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Previously on "Girlfriend's
Guide to Divorce... "
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In the spirit of radical honesty,
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I am dedicated to truth from here on in.
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Becca is pregnant.
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I try to fix everybody else's stuff
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cause I don't have the
first clue to fix my own.
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These belong Zooey.
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She's gonna visit Frumpkis
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and the Wicked Witch of the South.
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I'm going to hate being
with Dad and the fat head.
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How do you know Dr. Harris?
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He's like an Oprah doctor.
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Today, I find out
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that he knocked up his ex-girlfriend.
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Good, I'm glad he finally
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manned up and told you.
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How long have you known Becca was pregnant?
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About a month.
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That is a huge omission.
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Okay fine, it's my fault.
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It kind of is.
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_
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[somber music]
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[exhales]
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So...
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Right?
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Yeah.
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Right.
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[tape rewinding]
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Lilly, will you please go get your brother?
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You're late.
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- Charlie, we're late!
- _
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That's not what I asked you to do.
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Can you please go upstairs and get him?
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Hi, sweetie.
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Hi.
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Hello.
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I should've told you about Becca
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as soon as I knew.
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I am so sorry.
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It's just old Jake.
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Bad Jake.
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Not bad.
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No bad.
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A little bit.
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I just, um...
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Look, I said some horrible things too
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and, ah... I was upset, I
could be very cutting.
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No, no, I'm apologizing.
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I am sorry.
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I was wrong.
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And you accepted my apology
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and let's not...
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Spend an hour revisiting
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all the awful things we said to each other.
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Yeah, that.
Let's not do that one.
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- We could make out instead.
- That I like.
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Mama, Mama, Mama, Mama!
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Wow! Oh, my God, Charlie, slow down!
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My butt is so itchy.
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Hi, Dad!
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Hi, itchy butt.
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Go to the car please, I'll be right out.
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What about my butt?
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We'll get to it.
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- Hurry!
- Nobody cares about your butt.
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Um, hey, I was thinking,
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before Latvia,
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maybe we should go up to that place in Ojai
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for a weekend.
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We can't fix this in a weekend.
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No, of course we can't,
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but look, I'm going to
Latvia for four months.
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You're gonna be going on glam dates
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and writing a book about divorce.
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The clock is ticking here, Abby.
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Even if I wanted to
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I have to work and you're prepping.
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Always gonna be something though, no!
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- Okay, hey!
- I want to go away with you.
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How about we hole up at home?
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No kids. All weekend.
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Oh.
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Why does that seem naughty to me?
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Because how many hours do you think
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we get to spend in this house without kids.
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I think zero, zero hours.
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- None hours.
- None hours.
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Great!
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And then we could, you know...
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- What? Oh.
- On the couch, in the pool,
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in the garage and...
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- Garage? Are you into that?
- Not that we... I...
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Not the garage, I'm just
riffing on that idea.
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You know what we do?
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We send the kids with Ford
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and Lilly can help him get the cousins.
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- And no phones...
- Yeah.
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Cause if something goes on with the kids,
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Ford can use the landline.
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It's old school, it's analog.
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I like it.
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Analog!
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Good.
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Oh, got to take the kids.
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Quickie in the garage?
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- No.
- Kidding.
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- [laughs]
- Okay.
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- Okay.
- Tonight?
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Tonight!
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I'm so excited.
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Can't wait, I love you.
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[whispers] I love you.
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[upbeat music]
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-- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe --
-- www.addic7ed.com --
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Oh no, no, no, this is cute.
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Right?
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This is really, really cute here.
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Oh, my gosh, hi!
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Hello.
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Marria, this is Delia, my former divorce
attorney and current good friend.
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- Hello, nice to meet you.
- Hello.
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This is Marria, we were models
and were roommates in Milan.
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I thought I recognized your face.
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Beauty.
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I know, she actually kept working
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and got really good gigs.
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For a minute.
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Now, I'm lucky if I book
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the mom in a J. Crew catalog
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because I'm like,
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[whispers] 33.
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Shh.
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[all laughs]
136
00:04:20,634 --> 00:04:22,300
But that's why the Blue Robin campaign
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is so empowering.
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You have to do this with me, Phoebe.
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I got a call today,
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along with the beauty here,
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to maybe be in this year's
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all-natural gal campaign.
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The all-natural woman at any age ads?
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That's enormous!
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Right?
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So powerful, it's positive,
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raw, real, minimal makeup, no Photoshop.
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Terrifying.
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Come on, you look amazing.
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I don't know.
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My modeling years were
not the best memories.
152
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And these are test shots, right?
153
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So only one of us actually gets the job.
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Come on, it'll be fun.
155
00:04:52,833 --> 00:04:54,249
I'm with Marria, give it a shot.
156
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Anyway I got to run, I'm
going house hunting with Gordon
157
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Oh, that's fun.
158
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Enough of this wedding B.S.
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Let's just, get on the real life, right?
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Do it.
161
00:05:00,628 --> 00:05:01,628
We on for dinner?
162
00:05:01,653 --> 00:05:04,392
Oh yeah, you bet your fine ass we are.
163
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- See you later.
- Nice to meet you.
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00:05:05,428 --> 00:05:06,928
Nice to meet you too.
165
00:05:06,980 --> 00:05:08,513
So is the food good at least?
166
00:05:08,565 --> 00:05:11,349
Deep-fried NASCAR pickles or whatever.
167
00:05:11,351 --> 00:05:12,901
I can't wait to come home tomorrow.
168
00:05:12,936 --> 00:05:14,769
Charlene is the worst.
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I hate her.
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Oh, honey, I'm so sorry to hear that.
171
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How's the paradise place?
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It's great!
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It's like we work for IBM in the '80s.
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- Ew.
- Kidding.
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00:05:24,447 --> 00:05:25,447
It's fun.
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Ping-pong and a swimming pool,
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00:05:26,833 --> 00:05:30,001
and Uncle Jake lives in
one of the lesser areas.
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00:05:30,036 --> 00:05:31,920
It's like the Paradiso ghetto.
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00:05:31,955 --> 00:05:33,371
I thought you hate Uncle Jake.
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No it's good to keep your
enemies where you can see them,
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my little southern belle.
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Well, I can see mine perfectly.
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Ugh.
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Hang in there, okay?
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You're almost home.
186
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I love you.
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[upbeat music]
188
00:05:53,417 --> 00:05:54,583
And here's your perfect kitchen.
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Don't look at me, sweetie.
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It's perfect for my chef.
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Oh yes. of course.
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Nice, nice home office for you.
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00:06:04,806 --> 00:06:05,772
Do we like?
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We love.
195
00:06:08,964 --> 00:06:11,598
Now, this is the 19th century configuration
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00:06:11,828 --> 00:06:13,161
of bedroom for each.
197
00:06:13,213 --> 00:06:14,220
Each what?
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Person.
199
00:06:15,889 --> 00:06:17,055
Oh.
200
00:06:17,217 --> 00:06:19,250
Huh, I didn't know that was a thing.
201
00:06:19,252 --> 00:06:20,314
Oh, yes.
202
00:06:20,339 --> 00:06:21,400
It's become popular. The...
203
00:06:21,425 --> 00:06:22,744
"Downton Abbey" style.
204
00:06:23,926 --> 00:06:25,426
But a lot of folks prefer the single.
205
00:06:25,451 --> 00:06:26,950
No, I... I kind of love it.
206
00:06:26,975 --> 00:06:27,974
I love the idea.
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00:06:27,999 --> 00:06:29,197
It's very regal.
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00:06:30,514 --> 00:06:34,216
You love separate bedrooms, really?
209
00:06:34,241 --> 00:06:35,824
Insomniac.
210
00:06:36,019 --> 00:06:38,019
Teeth grinder, duvet hogger.
211
00:06:38,044 --> 00:06:40,544
Oh, what about warts and all?
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00:06:40,569 --> 00:06:41,900
I don't know, I just...
213
00:06:42,531 --> 00:06:43,931
it seems kind of romantic.
214
00:06:44,916 --> 00:06:48,585
Or the opposite of romantic?
215
00:06:48,832 --> 00:06:50,448
It's nice to have the option, right?
216
00:06:50,473 --> 00:06:52,423
I think the bidets are African ivory.
217
00:06:52,845 --> 00:06:54,619
Maybe before poaching
was illegal of course.
218
00:06:54,644 --> 00:06:56,427
Too late now! Come see.
219
00:06:56,506 --> 00:06:59,457
[upbeat music]
220
00:06:59,509 --> 00:07:01,338
221
00:07:01,363 --> 00:07:02,713
Abby?
222
00:07:05,835 --> 00:07:07,001
Abs!
223
00:07:08,498 --> 00:07:10,248
Colder.
224
00:07:10,384 --> 00:07:11,717
Warmer.
225
00:07:12,394 --> 00:07:13,760
Warmer.
226
00:07:15,330 --> 00:07:17,080
Holy shit.
227
00:07:17,777 --> 00:07:19,060
Last one naked gets to do
228
00:07:19,112 --> 00:07:20,111
whatever the other one wants.
229
00:07:20,146 --> 00:07:21,229
That's a win-win.
230
00:07:21,281 --> 00:07:22,447
I know.
231
00:07:22,482 --> 00:07:25,450
[upbeat music]
232
00:07:25,475 --> 00:07:28,939
233
00:07:29,555 --> 00:07:31,555
That's the loudest sex we've ever had.
234
00:07:31,580 --> 00:07:32,529
Definitely.
235
00:07:32,581 --> 00:07:33,581
[giggles]
236
00:07:34,776 --> 00:07:35,724
Radical honesty.
237
00:07:35,777 --> 00:07:36,725
Oh, no.
238
00:07:36,778 --> 00:07:37,760
What?
239
00:07:37,795 --> 00:07:39,228
I would like my husband slash
240
00:07:39,280 --> 00:07:40,813
ex-husband to make me a drink.
241
00:07:40,865 --> 00:07:42,731
[chuckles] Oh, yeah?
242
00:07:42,733 --> 00:07:43,732
Yeah.
243
00:07:43,734 --> 00:07:45,067
Honesty.
244
00:07:45,069 --> 00:07:46,569
- That's right.
- Love it!
245
00:07:46,571 --> 00:07:47,653
You know seriously,
246
00:07:47,705 --> 00:07:49,705
I love the conversation
we had this morning.
247
00:07:49,740 --> 00:07:50,906
Yeah, me too.
248
00:07:50,908 --> 00:07:54,410
We apologized, we moved on, and...
249
00:07:54,462 --> 00:07:55,911
We didn't rehash every argument we've had
250
00:07:55,913 --> 00:07:56,912
for the last 20 years.
251
00:07:56,914 --> 00:07:57,913
Exactly.
252
00:07:57,915 --> 00:07:59,215
Radical honesty,
253
00:07:59,250 --> 00:08:00,583
and then we let it go.
254
00:08:00,635 --> 00:08:02,218
Let it go.
255
00:08:02,253 --> 00:08:03,586
No!
256
00:08:04,463 --> 00:08:05,962
Don't sing that song.
257
00:08:07,200 --> 00:08:08,166
Fine.
258
00:08:08,191 --> 00:08:09,407
You get my point?
259
00:08:09,432 --> 00:08:10,642
I do.
260
00:08:11,454 --> 00:08:13,002
Oh, what's in this?
261
00:08:13,027 --> 00:08:13,976
Good stuff.
262
00:08:14,232 --> 00:08:15,181
Radical honesty.
263
00:08:15,233 --> 00:08:16,150
Cheers.
264
00:08:17,077 --> 00:08:18,627
So were you in love with Nate?
265
00:08:21,155 --> 00:08:22,104
What?
266
00:08:22,129 --> 00:08:23,462
Okay, I'm letting it go.
267
00:08:23,487 --> 00:08:24,903
Most of it.
268
00:08:24,992 --> 00:08:26,442
But, you know, you told
me about the Will thing,
269
00:08:26,494 --> 00:08:28,777
and that somehow got me back to Nate
270
00:08:29,559 --> 00:08:31,290
and were you in love with Nate.
271
00:08:32,514 --> 00:08:34,013
Okay.
272
00:08:34,038 --> 00:08:35,871
No, I was not in love with Nate.
273
00:08:35,896 --> 00:08:37,479
It was not about that.
274
00:08:37,655 --> 00:08:39,288
I think I just needed someone
275
00:08:39,313 --> 00:08:40,806
to tell me I'm beautiful
276
00:08:40,831 --> 00:08:43,332
and funny, smart.
277
00:08:43,628 --> 00:08:45,752
I needed somebody to give me cookies.
278
00:08:45,919 --> 00:08:47,218
Some ego cookies.
279
00:08:47,759 --> 00:08:49,465
I wasn't giving out many of those.
280
00:08:49,517 --> 00:08:50,549
I'm sorry.
281
00:08:50,601 --> 00:08:51,634
Yeah, well,
282
00:08:51,636 --> 00:08:53,052
I do demand a lot of cookies.
283
00:08:53,104 --> 00:08:54,303
Indeed you do.
284
00:08:54,328 --> 00:08:56,495
Y'know I was little, I
cookie-starved myself...
285
00:08:56,557 --> 00:08:58,307
Yeah, I know. I'm sorry.
286
00:08:58,309 --> 00:09:00,476
- Mmm.
- I just think as time goes by
287
00:09:00,478 --> 00:09:02,645
eventually it's like
you can't see each other.
288
00:09:02,697 --> 00:09:03,729
Not the way other people do.
289
00:09:03,781 --> 00:09:04,892
Mm-hmm.
290
00:09:07,618 --> 00:09:08,900
Well, I see you now.
291
00:09:08,925 --> 00:09:09,958
What?
292
00:09:09,983 --> 00:09:11,349
[laughs]
293
00:09:11,706 --> 00:09:13,739
Yeah in fact, I would like...
294
00:09:13,791 --> 00:09:15,824
- Oh! [laughs]
- To see you lay all over...
295
00:09:15,826 --> 00:09:17,209
Oh, my God!
296
00:09:17,245 --> 00:09:18,994
Our dining room table.
297
00:09:18,996 --> 00:09:20,212
Whoa!
298
00:09:20,580 --> 00:09:22,798
[moaning]
299
00:09:22,833 --> 00:09:24,800
We're gonna about 30 seconds
300
00:09:24,835 --> 00:09:25,968
before you get all Hazmat-y
301
00:09:26,003 --> 00:09:27,169
and have to clean this table up.
302
00:09:27,171 --> 00:09:28,504
You have always underestimated
303
00:09:28,506 --> 00:09:29,889
my tolerance for disorder.
304
00:09:29,924 --> 00:09:31,173
Oh, I have?
305
00:09:31,198 --> 00:09:32,314
Yeah.
306
00:09:33,886 --> 00:09:35,052
So like
307
00:09:35,642 --> 00:09:37,455
if I...
308
00:09:39,967 --> 00:09:41,550
If I just
309
00:09:41,954 --> 00:09:43,320
dropped this egg on the floor,
310
00:09:43,345 --> 00:09:44,794
that'd be cool, you
wouldn't have to clean it up
311
00:09:44,819 --> 00:09:45,818
right away?
312
00:09:45,856 --> 00:09:47,494
It would be wasteful, but...
313
00:09:47,519 --> 00:09:49,185
I wouldn't...
314
00:09:50,118 --> 00:09:52,505
And one, two...
315
00:09:52,530 --> 00:09:53,696
You are so gonna get it.
316
00:09:53,698 --> 00:09:54,697
- Three.
- First of all,
317
00:09:54,699 --> 00:09:55,948
you left the refrigerator door open.
318
00:09:56,000 --> 00:09:56,949
Here we go, four.
319
00:09:57,001 --> 00:09:58,834
That is a wild waste of energy.
320
00:09:58,869 --> 00:10:00,369
Six, seven...
321
00:10:02,988 --> 00:10:05,606
Bam! [laughs]
322
00:10:05,631 --> 00:10:07,347
Not cleaning that up, baby.
323
00:10:07,461 --> 00:10:10,713
You are so dead.
324
00:10:10,765 --> 00:10:12,798
But it's true
325
00:10:12,850 --> 00:10:14,850
It works like magic
326
00:10:16,548 --> 00:10:18,831
It works like magic
327
00:10:18,856 --> 00:10:24,252
Only got one life, got one
life to live, live, live
328
00:10:26,230 --> 00:10:33,235
Whatever you want just
tell me I'll do it.
329
00:10:34,905 --> 00:10:38,657
It works like magic
330
00:10:38,709 --> 00:10:42,244
It works like magic
331
00:10:42,246 --> 00:10:46,048
It works like magic
332
00:10:46,083 --> 00:10:49,084
It works like magic
333
00:10:52,171 --> 00:10:53,757
[inhales deeply]
334
00:10:54,416 --> 00:10:56,416
[muttering]
335
00:11:01,200 --> 00:11:02,866
Oh, my God.
336
00:11:05,190 --> 00:11:06,323
When he seemed
337
00:11:06,348 --> 00:11:08,682
positively delighted
338
00:11:08,773 --> 00:11:10,366
at the thought of separate bedrooms.
339
00:11:10,391 --> 00:11:11,690
You said he had sleep problems.
340
00:11:11,715 --> 00:11:12,681
Mm-mm.
341
00:11:12,706 --> 00:11:14,540
He never had a problem with it before.
342
00:11:14,779 --> 00:11:16,245
What if he's that
doubting the whole things?
343
00:11:16,280 --> 00:11:18,497
No, did he demand separate bedrooms?
344
00:11:18,532 --> 00:11:19,615
Was he trying to start a fight?
345
00:11:19,617 --> 00:11:21,166
No, he said like it's nice to have
346
00:11:21,202 --> 00:11:22,202
the option or something.
347
00:11:22,253 --> 00:11:23,369
That's not cold feet,
348
00:11:23,421 --> 00:11:25,621
and I kind of get his point.
349
00:11:25,673 --> 00:11:26,673
What?
350
00:11:26,707 --> 00:11:28,424
Binge Netflix, fart with abandon,
351
00:11:28,459 --> 00:11:29,425
get your alone time.
352
00:11:29,450 --> 00:11:31,749
It really took me by surprise.
353
00:11:32,084 --> 00:11:33,918
No, I'm good.
354
00:11:33,943 --> 00:11:36,026
I have a photo shoot tomorrow.
355
00:11:36,183 --> 00:11:38,133
- You're kidding.
- No.
356
00:11:38,185 --> 00:11:40,386
Oh, my... I could've sworn
357
00:11:40,438 --> 00:11:42,638
that you were letting Marria down gently.
358
00:11:42,640 --> 00:11:44,640
This is probably going
to be the last chance
359
00:11:44,642 --> 00:11:45,974
I get to do this again.
360
00:11:46,027 --> 00:11:47,390
And you know after Marco,
361
00:11:48,457 --> 00:11:50,824
I'm kind of grateful to do something
362
00:11:50,849 --> 00:11:54,640
that might send some good
energy into to the universe.
363
00:11:54,706 --> 00:11:58,515
Mm, here's to sending some good energy.
364
00:11:59,216 --> 00:12:00,765
Good energy.
365
00:12:02,877 --> 00:12:04,877
[sports announcer shouting on TV]
366
00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:09,834
[crowd cheering]
367
00:12:10,026 --> 00:12:11,514
Mmm.
368
00:12:14,348 --> 00:12:15,348
Mm-hmm.
369
00:12:15,373 --> 00:12:17,218
Good morning Mrs. Clean.
370
00:12:17,957 --> 00:12:18,905
Mm-hmm.
371
00:12:18,930 --> 00:12:20,713
Good morning.
372
00:12:20,824 --> 00:12:22,907
Really, the sports already?
373
00:12:22,932 --> 00:12:25,817
Really with the scrubbing already?
374
00:12:25,933 --> 00:12:27,015
[laughs]
375
00:12:29,019 --> 00:12:30,352
I really don't want to watch.
376
00:12:30,354 --> 00:12:31,353
Oh, come on.
377
00:12:31,355 --> 00:12:33,322
Come watch it with me.
378
00:12:33,357 --> 00:12:35,240
You've never given it the time of day.
379
00:12:35,276 --> 00:12:38,360
You know that Phil Jackson
used to have his players
380
00:12:38,362 --> 00:12:39,361
practice without the ball.
381
00:12:39,363 --> 00:12:40,529
Oh, my God.
382
00:12:40,531 --> 00:12:41,997
No, no, cause it's about five people...
383
00:12:42,032 --> 00:12:44,249
- You sound like...
- Thinking with one mind.
384
00:12:44,285 --> 00:12:46,618
A pretentious guy, who's about
385
00:12:46,670 --> 00:12:49,338
to direct a film with Joseph Gordon Levitt.
386
00:12:49,373 --> 00:12:50,373
Oh, wait!
387
00:12:50,424 --> 00:12:52,624
Oh, come on.
388
00:12:52,676 --> 00:12:54,676
I'm serious.
389
00:12:54,712 --> 00:12:56,762
It's... you danced in college.
390
00:12:56,797 --> 00:12:57,880
Yeah. It's... come here.
391
00:12:57,882 --> 00:12:58,881
I'll show you.
392
00:12:58,883 --> 00:13:00,215
No, I am hungover
393
00:13:00,267 --> 00:13:01,383
and I need food and water.
394
00:13:01,385 --> 00:13:02,768
Uh-huh, you need this.
395
00:13:02,803 --> 00:13:04,887
This is the ball, right?
396
00:13:04,889 --> 00:13:06,555
You can't let me get it, right?
397
00:13:06,557 --> 00:13:07,556
Cause here I can get it,
398
00:13:07,558 --> 00:13:09,191
but here I can't get it.
399
00:13:09,226 --> 00:13:10,309
You got to use your butt.
400
00:13:10,361 --> 00:13:12,144
- My butt?
- Yeah you got to like dance.
401
00:13:12,196 --> 00:13:13,145
I will be away from... no.
402
00:13:13,197 --> 00:13:14,196
Keep it... let's see look, I get it.
403
00:13:14,231 --> 00:13:15,814
Oh, God!
404
00:13:15,839 --> 00:13:17,622
Ow!
405
00:13:17,647 --> 00:13:19,347
That didn't hurt.
406
00:13:20,404 --> 00:13:22,070
Now there's pretzels everywhere.
407
00:13:22,072 --> 00:13:24,490
I know that OCD carb nightmare!
408
00:13:24,542 --> 00:13:25,824
God, grow up!
409
00:13:25,876 --> 00:13:27,409
Oh, grow down!
410
00:13:28,913 --> 00:13:29,995
Grow down, Abby.
411
00:13:30,047 --> 00:13:31,046
I don't want to be tickled.
412
00:13:31,081 --> 00:13:32,047
Grow down, grow down, grow down.
413
00:13:32,082 --> 00:13:33,048
No really, stop.
414
00:13:33,083 --> 00:13:34,049
I don't want to be tickled.
415
00:13:34,084 --> 00:13:35,050
Stop!
416
00:13:35,085 --> 00:13:36,802
Oh, God! Jesus.
417
00:13:37,755 --> 00:13:38,755
You hit me in the face.
418
00:13:38,806 --> 00:13:39,838
I'm sorry.
419
00:13:39,890 --> 00:13:41,890
Can you just like relax for a minute.
420
00:13:41,926 --> 00:13:43,425
You're provoking me.
421
00:13:43,427 --> 00:13:44,426
I'm not provoking you.
422
00:13:44,428 --> 00:13:45,594
You clean the entire house
423
00:13:45,596 --> 00:13:47,429
when we talked about not cleaning the house.
424
00:13:50,468 --> 00:13:52,418
No, mm-mmm.
425
00:13:55,078 --> 00:13:56,027
No.
426
00:13:57,155 --> 00:13:59,162
No? And what is it Jake and Abby's
427
00:13:59,187 --> 00:14:00,943
greatest hits argument number seven?
428
00:14:00,945 --> 00:14:01,945
The cleaning argument?
429
00:14:01,996 --> 00:14:03,695
I don't want to have it, do you?
430
00:14:03,747 --> 00:14:05,030
Skip it, right?
431
00:14:05,082 --> 00:14:05,968
Let it go.
432
00:14:05,993 --> 00:14:08,160
I'm just... I'm gonna let it go.
433
00:14:11,026 --> 00:14:13,660
I think we're either
gonna save our marriage
434
00:14:13,712 --> 00:14:16,262
or we're gonna end up in a
mental institution together.
435
00:14:16,287 --> 00:14:17,920
Same difference.
436
00:14:17,945 --> 00:14:20,429
[rock music]
437
00:14:23,234 --> 00:14:24,607
Good morning.
438
00:14:24,632 --> 00:14:25,581
- Hi.
- Hi.
439
00:14:25,606 --> 00:14:26,638
Gordon texted.
440
00:14:26,781 --> 00:14:28,448
He's just running a bit late.
441
00:14:28,500 --> 00:14:29,449
No problem.
442
00:14:29,501 --> 00:14:30,616
It's probably brunch traffic.
443
00:14:30,618 --> 00:14:31,617
Is that a thing?
444
00:14:31,619 --> 00:14:32,618
I don't know.
445
00:14:32,620 --> 00:14:33,953
Anyways, no real time crunch here
446
00:14:33,955 --> 00:14:35,037
since we're only seeing the two houses.
447
00:14:35,090 --> 00:14:36,122
Oh, two.
448
00:14:36,124 --> 00:14:37,323
I thought that we were seeing four.
449
00:14:37,358 --> 00:14:39,008
Well, the ones on Roscomare and Samara
450
00:14:39,043 --> 00:14:40,126
have single master bedrooms
451
00:14:40,128 --> 00:14:41,711
and Mr. Beech's email said
452
00:14:41,763 --> 00:14:45,181
just the two master bedroom
configurations from now on.
453
00:14:45,216 --> 00:14:48,634
Oh right, no, I thought the
others... I think they're singles.
454
00:14:48,636 --> 00:14:50,019
And here's Mr. Beech!
455
00:14:50,054 --> 00:14:51,521
I think I have the door code.
456
00:14:51,556 --> 00:14:53,106
Mm-hmm.
457
00:14:58,696 --> 00:15:00,947
You and Courtney have,
uh, separate bedrooms?
458
00:15:00,982 --> 00:15:02,732
Uh, good morning to you too.
459
00:15:02,784 --> 00:15:04,400
We can take separate vacations.
460
00:15:04,452 --> 00:15:05,735
Come on.
461
00:15:05,787 --> 00:15:07,036
I just think the option is intriguing...
462
00:15:07,071 --> 00:15:09,372
The option to not sleep beside me.
463
00:15:09,397 --> 00:15:12,815
Okay, Chateau Du Beech et Banai awaits!
464
00:15:13,545 --> 00:15:15,161
Delia, love of my life,
465
00:15:15,213 --> 00:15:16,829
we are just exploring this thing.
466
00:15:16,881 --> 00:15:18,080
Exploring?
467
00:15:18,133 --> 00:15:19,882
You told Cyan.
468
00:15:19,918 --> 00:15:21,134
- Shawn.
- Whatever his name is.
469
00:15:21,169 --> 00:15:22,835
The only one to see
places with two masters,
470
00:15:22,887 --> 00:15:24,387
that's not exploring.
471
00:15:24,422 --> 00:15:25,588
That's deciding
472
00:15:25,640 --> 00:15:27,070
for both of us.
473
00:15:27,892 --> 00:15:29,976
Cyan, there better be two of everything.
474
00:15:30,011 --> 00:15:32,178
Two offices, two kitchens.
475
00:15:32,180 --> 00:15:33,327
So I take her through the whole thing,
476
00:15:33,352 --> 00:15:36,687
and afterwards Lilly thinks
about it for a second,
477
00:15:37,036 --> 00:15:41,155
and then she says, "Mom,
I'm pretty sure I'm not gonna
478
00:15:41,189 --> 00:15:43,573
"have sex until college, but when I do,
479
00:15:43,608 --> 00:15:45,992
"I promise I will call
you as soon as it's over."
480
00:15:46,027 --> 00:15:46,993
Aww.
481
00:15:47,028 --> 00:15:47,994
Our little girl.
482
00:15:48,029 --> 00:15:48,995
I know.
483
00:15:49,030 --> 00:15:50,196
And Charlie...
484
00:15:50,198 --> 00:15:51,914
Oh, Charlie's gonna
lose his virginity at 13.
485
00:15:51,950 --> 00:15:52,687
[laughs]
486
00:15:52,712 --> 00:15:53,795
Or 30.
487
00:15:54,202 --> 00:15:55,868
I can kinda see it
going either way for him.
488
00:15:55,920 --> 00:15:57,954
Agreed, I totally get that.
489
00:15:58,006 --> 00:16:00,423
Ah, so radical honesty...
490
00:16:00,458 --> 00:16:01,458
Go for it.
491
00:16:01,483 --> 00:16:04,184
When I think about the CW, baby.
492
00:16:05,597 --> 00:16:06,879
I just feel ripped off.
493
00:16:06,881 --> 00:16:09,348
I feel like we did the baby thing already.
494
00:16:09,384 --> 00:16:11,217
It was hard, I don't want to do it again.
495
00:16:11,269 --> 00:16:12,218
Yeah.
496
00:16:12,243 --> 00:16:13,993
Well radical honesty...
497
00:16:14,996 --> 00:16:16,898
You probably should've come on her tits.
498
00:16:18,309 --> 00:16:19,275
Right?
499
00:16:19,310 --> 00:16:20,560
Right.
500
00:16:20,612 --> 00:16:22,528
Like the CW baby is happening
501
00:16:22,564 --> 00:16:23,613
and we can bitch about it
502
00:16:23,648 --> 00:16:24,697
or we can embrace it.
503
00:16:24,732 --> 00:16:25,698
But if we're at our best,
504
00:16:25,733 --> 00:16:27,783
we can handle it.
505
00:16:27,819 --> 00:16:29,902
I mean, we can thrive even.
506
00:16:32,916 --> 00:16:34,115
Amazing.
507
00:16:34,140 --> 00:16:35,139
Thank you.
508
00:16:35,243 --> 00:16:36,609
[doorbell rings]
509
00:16:37,112 --> 00:16:39,112
[giggles]
510
00:16:39,137 --> 00:16:42,105
Oh, my baby!
511
00:16:42,130 --> 00:16:44,130
I missed you!
512
00:16:44,155 --> 00:16:45,454
Oh, I missed you too,
513
00:16:45,479 --> 00:16:46,444
but I can't breathe.
514
00:16:46,469 --> 00:16:47,634
Mmm.
515
00:16:47,659 --> 00:16:50,890
The latest delectable creations from Scott.
516
00:16:51,188 --> 00:16:53,188
Game changers.
517
00:16:53,213 --> 00:16:55,430
Not vegan.
518
00:16:55,455 --> 00:16:56,955
Oh, exciting.
519
00:16:56,980 --> 00:16:58,012
- Mm-hmm.
- Thank you.
520
00:16:58,037 --> 00:16:59,653
Okay now, dish it.
521
00:16:59,678 --> 00:17:01,095
How bad is it?
522
00:17:01,120 --> 00:17:03,921
Honestly, I don't think I
have the language skills.
523
00:17:03,946 --> 00:17:06,413
I don't think James Joyce
had the language skills.
524
00:17:06,438 --> 00:17:07,737
Really?
525
00:17:07,942 --> 00:17:09,942
Mom, while I'm fully aware
526
00:17:09,944 --> 00:17:11,327
of the self-sabotaging nature
527
00:17:11,362 --> 00:17:12,662
of woman on woman ridicule.
528
00:17:12,697 --> 00:17:14,497
- Mm-hmm.
- I must say this,
529
00:17:14,532 --> 00:17:16,532
she is a monster.
530
00:17:17,619 --> 00:17:19,085
I caught the monster part go on.
531
00:17:19,120 --> 00:17:20,786
She's dumb, she's mean, she's ignorant...
532
00:17:20,788 --> 00:17:21,921
Oh, whoa, whoa, mean how?
533
00:17:21,956 --> 00:17:22,922
Mean to you?
534
00:17:22,957 --> 00:17:23,957
Do I need to cut a bitch?
535
00:17:24,008 --> 00:17:26,259
The bitch was metaphorically cut.
536
00:17:26,284 --> 00:17:28,451
She even retreated to her parlor.
537
00:17:30,511 --> 00:17:32,261
I'm so proud of you.
538
00:17:32,410 --> 00:17:34,661
Please don't get into it
with Dad on this, okay?
539
00:17:34,686 --> 00:17:36,552
Mm-mm, no.
540
00:17:36,604 --> 00:17:39,138
Oh, munchkin, come here.
541
00:17:39,217 --> 00:17:41,584
I'm gonna wash up and unpack.
542
00:17:41,609 --> 00:17:42,929
Come keep me company?
543
00:17:43,167 --> 00:17:45,034
Nothing would make me happier.
544
00:17:45,167 --> 00:17:46,950
I'll be right in.
545
00:17:51,728 --> 00:17:53,228
- [giggles]
- _
546
00:17:53,710 --> 00:17:55,538
"Retreated to her parlor," huh.
547
00:17:55,573 --> 00:17:57,206
- Zooey's back.
- _
548
00:18:01,370 --> 00:18:02,905
[cell phone buzzes]
549
00:18:07,577 --> 00:18:09,051
[electronic music]
550
00:18:09,087 --> 00:18:11,202
_
551
00:18:13,641 --> 00:18:16,592
[upbeat music]
552
00:18:16,644 --> 00:18:17,677
553
00:18:17,679 --> 00:18:18,678
Can I just say,
554
00:18:18,680 --> 00:18:20,730
I had your June of '98 "Vogue" cover
555
00:18:20,765 --> 00:18:23,149
in my locker all of 7th grade.
556
00:18:23,184 --> 00:18:25,935
Oh, my God, that's cool, thanks.
557
00:18:25,987 --> 00:18:28,104
Hey, can you help out a second?
558
00:18:28,156 --> 00:18:29,077
Yeah.
559
00:18:29,117 --> 00:18:30,195
Thanks, Phoebe.
560
00:18:31,075 --> 00:18:32,241
- Carson.
- Mm-hmm?
561
00:18:32,276 --> 00:18:34,026
This girl, jowls, I'm not kidding.
562
00:18:34,028 --> 00:18:36,362
Can you tape them, try to
put a jaw line on her, okay?
563
00:18:36,364 --> 00:18:37,413
- Okay.
- Kind of in a hurry.
564
00:18:37,448 --> 00:18:38,497
Thanks.
565
00:18:40,182 --> 00:18:41,148
Tape them?
566
00:18:41,173 --> 00:18:42,866
What happened to all-natural?
567
00:18:44,122 --> 00:18:45,087
Jonas?
568
00:18:45,123 --> 00:18:46,088
Hey, I didn't know
569
00:18:46,124 --> 00:18:47,089
you we're gonna be here.
570
00:18:47,125 --> 00:18:48,791
- Phoebes, hey, honey.
- Hi.
571
00:18:48,843 --> 00:18:50,376
Sorry, I couldn't sleep last night.
572
00:18:50,401 --> 00:18:52,735
You can work some magic, right?
573
00:18:54,215 --> 00:18:55,548
I'm so puffy.
574
00:18:55,600 --> 00:18:57,466
No, stop it you're fine.
575
00:18:57,869 --> 00:18:59,536
Just breathe.
576
00:18:59,561 --> 00:19:01,060
Okay.
577
00:19:01,272 --> 00:19:02,452
I'm great.
578
00:19:02,630 --> 00:19:04,513
I didn't even want to
think what year it was.
579
00:19:04,538 --> 00:19:06,622
The last time the three of us
were in the same room together.
580
00:19:06,647 --> 00:19:07,946
I'm sorry, out of time, come on.
581
00:19:08,062 --> 00:19:09,028
Almost done.
582
00:19:09,063 --> 00:19:10,896
Sorry, I'm good, I'm good.
583
00:19:10,948 --> 00:19:13,065
I could do it, I could do it.
584
00:19:14,402 --> 00:19:15,735
It's gonna be fine, Marria.
585
00:19:15,787 --> 00:19:17,486
You won't regret this, I promise.
586
00:19:17,538 --> 00:19:18,571
I'm gonna be fine.
587
00:19:18,596 --> 00:19:19,523
Yeah.
588
00:19:23,378 --> 00:19:25,411
What does that mean?
589
00:19:25,463 --> 00:19:26,912
"You won't regret this."
590
00:19:26,964 --> 00:19:29,882
Oh, Alicia and I, the
producer, we're super tight.
591
00:19:29,917 --> 00:19:32,301
And she called me about this
and we started talking about
592
00:19:32,336 --> 00:19:33,469
what other girls might be good,
593
00:19:33,504 --> 00:19:36,088
and I totally pushed for you two.
594
00:19:36,113 --> 00:19:37,335
You didn't tell me that.
595
00:19:37,417 --> 00:19:39,641
- Well you're glad you're here, right?
- Yeah.
596
00:19:41,095 --> 00:19:42,171
How is Jonas?
597
00:19:43,406 --> 00:19:44,939
Alcoholic.
598
00:19:45,335 --> 00:19:47,433
She's been sober for a few months.
599
00:19:47,435 --> 00:19:49,602
Just trying to throw her a bone.
600
00:19:49,654 --> 00:19:51,937
You should have seen her
before I worked on her.
601
00:19:55,046 --> 00:19:58,097
I did see on the Twitter
that you're fake date
602
00:19:58,122 --> 00:20:00,138
with the real doctor was a disaster.
603
00:20:00,163 --> 00:20:01,445
Well, I did cry
604
00:20:01,582 --> 00:20:02,865
over you.
605
00:20:02,917 --> 00:20:04,033
If you must know.
606
00:20:04,085 --> 00:20:05,618
Sad, but what an awesome story.
607
00:20:05,670 --> 00:20:06,619
Go on.
608
00:20:06,671 --> 00:20:07,484
[giggles]
609
00:20:07,509 --> 00:20:08,891
How much longer do you have to
610
00:20:09,090 --> 00:20:10,289
do that kind of stuff.
611
00:20:10,291 --> 00:20:11,957
It's kind of bad for my ego cookies.
612
00:20:11,959 --> 00:20:13,843
I don't know.
613
00:20:13,878 --> 00:20:15,878
I do know it's hard.
614
00:20:15,930 --> 00:20:17,038
Thank you.
615
00:20:17,904 --> 00:20:19,036
But I mean...
616
00:20:20,468 --> 00:20:22,101
Soon you have to abdicate your role
617
00:20:22,136 --> 00:20:24,553
as the face of the divorce
industrial complex, right?
618
00:20:24,605 --> 00:20:25,554
Not necessarily.
619
00:20:25,606 --> 00:20:26,555
I am writing a book.
620
00:20:26,607 --> 00:20:27,607
Oh, I know.
621
00:20:27,642 --> 00:20:29,141
My parents read the press release.
622
00:20:29,193 --> 00:20:30,476
"I mean, your marriage failed.
623
00:20:30,478 --> 00:20:31,913
Do you have to announce it to the world?"
624
00:20:32,697 --> 00:20:34,577
Ugh, that's a good
alternate title for the book.
625
00:20:34,615 --> 00:20:35,781
[laughs]
626
00:20:35,817 --> 00:20:38,984
I'm sure your parents are glad
627
00:20:39,009 --> 00:20:41,877
that you finally ditched
the dead beat husband, right?
628
00:20:43,202 --> 00:20:44,374
I'm sorry.
629
00:20:44,408 --> 00:20:45,458
Jesus.
630
00:20:45,493 --> 00:20:47,243
They never gave you a real chance.
631
00:20:47,295 --> 00:20:50,162
And the truth is they have barely mentioned
632
00:20:50,164 --> 00:20:51,831
our split at all.
633
00:20:51,833 --> 00:20:52,998
Oh yeah, it's not about them.
634
00:20:53,000 --> 00:20:54,166
Why would they?
635
00:20:54,168 --> 00:20:55,584
Don't be mean.
636
00:20:55,636 --> 00:20:57,169
I'm not being mean, I'm being realistic.
637
00:20:57,221 --> 00:20:59,505
I mean, you and Max are their props.
638
00:20:59,507 --> 00:21:02,641
They want the image of
the perfectly happy family
639
00:21:02,677 --> 00:21:05,511
until something gets messy then... whoosh!
640
00:21:05,513 --> 00:21:07,513
They're ghosts! They're gone!
641
00:21:07,565 --> 00:21:08,647
That is not true.
642
00:21:08,683 --> 00:21:10,015
They raised us to be independent...
643
00:21:10,017 --> 00:21:11,851
Come on, they raised you to raise yourself.
644
00:21:11,853 --> 00:21:13,853
I mean, my mom may call three times a day,
645
00:21:13,905 --> 00:21:15,604
- Yeah, that does not mean...
- But she would anything for me.
646
00:21:15,656 --> 00:21:17,022
- That she...
- That means she's a parent!
647
00:21:17,074 --> 00:21:18,107
No!
648
00:21:18,159 --> 00:21:19,108
No.
649
00:21:19,160 --> 00:21:20,493
This is Jake and Abby,
650
00:21:20,528 --> 00:21:22,528
greatest hits number 19.
651
00:21:22,580 --> 00:21:24,413
You are 19 with a bullet in rising.
652
00:21:24,448 --> 00:21:25,414
Could we just?
653
00:21:25,449 --> 00:21:26,532
- Move on.
- Please.
654
00:21:26,534 --> 00:21:27,750
- Moving on!
- That number 19 is gone.
655
00:21:27,785 --> 00:21:29,034
I'm throwing it out.
656
00:21:29,086 --> 00:21:30,369
I don't even know what
you're talking about.
657
00:21:30,421 --> 00:21:31,787
What are you talking about?
658
00:21:36,624 --> 00:21:38,006
Yeah.
659
00:21:40,464 --> 00:21:41,714
Ah!
660
00:21:41,766 --> 00:21:43,682
Okay.
661
00:21:44,968 --> 00:21:46,218
I feel tense, do you feel tense?
662
00:21:46,220 --> 00:21:47,553
- Yeah, I feel a little tense.
- Yeah.
663
00:21:47,555 --> 00:21:49,305
But I still feel like
we're doing the right thing.
664
00:21:49,357 --> 00:21:50,806
You know, we're not going down old roads.
665
00:21:50,858 --> 00:21:52,024
- No, no, yeah, definitely.
- Dead-ends.
666
00:21:52,059 --> 00:21:53,025
- Definitely.
- Right?
667
00:21:53,060 --> 00:21:54,777
- Less talk more action.
- Yes!
668
00:21:54,812 --> 00:21:58,113
- We should...
- We could... make hot cocoa.
669
00:21:58,149 --> 00:21:59,865
Play a game of Hearts.
670
00:21:59,901 --> 00:22:01,483
Not exactly action...
671
00:22:01,536 --> 00:22:02,536
[laughs]
672
00:22:02,570 --> 00:22:03,536
If you want to go the mellow route,
673
00:22:03,571 --> 00:22:04,537
we could like
674
00:22:04,572 --> 00:22:05,621
binge watch "House of Cards."
675
00:22:05,656 --> 00:22:06,956
I've plowed through it already.
676
00:22:06,991 --> 00:22:07,957
- Okay.
- Sorry.
677
00:22:07,992 --> 00:22:08,958
We were separated.
678
00:22:08,993 --> 00:22:09,959
It's... yeah.
679
00:22:09,994 --> 00:22:11,043
I mean,
680
00:22:11,078 --> 00:22:12,244
we could just take a bunch of ecstasy,
681
00:22:12,296 --> 00:22:14,213
find the old dance mixes
and party all night.
682
00:22:14,248 --> 00:22:15,831
Oh, do you have molly?
683
00:22:15,883 --> 00:22:18,584
Molly... isn't that
the New Coke of ecstasy?
684
00:22:18,636 --> 00:22:20,135
Do you have it?
685
00:22:20,171 --> 00:22:21,337
No, I don't have any.
686
00:22:21,362 --> 00:22:23,896
Aww, sounds amazing.
687
00:22:25,092 --> 00:22:26,141
You know there is this guy
688
00:22:26,177 --> 00:22:28,761
at the the Paradiso
who says anytime I want,
689
00:22:28,813 --> 00:22:30,563
I could be back in like 40 minutes.
690
00:22:30,598 --> 00:22:31,538
Hurry up.
691
00:22:31,874 --> 00:22:33,482
[laughs]
692
00:22:33,517 --> 00:22:34,934
Kiss me first.
693
00:22:34,986 --> 00:22:36,936
Oh, my God. [laughs]
694
00:22:36,988 --> 00:22:37,988
All right, um,
695
00:22:38,022 --> 00:22:39,271
I'll text you when I get it.
696
00:22:39,273 --> 00:22:41,023
Okay, I'll find Charlie's glow sticks.
697
00:22:41,075 --> 00:22:42,608
Whoo!
698
00:22:42,610 --> 00:22:45,778
Zing, zing, zing, zing, zing, zing.
699
00:22:45,780 --> 00:22:48,077
[giggles]
700
00:22:57,484 --> 00:22:58,883
Novak, what?
701
00:22:58,919 --> 00:22:59,867
I need a quick favor.
702
00:23:00,039 --> 00:23:01,004
Is this a home invasion?
703
00:23:01,040 --> 00:23:02,005
Uh, no.
704
00:23:02,041 --> 00:23:03,006
Fine, if you could show me
705
00:23:03,042 --> 00:23:04,124
how to forward a text message.
706
00:23:04,126 --> 00:23:05,209
Okay, I'm looking for that guy.
707
00:23:05,261 --> 00:23:06,627
I think he lives in 3F...
708
00:23:06,629 --> 00:23:07,629
Stanny?
709
00:23:07,680 --> 00:23:08,629
Oh... it's pronounced "Staani".
710
00:23:08,681 --> 00:23:09,630
Stanni.
711
00:23:09,682 --> 00:23:10,631
- Like Yanni.
- Uh-huh.
712
00:23:10,683 --> 00:23:11,765
He's in jail.
713
00:23:11,801 --> 00:23:13,016
- Oh, shit.
- Yeah.
714
00:23:13,052 --> 00:23:14,017
Bummer.
715
00:23:14,053 --> 00:23:15,886
Forward texting, how?
716
00:23:15,938 --> 00:23:17,468
You just...
717
00:23:18,891 --> 00:23:20,307
Press it then you press contact.
718
00:23:20,359 --> 00:23:21,308
- Uh-huh.
- See?
719
00:23:21,360 --> 00:23:22,309
Is this Zooey's phone?
720
00:23:22,361 --> 00:23:23,310
Yeah.
721
00:23:23,362 --> 00:23:24,645
She tells me she hate Charlene, right?
722
00:23:24,647 --> 00:23:25,646
I check the phone,
723
00:23:25,648 --> 00:23:26,814
and they've been texting each other
724
00:23:26,866 --> 00:23:29,650
back and forth with, "I
miss you," "I miss you too,"
725
00:23:29,652 --> 00:23:31,118
"I can't wait to come back."
726
00:23:31,153 --> 00:23:32,653
[scoffs]
727
00:23:32,705 --> 00:23:34,371
It's horrible, right?
728
00:23:34,406 --> 00:23:36,857
Okay, you are, one,
spying on your daughter.
729
00:23:36,892 --> 00:23:38,208
And two, you're pissed
730
00:23:38,244 --> 00:23:39,209
that she's not miserable
731
00:23:39,245 --> 00:23:40,210
when she's with her father.
732
00:23:40,246 --> 00:23:41,462
She's lying to me.
733
00:23:41,497 --> 00:23:43,163
Well gosh, I wonder
how you would've reacted
734
00:23:43,215 --> 00:23:44,381
had she told you the truth.
735
00:23:44,406 --> 00:23:46,156
That would have gone great for her.
736
00:23:48,446 --> 00:23:50,023
Why are you in my apartment again?
737
00:23:52,712 --> 00:23:55,079
Do you have any ecstasy, extra molly?
738
00:23:55,670 --> 00:23:57,530
[laughs]
739
00:23:57,596 --> 00:23:59,179
Oh, my God.
740
00:23:59,231 --> 00:24:00,848
You two are hilarious.
741
00:24:00,900 --> 00:24:01,849
What do you mean "you two?"
742
00:24:01,901 --> 00:24:02,850
What does that mean?
743
00:24:02,902 --> 00:24:05,819
Oh, I know all about it, lover boy!
744
00:24:05,844 --> 00:24:07,009
You don't know anything.
745
00:24:07,072 --> 00:24:08,522
Let's see here.
746
00:24:08,937 --> 00:24:11,024
No ecstasy because I'm not 15.
747
00:24:11,026 --> 00:24:12,025
Okay.
748
00:24:12,050 --> 00:24:13,967
Now we've got... oh.
749
00:24:14,864 --> 00:24:17,831
Two Ambien, couple Zoloft,
750
00:24:17,867 --> 00:24:20,534
a Lipitor, and, um...
751
00:24:20,968 --> 00:24:23,420
Oh, what do you know.
752
00:24:23,455 --> 00:24:26,173
A Viagra-Frumpkis I found in my shoe.
753
00:24:26,320 --> 00:24:27,708
I'll take it all.
754
00:24:27,710 --> 00:24:28,959
Except the Viagra, thank you.
755
00:24:29,011 --> 00:24:30,544
Mm-hmm.
756
00:24:33,549 --> 00:24:34,882
Fine, just give it to me.
757
00:24:34,884 --> 00:24:36,049
Don't give me the look.
758
00:24:36,101 --> 00:24:38,051
Can I have a baggy or something please?
759
00:24:38,053 --> 00:24:41,388
So how's my... highly-wound friend doing?
760
00:24:41,440 --> 00:24:44,441
She's, um... good you know,
761
00:24:44,476 --> 00:24:45,893
we'll see, we're working on it.
762
00:24:45,945 --> 00:24:47,394
She misses you.
763
00:24:47,396 --> 00:24:50,452
I miss her too a lot.
764
00:24:51,199 --> 00:24:52,198
And if you tell her I told you that
765
00:24:52,223 --> 00:24:53,922
I will kill you.
766
00:24:54,069 --> 00:24:55,118
Get out.
767
00:24:55,143 --> 00:24:57,109
Gladly.
768
00:24:57,156 --> 00:25:00,123
[club music]
769
00:25:00,159 --> 00:25:02,459
770
00:25:02,494 --> 00:25:05,495
[phone ringing]
771
00:25:10,070 --> 00:25:12,968
_
772
00:25:21,821 --> 00:25:22,820
Hi.
773
00:25:22,845 --> 00:25:23,845
Hey.
774
00:25:23,983 --> 00:25:25,432
Pig tails?
775
00:25:25,434 --> 00:25:26,733
Interesting.
776
00:25:26,769 --> 00:25:27,985
Where are you?
777
00:25:28,020 --> 00:25:29,653
I'm just heading out to Soho House,
778
00:25:29,688 --> 00:25:30,988
Terry Gilliam's having a screening,
779
00:25:31,023 --> 00:25:31,989
"The Fisher King."
780
00:25:32,024 --> 00:25:33,273
You want to come?
781
00:25:33,275 --> 00:25:35,179
Um, last minute.
782
00:25:35,578 --> 00:25:36,777
I know I'm sorry,
783
00:25:36,779 --> 00:25:38,445
but I just found out I got a plus one.
784
00:25:38,447 --> 00:25:39,446
Is it too late?
785
00:25:39,448 --> 00:25:40,864
It is,
786
00:25:40,916 --> 00:25:42,616
but that sounds like fun.
787
00:25:42,618 --> 00:25:44,117
Look, one more question.
788
00:25:44,119 --> 00:25:45,335
Anything.
789
00:25:45,371 --> 00:25:47,421
Although it's impolitic to ask
790
00:25:47,456 --> 00:25:49,122
about your marital situation.
791
00:25:49,174 --> 00:25:50,265
What?
792
00:25:50,509 --> 00:25:52,426
If you want to do a follow-up piece,
793
00:25:52,461 --> 00:25:54,343
don't you need a follow-up date?
794
00:25:55,214 --> 00:25:56,679
Let me say this.
795
00:25:57,132 --> 00:25:59,800
I would like to follow-up.
796
00:25:59,802 --> 00:26:03,053
Good to hear.
797
00:26:03,105 --> 00:26:04,105
[chuckles]
798
00:26:04,139 --> 00:26:05,188
Until then.
799
00:26:05,278 --> 00:26:07,028
Okay, bye.
800
00:26:14,617 --> 00:26:18,437
[pop music]
801
00:26:18,462 --> 00:26:19,428
Gorgeous.
802
00:26:20,013 --> 00:26:21,249
Perfect
803
00:26:28,747 --> 00:26:30,964
It's good to be home, isn't it?
804
00:26:31,000 --> 00:26:32,299
Yeah.
805
00:26:34,470 --> 00:26:36,054
Phoebe, over here.
806
00:26:37,006 --> 00:26:40,590
Okay. Yeah.
807
00:26:40,643 --> 00:26:43,593
[club music]
808
00:26:43,646 --> 00:26:45,374
809
00:26:45,399 --> 00:26:46,632
Abby.
810
00:26:47,412 --> 00:26:48,778
Abs?
811
00:26:48,851 --> 00:26:50,350
Abby, where are you?
812
00:26:50,402 --> 00:26:52,085
Got some really lame drugs!
813
00:27:00,370 --> 00:27:03,070
- Good morning, you.
- Good morning.
814
00:27:04,533 --> 00:27:05,952
I feel asleep.
815
00:27:07,086 --> 00:27:08,535
No, you must have blacked out
816
00:27:08,587 --> 00:27:10,037
cause we... we rolled all night.
817
00:27:10,039 --> 00:27:11,121
We danced like maniacs.
818
00:27:11,173 --> 00:27:12,539
So you're going to be really tired.
819
00:27:12,591 --> 00:27:14,041
What's happening here?
820
00:27:14,093 --> 00:27:15,759
This dryer vent's been busted,
821
00:27:15,794 --> 00:27:17,711
and I'm just feeling
handy, and I miss being
822
00:27:17,713 --> 00:27:18,879
the man around the house.
823
00:27:18,931 --> 00:27:20,547
You missed attacking
824
00:27:20,549 --> 00:27:22,766
various inanimate objects and screaming?
825
00:27:22,801 --> 00:27:25,385
Maybe let's try the... new version of that.
826
00:27:25,387 --> 00:27:27,104
Where I'm calm and capable
827
00:27:27,139 --> 00:27:28,472
and you're supportive.
828
00:27:28,497 --> 00:27:29,366
Sorry.
829
00:27:30,225 --> 00:27:31,391
You're cute.
830
00:27:31,443 --> 00:27:32,943
You are capable.
831
00:27:32,978 --> 00:27:35,195
And this is... this looks beautiful.
832
00:27:35,230 --> 00:27:36,196
Thank you so much.
833
00:27:36,231 --> 00:27:37,397
You're welcome.
834
00:27:37,449 --> 00:27:38,732
You mad about my party fail?
835
00:27:38,784 --> 00:27:40,951
No, I'm exhausted anyway.
836
00:27:40,986 --> 00:27:41,952
[blows]
837
00:27:41,987 --> 00:27:42,953
Actually, couldn't even find
838
00:27:42,988 --> 00:27:43,954
that guy at the Paradiso,
839
00:27:43,989 --> 00:27:45,288
so I had to score stuff from Jo.
840
00:27:45,324 --> 00:27:47,040
- Hilarious.
- I know.
841
00:27:47,076 --> 00:27:48,458
What drugs did Jo have?
842
00:27:48,494 --> 00:27:50,460
Ambien, Zoloft, and Viagra.
843
00:27:50,496 --> 00:27:51,795
[laughs]
844
00:27:51,830 --> 00:27:53,747
So, we would have been sleepy,
845
00:27:53,772 --> 00:27:56,106
not depressed, and erect.
846
00:27:56,131 --> 00:27:57,430
Yeah, could've been a crazy night.
847
00:27:57,937 --> 00:27:59,653
It was a super cozy sleep though.
848
00:27:59,688 --> 00:28:01,671
- It was cozy.
- Hmm.
849
00:28:02,966 --> 00:28:04,382
How's Jo?
850
00:28:05,748 --> 00:28:07,414
Jo's batshit crazy.
851
00:28:07,513 --> 00:28:08,979
Whatever is going on
between the two of you,
852
00:28:09,014 --> 00:28:10,534
she seems like she wants to make peace.
853
00:28:10,566 --> 00:28:11,515
She misses you.
854
00:28:11,567 --> 00:28:13,900
Oh, peace sounds...
855
00:28:13,936 --> 00:28:15,102
complicated.
856
00:28:15,154 --> 00:28:16,937
I'm good.
857
00:28:16,989 --> 00:28:19,823
[upbeat music]
858
00:28:20,338 --> 00:28:23,339
[moaning]
859
00:28:25,614 --> 00:28:28,081
They want this every night.
860
00:28:28,117 --> 00:28:30,700
[moaning]
861
00:28:30,753 --> 00:28:32,786
Mr. Beech, Ms. Banai?
862
00:28:32,788 --> 00:28:34,121
Everything okay in there?
863
00:28:34,173 --> 00:28:35,539
Yes, you guess!
864
00:28:35,591 --> 00:28:37,457
In your shared bedroom.
865
00:28:37,459 --> 00:28:39,626
[both moaning]
866
00:28:47,318 --> 00:28:48,530
Hello?
867
00:28:49,075 --> 00:28:50,407
We'll take it!
868
00:28:50,432 --> 00:28:51,562
Wonderful!
869
00:28:52,691 --> 00:28:53,857
I'm here.
870
00:28:53,892 --> 00:28:55,642
Whenever.
871
00:29:02,034 --> 00:29:03,150
Fine.
872
00:29:03,152 --> 00:29:04,651
We go with the one bedroom.
873
00:29:04,703 --> 00:29:07,154
As long as you keep taking advantage of me.
874
00:29:07,179 --> 00:29:10,796
Oh, that makes me feel so good.
875
00:29:11,043 --> 00:29:13,405
You know, whenever
876
00:29:14,051 --> 00:29:15,718
I imagined being married,
877
00:29:15,743 --> 00:29:17,543
which was almost never,
878
00:29:17,666 --> 00:29:21,551
I did think about separate bedrooms,
879
00:29:21,587 --> 00:29:24,588
I mean, possibly as an idea but...
880
00:29:25,663 --> 00:29:27,132
When you brought it up,
881
00:29:28,015 --> 00:29:30,499
I decided, no way.
882
00:29:31,230 --> 00:29:33,346
I want my man close.
883
00:29:33,348 --> 00:29:35,460
It's funny how these things work, right?
884
00:29:39,571 --> 00:29:40,687
[romantic music]
885
00:29:40,739 --> 00:29:42,022
Wait a minute Gordon Beech,
886
00:29:42,074 --> 00:29:43,190
did you play me?
887
00:29:43,192 --> 00:29:44,991
You do have a certain consistencies
888
00:29:45,027 --> 00:29:45,992
of character.
889
00:29:46,028 --> 00:29:47,444
You played me!
890
00:29:47,496 --> 00:29:49,613
You mean you wanted one
bedroom the whole time?
891
00:29:49,665 --> 00:29:52,365
Well hey, relationships are negotiation.
892
00:29:52,417 --> 00:29:54,773
Yes, and you are just so... good.
893
00:29:55,370 --> 00:29:56,703
I know, I know.
894
00:29:56,705 --> 00:29:57,704
Yes.
895
00:29:57,706 --> 00:29:59,539
God damn it, I love you.
896
00:30:02,628 --> 00:30:03,593
And done.
897
00:30:03,629 --> 00:30:04,594
Yeah?
898
00:30:04,630 --> 00:30:05,595
Impressed?
899
00:30:05,631 --> 00:30:07,180
I am, thank you.
900
00:30:07,216 --> 00:30:08,351
You're welcome.
901
00:30:09,101 --> 00:30:11,101
What's that?
902
00:30:12,354 --> 00:30:15,138
Oh yeah, what is that?
903
00:30:15,190 --> 00:30:17,546
Oh, I don't know.
904
00:30:18,143 --> 00:30:19,359
Run inside and turn the dryer on
905
00:30:19,394 --> 00:30:20,265
maybe it's not important.
906
00:30:20,290 --> 00:30:21,374
It looks important.
907
00:30:21,813 --> 00:30:22,779
Well, how do you know?
908
00:30:22,814 --> 00:30:23,780
I'm the one who fixed it.
909
00:30:23,815 --> 00:30:25,866
Except it's not fixed.
910
00:30:25,901 --> 00:30:27,117
I'm just gonna...
911
00:30:27,152 --> 00:30:28,618
- Just give me a minute.
- I'm gonna YouTube it.
912
00:30:28,654 --> 00:30:29,870
- Are you kidding?
- Open my laptop.
913
00:30:29,905 --> 00:30:31,571
I'm not being overbearing.
914
00:30:31,623 --> 00:30:33,206
If you need help and I'm helping.
915
00:30:33,242 --> 00:30:34,242
It's just help.
916
00:30:34,293 --> 00:30:35,242
Well, that was quite a sentence.
917
00:30:35,294 --> 00:30:36,376
You're a writer, right?
918
00:30:36,411 --> 00:30:38,662
And you're a dryer repairman, right?
919
00:30:40,713 --> 00:30:42,379
Okay, taking a breath.
920
00:30:42,404 --> 00:30:43,486
Breathing.
921
00:30:43,511 --> 00:30:44,510
Breathing.
922
00:30:44,535 --> 00:30:46,327
Argh.
923
00:30:47,055 --> 00:30:48,004
Same team.
924
00:30:48,056 --> 00:30:49,056
Same team.
925
00:30:49,091 --> 00:30:50,056
- Yes.
- Okay.
926
00:30:50,092 --> 00:30:51,424
I think it will be a great idea
927
00:30:51,426 --> 00:30:52,592
if you went inside
928
00:30:52,644 --> 00:30:54,261
and use the Google machine
929
00:30:54,263 --> 00:30:55,312
and help me fix this.
930
00:30:55,347 --> 00:30:56,132
I shall.
931
00:30:56,157 --> 00:30:57,157
Thank you.
932
00:30:58,350 --> 00:31:00,100
Um, try...
933
00:31:00,102 --> 00:31:01,935
Strickland dryer vent weird piece
934
00:31:01,987 --> 00:31:03,320
or extra piece.
935
00:31:03,355 --> 00:31:05,021
- One sec.
- Okay.
936
00:31:09,444 --> 00:31:10,443
Shit!
937
00:31:10,445 --> 00:31:11,734
Hey, I just said one sec!
938
00:31:12,497 --> 00:31:14,497
Just look it up, please.
939
00:31:17,336 --> 00:31:19,869
No, don't Google it, Google... are you...
940
00:31:19,922 --> 00:31:21,755
You checking emails right now?
941
00:31:21,790 --> 00:31:23,707
I saw something from Barbara
942
00:31:23,759 --> 00:31:24,708
about an assignment
943
00:31:24,760 --> 00:31:25,709
and I was ignoring it
944
00:31:25,761 --> 00:31:26,760
so that we can have our weekend.
945
00:31:26,795 --> 00:31:27,794
Is trying to save your marriage
946
00:31:27,846 --> 00:31:29,452
getting the way of your divorce job?
947
00:31:30,098 --> 00:31:31,047
Wow.
948
00:31:31,099 --> 00:31:32,882
Yeah, here.
949
00:31:32,935 --> 00:31:34,601
Google it, please?
950
00:31:34,636 --> 00:31:36,019
No look, use Google Images...
951
00:31:36,054 --> 00:31:37,304
- Oh, my God!
- You're looking for an image.
952
00:31:37,306 --> 00:31:39,139
Would you please stop micromanaging me?
953
00:31:39,141 --> 00:31:40,523
- I haven't even started.
- Really?
954
00:31:40,559 --> 00:31:41,524
You're any further up my ass...
955
00:31:41,560 --> 00:31:42,943
- I could see out my mouth.
- Out of my mouth.
956
00:31:42,978 --> 00:31:44,894
Yeah, yes, you know how I knew
you were going to say that?
957
00:31:44,947 --> 00:31:47,814
Because you have said it an
incalculable number of times!
958
00:31:47,816 --> 00:31:49,149
Fix it yourself.
959
00:31:50,452 --> 00:31:51,651
What is your problem?
960
00:31:51,653 --> 00:31:53,320
You are so stubborn!
961
00:31:53,372 --> 00:31:55,488
Yeah, I'm stubborn if I ever
deigned to suggested that
962
00:31:55,490 --> 00:31:56,873
you're the one who maybe
did something wrong!
963
00:31:56,908 --> 00:31:58,124
I have no idea what you're talking about.
964
00:31:58,160 --> 00:31:59,125
I think you're going crazy.
965
00:31:59,161 --> 00:32:00,161
You know what?
966
00:32:00,212 --> 00:32:02,329
Radical honesty, you're making me crazy!
967
00:32:02,331 --> 00:32:03,747
You can't handle honesty, Jake.
968
00:32:03,799 --> 00:32:04,831
Of any kind!
969
00:32:04,833 --> 00:32:05,832
Radical or otherwise.
970
00:32:05,834 --> 00:32:07,155
I can handle it!
971
00:32:07,180 --> 00:32:08,180
Can you?
972
00:32:08,205 --> 00:32:09,882
Bring it on.
973
00:32:11,288 --> 00:32:12,842
They were work emails,
974
00:32:12,867 --> 00:32:13,999
or they were Harris emails.
975
00:32:14,035 --> 00:32:15,284
Would you even know the difference anymore?
976
00:32:15,319 --> 00:32:16,285
Why does it even matter?
977
00:32:16,320 --> 00:32:17,286
Why does it matter
978
00:32:17,321 --> 00:32:18,287
if you're lying to me?
979
00:32:18,322 --> 00:32:19,405
Like you lied about having a baby...
980
00:32:19,457 --> 00:32:20,739
No, no, don't change the subject.
981
00:32:20,741 --> 00:32:22,195
Answer the question.
982
00:32:23,297 --> 00:32:24,630
Fine, yes.
983
00:32:24,632 --> 00:32:26,632
I corresponded with Harris...
984
00:32:26,684 --> 00:32:29,718
- Corresponded!
- But only because all weekend,
985
00:32:29,770 --> 00:32:31,019
you've been picking on me...
986
00:32:31,055 --> 00:32:32,304
- All right.
- And making me feel like shit.
987
00:32:32,306 --> 00:32:33,555
This is my fault.
988
00:32:33,607 --> 00:32:35,307
First of all, I've not been picking on you,
989
00:32:35,309 --> 00:32:36,869
I've been trying to have a sense of fun,
990
00:32:36,894 --> 00:32:38,393
which I understand is not
exactly in your wheelhouse.
991
00:32:38,445 --> 00:32:39,394
This is what I'm talking about.
992
00:32:39,446 --> 00:32:40,395
You know what?
993
00:32:40,447 --> 00:32:41,530
If I do anything
994
00:32:41,565 --> 00:32:42,731
that's remotely corrected
995
00:32:42,783 --> 00:32:44,066
or remotely suggested,
996
00:32:44,118 --> 00:32:46,118
maybe you should just try to relax.
997
00:32:46,153 --> 00:32:47,819
You go to Defcon One.
998
00:32:47,821 --> 00:32:49,705
That's regular Defcon.
999
00:32:49,740 --> 00:32:51,290
No it... that's highest Defcon.
1000
00:32:51,325 --> 00:32:53,625
- No, it is not.
- Stop it, stop it!
1001
00:32:53,661 --> 00:32:54,876
Our problem is,
1002
00:32:54,912 --> 00:32:56,962
and always will be,
1003
00:32:56,997 --> 00:32:59,131
what you said before you believed.
1004
00:32:59,554 --> 00:33:00,916
It's my fault.
1005
00:33:01,077 --> 00:33:02,389
Everything.
1006
00:33:02,552 --> 00:33:03,796
All the time.
1007
00:33:05,851 --> 00:33:06,888
Not true.
1008
00:33:06,924 --> 00:33:07,655
True.
1009
00:33:07,680 --> 00:33:09,063
I'm just a monkey.
1010
00:33:09,343 --> 00:33:11,009
I just fling my poo
1011
00:33:11,011 --> 00:33:12,227
and make bad decisions
1012
00:33:12,263 --> 00:33:13,263
and make messes
1013
00:33:13,314 --> 00:33:14,680
and you're the put upon adult
1014
00:33:14,732 --> 00:33:16,848
who has to come in and save the day.
1015
00:33:16,900 --> 00:33:18,767
And poor you, because your stuck
1016
00:33:18,819 --> 00:33:20,185
with your monkey husband,
1017
00:33:20,187 --> 00:33:23,710
you have to go find solace in other men!
1018
00:33:24,085 --> 00:33:26,441
Harris replaced Will!
1019
00:33:26,493 --> 00:33:28,179
Replaced Nate!
1020
00:33:28,984 --> 00:33:31,363
Who replaced your monkey husband!
1021
00:33:31,415 --> 00:33:34,416
[somber music]
1022
00:33:36,086 --> 00:33:39,037
Because you make me feel like shit.
1023
00:33:39,039 --> 00:33:40,789
- Oh, my God.
- Come on, Jake.
1024
00:33:40,841 --> 00:33:42,046
Face it.
1025
00:33:43,127 --> 00:33:44,843
Who I am,
1026
00:33:44,878 --> 00:33:47,846
my neatness, my control,
1027
00:33:47,881 --> 00:33:49,131
my ambition.
1028
00:33:49,183 --> 00:33:50,716
You don't like me.
1029
00:33:50,718 --> 00:33:53,302
- Don't put it back on me.
- No, you don't.
1030
00:33:53,354 --> 00:33:54,936
You resent that I provide for this family.
1031
00:33:54,972 --> 00:33:56,054
- Oh, here we go.
- The more important thing...
1032
00:33:56,106 --> 00:33:58,056
- Money time!
- You have no respect
1033
00:33:58,058 --> 00:33:59,057
for my career...
1034
00:33:59,059 --> 00:34:00,275
- How did you figure that?
- Maybe if I...
1035
00:34:00,311 --> 00:34:02,728
gave a crap about stuff nobody cares about.
1036
00:34:02,730 --> 00:34:04,196
Joseph Gordon-Levitt cares about it.
1037
00:34:04,231 --> 00:34:06,231
And you just can't get over the fact
1038
00:34:06,233 --> 00:34:07,699
that I'm getting a movie made.
1039
00:34:07,735 --> 00:34:09,618
Your loser monkey husband
is getting something done.
1040
00:34:09,653 --> 00:34:10,619
You know what?
1041
00:34:10,654 --> 00:34:11,703
I have been nothing but supportive,
1042
00:34:11,739 --> 00:34:12,704
even you have admitted that.
1043
00:34:12,740 --> 00:34:13,905
I got retroactive diamonds...
1044
00:34:13,907 --> 00:34:14,990
- When, when?
- because of how supportive...
1045
00:34:15,042 --> 00:34:16,408
Yeah, well that was love goggles,
1046
00:34:16,410 --> 00:34:17,793
because you are not supportive
1047
00:34:17,828 --> 00:34:20,078
and you remind me on a daily basis
1048
00:34:20,130 --> 00:34:22,497
how much more functional and
reasonable you are than me.
1049
00:34:22,549 --> 00:34:23,498
Because I am.
1050
00:34:23,550 --> 00:34:25,917
No reasonable, functional adult
1051
00:34:25,919 --> 00:34:28,303
would have knocked up his 26-year-old...
1052
00:34:28,339 --> 00:34:29,304
- Oh, my God!
- actress rebound.
1053
00:34:29,340 --> 00:34:30,639
I pulled out.
1054
00:34:30,674 --> 00:34:32,891
- Oh, my God!
- It was an accident.
1055
00:34:32,926 --> 00:34:33,925
You pulled out?
1056
00:34:33,927 --> 00:34:34,926
Yes!
1057
00:34:34,928 --> 00:34:36,311
Spoken like a true monkey!
1058
00:34:36,347 --> 00:34:38,063
Do you have any idea what
you've done to our lives?
1059
00:34:38,098 --> 00:34:39,765
Spare me your self-righteous bullshit!
1060
00:34:39,767 --> 00:34:42,601
Monkey, monkey!
1061
00:34:42,603 --> 00:34:43,603
Stop that.
1062
00:34:43,654 --> 00:34:45,103
Monkey, monkey, monkey...
1063
00:34:45,105 --> 00:34:46,571
Shut this stupid mouth!
1064
00:34:46,607 --> 00:34:47,607
Shut up!
1065
00:34:48,609 --> 00:34:50,609
[phone ringing]
1066
00:34:55,165 --> 00:34:56,281
Hello?
1067
00:34:56,333 --> 00:34:58,166
Hey, Ford, how are the kids?
1068
00:34:58,202 --> 00:34:59,751
They're fine, okay.
1069
00:34:59,787 --> 00:35:01,420
No, um...
1070
00:35:01,455 --> 00:35:04,256
I'm sorry, I just ran in from outside.
1071
00:35:04,291 --> 00:35:06,875
Um, okay great, I'll see
you in a little while.
1072
00:35:06,927 --> 00:35:08,460
Uh, Charlie couldn't sleep.
1073
00:35:08,512 --> 00:35:10,545
He's terribly homesick,
1074
00:35:10,597 --> 00:35:13,465
so Ford is bringing them
back early and, ah...
1075
00:35:14,405 --> 00:35:16,238
He will be here soon.
1076
00:35:21,108 --> 00:35:23,308
I'll help you clean up this mess.
1077
00:35:23,310 --> 00:35:26,311
[somber music]
1078
00:35:26,313 --> 00:35:32,116
1079
00:35:34,321 --> 00:35:41,116
1080
00:35:47,769 --> 00:35:49,519
Hey, you.
1081
00:35:49,720 --> 00:35:50,969
Daddy!
1082
00:35:51,004 --> 00:35:51,970
Daddy just came over
1083
00:35:52,005 --> 00:35:53,054
to fix the dryer vent.
1084
00:35:53,090 --> 00:35:54,389
Yeah, I almost did it too.
1085
00:35:54,425 --> 00:35:55,507
Sweetheart.
1086
00:35:55,559 --> 00:35:56,842
I'm gonna head out, okay?
1087
00:35:56,844 --> 00:35:57,893
Cool.
1088
00:35:57,928 --> 00:35:59,344
Daddy, stay for dinner, please?
1089
00:35:59,379 --> 00:36:00,562
Oh buddy, dinner's not
like for like a few...
1090
00:36:00,597 --> 00:36:01,813
No, Daddy!
1091
00:36:01,849 --> 00:36:03,381
Mommy, make him stay!
1092
00:36:03,417 --> 00:36:05,765
Please don't let him leave.
1093
00:36:06,320 --> 00:36:07,486
It's okay, Jake. Stay.
1094
00:36:07,521 --> 00:36:08,904
I'll order some pizzas in a little bit.
1095
00:36:08,939 --> 00:36:10,355
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
1096
00:36:10,357 --> 00:36:12,441
Yes, yes, I will stay for dinner.
1097
00:36:12,493 --> 00:36:14,025
- Yeah!
- Ah!
1098
00:36:14,077 --> 00:36:16,828
- Yay!
- All right go up, go clean up.
1099
00:36:20,367 --> 00:36:22,534
All right, let's get in the works.
1100
00:36:22,536 --> 00:36:23,752
Uh, where's Jonas?
1101
00:36:23,787 --> 00:36:25,587
I don't know,
In-N-Out Burger?
1102
00:36:25,622 --> 00:36:27,205
I think she's drinking again.
1103
00:36:27,207 --> 00:36:29,791
So sad and so bloated.
1104
00:36:29,843 --> 00:36:31,426
She had like this panic attack
1105
00:36:31,462 --> 00:36:33,545
in makeup and it was just really sad.
1106
00:36:33,547 --> 00:36:36,631
Uh, no, I think she was
nervous and she wasn't drunk.
1107
00:36:36,683 --> 00:36:38,767
And that definitely wasn't a panic attack.
1108
00:36:38,802 --> 00:36:40,635
Whatever, she let herself go.
1109
00:36:40,687 --> 00:36:42,137
Let's get to work!
1110
00:36:42,189 --> 00:36:43,688
She looked real.
1111
00:36:43,713 --> 00:36:45,629
Like a real woman without tape.
1112
00:36:45,692 --> 00:36:47,359
I appreciate your opinion, Phoebe.
1113
00:36:47,394 --> 00:36:48,777
Oh wait, I don't.
1114
00:36:48,812 --> 00:36:51,396
Please, just go to makeup.
1115
00:36:53,066 --> 00:36:54,566
Bloated, Marria?
1116
00:36:54,568 --> 00:36:55,568
Really?
1117
00:36:55,619 --> 00:36:57,986
Look, Phoebes.
1118
00:36:58,038 --> 00:36:59,788
I know how this goes.
1119
00:36:59,823 --> 00:37:01,406
They test a couple of girls.
1120
00:37:01,408 --> 00:37:02,791
You don't know how it's gonna work out.
1121
00:37:02,826 --> 00:37:04,543
Portfolios lie.
1122
00:37:04,578 --> 00:37:07,078
Alicia asked me who I
liked from the old days,
1123
00:37:07,103 --> 00:37:09,304
so I stacked the deck a little.
1124
00:37:09,383 --> 00:37:11,917
You stacked the deck with Jonas?
1125
00:37:11,969 --> 00:37:13,585
You should be thanking me.
1126
00:37:13,637 --> 00:37:15,253
I knew she'd get cut
1127
00:37:15,305 --> 00:37:18,306
and now it's just between you and me.
1128
00:37:18,342 --> 00:37:19,937
Oh, my God.
1129
00:37:21,261 --> 00:37:22,594
What is wrong with you?
1130
00:37:22,859 --> 00:37:24,513
What, I forgot to screw my way
1131
00:37:24,565 --> 00:37:25,597
into millions of dollars,
1132
00:37:25,649 --> 00:37:27,679
so I could drink chai tea all day?
1133
00:37:28,382 --> 00:37:29,601
Wow.
1134
00:37:29,603 --> 00:37:31,736
So how are you gonna get me axed, huh?
1135
00:37:31,772 --> 00:37:34,022
What little lie were you gonna spread
1136
00:37:34,074 --> 00:37:35,273
about me?
1137
00:37:36,443 --> 00:37:37,776
I don't need this.
1138
00:37:37,828 --> 00:37:38,910
No.
1139
00:37:38,946 --> 00:37:40,078
You don't.
1140
00:37:40,284 --> 00:37:42,100
Aren't you lucky?
1141
00:37:44,284 --> 00:37:47,285
[somber music]
1142
00:37:47,287 --> 00:37:50,121
1143
00:37:50,123 --> 00:37:52,424
[man speaking on TV]
1144
00:37:52,459 --> 00:37:59,140
1145
00:38:22,851 --> 00:38:24,545
[exhales]
1146
00:38:25,946 --> 00:38:27,210
I should head out.
1147
00:38:27,327 --> 00:38:28,743
Uh, it's late.
1148
00:38:28,795 --> 00:38:29,795
Just stay.
1149
00:38:29,830 --> 00:38:30,879
I mean, we're both beat.
1150
00:38:30,914 --> 00:38:32,464
All right, thanks.
1151
00:38:32,732 --> 00:38:34,311
Where you going?
1152
00:38:34,843 --> 00:38:36,895
Uh, couch.
1153
00:38:37,232 --> 00:38:39,831
Just sneak out before they get up.
1154
00:38:40,336 --> 00:38:42,336
Like the bad old days.
1155
00:38:50,086 --> 00:38:53,037
[somber music]
1156
00:38:53,089 --> 00:39:00,878
1157
00:39:02,521 --> 00:39:04,187
Oh!
1158
00:39:10,523 --> 00:39:12,073
So...
1159
00:39:13,860 --> 00:39:15,026
Right.
1160
00:39:15,078 --> 00:39:16,773
Yeah.
1161
00:39:18,081 --> 00:39:19,062
Right.
1162
00:39:20,367 --> 00:39:22,200
So is Abby joining?
1163
00:39:22,202 --> 00:39:24,335
Uh, I texted her, I haven't...
I haven't heard back.
1164
00:39:24,371 --> 00:39:26,454
I give it a 50/50 chance she shows.
1165
00:39:26,506 --> 00:39:27,705
Wow, what does that mean?
1166
00:39:27,707 --> 00:39:28,790
[speaking foreign language]
1167
00:39:28,842 --> 00:39:30,091
I don't know what that means.
1168
00:39:30,126 --> 00:39:31,175
That means she's not telling.
1169
00:39:31,211 --> 00:39:32,844
- See.
- Hey, how was the shoot?
1170
00:39:32,879 --> 00:39:34,595
Yeah, Ms. Fancy Pants.
1171
00:39:34,631 --> 00:39:35,880
- I quit.
- Uh-oh.
1172
00:39:35,932 --> 00:39:36,932
What?
1173
00:39:37,171 --> 00:39:38,015
Really?
1174
00:39:38,051 --> 00:39:39,100
I know.
1175
00:39:39,135 --> 00:39:40,685
Um, I guess
1176
00:39:40,720 --> 00:39:42,019
I thought it would be an ego boost,
1177
00:39:42,055 --> 00:39:43,521
but it turns out that, ah...
1178
00:39:43,556 --> 00:39:45,106
beautiful girls are disposable.
1179
00:39:45,141 --> 00:39:47,024
Yeah, cutthroat doesn't even begin
1180
00:39:47,060 --> 00:39:48,025
to describe that world.
1181
00:39:48,061 --> 00:39:49,061
And now that I'm ancient,
1182
00:39:49,112 --> 00:39:50,144
it's a lot worse.
1183
00:39:50,312 --> 00:39:51,145
I know.
1184
00:39:51,197 --> 00:39:52,530
By the way, when they say,
1185
00:39:52,565 --> 00:39:54,282
"No Photoshop and no makeup,"
1186
00:39:54,317 --> 00:39:55,316
what they mean is they tape
1187
00:39:55,368 --> 00:39:56,484
and they moisturize the crap out of you
1188
00:39:56,536 --> 00:39:57,902
and then hit you with the
supernova of fill light.
1189
00:39:57,954 --> 00:39:58,903
I knew it.
1190
00:39:58,955 --> 00:39:59,904
Wow.
1191
00:39:59,956 --> 00:40:01,122
Think I need to find something
1192
00:40:01,157 --> 00:40:02,623
that makes me feel good about myself
1193
00:40:02,659 --> 00:40:03,624
for the right reasons.
1194
00:40:03,660 --> 00:40:04,742
Right on, lady, I get it.
1195
00:40:04,895 --> 00:40:07,046
What will that be?
1196
00:40:07,414 --> 00:40:08,796
That is the question.
1197
00:40:08,984 --> 00:40:10,214
I don't know.
1198
00:40:10,250 --> 00:40:11,749
I grew up really fast
1199
00:40:11,751 --> 00:40:12,750
and I skipped a lot of steps,
1200
00:40:12,752 --> 00:40:13,885
so I need to go back
1201
00:40:13,920 --> 00:40:15,136
and walk a little bit slower
1202
00:40:15,171 --> 00:40:16,220
and see what I see.
1203
00:40:16,256 --> 00:40:17,472
What is this an incantation,
1204
00:40:17,507 --> 00:40:18,973
are you about to turn me into a newt?
1205
00:40:19,008 --> 00:40:21,175
Well, that sounds good.
1206
00:40:21,227 --> 00:40:22,530
Thank you, Julia.
1207
00:40:22,555 --> 00:40:25,640
So what's the first step
you're gonna be stepping?
1208
00:40:25,899 --> 00:40:27,098
I don't know,
1209
00:40:27,150 --> 00:40:28,599
but as soon as I do know,
1210
00:40:28,651 --> 00:40:30,685
you two will be the first I tell.
1211
00:40:30,737 --> 00:40:32,570
- I love it.
- Newt, how about that?
1212
00:40:32,605 --> 00:40:33,771
- I can't wait.
- I can't wait.
1213
00:40:33,823 --> 00:40:35,990
Yay, jinx, buy me a Coke.
1214
00:40:36,025 --> 00:40:37,408
- I'm hungry.
- Yes.
1215
00:40:37,444 --> 00:40:39,610
- Are you hungry?
- Yes, I'm always hungry.
1216
00:40:39,612 --> 00:40:42,530
[soft pop music]
1217
00:40:42,582 --> 00:40:45,533
[footsteps]
1218
00:40:46,085 --> 00:40:52,089
1219
00:40:55,210 --> 00:40:56,511
You know I love you, right?
1220
00:40:57,171 --> 00:40:58,296
I do.
1221
00:40:59,997 --> 00:41:01,530
And I love you forever.
1222
00:41:04,551 --> 00:41:06,435
And we just can't fix it.
1223
00:41:07,690 --> 00:41:11,804
We are just these people together.
1224
00:41:14,614 --> 00:41:15,947
Are the kids gonna be okay?
1225
00:41:15,982 --> 00:41:17,698
Yeah, we'll make sure of it.
1226
00:41:19,931 --> 00:41:21,077
Okay.
1227
00:41:23,051 --> 00:41:25,719
We gave it a good second go, right?
1228
00:41:29,128 --> 00:41:30,249
We sure did.
1229
00:41:30,280 --> 00:41:31,780
[chuckles]
1230
00:41:32,165 --> 00:41:40,165
1231
00:41:40,173 --> 00:41:41,452
Jake.
1232
00:41:45,201 --> 00:41:47,008
I think my heart is breaking.
1233
00:41:47,647 --> 00:41:50,648
1234
00:41:55,039 --> 00:41:57,499
[both sobbing]
1235
00:42:06,694 --> 00:42:11,992
-- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe --
-- www.addic7ed.com --
1236
00:42:12,042 --> 00:42:16,592
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