All language subtitles for Taxi - S05E10 - Elaine and the Monk.eng

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,769 --> 00:00:04,703 (theme song playing) 2 00:01:18,412 --> 00:01:20,712 (humming happily) 3 00:01:20,781 --> 00:01:22,914 Excuse me. (laughs) 4 00:01:22,982 --> 00:01:24,082 What do you say, guys? 5 00:01:24,151 --> 00:01:25,183 Well. Oh, my gosh. 6 00:01:25,252 --> 00:01:26,329 (laughs) How come you're so happy? 7 00:01:26,353 --> 00:01:27,419 Well... 8 00:01:27,488 --> 00:01:28,798 I didn't tell you about this before 9 00:01:28,822 --> 00:01:30,222 because if it didn't work out, 10 00:01:30,291 --> 00:01:31,935 it would have been real, real embarrassing, 11 00:01:31,959 --> 00:01:34,192 but I've got a chance to make big money. 12 00:01:34,260 --> 00:01:36,828 Wait a minute. What is it? What is it? 13 00:01:36,897 --> 00:01:38,630 Chinchillas. 14 00:01:38,699 --> 00:01:40,799 Chinchillas? Eight months ago, 15 00:01:40,868 --> 00:01:41,900 I bought six of them. 16 00:01:41,968 --> 00:01:43,335 Guess how many I got now. 17 00:01:43,404 --> 00:01:44,803 Go ahead, take a guess. Go on! 18 00:01:44,872 --> 00:01:50,642 What an interesting question you pose, Tony. 19 00:01:50,711 --> 00:01:55,513 Considering gestation period 20 00:01:55,582 --> 00:01:57,950 and average litter size... 21 00:01:58,018 --> 00:02:05,290 about eight months... uh... you've got 162. 22 00:02:07,261 --> 00:02:09,461 No, I got 165, Jim! 23 00:02:09,530 --> 00:02:11,462 165! 24 00:02:11,531 --> 00:02:15,300 What was I thinking of? 25 00:02:17,070 --> 00:02:19,003 I feel about this big. 26 00:02:20,074 --> 00:02:22,007 Jim, you were off by three. 27 00:02:22,076 --> 00:02:24,943 Oh, go ahead, lady, rub it in. 28 00:02:29,983 --> 00:02:32,851 Anyway, uh, a chinchilla coat costs thousands of dollars, 29 00:02:32,920 --> 00:02:37,055 so I'm on easy street as soon as those little guys start to shed. 30 00:02:37,124 --> 00:02:38,223 Watch out! 31 00:02:38,292 --> 00:02:40,258 Ooh! Oh, no. 32 00:02:40,327 --> 00:02:41,660 Oh, no, no, no. Oh, Tony. 33 00:02:41,728 --> 00:02:44,129 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. 34 00:02:44,198 --> 00:02:46,298 (chortling) 35 00:02:46,367 --> 00:02:48,900 I hate to be the one to break this to you, Banta, 36 00:02:48,969 --> 00:02:51,603 but they don't shed. 37 00:02:51,672 --> 00:02:54,606 Oh, what do you mean? You got to clip 'em? 38 00:02:54,675 --> 00:02:56,040 Uh-uh. 39 00:02:56,109 --> 00:02:59,577 If you want to make coats out of the little babies, you got to... 40 00:02:59,646 --> 00:03:00,912 (makes slicing sound) 41 00:03:00,981 --> 00:03:02,915 (screaming) 42 00:03:05,285 --> 00:03:07,151 Oh, no! 43 00:03:07,220 --> 00:03:09,521 Oh, sorry, Tony. 44 00:03:09,589 --> 00:03:10,788 Well, I can't do it. 45 00:03:10,857 --> 00:03:13,391 I can't. I'm not gonna kill little-little Chubby 46 00:03:13,460 --> 00:03:17,095 and Muffin and... Whiskers and Boots and Iron Man 47 00:03:17,164 --> 00:03:19,130 and Rocky One, Rocky Two, Rocky Three, 48 00:03:19,199 --> 00:03:20,265 and Toots and Joey 49 00:03:20,333 --> 00:03:21,500 and Groovy... Wait a minute. 50 00:03:21,569 --> 00:03:24,402 Tony, Tony! You named all of them? 51 00:03:24,471 --> 00:03:26,671 I had to have something to put on their bowls. 52 00:03:31,211 --> 00:03:33,144 Look what I got, everybody. 53 00:03:37,651 --> 00:03:39,584 A monk. 54 00:03:41,021 --> 00:03:43,889 Isn't that something? 55 00:03:43,957 --> 00:03:46,691 You-You know the party you're all invited to, 56 00:03:46,760 --> 00:03:50,295 to come tonight to meet Simka's cousin Zifka. 57 00:03:50,363 --> 00:03:51,463 ALEX: Yeah. TONY: Yeah? 58 00:03:51,531 --> 00:03:52,798 Well, this is him. 59 00:03:52,866 --> 00:03:53,965 Oh. 60 00:03:54,034 --> 00:03:55,733 This is some surprise, huh? 61 00:03:55,802 --> 00:03:57,002 Yeah. 62 00:03:57,071 --> 00:04:00,739 (chuckles): Wow. 63 00:04:00,808 --> 00:04:05,310 When I was a reverend, I used to wear a robe myself, 64 00:04:05,379 --> 00:04:07,946 but it didn't look like that. 65 00:04:08,015 --> 00:04:10,214 What-What did it look like? 66 00:04:10,283 --> 00:04:12,216 This. 67 00:04:14,220 --> 00:04:17,322 Well, anyway, I won't bother to introduce him now. 68 00:04:17,391 --> 00:04:19,291 I'll see you all at 8:00. 69 00:04:19,360 --> 00:04:21,037 Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. 70 00:04:21,061 --> 00:04:22,138 Why can't you introduce him now? 71 00:04:22,162 --> 00:04:24,929 He can't talk. 72 00:04:24,998 --> 00:04:27,599 He has taken a vow of non-communication. 73 00:04:27,667 --> 00:04:29,634 See? Oh, oh... 74 00:04:29,703 --> 00:04:31,636 He can't even do this. 75 00:04:35,509 --> 00:04:36,608 And he can't even do this. 76 00:04:36,676 --> 00:04:37,887 ALEX: Yeah, yeah. We understand. 77 00:04:37,911 --> 00:04:39,010 You know, he can't even... 78 00:04:39,079 --> 00:04:40,645 No, no. We understand, yeah. 79 00:04:40,714 --> 00:04:42,347 Excuse me. 80 00:04:42,415 --> 00:04:45,750 I wanted to ask a question about this party tonight. 81 00:04:45,819 --> 00:04:49,554 Are we going to get wild or crazy? 82 00:04:49,623 --> 00:04:52,190 You know, talk? 83 00:04:52,259 --> 00:04:54,125 Sure. 84 00:04:54,194 --> 00:04:57,495 See, Zifka comes from a monastery in my country 85 00:04:57,564 --> 00:05:00,798 that has a religious order that is much different 86 00:05:00,867 --> 00:05:03,468 than any religious order you ever heard of. 87 00:05:03,537 --> 00:05:06,071 Every ten years, each monk in the monastery 88 00:05:06,139 --> 00:05:07,706 takes a week off, 89 00:05:07,775 --> 00:05:09,640 and during that week, he is free 90 00:05:09,709 --> 00:05:11,809 to sample all of life's pleasures. 91 00:05:11,878 --> 00:05:14,646 Zifka's week starts tonight at 8:00. 92 00:05:14,715 --> 00:05:16,247 So, see you all there. 93 00:05:16,316 --> 00:05:17,482 Bye-bye. 94 00:05:17,550 --> 00:05:19,717 Come on... come on. 95 00:05:22,889 --> 00:05:26,391 I admire that guy. 96 00:05:26,460 --> 00:05:29,528 Did you see the serenity in his eyes? 97 00:05:31,265 --> 00:05:34,232 It must be wonderful in there. 98 00:05:36,403 --> 00:05:39,938 I'm going to take a vow of silence myself. 99 00:05:41,474 --> 00:05:45,543 I, Jim Ignatowski, will no longer talk. 100 00:05:49,049 --> 00:05:50,315 Oh, that's easy. 101 00:05:50,384 --> 00:05:52,284 Oops. 102 00:05:56,189 --> 00:06:00,057 Everybody, it is 8:00. 103 00:06:00,126 --> 00:06:04,429 It's time for Zifka's week to begin! 104 00:06:04,497 --> 00:06:06,431 (zipping) Oh, gosh! 105 00:06:10,437 --> 00:06:15,440 Well, I wonder what sage words of wisdom 106 00:06:15,509 --> 00:06:20,011 he will impart after ten years of meditation. 107 00:06:20,080 --> 00:06:22,747 How do I look? 108 00:06:22,816 --> 00:06:24,649 You look wonderful. 109 00:06:24,718 --> 00:06:25,817 Oh. 110 00:06:25,886 --> 00:06:28,352 Zifka, we have a gift for you. 111 00:06:28,421 --> 00:06:29,721 A watch. 112 00:06:29,790 --> 00:06:33,624 Oh, but I cannot keep it when I go back to the monastery. 113 00:06:33,693 --> 00:06:35,660 That-That's the good part. 114 00:06:35,728 --> 00:06:38,163 Eh, we get it back when you leave. 115 00:06:41,201 --> 00:06:43,968 Oh. Thank you. 116 00:06:44,037 --> 00:06:45,203 Thank you. 117 00:06:45,271 --> 00:06:47,205 So, what are you going to do first? 118 00:06:48,975 --> 00:06:50,408 Slouch. 119 00:06:50,476 --> 00:06:54,512 At the monastery, they are such sticklers for posture. 120 00:06:54,581 --> 00:06:55,714 (chuckles) 121 00:06:55,783 --> 00:06:58,049 (sighing): Oh. Oh. 122 00:06:58,118 --> 00:07:01,052 Zifka, Zifka, please, stand up straight. 123 00:07:01,120 --> 00:07:02,988 We want you to meet our friends. 124 00:07:03,056 --> 00:07:04,189 That's right. 125 00:07:04,257 --> 00:07:06,258 Here, this is Louie. 126 00:07:06,326 --> 00:07:07,525 Louie! How you doing? 127 00:07:07,594 --> 00:07:08,693 (grunts) 128 00:07:08,762 --> 00:07:09,762 And this is Alex. 129 00:07:09,830 --> 00:07:10,995 Alex! Hi. 130 00:07:11,064 --> 00:07:12,163 Hi. 131 00:07:12,232 --> 00:07:13,632 And over here, this is Tony. 132 00:07:13,700 --> 00:07:16,834 Oh, how ya doing? Tony. 133 00:07:16,903 --> 00:07:18,469 And this is Jim. 134 00:07:18,538 --> 00:07:20,471 Jim! 135 00:07:26,813 --> 00:07:31,315 I-I want to thank you for bringing silence into my life. 136 00:07:33,052 --> 00:07:35,954 And over here, this-this is Elaine. 137 00:07:36,022 --> 00:07:37,689 Hello. 138 00:07:40,426 --> 00:07:41,993 Do you dance? 139 00:07:42,062 --> 00:07:44,028 Yes. 140 00:07:44,097 --> 00:07:45,563 I thought so. 141 00:07:45,632 --> 00:07:47,566 The man is a smoothie. 142 00:07:49,236 --> 00:07:51,736 That's what he loves more than anything. 143 00:07:51,805 --> 00:07:52,904 Dancing. 144 00:07:52,973 --> 00:07:54,973 Yes. Oh, my good friends, 145 00:07:55,042 --> 00:07:57,074 I am so pleased to know all of you. 146 00:07:57,143 --> 00:08:00,245 I have so much to catch up on in so little time. 147 00:08:00,313 --> 00:08:05,016 Latka, do you know what I would really love to do now? 148 00:08:05,084 --> 00:08:06,817 Well, no, golly gee. 149 00:08:06,886 --> 00:08:09,387 I wonder, what would you like to do now? 150 00:08:09,456 --> 00:08:11,723 I would love to listen 151 00:08:11,791 --> 00:08:16,260 to somebody really talented play the gruck. 152 00:08:16,329 --> 00:08:18,730 Oh, well, I wonder where we could find someone 153 00:08:18,799 --> 00:08:20,164 who knows how to play the gruck. 154 00:08:20,233 --> 00:08:24,202 Well, your cousin Zifka! 155 00:08:24,271 --> 00:08:26,805 SIMKA: Oh, that's right! 156 00:08:26,874 --> 00:08:31,376 Well, maybe he needs just a little bit of encouragement 157 00:08:31,444 --> 00:08:33,845 to play the gruck! 158 00:08:33,914 --> 00:08:35,847 ALL: Play the gruck! Play the gruck! 159 00:08:35,916 --> 00:08:37,982 (all chanting): Play the gruck! 160 00:08:38,050 --> 00:08:40,284 Okay, okay. 161 00:08:40,353 --> 00:08:42,854 He plays the eight-string gruck. 162 00:08:42,923 --> 00:08:45,422 He plays it so beautifully. 163 00:08:45,491 --> 00:08:47,892 He was a child prodigy. 164 00:08:47,961 --> 00:08:50,395 Did you know that at the age of 12, 165 00:08:50,464 --> 00:08:55,767 he was the second gruckist in the national symphony? 166 00:08:55,835 --> 00:08:58,169 There is a particular song, uh, 167 00:08:58,237 --> 00:09:00,638 from my country that I would like to sing. 168 00:09:00,707 --> 00:09:02,306 It, um... 169 00:09:02,375 --> 00:09:07,111 Tradition says that it may only be sung for a beautiful woman. 170 00:09:07,180 --> 00:09:08,379 (plays a chord) 171 00:09:08,448 --> 00:09:12,083 Uh, I think, Elaine, you fulfill those requirements. 172 00:09:12,152 --> 00:09:13,517 (chuckles) 173 00:09:13,586 --> 00:09:14,819 LOUIE: I knew it. 174 00:09:14,888 --> 00:09:17,221 He's been staring at your headlights all night. 175 00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:21,993 Headlights? 176 00:09:22,062 --> 00:09:25,797 Uh, "headlights" means, uh, eyes, Zifka... eyes. 177 00:09:25,866 --> 00:09:27,666 Well, in that case, I dedicate this song 178 00:09:27,734 --> 00:09:30,702 to Elaine's headlights. 179 00:09:33,940 --> 00:09:35,473 (sighs) 180 00:09:37,844 --> 00:09:40,779 (singing in native language) 181 00:09:53,894 --> 00:09:55,827 (singing and playing continues) 182 00:10:17,016 --> 00:10:18,883 That was beautiful. 183 00:10:18,952 --> 00:10:23,388 Elaine, in the song, he has asked you to go dancing with him 184 00:10:23,456 --> 00:10:25,390 in the village by moonlight. 185 00:10:25,459 --> 00:10:26,691 Aw. 186 00:10:29,696 --> 00:10:32,797 Hey, Zif, what you're really looking forward to 187 00:10:32,866 --> 00:10:34,032 is going dancing? 188 00:10:34,100 --> 00:10:35,299 Yes. Come on. 189 00:10:35,368 --> 00:10:37,368 I'll take ya dancing. I know a place. Come on. 190 00:10:37,437 --> 00:10:39,136 Oh! Gee, I just forgot. 191 00:10:39,205 --> 00:10:41,238 I just remembered. I can't make it. 192 00:10:41,307 --> 00:10:42,840 Elaine, come here a second. 193 00:10:42,909 --> 00:10:45,009 Oh, take it easy. 194 00:10:45,078 --> 00:10:47,679 Elaine, would you take Zifka dancing? 195 00:10:47,747 --> 00:10:50,448 Wink. Wink. 196 00:10:50,517 --> 00:10:51,649 Well, I don't... 197 00:10:51,718 --> 00:10:53,351 I-I'd love to, but, I mean, 198 00:10:53,420 --> 00:10:54,563 Simka, you have this party planned. 199 00:10:54,587 --> 00:10:56,554 Oh, no, no. Go ahead. 200 00:10:56,623 --> 00:10:59,757 All I prepared was a bowl of bread. 201 00:10:59,826 --> 00:11:03,227 Well, here I am in the same old rut: 202 00:11:03,296 --> 00:11:05,863 going out dancing with a monk. 203 00:11:05,932 --> 00:11:07,565 She's only kidding. She's a good sport. 204 00:11:07,634 --> 00:11:08,999 Go ahead. Have fun, you two. 205 00:11:09,068 --> 00:11:10,135 (all saying goodbyes) 206 00:11:10,203 --> 00:11:11,469 Thank you. 207 00:11:11,538 --> 00:11:12,469 He's all right. 208 00:11:12,538 --> 00:11:14,071 He's all right. 209 00:11:14,140 --> 00:11:17,108 All right, turn out the lights. Party's over. 210 00:11:17,177 --> 00:11:19,177 Bye-bye, everybody! 211 00:11:19,246 --> 00:11:20,545 Come back again. 212 00:11:20,613 --> 00:11:21,712 Sure. 213 00:11:21,781 --> 00:11:24,449 Yeah. We'll be right back. Yeah. 214 00:11:28,588 --> 00:11:30,789 (laughing) Just a second, Zifka. 215 00:11:30,857 --> 00:11:32,290 I just have to get my keys. 216 00:11:32,359 --> 00:11:33,491 Oh, Elaine, I... 217 00:11:33,560 --> 00:11:35,200 Thank you for a wonderful evening tonight. 218 00:11:35,228 --> 00:11:36,394 Oh... (laughs) 219 00:11:36,463 --> 00:11:40,698 Oh, I really enjoyed those clubs and the music. 220 00:11:40,767 --> 00:11:43,468 You know, I just wish I'd gotten you to dance. 221 00:11:43,537 --> 00:11:46,471 Oh, do you think less of me because I couldn't? 222 00:11:46,539 --> 00:11:48,806 No, of course not. 223 00:11:48,875 --> 00:11:52,276 I always wanted to, but I-I never really have. 224 00:11:52,345 --> 00:11:56,214 So, there are all those people there, you know. 225 00:11:56,282 --> 00:11:58,149 It makes me nervous. 226 00:11:58,218 --> 00:11:59,851 So why didn't you just imagine 227 00:11:59,920 --> 00:12:01,753 that you were dancing alone with me? 228 00:12:01,821 --> 00:12:03,621 Ah, that's what I was doing 229 00:12:03,690 --> 00:12:05,990 the whole time I was sitting there. 230 00:12:06,058 --> 00:12:08,693 (chuckles) 231 00:12:08,761 --> 00:12:10,862 Oh, you're good. 232 00:12:10,930 --> 00:12:13,864 Oh, no, no. 233 00:12:15,568 --> 00:12:17,568 ♪ Heaven... ♪ 234 00:12:17,637 --> 00:12:19,437 (laughs) 235 00:12:20,907 --> 00:12:22,874 ♪ I'm in heaven ♪ 236 00:12:22,942 --> 00:12:24,808 (laughs) 237 00:12:24,877 --> 00:12:30,581 ♪ And my heart beats so that I can hardly speak ♪ 238 00:12:30,650 --> 00:12:33,117 ♪ Da-da-da da-da da-da da-da ♪ 239 00:12:33,186 --> 00:12:34,885 ♪ Da-da da da... ♪ 240 00:12:34,954 --> 00:12:36,354 (chuckles) 241 00:12:36,422 --> 00:12:40,524 ♪ Da-da da-da da-da da-da da-da ♪ 242 00:12:42,896 --> 00:12:45,696 ♪ Oh, I'd love to go out fishing ♪ 243 00:12:45,765 --> 00:12:47,364 ♪ In a river or a creek ♪ 244 00:12:47,433 --> 00:12:48,700 (phone rings) 245 00:12:48,768 --> 00:12:52,736 ♪ But it doesn't thrill me half as much ♪ 246 00:12:52,805 --> 00:12:54,272 I'm busy. 247 00:13:02,715 --> 00:13:04,649 (laughing) 248 00:13:09,722 --> 00:13:12,023 ♪ Heaven ♪ 249 00:13:12,091 --> 00:13:15,659 ♪ I'm in heaven ♪ 250 00:13:18,898 --> 00:13:24,168 ♪ And my heart beats so that I can hardly speak... ♪ 251 00:13:24,236 --> 00:13:26,403 (Elaine laughing) 252 00:13:26,472 --> 00:13:29,507 ♪ And I seem to find ♪ 253 00:13:29,576 --> 00:13:33,545 ♪ The happiness I seek... ♪ 254 00:13:33,613 --> 00:13:36,447 Oh, I always wanted to do that. 255 00:13:36,516 --> 00:13:39,516 ♪ When we're out together ♪ 256 00:13:39,585 --> 00:13:42,786 ♪ Dancing cheek to cheek ♪ 257 00:13:43,890 --> 00:13:45,723 ♪ Dance with me ♪ 258 00:13:45,792 --> 00:13:49,427 ♪ I want my arms about you ♪ (laughing) 259 00:13:49,495 --> 00:13:52,763 ♪ All the charms about you ♪ 260 00:13:57,303 --> 00:14:01,306 ♪ When we're out together ♪ 261 00:14:01,374 --> 00:14:05,109 ♪ Dancing cheek to cheek. ♪ 262 00:14:05,178 --> 00:14:07,344 How long are you in town for? 263 00:14:07,413 --> 00:14:09,346 (laughs) 264 00:14:19,759 --> 00:14:21,692 (laughter) 265 00:14:23,162 --> 00:14:24,228 Oh, hi. 266 00:14:24,296 --> 00:14:26,397 Oh. What did you guys do today? 267 00:14:26,465 --> 00:14:27,632 Oh... oh! 268 00:14:27,701 --> 00:14:29,033 We went to the Bronx Zoo. 269 00:14:29,102 --> 00:14:30,668 And to the World Trade Center. 270 00:14:30,737 --> 00:14:32,570 And then... then we flew a kite 271 00:14:32,638 --> 00:14:33,837 in Central Park, you know, 272 00:14:33,906 --> 00:14:37,207 and then we went roller-skating down Fifth Avenue. 273 00:14:37,276 --> 00:14:40,578 Were you singing "I'm a Pepper, he's a Pepper"? 274 00:14:41,881 --> 00:14:44,115 So how'd you like the World Trade Center, Zifka? 275 00:14:44,184 --> 00:14:45,683 Oh, it... it was great. 276 00:14:45,752 --> 00:14:46,684 Mm-hmm. 277 00:14:46,752 --> 00:14:47,952 Well, listen, Elaine, uh, 278 00:14:48,021 --> 00:14:49,621 shall I meet you again same time tonight? 279 00:14:49,689 --> 00:14:50,689 Yes. 280 00:14:50,723 --> 00:14:52,223 Okay. (knocks on table) 281 00:14:52,292 --> 00:14:54,124 I'm going shopping. 282 00:14:54,193 --> 00:14:57,061 I'm going shopping to buy a present 283 00:14:57,130 --> 00:15:00,331 for a person, whose face like an angel, 284 00:15:00,399 --> 00:15:02,300 has made my visit here 285 00:15:02,368 --> 00:15:04,535 a treasure never to be forgotten. 286 00:15:04,604 --> 00:15:05,770 Oh, I'm so flattered. 287 00:15:05,838 --> 00:15:09,840 Even hearing you say it just makes me go crazy. 288 00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:11,108 Oh, Alex. 289 00:15:11,177 --> 00:15:13,043 I-I'll be leaving New York tonight. 290 00:15:13,112 --> 00:15:15,646 I'm going back to the monastery, so... 291 00:15:15,715 --> 00:15:17,849 so I'll be... won't be seeing you again. 292 00:15:17,918 --> 00:15:20,584 So, I just wanted you to know 293 00:15:20,653 --> 00:15:23,687 I'll be praying for you to find a little bit more happiness. 294 00:15:23,756 --> 00:15:25,390 Oh, oh, I'm fine, I'm fine. 295 00:15:25,458 --> 00:15:26,991 I'm just reading my newspaper. 296 00:15:27,060 --> 00:15:29,226 Well, it was really nice meeting you. 297 00:15:30,329 --> 00:15:31,329 Oh, good-bye. 298 00:15:31,397 --> 00:15:32,630 (smooching) 299 00:15:32,699 --> 00:15:33,731 (smooching) 300 00:15:33,799 --> 00:15:35,199 Come early. 301 00:15:35,268 --> 00:15:37,201 (laughing) 302 00:15:39,572 --> 00:15:42,140 He seems to be taking up a lot of your time, isn't he? 303 00:15:42,208 --> 00:15:43,340 Oh, yeah. 304 00:15:43,409 --> 00:15:44,842 Yeah, to tell you the truth, 305 00:15:44,911 --> 00:15:47,078 we're spending every chance we get together. 306 00:15:47,146 --> 00:15:49,547 Mm-hmm. He's so much fun, Alex. 307 00:15:49,615 --> 00:15:52,617 You know, he-he finds pleasure in everything. 308 00:15:52,685 --> 00:15:54,452 He... it's, like, 309 00:15:54,520 --> 00:15:57,188 all a brand-new experience for him because... 310 00:15:57,257 --> 00:15:59,289 because... because he thinks that way, you know, 311 00:15:59,358 --> 00:16:01,024 and-and he makes me feel that way, too. 312 00:16:01,093 --> 00:16:03,828 I mean, things I've seen and done all my life 313 00:16:03,897 --> 00:16:07,131 suddenly seem wonderful to me because he thinks they are. 314 00:16:07,199 --> 00:16:10,701 Oh, I'll tell you, this has been the best week of my life. 315 00:16:10,770 --> 00:16:13,671 Well, that's very nice for both of you. 316 00:16:13,740 --> 00:16:15,839 Is something wrong? 317 00:16:16,943 --> 00:16:18,409 Well, now that you mention it... 318 00:16:18,477 --> 00:16:20,478 I hope you don't take this the wrong way, 319 00:16:20,546 --> 00:16:22,981 but you are the worst parent I've ever seen. 320 00:16:23,049 --> 00:16:25,649 What?! You were spending so much time with Zifka, 321 00:16:25,718 --> 00:16:27,818 you forgot about your own son Jason's birthday party. 322 00:16:27,887 --> 00:16:28,819 Oh, no. 323 00:16:28,887 --> 00:16:30,321 Every year, I come over and we go 324 00:16:30,390 --> 00:16:31,800 to Coney Island or something like that? Yeah. 325 00:16:31,824 --> 00:16:33,524 And I woke up this morning and I remembered 326 00:16:33,593 --> 00:16:34,736 the birthday was yesterday, and I... 327 00:16:34,760 --> 00:16:36,538 and those kids really must have missed their party. 328 00:16:36,562 --> 00:16:38,929 Well, actually, Alex, we had the party. 329 00:16:38,998 --> 00:16:40,642 You see, and-and Zifka was there, and we... 330 00:16:40,666 --> 00:16:43,368 we were having such a good time that I forgot to call you. 331 00:16:43,436 --> 00:16:44,535 I'm sorry. 332 00:16:44,604 --> 00:16:46,938 Oh, that's all right. 333 00:16:47,006 --> 00:16:48,784 I was just concerned that they have a good time. 334 00:16:48,808 --> 00:16:51,241 Oh, yeah. They like Zifka? 335 00:16:51,310 --> 00:16:52,477 They love him. 336 00:16:52,545 --> 00:16:54,278 Yeah. I can see how they'd like him. 337 00:16:54,347 --> 00:16:56,280 He's like a Smurf. 338 00:16:56,349 --> 00:16:59,249 (laughs) Yeah. 339 00:16:59,318 --> 00:17:02,586 Alex... I love Zifka, too. 340 00:17:02,655 --> 00:17:03,721 (laughs) 341 00:17:04,824 --> 00:17:06,189 Why are you laughing? 342 00:17:06,258 --> 00:17:07,525 "I love Zifka." 343 00:17:07,594 --> 00:17:09,327 I mean, the sound of it. 344 00:17:09,396 --> 00:17:11,062 You can't possibly be serious. 345 00:17:11,131 --> 00:17:12,596 "I love Zifka"... That's like saying, 346 00:17:12,665 --> 00:17:14,398 "I love Bomba." 347 00:17:14,467 --> 00:17:16,334 "I love Cheetah." 348 00:17:16,402 --> 00:17:18,369 Doesn't he have a last name? 349 00:17:18,438 --> 00:17:20,204 What does his last name matter? 350 00:17:20,273 --> 00:17:22,340 I, uh... I'm telling you, 351 00:17:22,409 --> 00:17:24,875 this is the fullest relationship I've had in a long time. 352 00:17:24,944 --> 00:17:26,177 Fullest relationship? 353 00:17:26,246 --> 00:17:27,645 Oh, come on, Elaine. 354 00:17:27,714 --> 00:17:30,247 You may not have thought of this, but... 355 00:17:30,316 --> 00:17:32,549 in a full relationship, 356 00:17:32,618 --> 00:17:36,587 physical compatibility is very important. 357 00:17:36,656 --> 00:17:37,721 So? 358 00:17:37,790 --> 00:17:41,658 So, he's been celibate for ten years. 359 00:17:41,727 --> 00:17:43,260 So? 360 00:17:43,329 --> 00:17:46,030 So... 361 00:17:46,098 --> 00:17:50,134 he may find it difficult to be with a woman. 362 00:17:50,203 --> 00:17:51,435 No problem. 363 00:17:51,504 --> 00:17:53,638 No problem. 364 00:17:53,706 --> 00:17:55,506 Well, that's a relief. 365 00:17:55,575 --> 00:17:57,575 Alex, Zifka's wonderful. 366 00:17:57,644 --> 00:18:01,145 He's... he's physical and spiritual at the same time. 367 00:18:01,214 --> 00:18:02,813 Please. And... 368 00:18:02,882 --> 00:18:06,417 and you should see how shy he gets when I tell him that. 369 00:18:06,485 --> 00:18:07,584 You tell him those things? 370 00:18:07,653 --> 00:18:08,686 Yeah. 371 00:18:08,755 --> 00:18:09,887 Oh, Elaine... 372 00:18:09,955 --> 00:18:11,366 Elaine, this guy comes from another country. 373 00:18:11,390 --> 00:18:12,490 Don't you know that? 374 00:18:12,558 --> 00:18:14,659 I mean, he might... he might not understand 375 00:18:14,727 --> 00:18:16,060 that someone in New York... 376 00:18:16,129 --> 00:18:18,262 how they speak in New York, you know... 377 00:18:18,331 --> 00:18:21,198 people say things very easily and don't even mean them. 378 00:18:21,267 --> 00:18:23,033 Well, I don't say them easily, 379 00:18:23,102 --> 00:18:26,270 and I certainly mean every one of them. 380 00:18:26,338 --> 00:18:29,507 Alex, in the purest sense of the word, 381 00:18:29,576 --> 00:18:32,443 this has been the most romantic week of my life. 382 00:18:32,511 --> 00:18:35,246 Oh... (blows raspberry) 383 00:18:35,314 --> 00:18:37,748 Well, obviously, the romance eludes you. 384 00:18:37,817 --> 00:18:39,127 Oh, wait a minute. Elaine, Elaine! 385 00:18:39,151 --> 00:18:40,996 You know, I was going to let you walk out that door 386 00:18:41,020 --> 00:18:43,854 without saying my piece, but you keep heaping it on. 387 00:18:43,923 --> 00:18:45,489 But at the point that I realize 388 00:18:45,558 --> 00:18:47,091 that you're toying with this guy, 389 00:18:47,159 --> 00:18:48,625 then somebody has to stop you. 390 00:18:48,694 --> 00:18:51,629 Don't tell me I toyed with him. 391 00:18:51,698 --> 00:18:53,898 I don't toy with monks. 392 00:18:53,966 --> 00:18:56,500 You know, that's a terrible thing to say to somebody... 393 00:18:56,569 --> 00:18:57,501 That they toyed with a monk. 394 00:18:57,569 --> 00:18:58,747 Yeah, all-all right. Look, I'm sorry. 395 00:18:58,771 --> 00:18:59,903 I'm sorry. I... 396 00:18:59,972 --> 00:19:01,138 All right, maybe I'm wrong. 397 00:19:01,207 --> 00:19:03,340 Elaine, now, come on. Don't be mad at me! 398 00:19:04,444 --> 00:19:06,310 Ah... 399 00:19:09,415 --> 00:19:11,114 (sighs) 400 00:19:12,218 --> 00:19:14,118 I'm not mad at you. 401 00:19:15,588 --> 00:19:17,355 (sighs) 402 00:19:17,423 --> 00:19:18,822 How could I be mad at you? 403 00:19:18,891 --> 00:19:19,924 (grunts) 404 00:19:19,992 --> 00:19:20,992 You're just jealous 405 00:19:21,060 --> 00:19:22,826 that you have no love in your life. 406 00:19:37,476 --> 00:19:39,343 (knock at door) 407 00:19:39,412 --> 00:19:41,378 Oh! 408 00:19:41,447 --> 00:19:42,646 Where have you been? 409 00:19:42,715 --> 00:19:43,880 Our last night together. 410 00:19:43,949 --> 00:19:44,882 Time is almost up. 411 00:19:44,950 --> 00:19:46,116 I can't believe it. 412 00:19:46,185 --> 00:19:48,886 I made you vegetarian lasagne and everything. 413 00:19:48,955 --> 00:19:50,587 Elaine, I got lost. 414 00:19:50,656 --> 00:19:53,024 I took the wrong subway. 415 00:19:53,092 --> 00:19:55,926 We only have a minute, 40 seconds left 416 00:19:55,995 --> 00:19:58,229 before I have to be silent again. 417 00:19:58,297 --> 00:19:59,930 Oh, there's so much to do. 418 00:19:59,999 --> 00:20:02,066 I-I-I don't know what to do first. 419 00:20:02,135 --> 00:20:03,901 Kiss me. 420 00:20:05,805 --> 00:20:07,972 Now, eat some lasagne. 421 00:20:09,542 --> 00:20:10,774 (sighs) 422 00:20:10,843 --> 00:20:11,776 Mmm. It's good? 423 00:20:11,844 --> 00:20:12,844 Mmm! 424 00:20:14,914 --> 00:20:16,313 Isn't life crazy, Elaine? 425 00:20:16,382 --> 00:20:18,883 You know, one minute, 426 00:20:18,952 --> 00:20:21,919 you're in New York kissing a beautiful girl, 427 00:20:21,988 --> 00:20:23,420 and then the next, 428 00:20:23,489 --> 00:20:26,424 back at the abbey rolling cheese balls. 429 00:20:27,827 --> 00:20:29,960 Oh, it's so frustrating. 430 00:20:30,029 --> 00:20:32,696 Elaine, I was looking forward to this entire evening 431 00:20:32,765 --> 00:20:35,299 to tell you of my feelings for you. 432 00:20:35,368 --> 00:20:36,800 Uh... there's so much to say. 433 00:20:36,869 --> 00:20:39,069 I don't know how I can say it all now. Shh. 434 00:20:39,138 --> 00:20:40,638 You don't have to say anything. No! 435 00:20:40,706 --> 00:20:42,272 No, I do. Elaine, you... 436 00:20:42,341 --> 00:20:45,709 you don't know how important this is to me. 437 00:20:45,778 --> 00:20:47,811 You know, it's not very often 438 00:20:47,880 --> 00:20:50,748 (watch alarm beeping) that it happens that... when... 439 00:20:56,955 --> 00:20:58,588 Oh, no. 440 00:20:59,992 --> 00:21:03,060 No, no, no. 441 00:21:06,398 --> 00:21:08,499 (sighs) 442 00:21:14,407 --> 00:21:16,473 Can you at least stick around? 443 00:21:16,542 --> 00:21:19,409 Lots of couples don't talk to each other. 444 00:21:20,646 --> 00:21:22,413 I'm sorry. 445 00:21:22,482 --> 00:21:25,516 I'm sorry; I didn't mean to make you smile. 446 00:21:29,488 --> 00:21:31,888 This is so frustrating! 447 00:21:36,162 --> 00:21:38,495 Zifka, you're great. 448 00:21:40,600 --> 00:21:42,166 (sighs) 449 00:21:42,235 --> 00:21:44,068 And don't... don't worry 450 00:21:44,136 --> 00:21:46,270 about not being able to tell me anything. 451 00:21:47,673 --> 00:21:50,141 What we had was so special. 452 00:21:53,379 --> 00:21:55,145 (sighs) 453 00:21:55,214 --> 00:21:58,114 Well, there's no easy way to do this, huh? 454 00:22:09,562 --> 00:22:11,729 So, here's to us. 455 00:22:26,913 --> 00:22:28,612 Bye, Zifka. 456 00:22:36,889 --> 00:22:40,725 (piano gently playing "Cheek to Cheek") 457 00:23:05,250 --> 00:23:06,250 (song ends) 458 00:23:16,428 --> 00:23:20,064 (theme song playing) 459 00:23:40,920 --> 00:23:42,620 WOMAN: Good night, Mr. Walters! 460 00:23:42,688 --> 00:23:43,787 (man grumbling) 31201

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