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00:00:03,629 --> 00:00:06,882
ANNOUNCER:
CBS presents this programin color.
2
00:00:22,940 --> 00:00:25,567
( theme song playing )
3
00:00:58,767 --> 00:01:00,143
You got the plan all
straight, Houlihan?
4
00:01:00,185 --> 00:01:01,436
Yeah. You think
it'll really work?
5
00:01:01,478 --> 00:01:02,437
It always has.
6
00:01:02,479 --> 00:01:03,981
Yeah, a week from now,
7
00:01:03,981 --> 00:01:05,732
you'll be back
in England.
8
00:01:05,774 --> 00:01:06,817
Wait a minute,
LeBeau.
9
00:01:06,817 --> 00:01:08,485
That's too small.
Get another one, huh?
10
00:01:08,485 --> 00:01:09,903
Right, sir.
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00:01:12,572 --> 00:01:14,157
Colonel, but
what happens when they find
12
00:01:14,199 --> 00:01:15,325
there's a prisoner
missing?
13
00:01:15,325 --> 00:01:16,368
Oh, but there won't be.
14
00:01:16,410 --> 00:01:18,495
You see, we've got
a shot-down airman waiting
15
00:01:18,495 --> 00:01:20,497
to be smuggled in
to take your place.
16
00:01:20,539 --> 00:01:22,374
Thanks, LeBeau.
17
00:01:22,416 --> 00:01:24,793
Ah, wunderbar.
18
00:01:24,835 --> 00:01:25,794
This way, chum.
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00:01:25,836 --> 00:01:26,837
Good luck, Houlihan.
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00:01:26,878 --> 00:01:27,838
KINCH:
Take it easy.
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00:01:27,879 --> 00:01:30,465
And remember,
getting there is half the fun.
22
00:01:31,925 --> 00:01:35,178
That's the 107th guy
so far this year, Colonel.
23
00:01:35,220 --> 00:01:36,346
Don't you ever wish
it was you
24
00:01:36,346 --> 00:01:37,514
making that little
trip back home?
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00:01:37,556 --> 00:01:38,515
No, siree.
When I leave,
26
00:01:38,557 --> 00:01:40,517
I'm walking out
right out that front gate.
27
00:01:40,517 --> 00:01:43,228
And besides, I look terrible
in a Tyrolian hat.
28
00:01:43,270 --> 00:01:44,521
Here you are, chap.
29
00:01:44,521 --> 00:01:45,772
Welcome to Stalag 13.
30
00:01:45,814 --> 00:01:47,232
Hi. Colonel Hogan.
31
00:01:47,274 --> 00:01:48,859
Schultz is coming.
32
00:01:50,986 --> 00:01:51,945
Achtung!
33
00:01:51,987 --> 00:01:54,865
Everybody, achtung,
if you please.
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00:01:54,865 --> 00:01:57,242
Ho-ho! Ho-ho-ho!
Wait a minute.
35
00:01:57,284 --> 00:02:00,162
Who, what, what, what,
who is this?
36
00:02:00,203 --> 00:02:01,371
What's the matter,
Schultz?
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00:02:01,371 --> 00:02:03,123
Don't you recognize
good old Houlihan?
38
00:02:03,165 --> 00:02:04,207
Good old Houlihan?
39
00:02:04,207 --> 00:02:06,626
That is good old Houlihan?
40
00:02:06,668 --> 00:02:08,170
( all agreeing )
41
00:02:08,211 --> 00:02:10,088
( laughs )
Good old Houlihan
42
00:02:10,130 --> 00:02:12,382
was like this,
not like that.
43
00:02:12,382 --> 00:02:13,633
He shrunk
a little bit.
44
00:02:13,675 --> 00:02:14,885
It's that
prison camp diet.
45
00:02:14,885 --> 00:02:15,886
Uh-huh, yeah.
46
00:02:15,886 --> 00:02:17,512
( sirens blaring )
Hey, what's that?
47
00:02:17,554 --> 00:02:18,597
SCHULTZ:
Wait, wait, hold it, hold it!
48
00:02:18,638 --> 00:02:21,641
Everybody back,
back, back, back, back!
49
00:02:21,683 --> 00:02:23,393
No one is
going outside.
50
00:02:23,435 --> 00:02:25,187
Nobody looking outside.
51
00:02:25,228 --> 00:02:26,229
Order of the
commandant.
52
00:02:26,271 --> 00:02:27,564
Why? Who's out there,
Schultz?
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00:02:27,564 --> 00:02:28,565
I will not tell you.
54
00:02:28,565 --> 00:02:31,443
Once in a while,
I have to be on our side.
55
00:02:31,485 --> 00:02:34,070
Oh, let's look
out the window.
56
00:02:34,070 --> 00:02:36,615
No! No, no, no, no!
Wait! Hold it!
57
00:02:36,656 --> 00:02:38,366
No, no, no, no, no, no!
58
00:02:38,408 --> 00:02:39,993
Nobody at the window!
59
00:02:40,035 --> 00:02:41,536
Nobody looking out.
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00:02:41,578 --> 00:02:42,746
I have my orders.
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00:02:42,787 --> 00:02:43,747
All right, Schultz.
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00:02:43,788 --> 00:02:45,123
Keep them away
from the window.
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00:02:49,085 --> 00:02:50,462
Must be a new prisoner.
64
00:02:50,504 --> 00:02:52,589
KINCH:
Yeah, a big one to get treatment like that.
65
00:02:52,589 --> 00:02:53,924
Yeah, but who?
66
00:02:53,924 --> 00:02:55,509
I think I'll
find out from Klink.
67
00:02:55,550 --> 00:02:56,551
SCHULTZ:
No, no, no, no!
68
00:02:56,593 --> 00:02:58,261
All right, come on, fellas.
Break it up.
69
00:02:58,261 --> 00:02:59,304
Schultz has his orders.
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00:02:59,346 --> 00:03:01,598
That's right!
No looking!
71
00:03:01,640 --> 00:03:03,475
That's right, Schultz.
And don't worry.
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00:03:03,517 --> 00:03:05,018
Nobody saw the truck
or the prisoner.
73
00:03:05,060 --> 00:03:07,229
Good.
74
00:03:07,270 --> 00:03:09,272
Truck?
75
00:03:09,272 --> 00:03:11,066
Prisoner?
76
00:03:11,191 --> 00:03:12,734
I know nothing!
77
00:03:25,872 --> 00:03:27,040
( knocking )
78
00:03:27,082 --> 00:03:28,792
Come in, come in.
79
00:03:28,792 --> 00:03:30,043
Yes, Hogan, what
is it this time?
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00:03:30,085 --> 00:03:31,127
Another complaint?
81
00:03:31,127 --> 00:03:32,170
Yes, sir.
82
00:03:32,212 --> 00:03:33,171
You see,
the men feel...
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00:03:33,213 --> 00:03:34,172
Denied.
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00:03:34,214 --> 00:03:35,507
Hogan, I am much
too busy today
85
00:03:35,548 --> 00:03:38,051
to be concerned
with your petty little problems.
86
00:03:38,093 --> 00:03:39,052
I understand, sir,
87
00:03:39,094 --> 00:03:40,220
it's just that the men
are worried about you.
88
00:03:40,262 --> 00:03:41,388
Worried about me?
89
00:03:41,429 --> 00:03:43,306
As you said, you've
more important things to think about.
90
00:03:43,306 --> 00:03:44,683
Hogan, wait, wait.
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00:03:44,724 --> 00:03:46,893
As commandant,
it is my duty
92
00:03:46,935 --> 00:03:50,272
to be interested
in the welfare of my men.
93
00:03:50,313 --> 00:03:51,773
Now, what is it
about me?
94
00:03:51,815 --> 00:03:54,150
Colonel, you have
a wonderful record here.
95
00:03:54,192 --> 00:03:55,360
Two years and
not one escape.
96
00:03:55,402 --> 00:03:56,736
That's something
to be proud of.
97
00:03:56,778 --> 00:03:58,905
You're proud of it
and we're proud of it.
98
00:03:58,947 --> 00:04:01,449
Naturally, naturally.
Thank you.
99
00:04:01,491 --> 00:04:02,826
So?
100
00:04:02,826 --> 00:04:03,910
So it's just not fair.
101
00:04:03,952 --> 00:04:06,663
Why doesn't
the high command recognize your ability?
102
00:04:06,663 --> 00:04:07,956
Instead, all their
attention goes
103
00:04:07,998 --> 00:04:09,624
to that Colonel Steuben
at Kleinfeld Prison,
104
00:04:09,666 --> 00:04:12,168
and he's not half
the officer you are.
105
00:04:12,168 --> 00:04:14,713
Mm! Steuben at Kleinfeld--
he is nothing!
106
00:04:14,754 --> 00:04:17,090
Yeah, then why do all
the important prisoners
107
00:04:17,132 --> 00:04:18,091
go there instead
of here?
108
00:04:18,133 --> 00:04:19,676
It's a slur
against you, sir.
109
00:04:19,676 --> 00:04:20,677
And all of us
110
00:04:20,677 --> 00:04:22,804
are pretty unhappy
about it.
111
00:04:22,846 --> 00:04:24,014
Why, we want to know,
112
00:04:24,055 --> 00:04:26,599
why is our commandant
being overlooked. Why?
113
00:04:26,641 --> 00:04:28,184
It's just not right.
114
00:04:28,184 --> 00:04:29,853
Mm-hmm.
115
00:04:29,853 --> 00:04:31,187
So, uh,
my prisoners feel
116
00:04:31,187 --> 00:04:34,482
that their good colonel
is being overlooked, huh?
117
00:04:34,524 --> 00:04:37,861
Not so,
my dear Hogan, not so.
118
00:04:37,861 --> 00:04:39,779
The prisoners can relax.
119
00:04:39,821 --> 00:04:42,323
My abilities
are recognized.
120
00:04:42,365 --> 00:04:44,367
Uh, by the way,
did you notice
121
00:04:44,367 --> 00:04:46,286
the truck
that just arrived?
122
00:04:46,327 --> 00:04:48,038
Truck?
A truck came in?
123
00:04:48,079 --> 00:04:49,873
We were all so busy
with our ceramics, sir.
124
00:04:49,873 --> 00:04:51,249
Yes, there was a truck.
125
00:04:51,291 --> 00:04:55,045
On it was a prisoner,
an American officer.
126
00:04:55,086 --> 00:04:56,755
All right, so they send
you a second lieutenant.
127
00:04:56,796 --> 00:04:58,506
Still, sir, a man
with your record...
128
00:04:58,548 --> 00:04:59,674
No, no, no, no, no!
129
00:04:59,716 --> 00:05:01,968
Not a second lieutenant,
not a first lieutenant.
130
00:05:02,010 --> 00:05:03,970
All right,
a captain then. Still, sir...
131
00:05:04,012 --> 00:05:04,971
No, no, no, no.
132
00:05:05,013 --> 00:05:05,972
Not a captain.
133
00:05:06,014 --> 00:05:06,973
You're pulling
my leg.
134
00:05:07,015 --> 00:05:08,016
What could he be?
135
00:05:10,894 --> 00:05:13,897
Let me just say,
Colonel,
136
00:05:13,897 --> 00:05:16,524
that you are no longer
the highest-ranking prisoner
137
00:05:16,566 --> 00:05:17,525
in this camp.
138
00:05:17,567 --> 00:05:19,277
No.
139
00:05:19,319 --> 00:05:21,154
Not a general.
140
00:05:21,196 --> 00:05:23,698
I won't say yes,
I won't say no.
141
00:05:23,740 --> 00:05:27,660
Just important enough
for Field Marshal von Heinke
142
00:05:27,702 --> 00:05:29,996
to arrive here tomorrow
at my invitation.
143
00:05:30,038 --> 00:05:32,916
Now, we will be photographed
together with the prisoner,
144
00:05:32,916 --> 00:05:36,002
in front of his plane,
which was shot down.
145
00:05:36,044 --> 00:05:37,086
( truck approaching )
146
00:05:37,128 --> 00:05:37,879
Ah, and there it is now.
147
00:05:42,133 --> 00:05:45,053
Who'd you say
this American general was?
148
00:05:47,096 --> 00:05:48,973
That, my dear
Colonel Hogan,
149
00:05:49,015 --> 00:05:50,809
you will find out
tomorrow,
150
00:05:50,850 --> 00:05:53,603
along with the rest
of the world.
151
00:05:53,603 --> 00:05:55,688
I can hardly wait, sir.
152
00:05:55,730 --> 00:05:56,731
I can't tell you
153
00:05:56,773 --> 00:05:58,733
what this will mean
to our men, sir.
154
00:05:58,775 --> 00:06:01,444
At last, they'll be able
to sleep at night.
155
00:06:01,444 --> 00:06:04,072
Congratulations.
156
00:06:04,113 --> 00:06:05,573
Mm-hmm!
157
00:06:19,420 --> 00:06:22,090
They've captured
a general.
158
00:06:22,131 --> 00:06:23,633
Not just a general,
that's General Barton.
159
00:06:23,633 --> 00:06:24,717
Barton?!
160
00:06:24,759 --> 00:06:26,261
I've been on the radio
to London.
161
00:06:26,302 --> 00:06:28,805
General Barton,
chief of all daylight bombing?
162
00:06:28,805 --> 00:06:31,015
No wonder they're taking
pictures tomorrow.
163
00:06:31,057 --> 00:06:32,684
What a propaganda
plum for them.
164
00:06:32,725 --> 00:06:34,978
London also wants us
to spring him.
165
00:06:35,019 --> 00:06:36,271
Spring a general?
166
00:06:36,312 --> 00:06:38,690
Oh, blimey,
they know how to ask.
167
00:06:38,731 --> 00:06:40,191
That's a flipping
tough assignment.
168
00:06:40,233 --> 00:06:42,819
If he was just an ordinary
prisoner, maybe, but...
169
00:06:42,860 --> 00:06:44,654
Wait a minute,
LeBeau. That's it.
170
00:06:44,654 --> 00:06:48,783
If we could convince Klink
that guy isn't Barton...
171
00:06:48,825 --> 00:06:49,659
Hello.
172
00:06:51,869 --> 00:06:54,831
NEWKIRK:
That must be one of the crew from the general's plane.
173
00:06:54,831 --> 00:06:56,541
LeBeau, see what
you've got
174
00:06:56,582 --> 00:06:58,001
in your bag
of tricks.
175
00:06:58,001 --> 00:07:00,753
I need an insignia
for an American general.
176
00:07:00,795 --> 00:07:01,671
Right, Colonel.
177
00:07:08,678 --> 00:07:11,514
Here, Colonel.
Thanks.
178
00:07:11,514 --> 00:07:14,767
( Schultz speaking German )
179
00:07:14,809 --> 00:07:16,519
Get out, get out,
get out.
180
00:07:16,561 --> 00:07:18,521
Hey, Schultz,
who's your friend?
181
00:07:18,521 --> 00:07:20,898
No chitchat.
I have to take him to the commandant.
182
00:07:20,940 --> 00:07:23,192
Oh, come on.
You can't take him to the commandant
183
00:07:23,234 --> 00:07:24,193
looking like this.
184
00:07:24,235 --> 00:07:25,653
What are you
talking about?
185
00:07:25,695 --> 00:07:27,739
Remember: name, rank
and serial number.
186
00:07:27,780 --> 00:07:29,824
That's all
you tell him. Shh.
187
00:07:29,866 --> 00:07:30,950
SCHULTZ:
No talking!
188
00:07:30,992 --> 00:07:32,785
Who's talking?
I'm whispering.
189
00:07:32,827 --> 00:07:34,704
And what
have we here?
190
00:07:34,746 --> 00:07:37,665
Herr Kommandant,
a new prisoner!
191
00:07:37,707 --> 00:07:38,666
Sound off.
192
00:07:38,708 --> 00:07:41,878
General Aloisius Barton,
United States Air Corps.
193
00:07:41,878 --> 00:07:44,547
Did you say General
Barton? Schultz!
194
00:07:46,090 --> 00:07:47,133
Impossible.
195
00:07:47,175 --> 00:07:50,094
I knew you'd
catch on, Colonel.
196
00:07:50,136 --> 00:07:51,345
It's an old American trick.
197
00:07:51,387 --> 00:07:52,805
All the fliers carry
these insignia,
198
00:07:52,847 --> 00:07:53,931
in case
they're shot down.
199
00:07:53,973 --> 00:07:55,433
They pretend
to be General Barton.
200
00:07:55,475 --> 00:07:56,976
That way they get
special treatment.
201
00:07:57,018 --> 00:07:58,061
Nice try, pal,
202
00:07:58,102 --> 00:07:59,270
but I knew
he'd catch on.
203
00:07:59,312 --> 00:08:00,521
Too smart.
204
00:08:00,563 --> 00:08:02,398
Hogan.
205
00:08:02,440 --> 00:08:05,151
Did you say they all
pretended to be...
206
00:08:05,193 --> 00:08:08,237
Oh, don't tell me
that other prisoner said he was Barton.
207
00:08:08,279 --> 00:08:11,240
Oh, that's bad.
Probably just a sergeant.
208
00:08:11,282 --> 00:08:13,451
I told the men
you had a real general.
209
00:08:13,493 --> 00:08:14,911
But he seemed
so sincere.
210
00:08:14,952 --> 00:08:16,996
And with the field marshal
coming tomorrow
211
00:08:17,038 --> 00:08:19,332
to have his picture taken
at your invitation...
212
00:08:19,373 --> 00:08:20,792
with an enlisted man.
213
00:08:20,833 --> 00:08:22,752
Look, you better
get him out of here, whoever he is,
214
00:08:22,794 --> 00:08:24,170
before the Field
Marshal comes.
215
00:08:24,212 --> 00:08:26,005
But I must be sure.
216
00:08:26,047 --> 00:08:27,173
Hogan, wait.
217
00:08:27,215 --> 00:08:29,634
You would know
a brigadier general in your own air corps.
218
00:08:29,675 --> 00:08:30,635
You could
identify him.
219
00:08:30,676 --> 00:08:31,636
Well, I mean...
220
00:08:31,677 --> 00:08:32,762
Come, let's see if
he's real or not,
221
00:08:32,762 --> 00:08:33,763
and then you tell me.
222
00:08:33,763 --> 00:08:35,014
If I can be of help,
lead on.
223
00:08:40,061 --> 00:08:41,062
( outer door clangs )
224
00:08:45,858 --> 00:08:48,736
All right, Hogan--
is this General Barton?
225
00:08:48,778 --> 00:08:50,154
Not a chance.
226
00:08:50,196 --> 00:08:51,113
What is all this?
227
00:08:51,113 --> 00:08:52,281
Nice try, pal,
228
00:08:52,281 --> 00:08:53,950
but the colonel here
knows your not Barton.
229
00:08:53,950 --> 00:08:54,992
He's going
to take you out
230
00:08:55,034 --> 00:08:56,160
of this
maximum-security cell
231
00:08:56,202 --> 00:08:57,620
and put you in
with the rest of us.
232
00:08:57,620 --> 00:08:58,621
Rubbish.
233
00:08:58,621 --> 00:09:00,873
I am General Barton
234
00:09:00,915 --> 00:09:03,709
and I'm entitled to all
the privileges of my rank.
235
00:09:03,751 --> 00:09:04,836
And just who are you?
236
00:09:04,877 --> 00:09:05,837
This is Colonel Hogan,
237
00:09:05,878 --> 00:09:07,713
ranking officer among
the prisoners here.
238
00:09:07,755 --> 00:09:11,467
Hogan? Yes, I remember you.
239
00:09:11,467 --> 00:09:15,263
You were the commanding officer
of the 504th.
240
00:09:15,304 --> 00:09:16,973
But, uh, that
was quite a while back.
241
00:09:17,014 --> 00:09:19,016
Hogan has been
a prisoner here for two years.
242
00:09:19,058 --> 00:09:20,768
Two years.
243
00:09:20,810 --> 00:09:21,769
Had many escapes?
244
00:09:21,811 --> 00:09:25,648
No one has ever
escaped from Stalag 13.
245
00:09:25,690 --> 00:09:28,234
Colonel Hogan
has been most understanding
246
00:09:28,276 --> 00:09:29,360
and cooperative.
247
00:09:29,402 --> 00:09:31,654
Oh, so that's it.
248
00:09:31,654 --> 00:09:34,156
Cooperative-- a sellout.
249
00:09:34,156 --> 00:09:37,868
It's the duty
of every officer to try to escape.
250
00:09:37,910 --> 00:09:39,829
Hogan, you're a disgrace
to the uniform.
251
00:09:39,870 --> 00:09:42,164
Get this crummy traitor
out of my sight.
252
00:09:42,164 --> 00:09:44,041
Yes, Herr General.
253
00:09:44,083 --> 00:09:45,626
Hogan!
254
00:09:50,339 --> 00:09:51,299
Now, Hogan,
255
00:09:51,340 --> 00:09:53,426
you can tell
the good news to your men.
256
00:09:53,593 --> 00:09:54,677
( sighs )
257
00:09:54,719 --> 00:09:57,430
We really do have
the real General Barton, don't we?
258
00:09:57,471 --> 00:10:02,101
Yep, that's General Barton,
all right.
259
00:10:04,312 --> 00:10:06,689
Generals.
260
00:10:06,689 --> 00:10:09,025
He really gave it
to the Colonel, huh?
261
00:10:16,032 --> 00:10:18,075
How would you feel?
262
00:10:18,117 --> 00:10:20,202
Two years
in this stinking camp,
263
00:10:20,244 --> 00:10:22,288
breaking your back
every minute
264
00:10:22,330 --> 00:10:24,832
to help other guys escape
while you stay behind?
265
00:10:24,874 --> 00:10:26,417
And then your own general,
266
00:10:26,459 --> 00:10:28,461
who you're trying to help,
calls you a traitor.
267
00:10:28,502 --> 00:10:30,421
Hey, Colonel,
268
00:10:30,463 --> 00:10:32,048
another message
from London.
269
00:10:32,048 --> 00:10:34,467
Boy, have they
been sweating.
270
00:10:34,508 --> 00:10:36,802
"Arrange escape of
Barton at any cost."
271
00:10:36,844 --> 00:10:38,304
Oh, they must be joking.
272
00:10:38,346 --> 00:10:40,639
What, him in that special cell
with all them ruddy guards?
273
00:10:40,681 --> 00:10:41,807
No, thanks.
274
00:10:41,849 --> 00:10:44,226
Need I remind you
we're still under orders?
275
00:10:44,226 --> 00:10:45,394
And this is an order.
276
00:10:45,436 --> 00:10:47,563
But the field marshal's
coming tomorrow.
277
00:10:47,605 --> 00:10:49,023
That leaves
just tonight.
278
00:10:49,065 --> 00:10:50,149
There's no time
for tunnels,
279
00:10:50,191 --> 00:10:51,192
no time for anything.
280
00:10:51,233 --> 00:10:52,360
LeBEAU:
It would seem, Colonel,
281
00:10:52,401 --> 00:10:53,402
that this time,
282
00:10:53,444 --> 00:10:55,363
there are just no more tricks
left in the bag.
283
00:10:55,404 --> 00:10:58,074
Well, it had
to come to this, sooner or later.
284
00:10:59,408 --> 00:11:00,951
Well, sure, we got
by all this time
285
00:11:00,993 --> 00:11:02,244
without anybody
getting hurt,
286
00:11:02,286 --> 00:11:03,621
but there's not one
of us here
287
00:11:03,662 --> 00:11:05,831
that hasn't known inside
that the day would come
288
00:11:05,873 --> 00:11:06,916
we'd have to lay it
on the line.
289
00:11:06,957 --> 00:11:08,793
Well, is that it then?
290
00:11:08,834 --> 00:11:09,752
A direct attack?
291
00:11:09,794 --> 00:11:11,962
Yeah, I wish there
was some other way.
292
00:11:12,004 --> 00:11:12,713
This time...
293
00:11:23,307 --> 00:11:25,476
A lousy pistol.
294
00:11:25,518 --> 00:11:27,061
I'd rather swap it for a tank.
295
00:11:27,103 --> 00:11:30,648
Wait a minute.
296
00:11:30,689 --> 00:11:31,941
That's it.
297
00:11:31,982 --> 00:11:32,733
That's it, what?
298
00:11:32,775 --> 00:11:35,111
A swap.
299
00:11:35,152 --> 00:11:36,529
We'll give them
a German general
300
00:11:36,570 --> 00:11:38,239
for an American general--
an even swap.
301
00:11:38,280 --> 00:11:41,492
But, Colonel, we don't seem
to have a German general in stock.
302
00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:43,244
But we will have--
303
00:11:43,285 --> 00:11:44,453
Field Marshal
von Heinke.
304
00:11:44,495 --> 00:11:46,622
When he arrives tomorrow,
we capture him.
305
00:11:46,664 --> 00:11:48,791
Us prisoners,
of the Germans,
306
00:11:48,833 --> 00:11:51,710
are going to capture
a German general?
307
00:11:51,752 --> 00:11:53,504
Exactly.
308
00:11:53,546 --> 00:11:55,381
I knew you'd
understand.
309
00:12:27,621 --> 00:12:29,081
( soldier grunting )
310
00:12:30,833 --> 00:12:31,834
( grunts )
311
00:12:33,919 --> 00:12:36,171
( British accent ):
A little present from the British commandos.
312
00:12:38,173 --> 00:12:40,968
I'll handle the English
accent, if you don't mind.
313
00:12:41,010 --> 00:12:42,553
HOGAN:
All right, give us a hand, come on.
314
00:12:42,595 --> 00:12:43,554
Let's get him
into the trunk.
315
00:12:43,596 --> 00:12:44,555
LeBEAU:
Why in the trunk?
316
00:12:44,597 --> 00:12:45,681
We want him inside
the camp, don't we?
317
00:12:45,681 --> 00:12:46,515
Right.
318
00:12:50,060 --> 00:12:52,521
Let them make
the deliveries.
319
00:13:00,529 --> 00:13:02,531
( tires squealing )
320
00:13:03,490 --> 00:13:06,827
( yelling in German )
321
00:13:06,869 --> 00:13:08,495
General von Heinke
has been captured
322
00:13:08,537 --> 00:13:09,872
by the British commandos!
323
00:13:09,872 --> 00:13:10,873
Sound the alarm!
324
00:13:10,914 --> 00:13:11,707
Get into formation!
325
00:13:11,749 --> 00:13:12,708
Schultz!
326
00:13:12,708 --> 00:13:13,876
Schultz!
327
00:13:13,959 --> 00:13:14,918
Release the dogs!
328
00:13:14,960 --> 00:13:17,171
I don't want to leave
a stone unturned!
329
00:13:17,212 --> 00:13:17,963
( dogs barking )
330
00:13:18,005 --> 00:13:19,423
Schultz!
331
00:13:19,465 --> 00:13:21,008
KLINK:
We'll show them a thing or two!
332
00:13:21,050 --> 00:13:23,052
I want every one of those
commandos caught
333
00:13:23,052 --> 00:13:24,386
and brought
into my office!
334
00:13:24,386 --> 00:13:25,387
Sergeant Schultz!
335
00:13:25,429 --> 00:13:26,597
Where is Sergeant Schultz?
336
00:13:26,639 --> 00:13:28,057
Get Sergeant Schultz!
337
00:13:28,057 --> 00:13:29,224
Sergeant Schultz!
338
00:13:29,266 --> 00:13:30,851
Get Sergeant... Schultz!
339
00:13:30,893 --> 00:13:32,186
Where have you been?!
340
00:13:32,227 --> 00:13:35,272
On the Hammelburg Road--
he'll show you. Let's go.
341
00:13:35,314 --> 00:13:36,398
Jawohl, Herr Kommandant!
342
00:13:36,398 --> 00:13:38,525
( shouting in German )
343
00:13:42,196 --> 00:13:45,574
I said all prisoners
in the barracks!
344
00:13:49,328 --> 00:13:50,913
Boy, they're sure
in a stew over at Klink's.
345
00:13:50,913 --> 00:13:52,247
I'll-I'll bet you half
of the generals
346
00:13:52,289 --> 00:13:53,749
in Germany are
there by now.
347
00:13:53,999 --> 00:13:55,626
Kinch?
348
00:13:55,667 --> 00:13:57,169
Yeah, Colonel?
349
00:13:57,211 --> 00:13:58,170
How's our friend feeling?
350
00:13:58,212 --> 00:14:00,047
Oh, he's still out cold.
351
00:14:02,591 --> 00:14:04,009
He'll never go
for the swap.
352
00:14:04,051 --> 00:14:05,219
He'll know
he's still in Germany.
353
00:14:05,260 --> 00:14:07,513
That's why we're going
to fly him back to England.
354
00:14:07,554 --> 00:14:08,680
Fly him back to England?!
355
00:14:08,722 --> 00:14:10,432
In what?
356
00:14:13,685 --> 00:14:15,020
In that.
357
00:14:27,282 --> 00:14:28,283
Hi, Schultz!
358
00:14:28,283 --> 00:14:29,576
Halt! Who goes...?
359
00:14:29,618 --> 00:14:30,786
Axis Sally.
360
00:14:30,828 --> 00:14:32,621
Axis Sally?!
361
00:14:34,164 --> 00:14:36,125
How you doing, Schultz?
362
00:14:36,166 --> 00:14:38,919
Did they, uh, find
the field marshal yet?
363
00:14:38,961 --> 00:14:39,962
Nein! But you
shouldn't be outside.
364
00:14:39,962 --> 00:14:41,004
Well, I'm sorry.
365
00:14:41,046 --> 00:14:43,298
I just couldn't sleep
worrying about him, that's all.
366
00:14:43,340 --> 00:14:45,342
You know, Schultz,
it's really too bad
367
00:14:45,384 --> 00:14:47,010
they didn't have somebody
like you guarding him.
368
00:14:47,052 --> 00:14:48,303
This never
would've happened.
369
00:14:48,303 --> 00:14:49,471
( chuckles )
370
00:14:49,471 --> 00:14:50,806
If Schultz would
have guarded him,
371
00:14:50,806 --> 00:14:53,433
nothing would
have happened.
372
00:14:53,475 --> 00:14:54,643
Eyes like an eagle, Schultz.
373
00:14:54,643 --> 00:14:56,436
Just like an eagle.
374
00:14:56,478 --> 00:15:00,149
Nothing gets past
Schultz. Nothing!
375
00:15:00,190 --> 00:15:03,318
SCHULTZ:
I would like to see anybody try it.
376
00:15:03,318 --> 00:15:04,486
Not me, Schultz.
377
00:15:04,528 --> 00:15:05,654
Old eagle eye--
( chuckles )
378
00:15:05,654 --> 00:15:07,197
Not a chance.
Hey, you like chocolate?
379
00:15:07,239 --> 00:15:08,407
Hmm?
380
00:15:08,448 --> 00:15:10,117
Now and then.
381
00:15:10,159 --> 00:15:12,119
How about a little bit
for now then, huh?
382
00:15:12,160 --> 00:15:14,079
Yeah.
383
00:15:27,593 --> 00:15:29,011
Shh! Shh!
384
00:15:33,891 --> 00:15:35,475
( engines thrumming )
385
00:15:40,814 --> 00:15:42,983
Hey, I think he's
coming around.
386
00:15:43,025 --> 00:15:44,484
Good, good.
387
00:15:44,526 --> 00:15:46,653
What happened?
388
00:15:46,695 --> 00:15:48,155
Where am I?
389
00:15:48,196 --> 00:15:50,532
Who are you?
390
00:15:50,532 --> 00:15:53,410
Colonel Foster,
Intelligence.
391
00:15:53,452 --> 00:15:55,579
Yeah, we should be just about
over the coast of Dover now.
392
00:15:55,621 --> 00:15:56,622
Right.
393
00:15:56,663 --> 00:15:57,789
Dover?
394
00:15:57,831 --> 00:15:59,708
England?!
395
00:15:59,708 --> 00:16:01,043
Uh-huh.
396
00:16:04,004 --> 00:16:06,548
Yeah, there are
the lights now.
397
00:16:06,548 --> 00:16:08,884
Yes, indeedy,
a beautiful sight.
398
00:16:23,273 --> 00:16:26,234
( record scratching )
399
00:16:26,234 --> 00:16:28,695
( engine thrummingresumes )
400
00:16:31,448 --> 00:16:32,449
All right, here we go.
401
00:16:32,491 --> 00:16:34,326
Now raise your leg.
Up, up, up, that's it.
402
00:16:34,368 --> 00:16:36,078
You'll pardon the blindfold,
sir, but you understand--
403
00:16:36,119 --> 00:16:37,204
this underground hangar
404
00:16:37,245 --> 00:16:38,413
is one of the most
secret bases in England.
405
00:16:38,413 --> 00:16:39,915
You don't have to explain.
406
00:16:39,956 --> 00:16:41,083
All right.
407
00:16:41,124 --> 00:16:45,921
Set up radio contact
with Germany.
408
00:16:45,962 --> 00:16:47,923
Inform them the field marshal's
our prisoner.
409
00:16:47,923 --> 00:16:49,800
Right, sir.
410
00:16:49,841 --> 00:16:50,801
( sighs )
411
00:16:50,842 --> 00:16:52,594
I think you'll be
comfortable here awhile.
412
00:16:52,594 --> 00:16:55,430
It's about what I would
expect in an English camp.
413
00:16:55,472 --> 00:16:57,099
We would never
keep our prisoners
414
00:16:57,140 --> 00:17:00,685
in a pigpen like this.
415
00:17:00,727 --> 00:17:02,604
Well, there is
a war on, you know.
416
00:17:02,604 --> 00:17:05,399
Gentlemen, this is most
embarrassing.
417
00:17:05,440 --> 00:17:07,275
In broad daylight...
418
00:17:07,275 --> 00:17:08,944
I still think we should send
a squad to look...
419
00:17:08,985 --> 00:17:10,070
Shut up, Klink.
420
00:17:10,112 --> 00:17:12,447
Right in the
middle of Germany.
421
00:17:12,489 --> 00:17:13,657
And not a trace of him.
422
00:17:13,698 --> 00:17:15,325
Well, this never would've
happened had I...
423
00:17:15,367 --> 00:17:18,412
Klink, he could be
anywhere by now.
424
00:17:18,453 --> 00:17:19,496
Yes, Herr General.
425
00:17:19,538 --> 00:17:21,289
Uh, General, may I suggest that
we possibly...
426
00:17:21,289 --> 00:17:23,291
Be careful you don't
suggest yourself
427
00:17:23,291 --> 00:17:25,419
all the way
to the Russian front.
428
00:17:25,460 --> 00:17:26,461
Yes, sir.
429
00:17:26,503 --> 00:17:27,462
Now make your rounds.
430
00:17:27,504 --> 00:17:28,713
My rounds.
431
00:17:28,755 --> 00:17:29,840
Rounds?
432
00:17:29,881 --> 00:17:31,425
Oh, yes, Herr General,
I was just about
433
00:17:31,466 --> 00:17:33,260
to go to make my rounds.
434
00:17:35,345 --> 00:17:38,098
Now, we have cut
them off here,
435
00:17:38,140 --> 00:17:40,267
we have cut
them off there,
436
00:17:40,308 --> 00:17:42,978
now we must
block them here.
437
00:17:42,978 --> 00:17:45,147
Very good, Herr General.
438
00:17:56,158 --> 00:17:57,993
( British accent ):
Contact ready with Germany, sir.
439
00:17:58,326 --> 00:17:59,703
The Allied chief suggests
440
00:17:59,744 --> 00:18:03,498
we offer an exchange of this
prisoner for General Barton.
441
00:18:03,540 --> 00:18:05,333
Are they out
of their minds?
442
00:18:05,333 --> 00:18:07,794
The Germans would never
give up a big man like Barton
443
00:18:07,836 --> 00:18:09,212
for just
a von Clanky here.
444
00:18:09,254 --> 00:18:12,382
Von Heinke, Heinke,
not Clanky.
445
00:18:12,424 --> 00:18:13,383
All right, whatever.
446
00:18:13,425 --> 00:18:14,634
It wouldn't work.
447
00:18:14,676 --> 00:18:16,887
Who'd want to swap steak
for a hamburger?
448
00:18:16,928 --> 00:18:19,139
Hamburger?
449
00:18:19,181 --> 00:18:21,725
Colonel, I am a field marshal.
450
00:18:21,766 --> 00:18:24,352
I have the Iron Cross,
First Class,
451
00:18:24,394 --> 00:18:26,855
the Goering citation
and the Knight's Cross
452
00:18:26,897 --> 00:18:29,524
with Oak Leaves
and Swords.
453
00:18:29,566 --> 00:18:33,069
That Barton, hmph!
Just another pilot.
454
00:18:33,111 --> 00:18:34,696
I am von Heinke.
455
00:18:34,738 --> 00:18:36,406
Yeah, well, whatever.
456
00:18:36,448 --> 00:18:38,700
You will see.
457
00:18:38,700 --> 00:18:39,826
They will insist
on the exchange.
458
00:18:39,868 --> 00:18:42,996
I will speak to them on
your radio, personally.
459
00:18:43,038 --> 00:18:45,540
Well, if you insist,
be my guest.
460
00:18:49,711 --> 00:18:50,962
Schultz!
461
00:18:51,004 --> 00:18:52,756
What is going
on here?
462
00:18:52,797 --> 00:18:53,882
Herr Kommandant,
463
00:18:53,924 --> 00:18:55,216
I am watching
the American airplane
464
00:18:55,216 --> 00:18:58,261
with the eyes of an eagle.
465
00:19:00,388 --> 00:19:02,390
Dummkopf! What plane?
466
00:19:02,432 --> 00:19:03,725
That one. That...
467
00:19:05,143 --> 00:19:07,562
Schultz, do you have
an explanation?
468
00:19:07,562 --> 00:19:10,148
Herr Kommandant,
I will have to report,
469
00:19:10,190 --> 00:19:12,859
Herr Kommandant,
that if it pleases Herr Kommandant...
470
00:19:12,901 --> 00:19:15,570
Mm! This is another trick
of Hogan's to embarrass me
471
00:19:15,570 --> 00:19:18,448
in front of
General Burkhalter.
472
00:19:18,490 --> 00:19:19,741
This is von Heinke.
473
00:19:19,783 --> 00:19:23,119
I order you to make immediate
arrangements for my exchange.
474
00:19:23,161 --> 00:19:24,788
( whistling outside )
475
00:19:26,164 --> 00:19:27,165
Where's Colonel Hogan?
476
00:19:27,207 --> 00:19:28,249
I don't know, sir.
477
00:19:32,504 --> 00:19:33,463
Herr Colonel?
478
00:19:33,505 --> 00:19:34,589
Yes, what is it?
479
00:19:34,631 --> 00:19:36,132
You are wanted in your
office immediately.
480
00:19:36,174 --> 00:19:39,177
Communications has
notified us that London is calling on the radio.
481
00:19:39,219 --> 00:19:41,763
London?
482
00:19:41,805 --> 00:19:43,306
Huh!
483
00:19:49,562 --> 00:19:51,564
Field Marshal, would you
mind repeating that again,
484
00:19:51,606 --> 00:19:53,149
just to be sure?
485
00:19:53,191 --> 00:19:56,152
I order you to make immediate
arrangements for my exchange.
486
00:19:56,194 --> 00:19:58,154
Those are my orders.
487
00:19:58,196 --> 00:19:59,823
Carry them out.
488
00:19:59,864 --> 00:20:00,990
Such a loud signal.
489
00:20:01,032 --> 00:20:04,411
The English must have an
excellent transmitter.
490
00:20:04,452 --> 00:20:06,830
We have
an excellent receiver.
491
00:20:06,871 --> 00:20:10,125
HOGAN ( as Colonel Foster ):
That was Field Marshal von Heinke.
492
00:20:10,125 --> 00:20:12,794
May we have your reply
immediately?
493
00:20:12,794 --> 00:20:15,505
I guess we have
no choice.
494
00:20:15,547 --> 00:20:19,134
That voice, I have heard it
somewhere before.
495
00:20:19,175 --> 00:20:20,677
Certainly, Dummkopf.
496
00:20:20,718 --> 00:20:22,137
That's von Heinke.
497
00:20:22,137 --> 00:20:24,347
KLINK:
Herr General, the other voice, it...
498
00:20:24,389 --> 00:20:25,849
Hogan.
499
00:20:25,890 --> 00:20:28,143
that's Hogan!
( buzzer sounds )
500
00:20:28,184 --> 00:20:29,978
Ooh, Hogan.
501
00:20:30,019 --> 00:20:31,438
Sir.
502
00:20:31,479 --> 00:20:32,730
One of my prisoners
right here!
503
00:20:32,772 --> 00:20:35,525
Be right back.
504
00:20:35,567 --> 00:20:38,653
Now, gentlemen, I'm convinced
that something is wrong.
505
00:20:38,653 --> 00:20:41,030
General Burkhalter,
with all due respect to you,
506
00:20:41,072 --> 00:20:44,993
I think this could be
a false message.
507
00:20:44,993 --> 00:20:46,077
A false message.
508
00:20:46,119 --> 00:20:47,328
Yes, sir.
509
00:20:47,370 --> 00:20:49,456
Now, it would take me
510
00:20:49,497 --> 00:20:51,499
just one minute
to find...
511
00:20:51,541 --> 00:20:52,417
Hogan?!
512
00:20:52,459 --> 00:20:53,460
Yes?
513
00:20:53,501 --> 00:20:56,838
You thought he was
on the radio?
514
00:20:56,838 --> 00:20:57,964
What are you doing here?
515
00:20:58,006 --> 00:20:58,673
Sergeant Schultz told me
516
00:20:58,715 --> 00:20:59,799
one of our planes was missing.
517
00:20:59,841 --> 00:21:02,760
Klink, what is this?
518
00:21:02,802 --> 00:21:04,971
General, I still think
it is possible
519
00:21:05,013 --> 00:21:08,349
that that message on the radio
was not the genuine article.
520
00:21:08,391 --> 00:21:11,394
NEWKIRK ( imitating Churchill ):
Generals of the Third Reich,
521
00:21:11,436 --> 00:21:15,356
this is the prime minister
speaking.
522
00:21:15,398 --> 00:21:17,609
We offer you this exchange
523
00:21:17,650 --> 00:21:20,695
with the full expectation
524
00:21:20,737 --> 00:21:24,365
that you will comply
in an honorable manner.
525
00:21:24,407 --> 00:21:27,827
We in turn assure you
526
00:21:27,869 --> 00:21:33,374
that we will fulfill our
part of the bargain.
527
00:21:33,416 --> 00:21:37,462
We await your
immediate reply
528
00:21:37,503 --> 00:21:41,382
in order that we may speedily
529
00:21:41,424 --> 00:21:44,552
affect this arrangement
530
00:21:44,552 --> 00:21:48,348
to our mutual
satisfaction.
531
00:21:51,559 --> 00:21:56,356
Notify communications,
we accept--
532
00:21:56,397 --> 00:22:00,360
unless, Colonel, you think
that was Hogan, too?
533
00:22:04,530 --> 00:22:05,907
Any trouble with von Heinke?
534
00:22:05,907 --> 00:22:07,575
No, we took him out
through the tunnel.
535
00:22:07,575 --> 00:22:08,910
We left him with
the underground.
536
00:22:08,910 --> 00:22:10,828
They'll notify the Krauts
where to pick him up,
537
00:22:10,870 --> 00:22:12,038
soon as Barton
takes off.
538
00:22:12,080 --> 00:22:13,414
He's so full
of sleeping pills,
539
00:22:13,456 --> 00:22:15,041
he'll never know
he never left home.
540
00:22:15,083 --> 00:22:17,377
What time's London going
to send the plane for Barton?
541
00:22:17,418 --> 00:22:18,920
Well, it's due
to land any minute.
542
00:22:18,920 --> 00:22:20,421
So that's the setup,
General.
543
00:22:20,421 --> 00:22:22,966
Maybe I shouldn't
speak up like this, but...
544
00:22:23,007 --> 00:22:24,425
well, I just wanted
you to know
545
00:22:24,425 --> 00:22:26,010
how we all feel
about Colonel Hogan.
546
00:22:26,052 --> 00:22:27,971
And you can't put me
in jail for it 'cause,
547
00:22:28,012 --> 00:22:29,722
legally speaking,
I'm in jail already.
548
00:22:29,764 --> 00:22:31,599
That's all, Newkirk.
549
00:22:37,897 --> 00:22:39,232
Hogan.
550
00:22:39,273 --> 00:22:40,191
Colonel Hogan.
551
00:23:00,253 --> 00:23:01,212
( knocking )
552
00:23:01,254 --> 00:23:02,255
Come in.
553
00:23:02,296 --> 00:23:03,464
You wanted
to see me, Colonel?
554
00:23:03,506 --> 00:23:04,549
Yes, Hogan, I do.
555
00:23:04,632 --> 00:23:05,883
Now before I call
General Burkhalter
556
00:23:05,925 --> 00:23:07,009
and start a thorough
investigation,
557
00:23:07,051 --> 00:23:08,302
I want to ask
some questions.
558
00:23:08,302 --> 00:23:09,512
Aw, come on.
It's pretty late.
559
00:23:09,554 --> 00:23:10,346
Can't this wait
till tomorrow?
560
00:23:10,388 --> 00:23:11,639
Silence!
561
00:23:11,639 --> 00:23:13,349
I want some answers
and I want them now.
562
00:23:13,391 --> 00:23:14,475
What seems to be
the problem?
563
00:23:14,517 --> 00:23:17,854
Hogan, does it not
seem strange to you
564
00:23:17,895 --> 00:23:19,313
that a field marshal
565
00:23:19,355 --> 00:23:21,357
is kidnapped
in the middle of Germany?
566
00:23:21,399 --> 00:23:22,775
That has
bothered me, sir.
567
00:23:22,817 --> 00:23:23,818
Mm-hmm.
568
00:23:23,860 --> 00:23:25,486
And does it not
seem strange to you
569
00:23:25,486 --> 00:23:29,615
that a captured airplane
disappears and then reappears?
570
00:23:29,657 --> 00:23:31,701
Well, it has been
rather windy, sir.
571
00:23:31,743 --> 00:23:34,746
And does it not seem
extremely strange to you
572
00:23:34,787 --> 00:23:37,582
that Prime Minister Churchill
would drop everything
573
00:23:37,623 --> 00:23:39,917
to send a personal message?
574
00:23:39,959 --> 00:23:41,711
You're absolutely
right.
575
00:23:41,752 --> 00:23:43,754
Now, I'm going to give you
exactly five...
576
00:23:43,796 --> 00:23:45,465
You agree with me?
577
00:23:45,506 --> 00:23:46,841
Mm-hmm.
578
00:23:46,841 --> 00:23:48,968
Now that you point it out,
sir, I see what you mean.
579
00:23:49,010 --> 00:23:49,802
This whole thing
was rigged.
580
00:23:49,844 --> 00:23:50,845
It was obviously
an act.
581
00:23:50,845 --> 00:23:52,388
Well, yes.
582
00:23:52,430 --> 00:23:54,599
But you were smart enough
to see through it.
583
00:23:54,640 --> 00:23:55,892
Von Heinke was
never captured.
584
00:23:55,933 --> 00:23:57,477
No, he was never captured.
585
00:23:57,518 --> 00:23:59,103
Von Heinke was
getting too big.
586
00:23:59,145 --> 00:24:02,273
He was obviously out
for Goering's job.
587
00:24:02,315 --> 00:24:04,358
Goering got wise,
so he and his pal Himmler
588
00:24:04,400 --> 00:24:06,027
rigged this whole thing.
589
00:24:06,068 --> 00:24:07,361
Himmler? Goering?
590
00:24:07,403 --> 00:24:09,197
I'm surprised at
your courage, sir,
591
00:24:09,238 --> 00:24:11,199
in going through with
this investigation.
592
00:24:11,240 --> 00:24:12,783
I didn't think
you'd do it.
593
00:24:12,825 --> 00:24:15,203
I just wish I could be
there when you come
594
00:24:15,203 --> 00:24:17,997
face-to-face with Goering
and Himmler with your charges.
595
00:24:18,039 --> 00:24:20,291
Yes, sir, a day
to be remembered.
596
00:24:22,084 --> 00:24:23,920
Get General Burkhalter
for Colonel Klink.
597
00:24:23,961 --> 00:24:25,796
He has an urgent
report to make.
598
00:24:25,838 --> 00:24:27,507
Cancel that call.
599
00:24:27,548 --> 00:24:29,967
When General Burkhalter
said the case was closed,
600
00:24:30,009 --> 00:24:31,719
he meant it was closed.
601
00:24:31,761 --> 00:24:33,221
My hat's off
to you, sir.
602
00:24:33,221 --> 00:24:34,722
You put the country
before yourself.
603
00:24:34,764 --> 00:24:37,183
A scandal like this could
destroy the Third Reich.
604
00:24:37,225 --> 00:24:38,684
I just hope they
appreciate you.
605
00:24:38,726 --> 00:24:40,144
I know we do.
606
00:24:40,186 --> 00:24:41,020
Oh, thank you, Hogan.
607
00:24:41,070 --> 00:24:45,620
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