All language subtitles for Hogans Heroes s02e25 Reverend Kommandant Klink.eng

ANNOUNCER:
CBS presents this program in color.

( theme song playing )

Come on, Schultz!
It's freezing out here!

What's the
holdup, Schultz?

Yeah, you wouldn't want me
to write my congressman!

It's not up to me!

We have to wait
for the commandant,

but in the meantime

I'm going to enforce
the same iron discipline...

( whistle blowing )

Herr Kommandant,
I beg to report

all present
and accounted for!

Schultz, what are you
bothering me for?

An enemy plane
was shot down.

The pilot made it out.

We must find him!
Don't you understand?!

Yes, Herr Kommandant.
Certainly, Herr Kommandant!

Well, what are you waiting for?!

Oh, you want me to find him?

Of course!

Release the dogs,
sound the alarm,

but get him! Get him! Get him!

Yes, Herr Kommandant.
Certainly Herr Kommandant!

Herr Kommandant,
you can be assured...

Go, go, go, go,
go, go, go, go, go!

Jawohl!

Release the dogs!
Sound the alarm!

( whistle blowing )

( alarm ringing )

( dogs barking )

What do you
think, Colonel?

I think for a big man,
Schultz moves pretty fast.

Well?

Couldn't get close
to him, Colonel.

It's been 24 hours
since they brought him in.

I tried.

Who's running this camp,
the Germans?

The Gestapo major
still has him

in Klink's office
for questioning.

Get plugged in, Kinch.

Right, Colonel.

What's all this flap

about one fighter pilot?

They want something from him.

What is it?

Ah, Lieutenant Boucher.

You are with the
brave Free French.

My name is Lieutenant
Claude Boucher,

serial number 42105513.

Lieutenant, we already
know you are Free French.

We also know the
English fighter group

to which you
are attached--

Pardon, were attached--

And we know a
great deal more.

Lieutenant,
the Gestapo

is a most efficient
organization,

and I would suggest
that you cooperate with them fully.

I always do.
I do.

Thank you, thank you.

Since your capture
yesterday,

we have been checking
into your background.

You were an aspiring actor
in Paris before the war, yes?

Would you believe it,

but before I found
my true calling as a soldier,

that is, I, uh, also toyed
with the idea of possibly...

Some other time.

Some other time.

And you have family
in Paris, I believe.

No, none. That is blackmail!

If you have no family in Paris,
how can we blackmail you?

This picture
that you were carrying...

she is very pretty.

Oh, yes, very.

She was your fiancé?

She is my fiancé.

Oh?

Strange, she did not
act like a fiancee

when I saw her
two weeks ago.

You are lying.

Most charming.

Mademoiselle Suzanne.

She has made the burdens
of war less heavy

for a great many
German officers.

( laughing )

I am sorry.

"C'est la guerre,"
you would say, huh?

I don't believe it.

You remember her from
your last Paris leave, Klink?

The pretty little actress
at the Theater Athenée.

As a matter
of fact, Major,

I had a miserable
time in Paris.

First, I caught a dreadful
head cold, and then I...

Klink.

Oh, of course,
I remember.

Oh, oh, yes. Of course.

Charming. Charming.

Do not hate her,
Lieutenant.

After all, it has been years
since she has seen you.

France has lost the war.

She has accepted
that hard fact.

I am sure you
will do the same.

How could she do
a thing like that?

She didn't.

It's the oldest line
in the world,

and Boucher's falling for it.

How do you know
it's a line, Colonel?

Carter, can you
imagine a girl,

any girl, going out
with Klink?

No, I can't.

What do you think
they want from him?

I think he's
getting to it. Listen.

Right now, Lieutenant, you think
you have not much to live for,

but life goes on.

It can be easy
or hard.

A little conversation
with us,

a few facts that could not
possibly hurt anyone

could make
all the difference.

What facts?

Well, your fighter group
we already know.

The location of your air base,
we know approximately

but just clear this
up for our records.

I will never tell you that.

Lieutenant, I would not advise
you to defy Major Hochstetter.

He has ways
of extracting information

that are most unpleasant.

No, no, no, Klink.

There is time.

Let him make up his own mind.

Back to solitary,
young man.

Think about it.

We'll talk
again tomorrow.

Ooh, Major, I wish you'd give me
a chance to talk to him.

No, no, no, Klink.

Let him think
about his lovely lost Suzanne.

In a day or two,
he will tell us everything.

He will, too, traitor.

Far too romantic,
you Frenchman.

Unstable.
Oh, yeah?

I wouldn't crack up

because my girl
double-crossed me.

I guess I'd
expect it.

What do we do
about him, Colonel?

You got any ideas?

I'm thinking, I'm thinking.

Maybe Hochstetter
will give him

a three-day pass
to go to Paris and get married.

Hey, that's a great idea.
I'll go along as flower girl.

Maid of honor!

Hold it, hold it.

LeBeau, I think you hit it.

I did?

With a slight change.

We bring the girl here
to get him married.

Colonel, you
feel all right?

It's battle fatigue.

I've seen it coming on.

And no man
deserved it more.

Maybe I'm in the wrong outfit.

Isn't this the bunch
that built the plane right here

and flew it out of camp?

Stole a tank
and hid it in the barracks?

Kidnapped
a German general

and took him
to bomb his own refinery?

What's a simple
little wedding?

Well, as long
as it's a simple wedding.

I'll give you my word,
just 200 guests.

What? 200?

Who's going to perform
the ceremony?

Easy. Who's the most qualified?

I won't even guess,

because I'll be
dead wrong. Dead wrong.

Don't you see, fellas?

On a ship,
it's the captain, right?

Right.

This entire area

is under martial law.

Who has civilian
and military authority?

Colonel, you
don't mean...

Commandant Klink?

Fellas, you knew
it all the time.

This is a big
assignment, LeBeau.

You've got
to get to Paris safely.

Gotta find an actress
named Suzanne who's engaged

to an actor-flier
named Claude Boucher.

You bring her back here,
all within 24 hours.

You think
you can handle it?

Well, one thing that
bothers me, Colonel.

What?

Will that give me time
to look up my old girlfriends?

Ration yourself.

Pick up the motorcycle
in Hammelburg, okay?

Right.
Au revoir, Colonel.

Au revoir, Kinch.
Take it easy.

Au revoir, Carter.
Come on!

Hey, old buddy.

What if you approach

this Suzanne
and find out she really

has gone over to the Nazis?

What happens to you?

I have eternal faith
in French womanhood.

Also, I'm a very
fast runner.

Aha!

I saw something.

Come on in, Schultz.

I am already in!

I'm here to make
a bed check.

Excellent idea. Why?

Because there's a
Gestapo major here.

His name is
Major Hochstetter,

and if anything
should happen while

Major Hochstetter
is here, it will not

be the fault of
Sergeant Schultz.

Line your men up in
front of the bunks!

What for?

So I can see
that everybody

is here, is what for.

Everybody's here,
take my word for it.

Everybody except LeBeau.

Uh-huh.

And where is LeBeau?

Paris.

Colonel Hogan, you must

tell me, because...

Paris?

Just on his way, really.

Paris, France?

Carter, you better
get Schultz a chair.

Right away, Colonel.

No chair!

There has been an escape?

I have to report this
to Commandant Klink!

You do that, Schultz,

and good luck.

Good luck to me?

Ha! Good luck to you!

Why did you
say, "Good luck"?

It's pretty
obvious, isn't it?

You know how Klink's proud of
his record here at Stalag 13.

Never an escape.

Now one of your
prisoners is missing.

I'm gonna miss you, Schultz.

Take plenty
of warm clothing.

Look, he might like
the Russians.

He might never come back.

Colonel Hogan.

Well, maybe
Major Hochstetter will defend you.

Major Hochstetter?

What am I supposed to do?

Hope for a break.

With luck, LeBeau
will be back in 24 hours.

Oh, he will?

And you won't tell
Kommandant Klink?

I promise.

You are my best friend.

Right. Now go back
to your barracks

and lie down under
your favorite blanket

and let us do the worrying.

Thank you.

Oh, LeBeau will be back?

With the girl.

What girl?

The one who's gonna get
married to the young flier.

I hear nothing!

Nothing!

This could have been
a little sticky, Colonel.

Yeah, that's the one trouble
with a big wedding.

The details can drive you crazy.

Mademoiselle Suzanne?

Merci.

Mademoiselle Suzanne?

Merci.

Mademoiselle Suzanne?

I do not know you.

Let me introduce myself.

Please. I do not speak
to German soldiers.

You do not know
how happy that makes me.

Pourquoi?

I am French.
My name is Louis LeBeau

and I am a friend
of Claude Boucher,

Claude.

Oh, Claude.

Is he all right?

Has anything
happened to him?

He was shot down,
but he is safe.

Oh, mon dieu.

Mon dieu.

He is captured?

Yes.

Oh, well, no matter,
as long as he's safe.

If I could only tell
him that I will wait.

You may not have to.

Are you doing
anything tonight

that will prevent your
getting married?

You, you're joking.

No.

I'm here to take you to him.

Your wedding coach.

Oh, but I, but I
don't understand.

Well, I don't
even know you.

Oh, but you are
a wonderful man.

Magnifique.

You are a friend of Claude?

Already I hate him.

Look at your situation
realistically, Boucher.

You have lost the war,
you have lost your fiancee,

and now you have
lost your liberty.

Who can make life
better for you, eh?

Your friends-- the Germans.

We're a wonderful people.

Klink.

Hochstetter's bearing down
pretty hard.

He's not gonna
crack already?

Actors are
all unstable

and French actors
are the worst.

He might hold out, but we'd
better not take any chances.

I'll get over there.

Oh, here's
the pill, Colonel.

Let's hope I don't
have to use it.

Sooner or later
we will find the position

of your air base without you,

so why not get a little
something out of it yourself?

Yes, and then
you will bomb it.

No, nothing could be
further from our minds.

We only want the position
for our records.

That's all.

Colonel Hogan to see you,
Herr Kommandant.

Absolutely not!

Colonel Klink, I know
it's just an oversight,

but I haven't yet been able
to advise this prisoner

of his rights under
the Geneva Convention.

That's why I'm here.

Who is this man?

Hogan, we are conducting
an interrogation.

I order you to leave at once.

All right, let's talk
about something else.

Who is this man!?

Morale is very low
among the men, Commandant,

so we're putting on
a camp show tonight.

Say, we could write in
a part for you, sir.

It's one of those
character pieces,

but those kind make
or break a production.

You're not writing
in anything for me.

Well, we can work out the
fine details later on.

All I need is your permission
for the show idea.

You have it.
Now leave, leave, leave.

Thanks, sir.

Say, is this man an actor?

He'd be perfect
for the part. Perfect.

Who is this man?!

Colonel Hogan, Major,
but of course,

you won't let us
have him for the show,

so forget I mentioned it.

I've forgotten it.

Wait.

Boucher was an actor.

It might be enjoyable for him.

So you won't let us have him.

Why not?
We are his friends.

That's very big of you, sir.

Could I have him right now
for rehearsal?

No, no rehearsal.

You can have him
for the performance only,

under close supervision.

Well, that's not so big of you,
but I'll take it.

Could I watch him drink
a glass of water?

Why?

It's an old Stanislavski test
of acting ability.

I want to make sure
he's right for the part.

I'll just help myself.

Bottoms up.

Did you see that?

This man has
the makings of a star!

Thank you, Major.

Commandant.

See you at the
show tonight.

A little eccentric,

but thoroughly cowed,
sir, thoroughly.

Perhaps.

So, we do something once
again, nice for you, eh?

A little reciprocation?

Just the location
of your air base.

Is it north of
London or south?

Or possibly east?

West?

Boucher?

What's the matter, Major?

This man is asleep.

How could this
have happened?

I suspect your thoroughly
cowed Colonel Hogan.

Impossible!

Isn't it?

Later on, we'll make
a surprise inspection.

He's too smart for you, Klink,
but not for me.

Well, as long as we're covered.

Did you get the girl?

Where is she?

Oh, it's so good
to be home!

LeBeau?

Oh, the girl, of course.

( wolf whistle )

( all talking at once )

Be careful there.

Suzanne, the boys.

Hello, boys!

ALL:
Hi.

Colonel Hogan.

Enchantée, Colonel.

I'm the father
of the bride.

Let's make that cousin.

But, you know,
this is all so fantastic!

I can't believe it.

Does Claude know I'm here?

No, and I probably won't
get a chance to tell him

before the ceremony,
so be prepared for anything.

All right.

Colonel.

Klink's coming
with Hochstetter.

All right,
back in the tunnel.

No time!

All right, in my office.

Quick, quick!

Achtung!

Hello, Major.

How did you know
we like surprises?

Are they all here, Klink?

Of course, Major.

In all the history
of Stalag 13,

we have never
had one single...

They are all here,
aren't they, Schultz?

Herr Kommandant,
on one hand I might say, I...

What was the question?

What's the matter with you?

Are they all here or
are they not all here?

Well, Herr Kommandant,
I should say

almost all are here.

Almost?

Uh-huh, we have
uncovered something.

Corporal LeBeau
is missing, sir.

He's escaped?

Schultz, why didn't
you tell me?

He didn't escape.
He's in my office.

What?

Someone ask for me?

There is something afoot
here, Klink. I smell it.

Perhaps we should
search your office.

Oh, please do.

I'm so proud of it.

I want you to see
how we furnished it

in orange crate modern.

No.

You are too eager.

I blew it.

But from now on,
my eye will be upon you.

Good.

Good.

By the way, Commandant,
I have some bad news for you.

Somebody else is going
to take your part.

What part?

In our play tonight.

We thought you were
a little short.

Hogan, I have
no intention of playing it!

You will play it.

I'll play it!

I will?

If this man wants you out,

I want you in to watch
what is going on.

Years of understanding
the criminal mind.

You cannot compete
against it.

I wouldn't even try.

( hammering )

( sighs )

We'll use this one, Kinch.

Right.

( sawing )

Reverend?

Yes?

Uh, Commandant,
you have had

stage experience,
haven't you?

Of course, of course.

What was your last part?

Peter Pan.

But that was
some time ago.

Well, once you've got it,
you never lose it.

Boucher?

Look, we haven't had
a chance to rehearse

so I'll give it to you now.

You're going to be the groom...

and this is your bride.

Now, this is the bride's
mother and father.

Hogan!

Oh, yes, the commandant
will marry you.

I do not recall
giving permission

to Fraulein Hilda
to be part of this.

You can kiss the bride.

Oh.

Now, the bride's veil
will be down

and all during the ceremony,

you think you're marrying
someone else.

It's only when you lift
the veil to kiss her,

that you see that it's the one
you really love,

the one they told you
had run out on you,

but now you know she didn't.

Do you follow me?

I don't think so.

You will.

Now, the impact
of the scene

is the look on your face
when you turn the bride

away from the commandant
and lift her veil like this.

Shall I try it?

Don't waste it.

It's curtain time.

Hilda, you better
fix your veil.

Jawohl, mein Colonel.

Good luck.

Carter?

Oh, you never
looked more beautiful.

Thank you, Colonel.

You're superb,
Newkirk.

You're not just
saying that, sir?

No.

Commandant,

tonight you make
them forget

all about Peter Pan.

Major, shall we
go out front

and watch the show?

Good luck.

( cheers and applause )

( booing )

Boo.
Boo.

Boo!

( booing continues )

So far it's going well,
don't you think?

We shall see.

( "Wedding March" playing )

( cheering and applause )

( laughing )

( applause )

It's going to be
a beautiful wedding.

Will the, uh...

will the couple
please join hands?

And now, do you...

Suzanne.

KLINK:
...take this man to be

your lawful
wedded husband,

to love, honor

and cherish till death
do you part?

I do.

KLINK:
And do you...

Uh, uh, Claude.

...take this woman
to have and to hold,

from this day forward,
till death do you part?

I do.

Then by the authority
vested in me,

I now pronounce you
man and wife.

You may kiss the bride.

( cheering )

Wasn't it marvelous?

What was it?

Bravo! Author! Author!

( booing )

( booing continues )

I am telling you, Klink,

that something was
going on last night.

I smell it!

Major, nothing
happened.

There was a show.

True, the performance
declined in quality

after my little sketch, but...

nothing happened.

Schultz.

You kept Boucher in sight

every minute during
the rest of the show?

Me, Herr Major?

I was supposed to?

Schultz!

Fraulein Hilda.

You saw what
Boucher was doing

at all times
during the evening?

You know how it is, Major.

Once a woman marries a man,

some of the interest is gone.

( chuckling )

Yes. Quite right, eh?

Well, perhaps nothing
happened after all.

Heh. Bring him in.

Jawohl, Herr Major.

Boucher!

Good morning,
Lieutenant.

I hope you enjoyed

performing again
last night.

Oh, yes, sir.
Thank you sir.

Oh, it was
nothing, nothing.

We're your friends, no?

Of course.
Definitely.

HOCHSTETTER:
Good, good.

Then, just
between friends,

perhaps this morning
you are ready to give us

the position of
that air base, eh?

Well, I can tell you that...

I can tell you that
my name is Claude Boucher.

That my rank is
first lieutenant.

That my serial number
is 42105513.

That is all.
All?!

All?!

All.

May I be excused, sir?

No! If that is
your attitude,

I shall take you back
to Berlin with me

and force the
information out of you!

I'm afraid Hermann Goering
wouldn't approve of that, sir.

You know, we've got a lot more
of his fly boys in English camps

than he has of ours.

You stay out of this!

KLINK:
Major Hochstetter,

it is true that
any transfer of prisoners

has to be passed on

by Luftwaffe
headquarters, and then...

( yelling )

May I be
excused now, sir?

Go! What do I care?!

I doubt if the
Luftwaffe could

scrape together
enough planes

to bomb your
air base anyway!

What do you want, Hogan?

Yes, what do you want, Hogan?

I wanted to give you
the overnight reaction

of the critics, sir,
on the performance.

Yes?

Well, they all loved
the girl and the boy,

they split about half and half
on the mother and father.

And... me?

Sorry, sir.

Too German-looking.

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