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1
00:00:00,470 --> 00:00:03,949
They say technology is the
simpletons tipple of choice...
2
00:00:03,950 --> 00:00:07,245
...and Martin Moone was about
to get tech tipsy for the first time.
3
00:00:08,963 --> 00:00:12,213
to journey into, the Megaworld.
4
00:00:15,023 --> 00:00:18,037
The most advanced video
game system in the universe.
5
00:00:19,305 --> 00:00:20,751
Mega Drive!
6
00:00:21,196 --> 00:00:26,019
That, is the single greatest thing
my little eyes have ever witnessed.
7
00:00:26,451 --> 00:00:28,117
You're always saying that.
8
00:00:30,434 --> 00:00:34,316
That, is the single greatest thing
my little eyes have ever witnessed.
9
00:00:34,416 --> 00:00:35,569
Spanner.
10
00:00:36,091 --> 00:00:38,657
Imagine what it could do if
we didn't live in a bungalow.
11
00:00:41,082 --> 00:00:44,435
I meant it then,
and I mean it now.
12
00:00:44,436 --> 00:00:47,788
I got to get me one of
those magic machines.
13
00:00:47,789 --> 00:00:50,889
- Good morning my darling mother.
- Not a chance.
14
00:00:52,843 --> 00:00:55,706
- Hey there handsome man.
- How much is it?
15
00:00:55,806 --> 00:00:58,963
Can you put a price on the
happiness of your only son?
16
00:00:59,063 --> 00:01:00,681
Four pounds?
Is it more than four pounds?
17
00:01:00,781 --> 00:01:02,469
Dad, everyone is going to get one.
18
00:01:02,569 --> 00:01:06,898
That's what they said about
hovercrafts and star pants,
19
00:01:06,899 --> 00:01:09,642
and where are they now?
Mark my words Martin...
20
00:01:09,643 --> 00:01:11,775
this whole computer thing
is just a fad.
21
00:01:11,875 --> 00:01:13,245
- Star pants?
- Look,
22
00:01:13,345 --> 00:01:16,177
When I was young, I was happy
to play with a wheel and a stick.
23
00:01:16,277 --> 00:01:18,700
That was only exciting because
they had just invented the wheel.
24
00:01:19,528 --> 00:01:22,953
For the record, I would never
ridicule your silly old stories.
25
00:01:23,053 --> 00:01:26,783
Look Martin, we just can't afford
any new spangled stuff at the moment.
26
00:01:26,883 --> 00:01:29,429
Things are a bit slow at work and,
27
00:01:29,559 --> 00:01:33,707
- Ahh jezus, now me scrambled eggs are burnt!
- I told you to use the microwave.
28
00:01:33,807 --> 00:01:36,608
Microwaves!
Meka Drives! Who are we?
29
00:01:36,609 --> 00:01:39,058
The Moones or
the bloody Jetsons?
30
00:01:41,323 --> 00:01:44,527
Now that, is the single greatest thing
you little eyes have ever witnessed.
31
00:01:51,060 --> 00:01:53,870
♪ Dancing at the disco, bumper to bumper
32
00:01:54,180 --> 00:01:56,477
♪ Wait a minute, where's me jumper?
33
00:01:56,748 --> 00:01:57,619
♪ Where's me jumper?
34
00:01:57,619 --> 00:01:59,491
♪ Where's me jumper?
35
00:01:59,610 --> 00:02:00,762
♪ Where's me jumper?
36
00:02:01,011 --> 00:02:03,348
♪ Where's me jumper?
Oh, no ♪
37
00:02:05,686 --> 00:02:07,469
Oh Balls!
38
00:02:08,590 --> 00:02:11,849
How many times? You can't beat
an imaginary Conker buddy.
39
00:02:11,949 --> 00:02:13,000
We'll see about that.
40
00:02:15,313 --> 00:02:16,416
Spanner.
41
00:02:16,516 --> 00:02:18,450
Ahh Conkers, the poor
man's Disney World.
42
00:02:18,550 --> 00:02:20,905
I wonder if the Sega Mega Drive
has a Conkers game.
43
00:02:21,005 --> 00:02:23,589
Well, if it doesn't you can just
hit yourself with the controllers.
44
00:02:24,236 --> 00:02:25,957
- Hey, what's that?
- Where?
45
00:02:27,240 --> 00:02:29,112
- Oh, Feck!
- Oh, I see what you've done.
46
00:02:29,324 --> 00:02:31,734
That's a very fancy car for Boyle.
47
00:02:32,070 --> 00:02:34,321
Oh Yeah. Rich feckin golf clubbers.
48
00:02:34,722 --> 00:02:38,619
More cash, mirror and mahogany up there
than you can shake a silver stick at.
49
00:02:39,264 --> 00:02:40,804
Rich you say?
50
00:02:40,904 --> 00:02:43,554
Richer than B.A. Baracus'
brandy butter.
51
00:02:44,344 --> 00:02:46,247
Are you thinking
what I'm thinking?
52
00:02:47,348 --> 00:02:49,894
- Do you know how this works?
- Not a clue.
53
00:02:51,270 --> 00:02:54,067
- 29, 30...
- Not the teeth.
54
00:02:54,167 --> 00:02:55,238
What the hell are you doing?
55
00:02:55,338 --> 00:02:58,075
We're taking turns sitting on each
other to see who'll pass out first.
56
00:02:58,852 --> 00:03:01,553
Is this how you want to
spend your sunny Saturdays?
57
00:03:01,554 --> 00:03:03,905
Sitting on each other?
Why aren't you outside...
58
00:03:03,906 --> 00:03:05,709
...playing hide and seek or something?
59
00:03:05,809 --> 00:03:08,624
Hide and seek?
I'm 16 Dad.
60
00:03:09,596 --> 00:03:11,882
- I'll get it.
- 33, 34...
61
00:03:13,465 --> 00:03:15,223
Debra O'Connor.
62
00:03:15,911 --> 00:03:17,162
Hi Kevin.
63
00:03:17,262 --> 00:03:19,708
Oh, I said O'Connor didn't I,
which isn't right is it?
64
00:03:19,709 --> 00:03:22,193
- That's your maiden name, isn't it?
- That's right Kevin.
65
00:03:22,552 --> 00:03:24,436
Mmm, but that's how I know you best.
66
00:03:26,056 --> 00:03:30,053
Is Liam in? Seems the old
mortgage check bounced again.
67
00:03:30,153 --> 00:03:34,031
- Really? That's funny.
- Not funny Ha ha though, is it?
68
00:03:34,131 --> 00:03:38,445
No. And, I think Liam said he
is going out on a job I'm afraid.
69
00:03:38,735 --> 00:03:41,322
That's odd. His old
battered car is here.
70
00:03:42,171 --> 00:03:45,018
Maybe I should come in and
have a little nosey around.
71
00:03:45,118 --> 00:03:47,593
No, that's fine.
Sure I'll...I'll double check.
72
00:03:48,162 --> 00:03:49,473
- 45, 46...
- 45, 46...
73
00:03:49,510 --> 00:03:50,706
Liam!
74
00:03:50,806 --> 00:03:53,805
- Don't think I can take another body, Debs.
- The bank manager's outside.
75
00:03:54,088 --> 00:03:54,946
Jezus!
76
00:03:55,034 --> 00:03:57,531
- Ok, don't panic.
- It's the fourth time this year.
77
00:04:01,129 --> 00:04:04,560
You see? This would've been a brilliant
time to know a good hiding place.
78
00:04:06,730 --> 00:04:09,771
Do you know what we're starting
to call you down at the branch Liam?
79
00:04:10,751 --> 00:04:13,598
- Mr. Moone?
- The rubber bandit. Do you know why?
80
00:04:13,881 --> 00:04:16,313
- Because my checks...
- We're calling you the rubber bandit...
81
00:04:16,413 --> 00:04:18,346
...because your checks
keep bouncing Liam.
82
00:04:19,871 --> 00:04:23,414
Right, I'll I'll have it in to you
tomorrow, Wednesday by the latest.
83
00:04:23,514 --> 00:04:24,959
The very latest, Liam.
84
00:04:25,115 --> 00:04:27,193
Marvelous.
Alright.
85
00:04:27,194 --> 00:04:31,119
Tell Miss O'Connor I said,
farewell.
86
00:04:33,322 --> 00:04:38,104
Yeah, I'll pass that on to Mrs. Moone.
Mrs. Liam Moone.
87
00:04:38,921 --> 00:04:40,421
Oh, look at 'em Martin.
88
00:04:40,422 --> 00:04:43,877
With the toffee ears, and the
big silver spoons in their noses.
89
00:04:43,878 --> 00:04:46,909
I can smell the fake fancy
faux leather a mile off.
90
00:04:46,987 --> 00:04:48,364
That's money stink.
91
00:04:48,464 --> 00:04:49,860
Oh, look at this fella.
92
00:04:50,476 --> 00:04:54,869
I bet it was pheasant for breakfast,
and peasants for dinner with that flute.
93
00:04:54,969 --> 00:04:56,632
He probably had a light lunch as well.
94
00:04:56,676 --> 00:04:58,396
Here you go.
OK.
95
00:04:58,396 --> 00:05:00,898
You're Michael J. Fox in
the Secret of My Success.
96
00:05:01,318 --> 00:05:02,725
Can I help you?
97
00:05:02,825 --> 00:05:05,422
Good day young man.
I'm here for the employment.
98
00:05:06,093 --> 00:05:08,159
What was...
Have you seen the film?
99
00:05:08,944 --> 00:05:13,798
So, what previous employment
have you had Mr. Jetson?
100
00:05:15,297 --> 00:05:19,459
Paint stirring,
dish drying...
101
00:05:21,052 --> 00:05:23,343
- Architect.
- Architect. Right.
102
00:05:23,671 --> 00:05:25,789
- Architect.
- So what do you see yourself doing...
103
00:05:25,789 --> 00:05:26,381
...here?
104
00:05:28,399 --> 00:05:30,700
- Bunker boy?
- Yeah.
105
00:05:30,800 --> 00:05:32,215
Golf stick maker?
106
00:05:32,494 --> 00:05:34,301
- Brolly dolly?
- Brolly dolly.
107
00:05:35,151 --> 00:05:38,107
Tell you what, you go get
some lost balls we...
108
00:05:38,108 --> 00:05:40,855
...give you a few quid for them.
Huh, how bout that, huh?
109
00:05:42,797 --> 00:05:43,915
Yep.
110
00:05:45,279 --> 00:05:47,386
We have ourselves a deal, Sir.
111
00:05:48,454 --> 00:05:51,125
Just sit down.
Just sit down.
112
00:05:56,846 --> 00:05:59,510
Martin soon discovered
the life of the working man...
113
00:05:59,511 --> 00:06:01,254
...was far easier
than he could ever have imagined.
114
00:06:01,660 --> 00:06:05,460
Turns out that golf courses
are a virtual magnet for golf balls.
115
00:06:13,246 --> 00:06:15,745
I just know there's a
golf ball here somewhere.
116
00:06:15,845 --> 00:06:18,447
Yeah, keep diggin buddy.
Follow your ball nose.
117
00:06:21,907 --> 00:06:23,319
Hey, Padraic?
118
00:06:23,652 --> 00:06:27,210
What are you doing here?
I thought Golf was really expensive.
119
00:06:27,310 --> 00:06:29,222
Oh, it is.
But I have a specialty.
120
00:06:29,302 --> 00:06:32,425
- Oh, and what's that?
- I just don't tell them I'm here.
121
00:06:36,074 --> 00:06:39,928
Four!
Wait, back to the woods.
122
00:06:46,621 --> 00:06:49,381
- Where'd you get the cash Martin?
- Oh, I'm a working man now Dad.
123
00:06:49,481 --> 00:06:51,483
Work? What kind of work?
124
00:06:51,583 --> 00:06:55,465
Ball hunting, ball gathering,
I'm a golf ball ball boy.
125
00:06:55,565 --> 00:06:58,978
Golf?
Sure, that's not a real sport.
126
00:06:59,042 --> 00:07:02,189
Ah, here we go. Another
bloody hand ball tournament.
127
00:07:02,289 --> 00:07:04,567
It's the one true test of a man.
128
00:07:05,799 --> 00:07:07,643
Do you keep that in your pocket?
129
00:07:07,743 --> 00:07:11,581
Handball? But I thought
that was just a foul.
130
00:07:11,681 --> 00:07:13,552
Not a hand ball.
131
00:07:14,381 --> 00:07:16,098
Handball.
132
00:07:17,954 --> 00:07:20,587
What is this?
Are we playing it now?
133
00:07:20,665 --> 00:07:24,854
No. You play it in a concrete court.
Like a Thunderdome.
134
00:07:24,957 --> 00:07:27,957
- Or a squash court.
- Yeah, it's like squash...
135
00:07:27,962 --> 00:07:30,318
...except without those pansy racquets.
136
00:07:30,683 --> 00:07:34,335
It's kinda like a,
a bare knuckle squash.
137
00:07:34,435 --> 00:07:38,240
So, like squash for travelers?
138
00:07:38,457 --> 00:07:42,736
Exactly!
And I was the king of them all.
139
00:07:43,847 --> 00:07:46,421
The year was 1967.
140
00:07:47,034 --> 00:07:49,512
Twas the summer of sex,
drugs, rock and roll...
141
00:07:49,513 --> 00:07:51,432
...and handball.
142
00:07:52,679 --> 00:07:56,837
- But then a terrible...
- They're gone Love, they're gone.
143
00:07:58,839 --> 00:08:02,793
I've warned you not to close your
eyes when you're telling your stories.
144
00:08:03,367 --> 00:08:04,424
Yeah.
145
00:08:05,378 --> 00:08:08,625
Finally, our fun vegetable
of the week is...
146
00:08:09,281 --> 00:08:11,031
Oh God.
147
00:08:11,131 --> 00:08:12,114
Cabbage again?
148
00:08:12,214 --> 00:08:13,596
- Have we done cabbage?
- Yes.
149
00:08:14,211 --> 00:08:19,013
Well, It is a good one. There is
cabbage salad, cabbage risotto.
150
00:08:19,199 --> 00:08:21,374
Have fun with it.
See what you come up with.
151
00:08:21,474 --> 00:08:23,425
- Right. Same time next week yeah?
- Wait, hang on a sec.
152
00:08:23,525 --> 00:08:25,593
Actually, I've decided
to increase the intensity...
153
00:08:25,594 --> 00:08:26,917
...of the Weight Wishers schedule.
154
00:08:27,017 --> 00:08:30,762
So there's going to be another
class on Wednesdays and Fridays.
155
00:08:30,862 --> 00:08:34,115
- Oh that's so kind of you Debra.
- Um, No. The classes aren't free.
156
00:08:35,286 --> 00:08:39,124
Thrice in a week?
Isn't that a bit excessive, Debra?
157
00:08:39,224 --> 00:08:41,396
Well, so is your waist line Gerry.
158
00:08:42,890 --> 00:08:45,879
She works hard for the money
159
00:08:45,880 --> 00:08:48,687
so you better treat her right.
160
00:08:48,688 --> 00:08:49,688
Ball!
161
00:08:51,990 --> 00:08:55,347
Tweet, tweet, tweet.
162
00:08:55,625 --> 00:08:57,796
Huzzah!
Peasants for dinner!
163
00:08:57,896 --> 00:08:59,279
Ahh, right in the feathers.
164
00:08:59,298 --> 00:09:03,740
Martin! God, I'm sorry about that.
165
00:09:03,744 --> 00:09:06,575
Misjudged the yardage.
166
00:09:06,576 --> 00:09:07,744
Are you alright?
167
00:09:07,844 --> 00:09:11,428
No, I'm Martin Moone.
I haven't seen alright.
168
00:09:12,985 --> 00:09:14,996
Uh, was I just hit by lightning?
169
00:09:15,185 --> 00:09:17,466
Dumb caddy gave me
the wrong club.
170
00:09:17,467 --> 00:09:20,670
That's it! You and me are done
professionally. Get out of here!
171
00:09:20,957 --> 00:09:24,024
- Ah Dad, please!
-No Fiacra, you're fired!
172
00:09:25,522 --> 00:09:29,389
Listen ehh, lets say we keep
this to ourselves, Yeah?
173
00:09:29,390 --> 00:09:31,273
Here's a few pounds.
174
00:09:31,274 --> 00:09:34,343
- Have a rest and buy you some sweets.
- No time for rest.
175
00:09:34,344 --> 00:09:35,264
I'm a working man.
176
00:09:35,364 --> 00:09:37,135
Are you? It's work you want is it.
177
00:09:37,235 --> 00:09:41,008
Well I know of a caddy's position that's
just opened up. If you're interested?
178
00:09:41,083 --> 00:09:43,108
I was born to be interested!
179
00:09:43,194 --> 00:09:44,845
Well I'm glad that's settled then.
180
00:09:49,555 --> 00:09:53,865
Are you alright there young stripling? You
took quite the clatter on the cranium.
181
00:09:53,965 --> 00:09:55,184
Yeah I'm alright Sean.
182
00:09:55,457 --> 00:09:57,098
Splendid.
To the tee.
183
00:10:10,089 --> 00:10:14,266
Ahh, It's the rubber bandit. Here
to collect my new employee Liam?
184
00:10:14,651 --> 00:10:16,250
Great work today Marty.
185
00:10:16,251 --> 00:10:19,656
Good to see one of the Moones is making
some money, eh Liam?
186
00:10:19,756 --> 00:10:21,037
A nice few shillings.
187
00:10:21,136 --> 00:10:23,255
Martin, come here.
Your tea is ready.
188
00:10:23,256 --> 00:10:24,256
Come 'ere.
189
00:10:24,445 --> 00:10:27,014
Would you fancy a game yourself
some time Liam?
190
00:10:27,815 --> 00:10:29,540
- Heh, of Golf?
- Sorry.
191
00:10:29,678 --> 00:10:31,539
Do you not know how to play?
192
00:10:31,540 --> 00:10:33,908
I suppose it is a bit more
complicated than handball.
193
00:10:33,979 --> 00:10:36,427
Golf is barely even a sport.
194
00:10:36,427 --> 00:10:38,105
I could play it in my sleep.
195
00:10:38,105 --> 00:10:40,824
I'd be dressed the right way too.
In my pajamas
196
00:10:41,052 --> 00:10:43,584
Very good.
Shall we say Wednesday?
197
00:10:47,416 --> 00:10:49,094
We shall.
198
00:10:52,335 --> 00:10:53,958
- Wednesday.
- Wednesday.
199
00:10:55,341 --> 00:10:56,511
- Wednesday morning.
- Wednesday morning.
200
00:10:56,512 --> 00:10:58,852
Can't do Wednesday morning,
Wednesday afternoon.
201
00:10:59,421 --> 00:11:02,293
- This Wednesday afternoon?
- Wednesday a week.
202
00:11:02,823 --> 00:11:05,357
- This Wednesday a week?
- Wednesday the 16th.
203
00:11:05,457 --> 00:11:07,235
- In the afternoon?
- Yes Sir.
204
00:11:10,377 --> 00:11:12,962
That Kevin's a lovely man isn't he?
205
00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:15,610
Lovely? Are you joking?
206
00:11:15,611 --> 00:11:19,700
I'll tell you a little story about
Kevin "The Leech" Leech.
207
00:11:19,973 --> 00:11:22,089
The year was 1967.
208
00:11:22,756 --> 00:11:26,043
Twas the summer of sex, drugs,
rock 'n' roll and handball.
209
00:11:27,097 --> 00:11:30,115
I was the finest player
in all of Boyle.
210
00:11:30,240 --> 00:11:32,797
Leech was the second finest.
211
00:11:33,067 --> 00:11:34,766
We were rivals.
212
00:11:34,767 --> 00:11:36,324
In more ways than one.
213
00:11:38,167 --> 00:11:39,071
YEAH!
214
00:11:39,176 --> 00:11:41,678
That's some fine handball'n lads!
215
00:11:42,841 --> 00:11:47,001
Debra soon fell for my
handy charms.
216
00:11:48,355 --> 00:11:52,379
And when Leech saw us together
he flew into a jealous rage.
217
00:11:52,479 --> 00:11:55,848
I challenge you to a duel!
A handball duel!
218
00:11:56,297 --> 00:11:58,347
Duel excepted.
219
00:11:58,389 --> 00:12:01,485
Handball duel!
Handball duel!
220
00:12:01,890 --> 00:12:03,320
HANDBALL DUEL RULES:
221
00:12:03,321 --> 00:12:05,830
RULE ONE:
THROW BALL AT OTHER PERSON
222
00:12:05,951 --> 00:12:09,249
RULE TWO:
ACTUALLY... THAT'S IT
223
00:12:12,064 --> 00:12:13,672
- Strike.
- Bulls Eye.
224
00:12:13,772 --> 00:12:15,424
Your throw, Mr. Leech.
225
00:12:16,614 --> 00:12:20,027
But little did we know
Leech had swapped the ball...
226
00:12:20,028 --> 00:12:22,656
...for a ball
shaped rock...
227
00:12:22,657 --> 00:12:24,883
...that he'd spent three months
carving from solid granite.
228
00:12:24,983 --> 00:12:26,963
Why didn't I find a smaller rock?
229
00:12:35,054 --> 00:12:36,153
Liam!
230
00:12:36,224 --> 00:12:40,290
I broke my hand in nine places,
and three of my nails.
231
00:12:40,390 --> 00:12:44,471
- You're banned from handball!
- Fine. I'm gonna take up golf.
232
00:12:47,092 --> 00:12:50,045
And that was the end
of my handball career.
233
00:12:51,783 --> 00:12:55,365
So now, do you still
think he's lovely?
234
00:12:56,740 --> 00:12:58,128
WALKED HOME!
235
00:12:59,677 --> 00:13:01,630
Bloody eyes!
Open them!
236
00:13:04,092 --> 00:13:06,214
- How are ya Gerry?
- Liam-meister!
237
00:13:06,314 --> 00:13:08,542
- The Mooneatic. Come 'ere twee
- How are you?
238
00:13:08,616 --> 00:13:10,801
Great.
My god you smell good.
239
00:13:10,936 --> 00:13:12,833
Wish I could say the same Ger.
240
00:13:12,939 --> 00:13:16,973
Yeah, it's an awful stench isn't it? The
old cabbage carbonara is repeatin' on me.
241
00:13:16,986 --> 00:13:19,936
So listen, I was wondering if
I could borrow your golf clubs?
242
00:13:19,937 --> 00:13:22,900
I have a bit of a match coming up
and I can't really afford a set right now.
243
00:13:22,901 --> 00:13:23,901
Yeah, well...
244
00:13:23,952 --> 00:13:26,768
You know Liam, that I'd give 'em
to you in a heartbeat but...
245
00:13:26,769 --> 00:13:29,151
...my son's melted them down.
246
00:13:29,345 --> 00:13:30,953
Melted them down?
247
00:13:31,053 --> 00:13:34,336
To punish me. I changed the channel
while they were watching Airwolf.
248
00:13:35,431 --> 00:13:36,926
Hold on a second now.
249
00:13:36,927 --> 00:13:40,120
They did tell me to go and play
with these old kiddies clubs.
250
00:13:40,601 --> 00:13:44,333
"Go on away and play with these feckin kiddies
clubs you big fat baby." They said to me.
251
00:13:45,513 --> 00:13:47,745
You know sometimes I think
they don't respect me Li.
252
00:13:48,298 --> 00:13:49,747
You know what Gerry?
253
00:13:49,748 --> 00:13:53,442
They're only kiddie clubs,
when they're in kiddie hands.
254
00:13:55,971 --> 00:13:58,798
Or they're a standard
kiddie size, Liam.
255
00:14:01,251 --> 00:14:05,713
Wednesday Week
the 16th in the afternoon
256
00:14:07,241 --> 00:14:09,890
Let's see if the rubber bandit
snaps under pressure.
257
00:14:09,990 --> 00:14:11,475
This bandit is going
to rub you out.
258
00:14:11,575 --> 00:14:13,052
May Golf be with you.
259
00:14:17,344 --> 00:14:20,259
Forgot about that
old handball injury.
260
00:14:20,260 --> 00:14:21,828
Driver please Martin.
261
00:14:22,429 --> 00:14:24,164
Wipe her face old chap.
262
00:14:28,024 --> 00:14:31,865
Thar she blows!
Storming the greens like Normandy!
263
00:14:31,931 --> 00:14:34,946
Seriously?
That's your club?
264
00:14:34,947 --> 00:14:37,687
Oh how the mighty
handballer has fallen.
265
00:14:42,089 --> 00:14:45,070
You call that a driver?
Looks more like a drunk driver.
266
00:14:47,490 --> 00:14:48,852
I don't even need clubs.
267
00:14:48,853 --> 00:14:52,870
I could beat you by just throwing
this stupid little ball around.
268
00:14:52,925 --> 00:14:56,714
- Oh I would love to see that.
- Good. Cause your going to see it.
269
00:14:56,814 --> 00:14:58,336
Well I believe it's still your shot.
270
00:15:18,418 --> 00:15:21,521
That's not great Linda.
You've only lost a 3rd of a pound.
271
00:15:21,698 --> 00:15:23,351
What? You only weighed
me an hour ago.
272
00:15:23,875 --> 00:15:25,877
- It was longer than that.
- Hang on, no it wasn't.
273
00:15:25,977 --> 00:15:28,682
I feel like I just got off the scales
before you have me back on it again.
274
00:15:28,683 --> 00:15:30,917
Is this a Weight Wishers class
or a feckin step aerobics class?
275
00:15:31,017 --> 00:15:32,325
She's right. It's ridiculous.
276
00:15:32,425 --> 00:15:35,463
There's no time to argue. Your
next class starts in five minutes.
277
00:15:35,563 --> 00:15:36,585
Ah, Deb.
278
00:15:39,255 --> 00:15:41,012
This cult is becoming very expensive.
279
00:15:41,013 --> 00:15:43,387
This is not a cult,
this is a Weight Wishers class.
280
00:15:43,703 --> 00:15:47,201
This is not a cult,
it's a Weight Wishers class.
281
00:15:47,524 --> 00:15:48,706
Better.
282
00:16:13,001 --> 00:16:14,549
Good man Liam!
283
00:16:15,588 --> 00:16:18,615
- You a member here?
- I'm his caddy.
284
00:16:19,891 --> 00:16:21,477
I'll take that for you Liam.
285
00:16:21,577 --> 00:16:23,006
Thank you Padraic.
286
00:16:23,106 --> 00:16:24,159
Always glad to help.
287
00:16:24,959 --> 00:16:26,349
Glove.
288
00:16:27,217 --> 00:16:28,850
What do you think, Martin?
289
00:16:28,945 --> 00:16:33,809
You've got 120 to the hole, but
there's a squally wind a-blowin' west...
290
00:16:33,810 --> 00:16:37,669
...so I'd take a pitching wedge
and hit it with a lion's heart.
291
00:16:45,408 --> 00:16:46,866
What do you think Padraic?
292
00:16:47,514 --> 00:16:48,936
Just throw it.
293
00:16:49,999 --> 00:16:51,363
Yeah.
294
00:16:56,792 --> 00:16:58,091
Yes!
295
00:16:59,851 --> 00:17:01,191
Good man.
296
00:17:03,511 --> 00:17:07,698
You're two shots behind, Leech. I'd
be pretty embarrassed if I were you.
297
00:17:07,699 --> 00:17:10,119
And not just because
of those trousers.
298
00:17:13,786 --> 00:17:17,341
- It isn't over yet, Liam.
- Isn't it, Kevin?
299
00:17:21,692 --> 00:17:22,921
- Go on Liam!
300
00:17:31,349 --> 00:17:32,803
My hand!
301
00:17:33,811 --> 00:17:37,558
Did you trip over this ball shaped
rock Liam? How ironic.
302
00:17:37,595 --> 00:17:38,946
Leech.
303
00:17:41,441 --> 00:17:43,404
Actually, that is rather ironic.
304
00:17:43,405 --> 00:17:44,670
What should we do?
305
00:17:45,034 --> 00:17:46,391
Pint?
306
00:17:46,491 --> 00:17:50,036
Yeah. Let's call Gerry and
all go for a nice pint.
307
00:17:51,679 --> 00:17:53,981
Feels like we're doing
more and more classes...
308
00:17:53,982 --> 00:17:56,997
...but I don't feel like
we're losing any weight.
309
00:17:57,940 --> 00:18:00,627
Well, maybe if we didn't finish
every class with tea and cakes?
310
00:18:04,577 --> 00:18:08,269
Come on lads, you like your cake.
311
00:18:09,006 --> 00:18:11,978
The cake means she loves us.
312
00:18:13,418 --> 00:18:16,137
Jezus, I had better really
answer that hadn't I?
313
00:18:16,138 --> 00:18:18,069
No one ever called me on it before.
314
00:18:18,543 --> 00:18:20,263
Hello, Gerry Bonner.
315
00:18:21,445 --> 00:18:22,768
What?
316
00:18:23,867 --> 00:18:26,351
His hand? Liam is hurt.
317
00:18:26,789 --> 00:18:30,893
No, no, no, you read my mind.
Yeah. Get me Guinness.
318
00:18:41,505 --> 00:18:43,545
- How's he doing?
- Not well.
319
00:18:43,798 --> 00:18:46,635
If Leech makes this shot,
it's all over.
320
00:18:47,806 --> 00:18:50,327
Gwen!
This is still class.
321
00:18:51,152 --> 00:18:52,581
Ah!, Miss O'Connor.
322
00:18:53,006 --> 00:18:56,462
Nice of you to pop down
to witness my triumph.
323
00:18:57,347 --> 00:18:59,077
Club please, Martin.
324
00:18:59,309 --> 00:19:03,935
No Martin, don't be a brolly dolly.
Be a daddy caddy.
325
00:19:05,013 --> 00:19:06,802
This'n will bring it home safely, son.
326
00:19:08,749 --> 00:19:11,581
Martin, that is not the club I selected.
327
00:19:13,465 --> 00:19:15,474
Why are you not following our protocol?
328
00:19:19,166 --> 00:19:21,479
Oh. He's overhit that one,
the big eedjit.
329
00:19:24,455 --> 00:19:26,081
That was no accident.
330
00:19:26,082 --> 00:19:28,963
That's it!
You and me are done professionally!
331
00:19:34,621 --> 00:19:36,122
We're gonna win this.
332
00:19:41,069 --> 00:19:43,886
- He has to make this in one.
- Come on, Dad!
333
00:19:45,391 --> 00:19:46,700
You're not going to lose, are you?
334
00:19:46,701 --> 00:19:49,318
I thought I married the finest
handballer in all of Boyle.
335
00:19:52,555 --> 00:19:54,904
That's it!
Shift my mother.
336
00:19:57,615 --> 00:19:58,925
Jezus.
337
00:20:02,628 --> 00:20:04,522
It's up to you now hand.
338
00:20:35,073 --> 00:20:36,642
Loser!
339
00:20:38,290 --> 00:20:41,006
- I think this is our chance. Let's escape.
- Where?
340
00:20:41,106 --> 00:20:42,988
Follow me, Chubby Club!
341
00:20:45,998 --> 00:20:50,111
43, 44, 45, 46.
342
00:20:50,193 --> 00:20:52,084
I think he's actually passed out.
343
00:20:52,356 --> 00:20:53,790
Does that mean he's won?
344
00:20:54,466 --> 00:20:56,378
Why didn't you put money on it?
345
00:20:56,478 --> 00:20:57,812
Because it's not about money, Deb.
346
00:20:57,912 --> 00:21:00,271
You could've bet the mortgage
payment or something.
347
00:21:00,371 --> 00:21:03,120
No, You just don't get it.
It's about pride!
348
00:21:03,121 --> 00:21:06,516
I beat him. I beat The Leech.
I'm better than him.
349
00:21:07,838 --> 00:21:10,178
Liam, you still owe us
that mortgage payment!
350
00:21:10,180 --> 00:21:11,033
Oh Jezus!
351
00:21:11,639 --> 00:21:15,154
Right. Hide! Everyone hide,
hide quickly!
352
00:21:15,332 --> 00:21:16,442
The curtains!
353
00:21:20,377 --> 00:21:21,764
You alright there buddy?
354
00:21:21,852 --> 00:21:24,217
Yeah Sean.
I think so.
355
00:21:24,344 --> 00:21:26,281
Have you got enough money
for that computer thing yet?
356
00:21:26,604 --> 00:21:28,346
What are computers?
357
00:21:29,239 --> 00:21:30,795
Oh Balls.
358
00:21:35,674 --> 00:21:38,105
Liam, I think he can see us.
359
00:21:42,290 --> 00:21:43,574
Yeah, I know.
360
00:21:50,038 --> 00:21:54,108
That is the single greatest thing
my little eyes have ever witnessed.
361
00:21:54,109 --> 00:21:59,232
Transcribed and synced by Cosa
28194
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