413
00:18:13,158 --> 00:18:15,660
I made a film
that I'm not very proud of
414
00:18:15,661 --> 00:18:17,161
that she got ahold of.
415
00:18:17,162 --> 00:18:19,664
And what? Threaten
to give it to Pauline Kael?
416
00:18:25,671 --> 00:18:26,671
It was a porno film.
417
00:18:26,672 --> 00:18:28,172
Sure.
418
00:18:28,173 --> 00:18:30,675
Look.
419
00:18:30,676 --> 00:18:33,678
I'll prove it to you.
420
00:18:33,679 --> 00:18:34,679
This is it.
421
00:18:38,183 --> 00:18:39,183
Please,
422
00:18:39,184 --> 00:18:40,685
I have no interest in looking.
423
00:18:40,686 --> 00:18:43,187
I do.
424
00:18:43,188 --> 00:18:45,690
Otherwise, you won't believe me.
425
00:18:45,691 --> 00:18:46,691
Oh, please, Mary,
426
00:18:46,692 --> 00:18:48,193
I really want you to believe me.
427
00:18:59,204 --> 00:19:00,204
Now do you understand?
428
00:19:00,205 --> 00:19:01,706
Weren't you cold?
429
00:19:06,211 --> 00:19:08,713
The lights were hot.
430
00:19:08,714 --> 00:19:09,714
Anyway, she had this film,
431
00:19:09,715 --> 00:19:11,215
and she was blackmailing me
432
00:19:11,216 --> 00:19:12,216
to try to break up
your marriage.
433
00:19:12,217 --> 00:19:15,720
Did you know
the man in the mask?
434
00:19:17,723 --> 00:19:20,725
Eventually.
435
00:19:20,726 --> 00:19:22,727
Mary, Burt loves you.
436
00:19:22,728 --> 00:19:25,730
You have no idea how much.
437
00:19:25,731 --> 00:19:26,731
There's no way in the world
438
00:19:26,732 --> 00:19:29,233
he could ever be
unfaithful to you.
439
00:19:29,234 --> 00:19:31,235
God knows I tried.
440
00:19:33,238 --> 00:19:35,240
But I never...
441
00:19:37,242 --> 00:19:38,243
I never did, Mary.
442
00:19:42,247 --> 00:19:44,749
Sally, thanks.
443
00:19:44,750 --> 00:19:46,751
Yeah.
444
00:19:46,752 --> 00:19:48,253
Guys...
445
00:20:05,270 --> 00:20:06,771
You never...?
446
00:20:06,772 --> 00:20:08,773
Never.
447
00:20:08,774 --> 00:20:10,274
With anyone?
448
00:20:10,275 --> 00:20:11,776
No.
449
00:20:11,777 --> 00:20:14,278
Oh, God, I thought...
450
00:20:14,279 --> 00:20:16,280
Oh, I know.
451
00:20:16,281 --> 00:20:18,783
I hated you.
452
00:20:18,784 --> 00:20:21,285
I have never hated anyone
so much.
453
00:20:21,286 --> 00:20:23,288
I saw that.
454
00:20:25,791 --> 00:20:27,793
That's because I love you so.
455
00:20:30,295 --> 00:20:33,297
I know.
456
00:20:33,298 --> 00:20:35,300
Oh, Burt...
457
00:20:39,304 --> 00:20:40,805
Come on.
458
00:20:55,821 --> 00:20:59,323
Utchie-gutchie,
utchie-gutchie!
459
00:20:59,324 --> 00:21:00,825
Eeugh.
460
00:21:02,828 --> 00:21:05,329
Whoo, wittle baby,
461
00:21:05,330 --> 00:21:07,832
Gwandma wuvs you
very, very much.
462
00:21:07,833 --> 00:21:09,334
Yes, she does.
463
00:21:12,337 --> 00:21:14,839
Why are you doing that?
464
00:21:14,840 --> 00:21:18,843
Benson, this is my grandchild.
465
00:21:18,844 --> 00:21:19,844
So?
466
00:21:19,845 --> 00:21:22,346
Oh, it's baby talk.
467
00:21:22,347 --> 00:21:24,849
Well, I don't hear him
talking that way.
468
00:21:26,351 --> 00:21:27,852
Oh, Corinne,
469
00:21:27,853 --> 00:21:30,354
he is the most beautiful baby,
470
00:21:30,355 --> 00:21:31,856
I think, in the whole world.
471
00:21:31,857 --> 00:21:33,357
Me too,
472
00:21:33,358 --> 00:21:35,359
but I'm partial.
473
00:21:35,360 --> 00:21:36,360
Grandpa,
474
00:21:36,361 --> 00:21:38,362
what do you think of
your great-grandchild?
475
00:21:38,363 --> 00:21:41,365
Is it a boy or a girl?
476
00:21:41,366 --> 00:21:44,368
Daddy, it's a boy, silly.
477
00:21:44,369 --> 00:21:47,872
It's hard to tell
without a uniform.
478
00:21:50,375 --> 00:21:51,876
At ease.
479
00:21:54,379 --> 00:21:56,380
I just wish Tim could be here.
480
00:21:56,381 --> 00:21:58,382
He doesn't even know
the baby's been born.
481
00:21:58,383 --> 00:22:00,384
Corinne,
482
00:22:00,385 --> 00:22:01,886
maybe somebody
should go to his cave
483
00:22:01,887 --> 00:22:04,388
and tell him he's a father.
484
00:22:04,389 --> 00:22:06,891
You see, that way, he'll know.
485
00:22:06,892 --> 00:22:07,892
Otherwise, I mean, he won't,
486
00:22:07,893 --> 00:22:09,393
and why should he come
and see his son
487
00:22:09,394 --> 00:22:10,895
if he doesn't know
that he has one?
488
00:22:10,896 --> 00:22:13,898
That's a good idea, Ma,
489
00:22:13,899 --> 00:22:15,399
but... but Tim
doesn't believe
490
00:22:15,400 --> 00:22:16,901
it's his baby.
491
00:22:16,902 --> 00:22:19,403
Well, considering
how good-looking that baby is,
492
00:22:19,404 --> 00:22:21,406
I don't believe it either.
493
00:22:24,910 --> 00:22:28,913
Oh, Lord,
I can't take any more of this.
494
00:22:29,915 --> 00:22:31,916
Ma...
495
00:22:31,917 --> 00:22:33,417
why don't we all go downstairs
496
00:22:33,418 --> 00:22:35,419
and let him sleep.
497
00:22:35,420 --> 00:22:36,921
He's had a very busy day.
498
00:22:36,922 --> 00:22:38,923
I'll say he had a busy day.
499
00:22:38,924 --> 00:22:40,425
I've changed him six times.
500
00:23:54,820 --> 00:23:56,500
Now that Jessica has a loverand a husband,
501
00:23:56,501 --> 00:23:59,003
what will life be like for her,besides busy?
502
00:23:59,004 --> 00:24:00,504
Now that his high school love
503
00:24:00,505 --> 00:24:02,006
is going to introduce himto the Sunnys,
504
00:24:02,007 --> 00:24:04,008
what's in store for Billy?
505
00:24:04,009 --> 00:24:06,010
Now that Burt and Maryare back together,
506
00:24:06,011 --> 00:24:07,511
what will Ingrid Swensondo next?
507
00:24:07,512 --> 00:24:09,013
Now that Eunicehas convinced Dutch
508
00:24:09,014 --> 00:24:10,014
not to break out,
509
00:24:10,015 --> 00:24:11,515
will she break in?
510
00:24:11,516 --> 00:24:13,517
And now, as if the Tatesdon't have enough trouble,
511
00:24:13,518 --> 00:24:16,020
what the devil is going onin the nursery?
512
00:24:16,021 --> 00:24:18,022
These questions and many others
513
00:24:18,023 --> 00:24:19,903
will be answered on the nextepisode of... Soap.
514
00:24:25,530 --> 00:24:29,033
Soap is videotapedbefore a studio audience.
33657
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