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Previously on Greek...
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00:00:01,520 --> 00:00:03,855
- So how is the real world?
- [Blows whistle]
3
00:00:03,889 --> 00:00:07,258
- Oh. - Tell rusty I'm using
my not-rape taxi whistle.
4
00:00:07,292 --> 00:00:09,494
- Talk to you later, bye.
- Your lsat score was higher than mine.
5
00:00:09,528 --> 00:00:11,896
- So was my gpa.
- Careful, Cartwright.
6
00:00:11,930 --> 00:00:14,232
I've been accepted
into cru law.
7
00:00:14,266 --> 00:00:17,301
- I'm ready to kick your ass in law school.
- Bring it. And me, too.
8
00:00:17,336 --> 00:00:19,737
- What do you want?
- I want you to want more for yourself.
9
00:00:19,771 --> 00:00:23,141
Because you deserve it for you,
not just for me.
10
00:00:23,175 --> 00:00:26,177
- [Rusty] I don't remember him from photos.
- Me neither, but he's a legacy.
11
00:00:26,211 --> 00:00:29,881
- [Cappie] Welcome to kt.
- New pledge spidey!
12
00:00:29,915 --> 00:00:33,017
Maybe you should try being one of the guys.
What about joining a fraternity?
13
00:00:33,051 --> 00:00:35,553
Which one of you little maniacs
wants to bid me first?
14
00:00:35,587 --> 00:00:38,189
- Dale, what are you doing here?
- Picking the number one house.
15
00:00:38,223 --> 00:00:41,926
- Congratulations. - I cannot wait
to see how rusty takes this news.
16
00:00:45,797 --> 00:00:48,733
- Oh, hey, the roommate returneth.
- [Rusty] Hey.
17
00:00:49,968 --> 00:00:51,235
With youeth.
18
00:00:51,270 --> 00:00:53,237
Yeah.
We've been at Dana's.
19
00:00:53,272 --> 00:00:54,906
Her roommate was out
of town for the weekend.
20
00:00:54,940 --> 00:00:57,141
Yeah. So we started re-watching
lost from the beginning
21
00:00:57,176 --> 00:00:59,610
to count the number of questions
that they never answered.
22
00:00:59,645 --> 00:01:01,612
Then we started
pretending we were lost,
23
00:01:01,647 --> 00:01:04,649
and couldn't get off
the island of her bed.
24
00:01:04,683 --> 00:01:06,150
Huh...
25
00:01:07,286 --> 00:01:09,387
Classes start tomorrow.
How've you been?
26
00:01:09,421 --> 00:01:12,056
Oh, yeah.
Upper division, baby!
27
00:01:12,090 --> 00:01:15,526
You know, we haven't had a chance to talk
since rush, but I'm sorry kt didn't work out.
28
00:01:15,561 --> 00:01:19,163
We can only take legacies because
of the Jack-ass Omega chis.
29
00:01:19,198 --> 00:01:21,999
That's a little harsh. How do you know
another fraternity didn't go after me?
30
00:01:22,034 --> 00:01:24,602
We should do something to cheer you up.
Something crazy.
31
00:01:24,636 --> 00:01:27,138
Ooh! We could
have a dinner party!
32
00:01:27,172 --> 00:01:30,808
- A dinner party?
- A murder mystery dinner party!
33
00:01:30,842 --> 00:01:33,778
And I'll cook.
It'll be tofu, couscous and murder!
34
00:01:33,812 --> 00:01:37,448
- Sure. It'll be killer fun.
- Yeah!
35
00:01:37,482 --> 00:01:41,652
I'm actually
gonna be, uh, pretty busy.
36
00:01:41,687 --> 00:01:45,389
- Why are you wearing an Omega chi pledge pin?
- I'm pledging Omega chi!
37
00:01:45,424 --> 00:01:48,826
- Omega who?
- Let's go, plebe!
38
00:01:48,860 --> 00:01:50,995
You got more Mayo-ritos to finish!
What do you say?!
39
00:01:51,029 --> 00:01:52,563
Thank you, sir,
may I have another?
40
00:01:56,535 --> 00:01:59,470
- Sorry about the door, Rus.
- Yeah. Don't...
41
00:02:08,647 --> 00:02:10,481
What are you doing up?
42
00:02:12,651 --> 00:02:14,719
Can't sleep.
43
00:02:14,753 --> 00:02:16,721
I miss summer.
44
00:02:16,755 --> 00:02:18,356
And Evan.
45
00:02:18,390 --> 00:02:23,527
Well, I appreciate you respecting
the "no boys upstairs" rule.
46
00:02:23,562 --> 00:02:25,496
Huh?
47
00:02:25,530 --> 00:02:27,365
Oh, sure.
48
00:02:27,399 --> 00:02:29,867
And he wanted to get a good night's sleep
before his first day of law school.
49
00:02:29,901 --> 00:02:33,170
Torts and civil
procedures tomorrow. [Laughs]
50
00:02:33,205 --> 00:02:36,841
I'm re-reading
the first 20 chapters.
51
00:02:36,875 --> 00:02:38,476
Seriously,
it is so much material.
52
00:02:38,510 --> 00:02:41,579
It makes me wonder if it
would have been this bad at GW.
53
00:02:41,613 --> 00:02:44,048
- Well, I'm glad you're here.
- Really?
54
00:02:44,082 --> 00:02:48,719
'Cause this is the last of the Cheesaritos, and
it's your job as house mom to go get more.
55
00:02:48,754 --> 00:02:51,722
- That's why we let you stay here for free.
- It is on my list.
56
00:02:51,757 --> 00:02:54,125
Right after I learn what
habeas corpus means.
57
00:02:54,960 --> 00:02:57,428
- Night.
- Night.
58
00:03:02,901 --> 00:03:06,437
[Door knob rattling]
59
00:03:11,109 --> 00:03:13,844
Come on,
it is a four-digit code.
60
00:03:13,879 --> 00:03:16,213
How did we survive without
a house mom for so...?
61
00:03:19,117 --> 00:03:20,484
Rebecca! Rebecca!
62
00:03:28,527 --> 00:03:30,027
[Groans]
63
00:03:30,062 --> 00:03:32,763
I have a fire... pokey-thing!
64
00:03:34,333 --> 00:03:37,268
- [Girl] Casey?
- Burglar?
65
00:03:41,640 --> 00:03:45,476
- Ashleigh!
- [Screaming, laughing]
66
00:03:45,510 --> 00:03:48,412
Oh, my God!
You changed the keypad code!
67
00:03:48,447 --> 00:03:51,382
- What are you doing here?
- Ashleigh!
68
00:03:51,416 --> 00:03:53,851
- Is this your first grown-up vacay?
- Yeah. Well, kind of.
69
00:03:53,885 --> 00:03:58,289
Well, it's more of a permanent
vacay 'cause I got fired.
70
00:04:00,792 --> 00:04:03,227
From your dream job?
71
00:04:03,261 --> 00:04:05,363
I'm so sorry.
72
00:04:06,698 --> 00:04:09,266
And I'm so not
done hugging you.
73
00:04:09,301 --> 00:04:12,403
- [Both laughing]
- Another one's back.
74
00:04:14,239 --> 00:04:16,907
Come on in, sis.
75
00:04:19,039 --> 00:04:23,671
Sync by n17t01
www.addic7ed.com
76
00:04:26,079 --> 00:04:28,214
- [Ashleigh] We stayed up too
late, didn't we? - No way.
77
00:04:28,248 --> 00:04:32,351
I haven't seen you in months.
And I still think what faith did sucks.
78
00:04:32,385 --> 00:04:36,288
Those hours, all that running around, and
then she fires you? You were unpaid!
79
00:04:36,323 --> 00:04:39,792
I know! I'm so glad to be
back here with you,
80
00:04:39,826 --> 00:04:41,927
and all my friends,
and free food.
81
00:04:41,962 --> 00:04:44,063
[Laughs] Well,
it's not exactly free.
82
00:04:44,097 --> 00:04:46,365
Whatever.
You're such a house mom.
83
00:04:46,399 --> 00:04:49,869
- How's that going?
- Um... so far, so good.
84
00:04:49,903 --> 00:04:52,104
It bought a lot of goodwill
with my parents,
85
00:04:52,139 --> 00:04:56,408
who were less than thrilled with
my game of musical law schools.
86
00:04:56,443 --> 00:04:58,310
Oh, what did your parents say?
87
00:04:58,345 --> 00:05:01,347
Oh, they said I could always move back home.
And pay rent.
88
00:05:01,381 --> 00:05:05,084
And work in my dad's accounting firm.
That'd just be New York with math.
89
00:05:05,118 --> 00:05:08,220
- So you're definitely not going
back to New York? - I'm not sure.
90
00:05:08,255 --> 00:05:10,589
- How long are you staying?
- Calm down, the closer.
91
00:05:10,624 --> 00:05:13,959
[Chuckles] I have no idea
what I'm going to do.
92
00:05:13,994 --> 00:05:17,797
I had this great plan and now I
don't, so I'm kinda freaking out.
93
00:05:17,831 --> 00:05:20,766
So for now, I plan to eat
this toast and take a shower
94
00:05:20,801 --> 00:05:22,768
and have no regrets
about quitting.
95
00:05:22,803 --> 00:05:26,705
- I thought you said you were fired.
- Yeah. Well, it was mutual.
96
00:05:26,740 --> 00:05:30,009
You know, creative differences.
What time does your class start?
97
00:05:30,043 --> 00:05:32,878
- Oh, crap. Have I got to go.
- Wait! Hold on!
98
00:05:35,682 --> 00:05:38,017
- I made you lunch.
- Aw!
99
00:05:38,051 --> 00:05:42,121
Ten tater chips,
four slices of Turkey
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00:05:42,155 --> 00:05:44,456
and a cookie
the size of my head.
101
00:05:44,491 --> 00:05:47,893
- You're welcome.
- Well, I'm glad you're back.
102
00:05:47,928 --> 00:05:50,863
- For however long you're here.
- Me, too.
103
00:05:50,897 --> 00:05:54,400
- So are you ready for your first day of law school?
- Ready as I'll ever be.
104
00:06:00,340 --> 00:06:01,974
What...?
105
00:06:04,644 --> 00:06:08,147
- Spidey?
- I reported for pledge duties,
106
00:06:08,181 --> 00:06:10,683
but, uh, the brothers
were unresponsive.
107
00:06:10,717 --> 00:06:14,119
Wow. I'm off to class.
108
00:06:14,154 --> 00:06:16,055
Cap? It's, like, 9:30.
109
00:06:16,089 --> 00:06:19,158
Am. In the morning.
110
00:06:19,192 --> 00:06:21,126
Yeah. I'm trying this
semester, remember?
111
00:06:21,161 --> 00:06:25,030
That's great, but we have an emergency.
Dale's pledging Omega chi.
112
00:06:25,065 --> 00:06:27,166
Really? You know,
if I think about it,
113
00:06:27,200 --> 00:06:29,802
Dale's always had a proclivity to
joining cult-like institutions.
114
00:06:29,836 --> 00:06:32,872
Listen to me. "Proclivity.
" I'm not even in class yet.
115
00:06:32,906 --> 00:06:36,242
- We hate the Omega chis, right?
- Hey, pledge spidey,
116
00:06:36,276 --> 00:06:38,644
could you tidy up a little bit
while cappie and I talk?
117
00:06:38,678 --> 00:06:42,548
- I think they gave Dale a bid just to mess with me.
- It wouldn't surprise me.
118
00:06:42,582 --> 00:06:44,683
Maybe they were the ones who
called the cops on our rush party
119
00:06:44,718 --> 00:06:47,186
to get back at us
for spring break.
120
00:06:47,220 --> 00:06:49,288
I bet daley will drop out
before anything bad happens.
121
00:06:49,322 --> 00:06:52,524
He's far too gentle a soul
to fraternize with such nimrods.
122
00:06:52,559 --> 00:06:54,660
What if we make him a kt first?
123
00:06:54,694 --> 00:06:56,829
- We can only take legacies.
- What if we come up with a way
124
00:06:56,863 --> 00:07:00,332
- to make him a legacy? - Yeah, but how are you...
? Spidey, just leave it.
125
00:07:00,367 --> 00:07:03,168
If you get killed,
we don't have any more pledges.
126
00:07:04,571 --> 00:07:07,239
Ok. We need Dale here.
We're the house he really wanted.
127
00:07:07,274 --> 00:07:10,542
Besides, our one pledge
is kind of a dud, anyway.
128
00:07:10,577 --> 00:07:14,113
- He's not that bad.
- Help me! Help me! Help me!
129
00:07:15,949 --> 00:07:18,651
- I'll go save spider-woman.
- I'll save Dale.
130
00:07:19,786 --> 00:07:21,620
Sh...
131
00:07:22,689 --> 00:07:24,056
There you are.
132
00:07:30,463 --> 00:07:33,933
Hey, cappie. You do
realize it's 10am, right?
133
00:07:33,967 --> 00:07:36,602
Uh, I believe
our truce is over.
134
00:07:36,636 --> 00:07:39,972
Look, I didn't bust the kt rush
party, if that's what you think.
135
00:07:40,006 --> 00:07:42,441
No, no, no, I'm sure there
are plenty of Omega chis
136
00:07:42,475 --> 00:07:46,045
who needed to screw us over so they
could make up for an election scandal
137
00:07:46,079 --> 00:07:49,615
and get back in the good graces
of their dumb-ass brothers.
138
00:07:49,649 --> 00:07:51,951
Well, I still come in peace.
139
00:07:58,058 --> 00:07:59,792
Ha!
140
00:07:59,826 --> 00:08:03,629
So a little ancient philosophy
141
00:08:03,663 --> 00:08:05,030
to cleanse the palate
of the soul?
142
00:08:05,065 --> 00:08:07,800
I guess so. I heard
the Professor was cool.
143
00:08:07,834 --> 00:08:10,169
- What about you?
- I'm trying this year.
144
00:08:10,203 --> 00:08:14,306
Which means a panoply of pre-noon
classes has opened up before me.
145
00:08:14,341 --> 00:08:16,308
[Woman] Welcome, truth-seekers.
146
00:08:16,343 --> 00:08:19,578
And congratulations
on taking a brave first step
147
00:08:19,612 --> 00:08:22,881
beyond the confines of Cru's
all-too-familiar
148
00:08:22,916 --> 00:08:25,417
"memorize and spew" curriculum.
149
00:08:25,452 --> 00:08:28,620
There are no tests, unless you
count the personal challenges
150
00:08:28,655 --> 00:08:31,290
inherent in any true
philosophical journey.
151
00:08:31,324 --> 00:08:33,792
No tests? Is this
what happens before noon?
152
00:08:33,827 --> 00:08:36,829
- I freaking love morning-time. - ...
Socrates, one of the founders
153
00:08:36,863 --> 00:08:40,366
of Western philosophy,
who believed that all you need
154
00:08:40,400 --> 00:08:43,869
to discover the secrets of
the universe is a question.
155
00:08:43,903 --> 00:08:46,405
This ideology birthed
the socratic method,
156
00:08:46,439 --> 00:08:48,807
a series of questions
from teacher to student,
157
00:08:48,842 --> 00:08:52,111
designed to force one
to examine one's own beliefs
158
00:08:52,145 --> 00:08:55,614
to achieve a higher sense
of understanding and truth.
159
00:08:55,648 --> 00:08:58,350
Higher sense of understanding?
I think I'd do better with tests.
160
00:08:58,385 --> 00:09:00,986
Your first assignment
will be to pick a partner.
161
00:09:01,021 --> 00:09:05,591
One of you will assume the role of socrates,
the other one, his star pupil, Plato.
162
00:09:05,625 --> 00:09:08,527
Have a dialogue and see where you get.
Your prompt?
163
00:09:12,432 --> 00:09:15,801
- "Why are we here?
" - I was just gonna ask myself that.
164
00:09:15,835 --> 00:09:18,570
- Partners?
- Uh, well,
165
00:09:18,605 --> 00:09:21,940
I guess if I'm gonna discover the secrets of
the universe with anyone, it's gonna be you.
166
00:09:21,975 --> 00:09:25,844
You flatter me.
And you're correct.
167
00:09:25,879 --> 00:09:27,780
[Scoffs]
168
00:09:35,388 --> 00:09:38,824
Oh... hey, hey!
169
00:09:38,858 --> 00:09:41,326
Psst! Why didn't you
save me a seat?
170
00:09:41,361 --> 00:09:44,530
And miss a chance to see you
squirming in the front row?
171
00:09:44,564 --> 00:09:46,632
I was here 20 minutes early
to get this one.
172
00:09:46,666 --> 00:09:50,002
Fair enough, chambers.
Game on.
173
00:09:50,036 --> 00:09:51,970
Every man and woman
for him or herself.
174
00:09:52,005 --> 00:09:54,773
Like that old law school adage: "Look
to your left, look to your right..."
175
00:09:54,808 --> 00:09:57,810
"One of them won't be here"?
I hope for your sake that isn't true.
176
00:09:57,844 --> 00:10:01,013
Hi, Jan Carnes, my husband Jim.
Northwestern undergrads.
177
00:10:01,047 --> 00:10:03,682
And fellow first year
lambs to the slaughter.
178
00:10:03,716 --> 00:10:07,786
- [All laugh] - [Man] Welcome,
welcome, welcome, first years,
179
00:10:07,821 --> 00:10:11,356
to the... study of torts.
180
00:10:11,391 --> 00:10:14,460
By now, you've done the reading,
you've noticed the copious material.
181
00:10:14,494 --> 00:10:19,131
It gets worse and we move fast, so I suggest
you find a damn good study group asap.
182
00:10:19,165 --> 00:10:21,767
- [All chuckle]
- Torts is defined
183
00:10:21,801 --> 00:10:24,736
as the body of law concerned
with civil wrongs.
184
00:10:24,771 --> 00:10:29,408
Torts differs from criminal law by, among
other things, the burden of proof.
185
00:10:29,442 --> 00:10:34,680
Would you care to illuminate that
difference for me, Mr... Chambers?
186
00:10:34,714 --> 00:10:37,916
Yeah. Uh, the burden of proof
in criminal law,
187
00:10:37,951 --> 00:10:41,587
it differs from torts
in as such... that, um...
188
00:10:41,621 --> 00:10:43,989
Would anyone care to help out
miss teen South Carolina?
189
00:10:44,023 --> 00:10:46,058
[Laughter]
190
00:10:46,092 --> 00:10:49,261
You. Yes? In the red.
Name, please?
191
00:10:49,295 --> 00:10:52,164
Um, Casey Cartwright. And I think what Mr.
Chambers meant to say
192
00:10:52,198 --> 00:10:55,367
is that criminal cases must be
proven beyond a reasonable doubt
193
00:10:55,401 --> 00:11:00,372
and civil cases only require a
preponderance of the evidence.
194
00:11:00,406 --> 00:11:04,510
Chambers. It's no free pass
being the progeny of the elite.
195
00:11:04,544 --> 00:11:08,847
I believe it took jfk, Jr.
Three tries to pass the bar.
196
00:11:09,949 --> 00:11:11,884
That's good, Ms. Cartwright.
197
00:11:11,918 --> 00:11:15,854
Now, how about Mrs. carnes?
198
00:11:15,889 --> 00:11:18,524
In the lange motors case,
from the reading,
199
00:11:18,558 --> 00:11:21,860
was sexual harassment proved by
a preponderance of the evidence?
200
00:11:21,895 --> 00:11:25,531
In that case, yes, but the facts to me
implied that she might've been lying.
201
00:11:25,565 --> 00:11:28,367
Which, in that event, hurts
real sexual harassment victims.
202
00:11:28,401 --> 00:11:31,637
Interesting. Anyone care to
cite a present-day example?
203
00:11:32,972 --> 00:11:35,974
- You, sir, name?
- Jim carnes.
204
00:11:36,009 --> 00:11:39,011
Uh, we heard about one right
here at cru law, right?
205
00:11:39,045 --> 00:11:42,581
Someone contested their admissions
denial and claimed sexual harassment.
206
00:11:42,615 --> 00:11:45,417
- I'm not familiar.
- [Jan] Apparently, this woman,
207
00:11:45,451 --> 00:11:47,452
who received an unfavorable
letter of recommendation,
208
00:11:47,487 --> 00:11:51,323
claimed the guy was biased because
she was having sex with him
209
00:11:51,357 --> 00:11:54,326
- and had it rescinded so she could get in.
- Well... [clears throat]
210
00:11:54,360 --> 00:11:57,896
Does she have a case?
Mr. chambers?
211
00:11:57,931 --> 00:12:01,433
Uh, she doesn't need one.
She got in.
212
00:12:04,037 --> 00:12:06,071
I would imagine. [Clears throat]
213
00:12:06,105 --> 00:12:09,741
Legality aside,
if she had sex with the guy
214
00:12:09,776 --> 00:12:11,577
and still received a bad rec,
215
00:12:11,611 --> 00:12:14,613
it sounds like not getting into law
school isn't her only problem.
216
00:12:14,647 --> 00:12:16,748
[Laughter]
217
00:12:16,783 --> 00:12:20,652
- Or maybe she didn't have sex
with him at all. - Or that also.
218
00:12:22,155 --> 00:12:26,024
- Elaborate, Ms. Cartwright.
- What I meant to say
219
00:12:26,059 --> 00:12:28,994
is that when dealing
with a preponderance,
220
00:12:29,028 --> 00:12:32,764
there's always room for doubt.
Maybe we're all misinformed.
221
00:12:32,799 --> 00:12:36,268
Maybe she didn't have sex with him and
that's why he wrote the bad letter.
222
00:12:36,302 --> 00:12:39,738
Maybe she confronted him, for all we
know, and that's why he rescinded it.
223
00:12:39,772 --> 00:12:42,774
I mean, what proof do you...
224
00:12:42,809 --> 00:12:45,877
Or we, for that matter, have?
225
00:12:45,912 --> 00:12:49,748
[Professor] Hm. Ah...
226
00:12:49,782 --> 00:12:52,150
Ok, causation.
227
00:12:55,054 --> 00:12:57,356
[Exhales] Right.
228
00:12:58,591 --> 00:13:00,192
Hey, your text
said it was urgent.
229
00:13:00,226 --> 00:13:02,995
Hey. Yeah, I just...
What happened to you?
230
00:13:03,029 --> 00:13:05,564
This? Just some new gear
I flipped at the mall.
231
00:13:05,598 --> 00:13:08,166
I'm on my way to a pledge
mixer with the pi pi pis.
232
00:13:08,201 --> 00:13:11,970
- You mean the tri pis?
- I just wanna look sharp for the ladies, right?
233
00:13:12,005 --> 00:13:13,472
Well, you look like
a teen movie villain.
234
00:13:13,506 --> 00:13:15,540
And you look like the nerdy girl
before her makeover.
235
00:13:15,575 --> 00:13:17,609
- Oh! - What if I told
you there's a way
236
00:13:17,644 --> 00:13:19,645
to get you out of those shirts
and into a better fraternity?
237
00:13:19,679 --> 00:13:21,747
I'd say that's impossible.
238
00:13:21,781 --> 00:13:26,251
- What's this? - Meet your new Uncle
on your mother's side, Conrad Liddell.
239
00:13:26,286 --> 00:13:27,819
My friend's a
criminal psych major.
240
00:13:27,854 --> 00:13:29,855
So she scanned your photo
and then mocked up
241
00:13:29,889 --> 00:13:31,823
- what you could look like at 50.
- Pretty authentic, right?
242
00:13:31,858 --> 00:13:35,594
With those jowls? I look like
Michael Douglas in a wind tunnel.
243
00:13:35,628 --> 00:13:38,664
The real Conrad Liddell
was a kappa tau at uva.
244
00:13:38,698 --> 00:13:42,567
This will make you a legacy so you can
rush kappa tau and wear whatever you want.
245
00:13:42,602 --> 00:13:44,870
I don't want to wear
whatever I want.
246
00:13:44,904 --> 00:13:48,240
The guys say you should dress for the
job you want, not the one you have.
247
00:13:48,274 --> 00:13:50,542
That's pretty smart, right?
248
00:13:52,312 --> 00:13:55,314
Look, I think they might
be leading you on, ok?
249
00:13:55,348 --> 00:13:57,683
It's not a real bid.
They're just messing with you
250
00:13:57,717 --> 00:14:00,018
to get back at me and kappa tau
for spring break.
251
00:14:00,053 --> 00:14:01,486
You know what?
It is a real bid.
252
00:14:01,521 --> 00:14:04,056
So you can take your
Conrad Liddell glamour shot
253
00:14:04,090 --> 00:14:05,691
and stick it in
your bunsen burner.
254
00:14:05,725 --> 00:14:07,225
Rusty's just
looking out for you.
255
00:14:07,260 --> 00:14:09,628
Yeah? Ok. Well, the Omega chis
want me for me.
256
00:14:09,662 --> 00:14:13,165
So just accept that,
you kappa tau.
257
00:14:18,713 --> 00:14:21,749
So besides picking up trash,
what else do kt pledges do?
258
00:14:21,783 --> 00:14:25,186
Party, pranks,
general campus mayhem.
259
00:14:25,220 --> 00:14:28,022
One time I TP'd my neighbor's house,
but then I cleaned it up the next day
260
00:14:28,056 --> 00:14:30,791
- 'cause he got mad.
- Pledge spidey!
261
00:14:30,826 --> 00:14:34,395
Stand completely still
and silent for five minutes!
262
00:14:34,429 --> 00:14:37,364
Hey, pledge educator.
How's the kt crop coming?
263
00:14:37,399 --> 00:14:40,267
Oh, they're great.
He's great. It's great.
264
00:14:40,302 --> 00:14:43,204
- And the Omega chi crop?
- Oh, yeah, they're great.
265
00:14:43,238 --> 00:14:45,573
- Even Dale?
- I know, I can't believe it either,
266
00:14:45,607 --> 00:14:48,909
- but he's way into pledging.
- But are you way into him?
267
00:14:48,944 --> 00:14:51,812
I mean, he's not exactly ripped from
the pages of a j. Crew catalog.
268
00:14:51,847 --> 00:14:55,282
We don't all look like j. Crew models.
Have you seen Marco lately?
269
00:14:55,317 --> 00:15:00,654
Dale's the guy who started u-sag to
destroy fraternities a couple years ago.
270
00:15:00,689 --> 00:15:03,290
He's got a glow-in-the-dark
Jesus hanging above his bed.
271
00:15:03,325 --> 00:15:05,726
Admit it, you guys
are screwing with him.
272
00:15:05,760 --> 00:15:07,595
Do you really think
that we would do that?
273
00:15:07,629 --> 00:15:10,664
- That I would do that?
- So, what happened?
274
00:15:10,699 --> 00:15:12,633
Did you sell Dale
to them before bid night?
275
00:15:12,667 --> 00:15:15,136
I didn't have to, Rus,
'cause I wasn't even there.
276
00:15:15,170 --> 00:15:18,005
They like what he brings.
He respects tradition.
277
00:15:18,039 --> 00:15:20,174
He's a complete gentleman.
And he makes a huge effort.
278
00:15:20,208 --> 00:15:23,611
- Dale's pledging is legit?
- Completely.
279
00:15:23,645 --> 00:15:25,546
[Peter grunts]
280
00:15:27,449 --> 00:15:30,317
My equilibrium's
off for some reason.
281
00:15:32,921 --> 00:15:34,522
[Ashleigh] Ok. So in Manhattan,
282
00:15:34,556 --> 00:15:37,491
here's how we check to see if
our cosmos have been roofied.
283
00:15:37,526 --> 00:15:39,527
So dip your finger
in it like so,
284
00:15:39,561 --> 00:15:43,397
and then dab the circle on the
special coasters I gave you.
285
00:15:43,431 --> 00:15:45,533
- And if it turns blue...
- You're pregnant?
286
00:15:45,567 --> 00:15:46,800
If you don't do it right.
287
00:15:48,537 --> 00:15:49,470
[Ashleigh] Oh, Casey!
288
00:15:49,504 --> 00:15:51,672
A toast to Casey's
289
00:15:51,706 --> 00:15:53,807
- first day of law school!
- Oh, thanks.
290
00:15:53,842 --> 00:15:54,975
No, wait!
That might've been roofied!
291
00:15:57,679 --> 00:16:00,181
Ah! What difference
does it make?
292
00:16:00,215 --> 00:16:02,516
Everyone at law school thinks
I slept my way in anyway.
293
00:16:02,551 --> 00:16:04,818
Wait, what? How?
294
00:16:04,853 --> 00:16:07,488
The Joel-thing made it
out of the admissions office,
295
00:16:07,522 --> 00:16:11,192
through the rumor mill, and somehow
I became an opportunistic slut.
296
00:16:11,226 --> 00:16:13,127
But you didn't do
anything wrong.
297
00:16:13,161 --> 00:16:15,329
Then why do I feel like Betsy
when she told everyone
298
00:16:15,363 --> 00:16:17,798
she didn't puke in the DVD player
after winter formal junior year?
299
00:16:17,832 --> 00:16:19,667
I didn't!
300
00:16:22,771 --> 00:16:25,472
Ok, but these are law students.
Aren't they supposed to know the truth,
301
00:16:25,507 --> 00:16:27,841
and handle it and stuff?
302
00:16:27,876 --> 00:16:31,212
- Yeah... - [Rebecca] One
thing I learned from my dad:
303
00:16:31,246 --> 00:16:36,350
Deny, deny, deny. And if you can't
deny, pin it on someone else.
304
00:16:36,384 --> 00:16:39,653
No, I'm not gonna do that.
This isn't the Greek system.
305
00:16:39,688 --> 00:16:41,388
This is law school,
these are mature adults.
306
00:16:41,423 --> 00:16:43,991
I'm going to go in there
and plead my case.
307
00:16:44,025 --> 00:16:45,926
Well, I'll drink to that!
308
00:16:45,961 --> 00:16:48,429
Well, you seem less
freaked out than this morning.
309
00:16:48,463 --> 00:16:51,699
Because you know what's better
than being in college?
310
00:16:51,733 --> 00:16:55,069
Being at college and not having to go to class.
I had the best day ever!
311
00:16:55,103 --> 00:16:58,739
I had no school, no job.
It was like summer in September.
312
00:16:59,841 --> 00:17:01,775
- I got a pedicure.
- Oh!
313
00:17:01,810 --> 00:17:05,846
I hate you and I'm so sick of school already.
I can't stand it.
314
00:17:05,880 --> 00:17:09,383
Ok, now I am in the
mood for that toast.
315
00:17:09,417 --> 00:17:14,221
Oh! And look at our coasters.
There are no roofies in our drinks.
316
00:17:14,256 --> 00:17:16,457
- Cheers!
- Yay!
317
00:17:16,491 --> 00:17:18,425
No roofies.
318
00:17:20,662 --> 00:17:23,764
- Oh, dibs on socrates.
- How come I have to be the student?
319
00:17:23,798 --> 00:17:26,166
Because Plato's
symposium is a...
320
00:17:26,201 --> 00:17:29,937
"Handbook for those embarking
on a homoerotic-spiritual path."
321
00:17:29,971 --> 00:17:34,608
- Really?
- Now, tell me, young Plato,
322
00:17:34,643 --> 00:17:37,778
- why are we here?
- Because we're doing this assignment.
323
00:17:37,812 --> 00:17:39,647
But why are we
doing this assignment?
324
00:17:39,681 --> 00:17:41,415
Because the
Professor told us to.
325
00:17:41,449 --> 00:17:45,052
- Ok, a little help, Plato.
- Ok, um...
326
00:17:45,086 --> 00:17:48,789
I'm here because I'm
interested in examining life,
327
00:17:48,823 --> 00:17:51,325
and my life
and why I do what I do.
328
00:17:51,359 --> 00:17:55,729
And why do you think you do the things you
do, the way you do the things you do?
329
00:17:57,198 --> 00:18:00,334
Because...
330
00:18:00,368 --> 00:18:03,337
I don't know how to answer that.
This all sounds like stoner talk.
331
00:18:03,371 --> 00:18:07,007
- Well, we could, if you
think it'd help. - What?
332
00:18:07,042 --> 00:18:09,276
- No.
- As your intellectual midwife,
333
00:18:09,311 --> 00:18:11,912
- I really think it would help loosen up your...
- This is for a real grade.
334
00:18:11,946 --> 00:18:15,082
What? Come on.
"Why are we here?"
335
00:18:15,116 --> 00:18:18,352
She's ordering us to get high.
336
00:18:19,788 --> 00:18:21,622
You know what?
I have a better idea.
337
00:18:21,656 --> 00:18:23,190
One that doesn't
involve us getting high.
338
00:18:23,224 --> 00:18:25,859
[Scoffs] You say that
like it's a good thing.
339
00:18:30,265 --> 00:18:32,366
You got in pretty
late last night.
340
00:18:32,400 --> 00:18:35,536
I had a pledge thing at the
fraternity that doesn't want me.
341
00:18:35,570 --> 00:18:38,539
Look, I was
out of line earlier.
342
00:18:38,573 --> 00:18:41,008
Apparently,
Omega chi totally wants you.
343
00:18:41,042 --> 00:18:43,210
Which is... great.
344
00:18:43,244 --> 00:18:46,647
But why do you want them?
Out of all the fraternities on campus,
345
00:18:46,681 --> 00:18:50,784
you picked the one house that's the
epitome of the Greek system you hated
346
00:18:50,819 --> 00:18:52,553
and one currently I
don't care for either.
347
00:18:52,587 --> 00:18:55,889
Not everything in the
Greek system is about you.
348
00:18:55,924 --> 00:18:58,359
What about God?
I mean, did you talk to him?
349
00:18:58,393 --> 00:19:00,728
- Or your parents?
- Most pre-war fraternities
350
00:19:00,762 --> 00:19:04,565
were founded on Christian values, including Omega chi.
We're a divine institution.
351
00:19:04,599 --> 00:19:06,400
My parents offered
to pay my pledge dues.
352
00:19:06,434 --> 00:19:08,635
My dad even chuckled when
I told him about the branding.
353
00:19:08,670 --> 00:19:12,706
- What branding?
- You know, just a little... [hisses]
354
00:19:12,741 --> 00:19:14,775
Action right there.
Omega chi.
355
00:19:14,809 --> 00:19:16,977
They're gonna brand
their letters on your ass?
356
00:19:17,011 --> 00:19:19,179
No, I'm just a pledge.
I can't get all the letters.
357
00:19:19,214 --> 00:19:22,049
- Just the "x.
" - Because it marks the spot of a moron?
358
00:19:22,083 --> 00:19:23,550
Kt doesn't even do any of that.
359
00:19:23,585 --> 00:19:25,386
Because Omega means "the end,"
360
00:19:25,420 --> 00:19:27,020
and there is no end
to Omega chi.
361
00:19:27,055 --> 00:19:28,822
You get an Omega when
you've done pledging,
362
00:19:28,857 --> 00:19:31,692
to remind you that even though your
time as a novice is complete, you...
363
00:19:31,726 --> 00:19:33,827
I shouldn't be telling
you any of this.
364
00:19:33,862 --> 00:19:36,363
You shouldn't know any of this.
It's like you joined a cult.
365
00:19:36,398 --> 00:19:38,465
They told me you'd say that.
366
00:19:46,474 --> 00:19:48,842
Hey, guys. I'd like to set
the record straight.
367
00:19:48,877 --> 00:19:53,313
I am, in fact, the woman who protested
the admissions recommendation letter.
368
00:19:53,348 --> 00:19:56,617
But I can assure you that I
was nothing more than the victim
369
00:19:56,651 --> 00:19:59,453
of a personal attack
by someone I trusted.
370
00:19:59,487 --> 00:20:04,358
And did not have sex with.
He eventually plead guilty to what he did,
371
00:20:04,392 --> 00:20:07,661
and subsequently said he
would rescind said letter.
372
00:20:07,695 --> 00:20:09,563
So here I am.
373
00:20:11,433 --> 00:20:13,200
And may I remind you,
374
00:20:13,234 --> 00:20:16,103
torts, preponderance
of the evidence.
375
00:20:16,137 --> 00:20:17,971
Ok, thanks.
376
00:20:20,308 --> 00:20:21,675
You know,
I took a summer prep class.
377
00:20:21,709 --> 00:20:24,044
I'm so ready to dive in
and give it a hundred percent.
378
00:20:24,078 --> 00:20:26,814
- So can I join your study group?
- Yeah, no.
379
00:20:26,848 --> 00:20:31,351
- We don't have enough chairs.
- Well, I can bring a chair over.
380
00:20:31,386 --> 00:20:35,489
- Right, Evan? - Yes, she can.
She's very strong.
381
00:20:36,724 --> 00:20:38,425
How well do you
two know each other?
382
00:20:38,460 --> 00:20:40,727
- We used to date.
- Oh, Evan,
383
00:20:40,762 --> 00:20:44,331
- did you work in undergrad admissions?
- Ok, what is your problem?
384
00:20:44,365 --> 00:20:48,435
Our problem is we have 30 cases
to summarize by next week.
385
00:20:48,470 --> 00:20:52,072
We want the best students in the class,
not someone who got in on a technicality.
386
00:20:52,106 --> 00:20:55,342
- I would be a total asset.
- It's taken you...
387
00:20:55,376 --> 00:20:56,877
Don't even go there.
388
00:20:58,980 --> 00:21:02,216
I aced the lsat.
I got better grades than Evan.
389
00:21:02,250 --> 00:21:04,051
I'm just trying
to plead my case.
390
00:21:04,085 --> 00:21:06,353
Well, if you're just trying
to plead your case,
391
00:21:06,387 --> 00:21:08,956
then you should know that
your argument is flawed.
392
00:21:08,990 --> 00:21:10,858
It's totally based on hearsay.
393
00:21:10,892 --> 00:21:14,761
Ok. There's cutthroat, and then
there's just being an ass.
394
00:21:15,797 --> 00:21:17,264
And you are the latter.
395
00:21:24,492 --> 00:21:26,059
Case, wait up.
396
00:21:26,094 --> 00:21:27,728
Thanks for nothing back there.
397
00:21:27,762 --> 00:21:31,064
I'm sorry, but you called me out and
I got caught up in the competition.
398
00:21:31,099 --> 00:21:33,100
You're the one that said
every man for himself.
399
00:21:33,134 --> 00:21:35,202
You had no problem
showing me up in class.
400
00:21:35,236 --> 00:21:37,637
That's when I thought we were
dealing with adults in there.
401
00:21:37,672 --> 00:21:41,641
Law school is worse than the Greek system.
It's like junior high!
402
00:21:41,676 --> 00:21:44,444
- "We don't have enough chairs."
- [Laughs]
403
00:21:44,479 --> 00:21:47,481
Look, maybe the pressure
brings out the worst in us,
404
00:21:47,515 --> 00:21:51,618
but summer jobs and scholarships
are on the line. Especially mine.
405
00:21:51,652 --> 00:21:54,154
Well, at least you
have a study group.
406
00:21:54,188 --> 00:21:57,591
- Forget it, I will think of something.
- Why don't you talk to Segal?
407
00:21:57,625 --> 00:21:59,893
See if he can assign you
to a group or something.
408
00:21:59,927 --> 00:22:03,630
Oh, great, now I'm rusty
in High School.
409
00:22:07,668 --> 00:22:10,804
The meaning of life?
I don't think so.
410
00:22:10,838 --> 00:22:12,672
- It was just a bunch of skits.
- Ok, you're right.
411
00:22:12,707 --> 00:22:15,675
The movie had nothing to do with the
meaning of life or why we're here.
412
00:22:15,710 --> 00:22:18,211
But you totally laughed when
that guy ate until he exploded.
413
00:22:18,246 --> 00:22:21,915
- Cautionary tales are funny.
- [Ashleigh] Calvin!
414
00:22:21,949 --> 00:22:25,318
- Hey! How are you? You're back.
- Hey!
415
00:22:25,353 --> 00:22:27,454
- Yeah! - Ashleigh, I
haven't talked to you
416
00:22:27,488 --> 00:22:31,091
- since that phone call when you told me I suck.
- And I still think you do.
417
00:22:31,125 --> 00:22:33,693
- Well, good day, then.
- Good day to you.
418
00:22:33,728 --> 00:22:35,796
- So, Calvin...
- I said good day, sir!
419
00:22:39,167 --> 00:22:42,035
Wow. I see you brought some
of that New York edge with you.
420
00:22:42,070 --> 00:22:44,237
- What are you doing back?
- Oh, licking my wounds.
421
00:22:44,272 --> 00:22:48,041
Trying to find someone to play with.
Everyone has boring class.
422
00:22:48,076 --> 00:22:51,445
Hard to believe,
considering we're in college.
423
00:22:51,479 --> 00:22:54,815
I have to finish an assignment.
I'm trying to figure out the meaning of life
424
00:22:54,849 --> 00:22:58,151
- and why I'm here.
- [Laughs] Well, while you're at it,
425
00:22:58,186 --> 00:23:02,089
can you figure out why I'm here, instead of
staying one step ahead of the zeitgeist?
426
00:23:02,123 --> 00:23:05,058
What happened?
427
00:23:05,093 --> 00:23:09,996
I just thought that if I came back
home, everything would be better.
428
00:23:10,031 --> 00:23:14,601
But everyone has something to do.
Even you, figuring out the meaning of life.
429
00:23:14,635 --> 00:23:18,505
- I am purposeless.
- Ooh. I can relate.
430
00:23:18,539 --> 00:23:21,074
Please. You're, like, the most
figured-out person I know.
431
00:23:21,109 --> 00:23:23,910
[Laughs] Thanks.
432
00:23:23,945 --> 00:23:27,280
Um, I think I'm gonna
go home and take a nap.
433
00:23:27,315 --> 00:23:30,717
So, um, have fun examining
your life with cappie.
434
00:23:30,751 --> 00:23:32,819
And I bet he tries
to get you stoned.
435
00:23:32,854 --> 00:23:34,554
[Laughs]
436
00:23:37,892 --> 00:23:39,893
Why the hell not?
437
00:23:42,964 --> 00:23:45,866
He called it
a divine institution.
438
00:23:45,900 --> 00:23:49,269
Omega chi? Now, he's
getting his butt branded?
439
00:23:49,303 --> 00:23:53,807
I think Dale wants more than
just tradition and brotherhood.
440
00:23:53,841 --> 00:23:58,278
- I can relate.
- It's week one, spidey. Be patient.
441
00:23:58,312 --> 00:24:01,815
- He wants to meet a girl.
- We'll get you that, too.
442
00:24:01,849 --> 00:24:04,451
- That'd be nice.
- No, I meant Dale.
443
00:24:04,485 --> 00:24:09,923
All we have to do is find him a girl
before Omega chi does and he'll drop out.
444
00:24:09,957 --> 00:24:13,293
- A little divine intervention,
if you will. - I will.
445
00:24:13,327 --> 00:24:16,329
- But how?
- At our murder mystery party!
446
00:24:16,364 --> 00:24:18,665
- Or the...
- Oh, no, come on!
447
00:24:18,699 --> 00:24:22,869
We can have all the tradition and
costumes and crazy fun of a fraternity
448
00:24:22,904 --> 00:24:25,772
right here in a very safe,
controlled environment.
449
00:24:25,806 --> 00:24:27,340
Top it off with
a pretty girl for Dale.
450
00:24:27,375 --> 00:24:30,143
The only question is how
are we gonna get him here?
451
00:24:30,178 --> 00:24:33,180
The answer is by force.
452
00:24:40,454 --> 00:24:42,956
Um, Professor Segal?
453
00:24:42,990 --> 00:24:45,859
Ms. Cartwright.
454
00:24:45,893 --> 00:24:47,360
Could I talk to you
about yesterday?
455
00:24:47,395 --> 00:24:51,298
I wanted to address the rumors
about how I got into cru law.
456
00:24:51,332 --> 00:24:55,168
How you got in is irrelevant.
You're here now. Do your best.
457
00:24:55,203 --> 00:24:57,671
Yes, but I need you
to know that I got in on merit.
458
00:24:57,705 --> 00:25:01,141
And I need to know that the false
things other students say about me
459
00:25:01,175 --> 00:25:03,643
- won't affect the way that you judge me.
- It won't.
460
00:25:03,678 --> 00:25:06,613
Your performance in class
is all that matters.
461
00:25:08,249 --> 00:25:09,849
Great. Um...
462
00:25:09,884 --> 00:25:12,419
But I know that you said
that it's really important
463
00:25:12,453 --> 00:25:14,487
that we get into a study group,
and the other students
464
00:25:14,522 --> 00:25:16,523
have frozen me out because of
this rumor that isn't even true.
465
00:25:16,557 --> 00:25:21,461
- So could you assign me to a group?
- Sure.
466
00:25:21,495 --> 00:25:24,197
Do you want me to make an
announcement in class?
467
00:25:24,232 --> 00:25:27,033
No. Unless you want to.
468
00:25:27,068 --> 00:25:30,036
Sure, I can pick you up
some diapers while I'm at it.
469
00:25:30,071 --> 00:25:32,005
I'm not your nanny,
I'm your law Professor.
470
00:25:32,039 --> 00:25:34,541
How your classmates treat you
is not my concern.
471
00:25:34,575 --> 00:25:37,410
But I didn't do anything wrong.
472
00:25:37,445 --> 00:25:40,747
This is an adversarial
profession, Ms. Cartwright.
473
00:25:40,781 --> 00:25:44,184
How you deal with it will determine
your success or your failure.
474
00:25:44,218 --> 00:25:46,453
Ok?
475
00:25:53,928 --> 00:25:57,530
[Trip] All right, ladies.
Iron's hot.
476
00:25:57,565 --> 00:26:00,800
We're starting with
your first pledge bro.
477
00:26:00,835 --> 00:26:05,705
As interim president, let me be the
first to welcome you to Omega chi.
478
00:26:05,740 --> 00:26:08,942
Ok. Here we go.
479
00:26:08,976 --> 00:26:11,344
On three.
480
00:26:11,379 --> 00:26:15,515
One, two, three!
481
00:26:15,549 --> 00:26:16,783
- [Sizzling]
- [Groaning]
482
00:26:16,817 --> 00:26:19,953
- Ow!
- Ooh!
483
00:26:23,658 --> 00:26:26,726
[Banging on door]
484
00:26:30,197 --> 00:26:31,931
[Shouting]
485
00:26:31,966 --> 00:26:34,634
Spidey, run interference.
Go, go, go!
486
00:26:34,669 --> 00:26:36,536
Rusty? Ah!
487
00:26:37,738 --> 00:26:40,440
Hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry!
488
00:26:40,474 --> 00:26:44,377
The condor is away!
Egress, egress!
489
00:26:48,883 --> 00:26:49,916
Hello.
490
00:26:56,873 --> 00:27:01,744
- [Laughter] - Ok, you guys
are really freaking me out.
491
00:27:01,778 --> 00:27:03,746
[Soft rock plays]
492
00:27:05,382 --> 00:27:07,583
♪ Sit back, take a rest ♪
493
00:27:07,618 --> 00:27:11,687
Oh, my gosh!
He looks like a rabbit.
494
00:27:11,722 --> 00:27:13,055
- Who?
- Him.
495
00:27:13,090 --> 00:27:14,557
No, his ears are too short.
496
00:27:14,591 --> 00:27:18,494
He looks like, um, link
from legend of Zelda, you know?
497
00:27:18,528 --> 00:27:21,931
- [Laughing]
- Know what I mean?
498
00:27:23,634 --> 00:27:26,636
Man, I'm so glad we came
around to your idea,
499
00:27:26,670 --> 00:27:30,439
- but, um...
- But what?
500
00:27:30,474 --> 00:27:32,041
- What?
- What?
501
00:27:32,075 --> 00:27:35,211
- Was I talking?
- [Both laughing]
502
00:27:41,151 --> 00:27:42,585
Oh.
503
00:27:46,890 --> 00:27:48,324
- You know what?
- Hm?
504
00:27:48,358 --> 00:27:51,093
[British accent] I'm gonna explode
like that guy in the movie.
505
00:27:51,128 --> 00:27:53,262
- [Groaning]
- [Laughing]
506
00:27:53,297 --> 00:27:57,667
- Oh, man, like a piñata.
- Wait a minute, wait a minute.
507
00:27:57,701 --> 00:28:01,103
- We gotta do this assignment.
- Oh, right.
508
00:28:01,138 --> 00:28:03,306
- Ok.
- Ok.
509
00:28:03,340 --> 00:28:05,908
- Ok.
- Why am I here?
510
00:28:05,942 --> 00:28:08,611
- Right.
- [Sighs] Why am I here?
511
00:28:10,580 --> 00:28:12,682
Oh, dude.
Oh, my gosh. I got it.
512
00:28:12,716 --> 00:28:15,084
Oh, God, ok.
Listen to this, right?
513
00:28:15,118 --> 00:28:17,486
Ok. How do I say this? Um...
514
00:28:17,521 --> 00:28:21,424
Ok, so basically there's, like, a lot
of reasons, right, why we're here.
515
00:28:21,458 --> 00:28:24,827
But the reasons
are not as important
516
00:28:24,861 --> 00:28:29,498
as the people who ask
the questions, you know?
517
00:28:29,533 --> 00:28:34,170
Like any kid on campus,
or an astronaut.
518
00:28:34,204 --> 00:28:35,604
Or like Rachel ray, man.
519
00:28:35,639 --> 00:28:37,707
Rachel ray!
520
00:28:37,741 --> 00:28:40,609
I mean, we're not...
We don't have the answers.
521
00:28:40,644 --> 00:28:42,945
They do. Not me.
522
00:28:42,979 --> 00:28:44,980
Not me. Not you.
523
00:28:45,015 --> 00:28:47,650
So how can we know
if we're not them?
524
00:28:47,684 --> 00:28:51,253
That... is...
525
00:28:51,288 --> 00:28:52,888
Brilliant.
526
00:28:54,458 --> 00:28:56,359
Yeah, man.
527
00:28:57,394 --> 00:28:58,994
Does that even make sense?
528
00:28:59,029 --> 00:29:01,664
[Mumbles]
529
00:29:01,698 --> 00:29:04,533
[Both laughing]
530
00:29:05,969 --> 00:29:08,337
- Oh, I made a mess.
- Oh, no!
531
00:29:08,372 --> 00:29:10,539
You have chips on your butt.
532
00:29:12,175 --> 00:29:13,409
[Laughing]
533
00:29:13,443 --> 00:29:15,978
[Jazz plays]
534
00:29:18,382 --> 00:29:20,516
I am lady fuchsia,
535
00:29:20,550 --> 00:29:24,820
and welcome to murder manor, where an
unthinkable deed has just occurred.
536
00:29:24,855 --> 00:29:27,423
And by that I mean... murder!
537
00:29:27,457 --> 00:29:31,927
What? You kidnapped me for this?
I thought this was a kt prank.
538
00:29:31,962 --> 00:29:36,599
- You embarrass yourself, sir.
- Yeah, by attending this nerd coachella.
539
00:29:37,934 --> 00:29:40,136
You embarrass yourself further!
540
00:29:40,170 --> 00:29:42,671
- [Laughter]
- But who did it?
541
00:29:43,607 --> 00:29:45,341
[Shouts] But who did it?
542
00:29:46,510 --> 00:29:47,510
None of us,
543
00:29:47,544 --> 00:29:51,514
lady fuchsia, the sous chef,
544
00:29:51,548 --> 00:29:55,484
not even I, the
esteemed doctor goldenrod,
545
00:29:55,519 --> 00:29:59,522
nor... jockey nantucket red
546
00:29:59,556 --> 00:30:01,857
is above suspicion.
547
00:30:03,527 --> 00:30:06,362
All right. Um, I gotta
get back to the house.
548
00:30:08,231 --> 00:30:10,199
So trip can scar you for life?
549
00:30:10,233 --> 00:30:12,768
- And you think this won't?
- I saved your butt back there.
550
00:30:12,803 --> 00:30:16,038
- Literally. - My butt didn't need saving.
My butt needed an "x" on it.
551
00:30:16,072 --> 00:30:18,073
I know the theme's
kind of lame.
552
00:30:18,108 --> 00:30:19,708
- Yeah.
- Ok.
553
00:30:19,743 --> 00:30:22,978
But Dana's got a friend Molly
here and she wants to meet you.
554
00:30:23,013 --> 00:30:26,248
- Hi. - The one with the
slight but sexy overbite?
555
00:30:26,283 --> 00:30:29,652
Yeah. Just give it an hour..
556
00:30:29,686 --> 00:30:31,487
If you two don't hit it off,
you can leave.
557
00:30:31,521 --> 00:30:34,490
Man, the things
I do for a girl.
558
00:30:34,524 --> 00:30:37,626
Welcome to my world.
559
00:30:37,661 --> 00:30:39,495
Smashing, then!
560
00:30:39,529 --> 00:30:40,830
The game's afoot!
561
00:30:42,032 --> 00:30:43,833
Jockey nantucket red,
562
00:30:43,867 --> 00:30:46,402
I'd like you to meet
chambermaid brown.
563
00:30:48,438 --> 00:30:50,573
Hi. Nantucket.
564
00:30:50,607 --> 00:30:52,408
Chambermaid. [Laughs]
565
00:30:57,447 --> 00:30:59,348
I gotta drop this class.
566
00:30:59,382 --> 00:31:01,851
- Well, you quit easy.
- I can't do it.
567
00:31:01,885 --> 00:31:03,819
Tests and quizzes,
that I can handle.
568
00:31:03,854 --> 00:31:07,723
But examining my life, you know,
trying to find some purpose?
569
00:31:07,757 --> 00:31:10,526
- [Imitates gunshot] - You don't
need this class for your major?
570
00:31:12,329 --> 00:31:14,630
Cappie, what do you
think my major is?
571
00:31:14,664 --> 00:31:18,033
It's, um, business.
572
00:31:19,236 --> 00:31:21,170
No, uh, architecture.
573
00:31:21,204 --> 00:31:24,206
Architectural business...
574
00:31:24,241 --> 00:31:26,842
- ...Relations?
- I don't have a major.
575
00:31:26,877 --> 00:31:29,512
What?
How do I not know this?
576
00:31:29,546 --> 00:31:31,647
No one does,
'cause I don't tell anyone.
577
00:31:31,681 --> 00:31:35,384
'Cause I don't want anyone
to think that I'm like, uh...
578
00:31:37,120 --> 00:31:39,555
Me?
579
00:31:39,589 --> 00:31:43,559
Everyone thinks I'm Mr.
Together, but the truth is,
580
00:31:43,593 --> 00:31:45,728
I have no idea what I'm doing.
581
00:31:45,762 --> 00:31:48,264
So, what makes you happy?
582
00:31:49,499 --> 00:31:51,600
Finally admitting that.
[Laughs]
583
00:31:51,635 --> 00:31:55,037
Not having to try so hard to seem
like I've got it all figured out.
584
00:31:55,071 --> 00:31:59,275
Being with heath,
who doesn't even know.
585
00:31:59,309 --> 00:32:03,913
- And what are you afraid of?
- Picking something I hate just to pick.
586
00:32:03,947 --> 00:32:06,949
And then realizing years later
that I have made a huge mistake
587
00:32:06,983 --> 00:32:10,286
that I've screwed up
my entire life.
588
00:32:10,320 --> 00:32:13,756
I guess if you don't pick
anything, eventually,
589
00:32:13,790 --> 00:32:15,791
it'll be too late
to choose any of them.
590
00:32:15,825 --> 00:32:19,094
- Hm.
- So, what do you wanna do?
591
00:32:19,129 --> 00:32:22,765
Honestly, I want to do
something that matters.
592
00:32:22,799 --> 00:32:25,601
Makes the world
a better place. I know.
593
00:32:25,635 --> 00:32:28,437
- It's cheesy and clichéd.
- Yeah.
594
00:32:29,406 --> 00:32:31,874
Uh, hey guys,
have you seen rusty?
595
00:32:33,043 --> 00:32:34,810
Um...
596
00:32:34,844 --> 00:32:37,980
No, Cal and I
are just here all day.
597
00:32:38,014 --> 00:32:41,417
Studying. Um...
Why would you need rusty?
598
00:32:41,451 --> 00:32:45,054
Well, the truth is I've been
having a horrible couple of days,
599
00:32:45,088 --> 00:32:49,658
and I'm looking at a hard three-year
sentence of being the law school pariah.
600
00:32:49,693 --> 00:32:51,927
And rusty knows
what that's like.
601
00:32:55,265 --> 00:32:56,932
Wait, are you guys high?
602
00:32:56,967 --> 00:32:59,468
Uh, not anymore.
603
00:33:00,570 --> 00:33:02,504
It was for class, I swear.
604
00:33:02,539 --> 00:33:05,975
Oh, for class.
Of course it was.
605
00:33:06,843 --> 00:33:09,178
Casey, wait up!
606
00:33:13,750 --> 00:33:17,453
So, uh, when you're not cleaning
chamberpots, what's your major?
607
00:33:17,487 --> 00:33:23,292
Applied mathematics.
With a 3.86 repeating gpa.
608
00:33:23,326 --> 00:33:24,927
Wow.
609
00:33:24,961 --> 00:33:28,097
[Cockney accent]
And I do deduce
610
00:33:28,131 --> 00:33:30,532
this one's got
a look of guilt about 'im.
611
00:33:30,567 --> 00:33:35,304
- Have you been a naughty lad?
- Really?
612
00:33:35,338 --> 00:33:38,674
Uh, apparently while
bridling the stallion,
613
00:33:38,708 --> 00:33:43,045
- I heard a commotion in the armory.
- That's the tv area.
614
00:33:43,079 --> 00:33:46,982
And the chambermaid should show you
the clue she found in the hedge maze.
615
00:33:47,017 --> 00:33:50,152
Shall we?
616
00:33:50,186 --> 00:33:52,821
All right. Hour's up,
gold rod. I gotta go.
617
00:33:52,856 --> 00:33:56,859
- But the game's not done.
- Ok. Samir's the killer.
618
00:33:57,827 --> 00:33:59,094
Based on what?
619
00:34:00,563 --> 00:34:03,632
- Racial profiling?
- No, based on common sense.
620
00:34:03,667 --> 00:34:05,734
You're only an assistant chef,
so you're resentful
621
00:34:05,769 --> 00:34:08,337
and your job gives you easy access
to all kinds of murder weapons.
622
00:34:08,371 --> 00:34:10,873
Come on. You nerds
didn't figure this out?
623
00:34:10,907 --> 00:34:14,243
We nerds?
We're your circle, Dale.
624
00:34:14,277 --> 00:34:18,814
We read the same books as you.
We laugh at your chemistry puns.
625
00:34:18,848 --> 00:34:21,316
And don't tell me you'll meet
a girl like Molly at Omega chi.
626
00:34:21,351 --> 00:34:24,853
I hope not. No offense,
but I can do better.
627
00:34:24,888 --> 00:34:26,989
I didn't eat mayonnaise burritos
to date the Molly's of the world.
628
00:34:27,023 --> 00:34:31,126
Wow, ok. You're the
perfect Omega chi after all.
629
00:34:31,161 --> 00:34:36,899
You're snobby, shallow and just way
better than any of us losers, right?
630
00:34:36,933 --> 00:34:39,201
Dale's an Omega chi?
631
00:34:41,104 --> 00:34:44,173
Admit it, you can't accept that
you're no longer the only nerd
632
00:34:44,207 --> 00:34:48,143
- who can fit in and join a fraternity.
- Have you met our new pledge?
633
00:34:48,178 --> 00:34:50,179
Yeah, and where is he?
634
00:34:50,213 --> 00:34:54,216
Maybe you should worry about your own
pledge who you left at Omega chi.
635
00:35:02,926 --> 00:35:06,028
- [Door opens] - I hate this
school and everyone in it!
636
00:35:06,062 --> 00:35:09,698
Stupid cappie! I thought that
he'd want to change for himself,
637
00:35:09,733 --> 00:35:12,634
but there he was,
baked like a stoner freshman!
638
00:35:12,669 --> 00:35:14,603
I am so stupid
for staying at cru.
639
00:35:14,637 --> 00:35:17,873
Wait, I thought that you stayed
here for yourself and for rusty
640
00:35:17,907 --> 00:35:20,342
- and for the great law program.
- Yeah, yeah, all that crap.
641
00:35:20,376 --> 00:35:23,612
But a little bit for cappie, too,
and that's driving me crazy!
642
00:35:23,646 --> 00:35:27,182
I thought if I stayed,
he'd try, finally. Maybe.
643
00:35:27,217 --> 00:35:29,384
You need to forget about all
that 'cause you're here now.
644
00:35:29,419 --> 00:35:33,088
Well, here, my Professor, who
grades me, thinks I'm a weak bimbo.
645
00:35:33,123 --> 00:35:35,858
And here, my classmates
think that I'm a slut.
646
00:35:35,892 --> 00:35:37,493
I hate here.
647
00:35:39,162 --> 00:35:41,830
Well, then let's go.
I mean, we're adults.
648
00:35:41,865 --> 00:35:44,399
- We can do whatever we want, right?
- No, we can't just leave.
649
00:35:44,434 --> 00:35:47,302
- I can't just go.
- Yeah, you're right.
650
00:35:47,337 --> 00:35:49,104
[Sighs]
651
00:35:51,775 --> 00:35:53,075
But what's stopping me?
652
00:35:53,109 --> 00:35:56,545
I'd save my parents
a forte on tuition.
653
00:35:56,579 --> 00:35:59,481
Yeah.
Why not travel for a while?
654
00:35:59,516 --> 00:36:01,583
There's so much
world out there to see!
655
00:36:01,618 --> 00:36:04,787
Then I'll get a congressional
aide job and work my way up.
656
00:36:04,821 --> 00:36:08,357
I'll be in Washington three years early.
I don't even need to be here.
657
00:36:08,391 --> 00:36:10,526
So are we really doing this?
658
00:36:10,560 --> 00:36:13,061
Hell, yes. Pack your bags,
we leave in five!
659
00:36:15,131 --> 00:36:17,065
- All done.
- This is so Thelma & Louise.
660
00:36:17,100 --> 00:36:20,269
- Oh, my God!
- [Laughing]
661
00:36:20,303 --> 00:36:22,104
What if we get
to the grand canyon?
662
00:36:23,439 --> 00:36:25,307
We keep driving.
663
00:36:29,148 --> 00:36:31,282
Oh, no.
664
00:36:31,817 --> 00:36:32,517
Excuse me. Excuse me.
665
00:36:33,185 --> 00:36:37,021
Yeah, that's better. [Laughs]
666
00:36:37,890 --> 00:36:39,757
I guess spider-man
does stick to walls.
667
00:36:40,492 --> 00:36:43,060
- [Laughter]
- [Muffled speech]
668
00:36:43,462 --> 00:36:45,363
Not funny. Ok.
669
00:36:49,067 --> 00:36:50,735
Brace yourself.
670
00:36:53,872 --> 00:36:55,740
- You ass face!
- Ass what?
671
00:36:56,742 --> 00:36:58,509
You're the worst pledge
educator in history, ever!
672
00:36:59,411 --> 00:37:00,511
- Spidey, calm down.
- No, you calm down!
673
00:37:01,580 --> 00:37:03,381
- No, you calm down.
- You forgot me at Omega chi?
674
00:37:04,316 --> 00:37:06,717
I'm sorry. It's terrible
what they did to you.
675
00:37:07,286 --> 00:37:08,519
At least they noticed me.
676
00:37:09,855 --> 00:37:13,658
All you care about is that Dale, who
really wants to be an Omega chi.
677
00:37:14,593 --> 00:37:18,362
I'd kill to be a kt,
even if I wasn't a legacy.
678
00:37:21,533 --> 00:37:25,469
Because I can count on one finger how
many High School parties I went to.
679
00:37:26,305 --> 00:37:28,940
I know I could use
some socialization.
680
00:37:29,708 --> 00:37:31,108
And here you are,
this confident guy
681
00:37:31,944 --> 00:37:32,710
who's an honors
engineering major, too.
682
00:37:33,512 --> 00:37:35,646
You're an honors
engineering major?
683
00:37:37,216 --> 00:37:39,450
I want to be the cool guy
for once in my life.
684
00:37:39,985 --> 00:37:40,651
What's wrong with that?
685
00:37:41,553 --> 00:37:42,520
You know, I wasn't
always this confident.
686
00:37:43,422 --> 00:37:44,855
It's something
that I got from kappa tau.
687
00:37:45,557 --> 00:37:47,057
When's that
gonna happen for me?
688
00:37:47,559 --> 00:37:51,329
We'll discuss it tonight when we're putting
shaving cream on beaver when he sleeps.
689
00:37:52,497 --> 00:37:55,233
It's a little game I like
to call "living dangerously."
690
00:37:56,401 --> 00:37:57,335
Just don't leave me behind.
691
00:37:58,070 --> 00:37:59,337
I promise you, buddy, I won't.
692
00:38:00,339 --> 00:38:02,840
Now, how are we gonna
get you down from here?
693
00:38:03,775 --> 00:38:07,044
You got any WD-40?
It neutralizes the adhesive.
694
00:38:07,312 --> 00:38:09,247
Yeah.
695
00:38:12,584 --> 00:38:14,752
Ok. So say something
about leaving Cyprus.
696
00:38:15,354 --> 00:38:17,555
Um... uh, suck it, Cyprus!
697
00:38:18,257 --> 00:38:20,024
Casey and ashleigh are leaving.
698
00:38:20,993 --> 00:38:22,126
- [Phone rings]
- Oh, wait, hold on. Keep going.
699
00:38:23,495 --> 00:38:24,895
- Keep going. - Can you just answer
it so we can get on the road?
700
00:38:25,564 --> 00:38:26,464
No, I can't, 'cause it's faith.
701
00:38:27,266 --> 00:38:28,799
Well, she's not settling
for voicemail.
702
00:38:29,868 --> 00:38:32,069
That's pretty obsessive
for a woman who fired you.
703
00:38:32,771 --> 00:38:34,605
Ok. She didn't fire me.
I left.
704
00:38:35,607 --> 00:38:39,110
- I know, you said you quit.
- No, I just left.
705
00:38:44,116 --> 00:38:46,717
A full-time opening came up,
and faith gave the job
706
00:38:47,753 --> 00:38:50,521
to some talentless reality
wannabe from the outside,
707
00:38:51,256 --> 00:38:51,822
just because she
was on the city.
708
00:38:52,758 --> 00:38:55,426
- Was it Whitney port?
- Missing the point.
709
00:38:56,228 --> 00:38:57,862
- Right.
- I... I went to New York
710
00:38:59,064 --> 00:39:00,765
thinking friends apartment
and sex and the city soirees.
711
00:39:01,967 --> 00:39:06,671
- Yes. - And yes, we both watch
way too much television.
712
00:39:07,472 --> 00:39:10,941
But when I was in my
roach-filled dump
713
00:39:11,576 --> 00:39:13,811
with no friends and no money,
714
00:39:14,946 --> 00:39:17,481
and then you called and said
that you're not coming to dc,
715
00:39:18,050 --> 00:39:20,384
and so even the slim hope
716
00:39:21,253 --> 00:39:24,021
of weekend reunions
on the train was gone.
717
00:39:24,523 --> 00:39:26,190
Ash, I had no idea.
718
00:39:27,159 --> 00:39:30,728
Faith asked me to go
on my thousandth coffee run
719
00:39:31,430 --> 00:39:34,999
and I left
and I never came back.
720
00:39:36,301 --> 00:39:38,536
[Phone rings]
721
00:39:39,237 --> 00:39:40,338
What if she thinks you're dead?
722
00:39:41,239 --> 00:39:43,274
- [Laughs]
- No, you have to talk to her.
723
00:39:44,242 --> 00:39:47,178
- She's probably worried.
- Oh. Or furious.
724
00:39:47,946 --> 00:39:50,448
You can't run from her forever.
725
00:39:54,386 --> 00:39:56,787
Ok. Ok.
726
00:39:59,491 --> 00:40:00,725
Hi, faith. [Laughs]
727
00:40:01,360 --> 00:40:03,361
Oh, yeah, I'm ok.
I'm sorry.
728
00:40:04,663 --> 00:40:07,264
I just kind of freaked out about
work, and so I came back to Cyprus.
729
00:40:07,699 --> 00:40:10,801
I am so, so sorry.
730
00:40:13,405 --> 00:40:15,039
Yeah, I know.
731
00:40:16,108 --> 00:40:18,209
I know. I'm sor...
732
00:40:19,678 --> 00:40:22,246
Yeah, I know, I'll...
733
00:40:24,015 --> 00:40:26,684
All I can do is apologize.
734
00:40:36,194 --> 00:40:37,561
Now, I'm fired.
735
00:40:42,534 --> 00:40:44,535
We can't go.
736
00:40:45,103 --> 00:40:46,670
We're not kids anymore.
737
00:40:47,239 --> 00:40:49,373
We can't just run away.
738
00:40:51,276 --> 00:40:53,611
We're not Thelma and Louise.
739
00:40:55,947 --> 00:40:58,048
Come here.
740
00:40:59,451 --> 00:41:00,951
- [Knocking on window]
- [Gasps]
741
00:41:01,086 --> 00:41:03,287
Hey, case! Where are
we on those Cheesaritos?
742
00:41:04,156 --> 00:41:06,791
Yes, I am getting you
the Cheesaritos.
743
00:41:07,325 --> 00:41:08,859
[Rebecca] Appreciate it.
744
00:41:20,839 --> 00:41:22,273
[Laughing]
745
00:41:23,341 --> 00:41:25,476
Beaver caught me putting
shaving cream in his hair.
746
00:41:26,611 --> 00:41:28,379
This is my punishment for not
putting up enough resistance
747
00:41:29,214 --> 00:41:29,747
to your little murder
mystery abduction.
748
00:41:30,782 --> 00:41:32,082
- About earlier...
- Let's just agree to disagree
749
00:41:33,785 --> 00:41:36,487
- about my new affiliation. - I don't want to do that.
I want to be excited for you.
750
00:41:37,956 --> 00:41:40,825
I know this is a 180 for me.
But that doesn't have to be a bad thing, right?
751
00:41:41,760 --> 00:41:43,928
Isn't that why you
joined kappa tau? To change?
752
00:41:45,497 --> 00:41:50,301
I guess it's hard for me to accept because
I don't think you need to change.
753
00:41:52,037 --> 00:41:52,703
I appreciate that.
754
00:41:53,405 --> 00:41:54,572
But I do need
to do this for me.
755
00:41:55,740 --> 00:42:00,110
Just like you need to do this
murder mystery crap for Dana.
756
00:42:02,681 --> 00:42:03,814
Don't worry, pledge.
757
00:42:04,883 --> 00:42:07,918
I know a trick to get
the permanent ink off your face.
758
00:42:14,426 --> 00:42:15,593
[Clear throat]
759
00:42:16,461 --> 00:42:19,029
I did my own study
notes on all the cases.
760
00:42:19,965 --> 00:42:20,798
I made extra copies,
if anyone wants them.
761
00:42:21,566 --> 00:42:22,600
Don't worry,
I'm not asking to trade.
762
00:42:23,268 --> 00:42:26,103
Oh, no thanks, we're covered.
763
00:42:26,905 --> 00:42:29,006
Let me know
when you're uncovered.
764
00:42:29,307 --> 00:42:30,875
Ok, case.
765
00:42:32,177 --> 00:42:33,911
- What the hell was that?
- What did I do?
766
00:42:35,347 --> 00:42:37,882
Because what? Ow.
Class... beginning.
767
00:42:39,050 --> 00:42:42,119
Before we begin, I have one
brief announcement to make.
768
00:42:43,455 --> 00:42:46,390
We have a newly arrived transfer
student who just got late acceptance
769
00:42:46,925 --> 00:42:48,559
into the jd-mba program.
770
00:42:49,194 --> 00:42:51,395
Please welcome, Ms. Parker.
771
00:42:52,898 --> 00:42:55,136
Didn't you get rejected
from that program?
772
00:42:55,561 --> 00:42:57,905
- Wait. Isn't that...?
- Katherine?
773
00:42:58,105 --> 00:43:00,034
- Hello, Casey! - Hey, if you're
looking for a study group...
774
00:43:00,162 --> 00:43:02,546
Can you not interrupt me while I'm
waving to my friend, thank you.
775
00:43:13,291 --> 00:43:16,374
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776
00:43:16,424 --> 00:43:20,974
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