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1
00:00:02,069 --> 00:00:04,002
SEVEN, FIVE, FOUR, NINE.
2
00:00:04,071 --> 00:00:06,605
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
3
00:00:06,673 --> 00:00:09,141
GOOD MORNING,
JENNIFER. MR. CARLSON.
4
00:00:09,209 --> 00:00:12,077
PRUSSIAN VALLEY MILITARY
ACADEMY JUST CALLED.
5
00:00:12,145 --> 00:00:15,414
- OH?
- YOUR SON IS MISSING.
6
00:00:15,483 --> 00:00:19,317
- MISSING?
- NOW, I'M SURE THERE'S
NO CAUSE FOR ALARM.
7
00:00:19,386 --> 00:00:22,766
WELL, WHAT DID THEY SAY? THEY SAID HE
MUST HAVE LEFT SOMETIME DURING THE NIGHT.
8
00:00:22,790 --> 00:00:25,757
OH, NO. YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO CALL
THE COMMANDANT AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
9
00:00:25,826 --> 00:00:27,759
UH, YEAH. YEAH, SURE.
10
00:00:28,895 --> 00:00:31,330
MISSING? HOW OLD IS HE?
11
00:00:31,398 --> 00:00:35,266
HE'S ONLY 11 YEARS OLD. WELL, I'M
SURE THAT HE'S GOING TO BE JUST FINE.
12
00:00:35,336 --> 00:00:38,269
I'M SURE THAT HE'S GONNA BE
OKAY TOO, BUT I BETTER CALL MY WIFE.
13
00:00:38,338 --> 00:00:42,941
- THAT WON'T
BE NECESSARY, ARTHUR.
- MAMA, WHAT ARE YOU DOIN' HERE?
14
00:00:43,010 --> 00:00:45,276
- HANG UP, ARTHUR.
- BUT, MOM, I...
15
00:00:45,346 --> 00:00:47,346
HANG UP.
16
00:00:50,116 --> 00:00:53,518
- HELLO, JENNIFER.
- HELLO, MRS. CARLSON.
17
00:00:53,587 --> 00:00:55,621
MOTHER, LITTLE
ARTHUR IS MISSING.
18
00:00:55,689 --> 00:00:58,756
- NO, HE'S NOT.
- PRUSSIAN VALLEY JUST CALLED.
19
00:00:58,825 --> 00:01:00,321
HE HAS LEFT PRUSSIAN VALLEY.
20
00:01:00,345 --> 00:01:02,727
THAT'S WHAT I JUST SAID.
BUT WHERE DID HE GO?
21
00:01:02,796 --> 00:01:05,096
WELL, NATURALLY, HE CAME TO ME.
22
00:01:05,165 --> 00:01:07,932
OH.
23
00:01:09,003 --> 00:01:11,302
LITTLE ARTHUR.
24
00:01:12,973 --> 00:01:14,906
HELLO, FATHER.
25
00:01:17,978 --> 00:01:20,879
- ARTHUR, ARE YOU OKAY?
- I'M FINE. HI.
26
00:01:24,452 --> 00:01:26,852
HELLO. HOW'S IT GOING?
27
00:01:26,921 --> 00:01:29,922
UH, I THINK I'D BETTER
GO CALL THE SCHOOL.
28
00:01:29,990 --> 00:01:32,190
GOOD IDEA. EXCUSE ME.
29
00:01:38,165 --> 00:01:40,465
ARTHUR, WE HAVE SOME
DECISIONS TO MAKE.
30
00:01:40,534 --> 00:01:43,101
WELL, I THINK I DESERVE
AN EXPLANATION.
31
00:01:43,170 --> 00:01:46,071
OH, HE'S EXPLAINED IT ALL TO ME.
HE'S NOT GOING BACK TO SCHOOL.
32
00:01:46,140 --> 00:01:50,108
BUT HE LOVED IT UP THERE. I HAD TO BRIBE
HIM TO GET HIM HOME FOR CHRISTMAS VACATION.
33
00:01:50,177 --> 00:01:55,146
ARTHUR, YOUR SON WAS PASSED
OVER FOR REGIMENTAL COMMANDER.
34
00:01:56,216 --> 00:01:58,583
OH, YEAH? WELL, HE'S ONLY 11.
35
00:01:58,652 --> 00:02:00,586
HE CAN BE REGIMENTAL
COMMANDER NEXT YEAR.
36
00:02:00,654 --> 00:02:04,022
NEXT YEAR? NEXT YEAR, HE SAYS!
DID YOU HEAR THAT? NEXT YEAR!
37
00:02:04,090 --> 00:02:07,359
OH!
38
00:02:07,428 --> 00:02:11,697
- TEMPER, TEMPER.
- GOOD BOY.
39
00:02:11,765 --> 00:02:14,299
GOOD BOY. I THINK THE FIRST
THING WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO DO...
40
00:02:14,368 --> 00:02:17,035
IS GET HIM BACK UP TO SCHOOL
AS SOON AS WE POSSIBLY CAN.
41
00:02:17,104 --> 00:02:19,737
- HE'S NOT GOING BACK.
- WHY NOT?
42
00:02:19,806 --> 00:02:23,575
ARTHUR, YOUR SON HAS
RESIGNED THE ACADEMY.
43
00:02:23,644 --> 00:02:26,645
♪♪
44
00:02:29,583 --> 00:02:31,517
RESIGNED THE ACADEMY?
45
00:02:31,585 --> 00:02:34,586
♪♪
46
00:02:35,923 --> 00:02:38,123
FOR THE TIME BEING,
HE'LL BE LIVING WITH ME.
47
00:02:38,192 --> 00:02:40,559
OH, I SEE. WELL, IF YOU
INSIST ON THAT, THEN...
48
00:02:40,627 --> 00:02:45,096
AND WORK UP HERE.
49
00:02:45,165 --> 00:02:47,098
UP HERE? YES.
50
00:02:47,167 --> 00:02:49,100
OH, GOOD.
51
00:02:49,169 --> 00:02:52,170
♪♪
52
00:02:53,373 --> 00:02:57,409
♪ BABY IF YOU'VE EVER WONDERED ♪
53
00:02:57,478 --> 00:03:01,713
♪ WONDERED WHATEVER
BECAME OF ME ♪
54
00:03:01,781 --> 00:03:05,116
♪ I'M LIVING ON THE
AIR IN CINCINNATI ♪
55
00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:10,755
♪ CINCINNATI, WKRP ♪
56
00:03:10,824 --> 00:03:14,392
♪ GOT KIND OF TIRED OF
PACKING AND UNPACKING ♪
57
00:03:14,461 --> 00:03:17,929
♪ TOWN TO TOWN UP
AND DOWN THE DIAL ♪
58
00:03:19,799 --> 00:03:22,934
♪ MAYBE YOU AND ME
WERE NEVER MEANT TO BE ♪
59
00:03:23,003 --> 00:03:27,105
♪ JUST MAYBE THINK
OF ME ONCE IN A WHILE ♪
60
00:03:27,174 --> 00:03:29,807
♪ I'M AT WKRP ♪
61
00:03:29,876 --> 00:03:33,678
♪ IN CINCINNATI ♪♪
62
00:03:36,583 --> 00:03:39,384
LOOK, MOTHER, ARTHUR
CAN'T WORK UP HERE.
63
00:03:39,453 --> 00:03:41,920
HE'S SUPPOSED TO BE IN
SCHOOL. I MEAN, THAT'S THE LAW.
64
00:03:41,989 --> 00:03:44,467
OH, A LITTLE TIME AWAY FROM
SCHOOL WON'T MAKE ANY DIFFERENCE.
65
00:03:44,491 --> 00:03:49,394
- AW, GOSH. I DON'T KNOW.
- ARTHUR, WKRP IS
A FAMILY BUSINESS.
66
00:03:49,462 --> 00:03:51,396
NOW, I WANT LITTLE
ARTHUR TO LEARN IT.
67
00:03:51,464 --> 00:03:54,632
YEAH, BUT HE DOESN'T LIKE RADIO.
HE LIKES WAR. ISN'T THAT RIGHT, SON?
68
00:03:54,701 --> 00:03:56,735
AFFIRMATIVE.
69
00:03:56,803 --> 00:03:58,937
YEAH, SEE?
70
00:03:59,006 --> 00:04:01,873
TELL YOU WHAT. WHEN, UH... WHEN
SCHOOL'S OUT, IF YOU'RE REAL, REAL GOOD,
71
00:04:01,942 --> 00:04:05,110
MAYBE GRANDMA'LL GET YOU
A NICE SUMMER JOB WITH NATO.
72
00:04:07,714 --> 00:04:09,647
ARTHUR, I'VE GOT TO GO.
73
00:04:09,716 --> 00:04:11,650
COME ON, MOTHER.
THIS ISN'T GONNA WORK.
74
00:04:11,718 --> 00:04:16,788
ARTHUR, THIS CHILD HAS JUST
HAD A TRAUMATIC CAREER SETBACK.
75
00:04:16,857 --> 00:04:19,424
NOW HE NEEDS TIME
TO REST AND REFLECT.
76
00:04:19,493 --> 00:04:21,926
THIS IS JUST AN 11-YEAR-OLD
CHILD WE'RE TALKING ABOUT.
77
00:04:21,995 --> 00:04:26,164
OH, FIND SOMETHING FOR HIM TO DO
AROUND HERE. IT'S JUST TEMPORARY.
78
00:04:26,233 --> 00:04:29,101
LITTLE ARTHUR, I'LL
PICK YOU UP AT 5:00.
79
00:04:29,169 --> 00:04:31,870
NOW, BE PLEASANT TO THE
HELP AND DON'T GET DIRTY.
80
00:04:31,938 --> 00:04:33,817
OKAY? YES, MA'AM.
81
00:04:33,841 --> 00:04:36,441
THE SAME GOES FOR YOU.
82
00:04:37,477 --> 00:04:39,477
MOM!
83
00:04:43,484 --> 00:04:45,483
SO.
84
00:04:45,552 --> 00:04:47,519
SORRY ABOUT SCHOOL.
85
00:04:47,587 --> 00:04:50,255
YOU SURE YOU WOULDN'T BE
HAPPIER HOME WITH MOTHER AND ME?
86
00:04:50,324 --> 00:04:54,292
- I LIKE IT UP AT GRANDMA'S.
- YEAH, I KNOW, BUT YOU CAN
HAVE A LOT MORE FUN AT HOME.
87
00:04:54,361 --> 00:04:58,129
YOU MIND IF I COME IN? GREAT. I WANNA
TALK TO YOU ABOUT THE WAY THIS...
88
00:05:00,367 --> 00:05:02,300
SO LONG. UH, JOHNNY.
89
00:05:02,369 --> 00:05:06,204
I'D LIKE FOR YOU TO MEET MY SON.
THIS IS LITTLE ARTHUR. OH, YEAH?
90
00:05:06,273 --> 00:05:09,118
ARTHUR, I'D LIKE FOR YOU TO MEET
DR. JOHNNY FEVER. HE'S A DISK JOCKEY.
91
00:05:09,142 --> 00:05:11,242
HI. I'M THE MORNING MAN.
92
00:05:12,313 --> 00:05:14,680
THEN, UH, SHOULDN'T
YOU BE ON THE AIR?
93
00:05:14,748 --> 00:05:17,949
WELL, I GOT A LONG RECORD PLAYING.
SEE, I KNOW ABOUT HOW LONG...
94
00:05:18,017 --> 00:05:20,084
WHAT IF THE RECORD
PLAYER BREAKS DOWN?
95
00:05:20,153 --> 00:05:23,233
HMM? WHAT IF THE
RECORD GETS STUCK?
96
00:05:23,290 --> 00:05:26,725
OH, WELL, SEE, THAT DOESN'T
USUALLY... IT'S A POSSIBILITY, ISN'T IT?
97
00:05:26,793 --> 00:05:29,939
WELL, YEAH. IT'S POSSIBLE. IT
COULD HAPPEN, COULDN'T IT?
98
00:05:29,963 --> 00:05:32,998
- I SUPPOSE IT COULD, YEAH.
- YOU'RE NOT AT YOUR POST,
ARE YOU?
99
00:05:33,066 --> 00:05:35,733
MY POST?
100
00:05:35,802 --> 00:05:37,869
WHAT DID YOU WANT, JOHNNY?
101
00:05:37,938 --> 00:05:40,438
I DON'T KNOW. I FORGOT.
102
00:05:40,506 --> 00:05:42,840
AND GET A SHAVE!
103
00:05:42,909 --> 00:05:46,077
HOW'D YOU LIKE TO DIE,
SHORTY? UH, NO, NO, NO.
104
00:05:50,317 --> 00:05:52,917
JUST WAIT A MINUTE.
CAN'T WE BE FRIENDS HERE?
105
00:05:52,986 --> 00:05:56,254
NOW, JOHNNY, UH, EXCUSE
US, PLEASE, HUH? OKAY.
106
00:05:56,323 --> 00:05:58,689
- AND GET A HAIRCUT, MISTER!
- OH!
107
00:05:58,759 --> 00:06:00,869
THAT'S IT. JOHNNY,
JOHNNY, PLEASE.
108
00:06:00,893 --> 00:06:03,572
LITTLE ARTHUR'S ONLY GONNA BE HERE
FOR, YOU KNOW, TWO OR THREE DAYS.
109
00:06:03,596 --> 00:06:05,530
WE'RE ALL GONNA
HAVE BIG, BIG FUN.
110
00:06:05,598 --> 00:06:09,301
SO THANKS FOR DROPPING
BY AND GOOD LUCK, OKAY?
111
00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:11,736
WHEW!
112
00:06:11,805 --> 00:06:14,172
WHY DON'T YOU WAIT
OUTSIDE FOR A MINUTE?
113
00:06:14,241 --> 00:06:17,175
WHY? BECAUSE I'M
GONNA MAKE A PHONE CALL.
114
00:06:20,346 --> 00:06:22,980
JENNIFER'S OUT THERE.
115
00:06:28,621 --> 00:06:30,555
HI, HONEY. YEAH.
116
00:06:30,623 --> 00:06:33,491
LISTEN, OUR, UH...
OUR SON'S HOME.
117
00:06:33,560 --> 00:06:36,594
YEAH. HE'S... HE'S
BACK IN CINCINNATI.
118
00:06:36,663 --> 00:06:38,596
HELLO?
119
00:06:38,665 --> 00:06:41,266
HELLO?
120
00:06:47,573 --> 00:06:50,342
WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY THINGS?
121
00:06:50,410 --> 00:06:52,343
UH, NOTHING. NOTHING?
122
00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:54,390
NOW LISTEN TO ME,
YOU LITTLE MONSTER.
123
00:06:54,414 --> 00:06:56,881
HI, JENNIFER. HOW'S IT GOING?
ALL OF MY THINGS ARE ALL OVER!
124
00:06:56,950 --> 00:06:59,951
OH, GOOD LORD! WHO IS HE?
CARLSON'S KID. LET'S KILL HIM.
125
00:07:01,889 --> 00:07:04,455
- HI. HOW'S IT GOING?
- UH, NOT TOO WELL.
126
00:07:04,524 --> 00:07:06,857
JENNIFER, PLEASE!
127
00:07:11,665 --> 00:07:13,765
I'M SORRY.
128
00:07:13,833 --> 00:07:16,534
I, UH, SEE YOU'VE
MET LITTLE ARTHUR.
129
00:07:16,603 --> 00:07:19,043
YEAH, HE'S, UH,
SOMEWHAT OF A, UH... A NAZI.
130
00:07:19,072 --> 00:07:23,741
YEAH, UH... WELL,
HE'S YOUNG YET.
131
00:07:23,810 --> 00:07:26,177
MR. CARLSON,
132
00:07:26,246 --> 00:07:29,947
IS THIS CHILD GOING TO
REMAIN IN THIS OFFICE?
133
00:07:30,016 --> 00:07:33,418
WELL, PROBABLY FOR THE
NEXT TWO OR THREE DAYS.
134
00:07:33,486 --> 00:07:37,455
THEN HE HAD BETTER LEARN TO
BEHAVE HIMSELF. OH? WHAT DID HE DO?
135
00:07:37,524 --> 00:07:39,844
UH, HE GOT INTO
JENNIFER'S DRAWERS.
136
00:07:46,900 --> 00:07:49,167
WHOA, SON.
137
00:07:50,403 --> 00:07:53,571
HE DUMPED OUT ALL MY
PENCILS. LOOK AT MY STATIONERY.
138
00:07:53,640 --> 00:07:55,940
THIS PLACE IS JUST A MESS.
AND I'M SORRY, JENNIFER.
139
00:07:56,008 --> 00:07:58,109
UH, LOOK, SON, THAT IS A NO-NO.
140
00:07:58,178 --> 00:08:00,356
- GOOD MORNING, EVERYBODY.
- OH, HI, ANDY.
141
00:08:00,380 --> 00:08:03,781
UH, SAY, I'D LIKE FOR YOU TO MEET
MY SON, ANDY. THIS IS LITTLE ARTHUR.
142
00:08:05,385 --> 00:08:08,620
YOU'RE KIDDING.
WELL, HOW ARE YOU?
143
00:08:08,689 --> 00:08:11,022
ARTHUR, I'D, UH, LIKE FOR
YOU TO MEET ANDY TRAVIS.
144
00:08:11,091 --> 00:08:13,058
ANOTHER DEEJAY? OH, NO.
145
00:08:13,126 --> 00:08:15,060
ANDY'S OUR PROGRAM
DIRECTOR HERE.
146
00:08:15,128 --> 00:08:17,528
HE'S, UH, YOU KNOW, IN CHARGE
OF THINGS AROUND THE STATION.
147
00:08:17,597 --> 00:08:19,698
IT'S KIND OF LIKE, UH,
WELL, I'M THE PRESIDENT,
148
00:08:19,766 --> 00:08:22,366
AND HE'S MY FIVE-STAR
GENERAL. HOW DO YOU DO, SIR?
149
00:08:22,435 --> 00:08:25,503
WELL, I DO FINE. I DO JUST FINE.
150
00:08:25,572 --> 00:08:30,675
ANDY, UH, LITTLE ARTHUR'S GONNA BE
WORKING AROUND HERE FOR A LITTLE WHILE,
151
00:08:30,743 --> 00:08:34,345
SO FIND HIM A VITAL YET, UH,
OTHERWISE MEANINGLESS JOB.
152
00:08:35,681 --> 00:08:37,826
I'LL SHOW YOU AROUND
THE FORT. THANK YOU, SIR.
153
00:08:37,850 --> 00:08:40,585
- NICE BOY.
- YEAH?
154
00:08:40,654 --> 00:08:42,988
ANDY, UM,
155
00:08:43,056 --> 00:08:48,093
- THIS, UH, CHILD IS,
UM, UNUSUAL.
- OH, YEAH?
156
00:08:48,161 --> 00:08:50,695
YOU KNOW YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL
WHEN YOU'RE ANGRY?
157
00:08:53,333 --> 00:08:57,035
YEAH, HE DOES SEEM KINDA MATURE
FOR HIS AGE, DOESN'T HE? YEAH.
158
00:08:57,104 --> 00:08:59,770
ALL RIGHT. COME
ON, LOVER. LET'S GO.
159
00:08:59,839 --> 00:09:02,340
I'M NOT A LOVER, SIR. I'M
A LIEUTENANT COLONEL.
160
00:09:02,409 --> 00:09:04,342
HOW OLD IS THIS MAN?
161
00:09:04,411 --> 00:09:06,478
FORTY-NINE. YEAH, RIGHT.
162
00:09:06,546 --> 00:09:09,413
♪♪
163
00:09:09,482 --> 00:09:11,416
♪♪
164
00:09:24,164 --> 00:09:26,164
♪♪
165
00:09:35,308 --> 00:09:37,375
JOHNNY!
166
00:09:38,946 --> 00:09:41,346
♪♪ GET THAT KID OUT OF HERE.
167
00:09:41,415 --> 00:09:44,282
WHAT? COME ON.
THIS IS CARLSON'S SON.
168
00:09:44,350 --> 00:09:47,218
YEAH, I... I KNOW. WE MET.
UH, WE DON'T GET ALONG.
169
00:09:47,286 --> 00:09:49,265
LOOK, I'M SORRY
IF I MADE YOU MAD.
170
00:09:49,289 --> 00:09:51,222
YEAH?
171
00:09:51,291 --> 00:09:53,269
HOW DOES ALL THIS
STUFF WORK? I DON'T KNOW.
172
00:09:53,293 --> 00:09:55,371
HEY, COME ON, JOHNNY.
EXPLAIN IT TO HIM.
173
00:09:55,395 --> 00:09:57,495
UH, WELL, IT'S REALLY
KINDA SIMPLE, SEE.
174
00:09:57,563 --> 00:09:59,597
UM, I SPEAK INTO THIS,
175
00:09:59,666 --> 00:10:04,535
AND MY VOICE IS INSTANTANEOUSLY
TRANSMITTED OUT INTO THE CINCINNATI AREA...
176
00:10:04,604 --> 00:10:07,405
WHERE IT'S HEARD BY WELL
OVER A HUNDRED PEOPLE.
177
00:10:08,775 --> 00:10:12,644
MOST OF 'EM ARE INVALIDS THOUGH.
THEY CAN'T CHANGE THE DIAL.
178
00:10:12,712 --> 00:10:15,091
IS THAT RIGHT?
NO, IT'S NOT RIGHT.
179
00:10:15,115 --> 00:10:17,994
THERE ARE SEVERAL THOUSAND
PEOPLE LISTENING RIGHT NOW. REALLY?
180
00:10:18,018 --> 00:10:20,185
REALLY? THAT'S RIGHT.
181
00:10:20,253 --> 00:10:22,465
YOU'RE INTERESTED
IN RADIO? WELL, KINDA.
182
00:10:22,489 --> 00:10:24,457
IT'S PROBABLY BECAUSE
HE KNOWS THE FIRST THING
183
00:10:24,481 --> 00:10:26,257
YOU DO WHEN YOU
OVERTHROW A GOVERNMENT...
184
00:10:26,326 --> 00:10:29,094
IS SEIZE CONTROL OF
THE RADIO STATIONS.
185
00:10:30,097 --> 00:10:32,096
AND THEN YOU SHOOT
ALL THE DEEJAYS.
186
00:10:33,566 --> 00:10:36,779
HEY, MEN. WHAT
IT IS? HEY, VENUS.
187
00:10:36,803 --> 00:10:41,873
I WOULD LIKE TO TAKE THE OPPORTUNITY TO
INTRODUCE YOU TO ARTHUR CARLSON JUNIOR.
188
00:10:41,942 --> 00:10:43,942
THE OMEN.
189
00:10:47,013 --> 00:10:49,124
I DIDN'T KNOW CARLSON HAD A SON.
190
00:10:49,148 --> 00:10:52,508
WHERE'S THE REST OF THE BAND?
191
00:10:52,552 --> 00:10:55,053
YOU'RE BLACK!
192
00:10:57,790 --> 00:11:02,360
I AM? OH, MY GOSH! I'M BLACK!
193
00:11:02,428 --> 00:11:06,230
WE DIDN'T HAVE ANY BLACKS IN
PRUSSIAN VALLEY. COME ON, ANDY.
194
00:11:07,534 --> 00:11:09,534
I'M HIP.
195
00:11:09,602 --> 00:11:13,270
AIN'T NO BLACKS DUMB ENOUGH TO GO
TO A PLACE CALLED PRUSSIAN VALLEY.
196
00:11:14,507 --> 00:11:17,374
HEY, MAN. HOW COME YOU
DIDN'T TELL ME I WAS BLACK?
197
00:11:21,147 --> 00:11:23,581
YEAH. HELLO, JENNIFER.
198
00:11:23,650 --> 00:11:27,351
THE COMMANDANT?
YEAH, PUT HIM ON.
199
00:11:27,420 --> 00:11:30,287
HELLO, GENERAL?
200
00:11:30,356 --> 00:11:32,289
UH-HUH.
201
00:11:32,358 --> 00:11:34,358
UH-HUH.
202
00:11:35,695 --> 00:11:39,196
OH, GEE. I... WELL, I-I'M
SORRY TO HEAR THAT.
203
00:11:41,067 --> 00:11:43,000
OH, I SEE.
204
00:11:44,003 --> 00:11:45,937
WELL, GOSH.
205
00:11:46,005 --> 00:11:50,140
LOOK, I'M ABSOLUTELY POSITIVE THAT,
YOU KNOW, YOU'LL BE A GENERAL ONE DAY.
206
00:11:51,811 --> 00:11:54,479
UH, ANYWAY, UH, COLONEL,
IS THIS ABOUT MY...
207
00:11:54,547 --> 00:11:57,882
UH-HUH. UH-HUH.
208
00:11:57,951 --> 00:12:01,418
YEAH, WELL, WHAT DO THEY KNOW?
209
00:12:01,488 --> 00:12:04,388
UH, LISTEN, UH, COLONEL,
IS THIS ABOUT MY... MY SON?
210
00:12:21,040 --> 00:12:24,108
SO, YOU'RE THE BIG GUY'S KID.
211
00:12:24,177 --> 00:12:26,110
LITTLE BIG GUY.
212
00:12:27,513 --> 00:12:30,114
WELL, ON BEHALF OF,
UH, LES NESSMAN AND I,
213
00:12:30,182 --> 00:12:32,161
WELCOME TO WKRP IN CINCINNATI.
214
00:12:32,185 --> 00:12:35,652
- LES NESSMAN AND ME.
- WHAT?
215
00:12:35,721 --> 00:12:38,589
- LES NESSMAN AND ME.
- I KNEW IT.
216
00:12:40,093 --> 00:12:42,025
ALREADY BUTTERING
UP LITTLE BIG GUY, HUH?
217
00:12:42,095 --> 00:12:44,073
I SHOULD HAVE
KNOWN. I JUST MET HIM.
218
00:12:44,097 --> 00:12:47,064
OH, SURE. LOOK, KID, UH... LITTLE
BIG KID, DON'T LISTEN TO HIM.
219
00:12:47,133 --> 00:12:50,735
HE JUST DOES THE NEWS
AROUND HERE. I HANDLE THE SALES.
220
00:12:50,803 --> 00:12:53,203
I MEAN, WITHOUT ME, THIS
STATION WOULD BE NOWHERE.
221
00:12:53,272 --> 00:12:56,907
SO, UH, TELL YOUR DAD YOU HEARD
THAT AND YOU THINK IT'S RIGHT.
222
00:12:58,243 --> 00:13:00,211
MY GRANDMOTHER TALKS ABOUT YOU.
223
00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:03,781
HERB TARLEK? UH-HUH.
224
00:13:03,849 --> 00:13:05,783
MAMA TALKS ABOUT ME.
225
00:13:05,851 --> 00:13:08,152
- TELL ME, WHAT DOES SHE SAY?
- AW, NOTHIN'.
226
00:13:08,221 --> 00:13:11,823
LOOK, YOU LITTLE BA... BIG GUY.
227
00:13:11,891 --> 00:13:14,302
COME ON NOW. TELL UNCLE
HERBERT ALL ABOUT IT.
228
00:13:14,326 --> 00:13:16,794
SHE DOESN'T SAY ANYTHING.
229
00:13:18,564 --> 00:13:20,998
LOOK, UH, TELL YOU WHAT.
230
00:13:21,066 --> 00:13:23,401
- I'LL GIVE YOU...
- THE FIVE.
231
00:13:27,073 --> 00:13:30,575
THE FIVE... IF YOU TELL
ME WHAT SHE SAYS.
232
00:13:33,980 --> 00:13:36,046
SHE SAYS YOU'RE ADDLE-MINDED.
233
00:13:38,251 --> 00:13:40,184
ADDLE-MINDED?
234
00:13:40,253 --> 00:13:42,220
ADDLE-MINDED.
235
00:13:44,224 --> 00:13:46,957
LES, LOOK UP ADDLE-MINDED.
THIS COULD BE GOOD FOR ME.
236
00:13:47,960 --> 00:13:49,893
CORPORAL?
237
00:13:49,963 --> 00:13:52,563
WELL, I THOUGHT HE LEFT
SCHOOL UP THERE BEC...
238
00:13:54,500 --> 00:13:56,500
OH.
239
00:13:59,872 --> 00:14:02,473
HE'S FLUNKING OUT?
240
00:14:02,541 --> 00:14:05,861
EXCUSE ME, LITTLE BIG GUY, BUT DOES
YOUR GRANDMOTHER EVER SPEAK ABOUT ME?
241
00:14:05,912 --> 00:14:08,645
NO.
242
00:14:08,714 --> 00:14:11,481
WELL, I'M SURE THERE MUST BE
TIMES... AROUND THE DINNER TABLE, SAY...
243
00:14:11,550 --> 00:14:13,984
WHEN MY NAME JUST COMES UP.
244
00:14:14,053 --> 00:14:17,154
AFTER A DAY OF MY NEWS
REPORTS AT 9:00, 12:00, 2:00...
245
00:14:17,223 --> 00:14:20,023
AND 4:00 AND 6:00 ON FRIDAYS?
246
00:14:20,092 --> 00:14:22,025
I'M LES NESSMAN.
247
00:14:23,396 --> 00:14:27,465
LES NESSMAN, FIVE-TIME WINNER
OF THE BUCKEYE NEWSHAWK AWARD.
248
00:14:27,533 --> 00:14:30,234
DOES THAT RING A BELL? NOPE.
249
00:14:37,309 --> 00:14:40,678
SHE SAYS THAT YOU'RE OBTUSE.
250
00:14:40,746 --> 00:14:42,746
OOH.
251
00:14:44,183 --> 00:14:47,017
"ADULTERY, ADMIRE"...
252
00:14:47,086 --> 00:14:50,221
LET ME SEE THAT. OBTUSE.
253
00:14:53,926 --> 00:14:56,794
ADDLE-MINDED.
254
00:14:56,863 --> 00:14:59,697
OBTUSE!
255
00:14:59,765 --> 00:15:03,934
ADDLE... HI, GUYS.
256
00:15:04,003 --> 00:15:06,269
OH, HI, BAILEY. MET
CARLSON'S SON?
257
00:15:06,338 --> 00:15:09,005
UH, YES. I'VE HAD THE PLEASURE.
258
00:15:09,074 --> 00:15:12,576
WELL, HE'S QUITE A KID, LET ME
TELL YOU. TELL YOUR DAD I SAID THAT.
259
00:15:12,644 --> 00:15:15,279
OBTUSE.
260
00:15:15,348 --> 00:15:17,481
ACCORDING TO WEBSTER'S...
261
00:15:17,550 --> 00:15:20,184
"EXCEEDING 90 DEGREES,
262
00:15:20,253 --> 00:15:23,020
"BUT LESS THAT 180 DEGREES.
263
00:15:24,590 --> 00:15:28,859
"LACKING SHARPNESS OR
QUICKNESS OF SENSIBILITY.
264
00:15:31,931 --> 00:15:35,733
"ROUNDED AT THE FREE END.
265
00:15:37,503 --> 00:15:39,503
DULL."
266
00:15:41,874 --> 00:15:44,141
- THAT'S AN INSULT.
- UH, LES, TAKE IT EASY.
267
00:15:44,210 --> 00:15:46,510
TAKE IT EASY? JUST
CALM DOWN, OKAY?
268
00:15:46,579 --> 00:15:48,724
DON'T TELL ME TO CALM
DOWN. I JUST PAID FIVE
269
00:15:48,748 --> 00:15:51,115
DOLLARS TO FIND OUT I'M
ROUNDED AT THE FREE END.
270
00:15:51,184 --> 00:15:54,818
COOL OFF, LES. HE'S JUST MAD
'CAUSE HE'S NOT ADDLE-MINDED.
271
00:15:54,887 --> 00:15:56,598
I AM TOO. NO, YOU'RE NOT.
272
00:15:56,622 --> 00:15:58,167
YES, I AM. YOU ARE NOT.
273
00:15:58,191 --> 00:15:59,734
YES, I AM! YOU ARE NOT!
274
00:15:59,758 --> 00:16:02,459
YOU GUYS! YOU ARE
BOTH ADDLE-MINDED.
275
00:16:02,528 --> 00:16:04,895
THANK YOU, BAILEY.
YOU'RE WELCOME, LES.
276
00:16:07,700 --> 00:16:09,966
♪♪
277
00:16:10,035 --> 00:16:12,736
HI, KID. DON'T CALL ME KID.
278
00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:16,840
OKAY, GENERAL. YOU WANNA HOP UP
FROM THERE SO I CAN USE THE PHONE?
279
00:16:16,909 --> 00:16:18,842
SORRY. THIS IS MY DESK NOW.
280
00:16:18,911 --> 00:16:22,746
WHY DON'T YOU JUST STAND UP FOR A SECOND
SO OLD VENUS CAN USE THE PHONE THERE?
281
00:16:22,815 --> 00:16:25,082
SORRY.
282
00:16:26,318 --> 00:16:28,418
STAND UP, BOY.
283
00:16:28,488 --> 00:16:30,988
I DON'T FEEL LIKE IT, BOY.
284
00:16:37,563 --> 00:16:40,174
NOT GOOD, VENUS. THIS
IS NOT WHAT WE WANNA DO.
285
00:16:40,198 --> 00:16:41,631
LOOK, HE'S JUST A LITTLE GUY.
286
00:16:41,700 --> 00:16:44,420
AND BESIDES, IT'S
THE BIG GUY'S KID.
287
00:16:44,871 --> 00:16:46,871
I SEE.
288
00:16:48,807 --> 00:16:50,741
WELL, THANK YOU. YEAH.
289
00:16:50,809 --> 00:16:53,177
YEAH, THA-THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
290
00:17:01,286 --> 00:17:04,988
ANDY, LOOK, I'M SORRY, MAN. I GUESS
I JUST LOST MY HEAD FOR A SECOND.
291
00:17:05,057 --> 00:17:07,135
THAT'S ALL RIGHT. ANDY,
YOU'VE GOT TO DO SOMETHING.
292
00:17:07,159 --> 00:17:10,427
LOOK, THE BOY HAS BEEN HERE
LESS THAN AN HOUR. SEEMS LONGER.
293
00:17:10,496 --> 00:17:13,163
UH, MR. CARLSON, THERE SEEMS
TO BE A SLIGHT PROBLEM OVER HERE.
294
00:17:13,232 --> 00:17:15,532
I'M NOT SURPRISED. LITTLE
ARTHUR, COME WITH ME.
295
00:17:15,601 --> 00:17:18,134
UH, DAD, THIS GUY HERE
JUST TRIED TO KILL ME.
296
00:17:18,203 --> 00:17:20,137
COME WITH ME.
297
00:17:20,206 --> 00:17:22,139
WELL, HE'S GONNA PAY FOR IT.
298
00:17:22,208 --> 00:17:25,142
MY GRANDMOTHER'S
GONNA FIRE YOU. ARTHUR!
299
00:17:25,211 --> 00:17:27,578
YES, SIR? FOLLOW ME!
300
00:17:27,646 --> 00:17:31,115
YEAH, BUT HE JUST TRIED TO
KILL ME. HE LIFTED ME UP AND...
301
00:17:33,219 --> 00:17:35,385
LITTLE BRAT. ALL RIGHT,
LOOK. WHAT HAPPENED?
302
00:17:35,454 --> 00:17:37,688
START... START AT THE BEGINNING.
303
00:17:37,757 --> 00:17:41,592
WELL, FIRST OF ALL, HE'S NOT SUPPOSED
TO BE PICKING ON LITTLE WHITE KIDS.
304
00:17:41,660 --> 00:17:44,628
HOW ABOUT BIG WHITE
KIDS, MAN? HEY, NO!
305
00:17:47,133 --> 00:17:49,366
ALL RIGHT. SIT.
306
00:17:49,435 --> 00:17:51,936
NOT THERE.
307
00:17:52,004 --> 00:17:54,638
HERE.
308
00:17:54,707 --> 00:17:58,508
ALL RIGHT, SON. NOW YOU AND I ARE
GONNA GET A COUPLE OF THINGS STRAIGHT.
309
00:18:00,146 --> 00:18:02,346
I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU
SAID TO VENUS FLYTRAP,
310
00:18:02,415 --> 00:18:04,949
BUT YOU DON'T SPEAK TO HIM OR
ANYBODY ELSE LIKE THAT EVER AGAIN!
311
00:18:05,017 --> 00:18:05,624
WELL, DAD...
312
00:18:05,648 --> 00:18:08,218
AND YOU KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF
OF OTHER PEOPLE'S PROPERTY,
313
00:18:08,287 --> 00:18:10,265
- THINGS THAT DON'T
BELONG TO YOU!
- WELL, DAD...
314
00:18:10,289 --> 00:18:12,389
I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S
GOTTEN INTO YOU, ARTHUR!
315
00:18:15,962 --> 00:18:18,696
UNLESS YOU'RE JUST
DYING FOR ATTENTION.
316
00:18:19,999 --> 00:18:22,433
ARE YOU MAD?
317
00:18:22,501 --> 00:18:25,235
YOU BET I'M MAD.
318
00:18:25,304 --> 00:18:29,807
I'M MAD AT YOU,
AND I'M MAD AT ME.
319
00:18:29,875 --> 00:18:32,876
IS... IS THIS SOME
KIND OF A TRICK?
320
00:18:32,945 --> 00:18:35,412
NO, SON.
321
00:18:35,481 --> 00:18:37,815
THE TRICKS ARE ALL OVER.
322
00:18:39,318 --> 00:18:42,820
WHEN YOU WERE A SIX-YEAR-OLD
CHILD, YOU WERE A RAMBUNCTIOUS KID.
323
00:18:42,888 --> 00:18:46,357
MAYBE MORE RAMBUNCTIOUS THAN
OTHER KIDS YOUR AGE. I DON'T KNOW.
324
00:18:47,360 --> 00:18:50,728
BUT, GOD HELP ME,
325
00:18:50,796 --> 00:18:54,832
YOUR MOTHER AND I, WE LET YOUR GRANDMOTHER
TALK US INTO SENDING YOU AWAY TO SCHOOL.
326
00:18:57,269 --> 00:18:59,903
WELL, YOU CAN'T
BLAME YOUR GRANDMA.
327
00:18:59,972 --> 00:19:03,607
YOU SEE, HER FATHER WENT TO A MILITARY
ACADEMY, A MAN WHOM SHE MUCH ADMIRED.
328
00:19:03,676 --> 00:19:07,444
SHE THOUGHT SHE WAS
DOING THE RIGHT THING.
329
00:19:07,513 --> 00:19:11,648
EVEN THOUGH I HAD DIFFERENT
THOUGHTS ON THE MATTER AT THAT TIME, I...
330
00:19:13,919 --> 00:19:16,854
WELL, SON, AWAY YOU WENT.
331
00:19:19,624 --> 00:19:22,492
FOUR FEET TALL,
332
00:19:22,561 --> 00:19:25,729
DRESSED LIKE GENERAL MacARTHUR,
333
00:19:25,798 --> 00:19:30,434
WAVING AT YOUR MOTHER AND ME
FROM THAT RAILROAD CAR WINDOW.
334
00:19:30,502 --> 00:19:32,502
OH, SON, I'M SORRY.
335
00:19:33,573 --> 00:19:36,807
DAD, I LIKE IT AT
PRUSSIAN VALLEY.
336
00:19:36,876 --> 00:19:39,776
BUT, SEE, I HAVE TO BE
REGIMENTAL COMMANDER.
337
00:19:39,845 --> 00:19:41,845
STOP IT, SON.
338
00:19:41,914 --> 00:19:46,550
YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE
REGIMENTAL COMMANDER.
339
00:19:46,619 --> 00:19:50,020
ALL YOU HAVE TO BE
IS AN 11-YEAR-OLD BOY.
340
00:19:50,089 --> 00:19:53,657
WELL, YOU KNOW, I WAS VERY
SUCCESSFUL AT THE ACADEMY.
341
00:19:54,727 --> 00:19:57,894
OH, I BET YOU WERE.
342
00:19:57,963 --> 00:19:59,963
DID THEY CALL YOU?
343
00:20:02,101 --> 00:20:04,034
NO.
344
00:20:04,103 --> 00:20:06,804
NO, I-I-I DON'T THINK I'M
GONNA CALL THEM EITHER.
345
00:20:06,872 --> 00:20:10,373
YOU SEE, WHAT I... WHAT
I THOUGHT WAS, UH...
346
00:20:10,442 --> 00:20:13,243
WELL, I THOUGHT...
347
00:20:13,312 --> 00:20:16,124
MAYBE YOU COULD GO TO PUBLIC
SCHOOL RIGHT HERE IN CINCINNATI.
348
00:20:16,148 --> 00:20:20,117
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THAT? I'LL
HAVE TO THINK SOMETHING LIKE THAT OVER.
349
00:20:20,185 --> 00:20:23,987
MEMORIAL JUNIOR HIGH SCHOOL
IS JUST DOWN THE STREET FROM US.
350
00:20:24,056 --> 00:20:26,623
WELL... GOT GIRLS.
351
00:20:26,692 --> 00:20:29,693
♪♪
352
00:20:31,430 --> 00:20:33,430
OKAY.
353
00:20:34,667 --> 00:20:36,600
OH, SON.
354
00:20:37,603 --> 00:20:40,571
IT'S A GOOD CAREER DECISION.
355
00:20:40,640 --> 00:20:42,839
ONLY THOSE MEDALS SURE HURT.
356
00:20:42,908 --> 00:20:44,841
OH. DAD, ABOUT THOSE MEDALS.
357
00:20:44,910 --> 00:20:46,888
SON, FOR-FORGET
ABOUT THE MEDALS.
358
00:20:46,912 --> 00:20:50,147
LOOK, YOU'RE A CIVILIAN NOW,
HUH? YOU GOTTA ACT LIKE ONE.
359
00:20:50,216 --> 00:20:54,451
I'M NOT SURE I KNOW HOW. AW, LISTEN,
YOU'LL GET THE HANG OF IT IN NOTHIN' FLAT.
360
00:20:54,520 --> 00:20:59,122
UH... SON, UH, AS YOU KNOW,
361
00:20:59,192 --> 00:21:02,426
I'M AN EXTREMELY BUSY MAN,
362
00:21:02,495 --> 00:21:05,762
BUT, UH, YOU KNOW, ALONG
WITH THE BURDENS OF AUTHORITY...
363
00:21:05,831 --> 00:21:08,899
COME MOMENTS OF, UH, RECREATION.
364
00:21:08,967 --> 00:21:10,967
WAIT HERE A MINUTE.
365
00:21:13,406 --> 00:21:15,339
THE COAST IS CLEAR.
366
00:21:17,042 --> 00:21:19,488
WHAT DO YOU THINK
OF THAT SUCKER? WOW!
367
00:21:19,512 --> 00:21:21,022
AIN'T IT A BEAUTY? IS IT YOURS?
368
00:21:21,046 --> 00:21:23,447
HUH? YEAH. IT'S MINE, ALL RIGHT.
369
00:21:25,184 --> 00:21:28,018
THIS BABY'S COMPLETELY
REMOTE CONTROLLED TOO.
370
00:21:28,087 --> 00:21:30,087
YOU KNOW WHAT
MY TIME WITH THIS IS?
371
00:21:30,156 --> 00:21:33,001
SEVEN MINUTES, 32 SECONDS AROUND THE
ROOM WITHOUT HITTIN' A STICK OF FURNITURE.
372
00:21:33,025 --> 00:21:34,958
YOU WANNA TRY IT? SURE.
373
00:21:35,027 --> 00:21:37,394
JUST FLIP UP THAT ANTENNA
AND HAVE A GO AT IT.
374
00:21:37,463 --> 00:21:39,729
HEY, THAT'S PRETTY GOOD.
375
00:21:39,798 --> 00:21:41,776
YOU'RE GETTIN' THE
HANG OF THAT REAL QUICK.
376
00:21:41,800 --> 00:21:43,778
HEY, DO YOU LIKE ROCK AND ROLL?
377
00:21:43,802 --> 00:21:45,735
YEAH. OH, GOOD.
378
00:21:45,805 --> 00:21:49,540
♪♪
379
00:21:57,116 --> 00:21:59,349
BASKETBALL.
380
00:22:08,460 --> 00:22:13,329
♪♪
381
00:22:13,399 --> 00:22:17,267
OH, WELL. OLD HABITS DIE
HARD, DON'T THEY, SON?
382
00:22:17,335 --> 00:22:19,436
YOU READY? YOU
GOTTA CONCENTRATE.
383
00:22:19,505 --> 00:22:24,074
ON THREE. ONE, TWO, THREE.
384
00:22:25,111 --> 00:22:28,212
ALL RIGHT! WE DID IT! WE DID IT!
385
00:22:39,024 --> 00:22:41,658
THEY STILL IN THERE? UH-HUH.
386
00:22:41,726 --> 00:22:43,794
WHAT ARE THEY
DOIN'? I DON'T KNOW.
387
00:23:07,519 --> 00:23:11,054
HE DID IT! WITHOUT EVEN
LOOKING, HE DID IT! THAT'S MY DAD!
388
00:23:15,027 --> 00:23:17,027
HI THERE.
389
00:23:24,503 --> 00:23:26,469
♪♪
390
00:23:30,209 --> 00:23:33,810
♪♪
391
00:23:43,255 --> 00:23:45,154
♪♪
392
00:23:58,737 --> 00:24:00,737
♪♪
28130
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