Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:24,090 --> 00:00:25,158
- Good evening.
2
00:00:29,662 --> 00:00:33,199
I am attempting to assist
my brother, Alfred,
3
00:00:33,233 --> 00:00:36,503
in introducing this
evening's chilling shocker.
4
00:00:36,536 --> 00:00:39,939
It is called See the Monkey
Dance.
5
00:00:41,174 --> 00:00:44,611
There seems to be no
end to the humiliations
6
00:00:44,644 --> 00:00:48,415
which I suffer in the
name of art and profit.
7
00:00:48,448 --> 00:00:51,618
See the Monkey Dance, indeed.
8
00:00:51,651 --> 00:00:54,654
One of the disadvantages of show
business
9
00:00:54,688 --> 00:00:57,891
is that although it is sometimes
possible
10
00:00:57,924 --> 00:00:59,926
to put the actors on strings,
11
00:00:59,959 --> 00:01:04,330
the audience is considerably
more difficult to manage.
12
00:01:04,364 --> 00:01:08,368
We are experimenting with
a limited type of control,
13
00:01:08,401 --> 00:01:13,573
using a single string and
tying them to their seats.
14
00:01:13,606 --> 00:01:18,278
Tonight's play is indeed
entitled See the Monkey Dance.
15
00:01:18,311 --> 00:01:22,115
It is a story of a man who finds
himself
16
00:01:22,148 --> 00:01:24,551
involved in a mad charade
17
00:01:24,584 --> 00:01:28,154
which he neither
understands nor can escape.
18
00:01:28,188 --> 00:01:31,257
It begins in a few moments.
19
00:02:19,572 --> 00:02:21,675
- Langendolen.
20
00:02:23,810 --> 00:02:24,978
- I say, how long are we
stopping here?
21
00:02:25,078 --> 00:02:27,080
- Three or four
minutes, that's all, sir.
22
00:02:27,080 --> 00:02:28,081
- Thank you.
23
00:02:44,898 --> 00:02:46,399
- Linwood exchange.
24
00:02:46,433 --> 00:02:47,600
- Hello, miss?
25
00:02:47,634 --> 00:02:48,335
- Number please.
26
00:02:48,368 --> 00:02:52,605
- I'd like Glynmon 239, please.
27
00:02:52,639 --> 00:02:53,273
- 239?
28
00:02:53,306 --> 00:02:54,007
- Yes, and hurry, thank you.
29
00:03:04,584 --> 00:03:05,685
- Hello?
30
00:03:05,719 --> 00:03:07,320
- Hello?
31
00:03:07,354 --> 00:03:08,421
Is that you?
32
00:03:08,455 --> 00:03:09,589
- Yes, baby.
33
00:03:09,622 --> 00:03:11,057
- Aw.
34
00:03:11,057 --> 00:03:12,325
Are you alone?
35
00:03:13,793 --> 00:03:15,662
- Yes, baby.
36
00:03:15,695 --> 00:03:16,563
I'm all alone.
37
00:03:16,596 --> 00:03:18,064
You can say what you want to.
38
00:03:19,065 --> 00:03:22,769
The other won't be back until
Monday.
39
00:03:22,802 --> 00:03:27,741
Two, count 'em, two whole lovely
days.
40
00:03:27,774 --> 00:03:29,576
- Easy, now, dear.
41
00:03:29,609 --> 00:03:31,277
Not on the phone.
42
00:03:31,311 --> 00:03:33,947
Switchboards are just
another way of advertising.
43
00:03:33,980 --> 00:03:39,085
I will be at the usual
place in about half an hour?
44
00:03:40,387 --> 00:03:44,758
- Darling sits here all by
herself in this great, big house
45
00:03:44,791 --> 00:03:47,794
with no one to even hold her
tiny hand.
46
00:03:47,827 --> 00:03:50,397
- Dear, not on the phone!
47
00:03:52,132 --> 00:03:54,367
You'll save it till later on?
48
00:03:54,401 --> 00:03:55,702
There's a girl.
49
00:03:55,735 --> 00:03:57,704
- In an hour, baby.
50
00:03:57,737 --> 00:03:59,172
- One hour, my love.
51
00:04:00,540 --> 00:04:00,907
One hour.
52
00:04:09,516 --> 00:04:09,883
- Oh, yes.
53
00:04:09,916 --> 00:04:11,051
Yes, indeed.
54
00:04:14,888 --> 00:04:16,723
Two whole days.
55
00:04:16,756 --> 00:04:21,728
Count them, two.
56
00:04:26,766 --> 00:04:28,068
Good evening.
57
00:04:39,779 --> 00:04:41,114
- How typical.
58
00:04:45,085 --> 00:04:47,387
So you're going to read, are
you?
59
00:04:49,089 --> 00:04:50,523
- I beg your pardon?
60
00:04:50,557 --> 00:04:52,592
- I beg your pardon.
61
00:04:52,625 --> 00:04:56,563
I said, as you well know, so
you're going to read, are you?
62
00:04:57,697 --> 00:04:59,799
- I was thinking of it, yes.
63
00:04:59,833 --> 00:05:00,400
- Typical, typical.
64
00:05:00,433 --> 00:05:01,668
Here it comes.
65
00:05:01,701 --> 00:05:02,869
- If you don't mind.
66
00:05:02,902 --> 00:05:04,371
- If you don't mind.
67
00:05:04,404 --> 00:05:05,271
Right on cue.
68
00:05:06,039 --> 00:05:07,540
No, I don't mind.
69
00:05:07,574 --> 00:05:09,042
It's probably all for the best.
70
00:05:12,512 --> 00:05:13,346
Typical.
71
00:05:14,948 --> 00:05:18,451
- What is so typical, if I may
ask?
72
00:05:18,485 --> 00:05:19,285
- Ask away.
73
00:05:20,920 --> 00:05:21,888
- Well?
74
00:05:21,921 --> 00:05:23,790
- Well what?
75
00:05:23,823 --> 00:05:24,424
You were going to ask me
something.
76
00:05:24,457 --> 00:05:26,559
You said if I may ask.
77
00:05:30,797 --> 00:05:33,433
You are typical.
78
00:05:33,466 --> 00:05:35,335
That's what is typical.
79
00:05:35,368 --> 00:05:38,838
- Now, just exactly how do
you know that I am typical?
80
00:05:38,872 --> 00:05:41,074
- Because everything you do
81
00:05:41,074 --> 00:05:43,610
is just what one would expect
you to do.
82
00:05:44,577 --> 00:05:47,881
- All right, then, I am typical.
83
00:05:47,914 --> 00:05:50,316
Now, that is just one
more little thing in life
84
00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:52,452
that we shall have to
put up with, isn't it?
85
00:05:52,485 --> 00:05:53,687
Now--
- Here it comes.
86
00:05:53,720 --> 00:05:54,387
- If you don't mind.
87
00:05:54,421 --> 00:05:56,756
- If you don't mind.
88
00:05:56,790 --> 00:06:00,093
It used to be frightfully upper
class, "if you don't mind."
89
00:06:01,194 --> 00:06:04,664
Aristocratic approbation, ever
so genteel.
90
00:06:04,698 --> 00:06:06,066
If you don't mind.
91
00:06:06,099 --> 00:06:07,901
But actually now, old boy,
it's become rather vulgar,
92
00:06:07,934 --> 00:06:08,702
and I'd rather you didn't use
it.
93
00:06:08,735 --> 00:06:11,071
If you don't mind.
94
00:06:11,104 --> 00:06:13,573
- Now look here, will you please
tell me
95
00:06:13,606 --> 00:06:14,841
if you have decided to annoy me
96
00:06:14,874 --> 00:06:16,142
until we reach the next station?
97
00:06:16,176 --> 00:06:19,512
Because if so, I shan't
try to read at all.
98
00:06:19,546 --> 00:06:20,413
- I'm not trying to annoy you.
99
00:06:20,447 --> 00:06:21,748
- Well, then, let me put it this
way.
100
00:06:21,781 --> 00:06:24,117
You have succeeded without
trying.
101
00:06:24,150 --> 00:06:26,052
- Well, I certainly didn't
think I was annoying you.
102
00:06:26,086 --> 00:06:27,354
- Well, you were.
103
00:06:28,955 --> 00:06:30,557
- But I'm not now, am I?
104
00:06:30,590 --> 00:06:33,793
- Would you like something
to read or are you too drunk?
105
00:06:33,827 --> 00:06:34,961
- I'm not drunk.
106
00:06:35,061 --> 00:06:36,062
- Then you should see a
psychologist.
107
00:06:37,130 --> 00:06:39,399
- And I have something to read,
thank you.
108
00:06:39,432 --> 00:06:40,767
- All right, then, why
don't you read it, then?
109
00:06:40,800 --> 00:06:42,068
- Very well.
110
00:06:44,738 --> 00:06:46,106
You don't have to take that
attitude.
111
00:06:49,142 --> 00:06:51,544
Of course, it's typical of your
kind
112
00:06:51,578 --> 00:06:53,513
to be rude to strangers.
113
00:06:56,116 --> 00:06:58,184
- Are you all right?
114
00:06:58,218 --> 00:06:59,119
- Yes.
115
00:06:59,152 --> 00:07:00,420
- Are you sure?
116
00:07:00,453 --> 00:07:01,287
- Yes.
117
00:07:03,556 --> 00:07:03,923
I'm sorry I annoyed you.
118
00:07:05,658 --> 00:07:07,060
I'm really not like that.
119
00:07:07,927 --> 00:07:09,529
Please forgive me.
120
00:07:09,562 --> 00:07:10,897
- Oh no, that's quite all right.
121
00:07:10,930 --> 00:07:13,266
- I work too hard, you see.
122
00:07:13,299 --> 00:07:15,669
- Oh, that's a common fault
these days.
123
00:07:15,702 --> 00:07:16,836
- It's when the pressure comes
off
124
00:07:16,870 --> 00:07:19,706
I have a tendency to
go boyishly hysterical.
125
00:07:19,739 --> 00:07:20,640
- I see.
126
00:07:20,674 --> 00:07:22,075
- I've been to the psychologist,
127
00:07:22,108 --> 00:07:24,744
and they say it's a
perfectly normal reaction
128
00:07:24,778 --> 00:07:26,279
to my sort of work.
129
00:07:26,312 --> 00:07:27,414
- I see.
130
00:07:27,447 --> 00:07:28,048
- I'm dreadfully
sorry.
131
00:07:30,517 --> 00:07:31,818
- That's quite all right.
132
00:07:31,851 --> 00:07:33,153
- I'm a physicist.
133
00:07:33,186 --> 00:07:34,421
- Oh, how interesting.
134
00:07:34,454 --> 00:07:36,056
- I'm afraid that's all the
Ministry
135
00:07:36,089 --> 00:07:37,891
will allow me to say about it.
136
00:07:37,924 --> 00:07:40,193
- I'm in the brokerage business
myself.
137
00:07:40,226 --> 00:07:40,894
The City.
138
00:07:40,927 --> 00:07:41,928
- Oh.
139
00:07:41,961 --> 00:07:43,229
- Nothing but high pressure.
140
00:07:43,263 --> 00:07:44,464
I tell you, I don't think I
could stick it
141
00:07:44,497 --> 00:07:45,832
myself these days if I
didn't have a little place
142
00:07:45,865 --> 00:07:48,101
in the country I could
go to near Llandrin.
143
00:07:50,704 --> 00:07:52,205
- Near Llandrin?
144
00:07:52,238 --> 00:07:53,073
- Yes.
145
00:07:54,140 --> 00:07:55,608
- That's a coincidence.
146
00:07:56,743 --> 00:07:58,778
I have a place myself near
Llandrin.
147
00:07:58,812 --> 00:08:00,647
- Really?
- Yes.
148
00:08:01,915 --> 00:08:04,250
Isn't it a charming little town?
149
00:08:04,284 --> 00:08:09,322
- Well, now, I said that I
had a place near Llandrin.
150
00:08:10,757 --> 00:08:12,025
Actually that does make it
sound rather grand, doesn't it?
151
00:08:14,127 --> 00:08:18,398
Really, you see, well, I have a
caravan.
152
00:08:18,431 --> 00:08:20,533
I have it parked on the edge of
a field
153
00:08:20,567 --> 00:08:20,934
on a hill over the town.
154
00:08:21,034 --> 00:08:23,203
- A caravan.
155
00:08:23,236 --> 00:08:23,903
- Yes.
156
00:08:23,937 --> 00:08:26,139
- You have a caravan?
157
00:08:26,172 --> 00:08:27,273
- Yes.
158
00:08:28,675 --> 00:08:29,709
- Isn't that a laugh!
159
00:08:31,745 --> 00:08:33,213
- I don't use it very often.
160
00:08:34,147 --> 00:08:35,782
I don't see what there is that's
so funny
161
00:08:35,815 --> 00:08:38,184
about having a caravan, however.
162
00:08:38,218 --> 00:08:40,253
- No, no, no, the fact is,
163
00:08:41,087 --> 00:08:43,189
I have a caravan too.
164
00:08:43,223 --> 00:08:44,057
- Oh.
165
00:08:44,958 --> 00:08:45,825
You do?
166
00:08:45,859 --> 00:08:47,460
- Yes.
167
00:08:47,494 --> 00:08:48,528
- Really?
168
00:08:48,561 --> 00:08:49,329
- Yes.
169
00:08:49,362 --> 00:08:50,797
But I think we were both
referring
170
00:08:50,830 --> 00:08:53,633
to them ever so vaguely as
171
00:08:54,567 --> 00:08:56,269
country houses, weren't we?
172
00:08:57,604 --> 00:09:00,774
- Well, one does always
put on a little side, eh?
173
00:09:00,807 --> 00:09:02,008
- Look here.
174
00:09:03,143 --> 00:09:05,879
My caravan's on the edge
of a farm over the town,
175
00:09:05,912 --> 00:09:06,880
just like yours.
176
00:09:06,913 --> 00:09:08,581
- Oh, really?
177
00:09:08,615 --> 00:09:09,482
- Yes.
178
00:09:09,516 --> 00:09:10,784
Strange we haven't met before.
179
00:09:10,817 --> 00:09:15,055
- I thought I knew the area very
well.
180
00:09:15,088 --> 00:09:16,690
I used to spend all my weekends
181
00:09:16,723 --> 00:09:18,591
walking all through the country.
182
00:09:18,625 --> 00:09:20,326
I mean, I still do.
183
00:09:20,360 --> 00:09:22,896
Unless I'm tied up.
184
00:09:22,929 --> 00:09:25,832
- Who owns the farm you are on?
185
00:09:25,865 --> 00:09:26,800
- Williams.
186
00:09:26,833 --> 00:09:28,134
Williams' dairy farm.
187
00:09:28,168 --> 00:09:29,703
- Oh?
188
00:09:29,736 --> 00:09:31,338
I'm on Williams' property too.
189
00:09:32,105 --> 00:09:32,872
- Williams', the dairy?
190
00:09:32,906 --> 00:09:35,275
- Yes, Williams', the dairy.
191
00:09:35,308 --> 00:09:37,677
Curious, isn't it, that we
hadn't seen one another.
192
00:09:37,711 --> 00:09:40,847
- Tell me, where are you parked,
exactly?
193
00:09:40,880 --> 00:09:43,650
- Well, it's rather difficult to
describe.
194
00:09:44,651 --> 00:09:45,485
- Look.
195
00:09:47,053 --> 00:09:49,055
I go out of the station.
196
00:09:49,055 --> 00:09:52,058
I walk straight through
the town, past the pub.
197
00:09:52,092 --> 00:09:55,228
There I cut through the
alleyway out of the town,
198
00:09:55,261 --> 00:09:58,965
and I take the footpath
past the brook, up the hill.
199
00:09:59,065 --> 00:10:01,534
- Yes, yes, I know exactly where
you mean.
200
00:10:01,568 --> 00:10:03,036
I go that way myself.
201
00:10:03,069 --> 00:10:06,673
- Then I go down the
road for about 150 feet.
202
00:10:06,706 --> 00:10:07,507
There's a gate.
203
00:10:08,441 --> 00:10:10,877
I am parked right inside that
gate
204
00:10:10,910 --> 00:10:12,145
in the corner of the field.
205
00:10:12,178 --> 00:10:15,582
- Tell me, when did
our sly friend Williams
206
00:10:15,615 --> 00:10:16,282
rent this caravan to you?
207
00:10:16,316 --> 00:10:18,885
- Oh, he didn't rent it to me.
208
00:10:18,918 --> 00:10:21,054
Oh, no, no, I lease the land
from him.
209
00:10:21,087 --> 00:10:22,589
The caravan is mine.
210
00:10:22,622 --> 00:10:23,523
I moved it there myself.
211
00:10:23,556 --> 00:10:25,592
I've had it there for years.
212
00:10:25,625 --> 00:10:26,693
- Most curious.
213
00:10:28,161 --> 00:10:31,464
- We simply can't be talking
about the same place.
214
00:10:31,498 --> 00:10:34,200
No, we can't, because when
Williams leased that land to me,
215
00:10:34,234 --> 00:10:36,102
he promised me that he would not
allow
216
00:10:36,136 --> 00:10:36,903
anyone else to park there.
217
00:10:36,936 --> 00:10:39,372
- He told me the same thing.
218
00:10:39,406 --> 00:10:42,142
And as far as I could see three
weeks ago,
219
00:10:42,175 --> 00:10:44,244
he hadn't broken his word.
220
00:10:44,277 --> 00:10:46,613
- I believe it's in my lease.
221
00:10:46,646 --> 00:10:47,480
I mean, he got...
222
00:10:51,951 --> 00:10:53,920
What did you say?
223
00:10:53,953 --> 00:10:57,824
- There was only one
caravan on Williams' farm,
224
00:10:57,857 --> 00:10:58,825
and that was mine.
225
00:10:58,858 --> 00:11:01,194
A green one.
226
00:11:01,227 --> 00:11:03,663
Parked in the position
you've just described.
227
00:11:08,535 --> 00:11:11,338
- You're having another one
of your spells, aren't you?
228
00:11:13,340 --> 00:11:16,309
- I believe we're going
to be late this evening.
229
00:11:16,343 --> 00:11:17,344
In the hundreds of times
I've taken this train,
230
00:11:17,377 --> 00:11:20,146
I don't think it's been on time
once.
231
00:11:20,180 --> 00:11:22,382
Is that your experience too?
232
00:11:22,415 --> 00:11:23,249
- Yes.
233
00:11:23,283 --> 00:11:23,950
No.
234
00:11:23,983 --> 00:11:25,385
The train is never on time.
235
00:11:27,387 --> 00:11:31,458
Oh, look, don't you think
we should talk about this?
236
00:11:31,491 --> 00:11:34,127
I mean, I don't see any
necessity for rudeness.
237
00:11:35,095 --> 00:11:36,096
There's just been a little
mistake.
238
00:11:36,096 --> 00:11:39,733
Now, look, we can't possibly
both of us
239
00:11:39,766 --> 00:11:41,868
own the same caravan, now, can
we?
240
00:11:41,901 --> 00:11:43,403
Actually, I think it's very
interesting.
241
00:11:43,436 --> 00:11:45,338
Oh, here, allow me.
242
00:11:45,372 --> 00:11:48,174
You know, I think it's
one of those things,
243
00:11:48,208 --> 00:11:49,509
once we have it straightened
out,
244
00:11:49,542 --> 00:11:51,011
it's going to make a
very, very funny story.
245
00:11:53,113 --> 00:11:55,115
I'm sure the whole thing is
explainable.
246
00:11:55,115 --> 00:11:56,416
- By my madness, you mean.
247
00:11:56,449 --> 00:11:57,317
- Oh, no.
248
00:11:57,350 --> 00:11:59,719
Oh, no, no, no, no, I didn't say
that.
249
00:11:59,753 --> 00:12:01,221
- But you think I'm mad, don't
you?
250
00:12:01,254 --> 00:12:02,555
- No!
251
00:12:02,589 --> 00:12:03,356
- So.
252
00:12:04,224 --> 00:12:05,792
You pretended to own my caravan
253
00:12:05,825 --> 00:12:07,427
just to torment me, didn't you?
254
00:12:07,460 --> 00:12:08,294
- No.
- Just to see
255
00:12:08,328 --> 00:12:09,295
the monkey dance!
256
00:12:09,329 --> 00:12:11,431
- There's just been a little
mistake.
257
00:12:11,464 --> 00:12:13,566
- I have made no mistake.
258
00:12:13,600 --> 00:12:16,336
I am going to my green caravan,
259
00:12:16,369 --> 00:12:19,072
the position of which you
described very accurately,
260
00:12:19,072 --> 00:12:21,174
and I'm going to spend the
weekend there,
261
00:12:21,207 --> 00:12:24,377
resting and taking walks
in the surrounding country.
262
00:12:24,411 --> 00:12:26,446
I hope I shan't be bothered by
anyone.
263
00:12:26,479 --> 00:12:28,948
'Cause these weekends away from
my work are very important.
264
00:12:28,982 --> 00:12:31,818
Not only to me but in
some small way, I believe,
265
00:12:31,851 --> 00:12:34,254
to the defense of this nation.
266
00:12:38,658 --> 00:12:39,492
- Well,
267
00:12:42,095 --> 00:12:45,231
I'm not going to argue about the
obvious.
268
00:12:50,804 --> 00:12:53,139
It's my caravan, and there is no
argument.
269
00:12:58,978 --> 00:13:01,781
How many beds are there in your
caravan?
270
00:13:08,588 --> 00:13:11,791
My caravan has one large bed.
271
00:13:11,825 --> 00:13:13,059
It's a permanent bed.
272
00:13:14,694 --> 00:13:20,200
The sink is stainless steel,
the tap is nickel plated,
273
00:13:20,233 --> 00:13:22,836
and it has an H on it instead of
a C,
274
00:13:22,869 --> 00:13:25,138
even though it is cold water.
275
00:13:25,171 --> 00:13:28,308
That's because the day I
went into the shop to get it,
276
00:13:29,642 --> 00:13:31,644
it was the only one they had.
277
00:13:33,813 --> 00:13:35,115
There are yellow curtains on the
window.
278
00:13:35,148 --> 00:13:36,282
I'm afraid they're not very well
made,
279
00:13:36,316 --> 00:13:37,817
because I put them up myself.
280
00:13:37,851 --> 00:13:40,487
- Liar, I put those curtains up!
281
00:13:40,520 --> 00:13:44,190
So you have been in my
caravan, you rotten sneak!
282
00:13:44,924 --> 00:13:47,227
But you know about the tap.
283
00:13:49,095 --> 00:13:51,297
How did you know about the tap?
284
00:13:51,331 --> 00:13:51,965
It was the last one in the shop
that day.
285
00:13:51,998 --> 00:13:54,100
You couldn't have known!
286
00:13:55,735 --> 00:13:58,271
How did you know that?
287
00:13:58,304 --> 00:13:59,139
- You're
288
00:14:00,507 --> 00:14:03,476
repeating my own words back to
me.
289
00:14:03,943 --> 00:14:05,712
You're crazy.
290
00:14:05,745 --> 00:14:07,914
You can't fool me.
291
00:14:07,947 --> 00:14:10,717
You're some kind of nut,
that's what you are.
292
00:14:10,750 --> 00:14:12,585
- You believe that if it
comforts you.
293
00:14:14,054 --> 00:14:14,921
- It's my caravan.
294
00:14:14,954 --> 00:14:18,391
We are talking about my caravan.
295
00:14:18,425 --> 00:14:19,125
- We'll see
who sleeps there tonight.
296
00:14:19,159 --> 00:14:21,561
- Say what you like.
- Now,
297
00:14:21,594 --> 00:14:23,697
if you don't mind.
298
00:14:23,730 --> 00:14:25,665
- Now, if you don't mind.
299
00:14:25,699 --> 00:14:27,067
If that isn't typical.
300
00:14:27,867 --> 00:14:29,936
- I beg your pardon?
301
00:14:29,969 --> 00:14:32,272
- I said if that isn't typical,
302
00:14:32,305 --> 00:14:34,741
typical of a grade-A nut,
I don't know what is.
303
00:14:35,875 --> 00:14:38,545
- If you continue to annoy me,
304
00:14:38,578 --> 00:14:40,413
I shall pull the emergency cord.
305
00:14:40,447 --> 00:14:41,281
- Annoy you!
306
00:14:42,649 --> 00:14:43,583
The key!
307
00:14:43,616 --> 00:14:45,085
Ah, now, I have the key.
308
00:14:45,118 --> 00:14:49,089
Now, tell me, would I have
the key to your caravan?
309
00:14:53,660 --> 00:14:54,961
- How did you get that key?
310
00:14:54,994 --> 00:14:56,229
- Thought you'd say that.
311
00:14:56,262 --> 00:14:57,731
Typical!
312
00:14:57,764 --> 00:14:59,232
- When you lit my cigarette,
313
00:14:59,265 --> 00:15:00,834
you picked my pocket, didn't
you?
314
00:15:00,867 --> 00:15:02,335
Give me that key!
- Ah!
315
00:15:02,369 --> 00:15:03,036
Ha ha.
316
00:15:03,036 --> 00:15:04,504
- You swine!
317
00:15:04,537 --> 00:15:05,038
- Ha ha.
- Here!
318
00:15:05,038 --> 00:15:06,773
- Ooh!
319
00:15:06,806 --> 00:15:08,375
- Take that!
320
00:15:08,408 --> 00:15:09,409
Ooh!
- Oh!
321
00:15:09,442 --> 00:15:10,110
- Oh!
322
00:15:10,143 --> 00:15:10,944
- Now, you forced me to do that.
323
00:15:11,044 --> 00:15:13,346
You did, it was self defense.
324
00:15:13,380 --> 00:15:14,581
There was nothing else I could
do.
325
00:15:14,614 --> 00:15:15,915
Now, I'm sorry if I hurt
you, but you forced me.
326
00:15:15,949 --> 00:15:18,251
- Give me back my key.
327
00:15:18,284 --> 00:15:20,053
- Oh, look here.
328
00:15:20,053 --> 00:15:20,920
Don't you think you have
carried this far enough?
329
00:15:20,954 --> 00:15:21,821
Now, if you give me any more
trouble,
330
00:15:21,855 --> 00:15:24,090
I am going to go to the police.
331
00:15:24,124 --> 00:15:26,793
- Yes, I'm sure they'd like
to hear how you assaulted me!
332
00:15:26,826 --> 00:15:28,928
- That was self defense, anyway.
333
00:15:28,962 --> 00:15:30,330
- We'll see.
334
00:15:30,363 --> 00:15:31,698
- Oh!
335
00:15:31,731 --> 00:15:33,733
- Llandrin!
336
00:15:33,767 --> 00:15:35,669
- I don't care what you say.
337
00:15:35,702 --> 00:15:36,903
I am going to my caravan.
338
00:15:36,936 --> 00:15:41,174
If there is any trouble,
I'm going to the police.
339
00:15:55,388 --> 00:15:56,222
Taxi!
340
00:16:40,834 --> 00:16:42,936
Oh, I beg your pardon.
341
00:16:42,969 --> 00:16:44,070
- Ahem.
342
00:17:22,942 --> 00:17:23,877
- Operator.
343
00:17:23,910 --> 00:17:25,111
- Miss?
- Yes?
344
00:17:25,145 --> 00:17:27,113
- I would like Glynmon 239,
please.
345
00:17:27,147 --> 00:17:30,316
And I'm in rather a hurry, thank
you.
346
00:19:38,945 --> 00:19:40,046
Go away and leave me alone!
347
00:19:47,787 --> 00:19:49,189
What are you doing?
348
00:19:53,927 --> 00:19:55,628
He's out of his mind.
349
00:20:00,800 --> 00:20:02,802
You.
350
00:20:02,836 --> 00:20:04,571
Clear off my land.
351
00:20:04,604 --> 00:20:06,339
This is my field and my caravan.
352
00:20:06,373 --> 00:20:08,975
And if you don't clear off,
I'm going to call the police.
353
00:20:21,187 --> 00:20:23,456
What are you digging that hole
for?
354
00:20:23,490 --> 00:20:27,193
- I'm digging this hole for you,
George.
355
00:20:27,227 --> 00:20:28,261
- For me?
356
00:20:28,294 --> 00:20:30,030
- I may dig another for your
girlfriend,
357
00:20:30,063 --> 00:20:32,932
but I haven't made up
my mind about that yet.
358
00:20:32,966 --> 00:20:34,901
- What girlfriend?
359
00:20:34,934 --> 00:20:36,002
- She'll be along in a little
while.
360
00:20:37,737 --> 00:20:39,072
Your girlfriend.
361
00:20:39,105 --> 00:20:40,940
- But I haven't got a
girlfriend.
362
00:20:40,974 --> 00:20:42,776
Are you stark raving mad?
363
00:20:44,577 --> 00:20:46,513
- Two whole lovely days.
364
00:20:48,815 --> 00:20:50,917
Two, count them.
365
00:20:50,950 --> 00:20:52,619
- All right, then, I do have a
girlfriend.
366
00:20:52,652 --> 00:20:53,853
What business is that of yours?
367
00:20:53,887 --> 00:20:55,522
Uh-oh.
368
00:20:56,956 --> 00:21:01,294
I suppose that I must
not bring my girlfriend
369
00:21:01,327 --> 00:21:04,698
into your caravan, is that it?
370
00:21:04,731 --> 00:21:07,167
- It isn't my caravan.
371
00:21:07,200 --> 00:21:08,468
I was just fooling you.
372
00:21:09,703 --> 00:21:10,870
I didn't know where it was.
373
00:21:10,904 --> 00:21:14,174
I wanted to make sure you'd lead
me to it.
374
00:21:16,843 --> 00:21:17,577
- Who are you?
375
00:21:17,610 --> 00:21:19,079
- Take a guess, George.
376
00:21:21,381 --> 00:21:22,182
- Her husband.
377
00:21:29,789 --> 00:21:31,391
What rotten luck.
378
00:21:51,778 --> 00:21:54,114
Now, look here, old man.
379
00:21:54,114 --> 00:21:56,516
I am not going to try and lie to
you.
380
00:21:56,549 --> 00:21:56,816
- That's good.
381
00:21:59,252 --> 00:22:00,086
- It was
382
00:22:02,088 --> 00:22:04,057
simply one of those things,
383
00:22:04,057 --> 00:22:06,359
and I'm awfully sorry
that it had to happen.
384
00:22:07,427 --> 00:22:10,063
- I'm going to kill you, George.
385
00:22:10,063 --> 00:22:13,900
Shortly after, when she
arrives, I may kill her as well,
386
00:22:13,933 --> 00:22:17,170
but I haven't made up
my mind about that yet.
387
00:22:26,880 --> 00:22:28,481
- Would you like a drink?
388
00:22:28,515 --> 00:22:28,782
- Later on.
389
00:22:30,417 --> 00:22:33,153
Actually, I'd rather you didn't
come any further than that.
390
00:22:33,186 --> 00:22:34,154
- Why?
391
00:22:34,187 --> 00:22:35,722
- Because you can run faster
than I can,
392
00:22:35,755 --> 00:22:39,626
and I don't want you to get
away as the last one did.
393
00:22:39,659 --> 00:22:40,894
- Now, see here.
394
00:22:41,928 --> 00:22:43,229
- There's a gun in this case.
395
00:22:43,263 --> 00:22:44,731
I'll use it if you step
out of that doorway.
396
00:22:48,168 --> 00:22:50,770
- Look, now, surely we
can talk about this.
397
00:22:52,672 --> 00:22:52,939
- Not really.
398
00:22:54,674 --> 00:22:57,444
The one thing we have in common,
399
00:22:57,477 --> 00:22:59,612
I mean our woman, George,
400
00:22:59,646 --> 00:23:02,115
is a joy to you and an agony to
me.
401
00:23:03,416 --> 00:23:06,619
What can joy possibly say
that agony will understand?
402
00:23:06,653 --> 00:23:09,122
- I didn't know you felt
that way about your wife.
403
00:23:09,155 --> 00:23:09,856
Really I didn't.
404
00:23:09,889 --> 00:23:12,125
- That's about all one can say.
405
00:23:14,961 --> 00:23:18,131
Of course, if we had
time to know one another,
406
00:23:18,164 --> 00:23:19,399
we might become friends.
407
00:23:20,734 --> 00:23:21,534
Not really good friends.
408
00:23:21,568 --> 00:23:23,636
I find you a bit pompous.
409
00:23:23,670 --> 00:23:26,806
Certainly the best of
acquaintances.
410
00:23:26,840 --> 00:23:28,908
- Oh, now, see here, I don't
think
411
00:23:28,942 --> 00:23:32,412
it's too late at all for
us to become friends.
412
00:23:32,445 --> 00:23:33,279
- Now, now, George.
413
00:23:33,313 --> 00:23:35,448
- No, no, no, it's true.
414
00:23:35,482 --> 00:23:37,684
Oh, I do have a pompous streak.
415
00:23:37,717 --> 00:23:38,985
It's my business.
416
00:23:39,085 --> 00:23:41,788
I am so glad that you mentioned
it.
417
00:23:41,821 --> 00:23:42,922
Most of my friends,
418
00:23:42,956 --> 00:23:43,823
they would never bring it to my
attention,
419
00:23:43,857 --> 00:23:45,792
and one should know these
things.
420
00:23:45,825 --> 00:23:50,597
One should have a friend who
will tell him these things.
421
00:23:50,630 --> 00:23:52,132
- I do wish you'd try to be
brave.
422
00:23:52,165 --> 00:23:54,300
Of course, I can understand your
anxiety,
423
00:23:54,334 --> 00:23:57,237
but she'll be along in a
minute and it'll all be over.
424
00:23:58,505 --> 00:23:59,439
You've had a good run for your
money.
425
00:23:59,472 --> 00:23:59,806
Now it's time to pay.
426
00:24:04,310 --> 00:24:05,512
Was she nice to you, by the way?
427
00:24:05,545 --> 00:24:08,548
- If you love your wife, how
can you possibly ask me that?
428
00:24:08,581 --> 00:24:11,851
- Because I love her that I can
ask.
429
00:24:11,885 --> 00:24:13,953
I live in the eye of this little
hurricane
430
00:24:14,054 --> 00:24:15,755
of misery and anguish, George.
431
00:24:18,058 --> 00:24:20,093
I only ask because she treated
432
00:24:20,126 --> 00:24:22,062
her last boyfriend most
abominably,
433
00:24:22,062 --> 00:24:22,662
as if he were some sort of
animal.
434
00:24:22,696 --> 00:24:23,663
Dirt under her feet.
435
00:24:23,697 --> 00:24:26,066
I felt sorry for him, myself.
436
00:24:28,501 --> 00:24:33,506
Oh, you didn't know there'd been
others.
437
00:24:33,540 --> 00:24:33,840
I'm sorry.
438
00:24:35,608 --> 00:24:36,843
I should have broken
it to you more gently.
439
00:24:38,545 --> 00:24:39,679
Yes, come to think of it,
440
00:24:39,713 --> 00:24:41,715
it's harder for a
boyfriend to find that out
441
00:24:41,748 --> 00:24:43,650
than a husband, really.
442
00:24:43,683 --> 00:24:46,886
There's so much ego
involved in being a lover.
443
00:24:46,920 --> 00:24:49,489
A husband doesn't have to
go on proving anything.
444
00:24:49,522 --> 00:24:51,925
Yes, she's quite a girl, our
woman.
445
00:24:53,593 --> 00:24:54,728
But I decided it had to stop.
446
00:24:55,662 --> 00:24:58,264
So I set out to kill the last
one.
447
00:24:58,998 --> 00:25:00,567
And I certainly would have,
448
00:25:00,600 --> 00:25:01,768
but for an unfortunate
occurrence.
449
00:25:03,803 --> 00:25:05,605
- What happened?
450
00:25:05,638 --> 00:25:08,508
- Oh, don't hope it will happen
again.
451
00:25:08,541 --> 00:25:10,043
I hadn't practiced using the
gun.
452
00:25:10,043 --> 00:25:11,945
I missed, hit him in the leg.
453
00:25:12,045 --> 00:25:13,046
Ironic, because I understand
454
00:25:13,046 --> 00:25:14,681
he's got a limp today, just like
mine.
455
00:25:16,349 --> 00:25:21,388
Anyway, he ran off, and I
allowed our woman to pacify me.
456
00:25:21,421 --> 00:25:23,056
It was a mistake.
457
00:25:23,056 --> 00:25:25,492
- Oh, oh, no, no, I don't know.
458
00:25:25,525 --> 00:25:27,560
Now, didn't you feel better
after?
459
00:25:27,594 --> 00:25:28,561
I mean, after you'd calmed down?
460
00:25:28,595 --> 00:25:31,231
- Yes, but then it all began
again.
461
00:25:32,198 --> 00:25:33,633
Nothing in life is ever really
cured,
462
00:25:33,667 --> 00:25:35,368
George, by calming down.
463
00:25:37,203 --> 00:25:38,705
One must keep one's
fire in the belly going.
464
00:25:40,540 --> 00:25:40,840
Stoke it up.
465
00:25:42,676 --> 00:25:43,476
Push the day's action to a
climax.
466
00:25:48,081 --> 00:25:50,083
Why don't you have a few more
drinks?
467
00:25:50,083 --> 00:25:51,785
No use going out with the
shakes.
468
00:25:56,589 --> 00:25:59,659
How did she treat you, George?
469
00:25:59,693 --> 00:26:00,260
- Very well, I suppose.
470
00:26:00,293 --> 00:26:01,761
Oh, I don't know!
471
00:26:01,795 --> 00:26:02,562
- You don't know?
472
00:26:02,595 --> 00:26:04,097
- No!
473
00:26:04,130 --> 00:26:05,565
- Does it embarrass you to talk
about her?
474
00:26:05,598 --> 00:26:09,836
- Yes, I suppose it does in a
way, yes.
475
00:26:09,869 --> 00:26:12,172
- Youth seems to be fashionable.
476
00:26:12,205 --> 00:26:13,173
- Youth?
477
00:26:13,206 --> 00:26:14,341
- Yeah.
478
00:26:14,374 --> 00:26:15,675
They're getting younger
and younger these days.
479
00:26:17,077 --> 00:26:19,646
You weren't on much of a poetic
plane with her, were you?
480
00:26:19,679 --> 00:26:22,582
All tickle and slap, was it?
481
00:26:22,615 --> 00:26:24,951
- I don't know very much
about women, really.
482
00:26:25,051 --> 00:26:27,053
- Oh, you aren't a married man?
483
00:26:27,087 --> 00:26:29,389
- No, no!
484
00:26:29,422 --> 00:26:30,690
- That's good.
485
00:26:30,724 --> 00:26:32,525
That makes it much easier for
me.
486
00:26:37,964 --> 00:26:40,100
- No, wait--
- Step out here.
487
00:26:40,133 --> 00:26:40,967
Come on.
488
00:26:42,302 --> 00:26:43,236
Come on.
489
00:26:43,269 --> 00:26:44,070
Turn around.
490
00:26:47,140 --> 00:26:49,075
I want to hear her say your
name.
491
00:26:49,809 --> 00:26:51,811
That's going to be the signal.
492
00:26:51,845 --> 00:26:53,813
When she says "George."
493
00:26:55,281 --> 00:26:57,150
- You are being rash.
494
00:26:57,851 --> 00:26:59,085
If we could only talk.
495
00:26:59,085 --> 00:27:01,621
- Oh, lower your hands,
you look ridiculous.
496
00:27:01,654 --> 00:27:03,056
It'll be the last sight of your
lives,
497
00:27:03,089 --> 00:27:05,525
so you might as well make
her think you're a brave boy.
498
00:27:05,558 --> 00:27:08,828
- Please, please, you can't.
499
00:27:15,268 --> 00:27:17,437
- I didn't think it was her.
500
00:27:17,470 --> 00:27:19,039
She's fast, but not that fast.
501
00:27:22,575 --> 00:27:23,510
Here, you dig for a while.
502
00:27:23,543 --> 00:27:25,779
Keep your mind off things.
503
00:27:27,080 --> 00:27:28,248
- Me?
504
00:27:28,281 --> 00:27:29,315
- Yes, hop in there.
505
00:27:31,451 --> 00:27:31,751
Go on.
506
00:27:39,626 --> 00:27:40,727
Well, dig!
507
00:27:47,667 --> 00:27:50,870
- You'll never get away
with this, you know.
508
00:27:50,904 --> 00:27:53,640
- Here, you're feeling
better already, aren't you?
509
00:27:53,673 --> 00:27:55,775
- They'll hang you.
510
00:27:55,809 --> 00:27:57,577
If there's a God in
heaven, they will hang you.
511
00:27:57,610 --> 00:28:00,246
- Yes, I fully expect they will.
512
00:28:01,681 --> 00:28:04,484
Unless I can establish a
diminished responsibility.
513
00:28:04,517 --> 00:28:05,618
Pressure of work and all that.
514
00:28:05,652 --> 00:28:06,753
Actually, I'm rather
looking forward to it.
515
00:28:08,788 --> 00:28:12,392
You see, George, I've given up.
516
00:28:13,927 --> 00:28:18,932
And like you, I need this woman
on a very permanent basis.
517
00:28:19,899 --> 00:28:22,769
I only feel at ease when I'm
with her.
518
00:28:24,371 --> 00:28:29,409
When she's beside me in a
room, my mind stops working,
519
00:28:32,045 --> 00:28:33,680
and the door closes on the
world,
520
00:28:33,713 --> 00:28:37,050
and all is well, and I'm at
home.
521
00:28:39,786 --> 00:28:41,254
I suppose she is my home.
522
00:28:42,655 --> 00:28:44,924
Can you understand?
523
00:28:46,493 --> 00:28:47,794
- Well, yes.
524
00:28:50,063 --> 00:28:51,798
I felt that way with my mother.
525
00:28:52,899 --> 00:28:55,335
- Yes, that would explain
why you never married.
526
00:28:56,803 --> 00:29:00,106
- Now, surely we can come
to some sort of agreement.
527
00:29:00,140 --> 00:29:03,009
What good is it going to do to
kill me?
528
00:29:03,009 --> 00:29:05,512
- It isn't a matter of good,
actually.
529
00:29:05,545 --> 00:29:08,682
- Killing me is not going to
make your wife a better woman.
530
00:29:10,116 --> 00:29:12,352
- I do wish you'd dig more and
talk less.
531
00:29:13,853 --> 00:29:16,690
- It isn't going to
make her love you more.
532
00:29:17,757 --> 00:29:20,760
- You're making it very
difficult for me.
533
00:29:20,794 --> 00:29:23,863
I don't want to start
feeling sympathy for you.
534
00:29:23,897 --> 00:29:26,900
- I don't deserve to die
for this, and you know it.
535
00:29:28,501 --> 00:29:30,870
Oh, look, it's not the same
today.
536
00:29:30,904 --> 00:29:32,405
A hundred years ago, yes.
537
00:29:32,439 --> 00:29:36,609
Then they thought of a woman
as a sort of possession.
538
00:29:36,643 --> 00:29:37,477
- Yes.
539
00:29:37,510 --> 00:29:38,745
- Like your horse.
540
00:29:38,778 --> 00:29:43,583
If a man stole your wife or
your horse, you shot him.
541
00:29:43,616 --> 00:29:44,551
- Mm.
542
00:29:44,584 --> 00:29:45,652
- But not anymore.
543
00:29:45,685 --> 00:29:49,122
No, we don't do that anymore
today.
544
00:29:50,557 --> 00:29:53,326
A man doesn't own a wife today.
545
00:29:53,360 --> 00:29:55,528
More likely the wife owns him.
546
00:29:55,562 --> 00:29:57,364
- Keep digging.
547
00:29:57,397 --> 00:29:58,398
I've made up my mind.
548
00:29:59,733 --> 00:30:01,234
Nothing is going to
change my mind this time.
549
00:30:01,267 --> 00:30:02,102
Nothing!
550
00:30:05,572 --> 00:30:09,242
- You'll never forgive yourself.
551
00:30:09,275 --> 00:30:10,710
It's an injustice.
552
00:30:10,744 --> 00:30:12,212
- It is not an injustice.
553
00:30:13,279 --> 00:30:13,780
I have ever moral right.
554
00:30:15,682 --> 00:30:18,952
Here, get inside.
555
00:30:20,086 --> 00:30:22,455
Get in there where I
can keep an eye on you.
556
00:30:31,631 --> 00:30:33,033
Close the door.
557
00:30:42,442 --> 00:30:46,413
- I would seem to be
at the end of my rope.
558
00:30:46,446 --> 00:30:48,415
But I still have a long way to
go.
559
00:30:48,448 --> 00:30:52,752
Our second half follows this
announcement
560
00:30:52,786 --> 00:30:57,057
from your friendly neighborhood
television station.
561
00:31:01,227 --> 00:31:02,062
- That's better.
562
00:31:03,063 --> 00:31:05,398
Extraordinary what a softening
effect
563
00:31:05,432 --> 00:31:07,434
the evening air has upon a man's
brain.
564
00:31:07,467 --> 00:31:10,470
I was almost beginning
to weaken out there.
565
00:31:12,072 --> 00:31:14,808
You don't look nearly as
deserving in here, I must say.
566
00:31:15,575 --> 00:31:17,711
All scared and sweaty.
567
00:31:18,712 --> 00:31:20,080
How could she bear you?
568
00:31:21,247 --> 00:31:23,183
Yes, I think I could shoot you
in here
569
00:31:23,216 --> 00:31:24,684
without feeling too much grief.
570
00:31:26,086 --> 00:31:29,656
- There is absolutely no
necessity for being rude.
571
00:31:29,689 --> 00:31:31,624
You yourself said there
was nothing personal.
572
00:31:31,658 --> 00:31:33,226
It's purely an accident of fate
573
00:31:33,259 --> 00:31:34,661
that I happen to be sitting
here.
574
00:31:34,694 --> 00:31:35,562
- True.
575
00:31:35,595 --> 00:31:36,629
- If she was as free and easy as
you say,
576
00:31:36,663 --> 00:31:37,364
it could easily have been
somebody else.
577
00:31:37,397 --> 00:31:38,832
- Do shut up.
578
00:31:38,865 --> 00:31:41,401
- I mean that I am not
responsible for the way I look.
579
00:31:41,434 --> 00:31:43,803
I did not design myself.
580
00:31:43,837 --> 00:31:46,973
- Don't worry, you're about
to undergo some alterations.
581
00:31:49,309 --> 00:31:51,177
Save a drop for me.
582
00:31:51,211 --> 00:31:52,812
I may want to get drunk later
on.
583
00:31:53,713 --> 00:31:54,714
- Oh.
584
00:31:56,116 --> 00:31:57,951
Oh, so you admit it.
585
00:31:59,119 --> 00:32:02,489
You don't want to go
through with this at all.
586
00:32:02,522 --> 00:32:04,224
- No, but I'm going to.
587
00:32:10,463 --> 00:32:13,400
- How did you know that
I was on that train?
588
00:32:13,433 --> 00:32:15,368
- I know about the whole
weekend.
589
00:32:15,402 --> 00:32:16,970
- A detective!
590
00:32:17,070 --> 00:32:18,171
You had her trailed.
591
00:32:18,204 --> 00:32:20,206
I didn't tell you, so she must
have.
592
00:32:20,240 --> 00:32:22,242
- On the contrary, you did tell
me.
593
00:32:22,275 --> 00:32:24,310
You gave me the whole plan.
594
00:32:24,344 --> 00:32:25,645
You know that habit she has
595
00:32:25,679 --> 00:32:27,347
of tucking things into
the top of her dress?
596
00:32:27,380 --> 00:32:29,516
- Yes, used tissues, mostly.
597
00:32:29,549 --> 00:32:30,917
Infuriating habit.
598
00:32:30,950 --> 00:32:34,220
- Well, that's where she tucked
your letter when it arrived.
599
00:32:34,254 --> 00:32:35,689
- Letter?
600
00:32:35,722 --> 00:32:36,656
Letter?
601
00:32:36,690 --> 00:32:38,958
What letter? I never wrote her a
letter.
602
00:32:38,992 --> 00:32:41,294
- Then she went out to do some
gardening, and it fell out.
603
00:32:41,327 --> 00:32:43,363
Surprising, because she's rather
604
00:32:43,396 --> 00:32:45,498
well endowed in that respect.
605
00:32:45,532 --> 00:32:47,300
Anyway, I found the letter the
next day,
606
00:32:47,334 --> 00:32:49,569
lying on the compost heap.
607
00:32:50,437 --> 00:32:52,839
"Dear darling baby."
608
00:32:52,872 --> 00:32:54,207
- But I never wrote her a
letter.
609
00:32:54,240 --> 00:32:55,642
Do you think I'm a fool?
610
00:32:55,675 --> 00:32:57,911
- Told me earlier you
didn't have a girlfriend.
611
00:32:57,944 --> 00:32:59,612
- Yes, but I never wrote her a
letter!
612
00:33:01,915 --> 00:33:02,382
- She must have left her car in
the town.
613
00:33:02,415 --> 00:33:04,117
Open the door.
614
00:33:04,150 --> 00:33:06,086
- Oh, no, no, no, no, now,
look, there has been a mistake.
615
00:33:06,119 --> 00:33:07,153
- Open the door.
616
00:33:07,187 --> 00:33:08,421
- No, look, you've got to listen
to me.
617
00:33:08,455 --> 00:33:09,055
- I want her to see you.
- I never wrote her a letter.
618
00:33:09,055 --> 00:33:09,622
- I want to hear her.
619
00:33:09,656 --> 00:33:10,690
I want her to see you die!
620
00:33:10,724 --> 00:33:11,191
- No, no, look, please,
please listen to me.
621
00:33:11,224 --> 00:33:12,392
I'm innocent.
622
00:33:12,425 --> 00:33:13,293
- Open the door!
- I'm not guilty.
623
00:33:15,195 --> 00:33:16,629
- Open the door.
624
00:33:25,372 --> 00:33:26,606
- My father saw your light.
625
00:33:26,639 --> 00:33:30,443
Look you, I brought you
your milk, Mr. George.
626
00:33:35,181 --> 00:33:36,883
- Thank you.
627
00:33:46,793 --> 00:33:49,496
- In front of that little girl.
628
00:33:51,498 --> 00:33:53,466
- I, I--
- Terrible thing.
629
00:33:53,500 --> 00:33:55,268
- I never wrote her a
letter.
630
00:33:55,301 --> 00:33:57,170
- It would have affected her
whole life.
631
00:33:57,203 --> 00:33:58,938
- I never wrote her a letter.
632
00:34:01,041 --> 00:34:04,377
I never wrote her a
letter in my whole life.
633
00:34:04,411 --> 00:34:06,513
I am innocent.
634
00:34:06,546 --> 00:34:08,548
- Oh, would you stop mumbling?
635
00:34:09,282 --> 00:34:10,450
You're not innocent.
636
00:34:11,284 --> 00:34:12,318
You admitted you're guilty.
637
00:34:12,352 --> 00:34:13,687
Even if you didn't write that
letter,
638
00:34:13,720 --> 00:34:15,055
you're still guilty, aren't you?
639
00:34:15,088 --> 00:34:16,322
- Yes, but I--
640
00:34:16,356 --> 00:34:17,357
- Oh, stop trying to squirm out
of it.
641
00:34:17,390 --> 00:34:19,693
Anyway, I don't believe you.
642
00:34:19,726 --> 00:34:21,461
- You've got to believe me!
643
00:34:26,099 --> 00:34:26,966
- There.
644
00:34:27,067 --> 00:34:28,134
There it is.
645
00:34:28,168 --> 00:34:30,337
Do you deny you wrote that
letter?
646
00:34:30,370 --> 00:34:31,204
- Oh!
647
00:34:32,772 --> 00:34:34,507
That's not my, I didn't write
that,
648
00:34:34,541 --> 00:34:37,077
that's not my handwriting.
649
00:34:37,077 --> 00:34:37,877
It's not!
650
00:34:40,380 --> 00:34:41,681
- "Dear darling,
651
00:34:42,615 --> 00:34:44,351
"I have missed you so
dreadfully,
652
00:34:44,384 --> 00:34:47,687
"dreadfully since last our lips
touched.
653
00:34:47,721 --> 00:34:50,156
"But baby must not think of
that,
654
00:34:50,190 --> 00:34:51,624
"or he will become too excited
655
00:34:51,658 --> 00:34:54,227
"to write his darling a letter.
656
00:34:54,260 --> 00:34:56,996
"All night baby has been
awake--"
657
00:34:57,097 --> 00:34:58,531
- Does that sound like me?
658
00:35:00,200 --> 00:35:01,334
- I confess you don't look the
type
659
00:35:01,368 --> 00:35:03,036
to write drivel like this.
660
00:35:03,036 --> 00:35:05,138
But then no man does, and
there's a lot of it written.
661
00:35:05,171 --> 00:35:05,939
- Wait a minute.
662
00:35:07,741 --> 00:35:09,309
Read that again.
663
00:35:09,342 --> 00:35:10,477
- "Wondering what his darling
664
00:35:10,510 --> 00:35:13,646
"has been doing with
her little self all day,
665
00:35:13,680 --> 00:35:15,548
"and if the dreadful ogre--"
666
00:35:15,582 --> 00:35:16,683
- Ogre, ogre, ogre.
667
00:35:17,384 --> 00:35:19,319
Look, that sounds like her.
668
00:35:19,352 --> 00:35:21,388
That's the way she writes.
669
00:35:21,421 --> 00:35:23,890
- Don't be ridiculous.
670
00:35:23,923 --> 00:35:26,059
Why would she write a
letter, sign your name to it,
671
00:35:26,059 --> 00:35:27,427
and then go to all the trouble
672
00:35:27,460 --> 00:35:29,062
of mailing it to herself
and having me find it?
673
00:35:29,062 --> 00:35:30,130
Sit down!
674
00:35:30,163 --> 00:35:30,964
- No!
675
00:35:31,064 --> 00:35:32,132
Now look.
676
00:35:32,165 --> 00:35:33,233
You look at this.
677
00:35:33,266 --> 00:35:35,835
Now look, that's my handwriting,
look!
678
00:35:45,078 --> 00:35:46,112
- You disguised your writing.
679
00:35:46,146 --> 00:35:49,549
- Oh, did I know that you
were going to find it?
680
00:35:52,485 --> 00:35:54,154
- No, no, that's true.
681
00:36:06,099 --> 00:36:06,933
Oh.
682
00:36:09,102 --> 00:36:10,203
- Yes.
683
00:36:10,236 --> 00:36:11,438
- Oh, no.
684
00:36:12,305 --> 00:36:15,108
- She knew you'd try to kill me.
685
00:36:16,309 --> 00:36:18,244
- You poor devil.
686
00:36:18,278 --> 00:36:19,312
How she must hate you.
687
00:36:19,346 --> 00:36:23,483
- Oh, don't feel sorry for me.
688
00:36:23,516 --> 00:36:25,652
No, she doesn't hate me.
689
00:36:25,685 --> 00:36:27,854
She doesn't feel anything for
me.
690
00:36:27,887 --> 00:36:31,424
I am merely a diversion for the
weekend.
691
00:36:34,194 --> 00:36:36,563
It's you she's after.
692
00:36:37,931 --> 00:36:38,765
- Me?
693
00:36:40,333 --> 00:36:42,569
- You'd hang if you killed me.
694
00:36:43,269 --> 00:36:45,739
- Oh.
695
00:36:45,772 --> 00:36:46,606
- It's clever.
696
00:36:47,707 --> 00:36:50,677
That way, she would be rid of
both of us.
697
00:36:50,710 --> 00:36:52,479
- No, no.
698
00:36:52,512 --> 00:36:54,147
- She's bored.
699
00:36:54,180 --> 00:36:55,181
She's always bored.
700
00:36:56,950 --> 00:37:01,287
I don't mean any more to her
than a fly on a windowpane.
701
00:37:01,321 --> 00:37:02,322
- She isn't that clever.
702
00:37:02,355 --> 00:37:04,357
She just isn't clever!
703
00:37:04,391 --> 00:37:06,126
- Isn't she?
704
00:37:08,028 --> 00:37:09,029
Isn't she?
705
00:37:10,096 --> 00:37:11,831
- It was the same last time!
706
00:37:11,865 --> 00:37:13,466
That other poor devil
707
00:37:13,500 --> 00:37:14,267
that I shot in the leg.
708
00:37:14,300 --> 00:37:15,702
It was a letter then.
709
00:37:15,735 --> 00:37:17,437
I found a letter that time too!
710
00:37:18,505 --> 00:37:20,440
Why didn't I see it then?
711
00:37:22,475 --> 00:37:24,644
- I know nobody's ever
tried to kill me before.
712
00:37:24,678 --> 00:37:25,779
- She planned the whole thing.
713
00:37:25,812 --> 00:37:28,181
Only it was supposed to happen
last time.
714
00:37:28,214 --> 00:37:32,052
- I'm not the kind of a
fellow that one tries to kill.
715
00:37:33,053 --> 00:37:34,320
- And to think I've been living
716
00:37:34,354 --> 00:37:36,056
with a murderess all this time.
717
00:37:37,323 --> 00:37:40,193
- It changes the whole world,
718
00:37:40,226 --> 00:37:42,495
knowing that somebody wants you
dead.
719
00:37:42,529 --> 00:37:45,065
Why, she could have killed
me any time she wants.
720
00:37:46,199 --> 00:37:47,300
The thought of her frightens me
now.
721
00:37:47,334 --> 00:37:48,768
She does frighten me.
722
00:37:49,636 --> 00:37:51,438
- I wonder if she's poisoned me.
723
00:37:51,471 --> 00:37:52,205
I haven't felt very well lately.
724
00:37:54,641 --> 00:37:57,577
- You know, I don't think
that I will ever be able
725
00:37:57,610 --> 00:38:00,246
to trust another woman as long
as I live.
726
00:38:00,280 --> 00:38:02,315
- She'll be here any minute.
727
00:38:02,349 --> 00:38:03,216
- Yes.
728
00:38:04,417 --> 00:38:06,720
Yes, just what are we going to
do?
729
00:38:06,753 --> 00:38:10,523
What is she going to do when
she finds out that we know?
730
00:38:10,557 --> 00:38:11,191
- Yes, what is she going to do?
731
00:38:11,224 --> 00:38:13,193
- Hm.
732
00:38:13,226 --> 00:38:17,697
Well, I'm leaving.
733
00:38:17,731 --> 00:38:18,531
I don't even want to see her.
734
00:38:20,500 --> 00:38:22,569
Yes, and you'd better come along
too.
735
00:38:22,602 --> 00:38:24,037
You know, she's capable of
anything.
736
00:38:24,037 --> 00:38:25,105
She's a monster.
737
00:38:25,138 --> 00:38:27,040
- No, no, no, I'm not leaving
her.
738
00:38:28,108 --> 00:38:29,042
- What?
739
00:38:29,042 --> 00:38:30,110
- I'll never leave her.
740
00:38:32,312 --> 00:38:33,346
She mustn't find out we've
worked it out.
741
00:38:33,380 --> 00:38:36,182
Promise me you won't tell her,
please!
742
00:38:36,216 --> 00:38:37,384
- But why?
743
00:38:37,417 --> 00:38:38,385
- Because if she knew we'd
worked it out,
744
00:38:38,418 --> 00:38:40,053
she'd have to leave me.
745
00:38:40,053 --> 00:38:42,222
Promise you won't tell her.
746
00:38:42,255 --> 00:38:44,290
- Well, all right.
747
00:38:44,324 --> 00:38:46,059
You can't live with her.
748
00:38:46,059 --> 00:38:47,160
She wants you dead.
749
00:38:47,193 --> 00:38:48,762
- I'll never leave her.
750
00:38:48,795 --> 00:38:50,730
- But she's tried to
kill you twice already.
751
00:38:50,764 --> 00:38:52,699
- Yes, but I don't mind that,
really.
752
00:38:54,167 --> 00:38:55,468
You see, murdering is like
hating,
753
00:38:55,502 --> 00:39:00,674
and hating is a form of loving,
you know?
754
00:39:00,707 --> 00:39:04,177
No, as long as she's alive,
I'll never leave her.
755
00:39:05,645 --> 00:39:06,479
- Oh.
756
00:39:07,280 --> 00:39:07,580
Well.
757
00:39:10,350 --> 00:39:11,384
I'm off.
758
00:39:13,653 --> 00:39:17,390
- I might be able to live
quite happily if she were dead.
759
00:39:17,424 --> 00:39:19,259
Then I could forget her, you
see.
760
00:39:19,292 --> 00:39:19,592
- Well,
761
00:39:20,660 --> 00:39:23,496
be sure to close the door when
you leave.
762
00:39:23,530 --> 00:39:24,297
- George!
763
00:39:24,330 --> 00:39:25,198
- Yes?
764
00:39:25,231 --> 00:39:27,267
- I'm sorry about tonight.
765
00:39:27,300 --> 00:39:28,735
I'm sorry you're involved.
766
00:39:30,170 --> 00:39:31,271
- That's quite all right.
767
00:39:31,304 --> 00:39:33,873
- When she does kill me, of
course,
768
00:39:33,907 --> 00:39:34,741
you'll be involved again,
769
00:39:34,774 --> 00:39:37,577
and I'll apologize for that in
advance.
770
00:39:44,050 --> 00:39:48,188
- How do you mean I
will be involved again?
771
00:39:48,221 --> 00:39:51,057
- Well, you're her boyfriend,
you're the man with a motive.
772
00:39:51,091 --> 00:39:51,925
They're bound to suspect you.
773
00:39:51,958 --> 00:39:54,060
And if I know her she'll do her
best
774
00:39:54,060 --> 00:39:56,196
to make it look as though
you're the guilty one.
775
00:39:57,597 --> 00:40:00,066
- Yes, she will, won't she?
776
00:40:00,066 --> 00:40:00,800
- I'm afraid so.
777
00:40:01,701 --> 00:40:02,502
I'm sorry.
778
00:40:08,708 --> 00:40:10,143
- What are we going to do?
779
00:40:11,444 --> 00:40:12,512
- I don't know.
780
00:40:14,314 --> 00:40:16,349
- This must be straightened out.
781
00:40:16,383 --> 00:40:18,985
I simply must get out of this
mess.
782
00:40:19,019 --> 00:40:20,587
I am a respectable man.
783
00:40:21,588 --> 00:40:23,890
- We could kill her.
784
00:40:23,923 --> 00:40:25,025
- I am not a murderer.
785
00:40:26,059 --> 00:40:28,061
- I've often thought about it.
786
00:40:28,094 --> 00:40:31,264
I might have the nerve to do
it if you were with me to help.
787
00:40:31,297 --> 00:40:33,800
That way we'd both be free.
788
00:40:35,235 --> 00:40:37,303
- That way we would both be
in jail, waiting to be hanged.
789
00:40:37,337 --> 00:40:38,972
- No, no, there's another way.
790
00:40:40,240 --> 00:40:42,942
As I told you, I've given
it a good deal of thought.
791
00:40:44,678 --> 00:40:47,514
You know that steep hill
leading down into the town?
792
00:40:48,748 --> 00:40:49,582
- Yes.
793
00:40:50,784 --> 00:40:52,886
- It's a very windy and
tricky road, isn't it?
794
00:40:53,953 --> 00:40:54,788
- Yes.
795
00:40:56,556 --> 00:40:59,259
- That's our solution, if we're
clever.
796
00:40:59,292 --> 00:41:01,127
Right.
797
00:41:47,273 --> 00:41:49,109
- Yoo hoo!
798
00:41:49,109 --> 00:41:50,143
Anybody home?
799
00:41:58,184 --> 00:41:59,019
George!
800
00:42:00,120 --> 00:42:00,954
George?
801
00:42:02,222 --> 00:42:04,290
- Hello, my dear.
802
00:42:04,324 --> 00:42:04,924
- You frightened the wits out of
me.
803
00:42:04,958 --> 00:42:06,126
What are you doing here?
804
00:42:06,159 --> 00:42:06,593
Where's George?
805
00:42:06,626 --> 00:42:09,062
- George is gone.
806
00:42:09,062 --> 00:42:10,497
- What do you mean, he's gone?
807
00:42:12,332 --> 00:42:13,333
- I roughed him up a bit.
808
00:42:13,366 --> 00:42:15,435
And he decided that discretion
809
00:42:15,468 --> 00:42:18,204
outweighed his passion for you,
my dear.
810
00:42:18,238 --> 00:42:19,806
He fled.
811
00:42:21,441 --> 00:42:22,609
- Who are you kidding?
812
00:42:22,642 --> 00:42:24,411
You couldn't rough up
a blanket, you coward.
813
00:42:24,444 --> 00:42:26,880
- You used to call me baby.
814
00:42:32,318 --> 00:42:34,154
- Where'd he go?
815
00:42:35,255 --> 00:42:37,290
George?
816
00:42:37,323 --> 00:42:38,391
George!
817
00:42:38,425 --> 00:42:40,360
- It's no use calling him, my
dear.
818
00:42:40,393 --> 00:42:41,528
He's gone.
819
00:42:42,462 --> 00:42:45,632
We had a little talk, and he
left.
820
00:42:45,665 --> 00:42:48,001
- If you turned him
against me, I'll kill you.
821
00:42:49,769 --> 00:42:51,104
- I explained my position,
822
00:42:51,137 --> 00:42:55,942
and he agreed that I had
just and prior rights to you.
823
00:42:55,975 --> 00:42:59,179
Since your dear husband
doesn't go away so often.
824
00:42:59,212 --> 00:43:00,180
George and I have come
825
00:43:00,213 --> 00:43:03,249
to a complete agreement
about your weekends.
826
00:43:03,283 --> 00:43:06,353
- Are you mad?
827
00:43:06,386 --> 00:43:08,188
I wouldn't so much as shake
hands with you
828
00:43:08,221 --> 00:43:10,123
if I were wearing rubber gloves.
829
00:43:11,157 --> 00:43:11,491
What did you tell him?
830
00:43:13,793 --> 00:43:17,664
- I told him I loved you, which
is true.
831
00:43:18,398 --> 00:43:18,932
- Get away from me.
832
00:43:18,965 --> 00:43:19,432
Where'd he go?
833
00:43:19,466 --> 00:43:21,067
- Please don't go.
834
00:43:21,067 --> 00:43:21,768
Stay just a little while.
835
00:43:21,801 --> 00:43:23,536
- George!
- For your own good!
836
00:43:24,270 --> 00:43:25,238
I'm warning you.
837
00:43:25,271 --> 00:43:28,141
- You're warning me?
838
00:43:28,174 --> 00:43:29,509
Any more nonsense from you,
839
00:43:29,542 --> 00:43:32,812
and I'll have my husband put
a kink in your other leg.
840
00:43:32,846 --> 00:43:33,680
- You!
841
00:43:42,088 --> 00:43:43,456
You're nothing but a tramp!
842
00:43:44,357 --> 00:43:47,093
A high-class tramp!
843
00:43:48,161 --> 00:43:49,996
Go on, then, go on!
844
00:43:50,096 --> 00:43:51,097
I don't care!
845
00:43:52,098 --> 00:43:54,000
- Thank you for the high class.
846
00:43:54,100 --> 00:43:55,735
I'm going to the station
to pick up George.
847
00:43:55,769 --> 00:43:57,237
If you're here when I get back,
848
00:43:58,405 --> 00:43:59,506
I pity you.
849
00:44:04,477 --> 00:44:06,046
- Pity yourself.
850
00:45:30,063 --> 00:45:32,098
- She tried to kill us.
851
00:45:33,566 --> 00:45:35,735
She tried to kill both of us.
852
00:45:42,075 --> 00:45:44,244
Shouldn't I call the police?
853
00:45:44,277 --> 00:45:45,378
Yes, they should be up here
shortly.
854
00:45:45,412 --> 00:45:48,548
They will know that I
have heard the crash,
855
00:45:48,581 --> 00:45:49,749
and they most certainly will
have
856
00:45:49,783 --> 00:45:51,518
heard about it down in the town.
857
00:45:52,485 --> 00:45:53,353
- They'll be along soon enough.
858
00:45:53,386 --> 00:45:55,255
- Yes.
859
00:45:55,288 --> 00:45:56,890
Then what should we do?
860
00:45:56,923 --> 00:45:58,792
- Well, if I were you,
I'd run down to the curve
861
00:45:58,825 --> 00:46:01,261
and show a little concern over
the corpse.
862
00:46:01,294 --> 00:46:02,629
They'll recognize her car,
863
00:46:02,662 --> 00:46:06,099
and people know she was
your girlfriend, don't they?
864
00:46:06,132 --> 00:46:07,567
- Oh, yes.
865
00:46:07,600 --> 00:46:10,036
Yes, I'll go down there right
away.
866
00:46:10,070 --> 00:46:11,271
Are you coming?
867
00:46:11,304 --> 00:46:12,305
- I'm not supposed to be here.
868
00:46:12,339 --> 00:46:13,306
- Oh, of course.
869
00:46:13,340 --> 00:46:15,475
- George.
- Yes?
870
00:46:17,477 --> 00:46:19,646
- What about this grave here?
871
00:46:19,679 --> 00:46:22,482
It's going to look rather
suspicious, isn't it?
872
00:46:22,515 --> 00:46:23,750
To the police, I mean.
873
00:46:25,752 --> 00:46:28,922
- Oh, good heavens, yes, I've
forgotten all about that.
874
00:46:30,223 --> 00:46:32,359
But how am I going to be
able to fill that in in time?
875
00:46:32,392 --> 00:46:33,526
I won't be able to.
876
00:46:33,560 --> 00:46:35,161
How am I going to be able to
explain it?
877
00:46:35,195 --> 00:46:36,162
- You'd better think of
something.
878
00:46:36,196 --> 00:46:37,530
That little girl saw it, didn't
she?
879
00:46:39,265 --> 00:46:41,568
- Oh, yes!
880
00:46:41,601 --> 00:46:44,070
The Williams girl, I forgot!
881
00:46:44,070 --> 00:46:46,106
- It's certainly going
to look very suspicious.
882
00:46:46,139 --> 00:46:46,973
- Oh.
883
00:46:48,074 --> 00:46:49,976
- Well, I'm going home.
884
00:46:50,076 --> 00:46:51,411
- Now, wait a minute,
you're in on this too!
885
00:46:51,444 --> 00:46:54,080
- It'd be bad if I were seen
about.
886
00:46:54,080 --> 00:46:55,382
Got a light, George?
887
00:46:55,415 --> 00:46:57,083
- Oh, yes.
888
00:46:57,083 --> 00:46:58,451
Now, look, you have to help me.
889
00:46:58,485 --> 00:47:01,087
I simply cannot do everything
alone.
890
00:47:03,156 --> 00:47:04,691
- Thanks.
891
00:47:04,724 --> 00:47:06,459
- I mean, unless you do help me,
892
00:47:06,493 --> 00:47:07,527
the police will be able to
figure out
893
00:47:07,560 --> 00:47:09,029
everything that happened.
894
00:47:10,363 --> 00:47:11,798
- Yes, well, you'd better
get rid of that wingnut.
895
00:47:11,831 --> 00:47:12,732
And the hammer.
896
00:47:14,034 --> 00:47:16,269
The lead will have come off
on the wingnut, you know.
897
00:47:16,302 --> 00:47:18,171
Very dangerous bit of evidence,
that.
898
00:47:18,204 --> 00:47:19,239
Oh, by the way, you might get
899
00:47:19,272 --> 00:47:21,508
that car grease off your hands.
900
00:47:21,541 --> 00:47:22,742
It's very noticeable.
901
00:47:23,710 --> 00:47:26,513
And don't forget your
fingerprints.
902
00:47:28,648 --> 00:47:32,385
- Listen, look, unless you help
me,
903
00:47:32,419 --> 00:47:33,620
I am going to tell the police
904
00:47:33,653 --> 00:47:35,288
that it was her husband who
helped me.
905
00:47:35,321 --> 00:47:36,389
Now, you are an accessory!
906
00:47:36,423 --> 00:47:38,358
- Yes, well, you do that,
George.
907
00:47:38,391 --> 00:47:39,959
You do that.
908
00:47:40,060 --> 00:47:42,495
You tell them her husband gave
you a hand.
909
00:47:45,832 --> 00:47:46,666
- Who are you?
910
00:47:47,467 --> 00:47:48,835
You're not her husband.
911
00:47:49,969 --> 00:47:51,404
- Did I say I was?
912
00:47:51,438 --> 00:47:52,706
I don't remember that.
913
00:47:53,773 --> 00:47:54,441
Really, you'd better hurry.
914
00:47:58,078 --> 00:48:00,213
- Wait one moment.
915
00:48:00,246 --> 00:48:02,916
You said you had never been here
before.
916
00:48:04,184 --> 00:48:04,484
- Goodbye, George.
917
00:48:07,020 --> 00:48:08,788
That's a good fellow.
918
00:48:12,759 --> 00:48:14,728
- I'm going to tell them what
happened!
919
00:48:15,929 --> 00:48:18,064
I'm going to tell them
everything that happened!
920
00:48:22,402 --> 00:48:25,438
I'm going to tell them
exactly what happened!
921
00:48:54,267 --> 00:48:56,803
There was this man.
922
00:48:58,071 --> 00:48:58,571
I met him on the train.
923
00:49:01,307 --> 00:49:04,044
There was this man.
924
00:49:05,879 --> 00:49:08,748
You see, I did meet him on the
train.
925
00:49:16,589 --> 00:49:20,460
- George was not the only
one to go down to defeat.
926
00:49:20,493 --> 00:49:22,562
The authorities insisted
927
00:49:22,595 --> 00:49:25,065
that the stranger go with him to
prison.
928
00:49:25,098 --> 00:49:28,435
They have enough trouble
coping with crime as it is
929
00:49:28,468 --> 00:49:31,204
and just didn't want to
break up a losing team.
930
00:49:31,237 --> 00:49:34,674
That concludes tonight's episode
931
00:49:34,708 --> 00:49:38,778
in Brother Alfred's own
theater of the absurd.
932
00:49:38,812 --> 00:49:41,881
He plans to present some more
buffoonery
933
00:49:41,915 --> 00:49:44,117
when he returns next time.
934
00:49:53,193 --> 00:49:54,661
If he returns.
64750
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.