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1
00:00:01,102 --> 00:00:02,670
I don't get
what your problem is.
2
00:00:02,703 --> 00:00:04,338
Mom, you're not serious,
are you?
3
00:00:04,372 --> 00:00:06,507
Mom, you still have to
take me to Chloe's house
on Saturday.
4
00:00:06,540 --> 00:00:08,142
Mom, this is
child abandonment.
5
00:00:08,176 --> 00:00:10,678
We're like orphans now!
(door slams)
6
00:00:13,013 --> 00:00:16,284
FXX presents You're the Worst.
7
00:00:26,127 --> 00:00:28,396
Everything bagel
and cream cheese, black coffee.
8
00:00:30,631 --> 00:00:34,368
* Are you my love?
Hey.
9
00:00:34,402 --> 00:00:36,570
* Are you my love?
10
00:00:36,604 --> 00:00:39,707
* Are you the one
that I've been thinking of? *
11
00:00:39,740 --> 00:00:42,343
* Are you my love?
12
00:00:42,376 --> 00:00:45,413
* I've been holding the door
13
00:00:45,446 --> 00:00:47,948
* I've been holding
the door *
14
00:00:47,981 --> 00:00:51,419
* Are you the one
that I've been waiting for? *
15
00:00:51,452 --> 00:00:54,388
* I've been holding the door
16
00:00:54,422 --> 00:00:56,390
* Lightning struck
17
00:00:56,424 --> 00:01:00,060
* Electricity rained
18
00:01:00,094 --> 00:01:02,062
* How my lips stung
19
00:01:02,096 --> 00:01:05,699
* Whispering your name
20
00:01:05,733 --> 00:01:11,872
* Tell me, baby, true
21
00:01:11,905 --> 00:01:14,108
* I've been holding the door
22
00:01:14,142 --> 00:01:15,776
* I've been holding
the door *
23
00:01:15,809 --> 00:01:17,411
Aw, hey, dog.
24
00:01:17,445 --> 00:01:20,648
* Are you the one that
I've been waiting for? *
25
00:01:20,681 --> 00:01:24,051
* I've been holding the door
26
00:01:24,084 --> 00:01:25,586
* Are you my love?
27
00:01:25,619 --> 00:01:29,223
* Are you my love?
Bup!
28
00:01:29,257 --> 00:01:32,092
* Are you the one
that I've been dreaming of? *
29
00:01:32,126 --> 00:01:35,329
* Are you my love?
30
00:01:35,363 --> 00:01:38,599
(coughing)
Jesus.
31
00:01:38,632 --> 00:01:40,634
(Г la Dolores O'Riordan):
* With their tanks
32
00:01:40,668 --> 00:01:42,436
* And their bombs,
and their bombs *
33
00:01:42,470 --> 00:01:44,505
* And their guns, in your head
34
00:01:44,538 --> 00:01:47,475
* In your head you're crying
35
00:01:47,508 --> 00:01:51,345
* In their head,
in your head *
36
00:01:51,379 --> 00:01:53,414
* Zombie, zombie
37
00:01:53,447 --> 00:01:56,284
* Zombie-ie-ie-ie.
38
00:01:56,317 --> 00:02:00,120
Linds, I discovered this
awesome radio station!
39
00:02:00,154 --> 00:02:03,157
Jack FM-- it is not your
father's rock station.
40
00:02:03,191 --> 00:02:06,360
You see, Jack just plays
whatever he wants.
41
00:02:06,394 --> 00:02:08,596
They have this great '90s block
42
00:02:08,629 --> 00:02:10,664
I've gotten really into.
43
00:02:10,698 --> 00:02:13,667
What a great decade for music.
44
00:02:13,701 --> 00:02:17,271
We were so lucky!
45
00:02:17,305 --> 00:02:19,006
(toilet flushes)
Anyway...
46
00:02:19,039 --> 00:02:20,508
How was your day?
47
00:02:20,541 --> 00:02:21,609
So good.
48
00:02:21,642 --> 00:02:23,277
I love my job.
49
00:02:23,311 --> 00:02:25,045
That's so great.
50
00:02:25,078 --> 00:02:26,947
Watch me.
51
00:02:26,980 --> 00:02:29,383
It's like having people
expect you to be somewhere
52
00:02:29,417 --> 00:02:31,619
actually makes you
want to go there.
53
00:02:31,652 --> 00:02:33,354
Plus, I get money.
54
00:02:33,387 --> 00:02:34,822
Awesome.
55
00:02:34,855 --> 00:02:38,892
Look, I put beads
in my hair.
Hmm.
56
00:02:38,926 --> 00:02:40,861
You should use it at work.
57
00:02:40,894 --> 00:02:42,296
"Teenage white girl
on vacation"
58
00:02:42,330 --> 00:02:43,797
is gonna be huge this year.
59
00:02:43,831 --> 00:02:47,000
I'm finally contributing
to society.
60
00:02:47,034 --> 00:02:48,836
By being a stylist's assistant?
61
00:02:48,869 --> 00:02:50,671
Helping make people
less ugly?
62
00:02:50,704 --> 00:02:53,674
It's God's work, Gretch.
63
00:02:53,707 --> 00:02:55,042
This is the tits!
64
00:02:55,075 --> 00:02:57,478
I'm playing with clothes
during the day, and then
65
00:02:57,511 --> 00:03:00,214
I come home, and you're
here, and Paul isn't.
66
00:03:00,248 --> 00:03:03,150
I love my new life.
67
00:03:03,183 --> 00:03:07,421
Yeah, but... I don't know.
68
00:03:07,455 --> 00:03:10,157
What?
I love it, too.
69
00:03:10,190 --> 00:03:13,327
But... we're doing
the same thing every night.
70
00:03:13,361 --> 00:03:15,596
You know, drinking,
smoking weed.
71
00:03:15,629 --> 00:03:18,031
I'm afraid we might
be in a rut.
72
00:03:18,065 --> 00:03:22,370
Okay, well, we can
go out in the hood.
73
00:03:22,403 --> 00:03:24,171
Get Korean barbecue,
and then go to one
74
00:03:24,204 --> 00:03:27,040
of those karaoke places where
they don't like white people.
75
00:03:27,074 --> 00:03:28,509
I have a better idea.
76
00:03:28,542 --> 00:03:29,943
Why don't we stay here
and smoke crack?
77
00:03:31,645 --> 00:03:34,181
Where did you get crack?
78
00:03:34,214 --> 00:03:35,949
From one of the
homeless people outside.
79
00:03:35,983 --> 00:03:37,685
I didn't even have
to leave the apartment.
80
00:03:37,718 --> 00:03:38,886
He just came to the window
and asked
81
00:03:38,919 --> 00:03:41,188
if I wanted to buy some crack,
and I said yes!
82
00:03:41,221 --> 00:03:43,891
Ten dollars for all that crack.
Can you believe it?
83
00:03:43,924 --> 00:03:46,794
Maybe smoking crack
isn't the best idea.
84
00:03:46,827 --> 00:03:49,763
The guy who sold it to me
couldn't disagree more.
85
00:03:56,837 --> 00:03:58,839
*
86
00:04:01,775 --> 00:04:04,578
* I'm gonna leave you anyway
87
00:04:04,612 --> 00:04:07,315
* I'm gonna leave you
anyway *
88
00:04:07,348 --> 00:04:10,651
* Gonna leave you anyway.
89
00:04:15,489 --> 00:04:17,625
WOMAN: Lindsay, did you get
those swatches from Antwerp?
90
00:04:17,658 --> 00:04:21,395
Hello?
Lindsay?
91
00:04:21,429 --> 00:04:24,998
Can I see you
in my office?
92
00:04:27,935 --> 00:04:29,269
Lindsay, I wanted to...
93
00:04:29,303 --> 00:04:30,804
I smoked crack.
What?
94
00:04:32,773 --> 00:04:34,675
Thank you for
this opportunity.
95
00:04:34,708 --> 00:04:36,243
I'm sorry
I let you down.
96
00:04:36,276 --> 00:04:37,445
Lindsay, sit.
97
00:04:37,478 --> 00:04:40,581
You've been here
on a trial basis
98
00:04:40,614 --> 00:04:42,983
for over a month now.
99
00:04:43,016 --> 00:04:44,685
Are you enjoying yourself?
100
00:04:44,718 --> 00:04:46,754
So much.
101
00:04:46,787 --> 00:04:49,256
It's the dream
I didn't know I had.
102
00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:51,359
I feel like I found
a family here.
103
00:04:51,392 --> 00:04:53,293
Plus, the free food
is a nice perk.
104
00:04:53,327 --> 00:04:54,628
We don't have free food.
105
00:04:54,662 --> 00:04:56,997
Anyway, how would you like
to come work
106
00:04:57,030 --> 00:04:58,265
for me full-time?
107
00:04:58,298 --> 00:05:01,535
What?! Yes!
108
00:05:01,569 --> 00:05:04,271
I mean, I might be
amenable to that.
109
00:05:04,304 --> 00:05:06,874
Do you have a piece of paper
on which I should write
110
00:05:06,907 --> 00:05:08,542
my opening salary offer?
111
00:05:08,576 --> 00:05:11,178
(laughs)
112
00:05:11,211 --> 00:05:12,513
You're funny.
113
00:05:12,546 --> 00:05:14,147
You have got
a great eye,
114
00:05:14,181 --> 00:05:17,217
and you're the most
positive person we've ever had.
115
00:05:17,250 --> 00:05:19,587
I really value you,
Lindsay.
116
00:05:21,021 --> 00:05:24,291
Okay, well, you'll start
at a base of $45K,
117
00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:26,727
plus commission
on any new clients
118
00:05:26,760 --> 00:05:28,696
you bring in.
119
00:05:28,729 --> 00:05:30,698
Now that you're out of
your probationary period,
120
00:05:30,731 --> 00:05:32,366
the real work begins.
121
00:05:32,400 --> 00:05:34,568
You don't have to do any more
of those dummy chores.
122
00:05:34,602 --> 00:05:36,269
Carl can do all that crap.
123
00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:43,544
I want you to start thinking
like a designer.
124
00:05:43,577 --> 00:05:45,312
Read these.
125
00:05:45,345 --> 00:05:46,880
They're a good start
for understanding
126
00:05:46,914 --> 00:05:49,550
my style, philosophy
and influences,
127
00:05:49,583 --> 00:05:53,020
and probably the origins
of my body dysmorphia.
128
00:05:53,053 --> 00:05:55,088
Why I eat ice for lunch.
129
00:05:55,122 --> 00:05:57,057
(nervous laugh)
130
00:05:57,090 --> 00:06:00,093
Then come back tonight
at 7:00, and we begin.
131
00:06:00,127 --> 00:06:01,529
Tonight?
132
00:06:01,562 --> 00:06:04,865
But... work is for day.
133
00:06:04,898 --> 00:06:07,401
Honey, making people look good
134
00:06:07,435 --> 00:06:09,236
is a 24-hour job.
135
00:06:09,269 --> 00:06:13,373
We have to dress an actor for
Jaden Smith's retirement party.
136
00:06:14,608 --> 00:06:16,577
Sorry.
137
00:06:16,610 --> 00:06:17,945
Thanks, Priscilla.
138
00:06:17,978 --> 00:06:20,047
(Lindsay sighs)
139
00:06:29,256 --> 00:06:31,291
Shove it up your ass, Carl.
140
00:06:32,893 --> 00:06:33,927
Okay.
141
00:06:40,634 --> 00:06:41,735
Hi. Hi.
Hello.
142
00:06:41,769 --> 00:06:43,571
How was work?
I had a great day.
143
00:06:43,604 --> 00:06:46,540
The Price Is Right had Plinko,
which they never do.
144
00:06:46,574 --> 00:06:49,109
I made a chocolate
mug cake.
145
00:06:49,142 --> 00:06:53,413
Also, I started a really cool
dinosaur mural on your wall.
146
00:06:55,115 --> 00:06:56,550
Anyway,
147
00:06:56,584 --> 00:06:59,286
tonight I made a pitcher
of greyhounds
148
00:06:59,319 --> 00:07:01,889
with that bag of grapefruits
that you thought were limes.
149
00:07:01,922 --> 00:07:04,291
Postmates is bringing us
Taco Bell as we speak.
150
00:07:04,324 --> 00:07:05,593
I think I have
a little crack left.
151
00:07:05,626 --> 00:07:06,594
(laughs)
152
00:07:06,627 --> 00:07:07,761
I can't hang out tonight.
153
00:07:07,795 --> 00:07:09,797
I have to be back
at work at 7:00.
154
00:07:09,830 --> 00:07:11,264
But work is for day.
155
00:07:11,298 --> 00:07:12,933
That's what I said.
156
00:07:12,966 --> 00:07:14,502
Oh, well, at least until then,
157
00:07:14,535 --> 00:07:15,836
we can get down
with our chalupas
158
00:07:15,869 --> 00:07:16,904
and watch Fixer Upper.
159
00:07:16,937 --> 00:07:18,238
We drink every time Joanna says,
160
00:07:18,271 --> 00:07:20,674
"Shiplap!" That Chip
can get it, huh?
161
00:07:20,708 --> 00:07:23,176
He can get it
all the way, I think.
162
00:07:23,210 --> 00:07:25,178
Actually, I have a whole bunch
of reading to do.
163
00:07:25,212 --> 00:07:26,413
Oh, ha-ha.
"I should really
164
00:07:26,446 --> 00:07:27,681
"get started on those sit-ups
165
00:07:27,715 --> 00:07:29,783
if I want to finish in time
to catch the news."
166
00:07:29,817 --> 00:07:31,451
Actually, I really need
to concentrate,
167
00:07:31,485 --> 00:07:34,287
so maybe you could clear out
for, like, an hour or two?
168
00:07:39,627 --> 00:07:41,194
Are you okay?
169
00:07:41,228 --> 00:07:43,030
Yeah, no, it's just, um,
170
00:07:43,063 --> 00:07:46,199
I'm not really going
outside these days.
171
00:07:46,233 --> 00:07:47,200
What do you mean?
172
00:07:47,234 --> 00:07:49,336
I haven't left your apartment.
173
00:07:49,369 --> 00:07:51,438
Since when?
Um...
174
00:07:51,471 --> 00:07:54,207
three months, two days,
give or take.
175
00:07:54,241 --> 00:07:55,709
What?!
176
00:07:55,743 --> 00:07:57,945
You mean you haven't even left
while I'm at work?
177
00:07:57,978 --> 00:07:59,847
But the other day
I came home for lunch
178
00:07:59,880 --> 00:08:02,215
and jerked it for 45 minutes.
179
00:08:02,249 --> 00:08:05,052
I was hiding under the bed.
180
00:08:05,085 --> 00:08:06,820
Oh.
181
00:08:06,854 --> 00:08:08,522
Oh...
182
00:08:08,556 --> 00:08:11,058
So, I take it you're not
183
00:08:11,091 --> 00:08:12,059
going to therapy?
184
00:08:12,092 --> 00:08:13,393
Wrong!
185
00:08:13,426 --> 00:08:15,062
I Skype with that
titty-sucking bitch
186
00:08:15,095 --> 00:08:16,564
every week.
187
00:08:16,597 --> 00:08:19,667
I am still taking my meds and
188
00:08:19,700 --> 00:08:22,335
holding down my job,
so she's happy.
189
00:08:22,369 --> 00:08:23,537
Dummy.
190
00:08:23,571 --> 00:08:24,972
Are you holding down
your job?
191
00:08:25,005 --> 00:08:27,374
I'm paying randos
to take care
192
00:08:27,407 --> 00:08:30,043
of my bullshit clients, and I
told the boys I'm in Europe
193
00:08:30,077 --> 00:08:31,311
scouting new talent and
194
00:08:31,344 --> 00:08:33,981
making connect...
Shit, shit!
195
00:08:34,014 --> 00:08:36,449
I'm late for my
Skype with them.
196
00:08:39,553 --> 00:08:41,254
Oh.
197
00:08:42,723 --> 00:08:44,424
Oh, bonjour.
198
00:08:44,457 --> 00:08:46,226
Oh, you're in France now.
199
00:08:46,259 --> 00:08:47,695
God, I love Paris.
200
00:08:47,728 --> 00:08:48,829
Did you go to the Louvre?
201
00:08:48,862 --> 00:08:49,863
Oh, no, it's closed.
202
00:08:49,897 --> 00:08:51,498
They're cleaning the rugs.
203
00:08:51,531 --> 00:08:52,833
Uh, where's Honey Nutz?
204
00:08:52,866 --> 00:08:53,934
He couldn't make it.
205
00:08:53,967 --> 00:08:55,368
He said he had a colonoscopy.
206
00:08:55,402 --> 00:08:56,369
Isn't he young for that?
207
00:08:56,403 --> 00:08:57,605
Well, he said it's never
208
00:08:57,638 --> 00:08:58,772
too early to start,
but come on,
209
00:08:58,806 --> 00:09:00,173
we all know the truth, right?
210
00:09:00,207 --> 00:09:02,342
Zachary craves any kind
of human touch.
211
00:09:02,375 --> 00:09:04,444
Anyway, bitch,
what opportunities
212
00:09:04,477 --> 00:09:05,846
have you gotten for us?
213
00:09:05,879 --> 00:09:07,347
You've been gone forever.
214
00:09:07,380 --> 00:09:09,016
I am laying
important groundwork.
215
00:09:09,049 --> 00:09:11,184
I'm talking you up
to all the music press,
216
00:09:11,218 --> 00:09:12,786
the influential bloggers.
217
00:09:12,820 --> 00:09:15,055
Uh, pardonnez-moi,
uh,ashtray,
218
00:09:15,088 --> 00:09:16,089
s'il vous plaГ®t.
219
00:09:16,123 --> 00:09:17,090
Merci.
220
00:09:17,124 --> 00:09:18,458
It's just that you've been gone
221
00:09:18,491 --> 00:09:20,360
for a long time, and we actually
have press needs here.
222
00:09:20,393 --> 00:09:22,362
I tweet-threatened
Connie Chung yesterday,
223
00:09:22,395 --> 00:09:24,798
and not a peep, Gretchen,
not one peep.
224
00:09:24,832 --> 00:09:27,768
Guys, there is a surging hunger
225
00:09:27,801 --> 00:09:29,903
for American hip-hop
in Europe right now.
226
00:09:29,937 --> 00:09:31,639
You know, because of Brexit.
227
00:09:31,672 --> 00:09:32,773
You can't deny that.
228
00:09:32,806 --> 00:09:34,207
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
229
00:09:34,241 --> 00:09:35,475
That makes sense.
Anyway,
230
00:09:35,508 --> 00:09:38,111
I'm going
to Hot Mix 97.8 tonight.
231
00:09:38,145 --> 00:09:40,748
They are playing you on their
Magnifique Mash-up Hour.
232
00:09:40,781 --> 00:09:42,482
Make sure they play "Titty Tag."
233
00:09:42,515 --> 00:09:44,584
Or "Pussy on Swoll."
Mm-hmm.
234
00:09:44,618 --> 00:09:46,787
Uh, voulez voulez.
235
00:09:46,820 --> 00:09:48,555
Merci.
(forced laugh)
236
00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:50,658
Stupide. (chuckles)
I have to go.
237
00:09:50,691 --> 00:09:53,160
Ciao.
Also, make sure you...
238
00:09:54,327 --> 00:09:55,963
Girl.
Right?
239
00:09:55,996 --> 00:09:59,299
No, I meant girl...
240
00:09:59,332 --> 00:10:02,402
You have got to
leave the apartment.
241
00:10:02,435 --> 00:10:05,973
Sweetie, just go
outside for an hour.
242
00:10:06,006 --> 00:10:07,474
You're listening to
poor-people radio.
243
00:10:07,507 --> 00:10:09,576
You have the bush of
an old Italian man.
244
00:10:09,609 --> 00:10:10,811
You're doing crack.
245
00:10:10,844 --> 00:10:13,947
But isn't it
kind of awesome, though,
246
00:10:13,981 --> 00:10:16,850
that I came straight here after
Jimmy left me on that hill,
247
00:10:16,884 --> 00:10:17,851
and haven't left?
248
00:10:17,885 --> 00:10:18,919
Like, that is pretty much
249
00:10:18,952 --> 00:10:21,554
straight baller
when you think about it.
250
00:10:23,323 --> 00:10:26,259
What if I run into him
and then I die?
251
00:10:26,293 --> 00:10:28,628
I'm trying to
stalk him online,
252
00:10:28,662 --> 00:10:30,130
but that idiot
hasn't updated anything.
253
00:10:30,163 --> 00:10:32,465
Have you figured out
why he left yet?
254
00:10:32,499 --> 00:10:35,302
Why he asked me to be his wife
and then drove away?
255
00:10:35,335 --> 00:10:38,338
Best I can figure, he was
paid by one of my enemies.
256
00:10:38,371 --> 00:10:42,442
It was just a long con to prank
me by someone who I did wrong.
257
00:10:42,475 --> 00:10:44,344
Probably Jason Mraz
for when I called him
258
00:10:44,377 --> 00:10:46,279
a fedora-wearing diarrhea.
259
00:10:46,313 --> 00:10:49,182
Do you believe Edgar
that he hasn't heard from Jimmy?
260
00:10:49,216 --> 00:10:51,852
Oh, no. Edgar is obviously
covering for him.
261
00:10:51,885 --> 00:10:53,687
Really? That fink.
262
00:10:53,721 --> 00:10:56,223
Well, no one lies to me.
263
00:10:56,256 --> 00:10:57,657
Hey, do you know where
those Eskimo Pies are
264
00:10:57,691 --> 00:10:59,326
that I put in the freezer?
265
00:10:59,359 --> 00:11:01,161
Oh, I forgot to tell you,
the police came for them.
266
00:11:01,194 --> 00:11:02,696
Weird.
267
00:11:02,730 --> 00:11:03,997
Oh, well.
268
00:11:05,598 --> 00:11:07,768
*
269
00:11:14,908 --> 00:11:16,243
(knocks on door)
270
00:11:16,276 --> 00:11:17,577
Come in!
271
00:11:19,847 --> 00:11:22,149
Lindsay.
What are you doing?
272
00:11:22,182 --> 00:11:23,817
I'm just trying to come up
with some pitch ideas
273
00:11:23,851 --> 00:11:25,085
for the show
I'm working on,
274
00:11:25,118 --> 00:11:26,386
Doug Loves Sketches.
275
00:11:26,419 --> 00:11:28,188
It's about sketches.
Doug loves 'em.
276
00:11:28,221 --> 00:11:29,890
I know, I watched season one.
277
00:11:29,923 --> 00:11:31,558
I loved "Guido Baby."
(gasps)
278
00:11:32,559 --> 00:11:33,894
"Guido Baby" was mine.
279
00:11:33,927 --> 00:11:35,162
You could totally tell!
280
00:11:35,195 --> 00:11:36,563
BOTH:
"Wah!
281
00:11:36,596 --> 00:11:37,697
Oh!"
282
00:11:37,731 --> 00:11:39,399
Jimmy!
283
00:11:39,432 --> 00:11:41,168
Jimmy, I'm coming down!
284
00:11:41,201 --> 00:11:43,170
What are you doing?
I know he's here.
285
00:11:43,203 --> 00:11:44,404
He's really not.
Please.
286
00:11:44,437 --> 00:11:46,106
I could read people
like a deck of cards,
287
00:11:46,139 --> 00:11:48,041
and you're holding
the "Q" of clovers.
288
00:11:48,075 --> 00:11:50,343
Give him up, chico!
Where is he?
289
00:11:50,377 --> 00:11:52,112
He's not here.
He never came back, okay?
290
00:11:53,613 --> 00:11:55,548
Do you know how hard
that was for me?
291
00:11:55,582 --> 00:11:57,084
At first, I drove around
looking for him,
292
00:11:57,117 --> 00:11:59,352
from bar to bar, every night.
293
00:11:59,386 --> 00:12:01,421
Showing photos, asking around.
294
00:12:01,454 --> 00:12:03,423
I even started
a hotline.
295
00:12:03,456 --> 00:12:06,860
Tips came in,
but they never led anywhere.
296
00:12:06,894 --> 00:12:08,762
Now I just...
297
00:12:08,796 --> 00:12:11,531
keep a light on for him and...
298
00:12:11,564 --> 00:12:13,266
I leave him messages
every once and awhile
299
00:12:13,300 --> 00:12:15,202
just to hear his voice.
(music ends)
300
00:12:15,235 --> 00:12:16,937
But life goes on.
It must.
301
00:12:16,970 --> 00:12:18,405
Ha!
302
00:12:18,438 --> 00:12:20,941
That's too many details.
303
00:12:20,974 --> 00:12:22,542
Look.
304
00:12:22,575 --> 00:12:24,144
I redecorated.
305
00:12:25,478 --> 00:12:28,181
Would I dare do that
if Jimmy was still here?
306
00:12:29,282 --> 00:12:30,984
He'd kill you.
307
00:12:31,018 --> 00:12:32,419
(whispers):
Exactly.
308
00:12:32,452 --> 00:12:34,121
(sighs)
309
00:12:36,356 --> 00:12:37,791
(sighs)
310
00:12:37,825 --> 00:12:40,127
So he just never
came home from proposing?
311
00:12:40,160 --> 00:12:42,262
He just disappeared?
312
00:12:42,295 --> 00:12:44,932
Maybe he moved
back to England.
313
00:12:44,965 --> 00:12:47,300
I don't know.
314
00:12:47,334 --> 00:12:48,802
But he's gone.
315
00:12:55,208 --> 00:12:56,476
WOMAN (on TV):
So you're sure
316
00:12:56,509 --> 00:12:57,845
a handsome fellow like you
317
00:12:57,878 --> 00:12:59,612
doesn't have a girlfriend.
(phone vibrates)
318
00:12:59,646 --> 00:13:00,848
Yo.
319
00:13:00,881 --> 00:13:02,115
LINDSAY:
You won L.A.
320
00:13:02,149 --> 00:13:03,350
What?
321
00:13:03,383 --> 00:13:04,918
Jimmy never came home either.
322
00:13:04,952 --> 00:13:06,286
Guess you guys are both pussies.
323
00:13:06,319 --> 00:13:08,188
Gretch, he's gone.
324
00:13:08,221 --> 00:13:09,857
He must've drove back
to England.
325
00:13:09,890 --> 00:13:11,124
Whoa.
326
00:13:11,158 --> 00:13:13,293
Okay.
327
00:13:13,326 --> 00:13:15,162
Thanks.
WOMAN (on TV):
I saw everything!
328
00:13:15,195 --> 00:13:17,497
MAN:
Since this is obviously over,
329
00:13:17,530 --> 00:13:18,966
I'll just be (bleep) honest.
330
00:13:18,999 --> 00:13:20,533
I was gonna bang that chick.
331
00:13:20,567 --> 00:13:21,801
(exhales)
332
00:13:21,835 --> 00:13:24,037
(softly):
Okay.
333
00:13:24,071 --> 00:13:25,839
(car horn honks)
334
00:13:28,141 --> 00:13:30,143
*
335
00:13:34,047 --> 00:13:36,049
(exhales)
336
00:13:37,384 --> 00:13:39,887
(siren wailing)
337
00:13:39,920 --> 00:13:42,522
(helicopter blades whirring)
338
00:13:42,555 --> 00:13:44,557
(indistinct chatter)
339
00:13:50,063 --> 00:13:53,901
So, what would you say your
most pressing style needs
340
00:13:53,934 --> 00:13:56,169
are right now?
Trends.
341
00:13:56,203 --> 00:13:59,139
I need to be told what
the trends are going to be.
342
00:13:59,172 --> 00:14:01,975
Like... what are people
wearing in Japan
343
00:14:02,009 --> 00:14:03,710
next year? Hmm?
344
00:14:03,743 --> 00:14:05,145
Also, been really
feeling poopy pants
345
00:14:05,178 --> 00:14:06,379
these days.
346
00:14:06,413 --> 00:14:08,048
No autographs.
Uh-uh. (snaps)
347
00:14:08,081 --> 00:14:09,349
You need to go!
348
00:14:10,283 --> 00:14:11,718
Hi!
349
00:14:11,751 --> 00:14:13,086
You guys are out of
Goldfish, by the way.
350
00:14:13,120 --> 00:14:14,421
Can I help you?
Um, sorry.
351
00:14:14,454 --> 00:14:15,688
That's my...
352
00:14:16,689 --> 00:14:18,558
Sorry.
353
00:14:18,591 --> 00:14:20,928
(whispers):
What are you doing?
354
00:14:20,961 --> 00:14:22,029
I tried to go outside,
355
00:14:22,062 --> 00:14:23,596
but it's boring as shit.
356
00:14:23,630 --> 00:14:25,065
Shh.
It's just busses
357
00:14:25,098 --> 00:14:26,399
and old Asian ladies
358
00:14:26,433 --> 00:14:27,667
with the wheelie carts.
359
00:14:27,700 --> 00:14:29,937
When did sounds
get so loud, yo?
360
00:14:29,970 --> 00:14:31,204
Anyway, so I came here.
361
00:14:31,238 --> 00:14:32,439
What are you guys doing?
Gretchen!
362
00:14:32,472 --> 00:14:34,707
I need you
to listen to me.
363
00:14:34,741 --> 00:14:37,210
I cannot be
your only person.
364
00:14:37,244 --> 00:14:39,446
Why not?
Gretchen,
365
00:14:39,479 --> 00:14:40,747
this is my place
of business.
366
00:14:40,780 --> 00:14:42,015
Go.
367
00:14:42,049 --> 00:14:43,616
But I don't want to go.
Go.
368
00:14:43,650 --> 00:14:46,119
Go. Go.
369
00:14:46,153 --> 00:14:48,088
Go.
370
00:14:51,959 --> 00:14:53,193
Sorry.
371
00:14:53,226 --> 00:14:54,962
Mentally ill neighbor.
372
00:14:54,995 --> 00:14:56,229
(chuckles)
373
00:14:56,263 --> 00:14:57,464
Thanks, Obama.
374
00:14:57,497 --> 00:14:58,765
(both laugh)
375
00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:01,868
(rock music playing
from car stereo)
376
00:15:01,901 --> 00:15:03,903
(sighs)
377
00:15:06,739 --> 00:15:10,077
(gasps)
Oh, good! You're done!
378
00:15:10,110 --> 00:15:11,611
What are we gonna do now?
379
00:15:11,644 --> 00:15:14,147
Have you been out here
the whole time?!
380
00:15:14,181 --> 00:15:16,083
Yeah, just like
three hours.
381
00:15:16,116 --> 00:15:17,550
(sighs)
You told me to wait outside.
382
00:15:17,584 --> 00:15:19,786
I introduced
this cabbie to Jack FM.
383
00:15:19,819 --> 00:15:21,754
(singsongy):
He loves it!
384
00:15:21,788 --> 00:15:23,423
(laughs)
Not that Jack would care.
385
00:15:23,456 --> 00:15:26,293
That guy does not play
by society's rules.
386
00:15:26,326 --> 00:15:28,728
I meant go outside
into the world.
387
00:15:28,761 --> 00:15:30,130
You are losing your shit
388
00:15:30,163 --> 00:15:32,265
and moping about
your ex-boyfriend, but...
389
00:15:32,299 --> 00:15:33,500
Not "ex," he's not
my ex-boyfriend.
390
00:15:33,533 --> 00:15:34,767
We're still
technically engaged.
391
00:15:34,801 --> 00:15:36,503
Are you goddamn kidding me?
392
00:15:36,536 --> 00:15:39,006
I don't know!
Who knows?!
393
00:15:39,039 --> 00:15:40,907
You don't know!
394
00:15:40,940 --> 00:15:42,142
Do you know?
395
00:15:42,175 --> 00:15:43,143
(sighs)
396
00:15:44,644 --> 00:15:48,581
You are my best friend
in the entire world.
397
00:15:48,615 --> 00:15:50,083
We share a toothbrush.
398
00:15:50,117 --> 00:15:51,118
We do?
399
00:15:51,151 --> 00:15:52,519
But you can't come home tonight.
400
00:15:52,552 --> 00:15:53,953
I can go anywhere.
401
00:15:53,987 --> 00:15:55,188
I know,
let's go kill someone.
402
00:15:55,222 --> 00:15:57,324
Focus!
Okay.
403
00:15:57,357 --> 00:15:59,326
That's better.
Babe,
404
00:15:59,359 --> 00:16:00,793
this is for your own good.
405
00:16:00,827 --> 00:16:03,263
I am only going
to say this once:
406
00:16:03,296 --> 00:16:05,932
Gretchen, it's been...
407
00:16:05,965 --> 00:16:07,367
* One week since
you looked at me *
408
00:16:07,400 --> 00:16:08,835
* Cocked your head to the
side and said "I'm angry" *
409
00:16:08,868 --> 00:16:10,370
* Five days since
you laughed at me *
410
00:16:10,403 --> 00:16:11,938
* You said, "Get back together,
come back and see me" *
411
00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:13,340
* Three days since
the living room *
412
00:16:13,373 --> 00:16:14,774
* Realized it's all my fault,
but couldn't tell you *
413
00:16:14,807 --> 00:16:16,176
* Yesterday you'd forgiven me
414
00:16:16,209 --> 00:16:17,810
* But it'll still be two days
till I say I'm sorry *
415
00:16:17,844 --> 00:16:19,046
* Hold it now and
watch me hoodwink *
416
00:16:19,079 --> 00:16:20,047
* Make yourself think
417
00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:21,148
* Think you're looking
at Aquaman *
418
00:16:21,181 --> 00:16:22,449
* I summon fish to the dish,
although *
419
00:16:22,482 --> 00:16:24,051
* I like the Chalet Swiss,
I like the sushi *
420
00:16:24,084 --> 00:16:25,318
* 'Cause it's never hits the
frying pan, hot like wasabi *
421
00:16:25,352 --> 00:16:26,553
* When I bust rhymes
422
00:16:26,586 --> 00:16:28,055
* Big like LeAnn Rimes
'cause I'm all about value *
423
00:16:28,088 --> 00:16:29,189
* Bert Kaempfert's
got the mad hits. *
(screams)
424
00:16:34,161 --> 00:16:35,462
I can't take it anymore!
425
00:16:35,495 --> 00:16:36,863
EDGAR:
What's wrong?
Well, I just got done
426
00:16:36,896 --> 00:16:38,231
with a full day at work.
427
00:16:38,265 --> 00:16:39,732
And then I had night work,
and now
428
00:16:39,766 --> 00:16:41,334
I have homework.
429
00:16:41,368 --> 00:16:42,835
That's three kinds of work.
430
00:16:42,869 --> 00:16:44,737
And Gretchen won't give me
any space.
431
00:16:44,771 --> 00:16:46,839
She Canada-rapped at me.
432
00:16:46,873 --> 00:16:48,875
You and me, we have jobs now.
433
00:16:48,908 --> 00:16:50,110
We are businesspeople.
434
00:16:52,045 --> 00:16:53,846
(gulps)
Edgar?
435
00:16:57,617 --> 00:17:00,187
We're the serious ones now.
436
00:17:00,220 --> 00:17:02,389
Oh, my God.
437
00:17:06,193 --> 00:17:09,062
I miss them.
Me, too.
438
00:17:14,067 --> 00:17:15,502
(as Jimmy):
My God, at least use
439
00:17:15,535 --> 00:17:17,237
a coaster, woman.
(laughs)
440
00:17:17,270 --> 00:17:18,705
(laughs)
441
00:17:18,738 --> 00:17:19,939
(as Gretchen):
But I'm too busy looking at
442
00:17:19,972 --> 00:17:21,408
awesome dogs on the Internet.
443
00:17:21,441 --> 00:17:24,211
Right, that's it,
I can't take it anymore!
444
00:17:24,244 --> 00:17:25,845
I'm going downstairs.
445
00:17:25,878 --> 00:17:28,014
Well, I was gonna go
down there anyway
446
00:17:28,047 --> 00:17:30,550
to take a shower
and not wash my legs.
447
00:17:30,583 --> 00:17:33,420
Maybe I'll work on
my tree house blueprint.
448
00:17:33,453 --> 00:17:35,788
Perhaps I'll add a wall.
449
00:17:35,822 --> 00:17:38,024
Don't bug me in there,
I'm gonna be jerking it
450
00:17:38,057 --> 00:17:39,359
to gangbang porn.
451
00:17:39,392 --> 00:17:42,229
I'm going to drink
alcohol in my bed
452
00:17:42,262 --> 00:17:44,297
and read a very
boring book.
453
00:17:44,331 --> 00:17:46,032
No, pay attention to me.
454
00:17:46,065 --> 00:17:48,135
I'm Gretchen.
Play with my hair.
455
00:17:48,168 --> 00:17:50,703
Rambling speech about
myself, pointed insult,
456
00:17:50,737 --> 00:17:53,440
mock horror, extended
metaphor that gets off track,
457
00:17:53,473 --> 00:17:55,242
and then I call
myself out for it!
458
00:17:55,275 --> 00:17:57,877
(chuckling): Thirstiness,
nasal laugh, being gross.
459
00:17:57,910 --> 00:18:00,113
Yet another reminder
that I'm mentally ill.
460
00:18:00,147 --> 00:18:01,648
Thirstiness.
461
00:18:01,681 --> 00:18:03,916
Play with me.
Come on, I'm Gretchen.
462
00:18:03,950 --> 00:18:05,418
Kiss me!
Stop bothering me!
463
00:18:05,452 --> 00:18:07,487
I'm bored.
All right, fine,
I'll kiss you.
464
00:18:07,520 --> 00:18:09,122
Jesus!
Yeah.
465
00:18:11,023 --> 00:18:12,825
Well, do me already, dummy.
Ah, fine.
466
00:18:12,859 --> 00:18:15,295
(both chuckle)
467
00:18:15,328 --> 00:18:17,164
* Ooh... *
468
00:18:17,197 --> 00:18:20,267
(both moaning softly)
469
00:18:20,300 --> 00:18:22,969
* Ooh... *
470
00:18:28,641 --> 00:18:31,043
* Ooh... *
471
00:18:37,217 --> 00:18:38,451
Hi.
472
00:18:38,485 --> 00:18:40,287
Is this seat taken?
473
00:18:40,320 --> 00:18:41,988
Why, no.
474
00:18:46,893 --> 00:18:48,895
*
475
00:18:56,135 --> 00:18:58,505
*
476
00:19:05,678 --> 00:19:08,848
(both panting)
477
00:19:08,881 --> 00:19:12,452
Listen, Edgar, that was...
really good sex.
478
00:19:12,485 --> 00:19:14,321
Right? Like really good.
479
00:19:14,354 --> 00:19:17,690
But just so you know, I'm really
committed to my job right now
480
00:19:17,724 --> 00:19:20,460
and I don't want you
to get your feelings hurt.
481
00:19:20,493 --> 00:19:23,230
(panting softly)
482
00:19:23,263 --> 00:19:25,064
(exhales slowly)
483
00:19:25,097 --> 00:19:27,400
I am so glad you said that
484
00:19:27,434 --> 00:19:29,236
because, as amazing as that was,
485
00:19:29,269 --> 00:19:31,170
I feel, like, nothing for you.
486
00:19:31,204 --> 00:19:32,839
I am all about my job right now.
487
00:19:32,872 --> 00:19:34,073
Really?
Yeah.
488
00:19:34,106 --> 00:19:35,308
Oh. Good, then.
489
00:19:35,342 --> 00:19:37,710
(both laugh)
490
00:19:41,248 --> 00:19:43,650
Oh.
So, wait,
491
00:19:43,683 --> 00:19:45,485
we just had dope sex,
492
00:19:45,518 --> 00:19:46,853
and don't feel
the need to discuss it.
493
00:19:46,886 --> 00:19:49,088
Ew. Not at all.
494
00:19:49,121 --> 00:19:50,557
And we could, like,
do this again
495
00:19:50,590 --> 00:19:52,925
whenever we feel
like it-- or not--
496
00:19:52,959 --> 00:19:55,061
and be fine either way.
497
00:19:55,094 --> 00:19:56,396
I think so.
498
00:19:58,398 --> 00:19:59,599
Me, too.
499
00:19:59,632 --> 00:20:00,867
(laughs)
500
00:20:00,900 --> 00:20:02,101
Cool.
Cool.
501
00:20:02,134 --> 00:20:03,503
Cool. Cool.
Cool.
502
00:20:03,536 --> 00:20:04,737
Cool.
503
00:20:04,771 --> 00:20:06,573
You know,
I could go again.
504
00:20:06,606 --> 00:20:09,175
(claps) How about this?
An hour of sustained work,
505
00:20:09,208 --> 00:20:10,410
and then round two.
506
00:20:10,443 --> 00:20:13,380
You are so smart.
Pssh!
507
00:20:13,413 --> 00:20:15,782
(chuckles)
(sighs)
508
00:20:15,815 --> 00:20:17,750
All right.
Phew!
509
00:20:17,784 --> 00:20:19,519
This is so great.
(page flips)
510
00:20:19,552 --> 00:20:21,421
After all that time
with annoying-ass Gretchen,
511
00:20:21,454 --> 00:20:23,256
you're not even trying
to bother me while I...
512
00:20:23,290 --> 00:20:24,891
Shh...
Sorry.
513
00:20:26,293 --> 00:20:28,261
*
514
00:20:28,295 --> 00:20:30,497
(sighs deeply)
515
00:20:46,178 --> 00:20:50,783
* Living in a concrete jungle
516
00:20:53,520 --> 00:20:57,123
* Searching for something
that I *
517
00:20:57,156 --> 00:20:59,326
* Don't think I'll ever find
518
00:20:59,359 --> 00:21:00,993
Come here, you.
519
00:21:01,027 --> 00:21:03,496
* Chisel the walls of the city
520
00:21:03,530 --> 00:21:06,766
* That blinds me
521
00:21:08,301 --> 00:21:09,636
Mmm.
522
00:21:09,669 --> 00:21:11,338
There she is.
523
00:21:11,371 --> 00:21:13,072
Oh, I missed you.
524
00:21:13,105 --> 00:21:14,774
* To relate to
525
00:21:14,807 --> 00:21:18,110
(moans)
Divine.
526
00:21:18,144 --> 00:21:19,612
Shh. Shh.
527
00:21:19,646 --> 00:21:21,748
Shh.
528
00:21:21,781 --> 00:21:23,316
(phone chimes and vibrates)
529
00:21:27,954 --> 00:21:29,989
(Ty moans softly)
530
00:21:30,022 --> 00:21:33,860
* Take me home
531
00:21:33,893 --> 00:21:37,597
* I am ready for it
532
00:21:37,630 --> 00:21:41,167
* I know you can love
533
00:21:41,200 --> 00:21:43,770
* More than I can
534
00:21:43,803 --> 00:21:45,171
(Ty moaning)
535
00:21:45,204 --> 00:21:46,839
* Take me home
536
00:21:48,741 --> 00:21:52,379
* I am ready for it
537
00:21:52,412 --> 00:21:56,115
* I know you can love
538
00:21:56,148 --> 00:21:59,786
* More than I can
539
00:21:59,819 --> 00:22:03,523
* Take me home
540
00:22:03,556 --> 00:22:07,159
* I am ready for it
541
00:22:07,193 --> 00:22:10,730
* I know you can love
542
00:22:10,763 --> 00:22:12,865
* More than I...
543
00:22:12,899 --> 00:22:15,868
(dog barks)
544
00:22:15,902 --> 00:22:18,738
Captioning sponsored by
20th CENTURY FOX TELEVISION
545
00:22:18,771 --> 00:22:20,840
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
546
00:22:23,342 --> 00:22:24,877
Hey, fellas.
547
00:22:24,911 --> 00:22:27,514
I'm on antidepressants,
so I won't even cry after.
548
00:22:27,547 --> 00:22:30,349
-Are you a fan of poetry?
-Which one first?
549
00:22:30,383 --> 00:22:34,086
We shall not go gentle
into this good night.
550
00:22:34,787 --> 00:22:36,423
If you know what I mean.
551
00:22:38,958 --> 00:22:41,861
An FX original series
552
00:22:41,894 --> 00:22:44,330
from director Guillermo Del Toro
553
00:22:44,363 --> 00:22:46,766
and executive producer
Carlton Cuse.
554
00:22:46,799 --> 00:22:48,768
The final chapter begins.
555
00:22:48,801 --> 00:22:50,603
The Strain.
556
00:22:50,637 --> 00:22:53,606
All new Sundays at 10:00 on FX.
557
00:22:54,807 --> 00:22:56,743
I have to eat
this onion?
558
00:22:56,776 --> 00:22:58,711
-Honey, trust me.
-(sighs)
559
00:22:58,745 --> 00:23:02,582
Your mom knows.
It's time for you
to learn these secrets.
560
00:23:07,554 --> 00:23:10,389
-How does this help?
-It doesn't. Ha!
561
00:23:10,990 --> 00:23:12,258
Oh, my God.
37915
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