Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:26,494 --> 00:00:29,029
[ BEEPING ]
2
00:00:47,648 --> 00:00:49,750
[ HIGH-PITCHED BEEP ]
3
00:00:52,486 --> 00:00:53,554
>> [ ROARS ]
4
00:00:56,824 --> 00:00:58,392
[ WHIP CRACKING ]
5
00:00:58,392 --> 00:01:00,561
>> [ SCREAMING ]
6
00:01:09,337 --> 00:01:10,238
>> [ SIGHS ]
7
00:01:10,238 --> 00:01:10,604
GOD.
8
00:01:10,604 --> 00:01:12,273
I DON'T KNOW WHO'S GETTING
9
00:01:12,273 --> 00:01:14,007
TORTURED HERE MORE -- YOU OR ME.
10
00:01:14,007 --> 00:01:15,709
>> WHAT DO YOU SAY WE TAKE A
11
00:01:15,709 --> 00:01:17,678
LITTLE BREAK?
12
00:01:17,678 --> 00:01:19,680
>> THAT'S -- NO. YOU KNOW?
13
00:01:19,680 --> 00:01:22,015
NO, BECAUSE THEY GOT TO HEAR THE
14
00:01:22,015 --> 00:01:22,850
SCREAMS.
15
00:01:22,850 --> 00:01:25,018
>> WELL, I CAN PRETEND!
16
00:01:25,018 --> 00:01:25,519
>> NO.
17
00:01:25,519 --> 00:01:26,354
>> I COULD DO THAT!
18
00:01:26,354 --> 00:01:27,455
>> THAT'S A REALLY NICE IDEA,
19
00:01:27,455 --> 00:01:27,788
THOUGH.
20
00:01:27,788 --> 00:01:28,756
>> I CAN CRACK THE WHIP.
21
00:01:28,756 --> 00:01:29,757
JUST PUT IT UP IN MY HAND,
22
00:01:29,757 --> 00:01:30,391
RIGHT HERE.
23
00:01:30,391 --> 00:01:31,592
YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH!
24
00:01:31,592 --> 00:01:32,360
PUT IT UP!
25
00:01:32,360 --> 00:01:33,794
I'M A MULTI-TASKER! PUT IT UP!
26
00:01:33,794 --> 00:01:34,462
>> OKAY.
27
00:01:34,462 --> 00:01:35,028
>> YEAH!
28
00:01:35,028 --> 00:01:36,029
>> ALL RIGHT.
29
00:01:36,029 --> 00:01:37,965
>> YEAH. YEAH, YEAH.
30
00:01:37,965 --> 00:01:40,033
LOOK. I'M CRACKING IT. SEE?
31
00:01:40,033 --> 00:01:40,868
I'M CRACKING IT!
32
00:01:40,868 --> 00:01:42,035
>> BUT YOU GOT TO SCREAM, TOO,
33
00:01:42,035 --> 00:01:42,870
WHILE YOU DO IT.
34
00:01:42,870 --> 00:01:44,472
>> OH, OKAY. AAH!
35
00:01:44,472 --> 00:01:45,639
>> THERE YOU GO. THAT'S GOOD.
36
00:01:45,639 --> 00:01:45,973
>> AAH!
37
00:01:45,973 --> 00:01:47,375
>> I LIKE THAT, BUT YOU GOT TO
38
00:01:47,375 --> 00:01:48,476
SYNC IT UP, BECAUSE IF YOU
39
00:01:48,476 --> 00:01:49,643
SCREAM BEFORE THE WHIP CRACK,
40
00:01:49,643 --> 00:01:50,578
IT'S GONNA RUIN THE EFFECT.
41
00:01:50,578 --> 00:01:50,978
>> OH, OKAY.
42
00:01:50,978 --> 00:01:51,945
>> THEY'RE GONNA KNOW WE'RE
43
00:01:51,945 --> 00:01:52,646
HOT-DOGGING THEM.
44
00:01:52,646 --> 00:01:54,582
>> [ SCREAMING ]
45
00:01:54,582 --> 00:01:55,816
>> [ CHUCKLES ]
46
00:01:55,816 --> 00:01:56,784
[ WINCES ]
47
00:01:56,784 --> 00:01:58,386
OH, I SERIOUSLY --
48
00:01:58,386 --> 00:02:00,488
[ GONG CRASHING ]
49
00:02:04,925 --> 00:02:07,127
SMOKE BREAK! YEAH!
50
00:02:18,005 --> 00:02:21,609
YOU'RE GETTING CLOSE, TOBY!
51
00:02:21,609 --> 00:02:22,443
[ LAUGHS ]
52
00:02:22,443 --> 00:02:23,911
YOU GUYS EVER THINK ABOUT
53
00:02:23,911 --> 00:02:24,745
QUITTING?!
54
00:02:24,745 --> 00:02:27,748
[ LAUGHS ]
55
00:02:27,748 --> 00:02:29,650
THOSE CRAZY GUYS.
56
00:02:29,650 --> 00:02:31,419
AH, HUNGRY!
57
00:02:31,419 --> 00:02:34,021
[ SIGHS ]
58
00:02:34,021 --> 00:02:36,089
ALL RIGHT. OOH.
59
00:02:36,089 --> 00:02:37,591
OH, IT'S GOT A WIGGLE TO IT
60
00:02:37,591 --> 00:02:40,661
TODAY!
61
00:02:40,661 --> 00:02:41,762
EXCUSE ME, SIR?
62
00:02:41,762 --> 00:02:42,496
>> YEAH?
63
00:02:42,496 --> 00:02:44,498
>> I CAN'T SEEM TO FIND MY BUNK.
64
00:02:44,498 --> 00:02:45,699
>> OH! NO, NO, NO.
65
00:02:45,699 --> 00:02:47,668
THEY GIVE YOU BED SHEETS TO GET
66
00:02:47,668 --> 00:02:49,370
YOU THINKI ABOUT SLEEP.
67
00:02:49,370 --> 00:02:50,638
BUT SLEEP -- IT, UH --
68
00:02:50,638 --> 00:02:53,541
[ Laughing ] IT NEVER COMES.
69
00:02:53,541 --> 00:02:54,775
HEY, I'M GARY!
70
00:02:54,775 --> 00:02:56,444
YOU MUST BE MY INTERN, CLAUDE,
71
00:02:56,444 --> 00:02:56,777
HUH?
72
00:02:56,777 --> 00:02:57,445
>> YEAH.
73
00:02:57,445 --> 00:02:58,946
>> GET YOUR SHIRT AND YOUR I.D.
74
00:02:58,946 --> 00:03:00,614
SO, HOW'S HELL TREATING YOU SO
75
00:03:00,614 --> 00:03:01,349
FAR, HUH?
76
00:03:01,349 --> 00:03:02,015
>> WELL, IT --
77
00:03:02,015 --> 00:03:02,950
[ BOTH GRUNT ]
78
00:03:02,950 --> 00:03:04,618
>> NOW, THIS I.D. IS GONNA GET
79
00:03:04,618 --> 00:03:06,787
YOU ACCESS TO...NOTHING.
80
00:03:06,787 --> 00:03:07,855
ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.
81
00:03:07,855 --> 00:03:08,789
IT DOESN'T WORK.
82
00:03:08,789 --> 00:03:10,491
>> THERE'S GOT TO BE A MISTAKE!
83
00:03:10,491 --> 00:03:11,892
I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO BE HERE!
84
00:03:11,892 --> 00:03:12,793
>> [ CHUCKLES ] YEAH.
85
00:03:12,793 --> 00:03:15,529
ALL THE NOOBS GET PWNED SAYING
86
00:03:15,529 --> 00:03:16,464
STUFF LIKE THAT.
87
00:03:16,464 --> 00:03:17,865
JUST LIKE THE CALENDAR SAYS.
88
00:03:17,865 --> 00:03:19,400
[ High-pitched ] "THERE'S A
89
00:03:19,400 --> 00:03:19,867
MISTAKE!
90
00:03:19,867 --> 00:03:21,469
I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO BE HERE!"
91
00:03:21,469 --> 00:03:22,002
[ LAUGHS ]
92
00:03:22,002 --> 00:03:23,637
[ Normal voice ] IT'S PRETTY
93
00:03:23,637 --> 00:03:23,971
GOOD.
94
00:03:23,971 --> 00:03:25,639
EVERY DAY? YOU CATCH THAT YET?
95
00:03:25,639 --> 00:03:26,807
>> THEY'RE ALL MONDAYS.
96
00:03:26,807 --> 00:03:28,476
>> MAN, THE GUYS WHO MADE THIS
97
00:03:28,476 --> 00:03:29,477
REALLY NAILED IT!
98
00:03:29,477 --> 00:03:30,143
[ LAUGHS ]
99
00:03:30,143 --> 00:03:31,812
>> IT'S -- IT'S CLEVER.
100
00:03:31,812 --> 00:03:32,813
IT I CLEVER.
101
00:03:32,813 --> 00:03:34,648
>> IT IS! IT'S REALLY GOOD!
102
00:03:34,648 --> 00:03:36,484
I LOVE IT!
103
00:03:36,484 --> 00:03:37,851
TALKS ABOUT LIFE, YOU KNOW --
104
00:03:37,851 --> 00:03:39,019
WHAT'S REALLY GOING ON.
105
00:03:39,019 --> 00:03:39,820
[ CHUCKLES ]
106
00:03:39,820 --> 00:03:40,988
LET ME SHOW YOU AROUND.
107
00:03:40,988 --> 00:03:41,922
[ GONG CRASHES ]
108
00:03:41,922 --> 00:03:42,990
OOH, BATHROOM BREAK.
109
00:03:42,990 --> 00:03:43,857
LET'S DO THIS!
110
00:03:43,857 --> 00:03:44,525
>> GOOD.
111
00:03:44,525 --> 00:03:45,859
I WAS GONNA ASK -- ARE THERE
112
00:03:45,859 --> 00:03:47,094
WATER FOUNTAINS?
113
00:03:47,094 --> 00:03:48,996
>> IT'S NOT A WATER FOUNTAIN.
114
00:03:48,996 --> 00:03:50,731
>> [ GAGGING ]
115
00:03:50,731 --> 00:03:52,766
THIS IS TERRIBLE.
116
00:03:52,766 --> 00:03:54,167
THIS IS HORRIBLE!
117
00:03:54,167 --> 00:03:55,736
>> JUST GOT TO CHILL OUT, BUDDY,
118
00:03:55,736 --> 00:03:56,404
ALL RIGHT?
119
00:03:56,404 --> 00:03:57,538
AT LEAST WE'RE NOT IN THE
120
00:03:57,538 --> 00:03:57,905
STALLS.
121
00:03:57,905 --> 00:03:59,840
THAT'S WHEN THINGS GET UGLY.
122
00:03:59,840 --> 00:04:00,941
[ FART ]
123
00:04:00,941 --> 00:04:02,410
BEEN THERE, DONE THAT, JASON.
124
00:04:02,410 --> 00:04:03,677
>> I CAN'T HACK IT HERE, MAN!
125
00:04:03,677 --> 00:04:04,945
>> THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO
126
00:04:04,945 --> 00:04:06,013
ABOUT IT, SO JUST BE A
127
00:04:06,013 --> 00:04:06,714
PROFESSIONAL.
128
00:04:06,714 --> 00:04:07,748
>> YEAH, I'M SICK OF IT!
129
00:04:07,748 --> 00:04:08,616
>> OH, IT'S SATAN!
130
00:04:08,616 --> 00:04:09,717
>> SICK OF IT, YOU HEAR ME?
131
00:04:09,717 --> 00:04:10,551
>> UH, PLAY DEAD.
132
00:04:10,551 --> 00:04:11,685
>> CRUZ KISSES HIS FIST AND
133
00:04:11,685 --> 00:04:12,920
POINTS TO HEAVEN EVERY FREAKING
134
00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:14,087
TIME HE GETS HIT BY A PITCH!
135
00:04:14,087 --> 00:04:15,022
I MEAN, WHAT IS THAT?
136
00:04:15,022 --> 00:04:16,424
YOU KNOW, I MEAN, I'M THE ONE
137
00:04:16,424 --> 00:04:17,458
THAT GIVES HIM ALL THOSE
138
00:04:17,458 --> 00:04:18,559
SEEING-EYE SINGLES, RIGHT?
139
00:04:18,559 --> 00:04:19,460
[ CELLPHONE BEEPS ]
140
00:04:19,460 --> 00:04:20,193
[ DEEP VOICE SPEAKS
141
00:04:20,193 --> 00:04:20,894
INDISTINCTLY ]
142
00:04:20,894 --> 00:04:22,630
>> HEY, SATAN.
143
00:04:26,567 --> 00:04:29,202
>> WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT?
144
00:04:29,202 --> 00:04:30,904
>> I'LL CATCH YOU LATER.
145
00:04:30,904 --> 00:04:31,905
[ CELLPHONE BEEPS ]
146
00:04:31,905 --> 00:04:32,706
>> [ LAUGHS ]
147
00:04:32,706 --> 00:04:33,941
BLOWING ANOTHER FIRST DAY!
148
00:04:33,941 --> 00:04:35,142
GOOD THING YOU'RE WEARING
149
00:04:35,142 --> 00:04:35,943
GLASSES, MAN.
150
00:04:35,943 --> 00:04:37,478
HERE IT COMES FOR YOU, BUDDY.
151
00:04:37,478 --> 00:04:37,911
>> GARY.
152
00:04:37,911 --> 00:04:38,479
>> NO!
153
00:04:38,479 --> 00:04:39,547
[ LIQUID SPLASHING ]
154
00:04:39,547 --> 00:04:40,448
>> YOU KNOW WHAT?
155
00:04:40,448 --> 00:04:41,214
>> OWW, IT'S HOT.
156
00:04:41,214 --> 00:04:42,650
>> DO THE GARGLE.
157
00:04:42,650 --> 00:04:43,551
DO THE GARGLE.
158
00:04:43,551 --> 00:04:44,552
>> [ GARGLING ]
159
00:04:44,552 --> 00:04:45,919
>> [ Chuckling ] THAT'S IT!
160
00:04:45,919 --> 00:04:47,455
>> WERE YOU TALKING ABOUT
161
00:04:47,455 --> 00:04:48,822
CORTEZ CRUZ, THE BASEBALL
162
00:04:48,822 --> 00:04:49,457
PLAYER?
163
00:04:49,457 --> 00:04:50,791
>> [ CONTINUES GARGLING ]
164
00:04:50,791 --> 00:04:51,925
>> WHO THE...ARE YOU?
165
00:04:51,925 --> 00:04:52,960
>> MY NAME'S CLAUDE.
166
00:04:52,960 --> 00:04:54,094
IT'S ALL FOR YOU, SATAN.
167
00:04:54,094 --> 00:04:55,463
>> THAT'S JUST MY INTERN!
168
00:04:55,463 --> 00:04:56,229
YOU CAN IGNORE HIM!
169
00:04:56,229 --> 00:04:57,731
>> I MEAN, CORTEZ CRUZ IS THE
170
00:04:57,731 --> 00:04:59,066
WORST -- ALWAYS KISSING THAT
171
00:04:59,066 --> 00:04:59,900
HUMONGOUS CROSS.
172
00:04:59,900 --> 00:05:00,801
WHAT'S THE POINT?
173
00:05:00,801 --> 00:05:02,102
HE GOT THE JESUS NECK TATTOO.
174
00:05:02,102 --> 00:05:02,836
AM I RIGHT?
175
00:05:02,836 --> 00:05:03,471
>> YEAH.
176
00:05:03,471 --> 00:05:04,672
YEAH, THAT'S A GOOD POINT.
177
00:05:04,672 --> 00:05:05,839
>> HE SHOULD BE KISSING A
178
00:05:05,839 --> 00:05:08,108
PENTAGRAM AND POINTING DOWN...
179
00:05:08,108 --> 00:05:08,742
TO YOU!
180
00:05:08,742 --> 00:05:10,010
[ SPLASHING STOPS ]
181
00:05:10,010 --> 00:05:12,245
>> YOU KNOW WHAT?
182
00:05:12,245 --> 00:05:13,681
THAT'S AN EXCELLENT IDEA.
183
00:05:13,681 --> 00:05:14,682
GARY, ARE YOU LISTENING TO THIS?
184
00:05:14,682 --> 00:05:15,849
>> UH, YOU'RE CUTTING IN AND
185
00:05:15,849 --> 00:05:16,116
OUT!
186
00:05:16,116 --> 00:05:17,485
I CAN'T -- I CAN'T HEAR YOU.
187
00:05:17,485 --> 00:05:18,018
>> UM, LISTEN.
188
00:05:18,018 --> 00:05:19,520
I GOT A JOB FOR YOU AND YOUR NEW
189
00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:20,253
INTERN, HERE, UM --
190
00:05:20,253 --> 00:05:20,854
>> CLAUDE.
191
00:05:20,854 --> 00:05:22,690
>> CLAUDE'S GONNA FILL YOU IN ON
192
00:05:22,690 --> 00:05:24,124
OUR NEW, UH, MARKETING PLAN FOR
193
00:05:24,124 --> 00:05:25,593
OUR FRIEND CORTEZ CRUZ.
194
00:05:25,593 --> 00:05:26,159
ALL RIGHT?
195
00:05:26,159 --> 00:05:28,862
>> [ GROANS, CHUCKLES ]
196
00:05:28,862 --> 00:05:30,764
>> YEP. GOOD MEETING YOU GUYS.
197
00:05:30,764 --> 00:05:33,934
>> OH, YEAH. MMM. OH, GOD.
198
00:05:33,934 --> 00:05:35,002
OH, GOD, YES. MMM.
199
00:05:35,002 --> 00:05:36,770
>> PRETTY DUMPY DIGS FOR A PRO
200
00:05:36,770 --> 00:05:37,605
BALL PLAYER.
201
00:05:37,605 --> 00:05:39,172
>> STOP TALKING SMACK ABOUT MY
202
00:05:39,172 --> 00:05:40,508
OLD APARTMENT, BRO.
203
00:05:40,508 --> 00:05:41,008
>> WHAT?
204
00:05:41,008 --> 00:05:42,810
WE'RE SUPPOSED TO BE TALKING TO
205
00:05:42,810 --> 00:05:43,677
CORTEZ CRUZ.
206
00:05:43,677 --> 00:05:45,112
>> SEE THAT GUY OVER THERE?
207
00:05:45,112 --> 00:05:46,880
THAT IS MY OLD ROOMIE, LUCAS,
208
00:05:46,880 --> 00:05:48,616
BACK FROM MY OLD EARTH DAYS.
209
00:05:48,616 --> 00:05:49,617
YOU CAN RELAX.
210
00:05:49,617 --> 00:05:51,118
WE CAN DO THIS ALL DAY LONG,
211
00:05:51,118 --> 00:05:52,620
'CAUSE HE CAN'T SEE US.
212
00:05:52,620 --> 00:05:54,221
>> I CAN SEE THE FLOATING BEER
213
00:05:54,221 --> 00:05:55,723
IN MY KITCHEN, THOUGH.
214
00:05:55,723 --> 00:05:57,224
>> OH, MAN.
215
00:05:57,224 --> 00:06:00,127
>> WELL, HE CAN'T HEAR US, SO
216
00:06:00,127 --> 00:06:01,529
BOO-YAH!
217
00:06:01,529 --> 00:06:02,730
HA! YOU DICK HEAD!
218
00:06:02,730 --> 00:06:03,964
YOU'RE A DICK HEAD!
219
00:06:03,964 --> 00:06:05,799
>> ACTUALLY, I CAN HEAR YOU,
220
00:06:05,799 --> 00:06:07,801
BECAUSE I JUST RESPONDED TO YOU,
221
00:06:07,801 --> 00:06:08,902
DICK HEAD!
222
00:06:08,902 --> 00:06:10,704
>> OH, HEY, LUCAS!
223
00:06:10,704 --> 00:06:12,706
WHAT'S UP?!
224
00:06:12,706 --> 00:06:14,074
I CAN SEE YOU MOVED MY FUTON
225
00:06:14,074 --> 00:06:15,175
INTO THE LIVING ROOM.
226
00:06:15,175 --> 00:06:16,844
>> I CONVERTED YOUR ROOM INTO A
227
00:06:16,844 --> 00:06:17,878
HUMIDOR.
228
00:06:17,878 --> 00:06:19,980
>> OH, THAT'S SO COOL!
229
00:06:19,980 --> 00:06:20,848
THAT'S SO COOL!
230
00:06:20,848 --> 00:06:22,315
I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE THAT! YEAH!
231
00:06:22,315 --> 00:06:23,817
>> SHUT THE DOOR BEHIND YOU.
232
00:06:23,817 --> 00:06:25,152
IT'S PERFECTLY HUMIDIFIED IN
233
00:06:25,152 --> 00:06:25,686
THERE!
234
00:06:25,686 --> 00:06:27,020
>> I GOT TO GO CHECK IT OUT.
235
00:06:27,020 --> 00:06:28,055
I'M GOING RIGHT NOW.
236
00:06:28,055 --> 00:06:30,558
JUST SLOWLY WORKING THROUGH YOUR
237
00:06:30,558 --> 00:06:32,092
HUMIDOR!
238
00:06:32,092 --> 00:06:33,160
BOOGETY-BOOGETY!
239
00:06:33,160 --> 00:06:34,762
[ PARTY HORN BLOWS ]
240
00:06:34,762 --> 00:06:35,996
>> [ SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY ON
241
00:06:35,996 --> 00:06:37,665
TV ]
242
00:06:37,665 --> 00:06:41,001
>> BOOGETY-BOOGETY.
243
00:06:41,001 --> 00:06:42,836
>> "I'M CLAUDE, AND I'M HERE TO
244
00:06:42,836 --> 00:06:44,738
DEVOUR YOUR SOUL."
245
00:06:44,738 --> 00:06:45,906
>> [ YELPS ]
246
00:06:45,906 --> 00:06:47,274
WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?!
247
00:06:47,274 --> 00:06:49,109
>> CLAUDE! I JUST SAID THAT.
248
00:06:49,109 --> 00:06:49,843
IT WORKS.
249
00:06:49,843 --> 00:06:51,344
>> CAN YOU SERIOUSLY NOT SEE ME,
250
00:06:51,344 --> 00:06:53,013
LUCAS, OR -- YOU'RE JERKING ME
251
00:06:53,013 --> 00:06:53,681
AROUND!
252
00:06:53,681 --> 00:06:55,082
>> IT SAYS IN THE MANUAL THAT
253
00:06:55,082 --> 00:06:56,617
YOU HAVE TO SEE IT IN YOUR
254
00:06:56,617 --> 00:06:57,184
MIND'S EYE.
255
00:06:57,184 --> 00:06:58,852
>> I'M DOING THAT, ALL RIGHT?
256
00:06:58,852 --> 00:07:00,854
I GUESS MY CLOAK MODE MUST BE
257
00:07:00,854 --> 00:07:01,354
STUCK ON.
258
00:07:01,354 --> 00:07:03,023
SOMETIMES IT GETS STUCK WHEN
259
00:07:03,023 --> 00:07:05,693
I'M DOING HIGH-PROFILE...
260
00:07:05,693 --> 00:07:07,795
>> ALL RIGHT. CHECK THIS OUT.
261
00:07:10,097 --> 00:07:11,732
[ As old woman ] LUCAS...
262
00:07:11,732 --> 00:07:13,366
CAN YOU GIVE US DIRECTIONS TO
263
00:07:13,366 --> 00:07:16,036
THE BASEBALL STADIUM?
264
00:07:16,036 --> 00:07:17,237
>> NANA?
265
00:07:17,237 --> 00:07:18,806
B-- BUT YOU'RE DEAD!
266
00:07:18,806 --> 00:07:20,874
>> [ Deep voice ] WHERE IS THE
267
00:07:20,874 --> 00:07:22,242
STADIUM?!
268
00:07:22,242 --> 00:07:23,777
>> IT'S OFF THE INTERSTATE!
269
00:07:23,777 --> 00:07:25,212
TAKE ROUTE 17, GO DOWN ABOUT
270
00:07:25,212 --> 00:07:28,048
4 BLOCKS, AND MAKE A RIGHT!
271
00:07:28,048 --> 00:07:29,382
>> HEY, POP QUIZ.
272
00:07:29,382 --> 00:07:30,884
HOW DID YOU DO THAT THING -- YOU
273
00:07:30,884 --> 00:07:33,120
KNOW, THAT OLD-LADY THING?
274
00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:34,755
I-I MEAN, I KNOW HOW YOU DID IT,
275
00:07:34,755 --> 00:07:36,056
BUT CAN YOU EXPLAIN TO ME HOW
276
00:07:36,056 --> 00:07:36,724
YOU DID IT?
277
00:07:36,724 --> 00:07:37,324
>> IT'S EASY.
278
00:07:37,324 --> 00:07:38,726
YOU JUST GRAB AN ARTICLE OF
279
00:07:38,726 --> 00:07:40,060
CLOTHING FROM THAT PERSON, AND
280
00:07:40,060 --> 00:07:41,128
YOU CAN APPEAR AS THEM.
281
00:07:41,128 --> 00:07:42,095
>> OH, I KNEW THAT.
282
00:07:42,095 --> 00:07:43,396
I WAS TESTING YOU, AND YOU GOT
283
00:07:43,396 --> 00:07:44,131
AN A-PLUS.
284
00:07:44,131 --> 00:07:45,733
>> WHY DON'T YOU GIVE IT A SHOT?
285
00:07:45,733 --> 00:07:46,266
>> ALL RIGHT.
286
00:07:46,266 --> 00:07:47,768
YEAH, YOU WANT TO SEE WHAT THE
287
00:07:47,768 --> 00:07:48,335
EXPERT DOES?
288
00:07:48,335 --> 00:07:49,236
SURE THING, BUDDY.
289
00:07:49,236 --> 00:07:50,337
I'LL GIVE YOU A THRILL.
290
00:07:50,337 --> 00:07:52,305
>> GREAT.
291
00:07:52,305 --> 00:07:54,908
>> CLAUDE! CLAUDE, WHAT AM I?
292
00:07:54,908 --> 00:07:56,076
WHO AM I?
293
00:07:56,076 --> 00:07:56,910
AM I HANDSOME?
294
00:07:56,910 --> 00:07:58,078
AM I SOMEBODY REALLY COOL?
295
00:07:58,078 --> 00:07:58,746
WHO AM --
296
00:07:58,746 --> 00:07:59,412
>> HOLD ON, HOLD ON.
297
00:07:59,412 --> 00:08:00,347
YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED BACK HERE,
298
00:08:00,347 --> 00:08:01,014
SIR.
299
00:08:01,014 --> 00:08:02,082
>> NO, NO, HANG ON, MAN.
300
00:08:02,082 --> 00:08:02,783
I'M WITH HIM!
301
00:08:02,783 --> 00:08:03,150
>> WHO?
302
00:08:03,150 --> 00:08:04,184
>> YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!
303
00:08:04,184 --> 00:08:05,285
I -- HEY, CLAUDE! WAIT UP!
304
00:08:05,285 --> 00:08:06,319
>> WHO THE HELL YOU TALKING
305
00:08:06,319 --> 00:08:06,820
ABOUT?
306
00:08:06,820 --> 00:08:07,921
>> THAT THERE RED GUY IN THE
307
00:08:07,921 --> 00:08:08,255
GLASSES!
308
00:08:08,255 --> 00:08:09,289
I GOT TO GET IN THERE, MAN!
309
00:08:09,289 --> 00:08:10,123
WHOA!
310
00:08:10,123 --> 00:08:11,191
OH, HEY, MAN!
311
00:08:11,191 --> 00:08:11,859
NO!
312
00:08:11,859 --> 00:08:13,160
[ SCREAMING ]
313
00:08:13,160 --> 00:08:14,762
GOD! OWW!
314
00:08:14,762 --> 00:08:16,864
[ MUSIC PLAYING ]
315
00:08:22,369 --> 00:08:23,436
>> HOLA CORTEZ.
316
00:08:23,436 --> 00:08:25,773
>> [ GASPS ] iDios mío!
317
00:08:29,009 --> 00:08:32,012
[ YELPS ]
318
00:08:32,012 --> 00:08:34,181
AAH!
319
00:08:37,851 --> 00:08:39,352
[ SIGHS ]
320
00:08:39,352 --> 00:08:41,855
>> NICE INK, CORTEZ.
321
00:08:42,189 --> 00:08:43,691
DID YOU FORGET WHO PULLED YOU
322
00:08:43,691 --> 00:08:44,992
OUT OF THE SLUMS OF VENEZUELA
323
00:08:44,992 --> 00:08:46,226
AND MADE THIS ALL POSSIBLE?
324
00:08:46,226 --> 00:08:48,962
>> [ SPEAKING SPANISH ]
325
00:08:48,962 --> 00:08:50,463
>> HOW ABOUT YOU STOP USING
326
00:08:50,463 --> 00:08:51,965
JESUS AS A BEARD?
327
00:08:53,834 --> 00:08:55,368
HERE.
328
00:08:55,368 --> 00:08:57,204
EVERY TIME YOU GET ON BASE, WE
329
00:08:57,204 --> 00:08:59,139
WANT YOU TO KISS THIS AND THANK
330
00:08:59,139 --> 00:09:00,708
THE MAN THAT MADE IT ALL
331
00:09:00,708 --> 00:09:01,308
POSSIBLE.
332
00:09:01,308 --> 00:09:02,910
>> ¿UN ESTRELLA DE DAVID?
333
00:09:02,910 --> 00:09:04,311
>> IT'S A PENTAGRAM, YOU
334
00:09:04,311 --> 00:09:05,045
WETBACK.
335
00:09:05,045 --> 00:09:06,814
>> CLAUDE, WHERE ARE YOU AT,
336
00:09:06,814 --> 00:09:07,180
MAN?
337
00:09:07,180 --> 00:09:09,149
HEY, NOW, WHAT'D HE SAY?
338
00:09:09,149 --> 00:09:10,317
>> OKAY. OKAY, OKAY, OKAY.
339
00:09:10,317 --> 00:09:12,019
ESTá BIEN.
340
00:09:12,019 --> 00:09:14,154
LO HARé.
341
00:09:16,890 --> 00:09:18,158
>> HOW ABOUT I JUST DISSOLVE
342
00:09:18,158 --> 00:09:19,492
YOUR FACE IN ACID RIGHT NOW?!
343
00:09:19,492 --> 00:09:20,761
>> WHOA, CLAUDE! WHOA.
344
00:09:20,761 --> 00:09:22,329
GOING A BIT BAD COP, HERE.
345
00:09:22,329 --> 00:09:23,831
[ CHUCKLES ]
346
00:09:23,831 --> 00:09:25,098
LOOK, WE'RE AUTHORIZED TO GIVE
347
00:09:25,098 --> 00:09:25,999
HIM THOSE POWERS.
348
00:09:25,999 --> 00:09:27,367
>> YOU GIVE HIM THIS, HE'LL JUST
349
00:09:27,367 --> 00:09:28,068
WANT MORE.
350
00:09:28,068 --> 00:09:29,436
>> YOU NEED TO BACK OFF ON THIS,
351
00:09:29,436 --> 00:09:30,103
ALL RIGHT?
352
00:09:30,103 --> 00:09:31,238
I'M THE BOSS HERE.
353
00:09:31,238 --> 00:09:32,840
THANKS FOR YOUR ENERGY.
354
00:09:32,840 --> 00:09:33,373
>> YEAH.
355
00:09:33,373 --> 00:09:35,175
>> LOOK. ALL RIGHT?
356
00:09:35,175 --> 00:09:36,343
I'M GONNA USE A SPELL.
357
00:09:36,343 --> 00:09:38,011
I'M GONNA BUMP UP YOUR HAND-EYE
358
00:09:38,011 --> 00:09:39,179
COORDINATION, BUT YOU
359
00:09:39,179 --> 00:09:40,347
REMEMBER -- YOU DO THE
360
00:09:40,347 --> 00:09:41,849
EL DIABLO, POINT-O DOWN-O,
361
00:09:41,849 --> 00:09:42,850
SMOOCHY, SMOOCHY.
362
00:09:42,850 --> 00:09:44,051
>> [ SPEAKING SPANISH ]
363
00:09:44,051 --> 00:09:45,352
>> I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT
364
00:09:45,352 --> 00:09:46,754
YOU'RE SAYING.
365
00:09:46,754 --> 00:09:49,189
SO...OKAY.
366
00:09:49,189 --> 00:09:51,024
[ CHANTING ]
367
00:09:57,931 --> 00:09:59,299
NOW, CORTEZ, I THINK THAT LAST
368
00:09:59,299 --> 00:10:00,868
BIT THERE WILL TINGLE LIKE --
369
00:10:00,868 --> 00:10:01,434
>> [ GASPS ]
370
00:10:01,434 --> 00:10:02,535
WHAT DID YOU JUST DO?!
371
00:10:02,535 --> 00:10:03,370
>> [ YELPING ]
372
00:10:03,370 --> 00:10:04,772
I THINK I DID IT...WRONG.
373
00:10:04,772 --> 00:10:05,372
>> WATCH OUT!
374
00:10:05,372 --> 00:10:06,539
YOU'RE STEPPING ON HIM!
375
00:10:06,539 --> 00:10:07,875
GET A CUP OR SOMETHING!
376
00:10:07,875 --> 00:10:08,976
>> DUDE, IT'S A ROACH!
377
00:10:08,976 --> 00:10:10,878
>> NO, THAT'S HIM! STOP!
378
00:10:10,878 --> 00:10:14,047
WE'RE GONNA REFORM HIM, RIGHT?
379
00:10:14,047 --> 00:10:15,883
RIGHT?
380
00:10:16,216 --> 00:10:17,951
>> THE REAL MYSTERY TODAY IS
381
00:10:17,951 --> 00:10:19,419
WHAT HAPPENED TO PERENNIAL
382
00:10:19,419 --> 00:10:21,922
ALL-STAR CORTEZ CRUZ.
383
00:10:21,922 --> 00:10:23,223
CORTEZ, FORGIVE ME FOR SAYING
384
00:10:23,223 --> 00:10:24,892
SO, BUT YOU LOOKED A LITTLE LOST
385
00:10:24,892 --> 00:10:25,993
OUT THERE AT THE PLATE.
386
00:10:25,993 --> 00:10:27,394
>> 'CAUSE HE SWUNG THE BAT LIKE
387
00:10:27,394 --> 00:10:28,228
A...GIRL.
388
00:10:28,228 --> 00:10:29,830
>> I WAS HAVING A LITTLE TROUBLE
389
00:10:29,830 --> 00:10:31,264
GETTING AROUND ON HIS FAST BALL.
390
00:10:31,264 --> 00:10:32,465
BUT, UH, ALSO, UH, DEAREST
391
00:10:32,465 --> 00:10:33,967
SATAN, I PRAY THAT THE EARTH
392
00:10:33,967 --> 00:10:35,235
WILL CRACK OPEN AND YOU WILL
393
00:10:35,235 --> 00:10:36,837
REIGN OVER MAN FOR 1,000 YEARS.
394
00:10:36,837 --> 00:10:37,938
HEY, MIRA, SATAN. MWAH.
395
00:10:37,938 --> 00:10:39,272
IT'S ALL FOR YOU, BABY, OKAY?
396
00:10:39,272 --> 00:10:40,841
>> WHAT A...WEIRD THING TO SAY.
397
00:10:40,841 --> 00:10:41,441
>> CREAM PIE!
398
00:10:41,441 --> 00:10:42,275
>> [ SCREAMS ]
399
00:10:42,275 --> 00:10:43,510
OH, GOD. OH, GOD! OH, GOD!
400
00:10:43,510 --> 00:10:45,012
>> WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!
401
00:10:45,012 --> 00:10:46,246
YOU'RE GONNA EXPOSE THE WHOLE
402
00:10:46,246 --> 00:10:46,847
OPERATION!
403
00:10:46,847 --> 00:10:47,180
>> NO!
404
00:10:47,180 --> 00:10:48,281
>> WHAT BASEBALL GUYS DO!
405
00:10:48,281 --> 00:10:48,949
HAIL SATAN!
406
00:10:48,949 --> 00:10:50,117
>> DUDE, SATAN, IT WASN'T MY
407
00:10:50,117 --> 00:10:50,450
FAULT!
408
00:10:50,450 --> 00:10:51,484
IT'S GARY! LOOK AT HIM!
409
00:10:51,484 --> 00:10:52,419
HE'S A FAT IDIOT!
410
00:10:52,419 --> 00:10:53,253
>> [ SHRIEKS ]
411
00:10:53,253 --> 00:10:54,454
>> I JUST WANT TO SAY HAIL
412
00:10:54,454 --> 00:10:55,422
SATAN, EVERYBODY.
413
00:10:55,422 --> 00:10:56,924
I HOPE EVERYBODY'S DOING GOOD,
414
00:10:56,924 --> 00:10:57,958
AND MERRY CHRISTMAS!
415
00:10:57,958 --> 00:11:00,193
[ CACKLES ]
416
00:11:00,193 --> 00:11:01,428
>> THEY DO THE CREAM PIE WHEN
417
00:11:01,428 --> 00:11:03,096
THEY WIN, GARY.
418
00:11:03,096 --> 00:11:04,364
DON'T YOU WATCH SPORTS?
419
00:11:04,364 --> 00:11:06,099
>> YOU THINK YOU'RE GONNA BE A
420
00:11:06,099 --> 00:11:06,466
WHILE?
421
00:11:06,499 --> 00:11:08,268
'CAUSE I COULD GO GET YOU SOME
422
00:11:08,268 --> 00:11:09,269
MAGAZINES, OR --
423
00:11:09,269 --> 00:11:11,271
>> OH, NO, I'M GOOD.
424
00:11:11,271 --> 00:11:13,373
JUST SIT TIGHT IN THE BOWL, HUH?
425
00:11:13,373 --> 00:11:15,208
>> * I'VE BEEN ROTTEN,
426
00:11:15,208 --> 00:11:17,610
I'VE BEEN LEFT OUT BEFORE *
427
00:11:17,610 --> 00:11:20,180
* I'VE BEEN SHUT OUT, HAD MY
428
00:11:20,180 --> 00:11:22,883
FINGERS SLAMMED IN THE DOOR *
429
00:11:22,883 --> 00:11:25,152
* AND I'VE BEEN COLD,
430
00:11:25,152 --> 00:11:27,554
AND I FEEL OLD *
431
00:11:27,554 --> 00:11:29,622
* AND I FELT YOU LOOKING DOWN,
432
00:11:29,622 --> 00:11:31,959
AND I KNOW THINGS ARE LOOKING
433
00:11:31,959 --> 00:11:34,061
UP *
26055
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
