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1
00:00:02,381 --> 00:00:05,143
Hey, Greg.
Hold on a second.
2
00:00:05,177 --> 00:00:07,593
Hey. What's going on? Hello.
Welcome to Hell.
3
00:00:07,628 --> 00:00:09,664
Got any debit cards?
4
00:00:09,699 --> 00:00:13,392
We are about to release
the sequel to "Fried Alive"
5
00:00:13,427 --> 00:00:16,223
for you, our fans,
which means more blood,
6
00:00:16,257 --> 00:00:17,776
more boobs, more batter.
7
00:00:17,810 --> 00:00:20,848
So, batter up for
an extra crispy good time.
8
00:00:20,882 --> 00:00:23,333
We only need $400,000
9
00:00:23,368 --> 00:00:26,198
and put a fork in it...
Our financing's done.
10
00:00:26,233 --> 00:00:28,718
At the $5 level,
our tater tot level,
11
00:00:28,752 --> 00:00:31,721
you get a exclusive
e-mail updates from...
12
00:00:31,755 --> 00:00:35,104
That's a cool collection.
13
00:00:35,138 --> 00:00:37,865
Thank you, yeah.
Y-You see my Italian poster?
14
00:00:37,899 --> 00:00:38,969
It's super rare.
15
00:00:39,004 --> 00:00:40,523
It's "Il Fritto Vivo!"
16
00:00:40,557 --> 00:00:42,870
I'm talking about
the credit cards, you idiot.
17
00:00:42,904 --> 00:00:44,296
You been swiping wallets
off the noobs
18
00:00:44,320 --> 00:00:45,642
coming down the chute,
so you can do what,
19
00:00:45,666 --> 00:00:47,461
start your own Planet Hollywood
down here?
20
00:00:47,495 --> 00:00:49,428
Nothing so prestigious as that.
21
00:00:49,463 --> 00:00:52,569
If I give $75,
I can be an executive producer
22
00:00:52,604 --> 00:00:55,089
on the new "Fried Alive."
They're making a new one?!
23
00:00:55,124 --> 00:00:56,608
Oh, that franchise
hasn't been right
24
00:00:56,642 --> 00:00:58,092
since they went to space.
25
00:00:58,127 --> 00:00:59,887
Yeah, "Freeze Dried Alive." Well... Yes!
26
00:00:59,921 --> 00:01:02,200
Do you remember
when he tried to fry
27
00:01:02,234 --> 00:01:03,891
Saturn's rings?! Fry Saturn's rings!
28
00:01:03,925 --> 00:01:06,273
Why was NASA sending a fry chef,
29
00:01:06,307 --> 00:01:09,207
who was a murderer, into space?
30
00:01:09,241 --> 00:01:11,381
Oh, let me watch this pitch
here. Let's see.
31
00:01:11,416 --> 00:01:13,659
Then you can make
"Fried Alive 11:
32
00:01:13,694 --> 00:01:16,006
Hail to the Chef" a reality.
33
00:01:16,041 --> 00:01:18,561
Rudy, the root of all evil,
is back.
34
00:01:18,595 --> 00:01:20,908
And now he's head chef
at the White House.
35
00:01:20,942 --> 00:01:23,635
So when the president, the
cabinet, and all of Congress
36
00:01:23,669 --> 00:01:26,293
mysteriously get
deep fried to death,
37
00:01:26,327 --> 00:01:28,985
Rudy is sworn in
as Commander in Chief.
38
00:01:29,019 --> 00:01:30,607
With Rudy's finger
on the button,
39
00:01:30,642 --> 00:01:34,163
global conflicts are
about to get extra crispy.
40
00:01:34,197 --> 00:01:35,612
Rudy cannot speak!
41
00:01:35,647 --> 00:01:38,098
How is he supposed
to talk about legislature?!
42
00:01:38,132 --> 00:01:41,170
I-I know! How is he supposed
to do fireside chats?
43
00:01:41,204 --> 00:01:43,103
The formula for "Fried Alive"
is simple...
44
00:01:43,137 --> 00:01:44,425
All you need is Rudy,
a deep fryer,
45
00:01:44,449 --> 00:01:45,691
and a chick with big tits.
46
00:01:45,726 --> 00:01:47,762
It's a hero's journey
into the fryer.
47
00:01:47,797 --> 00:01:49,947
We could write the next
"Fried Alive." We definitely should.
48
00:01:49,971 --> 00:01:51,535
We areare gonna write the next
"Fried Alive."
49
00:01:51,559 --> 00:01:53,158
We're not actually going to.
No, we're going to do it.
50
00:01:53,182 --> 00:01:54,607
Why can't we write it?
Gary, come on.
51
00:01:54,631 --> 00:01:57,772
You and me.
Anton McDuffy
owns the rights.
52
00:01:57,807 --> 00:02:00,706
Sequel...
53
00:02:00,741 --> 00:02:02,191
How did you do that?
Yeah.
54
00:02:02,225 --> 00:02:04,124
He uploaded that video,
like, a week ago.
55
00:02:04,158 --> 00:02:06,022
Who's writing the next
"Fried Alive" now?!
56
00:02:06,056 --> 00:02:07,196
You and...
57
00:02:13,650 --> 00:02:16,066
♪♪
58
00:02:25,317 --> 00:02:28,286
Welcome to day one
of the writer's retreat.
59
00:02:28,320 --> 00:02:31,151
Home, sweet home, huh?
60
00:02:31,185 --> 00:02:34,292
Get comfy, and then we're gonna
write the new "Fried Alive."
61
00:02:34,326 --> 00:02:36,017
Revived and refried.
62
00:02:36,052 --> 00:02:38,641
Troy's getting
the party started. Do we have any limes?
63
00:02:38,675 --> 00:02:40,332
There's a lime tree
down in the basement.
64
00:02:40,367 --> 00:02:42,679
I'll be right back.
65
00:02:42,714 --> 00:02:50,714
♪♪
66
00:02:51,688 --> 00:02:59,688
♪♪
67
00:03:02,734 --> 00:03:05,219
You know, when Gary and I
hatched this crazy idea
68
00:03:05,254 --> 00:03:06,841
to write a "Fried Alive" script,
69
00:03:06,876 --> 00:03:09,568
we decided we wanted to do
something fresh and original,
70
00:03:09,603 --> 00:03:12,261
but with that classic Rudy feel.
71
00:03:12,295 --> 00:03:14,021
So, uh... put
your thinking caps on,
72
00:03:14,055 --> 00:03:15,540
just start throwing ideas as us.
73
00:03:15,574 --> 00:03:17,369
See, as long as all the ideas
take place
74
00:03:17,404 --> 00:03:19,233
with Rudy having access
to a fryer
75
00:03:19,268 --> 00:03:21,201
so all of the action of the film
76
00:03:21,235 --> 00:03:22,512
happens inside of a diner.
77
00:03:22,547 --> 00:03:25,135
Okay, I think it could
be, maybe, scarier
78
00:03:25,170 --> 00:03:26,758
if he, like, could
leave the diner,
79
00:03:26,792 --> 00:03:28,104
get out of his element,
80
00:03:28,138 --> 00:03:30,348
and, like, see if
he could get people...
81
00:03:30,382 --> 00:03:31,521
I think...
No.
82
00:03:31,556 --> 00:03:34,110
No. Uh, Rudy lives
in the diner.
83
00:03:34,144 --> 00:03:37,217
He lives behind the fryer.
And who are you?
84
00:03:37,251 --> 00:03:39,529
I'm Ashley,
and I will say, Satan,
85
00:03:39,564 --> 00:03:41,773
even though women are
50% of the population,
86
00:03:41,807 --> 00:03:46,605
I am thrilled to be one-sixth
of this writers' room.
87
00:03:46,640 --> 00:03:48,711
I have never met you before.
Well, technically,
88
00:03:48,745 --> 00:03:50,437
you're one-seventh
of the writers' room.
89
00:03:50,471 --> 00:03:51,921
Don't forget about Johnny.
90
00:03:54,613 --> 00:03:56,236
What's going on there, Johnny?
91
00:03:56,270 --> 00:03:58,617
I'm writing the theme music
in my mind...
92
00:03:58,652 --> 00:03:59,825
Theme music.
93
00:04:07,868 --> 00:04:09,732
Let's go check that out!
94
00:04:09,766 --> 00:04:11,320
Come on.Yeah. We probably should.
95
00:04:11,354 --> 00:04:12,631
Satan: Troy?! Troy?
96
00:04:12,666 --> 00:04:13,908
What's wrong?
97
00:04:13,943 --> 00:04:15,255
Oh, something grabbed me!
98
00:04:15,289 --> 00:04:17,567
With hands like...
Like two fried catfish
99
00:04:17,602 --> 00:04:19,604
and long crispy fingers! No, no.
100
00:04:19,638 --> 00:04:22,745
Troy, Troy!
Relax, relax.
101
00:04:22,779 --> 00:04:25,989
I'm sure it's nothing.
102
00:04:28,682 --> 00:04:31,650
Oh.
It's just my 50 cats.
103
00:04:31,685 --> 00:04:34,446
Yeah, I feed them
these fish sticks.
104
00:04:34,481 --> 00:04:36,483
You probably thought
those were fingers.
105
00:04:36,517 --> 00:04:39,451
Ew!
106
00:04:39,486 --> 00:04:41,453
That's what it was probably,
I guess.
107
00:04:41,488 --> 00:04:46,700
What if Rudy eats a raw camper
in his sleeping bag
108
00:04:46,734 --> 00:04:48,633
like a sushi roll? Rudy's not some kind of,
109
00:04:48,667 --> 00:04:50,324
like, travel blog, like foodie,
110
00:04:50,359 --> 00:04:52,775
raw food-to-table
kind of guy, okay?
111
00:04:52,809 --> 00:04:55,295
He fries people like
carnival food, so...
112
00:04:55,329 --> 00:04:56,848
Claude: Okay.
I have a pitch.
113
00:04:56,882 --> 00:04:59,022
So, everybody knows
that all these movies
114
00:04:59,057 --> 00:05:00,679
are totally lame and hacky.
115
00:05:00,714 --> 00:05:04,718
So we do the behind the scenes
of a making of a "Fried Alive,"
116
00:05:04,752 --> 00:05:08,342
but Rudy starts killing
the cast and crew.
117
00:05:08,377 --> 00:05:11,138
See, and we intercut them dying
118
00:05:11,172 --> 00:05:12,622
with the movie they're making.
119
00:05:12,657 --> 00:05:15,453
But we're... we are making
a "Fried Alive" movie.
120
00:05:15,487 --> 00:05:18,663
And we'd be making a movie
about fictitious people
121
00:05:18,697 --> 00:05:20,917
making a movie. Other people making
a "Fried Alive" movie.
122
00:05:20,941 --> 00:05:24,082
Yes. So we're gonna hire a whole
other production company
123
00:05:24,116 --> 00:05:25,532
to make another movie.
124
00:05:25,566 --> 00:05:27,637
No, we're gonna hire
one production company
125
00:05:27,672 --> 00:05:29,674
to make it look
like there's another
126
00:05:29,708 --> 00:05:31,745
production company
making a movie.
127
00:05:31,779 --> 00:05:32,987
It's meta, Gary.
128
00:05:33,022 --> 00:05:37,371
Oh, well, I never metaidea
I liked less.
129
00:05:39,200 --> 00:05:40,823
Other ideas, please.
130
00:05:40,857 --> 00:05:43,204
What if Rudy dies, okay,
131
00:05:43,239 --> 00:05:45,379
and has a sister
who carries on his name?
132
00:05:45,414 --> 00:05:46,874
A female reboot.
I like it. I like it.
133
00:05:46,898 --> 00:05:48,289
No. No.Write it down, write it down.
134
00:05:48,313 --> 00:05:49,659
No. No.
Yes. Yes, down.
135
00:05:49,694 --> 00:05:51,040
Write it.
I will not.
136
00:05:51,074 --> 00:05:52,776
He's an only child.
Right, I never watched it...
137
00:05:52,800 --> 00:05:55,285
He was raised alone
in a vat of fetuses
138
00:05:55,320 --> 00:05:57,874
by the evil Nazi
Dr. Melchior.
139
00:05:57,909 --> 00:05:59,497
How far are we gonna soften him?
140
00:05:59,531 --> 00:06:00,577
Why don't we do a thing
where he goes,
141
00:06:00,601 --> 00:06:01,740
and he moves to the suburbs
142
00:06:01,775 --> 00:06:03,846
and he meets
the lovely Tara Reid,
143
00:06:03,880 --> 00:06:05,744
and they...
And he gets an office job.
144
00:06:05,779 --> 00:06:07,297
And he has two or three kids.
145
00:06:07,332 --> 00:06:08,585
Um, I mean that...
That could work.
146
00:06:08,609 --> 00:06:09,610
That might humanize him.
147
00:06:09,645 --> 00:06:12,751
You cannothumanize...
148
00:06:12,786 --> 00:06:17,584
something that wasn't human
to begin with.
149
00:06:17,618 --> 00:06:19,586
We're making some kind of, oh...
150
00:06:19,620 --> 00:06:21,864
"Sisterhood of the Traveling
Rudy Pants."
151
00:06:21,898 --> 00:06:24,418
"How Rudy Got
His Groove Back."
152
00:06:24,453 --> 00:06:26,869
We making one of those?
153
00:06:26,903 --> 00:06:29,699
He fries heads, bodies,
and titties,
154
00:06:29,734 --> 00:06:32,461
and he eats them...
End of story.
155
00:06:32,495 --> 00:06:34,532
Then why in the hell are
we brainstorming?
156
00:06:34,566 --> 00:06:35,888
We're trying to come up
with different ways
157
00:06:35,912 --> 00:06:39,329
for him to trick busty coeds
into the fryer.
158
00:06:39,364 --> 00:06:42,436
Who's Rudy?
159
00:06:42,471 --> 00:06:43,758
Satan: I think we're
gonna call it a day.
160
00:06:43,782 --> 00:06:45,474
We... We made a lot of progress,
161
00:06:45,508 --> 00:06:47,303
and we're gonna go
right back at it tomorrow.
162
00:06:47,337 --> 00:06:49,063
♪♪
163
00:06:50,271 --> 00:06:54,552
♪♪
164
00:06:54,586 --> 00:06:57,313
Eddie: This water is thick.
165
00:06:57,347 --> 00:06:59,246
And yellow.
166
00:06:59,280 --> 00:07:07,280
♪♪
167
00:07:08,220 --> 00:07:09,670
Do you mind, Ashley?
168
00:07:09,705 --> 00:07:13,571
Oh. I am...
so sorry.
169
00:07:13,605 --> 00:07:14,986
Leave the shower on.
170
00:07:15,020 --> 00:07:17,102
I'm gonna go in there
once I'm done grunting this out.
171
00:07:17,126 --> 00:07:18,990
Okay.
Yes, okay.
172
00:07:30,346 --> 00:07:33,142
Ahh!
173
00:07:45,741 --> 00:07:48,295
Corn meal?
That's not normal?
174
00:07:48,329 --> 00:07:49,779
Rudy's back!
175
00:07:49,814 --> 00:07:50,953
It's Rudy!
176
00:07:50,987 --> 00:07:52,402
Is the... um...
Is the shower free?
177
00:07:52,437 --> 00:07:53,507
Are you done?
No!
178
00:07:53,542 --> 00:07:55,475
The shower's shooting corn meal.
179
00:07:55,509 --> 00:07:57,511
It's probably
just the pipes settling.
180
00:07:59,340 --> 00:08:02,792
Eddie?!
181
00:08:02,827 --> 00:08:05,657
If he can fry us this far away
from the diner,
182
00:08:05,692 --> 00:08:08,039
then he can do anything!
183
00:08:08,073 --> 00:08:10,144
I'm very sorry, Ashley.
You are correct.
184
00:08:10,179 --> 00:08:12,630
It's much scarier
if he can leave the diner.
185
00:08:12,664 --> 00:08:15,218
Everybody get back inside,
get a weapon.
186
00:08:15,253 --> 00:08:16,737
Move, now.
187
00:08:16,772 --> 00:08:18,049
All right.
188
00:08:18,083 --> 00:08:19,499
He's prepping us.
189
00:08:19,533 --> 00:08:21,811
One by one, he's prepping us.
190
00:08:21,846 --> 00:08:24,331
All of our brainstorming here
in the cabin has stirred up
191
00:08:24,365 --> 00:08:27,645
some... some psychic residue
that has created a real Rudy.
192
00:08:27,679 --> 00:08:29,036
Oh, yeah, is that
how it works?
Yeah.
193
00:08:29,060 --> 00:08:32,581
Guy, you see all these
spigots pointing inward?
194
00:08:32,615 --> 00:08:35,066
They're dripping canola oil.
195
00:08:35,100 --> 00:08:36,895
Look.
It's metal wiring.
196
00:08:36,930 --> 00:08:39,173
It's kind of like a...
Like a fry basket.
197
00:08:39,208 --> 00:08:42,004
The house is a fryer!
It's a deep fryer!
198
00:08:42,038 --> 00:08:43,568
All right, listen,
the only way to beat him
199
00:08:43,592 --> 00:08:45,352
is if we all stick together.
200
00:08:45,386 --> 00:08:46,733
But I'm gonna go upstairs.
201
00:08:46,767 --> 00:08:50,944
He has locked us in here
to lock in our flavors.
202
00:08:50,978 --> 00:08:53,256
He wants to get through
our golden crust
203
00:08:53,291 --> 00:08:54,741
to our moist middles.
204
00:08:54,775 --> 00:08:56,674
You haven't watched
the entire franchise.
205
00:08:56,708 --> 00:09:00,367
You don't know what
he's capable of, man!
206
00:09:02,300 --> 00:09:04,751
Rudy's coming to get us
through the fireplace!
207
00:09:04,785 --> 00:09:05,959
Oh!
208
00:09:14,623 --> 00:09:16,866
How many cats does
this guy have?
209
00:09:19,835 --> 00:09:21,319
♪♪
210
00:09:21,353 --> 00:09:23,493
Get your stuff.
211
00:09:23,528 --> 00:09:25,495
Just stand here.
212
00:09:27,428 --> 00:09:29,258
Come on.
213
00:09:30,431 --> 00:09:32,399
Yeah.
214
00:09:32,433 --> 00:09:35,575
All right, look.
Here's the deal.
215
00:09:35,609 --> 00:09:37,231
Satan's doing this whole thing
216
00:09:37,266 --> 00:09:39,106
where we're in a movie,
and we're getting chased around.
217
00:09:39,130 --> 00:09:41,581
It's the meta thing, basically,
that I pitched.
218
00:09:41,615 --> 00:09:43,110
I don't know if Gary's
in on it or not,
219
00:09:43,134 --> 00:09:44,238
'cause he might not be
220
00:09:44,273 --> 00:09:46,068
mentally capable enough
to pull it off.
221
00:09:46,102 --> 00:09:48,726
So, if you want to be
running around all night
222
00:09:48,760 --> 00:09:50,935
being part of the charade,
that's fine, but I'm out.
223
00:09:50,969 --> 00:09:52,488
So, um...
224
00:09:52,522 --> 00:09:56,112
see you guys on Monday.
225
00:09:58,563 --> 00:09:59,978
Troy: Wait.
We can do that?
226
00:10:04,500 --> 00:10:06,744
Ugh. There's only
one bullet in this.
227
00:10:06,778 --> 00:10:09,919
Come on, come on.
Come on, come on.
228
00:10:09,954 --> 00:10:11,749
So you guys gotta tighten up
here, come on.
229
00:10:11,783 --> 00:10:13,613
Stop screwing around. Ashley: Okay, yeah.
230
00:10:15,028 --> 00:10:17,030
Troy, Ash...
It's Rudy!
Rudy's coming!
231
00:10:17,064 --> 00:10:20,033
No, it's Rudy! Aw, damn it.
232
00:10:20,067 --> 00:10:21,310
I'm sorry, Rudy.
233
00:10:22,518 --> 00:10:25,107
Claude ruins...
everything.
234
00:10:35,358 --> 00:10:36,705
Morning, Gary.
235
00:10:36,739 --> 00:10:40,640
So relieved to see
you escaped Rudy's clutches.
236
00:10:40,674 --> 00:10:42,331
Yeah, I mean, honestly,
I think this time,
237
00:10:42,365 --> 00:10:43,573
we got Rudy for good.
238
00:10:43,608 --> 00:10:45,058
You're being sarcastic.
239
00:10:45,092 --> 00:10:47,577
'Cause being in a horror movie
is a solid torture.
240
00:10:47,612 --> 00:10:49,072
Come on, I knew the second
we pulled up
241
00:10:49,096 --> 00:10:50,511
to the cabin
that something was up.
242
00:10:50,546 --> 00:10:51,868
Yeah, Gary,
it was pretty predictable.
243
00:10:51,892 --> 00:10:53,963
Who are you? Yeah, it was a fail.
244
00:10:53,998 --> 00:10:56,690
I'm shutting it down. No, no, no, no!
245
00:10:56,725 --> 00:10:58,243
We already got the cabin built.
246
00:10:58,278 --> 00:10:59,589
We'll just run it again...
247
00:10:59,624 --> 00:11:02,869
Dumber people, fewer clues.
248
00:11:02,903 --> 00:11:07,045
Here we are.
Day one of the writer's retreat.
249
00:11:07,080 --> 00:11:10,497
Let me guess,
the whole cabin is a fryer?
250
00:11:10,531 --> 00:11:11,532
Yeah, it is.
251
00:11:11,567 --> 00:11:13,051
I'll see you guys Monday.
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